The F Plus - 53: Socks, Bots and Burps

Episode Date: July 1, 2011

Some of our favorite F+ content has come to us, unsolicited, by our listeners. Honestly, I don't know how it is that you're coming across this kind of reading material, but I'm glad you do. To that end, we're offering three profoundly strange listener submissions: The first is fiction involving a transmogrification fetish, the second is a confession of one woman's love for a Peterbilt truck, and the third? Burp fetish. Yes, you read that right, burp fetish. This week, The F Plus tries to find their missing sock.

Are there any vids of girls burping on a guy's dick while she's giving him a blowjob? I really fucking hope so. I think this is something that a lot of us have a fetish for. But I haven't had much luck finding something like this. Let me shape it any way you want. You've got the power to turn on the light Hello there! Welcome to the F-Plus Podcast. Terrible Things, Red with Enthusiasm.

My name's Lemon. And I'm John. And, uh, John, I, uh, remember that last, uh, uh, listener submission episode we did? Oh, yeah, yeah, kind of a little smattering of different stuff, stuff that our great and beautiful and kind listeners sent to us. I liked that one a lot. There was that lady who thought she was God.

There was all those fan fiction quotes. And I didn't have to spend several hours on the internet looking for inflation fetishists. So pretty much the best of all worlds. It's true. John, I am ready to do another one of these. Oh, awesome. What do we got? Okay, we're going to be covering

three subjects. Now, on a scale of one to boner, tell me what you think of these. All right, let me get out my protractor. All right, here we go. They're called barley cors, the units of measurement Alright

So, topic number one Transformative fiction Like changing into subjects Where a guy changes into a sock I'd give it about a 3.7 so far Alright, excellent Now we have, second up is Mrs. Prime.

It is a lady who is very, very much in love with Optimus Prime from the Transformers cartoon. That's getting a bae boner. That's half-masked. That's nice. We're not done yet. There is topic number three. It is dudes who are really into

ladies burping. We hit boner. We got it.ping. Oh, we hit boner. We got it. Excellent. Well, we want to thank our listeners for submitting to this. I will give you the shout out at the end. So stay tuned for that if you're those three people. Otherwise, let's get to the readers.

Let's. In the room tonight, we have Jack Chick. Kim Kardashian. I've changed into blah. Jimmy Franks. Belch. Bunny Bread. Another proud member of the EBDTGDMMM.

Boots Reindeer. Hey guys, is it cool if I vomit in these burping forums? John. Since I turned into a sock, my stomach is so full of gas. Can I bore you? And Lemon. I love seeing how a girl's burping usually have a style to them. We're starting with Choose Your Own Change.

It's a choose your ownure transformation fetish page. It begins with the CoronaVac. Do you need to explain what a CoronaVac is? It's a thing that plugs into a computer that you can just change anything into anything else magically. Fun time. This page added on 80703 at 101954 PM. Jeff got his package in the mail and opened it. He noticed the USB cable, so he hooked the device up to his PC.

When he installed the program, the device came to life. Each of the ten displays lit up the computer screen. Read, please configure, choose ten options. There were a list of options Jeff looked through them and chose a few that sounded interesting. Nationality, age, gender, height, breasts, chest, waist, hips, and legs. The screen flash configuration complete. In the ten slots appeared the options Jeff had chosen, and the number beneath that read 000 on all the slots. He unplugged the device-a-dand.

Along with the ten options, there were four other buttons off slash on save undo and unaware okay the off and on button and the unaware button both had leds above them to show status perfect jeff pushed all of the option buttons but nothing happened he heard a door slam and his little sister walked in passing in front of him and went into the kitchen. The device came to life. The word scanning came on then. All the option boxes changed from 000s to proper values. Holy shit, it works. Now what? Did the device say holy shit it works? Like is it a surprise?

Yes. The device said holy shit it works. The device was quite clearly the subject of that sentence. All right, so are we supposed to... So we're supposed to decide which way this goes, right? So should I read out all the options? Let's do that. Yeah, all right.

After I say each one, tell me what you think. So what do you do now, little sister? Hmm, transformation packages. His mom walks in and he shows it to her oh his best friends arrives i like his best friends arrives tested on himself m okay so m is self-pleasure so he's gonna test it on himself and then jerk it apparently right yeah for the birthday girl. Yeah. I don't think anything good has started for the birthday girl.

Okay, Jeff's dad stops by. Secret desires. Sex, self-pleasure, and nudity. Oh, that sounds like the dirtiest one. I'm going to read some nudity here. Testing it on Jock Big Bro and his buddy.

Now, okay, keep that one in mind. The next one is his big brother enters with eight of his teammates. Oh, my. Oh, dear. They're all naked, evidently. And it contains shrinking and growing. Oh, hey, Jack, you're going to like this. His best friend arrives. Version two.

His best friend arrives in space. His best friend arrives back in time. Software update, Cronovac V.5. Nothing sexier than a software update. Accidentally changes himself with random button. I like that one. I don't know. I do like the random button. I would go with

random button or test it on himself. That's my personal opinion. See, I want to go with random button because it's got the masturbation thing by it. So whatever he turns into, he's going to whack it. No matter what. Even if he turns into a giant penis himself, somehow he will find.

