The Fighter & The Kid - Timmy No Brakes Opens Up — Kill Tony Fame, Being Hated & Comedy Identity | TFATK Ep. 1146

Episode Date: December 9, 2025

Timmy No Brakes joins The Fighter & The Kid to break down the real story behind his Kill Tony rise, Austin comedy journey, and the online backlash that turned him into a “villain.���Timmy talks about:• Kill Tony exploding his career• How a misnamed hometown became a running bit• Getting passed at The Comedy Mothership• Why internet fans accused him of being an “industry plant”• How sudden attention created self-doubt• Being misunderstood as a character comic• Learning to perform outside his persona• Dating & confidence issues tied to his stage identity• Acting Off bits and using discomfort as fuelBrendan and Bryan dive into how Timmy handles being polarizing, why Kill Tony launches some comics into chaos, and how Austin comedy evolves talent fast.TRUEWERK - Upgrade your day with workwear built like it matters. Get 15% off your first order at truewerk.com with code FIGHTER.Aura - Exclusive $35 off Carver Mat at https://on.auraframes.com/FIGHTER. Promo Code FIGHTERBRUNT - Our listeners get $10 off their entire order with code Fighter at checkout. That’s http://bruntworkwear.com/fighter and use code Fighter. Order today and let them know you heard it here on the show.DraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code FIGHTER. That’s code FIGHTER, bet five bucks and get $200 inbonus bets if your bet wins.Progressive - Visit http://progressive.com/ after this episode to see if you could saveO'Reilly Auto Parts- https://oreillyauto.com/FIGHTERSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Yes, we did, because we back at it again. It's the fighter and the kid. This is really the fighter and the kid. Come on, baby. What's up, buddy? It's good to see you, buddy. Now, since we spoke, you went to Tucker's party. Went to Franklin, Tennessee.

You ever heard of it? I've been there. I've been there. I was invited to that party. I did not make it. I got a text from Tucker's assistant, and I realized that I hadn't gotten back to it because I didn't know what it was

then I looked at it. I was like, that's Tucker's assistant. Long story short, you went there. Tucker invited you personally. Yep, flew out there. Can I get some color on that? Flew out there on a- Looks like you were there with Theo. Flew out there on the jet, flew out there on the jet, heavy on the jet. I was nervous about going because I went with the Diesel brothers, both Dave's, right? Dave Sparks and Diesel Dave. And I get, that's, so that's him in the middle. The boys. And then, yeah, on the bottom right, who looks like a straight miner in

that carbon fire cowboy hat that's diesel Dave and then that's Dave sparks big boys which one uh no cletus in the back is he's taller than me oh okay cleatis so in in my world like the truck car world oh that's like the mount rushmore i have no business being in that picture really that that that boy that the whistling diesel on the left uh-huh your kids probably know he's the biggest really yeah in the truck world uh just in in in the car automobile like youtube space. Okay. I mean, I don't know.

What does that mean, Vegas? Like, what does he do? Seven figures a month off YouTube. What's he do? Uh, Whistling Diesel,

who, if you go to his Instagram chin, he like, like the master of destruction, so he'll take, like, that Ferrari and destroy it. What? What? So I stayed at his house.

Why does he destroy it? That's what he does. What do you mean? He's a wild boy. He takes, like, he'll take a Tesla truck and, like, he's a piece of shit and, like, rip it apart and destroy it.

wait a minute i i do not understand that just for views yeah he does a bunch of shocking shit trolls people wow okay but i stayed at his house um his whole compound the kids just kill it super creative kid does it all himself monster amazing monster super monster but so anyway i know so all of us came together right all the the the the truck boys all of us came together jack too look at the kid Not, no one called us a diesel jacked. That guy, that guy next to him.

Oh, that guy next to him. Okay, sorry. No, he's a small slender kid. But, so I came with them. You know, like, those are my guys. I came with them, but I don't, I didn't know anybody that was going to be there. You know, so I had anxiety. I'm like, I'm fucking, this weirdo in the corner and all that stuff. What would you say that about yourself?

I don't know that. What do you mean a weirdo? I don't fucking know those people. Don't say that stupid shit. You know what I'm, those are my people. You're not a weirdo in the corner. fucking weirdo like that's a weirdo thing to say you go i'm weirdo you're so fucking weirdo you're so fucking weird standing like with your legs where i'm too tall shut the fuck well no because

those guys are as big as well fit in bro fit in right now i fit it you let me finish fuck guys you're making me mad i fit in because cletus is bigger than me fine sparks is fucking big but anyway i get there and it was like uh if i die and go to heaven it's probably gonna look like this because theo's soon i see theo i's still chin on shop show it was like Forrest Gump and Jenny, we literally just sprinted toward each other. We're like jumping around. I talked to him, we haven't seen each other a hot second. That's cool. We talk, but we haven't seen each other, you know? So me and Theo were just the whole night dude. So him and Candace Owens are super close. Her kids call him Uncle Theo. I was telling Chin, Theo's an uncle to, like

my kids call him Uncle Theo. Rogan's daughters call him Uncle Theo. He's an uncle to a ton of people. He's the best uncle in the world. So my kids call him Uncle Theo. So Candice's kids call him Uncle Theo. They live close to each other so he's over there for dinner and shit and always hanging out with him dude the shit he was saying to fucking me kandis owens because we were talking about cash patel and i was like yeah i don't trust him because his eyes right we're all laughing and then theo goes yeah heavy on the fbi's right just clowning dude bro the i can't say it on there the shit he was saying around canis i was like oh my god they must be super close because if you weren't friends they would be in so much trouble yeah that's why you like

he just fucking he's on with all the time so then i'm with probably is he friends with cash no no no no no no um so then so me and theo are doing our thing bring him's there from ways to well so we're all hanging out the uh who i'm trying to think colby was there coming then um trying to think of the ufc guys there there's a few but then jelly roll comes in so then jelly roll so tucker comes in right and then there's a big commotion And then jelly roll comes in, even bigger. You forget how big jelly roll is now. He's the Adele for white men.

