The Fighter & The Kid - Fan Favorite Episode 391 Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: December 21, 2025

Chris D'Elia joins Bryan as today's special guest co-host and slaps him around, also, the guys talk manicured beards, butt fissures, hair transplants, doctor visits, eating butts, grown men rhyming, old people dying their hair black, acting and much more!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The wait is over. Dive into Audubles' most anticipated collection, the best of 2025, featuring top audiobooks, podcasts, and originals across all genres. Our editors have carefully curated this year's must-listen, from brilliant hidden gems to the busiest new releases. Every title in this collection has earned its spot. This is your go-to for the absolute best in 2025 audio entertainment,

Whether you love thrillers, romance, or nonfiction, your next favorite listen awaits. Discover why there's more to imagine when you listen at audible.com slash best of the year. Not many men. Can we stand my punch? Punch. Obviously. Obviously. For sure. Got a set a hair on them. Black belts and chicken heads. I think you'd be surprised. I think you'd be surprised. Abbot Kenny Fight Club. Fight Club.

Mm, kids got a piece on them. Peace on them. A couple one, two cutie pies. I still got it, baby. Lift your shield. And now from the Onet Studios in Pliya, Vista, California, it is the moment you've been waiting for. The fighter and the kid is coming at you live.

No, no, we're not live. That doesn't matter. Sounds better when you see. Live. But we're not live. We don't do live. Shut up, man. And now it's the fighter and the kid.

Live. Not live. This is not live. It's not live. So I got a question for you. It's just a question. No big deal. Can't wait for this.

Are you still doing the way to go podcast? No. You know what, dude? Turn this off right now. Why? And turn on congratulations the podcast. That's what it's called. That's what it's called.

I always confused it. With what? No, I thought way to go. I always confused it whether it's, it's, Is it the yay podcast? No. You know, I always think of it as like, woo-hoo, because it's not. Because it's amazing.

Well, it's not about, well, here's my question. This is, and this is a serious question. So you do, how long have you been doing the podcast? 84 weeks. Okay. So, how do I put this? Okay, here's the question. What?

Why do you do it? Why do I do it? You know why? Do you know why I do it? Why? Because there's an appetite for it. Well, how about that? That's what they would say in the biz.

No. There's an appetite for it. People go like this. What's on the menu today? And they fucking go to my, they order my food. There's also an appetite for Arby's.

All right. You're saying, my shit is like the fucking Arby's McDonald's and what's yours, dude? No, but see, in this podcast, this is not me talking, but let's just say this is the consensus, the scientific consensus of the reviews. I don't know if there's been any scientific.

This podcast is, there are two words that I hear constantly. It's life changed. No, dude. Okay, that's what I hear. No, you don't. No, but that's what, that's when you boil it down, there's a lot of things said. No. But when you boil it down to it's components, it's essential elements, it's that you hear it towards life change.

No, they don't. That's what I hear. No, you know what I hear? For you. No, you know what it is? Change your life. Don't listen to this. Change your life.

You're mixing up the fucking words. That's what you're doing. But for you, like, what are you saying that they don't know? Dude. That's a question. What are you saying that they don't know? By the way, thank God fucking Brendan's not here because he's too big for this room. This fucking little ass room.

Dude. And by the way, I asked for tissues because I need to blow my nose. And they brought me fucking what the dentist used to fucking put around your shit. when you're bleeding and drooling. So that's cool. Clean up, dude. There's so much fucking piss around here. There's a lot of shitty shit.

There's a candles we don't use. There's some letters on the ground. Chin, like chin actually. Get a fucking cleaning service. There's signs on the ground. This place, this place is not.

There's a dead bird down there. Yeah, this place is not. Remember last time? It looks like the hangover. It looks like that movie I was in. No, you weren't in it. You weren't in it. Which one of the three guys were you?

It's not a burn. I do that because I have flames right here. That, can I ask you? So that's what's up. So I go, we've actually never spoken about that terrible. No,

it's not terrible. It's fucking amazing. Okay, but why did you go, did you wake up and you were like, okay, I was a tan of coffee and I'm tired of that. I'm going to get flames on my hand.

You got to keep it moving, dude. There's nothing about you. Nothing. That would signify flames. Are you fucking out of your mind, dude? What about? You know what? You're not.

No, dude, I'm, I'm on fire! That's why, that's why I had to get it, dude. Don't say it like that's why I had to get it, dude. Don't say it like, don't go, I'm on fire! Don't do that. Okay, but I am on fire! That is like a terrible 80s of rock. No.

You're not, and there's nothing about you that's, there's nothing. You are basically low energy all the time. Bull shit. You're human broccoli. that's i'm not kidding no it's fine to be that way but you you are you're pale I'm good for people I'm good for people

you need a nap all the time nah bro I'm killing it what are you doing on the phone now so annoying no don't do that yeah dude don't do that

snap snap viz stop tell him stop no way dude no fire No, don't add that. It's on fire, baby!

This is your theme song? Turn off to spot cows! Turn on congratulations! No. Terrible way to introduce yourself. Stop snapping your fucking fingers. So it doesn't catch fire because I don't want fucking fire to catch to this small studio. So you're putting fire retardant?

You're putting water? I'm going to get water on this side. I'm going to go fucking... Stop it No stop I'm gonna get water on that side You're not that hot I am fucking

Hot No Why did you get But why did you say Let me see that again Okay It's so annoying Chris

Fire, man on fire Like my last special dude You don't get it It has layers dude You got it on your fucking wrist It has fucking layers Oh stop it No stop it

It's got fucking layers Stop No No I don't My podcast rips My podcast rips Dude what does that mean It rips

What do you mean it rips You know when you're going on a roller coaster And it's like That's when you turn on my podcast That's what's how You're like this Oh And then and then once it starts

Dude You're fucking You're go You're oh And then you start going down. Oh my God. Put that fucking bitch-ass bar on, right?

It's just you, huh? It's just you. What did you say about the bar? Put that fucking bar on. Put that bitch-ass bar on. So you don't fall out while you're listening, dude. Okay. So you, I've had people fall.

Your podcast is what people should listen to and they're working out. Yeah. Well, no. Well, I mean, it's very dangerous because I've had people in their car fall out of their car listening on the freeway. Yeah, it's happened. I don't believe that. That's true. I believe that you're lying about that. They fall, they fall out of their car. Do you get recognized when you're driving down the... Oh, dude, you know what the fucking most hilarious shit was? Dude, I was at Starbucks and coffee bean today because I got two coffees for me, because last time I got two coffees

and I gave one to you and your fucking sweet tart, tart, nass wouldn't drink it because you're disrespectful. You use these terms sweet tart tart nass and when I go do my shows, people go, you got a sweet tart tart nash and I don't like it. So don't coin things that people fucking minute because then I got to deal with me going, yeah, I'm a sweet tart tart ass. Young guys are like, you got a sweet tart tartan ass as they drive by me. I don't like it. Well, don't be fucking sweet tart tartan everywhere. There's nothing sweet tart tartan about me at all. I'm a fucking hard, older dude. Yeah. I've seen a lot of shit. Dude, I keep it tight. You know what's so hilarious? I was at fucking Starbucks getting my second coffee today. And the guy goes like this. I can't

even say without laughing. He goes like this. He says, he's going to make me so bad. What's your name? Chris. I'm like, you're going to do it.

All right. You're going to do a joke here? Chris. What? You are not a household name. So don't act like the fucking guy at Starbucks. Definitely knows who you are. He was funny.

He was, I mean. Oh my God. Dude, I laughed. I laughed. And he played it good. He was like, what? And I go like this.

I go like this. I looked at him and I go like this. Chris. Yeah, that's what I did. People, actually, I have family members who go, what's that guy Chris Delia like? No. They do.

