The Fighter & The Kid - Fan Favorite Episode 551 Will Sasso

Episode Date: September 6, 2026

Will Sasso's head joins the show, Brendan gets his panther tattoo, the gang celebrates Chin's birthday and much more on this bonus episode of TFATK!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Not many men. Can withstand my punch? Punch. Obviously. Obviously. For sure. Got a set a hair on them. Black belts and chicken heads. Uh, I think you'd be surprised. I think you'd be surprised. Abbott Kenny Fight Club. Fight Club. Fight Club.

Hmm. Kids got a piece on them. Peace on them. Couple one, two cutie pies. I still got it, baby. Lift your shield. And now from the Honest. studios in Pliar, Vista, California. It is the moment you've been waiting for. The fighter and the kid is coming at you live. No, no, we're not live.

That doesn't matter. Sounds better when you say, live. We're not live. We don't do live, right? And now it's the fighter and the kid. Live. Shut up. This is not live.

This is not live. Carry me free. Wow. It's cool. man. This is gonna be a very weird show. You and who? Me and Jason Collins got so stupid.

Oh man. Chickety China, the Chinese chicken. Are you wearing that shirt because you're panther? Oh, no. I could, though. This got so stupid. What? Yeah, we're gonna.

No, what? Yeah, we're on. We're on, boom. Okay, listen. Listen to me. You went and did it. What? you went and did it

you went and did the old panther now I haven't seen the wings I can just see its nose I can just see its fucking nose I need you say you didn't get the Gaboon Viper like I told you had to go and get the fucking panther

I'm terrified of snakes I'm allergic to cat so pick your poison and you decided just to get a Panther well this this represents I beat Corona been tested twice now it does look super

So those wings are too small to even get that fucking panther off the ground. So now it's got an annoying, shitty wings coming out like yours? You've seen a flying panther? No, I haven't. Then how the fuck would you know? Because this is how I vision my friend is. Aerodynamically, it doesn't make any sense. There's no way unless...

It's a mini panther. Well, he'd have to be just head. Stop doing that to me. No. And by the way, I got news for you. It looks more like a fucking mountain lion. No way. Well, this artwork is so dope.

Panthers. You're so old, it doesn't matter. But it has wings coming out of its, it's like gills. I know. I know, dude. Why did you choose to have a panther with wings? You know why? I'm just, I ride my mountain bike, and I picture myself on that bike as the

the president of the thick boys bike club. I'm going down the mountain. I picture myself as a panther with wings. A panther with. And I fucking go hard, dude. Uh-huh. Do you want in the club? I don't.

You can't. Why? You're too skinny. Hold on. What if I want to be in the fuck? I want to be in the club. So you're keeping me out of the club because I'm not fucking thick enough. Start eating, dude.

No, because you know what? My body type doesn't call for thickness. I'm thin man. Oh, man. I'll start my own company called thin man. Thick for it. Thin boy. Yeah.

Just doesn't have the sign. I feel like it rolls. Thin boy. Hey, who wants to be part of the thin boy club? Let me send And we'll rumble We'll rumble with you thick boys Oh good luck with that dude

Yeah you guys are probably beat us But we're quick and we're fast And we get underneath Chin I'm gonna send you a picture from my boy Chin happy birthday Thank you Brian 42 43 literally 43 today 10 years young man

I wish you I wish you the 10 years I've had Wow Somehow you I would say most of it for sure The majority of it Thank you very much I've had a good life

we've known you for what seven eight years now no about four years close to four years a little old four years right i think it's close to four years carry me spoken i sent you i uh i sent you a picture chin from uh my guy daniel silva when i say when i put out that thick boy email or i'm sorry instagram posting hey i need a tattoo artist anybody down and so many sheep are like no one's going to tattooing these chrono times Good luck, loser. When I say I had every tattoo artist reach out, name one. They all reached out.

This dude, Daniel Silva was like, yo, I'm in the hills. Because you can give somebody a tattoo and be COVID-Sink. Well, it's one-on-one. He's been tested. I've been tested. And you wear a mask. No, we don't wear masks.

We don't wear masks. But no, I do. But he's been tested. I've been tested. So what's the Danish? There's nobody else there. That's his crib in the Hollywood Hills, by the way. Oh, he's not doing well for him.

He's doing well. Oh, he's not 25 one of the top tattoo artists in the world. 25 guy. He's a looker, too. The kid's a looker. If you go to his Instagram page, I mean, dime, he dime. Yeah, he's a good-looking fella and an artist. And one of the best artists, tattoos, all these celebrities.

Did he say, all right, I'll do a panther if you want. He's like, dude, this is sick. And he's how he knows, he's young, he goes, let's run it. And I was like, fucking, let's run it. Yeah. He went, let's run this. Fuck, I want to say that. Yeah, me too. I went, fuck yeah, let's run it, dude. Let's run it.

And I text him back. I text him off tattooing. Dude, thanks for running it. 25 years old. I don't think that's how it's used. 25, one of the top tattoo artists in the nation in the world. Was in San Francisco. He was like, you know what? It was killing up there. He's like any more of a challenge. Came to L.A. bought a house in the hills and a McLaren. Oh, there you go. He's doing very well. Kids killing it. Yeah. He's an artist. Daniel Silva.

Silva. What ethnicity? I would say he's got to be Brazilian? His Papa's Brazilian. There's where he gets to looks. He's a dad. Could you make the argument that Brazilians, on average, are the best-looking people in the world? The guys look like shit. I don't think so.

The guys look like shit? Guys are good-looking dudes. Name one. Hicks and Gracie, who was younger. Cron Gracie, who's young. I mean, these are good-looking people. A lot of guys that are good-looking. A lot of good-looking.

They're pretty good-looking. Yeah. Luke Rockhold. I mean, a lot of young Brazilians. No, but there are a lot of good- South America in general. Yeah. Oh, Columbia,

Oh, Columbia, my man, Brazilian. I'd say the women are the best looking. The guys, I don't know.

I feel like the guys are athletic, though. My friends in Dagestan have something to say. What do you mean? Well, because they're hideous. It was a joke.

Oh, yeah. They're not, they're not hideous. They just, they just, they're just like a guy's guys,

yeah. They're just, none of them are men. Oh, really, they may be a dagistanian model. Right, right. They're just,

yeah, they're just big, kind of thick, well, They're the toughest guy. Yeah, they're the toughest in the world. Yeah. You don't begin to be the toughest in the world and the best look.

Right. You got to even it out. They look a little medieval. Yeah. And they're so hairy. Yeah. And they just, thick.

Thick. Have you ever seen a skinny? No. No. Who's that guy? Yeah, look at this fucking guy. Kamit. Kamit.

Kamit. Zabit. Zabit. Fuck. Zabit. Look at this. Is he another artist or just a guy? He's a skateboarder.

That's Naja Houston, who we've had on the fire the kid before. He's all grown up. I know when we interviewed him, he's tiny. That's crazy. How tall is this to still have a kid? Six one, maybe. Oh, okay, he's taller. God damn.

He's sexy, right? He is fine as fuck. I know. I know. And tall, too. Look at the pictures when he's like in Europe and shit. He is just killing the game. Yeah, look at this.

You model, bro? He's obviously, he looks like a model to me. That is a beautiful man. Proud of him. And he knows how to put it together. He knows, he knows, he's because he's an artist. So he knows, he's got an eye for proportion and color and everything. I mean, you're not going to.

Well, just the, I knew I was in good hands. And he's rich. Yes. And I just knew I was in good hands with the details because I brought him something that, like, I drew and it was my idea. And he was like, dude, you can't because the flow and he was like going over details. And you can't put it there. You have to put it here.

Wow. By the way. So let me ask you this. Go back to the, go back to the couple up there. So that, that tiger, is that what he's drawing? Freehand? How's he doing that? Freehand.

Really? He draws it on his computer, prints it out, puts the ink on your skin, and then goes. Put like the outline on your skin and then goes. And his signature is the colored eyes.

Now, I got chin for his birthday. He's getting a tattoo on his neck, Brian. How do you get that color on the skin? You got to be pretty white to get that. Like my skin wouldn't take to that. Wow. Yeah.

I guess I can get a tattoo now. and get those blue eyes I've always wanted. Yeah, that'd be cool. I'm going to see a tiger blue eyes, whatever. But Chin for his birthday, 43rd, he's always wanted a neck tattoo, so your boy hooked him up. He's going tonight at 6 o'clock. Well, whenever I'm done with this. You're getting your neck tattoo.

