The F Plus - 97: Even Nonsense

Episode Date: March 27, 2013

"Culture" is a tricky word, but it best describes our modern popular arts and entertainment, regardless of quality. When it comes to music, the disposable profit-motivated pop music released over the past 60 years has done far more to influence our way of life than the hundreds of years of finely crafted art before it. Maybe this is a condemnation of the direction humanity has taken, or maybe it's that it's way more fun to listen to "Shoop" than it is to read Leaves of Grass. But have you ever taken a moment to consider who was really responsible for all of this? Because it turns out it's just some lady with a blog. This week, we're writing the definitive Nirvana biopic. Editor's note: Cleretic also submitted a document with this content.

Wake me up inside. Can't wake up. Wake me up inside. Crawling in my skin. These roads, they will not heal. Wake up! Once it was over, there was no makeup. Makeup!

Why'd you put the keys upon the table? Every morning there's a halo hanging from the corner of my girlfriend's four-post bed. I can't imagine that there was a party that has ever existed on Earth that could not be killed by Sugar Ray. I think he's something like 25th level, so yeah, he's hard. Wait, do you mean the song or the band itself? Or that guy?

Shut up! Let's talk about the episode! Sure. The boxer. Shut up! Shut up! Hey there, this is the F+, Terrible Things, Red with Enthusiasm. My name's Lemon. I'm Boots Reingear. Hey Boots, how you doing tonight?

Oh, just fine, fine. I've been thinking about how much I love Amy Lee. I'm not familiar with that name, actually. You know Evanescence? No, not really. I mean, I know that they were like a new metal kind of band. Is that right? I don't know. Okay.

Yeah, but Evanescence, their lead singer is Amy Lee. Sure. And I am a big fan of Amy Lee, who is not the lead singer of Evanescence, but also the person who writes all the Evanescence songs. Wow, that was a sentence. Yeah. Wait, you was a sentence. Yeah. What, you're confused? I'm very confused, yeah.

Well, buckle in. There's more of that coming. Okay, the Amy Lee that we were interested in, also she's responsible for everything that has ever been created in pop music and television culture? Well, that sounds like a crazy person, so therefore, readers assemble! I write the songs, I write the songs.

In the room tonight, we have John. The inspiration to write the song Va Va Voom came from the Vidal Sassoon 1980s advertisement. Buddy Brad! So I was hanging around with Michael Hutchins, Michael Jackson, and some other Michael, and then we invented John, the guy who just spoke. Hey! Nutshell Gulag! I would also name the search engine Yahoo for Jonathan

Swift's use of the word for a redhead in Gulliver's Travels. Boots, ring, gear? I gave Dave Navarro his name. Dave for David Lee Roth, and Navarro due to its Spanish origin. Right. Okay, Stog? Michael Stipe loves to read Albert Camus. Albert Camus is the author

of The Myth of Sisyphus. It was Kurt Kubain who told Michael Stipe aboutus is the author of The Myth of Sisyphus. It was Kurt Cobain who told Michael Stipe about the cartoon episode titled Wile E. Sisyphus. Jimmy Franks. I invented the TV show Knight Rider and a bunch of other shit. And Lemon. The first song I wrote for the Irish band The Cranberries was the song Zombie, inspired on working on songs for Rob Zombie. Song Zombie, inspired on working on songs for Rob Zombie. Today we're going to be on a site called Michael Hutchence and Me.

Yay! It's a woman who's responsible for a lot of different music, but most sort of famously she's responsible for Michael Hutchence. In her mind. Jimmy Franks, you want to start us out here and tell us about yourself? Certainly. I'm Amy Lee, songwriter and founder of Evanescence. All right.

Before I tell you about myself, I'd like to quote the hit Broadway show, Rock of Ages, it's better to burn out than to fade away. Keep it rolling. And to have your corpse exploited 20 years later by shitty Broadway musicians. The end. The story of how I was discovered and what happened over 25 years is not easy for me to tell. Just like life, it is full of twists,

turns, and even ambiguity. It is your choice to believe it or not. I am not trying to convince you one way or the other, only putting what happened to me into words other than what I already put into the songs. Okay. At the age of 15, on May 15, 1983, at Boutwell Auditorium

in Birmingham, Alabama, I was discovered by Def Leppard's lead singer, Joe Elliott. Unknown to me at the time, Joe spotted me in the audience near the stage, followed me and my friends home from the concert, and watched me being dropped off at my front door. Could we just listen to your songs instead? Now it's getting interesting.

Yeah, this is a promising Rags to Riches story. Oh, fuck. That girl. The next day after I returned home from school, the doorbell rang. I opened the door to find a young man with bright blue eyes and shoulder-length brown hair pointing to a van sitting at the top of my driveway. He never told me his real name, but was with him as he chose his stage name of Kurt Cobain.

Yeah. Uh-oh. Yeah. Oh, boy. This keeps getting better. Right. So you met Kurt Cobain at a Def Leppard concert. I don't see any problem with that.

Yeah, and I was totally like, you smell like teen spirit. Are we sure this isn't on fanfic.net or something? I'm confused. Out of the van stepped the lead singer in full stage costume. After I found out the lead singer's name, he asked me if I wanted to be a singer. To his astonishment, I said no, and that I had no desire to be famous. We did start writing Pour Some Sugar On Me Together,

and how my career as a songwriter started. It wasn't long after that, Joe himself started spreading rumors, which hit the public of his girlfriend being a redhead. Oh, what salacious rumors. Is it true, sir? Your girlfriend has hair? I can neither confirm nor deny the redness of her hair. Thank you. It was also during this time that Joe made up a girlfriend by the name of Denise Dakin, which Joe and his road crew said I was her. Oh, of course. I wasn't dating somebody named Amy Lee. I was dating someone named Denise Dakin.

Was this how Tuyasa Sopo started? Like, this is his first made-up girlfriend? Oh, okay. Never mind, boys. We hit a dead end here. It was during this time that I met Rick Allen, Def Leppard's drummer, and the 16-year-old girl he convinced to be his girlfriend. Oh, that's great.

I told her Joe had tried to convince me to be his girlfriend to get me to have sex with him too, but I wasn't that gullible. The girl was the daughter of a man who managed the Birmingham Jefferson County Civic Center by the name of Rosemary Goodmore, though they gave her the nickname of Beth for the Kiss song. Yes, for that well-known Kiss-Death Leopard collaboration.

