The Fighter & The Kid - Ep. 822: Jeff Dye's Weird Donald Trump Dream

Episode Date: August 18, 2022

Jeff Dye fills in for Brendan on this episode. He and Bryan get into why crypto enthusiasts are always broke, why Jeff doesn't trust himself to gamble, a crash course in Luke Rockhold's career in anticipation of his hit with Paulo Costa for UFC's most handsome fighter, the last time they were truly scared, their favorite comics, the repercussions of faking it on social media and the weirdest dreams they've ever had.  DraftKings: If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) (IL/IN/MI/NJ/PA/WV/WY), 1-800-NEXT STEP (AZ), 1-800-522-4700 (CO/NH), 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org/chat (CT), 1-800-BETS OFF (IA), 1-877-770-STOP (7867) (LA), 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY), visit OPGR.org (OR), call/text TN REDLINE 1-800-889-9789 (TN), or 1-888-532-3500 (VA). 21+ (18+ WY). Physically present in AZ/CO/CT/IL/IN/IA/LA/MI/NJ/ NY/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY only. N/A in NH/OR/ON. One per new customer. Min. $5 deposit and wager. $200 issued as eight (8) $25 free bets. Ends 8/20/22. SGP Opt-in req. Max. wager $10. Max winnings vary. Min 3-leg SGP. SGP must lose to receive up to $10 Free Bet award. Exp. prior to start of final UFC 277 fight. See http://draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

MMA fans UFC 278 has an action packed fight card capped off by the anticipated Usman versus Edwards rematch. It's finally here. Throw it down and grab your own epic victory with DraftKring Sportsbook. The official sports betting partner of UFC. This Saturday new customers can bet just $5 and get $200 in free bets instantly, winner lose. And if that's not enough action, you can also get a $10 risk-free, same game parlay, just combine multiple bets, like which fighter will come out on top, and how long the fight will last,

and a bunch of other different ways you can do that. So download the DraftKing Sportsbook app now, use promo code fighter, bet $5 on UFC 278, and get $200 in free bets instantly that's code fighter this Saturday a draft king sports book the official sports betting partner of UFC minimize and eligibility restrictions apply see show notes for detail. Yeah, yeah, we gon' keep it movin' like it's never gonna end When it was brinnin', when it was brightin' When it was just talkin' to friends, we got the kid callin' on the left With the fighter on the right, hey, had to do it right Cause we comin' at you live, back with the team

Had to keep it OG, my CTV Yeah, had to do it Yes, we did, cause we back at 8K It's the fighter in the kid It's the fighter in the kid Back at 8K, it's the fighter in the kid It's the fighter in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids Fightin' in the kids The fightin' in the kids Back at out Yeah back from the heady got it's very tall and good looking up in here. We got Jeff die taking over for Mr. Brennan shot taking over you look drunk. No, you look good dude last time It's some people say this guy he looks

Hungover I said I'm gonna be a little lady because it gives me more time to get the bags under my eyes under control Get all those ladies out of my house. Yeah, get out of here. I gotta go record a podcast. Dude, fucking in sports. That's what this guy's about. Fucking sports and coffee. And be trying to sound cool. Yeah. You know what that's what we're talking about before we started.

I understand. I see you got a little merch going. Oh, no, this is a, this is not mine. Don't you have a pitching jersey or something or? What do you mean? I don't know. It looks like it like on your Instagram, you have some merch. I don't have any merch. All right, neither do I. You and I, but I don't sell anything.

I sell CDs, that's how old school I am. Ha! You do? There's one day I turn into an old guy, you know? It's just like, ah, CDs, they're like, that's out. It was like, it was fine yesterday. I've been quoting your joke, you have a great joke, which is, why does everybody who's in the crypto have three roommates? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Nobody ever rich talks to me about crypto or NFTs It's always like a skateboarder like an Uber driver on my dumb friend and as like three roommates Like you gotta get into crypto. I was like I'm not taking any financial advice from you dude That's a hundred percent rope everybody. I know super rich. They go like this. They go. Yeah, yeah, I play around That's it or they say this is the best thing a rich guy can say. You wouldn't understand, and I'd go, yeah, you're probably right. They go, I'm really rich with my finance guys do it all. I go, that's, maybe when I get a bunch of money,

I'll have finance guys. I asked my brother-in-law who is a retired 40, and I said, I had some money, I go, well, so how would I invest? He goes, no, no, no, he just goes, no, no, no. Don't worry about it. It's too much. When I'll say, I had some money, I go, well, so how would I invest? He goes, no, no, he just goes, no, no. Don't worry about it. It's too much. When I get some friends too, they'll be like, yeah,

just put a, I just got a little bit of money from my grandpa's life insurance, think about putting in the stocks and stuff. I was like, oh, how much money is it? I'm probably gonna put a few hundred. I was like, that's not. What are you, what are you, a few hundred in a stock? 100,000.

Yeah. It's like, I'm not at least being the thousands if you're gonna invest in something, not hundreds. Everything is like that though. Like if you ask a really good tennis player or a boxer, like, hey, when I transition here, I can't dig to the body. They look at you and they go,

I mean, what do you ask in me? You, it's like, hey, it's what, when I do stand up, you know, if I've been doing it for 10 minutes, when I do stand up, should I? I'm not answering any of your questions. Do it for 10 years and then come talk to me. I can't help you.

Yeah, yeah, I can't teach any tricks. You just gotta do it. You gotta do it. Yeah, yeah, in the financial stuff, it's like, sorry, do you think people get MBAs or become like, that this is like a 10 minute conversation now your expert in stocks? That's why I don't gamble.

Because like, I'm too, one one I'm too cheap to gamble, because I'll be like, all right, what if I put a thousand dollars down on the bangles to win this Super Bowl against the Rams? My guys, you'll make, if they win, you'll get about 400 bucks. I have to risk a thousand. No, and I get 400 bucks.

And they're like, like, yeah, that's how it works. You go, this is terrible. Terrible. That's not worth the risk. And I would've lost all that money. You guys know how that would turn out. If you were to gabbles, do you think you'd do well? It's not terrible at it.

I've never been, the only thing I've ever predicted is that Johnny Mincell was gonna be garbage. And I predicted that, like, I've been able to predict a few of the world's serious winners, but they weren't real gambles. You know, they was like, oh, the Yankees are good. Why do you think Johnny Mincell was gonna be garbage? I thought he was gonna be amazed

because he's undersized and he's a terrible work ethic. And if you're gonna be that small, you better work your ass off. You better be like Russell Wilson or Flutey or like Drupre's. You can't be small and out partying every night and acting like a jackass and also- Is he doing that in college? Yeah, he was.

Yeah, like anybody that knew him was always talking about how funny he is and how he's always drinking and dressing up like Scooby-Doo and shit. And but the dog, was the dog Scooby-Doo? Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right, good. And then, that's mixing up the kid. Was the dog Scooby-Doo and Shaggy? But what's he doing now, Galle?

Oh, but the thing was like also in college you'd watch guys just barely miss him when they're trying to sack him. Yeah. And just barely. Like Johnny Manza was barely evading these guys. Now, those guys don't hold a candle to like NFL player. Those NFL guys don't, they're not gonna miss.

Yeah. They're not gonna miss. So I was like, Johnny Manza. And they're gonna, especially as a quarterback, they're gonna figure you out quickly. In seven games, they got all your tendencies. I gotta say I've been watching UFC because I became boys with you guys.

Gosh, there's so many fighters. Yeah. How do you keep, I mean, I thought that, I don't just stick to the top guys. I'll just stick to the top guys. Or just watch the pre, like I watch the pre-limbs for entertainment, but you get to see the narratives. But I think I'm gonna find this as a second. There's so many guys, and we're opening these cards

on the other podcast here. We got 12 packs of Jeff Dye. I'm opening all these UFC cards. I don't know any of them. I'm going to wear his patty. Where's the Connor? It takes time. It takes time.

But think about this way. It's not just fighting like what's fun about watching fighters at the high level is they have to figure each other out, right? So every each fighter that comes to the game plan, but they also, the top guys also can improvise and do incredible things on the fly, right? And just let's second time. But for the most part, they know you have weaknesses. Your team knows that you might not be as good a wrestler,

you might not be as strong in the clinch, you may not be, you know, whatever it is, right? And so your job is to solve the puzzle in front of you. It's like, you have to solve the fight. Does that make sense? That does, yeah. Once you watch that, then you're looking at it differently. You're like, oh, the strategy there.

Like if I watch boxing and I watch, like I'm dying to see Bud Crawford fight Earl Spence. Earl Spence is so strong. He's got such good understanding of distance and he's just a beast. But Bud Crawford is just kind of a genius. Like he can fight from, he can do both sides. He's just really hard to figure out and somehow he figures out your pattern. He'll figure out what you're doing.

He's like chess. Yes. He's just a better chess player. I watch it like a, you know, I body shame in them first. You know, I look at their bodies and I go a terrible body. Oh, what a look a better chess player. I watch it like a, you know, I body shame in them first. You know, I look at their bodies and I go, terrible body. Oh, what a look at that, stupid tattoo.

And then, then I pick based on who looks cooler. And then, usually, I'm wrong. Yeah, but I watch it like a woman would watch sports. I still do that. I've been watching you have seen since the beginning and I still do that. I body shame I'm terrible. Oh, yeah, I wonder who he's dating. You know, I watch it like a woman. Like a woman watches sports. If a woman's with you, you have to see since the beginning and I still do that. All right, body shame, I'm terrible. Oh, yeah, I wonder who he's dating.

I watch it like a woman. Like a woman watches sports. If a woman's with you, you have them back. Who do you think is gonna win? Just based on body. Right. And that's how I do it, but then that's also why it'd be a terrible gambler.

You gotta do your homework like Calon. You know, he's going, oh, this guy does this and this guy don't do it. I don't do any of that. I go, when are we eating? Is this match almost over? Well, this Saturday. Oh, that's a lot of blood.

This Saturday we have the best looking, two best looking guys fighting, the winner we eat is this magic most of this Saturday that's a lot of blood this Saturday we have the best looking to best looking guys fighting polychausta and look rock hold are you remember what's a name of Dan hooker I thought that guy was going to win for sure and these every bone in his skeleton got broken that was terrible to watch and you guys like friends with all these guys must be even harder for you some of them friends with Luke for sure that that's Polo Costa. He's just a fucking.

He's jacked. He's just he's no Ted. You never see that. You never see that. You never see that. I do. What do you got? Oh yeah, a lot never mind. Jerry Blossom and some birds. I don't know.

I'm going to. That guy's looking at him. Because you're Hawaiian, right? No, what does this guy's deal? Polo Costa. Mac pies that guys look at him because you're Hawaiian right? No, what is this guys deal? Apollo costume. Yeah, he's just he's fighting look he is fighting Luke Rock hold take a look at the rock I like the name rock hold. That's a strong name Luke Rock hold to hand some good God. This guy's gonna win I think that's Luke Rock hold couple hands. He's straight white and male. I know who I'm rooting for Rockle couple hands. He's straight white and male. I know who I'm rooting for

I'm bet on that sis. Yeah, that's sis male Against that getting Brazilian trans It is a way to I have the only group. I'm not allowed to root for him He was a fucking he was a fucking polar model. Oh, there you go That must be rare when you're a fighter guy to have any kind of modeling face. Yeah Because you get punched in it a lot. Yeah. He's one of them. He's by far. I'm not real.

I don't really like that image. One of the best ever to do it. The other photo you had was pretty cool, but this one is weird. When also I do this pose, right? Like he's much stronger than me. But this is what I do when I have my shirt off. I'm always like in a position where like my abs,

you know, like I'll, he's got his arms locked so we can pop the traps, you know? It's like, it looks a little too intentional there. Yeah. Oh, he doesn't even need to. He's got big old muscles. That's just what he looks like. Yeah.

I don't, I had no matter what I do, I don't have any of that. It doesn't seem like a guy that would fuck your ex girlfriend. And he doesn't seem like a guy, you go, this guy. Well, your girl, your girl will fuck him. First of all, your girl will go. That's what I said. Well, your girl your girl will fuck him first of all your girl Well, that's what I said. Well, slide into his dams And then if you have nothing to say about it because you'll give you a good beat. Oh, I'll have plenty to say about it

True. Who's this chick with them right there? I don't know. I model and girl. She's pretty hot Well, Jeff, you you're funny and you're taller than me. Yeah, I'll do all right. Yeah, slide into her dams Jesus, dude. What's with these muscles? Wow, I got Mickey laugh I'm sliding into her dms. Jesus, dude. What's with these muscles? Yeah. Wow. That guy make you laugh? That is one of my favorite things, brand Tobler just always say, he's like, man, we should be on the,

I would be on the bachelor, I'd kill it. And I was like, what makes you think that? These are like the best looking people in the world. The bachelor cast just based on looks, you know? They want you to be a garbage person inside. Have you ever asked you to do it? Yeah, a bunch of times. I just don't want to do it.