So your name is not even known. But that's because they have a listening problem and hearing problem. No. What's that guy Chris Delia like? Dude. And then? What? Some people go, yeah, he's, man.

No, they don't do that. I just heard famous people go. They don't do that, dude. What the fuck, bro? Did you shoot this morning? Yeah. Hey, dude, it's too early. Why, you see some makeup on me?

No, yeah. It's too early to be fucking doing your second job. I agree with that. It's 11. My problem is I don't really like working, and I'm not kidding. Do you? I don't like, like, when you're on a set of a movie. Oh, it's boring as fuck, yeah.

It's boring as fuck. Yeah, especially if you're doing a drama, which I like to do. But like when you're doing a drama, like I did a drama last year that didn't come out yet. But like it, people are like, was it fun? And I'm like, that's the wrong word. For you and me? It's not fun. It's like you're doing drama.

Like first of all, in the movie, the lead was dying of cancer. That's what the story's about. So you're like, you're like sitting there being all the emotional and it's like cut. And you got to do it again. You got to do it nine times. And you're like, you're not having fun in between because it doesn't call for it. And you don't want to fuck up the vibe of the. So you can't play around.

Yeah, so you're just like, chilling and you're like, oh, this person has cancer. You got a pretend a person has cancer. So fun's the wrong word. I mean, and here's the other thing, too. In acting class, they call it keeping your preparation. Oh. Keeping your emotional preparation. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Catch you later. Yeah, catch you later. And so also, so also what, what you, it's just, I forgot, I lost my train of thought. No, you were talking about how boring acting can be on set. You can't play around. It's just, the guy has cancer, so you have to be in that. Yeah. And then you just, it's just tough to be happy and fun when you're just doing that. And you're, oh, here's what I was going to say.

You only have, if I was like the fourth biggest role in the movie, but you, you still, even if you're like the fourth, unless you're like the guy in the movie or the other person in the movie, like the first two, you've got about one or two good scenes that where you're really. doing something. You know how many times you just got to walk in the door and put your keys down? That's a scene. People don't realize that. I wish people could see what acting really is. And how about when they're, they, so when you do coverage, they shoot you and then

they shoot the other person, you have to be behind the camera saying your lines. So so much of it, and you know, whether you're working with like, it doesn't matter how famous the person is. I don't care how big and famous. Sometimes you have to be in the background shot. You have to be in the background. So you're just standing around all day, pretending to

talk yeah it's weird it's so many weird things about like being on set and people and people be like oh it's a weird thing to complain about you make a lot of money like you don't make that much money doing that stuff you really don't maybe one there's one or two people making money yeah right but like you're don't you don't you don't make a lot like these actors that you see in these you don't know their name they're not making a lot of money not only that they're middle class they're living a middle class life i don't care how many times you've seen them in in in l a la in l a oh you mean big air big actors yeah it doesn't matter even bigger actors yeah Yeah, you're not making money.

You're living a very... I mean, it's fine, but it's... And they never know where the next job is. Hey, Ontario. Come on down to BetMGM Casino and check out our newest exclusive. The Price is Right Fortune Pick. Don't miss out. Play exciting casino games based on the iconic game show.

Only at BetMGM. Access to the Price is right Fortune Pick is only available at BetMGM Casino. BetMGM and GameSense remind you to play responsibly. 19 plus to Wager, Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connix Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge.

BenMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. But it's true that unless the one good thing about doing comedy is you can be around funny fucking people so you're laughing. When you're doing a drama, a lot of actors, they're good at that, but they don't have great senses of humor. Yeah. So then you're just kind of there. And you're eating bagels and fucking muffins from craft service and you're just getting

fucking fat. Yeah, I don't get fat. And I don't eat bagels. Yeah, but you... I'm shredded. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, you know what I'm shredded? You lost a lot of weight, though.

I did. Yeah, so what's the deal? Soriasis, so I have to eat no bread and stuff. So you get psoriasis if you eat bread? Yeah, so I have to eat a certain diet. You pop out? You start fucking popping out. I just stay super lean now.

No, is it that or is it just that you... Don't be careful now. What? What? The more and more, when I, and I'm not saying you look a lot like this person. Yeah. But the, every time. I see you. Don't be insulting. I'm not.

I feel like something's going on. It's actually not. I know what you're saying, but it's not. But I feel like you're going to be insulting. I get it. And I know, I would feel that way too. But this is actually not that. I know. I'm a guest. Okay. I'm a guest of the fighter and the kid. Yeah. So don't be a dick. And I'm not. Okay. Um, every time I see you, you look more and more like the cryptkeeper. From. And you don't look a lot like it, but it's more and more. Yeah. You know, you know, the, you know, I told you not to be, fucking, or whatever.

I told you not to be insulted. No, no, no. So why did you say that? Um, you know what he, no, I'm saying, you know when he pops up. Yeah, I, he's a skeleton, look at him. I look like that. The, um, tells him the crypt, crypt, crypt, creeper. He had a good run.

I mean, I'm not, I'm not, like, he was popular. He's popular. I think they're redoing it, so maybe you. Why don't you shave? Why do you let it grow all the way down to your neck? Don't have time. Don't have time. You have nothing but time.

Too busy. You have nothing but time. Dude, if I shit, what am I in fucking in sync? Let me tell you something, dude. If you put any time into your beard, put a vest with a bunch of pockets on it on and take a hike, dude. Take a fucking hike. Get a vest with a bunch of pockets on it. No, come on.

Put it on. Take a hike. Bro. You can't just let your beard grow anywhere. that way bro get a walking stick dude i would never put lines or any sort of care into my beard why because of my cock in the way dude i'm a fucking guy i'm gonna fucking i'm gonna french it up yeah get out of here dude get out of here i'm gonna fucking french i'm gonna fucking french it up dude i'm not sitting in a i i tailor my beard don't mean that doesn't mean i'm french

bitch I mean, it's not true I'm not a French I don't French, I'm not a French man Fuck, I keep breaking in the French now That was sorry Dude, don't play back in black It's going to make me mad

No, what I was going to do is All right This is what I was going to do, dude What? How do I do it? See, the sound effects I mean, just because you tailor your beard I don't, uh-oh

Uh-oh, pussy alert. You're... Uh-oh, you cut your beard? Yeah, I do. I manicure it sometimes. What? You do what? I manicure my beard sometimes.

Uh-oh, pussy alert. Don't... Just shave it and let it go. That's what you do. You can also... There's nothing wrong with bringing it down and keeping a nice line here. Dude?

That is obnoxious. It did, you, what do you do? You, dude, what do you do? You shave your cheeks. I'll pepper your, I'll sew and pepper your. You shave your, you cut your cheeks so they don't go too high. Yeah, I'll pepper your face up, bro. I can't wait to get fuck, dude.

You know what I am? What did you say to me, bro? What did you say to me? What don't you get in the ring with me, bro. Bro. Nah. By the way, you'd serve your beard up real nice for that, wouldn't you? Yeah, I would.

Yeah, I would. Yeah, I would. Yeah, bro. Oh, fucking would. Get the fucking microphone on. I'm fucking standing right here. Dude. Don't trim your beard, man.

You're not going to trim your beard. What would you do if a guy looked at you and goes, for real? And you're on the street. And the guy goes, hey, Crystal Leah, right? Yeah, you're bullshit, because you were doing stand-up and you insulted my girl from the stage. I'm going to kick your fucking ass. What would you say? Lawyer up.

You threaten a lawsuit. I go like this, hold my watch to someone I trust. What? Yep. Hold my watch. Wait, and then you said you would fight? if it happens it happens what are you going to do how what are you going to throw your hands in the air and just go

no dude uh my bro i'm spindly bro my my my my knees my fucking legs well your legs they're spindly so if he can he take you out with a thigh kick you take you out with a thigh turn accept it fucking you know what i mean what you turn and accept it yep turn and accept it and the back of my thigh because it doesn't hurt as much as in the fucking right of my side so you would you would you don't present your IT band, you give him your hamstring. Yeah, man. And then you counter? Oh, yeah.