Oh, good. Hey, are you going to cause that car crash? This is directly pulled from some man's coma dream, isn't it? Michael Hutchinson and I met a couple of weeks later, and in October of 83, we read a review of a chorus line by Frank Rich of the New York Times. It originally went to press on October 1, 1983, the say day my grandmother lost her battle with leukemia.

The article became an inspiration for me to write the song like a virgin performed by madonna new sensation performed by nxs and to name a band evanescence if you like if you play you know like like a virgin and new sensation back to back like it's hard to tell where one begins and the other ends. Yeah. I can see how that one thing made. Well,

yeah, I mean, obviously this article has all those words highlighted. You got me feeling like a virgin. Like a virgin. And all the Evanescence songs. there you go. We asked someone to look up the definition of the word Evanescence,

process of vanishing or fading away, disappear. I drew a connection to the lyrics Def Leppard borrowed from Neil Young for Rock of Ages, see lyrics at top of page, and decided this would be the name of a band that I started writing songs which they would perform. The definition of the word also inspired me to write the song Disappear performed by NXS. Let's line up, too.

Due to Kurt Cobain being on the road crew when Joe Elliott discovered me, he would also use, it's better to burn out than to fade away from the lyrics, Def Leppard's Rock of Ages which they borrowed from a Neil Young song for his fake suicide note in 1994 and addressed to me. Kurt Cobain gave me a rose. I said it has a thorn. He said every rose has a thorn.

So, is she saying that somewhere in there that Kurt Cobain faked his suicide? Okay, just checking. Wait a minute! That part of the story is implausible! At first I was skeptical, now I'm not so sure. Michael Hutchence only used my real name once in public, and it was the lyrics of the song Reckless Ways recorded by NXS. Not quite a year after meeting and starting to work with Michael Jackson on songs, Oh, there's a twist.

Holy shit! Hope you enjoy and feel free to leave comments! Love, Amy Lee. Yes, it is my real name. I invented Evanescence. I am the singer and songwriter and founder of Evanescence. By the way, I'm not the singer and songwriter of Evanescence. Why are you confused?

Well, I mean, it makes sense that Amy Lee and Evanescence stole her stage name because, I mean, who could come up with the name Amy Lee? I mean, there couldn't be two people named those names at the same time somehow. Pretty good. Had to be theft. Hey, has anyone else been having problems with angels? Yeah. They're the worst.

Feathers it everywhere. I'm glad somebody else said it, because I wanted to bitch about this. I can never figure out how to talk to one, so yeah. It's a controversial subject. Stog, how do I destroy angels? How do you destroy angels? Well, let me tell you. Good.

The town of St. Elmo, Alabama derives its name from the 1866 novel, the same name authored by Augusto Evans Wilson, a.k.a. Augusta Jane Evans. Who also wrote the theme song to St. Elmo's Fire. Right. Someone brought in the novel for me to read, which I read out loud to Tom Cruise and Kurt Cobain. Oh. Who were hanging out together, obviously. For 17 hours while I read this out loud to him.

I had no idea that Kurt Cobain was such a star fucker. I think Tom Cruise bequeathed the secret of plaid to Kurt Cobain. It's a little known fact that risky business was the inspiration for the cesticide. It was the mention of Lookout Mountain in the book and the Fairy and Gnome Gardens that are created by John Garnett Carter and his wife, Sea Rock City Gardens, that inspired Tom Cruise to come up with ideas for the 1985 film Legend, while at the same time I worked on songs. Yeah, because that was all Tom Cruise. Yeah, he wrote Legend, right? Like, he wrote and directed and starred in it? Yeah, it wasn't William Hjortzberg or anything.

Yeah. Yeah, he played all the roles in there, too. Yeah. I think it was his life story, wasnberg or anything. Yeah. Yeah, he played all the roles in there, too. I think it was his life story, wasn't it? He played the unicorn, I know that. Well, this lady played Dr. Feelgood, and Tom Cruise got the idea for the legend from that first. Anyway, there's a really awesome surprise twist in the next paragraph.

The book St. Elmo would inspire me to write the theme song for the 1985 film St. Elmo's inspire me to write the theme song for the 1985 film St. Elmo's Fire. You are Amy Lee, aren't you? John Parr would record the song St. Elmo's Fire, Man in Motion. I would also write the song Is Your Love Strong Enough, which Tom Cruise would choose for the soundtrack to the Red Lee Scott film Legend. The song would be recorded by Brian

Ferry of Roxy Music and was released with the Tangerine Dream version of the soundtrack on CD. She also doesn't know that when she wrote the song, the theme song to St. Elmo's Fire, she really originally wrote it for a man in a wheelchair

who was doing a trip around North America, but anyway. She doesn't know that. This is the weirdest episode of Behind the Music I've ever seen. Ferry would also record the song I wrote, Slave to Love, which would be featured on the soundtrack to Nine and a Half Weeks, with which

Kurt Cobain and I worked on ideas for the film together. Wait. Yep. I would later write the song which Kurt Cobain and I worked on ideas for the film together. Wait. What? Yep. Yep. Yep. I would later write the song,

I'm a Slave for You, recorded by the artist we named Britney Spears. We named? We named Britney Spears. When she was born, we decided, hey, you know, it'd be an awesome name. We saw her in that pet shop window, and her cute little face just said,

Britney Spears. Not just said Britney Spears. Not the actual Britney Spears. Actually, they wanted to name her Amy Lee, but then I said, no. Rise, young blonde woman, and be dubbed Britney Spears. These songs, which were written many years before release, would

also inspire the band names Alice in Chains and Audioslave. Of course they would. Anything that has a slave kind of connotation to it is all comes from her. Nobody ever thought of slaves before.

I get Audioslave, but Alice in Chains is like, well, it's kind of, you know. Well, she's talking about Trent Reznor. Maybe she'll get to happiness in slavery or something, yeah. In slavery, there you go, yeah. Hey, wait a second. Hey, stop stealing my shtick. That's my shtick you're stealing.

Since I... Amy Lee invented shtick. Since I worked with Trent Reznor over the years, I've helped to come up with a stage name of Mary Queen Mandig. What a terrible stage name that is. That's horrible. I've never heard that is. That's horrible. I've never heard that before. Age not found.

Trent would choose the song Is Your Love Strong Enough to be covered by How to Destroy Angels for the soundtrack to the 2011 US version of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. The name of Mary Queen came from me using the name of Mary in the song Lose Control recorded by Evanescence and Kurt Cobain,

which chose the name for the pseudonym of his aunt. The name of Queen came from my writing songs for the band Queen and the Queen of England being in my life. Of course, that makes all the sense now. The Queen of England being in my life. How are we? She would pop in and out and see how we're doing. And how are you doing, dear? How's my favorite Amy Lee?