And the, it's no money, first of all. And then also they make you look like an idiot. And then also I don't want to all fight over one gal. You're a comic. I'm stupid. But by Buddy Branson, we would do great on there because long after these guys' abs are gone, we're still interesting and fun and funny.

Like most of those guys are way hotter, but they don't have a personality. They're not, you can't beat a comic. No hanging out, having fun. There's no way. No way. They ever heard a regular person's stories. It's true. Good God. Most boring shit. Yeah, the FBI is looking at my I went to Germany once you go shut up.

I went to Germany once he got shut up. I went to Germany. He was all this stores. Oh, here comes that Germany story again. Yeah. And I'm nice. I'm like, yeah, that's Germany. He's just, but I'm not interested in them. Let's take a break, Jeff.

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That's helix helix sleep.com slash fighter with helix better sleep starts now. Listen, you like sports. Love sports. You like money and you want to get into the UFC. This is your chance. sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports.. Love sports.. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. Love sports. pick of no i don't i i i i i think uesman i don't bet against the champion but i'm words has a good chance of doing something here mma fans ufc two seventy eight has an action packed fight card capped off by the anticipated uesman versus edwards rematch it's finally here throw down and

grab your own epic victory with draft king sportsbook the official sports betting partner of the UFC. This Saturday, new customers can bet just $5 and get $200 in free bets instantly, winner lose. And if that's not enough action, you can also get a $10 risk-free, same-game parlay, just combine multiple bets, like which fighter will come out on top, and how long the fight will last, and a bunch of other different ways you can do that. So download the draft king sportsbook app now use promo code fighter

bet five dollars on UFC 278 and get two hundred dollars in free bets instantly that's code fighter this Saturday a draft king sportsbook The official sports betting partner of UFC minim restrictions, apply, see show notes for detail. New guy, I think some cultures like Boston, New York, you tell, they're good storytellers because you don't get away with it. Because you tell a boring story when you're growing up in New York, Philadelphia, fucking Jersey, Boston, you get stopped. You start telling a story that's boring, guys go,

hey bro, this is fuck, is there a point? You get killed before you even get out of the gates. Yeah, actually, I get this like a fun subject. When's the last time you were really afraid? Like when you go, I'm scared right now. And when's the last time you were scared? That's a really good question. I was thinking about it.

I know, I know, I know. I just started remembering like anytime a girl tells me a story about how she's scared, I'm like, man, it must be terrible being a chick. Cause girls, like a girl, the girls, girls, their whole lives, they're scared. Yeah. Every day, it must be terrible to be a woman. I'll go, they're going, oh my God, you won't believe what happened. I go, what? I was in the elevator and there was a guy in there and I'm like, yeah, I was like, that's it. I was like, that's the fucking story.

You're scared? Because a man was near you in society. Steve Burns doesn't joke like that. It's like his girl called him. You never guess what almost happened. Nothing because it was almost. Right. Yeah, they'll be scared just because that guy's walking down the street

and they're walking down the street. They're like, and that's a terrifying story for a woman. The lie, a year ago, my buddy, we were in the South of France. Thank you. And he said, let's go. It was nighttime and he goes, it was raining. And the waves were huge.

I'm not a surfer. I don't know the ocean that well. I don't like the ocean at night. And the currents and beurites are crazy. It's where a lot of big surfers go. So he goes, you want to go out and I go, fuck it. Yeah. Nice.

And I just went out at night. Yeah, and I went out in the water. Yeah. And it was, well, it was dusk. So it was like, you know, but the waves were so fucking big and I couldn't, I couldn't get out. I couldn't, I couldn't get past the wave. Well, I was getting past the wave

but then I was really out there. And now these waves and I'm having a really focused on catching the wave at the right time. Right. With my board. And a guy had to come and fucking save me. The fucking server had to get my line and told me out to even further where I wasn't getting the fuck off.

You bit off more than you could chew, but. I did, but you can't serve it. But it was raining, the waves were big, and I was like, I'm just gonna do this because it scares the fuck out. Oh, and that's the last time you're scared. I think so. I think so, this guy was trying to seduce you too. Yeah, he did that too. Yeah, he's the last time you're scared. I think so. I think so.

I was trying to seduce you too. Yeah, he did that too. Yeah, he's like, I was super scared when he's on top of it. We're in the South of France together. You want to go into the ocean while it rains. You're like, are you trying to fund me? Yeah. Yep.

I'm the board. All right, I guess I'm going to hold that ball. Because I could have to somebody say to a lady, like, you know, who cares? It's just raining. It rains fun. And then it goes like, he is fun. This board's hard on my deck. Why am I wearing pants? Why are you over there on your own board? Come over to my board.

Why are you using me? I'm trying to think the last time I was afraid. You guys, Chin, it was the last time you're afraid. You can fight and stuff. Mark, you're like a strong guy. I don't imagine you being afraid of anything, but you don't know, Chew. Lions or something. You know, I'm also another thing is you don't know, Chad. Lions or something. No, I'm, I'm, you know, also another thing is, you don't put yourself in positions to be scared. You know, you're part of like being in a doll's like, I used to fall all the time doing skating. Now I just don't do that.

You know what I mean? Right. As far as injuries go, but I will think of the last demo of skate. It's tough to think of. That's how cool it is to be a dude. I will say this, anytime I see cops,

I get a little scared. You do. Like driving, you're like, oh, my, you know, it's not that a factor, you know, any time I see cops, I get a little scared. You do. Like driving, you're like, oh my, you know, it has an effect or, you know, when you're getting arrested, it's just. I'm pretty brazen about cops. When you think, I'm almost cocky around cops. Not on the streets, but in cars.

Like I treat them like they're my gang. You should. That's part of the responsibility. They're my gang. Yeah, and if a gang member starts acting up, I go, what, take it easier, I call my gang. Yeah. Also my gang is gonna beat your gang Oh, yeah, my guys got helicopter. Yeah, we have German shepherds my gang is gonna win. Let's keep escalating

Government money. He's gonna be awesome. Yeah, I know any budget. That's my gang. I'm afraid of the future Oh, yeah, I'm always afraid of the future because I know. Yeah. I'm always afraid of the future, because I don't know where I fit in it. Do you ever think about where you fit in this new fucking future of ours? Yeah. What do you mean? We're kind of a deep question. I don't know what you mean. I think that if I was telling Eric Griffin this last night, like if I, if I'd have known

the world would be like it is right now, current day, I would have went to school for like editing. I didn't think I'd ever spend my life spending so much time going on at the time codes this and how do I make it sound better here and can you put words on it and clip it down? I'm having the same thoughts. I'm paying all these editor guys, I'm having to do all this, I don't know how to do it.

And also it's like so much of my life is just trying to figure out how to put What I'm good at on the internet You wouldn't want to do it though. Yeah, concentrate on what you do and just have other people do it It takes up so much time well, but also okay. That's good. Yeah, that makes me feel a lot better But also if I was an editor and knew how to edit man, I would never run out of work Yeah, because everybody needs content right in my dumb buddies wife, sorry, he's great, his dumb wife. Even she needs content. She's like, oh, I gotta put up content.

I was like, you're just a lady. She's a cab, but I sing while I cook. And then I eat the food on camera. And I have like a hundred followers. Even she needs to know how to edit. You know, like it's crazy. That, even she needs to know how to edit. You know, like it's crazy. Yeah, that's what it's made.

She is very hot, yeah. I mean, she can get followers in. Yeah, just eating food. Yes, people love watching people eat. That's weird, huh? I love it. You do? Tell them to give a buy followers.

I don't know. I think it's, I used, I one time I bought followers and there was like 10 bucks or something. They gave me like a thousand followers. Yeah. Really? But then they weren't real accounts. So like after a while, like you lose 10 the next day, then like two days later you lose

10, they eventually go away. And then also I've read that, although it's a long time ago, I don't know if it's still true, that Instagram knows when you've bought followers. So then they bury your stuff. Correct. So you get punished a little bit. I think it's bad in general. What a fake followers. So then they bury your stuff. Correct. So you get punished a little bit. I get it's bad in general. I don't want fake followers.

I want a real full lie. Yeah, but engagement. Tansier, because up into your page before, you like proportional to the amount of followers you have, you get a lot of likes, a lot of comments. People engage with your profile. And that's really the number one thing is like, do people look, if you have a million followers

and you're getting a hundred likes and three comments that are all like fire Emogie, nice picture, it looks weird. Also, girls who have three million followers because they show their ass, that's a weird engagement. It is a weird modern time. So it's almost like fake, it's weird.

It is, well I don't, the apps said buy real followers. I didn't know that they were all fake followers. So I don't want fake followers. I don't want the number to be big. I don't want to buy real followers. I don't want don't want fake followers. I don't want the number to be big. I don't want to buy real followers here. I don't want to buy any of them. Yeah, you don't want to buy followers. Yeah, I only did it once a long time ago,

and it was powerful. All of that shit is a slippery slope, but the same thing is like, you know, if you get sponsors that you don't believe in. You know why I did it? Why about those followers? I had an audition for a Netflix show with Carol Burnett, and I knocked out of the park,

even during the like what would be considered like a chemistry read even though it's like reality. It was like we went and did basically like a segment with Carol Burnett. I mean, the same room with Carol Burnett doing this awesome show is basically like me and her are like with these little kids and the kids say the darnedest things in Carol Burnett

like kind of goes back and forth and whatever. And it was down to me, Josh Wolfen, Russell Peters. And the reason Russell Peters got it is because these old people at the network, no offense, looked at his social medias and was like, oh, look how many followers he has. But his thing, I know those old bozos didn't, they didn't go, well let's do some homework

and figure out if they're real followers. They just saw the number and said, whoa, let's give them the things. Russell's followers are real. I know that, but I'm saying, but if I had, they're saying amount of followers. They wouldn't have known if it was fake or real. So that's what made me do it.

And I was like, I'm gonna scam the system here. I'm just gonna try to give this mouth full of the world. But you gotta buy a lot more than a thousand. Yeah,, and there's also that used to probably be a lot more impressive now people will look at engagement know all these little you know Tricks yeah, the app knows the hack so you can't do anything. I don't think Carol Bernat's people know who has real followers or not I was I was in you know obviously into heady this past week and my buddy goes why are you not posting anything? Oh my god I was like fuck dude. I don't want to, but okay. Sounds like you should run your own. Now I was there with my whole family.

I was literally there with my extended family. No, you run your own social medias. Yeah, I mean, what I'm there I do. I lie about that all the time. Well, I'm gonna be like, I DM you and you never saw it. Like I have to show us. And I'm like, oh, I don't run my own, I don't run my own social medias.

There I am, I'm just a liar. Because what I'm doing, I don't run my own do I don't run my own social media's mark. There am I was a lot because what I'm doing I look here you go one time he you face time me twice and both times you're in like a cool place I know like a beautiful set you're like in grease or something Yeah, I love it man. You're like you got a good life. Well, I mean my face is super oblong look at that No, you look good, buddy. Look at this guy. I'm modeling. I'm modeling. Look, this was a joke. I hit a boy. This was a joke. What was it, Chris?

I get it in my eyes. I'm trying to get my... You just got a whole, you just got 10 new followers. It's very natural. Yeah, my hair is... Also look at comedy clubs hitting on you. Why is guys... I'm doing, I'm doing why is guys this tomorrow?

Ah, one show. Actually, do you guys have a lot of followers in Pittsburgh? I don't know, maybe. Well, hopefully you do, because I have a lot of followers in Pittsburgh um maybe yeah, well hopefully you do because I have a show in Pittsburgh this weekend at in clay in Pittsburgh And we've sold about four tickets really for tickets. Why don't you do the improv in Pittsburgh? Because I think I did like their last weekend before they like remodeled whatever. I just have them in back You're at the end-clave theater. In Clayton Pittsburgh, but we need to see you guys. Yeah, August 20th, please come.

Which is what? I don't want them to go, hey man. That's Saturday. We sold four tickets, here's eight bucks. Yeah. Do people know how good you are comedy? Yeah, I don't know. I shouldn't know.

Because anytime I see them. I'm not the see Jeff dying with other people. So that's my best friend. I heard people who came to your show and said they were fucking dying. Well, thanks man. Yeah, it's all I'm good at. Stand up. Yeah, you're really good. Oh, and fucking. Stand up.

Fuckin'. What are you doing? Just making people laugh and fucking. Yeah, Bill Hicks used to always say, man, fuck the audience. Jeff Dye says, fuck the audience. Who's your favorite? Who are your favorite comics? Ever. Yeah. I love Daniel Tosh. I think he's so underrated. I agree with it. I think he's a genius. I did too A lot of the usual suspects are like Shepel and Bill Burr. So I went up to Daniel Tosh with the first time I saw him at the lab factory

Yeah, we're like contemporaries. You know, it's not like sure. I was doing my thing And I came up and I said I think you're the best comic working right now and he goes that's so not true I go no this was about 10 to 10 years ago. Yeah, he won't receive compliments. But I didn't know him and I was like no, I know the difference and I'm telling you I think you're that good. I said standing in Bill Burr about seven years after that.

