The F Plus - 91: Boy You Fellas Sure Hate Frenulums

Episode Date: January 1, 2013

There's around 7 billion living human bodies on this Earth, and while there's some general variance between them, you'll find a lot of similarities. And the members of bodymod.org finds this all dreadfully boring. Theirs is a place where people can gather to discuss doing terrible things to their flesh with other people who won't try to talk them out of it. This week, you're gonna wish we had anesthetic.

God, this is so Australian. This is Paul Hogan. That's not a knife. This is a knife. There you go. Hey there. stinks on its breath. A needle, that's all. Nothing of its health remains. The needle gets a pock. Hey there, this is the F Plus Podcast. Terrible things, rid of enthusiasm.

My name's Lemon. I'm Boots Reingear. Hey Boots, what are you up to this week? Faking an interest in this week's topic. Okay, well, please proceed. Oh yeah, recently I've totally taken to body modification. Have you now? Yeah, yeah. What an interesting story.

Yes. Yeah, all sorts of things I want to change about myself. I'm going to make my nose upside down. I'm going to make my knees bend backwards. Good. Well, as it happens, the exact thing that you're interested in is the topic of our episode tonight. Oh, that's amazing. That is an amazing coincidence.

There's a website called bodymods.org where people who are fans of sort of extreme body modification, you know, like the many, many piercings and the sort of scalping techniques and all the branding. I think maybe more so people who are fond of the idea of extreme body modification. Yeah, so these people all gather and they

discuss things that they want to do to their body. Yeah, their genitals. Well, yeah. They discuss things that they want to do to their body. Yeah. Their genitals. Well, yeah. I mean, for our purposes. Right. As far as we're concerned.

So if you're thinking to yourself, I got my podcast subscriptions. I've got my on the media. I've got my maybe you listen to your WTF, and you're thinking to yourself, boy, I really wish I had a podcast where I could just sit down and listen to genital mutilation for a good, like, hour or so. You, my friend, are in luck.

Indeed. Readers, assemble! Ringing in his ears, an anthem of fear, of pain and of death, and of nothing that's left, nothing of himself remains! The Flash kills the Pug! In the room tonight we have

Stog. I gave myself a body mod of a third arm, and all I needed was plutonium. Kumquats up! I got the logo for Video Games Live tattooed on my shin. Boots ring gear! I'm gonna replace my nipples with navels.

Bunny bread. I was thinking of replacing my entire head with that of a mannequin's. Any thoughts? And lemon. I am a steampunk! So we're going to start out. Stog, if you will take the role of Pixie Pickles. And So we're going to start out. Stog, if you will take the role of Pixie Pickles. And you have a question for us? Me, right?

Stog. Sorry, I was... You're the one who is Stog. I am the one who is Stog, yes. Yeah, that too. Which one am I reading? You're Pixie Pickles. Pixie Pickles, please. Yeah, you also have a nickname, I think

Maybe you should talk about that at some point Pixie Pick Liz Well, you know, Pixie Pickles is her Christian name She does have a nickname, which we'll get into a little bit later Anyway, so what was your question? Would you let your partner pierce you? Okay.

Subject, would you let your partner pierce you? White eyes. Like a dog. Okay, so would you let your partner pierce you? Wait, what's your question? I forget. Hey, it's Joey three times. How you doing? How you times. How you doing?

How you doing? How you doing? If they told you that they know what they're doing, would you trust them? And if so, would you be mad at them if they fuked it up? Edited to remove event status by Pixie Cuntcake Pickles. I'm sorry, what was your name again? Cuntcake. That's adorable.

Little cuntcake. So you're a baker? You know, they call a cunt a cake, and then I just put the two together, and that's how I got my nickname. Sure, that makes sense. Bootsy, you're Rouslan? I'm Rouslan. Sorry, I don't have a partner. I'm divorcing.

Yay! Oh, sad and then happy. Congratulations. Well, PixieCuntCakePickles has a response. Well, that's interesting I got my nipple done by my At the time partner He had told me he

Used to do piercings and all that So I trusted him I could bottom A guide to piercings book With all the info you would ever Need to know So he's a professional Piercer but you bought him the idiot's guide to piercing? Nothing insulting here, honey.

I know you're a doctor and a successful surgeon, but I got you. I'm sure you know what you're doing, but I bought you this little handbook. book. When it came to broken URL, piercing time, my sister was with me and we were set to go. He went in for the prick. Then he looked

right into my eyes and said, uh, it won't go in. Then I just said... What do you think he was trying to pierce? Well, her nipple. She got her nipple done by her at-the-time partner.

Oh, it was nipple. It was nipple. Yeah. So she just has really, really, really, really stiff nipples. Yeah, just rigid nipples. That should be her nickname. Well, she already has cunt cake. She doesn't want any of that.

Stiff cunt cake nipples. Then I said, just censor do it! So rather than keep on pushing, he then pulls it out! Ooh, wide eyes! And then does it again! Okay.

Leaving me with two holes on one set and one where it came through. Does that sound like a person that knows what they're doing? He made a wormhole in your nipple? Yeah, pretty awesome. You can go to the Gamma Quadrant through it. His reasons were the broken URL

needle wasn't sharp enough, white eyes. How many piercing needles are unsharp? I don't know what happened. That's the answer to him. That's the correct one. Funny thing was

it was my sister that almost fainted. Not me, naughty! That's less funny than the fact that your tits are all mangled. She had to look at him, you were staring at the ceiling. Gave him the another chance. Really, did you? Well, third time's a charm!

You already fucked that nipple up, you might as well go again. Didn't even read my helpful book. My Medusa piercing cut it... So...so...so... Well, you fucked up the nipple, let's give him my face. Cut it short. During he dropped the needle and the ball. Got me to hold the clamp so he could find it.

And pierced it crooked. Mad face. Off center and on the wrong angle. Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Would this then be the time to change your piercer? Or your partner? Heh, heh, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Would this then be the time to change your piercer or your partner? Heh heh heh heh heh. My husband isn't a piercer and only done his own. But I trust him and love him 666% and am letting him do the other.