Okay, so, yeah. So, Amy Lee responsible for many... What? Many songs, as you can actually see in the links on the top of this page. She is also responsible for 8-6-7-5-3-0-9. And Gnarls Barkley's Crazy. Or I think actually just

Gnarls Barkley as a whole. She's a one-woman brill building. Just a hit machine. Gnarls Barkley came up with the idea for Crazy by just looking at me. Then he started writing. I like that her repertoire is so vast and so deep that she can reference it by free association. All right. Let's see.

I guess we'll just go with what song we like better. Bunny Bread. Yes. Which song would you prefer to talk about? we'll just go with what uh what song we like better um uh bunny bread yes which song which song would you prefer to talk about uh lucky star uh by madonna yes or gangnam style by side oh god don't this is sophie's choice now oh let's see god one side of my family will hate me if I choose one. Oh, I believe Gangnam Style is more recent and will be forgotten in the next three months. So, yeah, let's go with that. All right. All right.

Well, as it happens, Amy Lee is also responsible for Gangnam Style. Oh, no. That's shocking. Yeah. Sounds about right. Would you tell us about that, please? I would love to. I like that all of these stories seem to start from Alabama, the musical epicenter of the universe.

Yes. They invented sound. Well, Amy Lee did, but, you know, Alabama took credit. Someday I'm going to leave this jerky-ass town. I'm going to move to Alabama and become a music star. town. I'm going to move to Alabama and become a music store. Alabama would be awarded the contract for the new Hyundai plant, which

opened in 2005. This is going to tie together. Oh my god. Hyundai is headquartered in Seoul, South Korea. It was at this time I was asked to make up a song about Gangnam Style. So a car plant opened up

and a man walked out to my house and said, Hey, you American lady, would you like to make a song about whores? You know, all the kids are talking about Gangnam Style, but there's not a song for it for some reason. Song writing lady. And inspired by the Gangnam District of Seoul, South Korea. So, you know, it's all things to all people.

The song was very much inspired by sense of humor and writing songs for Ricky Martin. Sure. Right said Fred, I'm too sexy, LMFAO. Sexy and I know it, etc. So wait, right said Fred are also LMFAO?

Or just... Well, those are the two things that every songwriter cites. etc so wait right said Fred are also LMFAO or just well those are the two things that every songwriter cites for their inspirations the universal sense of humor and writing songs for Ricky Martin it was also during this time that I met with Tom Hanks and writers

discussing ideas for a new book to film he would star entitled The Da Vinci Code. Are you responsible for button buddies? Uh, yes. He probably is. If you keep reading, it had been many years before that. It had been many years before that I met with Dodi Fayyad and Australian Brian Brown

to work on ideas for the film FX2, The Deadly Art of Illusion. Why would you even bother trying to tie that in? But if you really want a name dropping, okay, here we go. You know, the huge hit. The sequel to the film that nobody saw. Which was inspired by my love. Hey, it had a robot clown that drove a plane called Bluey. I stand corrected.

Which was inspired by my love of the work of Michelangelo Buonarroti who painted the Sistine Chapel located in Vatican City. Oh, that Michelangelo. Yeah, that's the one. Not the Ninja Turtle that she also inspired later

if you keep reading. It was also during this time I told Hanks, before my friends gave me the nickname of Tommy, they called me the redhead Mona Lisa. That, anybody else got a guess at what that sentence

really was supposed to mean? Okay, so now her name is Tommy Lee. She, yeah, and then some other guy stole that name. Julia,

Well, that's because, that's because one of the guys saw her giant penis. Oh, yeah. It was at this time when I was done fucking Pamela Anderson. Oh, I love you, baby.

You're so good. Julia Roberts overheard the conversation and decided to have the film Mona Lisa Smile 2003 developed. That thieving bitch. Yes. Yes, she is. I just picture Julia Roberts peeking behind a corner and then listening to her. It's like, I got it.

I should start a mediocre romantic comedy. That has little to do with this phrase. I got everything. And then I said, hey, miss, that wasn't very congenial. And then she said to me, wait a minute, I'm not Sandra Bullock. And then she replied with, no digggity and then there's some other guys singularity i was asked to give the stage name of the artist who would record the song and i remembered tom hanks mentioning he wanted to use the fibonacci code

the symbol or trident of psi or psi is used in mathematics the reciprocal fibonacci code. The symbol or trident of Psi or Psi is used in mathematics. The reciprocal Fibonacci constant. God, you're just blowing my mind over and over again. Six degrees of fucking nuts here. Ideas

at this time were also tossed around for the book to film I Named Angels and Demons. The book would be inspired by my work with film I Named Angels and Demons. The book would be inspired by my work with Steve Wozniak and Steve Jobs, founders of Apple Computers and Bill Gates who were working with Tim Berners who would adopt the name Lee.

Inventor of what I... What? Why are you laughing? I'm not. I'm gasping. Hang on here. I didn't even know how amazing I was up until now. Inventor of the what I named the World Wide Web at CERN. What did you name it? You named the World Wide Web at CERN?

I named the World Wide Web at CERN. And then they decided just to drop the last part and they said, oh, it's neater, it's cleaner. In 1984, scientists at CERN believed they found the God Particle, also known as the T-Top Quark. The idea for the Illuminati and the Covenant was inspired by the two secret societies inside the Mormon Church. Yeah, there's nothing about the Catholics in there anywhere. No, it was all, yeah, you read the wrong version.

The full 1895 news article about the Mormon Church and the Illuminati can be found here on Google News. Blah, blah, blah, Illuminati, Illuminati, Mormons. Okay, good. Well, thanks so much for that song. I love the adventure we take on every single paragraph of this one. You know, the tags at the bottom are great because I'm wondering how many of them get reused. I mean, is there more tags for Dodi Fayed or the God Particle?

If we click on these, will we find new realms of beauty? Let's see what Julia Stiles takes us. Just the one post. This is the most elaborate attempt of

someone to cheat the unemployment office out of welfare money. You know, spending all this time, you probably could be looking for a job. John? Yes? I have a similar choice for you. Okay. A choice you're going to have to make. The same choice that every man has to make

in his life. At my bar mitzvah, I was probably asked the same question, so go ahead. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now you've become a ridiculous... Britney Spears or Jeff Dunham? Oh, God. This is a hard choice. I gotta go with Jeff Dunham.