I think he's incredible. The first time I ever met Daniel Tosh, I went because now we know each other. But I had just moved to LA and I've never seen him. I've never been to the same state as him. And so when I saw him, I went right up to him and I go, hey man, you're a genius. And he goes, no, I'm not.

And he walked right by me and left. That is crazy. Yeah, he doesn't give a fuck. He's brilliant, man. About, I mean, there was a famous comic who I won't mention. And I was talking to Daniel, because Daniel had seen, he liked, I think, Kingdom, I was doing Kingdom and he was talking to Daniel because Daniel had seen he liked I

Think Kingdom I was doing Kingdom and he was a fan of the show where and we were just talking about it I don't know him well, but we're having a great conversation and I've always had great interaction room and Famous comic came and said we should have lunch and he goes oh no, I could never do that I did that I had a three-minute conversation with you about Five years ago and that was way too long. That's what he said. I think Shob has a good story about, I might bot you here,

but Shob's got a story about like, Rogan said to Daniel, he goes, Hey man, you should do, you should come to the podcast and Tosh goes, why? And Joe's like, well, we have a good time and it's fun.

And he's like, no thanks. And just like walked away, like it's just perfect and it's fun. And he's like, no thanks. And he's like, walked away like it's just perfect Daniel Tosh fashion. Daniel does not give a fuck. It's really interesting. He's, because as a guy, I'm always a little bit way more polite because I guys fight.

Yeah. Do you know what I mean? I'm always like, I'm always like, if I'm going to be that way, I have to, either I don't like the guy and I'm going to have to be ready to throw down. I guess that's my old school way of thinking about. Like, I'll never talk behind somebody's back on podcast. Like, you'll never hear me say bad things about somebody

unless I'm gonna say it to their face. Sure, sure, sure. For me, gossip is not my generation. It's not what men do. If I'm gonna say shit about you, I'm gonna say it to your face because I don't like you and I have to be willing to back it up. I guess that's, I'm not saying that that's right, I'm saying that that's how I was raised.

So for me to say something like, say there's a guy out there, I don't like it and I say bad shit about him, that feels like I'm hiding behind a mic, right? And so then I feel like I'm being cowardly. I guess he can't defend himself. I'm guilty of it all the time. Yeah, I'm just I feel like I'm being cowardly. I guess he can't defend himself I'm guilty of it all the time. Yeah, I'm just saying I'm not good at the roasting thing like try to be funny or I'll say I think because that's really what I think

And later someone's like did you say that and I go yeah, that's my bad man Like I did I said like a terrible thing about Owen Benjamin on On Jimmy Doris podcast, but I only did it because they were going in on yeah, yeah I was like all right all joining the you know join in the little reindeer games here so I started saying all this terrible stuff but just jokes they were all like punch line what I was like I was like I heard all benches selling a new his merch now he's selling his his memoirs called mine comp you know just a stupid joke and then I guess he goes off on lots of different. Well, but I felt so bad leaving knowing that I was gonna get posted

and then he's gonna find out and then I'd be like, yeah, man, I'm gonna do it. So I just tried to nip it in the butt. I just texted him, I said, listen, man, these guys were all saying all this terrible shit and then I joined in the ranger games and I shouldn't have, I'm sorry. Oh, one's response was so great.

He's like, oh, it's cool, man. Yeah, you're my homie, man. You can say whatever you want about me. Yeah, it's if you don't know me, I'll fucking kill you. Like, he's like, oh it's cool man. Yeah, you're my homie man. You can say whatever you want about me. Yeah. It's if you don't know me, I'll fucking kill you. Like he's like, you could make fun of my wife, I wouldn't care. Because I know you.

Yeah, yeah. But if you even just said like the slightest thing wrong about me like, my experience, I don't know you. My experience, Owen, I don't know what got him banned. But my experience with Owen was that he was the sweetest, nicest fucking guy. I like.

He would buy everybody drinks. I don't know. I guess, I, where is he? What happened? We get along. We get along. But where, where is he? Well, he moved, yeah, some kids and moved to where his wife is from.

Yeah, I don't. I think he also got really heavy into this is just my interpretation of Owen, is that he got into like a real intellectual stuff. Like, like he started listening to intellectuals and getting into these more kind of deeper subjects. He got, and he took that so serious that he started a podcast and started tackling these kind of like bigger things, which aren't as light and fluffy as stand up

or playing piano or telling jokes. And I think because of that, that's just my own assessment. Because of that, I think that's kind of affected his career a bit. Okay. If that makes sense. It seems like he got into politics, right? He kind of like a lot of that stuff.

Like I remember one time he's on Twitter, he just kept saying the N word. And he was trying to make the point of like, why do we give this word so much power and all this stuff? He was trying to make a point. But really, all everyone saw was a guy saying the N word on Twitter a bunch over on. It's a tough thing to say.

And it's all really not his message to tell. You know, like, yeah, I've just always, I swear to God, but I've only had, I've only had good encounters with him. He's good guy to me. He is the sweetest, he's always for me. For me, he was always the sweetest human being I'd ever, like, oh, I like him a lot. Oh, I think that that's my assessments.

I think he just, he got into stuff that really isn't what comedy is. You also got to publicly's that's my assessments. I think he just he got into stuff that really isn't what comedy is You also got a publicly beefed as a me. I don't remember like I was following this stuff online in like YouTube politics that Just it seemed like he was on a spiral. Yeah Yeah, and also I don't know what's going on in his and I hope that I didn't word that weird word, like, I want to get mad about that. But I think if you come from the world of, I'm an actor and comedian and I play piano and I make people smile and laugh.

And then you do this hard shift to like, let's really deep dive on trans rights and, you know, stuff like that. That's just, some things right now, you know, because he was probably saying, some stuff that would seem more normal now, you now yeah but it's like at the beginning of Covid or whatever it's like yeah the crazy people now they're like actually that at a point it's also a terrible city to be

Republican and correct and he's conservative yeah yeah yeah you can just say a thing moving having an opinion and he's very much a conservative in a lot of ways and and a lot of subjects. So that also would probably drove him bonkers. Yeah, I don't know. This is not a very tolerant city. Yeah, sure, man, it's down to tough.

But this town is really hypocritical because this town, Hollywood, with a lot of very rich people, they're all conservative, but they just don't say. Right, they have to hide. Yeah, but they're all fucking conservative as shit. I promise you. Well, that's not saying they're Trump supporters. I they just don't say. Right, they have to hide. Yeah, but they're all fucking conservative. It's shit, I promise you. Well, that's not saying they're Trump supporters.

I'm saying they're conservative. Yeah, someone said a really smart thing, I don't remember who it was, but they were like, the problem with this town is that, and this is just LA in general, but maybe everywhere in America, is that like the people on the right think that people on the left are wrong,

and the people on the left think people on the right are evil. That's right. That's okay. One side people on the left think people on the right are evil. That's right. That's okay. One side's just gone. These people a bunch of dumb, dumb, man. They don't know what they're talking about. And then everyone over there's talking,

hold them over there racist and terrible. And you're like, no, yes, just the other opinion. But there is that version of that. Remember when it was like, save the children, they're eating babies with a dreamer crumb. There is that version to the left too, but they're different things that they paint each other with.

The left to the right is, you're all racist, Egypt, which is terrible, but the right has a version of that. We're like, oh yeah, you're all, you know, you're all eat children. Yeah. Well, that's what my sister was, when Tahiti, my sister was talking to somebody

she knew from LA, and they had a friend there who said, yeah, well, who's the racist friend? And my sister said, what? And she goes, who's his racist friend? Whatever I've been. And she goes, what do you mean racist? And she goes, well, I hit the Trump supporter. Right.

And he was being serious. And she was like, hey, fucko. Yeah. Some people are Trump supporters, and this is coming from somebody who's not, but some people are Trump supporters because the other side hasn't worked for them even a little bit.

So there, but what Trump has alternatives that they find way more favorable. Doesn't mean they're racist. It just means that they want anything, but this woke fucking left wing agenda, which has its... And you see more like he was confusing at first when Trump rose to pop him, like what have these people seen him?

Now it makes like a hundred percent more sense. And with everything that we've done, it's like, yeah man, well, you know. Well, I think it all comes down to just likeability. You can do anything you want if you're just likeable. And you can't do anything if you're unlikeable. And so like Donald Trump, no matter like you could find something he did that was reasonable or good and people were like, what?

How dare you defend him because he's just so unlikeable. But he's also likeable. I don't think he's very likeable. But there's another side that thinks he's fucking hilarious. Like I like watching him in debates because the guy cracks me up. Yeah, I just, I think he's a con man. I actually don't think, I think he's so, he's into Trump,

he's got anything else of a Trump. That's always been my problem personally, but he is fucking. He's also a liberal. I don't know why everyone doesn't realize. Yeah, he was a Democrat. He was a supporter of Democratic. He's a voter. Democratic is entire life. He can't deal with Clinton campaign. Yeah, but

but everyone do he goes, uh, he's a Republican. He's also on the public. He's just like, fuck you. I changed my mind. Yeah. I'll be like, uh, but he, he does know the economy. Like a lot of people will say that there's a lot about him. I've heard a lot of business people say they don't like him personally, but his economic policies make more sense than the Democrats economic policies. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all.

I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all.

I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. is like oh that's crazy talk but then it's thinking like actually yes yeah there is something to it at first it just sounds he's won't shut up about China right about that right he was right he was right always think like i don't like trump and everyone goes yay jeffs on our side and i go

don't get carried away i think you guys are a bunch of idiots too yeah i think i'm Republican just because i realize liberals are stupidly annoying and they are don't paint me in either camp yeah and it's like but they think oh he must be on our side because he says bad things about trump is like nah i just i don't paint me in either camp. Yeah, and it's like but they think oh he must be on our side because he says bad things What Trump's like? No, I just I don't like unlikable people. Yeah, I think Trump is a very unlikable guy Although I did have a dream recently that Trump held my hand in a car And in the dream I was like so excited like I can't believe this is happening. I can't wait to tell this story Oh, so I've got a pretty powerful friend here

Like in the dream I was really like I can't believe we're whole. I've had a gay dream. No, I have I've got a pretty powerful friend here. Like, in the dream, I was really like, I can't believe we're whole. Have you ever had a gay dream? No, I have. I've had, oh, this is gross. I've had dreams that I was having sex with my sister, and I wake up mortified. Yeah. Like, I'm like, I was traumatized. I've had that dream probably like three or four times

of my entire life, and every time I'm like, what? So in my dream, in my dream, I've had, I've been having, I talked about this a long time on the podcast, I was having sex with somebody and I was like, with a dude and I remember in the dream to be like, this is the worst shit, I'm just not, I'm very straight.

So it was so to me, it was so bad, but I was like, well, here we go again. And I was like, I feel like, here we go again. And I think I was getting nailed. I really do it. I was like, of course, yeah. That's the scary part. I'm getting nailed.

And I'd be like, not doing the nailing. I'd be like, here we go again. And I have to get on my tummy. I remember it. It's fucked, dude. Well, that's probably the more emotional role. It's like, if you're a straight guy and you're like taking it, that'd be the thing that like

the stuff of a dream or a night. Sure. It's so much emotionally more emotional. Actually, that might be the first time some people go, you're homophobic and then people always go, no, I'm not afraid of homosexuals. I just, I, you know, say like I just don't agree with it or whatever their opinion is.

They go, I'm not afraid, but maybe we are afraid. I'm just not a child. The sex part we're going, oh God, that'd be scary, huh? Yeah. Are you kidding me? Yeah. Like also when I look at you, you're a very good looking guy.

I would never be able to make out with you. No, I'm not a millionaire. You're a weird dude, I can't do it. Oh, not a million years, I've thought about this a bunch. It's just not, I've done plays or I've done like, there are TV shows where you're supposed to make out with the guy and I'm like, I just, it's not the name. It's not the name.

It's not the name. I'm not. You know what I have thought about this a million times? It's because I always joke, I say in my act that I wish I was gay, you know, because I prefer the company of dudes. Like I'd much rather hang out with guys. All my friends, we have such a good time, everything's good. But then I have to like, depart from all my guy friends to go have sex

Yeah, but if I could just be into it that part it would be so much easier my life would be just so much easier I wasn't jealous of that he goes if I had access to women I would never have wanted to leave. Yeah free foods with all my boys. Yeah, get to hang out play dice fucking lift play cards fuck around I mean I was trying to explain that to this girl. I don't want to out her on the podcast by name, but she was like, she thought she was gay. She had a girlfriend for three years. The girlfriend broke up with her, and then the girlfriend was like,

she was so broken up about like the breakup. So sad about it that she went to a wedding, started flirting with this guy, and then her and the guy had sex, and she's like, oh my God, I forgot. What it's like to have sex with a guy, dude, I am straight again. Like I was wrong, I am not,

I might be bisexual, something, but I'm definitely not a lesbian. Like it was the greatest thing, I'm mystic, that this was the best, oh man, it was just something about it. And I go, yeah, you're just talking about exactly what I, you prefer the company of women, because they're nice to you, and they listen, and you guys have a ton in common.