You bought him a neck tattoo. Thank you, Brandon. What are you going to get on your neck? It's either going to be a fish or a moon. Okay, now hold on. Yeah. Now, hold on. Brian, now I know you're older, so I know this isn't cool to you.

I just don't like general. Okay, I'm going to be nice. Be nice. Because remember, he's a fisherman. I do love fishing. What kind of fish? You know what's in Chin's heart? Gruberfish.

It's too fat. Okay. So you want to fish. What's in Chin's bones? Trout. Trout, but it doesn't look that great on tattoo. No. It just looks like a fish, doesn't it?

Trout. You know what? My idea was for him? What? Canada. That'd be cool. I like where you had that. Simi's fighting fish.

Now that. I understand. Why? Because it's specific. It's a fighter. It's pretty badass. They're very aggressive. And there are these little fins have them going,

whee-h-h-h-h-h-h. Yep. Okay, but see, now that's a beautiful tattoo. Now that... That's too detailed. Look at the blue one, though. There's a bunch. This one?

Look at that blue one. That's too much on Chin's neck, dude. Probably. We need simple on it. And not colored. But I like Siamese... So that I like, I don't feel like there's any other option but a Siamese fighting fish.

Ready? I'm going to run another one by you. Okay. You know who the most underrated fish is of all time? Hold on. Now, if you had a fish tank as a kid, you'd know this. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I might know this. I refer to him as the janitor. Because he cleans things up.

He cleans the tank. Now, hold on. And he looks very friendly. Okay. He might be a blowfish or he might be a suckerfish. I said suckerfish. Suckerfish. Suckerfish. None of these guys.

A suckerfish. A suckerfish. Yeah, that's it. Now on a bicycle. Oh, no. A sucker fish on a bicycle. Dude, that's sick. I like the one with the little top hat.

That to me, I go with humor, so I like humor. I like the one with the top hat on. That's nice. That's really cute. Although on your neck it might be a problem. The Siamese fight. You could not get a tattoo on your neck because you're 43, but if you must and commit to that, then go with a Siamese fighting fish. What color are you going to choose?

Black, have to be black. Really? Well, I'm rethinking the tattoo now because I thought I was going to be with that crazy awesome artist. But another guy That other guy's I heard is good too He's really legit Yeah

You're not gonna be with the dime piece That's what I was thinking But he's not the dime piece It's not the dime piece Just so you get dime piece 2,000 hour Booked out for two years Wow

The only reason I got is because he had a cancellation Wow Jesus Yeah I'm gonna see the man's work Before What's that? I laid the ink down

You're what Did you not look at the guy Say you? Yeah I saw some some Instagram posts are you not feeling it chin also your your tattoo Brian could do it A lot of people could do it

You don't need fucking Miami to do you Let's not get a moon though No it's a little crescent would be sick It's like a crescent but then it's it's like With fish details That's what I'm thinking right now See? No I didn't even

Chittins can be so small though It's gonna be tough to do that No no I actually did My girlfriend did a thing right here It's gonna be like probably Like that big or oh oh oh Oh, we're going, okay. If I'm going to get out my neck.

Okay, Birdman. You get that reference. Yeah, yo. Yeah. Cash money. Cash money. Cash money. Makers?

That's sad. Dude, this is our first bonus episode. Fuck yeah. How do you feel about things? So far, so good. We're crushing it. Can't wait until fucking Will Sassow face time's in. Now, let me ask you this, Chin.

What? is it going to be? Siamese fighting fish? No, Siamese. Japanese fighting fish? No, that's due to detail. I was just joking.

Oh, really? Yeah, he can't get on his neck. It's way too detailed. So then maybe moon. Yeah, I'm going to see if this guy could actually do what I... Let me see that. Would you say, Chin?

Let me see if you can do what I imagine. Because I do imagine some different details, I think. Like what? So it'll be like a moon, but then there's going to be a lot of little, you know... Like fish skills on it? Not even gills, just kind of cool little shapes and stuff. And then little parts of like fish look, the eyes, maybe a couple of fins here and there.

Sure, sure. Yeah, no. It's going to be tough. I know it. Why don't you get... It's a have to be so big for that detail. It'll be bigger. How about that size?

Yeah, that's dope. Is that Tinkerbell? It looks like Sailor Moon. How about that size, though? A little too much? I was thinking smaller, but true tax. tattoo, brother. It's on your neck.

I also don't believe in running your tattoo by your friends or family. Really? No. The sway you want to do it. They sway me big time, yeah. And then you overthink everything and then, you know.

Yeah. But also the tattoo is on your body, so it should be what you want, not what anyone else wants. My body, my business. You see that necklace that girl has on her chest that sort of those dots?

That's really subtle and cool. Those are freckles, right? Those are freckles. Dude, I'll tell you right now, if a girl has a chest tattoo, she doing anal. Yeah. That's science.

Yeah. Yeah. And also if a girl has tattoos all over her neck up to her chin, you're like, I'd like to have sex with her once. Once. You know what I mean? Because sometimes you're like, ooh, there might be something. When I see a guy like that, I'm sure he's a nice person,

but I also, I have an inherent prejudice where I go, ooh, he may not be too stable. Yeah. Right? Yeah. Usually bad with business. It's a big, a big commitment. But I see a girl.

I'm thinking, I get horny. Hang on. Yeah. Hang on, brother. Yeah. When I see big felt dice in a girl's shitty sports car, I go, I'm busting her. She's a bad girl. Yep.

And she's got, like, fur around the license plate. I'm in. You understand? And lip liner and heavy eye shadow and all that. I'm like... Are you talking about a chola? I'm just looking at a fucking, no. I'm looking at a professional.

I'm looking at a cum dumpster. Too much. I'm sorry. I've been drinking. You've been drinking. Please don't ever say come dumpster. I apologize. I take it too much.

About a lady of the evening who's trying to make her rent. You're right. And she's in a Mazda MX7. You're right. The Mazda MX7 is 100% McGar. It's turquoise. It's 100% what I'm talking about.

Yeah. You got me. Yeah. Gum dumpsters too much. Well, there you go. It's Friday bonus. I'm just trying to type in Milf, just to see like a regular.

A regular one. Go back to those milfs. Let me see some. I'm with Brian on the. Now, define milf for me, because sometimes I'll see them and I'll go, that's not a milf? I'm just a hot chick with huge tits. That looks weird. Well, that one's really guzzling that cock.

Oh, that looks like a kid. Oh, no. No, that'd be a midget, Jim. Oh, Jesus Christ. Or a tiny person, apologize. Yeah, let's get that out of there. All right, that's enough. But also, the third one in, that might be our friend's girl.

last page last row third one in yep that might yep that might be our friend's girl oh no no all right yeah it might be no it's not

okay nice ass so where were we oh change your tattoo get it dude so moon fish is there any other is there a third

yeah let's just run through the ideas is there any writing you could do is there is there a what about musical notes what about a guitar music something about music. Why wouldn't you do something that is what you are? Like music, dude.

I've seen too many of those tattoos that to me, I'm sure that they look not some people. What is your favorite? What is your favorite? Chord. A flat. Is that the right word chord? I mean, is that? Yeah, but don't get that on your neck. What's your favorite verse, your musical verse that kind of moves you? What's the most

unique? It's like what I hear Zeppelin, like da-na-na-na-na-na-da-da. It's a unique. Yeah, you can get those tattoo? Well, if I was a musician, what would you do, Brian? What would be the unique inspiration? A moon with fish scales on it.

His first instinct was right. I want to be different. I don't want like a music note. That's not different. That's pretty different. That's pretty different. It's also random. Also, Led Zeppelin notes on your neck?

That's not very original, bro. Not Led Zeppelin notes, but whatever music moves you, inspires you. Cover your whole fucking neck. Hey, what we're cheating you. Hey, what we're talking about tattoos? Hit the showers. No, because I believe,

If you're going to write something, it's got to be specific and meaningful. No, it doesn't, though, Chin. It shouldn't be a panther with wings, right? This is the problem with older people. But a panther with wing. They put too much value. Like, it's too much of a big deal. I don't know, man.

It's only on your neck forever. It's on your neck. He can hide that with his sleeves, which he's already doing because he's self-conscious of his tattoos. Well, just why I do, stand up. Hey, be quiet. You have a hoodie on your 50-70. So what?

It's comfortable. Hey, Chin. You want the best piece of a thing? advice I can give you? Don't listen to Brian. Especially when it comes to tattoos in business. All right? Well, you should have gotten a tattoo by now, Brian.