I, bro, do I counter? Yeah. Yeah. I fucking counter. I'll tell you what I'm going to do. Okay. I'm going to take your brother, who's a smart ass, who sends me texts. Yep. Like, open for me on the road. I'm doing stand-up now. Shit like that. My brother says that? Yeah, yeah. He says shit like that. Sometimes he just sent me a picture of him smiling.

I'm going to smack him around with an open hand for no reason. I'm going to bully him, push him down, push him. I'm pushing him into the bushes. No, dude. Yeah. I'm going to get his knees all scraped up. Dude. And you're going to sit and watch, and all you're going to do is go, don't. No, dude.

Look, don't. I'm not going to do that. Don't. And I'm not going to listen. No. I'm going to shove your brother around, make him cry. And I'm going to get, if he has money in his pockets, I'm going to reach in his pockets, I'm going to pull out the money, and take his keys, and throw his keys somewhere for no reason.

So I'm going to bully him. No, you're not going to do that. And if you ain't going to do Jack. No, dude. Right? That's not true. You're going to do fucking jack. Dude.

And then after I'm done, I'm done imposing my will on Matt. All right. On Matt. Yeah, okay. Delea. Sure. I'm going to come up. I'm going to chest bump you.

No. I'm a nose going to be on your nose. You're going to smell my breath. Okay. And I'm going to go. What? Right? No.

Watch. What? No, you're not. No, you're not. You're going to go. Uh-uh, dude, uh-uh. And you're going to fall in your brother and keep and weep with him. And you guys are going to clutch each other and cry.

And then you know what's going to happen? Then I'm going to fucking peel out in your car. Nope. Then you're going to pop up and you're going to say, until next time. That's what you're going to do. Hey! Because you, Cripkeeper. Hey!

I don't like this ageist humor. I ask Cat, if I'm, I was what you thought is because you're a good looking older, like middle age. There you go. Yeah. There you go. And I'm a young buck. Dude, I am a young.

You know what I realized? No. You know what I realized? I'm young, dude. That's what I realized. No. I'm like, what the fuck? Why?

Do I have Benjamin Button's disease? No, you know. I think I got to a certain point where all of a sudden I started walking backwards, dude. No, because your face, I've decided, is you have, you, you, you, there, you, You indent where your eyes are, so you have an hourglass face, which to me, to me, only to me, I'm not trying to be a dick about it. Okay. But if you look at your face in a vacuum without your personality, you have your personality and good hair. But just the face structure is revolting.

To an extent. No way. You're saying I got a peanut head? In the worst way. And it's a marvel that you get away with it. bro yeah don't lose your hair no i'm gonna i tell you what i can't wait to do a fucking role where i just got to shave this shit off you play peanut no i don't where's peanut where the fuck is peanut there he is and they go like this why are his shoulders so broad because now i get it right

no because now i get it now i get it now there's hair's not there i get the whole package you're taking your shirt off a lot on instagram can't help it can't help it that's all things fucking supplying the man i got a text from it's out of nowhere and it just out of nowhere and it was like it it was literally at like one in the morning and it just said I have a swimmer's body and I go dude and then I just got a picture

of him with a shirt off like hmm like that look at him just keep going I want to see well yeah there

I don't know just keep going I like that Kiki thing that was funny the Kiki thing I did it oh yeah you're dead

there it is there's the beef there he is there's the beef there's the beef there is so happy with you you get a lot of a lot of female tension

on that fucking post bro Chicks, dudes, I don't care, man. Show me love, man. What? I'm not going to fuck them. I'm not going to fuck dudes or chicks. But why would you even, why would you even say, I'm not going to fuck dudes?

Because it's an equal to, I'm a equal. Who is that guy who is your twin? Oh, that guy's a French Canadian comedian. Wow. Yeah, it's so funny. Is his name Chris Dillia? He, his name's Matt, so that's pretty weird because it's my brother's name, but he is very cool. I like him.

Do you ever have fantasies of? not doing anything what do you mean i don't know do you ever get tired like i just shot my special yeah so i don't now i have to i i literally can't think of joke one oh yeah i can't think of a fucking like i haven't even thought about stand-up and i need to get back yeah but i'm like a vessel do you know what i mean where the fucking experience comes into me and then i fucking shoot it out right so i'm like this just happened to me and then all of a sudden i've got eight new minutes i go on stage dang it dang it danga dang it dang it danga dang it danga don't see audience is like oh how do I fucking, did I work out today?

No, the next day, dude, I get a lot of times I get fucking emails. No, no, no, no, a lot of times I get emails from the next day. Yeah. No, and they go like, dude, I thought I, I was like, did I work out yesterday? I was like, oh yeah, I went to the Chris Delia show because my fucking core is fucking solid right now. No, no.

A lot of guys from the UFC. I had a girl tell me, I was talking to this girl who was so dumb, who was in a group and I was at the Soho house and I, and there were these. film people and my friend knew and there's people and there's the most Hollywood story of all time and there was this girl and she was talking like this she kind of was dragging out her words because she's here and she doesn't she's got like between managers right now that's interesting at least she was describing this condition because I've been having medical issues I go what she

goes it's like my this area here is like I feel like I have really bad cramps a lot and then I throw up but I think it's okay I was like well you should go to the doctor for that how long has i been going on it's been going on for a while i was like well of course go to the doctor i don't have insurance right now so i'm just doing a lot of like tees i was like oh oh which by the way the teas are causing the cancer she's getting but i dude do you do you go to the doctor i it takes me so long to go to the doctor me too yeah i know it sucks i had i got i had a sore throat for a while and i it was like two weeks no no no no no no I don't know, but that can be a symptom.

And so I fucking, I finally, and I, and I, for two weeks you had to. So, so what, I think what happened was, but I think what happened was, I had the swollen glands. Yeah. And then when that went away, I got a sore throat. So I don't think it was the same thing. Yeah. But still, I wasn't sure. So I finally went to the doctor, like two weeks.

I was like, all right, I'll just make the appointment. Fuck it. And I did. And I went there, and the doctor goes like this. It's viral. It should be fine in a few days. Do you know what I'm talking about? It's so annoying.

Oh, cool. Here's a hundred bucks. Yeah, yeah. Now, of course, that doesn't make a... Dang. Hey, that's that. But still, man. This story shouldn't be about you making money.

It's not about making money. It's about me losing $100, which doesn't make a fucking... Dude. God damn it. I have... Well, try having psoriasis. I feel bad for people that have diseases that... You have an autoimmune disease.

They're... The fucking dermatologist's... are like, well, yeah, I can put you on this drug where that's so strong you can't get life insurance. Or here's a cream that doesn't work, shrug. They don't know what to do. Yeah. If I was a doctor, this is how much doctors do sometimes.

Yeah, I had the flu and that I got, it broke out like on my legs and stuff. And the, the, so I'll be the dermatologist, okay? I went to school and all that. So start describing how you have psoriasis. Yeah, so I got psoriasis. I got the flu and I broke out of my legs and all that. Yeah. So I don't know what to do.

Yeah, well, that's what happens. That'll happen. I'll say it hasn't gone away for six months. Well, the thing is, is it hasn't gone away for six months. Yeah, yeah, that'll happen. I guess you could try, um, sun and, uh, that's what it is. And I'll give you a steroid cream. Don't you overuse it just once a day?