And then, but then you, but you want to have sex with dudes. Yeah. That's the life I'm living. This one you say that because my dad, but I don't want anything to do with them sexually. I have a friend who has a lot of gay women friends. She's, she's friends a lot of gay women. She actually works with a lot of them, some of them are agents and stuff. And to a woman, she told me that like all of them end up like almost all of them.

They're obviously a very gay women who are just in the women. But a lot of them who are in these relationships, fucking end up missing dick and go back to do's. I wonder if there's some sort of like closeted lesbians. So like they're out as lesbians, but they're closetly sneaking around and getting dick. Well yeah, because I think a lot of women... That must be a thing. A lot of women are into, they could be married, but they're also attracted to women.

But don't get it twisted. They like men. That's what I'm saying. They're like in their mind, they're like, I could never let anyone know that I'm sneaking off and having dick, you know, because I hate men and I don't want any of them. That exists. Yeah, and they're like, but I also need it. You know, you know, because I hate men and I don't want any better. That exists. Yeah, and they're like, but I also need it.

You know, it's like a drug or something. No, my friend, my friend's good guy. What would that be called? He's a good looking guy and he, that's, that's happened a lot of times. Like at a restaurant in fact, these two... The restaurant.

Yeah, these two hot... One of them was really hot and they were, they were gay gay straight up gay And she was in a relationship with this out of girl for a long time, but she was fucking just Cross-bid hot. Yeah, just and She started getting drunk and she took my buddy went to the bathroom. She don't see a lot of hot lesbians I know that's a mean take you do I showed up from Seattle. They always look like me. Yeah, well these girls

This girl was like I know they exist muscular, but also hot as shit and she met him at she was at the bathroom And he kind of like came out and she just kind of met him there and fuck them really in the bathroom That's pretty simple. I was at the table. How does this stuff happen? How does this work? Well, yeah, she's one of the best. Kara D Levine. Is she bisexual though or is she? I think she's bisexual too. Yeah, I think so too.

She's super hot. A lot of times I don't buy it. A lot of times I got serious. Oh, for hippo eyes. My legs are a lot. Okay. Well, here's the thing. Also, people might listen and go,

that guy's a dick. He said there's not a lot of high lesbians, but here's the thing, they don't care that I said that. Lesbians don't need me to be, you know, they don't give a shit, they go, oh, so some straight guy, thinks I'm not a... They're also going for a more masculine one. I don't know, she was gay.

Yeah, and here's actually this improvement, my point. The third, look, this third was Kate McKinnon from SNL, that's the third hottest lesbian in the world But female sexuality is more fluid What does fluid mean? It can change unlike guys. Oh, yeah, yeah seemingly it's a scientific consensus that you can go back and forth Or that start a hot lesbian. I don't know good night. She's from this is not to who I consider to be. They're not saying the hottest. I'm just like, uh, I'm just famous. Yeah, my bad. She's the back. They're ranking in

fame. I love. Jamel. She's that black rose from his East. I'm very. It's good. Has one of the sites told a joke in the last 20 years? I don't know. Every time I see her on someone like, Oh, this is going to be funny. Wanted to psychs. And then she gets on and just bitches and mones.

Really? Yeah. You're like, you know what, it's like to be a black woman in America. You're a millionaire. Wanda, who's this? We think you're hilarious. Amanda La.

Amanda La. She's like a younger. I got skeptical, skeptical hippo eyes on this one too. What does hippo eyes mean? Like, I like this looks I don't quite buy it. Oh You love animals don't you? Yeah, I don't know dude big animal. She's really good looking hippo eyes, and she's gay is your skepticism because she's good looking Yeah It's got that straight look. I mean, let me just see something

What's that one there's a neck just who claims she's a trans and I find it hard to believe. Trans? She says she's trans and her Wikipedia, but I don't I don't believe her. I know that's a weird thing to question. No, why are you questioning Elliott Page right now? Who? Elliott Page? I don't know who that is. No, there's a girl. She's a comedic actress. She's very funny, but in her Wikipedia, she said she's on, I think you should leave With Tim Robinson, but I don't know what her name is. She's very very famous and very funny. I think you should leave or should leave With Tim Robinson and she's one she's the main female actress on season one and two So she'll be in the cast I guess if you do that. I'll do that

Not that girl cast. There it is. Yep, Patty Harrison. She says she's trans, but she doesn't. But she's a girl. She was a guy. And she claims she's, I don't know what that means. I think she said she was a biological male

who's now a female, but she also is the type of person to say all sorts of stuff, you know? Yeah. I think she said she was a biological male who's now a female, but she also is the type of person to Say all sorts of stuff, you know, yeah Because she's she's funny like that. She's like a troll. She's on her I'll go back. I'll go back up. I'll go back up. Where? Well, I guess it would be personal life and so I'm getting his mother-merr-father father Okay, but you're the personal life part. Transgender woman.

Shortly after dropping out of Ohio, what a weird thing, huh? Delete's in diagnosis. She's hilarious. I mean, like literally one of the funniest people, like she kills it on the show. And everything I've seen around, she's hilarious. And then also she, I'm just vouching for her. This has nothing to deal with her being trans

but then the She did a thing where she changed her Twitter picture to nabisco and then changed her Twitter name to nabisco And since she's verified as patty hair So it had like a little check mark so people thought it was actually nabisco and she started to eat all these things that like nabisco would tweet Like hey, you know we're in this many grocery stores as there's stuff then she goes also we're excited to announce this musician Cia is going to be taking over our Twitter tomorrow and the next day she pretended she was Cia tweeting from the Nabisco website and then Cia would go hey I'm so excited there are only two genders and all these people start again super pissed off at Nabisco and

She sounds great. Yes, she's hilarious. I love people like this Yeah, and so she got banned from Twitter This is probably is never okay. Thank you for holding us accountable. We are better than this We started learning grows a brand and you make that possible. I'm gonna swing from the channel here from I'm gonna Swim in the channel here from the chandelier as this is see a trans women are men all cats like it's just such a funny Way to my troll the world and also getting a biscoe in trouble got see it in trouble like she did all this great So she's a hilarious hilarious woman Hello, I'm see it the singer. We do not want your business

Yeah, if you are bisexual, we do not want your business. Nila Wafers by Nabil's. Oh man, she's great. Fuck, I gotta watch. I think you should leave. She makes me laugh so hard, yeah. But also Tim Robbins is brilliant.

Yeah, I like was like a fanboy. We happened to be in Detroit at the same time when I was shooting a movie and he was shooting, like either, he was shooting a new show. He's English, right? He's Detroit, he's from Detroit, born and raised, yeah. Oh shit.

He's brilliant. But anyways, I found him. I was like, I'm finding this guy. Well, my buddy's like, I'm working on the show of his. I was like, perfect. Set me up, I wanna hang out with him. So I got the hang out with him at a tiger's game for like three minutes.

What was worth it? You gotta find your heroes. Who's your team baseball? Mariners, Seattle Mariners. You're not a baseball guy, huh? I was just at the Dodger game. It's great with Padres. I wanted shot become to the Orioles guy. I threw it at first pitch for the Orioles. See, I was serum on it first pitches. I threw one out for the Baltimore Orioles and he was in Baltimore like the stage before. Oh, yeah, these are, uh,

is there a music here? Yeah. Okay, I can't do that, but we can watch. And these are all the, you played baseball. All the ones I've thrown so far that one I launched into the sweets Why did you throw it in the 200 level? I thought it'd be funny and then the the GM of the Mariners Kevin Martinez goes That was our worst first pitch we've ever had and I was like I think you mean best first pitch because it was on Twitter And he goes save the stick for Bill Murray and I was like, all right. So he was like mad about it. So after that, I threw only just good first pitchers after that. No more gags.

Love the mascot. You love it. I love it. Oh yeah, it's funny. Who looked like a baseball player? First time I ever, I was like to throw to the mascot. It's my favorite. There's the Baltimore one coming up.

How many pitches have you thrown? Wow, so many. I think 13 or? How do you do it? You just call them up? No, it's actually quite a process. I basically hunt them down the way I hunt down Tim Robinson. I go, who's got a contact?

And then I use that contact to meet whoever, and finally figure out who the person is, who organizes it all. And then you gotta make yourself sound way more successful than you are, you know? Just shout a movie. Stuff like that. I wh? Just shout a movie. Stuff like that.

I whore out all my credits. Yep. I go, all you want to believe what I'm doing now. Yep. I'm the host of the Fighter and the Kid. I just show them this one episode. The Fighter and the Kid. And then they see how many followers of the Fighter and the Kid

as they go, this guy is a really big deal. I'm the way back today from the airport, the guy, the customs guy, is going, Brian Calon. Dude, I took a week off because I knew you were fucking into eating. He was like, that's guy goes, Brian Calon, dude, I took a week off, cause I knew you were fucking into eating. I was like, that's very nice, you sir. That's nice.

I know. We didn't have a podcast, so that's good. You, how often do you recognize? I don't know. It depends. Yeah? I mean, I never get recognized in LA, but everywhere else people come up to me and say,

it's like the only town. It's always like, when I, like, I think this is the town where if they recognize you, they just don't say nothing. Yeah, well, like in Borabor I got, like you don't know until they go, have a fan after they have to say. Do you like it when people come up?

Yeah, me too, I love it. Yeah, I'm never, I love being wrecked. They go, I don't want to bother them. I like it when my kids say, I'm lonely. Yeah, my kids get excited because the, you know, the customs guy with his gun is like,

oh shit, you know that. Yeah. That's fun for me. But like guys will be like, oh man, you're in St. Louis. Let me know if you want to get a beer. I reply right away, I go, yeah. They go, really? I go, yeah, come pick me up. I don't know anybody in St. Louis.

My girl said somebody hit me up on it. I'm fine at all. My girl sent me a thing. I forgot to answer back. It sent me a DM and he was in Bora, Bore. He's like, let me buy you a drink, but he was at a different hotel. Everything's on the water.

So I think I'll boat over there. Oh, I make him come get me and everything. And they can't believe it's happening. They act like I'm some superstars. I'm like, this is crazy. I go, yeah, it's fine. Let's just get some, I need someone to talk to. Yeah.

Fuck yeah, I'm the same way. Sitting in a Tampa hotel. I don't think I'm better than you. Yeah, yeah. I really don't. Well, that's why I like all those comics that work with me and hood. I don't think I'm better than you. Yeah, yeah. I really don't. Well, that's why all those comics that work with me and stuff, I don't know, shop, I guess he stays there being B and orders food and he's got,

he's a family guy. But shop's not trying to go to bars and meet girls. Whereas I'm always trying to do, I make the comics that come with me, hang out with me the whole time. They come back, they're like, yeah, Jeff wants to do stuff all the, my buddy Zacco stayed with me from Chicago

Very funny comedian look up Zacco great guy, but he stayed at my place for like three or four days Maybe like I got a rest man like he was like pleading with me. He's like I got to go home I was like no way we're going to the chimney sweep. He's like dude. It's midnight I've been we hung out all day at the pool. I'm stoned out of my mind. I was like, no, we're going to the chimney sweep. And then at midnight, yeah, that's the echo. Big hands, we had a six, six, something like that. Big tall, cool guy. But anyways, so he goes to bed in the guest room or whatever.

And I just call my buddy Jeff Z and I go, all right, we're going to the chimney sweep. He's like, oh, dude, it's like my social motor is insane. How do you, so, so do you get stoned a lot? No, I never get stoned, I don't smoke weed. But you drink. I drink, yeah he goes down. You can drink all day, no problem.

No problem. And then you can get him to do standup. Yeah, that's good. And drink. You don't drink? No, I can't drink during the day, I'm fucked. Oh, yeah, that's fun. And I can drink less and less.

But I just thought it was funny, the Zaco, like there's cool young guys, younger than me, and he's going, please just let me go to sleep. Just pleading with me, like this is, come on buddy. I can't do it. Come on buddy, it's been a whole day. That is kind of what you're doing too much. You stand up lifestyles.