You know what I mean? Leach Chin carries says what he's going to do, you know? I understand. If you guys can give me a tattoo, that's good. I'll get it. Get a fish in the shape of a moon. I like where his heads are. Oh, so maybe you get a fish in a shape of a moon.

A fish in the shape of a moon. That's what I'm doing. Oh, that's good. That's what I'm thinking of. That might be all right. Let me see it. I like a moon covered in fish scales. Also known as Capaccio.

You know when these... When fish turn, it kind of looks like a moon, like a sea shape. You know what I mean? I guess. What about that bad boy? I'm losing all the energy in my body. Too much detail, Chin. That's a cute little thing over there.

I don't think Chin's going for cute, especially on your neck. Yeah. What did your girl think? think of it, Chin. Was she in? No, she didn't like it. She didn't like it? No. God damn it. Well, me and cat, do. Well, uh, yeah. We'll think deeply about this.

Don't overthink it, though. No. I do want, I do want to, I've been wanting one for a long time. Dude, he tried get one when we're in Dublin. I wanted to get this on my neck in Dublin. Bro, just get a fucking, uh, get a T-I-83 calculator on your neck.

Get the testosterone molecule on your neck. What is Why don't you get a cock in the shape? Some guys have that problem. I'm spitballing. Some guys actually have that problem. What's that? They got a dickish.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all shaped up. I wonder why that is. That's just the way they're born. Oh, look at the testosterone molecule. That's nice. That's interesting. Real nice.

Oh, chin gets self-made on your neck. Self-made man. No regrets. Pursuit of testosterone. A lot of wild tetestrivate. There you go. There are. Shit, kids these days, though, they're even, you know, I might be a little outlandish tattoos.

Kids get face and net tattoos, like, that's their first ones now. It's just a thing where society, you know, it's just a thing. You're going to get CEOs with face tattoos. Part of being older is that you see as people get older and they were radical and crazy when they're younger. Boy, it becomes a difficult thing to kind of manage now. Yeah. I'm gonna try your I'm gonna try your ribs Jim go for it

get a piece of that meat on your fucking get a pair of tongs like Korean barbecue tongs Tongs alright so I think Will might be calling in right now let me check That's nice Jim Isn't it but now it's all cold

Good flavor Will call in I want to do uh Korean barbecue with you before Chen What city we're in Seattle Seattle? Seattle You need to go to L.A if it ever opens back up again, like you guys

gonna put... Hey, hey, the fuck he is. Yeah, can't see you guys, though. What? Oh, you got... It's gonna be tough to see him. Let me turn him a little bit more. I can see you guys. All right, we're gonna turn you.

We're gonna turn you. Give it a second, you fuck. Is that better, Will? Can you see him a little bit? That's great. Yeah, I can see them now. We're drinking whiskey, Will. It's Chin's birthday. Oh, happy birthday, Chin.

Thank you, Will. All right, let me get this camera. Hey, Will, Brian's trying to copy your haircut. Yeah, he's going to have to... It's looking good, Brian. I can see the crown here. That's nice. I have 17 hairs on the top of my head.

And my old man used to have something we called Tony Island. Just this. That was the only hair. It came out, you know... Okay, well, I have more than that, so I have more than that. For now. Man. Okay, well, don't be shitty.

Will, how's your 2nd20 going? Pretty, uh, been pretty mellow so far. Yeah. What do you do with your days, Will? What about you guys? Well, any tips for people in quarantine? Yeah, are you recording now? Yeah, we're recording now.

Yeah, we're not. Yeah, we are. Don't tell me when we are. You're live, bro. What are you drinking in your stupid mug? What's in that mug? Yeah, there's some coffee in here. Don't you have some.

sort of intro or something, don't we have to sit through 18 minutes of reads or something like that? No, dude, we don't. We already did that, Will. It's Will Saso. Hi, I'm Will Sassau. Yeah. Welcome me to the program. I am welcomed to the program.

I watch you. Brian and Brandon, it's great to be on the fighter and the kid. As you know, more importantly, as your audience knows, there's a deep connection between me and your audience. This has been going on for years over since I won the first guest in the year, right? All right, fine. You did win. And now since it's been rigged and I've been left off of that thing every fucking year until a few days in or whatever. That's on Chin. I've decided, even though I don't give a fuck, but because I have this, well, I give a fuck about your audience.

And because I have this relationship of the audience, I think it's time that I name myself, the people's champ. Oh, hey, hey, hey. Oh, wow. I want you to know, too. This is a fanny pack as the WWE World Championship my buddy Chris Fowler from back home gave me that

Well that's the coolest thing I've ever seen It's pretty cool, Will But you can't just name yourself The People's Champ I mean that's kind of like You know It seems a little obnoxious And you're acting puzzled now

I can see on your stupid face Yeah but I but this is something again I know it's the fighter and the kid And I know it's your podcast Yeah between me and the people. Okay, well, but you haven't... That's why we call...

That's why we call me the people's champion. Okay, don't sling that thing over your shoulder like that. Will, is that the same thing the Rock did? Am I right on that? Yeah, it might be a little gimmick infringement from the Rock. He did call himself the People's Champion. Just want to go like that, right? Just want to make sure, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. This is for everyone making memes at home, ready? That's good. That's good. Fucking perfect, dude. That's good. And then you got to go. Go ahead.

Another thing I want to talk about is I want to congratulate you guys on your format change. Well, what does that mean? What do you mean? Well, what do you mean? What do I mean? What do I mean? I'm congratulating you. So obviously you know about the format change.

Well, here goes some more liquid in your fucking face. And so that always annoys me. You just stop drinking. Yeah. Now, you keep drinking. Now, what do you mean my format change, Will? Well, it's real simple, Brian. This whole lockdown thing, this self-quarantine thing, of course, it's a voluntary thing.

And as far as, you know, the government goes. And look, you don't know a whole lot about my politics, but I will tell you, I'm about this close from going wild country and doing whatever the fuck I please. Canada is a great place for that. Wyoming may as well be Canada. and I'll fucking kill all the elk I need to eat. Don't need guns. I'll be the most Canadian elk murderer ever. How do you kill elk without a gun, dude?

It involves a rear naked choke because they like to charge. More on that later. Here's the thing. Let's not jump into whose politics and who you're going to listen to because I know you guys probably, well, I don't, you know, you guys clearly are just, you know, there's no masks there, the fighter and the kid. I think there's sort of that reverse 5G thing.

You think the mites killed coronavirus? Yeah, there you go. That's right. There you go. Spot on, Will. As you know, even shows like the Tonight Show and the Fokkaa late night, this and that, whatever, they're all shooting it from home and they're interviewing their spouses and children. You're talking about traditional media, Will? Is that where you're going with this?

Traditional media, the cucks? Correct. Okay. But fighter and a kid, not traditional media. No. Okay. And I'd like to congratulate you on. your change

your foreign change do news media because you consider yourselves an essential yeah an essential business you just glitched

thank God in the middle of oh no poor connection will get a better connection is it will's connection or ours got to be him huh it must be him it's you get a better connection

What's going on? You got dial-up? Is that what you're using? Using that dial-up? Yeah, I got dial-up. It makes that fact sound. Can you see me? Can you hear me?

Yeah, we can see you now. It's way better now. Way better now. Okay, so here's, so I want to congratulate you. Thank you. Your format change to news. Since you guys are an essential service and you're now providing the news, because clearly no one would just go into a fucking studio somewhere to record a podcast.

You're right, dude. That's not about MMA. I don't know. and just, you know, to fucking just shoot the shit, right? Thanks, Will. Right. Thanks, Will. I appreciate it, Will.

You know what's crazy, too? We've actually doubled down. We have three, three episodes a week now. That's right. During this quarantine times. Yeah. Oh, good. Because we are essential because we break it down, bro.

And tell them, how's business be? Better than ever. Boomin. I was hoping he said booming. Boomin. Booming. Boom. Okay.

So while, that's good. So while the people who do real work in this country are suffering by staying home, you guys are capitalizing on that by making money. And let's move on to that news. So what do you guys have to fucking tell me about the coronavirus as if you know what the fuck? No, no, hold on. Well, what questions do you got, Will? A couple things.

Both he and I are negative. Everybody in this room is negative. Number one. Number two. You've all been tested. Number two. Wait a minute. You guys have all been tested?

Yep. For what? Corona. For antibodies? Turns out we're all negative. Are you talking about that virus that may be asymptomatic? Yeah, but blood test, brother? Blood tests, brother. We took blood tests.