Even without the piercing guidebook. Well, I'm glad that you're clearly a woman that has learned from your mistakes. You just keep knowing and growing, don't you? This is how I put my name on job applications. Pixie Guncake Pickles. How's the job search going, Pixie? Not good. All right. Kumquat. How's the job search going, Pixie? Not good.

Alright, Kumquat, you're looking for something, right? I'm looking for a lot of things, but... But one thing specifically comes to your mind on March 15th of this year. I've always wanted tattoo penis cover-up. Sure. I've always wanted tattoo penis cover up sure makes sense strap some medical tape around it

my name is Alstatu oh you're Egyptian I am looking for experienced tattoo southern or central valley calicornia area. Come on down to calicornia.

We are the greatest of everything. Yeah, it's three colored corn. To cover up my flame tattoo on cock penis. Cock penis? So he has a tattoo on his penis of flames on a cock. I thought it would make my penis go faster, but it didn't.

It was a helpful reminder to use a condom very often. Say, this could be you. Well, I mean, it could be like a rooster on fire. That's true. That would make sense, too. Sure. Sure. I'm a big University of South Carolina fan.

So a flame tattoo on a cock as a tattoo on your penis, you don't like that. Do you have a better idea, something you'd like to cover it up with? I am thinking of mermaid biker chap fin. Email I will send pics. Oh, you are emailed. Yeah, because I really want to know what a mermaid biker chap fin looks like. Okay, so let's get into more proper body modification. My name is ha-ha-ha-ha-1-1-1-1-8-2-3, or 1-1-1-8- one, one, one, one, eight, two, three, or one, one, one,

eight, two, three. Sorry. Ha ha ha. I accidentally gave you the wrong number. My topic is elf ears. Would putting very small elastics on the tip of my ears every night eventually give me elf ears? Yep.

That's how it was done. J.R.R. Tolkien did that. And it was done. J.R.R. Tolkien did that, and then uh, yeah. Uh, Boots, uh, King of Short Pants? Actually, it's King Short Pants. Oh, yeah. His last name is Short Pants.

I'm King Short Pants. You look like a prick from your avatar. I really doubt it. Some of the people who get them cut and sewn have had it redone because the ear won't stay in the pointed shape. Which applies to you. And then, Bunny Brady, you're Ink Lizard. Ink Lizard.

Oh, there we go. Ink Lizard. What's up, man? Oh, I'm Ink Lizard. Ink Lizard? So, like, cut and stitched would be best. A little elastic sounds kind of like the oriental art of foot binding. And at that, it takes a long time started at birth.

I have raised a great many Chinese girls in the 17th century. Yeah, sure. I agree, cut and stitch. I only want one ear done, but afraid to look like SPARK! So, I want to give myself one pointed elf ear. Yeah, or else you'll look stupid. But I'm worried I'll look stupid.

I don't want to look like Spock. I want to look like a shithead. There's a difference. Oh. We'll just go by King Short Pants picture, and you know. Okay. Boots, you know. Okay. Boots, you had a concern. Is that right? A concern that you wanted to share?

Yeah, yeah. It's really important to me. It's dear to my heart. Okay. I want everybody to speak to their families and their children about this before I look at what it is. Yeah, well, we're all here to help. Okay, and I just want to talk about Skin Pocket.

Sure. Skin Pocket. Everybody, you know, you all hear about Skin Pocket. Have you talked to your children about Skin Pocket? And I just have this thing to say. Skin Pocket. A pocket just like a normal pocket in your pants

but in your skin. Skin pocket! Would it be possible to make an open wound that would heal forming a pocket? Or, would you have to have a linner implanted? Something along the lines

of a pocket protector. Oh, shit. What? What type of material could be used? Where could it be safely located? And how would it be implanted? I, personal, not doing much research, was thinking of a rubber silicone shaped like a pocket proteter

being implanted with a pocketing procedure at the top of my forearm. That is the best idea. That's why I want to keep pens forever, yeah. You need government funding for this. This has to happen. Kind of out there, but a bit of a dream I have. Any help and input is much appreciated.

Bunnybread Veilside wants to help. Veilside. Veilside. He has an avatar where he's, I guess, picking the zits off his face. I am wistfully staring at God while snapping my fingers. I'm not really sure. Well, hey there, fella.

I'm Veilside. That wasn't really a pocket in the usable sense. It was just a wound he was playing with. Yep. in the usable sense. It was just a wound he was playing with. Yep, for a functional one, you'd probably need a material to line the pocket. Obviously, it'd need to be something that the body doesn't automatically want to reject. Like my dick. Silicone wouldn't work. Silicone would work. I beg to differ. What?

What? Silicone could work, but it'd need a coating that makes the body more likely to accept it. Something along these lines, wherever the hell that goes. But that coating is closer to bones, not normal tissue. So a new one would need to be devised. It'd also need to be tough. You wouldn't want it to break. It'd also need to be tough. You wouldn't want it to break. But the surrounding tissue would also need to be able to resist whatever forces they'd

be subjected to by whatever you put in the pocket. So no, you probably won't be seeing something like this shit for a decade or so, idiot. God damn it, scientists! Get on this! What are you working on, cancer? Fuck that. Hey, wait a second. Ooh, Cancer Pocket.

This post was more than three years ago, so it's only seven years away from Skin Pocket. Oh, okay, okay. I think I can wait. I think I can wait. Veil site is from the future. Don't worry, guys. Just around the corner. Skin Pocket. Skin Pocket 2019.

And this is just fun. That one chick has a response. It doesn't really matter, but I just like the sentence because it's a sentence that would only exist in this forum, which is, necrosis came to mind for me, too, for the reasons that Eaton just said. Does she have frog legs jumping out of her neck? What is that?