Yeah, I just, when you're younger. You know, I just like talking to people. I've learned everything I like has to do with talking. If there's talking involved, I'm in. My buddy, we're at the dog beach and he goes, he goes, we should rent ATVs because we saw some tourists go by on ATVs. And I remember in my mind, I didn't say that a lot of go,

oh, wait, we couldn't talk. I thought, like, who would I talk to if I was on that ATV with the helmet on? So you're not in like things like fishing or... Fishing, we can talk. Yeah. But like, darts, let's go throw some darts. You say, yeah, we can, that's a fun game we can talk. But but like darts you see it. Let's go throw some darts I say yeah, we can that's a fun game. We can talk but like snowboarding no dude I'm on the mountain by myself with headphones reading no way reading. What are we doing? I don't like it like like you don't like

Solitary kind of like being alone You'll talk to people next to you in a plane my ex-crivener's like I'm flying to Chicago I wish you were on my flight because that too was going to Chicago or supposed to and I almost canceled my flight just so I could fly on the same flight as her so I'd have somewhere to talk to So you like talking to somebody on the plane. Yeah, I don't talk to me. Well, I don't talk to strangers on the plane No, not generally because I'm stuck with them. Yeah, yeah, that's a little different. That is that's right That seems inconsistent because you're happy to tell it's cool and you're on a plane You run a night three comedians at you know, that's the best

I guess there was a run there where I saw Ian bag every Sunday. How's he doing? He's good. Yeah He's the best one of my favorite people comedy road dog. Yeah, he's really well before the pandemic he had like a Residency in Vegas, so I'd see him there all the time and then we'd always be on the same flight on Sunday coming home And so I was like it was getting a lot of Ian bag time just because on accident. He's a good guy American Airlines always had better seat than me. He did he'd like that to be known He's set in front of me. Yeah, the rich gay richer Piece of shit. He's a good guy, man. I love him. What who's in first place baseball wise? The Dodgers are killing it, Yankees are killing it. Yeah, Mariners are doing good,

but we picked a bad year to get hot because every other team is way hot. Fernando Tottis Jr. just got popped for steroids. That's some baseball news. Really? He's gonna suspended the whole year. How many people are doing steroids, do you think? Nobody does steroids no more.

That's why it's such a big deal that you got popped yeah Because their bodies don't look as muscular well, it's just like how you gonna get caught in 2022 doing steroids like it was different when it was you know Well, he yeah, what do you do them now for? Can I say I Always gonna be ahead What do you mean the tech just chemistry and underground you know, labs are always going to be one step ahead as far as the techniques to evasion is always gonna be one step ahead of detection. So much harder to do, but I think if you have the money,

you have the resources, you have the willingness to do it, there's a compound out there right now that's undetectable. Mm. You know, people are always getting caught retroactively, like the Metri-Clock-Off in the Olympic lifting, you know, 10 years always getting caught retroactively, like the Metri Klockov in the Olympic lifting, you know, 10 years later, it's like, you're juicing. I like to, I like, I always love hearing the athletes

try to wiggle out of it. That's always my favorite. They get popped, it gives public, and then the athletes are always like, oh, I accidentally mixed up my sports drink. Oh, the other day I was at the park and I fell into some steroids. Like, they always have a terrible story.

Jan D'Azerrein said he was on, I don't know what it was on, he was saying. People have no fucking idea how many actors and athletes, how everybody is juicing. I might be doing, you and I might be the only guys not doing it. Boy, the cops juice, every cop juice, I want them on steroids.

I want them bigger and stronger and faster. I heard a ton of the fire department is on steroids. Also, it's okay to be on steroids if you're not in pro baseball or pro, like that's the only reason it's bad is because they've made a rule about it in a sport. It's not against a lot for Mark Harley to do steroids. Look at him.

It sure isn't. Yeah. What do you got? Let's see what we got here. All right. Karina fans. It's Karina fans. Do you want to start off with something that's kind of like?

Yeah. Crazy. It's kind of feel bad watching it. kinda like crazy? It's kinda feel bad watching it. Not at all. I don't feel bad watching anything. Not this one. I watch 9-11 on loop at my house. So we can't play this on air, but you watch the, what? This was crazy.

Yeah, so. Dude, I love this clip so much. This is a smoke shop. This is a 22 year old owner, and these two guys come in with masks. This guy's done this before. Why are they trying to steal V8? Watch how caught. Check out the money.

Oh, I love the Jeff hasn't seen this. I haven't seen it. I don't like this. It's a terrible mask. Cut. Where do you guys work in Monster Club? Say what? Say what?

Yes, please. Yeah. it. Jacob, he said his name. I don't know if you could just fucking it. Oh, that's a knife. Oh, my God boy. that's what you get. He lived though, right? I hope. I didn't get the actual.

That's a big blade. He goes up and there's just kind of drops him here. And walks calmly. No, guys, he's been doing it a long time. No guns or nothing. That kid's done it before. That's stupid teenager, who just got his fucking life cut up. So wait, so can we figure out what happened to that kid?

Yeah, what I was gonna say. I love life stuff. I looked at the next few days. He was still alive. I hope he's still. I hope he's alive. From what I read, they didn't get the details from those two kids, like it's nowhere,

but if Mark had find it. I hope he lived, because that kid was just. I know, because he's just a stupid kid that tried to, I don't think he was a guy. He didn't have a weapon. But jump in over. That's about some 16 year old kid. Did he live?

Okay, but also let's take some responsibility. You wore a mask into a store. So stupid. Knowing like we're gonna let's just go in there and jack this place. I mean, there's, that kid was being amazed, I think. You know, fuck around with being amazed or asian they are korean whatever the fuck he

was he he they thought uh this guy's asian he's a pussy good luck he don't know they got that what he's talking about is he is Vietnamese that was both ends of the spectrum on crazy you said it's Vietnamese don't fuck you up you don't fuck with the the Vietnamese or k Koreans or the Japanese or whatever he was Which now is already going to wait a minute and then you go He probably thought he's Asian he's a pussy. I did crazy steam. I guarantee that like like people they profile They go I got looks like he's fucking a nerd or something. Yeah, right good luck. Wait the guy that stabbed him was a Vietnamese Yeah, really he was

The guy that stabbed him was a Vietnamese. Yeah, really? He was. He was. He looks like he's mixed, but he was told it's all because of the footage. Yeah, it's kind of. Well, also how bad of a robbery if you go, hey, Jacob, come back here.

Not so many of you there. He's just a double-tanic. They're just, and they were just dumb. Even the way that they were like, they were so nervous you could tell. Because he was like, why are you guys wearing masks like that? And they're like,, it's like what? That's wild wait, so you guys feel bad for the kid that got stabbed yeah, I do because I think he was just a stupid

I didn't think he's gonna get stabbed no And he got in there without a weapon. He was like let's run the store It's one of those dumb things you do when you're 16 Yeah, and then you get stabbed like that and it can fuck you up for the you Yeah, and then and then your mother's like, oh my god, you know, it's yeah Well, I don't mind guys who have guns who come in and try to kill somebody and they get fucking shot in the face I got no problem with that. It's a 16 year old kid who's not thinking his brain is simply developed And he's like I'm gonna do something crazy and then he gets stabbed 15 times. Yeah, that was a big blade, too

Just see the size of that blade. Man. That was no joke. And he just stabbed them all over the joint. Dude, everywhere the legs. Yeah, the legs. Arms, the back like he just, he hit them here on the first one I was going, ooh, that's a bad spot.

Yeah, that size of a blade in. Oh, sorry. Alright, so I don't know, I don't know who's side of mine. It all seemed pretty. No, you didn't do that. Which is all super exciting. The shopkeeper is in his right because that guy came over. Hey, jump. And then you don't know what's

going to happen. So you're allowed to defend yourself, which he did. I was hoping Jacob would get stabbed though, not the other kid. He stabbed right in there too. One little step over here, he would have been dead, but he got him there. He was a bomb dead. Somebody was arguing with me, actually, I think it was Jay actually on the road, Jay shop, we're saying, no, he's going to be prosecuted, just sort of guessing, looking at the scenario

and going, you can't, you can defend yourself, you can't do this, right? There's different things. Oh, yeah. You knew what's, now in a state like Nevada, I assume it's not going to be, you know, super uptight about a shop owner, a shop owner, stabbing a criminal, but it's an interesting little legal. It's like defying, defending yourself. Sure. First of all, the guy jumped over the counter.

When you jump over the counter with a mask, you, your lawyer is gonna be like, dude, he didn't know what the fuck to expect. People get shot all the time. It's my perspective. Well, he did was go, because he says, you guys, please leave. And when he said that, the guy jumped over

and he went, I'm not fucking waiting for this guy to draw me. Boom, boom, boom, boom. That jury, I don't even think a DA takes that case. I mean, the DA goes to fuck that. First, what if he's running away and you go and stand? Sure, that's what he did turn his back, but even then it happens so quickly, you're just like, get away from me.

Here's a question. So let's say those jump over the thing, they steal like cartridges or whatever the heck they were trying to steal or money. And then they leave, he goes, calls the cops, the cops come, they give them the footage to the cops. What happens? This kid's probably just get away with it, right?

This is not like the cops go, okay, here's a voucher for all the stolen goods. Right, there's not like an insurance company's gonna give you, right, like, that's a really annoying thing. Is people think it's okay to do bad things to businesses because they go, well, they go to insurance. It's like, well, at this age, I know a lot of business owners now,

and it's not really that easy. No. It's not just like, oh yeah, insurance covers everything. Go ahead and put spray paint all over it because who cares? It's just a business. Well, that was the thing with BLM. When they were tearing up businesses,

had nothing to do with BLM, they were just destroying entire businesses. Right. All up and down Melrose. And those are people. Fuck that. People who work there as a... Right, it's very tough to do that. Yeah.

But what I was going to say is, so maybe that's another reason. This guy's going, this is my fucking shop and these teenagers are about to jack me and I'm supposed to just put my hands up and then... People die that way all the time. When you're a store owner like that, you're very aware that people die, get shot, and stab and kill all the time that way. We might also be naive like me thinking like, well it's just a knife.

Like I'm not gonna go to, if I had a gun and I shoot a teenager, I might get, you know, trouble, but it's just a knife. Who knew we'd do so good with that knife? Yeah. You know what I'm saying? That was a nice, for you.

That's a small knife actually. It's about, it's like, it's like a six inch knife. It's like under. Let's take a look again. I think the gigantic bro. I don't like watching it. I mean, just to see the knife. I wanted to watch it. Look at that. Look how long it is. Right. It's I think it's there. That's a big blade. And I don't know if you could hear this Jeff, but the guy goes, I'm dead. I'm dead. Yeah. I don't know how he said. He didn't die, but this dude knows what'm dead as he collapses. Look at how he's having fun. Now he didn't die, but. This dude knows what the fuck he's doing. This is just not relenting.

That's the spot shot right there. I was gonna say earlier, you gotta treat this like if you're a kid, we should teach kids to go, this thing you're about to do, what's the worst case scenario? Right. You're envisioning robbing this piece of work. These videos are good. Right. What's the worst possible?

Have you just considered an option that this guy could kill you right people need to think about that when they road rage when they do any of these things like man if you unleash the the dragon and certain people like this he's thinking oh man we'll just when worst case we'll get a rest we'll get a slap on the wrist for stealing if we get coffers robbing the place no you can get a wheelchair my guy like you you, your life is significantly different because you wanted to... I don't know what happened these guys,

they said they say nothing. I think they did. No, as far as I saw, I guess maybe because they're young, they don't want to give updates on the things. Oh, yeah, that's probably right. You take it to the hospital, you know? And if you just like, Do we know the other day young?

Yeah. 17? Oh yeah. There was a few guys arrested and one guy was gonna be arrested at the hospital. Well I saw a kid just on Facebook the other day, the hit him in his buddies like for fun, these should just throw shit off the bridge. Just for fun. I used to do that all the time, but we did like water balloons and stuff.

These guys were throwing couches and they were throwing like rocks. They threw a muffler, they threw like all this different stuff. And a rock went through the windshield and killed a guy. Like immediately because the car was driving so fast, and the rock was so big that it just hit the guy's head. Killed him immediately. And those kids, one of the kids going to jail second degree in murder for like 30 years.

And they're just punk kids who were throwing shit on bridges. Also though, they're shitheads. Also, I'm not, I'm not supporting you. But I've seen in the same way. They didn't think about the consequences. Yeah, exactly. They're sitting there going, oh, we killed a guy. Yeah, and then it's human consequences where it's like,

hey, it doesn't, that just like things get up and you think about. Yeah, a man died. A guy who's like, he's got about to be, you know, he's about to, I think he just was engaged. He did like a regular life. He also didn't do anything wrong. He's just riding in a passenger seat of his friend's car.

Like, just now, every time he go into a bridge, I think, oh man, maybe it's gonna be a regular life. He also didn't do anything wrong. He's just riding in a passenger seat of his friend's car. Just now, every time he go into a bridge, I think. Oh, man, maybe it's kind of real. Did you ever say the thing to you, my dad, always used to say this, do whatever punch, sell it, whatever sucker punch somebody, because you can kill somebody with one hit and you would reference like,

you know, your car, I don't know if that's doing it, it's going to be a good thing to do it. But you can kill somebody with one hit. Because if you knock him out and they fall in concrete. My dad, my dad, hit a dude, and his head, it was at a bus stop with my mother. He punched the dude.