Yeah, okay. Well, good, because Amy Lee is responsible not only for Jeff Dunham, but also for Peanut. Oh. I assumed Peanut was his own kind of thing. All right. Yeah, no, they were originally, you know, they originally worked as singles. Yeah. They said, hey, you know what?

We could team up and really do something here. Right. One of her nicknames was Jeff Dunham. That's how he got the idea for the name. The day I met the comedian and ventriloquist who goes by the stage name Jeff Dunham, Ricky Martin had shown up with his head almost completely shaved

except for a little tufted of hair at the crown sticking up. Ricky was sitting on the edge of the bed in front of me and I was playing with this tuft of hair while talking to the comedian. Hey, Ricky Martin, what you thinking of? Is she a koala bear or something?

Why is she just... This was the exact moment Ricky Martin realized he was gay. Did I give him the idea of moving the puppet's mouth? Now you're thinking with Amy. I gave him the idea of not moving his own mouth but he rejected that i'm saying this too serious half the time we were joking around but i also told him about nicknaming trent resnor peanut trent would usually would usually would

stand across the room and i started calling this area of the room the peanut gallery inspired by the Muppets and Trent's unsolicited commentary at times. So the Muppets were there as well? All of them? Was it just those two old guys who went They hung out with Trent Reznor for a while and Waldorf for an hour at all times. Jeff asked me

my favorite colors and I told him purple and green. Purple is of course one of the reasons I wrote the song Purple Rain for Prince. Of course you did. And the unofficial sequel, Green Shit. I'm sorry, you wrote the song Purple Rain because

the color purple exists? Yes. Yeah, purple is one of the reasons. I love this color. It needs a song. If purple didn't exist, there wouldn't be the song Purple Rain would there? Objectively true. It would just be rain. So that might have some difficulties where the color purple did not exist.

Yeah, so that is honestly one of the reasons that song was written. Well, we also talked about my favorite Muppet being Animal, which also inspired me to write the song Animal for Def Leppard. Oh, I see. So if that Muppet didn't exist, then Def Leppard wouldn't have much of a hit there.

Okay, good. It's time to portion around me! He also wanted to know one of my family names, and I told him... He also wanted to know one of my family names, and I told him of my great-grandfather's surname of Denham. He then changed it to Dunham for part of his stage name Oh lord

Sure, okay. I'm gonna just look this up on Wikipedia I'm not denying, I'm not doubting you I'm just looking it up on Wikipedia Look, Wikipedia is full of bullshit made by people who just have nothing to do with their lives, okay? We need to change all the entries to reflect the truth of this. Amy Lee-pedia.

Yeah. The reason the comedian claims to have been inspired to come up with his character Peanut on a cruise ship is due to the 1983 cruise I took on Carnival Cruise Line, which would also inspire ideas while we worked on the script for the 1997 film Titanic. I got a great idea for the movie!

The movie should be on a boat! This is hard for me to believe because I'm very committed to the story of Jeff Dunham discovering, coming up with the character of Peanut on a cruise ship. This is a woman that you would never want to be stuck on a cruise ship with because you know she'd be right

next to you in the buffet line telling you all this stuff and just never stopping. You know, it all sounds really impressive but all this really says is it takes her forever to actually get shit done. Like, it took her 14 years to make Titanic actually happen. Well, she was writing

a lot of other songs in that time. Yeah. She's a bit of a multitasker, this one. At the time of my cruise in 1983, Carnival only had four ships in operation, and I was on the Mardi Gras. The first mate, or first officer, was Marco Nogara, who would later become a ship's captain.

It was Michael Jackson who promised Marco would be moved to the Disney Cruise Line, which took place only in the last couple of years. Now, guys, you might have been downing it at this point. It's such an airtight case on each of these articles.

But you might have been downing here, but check this out, alright? The colors for New Orleans Mardi Gras are purple, green, and gold. Holy shit! Kobayashi! Yes! Someone get the president

on the line. We cracked the case. That's two of the three of the simple colors that sort of exist on that thing. Lemons dropping the cup. Oh my god. Amy Lee's nickname was Kaiser Soze. That inspired the usual suspects.

All right. We've gotten this far in the blog, Michael Hutchinson Me, and we've forgotten to name drop Michael Hutchins. So, you know, I mean, I don't know who's to blame for that, if Amy Lee or it's us. So let's fix that. Nutshells. Both of these articles will contain Michael Hutchins in them somewhere.

One is about Duran Duran. The other is about Crunch Berries. What would you like to read? You know, it's funny because I'm hungry like the wolf for Crunch Berries, so it's hard to choose. Got a pick? Oh, I'll go with Duran Duran. Duran Duran.

All right. This article is called Strawberries and Cream. God damn it. I'm never going to learn about Crunch Berries. That's something your parents should have taught you, Bunny Bread. They should have, yeah. Tagged as Amy Lee, Duran Duran, in excess, Michael Hutchence, Queen Elizabeth.

All right. Strawberries and cream. Queen Elizabeth. Spoiler. Exhausted from working on songs one evening, I fell asleep, only to wake and find John Taylor of Duran Duran lying next to me.

A shirtless and smiling Michael was lying across the head of the bed. I remembered meeting John before this and predicting how he would be a teen heartthrob. Duran Duran did take off and told him how my girlfriends were all talking about him. As any 16-year-old girl who might find themselves in my situation, I started giggling. By my situation, you mean waking up from a threesome? Because that's how your story started, lady.

Someone brought a bowl of strawberries and whipped cream into the room. With an evil smile, I dug my hand into the bowl of cream, and with a shake of my hand, splattered the entire contents on Michael's chest, the walls, his hair, and on John. So you had a seizure, is that what you're saying? I spread the cream out and started drawing and writing in it, focusing on Michael. I think John was a little bewildered as he kept trying to talk to me. I drew, I heart you in the cream, and Michael proudly showed it to John before wiping off and anyone else noticing.

I was snapped back to reality about the mess we were in when Queen Elizabeth busted through the door and started yelling at Michael. All right, this is just a sitcom now. Or an SNL skit. This needs to be filmed. Queen Elizabeth, you're always running in here. Hi, everybody.