Maybe. You can click on it for... Oh, Jesus. Yeah, don't click on that. You have some facial hair, lady. You should probably modify that facial hair. No, she actually had that implanted. She had a smooth face before this.

Okay, in that case, it's pretty hot. Kumquat, you had another body modification thought? Something that you wanted to do to yourself? Hello. Hello. My name is Titanium Teeth. Are you a Bond villain? Oh, so it is.

You're 7'3". What are you going to talk to us about? What do you want to do, titanium teeth? I have a topic for you. What is it? I can't guess. The topic is titanium teeth. Oh, no way.

Hello. Hi. Hi. Hi there. I'm new in this forum. Yeah. I'm from Spain. Maybe my English is not perfect.

I am 25, and I am male, and I doesn't have body modifications for the moment. So far, your English is the best. Yeah, absolutely. I haven't misspelled a word all sentence. Yeah, you're not gonna fit in here, titanium teeth. Just piss off. I was wondering

if it's possible to replace the teeth with a titanium teeth. Oh, no. Sure. Stog, don't poo-poo this just yet. The teeth? Yeah. It could be like the current gold implants, but with titanium! Oh, I got you now.

I can picture it now, yeah. I'm right there with you. I'm not referring to the current implants with ceramic pieces I mean a teeth with only titanium pieces sure I think I understand why is there like four more paragraphs

did you see Moonraker? James Bond movie? Jaws had something like this the shark? the guy's name was Jaws had something like this? The shark? What? No, no. The guy's name was Jaws. Yes, I know.

I want it with nice teeth, the same shape, then natural teeth, not something robotic. Jaws was a robot. I'm not sure you thought this through. I don't want to look weird. I don't want it to look metal or anything. I want it to look like a Bond villain, but not, you know, creepy. Just picking up classic Rock Radio Station wherever you want. Every time you choose, bong, bong. I'm sorry, you had more to tell us?

Yeah, I'm not following what he wants to do with his teeth. Yeah, I'm not really sure. Apparently you have to keep reading here. It's possible to do this? Do you know if someone has this modification, does titanium teeth have advantages over natural teeth? Maybe it could be stronger, cleaner, less problem with caries. Also, every tooth could have a perfect size, position, shape.

My current mouth are far from perfect. I have my many mouths. Oh, just shit. You should look at my garage of mouths. First of all, it's not full of titanium. Dentist just looking, slack jaw in his mouth. I'd like to do something about this but I guess I'd just have to replace everything with titanium

Also it is important to know if a titanium teeth needs visiting the dentist periodically I would prefer to have it and forgot all the problems of the natural teeth and get rid of the dentist visits So you just don't brush your teeth Is that it? and forgot all the problems of the natural teeth and get rid of the dentist visits.

So, really, you just got, yeah, you just don't brush your teeth, dipshit. Is that it? His primary motivation is life. It's that I hate brushing my teeth. There's nothing else that drives him. Can you imagine to be able to open a bottle with your own mouth without bottle opener and without risk for your teeth? Oh, this is how he's wrecked his mouth.

Okay, not even the teeth brushing thing. All right. Hey, Timmy, do your trick again. Oh, okay. My gums are bleeding, but okay. Or being able to eat Sweet product Without problems of caries Do you think that's how

Cavities is spelled? Without problems of Getting pig's blood Dumped on you At the end of prom Sure that makes sense Or Eat nuts

Opening them With your own mouth Without damaging your teeth Brittle teeth? It would be great, but I must to know the problems that could have this body modification. Sure. I know that this could be

difficult, expensive, and not reversible. I should be sure before doing this crazy modification. I should ask the fucking internet. Yeah, I should ask this place. You guys seem solid. Boots, hate is man. Hate is man.

Hey, here's a surprise. Here's a surprise, guys. Hate is man likes cannibal corpse. What? No shit. Hey, guys. I'm hate is man. You don't sound hateful enough.

Oh, I am. Okay. I just got back from the goat horror concert. Okay. I can feel the hate. Anyway, anyway, you'd still have to brush them because everything in your mouth gets coated in plaque. Oh. If I actually thought about this too, seems like a good idea.

Yeah, that did sound like a cannibal corpse. All right. Ask me how to grow your free neck beard. thought about this too. Seems like a good idea. Sure does. Ask me how to grow your free neck beard. And titanium teeth has a response there. Yes! I should brush teeth to have my mouth clean. Wait, now we're back where we started. Wasn't that the point

of the titanium teeth in the first fucking place? Okay. Here's another good idea. My name is nov-cole- Sure. Hey. You're your novice colon schooler.

That's true. That is true. Thank you for figuring out my name. Okay, so this is my only post in BodyMod.org. Yelling face! Hey, I'm new to the whole BodyMod thing, but wanting to get into it. Just wondering, does anyone know about putting electronics into or under the skin? I was thinking maybe having mini-triggers implanted in my thigh.

Triggers, triggers. I'm sorry. Mini-triggers implanted into my thigh. But my bees start small with a simple blinking LED. Good idea. What are the dangers of running small voltages throughout the body under the skin? Quick, I want to be like Daft Punk immediately. Come on.

Oh, shit. I want to put a small LED light on the back of my head so I can annoy every fucking person that's behind me. Dumber, uglier, stupider. There's two red lights in my nasal cavity. They blink every Christmas. Are you having a very vibrant nosebleed? Oh, I see. I'm trying to see if anyone has a good response.

Everyone genuinely is like, oh, it's a great idea. Yeah, go ahead. Royalty for me on the second page. In vivo is a really good one Okay, take it I've done research on this And it can be done easily Power is not a prob

Think of pacemakers There are loads of interesting things available Just need a good person to get the stuff in Where's a crankless sad Wanted person to get the stuff in Get stuff put in her. I want someone to dig LED lights into my skin, and I want it for under $100.

Guy who put stuff in my body. A thousand responses. Wait, no, that's not what I meant. Just quit replying. All right, I'm taking down the ad. Fuck this. On the second page, Bunny Bread, if you'll take Vox Player. Vox Player.