I guess, huh? I love when doctors say, I guess. This is what a lot of the doctors do a lot of times. If I was a doctor, I want to be a doctor, and then fucking you come in and you say, I've got a pain in my side of it. something go ahead I have a pain in my side I shitted that's my doctor advice really with a D I shitted how about this how about I did have a pain in my side like like on my side and I was like so I go to the doctor and I'm like this doesn't

make sense why would I have a pain why would I have a one pain in my side this doesn't make sense so doctor he does all these tests he goes well your blood your blood work is pretty outstanding liver function's great so he goes I'll send you down the surgeon I said I think I have a hernia so I go to this surgeon he's like this from Cedar Sinai, I've seen it all, he's like 50. I go, I think I have a hernia, and he goes, you do? And I go, yeah, and he goes, where is it again? I go, right here.

And he goes, hmm, that's interesting. I go, why he goes, no, it's kind of fascinating. I go, it is? And he goes, well, it is in the sense that you'd be the only person in history to have a hernia there. Oh, that's hilarious. It's not possible. And then I go, oh, and he goes, now I know your next question is, is that pain something ominous? And I go, that is my next question.

He goes, no, it's not. No, that's not how things will. work. I think what you did is toward the lining on the inside of your stomach, which is what your doctor said, right? I go, yeah. And he goes, okay, so you can get out of my office now. It was so funny. I was like, okay, bye-bye. Sometimes they cop an attitude, though, you know? Yeah. They're like, all right, what do I got to do? I got a fucking, you know, I had a, like a fucking fissure in my butt hole, you know what I mean? Oh, yeah. Yeah, because you don't drink enough water. Well, or you fucking got it. No, that's not it.

Well, dude. That's the rumor. So and the doctor was like I felt like the doctor was like I don't fucking look in your butt Oh God that's such a pain in the ass Yeah Hey how about putting a suppository in your butt though Never done it

What? Really? Yeah why Dude when I was a baby When you do it Let me tell you something man For the people out there That have putting medicine in their butt Why did you have to put a suppository?

Because I had the fucking fissure I mean I was like 22 or something You got a fissure Why would a suppository Help your fissure Because it's a cut in there. Oh, inside. Yeah. So you had to put, uh... Yeah. The, the suppository in there. Wow. Bro, I was so nervous doing it, and then you do it, it feels fucking amazing, dude.

You go like this. You go like this. Ah. Hey. Dude, it's so, you know what it is? Soothing. Okay. I don't know. Yeah, well, you don't know. Well, when you do know, you're going to call me up, dude. I won't know. When you get to be my age, the doctor sticks his finger up your ass. I don't want to do that. And then every time he does, he goes, flat as a pancake. What does that mean? Oh, it's good.

But I don't like that. I don't like when he puts his finger in your rump. So don't you have to do that when you're 40 or something like that? Yeah, you start to have to. I've had, um, have you ever had a girl stick a finger up there? No, no. I don't like that. I'm not crazy.

I had, I mean, I've had girls like ask and want to do it. And I'm like, nah, nah, nah. Yeah, I'm not into ass play. Nah. Nah, neither am I. I don't even like necessarily doing it to a girl. Like, I don't really care. Yeah.

And it's not that like I'm grossed out. I'm just like, who cares? Yeah. Yeah, my friend, one time I said, he was talking about going down. He goes, this and the other thing. And I go, yeah, I'm not into, I like going down and I go, but I'm not into licking her butt. You're saying this? Yeah.

And my buddy goes, what? And I go, well, I'm not going to get in there. He goes, why do you think your tongue is show sharp sticking right up her ass? And I go, oh, and he goes, oh, you're going to get shit on your tongue? be a bitch and he shamed me well and i was like i don't all right but i don't know it's not where i go right away right yeah i mean it depends on dude guys you don't know no it depends on what the oh burn it's not good of a burn but like but um no it depends on what the fucking butthole looks like you know i feel like i need to fucking see what a picture of the girl's family

if i'm gonna fucking eat her butt first and be like all right that's where you come there are girls that you would there are girls that you would there are girls that you're You would. Yeah. But there are girls that are you like, let me see your family. Oh, they look a little bit like darlicks. I'm keeping my tongue away from your butt hole. But if you're, oh, your family's very tethered and look, they have a picture on vacation.

They look like a polo. You know what I mean? And I don't mean to be gross about it, but like, oh, okay, well, your mom and dad are still together and you've got a sister that looks Mormon. You know what I mean? That's all I'm saying. That's the noise you make when you're down there. That's what I do. She's like, will you eat my butt hole?

Can I see photos of your family on vacation? They look like a J. Crew ad on a yacht. On front of Mount Rushmore. That's what I do, dude. But if they're in front of an OTB bedding thing, that's me running away. And then you see papers like this, like a cartoon. You see papers floating down to the ground.

And before they even hit the ground, I'm in my car and I'm going, oh, oh, oh, wow, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So that's me. Have you ever had my, one time I was, there was this guy, knew and he goes, my other guy goes, ah, don't keep him around too close. I go, what do you mean?

I don't like him around. I go, why, I goes, hmm, he's a wife feeder. Wasn't married. I go, what? He goes, he hits girls, dude. What? How do you know? I goes, I know his girlfriend. He takes a hand to her sometimes. Really? Yeah. It was funny, too, because it did change how I looked at him. Well, of course it did. I was like, ah, you hit girls. I'm afraid, sir. So you're a nice guy here, but when closed doors, you might be a bad dude? I've never, I've never met. You know what I mean? Isn't that a deal breaker? If a guy hits a girl, of course it is. What are you talking about? Wait, wait, you hit girls.

Like, what do you mean? You take a hand to him. Like, who are you behind closed doors? You're like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you, I've, nah. How did this guy know this? That guy did it, because he knows his girl? He knew, I knew the guy, like, hey, how you doing?

Yeah, hung around. But he knew him well, and it was just weird. Dude. Stories are so weird sometimes where you go, what the fuck? I don't, well, that's just awful. And, you know, then again, though, the way he tells it, sometimes you don't know, like, what do you, I know the girl, she's not bruised up. What's really going on?

Oh. Is he hitting her under the clothing line? Jesus Christ. Because if you're going to hit a girl. Is this guy you? Are you telling me a story that ends with and that man was me? Yeah. God damn it, dude.

I know. That's not a good way. No. Oh, dude. Oh, man. You guys, it's been great. What happened? Yeah.

Well, I got to go, right? Because it's been 20 minutes. Deal breaker. Dude, I'm the. fucking... Don't say the man. Okay. Why did you choose to wear a shirt with that stupid that you bought like that? I did. I bought it like you.

Why are you into fashion on that? Okay, look. Another hair that fell out. Well, God damn it. You are, your hair and it's okay, but you are losing your fucking hair. Oh, that's funny. Don't. Don't.

Coming from You. Hey, I'm the ocean. glass of water why are you so wet that's a terrible annoying hey i'm a fucking forest fire matches what the fuck are you doing all right i have some hair i'm follically challenged but i had a hair transplant nine years ago and those days are behind me you definitely have more hair than you did yeah that's weird you know it's called a hair transplant. Did it hurt? It didn't take. I had the old fast one where they take a strip out of your

head. You have more hair than you used to. Well, a little bit. Did it hurt? What does it do? What do you do? They take a strip out of your fucking, this is, now they do it follicle by follicle. But back then, in 1963, they take a strip of your hair and under a microscope, they take the follicles out. They literally dig holes in your scalp, dig holes. So they numb you up. Yep. And they put the follicles in the holes. It's such a primitive way to do it. Then it takes about a month to heal. So what were you wearing hats?

You look like fucking Tom Hanks in Philadelphia? Yeah, it all scabbed up. I had 1100 graphs. But they didn't really... My mother was like, I don't think that worked. Oh, the good thing is it probably only cost 20 grand. It costs like 11 grand or something. And I made my dad pay for it because he goes, if you do it as my guinea pig, I'll do it.