Oh, I'm a leprous hyena. Whack, whack, whack. Jeff's dad stops by. Alright, I'm a leprous hyena. Whack, whack, whack. Jeff's dad stops by. Alright, you want Jeff's dad stops by. Alright, Jack Chick, why don't you take this one? Jeff's dad stops by. Unexpectedly, the door to Jeff's room swung open,

caused him to jump and turn around to face the door. Hey Jeff, I'm going to order some pizza before the game starts. You want anything special? His dad asked. His dad's pubescent. Hey, dad, I'm gong. His dad always made sure to ask Jeff if he wanted anything,

even though Jeff had no interest in the football game. No thanks, Jeff said with a smile. His dad, whose name was Mike, tried, but they really had very little in common. Jeff was no that popular and enjoyed computers. Jeff's dad, on the other hand, was a rugged-looking

man in his forties, wearing a pair of cargo pants and a red t-shirt. He was roughly shaven and pretty well-toned, giving him the appearance of one of those men that people would see in the various outdoor magazines. Like, you mean

nudist magazines, don't you? National Geographic, yeah. I'm pretty sure this guy hasn't ever seen, like, a muscular dude. Anyways. I like that he was roughly shaven. Like, he had a really bad razor. Ah! Jeff's dad always seemed to have a hard time since Jeff's mom left.

He worked in a low-income job. Sorry. He worked in a low-level job in an accounting company that he seemed to really hate. His dating life never seemed that great either. Even though he was able to get dates all of the time, he never found a woman that really made him happy. Nevertheless, his dad tried to put on a happy face so that Jeff would not worry about him.

When I think of an accountant, I really think of the brawny paper towel man. Alright. His dad said smiling. Hey, what's that? He asked noticing the program running on the computer behind Jeff and walking back to get a closer look and causing Jeff to turn back and see that the front of his back was still running.

Is that one of those things that makes you change into a lady? Jeff thought not sure if he wanted his dad to know about the bizarre new program. What am I going to do? What are you going to do? What are our options? Okay, Jeff changes his dad first. That's just got size shrinking and growing. His dad is looking for his sock, and that includes nudity and masturbation.

Yeah, that's the one. Dear! I think it's unanimous. I'm sorry, what are all the things contained in his dad is looking for his sock? Well, besides masturbation and nudity, there's body modification, muscle features, etc. What are all the things contained in his dad is looking for his sock? Well, besides masturbation and nudity, there's body modification, muscle features, etc. Inanimate. Size, shrinking, growing, other slash none. Keep in mind also that the first update we read was written in 2003.

The second one, 2007, and this one was added to it two months ago. This is a real slow burn. Yeah. A month and a half ago, so this is some fresh fiction. Oh, this is going to include the death of Osama bin Laden and shit. It's going to be just tough. Bunnybread, do you want to read One Odd Sock?

No, he doesn't want to read One Odd Sock. That's a children's book I don't want to read. One Odd Sock. This page added it a half hour ago. Oh, Jeff, have you seen my other sock? Jeff's dad was holding a white sock in one hand with black sections at the toes and heel. Jeff looked down and saw his dad's bare feet, the hairy toes wriggling.

Okay, wait, hang on. You said hairy toes wiggling. Let me unbutton my pants. Okay, sorry. That's my trigger phrase. Intermission? All right. All right, go ahead.

I'm good. Oh, wow. Okay. I swear I don't know where they go. I always have one odd thought. Hey, what's that you're messing with? A huge hairy man moved over,

wrapping one strong arm around Jeff's shoulders. Jeff could smell the masculine scent of his father's musk as his warmth pressed against him, the hairy bearded face examining the screen curiously. Oh dear. Dad, you're real hot

when you're looking at a computer. Oh, is this a clothes catalog? Mind if I use it? No, it's a computer, idiot. Jesus. Dad is not bright without his sock. The sock was the source of all his intellect.

Oh, that's the Sears catalog, isn't it? No, Dad, that's a gun. Oh, put it down. Jeff tried to protest, but he was pushed along as his dad sat down in the chair. Jeff had left the screen on the inanimate slash clothing option, and his dad was rapidly clicking through it. Before Jeff knew what was happening, his dad

had selected single left sock. The last target that the Kronovac was set up for was Jeff himself. Okay, okay, wait, wait, wait. Just pause. Alright. Do we want to make a guess on what's going to happen next? I'm guessing that his dad will actually turn into a left sock. Yeah, that was my guess. Alright. You took it.

Sorry. Okay, I'm going to guess that a single left sock Is plucked out of the atmosphere on the other side of the world Alright He immediately felt a tingling rush across his body He moaned and whimpered As his clothes shivered on his body Rippling for an instant before dissolving into nothing

Flushing He covered his groin Trying to hide his nakedness from his dad As he turned around Bloody hell, Jeff Where did your clothes go? He covered his groin, trying to hide his nakedness from his dad as he turned around. Bloody hell, Jeff! Where did your clothes go? Jeff tried to reply, but he couldn't open his mouth. He reached up and touched his face and found only smooth flesh where his mouth should be.

Huh? The tingling rushing through his body was intense, and despite his resistance, he felt himself growing erect. Oh, that's not good. Well, it depends. You know, what is good, really? He felt lighter and weaker that his arms grew harder to move, sliding off his crotch and revealing his erection. He looked down

helplessly as it throbbed and began to shrink. Oh, they took a wrong turn here. Jeff, it's not you. It happens to a lot of socks. It grew smaller and

smaller, and his balls tightened and pulled upwards until, with a wriggle of pleasure, Jeff was left with nothing but smooth flesh between his legs. He looked pleadingly over to his father, who was left with nothing but smooth flesh between his legs. He looked pleadingly over to his father, who was watching silently, his mouth open with shock.