Vox Player. Oh, there he is. Okay. I always thought it'd be cool to get an implant that vibrates or something to let me know when my phone is ringing. Sure. Yeah, that's a great idea. I don't keep on my body, but I could run back home to go get the phone.

No way. No. I can never hear or feel that damn thing. When I think about it, I envision all my snorty-ass friends calling me late at night or some shit. Those assholes.

I was calling your dick phone. He met his dick, right? My name is Dready Roots. Hey, Dready Roots. Well, that's the actal health involved, but I was thunkin' more the whole truckin' and idinness issue. Look around you.

I want Eva go under the knife, given the option. I don't even have an ATM or credit card. The only way they see letter C, me now, is in my home stead. I.e. then net, dish TV,

landline, phone. Oh my god. But once I'm out on the road, they can't track me with no cell phone or CC card. We're all fucked now. Yeah, we are.

Dreadiruse has a total of seven mods. Presumably one must be in his brain. I'm sorry, Dreadiruce, you had another response in this exact same thread that you wanted to share? I did. Yeah. Man, I don't

even want to hear about people actually asking for chips or anything electronic to let her be insterted into them. Yeah, I don't want to hear about that either. I've always heard about that.

Call me perinoid, but once we start asking for it, it will make it all that much easier for them to chip us all. This is a simple, very simple question this dog has for us

Simple question this dog wants to share I feel like we've talked about this already Don't laugh Simple question Not even a question, really Haven't we discussed this topic before in an episode? Maybe Hi, my name is Feet Girl.

Hey, Feet Girl, what's up? You must really like feet. Foot amputation. Oh. Foot amputation. Any thoughts? Pro or con? It's just something I think about sometimes.

Not sure if or when I would do it. Just a thought for now. Okay. Like, waited four minutes and like, maybe I need to flesh this out. It's a thing I thought about. I think she just had to add a footnote.

Oh, thank you. Jesus Christ. Toast wasn't here for a reason. Will you be my feet boy? We're here for a reason. Will you be my feet boy? Bunny bread. At the bottom of the page, you're Wurda.

Wurda. Wurda. Hello, I'm Wurda. Foot amputations are cute. Yeah. Just little bitty nubby whoopies. If I had the chance, I would amputate my left foot because... Because.

I don't feel I need to explain this any further. Siamese amputation. Wait, why do you not have the chance now? Oh, yeah. Who's taking that chance from you? Is it Obama? Yes. Obama already amputated my left foot, didn't give me the chance.

Sounds maybe weird for most of the people, but they are very cute to me. Love them. Send pics. And then just specifically a response to Nella Leah. Oh, yeah. Nella Leah. Maybe I want not to be able to do some things anymore. I have

no idea where I started with that. But I will be able to do a lot of other things like stepping out of bed with a left foot stump or swimming with one foot. Yeah sure. Now I'm ashamed because of the left foot. What? sure. Now I'm ashamed because of the left foot.

What? What the fuck is happening with your body? I don't understand. I was involved in a Daniel Day-Lewis movie from a long time ago, and I'm ashamed. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you're going to need to have your brain removed first. Ooh, any thoughts? Brain removal?

Amnesia. Second page, dog. Feet girl. Hi, I'm feet Second page, dog. Feet girl. Hi, I'm feet girl again. Hey. And I want my feet amputated at or just an inch above my ankles. Sure. I'm still trying to decide if or when I will ever do it for real.

What do you mean if? Get to it. I just may start small with a toe amputation. Just see if you like it. Literally dipping her toe into body modification. It takes me a long time to make up my mind sometimes. Sure, yeah, I bet. Werner, you have a response to that? Yes, I do.

That's a nice choice. At the enclave is a good level for a foot slash feet amputation. Even I prefer through the enclave on sleigh. How should I be pronouncing that? Even I prefer... On sleigh, I think ansel. Ansel, ansel.

That's absolutely right. Yes, of course. Even I prefer through the ansel. I don't know how to start small. Looks logic. But I don't like an amputated toe. I prefer a foot stump. I would finnally accept my body. I dream from time to time about being a foot amputee.

I would love to walk with crutches. But everything is stopping me right now just walking with crutches. Instead, I better chop my foot off. That seems a lot less drastic. I see myself as somebody with a left foot stump. And not somebody with such a huge head!

I don't have a date yet, too, but I know sooner or later. Everybody need to decide it for themselves. I just recommend you to keep it safe. If you make the step, let a

professional doctor do it. Because they're going to be gung-ho about this. Go in and see the doctor. Hey, doc. Yeah, do me a favor. Do other people have some experience with amputations but are not surgeons? doc. Yeah, do me a favor. Two other people have some experience with amputations but are not surgeons.

All of them have a fantasy about cutting off a woman's feet and just really want my feet after they have been cut off. What? Oh dear. So you're going to donate your This wasn't even your fantasy. This is just, hey, you know what?

I'd really like to jerk off to you. I don't know why you're distressed. It's a congruence of fetishes. This person wants to not have a foot, and that person just wants to have a foot just to love and cherish independently. Fix! That's the way I look to myself.

Psychological my foot is already gone. Only fiscal. Only fiscal. Only financially, it's still there. She was trying to spell fiscal. Ficycle. Only bicycle, it's still there. Anyway, the girl in the picture should be very proud of her body. I'm very jaleous.

I'm very gelatin. Don't very Jaleus. I'm very gelatin. Don't be jelaggy. Alright, I'm Pierce Kelt and I have a word of caution. Okay, let's put some sanity in this. By discussing your ideas here, you've given the insurance companies all the ammo it needs not to pay out, i.e.

logged IP addresses and everything you've written. What? What? What? This is the only problem I see with your brilliant plan. Please don't take this as a criticism, as it's meant to be. Best of luck in your endeavor! Oh, thank god we don't have to pay off the crazy lady

who cut off her own foot. I had no idea that body modification fanatics were such big government wackos. Pierce Kelt is a lawyer. My foot got sawed off at my job. I'm a stenographer. I'm a reader at Walmart.