That's right. He's our Adele, right? So he comes in and shuts the party down. He's our Adele. He's our Adele with face tattoos. Dude, so he comes in and right away, I'm like, holy fuck he's skinny. But I just see him, I'm like, I'll get to him. But I'm talking to Theo, Tucker, everyone's around him, Bon Jovi, everyone's around

him. And I see him look over and goes, in front of everyone goes, Mother fucking Brendan's job. And then we just fucking tackle each other in the middle of the fucking party. so then it was me jelly theo just the boys man fucking around all night dude and jelly lives like eight minutes from there really yeah and he's so thin now i went what do you i went what are you doing paula i get i get getting in shape you can't get you can't get skinny guy that we can't have you skinny guy right have to no no no no no no no no i think he was hunting recently he's here

he's doing what he'll be here on wednesday he's not here right now okay yeah he'll be in austin on wednesday Yeah. Yeah, I'll see him on Wednesday. We'll try and get him here on Wednesday. That'd be nice. Yeah. I had such good. You know me, I don't like going out. I hate fucking leaving the compound. I'm glad I did. I'm glad I did. Of course, man. You got to make that connection. You forget, right? Because it's really easy to isolate, but you got to just resonate different. I just do my thing, but it's good to see everybody. But you'll love this. I won't say who it is. I won't say who it is. They introduced me as I love, I love him. I love him. He's retarded. I'm like, excuse me? He goes, yeah, man, retarded shit, man. Huh, right?

I was kind of offended. I'm like, this motherfucker retarded. He's like, yeah, I mean, we all just a bunch of retards. That's why we get along, man. We're all retarded. And I'm like, okay. And I was kind of like, what the fuck is he talking about? He's like, we're just a bunch of retards.

We think different, man. We get to heaven. It's going to be filled with retards. And I'm like, right, right, right. And everyone's like, eating it up. I'm like, this fucking, that's so disrespectful. And then someone way smarter than all of it. you know, Candice, he goes, get over here, retard.

I'm like, oh, that's just his thing. Yeah. He's not calling me retarded. It's a term of endearment. Yes. He's like, get over here, retarded. Well, that's like, I always say. Heavy on the R, dude, all the time.

You said, we'd be like, he's an idiot. We're all idiots. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah, I don't know this guy that well. Oh, you don't know that one. Oh, not at all. It was, oh, yeah, and because they go, hey, you know, brand chug, was, yeah, I love that retardant.

I was like, excuse me. And then I was kind of, you know, I was already kind of little... Yeah, yeah, yeah. In my head about things. You say who it is? No. And I was like, re-the-fuck? And they're like, yeah, we're all retarded, man.

I'm retarded, shit. Wait, just for a second, because I'm dying to know who it is. Anyway. Yeah, man. It was funny, though. I was like, retire. It was just a good time, good people. Good people.

By the way, guys, we have Timmy No Break's coming in here. We're just doing a little catch-up. That's right. That's right. Dude, I had the best Saturday ever. It's my perfect Saturday. Because Tiger had his last termina of the year, the Grinch Christmas tournament, which is a big deal. He played on like this hybrid team of majors in AAA, so they put him on there.

He pitched basically a no hitter. I don't want to say a no hit because he gave up one hit and the first baseman should have made the play. It was an error. So I guess that counts against T. But he pitched three innings, six strikeouts. Good team. Should have pitched no hitter. But that one kid fucked it up at first base.

All good. Accents happened. But T ball. Then Saturday. So T. I'm in a great mood. T's in a great mood. And then Saturday night, you got UFC pay-per-view.

Dude, when this travel baseball, it's only like an hour from the house. And then I know that night we have a major UFC pay-view. Especially that fight. Buddy, it is. It's a good time. It's- If someone said your perfect weekend, that's it.

Were you surprised at the Peter Jan Marab fight? Because I was talking to a guy who knows better who said, hey. Who's this guy who knows better? He knows better. and he said he goes he said something he goes

Peter Jan is going to beat Marab I said why he goes because he's just as good a wrestler and he's a way better striker and the last fight he had he had broken his hand but he needed the money the last fight when he fought Marab

yeah and I watched that fight and I went interesting Maraub said that oh I'm sorry Jan said that that's my thing with these guys like at that level like aspirin these

when they say they're hurt they're not like I can believe them, man. No one's like such a cop out. Oh, you're hurt. Who says that? What idiot says that? Like, believe it.

Every fan. It drives me nuts. Even Dana. It's like people that don't fight, man, when a guy like Peter Yon or Tom Ashton, when they work this hard and they say, I was hurt. Trust me. Trust me. They were fucking hurt.

Really hurt, too. I think with Yon, it's a, yeah, it was compared to on the shop show to the Holly Home thing. So when Holly Home got into the UFC, her only goal. Literally, her only goals to beat Rhonda Rousey. So in training camp, she fought good girls, but her, in training camp, even fighting other opponents, was to beat Rhonda. So she was doing the work to beat her opponent, but the focus was still on Rhonda. So she was adding things that it might work against this opponent, but really this is

for Rhonda down the road. So you'll see she would let things go on a little longer. She'd let girls get inside. That's all just to beat Rhonda. It's brilliant. Sure. Peter Yon's exact same thing. That's right.

That's right. Exactly. So he was fighting Figuero, these other cats, but the whole game plan and what he was doing was to beat the champ and Marab. This is what's crazy about fucking what, people don't realize this, what he did. Most people, when they lose the belt, he's younger than Mara, but when most people lose the belt, they'll fight right away. They might get it back.

The odds aren't good. When you lose the belt and then basically four years later get it back is unheard of. it's insane how tough that is right it's fucking wild dude it's it but so i and that fight this is the problem that fight wasn't close right that was 5045 that's right if you score that any other way he's face it wasn't touch my mouth yeah he would he would get touched but people don't realize we with a box on that level most of it's catching his gloves and if you are hitting his face it's it's it's it's he's just outside you don't have a mark in his face not a mark but also what you got to realize is marab is not gifted as far as striking

or grappling. Yeah. His grappling is good. It's his cardio. It's his cardio, so it's this relentless pace. Yes. But it's not a, you wouldn't say like, Hamzot has world class grappling, right? It has world.

Alex Pierre has world class striking. That's a good point. But, but Marab's thing, if you have to like pick something where you're like, what is he better at anybody out? You wouldn't say grappling. You wouldn't say submission. It's his, it's his motor. It's his motor.

