The Fighter & The Kid - Ep. 837: Josh Wolf

Episode Date: October 13, 2022

Josh Wolf stops by the studio and the boys talk his new show "Family Tussle" on his youtube, tough crowds in Roswell, Callen's love hate relationship with Archery, the Elon Musk of rattlesnakes, fighting for seat territory on southwest, Bryan eating a pigeon head, and Josh's laughable ignorance of truffles.  Onnit: onnit.com/fatk 10% OFF  Upgrade your closet with Rhone and use FIGHTER to save 20% at  https://www.rhone.com/FIGHTER   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's the fighter and the kid Hyde the run it back Cause we back at it again Yeah, we gon' keep it moving like it's never gonna end When it was brining, when it was bright And when it was just talkin' to friends We got the kid galling on the left With the fighter on the right

Hey, how'd they do it right? Cause we comin' at your lock Back with the team I'd be keepin' OG, my CTV I had to do it Yes, we did Cause we back at it again It's the fighter and the kid It's the did, cause we back at it again. It's the fight on the kids.

It's the fight on the kids. Back at it again. It's the fight on the kids. It's the fight on the kids. Back at it again. It's the fight on the kids. It's the fight on the kids. It's the fight on the kids.

It's the fight on the kids. This is really the fight on the kid. We're out. Just my American nuts. That's what they are. I want to talk to Josh about that jacket. I want to talk about his adventure when he was somewhere in the middle of Albuquerque or somewhere and you went into that gas station and it had what? It had, okay, I'll tell you what I bought. I'd like to know. Wait, Philistin, really you don't buy a talk to, fill the rest of it.

Well, look at his jacket. I said, I went that jacket and then he, I did a little, he said he got it. Well, I did a little, that jacket. Yeah, I bought it at gas station in New Mexico. What? Yeah, tell me more. I the gas station the sign when I was driving by and by the way gas station purchases in the south and in the west You can be amazing because some of them have like, but this one said

Mexican food donuts and stuff. I'm in Stump it stuff. So I bought this jacket. I bought a bone arrow. I bought fireworks. That's a nice leather. Now that's human. Yes. That's human. That is a Native American man's skin, but that's fine. Yeah, dude.

Because when you say stuff, it's true that you could find like you could find like a dehydrated heart, a human heart. It did? You know? You know, a human skull. Yeah, like a necklace of ears, voodoo stuff is all you never know but also a poncho Firework stuff you need yeah ceramics. Yeah, the bone air like the bow. Yeah, oh fucking for sure Miller light You know the same cuz I love the best the best the best

The boy that I've ever had I'm just gonna say the best jerk. They have that they don't have like the bullshit No, dude. They have real jerk. It's made in the flavors are Well, it's made from the farm yonder in the backyard. It's made from the fall like Blueberry the for one of the favorite like blueberry or habit habit narrow fucking man bear meat They'll have bear meat. They'll have armadillo. They'll have all kinds of different it meets all you know armadillo right now Armadillo are you still just me? Now for the last two weeks of happen. And my headache is popping right now.

That's why I'm whiskey. You're through my headache. Whiskey and meat is what they ate as they were settling in the West. Now let me ask you this. Whoever made this jacket, that's all they did. So come on. How much was the jacket?

Come on man, how much you think? Let's take a couple of guesses. I'm gonna say, I'm gonna tell you right now. Wait, this is New Mexico? New Mexico. Did they serve green chili at this place? No, no rest. Well, on the side, actually, there was a restaurant.

I didn't go over there. That jacket was $89.99. That jacket was $49.99. If we go prices right, it's $75 that would be. But you were actually closer, yes. I mean, this is a $75 jacket. That's a steel. Dude.

Now, if a bow and arrow, yes. Could you use it to kill small game? If I had a bow and arrow skill, I believe so. Oh, you got a bow and arrow and the jacket? Yeah. Did it come with the jacket? No, but I wish it had. Grand. Great incentive.

Yeah. They should be like, you know what? You can have this bone arrow. Oh, I also put some maracas. Well, you need those. That's a fun. Can I add a lava lamp? I, they're there, but I didn't buy it.

Okay. Can I tell you what I used the maracas for? So I, I like to, I don't, I'm not a good golfer, but I like to golf with my brothers and my dad because it's just bonding shouldn't. But we only golf here in LA or in the desert in Vegas. And there's always a danger rattlesnake sign. So I pack a Maraca in my golf bag

because I'm terrible at golf, but I like making people scared. So I always mention it once and twice. I'll be like, hey guys, remember this rattlesnake's out here, this rattlesnake's. And the first time somebody goes in the wood and pokes around for their ball, I just shh. That's gonna shit. Fucking dude. When you think you touch a rattlesnakes out here, there's rattlesnakes. And the first time somebody goes into the wood and pokes around for their ball, I just shh. That's gonna fit me.

Fucking dude, when you think you touch a rattlesnake, you know like in the cartoons where your feet, yes. Yeah, but you mean me, mean it. And those rattlesnakes are loud. Well, now in Texas, because people kill them all the time, they've evolved to not rattles. What do you mean, man? They stop rattling, can I be able to get killed

with their gums themselves away. So one smart rat that Elon Musk of Ralph snakes went, I'm just going to stop shaking my tail. And then I went, that's a great idea, dude. Every time we do it, we get killed. So he called a council among the other snakes. Gather around. Gather around everyone. I have an idea. No more rattle. No more rattling equals death. And then someone's like, hold on. That's what he ran for office on the snake raises hand Let's just quick question. Let's cover a thing. Yeah, there's nothing more dumbass. The snake rattled his tail So you everybody look at him and he goes we don't do that anymore. I was I supposed to raise my hand use your tongue

He's a little tell that little tell I I wish they would continue to rattle That's one man's opinion, but I like you bio fucking We'll get in her pathology in a second. Why did you why did you purchase a goddamn bone arrow? Why not? It's there. It's a gas station. Yeah. Slurpy, jerky, bone arrow, human skull, fireworks. My plan was I had mushrooms with me. My plan was, and I bought some fireworks. My plan was to somehow try to light the arrow

and set up fireworks and shoot them when I was tripping. Are you 13? Yeah, basically. I love that idea. That's a ridiculousness, that's it. Zero bow and arrow skills. I've never shown before. You can't just pick it up and do it. Can I just say something about that?

I've got a lot of friends. We all have friends who are super in the archery. One of them's name is Joe Rogan and they're a couple of the guys. I think that I don't care about archery. Now I'm an adult and I know it's a skill set. I could give less of a fuck about archery. I care more about what the weather's like in I don't know Beijing right now. Yeah, like I could give a fuck. Oh, do you are you good at shooting? Did you kill? Did you kill that elk but wait with a bone arrow? Didn't you call it in with a horn?

I'm a dude this pussy's mind Who's basically is like, I'm a dude, this pussy's mind. They have fish. Who the fuck said that? He's lying. You can't fish the elf. Yeah. Who said that? Somebody says something and then you go, oh he's 10 yards away.

Sick. Or you pose with it. You're like killed it. Or they spray the trees with like, so it smells like a male, so you get the females in. You just honey dick them. You're honey dick them. They shoot them in the face.

They walk towards you. Let me ask you this. It's how the Native Americans look. What is, what do you feel is worse? You're hunting dick and I shoot them in the face. They walk towards you. Let me ask you this. It's how the needle makes it. What is, what do you feel is worse? That, we're sitting up in a stand, just waiting for the animal to walk past. Also suspect.

Because that's not hunting, that's waiting. Yeah. And I would say the kind of hunting I did with Ronella, where you actually walk and you stalk the deer, that chits really hard. So I believe this is the case. I know that when sniper training school a lot of times they correct me if I'm wrong but I've heard this from fairly reliable source. No but I know people who listen to this are in the military but this this stays when you when you fucking stalk an elk with a rifle, okay, when you actually go to stocking out, they can smell you a mile away.

They can see you a mile away. So they are so smart. They see you and they're like, I'm getting the fuck away from you. So the way you have to stock an elk is a very similar skill set as how you stock a human enemy. You can't be seen and you got to take a long fucking shot. You know, we know this. Yeah, that's difficult. Who's an expert bow hunter? It is Foxworthy. Jeff Foxworthy is Jeff free Foxworthy. Dude, it is like world class. Is he?

Yeah. Well, I got to know John Dudley, who's the best in the world? And that's shooting. John, yeah, John 66230. It just looks like a fucking crazy athlete, which he was. And he's the best in the world. And there he is. You know, and so when you're on that level,

that's a whole different thing. You have to wear a hat like that. Yes, that's a whole different level of his hand. All the more the hat, like I see a hat like that, I'm like, that's like cauliflower ears for fighters. And definitely hat like that? Yeah. Definitely wearing oak leaves.

It's a zam. If you see a hat like that, for fighters and definitely like that. Yeah, definitely wearing Oakley's it's a Zanzy how like that running San practice he's a fucking these savage yeah, what's up kids Let's take a little break from chatting your air off about bows and arrows with Josh Woff and Brian Kellen and myself They're both taking shifts right now, so you get your boy here doing the reads But I will be in San Jose this Thursday, Friday, Saturday, San Jose improv is this freaking week. We just announced all new tour.

It's a oh, he thick tour. And we have new dates, new cities. Just got to add it on there. We'll be announcing a big UK tour for next year. We got a lot of fun stuff coming up. So go to thickboy. Or FATKZ.com right now. Get your tickets. But this week at

San Jose next week Salt Lake City, Utah, that's October 20 through 22 at Wiseguys. Calgary, October 27th of the rooftop downtown Calgary. Thursday show almost sold out. So we add a show on Friday out there. November, heavy Texas. We have San Antonio, November 3rd through the 5th at LOL. Houston, November 10th through the 12th. A bunch of dates in between then, but the next big one is December 15th through the 17th, washing DC with my favorite clubs, DC improv, come get you some December 15th through the 17th. We'll be announced a bunch more dates for Ohi Thicc Tor. Get you some. Also that sweet, sweet nectar. The award-winning nectar from your thick friend here is just restocked.

If you go to thickboy.com and get your sum right now, it gets delivered to your door. Get you that award-winning thick nectar, tiger, thick, it's available right now. Finally back in stock, batch two coming in hot. You'll see the awards on the bottles. Get your sum right now, delivered to your door. This episode of The Fighter and the Kid is brought to you by BetterHelp. That's right.

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when you want to be a better problem solver, therapy can get you there. Visit betterhelp.com slash fighter today. Get temp stuff for your first month. That's betterhelp.com slash fighter. Fellas, you know when you're just wearing something uncomfortable, man, you're like, God, this is not comfortable. This is too tight. It's wrinkled.

I've been wearing all day. I'm so scared of happy. I'm so scared of the movies. So let's go to plays. Let's go to comedy show. So let's go to B-Shops, new tour, oh he thick, and I'm coming straight from working this shirt. It's all rink, I look terrible.

Well, you need some rone in your life, man. You need some rone, because they make dope shirts, dope pants, they got it all to help you look great. And they have a shirt that they sent to me. I rock it, my dad actually stole it from me, this rone shirt, it's the commuter shirt, it's a button up, it's breathable, it's flexible, and it's fantastic. It's also four-way stretch, so you have to worry about it, and also it's wrinkle-free, like I told you, you don't want to sit

in that work driving your car. You get out, shirts all wrinkly, you're going to dinner, you're going on a date, you're going to comedy show, you look ridiculous, and if you got Ron Daddy, if you got Ron, you look fantastic. So if you want to jump on board, look dope at work, look dope at the theater, date night, at the comedy show, get the commuter shirt from Ron and guess what? You head to ron.com slash fighter, use promo code fighter, you save 20% off your entire order. That's 20% off your entire order when you head to

rhon.com slash fighter use the code fighter it's time to find your corner office comfort. Have you seen the Japanese masters of archery? Have you read Zen in the art of archery? No, small book and port and box. Yeah. Very good. Are you ready? No, no, it's about archery. Yeah, but in Japan. It's about life. But about archery in Japan, though overall, right? But it's a matter for for life. So it's about archery, but in Japan. It's about life. But about archery in Japan, the overall, right? But it's a matter of for life. So it's counting the hat, right? No, Zen and the Archer suits.

Is how you breathe when you hold all that Zen shit. I'm out. Yeah. Are these pictures in the book? No, but if you watch, go to YouTube. I'll tell you who I want to shoot. I mean the guy in the middle. Which one, which one do you think?