Yeah. Wait, no, that's... You know what? Honestly, now that I think about that, that's kind of believable. Well, hang on. I need to visit every website you've ever been to, and then we'll take up a payment. Oh, yeah. So what online handles do you use?

Well, there's Pierce Kelt on bodymod.org. Oh, that's it. Someone ran over my foot with a wheelchair made out of razor blades. Oh, we've been getting a lot of that. Yeah, please have a seat next to the other guy. About 700 times.

Alright, Bunnybread, this one's up to you. I'm going to show you a thread with two posts that are worth reading. And would you like to be Mr. 21 or Yagstein? Do I have to look at them first or should I just base it on the names?

You can look at it first. Oh, okay. Whew. Boy. Oh, choose quick. Go with your heart. first. Oh, okay. Ooh, boy. Oh, choose quick. Go with your heart. Jagstein, please. You want to go Jagstein.

All right. Then I'm Mr. 21. Hey, guys! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! So I've been depressed lately, but I'm feeling pretty good.

Hey! Because I just had the best idea, and I've just been pumped all day. Okay. Hey! Hey! I'm looking to cut the frenum on my dick. Oh, no! The frenum?

The frenum. Yeah. I'm looking into cutting the frenum on my dick so I can pull the foreskin back all the way. Sure. Is there an easy and at the same time safe way to do it yourself? Wait, wait. Is there an easy and safe way to do it yourself without going to the doctor? Well, yes and yes.

If so, share. I'm up for anything as long as it's safe. Because I'm all about safety. That's why I'm here. I'm gonna cut the frenum of my dick. Yay! The frenum.

So, um, you're on next time. So, I'm Jack Stein. So I will describe my method times as I remove my frenulum. Oh good. Oh good. Jesus. Everyone must of course know what he wants.

The frenulum prep-he-he-he removes frenu-lactomy. I can only- Frenu-lactomy. Frenu-lactomy, I can only recommend. The advantages are what? The foreskin can move further back. It is a major hub for the possible and masturbation. The foreskin is moving. I think masturbation falls within the realm of the impossible.

I'm imagining, you know the one Muppet that's like a full body suit? He walks around. Oh, tiny. And now he's cutting his own penis. Oh yeah, the one where the mouth descends like a drawbridge or something. Okay. Two, the penis looks better because the foreskin folds almost pull it backwards. This man!

My penis was hideous until I did this! 3. The penis is a much better clean. I have the freudulum with three interventions themselves, completely removed by the following method. Prerequisite is clean and sterile. Hands and penis thoroughly wash and sterilize the intervention agency. Everything else in my body is fucking filthy. Disgusting. I roll around in the mud all day.

You gotta use your hands and your penis to thoroughly wash and sterilize. Use your penis to wash your hands. Wash in the scalpel with my penis. First, I have the penis for about a five minute in ice water bath. Then you notice

the cut knot. Oh wow, you are getting more of a caveman all the time. After the sterilization of frenulum, I used a sharp pair of scissors. With a pair of scissors, it cannot slip. What? The frenulum in the middle up to the glands,

glands, more passing through. Thanks for clarifying that. You're welcome. Welcome. The glans or glans. Glans. If you're a city folk. It bleeds a little.

Do not panic. This is normal when you cut the front of the... Hang on. I cut my dick open for some reason. There was blood underneath. What? Did I do something wrong? No, no, no, no. Penises want to bleed. It's just their natural state. Next.

What a weird side effect. Next. Next, I have sterile gauze rolls inserted into the wound and the foreskin closed. Wound glued otherwise. What? Wait, he says... I discovered my penis in Gorilla Glue. That solves the problem. And I masturbated for a little while. Now I have a problem. Type in with one hand.

He said wound glued otherwise, which is in the past tense, so does that mean that this was attempt number two? Yes, this is about like number seven or something. Okay, now I'm not freaked out about the blood bite anymore. First thing I used to glue it back together was like melted gummy bears. That didn't work.

Don't recommend that. Then I used some more blood. It turns out that didn't work. Then I hear some more blood. It turns out that didn't work. Then I took the foreskin with a sticking plaster strips and a sealed condom pulled over. If still, little blood comes out, which was not the case. The next morning, I cautiously opened the foreskin.

This is the first time I've been cautious in my life about anything. Right now, I decided to be cautious. The bleeding had stopped, by the way, and urinates after I further disinfect the wound. I used piss to disinfect the wound. A new gauze rolls and brought back the foreskin closed. Pissing to disinfect the wound so far is best idea. Yeah.

But as I patched the booklet, easy to urinate can open. This is a mad lib at this point. After a week, the wound has healed so well that I could resist gently masturbate. You could resist your gently masturbation? Up until then, he's been gently masturbating. Now I can keep my hands off.

Yeah. Well, the blood stopped. I guess I... Incidentally, pain are limited is easily bearable. After a few months after the wound had healed well, I have only the rest of the frenulum on the glans bottom. Excuse me, glans, glans bottom. And after the well has healed, well, after the well was healed on the inside of the foreskin

in the same way away. Ultimately, I have, so to speak, a triangle cut out. Oh, shit. Good. That's good. That's, yeah. I'm sorry I don't. Ultimately, I have, so to speak, a triangle cut out.

With the result, I am very satisfied. The operation is now 30 years back! What?! So, I think this can be assessed. By the way, I'm 32 years old. Okay, well, we can circumcise your child, or we can get a little bit more creative. Well, creative, please, go on. I don't want my son to have unattractive penis.

You make it pretty. I hate all that frenulum. What a weird thing to do. What? All right, come, Quatwood, go ahead and read us what you found here. weird thing to do. Alright, come, go ahead and read us what you

found here. Hey, guys. Hey, guys. Hello. My name is Disturbing Noise.