Yeah, come on. Come on, Funny or Die guys. Give us some money so we can film this. Years later, Michael, distraught by our conversation, sat up in bed and leaned against his fist. In the shadow of the sun streaming through the window and through his arm, I saw the outline of a heart. Having taken photography in high school

and having an eye for such things, I made a big deal about it and said he should have a photo made. The result being the melancholy photo of Michael at the top of the page. Good fucking lord! My name's Amy Lee and I designed

the Windows logo. Yeah, you did. Where'd you get your inspiration? Is it from a door? I had several inspirations which I'll get to in just a moment. But anyway, designing the Windows logo. Let me tell you about it. Despite believing that I might be in love with Michael Hutchence,

I still dismissed the questions of whether I wanted to marry him. I was still a teen at the time, and I knew Michael was involved in helping to keep me quiet. Shut up. Like a pillow over her face? Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! You did not meet Kurt Cobain. You did not meet Michael Jackson. Will you shut the fuck up? My name's not Michael!

The later of which broke my heart to know a man I could be in love with would help to hurt me. Tim Ferriss asked me if I wanted to marry Michael. The thought hadn't really crossed my mind at the time, so in reply, I said, Our children would probably be funny looking with crazy curly red hair. That's the response of a sane person. Will you marry me?

Our children would have curly hair. Crazy hair. Tim, who had told me that redhead in Aussie slang called Bluey, told me in Jonathan Swift's Gulliver's Travels, a redhead is called a yahoo. Oh, here we go. No, they called you a yahoo. All right.

Nothing to do with your hair. Rev up the crazy cycle. Rev up the crazy cycle. We're about to jump over the Grand Canyon here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You knew about Britney Spears, but fucking yahoo is serious. All right, nothing to do with your hair. Rev up the crazy cycle. Rev up the crazy cycle. We're about to jump over the Grand Canyon here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You knew about Britney Spears, but fucking Yahoo! Serious. All right.

We get the big time. Yep. Okay. Yahoo! Serious inspired Yahoo.com, right? I think actually we're going to make the connection. I'm sure we are. Did Yahoo!

Inspire Yahoo? Swift writes that, quote, Neither was the hair of this brute a Yahoo of red color, which might have been some excuse for an appetite a little irregular, but black is a slow. He asked me what I would call our child, and I said, Yahoo serious. Serious rhymes with Prince's song, Delirious. And this is where the Australian actor-comedian Greg Peed's stage name came from.

Wait, what? I don't know. I don't get that one. Just keep nodding. Don't make eye contact. Give me a dollar, please. Michael Hutchins would write in his journal, I'm Serious, when he wrote,

Raise Your Glass, recorded by the artist I named Pink, but apparently I didn't do it with the exclamation point because I thought that was fucking stupid to put an exclamation point in your name, wrote, Why So Serious? As a teen, I started working on ideas for the World Wide Web with the founders of Apple Computer, Steve Wozniak and Steve Jobs, and later would name and work on ideas for Bill Gates' Windows. After Apple Computer. I just picture her lying on her bed like a frilly pink diary there. would name and work on ideas for Bill Gates' Windows after Apple.

I just picture her lying on her bed like a frilly pink diary there, a bunch of cartoony computers drawn pointing to each other. What if they connected? Hmm. Like putting the pencil to her mouth, chewing on the eraser. I wonder what that would be like. You came up with another great idea today. Can't wait to tell Bill.

I just realized something. We're dealing with the exact opposite of Johnny Tsunami. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is the exact perfect opposite. Right, because Johnny Tsunami created nothing and sued for all of it. Amy Lee gave all of this stuff out of the goodness of her heart. She's just a very giving woman. Well, she didn't even really give a lot of this.

She's just inspired by association. She never really gave over the rights. She was just there saying something when someone was there. Weird. She's just a muse. And also she helped form Muse. She's a dumb. Um.

Oh. I even helped to design the Windows logo. Wozniak explained CERN, parentheses, the brain, and where they were located, and even mentioned Tim Berners, hyphen, quotation mark, Lee, quotation mark. So his name is Tim Berners Lee. You have to do those finger quotes every time you say his name. You haveers-Lee. You have to do those finger quotes every time you say his name. You have to.

Okay. Yep. No problem. Okay. Good. Good. It was my idea for... Because we're going to be talking about... Right. It's not like I'll just completely diverge from this and talk about some other bullshit that's unrelated. No. When does that happen? Anyway, it was my idea for web

addresses and made some suggestions on how it might be utilized. Many years later, while trying to think of new ideas to make the World Wide Web more user-friendly, I had some ideas for search engines and was given the privilege to name one Yahoo! I'm sorry, Yahoo!

That's hard to do, both exclamation point and finger quotes. Yahoo! Before she appeared on the show Crossroads with Def Leppard and performed the song I wrote in 1983, a young girl and her mother were brought to meet me. I was given the opportunity to give her a stage name. Here is our daughter. Name her, please. And I named her Taylor Swift.

The Taylor was named for Elizabeth Taylor, who I met as a teen, and Swift for the author Jonathan Swift. Who I also met as a teen. My beautiful time machine. Also, I wrote the time machine. This would also continue a pattern we started with Shania Twain for Mark Twain. Right. So in the article entitled Designing Windows Logo,

this is the subchapter entitled Designing Windows Logo. Oh, finally. Okay. This is the part about Designing Windows Logo where I explain how I designed the Windows logo. With Michael Jackson and a graphics designer. That's how a party gets started. I designed the Windows logo. It, of course, started with the idea of a window pane.

I remember the conversation with Steve Wozniak about test patterns, which my dad would use while working on televisions. This is when dad taught me about what he called, quote, pixelization or dot pitch on a screen. I didn't invent those. My dad did. So I decided to use primary colors of red, green,

and blue, but was left with one window which was empty. Oh no. The graphics designer knew about the mixing of pigments or dyes, such as in printing. The primaries normally used are cyan, magenta, and yellow.

The yellow was added to the design. That's how that yellow got in there. I led him to a better color called yellow. Luckily, Pearl Jam was listening while I said this. Thank you for settling that 10-year bet I had with everyone I ever met about how the yellow got in the Microsoft Windows logo. Oh, God. Later on, Coldplay was inspired by my Microsoft Windows logo

to come up with their hit song, Yellow. While I was saying that, I said, oh, look at the clock. And they said, Yellow. While I was saying that, I said, oh, look at the clock. And they said, hey. Many years later, Bill Gates was asked to come see me again. Hey, Bill Gates, you need to go visit that crazy lady again. She just keeps asking for you, Bill. God damn it.