Yeah, you want that dude? Yeah, well they would practice they would practice riding on a horse and Splitting an arrow or or shooting a burden in air all these crazy. You know why? Nothing else to do right well, you know why yeah, cuz back then yeah Nothing to do yeah hold on right yes, but sir nothing sir I would say go to the master archer from nationality graphic. I don't know why like there's the head above the head shot To do well, it's what they survive, but sir I would say this it maybe you learn about life if you master one thing you master everything is not the idea

Yeah, you're just shitting on our to me. Yeah, didn't you just tell me how dumb I said you don't give it to Seconds and give off. Hey, two seconds ago. don't give a two seconds I give a Hey, two seconds Oh, but I was with the win. Hey, two seconds told us I care more about The mission of fog then pull up Zen in the art of archery. I've actually researched it for 10 years I do not care about archery, but I do like this craftsmanship this master Japanese master this this this sensei who makes his own bows So you do care about archery. How long is this video chin? It's 11 minutes too long my attention just He's wearing glasses. Oh

Then he lowers it. Yeah, that's But why is but what's that looking at release? Oh? No, I need to hear that No, I need to wait to lay it. He's wearing a hat like I want you to take his hat in Is that a hat or a headband wait? Yeah, there was no need for that well Target he goes but he waited to That's a war cry and this the last thing you hear is you die.

You go like this, watch. No, you're the owl. You go, you go, what? From this year. And that seems, that's has been a hell. By the way, seem that warning seems kind of late. Yeah, I'm already like, I'm already hitting me with the arrow.

And then you're like, hey, well, I'm going to tell you this. When you get, when you get killed with an arrow, it goes through your body. It doesn't stay in your body. I'll really tell you this, when you get, when you get killed with an arrow, it goes through your body, it doesn't stay in your body. I'll really get shot. Go through your body, and it goes right through her,

and you're gonna do this, you're gonna be tough, and you're gonna go like, you're gonna be like, oh dude, I got it. Well, I can do it right. Hey dude, so that's it. Yes, that's it. Bleh! An arrow doesn't go through your body.

I've seen too many moves. It's like an outspotting problem. Yeah, so it's right through the outspotting. Now, no, go through your body. I've seen too many moves. That's like an outspot about him. Yeah, search for the outspot. Now, no, go through your body. It can't. Yeah, go straight through it now. Go through the two tears body. If it's the right, if it's the right,

I thought you want to hit him up here so it doesn't go all the way through, right? Well, you want to hit him up in the heart. Yeah. You do, have you know? Now, a little fact for you, you know, I'm a dragon, a bozen arrow. I did not know you were a shooting bozen arrow.

Yeah. You should have, you grew up shooting arrows with a ball. Yes, right? Bozen arrows now when did you do that since probably fucking second grade through eighth grade? Okay, so you my own Bone air you go the range you practice I think you're excited to the range SJ. Yeah, can I see your pullback? Sure. What does that mean? I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go.

I'm going to have to go. I go like this, I go. And by the way, when I breathe, you know they have triggers on them now too, where's your scope? There you go. So here's the back at locks and trigger. If I'm shooting you at a distance with a scope or a bone air watch this, this is my breathing. Breathe in, watch this.

And when I'm out of breath, that's that pause, that's my life. Now you left the bone air, I had assumed it was your bone air, it was it, it was wood Yeah, man, it wasn't like Recombed yeah Gas station It's boring

I mean it's my man just gas station You got a cup of chili And you decide to get a Bone And you decide to get a fucking You're a Good Bonero And you're like Have you ever seen the Japanese? No! I wanted the stories about Albert Cookie But I wanted in the show that

The Japanese got splitting the arrow He split it out But your told us before that bullshit You don't give a fuck So we already know that, dude I want to watch about shit that none of us care about He wasted all of our lives Fuck I want to watch about shit that none of us care about you wasted over lives That's a long archery tangent the longest archery tangent ever

That's our time guys. Thank you for That video and tunes like this Yeah, wait, what were you doing in New Mexico? Oh dude? I did a little tour a little theater tour down there Nice. Yeah, it's those great. You carry a weapon when you're in the middle and he does it Size upon arrow. I do not carry a weapon. You don't care blade. I do not carry a blade Well, you know, I was an albacricky. Let me tell you something I'm gonna play an albacricky and well tell in the story Let me tell you something. My mother played an Albuquerque.

Albuquerque and Roswell. Well, I'll tell in the story. And Albuquerque. When you had to kick somebody out. Oh, yeah, yeah. Albuquerque. And Roswell. There'd be farting out there, man.

That was not. Not been out there. Green chili. You. You. There's fart hard, dude. Been in a bunch of times. OK, but.

Yeah, so there's more to Albuquerque than that. You're right. Yeah, I did see a bumper. Wait, wait, wait. Is it Albuquerque than that. You're right. Yeah, I did see I did see a bumper So good as that Albuquerque you be farting. Yeah, that's actually Dick Boymer. Yeah That's the T-shirts I'm gonna do out there. I'll make somebody out who kicked somebody out in Roswell And the guy at the club straight up told me hey We usually don't kick people out unless we call because everyone's packing

Yeah, yeah, it's just such a good guy with a guy just out of control. The guy was, look man, my show is our super good vibes across the board. It's a fun time. Yeah, man, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, another jacking on. Yeah, dude, we're just having a good time. You bring your stuff on stage. I, yeah, and I'm not, I'm just not tolerant. I've been doing this a long time.

I don't have any tolerance for it. And if you're gonna disrupt the show, I'm gonna kick you the fuck out. You know what's weird? In a way, half a second. Yeah, it's not weird, but all the, like all the comics we've been doing for a long time, like obviously, I'll entertain some of it

and like roast them then if it goes on, it's like, okay, we gotta get scattered. Like, Jokoy, Delia, dude, when there's hecklers, I've seen Jokoy go in a big theater. Hold on, it's top set, turn the lights on. This guy out and hold away there, to he lose, lights turn back on. This is, then he goes.

If you, Delia shut the fuck, get out. Like holy shit, just the older, broken, they don't take. Shit. For me, it's this. If you're part of the show I'm cool with that and then if I feel like it's gone on too long I'll tell you hey this enough we're not gonna do anymore if you are not part of the show If you're talking to people at the table if you're making the show not good for the people around you

Zero tolerance. Yeah, I'm not your teacher. I'm not your fucking father. This is my job if you're fucking enough for everybody I actually parties are not allowed to sit in anywhere near the front row I'm not your teacher, I'm not your fucking father. This is my job, if you're fucking up for everybody else. I'm not actually at parties, I'm not allowed to sit anywhere near the front row. It's crazy. Because they just are not interested in comedy. You know what, Mairndas? You know what, Mairndas, down the set of show. He'll get there, and he'll get on stage

and looking at the back, and if he sees it, it's like, you're back right up, are you? That's right, party up. Get him out of here, freedom starts. Out. He was all refunding your money myself. Get out.

Toh, that's fucked up. If they're not there for a show. He knows, he's been there, like, nope, absolutely not, get out. He was already fun your money myself. Get out. Do you know what I'm talking about? Did they're not there for a shot? Wow. He knows he's been there like, no, absolutely not. Get out. Whoa. Savage. I will tell you, for me right now, without a doubt, and we've been doing this a long time, dude, I've never had more fun on stage.

I've never enjoyed my job more than I am right now. I've never been more invigorated to be on stage. Do you know why, dude? I'm a different person than when I left LA. I really feel like a different human. And I stopped. You think you're better than I'm stuck? I am. Yeah. It's Jacket Brendan. Look at this guy.

You got away from the vortex of LA and just the tees are stuck. I remember talking about this. I want to hear about it. Dude, here's the biggest thing, what I stopped doing. I always did this with my stand up. Like, I feel pretty fearless on stage. I'll try shit, because I've never considered something not working on stage of failure.

I've always looked at comedy as a puzzle, right? And so if a piece doesn't work, if you put together a thousand piece puzzle, you're gonna try some pieces that don't work. You don't think of that as failure. You think, I just need to find another piece. And I've always thought of comedy that way, which is why I've always been super free to do whatever.

But I've started to look at my life that way. I no longer think of things as failure. I just need to try a different piece. That small switch has changed my entire life, dude, because I don't judge myself anymore. Small switch has changed my entire life, dude, because I don't judge myself anymore. And it took you to get out of LA to realize that. I started because I'm not listening to him when I was here, and I'm gonna be honest with you.

I would compare myself to you, to you. Why is there a podcast, why aren't I on this show? How come I'm not doing this stand up? And I'm not that dude. I'm genuinely happy for people's success. You're one of the best people I have ever. I'm not a genuinely happy. Yeah, you do, you're good. For people's success. You're one of the best people I have ever, I mean, all bullshit aside,

you're one of the best motherfuckers I've ever met. I mean, I think think what he did for, for, listen man, when you're going through your shit, when, when Brian can be on the show, name a single calling, they would not come on the show. Absolutely not. Seize too hot.

Can't do it. We love you, man. We love Brian, but you just step you know and you just step right fuck and I call Josh and you're like I'm there man I went are you shitting me dude like I'm there, but that's why I told you like you're like hey can't come on show I'm like but you just the way you check in on people and and the way you're genuinely so happy for people is Such a rare thing and there's a purity to you I think it might come from the fact that you had to raise Three kids on your own. I remember I knew you back then Baba. Yeah, I met you back then I knew you when your children were one children children. That's how long I've known you and I don't know man. I've watched you. I think what you're talking about is peace of mind and

I really appreciate things as I'm getting older too. I realize talked to myself in a really shitty way. We're always comparing He and I have the biggest problem with that like he and I always like just always moving forward never stopping to look around What's going on, you know, and that's so exhausting after a while? How makes Austin? It's exhausting. Look at dude and why why why I ripped my jeans. I did why compared so to your point Man, it's a great thing to say you're a little jack is smells like the liberty. Yeah, can we get in there? You know my brother said to me This is for you guys too. I brother. I remember complaining once and he goes Josh I

Want you to think about in the history of people who've done your job? I know you're comparing yourself to people who are more successful There's always people more successful in their history of people who have done your job You're in the 1% dude, what are you complaining about? You're in the 1% of people who have ever attempted this job. You're in the 1% of things. I wish my agent would talk to me like that. And I was like, I was like, fucking, fuck.

Like why? Of course, there's always Chappelle or Rogan or somebody who's, but that doesn't mean, I can't have this. There's nothing to do with you. Zero, zero. I had zero. And the lovely comics that are super negative, there's nothing to do with you. Zero, zero. I had, I had zero. I had, and then a lot of the comics that are super negative, it's like if someone just gets in there,

they're like, hey, this person's success has nothing to do with you. The reason you're so salty is because of you. Yeah. That's why you're like, I had two billionaires who have all the money, you know, break that down for me. They're pretty rational people and they said,

hold it, they said, I've made a lot of money, money, you know, but let's take a look at what you built Let's take a look at the odds when you go into it. Let's say look at how many people have actually done what you've done And he went through and boy I felt good about myself for a second I was like I because I never feel good about myself because I hate like I can't watch it It also be you wouldn't be where you are if you were always that guy, too But sometimes you step outside the box like yeah, I can't watch it. It also, you wouldn't be worried about it if you were always that guy, too. But sometimes you're stepping outside the box and you're like, yeah, I'm crushed. Right, it's like, take it easy.

But I write, but I don't even look, even remotely at it, but I think it is true that sometimes it's good to just be like, I'm not gonna compare myself with a Rogan or anybody else. I'm moving at my own fucking pace, man. And I'm doing the best I can. Brother, there's nothing wrong with being proud of yourself, either.

Yo, dude. I agree. Brother, there's nothing wrong with being proud of yourself either. Yo, dude. I agree. Let me tell you something. You have hit, when I think about, you've been at the pinnacle of two completely separate professions, dude. That is not an easy thing to do.

To tell the internet. Do you know what I'm saying? But think about this, dude. You were a perfect, in the UFC, that's the 1%. Yeah. What you're doing in podcasting? Uh, easily in the 1%. So like, and to do it in two separate professions,

you never, and to look at the car you drive and your family, you never step back and you're like, I've done a good fucking job. Not once. But, but that's what I'm saying. You have. It's not right. It's not what I'm saying. That's a bad thing. You have. It's not right.

It's not right. I have fashion over jeans on their torn. Now listen, I will tell you, and I tell you that's what I'm doing. I'm not doing that one. That is a pro. And I'm on a Southwest flight to San Jose tomorrow. Yeah. I'm on my way to Bridgeport tomorrow.

I'm going to Portland. I get to fly across the country. Dude, good looking Portland. Dude, I get to wake up at 6 a. I get to fly across the country. Dude, good looking Portland. Dude, I get to wake up at 6 a.m. I fly across the country. That's East Coast. That's East Coast. Oh yeah.

I fly across Atlanta 230. Then I fight and then I go from JFK to Bridgeport. Go straight there. Yeah. When you go to the other state there. It's how come? Oh, because. Well, it could be where some stand up.

But you remember just a second ago, you're like, I'm so grateful and then I'm grateful. I am fucking grateful. Well, it sounds like it though, right? No, no, no. For a second, you're like I'm so grateful and then I am grateful. I am fucking great Well, it sounds like it though, right? No, no, for a second there did it You know I'm not grateful when I get to fucking Burbank I brought tomorrow on your boarding group see Dude, yo, I ended and then when somebody goes what are you doing here? What do you mean I'm on a flight like South, West wing Yeah, it's burping. It's easier to get I know

Yeah, I see a boring group you a. What do you do? By the way, when you get on C I want to tell you big boy when you get on C everyone on the middle seat like get I hope this big motherfucker doesn't What's weird? A and you're like all the way against the window and then the big dude comes on and I want to go You know, why are the big dudes always getting on life? But it's a but but even to sit next to him like what are you doing? You what are you doing?