You wouldn't say boxing. You wouldn't say his footwork. None of it. He just has this gift with his motor. so even if it's uh the shots of five out of ten it's coming 30 fucking times eventually he's going to get you that's how he beat you you take that away and then you're forced to strike with a world class boxer you're so fucked you're so fucked and oh and he can wrestle and i was about to say so i had known like two years ago people who know again better who trained with him and

were you know said with yon yeah they were like oh his wrestling is world class and i was like what And they go, oh, he. He's done since he's a kid. Oh, dude. And he hangs out with high level wrestlers. Yeah, all the guys do. I don't care about that. But his boxing, his ability, his understanding of where to place his feed.

The other thing they were saying was like, dude, he's so good, so fucking good. Like, they were like, he's the champ. And they were saying that in 2021. Well, he was the champ. But then he lost three in a row. Right. But remember, he got fucked over with sugar fight. Most people had him beaten sugar.

But that's what I'm saying is like he lost three. And then the Aljo, so you got the sugar, which most of us think he won. Aljo, you're like, Jesus Christ, he did a knucklehead thing, right? Yep. And then he lost him a rab, got some beat by him around, but he was injured. And lost Aljo on the rematch. Didn't he play, fight Aljo twice? No, remember Aljo, kicked him when he was down.

Yeah. Yeah, man, I mean, but his, he's just so good, man. He's so fucking good. Everyone kind of wrote him off because when he used to do it in a row, it's like, it's probably over the hill. That's right. And then he just kept working. That's why it's so impossible.

So the people I was talking to him, especially one guy was like, oh, everybody wrote him off because he lost three in a row. Yeah. He goes, they were like, he's going to beat Maraub. And I was like, the reason you can, I was telling Chin this too on the shop, when you can tell a high-level striker, especially a guy who's been doing along, the jab. Everything starts and finishes with the jab. But see, so if you watch most strikers that the MMA community say, oh, they're elite, they have no jab. It's all, it's all head hunting at all times. And they get it done.

but a high level guy if you has a good jab he fucked Maraba What did the damage was that jab That's what people don't realize Yeah Here's the other thing Like I like to strike

And I box and stuff But I can't see what he's doing Like there's a subtle thing Hold on Let me just make sure everything's good It's a subtle thing right It's like there's a there's a There's a subtlety

To understanding what he's doing Because it's a game of inches It's a whole setup Yeah If you don't know that Like I I try to see what it is I can't see it

It's really too subtle right for us for the average unless you're a fighter fighter and you understand boxing and strike i knew right right when i saw that jab land i'm like oh marab's so fucked jesus you did oh yeah i'm like he's so just when the jab's there it's going to mess up all the timing and then also again if you're just a casual watch it or even if you do a little wrestling the way yon was he knew what marab's tendencies were because there's so much footage on marab so when he gets your back and you run you to the cage he had all answers for all that. So he would go to the cage and then not let him get positioned and turn in and then

take him down. Yes. So all of it was just for this. Yeah, because Marab shoots that inside single and sometimes does that knee pick with the, with the neck, you know, but, but it's not like, it's not like intricate. There's, there's that. And then he's, then he gets your back and he's a nightmare. He's getting a million times. Yeah. Notice he didn't let him get his back. It's not that chain wrestling that Kabib or Machjeev have where they just, they'll go from one moot to me like trips, you know, all kinds of shit. That's a different, it's a different skill. Marab, it's just like, it's, it's almost like shooting a 22 instead of a bazook. Yes.

It's just, you do it enough, you're going to get them. Yes. Instead of that one shotgun, boom, like a Hamzad or Kabib. Yeah.

Yeah. Or a mock chef. Let me. Be, let's take a little break here, man, because fall weather changes fast, hot, cold,

wet, windy, especially out here in Austin. Yeah. Sometimes all in one little shift. And that's why true work is performance work wheel built like it matters because it does. Dude,

I was wearing my true work jacket all weekend and I'm telling you the quality of that company is unmatched. They have 50,000 five-star reviews. Is that what you're talking about? 50,000. Think about that. Dude, and I have their workwear pants like the khaki pants. I wore them yesterday. It was freezing outside at my son's baseball game. They're the best. All right, the absolute best. Upgrade your day with work will built like it matters. Get 15% off your first order at TrueWork. That's T-R-U-E-W-R-K.com with the code fighter that's true work dot com

this is cool I feel like I'm in a you are I feel like a minute I feel like I'm in a what are you been doing what are you been doing we're looking to

podcast just fucking trying to get sleep running around yeah I'm doing uh where was that was in L.A. Where you're at

a big L.A. I did I did Adam Ray's podcast and I did I did some meetings I was at the Paramount lot just trying to pitch a show I was like I have no fucking

idea of what Hollywood bro dude I'm a big Hollywood guy no I didn't I knew me when I was just a boy I knew you when you were a boy now you're a big no no I'm a big Hollywood I almost canceled this I was just like enjoy that that's a fun process enjoy that yeah no it's it's nothing it's like my friends like all the rage now in film everybody wants you know he's like I'm meeting with Ron Howard and everybody and I'm like he's had these two short films that were all the thing and I just I've been I've been around so long I was like how's that going he goes good because so we're going to get the financing we just got to get somebody

attached I go I go enjoy enjoy that in the meantime you're going to be directing my my my fucking commercials which it takes a while but you got to shoot you don't want to me just of course you do but i'm saying in the meantime make your money over here but also it's i'm not you know like they'll they'll say oh yeah this is great like i want to do that and i'm cautiously optimist if it works out great but then also yeah i'm not expecting also hollywood shuts down from thanksgiving to fucking mid-january oh they literally shut down but they're gone i'm not saying you're not going to fucking book something. I mean, I, dude, I'm, I'm just cautiously optimistic. That's my, that's my, that's my, that's my

no, keep fucking shooting for the moon, dude. Shoot for the moon. Let's see what happens, bud. You keep coming up with ideas. Keep, keep doing, keep doing you, man. But yeah, torn, torn a lot. Are you? Yeah, just like trying to. He went to jerse and they want to see him be. Timmy no breaks. Where were you at Stress Factory? Where were you at? Most recently, I did a run of the improv, so I did San Jose to Oxnard to Brea. Brea was huge, huge, right? That was 600 fucking, I mean, I didn't, I didn't, I sold well, but I didn't like get 600. It was crazy.