Oh? Hey, are those Sears catalogs that were once in your garage? Jeff's arms slowly flopped to his sides and grew thinner and smaller, pulling into his skin and melting away into nothing. His feet pulled together,

each forming a semicircle before the heels and toes melted into each other, his legs feeling into a fleshy tube. He wriggled and writhed as the hole grew longer, pushing up through his insides and making him hollow. You know, Bunny Bread, you started out with the hairy toes wiggling and I was so hot.

All of a sudden you have somebody turning into a flesh condom. Yeah, well, I, again, we started with toes, we wanted to, you know, suck you in with the obvious stuff, but we're trying to, you know, turn you on to something new, you know? Alright, I'll expand my horizons. Alright, Jeff flopped pathetically

backwards onto his bed as his groin and head felt odd. They began to grow darker, color deepening to a matte black, forming a circle of black skin on his featureless crotch and turning his head the same shade, while the rest of his skin grew lighter and paler, becoming a bright white. So not only is he a sock, but he has the little pattern on the toes and the heel. You wouldn't expect him to be a fucking tube sock, would you?

He could have been argyle. His head pulled down against his shoulders, neck melting away as all the hair on his head fell out and his nose and ears pushed in and flattened. The hole on his former feet grew wider and wider, revealing the hollow insides of Jeff's body as his skin felt colder and rougher,

smooth flesh growing textured. The hole on his former feet grew wider and wider, revealing the hollow insides of Jeff's body as his skin felt colder and rougher, smooth flesh growing textured as it became cotton. The touch, the feel. Finally, Jeff's eyes closed

smoothing over into his cotton face. He could still somehow see but his vision was wide and angled and he could feel the bed beneath him and smell as if his senses were unaltered he felt himself moving along the bed as he shrank growing smaller and smaller

until finally he was an ordinary left sock lying in front of his bewildered father fuck how are you jerking off to that that doesn't make any sense at all how are you not jerking off to that? That doesn't make any sense at all. How are you not jerking off to that? Because I was expecting coming on hairy toes.

See, you don't know how to adapt. You don't know how to think and jerk on the fly. I get single-minded when I hear about hairy toes wiggling. Lemon, you're not turned on by the switch from hairy toes to Cronenberg body horror? You are in the minority, my friend. I love the options here. As horrible as it is, naturally, the first option is his dad puts him on. Because that makes sense. The second one is his dad goes to work.

That was weird. See you, son. His dad calls 911 is not in the list. Whoever in this room is brave enough to do his dad goes to work. Jimmy Franks. All right. Jeff makes a good sock. Jeff could not move or react in any way, despite how much he was struggling internally.

He was struck, looking upwards, looking into the hairy face of his confused father. His dad moved forward, reaching down. Jeff felt a quiver of pleasure rush through him as his dad's strong fingers stroked over his body.

Jeff, is that you? This can't be real. In a just and fair world it wouldn't be. The ground dropped out from under Jeff as he was picked up, dangling hopelessly in his dad's grip. He moved closer to the older man's face

who was still staring slack-jawed. A sudden insistent beeping made his dad blink and look away. Oh crap, I'm going to be late for work. That's what's going through your head right now. His dad looked back, biting his lower lip

and hesitating. The big man gulped. Look, I'm sorry about this, Jeff, but I'm in a rush. What am I doing? I'm talking to a sock. I'll make this up to you later, kid. Just try to deal with it for now. Unfortunately, socks aren't able to dial child protective services. Jeff was flopped helplessly onto the bed again

and could do nothing but watch as his dad grabbed the other identical sock, putting it over his wide, hairy foot and wiggling his toes. A little something for you there, Lemon. There we go. He would have screamed in protest if he could, but soon he was lifted and moved downwards, the massive shape of his dad's giant bare foot approaching as he felt his legs stretched open. Oh, my God.

His dad's toes pushed forward, penetrating his body. Oh, my God. The hard, warm thickness of his own father's foot pushing up deep inside. He felt himself stretched and molded, his shape conforming to his dad's flesh until he could feel the toes inside his head wiggling and making him

move. I feel like I should be offended, but it's just too silly. I really can't be. It's kind of bizarre to the point that it doesn't affect me anymore. Right, yeah. Jeff felt a heavy weight pressing down on him as his chest was pressed into the carpet. After the shock of being filled with his own dad's foot subsided,

he got the chance to fully experience what being a sock was like. Well, that was weird. Let's see what this is like. He adapted pretty quick to that. Time to live it up. He could feel the warm strength of the foot inside him, like his whole body was hugging it tightly, but he couldn't move at all. He could still see, but from a worm's eye view,

looking up into his dad's worried face far above, he could also still taste and smell. It was like his dad's toes were in his mouth, and the fleshy warmth of them was rubbing over his tongue. Levin, are you still with us? I don't know. He would have shivered if he could, but he was trapped, forced to taste his dad's

foot and breathe in the scent of the older man's musk as his sweat soaked slowly into Jeff's cotton body. You feel just like a normal sock, son. Hope I'm not hurting you in there. Then again, I clearly don't give a shit about your well-being, so...