Yeah, come on You know I don't tell you now or come on You go back Can we go back? I'm your back. I'll put your bag up. No, just do that. Hey, I got my shovers on it. Yeah, big one. It's Southwest, right? Get in the back.

Hey, you want to meet the shovers? You want to move back? Yeah. By the way, if you're, it's the dripping over into my seat. You know when the big dude sitting next to you and like, it's like dripping under, it's oozing onto your side. That's when it's, it depends. side. That's when it's like, it depends, sometimes really uncomfortable,

sometimes it's warm and comfortable. You have to say, well this is like a big bean bag, dude. I had a, I had a, I don't know if Ralphie may hug me once, I was like, this is kind of warming, yeah, but also wet. Yeah.

But also wet. Oh my God. Yeah, it's moist, isn't it? Oh my God, yeah, it's moist, isn't it? The big guy's holding more than that. Oh my, I can even feel his undercarn. Just look at the fumes. Like Vegas fumes on your eye.

I don't want to patch him anybody, but I said to a bean bag of a woman. And there's no other word for it. She's so heavy. And she was so cuddly because she was so over on my side, but I just was like, sometimes this is- I'm gonna use you as my pill pill. You're my pill pill, and with feet,

you're a pillow with feet and all good, and God bless her. But what was, I have to say, that she had, she had brought, no, she brought all the snacks, and she was resting, please fantastic. She was resting them on her stomach. Does she offer you any?

Oh my God. Oh my God. You know, a sea otter eats a clans? Yeah, like they crack them on the tongue. I'm not trying to be addicted. She's reclining. Like the stuff. I'm telling you she was eating them,

just eating crackers. And I, I'm also like, I'm also like, okay, this is a little much now. And also you're being. There she is. Yes. I'm like, these are a little much.

And I just, I finally looked over, I was like, looking at it, I was like, I wanted to be like, you're gonna dive dive into it. The Brian would be like, he's a sea urgant. And I just, I finally looked over, I was like, looking at it, I was like, I wanted to be like, you're gonna dive dive. The Brian would be like, I'm like, he's gonna dive dive. I'm like, he's gonna dive. You think I give a fuck? Yeah, I'm on board and group.

She didn't, she didn't. I have snacks on my tits. Listen, if you're eating food off of your stomach in public, you're past giving a fuck about anything. She did not get, she was, I just wish she didn't off even. She didn't off for me, a fucking thing, nor did she say anything. But did not get, she was, I just wish she didn't off any. She didn't offer me a fucking thing, nor did she say anything.

But the interesting about her was that she was, she was very, very heavy and eating stuff, but she also had taken the time to put fake eyelashes on. And taking the time to put some makeup on and have some tattoos. So I'm like, and have different piercings. So I'm like, there's a level of vanity there, and then there's a level of, I don't give a fuck.

So the vanity stopped right below her chair, right above her chair. Like that's just like, I can have 17 neck rolls, and it doesn't matter. There's somebody else. God bless them. It was amazing. It's so comfy though.

But to see that, I feel like that's rare. Most times it's so uncomfortable. So it's so, and you gotta fight for that. The armrest, and then his thigh, the armrest is like this, just fucking, you know, but how do you sit in a regular seat being as tall as you are? Not even flexing, usually I'm in first class.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Be cool, everyone be cool. I mean, that's what I'm saying, I'm Southwest, I don't know how you're doing. I listen to my brothers, I can't, it's this much if we want to fly to LAX, first class, or it's a 50 minute flight on Southwest. Yeah, it's worth it.

But I'm trying to find out. First class is so. Yeah, it's worth it. It's so expensive. First class is so expensive, I can't do it. He's coasted this. Around here, it's like, he's got to. It's going out, too. It's, oh my God. I'm not paying $200, $300 for it. I don't fuck off.

I will suffer. There are a lot of people I know who have crazy money. And like my one buddy, he looked at the wine list where he's got a billion dollars. He looked the wine list and he goes. He goes, I don't believe it. I do, he goes, he goes, where at this, he's got a billion dollars. He looked the wine list and he goes, he goes, I don't believe it. I do, he goes, he goes, I. I.

He goes, I. Right? You're named six, so that's kind of weird, right? It's you, you're in with 60% of the billionaires. Keep going. What's funny about what you just said is that when I said billionaire, you know, he's not, you know what I said? He's a fine guy.

No, I, he has, I know he has about 200 million in the back. That's a lot, but it's not a thing. It's 800 million less though than what we did. 100 million, right? Still feels still just all the money. Still feels like a lot of money, which is all the money though. It still feels like a lot of money, but it's not. It's not a billion. Yeah, but it still feels like a billionaires like my boy, my boy who owns a restaurant in St. Bards. That restaurant must do really well. Well, he said that you'll get billionaires in there that will spend

$70,000 for 16 people on a check $70,000 But that's like it's buying you guys win right now that's now that's a guy's got that kind of money Yeah, I'm gonna spend 70 grand and not bad and I a billion. What do you give a fuck? Yeah? Yeah, but people like that will look at sometimes wine and they go You're charging a thousand dollars more than this wine retails For and I'm not gonna fucking do it because I pay for value. Yeah, you get a lot of that too So nice it like now you're trying to fuck me. You're trying to fuck me even though a thousand dollars means nothing You're trying to fuck me Okay, yeah, dude. What do you want to do? You're fucking you're off, you know, Melrose?

Well, I wouldn't you came here. I'd be like this. I'd be like you're fucking me. It's fine. Yeah. I would say nothing to are you kidding? I would actually almost feel good That you're fucking me and it doesn't bother me at all So I went I got married this weekend. I know congratulations Thank you. Now, I'm really I go to I go to French did you guys said, I tell the story already on the podcast when I go to French laundry, Thomas Keller. It's like, so French laundry is a new style menu. Nope.

But it's a tasting menu. It's so expensive. It's so expensive. So I go and I literally say to my, I say, I look at the wine list. I'm already paying so much money, but it's the most expensive restaurant, but it's the best restaurant. So, paying your wife? Me and my wife and the couple that married us,

okay, Mark and Kendra. The couple that I covered on your wedding night? It's so expensive, but I'm gonna say, I've split the bill, but I'm gonna say, what happened? Hold on, hold on, hold on. Can you give me an example when you say, why is it so expensive?

So it's $500 a plate just for the food okay between 300 and 500 Newsome and Pelosi they're like every night in during the pandemic like no man now now now it's the best food It's now Thomas Keller who's a genius. Yeah, who came out to the table one of my highlights because I love food so much His he's got a farm across the street. It's not it's it's that no, I mean as in hey go give me some eggs Across the street. It's not it's it's that no, I mean as in hey go give me some eggs Go walk across the street. Can you give me some fresh kale go pick it across the street that they get everything right there that guy Genius amazing man, okay, okay, I might My I know I won't I won't okay keep going shaving the white truffle the whole fucking thing. Oh you went truffle daddy Bob a wedding night Bob, but he pulled out an apple-sized fucking

and apple-sized truffle thing because you guys are getting married I wanna do something special. You know I'm a little truffle pig though. You are? White truffles, Bubba, white truffles. I like it a lot. In season, in season two months of year.

I was discriminated. In season two months of year, you get him in Croatia, maybe, Spain and France, certain areas maybe. Tell me you find him be. And you use pigs or dogs, truffle pigs. There's six feet under the ground. There you go,, truffle pigs. They're six feet under the ground. You're fucking.

Troubles are six feet under the ground. And by the way, you have armed guards protecting your acreage of white truffle. They're diamonds. They're diamonds. They're diamond truffles. And you're gonna get an armed conflict because the mafia comes in and tries to take your truffle.

Okay. Can I ask you a question as not a truffle conch. Blood truffles. Yeah. Isn't it just a mushroom? Somebody's never had white truffle. Hey, bring up white truffle, Jim. Bring up white truffle.

If I didn't have much of a better to last time. Josh, this game is this whole speech I is doing better than he is currently. Fuck. This is good. I've never had white truffles. That's a beat for those guys that are truffles. But however I get into this, is this going to be more to do him better, he's in his car and go fuck this. I never had white truffle So that's gonna be those guys at trouble. How about we get into this? Is this gonna be more interesting than the archery conversation? Yes, absolutely.

Yes, because they're truffles. I'll entertain it. Well the best part, but they're so good. The best part. I'll be there soon. Now you can't eat that food without good wine, but it's just like a mushroom. Yes, it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's It's the black, not the white. Now the white, the white truffles. Why are they so expensive? A tooth, a tooth, a tooth, a tooth, a tooth, a tooth, because you can't find them, because they live six feet under the ground, because you need dogs to get them, because they're grown in pigs.

They need pigs. They need pigs. They're the craziest delicacy of all time. Now you gotta get wine, and I'm looking at the wine, and the wine is so expensive that I'm like, I can't spend this for food, and then I'm not a billionaire. I don't have this kind of money. So I call the so-mel-yee over the expert, and you know what I said to him? I can't spend this for food and then I'm not a billionaire. I don't have this kind of money. Right.

So I call the so-melier over the expert. And you know what I said to him? I just went like this. I go, they're not used to hearing this. I go, bro, listen to me. I'm not news, I said, I said, all these wine, all this wine, all these prices, they're taking all the energy out of my body. Yeah.

I don't have any energy out of my body. I'm getting married to that. I have no energy. And I'm getting married. And I went like that. I was always my head. And you know, you're ruining my wedding. No, he did. He goes like this.

He goes kind of wanting you like, I go, I like over one. He goes, okay. I go with some age on it. He goes, I got you. I got you. He goes, close that up. Don't look at that. I got you.

And that's all he did. And he just disappeared. So now, now they're bringing out crazy ones that are pairing with it. And they're showing me the bottle. I'm like, well, I know how much that costs. And that's just with the truffles. Oh, and and and and Kayla comes out and goes, let me try this. He comes out in a chat. It's a chest. It's a treasure chest with six people. We keep the trouble getting married. Let me help you out. Pulls it open. Pulls out the

fucking truffle. It goes, it's an apple size one. I never seen one that big. went oh my girl my girl goes you have to calm down. You're actually I have to calm down Does it take a mushroom? You're not ready Josh questions. He's not right. Why trouble season now. I feel like taking you to V. I've entered to tonight I don't tell me it's white truffle season. Yeah, we got shaved the trouble wait, but what did you put the dirty bottle? You're not just gonna risotto risotto. You can put it on scallops. You can put anything Oh, man, blah blah blah. I got to take it if you have that until right now They have a they have a scallop dish with a cheese fondue get the fuck out of here

So now hold on at your wedding truffle and wine my wedding Not putting into keel, but so now Boba we're talking I'm I'm not that bad. I'm literally I'm already an asshole I'm waiting for my business managers to call me and be like hey fuck face You're not a land barren and you're spending too much money because I spend I don't have any money. Yeah, I don't so He goes I used that money. I don't have money and I don't know the money to go to fucking French laundry. I'm just being honest. So I'm like calculating how much this is gonna But I can't understand why they'm just being honest. So I'm like calculating how much this is going to spend. I can't understand why they're bringing this guy, I'm like,

this guy likes me, this guy fucking likes me. He dags me. So now that the bill is going to come, and I'm ready. I mean, you're paying for all four. Oh, yeah. Now I'm expecting a bill for, I don't know, 20, three grand, 3,500, I don't know. Let her to feel and I open the bill up and there I see a card the bill up and I see a card. Seven grand. I see a card. All it says is congratulations. We love you.

Love Joey and Karin. And I go. Who's Joey and Karin? Yeah, that's my next question. I go, my friend, Joe, heard me. I mentioned I was going to French laundry in passing. The New York, he lives in London a week ago, a week before this motherfucker called French laundry

and goes, get him whatever they want and make sure you wind him up. Hey, waiter, tell us up before we were going to show him that we were all laughing. The waiter came out and he was, yeah, when you told me that the wine was taken away because we had everything planned out. I go, you motherfuckers knew they go, yeah, of course we knew.

Dude, put the bottle down. Dude, I bring that stupid pig over here. I'm gonna buy it. Bring it all over. That's why, and Tom's color gave us a tour of the kitchen. Like for me, food, that kind of food to me is like, if I had the the money I'd eat there every day It's like it's art. It's fucking art. Yeah, what was your main course there though?

Well, but you take small you have small dishes that'll knock your cup I'll be so hungry. It's an exploit. No, you eat to honor But they come out and they go you want more food. We're like, hello. You know, it's like it's it's So much food, but it is a tasting menu. You don't order. You just go, I want the tasting menu. Do you want the new one?