Yeah. And the dude and my dad, when he was in his 20s, was 64, to 35, to 24, just giant Irish guy. Boom, hits him in the face and he said the guy fell back and hit his head so hard in the pavement. That probably happened a lot. That my dad, he combed the obituary. I thought he was going to jail.

Right. He looked at the obituary study was going to jelly right he looked at the obitaries for Two weeks after that. Yeah, yeah, I'm fucked and dead guy It's the guy the guy with a speed on company. I might have done that one That's scary stuff man. Well, you know, and I've really learned something here today You know, but I don't know what I how I feel about don't know what shop owners Defending their businesses. Wow because you guys were really a that I don't know how I feel about shop owners defending their businesses. Because you guys were really, you guys had some opinions about that.

The major response to when you look at the comments, everybody's like, yeah, fuck that kid. It's sort of a visceral response, especially with everything he's going on now, where you go, people are being robbed and getting away. We said like, you like this, this guy's a, you know, like, I get it. I'm not for a manizing the guy who stabbed him.

I'm not for this thing, that guy. I'm a fan of anybody who protects themselves. I'm just saying, I think in that case, that was some stupid fucking kid with his whole life ahead of him and he just tried to do something daring and brazen. Or if he was like tough like you guys, like you have C stuff, and if he'd have just knocked him out, right, just like punched him in the fucking side of the head

and like put his knee on, like we we be rooting for him, wouldn't we? Yeah. We said good friend. We said good friend. We had a knife himself, though. But the knife makes it a real big, like, oh boy. I got a place for a key. Cause stories are just thinking about worst case scenarios too.

The, the, the story owner did say that he thought that the guy could have a gun. Sure. But he thought also like probably didn't, but he, he has to imagine that he did have a gun. Yeah. The story owner shouldn't say shit without a lawyer right now. I mean, yeah, but he has to imagine that he did have a cup. Yeah. The store owner shouldn't say shit without a lawyer right now.

I mean, yeah, so he was talking to the new stations. My order. I don't know. He's doing a whole victory lap going, do you guys see me? It's just so violent. It's just, ah, it's so crazy to watch. And Hase.

And Hase. This was crazy. It's been like going on a, this crazy spiral downward spiral, right? For a while with alcohol, drugs. So she, she did die, but then I'll show you some of the footage of her driving through before she crashes to the house. This footage of this? Yeah.

Oh, Lee, Molly. This is fired to her team. So that's her dodging, like literally almost hit this guy in alleyway. You see how fast she's going? Yeah, it's real quick. And there's one where she's speeding and a ring camera catches it. She's what?

You'll see right here, this is a ring camera. Yep. And this is down to regular street. That's like flying on the street. And then I think you could hear it. There it goes, yeah. Into the house. That's wild.

And that's the house. That's wild. And that's the house. That she drove through. Yep. And it was just some random person's house. Yeah. Car cop fire. And then she was in the car for like a long time, right? These poor people in that house.

I know. I think everyone in the house is fine. Oh, they're okay. I know. Just lost some stuff. Yeah. The whole house, pretty much. What is the deal?

What's the lady saying? What happened to her man? Was she just, she just went through tons of drugs? I've heard there was some sort of a breakup and then she was on cocaine and she just wasn't in a good place, so who knows? But she's been going down this downer spiral

for a while now. I think she tried to kill herself, right? Yeah, that's what it looks like. It looks like that. Why would you do it that way? I don't know. Usually women are very like a particular about their suicides. Right.

Yeah, according to Malcolm Gladwell. I read that in the background. What is it? You just talk about like, you're not blowing your brains out. Well, like, I'm trying to think what book it was is a... I don't remember what the book, which book it was. He's got so many books. It's his book called Self-Harm.

Yeah, it's a book called, when Jeff wants to talk about ladies killing themselves. Well anyways, he's basically, the idea is like this, the San Francisco, the Golden Gate Bridge, right? All these people are jumping off of it. That's something that one guy was like, hey, what we should do is like put a net there that will catch him or put some sort of fence

that they can't jump off the thing. And it kept getting voted, no, because everyone's like, well, they'll just find a different way to kill themselves. We're not saving anybody. We're just, they'll't jump off the thing. And it kept getting voted, no, because everyone's like, well, they'll just find a different way to kill themselves. We're not saving anybody. We're just, they'll just find a different way. But it turns out that if you take away someone's way to kill themselves, that makes them go,

well, that's the way I was gonna do it. I just won't do it now. Because they're very particular. Yeah, it's like, especially women are very romantic about how they kill themselves. They don't wanna leave a mess usually, so like they usually won't blow their brains out. Where men don't care.

They'll just blow their brains out. Women will think, well, who's going to find my body? Who's going to see this? God, sure. So it's very intimate about how they will kill themselves. So that's why women tend to not kill themselves. That's heartbreaking. This is pretty reckless.

I don't know if I would call that a suicide. My buddy, she was on the roll kinds of drugs and vodka. My buddy was a cop and he would investigate cold cases. He was an international, an international waters weird. And there was a woman, same thing, she went on a cruise. And she wrote all these poems and she fucking waited herself down. In the middle of the night, she waited until she was in the deepest part of the ocean. She done all the research.

And she waited herself down with a backpack. And she tied, she had to chain down her body so she couldn't get it off. And she just jumped into the water, man, at the deepest part of the ocean and left a note and just disappeared. And that's interesting, man, because you just wanted to kind of just disappear and that makes me fucking sad. Yeah, sucks. It makes me sad, dude.

It's also like, you know what I'm saying? Same with the bridge, because they, you know, that documentary that people jump off the bridge and they'd have footage of it, that people who survived were like, the moment I jumped off, I regretted it. Yeah, you know what I'm probably saying with that?

What you guys up is when you have kids, because when you have kids, everything becomes unbearably sad when you think, so I think about Anne Hayes, I think about people jumping off the bridge. When you have kids, you know that it sounds fucked up, but like you know that somebody's child, and you know that somebody's mother,

you know that, and man dude, it's like when you, it's unfathomable in a way. Why don't I just make kids, no I know you know, I know you know, but it's not a bigable in a way. Why don't you just make sure that you're still a man? I know you know, but I'm a huge responsibility. I'm just a big pussy. I'm a way bigger pussy now that I have children.

Yeah, but also I'm just at an age where I cry. You can see things. Like I think maybe you just, you might be blaming your kids for just becoming a good guy. But you're just a nice guy. Yeah, I am. The things you thought were cool when you were 19 or when you were 16 or 12,

isn't what you think is cool now. Now you value humans and life. I was always that way. I was always somebody who cared about people's feelings way too much. And that fucked me up a lot. Like I would always bring like Rogan Roy would always say, especially women and stuff, because you bring broken and crazy into your life all the time dude and it's gonna bite you in the ass

Yeah, and it did and and I was broken and crazy You know looking back on it you have to take responsibility for how broken and crazy you were because it you would you would bring that in because it was a Way of staying broken and crazy maybe I don't know yeah, But, you know, I would always try to fix people. Yeah. Well, see, I'm a little disensitized to things that aren't in my circle of life, right? So it's like, I always say this, like, you can't care about everything.

Right? So, like, for example, like, all these people die every day. Why aren't you sad about that? Why aren't you sad? It's not sad. That's 10 people just die in Vietnam right now, like you. I know, no, no, no. You didn't know sad about that? Why aren't you sad that 10 people just died in Vietnam right now? Like you didn't know them, right? So I kind of do the same thing with these

and people go, Jeff, you're being insensitive. I go, I don't know and hate. Yeah. I'm sorry that it didn't affect me. Because I don't know. She's as much of a person I don't know as those 10 people that I just referenced just died. It's true. I just don't know.

We should get into that. I'm not happy about it. But also I'm able to make light of it and not really make it ruin my day because I don't know them. If I found out you even had like, I mean, the first time I ever met you, I was like, hey man, I think it's,

like I love you. And like, so now it affects me. Yeah. It's outside my sphere. Yeah, we're not care about everything. Evolve affects me. Yeah, it's like but if it's outside my sphere, we don't care about everything. Evolved for that. Yeah. Well, in Hays, I think like she'd had her life,

I think her dad molested her and then both her parents died of AIDS. How about that? Is that true? Yeah, look that shit up. She had a fight. I did a good. I was at a broad school party on Sunday and I had to, I was at a pool party on Sunday and I had to actually Google who Anne Haysh was

because everyone there was actors and stuff. And I was like, can you guys hear about Anne Haysh? I had a Google Anne Haysh. I never heard of her. Look at that. What is the salt to hands of her father, man? By phobia? Antigame mom who denied, oh yeah, that's a redude.

Multiple levels of mess you up as a kid going on. And those are the type people that commit suicide, right? Oh, that dude. Everyone. Severe childhood trauma. Oh, sure. Her father, self-sufferable, when she was a child and the family experience homelessness.

Her father died of AIDS. How'd you know that? In 1983. I thought this was a thing you made up or something. Look at that, and her brother was killed in a car crash She's been through some shit dude. Yeah, come on Think about that her father died of AIDS One month exactly after I was born

I was born February 4th 1983 and she was hold That was born February 4th, 1983. And she was hold? I don't know. Ha ha ha. Well I'm of 39, so she would have been 20 or something. She's like, she was like, well she'd been 12 or 13, I'm guessing. Why do I look so fucking young, you guys?

Yeah, you look good, buddy. I'm all right. It must be tough just aging as a lady in Hollywood, too. But tough, yeah. Oh, fuck, dude, dude, you kidding me? To be her might not have been as exciting as it was while back. Yeah, I would say that's exactly another.

So that's another father does that to you. You're done. 100% right, yeah. Because your identity is, my identity and existence is rejected by my father or my parent. Oh, her childhood until she was 12. Okay, good luck, good luck with that. It. Oh, her childhood until she was 12. Okay, good luck, good luck with that.

It says she was molested until she was 12. So, what she was a kid. She was a little kid. Brother died in a car crash. Dad died of a days, which is probably a blessing would also fall. And then now, in modern times, in 2022, she dies in a house fire.

In a car crash too. Weird house fire. Weird house. What a fucking mess. Well, I had that to it. There was a dude that had to pull the plug on her. She was like essentially bringing it in the hospital. They, I think they donated her organs. All right. They were looking at her for good.

We're, that's an interesting thing. This is not fucking up lifting shower, buddy. Yeah, people like this, you know. It's a magic thing going on. It's a shame they donate organs that are from, well, here's a weird thing about donators. Organ donors. Like, I remember being like, I'm gonna, yeah,

you can have, I don't care. Do anything with my body. I'm dead, dude. I mean, I don't even, I don't need to be in a cemetery and in this stuff, it's such a waste. But I didn't realize that they're not gonna take my heart and go give it to some kid that just got blasted

by a school bus who needs a heart. They basically donate them to like science. Like college kids do like work on it. Oh really? Yeah, I wouldn't want that. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like you're not being as noble as a donor, organ donor as you might think you'd be.

I thought I was, that's what I was doing. Hold on. It's my driver's license. It's as organ donor like this. That's annoying. Here's a quick one. So we're doing a fight companion this Saturday, at 9 a.m.

And then she was the co-main event. She was very pretty girl. She was the fire for the UFC. So she pulled out, but there's no real reason why she pulled out. She just wrote this message. Interesting. I did not pull from my fight. I was pulled and pissed, heartbroken.

I worked. She spelled, worked wrong. I know. She's pissed off right now. My F and S off to be pulled she'll screen shot at her notes And then she also you know you can just tweet All right Let me show her your her Instagram. Oh quick

What's his with that what's TJ talking? All right, it just pops up sometimes, but this is her Instagram She has her own little thing called pagedfansant.com, which is her version of OnlyFans. She's hot for a fighter. Yeah. But there's a go. There you go. What is that pose?

That's her boyfriend who's also a fighter. A husband or a stud fighter. I don't know, but what are these photos? It's to promote her website. Can you leave her people to butter? Let me just tell you listeners If I get married or have a girlfriend, we're not posting shit like that Whatever

What if you made like I think she made a few hundred thousand a month. She's already making money I think she makes all the money. Yeah, she's well, I probably like a multimillion her money She didn't have to pose that to make money. She's making more money though She made she makes all the money. Yeah, I probably like a multimillionaire money. She didn't have to pose that to make money. She's making more money though. She made money off that post right there. You wouldn't do that? No. What about the reverse?