Maybe I'll get one. He never did. Oh, really? But he paid for it. Your dad's got... He's bald or? No. He's got some hair.

He doesn't give a shit. If you're that age, who cares? I feel like once you get past 45, who really gives a fuck anyway? Some people do, though. Some people care. Well, I guess if you're an actor, there's nothing worse than a six-year-old guy who dyes his hair black. That, yeah, no, that, because you can, dude, when you have, like, wrinkles and you're, like, older and you're still trying. Yeah, yeah.

Be fucking older. I'm never getting Botox or any of that shit. Just be older. Well, if you're an actor, it's kind of annoying because you've got to die it a little bit sometimes, I guess. Maybe. I never have. I'm getting gray on my cheeks, though. You have a gray beard?

Yeah, I got a gray beard. Hell, yeah. Sometimes I dye my beard with Just for Men because my droves of fans, they tend to, look at this. Look at Bruce Jenner. Right. He used to dye his hair. Yeah, just, you got to be. He's well adjusted.

But you have to be an old guy, though. And look at it, now let's take a minute, take a minute, this guy. Look at this fucking guy. Look at his, he's wearing makeup. That's Roy, that's, Wayne Newton? Wayne Newton. So Wayne Newton has had his eyes and. face tightened and his hair done that's that is that is pathetic looking to me you don't look

good you look he's he's he's that's a terrible look on a man but look at any uh kennie kenny kenny loggins is that by the way no kenny but by the way it doesn't look good even on a girl it doesn't yeah these guys who get they get look at fucking uh tom jones when they get when you get your eyes done guys will get their eyes eyes done. They get their eyes. He just dyes his hair. I mean, Tom Jones looks like he's in a John Favro costume. He should. He looks like he's in John Favon. Hey, I want to be, we're going to for Halloween. I'm going to be John Favro. Who sings the gambler? Kenny Rogers. Kenny Rogers. Bring up Kenny Rogers. He got his, he got his fucking eyes done. I don't get it, man. I think

it looks terrible. Terrible. See, he looked good. He looks good back there. Yeah, he was an older man. He looked great. He was 32 there. Sure it was. Now look, though, he got his eyes done. Look at him. Whoa. Come on, bro. Don't be vain.

Don't be vain as a man. Be fucking old. Yeah. Be an old guy. I'm going to be an old guy. It looks weird, huh? It does. It doesn't look right.

He's trying to be pretty. What are you doing? You tighten in your face? Look at it. Look, there's no wrinkles on his face. It looks awful. I'll do testosterone, get muscular as shit. Dude.

I don't want tight face. Well, but don't do testosterone. I'm doing de testosterone. ball. I'm going to get huge. Why? Because I want to get veined up and massive for once in my life, because I'm, I'm ashamed of my skin. Oh, no, dude. Yeah, I hate myself. You got a, you got a real bad brain. I got a bad brain. But why, um, why do you guys only title your episodes with the number? Why don't you have a name? Because it's, it's raw and it's what you get. Oh, Jesus Christ, and it's, and it's, and it's, and it's pure. And this podcast is,

The truth, you know? Let's go, let's talk about this for a second. Yeah. I, I am the best guess you guys get. That's, not fame-wise. I get, you get more famous people. But when I come on, good doesh. Okay.

When I come on, boom, right? Okay, okay, don't. We're not, we're not on a spacecraft, but it feels like it. You know what, dude, you do fine. It's all good. And don't be a dick. But my fucking, do I get the most hits on your, podcast. I do. I do. Chenney does. I do.

I do. Okay. Don't sing. I mean, maybe if you had fucking Elon, have you had like anybody like Elon Musk? But when it comes to sealisters like me, sea listers like me, you get massive hits. What are you? What level are? I'm an a, I'm a, I'm like a baritone. I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a like a baritone. I'm not a singer. I'm a baritone. Bap-bo-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-d-m. No, but when you join, I don't do duets. I really don't. I do solo performances. No, I don't do it.

See, if you're singing, I go like this. I go like that. But when you stop, I go, mm-hmm, mm-mm. No, see, you sound like a dog. But I sound like a fucking... Woo-oo-oo. Dude, I had a fucking...

Mr. Lee is going to be... 40 and then things are going to dry up. No. Going to dry up. No, they're not. Well, as his hair falls out, so his career goes down. He's not falling out. My dad's got a full of hair.

So did everyone in my family. Hope your dad will do some money because the well is going to run dry. No, no. I mean, yeah, he has some, but also I'll be fine. Dude, hey, but wait, God damn, I forget what I'm going to say. See, that's what happens with us. We get on bits. We get on bits and we keep going and we forget what we're going to say, but we always come back.

Yeah. Or sometimes we just come. What? Oh, no. Dude. How about what do you think of? This is what I want to talk about. I talk about this on my podcast a little bit.

But what do you think of fucking, okay, Eminem came out with an album. You didn't listen to it because you don't do shit like that. But here's the deal. He came out with an album, okay? And it dissed a lot of the, dist. I hate saying diss because I sound super white, but that's what they call it. it. Yeah. Okay, he dissed a lot of the guys that fucking dissed him, right? Oh. And so now he comes out with an album that's like, funk this game, funk that, right? All that shit. And then other rappers,

like this younger rapper that's 28, Machine Gun Kelly, okay, made a whole song dissing Eminem. Now, I have a fucking thing I want to say about this. He grown men rhyming. You're grown men. Okay, but it's still really big and people love it. It's like a soap opera, right? Yeah. What do you think of that? What do you think of grown men who are 46? If they are self-aware enough to realize that it's a good marketing ploy, then I'm a fan.

If they're like, yeah, you go out from the eye, go, if they're for real and a beef. Okay, but put on the, just watch the video here. Go ahead. Play it. Let me see it. Here we go. This is machine gun Kelly. I'm going to watch this shit.

responding to Eminem. Now look at him. Those are tattoos. I mean, he's a cool looking dude. He's a cool looking cat. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no doubt. He walks like he's got some shit going on, you know? Yeah.

He doesn't need a shirt. Hey, somebody glows to clippers. This fucking beard is weird. Talk to my rapper Pam Lee is for security a year. I think my dad's gone crazy. Yeah, hey, you write. Dad's always mad cooped up in the studio yelling at the mic. You sober and bored, huh?

I know. I'm about to be 46 years. What do you think of What do you sound like a bitch bitch, man, I'm gonna handle your shit mad about something I said in 2012 till you six years And a surprise out

Just to come with a disc What do you think of this You're the greatest rapper alive Fucking dweeb all you do is read the dictionary And stay inside Fuck rap god I'm the rap devil Come a bare face with a black shovel

Like the Armageddon When the smoke settle His body next to this instrumental I'm saying I'm sick of them sweatsuits Some corny ass let's talk about it I'm sick of you being rich And you still mad let's talk about it

You know what I like about it? I'm just curious of what you, now not even to big a you're a 52-year-old man, right? I like that he's 51. I like that he's taking something that that probably annoys him. Right. And turning it into probably $5 million. Yeah. And also like a pretty cool, well-written song.

Right, right, right. So in that sense, I don't mind. Right. He's also the young blood. Yeah. Eminem's the old blood. Right. So the young blood is going to use.

usurp the older one. Yeah. In music, all of us as men at my age and Eminem's age, the one thing we will all face is a form of a death. There are teenagers that can beat me up now. There are all kinds of things. You just lose your body breaks down. It's weird, right?