You want the traditional tasting menu? Traditional. Yeah. Do you want just vegetables? Do you want just vegetables? No, no. You think no, and then you try to eat it. No, no, no, no, no, no, my God. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, white quail, Baba. You want a certain kind of lamb.

Well, I know, you want yellow tail, that's me. You want all that. I ate all that. What'd you have? All of that? All that. I didn't know there was something called a white quail, but there is.

But it's the way it's prepared and where it's put in a dish. I don't know, caviar and scallops with a cheese thing. You're like, what the fuck? And mostly quail eat is black quail. Also known as a pigeon. Yeah, yeah, I don't know that I've had my right quail. I had wood pigeon in France. What the fuck is wood pigeon?

I don't know, but it's a pigeon that lives in the wild. How do you pigeon? I ate it, it's fucking head. I ate it. You ate it's head? They give you the head. I ate the head. My vision could be the pigeon's head. You ain't his head. They give you the head. I hate the head. You need to take the pigeons head to and they cover your face. They cover you with a

napkin. They block the other diners with a napkin. And then you eat the head and you go, very very dumb. He is doing this. They're eating a fucking surgeon head. Yes, the waiter comes over and holds it out like that. So the other desk can't see the power is. And then the guy, so my, my, my girl was like, I'm not even a fucking, I'm not even a pigeon head,

but I'll eat everything. I'll eat everything. What's the grossest thing you've ever eaten? Probably a pigeon head. I ate a live cockroach. That's, I could never do that. I don't know what's worse. The pigeon head or the cockroach?

Cockroach. Live is tough. I actually, I think the pigeon has grown. I respect the cockroach more. Iroach. Live is tough. I actually think the pigeon has got a cockroach more. I did it on live TV for, actually it, it, well come up eating cockroaches. It was me and Michelle Beetle. Well, that's not it. That's me getting a leech on my asshole. Oh, no.

Yeah. Have you ever done the leeches thing, Brian? I've had leeches all over my body because I was in, I was in, I would, I would do in Indonesia and I was in the rain forest and you'd have to pull the leeches off your, they would normally be on your legs, they'd find a way on your neck. My sister, my sister was so freaked out, but I didn't give a fuck, I just let her meet me. And this is, I see, me and Michelle Beatle eaten. Is that a, is that a Madagascar cockroach or something? Yes, is it a hissing one? Now, do the guy in the middle eat most of the roaches?

The guy in the middle was the, he was the roach farmer, the people on the end. That's guy who sits next to me on Southwest. The people on the end. This was, I was doing a naked and afraid after show. So my deal was I was going to eat whatever they had to eat on the show. Oh yeah, they do that. You do that. So that's a Madagascar hissing and contraption. So my deal was I was gonna eat whatever they had to eat on the show So that's it that's a matter of guys car hissing out right we cheers it. I watch the episode I guess they don't bite you the guys

What's it taste like it tastes? Michelle beato's good. She's like paid for this. No, she wasn't getting paid. Yeah, it's like in Michelle beato she's she's she's on radio, she's on podcast. She was great. She's the best. She was great. She's left. Yes, man.

She was one of the best personalities. And she's doing her own thing now. She's so fucking good. She's so good. But I called her, I go, hey, you want to come eat it. Some live bugs with me. So before the show, the guy, this was my option. Because it was a naked and afraid.

And when we were pitching ideas on how to make sure we were interesting, I was my option because it was a naked and afraid and when we were pitching like ideas on how to make so interesting, I was like, you know, they eat weird things on every show. So I'll eat, when they come on the after show, I'll eat some of what they eat just to kind of, you know, and so on this show beforehand, that dude, you saw the big guy in the middle, he was like, here's your three options that you can eat. Cockroach. And he said, the cockroach is the cleanest thing you're gonna eat because it's organically raised, farmed and raised. And I go, yeah, but they shit and piss all of each other, right?

He's like, that's the one bad guy. Oh, maggots, which was a hard pass for me. One small maggot? A handful of maggots. No. Now, I've eaten maggots roasted and they taste like popcorn. Really? Tastes like popcorn.

And the third one was this giant caterpillar, like a light blue, and I go, I think I might eat that. And he goes, you only probably need that. I know that is. I know that is. I know exactly what that is. He said, if you eat it, it's gonna shoot. Yeah.

It's gonna shoot into the back of your throat. You're gonna fuck you. Yeah. So my son had a bearded dragon, and you'd feed them, those fuckers. That's the caterpillars. Yeah, those motherfuckers are disgusting, but those, they're juicy.

Fuckin' they just eat it. I don't, I don't, I don't, I wasn't gonna eat that. But the cockroach, basically it was kinda gross, but what was really gross is it kind of, you remember that gum freshen up, that kind of exploded in your mouth? Yeah. That was the part.

When it kind of popped, it was real gross, but it didn't taste like anything, man. It tasted like... I, listen, I'll still watch old episodes of Fear Factor. I'm like, oh, I crushed all that athletic events. When they do the eating thing, I would lose any fucking whole piece. What, you know when Liverpool came on that liver,

I was trying to be cool kids here, I was literally throwing in. Oh, yeah, the antitestical. It's disgusting. The testicle didn't bother me. It was the liver, that's disgusting. Did you eat the testicle? I had a slither of it.

It tastes like scallop. And it's like, No scallop by the way. What's the idea with raw? I'm sorry for being ignorant. You really were ignorant. Yeah. So the idea behind raw is that the enzymes

and everything are untouched. So it's burning all the raw. It's a good food. So you can digest it better. But you know, so like apparently with raw milk, which I used to always drink, because I thought it was, you know, that within this pasteurized milk, your body kind of pasteurizes it anyway. It breaks it down through heat and metabolizes it in a way where it breaks it down into all the stiffened components anyway. So I don't know. I've had food scientists, guys like Lane Norton, who are like,

oh, so my buddy Andy Galpin, who's a scientist at Caltech, bring up Andy Galpin. He's like, his specialty is nutrition, working with the best athletes, but does primary research. And he goes, I said, well, liver is a superfood. And he goes, who told you that? I said, well, liver is a super food and he goes, who told you that?

I go, no, because of the nutrients. He goes, what nutrients? Well, nutrients, and I was like, no, and I start to go through the nutrients, and he's basically, he's such a smart guy, and he's such a good guy. He looks smart. But he, he fucking, he was so funny.

That's not what he looks like. That's a weird picture. But it was so fucking funny because he goes, yeah, it is nutritious, but so is a lot of other food. Yeah, the same was like a prime rib eye or four? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe, maybe not. Sessions and vitamins.

They push back on the idea of super foods, right? A lot of things. Like, no, it's true that fucking oysters are really, really good for you. It's true that liver is really good for you. It's true, but a oysters are really, really good for you. It's true that liver is really good for you. But a lot of foods are really good for you. And you find those nutrients and a lot of stuff. So in other words, if you never ate liver, but you ate muscle meat, okay, and then you ate

a regular diet, you could just just- The multi vitamin A, you're just as healthy. And even when you go through these things where they really want to see what you're deficient in and stuff like that, the first thing they tell you when they do that crazy blood work panel, stop taking all supplements. We want to see where you are. I just did about that. We want to see where you are.

And then a lot of times they won't have you take certain things. This is like you're fine with it. You might need this. And sometimes if you take, for example, too much iron, it can throw your body. You can't fuck you up if you overdo it. Take no little break, fellas. I'm pretend they're here. You won't believe this.

They're still taking poaps. So listen, today's episode fun. It gives if you overdo it. It's a technical little break, fellas. I'm pretending they're here. You want to believe that they're still taking poaps. So listen, today's episode fun it gives brought you by Athletic Greens. We talk in A.G.1 by Athletic Greens, the category leading super food product brings comprehensive and convenient daily nutrition for everybody. Keeping up with the research,

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You're welcome. I just did one of those for the first time and was blown away. And what the guy said, he was like, he was like, look man, think of your body has a lot of different tanks. And you're gonna fill that tank up. That means you don't need to take that supplement anymore. He says, but what most people do is they take one,

they just go, this is good for me. I stay on it, I stay on it. And it's not doing. Yeah. You're already filled out. So the one thing they all think you should always take is creatine. Creatine? Really?

They get it from meat though. Yeah, but taking supplement and creatine is really good for your brain. I haven't heard that. Yeah, so the one thing that I've, everybody I've talked to really studies this, I'm talking about the scientists, not, you know, the broscience. Everyone says creatine is the one, the most researched supplement. You take it. I do now because you tell me, create your brain creatine and fish oil. Yeah. I take the fish oil. Do you take creatine?

Uh, I used to know that they say it's really good for your brain. Yeah. But if you, I eat enough red meat, it's in the red meat. Yeah, that's all you eat is right. Yes I got to tell you I don't know how you shit like if I just only ate meat I don't know if I would ever shit. No, you do that's why it rogans I get ready man The explosive diarrhea. They just never came. Yeah, I never want to have someone say that to me Get ready man I never want to have someone say that to me. Get ready, man. Sometimes I hear it. I feel better when I eat fish.

You know, I feel the best when I eat fish and I eat vegetables. You know I went, I've done a lot of it. Right now I'm strict keto, just to kind of see I'd never done it before, but I did that 90 days of just beans, greens, nuts, and seeds where I went strict vegan. How'd you feel? Hungry.

Yeah, I don't like that shit. I didn't like it. I need that bit. Not lethargic. Hungry. Alert. My skin never looked better. Put a Hillary Clinton bumper sticker on your car.

I, yeah. I got it in my car. I might put this on. I bought two pantsuits. I, uh, but I feel better now on the keto than I ever had. I had a, I look into that. better now on the keto than I ever have. I had a look in, I had a fucking elk burger today, and blueberries.

Oh, blueberries are. That's nice. So the other things blueberries are fucking amazing for you. They're like, they're as close to a, they're kind of a newtropic, they're really good for your brain. But the one thing that a lot of people find, a lot of these guys who specialize in getting people, getting people's health on track,

in terms of looking at all the markers, is some of their big clients are people who took testosterone without the supervision of a doctor. And what happens is, so what happens is you're dicks don't work after a process. Because they do no post-cycle therapy. And you're fucked, right? What are we talking about?

Because your endocrine is a really delicate. There's certain things you can take to activate your testies or your body's like, all right, you're putting in fake testosterone, so they shut down. Yeah. You've taken clome, it's gonna bring back a lot of that stuff. Yeah, they're just like, it's a real sign.

It's a fucking with your endocrine system, it's yeah, big times. That's why endocrinologists are real. I mean, it's like, it's a really complicated thing. Because a lot of times they'll look at your body and go, let's talk about why, for example, your cholesterol is high. Why is your testosterone low? What is it?

You might be doing shit that is ensuring that to happen. So they try to get you in, they look at all your markers and then get you in the balance where you should be. And then if you're low, they raise your cholesterol. It's going to take you there, but yeah. Yeah, it'll take a while. But it'll last. No, no, no, no, just take a while. But it'll last.

Tell me. No, no, no, no, just taking territory can lead to complications. If you don't, if you're not setting your endocrine system. Are you not, are you not taking territory? No. I don't want them to.

Why wouldn't you? I just have so much energy. I just feel. I'm not to be a dick, but I can fuck every night. You know, your test levels are really high. I just, I mean, you know, I feel good too, man. Like I, I, I'm not to be a dick, but I can fuck every night. You know, your test levels are really high. I just, I mean, you know, I feel good too, man. Like, I'm not against it, but, dude, I feel good.

I'm, I'm, you know, it's funny. When you came and did that episode of the show, I thought I was in better shape than I was. I was get. New time. Yes. And I thought they brought me into you know Don't you keep oh dude so the show that I shot with Jacob my son the one I sent you an episode

But we did a boxing episode all nice. Oh, he came in boxed. He came in was one of the judges It's me and Freddie Pritz. Yeah. Oh, you know if you're not breathing dude. I was fucking Gas and they were one minute round And there were one minute rounds. One minute rounds. One minute rounds. One minute rounds. Forget to breathe. One minute rounds. Yeah, if you haven't done it,

if you haven't done it, you're gonna have to relax. One minute, but. He saw me, remember the first time I boxed? Yeah. I told him that I couldn't breathe, I had to stop. Yeah. I couldn't stop breathing. And he was like, yeah, I was like, shit,

I feel like a fuck. And he goes, dude, you just, you weren't breathing and that kid was really trying to hit you. So I was like, the headset. You know what's funny is that, so I'm boxing with Jacob, my son. And so we're doing like 70%. Bees coaching Jacob, like rip through the body.