It's a big, yeah, I think it's the biggest improv. It's the biggest improv for sure. I shot my special there. Oh, you did? Yeah, I shot two specials there. Not false gods was comedy mothership, right? That was comedy mothership, but the one before that was Braya. Dude, Brea is the best.

And I, no, I shot one at Irvine. in improv you were at that one and then i was uh san jose also that's like a theater yeah that's like a movie theater right it's literally it's i was like i i look at the marquee i'm like holy fuck yeah the man the man was you at san jose i imagine imagine like for the first time like seeing your name yeah like outside something on like a marquee like that you're like well not really my name but you know i was just like holy fuck it's dope yeah i took a picture i was just like god damn you had a you had a meteoric kind of rise yeah six months You know, he's been creative.

He's been, he owned his own marketing company, what I'm doing, and, uh, and he was really successful at it, like so. And you're, homes where? You're originally from where? San Diego. Oh. So I started in San Diego. Fuck.

For nine months. I would not have guessed that. Yeah. You thought New York. You thought it was a big New York. She went Timmy, so I wore this. Whatever you want to do? Whatever you guys want.

And where, where Timmy come from? Uh, open mic with my buddy. just started talking in New York accent being like, you don't know what a punchline is? What's going on? It's just funny stuff. And then just saying really not funny stuff and just yelling at people at this open mic,

you guys don't understand comedy. That's what the fucking problem with you guys. And then just, you know, 30 seconds turned into... When you're on stage, are you doing Timmy No Breaks? Are you doing Timmy Stifler? I'm doing both. So I'm Timmy No Breaks and they do an impression of a generic white guy.

All right, let's go. Which allows me to do me. I told Brian, because he's like, do we want, oh, none of that's on air? It's on. But yeah, just let me know. It's on air. We can flip, we can flip in.

Well, I was, what, Brian was like, is he going to be himself or you want Tommy no breaks? I'm like, maybe a combo of both, because you don't want to do a full hour just of viewing character. I've done it. I've done it like that. I've done it. But you're not even from New York.

You're not even from New York, Tim. It's Jersey. I'm a Jersey boy. Because on Kill Tony, he was like, where are you from? And I forgot New York. I just, I just, like blurted out new jersey and that solidified so fucking dude i was i did shows in like a bar

in the makeshift bar in hoboken like three shows and people were just like yeah so i know you're you know you don't sound like that but where in jersey are you from and like in the beginning i was like oh i'm from san diego and then i was like hoboken right here right people people were just like what dude what you're fucking lied to me but it literally was so funny it was just like a split second thing of just people like, Jersey, yeah, you're up there. You're up there and you're like, you don't know what's going to come out of your. And where was the first

your first big break on Kill Tony? Where was that at? That was a Vulcan. You did the sushi joke, didn't you there? No, that was the second one. So Vulcan, yeah, so basically the the way the whole thing started like in terms of like an act, like the joke, which is now the worst part for sure. But in the beginning,

it was doing well. I don't know why. But it was just me being like just doing a lawn setup and being like, bitch, I got bills to pay. And then nobody will laugh and be like, what the fuck? Guys,

this is great A shit. What the fuck is going on? And just going back to yelling at people for not laughing at something that is objectively not funny. It's not a punchline to be like, I had bills to pay. That was doing well.

So that was it. And so I did that on for the minute. And then the minute bombed, obviously. Yeah. Because I'm just doing that. Everybody's like, fuck is going on. Then Tony's like, you know, Sam stealing dice or whatever. And then,

and I kind of knew who was going to say that. And so then it was just, I was just, I had nothing to lose. And like, you know, if somebody goes on does a character, particularly that character bombs in the minute, they're going to give up on it right away. But I was like, oh, I have nothing to lose. I'm just, I'm doubling down. He's like, who are you like? And I'm like, you know, and he's just saying all this stuff. He's like, how old are you? And I'm like, 18, because I knew he was going to ask that. I'm 18 years old. He's like,

how old are you, Timmy? I'm like, 24. And he's like, really? I'm like, how dare you? How fucking old are you? He's like, how old are you?

I'm like, I'm like, 24 years old. He's like, I'm like, guys, I'm a guest here. Like, you know, just like,

just like, just like came out of me because it was so, I was so upset in the character. Your instincts are right on because Hoboken, I lived in Hoboken. I lived in Hoboken for almost three years.

And in the 90s, like the early 90s, because I was working at a bank so I would take the ferry over to Wall Street. You know, take the ferry across. Hating life. Bro, you have no idea.

But living in Hoboken back then, it was Italian, and it had been Puerto Rican, and it was still Puerto Rican, but it was also Italian, old school Italian, like the old school delis. But those old school Italian, dude, do you want to talk about aggression, big, strong guys?

There was a club, I remember, I never forget, I was going on this club right in Hoboken, and there's a dude who was wearing just a blazer with no shone. shirt underneath just a blazer jacked out of his mind nobody batted an eye that's how he dressed on a saturday night and please understand please understand you can get punched in the face so quickly by just staring at a guy a little too long like it should be yeah but not anymore though

it's it's definitely no no no it's not there's right it's like brookly it's like it's all the yuppies all the yuppies moved there i went back and i was like pronouns right even even when ardy lang was living there and I did a podcast with him. I went to his house and I was I was like I didn't recognize just because it was well it's because all the all these young Wall Street kids move there they change it yeah so it's like you know when when Tony says it's a take off of dice would it would well I mean I was like it's a version kind of like died well no I think I think like after the after the first one I got you know why people why people were saying that and stuff like that because like you know it kind of is like a bit of a parody and stuff but then

Jacket, I guess. Yeah, and it's like, it's like, you know, I understand now, to think that now, I think you have to have a pretty low IQ, which, no offense to like the Kill Tony audience, but like some of them, some of them are really dumb. Where they can't, they can't get over it? Yeah, some people will be, I think almost everyone, like, it seems like most people are like, oh, no, he's doing his own thing. Correct.