What if you were bent over like that? She's going your hair. This is insane, that this is even a normal thing. You're coming off like a real Christian conservative right now. Why? Like this is just discussed like what about it is wrong to you? Well, it's just it's unnecessary. It's distasteful. So it brings people to that website and then they have to subscribe. This is kind of like enticing them, you know, tempting them. But is it not like social media is unnecessary? Oh,

yeah, you guys are necessarily not the right word. I find it. It strikes a grip to it is. It's very good to it is. It's pretty hardcore considering it's Instagram. It makes you uncomfortable. Well, and I guess, let me think, let me chew on it a little more. Here's the thing, if it's a porn star, I go, yeah, of course that's what they're doing. But this is a girl we're supposed to respect as a fighter, and a man we're supposed to respect as a fighter, he's like, here's a photo of me and my wife, Doggie Stugge.

It just seems like they're not, I think something should be for you guys, not for us. But that is a taste thing, you know. But here's what I thought. That would be a generation. Here's what I thought was, if it was my wife, or if it was my girl, I made it about me.

Yeah. I think when you do that, you are putting yourself in a certain category. Let's break that one. What do you think when you see that? I get hard. Well, I just think of myself like how embarrassing that you're posting that on the internet.

With you in the sense that like, I'm part of my brain goes, there's nothing wrong with that mark at all. People can do whatever they want. People can't do whatever they want. You would never do that. Yeah, actually this is. Because again, I do like, I have this feeling of of like like when people want to do like kissing like photos

I'm like right kissing the back. I think here's why I like it. Yeah, I just thought about it So okay like I'll be loud with my guys in the bar and we'll have a good time We're hooting and hollering with saying stuff or joking around. It's great. We have fun Right, there's a difference between that in a bar then those dumb pedal cart things You'll see where everyone's drinking and they're peddling and they're going down. You're like, why did you need to be observed? That's a great job.

Just go have fun in the ball. I think we're talking about. I don't, I love those two. I'm sure they're great people. And I hope they're great sex. I hope they're awesome fighters. I don't need to see them butt-humping on Instagram. Maybe, maybe, why did they need to make me view that? Maybe what you're objecting to is that it's a little bit vulgar.

I'm suggesting what I mean by that is that there's no- It makes no- They have seen fucking fraudulent. Yeah, well. They need me to view it. They're monetizing their monetizing, I guess. Yeah. I guess that's what I'm judging.

They're monetizing their, there's a pornographic aspect. It makes me not really respect the thing, you know? Very hot though, I'll tell you, they are good looking people. I thought about this, I like women being sexy and pictures and stuff like that. And I'll post shirtless pics, but I always try to have like a funny capture or something. It's hard for me to take myself seriously

and be sexy right now, context. Yeah. And then put that online. Yeah. Let's do a photo, shit. It's whatever for me to take myself seriously in a like, I'm being sexy right now, context. And then put that online. Let's do a photo shoot. It's whatever the joke can you and put my finger in your mouth? Is it like, why don't you just do that? I couldn't make a joke.

I couldn't help but make a joke out of it. You know, I'm gonna get in there. And here we are talking about it. And it's working. And they're making a pot of money. Right. I'm sure they're gonna make a ton of money. And I have God bless them.

It's just weird to me. And I had to view it. I've actually spent some time with both of them and they're fucking great. It'd be like being like a calendar. Check out this picture of my cock. And then you go, hey man, I don't want to see that. And I go, oh, God, you're coming off

real Christian conservative. Cocks are normal, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I show Cal and my cock and all of a sudden he gets all conservative on me. That's a thing. What are you gonna be weird. I just posted my cock on the internet just cuz everybody everybody's judging me All right, here's some on marks. I know what you say I'm gonna go with the Instagram. Yeah, I'm sure the comments are kind of light me up for them

Nice the cake and dance dog You can't light me up for them. Nice. The kick and dance, Doug. Yeah. I can watch this all day. Surprisingly captivating. Cats are fucking. There you go. So this is what TikTok should be. Cats doing cute little dancing.

The person doing the dance, the she's doing cute little person doing the day that she's work right. Imagine the time that you'd spend it this right because the carogues actually really. Yeah, and that cat's hands are very bendy. I don't know the break. So many joins in there. Cats are so probably. No, weren't you looking for a soft. Yeah,

these cats do yoga. So yeah, they so pull. Wait, who cats do yoga. They're like, yeah, they're so po. Wait, who posted that? Mark did. No, it was just something I saw a lot. That's great, bud. That's the kind of story of the week. Everybody wants to talk about an Haitian, that house fire,

but I'm into this cat. Cat dances. Who's this guy? Mark, Andre Feeley. Yes, so he was doing stand-up, but I actually thought it was pretty good. Who's the UFC fighter? UFC fighter. You have a UFC fighter. Oh, okay.

I don't laugh off your right at home because I've been in a relationship for six years to the same girl, and she don't laugh at anything I say anymore. We're six years in, so she's like four and a half years past thinking anything that I fucking say is funny. Like, she used to say shit like when we first started dating she'd be like she's like oh my god I love your sense of humor. You're so So funny and now she says shit like Everything's a big fucking joke to you, isn't it? Yeah, it's good

Now they're doing a UFC comedy jam, huh? They are is Brennan headlining that? He's got to be the most famous UFC. Yeah, so I mean in for sure. Yeah He's got to be the most famous UFC. Yeah, so I'm a median for sure. Yeah. That's cool. I don't think he'd want to. That's his first time. Brandon hates being associated with the UFC.

Like he doesn't like that. Could people stop on the street and go like, oh man, like they'll bring up fighting or do you ever want to get back and he's irritated by that question? Because I think he's still. Now, I've encouraged him to be like, I think you should bring it back more and talk about your fighting more. I think he's like at the end of a phase where he's like, I think you should bring it back more and talk about your fighting more. I think he's like, at the end of a phase, we're like, I don't wanna do, have anything to do with

like fighting in my comedy. That makes sense. I would do jokes about it. I think you could circle back. I do it first, the giant guy. And also maybe someone, because you know, not everyone that sees Brennan's job knows everything about Brennan's job.

So they might be thinking, oh, the size of this fucking guy. Right. You know, they might think that if he references it, yeah, I might help the the perspective you have now, even like whatever, 10 years out of the league, it's different. Yeah, every premise could start when when I was fighting. Because I mean, imagine there's must be some great material and like only he could do. Yeah, I can't say that. I've never been able to say when I was Fighting. Yeah, when they used to lock the cage Then I was there with another monster who's just getting okay

She heard pronouns and I'm a licensed professional counselor and sex therapist in eerie, Pennsylvania And today I want to talk about minor attracted persons. What is it and minor attractive maps? Minor attracted persons because they are probably the most vilified population of folks in our culture. And most folks are making incorrect assumptions about them without actually knowing much about them. And those assumptions create harm for an already marginalized population. You may have noticed that I'm using the term my retracted persons, sometimes abbreviated to maps. Instead of the more commonly used term, pedophile. Right.

And I'm doing this because the term, pedophile, has moved from being a diagnostic label to being a judgmental, hurtful insult that we hurl at people in order to harm them. Like the way we call you a bozo. You fucking dope. Person first language that recognizes that any label we might apply to a person is only part of who they are and doesn't represent everything that they are.

We are all people first with many different facets or parts of ourselves and this includes folks who are attracted to minors. I wonder if Anne Haysh would agree with this later. Right. I bet she wouldn't. Yeah, I bet she wouldn't. But, you know, when somebody like this gets up here and does this, it's just, it shows you what a fucking moron, like what morons on whatever size she's on, whatever side you wanna talk about. If it's this crazy far left, it's just as crazy as the far right or worse.

But, I mean, you're not doing yourself any favors. License counselor sex therapists, use license. Yeah, yeah, they are marginalized and vilified because I'd like to punch them in, I'd like to shoot them in the face. Yeah, I'm so tired of that kind of stuff. And I know that people, if you're a pet of about, about turn yourself in, or like, or voluntarily castrate yourself,

you know, or kill yourself, that's how, how's that sound? People are, oh, this guy. How, okay, before you start it, People are. Oh, this guy. How? Okay, before he started, who is, why does this guy pop up on everything I have? Because he, he gained the system. Yeah. He did some kind of a like, if he's subscribed to them, they have to post about him or something like that. So he was just getting. He has his hustles university. It was insane. Right. But it's small. You're all different channels, it's not one channel, right? It's okay.

Yeah, well, I'll just stop calling bad things clever. Don't like when you go, yeah, but we're taught, yeah, I know. We're talking about it because it's wrong. You think we should get out of that channel. And you go, no, but it is that channel. Right, are they smart? They're not smart, they're evil. But he's actually entertaining.

Oh, but what I was gonna say is like, my algorithm knows Jeff, man, knows me. It all, my whole every algorithm that's just showing me home runs, dogs, you know, beautiful women, boobs. Like it, it knows what I'm into. But then this guy will pop up and then also Millie Brown, whoever this fucking chick is, from Stranger Things.

Why is her shit popping up with this? I have to keep going, I don't like, don't send me stuff like this. It's always millibran homeruns baseball and this guy All right, so go ahead and I know no Andrew Tate I think that stands for wet ass pussy. I would have stands for yeah, so by Cardi B and someone talking to the stallion or some shit Complaining about the lyrics so I listen to the song I the lyrics. Everyone's saying they're degenerate and they're disgusting.

Sure. That's what women want. The OAP, wow. It's a sex manual for men. She's telling you exactly how to fuck. So the women don't leave you and don't cheat on you. So if you listen to these lyrics and you're like, oh, I can't believe she said what?

Oh my God, and you're offended by it. Yeah, within your little bitch. Not really. I don't want my kids to hear it, you dork. It's on the radio, you fuck. Yeah, obviously. I'm like, duh, duh, that's what they want. So they've always wanted.

People are. No, I don't want Brian Callan's kids going on the floor on TikTok, whapping. That No, I don't want Brian Collins kids going on the floor on TikTok Wapping that's what I don't want by the way. I don't want to I'm at a job for kids to sing it in the backseat to his lovely wife and him gone Wait, it's put that's what we don't like dumb. I see it. I'm grown up I can hear wet ass pussy. I don't want society running around bouncing their pussy on the kitchen floor. Do it at eight years old doing Instagram Reels. Yeah, but obviousness, unoriginal, obviousness. Yeah. Also, I also don't like to think of women like that because we were told to respect women. Now it's gone. Don't objectify us. All objectify us. Yeah. Yeah. Don't objectify

me. All objectify me. As a weapon. Don't objectify me, all objectify me. As a weapon. Yeah. I learned how wholesome Jeff is this episode. Yeah, I'm a good guy. Well, if a guy spoke that way, right? Can I spoke that way about the her and did a song like that, he'd be canceled.

So, let's talk about it. Well, it's like, we don't, like that's the, you can't say be respectful to us, but then also, hey, why can't I talk about buckets of fluid coming out of my pussy? You go, well, that seems like a crass way to talk. Yeah, crass is the right word. It's like, I'm not mad about me.

I can handle it. It's about being on the radio. I think it's just saying most of us have this sort of like, we do that. We all go, I don't know, it doesn't sit well with me. Yeah. It's like, I don't really want a society that embraces anything, anything goes. I get accused of being like sexist and a misogynistic,

just for in the tone of the way I like to joke about things. Correct. But yet, I've never met a female comic who isn't toxically masculine. Huh, every female comic I've ever listened to is just like, yeah, I told him he'd better use me and wear that. But it's always like this kind of bro talk. Yeah.

That's really interesting. So like I'm not allowed to be toxically masculine and even the slightest. Yeah. But when women do it, it's like, isn't that different? She'll say anything. Oh, she's wild. Yeah.

No, she's doing what we get in trouble for. Yeah. And I hate that inconsistent. Yeah, it seems stupid. That is sexist. That guy, I like that guy generally, but that was a terrible take on his part. Do you guys agree or disagree with me?

Am I wrong? I think he's just being, I don't take what he said seriously, because I think he's just, he's being a fireman. A fireman. Yeah, he's just being a I don't take what he said seriously because I think he's just, he's being a firecracker tool. Yeah. He's just being a firecracker. It's being silly and funny. The, the, the, nugget of the statement though is women want this. If you take it for that, it's going, hey, be basically, women want you to be sexually aggressive in the bedroom. That was my takeaway. Yeah. I think he's just being, he's just a guy

who he's got a good sense of humor. I think he's just being silly. And he's looking out, Landish. I love that, I love that he talks about having, if you have your friends, just put out a bunch of bubbly water, glasses, just pour a bunch of glass of water. And the first guy goes, ooh, bubbles. Yeah. Never speak to that guy.

I hope that, I hope that he sees me. I hope that guy sees this clip. I watched you do one of your little Instagram videos, buddy. And I liked it. So I was see more about this clip. I watched you do one of your little Instagram videos, buddy, and I liked it. So I was more about this guy. I liked it. And then I clicked on the next one, and you basically ripped off a Jordan Peterson quote,

like two or three in a row. And I go, all right, I'm done with this guy. You see, you know, Jordan Peterson didn't rip off an anti-tank quote. Oh, I know he did. I got a feeling that the brilliantly sophisticated clinical psychologist doesn't even know who that guy is They got it wants to fight the Paul twins. Yeah, whatever

Guys, look at the guards gone. Hey, where does pussy's for bro? I think that's a fight that could happen. Yes. I hope so. Yes. No, can he first call them out back when Jake Paul call this kind of Ruggler just fucking world champion. Yeah, Well then that maybe it won't happen because of that. Jake, we're all hoping for it now. Jake and Logan both sound good. I get them mixed up, but I like Logan Dish. New Molly he'll discover that strongly stimulates hair growth. That guy looks like there's a lot of hair though.