He's an old man. A tap-jap rip. I kept going rip through the body, and take him out. And then I kept yelling, I'm like, this fucking kid's not listening. He came back for things. Hey dude, that's my dad. I went y'all I'm like this fucking kids not listen they came back for things Hey, dude, that's my dad. I went okay. I could hear him. I'm not gonna hurt my fucking

We're in the ring coach dude. Yeah, we're in the ring and I can hear him like fucking Mick and Rocky rip through the body like fucking Mick and Rocky rip through the body rip through the body jab jab I wonder the liver on he kept saying yeah hit the liver and finally Jacob's like hey calm the fuck down dude I was like alright I'm not gonna hit my dad yeah he's like actually somebody's actually hitting you back and then you haven't done it dude you're gas. I guess that would quit I don't care if you're a triathlete

I don't know. It's hot in there, too What's the other thing because we had to turn the air off for the film. Are you taking any tea or tea? Not you know I Am not anti no, I'm not anti, but right now like actually I want to see where I'm at I'm dying to see now where my levels are in every way Are you joking? No, that's shit. Doing it all. I wanna see. I bet it's pretty high, just in naturally. Well, yeah, but if it's not, I can't play. Do you take a lot of naps on the road?

No. But I do. I have my whoop and I get very good sleep. What's a whoop? This thing in the band that tells you if you can. I'm not sure if you can. I'm not sure. It's really accurate.

I don't know. I assume so. My sleep is like, really good. Well, my sleep is like really good. Yeah, my sleep is good. I guess. That's in me if I test levels. No, but I mean, I think when I, so here's what I would say.

If I get seven and a half hours of sleep, I don't need a nap and I'm energized all day. And then I crashed about 12. All right. I took like two and a half grams of mushrooms last night. That's a lot of mushrooms. I enjoy it. But it keeps me energized for the next day.

Now, when you take two and a half grams of mushrooms, what time do you start that? This is fascinating. I love psychedelics, but when you take two and a half grams of mushrooms, where, what are you capable of doing? Can you do? I can't tell you.

Oh, I did a two-hour podcast last night on mushrooms. Yep. On, on, on myself. No. Probably there's two nights to go back in forever. Probably, probably. Let's you and I, let's you and I do two grams of mushrooms. I wouldn't do podcast on it. And let's try to do one. Oh, no. I would love to do that with you. You guys should, older guys should do that. The older guys, it's what we'll call that podcast.

The older guys, you guys should grind too much. The older guys, you show the older. I would love to do that with you dude. 100%. What the hell? What the hell? You're using a fuck each other. You do, you do these muskies when you feel like, oh fuck you.

Oh, fuck you. You do, you do these mus? What's that? You're gonna fuck each other. You do. You do these muskies when you feel like, oh fuck you. How about you? Why are you all weird about muskies? I'm not. I just don't want to do it. I want you to do it.

Why would you never do it? And do a shroom. I want you to do muskies. I know you're trying to peer pressure. Why don't you do two grams? I have some. I don't want them. We're gonna have them on you.

I have some delicious muskies, caramel candies in my bag. We're not have a monument. I have some delicious Mushroom caramel candies in my bag. You do. I love candy. Yo, dude Josh do you remember you were less aware of the comic story took too many months to shape? Oh, that dude. I so I Get off stage and he was I'm watching every who's on stage and he can lose Dude, I'm like, what's up? He's all I'm so I took way too many mushrooms And I was like, he's I don't know I go on I don't know what the fact to do. I went Josh. I'm done Get the news for 30 years

I did I did I did it stand up on a tail end of my acid trip. Yeah, I crushed I 40 Dude I crushed it was so much. You know now. Let me say I know I didn't actually shit my pants, but totally so I I told Sammy triple. Am I okay dude? I gotta go to the bathroom real bad because mushroom poops are immediate and Explosive yeah, I can't bring this on stage, just kinda energy. And we go poop, he goes, you go five minutes. So I go in, I poop in that back room,

in the main room, you know, it's frowned upon. It's frowned upon, but there was no, it had that, and so I pull my pants up, I go back out of that. I'll clean to a lady. Okay. So there's a girl, though, from. A day later, I fly from LA to Orlando.

I am getting ready for a show that Thursday night. I decide I'm like, you know what I really like those pants that I wore. I take them out. There is chocolate. Shit. Listen, not on the inside, on the outside of my pants above my asshole. Oh, no Right above my asshole on the outside Below the so here's what have all the shit. Here's what's crazy so terrible Here's what's crazy not only did I do two shows one of the county store one of the laugh at shit on your pants Not only was I around all of you not only was I in four ubers. Nobody nobody You got some shit on your all in our own I also don't I'm not looking for shit on you smell it. You might smell it didn't smell

Yes, shit It was terrible dude, but the fact that I pulled it out and my wife was there and I held it up She was like what is that I'm like I think that's poop. She's like what Why do you have poop on the outside of your pants? I'm like, I think that's poop. She's like, what, why do you have poop on the outside? How do your pants? I'm like, I, because I do mushroom. And there's nothing sexy about poop. There's nothing sexy about poop.

I might get you know, I wear whitey tight. Literally, I don't wear whitey tights. I wear tidy, whitey. But they're not white. I always have dark colors for, you know, I don't want peepee stains and streaks. Yes. My girl is like, oh, you need new underwear.

She bought the white ones. I'm like, I'm telling you, I'm telling you, I'm trying to bepee stains and streaks. My girl is like, oh, you need new underwear. She bought the white ones. I'm telling you, I'm telling you, I'm trying to be cool. Give it sexy. You don't want me wearing the white one. Because why you go, hey, I look like I'm on the spectrum when I wear these. B, it's a disaster. I'm trying to keep it sexy.

Don't you clean your shirt? Yeah, I do, but still, it should help. You gotta lick it. You gotta lick it. You gotta lick it. It just happens. I don't or don't. But it's all I have. I wore the white ones for one day. You gotta lick it. You gotta lick it. You gotta lick it. It just happens. I told her, don't, I, so because all I had, I wore the white ones for one day.

She did the laundry and she's like, oh, I hear her go. Oh my God, like, I fucking told you. There's a reason why I wear camo colored undies, bitch. Yeah, I mean, also, it was a get rid of them. Get rid of them. Throw them away. I told you, you're playing with fire. Throw them away.

Or buy, No, she won't touch them. Or buy 350 pair and I'll wear them and throw them away after I want to do that yeah or any Murphy does that or he wears he has any griffin he should do that with his sneakers yeah he's so white he's so once throws it away he's a German he would also do only if I or force once is then his rider yeah I have to brand new clean beer air force that's called being a dick you, have you ever just considered finding out why your asshole leaks?

I'll take a look. I don't think I need to go to a doctor. I'll take a look. I mean, is it leaking like a steady drip or is it just like, no, it's a lazy wipe. Because he's a lazy wiper. You know what I need? I need a bidet.

Yeah. And one of those new ones that spray up, probably with that is it wants it, you're down there, I chill. If there's a nice bidet. One of those new ones that spray up. Prong with that is, once you're down there, I chill. If there's a nice bidet, some of the hotels have them. I'm there for long. Well, I just grabbed some wipes.

I'm gonna have to try that. Toilet paper is primitive. But the wipes are disgusting. The wipes are great. Yeah. I need water on my shitter and I keep it. Really? Oh, dude, I've a nice restaurants or hotels right

I'll walk in he's in the restaurant on top of the thing going like this that's the water not true you know it's stuck my ass in a sink before you're doing this with the water and I'm like what no your ass is to me which is worse because you're big balls and He's going like this. Do you go in the balls? Oh, I'm massive. Yeah, I have huge balls. It's probably one of my tests. They're so pumped. Really? Yeah.

Big old guy with balls. And it's dick. My dick hangs a lot. Yeah, more than you're, let me ask you how, no way. Your dick's not lower than your balls. My dick is pretty good. His balls are like those big white truffles they brought. Oh, my girl, the other day goes, look at your situation.

I'm like, I know. I'm just, I got a big old lazy dick in balls. Did you like that? It's old lazy dick and balls. Did you like it? You have your work cut out for the heavy old for the rest of your life. Is it top heavy? I got a dick. Brian has a dick on. He knows. I got big balls. He says it was day I was sucked in. Yeah. I got right balls that don't I got no nonsense balls. I told Brian when he was I let me ask you a question. I told Brian, he started only fans and just fucking nut shots.

Nut shots, two questions for you. One, how far in the future are you gonna have to hold your hands and your balls and your hands so you don't poop on them? How far in the future is that? No, we're good there. Okay, it's not hanging that low? I don't think so. Okay, no. No, it's not like an old low I don't think so. Okay. No, it's not like

an old low. It's just like these big grandfather having. It's like it's like a baboon thing. It's so strange because I remember my grandfather saying to me, again, if I was gay, they'd be delicious. What have I? It's weird how they do that. It is, it is like cool. It almost looks painful. Yeah. You know, with liver king, enjoy, like is that the size of nut we're talking about? Well, you know, he had a bowl test go and I thought it was a bowl heart. I don't know. It was a, it was fucking like this. Where do you find it?

It's an ostrich egg. Where do you, but where does he go and buy bowl? You get it. You got it. He said he had a chef, but then this chef has to just drop in the world because you don't have to cook, right? Just cuts, just cut it up. Is he as short as I think he is?

Yes. Five, seven. Because online he's fucking jacked, and don't get around, he's in really good shape and big, but he's not like a massive, you know, he's about five, seven, five, six, five, seven. But in really good shape. Yeah, dude, I mean, look at him.

He, he smells like a tent, but it really could shape yeah, dude. I mean look at him. He he smells like a tent He's got a game he sent But it's not like no I have to tell you He's such a good person but if I looked at him and you were like do you think he smells good? I'd be like no I don't I think that's me or it smells terrible smells wild. Yeah, yeah Like one of them lost boys. There's a scent It smells wild. Yeah. Yeah. Like one of the lost boys. There's a scent of the wild. Yeah. Absolutely.

Not when he's sitting there, but when he, if he hugs, he, you're like, all right, there's a, there's a wild scent. It's the kind of scent a woman who's into primitive men. Yeah, I was rock hard in time. I had to hold time. Hold time. Now, he was a charming dude. So, you were really down there, it's like naturally good person.

Yeah, just a good guy. Dude, silly. Silly. I love why the silly, silly goes. He doesn't think he's's like naturally good person. Dude. I silly. I love why like silly silly goes He doesn't know where it's a character. Yeah, he's aware like it's like everybody else is putting all the stuff on the guy And the guy's like hey listen fuckface. I'm making a little million dollars a year and I and I have a stubborn company And I fly privately and I have a great family Yeah, and I eat raw and I'm just promoting health So yeah, you may have disagreed but what and he's not an extremist and I have a great family and wife. And I eat raw and I'm just promoting health. So you may disagree but what,

and he's not an extremist. He's like, I eat liver, I also eat honey and fruit, and also if I'm out to a good meal, I'll have whiskey. Yeah, he was like, when in Rome, he had whiskey with the eat-drain tiger. If you take him to dinner, he'd be like, what do we up past? So let's do it.

He's not that dude. But it's part of the persona. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it. Like a professional wrestler. He's promoted a healthy lifestyle So people I hate on him. He just said it. Yeah, that's right. He's Hulk Hogan. Yeah, but he's rob all nuts He's also funny. He's also like I had my in this line of his in his line so primal You got a love I'm trying to enjoy it. It was hilarious.

You got to love him. All right, Jim, what do you got? All righty, let's see what's going on here. Jim, you have a trouble. Okay, so here's some breaking news that I was getting taxed from the group in some of it. Out, look at Balox Jones, the settlement came in. Did you own like a billion dollars?

A billion, yeah. I got a voice note from a buddy that we all know. And you own like a billion dollars? A billion, yeah. I got a voice note from a buddy that we all know. And he owns like a billion dollars. Yeah, we're leaders. And can I read you what Chris said to the group chat? What Chris did we say? He goes, Brendan will be like, he has that in his wallet. You know how much money he makes?

He made 14 billion last week. Yeah. Yeah. It's an accurate or not. Were you going to say that, Brent? No one thing I had dinner with Alex Jones, I was telling him, I'm like, dude were you gonna say that? No one I have you know with Alex Jones I was telling I'm like dude. You're fuck you know for 60 million He was like well wait can we get the Alex Jones impression cuz I When you do your out of the Joe's up

Here's the thing bread. He's like yes, it says 60 million dollars He's like the motion can pay in the staten. He's like, yes, it says $60 million. He's like, the motion can pay in the state of Texas five million. I mean, 20 million, I'm suppling it. It's like, okay, yeah, he's still one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, in the first two episodes, I might, what do you want?

But in Connecticut, when they do that, when you owe a billion dollars, the truth is, there's a cap. You only have to pay 10 million of that. Well, that's only in the state of Texas. Yeah, and but Connecticut too has So find out what the limit is so they're gonna say a billion in the headlines like yo yo's a billion dollars Why there's a cap on how much you have to pay out to these families? But so is that just for show then to say the billion is it like why not just say what he's actually gonna have?

I don't know. That's a good question. So the reason they do that is also corndaic Jones So I didn't know that That's a good question. So the reason they do that is because- Now this is also a Cornelius Jones. I didn't know that. How would you do this? Damage, what is the capital? What is the capital? And you'll see in the same thing again. There you go.