You look like Michael Jackson. I, Disturbing Noise. Okay. Ramen Noddle Soup. Ooh, I love noddles. Ramen Noddle Soup.

My favorite way to cook Ramen Noddle Soup. One pack of ramen in a six-inch pot. Just enough water to get it to boil. I strain out or boil out most of it anyways. So a pack of ramen in a six-inch pot with just enough water to cook it. Put the flavor right away so it cooks with the noddles. So a pack of ramen in a six inch pot with just enough water to cook it. Put the flavor right away so it cooks with the noodles.

Add two drops of death sauce and a pinch of Mizdash original blend. Cook till the water is mostly boiled. And then four slices of Kraft cheese. That's not Kraft

like with a K. That's like finely crafted cheese right there. It's like Kraft beer you see. Stir it all together and let it cool.

Eat it all up. This forum says talk about anything, so this is my contribution. I half-assed how to cook rum in my favorite way. Thank you. Ui-leet. My name is Ui-leet. Ooh. I remember way back we had another one of these.

It was really cool to see how people cooked the same thing so differently. You boil the water, you put the fucking noodles in. Nottles, nottles. I put different cheap shit on my ramen. I put salt on mine. I put hot dogs in mine, bro. Oh, man.

Too rich for my blood. Okay, so there's another. This is similar to something that we already read, but this guy goes in a little bit more of an extreme. So, Stog, you're Mick Goggles. He's related to MacGyver. Oh, it's MacGoogles. MacGoogles.

Oh, you're right. Previously on MacGoogles. Ten seconds, MacGoogles. Oh, you're right. Previously on McGoogles. Ten seconds, McGoogles! Oh, give me one second. I gotta post something on the internet first. Topic, pouch. I thought of this a while ago, and I wonder if it's even possible.

Get a skin mod somehow where they make a pouch on you somehow like a kangaroo would have. Is that possible? Has it been done before? All right, now I'm ready to expose myself to the children. So you're literally going to cut a whole, like, pocket into your stomach. Yes.

Okay, well, you've made your decision. Just go ahead and tell us how it works out. Lemon, you're braids. Oh, I'm braids? Oh, okay. Oh, dear. No pauses. I think it would have to be an already healed piece of skin

flipped inside out like a pocket and inserted under the skin so that you would have to clean it out and all that and it would probably heal closed anyway if it even heals properly. Om nom nom nom nom. Was he eating his own stomach at that? He was eating a pocket out of his flesh. Okay, so, you know, bodymod.org, obviously a place where people sort of, you know, take

things to the extreme, do weird, crazy body modifications, things to their body that nobody's ever thought of before. So that and Boots. Take this one, please. All right. Hey, I'm Cha. I'm Cha. All right.

Hey, you guys. What's going on? What are you talking about here? Oh, you know, we were just talking about like, uh, cocks. You guys were talking about cock sheath, right? It came up, sure. I wanted to put my cock sheath in somebody else's pouch.

Could we make a device called a cock pocket? Like a cocket? Yeah. I have an idea for a genital mod. I'm wondering if anyone thought of this, or if anyone's done it. My idea is to take the skin and form a sort

of sheath that the penis retracts into when flaccid. Has this ever been done or thought of before? No! I just thought about taping a laser pointer in my dick, but... Dog, start your own topic, man.

Don't be Bogart and this guy's the way. M. She gets credit for newest idea in the world. Has this been done or thought of before? God, are you listening? Really? Because I thought of undoing what you just did. Okay. Oh, shit.

So a bunch of people talk about the whole restoring foreskin thing that we talked about in a previous episode. Yep. But Emcha's response to that is really good. Oh, well then take it. Okay. I know to have a retractable penis isn't possible for a human. And I'm not talking about a foreskin. It's really hard to just describe this,

so I'm just going to post a picture as an example and go there from here. Ignore improper anatomy and furriness. Also ignore the fact that it's a broken link. In this pic, there are two examples of what I'm trying to figure out how to do. Basically, it's less of a retractable penis and more of a pocket for the penis. Let's call it a vagina! There are a few problems with this. Like, how does less of a retractable penis and more of a pocket for the penis. Let's call it a vagina! There are a few problems with this. Like, how does the subject take a leak?

And how does the subject use a full length of his penis? My skin has a lot of elasticity, but I'm not sure about anybody else. Everyone else is flapping around. After doing some measurements, I found that for my penis to be entirely within a hypothetical sheath, said sheath would have to extend from my scrotum up to where my pubic hair stops, four inches below my belly button.

My penis is really weird. It goes down then up. Now what are you, wanna like conceal this at all times, Jesus? I'm surprised nobody's thought of this yet. Especially not people who modify themselves to be more animal-like in appearance. My name's Billybot. Hi, Billybot. You have your own idea,

which sounds great. Pubic hair extensions. And I've seen some pictures of reconstructed foreskins. if you are circumcised I can't see the pic of what I assume was animal genitalia but this would bring your glands into a shiatch of reconstructed

foreskin as well as a furry patch to hide it when you are on all fours or whatever the furriness could be extended to the belly chest and legs depending on your hair patterns there is a place that sells a device that stretches your remaining foreskin into a reasonable looking foreskin it is a cup shaped disc that you position over your remaining foreskin into a reasonable looking foreskin. It is a cup-shaped disc that you position over your glands, pull what's left of the foreskin over the disc

securing and place the soft latex bands and add in to weight as needed. So easy non-surgical way to have something similar to a dog penis is to come up with a way to build a foreskin stretcher then get soft hair of some kind from your local hairdresser's market. You can do extensions you don't mind

holding the hair around your junk. I'm just picturing the medics at a football game coming up with a stretcher made of forest boots. All right, pull and pound your pants, boy. We've got to see if you injured something. Okay, now. Oh, boy. Pull his pants back up.