Ah, cool. So guys all live together then? Well. No, that's weird. So basically that blood test meant nothing. And then you got together. So it means nothing, especially when Brian, I got to see a fucking video of him fucking pupsing around with Voss Rutan up in fucking Oakland. That's a good point, Will. of fucking dudes, well, you know, so after you do that, it means nothing. That's good point. But I got tested after that.

I got tested after that. Here's the thing. Well, here's the thing, though. If we get it, we're fine. You're fine. I'm guessing you don't have any, well, there's one in the fucking directly in the screen, but do you have any eligible in your life? Hey, hey, just Brian.

Just Brian. Other than that, zero, brother. Listen up, sunshine. How old are your parents? I don't, they're in Denver. My parents are 80. Yeah, so are mine. Well, my dad just passed away. I'm not interested. I'm sorry, Will. I'm fucking mom to the coronavirus. I understand that. Now, I think if anybody is close to somebody who's at risk, they better be goddamn careful and responsible, which I am, which I am around Brian.

I agree with you guys there. I think what we're going to learn about this is that it's going to affect different people differently. Obviously, people with, you know, autoimmune issues, people who have diabetes. Out of shape. Liberals, liberals like you. liberals liberals like yourself liberals you know what I mean liberals anyone who was really hoping that Bernie would take the Democrats to get it won't vote for Biden

non-Americans like yourself people who want Russians will 100% get coronavirus and die but in order to achieve herd immunity we have to behave like the herd unless unless we're talking about the news

media which now the fighter in the kid is. So give me some news. Okay. What do you want to know? I got news for him. I got news for him. Let me give him. I got some fucking news. You got some fucking news. You know Texas is going to open it up next week? Yeah. Open up everything except for schools.

Texas is its own fucking country. Yeah. And those people, if you're fucking, tell you what, Texas is close to. Florida. And I'm sorry, Florida. Pretty far away. Pretty far away. All right. I got another one for you. I got more. I got another one for you. How about Ohio's opening up too? What do you guys say about? Ohio, really. Big Willie style.

I froze. Where we have slowed the curb because we've been staying outside. So look forward to cowboys, oil men, and cows to get all sorts of fucking coronavirus in Texas. And it won't matter in Ohio because LeBron's already here. Go on. Okay, hold on. Hey, Will. How long you want to shut down the economy for?

Now, hold on, Will, this, do this? No, here's more news. This two shall pass. Yeah. Come May 15th, I'm going to eat out to dinner. Yeah. Hey, Will, how about May 15th? We ride over to your castle and beat the shit out of you.

What do you see with that? He's hard to beat the shit out. He's pretty big. Come on over. I'll tell you what. If you want to come over to my fucking castle. He owns axes. See what I mean?

See what I mean? So I hit me with some stats. You know, how many people is coronavirus killing currently? Okay. You know what? Here's what's, I got interesting stat for you, Will. they projected two million. It's going to be under 60,000.

Well, they projected two million like two months ago. Yeah. That's what that word saying. Apparently Sweden that didn't enact much of a lockdown. But then you know what happened in those past two months, Brendan? We quarantined. That's right. So now it's going to be 60,000.

Yes. Except for you guys, because you're telling your audience to fucking pretend they live in Texas. No, we're not. Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying. No, I am. We're all practicing safe. We're all practicing safe. You are.

No, no. We're practicing safe. Hey, Will, people's champ. How long should we shut the economy down for? How long? Why don't we ask that fucking prick Newsom or this Dick Garcetti? Yes. Even though you may not have voted for them,

they didn't know more than you. And they have the work of a scientist and epidemiologist. Who's your epidemiologist? Okay, fuck. Hey, Will, if you keep this attitude up, I'm going to be there before May 15th. Yeah, and I'll tell you something else, motherfucker. You're fucking, you're negative, right, Brendan? I'm negative.

I'm negative. I'm going to come over there. We'll fucking, we'll fucking roll around and you'll separate both my shoulders and my knees and bloody my face. And when I show up to the hospital, they're going to say, sorry, no room for you, Mr. Sassow, because all these fucking beds full of coronavirus patients because you guys. Wrong, Will. You're wrong. You're wrong.

There's so many beds wide open. There's beds wide open, sir. Yeah, we do. We have more than enough ventilators here in California. Oh, we sent ventilators back. We used, we're so good. We sent them back. We said, well, yeah, Trump, and Trump is sending some to Russia. I, I do some epidemiology work, and I can tell you, this virus looks very different than most. There you go, Brian. We have a handle on it. Yeah. How does it look different, Brian? How is it different than, let's say, MERS or SARS? Very easy. It tends to be a little pricklier, a little bit more round.

A little more contagious. And a little bit more. Words that mean nothing. Yeah, yep. And it's got, it's just got, it's just got. a bit of a stickier kind of attitude, you know, and it tends to, you know, kind of gets in there, and causes some issues, and we're working on that right now. I have good friends that are really starting to crack this code, and we are very fucking close to coming up with treatment, and very close to come up with a virus in this country, which you are not from. So that's an important thing for our listeners to realize is that you are a bona fide, a bona fide collectivist, aka communist, from the north of fucking Canada.

and we'll take your country over if we want. So that's the other thing I want to say. I got news for you. I'll fucking tell you this, Brian. Yeah. American than you. What? You're more American than me?

I agree with Will. And I'll tell you why. Why? Two reasons. Number one, you were born on a ship in Singapore. Fuck you. And then your dad dragged you over in your diapers. And then you went to fucking whatever sort of weird boarding school and got stretched by a fucking

girls on the wrestling map. No, I did. Meanwhile, this guy, the real kid, Will the real Kid Sasso, decided to be an American. I decided. I made the choice.

I didn't just slip out of, you know what, I fucking decided, I'm coming down here. I'm taking my Canadian flag. I'm taking my world championship, and I'm coming down there. I'm way, more American than you, Brian.

As a matter of fact, come May 15th, let's do this. Apple pie eating contest. Oh, fuck you. Fuck you. That doesn't make you more American than me. Fuck you. I'm challenging you right now. As soon as this fucking lockdown is lifted,

apple pie eating contest. Or we can do it outside in a park, six feet apart, but you have to wear a mask. How fuck am I going to wear a mask and eat apple pie, you son of a bitch? I'll fucking show you how because I'm more American than you. You son of a bitch.

And I'll fucking choke down a fucking steak after that. That's right. I'll have a Texas meat dessert after my apple pie. A Texas meat dessert? God damn it, Will. You took us the task here. You got on this fucking podcast via little agenda. Who you working for?

And you fucking, you met us the riot act. And you're accusing us of being un-COVID safe. Well, because, well, you know what, Brian, here. Let me, let me, actually, let me do this. Watch your words, Will. Yeah, watch your words. I'm sipping 23-year-old whiskey, which has been proven, proven in a lab to fucking kill COVID in its fucking tracks. How's that water?

Yeah, why don't you stick a blow dryer in your mouth, too? Isn't it? Doesn't that work? That does work. That works out. And so does fucking, and so does going to church. And then just turn it out, what is it? 40 degrees, 140 degrees?

Yeah. 140. Yeah, and so does going to fucking church. Keep going. Hey, Will, if you're scared, go to church. I wish he wasn't glitchy. Me too. I wish you weren't glitched.

Yeah. You're wearing a mask now, Kat? My face is cold. It's not like for anything else. We lost you, Will. Oh, there you are again. You know what I'm talking about? She's dope.

Yeah, you're here now. Okay. All right. Brian, you know what? How about this for a fucking capitalist agenda? The more you ignore the lockdown and tell your audience that there's no fucking problem by way of, you know, just kind of, Do do do do go in here and there and everywhere

But we've never said that, Will. I'm not saying that. We're providing entertainment during these tough times. Yeah, you son of a bitch. Oh, right, you're providing entertainment because there's not millions of hours of streaming bullshit. Nope, we're not bullshit, though. We are quality news.

Will! You're asking for it, dude. Hey, and we do fucking current events, which is news. News. You can't hear you. Fucker. Is it working yet? Now you're back.

This is perfect. All right. All right. Here's my thing. The longer you ignore the lockdown, right? Yeah, which we're not. The longer you tell you're there. Entertainment.

Entertainment. Essential news. Okay. Not essential news. Okay. Wait. That's right. You guys are news now.

Yes. The longer you do that, the longer you do that, the longer we're going to have to push back the adventure return of the 10th. a podcast. So, or go, when I get, from now on, because we've dropped some hints, and, you know, Chris was like,

hold on, let's not tell everyone yet. And I was like, okay. And then someone hit me up saying, Brian just spilled the beans on some fucking military podcast, and they fucking sent me a link. I watched about a second of it, by the way. How boring was it, Will? How bored was it?