So the truth is, he's probably out $20 million or $10 million. A lot of money, by the way. Yeah. A lot of money. But it's not a billion. It says, tech this law could keep him. So go back to him. Because they get to him.

Go back. Go back. Yeah, go back. And right where it says, Texas law could keep him. So go back, because they get to him. Go back. Yeah, go back. And right where it says, so this 1995 Texas law could shield Alex Jones from paying the vast majority of the 50 million defamation case. You see it? Yeah. Yep, click on that.

And Texas jury has a word nearly 50 million judgment in defamation trial against extremist talk show host Alex Jones for all right. Yep the question 27 all right So he could be forced to pay less than 5 million total damage That's also 50 million that's from the 50 million judgment. Yeah. Yeah, now go to Connecticut and forgot a Connecticut I don't think he has to pay ha and so what's the difference? The state is different. How much there's a cap on how much you have to pay? It just seems crazy to me that you would say the billion

if that's not, if it's just for show. Like what the fuck? I bet you it'll tell you in that. I know, probably if I just click on the article. Yeah. Nah, but you're in your NBC Yahoo, they're not gonna give you a real breakdown of it. Cause they wanna make it'll tell you and that I know a part of I just cook on the art. Yeah, nah, but you're in your NBC Yahoo They're not gonna give you a real breakdown of it because they they want to make it look like yeah, it's just Yeah, you don't want to type in Alex Jones

We want the real real chill I'd rather watch that Poen Arrow video It does look so poor. I'll leave this much to you guys. It's like those historians that do primary research and look through all the scrolls in Aramaic and Greek. You're like, I, you can kill me now. Shoot myself in a d***a mop and some dusty f***ing eye-to-limit.

There it is, a 50-state survey of damages caps. What about that? Skies to limit 50-state the limit. Damages caps. Are there limits to punerid damages? It's a kinetic. Oh, I'm not gonna miss. Alabama, two million here. Connecticut.

There's not cap. There's not cap. So, okay, that's gonna be a problem. Now, maybe they went so hard on them because they knew he's paying the cap in Texas. So, Connecticut was like, hold our fucking air. Oh, two separate trials? One in Connecticut and cap in Texas. So Connecticut was like, hold our fucking in. Oh, two separate trials. One in Connecticut. One in Texas.

Just Connecticut's hand hooks were the shooting took place. Right. Yeah, it's not good. Yeah, that one, that one could be tough for him. Yeah, a billion. That's gonna make it that. I don't think, no, I think it's still like 10 million. No, you don't know though, right?

Cause we just looked at it and it says no cap. He was saying, he was saying. No, he doesn't say Connecticut. Yeah, he did. Oh, did he? Yeah. I'm sure his lawyers, I don't know, let's no cat. He was saying. No, he doesn't say Connecticut. Yeah, he did. Oh, did he? Yeah. I'm sure his lawyers, I don't know. Yeah, he didn't seem terribly worried about that.

Really? Yeah. But I mean, I think what's worrying is that you walk around and people hate you. And you know, you don't get away with that behavior. You don't get away with, you know, I was, I remember being so outraged by that. Those children were killed.

Yeah. And those parents are going through the worst nightmare. Anybody has parents, my kids were, I think about that age. When I was a kid. Oh, I can't imagine. Dude, and I can't imagine. Yeah.

And when someone not only says that, but also they're more on followers, people out there who actually start to buy into it and start harassing parents. And don't stop harassing them. And just fucking shit online. So you're going through that and they're coming to your house and they're calling your phone I would show you an actor in a liar. I was sure of that. Yeah, so this is so this is revenge is best served as a dish Best served cold, right?

Like you can I I can understand the anger and the insanity because and I don't dislike Alex Jones I like Alex Jones I think he's been writing a lot of stuff But this is the one and you know, Rogan agrees with us. This is the one. It's like you went too far And I think he realized he didn't realize it. I don't know anybody like well, no, but but he hears a thing like With something like this it's hard for me to go you know, you go He was right on a bunch of things. I can't look past this about it. This one's bad. There's no, I've never been able to look past this. It's fair.

If you're a parent too, I think most parents understand. Right, you gotta do your fucking mind. Yeah, I agree. If somebody shot my kid and then this motherfucker, I would be at his house. Everyone agrees with that. And that's what happened. And so, you know, in a sense, you could say

that's an example of where conspiracy theories are damaging. You have to be careful. Oh, big time. Yeah, big time. You have to be careful with how you speak. And I'm sure he regrets it. Oh, I'm sorry.

And I don't think that Alex Jones is a, I don't know him well. I've only met him a couple of times, but I don't think he's an evil person. I think that he is. Somebody who found either two things. One is he found a great deal of success in painting the world as good guys, bad guys, bad elites who drink a lot of children and everybody else.

He's the best of all time at doing it. And he posts that, and he pits it. The narrative is a biblical narrative, right? I read his book recently, which I'd be angry with. Yeah, but then the other thing is that he may very well look at the world that way and he may be that's a guy who actually believes a lot. But I'll be willing to bet just sit now without Jones. If you brought one of those dads who lost their son, I was like, hey, stop, stop, stop. Just do me a favor. Just talk this guy over coffee for a second.

Yeah. If the dad's open to it. Yeah, I'm saying this is before he went on his rant about this, Andy look. And if you have sat down that dad, there's like, oh, there's no way he's an actor. But here's, you could feel the pain. Yeah. Like those dads and the parents give him the testimonies, two-hours, Jones, I had to turn off and I'm like, I can't watch this. Yeah.

Like you can just, the pain of these parents, you're like parents like oh my it never goes away, Bob. No You know, it's like that's the one that I remember my buddy said that to me Jimmy Burke said I was trying to console somebody who had lost their husband and And he said Brian Sometimes there's something called inconsolable grief and that's what you came across I was like fuck man fuck that's a real thing. There's no coming back. Zero coming back. Come on, if you'll be over.

Yeah, there's zero coming back. What else you got, Jen? All right, I'm hurt. I'm sure you heard last week that Kanye West's Twitter, I guess, multiple social media accounts got closed off. You said I'm about to go DEF CON, six, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I said this stuff.

I'm a bit sleepy tonight. When I wake up, I'm gonna go death-con-three on Jewish people. The funny thing is I actually can't be anti-Semitic because black people are actually Jew. Also, you guys have toyed with me and tried to blackball anyone who ever opposes your agenda. If there's one thing your research celebrity should know by now, it's the one group of people

you don't wanna piss off are the Jew. Let me tell you, my people, it's just not the ones you want to fuck with, but because they run the world. I will tell you this, man, it all has a Jew. I will say it is also more acceptable if that, if you had taken Jews and put in Asians, Blacks, Women, this dude would be in deep shit. But Jews, it just feels like,

I mean, this is the one thing where finally Instagram and Twitter stuff took them off. Okay. Casual anti-Semitism is more accepting. I think that the larger threat is that the Jews make up, look up how many Jews make up 0.02% of the population in the world. If you wanna talk about a true minority,

it's the Jews, but then you can also say this. Let me tell you. Also the most successful, man. Yes, but let me tell you, anti-Semitism is just below the surface everywhere all the time. And it takes one little spark and history proves that over and over. So if the Jews hear that and they don't speak up right away

through experience and galvanize really, you die. You die. You know, they were talking about this guy, I was talking about how the Masad is the most ruthless, they'll do whatever it takes. Well, that's because they're dealing with life and death. They're not dealing with life and death. They're not dealing with life and death. They live in a country. They live in a country where they're surrounded by other countries that

want to wipe them off the face of the earth. All of Europe does too. So the rise in anti-Semitism now. It's crazy. In Hungary, in Bulgaria, in Poland, in everywhere, is never been higher. And yes, we've seen these trends. And what happens, what happens when economies start to tank? What? As economies start to tank, watch what happens in Germany. Germany's in real trouble.

What happens is it becomes very convenient to blame international bankers. You'll hear the words. You'll hear globalists. You'll blame international bankers. You'll hear the words. You'll hear globalists. You'll hear international bankers. That is always code I promise you for Jews. And of course it is. And do they go after them because of the most successful minority? Because they're so good at business.

Well, no, a lot of it is if you look at the leaders of business, so the owners of BlackRock and things like that, the lot of them are Jewish. That's what I'm saying. If you look at the people, the leaders of thought in business and different things like that, especially in finance, the people behind the political machines, these strategists and stuff, a lot of them are Jewish. So entertainment, too, the heads of... Yes.

Highest percentage of geniuses. Journalism, right? Journalism is a lot. Journalism and things like that. So academia, a lot of the leaders have thought in academia And it's never been different so that's why you go after them. Well, you guys are question and and the people at the forefront of social change Historically, so let me give you a stat in this country during the civil rights movement half the white volunteers

Half the white volunteers who marched and got hoses turned on half the white volunteers who marched and got hoses turned on or Jewish and they made up less than less than 0.5% of the population in the United States. And the reason was for that is that the Jews have always been at the forefront of social change always. But there's been a because there's been a level of persecution throughout history. Well, it's not just persecution genocide. Yeah. Yeah. And even God himself in the Old Testament said, I'm done with you fucking people. Get out of here and he scattered them ever. He's fucking literally said, get out of here.

Fucking through the bus. I think he called him heves. So he took the 12th. I think I'm done with you heves. Yes. So he took the 12th of those who and he scattered them in the earth. And he said, I turn my back on you.

Even Moses, he said, Moses, his most faithful follower in the Old Testament, he goes, Hey, you didn't fucking believe in me completely. And you fucking second-guess me. So guess what? I told you to hit that rock once to get water and you hit it twice. You didn't quite believe me completely. So your punishment, even though you've served me, is you don't get to see the promised land. You'll get to see it from a mountain top, but you're gonna die in the desert. Listen man, that's a house of dragons. I have a house of dragons. And you know what God made Moses do to his own brother, Aaron? Some of them. A little. This is unbelievable. He said, take Aaron, who is also, Moses' brother was very faithful to the God of Israel, he said,

don't like him. He didn't like that I had made. He second-guess my choosing you as the leader of the Israelites. God said to Moses, he is rumbling about the fact that I don't favor him over you. I don't like his level of faith. So here's what you're gonna do. Take him, take Aaron and Aaron's son to the top of, I think it's Mount Moab, I believe. And you tall. And no. And in the center, that was it.

I'm just trying to. Yeah. And he goes like this, he goes, he goes, right. He goes. And he said, this is what God said. He goes, take Aaron's clothes off. Take all his clothes off. Up on the top of take Aaron's clothes off, take all his clothes off, up on the top of the mountain where it's freezing,

take his clothes off, give him to his son, and then you and his son leave, and they left him up there to die. And then the Israelites mourn for 40 days, all in the Bible, kids. Wow. So to be one of God's chosen people was not exactly that much fun.

It wouldn't mean a very good person. When I was in South Carolina, it means that God, God may have chosen you as a pro, chosen one, but boy, that's a fucking lot to deal with cause that God, the Israelites was not a very strict. Oh, that very strict God was a pro. He'd be like, hold on. I don't like you guys,

when they said we wanna choose a king, David or Solomon, or the book of Samuel He the guy was like hold on you guys have a king. It's me. I gave you the commandments Yeah, you want a king? Okay cool. You want to you want a king on earth? Oh good. Hey a Syrians Babylonians Persians come on down here Raise the temple and Jerusalem take all the, and bring them back as slaves. Then 50 years later, the Judaism realized,

like, hey, we're fucking sorry, it'd be like, you guys sure? All right, bring them back. That first testament, God was a motherfucker. Yeah, not a motherfucker. I'm forgiving, dude. This book sounds lit. Can I tell you something?

The Old Testament is crazy. When I was in South Carolina, this is how casual. This is how casual some anti-Semitism get. When I was in South Carolina, meet in Greek. Dude walks up to me and we're taking a picture. Armor, armor on me. And as he's smiling for the picture, he was like, you know, I usually don't think you people are that funny.

And I went, I go, you people? And he started to laugh at his friends. He goes, you know, kites with a T. He called me a kite. Kites. Not a kite. A kite. And I was like, say it again. He was like, kite, he called me a Kites. Not a Kike, a Kite. And I was like, say it again. He was like, Kite, I hope that's not offensive.

I go, nah, not offense. You, yeah, we're good. So stupid. By the way, I didn't correct him. No, you're calling Jews Kites in South Carolina? Yeah. I'm not upset by him. Do you know what I mean?

That's what I keep doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have people. I put in my comic to be clear. So my fans light you up. Yeah, I've had people do that. I've had people fat keep doing. Yeah, I have people put in my comment to be true. So my fans light you up. Yeah, I've had people do that. I've had people at my, that, that, that, that, that, yeah, you lose your, you lose your,

Jersey and then I take a picture and he goes, I, I said something like, you want to take a, you want to do a selfie because he goes, no, what am I, a Jew? And he walked away. I was like, am I? Is that our characteristic? Is that, is that a Jew?