She's throwing her feces everywhere. It's terrible. And I sang a song, a new song I had just written Love the way you lie This would go on to become a duet between Eminem and Rihanna This was after Bill Gates was publicly beating me And then we had a public split And then we got back together

You know Bill Gates and Eminem hang out a lot Was this before or after you got into Linux? Shut up about Linux, dog. Boots! Boots, I worked very hard on this, and I have a choice of pieces made just for you. Would you

like to read the article on Blackstreet, or the different article on Blackstreet? the different article on Blackstreet? Oh my god! Different article on Blackstreet. The different one, of course. Alright. This is the article entitled

No Diggity. It is a song. Guys, this is the greatest day of my life. No Diggity. The whole time you read, I'm going to go, mm-hmm. You know, I've got to say, this is a visual thing, so it won't translate to people listening, but I just love every time we open an article, I never, from the title, I can never tell what the picture's going to be.

Right. Perry Como. This is an article on Blackstreet, so therefore you're looking at Perry Como. And a dachshund. By the way, the other article, just in case you were curious, the other article about Blackstreet is entitled, I am Kid Rock! Sure.

I love that Blackstreet song. Of course it is. Right. Sure. I love that Blackstreet song. Of course it is. One of the albums in my parents' record collection had been Como's Golden Records, the songs of which would inspire me while writing over the years. One such song was the very popular Hot Diggity Dog Ziggity Boom, written by Al Hoffman and Dick Manning. While working with Michael Jackson, I came up with the song No Diggity Dog Ziggity Boom, written by Al Hoffman and Dick Manning. Okay. While working with Michael Jackson, I came up with the song No Diggity,

which sampled Grandma's Hands by R&B hitmaker Bill Withers. One of my favorite songs by Withers was the popular Use Me, which I would also use as an inspiration while writing songs. So Michael Jackson co-wrote No Diggity? He likes the way you work it. No. That makes sense. No, I wrote it while I was working with Michael Jackson co-wrote No Diggity? He likes the way you work it. No. That makes sense. No, I wrote it while I was working with Michael Jackson. Oh.

Behind his back. Unrelated. Okay, sure. Yeah. Hey, what are you writing over there? Yeah, and then I named Coolio. I named him after the sound a pigeon makes. Nothing, Michael.

No way. Hey, I just want to see what you're writing over there. It looks pretty good. No. Give me a loan. Hey, come on. Come on. We're writing over there. It looks pretty good. No! Give me a loan! Hey, come on. Come on, we're friends here. Come on, come over here.

Michael, stop copying off of me! Oh my god. I saw no. What's the other word there? Come on. I also loved Withers' songs, Ain't No Sunshine and Lean On Me. Great. Good.

Sure. We had already named the boy group the Backstreet Boys, and I decided to name the group Blackstreet. So Backstreet Boys preceded Blackstreet. Yeah. Okay. Right, yeah. Another argument settled. Good.

That checks out. Use of the lyrics. Unless time is linear, that story checks out perfectly. Which featured the artists I gave the stage names of, Dr. Dre and Queen Penn. Queen Penn, I've heard of, but it's Dr. Dre. I'm going to have to look that up. First Backstreet Boys, then Blackstreet, then Dr. Dre, in that order.

Yes. Okay. You got it. Some of my lyrics will be bleeped out in the song. Not to them being cuss words, but the possibility some might find them offensive. Ah, totally different things. This was my decision after talking with Dr. Dre,

who questioned my motives. It actually came from my discussions with Michael Jackson and inspired his smashing the car with offensive words such as KKK in the music video for Black or White. There's also connection with the music video's marionette resembling former Nike spokesman Little Penny. The artists I work with are not only

helping to promote the former Victoria's Secret Tyra Banks used in the Nike commercial, but also professional basketball player Anthony Dion Hardaway. Oh, okay, so they created Little Penny, the puppet, before Anthony Hardaway came about. We got the stupid puppet. Oh, hey! You know, before I came up puppet before they before Anthony Hardaway came about we got the stupid puppet I get oh hey you know yeah

before I came up with the idea of Anthony Hardaway and I like I like the Victoria's Secret Tyra Banks rather than the regular Tyra Banks that one's a lot more fun yeah yeah it's a it's a different you know comes in a

different box yeah she gets a different gun the accessories are really fun. Exactly. Hey! Oh, alright. Got to back it up. Come on. Hardaway would be given the nickname Penny, which we used as a character

name in the film Dirty Dancing. Penny was not only the name of the girl who invited me to the Def Leppard concert in 1983, but also the name of my first pet, who was a name for being the color of the copper penny. Oh my god. I would also make up the song Booty Call, which sampled other songs I loved. Atomic Dog, 1982, by George Clinton, and Heartbreaker, 1983, by Zappa.

Zappa Pop. Okay. You know, I just picture her wall being like that, you know, the string connecting things The string, the newspaper clippings Yeah, except instead of regular newspaper clippings, it's things from Teen Beat It's all held up with chewed bubble gum Really? I just like to thank Lemon for letting me say, hot diggity dog ziggity boom

You're welcome That's why I picked that one, actually I'd just like to thank Lemon for letting me say hot diggity dog ziggity boom. You're welcome. That's why I picked that one, actually. She's actually made a paper wasp nest out of, you know, old music magazines. She sleeps in it at night. And that paper wasp nest is inside her head now. Hey, Jimmy Franks. Yes, sir.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say Jimmy Franks I meant to say Amy Lee We're all Amy Lee's here I wanted to thank you We're all Amy Lee's here I wanted to thank you as a fan of comedy I wanted to thank you for inventing so much different comedy, like comedic characters

that I enjoy so much. My tentacles run deep through all facets of the entertainment industry. All that tentacle-related comedy that you do. No, I always say that about you, Jimmy. Let me tell you. Oh, go ahead. I'm just saying I always say that about you, Jimmy. Your tentacles run deep throughout the entertainment industry.

I'd like to take this opportunity to share with you an anecdote about the kids in the hall. Okay. After the school holidays, our new high school was finished and we moved in. It was 1984 and my 16th birthday was coming up. There were some strange men from a strange planet and they... Michael Hutchins was there. At the beginning... Oh, shit.

Damn it. At the beginning of the school year, I tapped to take over passing out the absentee sheets to each of the teachers during my study hall from a friend who made the cheer squad. I was handing out the absentee sheets when a tornado drill was called. While walking between the students lined up against the wall, of course, many were not taking it seriously. Friends of mine started singing the Pure Prairie League song, Amy, to me. The one song that I did not write. She didn't write the songs by George Clinton or Bill Withers either. She didn't write the Perry Como song.