Just give me the updated. What is going on? I can't believe this. Tim, you're comfy as hell. All right. I'm going to shrink all my children and turn them into socks. Jeff could not respond

and watched as his dad's work shoe approached, felt himself pushed into the warm darkness of the shoe, squeezed inside the musky leather, and resigned himself to his fate. With each step his dad took, Jeff felt a powerful pressure pressing down on him and release

a rhythmic compression that was oddly hypnotic. Jeff felt himself drift off, relaxed and strangely aroused, fulfilling him in the warmth and scent of his dad's sweat was calming and comforting. Jeff's revulsion gradually gave way to acceptance, then to pleasure. Really? Wow. It was a hot day outside, and Jeff's dad began to sweat, particularly in the uncomfortable leather shoes. Jeff's body grew heavy and wet, musky

heat filling him as he tasted the salty sweat from his dad's flesh. Suddenly, light flooded him, and Jeff felt the air blowing against his cotton body. It would have blinked for the sudden glare, but it seemed his new, wide-angled sight had no such troubles. Oh, so there's an upside. He was under his dad's desk.

He could see the shoes discarded to one side. His dad was sighing with relaxation. Sorry, son. I hope you're not having too rough a time down there. Just a few more hours and we'll be home, and I'll turn you right back. I promise. Sorry, I can't take an early lunch, but you know.

But then I'm going to turn you into a slap bracelet. Jeff mentally moaned with sudden pleasure as his dad stretched his toes and wiggled him. He watched as his father's hairy hands moved down towards him, fingers and thumbs pressing down against him. He felt his cotton form squeezed against his dad's skin as he gave himself a foot massage. And stroking Jeff's skin against the sweaty flesh.

Rub that cotton. It was bliss. Each stroke and press flushed Jeff with arousal and made his mind foggy and distracted. He didn't want this to end. Jeff barely noticed as the remaining hours of the day passed, spent the time in a happy dazed glow of enjoyment. The taste and touch and scent of the food inside him was wonderful and familiar.

Now Jeff had decided that being a sock for a day had been a pretty fun thing to do. Maybe he'd even ask his dad to do it again sometime. Okay, now it's important to note that there are no additional branches to the story. It ends here,

but some of the users have suggested some titles for new chapters. Have they? What are the suggestions? Well, there's Jeff Falls in Love with His Dad. Oh, God, sure? Well, there's Jeff falls in love with his dad. Oh, God, sure. Well, we have already fallen in love with him, so Jeff might as well.

With his dad's foot. Jeff turns back and wants to try being a different kind of clothing. Hey, Dad, can I be your thong? Does Jeff turns back in sweat and asks to give his dad a foot massage. Jeff's dad can't resist he wanks in the sock first. Just one more thing son.

That's fine. Take your time. This is a premise for a great sitcom Jeff's dad changes the wrong sock Into his son Oh that is good That is good Kill me

I shouldn't be And then Jeff's dad Forgets the change And falls asleep wearing him Oh now that's the sweet ending. What is that text? So anyway, Jeff's dad was sleeping, right? And Jeff was a sock.

And then he was still sleeping. And Jeff was a sock. We should invite the listeners to finish this story. We should, actually. I don't know if we need to hold another story. Let's just leave a footnote. Hey, alright. Oh, there he is. He's back. He's back.

This is the profile of Bonita Prime, and it's got a lot of pictures of Optimus Prime on it. It sure does. Not very good ones. They're all like the film version of Optimus Prime. I don't support my rights being used for this.

I believe that's her groping his foot. By the way, on the left side, there's just the sentence credit goes to Barger King and Hershey's M&M's as well. Thank you for your strength. Okay, so I am Benita Prime,

a fellow Optimus Prime lover and fan. Hi, thank you for visiting my DeviantArt account. I'm Benita Prime, one of thousands of fans who adore Optimus Prime. I think he is a very heroic character. I am a single mother of a lovely little boy and a mother figure

to several people online. Oh god. Again, this is the life I chose for myself. If you are curious about why the last name of Prime, I legally changed my last name when I left my former husband.

Yes. Yeah. So what happened with your ex? Well, let me tell you something. No, no, no. I divorced my husband because my husband was crazy. He was a... Well, he was a human, for one. I am not clamming

to be a Prime. It's just I choose, that's possessive, it's just I chose this name because Optimus Prime is my most favorite Transformer that I love and adore the most. And I like Prime better than Pax. Whoa. What?

I'm not sure either. The Penny Arcade Expo? I think so, yeah. I also say... Sorry, sorry, I think there's a rogue quotation mark in there. Yeah. Yeah, it's just there. It's a deceptive quotation mark.

I also say the I am not a Transformer, so is different for our kind. I say that that and people look at me quizzically. It's a last name to us, but a rank of the Transformer race. I am not trying to make myself

better to any other fan of Optimus Prime or Transformer fan or make myself a Prime. It's everyone's choice in the USA if you want to keep your contraction name or change it. This makes, possessive,

me think of what Optimus Prime said in the movie and the cartoon. Quote, Freedom is the right of all sentient beings. Quote. Please understand me. You can change your

contraction name also if you chose to from now on I'm John President I'm Boots Snowpants is that the highest Canadian rank? Snowpants? yeah I'm just going to change it to Pootie Tang.

I think that means you win. But anyways, I drive a truck. Moment. You drive a truck, huh? Okay. I'm in love with the robot oh yeah I drive a truck that's the weird part about me on my free time like the weekends

or before I head off to bed I draw artwork usually of Peterbilt style trucks or transformers I also draw houses as well I also make a lot of YouTube videos as well my handle there is 01MrsOptimusPrime. When you are there, please go take a look at my videos and let me know what you think of them.