You know, like, whatever, but there will still, yeah, I mean, you guys know, hate. I have questions about that. what do you got oh please what what why why do you guys hate someone like why do you guys get all this hate yeah yeah yeah what's been around for 14 years so whatever and so what and then how do you deal with that like what don't you just like fuck it at at this one no no we shouldn't say we don't because i think forever like you get advice from like rogan bigger dogs and you're like just ignore all of it just don't and there's that aspect of it you don't want to like read all the comments nonstop but like with the redid group we have now it's like like you know

Nick Simmons he's like man I think you guys should like shine some light on it some like it's this elephant in the room like it's not a bad thing there's actually some really funny stuff on there now there's some creative there's there's in that reddit group started off as a as a fucking you know they were big fans of the show yeah somehow got infiltrated and there's there's some evil people if you look at the kill tony subreda it's the same thing it's evil but like you can't let the the few evil people dictate all of it You know what I'm saying? Like, you get more love than hate.

I'm sure you get hate. Oh, for sure. And it's, but to me and like, look, you know, I'm a sensitive guy. Like, you know, can hurt my feelings and stuff like that. 18. 36. I'm fucking 18. But in real.

I'm 24 years old. I'm 70. I've had my face pulled back in a ponytail. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of work. Have you been famous for six months? Yeah, I wouldn't even call it famous. Well, you know, but I'm saying you've hit people's radar in the past six months.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it was nothing. So the hate, it doesn't, it doesn't get less. Oh, more successful you get. Oh, for sure. Like, Tony gets a ton of hate, right? He's very famous. A ton. No one gets more hate than Joe Rogan, very famous.

So it's like, it comes with the territory. Oh, for sure. It just comes with the territory. For sure. I see, I see hate right now. Because, like, when I've gone on that show, for the most part, I've done well, I'm like, I feel good about, I feel good about, like, what I've done. The time, and inevitably, there will be a time where it just doesn't

go as well. I'll probably, like, if people hate on that, I'll probably feel bad, but now when like people, like, just like somebody just out of pocket will be like, this fucking sucks, it's funny to me. Like, it's not, it's not, it's, it's, it doesn't suck. It was good. For me, when I came along, I was already older than everybody. So this whole social media thing was so new. And I also came from a culture and a time where self-promotion was a bad word. Like, like, like, the idea that I was going to, remember when Rogan was like, dude, a huge part of your job is Twitter and I was like and you know and gaming the system like you know and I was like I don't I just can't do it it was so against maybe just the way I grew up or whatever it just I and so for me

I never knew any like the Reddit thing I swear to God I've never I didn't know what exists my wife was like it's in the hundreds of thousands or something and I was like what is and she's like there's a whole fighter in the kid subreddit which I had actually no idea about until it was coming after him to that extent. But the more you look into it, like, they have some valid well, that's what I'm saying is like, like when they're like, that was the point I was going to make. Yeah, they're like, the show used to be fun.

You guys gotten so political. And that's on me and Brian. Like, during COVID, like, it was a tough time. And like, we were pissed off living in California, man. Yeah. The show did get very political. But your audience doesn't want to see that. They don't want to hear you brag.

They don't want to hear you fucking talk about your political opinion. They're here for comedy to be a, and they want you to be a jackass. They have a valid point. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you guys should have like a section of the podcast. where you just like read the meanest the meanest that's why nick that's why nick comes in that's what he does i've never been afraid you should you should totally do that you should just like

acknowledge it and stuff like that correct just be like fuck you but i do that sometimes when i'll post a video and we'll do these like we'll read the video i mean the comments on and it's fucking hilarious yeah they're just some of them are just so over the top meme that it's funny yes it's just so preposterous you know what's funny okay so i two years ago somehow like i i think i like was, I don't know, like I pulled up Gringo Poppy again or something. I wrote a comment two years ago defending you. Oh, brother. Randomly. I was like, I was like lit up. No, nobody like it was, it was just because it didn't, I was like watching again. I'm like, this isn't like that it's, is it the best stand up special? No, but like it made no sense the level of hate that it was getting.

Some of it. It was like they were jokes, you know, like so. And I've only been doing it like, you know, not that long. But the thing, but the issue is to give some of them. is like when I went on Schultz's show and he's like you know they're talking about the special he's like you know it's not bill a bill burr special and then I went whoa hold on but nobody in here is so if you're if you're holding me to that standard because I hang out with bill I hang with Brian or hang it with Joey Diaz or Rogan that and or Theo and Chris my best friends are great comics but just because I hang out with them I stuff a long ways you go but because we're doing shows together and podcast together people like no you got to be at their standard

yeah now to the credit too is Like, I don't know, like you're doing, like, you've been, how long have you been doing standup, though? Stan, so it was an improv guy, but standup I'm coming up on three years. Okay, so now, so you're, you're fairly new. So imagine. Very new. Yeah, so was I. But imagine two years into it, showtime comes to you and gives you a big paycheck.

I tried to talk them out of it. Yeah, yeah. Did people try to talk at you out of it? Yeah, oh, yeah. What made you, what made you decide to be like, all right, I'm, was it, was it, was it the money mostly or was it? No, I always do my own thing. Like, because I knew I'd get hate from it, but it's like, this is a good opportunity and it's just what I'm going to do. He should have listened, but he, you were a little cocky.

That's all that's, you were young. You were young and you, you had that, you have a lot of confidence, but also arrogance in that sense in that time. Like, we all, our biggest strength is a lot of times our biggest weakness. He's kind of fearless and I've always loved that about him. Like, he's truly fearless. Like, he'll do anything. I got, dude, I was putting him in front of style. You fuck a guy?

Depends. Just pause. Pause. Sounds pretty afraid to me. Sounds kind of like a bit of a pussy for not fucking a guy. Sounds like a pussy. Sorry, sometimes it comes out. It's okay.

It's okay. I just met this guy. He's a fucking pussy for not fucking a guy. You should see the stuff that, have you heard of this stuff acting off, the show acting off? Yeah, Brian does it. It's the best gay show.

It makes Kill Tony look like a fucking heterosexual event. It's amazing. It's all gay. It's so funny. It always turns out to be gay. Literally, literally like we'll joke about it. And then it's like, okay, first, first exercise, you have to give me a lap dance.

And we're like, what the fuck? You're like, who wrote this Brian's a guy? Did he, Chris O'Connor. Chris O'Connor. He didn't know what the fuck. He's a man. Yeah. He's like, what the fuck?

He's like a small guy, but he is a man. He's not a guy. He's on the cross. He's kind of a movie. Literally the first, the first thing is we have to give Brian a lap dance. And Chris was like, what the fuck? Yours? And then everything is just, and then everything is, you dance.