It's a for-now solution to a problem you may see as urgent. Damn these pubes! I can't grow them down to my knees! There's gotta be a better way! Plus no cutting this way! The belly has a lot of muscles and other things more important in there too. To start plowing a tunnel into your abdomen goes beyond my realm of understanding. Were you just talking about a pocket where you could just tuck the penis in an upright position

when not in use above the top of your shaft? You are looking at a spot that has significant nerve supply to your junk. Not all sensation comes through this route but the cessation felt in the skin of the shaft. Then many blood supplies converge in this area. They go to various vital places. When you get in a fight, what do you protect? Your throat and your groin, have you ever been punched

in the pelvis? Kind of debilitating. So, b-b-b-be unit! In short, Billybutt thinks your idea is stupid. So, I just like the idea of coming up with a means of making your genitals very difficult to clean.

Hey, what about predator pussy on the second page? Okay, go ahead, Stug. Oh my god. Wow. Yes, Stug, bring out your Australian accent. Oh, shit. It's looking beautiful. Predator comma pussy.

Yeah, Australia it up. G'day, mate. I'm predator pussy. G'day, y'all. I may be the first to have this done. I have not found evidence that this has ever been achieved anywhere. However, that surprises me greatly. Yeah.

Any help or input from medically trained or experienced people will be appreciated. Specifically gender change. Penis enhancement folk. Thanks for standing still, wanker. Go on. I have some interest from a local plastic surgeon here at Oz. Wait, Oz? Yes, Oz.

Are you locked inside of that prison? No. He represents the Lollipop Guild. Stupid. Oh, okay. However, the cost quoted seems a bit extreme for something taking only a few hours without general anesthesia. As I understand it, the healing process will be painful and mobility in the region will be compromised, mate. And it's back. process will be painful, and mobility in the region will be compromised, mate. Why would you say mate is the

least Australian word? Being the first there are sure to be mistakes. I am seeking interest in people who want us to either be for themselves, or to be part of the development of this process. I want to work with an interested sergeant, who wants us to be part of the development of this process. I want to work with an interested Sergeant Cotta

who wants us to be a patch to their name. I want others who seek this transformation to be brave enough to be a part of the successful development of this mod. Okay, now we're in North London. Yep. Bring it home, Dick Van Dyke. We'll make this

happen fastest. It's an interesting party to sponsor this project. Either a surgeon who wants to give it a try pro bono, or a philanthropist with an anthropomorphist on their mind. Wait, wait, wait. Yeah, okay. I invite any and all comments, questions, and feedback. As anyone who is aware of the foley culture knows, this kind of thing can get big fast.

Ha ha, I made a funny wanker. D. Throw another penis pocket on the Barbie. Oh my god. Okay, eventually Big Big Drew responds, Yes, I have tried fetish communities, and to answer all the why a woman questions, I am very homophobic about a man touching me there.

Ew, not a dude! That's gross! That's fucked up, man. Gay! That's not natural! No, it's like... Okay, because a man touching you there doesn't necessarily mean they're gay, but he's very homophobic about a man touching you there doesn't necessarily mean they're gay, but he's very homophobic about a man. So when a man touches him there, he becomes very homophobic

about the area. So there's like a radius of homophobia. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's just your penis? Like if a guy shoves his dick in your ass, no problems there. Yeah, no problems there. When a man touches his penis,

there is a circumference of homophobia. If you're interested in removing it, you can use your choice of methods, are you serious, Persian kitty? Persian kitty? Let's get personal of this private hospital in Belgium? My name is Jack62

Hi zombie exact this I heavy said you have misunderstand me The ball's removal is much more easy Than a leg's And isn't comparable With a missing leg The life is bad and difficult

But with the missing ball sack The man's life is easier A half pound And with less trouble Oh man I can't pull on my pants again. These darn balls keep getting in the way. Boots, isn't Kumquat reading from your book from F Plus Live 2? Yes.

Yes, he is. He's good buying depression. Where is source of depression? In Nutsack? Yes. Okay, so we don't have time. Where is Source of Depression? In Nutsack? Yes. Okay. So, we don't have time. I guess we probably don't have time to get to it.

But rest assured that there is a topic about amputating my arms. Yeah, there is. Like yours specifically? What? Lemon's arms? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, I want to chop this one guy's arms off. Can anybody help me?

I want it to be safe and sterile. So there's a very long post about him wanting to amputate his arms, and then Frogaholic responds, Wow, man, I'm pretty drunk right now, but I got to say what you're doing is great. But we're not going to do that because we need to go to the Instructables website and

learn how to do... And this is just a beginner course, so all of the F Plus listeners can learn something from this. This is a DIY tattoos, stick and poke. Ah! Will.

Yeah. Oh, God. Alright, Bunnybrite, you want to take this? I do, I do. I want to make sure that the world is a safer place. Featured author, I'm in the bathroom. I'm the QA engineer here at Instructables. Iatured author, I'm in the bathroom. I'm the QA engineer here at Instructables. I make cool projects in between testing Instructables.com to make sure if it works awesomely.

So give me your bugs. Let us begin. The art of tattooing has been around for centuries, with every major culture doing the process. In today's world, tattooing is most of the time left to experts resulting in very beautiful works much like that tattoo but what if you want to do your own there we go instructable will cover the art of stick and poke tattoos that will enable you to safely add your own dermal embellishments warning these tattoos although light are Oh! Just these tattoos though. Just these. Every other one washes off.

Think about what you want on your body before you go through with it. Also, it does hurt to jam needles into your skin, you dumb shit. And depending on your pain level, it may hurt too much. Test without ink first. Just jam a bunch of needles in there without anything on them. Don't sterilize them. Jimmy, what are you doing? Practicing! Go for your neck first.

Test without ink first to see if you want to spend 30 minutes poking your skin to get some cool stuff. Let's get on with it, shall we? Step one, supplies. You're going to need a pencil and a circle and some ink and some needles. I'm sorry. Hover over that pencil because it can't just be a pencil. Oh, I'm sorry. Number two only pencil, please.