Everything. Even you are artistically, you're not as relevant. You have to stand-ups a little bit different, but you're still not going to be. It can be different. You're still going to be the guy who is, you become sort of the guy who becomes the stalwart, the keeper

you're not going to go out an adventure right and young people like that he's the adventure you know that story about you know with harvester ants you ever hear the story I mean I'm big on harvester ants

and drop them in the middle of nowhere they will slowly they'll take the younger ants and the young ants will go out like a half inch out and explore and then come back and they come back in the middle and the older ants

they throw up in the older ants mouth to show them what's out there and the older ant goes, okay, go back out there again. They'll go out another half inch. So it's the younger ants that actually expand the colony by exploring, and then they finally find a food source, and then they find a nest. But it's the younger ones that do that,

and the older ones stay in the middle, and they stay put. So in that actually, that phenomenon replicates itself all the way through the animal kingdom and among people, too. So young people like that are always pushing the envelope and in a way killing off the old order. So I like that from an anthropological point of view. So anyway, the point is, there's something about him that's very committed, right?

Look at his body. And he's actually good. I don't know rap, but he sounds good. Yeah, he makes good music. I just was curious what you thought about it being a fucking... But if it's real? Now, what did Eminem... Well, okay, so what happened was he, MGK, Machine and Kelly,

tweeted or something about his daughter six years ago. and his daughter was like, you know, at that point, 16. His daughter? No, Eminem's daughter. He tweeted about his daughter. Like, oh, she looks hot or something as a joke, right? I mean, that's what he says was a joke. So Eminem came out with a line or two in his new album,

and he was like, keep my daughter out of your mouth, you know. You know who you are? Stop fucking your piece of shit. Or what the fuck he said in rap terms. Can I hear that? Yeah. Eminem's? Yeah, but it's like in the middle of a song, and I don't know where it is.

All right. But, yeah. Anyway, I mean. It is interesting, though. What is interesting is how talented Eminem is and how good he is. And, you know, arguably, well, I mean, he is one of the best of all time. But, like, how it just, it rap is such a young man's game. And it doesn't matter after a certain point.

Like, like, Jay Z. It's a young man's game. Who, Jay Z is so, who is so, you know, good and still relevant. If he wasn't with Beyonce and they weren't doing their thing together, it would not, be as interesting because he's just rap is a young man's game it's a young man's game but also like I think when people listen to rap young people so for me to listen to rap it's got angst like I appreciate rap right I do actually I'll listen to JZ Naz I listen to Tupac I'll listen to everything because I think he's incredible right and Eminem and then a couple others that people turn me on to right and I and DMX and

just some of the big ones so big he smalls and all that and I really do appreciate the way they're able to create emotional an emotional response from a dude like me who has never lived in it. I really do appreciate it from an artistic standpoint. But there's also a thing about rap

that is a young man's game and that when you're driving it makes you feel like a badass or it makes you feel charged. It doesn't as an older guy. It's not relevant anymore. I'm not a... Yeah, I'm a badass.

You're not driving around the game. I'm a badass as you are. So I can appreciate it from an artistic point of view from the outside end. When you're young, it gets you fired up, you're getting ready, you're going out, you just want noise, whatever it does, whatever that thing does, it's full of possibilities, you're thinking about your future, all that shit. So when you're older and you're singing about shit, and by the way, the biggest enemy to an artist might be, especially a rapper, might be millions of dollars. Yeah, no, that's the truth because it's like, what are you angry about anymore?

An assistant and staff and where everything is free, including all the cars. or houses. That is, that's, you know, a problem. That's why great art always comes from the fucking most broken down cities and areas because you don't, you know, you don't have shit. And you're desperate to say something. Yeah. And you got to say. And another huge thing about being artistic is like the terrifying notion that you won't be heard or you won't make it or you won't have anything to say. And so when the first time you make someone laugh as a comic or the first time you realize that you might be talented or you can do this, holy

fuck. Yeah. And I think it's really important as comics to keep that. The one thing about comedy that I think keeps you on us is we have to keep reinventing ourselves. So I shoot my special. I got to come up with a whole bag of tricks. Yeah. Right? And music, you can sing the same songs. The Rolling Stones are still singing. Start

me up. We can't do that. I know. I know. But you you... Which is why I'm still like in the comedy world from what you again if you were to boil it down which I do every day right so when you boil it down when they talk about me

that's why I'm the answer you know no I wouldn't say you're the answer well a lot of people are the best which I think is stupid because I'm the answer I'm the cure I'm the cure too okay right but when you go after me it's tough don't it's tough I'm glad you brought this up on it's tough and I don't

say share it like this but it's tough we did we did the charity yeah I followed you and I no no no no you had a rough eight minutes and then you fucking kind of assembled something at the end though and then at the end you go like until next time no no no no you should do that should be your new

catchphrase that's a bullshit thing to say I got up and it was as though I took out you know what a street sweeper is I do know what a street sweeper is but no but you don't when it comes to guns you know what a street sweeper is it's it's a guns it's a gun that shoots shotgun like shells almost automatically so you can just cover a whole street

there's a street sweeper where see that drum see the drum okay don't say it like that drum there it is okay right there that's now if you're in in any area any area you will see you later yeah okay because you're all going down now that's why I did the equivalent of taking that on stage

and putting it in your mouth and pulling the trigger that's what you did that's what you did no I I went And it was almost as though nobody had to see comedy anymore. No, dude. You don't do, what do you, you don't do well, right? Like on the road? You don't do well.

Chris? What? Chris? Whoa. Dude. Is your special coming out on C-Soh? No. Oh, is that around anymore?

It's being shopped as we speak. Cool, cool. Now, we'll see what happens. So you're out there going door to door? No, no. Selling nice. No, I'm not. Yeah, let me tell you why you like this special.

Look, you go into a fucking room. Let me tell you why this special. A lot of guys in comedy, they ain't doing what I'm doing. Now, let me tell you what I'm doing. That's not. First of all, somebody else is selling the special asshole. Yeah, right, dude. You go in with a fucking, with a new.

Uzy hat, and you're just like, I want to talk to you guys about comedy. Now, a guy in my age, why am I still doing comedy? When I'm not a household name, well, I'll tell you why. First of all, you need what's new. And, you know, I may not be what's new, but I'm faking it. And I'm faking it with the best of them. No. Let me just slide you a sample here of what I do.

You play them a clip in a half, and then they go like this, hmm, and you go like this. Now, let's talk some numbers, and they go like this. Get the fuck out of here. Oh, they don't. They don't. That's not, you're being disrespectful. because I think what's going to happen is they're going to go, what the fuck?

Yeah. How long will it take, how long will it take to clear our whole schedule out? No, no, no, no. Yeah. Dude, you're. They go, well, we got DeLeo. We got, oh, it's up there.

No, we don't have Deli. No, dude. That's right, because I'm too busy, and I can't be doing it. Okay, so when you take a bad case to the clap and you take antibiotics. Well, I don't do that. And that clap dies. I don't get that. It gets.

it gets splashed out of there, there's a wasteland and we call it peace, right? We create a wasteland, we create a wasteland and call it peace after the vultures are done with the box. Okay, man. When I, now that my special is on the market. There's not a lot of room for you. No, dude. Hey, dude, I'm, what's the name of your special? What's the last one you did?

Man on fire. And then I got a new one coming out called Non-Stop. Non-stop Dude Non- That's right bro Stop Here it comes

Here it comes January I'm gonna call I'm gonna call your Why don't you call your special Nah No Dude

That's what the You're getting that Confus With what the people are gonna say to you When you try to shop it to their networks Boom I get you good bro I get you

Good Dude How long has it been Since we've been talking By the way How long we've been doing Just about an hour Oh dude

that shit flew by thank you very much chris you're welcome dude let's shake your hand you've been what kind of workout i know you've been obsessing over working out because you know that's what i do when i get something i got to do it all the time you do bench and you do pull downs no dude i fucking first of all do any functional fitness well that's bullshit i go on hikes first of all i do a lot of fucking and i climb bro you have a hiking body the first thing i say is that guy the fuck dude i fucking climb dude i climb i you got to use your fucking hands on these motherfuckers, man. In Griffith Park?