And not to be redundant, but I adore Optimus Prime and always will. No one can change that! Not even a restraining order from Mr. Optimus Prime himself? No, our love knows no bounds. I think he is smart, witty, and very devoted to what he believes in. Witty, huh? If he was real, I'm fairly sure

he would love his fans. And have sex with his fans. No! I need to run. I have lots of things to do. Bonita Prime, signing off for now. Forward slash, carrot, carrot,

carrot, carrot, carrot, carrot. Vertical line, vertical line, underscore, underscore, underscore, underscore. By the way, if you couldn't tell from the ASCII art reading, that was in ASCII art, she drew out a truck and on it it says, Optimus Prime, my love. I feel like that was pretty obvious for my

reading, but I guess... I'm just clarifying, you know, some people are a little slow. Do you want to do a studio, or should we do the short pieces of burp fetish? Oh yeah, the short pieces of burp fetish. Burp fetish. You clearly can't handle this.

I really like that exchange between you two. Sorry, I got so excited I forgot how to speak. Should we do the short pieces of burp fetish? Oh, yeah, the short pieces of burp fetish. Of course. This is from a forum, so we're just going to go alphabetically from there. All right. Jack, you will take the opening post here by Rosie Jade Maiden

I'm sure she looks just like her picture 10 sentence fantasy here's a little game I just made up the rules are simple write an erotic burp fetish fantasy you've had in 10 sentences or less it doesn't have to be 18 plus

but this thread is posted here for those of us who want to get really adult of course let those gases fly, come on plus, but this thread is posted here for those of us who want to get really adult. Of course. Let those gases fly. Come on. Step two. You may have more than one fantasy per post as long as you do not exceed the sentence limit.

For instance, you can write five separate ones, which are ten sentences each, but you can't write 150 word one. You're bossy. I'd like to point out that 10 sentences could easily have 50 words.

I don't think her math has been... If you exceed the sentence limit, then you are out of the game. Step four, have fun! Alright! You had me till four. I assume you want to start out with this?

Yes, I will start out. Ian's tan and muscular boyfriend, James, blushes as he takes him into his arms. James had had far too much to eat again, but neither of them is complaining. Don't be shy, Ian purrs. The darking man, ah, the darker man moans as Ian gently pats his back.

His half-unbuttoned shirt exposes his dark and smooth stomach. The neighbor's stereo that has been throbbing against the apartment wall goes unnoticed for now. He groans lustfully as his belly gurgles. Finally, he belches loudly enough to be heard for the next ten miles. The man holding him grows hard and they crush their lips together.

Ow! Ow, ow, ow! Ow, ow, ow! They never learned how to kiss. They just sort of run at each other from opposite points in the room. Let's smash mouths. It's going to be a wonderful night. See, I get this picture of one of those Fabio-style romance novel covers, but the one guy who's standing up straight is just belching.

Jack Chick, do you have any affiliation? I'm sorry, Rosie Jade Maiden, do you have any affiliation? I am a proud member of the EBTGDMM. What does that mean? That, sir, is the estrogen brigade devoted to gassy death metal musicians, which then has bookend pictures of Nathan Explosion and Pickles the drummer. Yeah, that's actually about half of the members of this

community are that thing and they are people who not only write burp fetish but they specifically write burp fetish fiction about the guys from Metalopolis. Good. Quite a fetish.

Talk about a niche. Alright, Boots. I'm Sayaruka. Of course you're Sayaruka. Lucky bastard. Mom, Boots always gets to be Sayaruka. Now, hush up. You got to be Sayaruka last week. You know the rotation.

You got to wear that hoop skirt, too, didn't you? Didn't you? Jake lay on a couch with his shirt pulled up, one hand resting upon his trimmed stomach. Multiple crushed soda cans lay scattered around. The green-haired goth moaned softly in discomfort. His friend Hannah sat nearby watching. Let him out, bro.

That's how Goths talk. Come on, dude. Goths named Hannah. Yeah, that's how Goths named Hannah talk. Jake glanced at her, and a thunderous belch escaped him seconds later. Hannah grinned nervously, her panties dampening.

That's the grossest thing so far! Dampening! Dampening, yes. Jake smirked at her reaction and released another long one that seemed to penetrate her body to the core. Hannah bit her bottom lip and slipped a hand down her skirt,

rubbing at her crotch inconspicuously. What? Really? Inconspicuously. That's right. Look away! Don't notice this! Don't mind me! Squish, squish, squish, squish, squish. It's like wet squish! There's more where that came from, Jake

teased as he reached for another soda. The end. Oh, my. All right, John, bring it to us. Oh, all right. I get to be Sayurica now. Lindsay arched her back in ecstasy, fingers grasping at her boyfriend's hair as he ate her out. Oh, yes,

more, she panted. Chris flicked his tongue ruthlessly over her clit while pumping two fingers into her. You like? He asked teasingly. He paused to take another swig from his Dr. Pepper. Oh my god!

Oh shit, I know what happens next! Oh fuck. Okay, okay, let me prepare myself. Okay, okay, you ready, Lemon? Hold on, hold on, hold on. Like, two more seconds. Okay, okay. And felt a burst of air coming up his throat a moment later. Without bothering to cover his mouth, Chris burped as he continued to finger Lindsay. It was loud and piercing, causing Lindsay to gasp.

Pig, she said, giggling. Chris responded by withdrawing his fingers and giving Lindsay's pussy a few passionate licks. Before thrusting his tongue deep inside once more, he rubbed her clit and released a long belch. Just as he had planned, it made

Lindsay cum. just as he had planned and made Lindsay come. Lindsay hasn't been the same since Lobotomy. What really stands out to me is her product placement there. I just picture her fingering her and then just taking a moment. Wow, that's invigorating. I need to drink from a Dr. Pepper. Okay, it's my turn to take Rosie Jade Maiden.