Yeah. When approached to name a new comedy act, I remembered the day my friends sang to me and named them Kids in the Hall. This consisted of comedians Dave Foley, Kevin MacDonald, Bruce McCulloch, Mark McKinney, and Scott Thompson. Well, that's the five members, so this story checks out perfectly. Yeah, well, she didn't name them all correctly.

All adds up. Over the years, many of the stupid things I did while making up songs started appearing in skits on Saturday Night Live. Huh. I talked about stupidly bobbing my head while making up the song All Night Long, which would be recorded by Billy Squire. stupidly bobbing my head while making up the song all night long, which would be recorded by Billy Squire. The Roxbury Guys came about after I remarked how inept many of the musicians

actually are when it came to females. I'm used that if they were not in a band, they wouldn't have a chance in hell of having sex. Michael Hutchence even used a pickup line on me after we met. Of course, picking up females is why many guys do get into bands. I can imagine Michael Hutchence, even outside of a band,

would have a real hard time picking up girls. Yep. That's why he was so depressed. Yeah, I mean, skinny, good-looking, liked drugs. He really had no in. Much of the narcissistic behavior of the Roxbury guys came from many years of watching Joe Elliott of Def Leppard. There were many times he would stare at himself in a mirror

and had been known to stare at himself in a poster I had taped onto the back of my bedroom door. So it was a reflective poster? Only the one posted on her bedroom door. I'm confused. You are the star. He's just there, hey, this mirror's broken. I didn confused. You are the star. He's just there. Hey, this mirror's broken.

I didn't know if you knew that. God damn it, Joe Elliott. Get out of my bedroom or I'm going to tear that poster down. I'm confused. Why would even Joe Elliott want to look at a picture of Joe Elliott? It was Joe who ordered a poster of actor Maxwell Caulfield who appeared in Grease 2 to be taken down and Def Leppard put up in my room. I order you. You no longer control this room.

Kurt Cobain would take me to the store to purchase the teen magazines where we found many of the posters. Oh, my God. Yeah. Wait. So Kurt Cobain would take you to buy the teen magazines. Oh my god, this one has Mel Leak in it. Isn't he dreamy? And then Amy Lee walked up and looked at the poster and said,

Oh, here they are now, entertainers. And Kurt Cobain was like, say. That gives me an idea. This kid's got juice. And then I said, rape me. Oh, never mind. Joe's jealousy of my feelings for Michael Hutchence, he also took out on me and Michael. Steve Wozniak,

co-founder of Apple, and I discussed how we might start coming up with... What are you talking about? No, no, no. He's doing it right. No need for a segue. We're good. I like that she's broken it up into chapters. Okay.

Steve Wozniak, co-founder of Apple, and I discussed how we might start coming up with ideas for a machine to send documents over a telephone line and eventually with a goal to design a machine that one could upload pictures and documents onto a computer. Okay. Okay. The Woz asked how he might go about... It was a computer. Okay. Okay. The Waz asked how he might go about... The Waz asked how he might go about designing the machine. We discussed the design

of a copier, and this led into the design of what I call a fax machine. Which you think is uploading a picture to a computer. Wait, wait. This is the important thing.

This is where the making copies skit came about. Oh. Okay. All right, all right. Oh. So the actual copier was a means to an end. While you were inventing the copier, you said, one day Rob Schneider will have a career. I got this killer idea for an SNL skit, but we have to invent a piece of technology first.

Oh, okay. Hey, what you doing over there? Teleporting? No, that won't work. Hang on. Rich, making lithographs. I don't know. Using the ditto machine.

Cellular telephones Maybe later Now you know We've sort of danced around the subject Of Kurt Cobain But I don't know how the song Smells like teen spirit came about yet I told you earlier

We've predicted everything that's happening in this episode Boots I told you earlier. We've predicted everything that's happening in this episode. Boots. Boots. Okay. Yeah. Smells like teen spirit. In 1978, we moved to Mesquite, Texas,

and I attended fifth grade at J.C. Riggle Elementary. My brother attended North Mesquite High, and my mother worked at Texas Instruments. Just breaking off briefly to say, if you go to thefpl.us you will see some really great photos. Sorry, continue. And then a drawing of that great photo. Which looked

very, very dissimilar. Maybe she had some weird surgery since then. Yeah, to straighten out that leg She was known as the Flamingo Girl up until then To straighten out her legs and unstraighten her shoulders And get bigger eyes Let's talk about this more Alright

My mother enrolled me in piano lessons And in cheerleading for the Pee Wee football team That was once called The Rockets So in honor of my football team, I wrote the song Rocket, released on Death by Fire, 1987 hysteria album. In 1983, I started

writing a song called Tick Tock Without Seas. Wow, that had to percolate for a long time. You started that piece of shit in 1983? She went through a lot of different name changes. Doesn't it reference modern shit the whole time? Did you have to keep rewriting it?

That's the thing about Amy Lee. She's able to roll with that. She woke up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy, but she didn't know what P. Diddy was, but she still rolled with it. She still wrote the song. That's the thing. She wrote that in the song, and then she had to come up with P. Diddy to make the song relevant. So she sat on that. It's strategy.

Sorry, I sat on that. Amy Lee's all about timing. On a trip to Madrid, Spain, where I met the girl group Rock Goddess, who was touring with Def Leppard. In a meeting, the lead singer of Rock Goddess, she was picked up on my... What?

Oh, sorry. She picked up on my southern accent and told me that Mick Jagger's girlfriend was from the south. I pulled Kurt off to the side of the stage and sang to him. Kurt, come here! Instead of just writing it down? Now the dudes are lining up, cause they hear we got swagger, but we kick them to the curb

unless they look like Mick Jagger. curb unless they looked like Mick Jagger. It was soon after this that Mick and his then-girlfriend, model Jerry Hall, decided to say Hall attended North Mesquite High School. My brother's school in Texas, even though she dropped out to start her modeling career.

Oh my god, she totally stole the high school from her brother. These first lines of TikTok also inspired InXS to name their album Kick. Say it, say it. Oh, come on. She even has it in bold. It's obvious.

Say it. I would continue to use Kick in lyrics as well. I would continue using words. They weren't going to stop me. No, you can only use this word once. Kurt Cobain, who was spending a lot of time in Alabama at this point, went not on tour with Def Leppard.