You might have to do it as an actor. They just see everything with you and Nick. It just, it's so gay. I know, and Chris is doing this. I mean, Chris O'Connor is like, he's like, I'm going to fucking kill myself. We were talking about it at SkangFest, just laughing so hard. Well, that's like I had Chaleson and Dustin Porier,

and I wrote a thing for, we did this commercial, and they had to, the idea was they had to sing and dance. And that was an issue. We had to have a conversation. Some guys are just like, I'm not fucking doing, I'm not singing and dancing. Yeah. You do a lot of gay shit.

It's a sense of humor. It's essentially, I like, I like joking about, like, whenever I text with you, we'll be like, yeah, I'm just sending me my dick or something. Yeah, it was some gay boy. How about the, do you see what he posted? It is, it is really. But every day? Did you see what, you feel us might just be gay?

Did you see what Timmy posted after I, after I mentioned him on Rogan? Chin, bring up, bring up, where would he post it? Go to Timmy, no breaks. Instagram? It's everybody, everybody, uh, thinks that I made the AI of you saying, like, because I was, I was like i don't want to just post a clip that just kind of feels i don't know so funny so i i bring up how good he is on on acting off and uh yeah timmy no rogan yeah yeah no rogan he does acting off by the way oh i'm sure he's timmy dude that dude is he'll just come up

with shit out of him and payton run it will fucking and danny martinella they'll hit you with shit and we're just like holy fuck and that's wednesday night at what time Oh, I love this. I got how old to have now. Whoever made that is so fucking good. And then so good. Just out of nowhere. I made that.

I made that. You made that? Yeah, obviously. He goes. I thought you were just reposting. No, no, no, no, no. I reposted the clip, but I wanted to be. I do this dumb AI stuff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's fun. Got a shout out on Joe Rogan's parents from my dad, Brian Callan. Be sure to check out. Dude, that's so good. Yeah, it's a little gay if you post the clip. Yeah, I just, I don't know. I don't know.

I always try to, like, make it. Like, I started doing this thing before things popped off where, you know, like, people just post stand-up clips and, you know, my clips, my stand-up isn't, like, good enough to just go viral on its own. And so I was like, okay, I'm going to start, like, adding AI to every clip. And so I just started to do it.

and then uh and then i did with the kill tony stuff and like some people hate it you know some people are like fucking stop doing it but i think it's so funny you're fucking creative i think it's so funny i just started doing that one that one's so good yeah that one that one that one i'm i'm happy with that one's for sure um so joe rogan knows who i am yeah well i guess that's crazy yeah isn't that crazy it's just crazy you just got you just got uh passed the mothership i did you heard about that yeah did i tell you no he works there no bro i know things about me god damn yeah i uh you heard about that yeah he works there bro yeah what do you do there i uh put the phones in uh i put the phones in the i put the phone in the

pouches yeah and then i take the time take him out of the pouches aren't yeah well i take i take i do the magnet too okay cool it's good money you're that guy just got passed so adam saw a bunch of your sets uh didn't i don't think he's ever seen i i so so the way that you normally get pass right is you do this mic and stuff like that by the way joe not to call joe out but i have to like there's one open mic there's not two like they went from two he still thinks there's too there's one he's a busy guy i love that guy never met him probably my best friend but there's there's one open mic so it's it's my the only reason i'm bringing it up is is mondays is it's you know it's very hard to get on that mic it's very hard my boy nick simmons can't get past yet

He's a beast. Yep. And it's hard to get on the mic. It's really hard to get a callback. And then if you get a call back, you might do a bunch and then never get past. It's just, it's extremely competitive, rightfully so, whatever. It should be, yeah. And so I couldn't even get on the mic, really.

And so I stopped signing up. And then Tony asked if I, like, last second, big, big tone move, asked me if I wanted to do a guess. spot i guess on his show and um like tony and friends yeah like a tony and friends and i had no idea adam was there just kind of you know went on and did my thing i guess and then he was there and he just like walked out afterwards and he was like hey you want to start calling in and i was like this is and they asked like it's on i was like what does that mean you know calling he's like you just got past and i'm like oh that's so cool yeah it's so cool you call your mom and dad uh i think so it's a big

deal to me and they're like what is the comedy movie do they not get it i was like i've told you about this place do they not get in of it? They, uh, got it as soon as I did MSG. Um, that's when they got it. That's when they were like, all right. This is kind of, that was like, it's going to be on Netflix. And they're like, all right. All right. Yeah. Be, let's take a little break here because it's the gift given season, dude. And dude, I got some for all you Scrooge McDucks out there. All you grinches, here's the gift you're going to want to do. It's super easy. We're talking about aura. All right. ORA frame. Listen, you get unlimited free photos and videos. You just download the ORA app and connect

to Wi-Fi, you can upload the pictures. If you have kids, this is the best gift for any dad. This is all I want. I just want pictures of my kids. I don't need any gifts. I need pictures of my kids. You can personalize your gift. You can share them, personalize it. Gift box included. Every frame comes packaged in premium gift box with no price tag. Think of it like a frame on your thing. And you can just, pictures keep changing, right? I mean, the videos, pictures, whatever it might be. Instead of having just one picture, you just have like it's kind of on a rotation. It's like the Roll it X. You know when you think you passed away because your iPhone shows you like back in time videos like picture and you're like, oh, this is a funeral. It's like that, but

it's positive. All right? You and I have, you and I have like, did I die? We'll get these things like. It'd be like flashback from a fighter and the kid. Memories from 2013. I'm like, oh, did I die? Right. But this is opposite of that because this is a great gift. So for limited time, save on the perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com to get $35 off oras best selling Carver Matt Frames, named number one by wirecutter, by using the promo code Fighter at checkout. That's A-U-R-A-Frames.com, promo code Fire. This deal is exclusive to the Firend Kid fans, and the frames sell out fast, so get on it. So, we're yours right now in time for the holidays.