Miss Jessica rests her hand on my puffy belly as I lean back in her dining room chair and asks if I am all right. I could not enjoy the meal she cooked because she must move to another city next week while I go to the local homeless shelter. Oh, well. It's hot. You get a little extra

soup if you burp. They can try to help me regain my memories, too. Oh, God, really? What? But they can't make the world less scary or give me that funny, flapping

feeling in my chest. Now, my stomach feels like there's a beach ball, and there's an embarrassing throbbing between my legs. What? Oh! What?

Oh! Miss! I whimper. Her face is a strawberry, strawberry literally as she gazes into my eyes time freezes finally she takes me into her warm and slick mouth

don't leave me miss I beg she slurps greedily and makes a funny broop noise that vibrates against my cock sorry the last

bit again she slurps greedily and makes a funny broop noise that vibrates against my cock. There we go. BOOP! I just like that she had ten sentences and she managed to get amnesia in there.

God's sake. Oh, Jack Chick, you get a haiku. Oh, I know, I'm so envious. Intimate thrusting, Jack Chick, you get a haiku. Oh, I know. I'm so envious. Intimate thrusting. Belching. Elks ecstasy. Erp. Erp.

Erp. Rapture. Rapture. Yeah. Damn. Yeah. Yeah. Damn. I like haiku because it's all about, you know, kind of condensing down and not using too many words.

What's the last line of your haiku? Erp, erp, erp. Is this me then? It is. I'm Scorpion with a K. Her blouse clung to her slender figure, and the sweat from a hard day at the office glistened on her forehead. Amongst this packed commuter train, she was the perfect candidate.

As with the others, he fixated on her stomach, imagining an air bubble slowly expanding. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat as her stomach slowly swelled. Okay. Sensing the limit had been reached before the pain was inflicted, he stopped the inflation. After five minutes of watching her squirm to try and dispel the unexplained bloating, it was time to give her release. At first she resisted, not wanting to cause a scene, but there was no getting away from it. After 30 seconds of inner torment, she let out the longest, loudest belt she had ever heard in her life. Oh, yeah. Oh, man.

He watched on, mobile phone in hand, recording every last beautiful second as she slumped back into her seat in utter bliss. Wow. So you're an inflation fetishist, but you're like, yeah, that's kind of my thing. But that's not really my major thing. I'm only an inflation fetishist as a means to an end, right? He's got a minor in inflation fetish. All right. Rosie Jane Maiden has given us two in a row here. Bunnybread, if you want to take the first one, please.

Yes, please. She's an overachiever. One! Here's a little belated Thanksgiving fun for the EBDG... Pickles the drummer mumbled incoherently and sloshed out on the hotel suite's couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's

whiskey in his hand. The room was far too small and simple for a star like him, but he didn't care as long as it got him away from his fucking family's house. This was how Thanksgiving should have been celebrated. Oh boy!

Oh boy! Gad, I must have had Gad, I must have had five pounds of turkey. Better wash it down with some more. He slurred, unzipping his pants. A lady cloquetteer, who was dressed in nothing but a lacy red skirt and tube top, sashayed in and straddled him, as she is wont to do. She lifted up her hood up just enough to reveal her bronze lipstick and part of a ponytail.

He could see that she had brown eyes beneath her hood too, albeit barely. Happy Thanksgiving, my lord! She murmured sexily. Now this she's some to be thankful for. Okay, two things. First of all, what the hell is a clocketeer? That would be a Death Clock.

Oh, a Death Clock fan. Okay. Yeah. Point number two. Bartender, can I please have some Jack Daniels brand whiskey? Again with the product placement. They're probably getting paid for this. Two.

Tyrone, what were you thinking? I told you what alcohol does to you, and yet you went out with those men anyway. They're not your friends. They just like seeing you make a fool of yourself. Scolded Jessica. The skinny young-man was too tipsy to listen. He almost fell, but she pulled him forward. She blushed with rage and embarrassment as he twirled around and somehow managed to face her. Miss Jessica! That was it! I'll'll show They told me Show That's slow Tyrone

Then explain your behavior now She snapped Really Really I'm fine I'm not fine Really funny He said I'm fine. I'm not fine. He said, his eyes glazed over and he moaned.

His pain touched her. She took off his shoes, helped him to bed, and cradled him in her arms. So, Rosie Jade Maiden, you are into both belching and coddling people who drank too much is that your she oh i think she lives at a frat house that's what it is mr franks Mr. Franks? That's Saikura again. Adrian stared down at the Japanese girl lying beneath him. She didn't speak a word of English, which would make teasing her all the more interesting.

Eh, Japanese loser. His own long black hair mingled with hers as he brought himself closer, her all the more interesting. Eh, Japanese loser. His own long black hair mingled with hers as he brought himself closer, gliding one hand down between her thighs. He slipped it into her silk panties, caressing her vulva with calloused fingers.

Oh. That's so pleasant. She trembles. I would tremble too if someone touched my vulva with that much fingers. What is that, burlap? Jesus Christ, what are you rubbing on me? Also, this may be past the concept of teasing.

There's such a tease when you jam your thumb up into my vulva. After enjoying her tiny moans and squirms when he violated her tender ear with his tongue, which had made him rock hard, the man belched into it. Holy shit!

It's hot. Wow. Well, I'm spent. But wait. I think we all are. The girl squirmed, and Adrian could feel her secretions leaking out. That's out of her ear. He swore. So hard to that blowback?