I got, I got so fucking bored I slipped into it. Anyway, I'm not going to go there. Here's the thing. Here's a thing. When those people blow me up on social media, I'm going to let them know that it's your fault. Now, hold on, Will. That's not fair.

That's not fair. Come May 15th, we're at it. We're at it with the 10-minute podcast. Now I'm going to rough you up a little bit, Will, so you might miss a few episodes, but I'm going to rough you up for this. You're getting fucking rough, dude. And I'm going to be jerking off in the corner.

Do you know, Brendan, are you familiar with, you know, when it comes to the people's champ and wrestling and this whole thing? Are you, are you, are you, you're familiar with the fucking comeback, someone getting their fire at the end of the match? Yeah, sure, man. Yeah, like, honking out and doing that whole thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And pointing in that whole thing.

So you better be careful because if you beat the living snod out of me, I'm going to halt up. And then you're going to have to suffer me. Okay, you're going to have to, you're going to jump a little bit when I slam you. And when I fucking drop the elbow, you're going to go. Hey, Will. Okay. And that's a good story.

That's a good story. That's a good story. New source. Stay down. Hey, Will, did you see the WWE trying WrestleMania with no crowd? I know you're a big Russell fan. I know this. How embarrassing is it with no crowd?

It was the wrong thing to do. Someone would say the most wrong thing to do. Well, I'm on, well, okay. Yeah, in the theme of today, yes, the wrong thing to do and one of the wrongest things to do. I watched less of that than I listened to Brian on that military podcast. It made no sense. It made no sense. It was like watching your cousins play fight in the basement.

Yeah, it was so awkward. It's weird to watch grown men do that. It's very weird. It's an indictment of the art form. Yeah, it is. Because I'll call it an art form, but I'll also make this face because when you're doing it without a bunch of people, they're going, it's like, well, what is it? It's just some people rolling around in a way that they've already planned.

Okay. That aside. Yeah. We have yet to get any news facts and figures out. We get any figures. Texas, Ohio. After we hang up on you, we're going into fucking, we're going into fucking current events, Jack. Yeah, news. And we had Dr. Drew on here. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, we had Dr. Drew on here who broke it down for us. Got me? And next you have Dr. Phil, who said that 360,000 deaths occur a year in pools across the country

when it's more, and when it's actually 3,600. So he's an idiot, and Dr. Drew is not. But how about this? Let's play a little game. I'll do some current events with you. Okay. Last week, last week from April 6th to April 12th, you guys know how many deaths occurred due to COVID-19? I don't, Will. But you know what I do know is deaths are down across the board in the United States. I know that.

Yeah, Will. Yeah. Are you getting that from the epidemiologist sitting next to you, Brendan? Yeah, he is. Where do you get your news, Will? I'm going to give you, what's that? Where do you get your news from Russia? From Russia or China?

My news from? Yeah, bro. A little something called the Center for Disease Control. And I encourage all of your fucking audience to check that out for themselves. Instead of just hearing Brendan and Brian saying, they're opening up Ohio. Hey, fuck. It's a son of it.

Well, dude. Just two guys fucking talking while drinking whiskey had in Dixie cups. So you can do this. You can fucking go to the CDC. and think for yourself, or you can listen to these two fuckers drinking whiskey out of sexy paper cups

and just meat dessert. Man, you're fucking out of your mind. You're on your mind, dude. And I'll tell you what, May 15th, we're not going to last, dude. You know, the good news is that this, the peak is likely already happened. There's been

less hospitalizations as a few days ago than there were a few days before. A lot of hospitals are shutting down, Will. You know that? Because they don't have enough patience. Did you know that? What's that? Some hospitals are actually shutting down in California because they're not enough patience. Brendan, please don't share things that Brian

told you that he may have heard from someone else with a podcast just before you started rolling. Here's one thing I have to ask you. Do you guys know what the number one killer of people was last week, the week, between the days April 6th to April 12th? It might have been coronavirus.

Probably COVID-19. No, it was not. It was heart disease. Oh. I got it right here. Heart disease was responsible from April 6th to April 12th for 12,6,000, 26th. I'm sorry, I'm starting to sweat, dude. I'm starting to fucking sweat, because you're pissing me off, Will, and I'm going to take my coat off.

Cancer, 11,437, and on down the line, accidents was 2,911. Diabetes was 1,586. The flu, pneumonia, right? the common influenza 1,227. Suicide was 876. Yeah, sure. Where was COVID, Jack?

Hey, it will just shut you a little mouth for a second. I know. I got some news for you. Did you know what the economy getting so shitty and everybody losing their job? Suicide is going to go through the fucking roof. Did you ever think about that?

I think about suicide all the time, Brendan. Oh, fuck, Will. Don't make this all heaven. All right. Well, let's not make it about you, dude. Let's not make it about you. I'm talking about society in general. Fuck, Will.

Number two, COVID-19 was responsible for 12,392 deaths. That's five times the size of Pearl Harbor, which maybe your daddy told you about Brian. Hey. And if this continued, if this continued, sure, it's a peak. It's April, right? Let's hope it goes away. No, it's going away.

Distancing. Yeah, well, it's going away because people are on lockdown. That's right. The fighter and the kid podcast or watching Seinfeld reruns or any number of fucking fucked up docu series. I'm a supporter. I'm a supporter of the of social distancing, smart. Yep.

Smart policy. You're not. No, you're not. I am. I am. If this continued for a full year, right? And keep in mind, we don't have a, we can't have a vaccine for another 17th. Yeah.

If it continued for a full year, that's hundreds of deaths. Hundreds of thousands. Hey, why are you laughing at that? Why are you laughing? You think it's going to continue at that trend, Will? That's insane. Well, he just broke into laughter. I'm not, because I'm an optimist, and I'm an American.

Not American. You want me to get the fucking passport? Okay, take it easy. All right, fine. Anyone can get a passport. Do you say anyone can get a passport? Yeah, I got a guy. I know a few guys.

All right, listen, my back is hurting from leaning forward like this. And I'm sweating. You're super critching. Because you're making me blood red mad. To use your word, you're making me blood red mad, dude. You're going to get fucking smack around. I'm a centrist. I'm a fucking staunch libertarian.

I'm not a fucking fan of any politician or political party. I use fucking this. And I find the fucking stats that makes sense. Okay? Yeah. Yeah? Yes, I do. All right.

Not just how I feel. Not just how I feel. Sure, sure. Hey, Will, you know Texas, Ohio is opening up? Yeah, you burn my chain. And why don't you fucking move there, Brendan? Yeah, we will. Maybe we will.

Hey, stop doing it. All right. Your arms are bigger. Big deal, dude. What the fuck? Stop flexing, bro. You look like the guy from 90-day fiancé. Dude, stop doing that, man.

You're going to die. All right, listen, Will, we want to thank you for popping in. We really, we really... That's it. I'm cut out now? No, it's just that you're hard to hear you because you're glitch. My night hurts, dude. You're also super glitchy. And you're a communist?

I'll tell your audience this. You guys, please stay tuned for the eventual return to the 10-minute podcast when Brian gets the head out of his ass. And until then... Okay, well, that's great. That's great. All right, we saw that. The people's champ.

We got it. Now, Will, we look forward to getting you in studio. And I'm going to see. Listen, I'll tell you what. I'll tell you fucking what. As soon as this shit gets relaxed, even a little bit. Because, look, 100% honestly, I'm doing what I'm doing as an example. Just because I feel like it's the right thing to do, and that's my opinion and that works for me.

I appreciate it. You guys have a business that's already rolling. I like that you guys have gone the deal. distance to get tested, you know, and that sort of thing. I know you guys are hearing a lot of stuff from a lot of different people because you've put yourselves out there. I don't have a podcast currently. Fucking won't for at least the next month because of Brian.

But I will say, I will say I agree that this is going to, I, from everything I've read and heard and I read a lot more than the both of you, clearly. No way, dude. Oh, fucking, oh, I fucking, that's one thing a Canadian will do is read circles around a four. Oh, wow. No, you don't. A landed, a landed American Canadian read circles. No, no.

Read circles around you. No. I'll read sermons around you. I'm hearing and what I'm reading and, and, and what's his name, Newfam? Newtsum. Yeah, you read a lot. Gavin Newsome the other day, he talked about, okay, here are the fucking fine. things I need to see, rah, rah, rah.

Once the fucking numbers come down and numbers, Brendan, numbers are not states, okay? So when you say, here are the numbers, Ohio, Texas. Yeah, but California's going down, Will, we're actually kicking out. We need a 14 days of decline, of steady decline. That's right.