Just a dick, just a guy who's just looking at fucking, just wanted to spread bad shit everywhere. But I must've been a fan, because you don't like, you were like the most Jewish person. And you like, he came to the show. Now I've only been, you know what's funny about it?

By the way, you don't look Jewish, is a really nice way of saying, you know this is pretty good. I look more Jewish than you do. I get it all the problem. By the way, you don't look Jewish is a really nice way of saying you know is this pretty good? I look more Jewish than you do I get it all the time I'm gonna use the fuck shop gig because of it. Shob is what yeah because they're talking about and there was some Hall days come up and like what are you doing for what I was like what is it like yeah? You Jewish I was like no, they're all thank you for your time. I was like ah fuck Yeah, you can I convert and come back you can you for your time. I was like, ah, fuck!

Yeah, you, can I convert and come back? You can, we'll take you. I'll do it. Yeah, we'll take you. Are you snipped? You already cut up? Yeah, but the juice, oh yeah. Oh yeah, I'm scared, dude.

It was a hood. You know what I'm saying? You like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like,

you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, like, you like, you like, we were, we were, we were, we were at it, right? Circumcision has gotta be the weirdest thing in the world. That was, that was most as a way of showing God he was subservient. Let me cut my dick. I will cut the poor skin off my cock. I also think it looks better. I did do. But we're also conditioned to that because,

right. If they never cut it. By the way, go ahead and post something about circumcision online. Oh my God. It's, oh is it toxic? Oh my, I had no idea how crazy people get. It is mutilation, that's the mutilation

and all this stuff. Oh, me and my girl, biggest fight we've ever got in. I didn't want to circumcise the kids. How come you didn't, but you're circumcised? Yeah. Okay, but how come you didn't want to circumcise them? Because it's a religious thing. I'm not religious.

It's 100% a religious thing, but then also in society now, it's like You know, she was like well, they're gonna play sports probably, you know So thin the locker room they have the hoods on you know those kids are treated. I'm like yeah, but but it's very interesting I'm 35. Yeah, it's also a very interesting. It's interesting. I heard it feels better. Yeah, it's a weird practice And then the dog her butt feels but the having a hood It's more natural that because the nerve ending fucking that's what people say that have

that's what people say that have the wizard sleep they think at that little bazooka jail turtle yeah chin has it I have it yeah you you I think because I was born in Korea too chin's a hundred percent organic baby

I'm so organic but that's right right that's all that's all that's all that's your raise most of Europe

doesn't circumcise but the doctor was like, because he saw me and I grow fine. He's like, can't talk to you real quick. I'm like, sure. And I, what was his, he goes, dude, do you remember? I'm like, no, that's your argument. He was, well, what we do is give him sugar first time.

And as we give him the sugar, then we cut it. I'm like, oh, he's like, so they don't feel like, what baby told you that? What baby told you that? What baby told you that? I can tell you what, here. Also, what are you talking about? Eat this lollipop. I'm gonna cut your dick.

You tell me if you don't feel like that. Well, I wanna tell him. I wanna tell him. I wanna tell you, you tell him. They numb the skin, but. Yeah, they put a cream on it. But I, but- Well, I went tell the doctor,

you say besides, it's not, hey, I'm gonna give you a fucking starburst. I'm gonna cut your hood off. You tell me if it hurts. But clean it by the same shit. But honestly, it's trauma for the baby. Shower wise, for honestly, for me part of it, I think it's probably just easier.

Let's the clean up all the time. Yeah, pull it, hood back really good, really good. You have to clean your dick anywhere, right? Yeah, but what about that? No, no, I don't take the turtle. I don't know, no, no, you don't do that. You don't do that. Depends on how much skin you get to hand. Yeah, it don't do that. Depends on how much skin you have.

I like how you get too hand. It depends on how much skin you have. Some people have a lot of skin. I don't have that much skin. So literally when I have a hard dick, my girlfriends at the time, they couldn't tell. And they never saw my dick, you know, it's like, fuck, fuck, fuck.

By the way, we got into this. We always get into this. We got it just because we got into this. I know, I know how we got here. But it's literally like just like this. And you just watched because you're not used to you didn't grow up with the hood And I didn't see any kids grow up with me neither so when I'm watching porn on is a hood I'm like For you say recommended train for

It's like who the fuck is doing this Who's not for you? We're gonna say recommended Tran for you. And now it's the hood. It's like, who the fuck is doing this outfit? You know, dude, that could, there should be a porn star. There's a big hood. I don't know what I'm looking for. You did not think I searched Bukaki no hoods. Yeah. You know, the one who's German, right?

And she grew up, she's one of the only women I know who's like, you're from Europe, you grow up. My wife's German and she has the comparison. Growing's really women. I know who's like you're from Europe you grow up my wife's German and She has the comparison growing up with guys raw and circumcised. Oh, yeah, and then coming over here She seems to prefer at least she says I don't even but also the one who would be the kind of girl to criticize Because she wanted to she prefers circumcised me and you've got a circumcised. Yes. Did she say why? I got a deep voice you working with Did she say why? You got a deep voice. You working with a piece? Working with a piece here, yes. A figure two would be. You have to ask around.

I was gonna say, my mom stopped doing, like she, to my little brother, didn't get him circumcised because I've made so much noise during it. So this whole idea, oh my God. You know, she was like, after her juice scream or cry or whatever, I just, that doctor was like, he's good.

We gave him a lollipop. Who's next? He's not dumb. so me and my older brother are circumcised and my younger brother is not because you're poor you're brother she's like you probably got roasted the kid like in the locker room I football see you there's one kid who's on certain sites he worked out the whole time but still let up with then how come you weren't

gonna circumcise you how come you didn't want a circumcise your kids because I realized it's just a religious thing I'm not really trending in the other direction. I don't know. I don't know. You'll fuck trend or not I don't want to hurt my kid it first day in the world Yeah, I can't see my kid get a shot. They start crying. Oh, they can't bring me can I tell you can't bring me Like it was getting like a MRI and they had all this and you scared a gun like we ain't doing it to this day one of the hardest things I ever saw, Jacob Wolf, my son, was probably three years old. And they had to x-ray, maybe two.

They had to x-ray his lungs. Lungs. And an x-ray your lungs, you gotta put the kid in like this, and then you gotta shut him in a glass. They freaked the fuck out. And the guys like, listen man, super uncomfortable, it's going to pinch his skin. That's how tight it's gonna be.

Do you have no, was it pneumonia? He's like, he's gonna cry, he's gonna scream. Yeah. You were going to see him in a way that's gonna be really uncomfortable for you. But no, he's gonna be looking at you. Keep it cool. And dude, and he started screaming,

Dad, Dad, don't let him, Dad, Dad, right? And right away, your instinct is dead. It's like, fuck this. We're down, we're good. But to watch that. I couldn't watch it, don't you? Like when the kids have, like, you go to the doctor, I can't go.

Same tiger he had pneumonia. Yeah. I wanted a double check. And the doctor, like, good chance, we're just gonna put him in the thing, same thing. He started going, daddy, no, I went, no, no, no. Listen, good chance, but we're just gonna put them in the thing, same thing, put them in, he started going, daddy, no, I went, no, no, no, listen, let's go ahead and pretend he has all the time

whatever you need, give me the shit, all right, the medication, we're not doing this. My girl's like, no, I have to do this, I'm like, I'm telling you, I'm gonna have to do that, cause they make my house tell me I'm telling you we're not doing this. And they build the insurance guys,

like it's not happening, they do, yeah, yeah. I was like, let's go ahead and pretend he has pneumonia. pneumonia and you give us the antibiotics and then we're getting the fuck out It if you don't want to give him I have a way to get him. Yeah fuck off. Yeah, this ain't happening. Yep He was like we can't go anymore. That's fine fuck off You're trying to make money off my kid in someone yeah, that's like Hospital's like we'll put him in here. There's a good chance he has pneumonia. I'm like you say good chance Well, there's good chance he has pneumonia, I'm like, you just say good chance you fucking. Yeah.

Yeah. It's not that bad. My son was born out to have x-rays in his lungs because the air, he popped out too quickly so the water didn't come out of his lungs. And I was like, do we have to do this? She was like, you do have to do this. No, we have to.

Certain times, yeah. I was like, all right, what am I fucking now? What else you got, Jen? What else you got? By the way, my dick is thicker because I have extra skin when you pull it back. So it's thicker all your dicks, okay? Wow, I know.

Hey, okay. That more skin. Just wanted to wrap that up. I've seen some thick skin. How thick is your dick skin, holy shit. Like a rhinos. Even if you add like a milling wheel. It's the color.

It's the color. It's the color. It looks like a rhinotail. It's a rhino tail. Yeah. All right. I brought that up because Kim Kardashian, I think this happened probably before he got taken off.

I think, I don't know, he got taken off Instagram. I know he got taken off Twitter. Yeah, he's not been so. Kanye had beef with that guy, Boosie Badass, and posted this message, because I guess Boosie didn't like the whole white lives matter stuff, and then went back and forth. So Kanye posted this.

Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Yeah. Kanye puts, now I'm back to shoot the school up. So look at the whole thing though. So don't speak on me little boozy. Speak to me. Yeah.

Little nerd ass. Me come smack. Come smack me. Come smack me or come shoot me. I'm the one that got bullied by the entire black celebrity community. Now I'm back to shoot the school up. So he's making a, he's not saying,

he's not saying he's, he's not back. And now he's coming back to Hollywood to shoot the school. Yeah, I'm gonna bully the school kid. Obviously. So now, so he's in production. Kim Kardashian is now paying for extra security at their school, the kid's school. Not because she thinks Kanye is gonna do something,

but someone will read this and try to do something. Yeah, he's a massive fan base. But this dude is mentally ill. Dude definitely without a doubt. Well also his grammar, I don't know what he's rambling. He's mentally ill. He's interviewing Tucker Carlson though. I saw that.

Not the same tone as this. Like no. But he's smart. Crazy. I got family going to that same school. So. Yeah. He's mentally ill.

Yeah. Like that, the interview on Tucker Carlson furthered my belief that he's mentally ill. Like that, the interview on Tucker Carlson furthered my belief that he's mentally ill. And just because he sounds eloquent, he's mentally ill. Like you can see when he's off at his meds, this kind of shit dude, this is craziness. You know what I mean? This kind of rally, an all victim shit

and no accountability, like like he's also a billionaire He I think he's I think part of it is like crazy like a fox. He's like watch me trend You know, for sure, but boy like white lives matter and all that pro like it's like interesting Kind of he said something straight on Tucker Carlson. He cuz his dad He didn't have relationship with them growing up his mom Move from Atlanta Chicago and his dad his mom's like didn't have a relationship with them growing up. His mom moved from Atlanta, Chicago, and his dad, his mom's like, don't come here, you never see him again. So he just thought his dad was out of the picture,

but his dad was told, don't come. So he didn't have any communication with the... I'm not talking about buddy's dad. Yeah, really? So then he gets older, reaches out to his dad, looks into his dad, his dad's a really smart guy, and was part of the Black Panther movement, right? And was a big time Black Panther party guy.

And so his dad, he goes, when I wore the White Lives Matter shirt, he was the first person to take something like that. He's a Black Panther. And his dad goes, White Lives Matter, hilarious. And kind of goes, yeah, it was kind of a joke too to be polarizing. I thought it was funny too. Why do you think it was funny? And the dad who's a Black Panther goesos, because of course, white lives matter.

He's like, but it was up in, you know, in such an uproar over this white lives matter shirt. He's just, he's just a pirate man. He just is, he knows how to set fucking things a fire. That one's too far. That, I'm usually, I'm a Kanye fan. That one about the school too far. Yeah, a little bit weird. Especially when you have you have you know those crazy fans and they're stupid enough

Yeah, look at that go. Okay. Well, we're what school. Yeah, you're dealing with on mentally ill people Which you know it's not good. Let's see a woman get gored by a boss all right Oh, by the way, I saw this video. It's kind of crazy. I'll show you the video first Not going to do all dog Yeah, so a buck just came into the garage area and look at this, but I'm where is this Montana Wyoming So Why did the buck fall now the little dogs come try to protect oh? Now she's trying to protect the dogs she gets scored here and

I guess that's her husband guys just she's like, okay Well, let's just okay The fucking antlers that's he's an old dude That's a persistent ass, but lady and the whole other dogs. Hey She's annoying me god get back in the house. Yeah, get a gun and eat that thing But meanwhile, dude try to open the door. I'd be like I'll shoot that I think the dog was ever in danger Well the dog went kind of went under the car. So it's not like the dog. It's also a winner dog, right?