Wax is flying out? He punctured her eardrum. He smirked and wasted no time tearing her underwear away. Teary eyes locked with his as he readied to penetrate the virgin. Oh, no. Oh, no. With a throaty chuckle, he thrust into her. He kissed her forcefully as he began to fuck her.

And after breaking it, released a belch into her pretty face. The end. It's not rape. She doesn't know English. So it's okay. I will say, by the complete and total power of random, Jimmy Franks always ends up with the grossest shit.

It's pretty amazing. Jimmy, you have a gift. You've used it poorly so far. I think if this goes on, there's just going to be one podcast that it's just him and no one else reading like ifuckpoop.com or something. Take it, poop! Take it!

With a throaty chuckle. I'm the Ken Nordean of scat fetish porn. Wow, these still are... I mean, seriously, this whole thread is good. Like, you would think it kind of would wear out its welcome, but there's I'm sorry, it doesn't. I really

don't think it does. So, class of 2025, I'll keep this short so we can all get a stupid piece of paper that says, whoop-de-freaking-do, you graduated. Taking a deep breath, Megan sucked in some air and had the loudest belch of her life. Buh. Uh. Oh. graduated. Taking a deep breath, Megan sucked in some air and had the loudest belch of her life. That's kind of clever, saying belch while you belch.

That is all. Thank you. Then she sauntered off the stage and back to her seat. I wonder why Laura here has sort of fantasies about offending people at her school. It's almost like she was probably unpopular. Well, it's nice that she put her actual graduating year on there.

She's got a lot of school left. Yeah, she's a junior now, but she really Is going to plunk the shit out of this 14 short years That paper will be hers This is Rosie Jade Maiden again

Or Tyrone She's also got Mandango fever Trust me Ty Tyrone. This will get rid of that throbbing you can't tell Jessica about. I said as I pinned him to the bed. Within minutes

I'm riding him and he's belching with each thrust. He clutches my hips. He's belching with each thrust. He threw up seven times already. In fact, he did, but I'm going to keep going. Oh, my God. Please, can I continue my story?

I'm sorry. He clutches my hips and stares at me with stunned bunny eyes. He's either a virgin or he's also lost the memory of sex. I can't believe my stupid twin fell for an amnesiac. You have a lot of fetishes, lady. I fucked him into brain damage. Well, he is a sexy little fucker, and I know he wants Jessica.

It isn't fair. She got everything and I got nothing. I got nothing, that is, except the opportunity to corrupt the gassy motherfucker in my twin sister's bed. Revenge is sweet. That one was weird. It kind of fell apart in the back.

That one isolated was a little weird. I feel really fucking dirty about that one. Well, you take it out of context, it'll seem weird, sure. The lamestream media. Well, she couldn't even remember the last time she had burped. I hope it works! But even if it doesn't, it was still worth a shot, she said,

before she took the pill from my hand and chased it with a cup of water. A short while later, she placed her hand on her stomach. It feels so weird, she remarked as the pill began to dissolve, releasing air like an Alka-Seltzer tablet. Oh, by the way, buy Alka-Seltzer. Again! Again! Oh, holy shit. Her stomach rumbled as the gas continued to build. She opened her mouth to prepare for the burp and strayed as nothing came out.

Just relax, I told her. There will have to come out eventually. I soon caught the focused look in her eyes as a bubble swelled in her chest and rose to her throat. Her relaxed jaw gently fell open as a small burp slowly pushed its way out. Her herp. She gleamed at me with pride as we both knew this was the start of what would become a very memorable evening. What happened next? I came

Oh, right It was a memorable come Oh, uh, I believe it's Yeah, Jimmy Franks? Oh, yeah! I'm not at all bored of this in any way Are you? Am I alone in this? Like, why am I in this?

Is this any funny? We need more Jimmy Franks sickness. Oh my god! I just read ahead and it totally... Your curse is working. Yeah! This is sort of the Casablanca of belch fetish. You must remember this.

Grrr! Yeah! Well, we'll always have... All right, Mr. Sinha, you found my diary. So just tell me what will keep you quiet. Do you want that merger with my company? Spit it out, she snapped. Sanjay Sinja chuckled.

He was a muscular young Indian man with pine green eyes, a tight and round ass, and shiny jet black hair. Tut, tut, tut, Miss O'Neil, he replied. Do you really think I would blackmail you? My heavens, no. I'd much rather make that little fantasy you wrote down come true, he murmured seductively. She strode toward her office's door indignantly, but he intercepted her and circled her like a lion on the prowl.

Rowr! She shouldn't scream for security or slap him, but her body was deaf to reason. She moaned helplessly as he groped her right breast with one hand and slid another up her skirt. That is how lions fuck. Yes. Well, lions with skirts.

Can you feel the love tonight? Ah, you look so good when you're being stubborn, but you'd look even better on your knees. You want that, don't you? You want to be on your knees listening to my muscular belly growling after I drank too much and a belch is threatening to erupt out of me.

You want my cock in your mouth, don't you? Don't you? Oh, Mr. Fenimore! Suddenly, he left out a deep groop against her neck. She yelped and surrendered to his

touch. Oh no, rape fantasy! This isn't good, belch. Oh no, that's fine now. I am FFC1234. Brad invited a girl that he had met on the BFF. They had been talking

for a while and realized they both loved to get off on the opposite sex burping. The girl, Lauren, walked into Brad's house to find him naked in front of the computer screen, watching Biancola's blowjob burping videos.