Which is happening. We know all this, Will. Any other brain busters? Right. It's happening because everybody, but you guys is on lockdown. And what's going to happen then is, you know, he says, okay, restaurants are going to look a little differently. They're going to space the tables out. We're going to throw away the fucking table covers.

Everyone's going to be wearing gloves and masks, this and there. Sure. People with, I'm in the best shape of my fucking life. Okay. So I'm not worried about a little respiratory disease. I will chug a fucking, I'll put salt in your whiskey, gargle that, and run up a hill. All right.

Okay. But that's just me. So, once things to relax a little bit, I do think that everyone, that we should look at it in different stages. Unfortunately, we can't contact trace because we don't We're in phase one right now. We're in South Korea. We're in phase one.

We're in phase one. Phase one. Yep. Phase one of what? Whatever. Phase one of the program to come back to let the economy come back. Phase one, bro. Okay, phase one.

So once we can actually come back and it's more about and we've spread it out with regard to who should be going to work and who shouldn't, I got no problem sitting in a room with, you know, five or six fucking people. Yeah, and we're going to beat you up. We're going to beat you up. You're going to be disciplined for this podcast. He came on there with an agenda. Show me your little dicking.

Do you want to show you my dick? Did Newsom set you up to this? Is that what's going on here? You run it for governor, you fuck? You know what? I can run for governor because that's something a Canadian can do. An Austrian did it over here in California, right? So a Canadian can do it.

So here's the fucking news, Brendan. If you fucking get, if you, you know, fucking pull an octagon, you know, on here or whatever, That what they say? Yeah. In MMA. Sure. I've never heard of that term. I'm a, sure, I'm a decorated high school athlete, right?

And I'd say a good physical comedian. But if you decide... He's coming out. Yes. What? He's back. Hold on. Is he back?

Hold on. He'll give you so much better in person. Oh, he's the best. Of course. Of course. I told you dial up the nightmare. This is the one thing I hate about fun. There he is.

There he's back. I'm sorry, we missed your liberal rant. Finish your thought? What I was saying was when Brendan finishes reaching into my mouth, dislocating my jaw while he punches my ribs purple, and then I become the governor, I'm going to make it harder for you to get out of prison, Brendan. Hey, man.

That's not cool. Hey, well, friends, Will. That's a smug face. I know we're friends. And you know who else was friends? Tim Robbins and that fucking warden with the glasses and the mean face. He thought they were friends. friends. And then I'm going to do that. And in the end, there won't be any Morgan Freeman

waiting for you in Zwanthanjo, motherfucker. I will keep you in a cushy Sacramento prison, dude, because I will fucking run for governor, especially after I win that fucking apple pie eating contest. You heard it here first, folks. The people's champ versus the kid. It's the real kid versus the kid. Apple pie eating contest. No, I didn't say yesterday. Who's more American? No, I didn't say any of this. All right, look, Will, we appreciate you. you joining us. We love you. Thanks a lot.

You're smoking. Can we take a photo? Yeah, let's take a photo. Take a picture, Will. Hold on. Stay there. We're going to take a picture. You're still there?

I'm here. I don't know what's that. Oh, God. Well, listen, buddy. Brian, give you a little bit. Brian, gift them your dick. Doing current events. Let's see what's happening.

Current events. In this current event, Brendan Shaw with huge arms, getting tattoos. Yeah. getting tattooed by a dime piece. Right in that bike, dude. A big strong guy.

Do you guys even want to talk about this one? I mean, they're all going to be, you know, closely related to COVID-19. Oh my gosh. That's just what it is. I'm kind of dumb ass would think alcohol stops Corona. Well, because it's a disinfectant. That doesn't make any sense. Would you drink whiskey to get rid of the flu?

Well, does anybody's looking for excuses to drink? True. People are like... Alcohol sales are through the roof. 55% increase from the... this time last year. I'm drinking a lot. At night,

when I have nothing to do, and at night I'm like, I'm like, if you put anything in front of me right now, I'll do it. I really only drink here. The only time I drink is when I'm working. I don't drink at home.

I don't do that. Yeah, the World Health Organization came out and said that they wanted to remind everyone that drinking alcohol will not help them. Well, you realize how stupid,

I don't mean to rep your cat. You realize how stupid people are? Well, like, it's like this. They think alcohol. the injury you get through the corona or when the hurricane was hit in Florida and people are they have to give out a warning saying please don't fire automatic weapons into the into the hurricane because it actually doesn't affect it what huh that was an actual warning

they go please bullets will not phase the hurricane it's awesome please don't fire your guns into the hurricane excuse me some people are fucking so dumb it's a hurricane that crazy yeah whatever what else you got okay since march madness has been

oh is this oh i got a picture you see the 10 yesterday Brian what did I tell you not I'm not saying it's right but a lot of people I'm telling you people aren't going to get locked down for too much longer

they most people 50 and under who are healthy you're going fuck this dude I'm about to freak out I'd rather take my chance to get corona did I send you this chin what a picture of the 10 the 10 freeway

no Bumper to bumper traffic? Yeah. No, I was in traffic today. Oh, no, I'm talking, dude, bumper to fucking bumper, bro. No, I wasn't bumper to bumper traffic on the end of the route here. Here it is. This is the tension yesterday.

Your boy was on the 10. Oh, my feeling. Go ahead. Take that in. Because you look at Michigan, they're protesting. They're just, the people are like, dude, we have no money. We're fucking hungry. How many kids are going to starve?

Because they don't get the meals at home. I'm sorry, they don't get the meals at school. How many kids are going to starve? That's one of the current events. There are a lot of protests popping up throughout the country where people are poor. Yeah, they're basically saying that they need to get back to work.

You got to remember that unemployment was at 3.2% before this. Do you know that that's more than full employment? That's more than full employment. I think it was 22 million people are unemployed right now. That's up attention. Wow. Wow.

Yesterday. Wow. Wow. Bumper to bumper. People aren't having it. Who sent you that? It's someone posted this on Twitter. Holy shit. This is the 10-year-shay. People are getting very anxious and don't want to be cooped up anymore. Damn. They're looking at the statistics going, hold up. I'm healthy. I'm under 50. I don't hang around old people.

Why the fuck am I still staying inside? Well, I think, I've tried to be really neutral about this to an extent in terms of I don't know enough about this virus, right? No one does. Yeah, we do know there's a full-scale investigation to see if this actually was a military virus that came out of a Wuhan lab. So I don't know. But I will say this. I think historians are going to look at this in the near future. And really, we're going to get a very clear picture on whether or not this was a major overreaction.

Do you see Sweden? Yes. Did it lock down. Numbers are very similar to ours. They are. So I believe that there has to be, and this is no. This is no sort of dig on anybody, but there's got to be a smarter way to do this. That's not very COVID safe.

Sorry. You understand? So I think we're going to find, I think we're going to find a more creative way to deal with a pandemic. Got caught with our pants down this time. We might not freak out. Yeah. But we have to come up with a more creative way. We just do.

And we will. And we will. What's this? We have to create our way out of this problem. Create our way. So because March Madness was canceled, there's a surplus of chicken wings here. in the States because nobody is going out of their way to buy chicken wings. I don't feel like chicken wings during this time.

No. Plus people aren't going out having barbecues, grilling, or anything like that. You know what the thing about doing with sports? Well, especially NCAA football. And this is the number one reason why college athletes should be paid, especially in football. You know what they're going to, because they don't think it's safe to have people in the arenas. But that's how they, you know, that's how almost all colleges make their money is off the football

program. So they're saying, well, financially, these institutions, these universities are going to shut down unless there's a football season. So they're, what they're, one thing, one plan that's in play, that they're thinking about doing, they're going to push the football season to the spring because the, the university needs money. And then what do you think is doing the fall, the same season? So those kids would play 12 games or 18 games, I remember they fight at BCS. It's a three months off. Oh, a three month? That's hilarious. A month off. And then play another season. they doing that for financial reasons that's the only reason they will do it for financial reasons to save the universities and you don't want to pay these kids yeah and you're going to force them

because of financial reasons to risk all this yeah to save the institutions that's insane it's insane it's insane it's not fair what the athletes should do is go we're unless you give us a piece of the pie we're not fucking playing in the spring or the fall and then your your favorite players like lawrence the starting quarterback for clempton who's supposed to be the number one pick well he's not going to play because he's going to get drafted in the fall. So why would he play this weird season in the spring? Sure. And he's definitely not playing in the fall.