Support the show by mentioning, we sent you. Terms and conditions apply. oraframes.com. Dude, when I was in freaking Franklin, Tennessee, it was freezing out there, and I look around. I have my brunt work wear boots on. I look at Diesel Dave, he has the brunt hat, jacket boots on. Damn. I look at Dave Sparks. He has the exact same stuff on. I'm like, oh, we're all brunt boys. Everyone's rocking brunt. One, two, three, brunt. Yeah, we got options, but the reason is we choose brunt because it's fantastic. They are the best boots you will ever

buy. Well, it's for real. It's real hardworking tradesmen. That's what it's for. People actually like actually work with their hands and stuff yeah and brunt stands behind what they make you can wear them to work if they're not right for you you can send them back it's a no risk gift that people are going to love them i guarantee this is the best gift you can give any dad any dude that's out there doing anything worthwhile these are the perfect boots you want your dad brother everything they offer a full range of high performance gear for tough jobs personally i don't do a tough job but i like to look like i do a tough job you know what i'm saying I like to look like I have rough hands.

So why not deck myself out in front? Do it, bro. With attempts dropping the holidays coming up, it's time to treat yourself or the hardworking bro in your life to real comfort, skip the throwaway gifts, don't waste your money, get Brunt Workwear, it lasts.

And you guys get a $10 off your entire order with Fighter at checkout. That's bruntworkware.com. Use the code Fighter. That's B-R-U-N-T Workware.com. Use the code Fighter. Order today and let them know we sent you. because like Brian was saying like I had an ad agency like I was pretty successful in advertising

worked my ass off for six years to make it you know to pay ourselves well and whatever and then just one day it was like I'm leaving and that's an objectively insane thing to do it's a insane thing I'm 36 years old I'm leaving this thing that I've just committed my entire life to I work so hard on it and I'm leaving right when it's like really, you know, getting successful and I'm just like, I just can't do it anymore and then I started doing stand-up. What couldn't you do about it?

It just was to be... It's just like, you know, when you... Okay, so imagine like you were, you had to go back to your finance job. I got to go fucking crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just like going, like, you know, you love stand-up or you love what you're doing or whatever,

and then you have to show up and do this thing you hate. You just, you know, I still, I could never do it. I had to do the thing I wanted to do. As you get older, you start to, like, I look back on shit and, like, that's how I felt about acting. I hate to say it. Like, for me, being on a set, waking up early, doing all, that's because it's different because it's a live performance, right?

It's an improv show, basically. Acting off is the best, but, but, like, in, when I would be on set and you're, you're, there at 5.30 in the morning, you're in the makeup chair, you're waiting around all day. You're there for 16 hours. You know, I can't complain to people. I was on a TV show. I'm not going to, but I would complain to him to Rogan. I'd be like, I fucking, like, I love the people I work with, but I don't like having

to show up and be in there for 16 hours doing nothing. I go fucking crazy. I want to do that way it's like? You just show up, you sit and then they bring. You will wait. And then you will wait some more. I think it's cool if you're like Batman, though. You know, if you're making like 40 mil?

You want to see Batman? Watch this. I'm telling you how they shoot. I would so be Batman. Bubba. You got all this. stuff on. I'm in. And you come in and you, you come in and you just sit down like this. Yep. And then you go, how much? Something happens. You know, you get, oh,

you're cut. Fuck. You got to do that. Try it again. You got to keep, because the lights here, so you got to keep your head here. Your head was here. Okay, I got it. Yeah, but I'd have my assistant. I go, how much are I getting paid? It doesn't. After a while, but if that's your life, if you're doing a movie, they shoot one page a day. Yeah. They shoot a page a day. Think about it. a page a day and that means you will do or you'll just do this you'll go you'll the your scene will be to listen and you will just do this what do what do you what do you do you do in your in your downtime on set i'm glad you asked rebooks i would look at guys you look at guys fucking you look at guys you look at guys you have guys come in that you paid who don't speak

english professionals you do whatever you have to do you rub them down an oil you Do whatever the fuck you can. What do you have to do that? Huh? What do you have to do that as an actor? Why do you have to be gay? Because it helps because it's a gay industry. Because you're wearing makeup.

You know what I'm saying? And you might have to play a character that fucks guys or gets fucked. Does that make sense? Would you prefer to play? So your method, so that's how you became gay. Yes. Because you care about the crap. And you started to get fucked by guys.

Well, I had to make out with my best friend in a on stage. we've kissed on camera before we've kissed on camera what's going on where's the bit end you're not getting out of here oh no it's no it's no getting out of your mouth until we drink deeply of your mouth we're gonna drink deeply of your mouth damn it yeah that's right that's what happens you want to come to this warehouse and do this podcast you can park your car in here and you could be shut from behind not be able to get out this ain't a podcast bro yeah we're gonna fuck we're not even we're not even recording the kid we're not even record you could try to fight me off kid you're not going to be able to do it. I'm gonna get you. Yeah. I'm stoked. Yeah. So, so. Dude, I don't. Remember that show

queerest folk? Yeah, you were on that. I wasn't on it, but I, but I was not on it. Thank you. You wrote it. I did not write it. Yeah, it was a biography. That's a rumor. That's a rumor. Okay. It's a good rumor, but it's a rumor. Start it, keep it going. Don't let it stop. Fighter and the kid read it. Go off. It's not a rumor. Make it real. Get to the front page of Reddit. He's fucking gay. Make it real. folk writer and actor he made it happen very successful show biggest credit he would uh sit in a chair they'd redo the take all the time of him just being like oh oh oh and be like let me run it again they're

like we've done it 50 times he's like let me take it again i want to do it from the top let me suck this stick again and they're like it's not even a real dick and you're like yeah i know i'm upset about it i'm fucking upset i'm upset yeah and my agent sent me their sides and i had to make out with a guy And I think the line was I'm going to fuck you till your eyeballs roll back in your head something like that. And I was like, I call my agent and I go, I'm not homophobic, but I'm just telling you that I'll never

be this guy who wakes up and puts makeup on and then goes and makes out with a dude as my job no matter how famous like that. You want to do Brokeback Mountain? Probably not. Would you? Whoa. I never saw it so I don't know the extent that they went. But I think I think any any, me turning down apart

because I have to do gay shit is a reflection of my own insecurity right? Because it's like if these other like I don't want to do it but it's like if I'm looking at like the best actors like you go gay you'll win an Oscar you know. You will. Sean Penn, Tom Haynes. Yeah yeah

it's great. I just I don't know that all bullshit aside it'd be really hard for me to be good in that role. That's all I'm trying to say. I think you'd surprise yourself. I would. I've done it on stage. I could do it. Hey, you can do just fine. Hey. Don't act tough around Tommy. Hey. No, guys, it's fine. No, guys, at the end of the day, I'm not putting my lips on another

man's mouth unless you're going to pay me well. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, well, yeah. Right? I mean, you do it for free. Yeah. I mean, what do you mean? Don't show me with a little bit of money either. I'll do it for free or I'll do it for a lot of money. Define free because now you're using words. You're looking at me, you're looking at me for a long time. You haven't broken your gaze. And I understand this, there's a fucking, whoa. There's an energy between us.