Oh, that's bad. That's a tongue twister. Wait, is this something that really exists? Of course. Don't put that in the Google. I'm sure you're familiar with Biancola's burping blowjob videos. Oh my god, sorry, Brad said, thinking she wouldn't be there yet.

Here yet. Lauren looked really happy, though. That's so hot. I can do better than her, though. This is going to be so naughty. She leant over his shoulder and started stroking his cock and burped in his

ear! A burp! A burp that made her body vibrate and made Brad moan with pleasure. These two both knew what each other wanted and were both terrific burpers. Keep going. Keep going. Sorry. Sorry. You must keep going okay they both were burping

seductively at each other then into each other's mouths oh my god Lauren Brad went down on Lauren while burping loudly till she came. Then Lauren, okay, so then Lauren,

he teased Brad's cock, licking it up and down, and burping and moaning. She started sucking her lips slowly down his hard cock. Brad was about to come. Then came up a burp from Lauren that lasted five seconds. Brad felt the vibration on his cock, and he came in her mouth during the burp.

Did I emphasize directly the hot parts of that story? Oh my god. You acted like there were some cool parts, baby. I'm just trying to picture them making bed rude byes and burping at each other I don't understand why that would be tough to imagine another season

another reason burp alright and last up I forget how the alphabet works It goes back to Jack Jack Alrighty Alright, we come full circle Andy was bored of looking up

porn on his computer when he came across a website that had lots of videos of girls burping aimed at people with a burp fetish That's strange he thought, I never knew people got videos of girls burping aimed at people with a burp fetish. That's strange, he thought. I never knew people got turned on by this. He decided to have a look at a video

to see what it was all about. In the video, a girl was in her bra and panty. That's bra and panties. Doing huge burp after burp while rubbing her body and licking her lips. Andy was

wondering why he was enjoying this. He never knew just how raunchy burping was. The sound of her burps made him really horny. How does this happen? Okay, sorry. Well, you get bored looking at porn on your computer when you come across a website

that has lots of videos of girls burping aimed at people with a burp fetish. You're absolutely right. I thought we fucking covered this lemon. I'm sorry. I was focused on something else. I'm not going to tell you what it was, though. Okay.

His erection grew and it made me feel like he was doing something bad, which made him even more turned on. Did you feel? No, no, no, wait. I had a suspension of disbelief going on there. I think this is just a journal entry.

Burping is considered rude. Especially by girls. Which made him feel naughty for getting aroused by it. He just went with it, stroking hard every time she burped, until letting go midway

through a monster burp. It was his best orgasm he'd ever had. He sat there feeling relaxed. This really was just a journal entry, wasn't it? This isn't fan fiction at all. I'm pretty sure all of these are journal entries, including the Vancouver one. Alka-Seltzer, plop, plop, fizz, fizz.

Oh, what a relief it is, plop, plop, fizz, fizz. And there we go. Roundabout an hour of the things you wanted to hear. John, what do you think we learned this week? I learned that I love it when we get reader submissions. Because, you know, when we're looking for stuff and when we're mining for stuff, we kind of have the eye of, like, you know, what's the theme? What stuff can we get together? What, you know, kind of with a predetermined idea or at least a predetermined form.

Like, we want to find this big forum or this big blog, et cetera, et cetera. But I love when we just get these bits and pieces of the internet here. And just get that good range of like, hey, here's the thing I found. Here's the thing I found. It's like, ah, just this whole, just is kind of substrata of messed up internet. Yeah, yeah, because I mean, there are sites that we've personally mined and have rejected offhand, because

it's like, well, this one thread's funny, but there's nothing else here, so fuck it. And then we realize, oh wait, we're not really, the theme is less important than actually finding funny stuff. And speaking of people finding funny stuff, I want to thank for the first section on dudes turning into socks

and being worn by their fathers, I want to thank Montrith for that one. Thank you. For the story on the lady who's really into Optimus Prime, I want to thank Komasama. Thank you. And for the burp fetish,

I want to thank John Mollich. Thank you. A fellow John. We know our stuff. Exactly. I'm sure I mispronounced all three of those names, and I apologize for it. But thanks for giving those to us. And on that topic, I want to also thank you for, I've seen a lot more comments on the posts on the actual F Plus site.

A lot of commentary, a lot of people talking about things. Thanks for that, and keep the talks, keep the discussions going. It's nice to see feedback when you make a thing. Especially when you're yelling horrible internet stuff to the void. It's like, please, somebody, please be listening to this.

And I want to thank you, John, for being the guy that says that at the end of the podcast. Oh, you're welcome website's thefbl.us we'll see you later so web geek web geek 456 uh posted on the Burp Fetish forums, and he wrote a story about a burper girl, like gender transformation. Right? Right now, of course.

So yeah, so he wrote a story that contains both burping and gender transformation. Yeah, so he wrote a story that contains both burping and gender transformation. And then every post and response is, Dude, what the fuck? Gender transformation? You fucking ew, weirdo. WTF? Dude, if anything, this should go under other fetishes. Turning into a chick isn't a main fetish here,

and seeing that this is your second or third post of this nature, I'm thinking that you'd like to turn into a girl more than being into burping. I thought you said in the blood oath, man. Or it could be that it's not a fetish at all, if you identify as a transgender or transsexual. You did not just say that. Regardless, irrelevant thread is irrelevant.

Ugh. Ugh. I just want to say that I'm more disgusted by that internet speak than anything else we've done. Same here.