Because risk injury? He's going to skip all of it because he's going to get ready for the season in the fall of the NFL. Wow. Wow. That's a problem to think about. Fuck, yeah. Well, this virus is going to change a great deal about how we do a lot of stuff. It's going to be very interesting to see.

It really is. And I would imagine that because people have been forced to use things like Zoom and stuff for, for conferences and meetings like Microsoft, you're probably going to see more of that too. You know? You hear about Zoom? The stock? No, no, they're not prepared for the data collection that they're doing.

Oh, wow. So, yeah, people shouldn't, I don't know. You got to have to say anything. Yeah. A lot of people have been getting hacked on Zoom. There have been people like basically going into classroom sessions and disturbing. some of it has been like just jokes kind of drawing dick pics yeah dick picks asking like stupid questions

people being like who's that and then there are other instances where people are going in saying racist shit not hilarious not funny it's what people do just like young idiots I remember when I was with my buddy in high school boarding school and they were doing a play and uh

fucking we get behind the curtain they're doing a play they're in the middle of play me and my idiot friend get behind the curtain and my buddy we're like he and my buddy just goes I want to suck your tits screams at the top of his lungs in the middle of the play right behind the curtain oh we ran all i'm gonna send you this jim this made me laugh so hard i don't know why it's because quarantine times things are so fucking stupid but this lady's ordering and her son wrote down what he wants and her son added her son added sloppy weener

so she's going cheese she's reading for it she goes fries cheeseburger chicken sandwich and a sloppy weiner and the the guy's like excuse me I don't know why I thought it was so fucking funny

I love stupid shit I'm a sent teen out gin this is so fucking funny I love stupid shit like that it made me laugh so I can tell this story because death Tony Jeffries has talked about this,

but when he was on the Olympic team, the national team in London, the Olympics were in London, Tony was on the team, and Billy Joe Saunders was on the team. And they would all get together with the other athletes in the Olympics, and they would ask him to sign all this stuff, balls, boxing gloves, giant pictures. Well, somebody kept drawn a huge cock on everything.

And it was such a problem that the commissioner got all the athletes together, goes, hey, listen, we auctioned the stuff off to pay for a lot of important stuff. Whoever's drawing dicks on things, you will be found and you will be kicked out of the national team if you keep doing this. We don't want to see it again. Now, there's a thing back there, there's a poster. We want everybody signed. We better not see a dick on it. Well, this dude, Billy Johnson drew a huge cock.

He was already one of my favorite boxes on it. He drew a huge dick on the poster again. I love that guy. Tony said they could not stop laughing. Every time he did it, it ruined all the stuff. He is so awesome. Who's he fighting next? Who were they talking about him and Canello?

He fucked up, though. Because he made a video. He goes, I know a lot of people with their significant other right now, you're getting on each other's nerves, and he's on a heavy bag. And he goes, so this is how you stop him. He goes, when your girl's arguing, she's giving you shit. Well, it was bad. He goes, you hit her with a left hook, and she's going to be a little wobbly.

And then you finish her off to the body. And he's like, and that bitch won't say anything. Oh, dude. Game over. His boxing license got revoked. Fuck, man. I mean, fuck. How stupid.

And he's like, I was only joking. It's like, suspended, right? He's suspended, yeah. Suspended, yeah. Fuck, dude. Come on, don't do this.

Well, you're not going to fight a megastar like, Cannell. Have an older friend like me who can be like, no, no, no, no. That's not funny, though. It's not funny, dude. Play this, Jen, you got the volume up? Yeah.

Just mix it into the video. She's or not at Sonic, I think. Yeah. Let's just do that. His teenage son made the drive-thew order for his mom. Yeah, the kid's meal. So there was a cheese fry and the kids meal.

Uh-huh. Okay, ultimate fries and fast. Yes. Okay. And a sloppy wiener. He's such a jerk. I am so sorry. The guy's not laughing at all.

He goes in a cheeseburger? She goes, yeah, in a sloppy weeder. That's not a thing. That's not a thing. a sloppy what he's that's so fucking stupid and a sloppy weiner sloppy dong

oh man it's so fucking stupid and a sloppy weiner what else you got man we're 10 years old that's just funny I was so funny

laughing out loud this morning at this stupid shit protests against stay at home orders pop up across the country what I tell you being yeah you did you've always had your you have good

your finger is always on the pulse. Yep. People throughout this country are tired of being unemployed. So a lot of people are going out of their way to protest. Now, now, I'm telling you, now, wait for these other states and start open up. I know Will makes fun of me, but they are opening up. Ohio, there's a plan for them to open up. Not yet, but there's a plan for them to open up. Ohio, Texas, all these, they're plan to open up, right? So when people see them open up and our numbers are better than them and our fucking liberal pussy governor wants to lock us down, I'm telling us down, I'm telling hell many people aren't going to put up with it.

And that's why you see the 10 bumper to bumper traffic. That's why when you go to the park, it's packed with bike riders. Like you said, people are, first of all, this is very difficult for a lot of people. This is very scary for a most difficult. And it's scary. You know, when you say, for example, well, your 409K is not as important as human lives, that's not a fair thing to say to people because we're not, people are not, you can't say if somebody's really terrified at their retirement that they've worked their whole life,

that they don't also care about human lives. That's not what's going on here. People are terrified and desperate about their futures and about this impending depression. And I think you're right when they actually look at the hard numbers and they go, I'm not generally an at-risk person. What if I do have the antibodies? What if I am negative and I have friends who've had it?

I now know six people have had it. And they're fine? And it sucked. It sucked. I know people have had it and they don't show symptoms. But it sucked. And there are a lot of people that are asymptomatic. And I agree with this guy.

Obviously, I'm way over here, right? Like there's people in the middle, people over here won't leave their house, wear masks, while they have sex, and then I'm over here. I kind of agree with this guy. Give us all the information we need and let us decide, especially we're 50 under with no outlined conditions. This dude says the government at all levels has overstepped its authority in the request to protect Americans from the virus. While well-intentioned, it's naive for the mayor and others to think shutting down our local economy will protect families. The American citizens is perfectly capable of deciding how to best protect themselves. We have a rich history of solving problems without government interference.

True. Give us information and suggestions. If you must, then step aside, allow Americans to take action and solution. I think that's a very fair and certainly very American. If they're educated. If they're educated.

Yes. You have to be educated in a situation and can't go around older people or people with outline conditions. But, dude, if you're under 50, you have no underlying conditions and you're healthy, dude, go back to work. And you're going to see all these other states do it. And our fucking liberal governor is going to drag us longer and longer. The economy's going to go like this. Suicides can go like this.

I think the governor and people like this are also terrified. They were terrified because they didn't have all the information. Well, they want to be oversafe. They're going to be overstayed. They were terrified that they would have 300,000. You know, I think Newsom was looking at New York with a lot of terror. New York was losing, you know, so many people. and most of them very old

but that's not to say that those lives don't matter. Again, my parents are 80 fucking would hate to lose that would be the worst but so I understand a governor erring on the side of caution there's no doubt that it's a fucking difficult time. This is a very difficult thing to

navigate. It really is man. It's just it's really difficult. I found myself saying I don't know a lot you know. I'm a dumb ass. I don't know. But I think you're right. I do think that we get to a point where I don't know, but I'm willing to risk it before the economy goes into more. A smarter way to do this, especially in the future.

Let's learn from this. Let's figure out a way to be targeted with our quarantine. Learn from everything. Learn from anything. Learn from New York who, you know, was overwhelmed with things in the house wasn't ready. Learn from Sweden that didn't lock down, and the rates are the same as this. Learn from South Korea that shut down early in Taiwan. Learn from fucking China.

That was complete disaster. Well, China wasn't transparent. They're not going to release stats, but, you know what I'm saying? China didn't really share their information for at least five weeks with us. Yeah. And the Chinese Communist Party, not the Chinese people, the Chinese Communist Party. Big distinction. What's this, Jen?

This is something to get out of the whole Corona thing. This is just something fun that Powell Peralta, you know that skateboard brand, skateboard dude. Okay. Yeah. Anyways, just watch. Oh, my God. Just like that song. Oh, they're so good.

They're brothers, yeah? I would imagine. These kids are great. Oh, cuties. His brother's over it, though, on the left. His brother was over it. That's so funny. That's pretty badass man.

Dude, you don't realize, like, my son's only four. And yesterday, I was going to get my tattoo, right? I was going on at 11. I was going to be there for two hours. And he was, Papa, where are you going? And he was, Papa, where are you going on you? I got to go to work. Because if I don't want to describe it, so I'm going to work.