You know this this dude needs to get out of there, but she's annoying and also that she was so I look at that deer that deer. I didn't want ever get it So that dear that dear like it would ever did it Or so why is that? Now the post is so cool Yeah, that way that we are dog. I'd rip him my fucking wet nose off Oh, I just lower my fucking where did where the dear stumble out of he looked like Drunk no, he was's like Come out that jelly roll. Yeah

Yeah, whoa there's something wrong with that deer No, it's slippery because probably come on the grudge grudge floors. They can't get traction. He has hooves on Also, she didn't get gourd also that little dog was fine No, so the hospital she went to the hospital. She had seven punctures. Oh really? Yeah, so it's probably like really not like huge punctures. Oh fuck you up But that the man I love this old dude. I know he's I guess I'll fall down to he's sold my favorite part. Look how many times he pulls the door handle here and he goes would you open this and quit? Yeah, he's like the dog she's annoying. She's so She's annoying me 1. She's a annoying me.

One, two, three, four, four, four, deer. You just get stabbed. I wanted it again. I wanted it to get a portal a little bit more, not in a bad way, but just to shut her up. Like, right in the ass. To be fair, there was a guy who got stabbed at Christelius show and bought merch, went to the bar, and told that to her.

This is true. Meanwhile, this little, he phoned in. He phoned in calling the show and saying, what's up, guy? You know what's interesting is that the vast, vast majority of people who have long COVID and things like chronic fatigue are middle-aged women, white women. Really? I'm not kidding.

They're middle-aged white women and usually middle- and middle-class, upper-class. They get long, oh no, shit. No shit. Right? No shit. Shit. Hey, Brian, can I just ask, what are you implying with that statement? Middle-class and upper-class white women.

Are you telling me, older white women have a ton of energy? They're older white women. If they get in positions of power, it can fuck a lot of stuff up as one of Trots say. Let me just say, do you think this was a long COVID situation? Yes, I do. I was just saying that she was screaming well after the quarantine. And she was screaming over here going, woo!

Woo! Woo! Are you saying that didn't help the situation? I would have been a husband Shut the fuck up The husband was like, hey, what the fuck? Even if you're here, but I think that's the husband? Yeah

Or God You think that guy was married? That's why he was willing to die by deer Then deal with that shit It's also Wyoming, right? I would have thrown myself on that fucking deer's antlers I would have been like, I can't take it I would have just thrown myself on the antlers He kind of gave up on the deer's antlers. I would have been like, I can't take it. I would have just thrown myself on the antlers.

He kind of gave up on the deer's antlers. He went like this, he was all, I think he ran out of energy. He did too, he was so locked to car. Kinda strong old man. Ah, I did, he one armed it. He didn't get that much of that truck out. He was like this.

He was like, and then he went, the thing's pretty strong. I locked the car. He pulled that door into like seven times. He was just like this. He was like, oh fuck, that thing's a little live animal. Get out of the car. He pulled that door into like seven times. He was just like, oh fuck, that thing's a little live animal. Get off the car. Get off my life. Get off my life.

Get out my work. I even didn't make a noise. Well, no, he cares enough to get one hand on the, he was just like, uh, a sideways. Hey, hey, hey about the weiner dog so did she There's no way that they were married He's like that they gotta be it did say it did say husband an article. Hey, do you look she was it young either? It's gonna be me and about 10 how do you well five 55? How do you 53? What else you got Jim? Okay, okay?

Fantastic wait, I want to see the honey badger fight three. Okay, okay, fucking annoying. It's fantastic. Wait, I want to see the honey badger fight three leopards. Okay, we'll do that one next. Honey badger fights three leopards. What? Honey badger bad ass. And I'll fuck around dude. No, they're not.

What? Honey badgers. This sick could matter for like, oh no. What's the metaphor right? Josh, do you know about the famous honey badger videos? Look, that thing's all fucked up right them grab yeah to him grab the honey badger Honey, but it's a minute and fifty sec minute fifty six seconds long. They got him He's in the car. This one gets one

Now it gets free goes after that guy These cheeses like That's a mother in her cubs But she's like I'm not even doing it. I'm just standing here watching bro. My mother's my mom's dumb ass idea I think it's gonna die though. No And leopard will fuck it up hold on oh He got out of that there tough Badgers are tough honey Honey badgers, especially.

Which one, Brian, is the better, I forget. Is it the Jaguar or the Leopard that's the hunter? Well, the Jaguar is the three-time hunter. That's the one, right? That can climb the tree with the Jaguars, what you're gonna do. Jaguars are in the Amazon, they're three-time pounds. And a Jaguar is about two times two,

so you got to wait. Sometimes heavier than our leopard. Leopard and what do we call black egg lovers? Panthers. And they climb trees with like anelopes in their blood. I mean, they're seeing jules. So the leopard's, but jaguars will climb a tree with a fucking human, with a human or a Cayman,

a basically a crocodile. Oh, back to our So check this out this uh this dude with Down syndrome was with Wendy's for about 20 years and was just let go They didn't tell him why I first and his sister said that he doesn't even know he was fired So he thinks he's retiring so they're just throwing Also, hey Wendy's be fucking cool, man. Why are we firing at you? Now to be fair, but if you worked there long enough, clearly knew how the business works,

but I had a kid, he had Down syndrome at one of my first job when I was a janitor at a grocery store, and the kid was a bagger, and he was 40, so, and he just fucked things up, like he would get their bread and then put the cans of soda on top of it. No one wanted to say anything. They'd be like, no, that's fine.

Can I walk it off for you? Like sure. And like, do you over and shit? Eventually they're like, hey dude. Do you remember a show called Life Goes On? Yes, we did. The guy named Korky. My cousin Scott and I were extras on that one day. there was a scene where Corkey had to walk down half of a hallway is set in

high school turn a corner and walk down the other hallway one continuous shot well Corkey had Down syndrome and there was something about hitting the end of the hallway and turning where he couldn't pick up his lines he had the hallway and he had that walk. But as soon as he turned, there was something that there was a disconnect. They couldn't do one shot, right? The AD, he just keeps walking and not messing up his line, walking with. The AD is on the headset.

This is Hollywood. And my cousin and I are standing there and she walks by us and we can hear her on the headset go, Jesus, what is wrong with him today? I'm like, today. So you still wanna tell her? You got excited by a sandwich earlier. Do you know what I mean? Give this dude a break man.

We're gonna do almost two pages of dialogue they wanted him to do. One should do it. No dude, that's a difficult for a list after me. That's a difficult I got my last I can't talk I got my last word. That's what I was a division. No, I'm telling I was a division one at you know Colorado the the he was like I I know you'd worked in the athletic building and he had a twin brother who also had Dan syndrome and he was older and They were gonna let them go

or they're going somewhere else or something. But I was like, oh yeah, he's so nice. He would always rub my ass. He would always like, I'd be sitting there. He'd always rub me. And I thought he rubbed everyone. I was like, oh, he did not rub you guys. They're like, ran my punch charges.

I'm thinking about it. Wait, Brad, the first thing we told the story on the, on air. No, I've told this before I heard, maybe when Bob was on air, he would, he would fill our gatorade up. But we didn't know this, oh, this bred him the first thing to tell the story on the on air. No, I've told this before I've heard maybe when Bob who's on Yeah, you you'd fill our gatorade up but we didn't know this all this while you got fired We found out he'd come in before like at five in one and lick all the cups and then filled up with gatorade There was a guy and then they found him put on our he'd like get our laundry They found him to put in his the laundry into his clothes

There was a huge always rub my ass. I, I worked at a restaurant with this guy. This bus boy was from Mexico with his people were doing his thing. He had been caught up in space, was all caught up. He's a little guy. And my friend comes back, comes there and he goes, and then we get there in the morning and Wes who owned the restaurant is hiding behind the thing

and she goes, we have a problem. I go, what he is, he's leaking the jellies. Yeah. Because all the jellies would be, it'd be the little things you put a little jelly out there. Yeah. And so my friend had to go over and go, and Spanish, like, you can't leak the jellies. She didn't fire. Yeah. No, put this in the guy. Yeah. Yeah. The morning, don't leak all the jellies. He was going, this, why would they cut the kid at fire that corner? They cut the kid. He wasn't he wasn't he got the kid in Delaware. You know, Colorado. They woke up earlier. Watch camera. Something's going on. And he was like, dude, you're talking about a hundred

players on team taking those wax clubs going, stacked them back. And then we get in there and fill it up. How did you know something was up? It makes me never want to eat out ever again in my entire life. It all goes on. I'm not sure. We've all been the beneficiary of some of the saliva. But even when they told someone, even when they told someone,

I was like, all right. All right. But you know, I have AIDS or something. I took Pilates. I know. Super hot girl. Yeah. This is really hot chick.

He's breaking in. She gets naked and she looks the cops guys. You're right. And give her a raise. I mean, it's catering to the test. This is really hot check he's breaking in she gets naked and she looks the cops guys Give her a raise I mean Skater intense Part of the cup. I mean let's be honest is it she want to spit in my mouth That's beyond she needs so many parable You want more? Give a quick oh

Let's talk for the show. We're sorry, we were here to talk about your show. No, no, no, no, I'm very funny. Talk about it. It's a father-son competition show with me and Jacob Wolf. Your boy makes an appearance. And it is on my YouTube channel and on Facebook. It's a, we basically, Jacob and I challenge each other to different things.

We did boxing. We did pole dancing. We did a slam dunk thing. I was slam dunk hilarious. That's slam dunk. That's the premiere tonight. It's funny. Okay.

Yeah, that's tonight. Oh, it's tonight. And so it's the best. Here's the thing. I pitch this show to a bunch of places. And it was just a bunch of execs telling me what it can and can't be, what it wouldn't, it wouldn't be and all this stuff, right?

And so, and so, yeah, this is not up there yet. Yeah. And so, I was like, okay, let's set up a show with the UNI. And let's have us compete with things, and the loser has to do a really embarrassing punishment. And so I would pitch it out to some people and they're like, no, this isn't gonna work, this isn't gonna work.

And I realized, man, like with all my channels, almost two million on YouTube, over two million on Facebook, over a million on TikTok. And that, I just figured out, yo, I'm just leaning into my brand. I gotta stop listening to these execs telling me what they think other people want. I know what the people who watch me want.

100%. Okay, and I know that my channels get more views than their networks. Yeah, correct. So I was like, I'm gonna self-fund this. I put a bunch of dough into it, we shot 10 episodes. It's the best thing I've ever done. That's awesome.

It's the best thing I've ever done. I can't wait, I love the first episode. Yeah, it was funny, it's fast paced. It's the best thing I've ever done. That's awesome. It's the best thing I've ever done. I can't wait. I love the first episode. It's funny, it's fast paced. It's the best. It's also Dolbert J. Jacob. That's cool. But here's why I call it family tussle. Because season two could be your family versus his family.

Yeah. It could be Red Sox fans versus Yankee fans. Yeah. You know what I mean? It could be Bert and his wife first time in the US. Times of US Jews. Exactly. Exactly. Just spitballing. I mean, it could be Bert in his wife first time in the US Jews exactly Exactly, but it's the I don't know if it truly is the best thing I've ever done and I if if I would love it

If you guys go just check it out. It's like I'm so proud. Go check out and then you important We can't wait for us a family tells us premieres tonight on the on the Yeah, Joshua few to and then you're in healing great club in Portland. Yep. Oh, maha Thursday through Saturday, then Omaha, funny bone Omaha. Yep. And then I'm going to Mexico. Ooh, little break. I'm wedding daddy's going to be a new jacket there. That is going to be a bridge port

Connecticut stress factory this weekend. I then I then go to London. I'll be back. I go to the Chicago improv October 27 28 29 Charlotte, North Carolina, Comedy Zone November 10 11 12. I got Addison, which has to be up there the following weekend of November 17 18 19. Yeah, are you spending an extra day in Naples? That looks like a long weekend. It's always a Sunday. It's the only time of year. I do that. Why I just like naples and I don't know why I don't know why the food at Captain Brian's is Yes, it's as goes our boys were as well. I did Virginia our boy Eric and American the other guy down in a post there. Yeah, yeah, still there. Yeah, yeah

the other guy down in a pulse there yeah still there but yeah yeah dude it's fucking unreal that food in Virginia in some main street in a place and he has a feast with the best wine and we just he's the best he's from the and then we fucking hang out until three in the morning I love that dude I'm gonna go down I love him I I love him. I love Roy. Gustava. That's all great. Yeah, they're all great. And I am in San Jose this weekend. We just announced a new tour. It's oh, he thick tore and we have new dates on there as well.

That's funny. Oh, he thick tore. We started San Jose this Thursday Friday Saturday. Salt Lake City is next week. Wise guys October 20 through 22nd. Calgary the Thursday show on the 27th is Dan Nair sold out. So we add a show on Friday. That's the rooftop in Calgary, Canada.

November, heavy Texas. We're in San Antonio, L.O.L., November 3rd through the 5th. Houston, November 10th through the 12th. Down to the woods. You were all over. Keep going. Come on, go on. Road dog and motherfucker.

Big one, Washington, D.C., and Prov. December 15th through the 17th. Just one on sale, right? That's going to sell out. Go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on you man. My man, thank you so much. We're out.