It's only going to work with that one. Otherwise, you could kill yourself. You don't need much for this instructable, but here's the supply list. One pencil, one sewing needle of medium size, one jar lid, a bottle of black ink. This Instructable uses Higgins waterproof inks. String, just because I like string. A stove or other fire producing device. A flame thrower if you got one.

Rubbing alcohol, antibacterial soap, and unscented lotion. You just want to jerk off while you're doing this, right? Step two, disinfecting your skin. The next step is to clean your skin. Use a antibacterial soap or rubbing alcohol to clean the area you want to tattoo. This will make sure that the area is prepped for poking.

Step three, you should draw your image, maybe, instead of just winging it. Come on! That's lame! I want to have freedom. Then, with a regular ballpoint pen, you draw what you want to have your tattoo be. You will follow the lines you draw with the needle and ink later on.

No, I won't. I'm way too drunk for that. with the needle and ink later on. No, I won't. I'm way too drunk for that. Step four, disinfecting needle and prep and making Stog squeamish. First, there we go. First, poke the needle into the pencil like in the first picture.

Yes, Stog, look at it. Look right at it. I love all of these photos of the people actually doing stick-and-poke tattoos because it looks like a really depressing shooting gallery. As opposed to one of the light-hearted, fun shooting galleries. Well, time to do the meth again. Then use fire to disinfect the needle.

The once-the-needle cools wraps the needle with string only leaving a bit of the needle at the tip exposed. Got it? The needle. The once the needle cools wraps the needle with string only leaving a bit of the needle at the tip exposed. Got it? The needle. Step five, inking the needle. Next, take the ink and put a little bit into a jar lid. The take the

string wrapped needle and dip the tip into the ink, getting a good amount on there. The string will act as a wick as well. Step six, start poking. I want to get that embroidered on a pillow.

Start poking. Once you have the area clean and prepped, you can start poking. Yes, it will hurt. Yes, it will hurt. Yes, it will take a while. Poke into the skin just enough where the dermis sticks a little to the needle. It may take a few tries to get it right. Pull the skin tight to make it easier, and follow the lines your drew in the last step.

Always be sure to have your drew on hand. Andrew, come here. That's not my Drew. That's your Drew. Oh, I get them mixed up. They all look alike. Keep some paper towels on hand in case you start bleeding.

That won't happen. You're stabbing yourself repeatedly. Why would you start bleeding? Step seven, poking. Part two. Ernest goes to poke. Once you go over the tattoo once, it may not be dark enough for you, so go over it again if you wish. There. There you go. That way it'll scab up really nice.

The area you poke will become a bit raised and swell. This is normal. It is swell. That's a swell goddamn tattoo. Gosh darn, man. Gee will willikers the area you poke will become a bit raised and swell this is normal everything else that i've talked about is not normal step eight after care afterwards you should clean the tattoo again and put something on it to protect it like saran wrap be sure to have uh roy orbison on hand you can protect the saran wrap after a few hours you should be able to take the saran wrap off and use regular unscented lotion for a few days keep the tattoo out of sunlight for the first two days as well hope you enjoyed

this instructable please comment with any improvements or experiences although this is perfect as is unimprovable trust me i want to thank my friends retchell laura and misha for letting them document the tattooing process i'm actually too much of a wussy and didn't get one but now i wrote up this instructable i I really should. Instructables robot, maybe? So, so, I assume it's Misha that's very proud of the tattoo that he got on his bicep of a triangle.

Not even a real triangle. Now I can pretend I went to prison. Yeah, but that's their time to joint. Here, let me take off my shoes. Hang on, hang on on hang on hang on Shit is hardcore baby I didn't go in for the white power gang I went in for the triangles

And there we go. We're at about an hour of... Boots, what'd you learn this week? I learned that my body is fucking boring. It really is. I feel like I've been saying that to you for years, but now we have proof. Yeah, no. Well, not just mine.

Just our bodies are fucking yeah yeah it's you know it's it's i i mean i've definitely you know i i've i've i've got you know a couple of piercings and tattoos not not to any um ridiculous degree but like i've known people that like kind of work in the industry why not a handy pouch? Yeah. Something about that access, you know? It's that, like, oh, you know, I've got the piercing. I've got the tattoo. That's boring. I want to, like, carve holes in my back so that I can be suspended from meat hooks.

Yeah, you know, I'm functional, but I want to be utilitarian. Swiss Army dick. Yeah, you know, I'm functional, but I want to be utilitarian. Swiss army dick. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know how often like, you know, I think the interesting thought is to figure out how often these people are actually

really doing this shit, like how often people are actually making, you know, like little penis pouches, and how often they're just like thinking it would be neat and then moving on to something else. Yeah, the internet is the land of pontification, and I think that's the majority of what we focused on today. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, the internet is home of, I have an idea!

Hey, what's that over there? And if you are looking for a place on the internet to leave comments, you should go to thefpl.us. We have a place where there are hundreds, hundreds

of comments left by the same 12 or 16 people. And, you know, while we enjoy that, we think it's pretty great, I feel like it's time to have a little bit of differing voices in the discourse. A couple of new people jumping in there,

and, I don't know, saying whatever it is that, you know, you think about the episode. Yeah, we'd love to hear from you. Tell us what your favorite proposal for a body mod is. Yes. And we will, uh,

subject somebody from the ridiculous list to it. Yeah. I think we're just going to give them like, uh, we'll, we'll pick the best, uh, body modification and we'll do it to AC or while he's sleeping.

That sounds great. All right. Don't let them know. All right. Until next week. See you later. Good night. Bye. next week. See you later. Good night. Bye-bye.

I'm looking for a woman who would like to cut off my pee-pee and balls. I'm looking for a woman who would like to cut off my pee-pee and balls. I'm looking for a woman who would like to cut off my pee-pee and balls, mate. I'm looking for a woman who would like to cut off my pee-pee and balls. I'm looking for a woman who would like to cut off my pee-pee and balls.