Yeah, so I feel like you know, it's a great hair line for him. Somebody's scientific problems are like, well, just give it 10 years, whatever. We are on the verge of something big, I think. And all the time, see, I'll get little grayer stuff like off the internet. Like, oh, this is a thing you could put on your head that binds to the Androgen receptor in your scalp.

It's not, you can't buy it at Walmart, but I can pay Bitcoin for it and get a powder and mix it with me. You know, so there's all these things that are like, they have this powder that's being sent to me from Russia. It's just approved by the, you know, we are trending in this direction of having way more. That's the only part of getting older that I'm not crazy about is the,

I think about my hair. A lot. Yeah. I want this. People talk shit about my hair on this podcast. They say, oh, he's got a comb over or whatever. It's not a comb over, it's just, I go like that. It's just a cool style.

They go comb over. Are you going to comb over? A comb over is where it's a ball. Do you got a comb at Are you going to go all over? Come over as well as a ball. Do you got a comb at all? Yeah, I say any combing of your hair is a good word. Guys, it's commenters. Get a little grassy. They get in there.

They try to find what you're insecure about. They go, oh yeah. Looks like Jeff wants to. Yeah. We should target Jeff's hair. They just want to run their fingers through it. Yeah, yeah. It's okay. It's all here.

Don't worry about it. I'm a boy. A lot of great fight on kid army people there too. Oh, yeah, it's okay. It's all here. Don't worry about it. I'm a boy. A lot of great fight on kid army people there too, so. Oh, man, I love for that. I like your guys' audience. They like? They're my favorite people. With a few trolleys. Wait, so what is it? So what is this? This will help me grow my hair good? I mean, there's like what? Mark, this is like the second or third newest things that came out this year about hair,

like actual advancements and potentially regrowth of hair. Specifically, yeah, there's a few different mechanisms in this one. came out this year about hair, like actual advancements and potentially regrowth of hair. We've got some hair. Specifically, yeah, there's a few different mechanisms in this one. I'm selling mine. Promising because it activates hair growth in the human hair follicles. Because it's one thing to stop it, like Benastroids basically, it's stopping the falling out.

Anti-Androgen's on your scalp, stop the falling out, but Monoxidil stimulates hair growth by causing more blood flow to the area. And if you can stimulate like microneedent people, you're supposed to do that. You do that to stimulate the follicle. If you can do that, you can grow a lot of hair. Hey, how do you know about all this?

You got a great head of hair. I got the best. Well, like you, I don't want to, you know, you don't want to lose it. Take it for granted and they're like, wait a second, like, you know, you both have good hair lines. I have a great hair. Stop it, you're crazy.

You forgot. Yeah, you look good, buddy. Stop it, you're crazy. You forgot. Yeah, you look good, buddy. I'm worried you're gonna break that tiny chair. I know. It's a. We've got the biggest guy in here. He's sitting on what appears to be like a little fat makeup tray or something.

Tiny chair. He's got jeans and combat boots with no fucking socks, bro. You're dubbed, dude. That's my guy. All right, what's next here? So this is from King and a Scene, but let me play this clip for you real quick. One of your co-stars, or even yourself,

which you smash if you were a girl, bro. I already rendered the position of that shit. I'ma send them over. And y'all, let me know. Y'all lookin' pretty good. Would it take 10 beers five beers any beers Maybe you just have horny Gang gang buzz buzz So

So this guy did a face swap on all the guys so Theo von Brendan Eric Griffin, Kristalia Then Nick and me okay as girls as women, right? Okay, and you and to ask, would you smash if you guys had vaginas? This is good, all right. So check this out. Oh my God. That's the oh. That's the oh. Uh, all right, for sure.

I mean, yeah, all right, for sure. Uh huh. Yes. There you go. There's Brendan. Yes. Uh, I mean, come on, dude. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Here's Chris. Yeah, dude. Definitely. Here's Chris. Yeah, dude Definitely, that's that's probably the best one so far. You think so. I mean it might be the hair I think it picked up big-bodied lady too because that's a fucking funny like I imagine like white hips. Yeah picture to wide even though it's crystal His I don't know how wide our jaw goes. Why is she hiding her face? Yeah, she's doing that trick

There's Eric nope I'm actually hiding her face. Yeah, she's doing that trick. There's Eric. Nope. Absolutely. Why are you fucking not? That took a minute. God, I'm sorry, Eric.

I'm funny. I'm funny. No, dude. It took such a great job. I would fuck Eric Griffin before I'd fuck that lady. There's Nick. Uh, no. Not terrible.

And they did me so wrong. I don't know this person here. Jim. Oh, yes. No. Jim, I got a pass on that. I would pass on it. I got a block.

I guess Asian, it might be steel, might be steel. Feel too young too. It's about as a bonus ride. Oh my God. That's a big, just got as a girl. That's him just dressed up as a girl. No, it'll face while. It's my coming out party guys.

I am a transgender woman. When was this? This was on the set of 50 Central in 2017. That is character called Marquisha. Do you should send that photo to WWE and go I want to be I want to be in the women's division. They would they would. They would. Whole movie plot is a little bit more. To Connecticut and give you like a trial. And don't change your voice, that's your voice. Yeah, and you say, yeah, you shave the shit and you just go, yeah, I'm a woman.

I dare to question it. Yeah. And what's my wrestling name? You start breaking bitch. She her. Yeah. And the whole story line's like trans woman. She's like, she raw, I'm just like, he man, she raw,

she her. That's all right. You'd get killed by that crowd. They'd be like, he's trans, fuck that book that they'd be like get that dude out like retro and trans parity of current events and these things well you know you got lia whatever names women who lia Thompson Thompson she's a trans woman so I ever started talking about the trans people and athletes and women or she's

swinging you're a swim and she's women she's women she's women she's swim so got a still got a piece on her, too. She's swimming so fast. She's swimming as fast as a guy. She swims so fast. She's got the top 500. She comes to guys. She could swim against guys.

If she was on testosterone, if she was normal back to where she was when she was a guy, she'd be, I think she could give some of those boys a run for them. Yep. She'd be in the top 500, but it said that she went over to the women and took first. Okay. Yeah. Went over to the women.

I mean, yeah, she's a woman. All right, guys, tomorrow, Salt Lake City, Utah wise guys. I'll see you there. I got one show tomorrow, Thursday, Nashville, Tennessee, is eighties August 26, 27 Friday, Saturday. That's next weekend. Man, Raleighayn, he's August 26th, 27th, Friday, Saturday, that's next weekend. Man, Raleigh Goodnights, September 8th, 910. These are all my favorite plays.

Yeah, San Jose, California, September 15th, 17th, Spacan, September 22, 24th. Do you go real clean when you're in Utah? Or do you just do your normal stuff? I do not know, normal stuff. I got to talk to that guy. He's talking to me. He's talking to me. Oh, really? Yeah. He's talking to him. Yeah, he's talking to me. Yeah guy. He stopped booking me. Oh really?

Yeah, I talked to him. Yeah, I was going to the Brendan. August 26th for Brendan. Get your tickets. He's doing a tough motor run that the 27th. Can buy tickets to a tough motor run? Appleton, Wisconsin, he's at the, what the fuck is it called?

There's a club there. Yeah, but just a club. Yeah, I like comedy club. At a brick house. Something like that anyway September 8th To September 10th on Terrier Ontario improv. September 15th to the 17th and then Jeff Here's my dates Pittsburgh this Saturday Pittsburgh in Claytheter and then August 25th and 27th I'm in St. Louis at the Helium comedy club September 9th and 10th, I'm at Hyenas in Fort Worth, Texas. And then I'm going back to Hyenas, September 23rd and 24th to play the Dallas Club. Come get tickets for that.

Also, if you subscribe to my Patreon, you get free tickets to all these shows. You can just show up and say, I'm a Patreon subscriber and I leave you tickets. And my Patreon's cheaper than the tickets will be. It's just $10 just subscribed to my Patreon. So it works out. Get free tickets if you want. But Pittsburgh this Saturday, please come see me. Also shout out to my boy Tyler Barker,

huge fan of this podcast. He's gonna be super excited that Tyler Barker, one of the biggest fighter in the kid fans out there. Love you Tyler. All right buddy, well thanks for doing this. Love you bud. Let's say you're always welcome. I'm happy to. Well, thanks for doing this. Love you, bud. Let's say you're always welcome.

I'm happy to be here. I love it here. You're great. Oh, yeah. Also, there's a podcast on this network that I have called 12 Packs with Jeff Dye. Oh, really? Where we cracked beers and cracked baseball cards. Not baseball.

Any cards. It's going to move to the main network. Yeah. I would love to have you guys on it. I'm doing it in my podcast. I started a new podcast. I'm doing the Brian Calancho. Yeah.

It's just me. Just you talking. Yeah. Howancho. Yeah, it's just me just talking. Yeah, how long is it like an hour maybe last sometimes? I'm not doing a lot. Whatever you feel it. And then I got conspiracy social club, of course, on rock, and we keep growing. And best of what's the control of the social group? I've never lost an episode.

It's very soon on best of YouTube, Brian Calon. Dotcom slash people are loving it. Brian Cal comedy. Dotcom. What is the conspiracy one about? Are YouTube.com? Wait, YouTube.com's that's the one. They've already stopped trying to write.

What are you asking? What's conspiracy social club? Conspiracy was, it was Sam Tripley comes up with conspiracy and I debunk it. Oh good. And it's just like fucking, That's pretty fun. Yeah, it's great.

Does Sam really believe all those? I think he does. Yeah, he knows it's great is whenever a conspiracy guy and I'll put Sam in this camp. I love that guy But I will say like it's like it's always like a really good argument Oh, that's pretty interesting and the things pretty interesting and then you'll go you might make a counter argument that it makes good sense Yeah, and he'll be like it's all about money, dude Like then it's like a vague kind of like thing where you go, well that's not a good argument. It's like, it's like,

it's all mirrors dude. And you go, what? That's the argument. It all comes down to power man. And you go, well, that's not a good argument for this. Well, that's my take on a lot of that. Sam's the best, I love that fucking guy. And he's so funny.

Sam is so fucking funny. Yeah. You know, your comic, it's hard to make your laugh after a while, you've seen so much. That dude kills me. He's so funny, Sam is so fucking funny. You know, you're a comic, it's hard to make you laugh after all, you've seen so much, that dude kills me. He's great. I summed up the comedy surfer the first time, like live ever, I'm seeing him into that one show. Comedy chaos?

Yeah, he's great. It was, I did a leave the last week, or I think I did it last week, and Sam Tripoli was so sweet. He said, because he looks like a crazy guy. You know, or any behavior, you think he's crazy if you met him. But if you met him, he's like the nicest guy in the world.

And in the green room, he just kept me like, hey man, I'm sorry. You know, I know you're here, but like I got to put three more on, then he's talking about it. Like that doesn't happen every night of my life. Yeah. The bookers or the manager,

they put me on whenever they want. They'll go two more than you, or oh, I need you to go next, or oh, hey, can you, you gotta go last. They never are like a polygetic. Like, he was like, I feel terrible, man. I gotta put you at this spot. I was like, whenever you want, it's your show.

You can put me, you can bump me if you want. Like, it's your show. I know, but he's just such a thoughtful guy. Refreshfully. And he's like, next time I have you on, man, I'll get you like a third, you know, it's like, okay. Yeah, whatever, I'm happy doing whatever. Yeah. Nice guy. He's the best. All right, Jeff, I'll get you like a third, you know, I'll say, okay, whatever, I'm happy doing whatever. Yeah.

Nice guy. He's the best. All right, Jeff, die. Love you, boys. I'll let you go get to your, go back to sleep. Yeah, go to go back, do some Pilates. Yes.

Step class. You're gonna do Pilates. Stretch, slab. Watch some porn, go to bed. Do you watch porn? Yeah. I don't really watch porn. Ever?

Well, I got a girl, I don't know, I'm just not into it anymore. I stopped watching it. Missing out, dude. Probably, what got a girl. I don't know. I'm just not into it. I stopped watching you missing out Probably what you're do you have a go-to milk? Really? Yeah, yeah, it's the best you don't say so you got a porn hub and just got a milk milk All right Okay Chicken I like it. I'm not Okay Checking I like it. I'm not

Fucking bully Poor poor notorious porn bully just three 15. We got reads. Yeah, so no sign off. Oh, it's the pirate of the kid. We're out. We love you guys