I come back and he goes, where are you? And I go, look what Papa guy who showed my tattoos. He loves tattoos. And I go, look at my tattoo. He goes, but you didn't go to work? I go, well, he goes, you said you're going to work. I know he goes Getting a tattoo is not going to work Papa

Wow I'm like damn dude Dude I can't wait to see him today I was like dude take it easy I get to see him today I can't fucking wait So cute I can't wait Getting a tattoo is not going to work

He goes you lied I guess yeah but I meant I was getting work done with a tattoo He goes that's not going to work I'm arguing with him right now All right that's cool He cracked me up in that video Okay let me watch that video

He's like Always on the phone and it's a calculator So funny What else you got, one last one? Just a fun one. This is Tyson Fury. You know how I said on Blow the Belt?

He did this like exercise thing with his wife. Yeah, yeah. So he did this with his wife on Instagram Live. And then his son, well, I'll play for it. His son says some crazy shit. Star jumps 10. I'm working out to you. Get out.

All of you. All of you. Go play computers are outside. You're under your feet. Fuck yeah. Sarjums 10. He's all happened. He's all what happened.

Dude, fuck you, you, you break. Dude, I'm glad I'm. Dude, how about, so me and my son

play a game where I go, how about I rip your, how about I rip your nose off? He was how about I rip, we just keep naming body parts, and how about I rip your lips off? He goes,

how'd by rip your teeth off? I go, then I'm gonna rip your eyes off. He goes, how about your fucking ears off with it? Dude. What? I was like,

what? What? What the fuck? My son loves to do that. He hears me cuss on the phone. That's where he gets it from. My son did that. I don't fucking care.

Like, whoa. They say not to tell kids like, you can't say that. That's a bad word. Never use that word. I go, where'd you get that? He goes, from you. Yeah, it's like, you know when to use it. You obviously are going to hear it.

No one to use it. He's in school. I recorded him yesterday. He didn't know he was being recorded. And then some stuff I fucked up on as a dad because I just take a piss. We're in the hot tub. And I pee and there's yellow.

You piss in the hot tub? It's my hot tub. And it's chlorine. You just pissing? I put some pools and hot tubs, dude. You're so fucking... It's chlorine. So I pee in the hot tub.

You can pee in the hot tub. My girl goes, hold on. No, he can't. I go, why not? She goes, because he can go to his friends. It's also urine. Yeah, but it's my pool and there's tons of chemicals that kill it. But chemicals kill it.

I don't care. Don't piss in your fucking pool. You never peed in a pool? No, I don't do that. Ever? No, I don't piss in pool. Oh, oh, I'm sorry, Brian. You're never going to my phone.

guy, the same guy when I went to the beach with him, dug a hole. Yeah, and put his old piece out and pissed in the same. Yeah, I did that. Because are gross. But I'm not going to piss in the goddamn fucking, you know. It's my pool. Oh my gosh. But my girl brought up a good point.

She goes, no, he can't do. I go, he can't be in the pool. There's chemicals. It's fine. I got to be in the pool before. She goes, here's the problem, Brent. I didn't think. She goes, he's going to go to his friend's house.

He's going to be at school and they go to a pool thing. and he's getting a piss in it and all the kids are like oh that's right you're peeing pools i was like i didn't think of that yeah and you just piss in a pool oh it's my pool and pissing and pissing your fucking hot tub welcome to the shop pool not just your pool hot tub you would piss in anyone you pissed mcestered yeah just a hundred piss piss that annoys me about you really yeah you're piss in a you're gonna have to edit this out i've seen you anyways i've seen you wash or i've seen i've heard you wash your ass and sinks before. I'm not going to say if I watch my ass and sinks. Let me explain this to you.

Know that my whistle is always as clean as the plate you take out of the fish rolls. And if I was a gay man, I'd respect that. Yeah. I keep my whistle trimmed and tight. I mean smooth, tight, tight, and clean. I can't walk around with a dirty

whistle. I can't do it. Yeah. Good for you. You don't. Yeah. It's a very clean whistle. Yeah, man. And I got an impressive dick. And I'm sorry to say that. He'll just send me pictures. I'll open it up.

And I'll just go, yeah, there it is. It's just this impossible, lazy cough. Just a lazy old heavy piece. There it is. Some days when I'm just my, I'm tired, my body's tired, my pizza hands are. Hey, he doesn't play with the dick pics is when you and I send them in the group chapter and you mean Delia. Delia really doesn't partake that.

Delia sends me dick picks. I've had plenty of dick pics. He really doesn't play with it. I don't know. Bad term. I've had him send me. his dick half-mast. He's got a, he beats both of us.

Delia's got a piece of him. Rogan one time, I, I pretended I was catching a mouse, and then I brought the camera over, and I was squeezing my soft piece as hard as I could, so you could just see pieces of it coming out of my knuckles. Yeah. And he was like, he was just like, whatever. I was like, well. It makes you feel so stupid and people don't play with that game? I know, I was like, hey.

Oh, what you feel the most stupid? I know. I'm like, oh, you're not the guy, I guess, descend. And I understand, maybe I should grow up. Maybe because I was in my late 40s when I did it. I understand, but. Well, I said my girl Dick Big and I go, man, this thing, something's wrong with it. She goes, why?

I go, it bit, something bit it and got all swollen. And she goes, well, you need you go to the doctor. I went, no. When I'm, all right. My, Amanda, when we were married, she was with a group of her friends at a, they were all like, she had this girl group that would get together for brunch. and I sent her an impossible picture of my good lighting I mean just heavy full mast full mass

the thing was literally stretching my skin and you did it angle back out of you yes I did it and I just went thinking of you good doosha and it was before she would have it and it just popped up on the screen she's like ah trying to cover and apparently those girls know what's up they should know what's up they know what they definitely know they know what's up yeah you get a lot of dickpicks cat yeah funny ones I'll send to my

friends. Girls talk about. Please send us to us. Do you want them? Yeah. Okay. They say that your friends, your, your girls' friends know everything about your peace because she'll.

Absolutely. Right? Everything. Yeah. Everything. All right. Chin's girl. When I came in today, I came in early.

And she had a mask on. She goes, hey, good to see. I'm like, who the fuck is here? I was like, I go, excuse me. Do I know you? She goes, I'm Chin's girlfriend. I felt so stupid. She goes, I'm Chin's girlfriend.

Did you met her before? Yeah. You guys both. You guys both. You guys both. You guys both met her. She had a mask on. She had a dress on.

That's tough. San Francisco. Cubs. I thought, for a second, I thought it was back. I'm like, what the fuck? She's gorgeous. She's beautiful. Yeah, she's, well done.

Chin. Thank you. Well done. She's make you dinner tonight for your beating. My birthday. Slop it Joe. Slop and sloppy, sloppy Joe. Yeah.

A sloppy winner. Slop a winner. Yeah. What else you got? That was it. That was the last one. It was a long show. Bonus spot.

It was it a long show. I hope so. Is that it? Awesome. Bonus. I'm not mad. Are you mad at the bonus Fridays? I love the bonus Fridays.

I think we should do a lot of bonus Fridays. Me too. All quarantine long. What else are we going to fucking do? Besides, dude, hey, I was talking to Jay,

because we got over eight weeks before that Spokane Washington date end of June, which you're going to come with me. It's looking good. It is? It's looking very good. Fucking A man.

Because they're already open, they're ahead of the curb. So they got hit the first. I am so down. How fun. with that. I'm so down, bro. Spokane, you better get your fucking mouth ready. Positive attitude.

And you know, do you understand that Washington wines, I got a place in Spokane. They got some fucking beautiful wines. Well, now you need to step your cardio up because you know, Daddy started a thick boy's bike club. In every city I go on tour, we get together and we ride bikes in the mountains. Is that true? That's true. Think boy bike club's real and we have merch and jerseys.

So videotape that for me. Send it to me. You're not going to go? Not a bike rider, Bubba. I'll beach cruise. I'll beach cruise. Not a big mountain biker. Plus, I'm not a thick boy.

Boy, you're on or you think, boy Yeah, I can get in there It'd be fun though Jay's getting involved It's gonna be fun I'd do it with him Dude, Spokin's me so fun I can't fucking wait

That's the only thing Get me through the days I can't wait How badly do you miss Getting up on stage, Bob Yeah All right kids That's it

Chin where are my noodles Oh yeah We can make them if you want The noodles are down us This hot chicken ramen It's too late I got it All right

We can make in Then I'll bring it On Monday Okay Is that it? That's it? Thank you.