No, dude. And here's the other thing, too. I do sprints at the gym. Let me tell you something. I am the biggest asshole at the gym. I am working out so hard. I'm drenched and nobody else's. No, you're drenched doing what?

Sprints. Do you have a trainer? You don't know how to do anything. I do, dude. I had a trainer, and now I know how to do it. So I fucking, you know. All right. And I go fucking.

Prince, I do. What'd you do? What was the last time you worked out? Well, yes, you know what I did yesterday? What? You know what I did yesterday? What'd you do? This is how much of a fucking crazy motherfucker I am. What'd you do on Labor Day? I was at a fucking coffee shop. Yeah. And I fucking ran home. I did. In your...

In my fucking outfit. dude i ran home how far was it well it was like two miles you know ran home now when you say in the hills don't you mean you plotted no i ran dude i jogged okay i jogged you plotted no i jog you look when you were running it was up hill it was this hot is this steep were your wrists pinned at your ribs and were you looking up with your chest arched no dude that's how you run i was down and i was going like this i don't think your hands were out and making nice you know it was hard you know it was too, and people kept stopping in cars and being like, you're hilarious. Nope. I think what you were doing

is you had your arms, because you're not athletic. I'm very athletic. Not an athlete. Well, I'm very athletic. So you, you, you arch your back like a chiquita banana. Hey! How about that, man? You just hit me? Yeah. A fucking disrespect to you.

I'm going to let that one go. Onion pie. I'm going to let that one go. Now, I'm going to let that. You came real close to my face. I'm going to let that go, and I'm going to describe how you're running, bro. You had your wrist pin. Fuck off.

Smacked you. Do it one more fucking time. And then what? I'm coming at you. You run with your body, and you have your wrist. Dude. Try to correct. Fuck, I can't.

Yeah, you can't get by. I told you I'm spindly. I'm spindly, dude. How are you? So spindly. I know you can't Ah fuck

Stop it Can't reach bro My new shirt Your new shirt Your cash is clay New shirt Your fucking fighter That's so disrespectful that you smack my face a bunch of times

I could literally see you for assault Well Would make a fucking Damn This has been a terrible podcast. Go to fucking current offense right now. I've been the fucking...

You just use... Don't ever wrap me with your knuckles. I had the best podcast here. Thanks, guys. We did it. What's up, man? I'm Jack? When was the last time... Have you ever been in the sun?

Dude, I go... You must have no vitamin D in your body. No, dude, I just... My skin is honestly too strong. It goes like this. We don't need it. Do you know what I think? What?

And this, you know what makes me sad? What? And it makes me sad. What? I think you're going to die before you're 40. Bro. Yeah. That's in two years.

I know. You mean of old age? Yeah. Your body's going to go, I can't. Nah, bro. That's not cool. And I'm going to be sad. But I'm going to tell jokes at your funeral because that's what you'd want.

God damn it, I would. I feel bad about Chris, but he would want to turn this into a comedy. Oh, you know what? I don't even want to have a funeral. You know what I want when I die? I want them to just leave me wherever I am. I had some fucking coffee being just like this. Until you just mummify?

Yep. And they go like this. And my warm iced Americana's not iced anymore. It's just warm. They do that. They do embalming. I saw that, dude. They do embalming's where you're sitting and doing your favorite thing.

That's very weird. I saw that. Hey, don't have that be happening. But also, current event in it. Come on, baby. Let's do it. What are we doing? The first one is Colin Kaepernick's.

New deal with Nike. Oh, I want to see this. It's causing a backlash. It's just like a post he did. It says, believe in something, even if it means sacrificing everything. Everything has a backlash. You could fucking piss in a, in a, in a, yeah, I mean, I think it's been, this is America. What's great about this country is you have two different sides, three different sides,

and we are able to be, we're able to voice our opinion, but not pick up guns and shoot each other. That's a huge difference. Yeah. So their backlash is burning Nike. gear, socks. It's good for Nike. It's good for everybody.

And their shares fell 2%. That's fine. Yeah, but that's for the time. They also generated some crazy amount of money as well. Is it 43 million dollars worth of exposure? Yeah. So evens out, I guess. It's, uh, if your stock falls because you're doing that, it's probably a good

thing. I mean, yeah, you know, come back up. Nike's not going to go away because of gone. You know business. You know business, right? Don't, when I'm, when I'm making a statement, I don't need you in the background. fucking, you know,

undermining me with your stupid mumbling. Whatever. Dude, the thing about Kaepernick is get your fucking A and your E in the right place on your last name. The fucking shit? Well, it's probably something like a Dutch name. Probably, dude, but let's get, let's figure it out.

Americans are so nationalistic, so when you diss the flag, you know, people get mad. But I don't think he was dissing the flag. I think he was just kneeling and saying, hey. Here's the bottom line. You're supposed to protest when you're not supposed to protest.

That's it. There's no such thing as a protest when you're supposed to. You're allowed to do what he did. But he has paid consequences for it. Well, he's also probably richer now because of it. Yeah. So. Yeah.

But is he playing football? No. Not now. He's not on a team. But he's suing the NFL because he thinks that top people have conspired against him and talked about not hiring him. So he's suing the NFL. It took guts to do what he did.

I'll tell you that much. so yeah it definitely did anyway everybody has their way of protesting right like you know like you're personally I stand the flag because you know that's how I feel

you're not an American I am an American and you're not somebody who should ever represent America and frankly I think you should move to another country what kind of country oh my God

sorry dude you got boring man right so what are we're going to do about that. But your hair is protesting, right? What does that mean? This is LSD. Chris, don't take LSD on my show. Can't wait, dude. Oh, God. I'm going to be fucking foolish. Hurry up before

he starts the trip. Here we go. All right, the other one is a big story for some reason. This Cosby show actor, Jeffrey Owens. He was just caught in a Trader Joe's working out of Trader Joe's and it made it to Fox News. Yeah, so it made it to Fox News. And they're just pointing out that some fans saw this guy. I recognize him, and they made a story out of it.

How do you see that? This whole thing is idiotic. I don't, who cares? He was on a show 78 years ago. By the way, it was a hit. He was on it. So few people are on a hit. Who gives a fuck?

He's got another job now. I don't even get it. People are, were they saying, oh, too bad or what? No, the backlash was people getting pissed off that this was a story. Well, I understand that, but it was like, but I don't, but like, were they, was Fox News saying, something shitty about him? No, that's another thing. Yeah, the back from what?

They were like, oh, yeah, somebody saw him do this. He's working an honest day. But were, were they making fun of him? I hope not. I don't think they were. They were just surprised to see him. Yeah, that's kind of all it was. I mean, I think that when you make it as an actor,

you think that your life is going to be one of fame and money, and then that doesn't work out for everybody. So he's doing what he's got to do, which is working at a good company. And everyone's applauding him for it. So, all the actors, fans, everything. Good for him. And no, but it doesn't seem that.

I didn't understand. I read a bit about it. Can I see that? So, 26 years after one TV job, the guy looks different, differently. And he's earning an honest living. Yeah. I guess I missed the part where people were making fun of him or streaming. Well, I think they, I think taking a picture of him, I think taking a picture of him and in that with a stained shirt, there is that sort of, look what he's doing now shit.

I guess. So. Yeah. It's just weird that this one got sensationalness. I don't think that. I don't think that. And there's Terry Cruz. This fucking business is hard to stay relevant.

Dude, that's everybody. Everybody's in his position that acted. He goes, I swept floors after the NFL. If need be, I'll do it again. Good honest work. There's nothing to be ashamed of Terry Cruz. Of course. And they fucked that, man.