Why? When he read about basketball player Charles Barkley, who was attending Auburn University going pro in 1983. Barkley grew up in Leeds, Alabama, and not far from where I grew up in Trustville. He was also born on February 20th, and Kurt Cobain chose Barkley's birthday as his public birthday.

It's not his secret birthday that's between him and his god. Yes. This is why Barkley would be asked to appear with Nirvana on SNL. Is that really the reason? So this is what it's like inside of the mind of a schizophrenic. Okay.

I don't know what you're talking about. In about 1984 or 1985, Courtney Love dyed her red... I'm starting this paragraph over. Yeah. In about 1984 or 1985, Courtney Love dyed her red hair... sorry, her hair red.

I'm having a hard time with this. Oh, red hair trips up boots every time. It's okay. Yeah, I know. It had the picture to the right made with Kurt, along with a girl wearing an Auburn University t-shirt standing next to Kurt. I was there, of course. I'm not basing this off the photo to the right.

Yeah. It was also Charles Barkley's name who inspired me to name the duo Gnarls Barkley after writing the song Crazy. The duo was composed of the artist Brian Joseph Burton, commonly professionally known as Danger Mouse, and Thomas DiCarlo Calloway,

known professionally with the stage name I gave him of CeeLo Green. Auburn University has the war cry of War Eagle, but their mascot is Obby, and the team is referred to as the Tigers. The nickname which Michael Hutchins first gave me in 1983.

I have a lot of nicknames, don't I? Hey, the Tigers, bring me a... It was the nickname he gave her breasts, you know? Release the tigers! Yeah, and that's where Michael Jackson and I came up with the nickname of Tiger for Eldrick Tauntwood. So by now she's Amy Tommy Tiger Gnarls Barkley Lee, I think? Yes.

Okay. Yeah. Sure. Another reason Kurt chose Barkclay's birthday is because my mother and grandfather were both born in early March, making them both Pisces. Oh, God, here we go. It was my mother's birthday of March 4th that Kurt chose

as the day of his fake-failed suicide attempt in 1994 in Rome. This is why I wrote, Eyes like a Pisces, in the lyrics of Heart-Shaped Box, recorded by Nirvana before he attempted suicide. Attempted? Attempted to fake

his suicide, yeah. It was a fake suicide attempt. So he ended up blowing his head off by accident. No, no, that was fake too. What a horrible mistake. It was fake, but then he accidentally did it. It's like a double negative. Fake failed, so

it was... God, forget it. I give up. It's like a double negative fake failed, so it was... God. Forget it. I give up. It's like a snake eating its tail. Anyway, the lyrics, she's overboard and self-assured, was a reference to the cruise on Carnival Country by Labor Day Weekend 1983 on the Mardi Gras. I'm sorry.

Go ahead. She's over aboard, yeah. I'm sorry. I forgot I gave up. Jesus. In which I stood on the railing at the bow of the ship and that the crew thought I was about to jump overboard. I'm sure that actually happened. Probably.

They just didn't rescue her. They didn't try to. Hey, jump, bitch! Do it! I had talked to all of them about my song lyrics ideas and for some reason they were chanting for me to jump. I don't know why. Oh, God, that crazy lady's on the ground to jump now.

This, of course, inspired House of Pain to write a song about... Go for it. This was used as the scene in the 97 film Titanic, and in the music video for Celebrity Skin that I wrote and recorded by Hole. Good. Yep. Uh-huh. Yeah, sure.

Yep. Oh, no, I know a dirty word. Was inspired by the album Class Clown by George Carlin, which my brother had in his record collection. Here We Are No, Entertain Us. Here We Are No, Entertain Us. Here We Are No. Was a reference to Natalie Wood in the film Gypsy,

where she performed the song Let Me Entertain You. Yeah. Yeah, because it has the word entertain in it. And was to draw a connection of me writing the song Gypsy, recorded by Fleetwood Mac. Double R. Yeah. Okay.

It was Andrew Ferris of In Excess and Natalie Wood's names, which Kurt Cobain came up with the stage name of his friend Andrew Wood. Sure, yeah. So he just has a friend and he needed a stage name for him. All right, I know your name's Joe, but I'm going to need to call you Andrew whenever I reference you, which is all the fucking time.

And would later go by the stage name of Lane, then Lane Stanley. Oh, I'm sorry. Formerly of Alice in Chains. This is also why Kurt wrote the song Wood, a reference to Natalie and Tiger Woods. Sometimes spelled Wood? Sometimes.

Only idiots do it that way. As in, why would I do that? Why would you do that? Recorded by Alice in Chains. Oh, Jesus. Kurt would also name the studio London Bridge after I wrote the song London Bridge. It was falling down.

Oh, that would be recorded by the artist I named Fergie. Of course you named Fergie. The lyrics of Hello, Hello, Hello, How Low was a reference to me writing the song Hello, recorded by Evanescence, and Low, which would be recorded by Flo Rida. Flo Rida. Damn.

Finally, a solid connection between Nirvana and Flo Rida. And there we go. Around about an hour of the liberal Amy Lee-run media. And there we go. Around about an hour of the liberal Amy Lee run media. Boots, what'd you learn this week? We have found the sweetest intersection of narcissism and delusions. Sweet as in like rad or sweet as in adorable? Yeah, as in just totally wicked awesome. Now, how is that?

I believe it seems like she's pretty convinced that all this is true, right? Yeah, I mean, she's updating this daily, so yeah. The world that is inside her mind must be the most amazing place. I'm a little jealous because I go through my day-to-day life with a lot of self-doubt. Life with a lot of self-doubt. I follow a lot of conversations that I have with people with kind of like self-flagellation and why did I say that stupid thing. It must be nice to go through your entire life knowing that you are the epicenter of everyone's cultural experience and that all you need to do is convince them of that

so that they'll thank you afterwards. Yeah. Well, as far as she knows, she has a lot to be proud of and good for her. Really good for you, Amy Lee, not the singer of Evanescence.

Although, although maybe, I mean, I'm not sure if she's copped to that one or not. Like, is she actually responsible for Evanescence? It's very confusing. But we've got a website, and you should go to it.

In fact, we've got two. The first one, thefpl.us. That's where the podcast lives. You can go there. You can submit stuff like this or whatever other sort of Internet crazy you happen across. Submit that to us because we always are looking for new things to read out loud. Yeah, absolutely. And just so you know, the F Plus website was created when Kurt Cobain graded Amy Lee's high school geography paper

and gave it an F, but then she argued the point. Okay. That'll do. Go to ball pit. Bye bye.