Cat just showed me an article where Tyler Perry is offering him a new job. Nice. So I guess it's good. I mean, yeah, sure. It's great. Good, man. Good. he's good all right there is something there is something noble about a modest like day's work like

that like you can see him like his shirt stained and he looks like he's been working hard all day and and he's kind of caught by surprise somebody's taking a picture of him but he's in the middle of something there's something dignified about that which i think is interesting it's fucking he's doing what he's got to do yeah you're judging the shit out of me yeah because you're a racist what i don't think that black people should even be working what heard you say that there I said it out loud. You know, but, no, it's, yeah. Yeah.

Good for him, man. He also looks like somebody you want to be around. He's a man. He's a man. He's a real man. All right. Anyways, the story was why it was a story in the first place and everyone reacting to it. Right, right. That makes me feel good about America.

It was a slow-knit news day. And it also was Fox News, right? Yeah. So they were probably like, oh, as an actor, he was liberal. Let's put him out there. Yeah. Well, he's blown up more than ever before. Now, yeah.

It's good to go. Wow. All right. Next one, HBO. Did you know they're dropping all those late night sex programs like real sex? I was fucking waiting for that. Like, it's just so, like, who watches that shit? I knew girls who did that stuff and guys in my acting class.

They would be involved in that soft core kind of stuff. But what, like, by the way, I would venture to say, actually, now that I think about it, nothing, and I mean, nothing well if they're talking about real sex and cat house i don't get that shit but like that whole late night skinamax shit yeah nothing's more entertaining period really why period period dude it's okay fucking awesome yeah because what is it first of all real bad acting okay horrible shots horrible lighting yeah gut bustingly hilarious because of that yeah and also they're fucking on it but they're not and they won't show in and out dicks and pussy shots but they'll show

but they'll show tits and then and then there's a story in between yo I watch that shit yeah and but that's not on it I don't know if that's on HBO but that's on Cinnamax but that's first when I was first in LA I had an affair with one of the stars one of those big time girls she was a lot of fun you did that show you did no I kidding. And you know what? No. You headed back. No. Yeah. No.

You headed back. No, I'm not. No. And when you bust it not, you go, until next time. No. No. That's how you bust. No. Let me see another, let me see one, uh, Sin City. Sin City was the one I used to watch as a kid. I remember it. Fuck yeah. I watched it. Yeah. I don't know how Tolerotica looks like it's right at my alley. But a bunch of people you work with it?

Tina Winn. Laura and Hayes Boy, I've got to go back 20 years to know the girl that I was Zane's the jump off Co-ed Confidential course That's incredible Yeah, they're all Cinemax ones

They're great movies Yeah, they're great Passion Co-Fource Of course, girl fox a dolphin All right Wow All right, well there you go It's amazing

It's amazing You want to see one MMA one? What? MMA soft-court? Sorry, bro, hold on Mix martial arts, you fucking foreign bitch. I get it.

There's a picture of George St. Pierre looking smaller. So the rumors are that he would fight the winner of Khabib and Connor, the biggest fight this year. He's less big than he used to be? Yeah. What do you think, Brian? From what he normally looks like. You know. That's him on the left?

On the right. George's the same thing. You don't know George St. Pierre? You don't know George St. Pierre? I know the name. I don't know his face. You know, he's getting older. I don't know what his training is.

I don't know what his training was. I don't know. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, he didn't look like that. I have my thoughts. Oh, that's that guy? Yeah, I have my thoughts on all of that. Wow, he looks completely different.

Yeah. I didn't realize that that was him. That's him. Yeah, he's probably suffering. Or do you think it's, oh, never mind. I'm not even going to go there. But that guy on the left, though, is Brian Callant. No.

That's who's that guy. You took a picture with GASP? You know, when you train, when you, when you, when you, when you, jihitsu and wrestle and you box and you're training like an MMA fighter a lot of times you can actually get skinnier it's not like you put on a lot of muscle it's cardio yeah you're not lifting weights unless you are that's why when you see dudes like who have been training and they get in the ring and they're barrel chest and it's super muscular yeah they're they're doing drugs they're doing steroids but a lot of times like in the ufc with usada when you watch guys now

when they get in the ring it's it's not like you're going to see muscle bound dude It's your body doesn't do that Especially as you get older With George is older So as you get older Putting on muscle is harder He's still a phenomenal athlete And I still would have him

In both those fights Because he's such a genius So I'm You think he would beat the both of them I do He's just a genius Yeah He's a genius

He's much bigger than Connor Well I know that So Connor couldn't handle his wrestling I mean I just I don't know what Connor does with George But I mean again George is But then again

George has been out for a long time I don't know what kind of Well he's got to be what 45 No he's like 30. Oh, what? 39? 38. Oh, wow. He looks older.

That'd be 38. God, those got, how insane are these? 37. What's this guy worth? How much is somebody like that worth? A lot. Really? He was smart with his money. Go to network right there. George St. Peter is a genius at finding out where you're weak. He's such a strategist. He can find out exactly where your holes are and he can be capitalized

he's a very special athlete. He's a 30 million? 30 million. He was in American, too. He was in movies too. Yeah. He's in movies, too. He's a very special. human being, in my opinion. I think George Tim Pierre is an extreme winner. I just love him. And what he was able to do when he fought was

he's one of the greatest of all time. There's nobody, you know, he's just, he's amazing in every way. Would you say on the stand-up version of him? Stand-up comedy version of him? I'm asking. I'm saying no. So no. Oh, come on. You're not. You're a hater. Because I'm your friend and you're worried

that your friend's got a little bit of fucking heat on him. You're who being a hater, so you're just saying that. No, not. I do think you've burned. So I am the George St. Pierre of standup. Your wick is about, your wick is about to be burned out. He's a cute kid. By the way, put him and you in a room.

He takes. He takes all your girls. I mean, they don't even notice the peanut-shaped face. Wow, he's 37? Yeah, he's younger than you. That's what happens as you get older. And he, he vacuums up. Any of the girls.

Oh, he's from Montreal? Moral, yeah. That's not Mulal. Come? Moral. You think he likes my stand-up, bro? Dude, I don't think he knows who you are, but he sure is.

Fuck knows me. He probably knows who you are because of this fucking bitch-ass podcast. Have you had him on here? Nope. Oh, well, I'm sorry. But could, because Brennan's really good friends with him. Okay, well, why hasn't he been on it?

Which means he's good friends with me. Okay. Friends of Brennan, friends of mine. Well, you probably like. I stand up. No. What were you going to say? Oh,

all the current events suck today. I loved them. Look, I'm glad that this is done. How about that? Dude, my fucking, this podcast has killed. I can't wait to see what the fans have said. Thank you very much, everybody. I can't wait to hear what you say.

Where are you going to be, Chris? Where are you going to be doing this? I don't know. Why don't you just unscited? Here's what I want you to do. Don't say unsubscribe to this podcast. And subscribe to the way to go. Podcasts.

And then subscribe to my phone. mine take a video of it on your phone and send it over why'd you why'd you fucking call it congratulations because this is where we are man you get a bunch of congratulations for shit that you do because you fuck up the world fucks up and the world either or not you're good or bad for the world congratulations dude you're impressive you impressively are very good or you impressively fuck the fuck up all right so hey and you know what congratulations to you no dude you're shopping your special around congratulations

all right I'm not they are you're going door to door I got a question for you what door to door Sassman dude how's it feel walking on a pathway

how's it feel taking a shortcut over some guy's lawn that's you bro congratulations now don't this podcast because you learn nothing and uh thank you for tuning in to this podcast we ripped it i'll buy you some lunch buddy yeah you will no don't do the kissing thing man this is the fighter and the kid

we're out