God damn. God, damn. Oh, shit. Oh, wait, you're doing for me. God damn. I'm trying to, uh, hypnotist. I have another character I'm working on that's a deaf jam puppet. And I've just been in my apartment just fucking doing black scent.

Just imagine, imagine getting walked in on jerking off. And then imagine getting walked in on just screaming in black scent, which one is more embarrassing? Dude, let me hear it. It's, it's really bad. I can't. Let me see the character. All right, I'll give you a line. Please let me.

It's just say, um, where's, where are the refreshments? God damn. Where are the motherfucking refreshments in this bitch? I don't understand what's going on. This is motherfucking bullshit. See, it's, it's, it's, so that's the guy. The only part that I have that I'm happy with is God damn. And then it's just like, yeah.

Where are refreshments? Oh, hell no. Oh, hell no. Oh, hell no. This is motherfucker. And like the entire justification, okay, so there is, in my, mind a point to be made here and it's you know i shouldn't be making it i don't know why i'm making this hard on myself but yeah nobody talks like that but it's like it's like everybody like i see people

doing asian impressions indian impression like white guys yeah um every impression but like we don't really touch black people like we don't do we're afraid of it and i'm like well why that's not fair we should be making fun of everybody so i like kind of make that point and then like but i figured out a safe way to do it and then I bring out a puppet and I've duct taped a fucking you know microphone to him and I'm like this is the safe way to do it and they come out I'm like you know um what about I'm making that man fuck the police I got a DWB driving while black it's just like all this dumb shit and uh and it's crazy it's going to be part of your stand-up yeah imagine trying to work this out yeah I know so I was working

I worked it out and like, so I did a show like I did for the first time and I have had a piece of paper with like the shitty jokes on it. And I was just reading out. I'm like, I don't know the way to work this out. But I did a show and I, there are no black people that go to comedy in Austin. Like it's very, very small. They were, the audience was black and I'm like, oh, I'm like, I got it. I'm so insane that I'm like, okay, I have to do this.

And it didn't go well. That happens to me because I'm, writing all this is very racist i'm like don't do it don't do it but i then i just do it because you gotta yeah you got it if it makes me uncomfortable it kind of but all black but half black crowd you're like yeah it was the most black people i've ever seen anywhere i do a thing on a chinese piano player who's also a gangster don't ask but it's like and it took me a long now it's doing really well let's hear it let me hear a little time it a little sliver it's a long thing it's just do just do just do the voice i'm just no no no i don't do a chinese

What if it's your saying? I don't do a Chinese action. Oh, hell no. I just do these esoteric. Oh, hell no. These keys can't play to themselves. Yeah, I do these esoteric things about how he. See, it's like not cool that I'm doing it.

But if I have a puppet. Oh, hell no. Yeah. Oh, God. Oh, hell no. God, I can't see these keys for shit. I'm blind. Oh, he's blind.

Oh, no, no, he's deaf. He's dead. He's dead. I'm Ray Charles. I'm right. My name's Jeff Jair. I'm deaf. I can't hear you laughing because I'm deaf.

But he. I'm like the dead Stevie Wonder, but I do comedy motherfucker, let's go. Yeah, but if he's deaf, he's not going to talk like that. Oh, shit. Oh, hell no. Yeah, I can't fuck, man. That's stage two. Yeah, hit it, do a stereotype, well, deaf person who's black.

That's what I'm saying. Make sure you get yourself super canceled, but it'll make you bear. Yeah, yeah, man. Especially with Kill Tony audience, I think you'll be all right, Bubba. Oh, I think, I think with Kill Tony. Yeah, they're like, yes, that's it. Mosea N-word. It's just funny to do a deaf jam puppet is just funny.

I find it funny. To me, and so we'll see. We'll see. No, but you're right. So I think what you're dealing with is this is kind of a great thing about stand-up is you get an idea, right? And you're like, I think this is going to work. Like, I'll say that all the time.

Like this weekend, I was like, I have this whole idea about like Captain America. And I was like, that's, I know it's not, you're not getting it now, but in three months, this is going to crush. And it always does. just have to sit with it and come up with it and figure out what I'm trying to say. And it's the same thing. If you have an idea for a Def Jam puppet, I can promise you, it's going to be hilarious. I just, I already love it because you're excited about it.

And for whatever reason, you can't stop thinking about it. That's when you know it's going to be a good bit. I mean, you get canceled and you'll be back here, but it's so funny. I'm literally, it's going to be the fighter, the kid, and the Jew. And the Jew. And think about that. Guys, I literally just change your podcast. Nice

fucking Asian midget on there That's, can I say midget? That's chin Yeah, that's chin Chin That's just as small people Oops, okay So that's cool

That's great That's good Just met this guy Asian midget Well, you know You look taller in real life Yeah Chin's a giant

How's the dating life Going out you're famous? How's the dating life? It's better I guess I wouldn't say dating I would say like you know, like, you could hook up with more people, I would say.

More access. Yeah, and I care less, I guess. I care less. Yeah. What do you mean? You're made to the game right. I mean, like, I think I was, I think, you know, like, the thing about girls for me is, like, I love feeling validated, you know?

And, like, feeling like you're wanted by a woman makes you feel good, you know, sometimes maybe even more than just, like, hooking up, you know? and so now that like I get that more I'm like less motivated to just like you're sure as fucking not 24 talking like that Bubba yeah for sure yeah for sure but like I'm less motivated to just kind of like like so it's you know

like sometimes I'll just I'll just be like I don't like maybe I could hook up with somebody but I'll be like I don't know I just want to go to bed you know and I would have never been like that And it's not like I'm getting that, like, that sounds like I'm getting so much pussy, and it's not like that, but, um, you're growing up. But yeah, grown, growing up and, uh, but I, I think I'd like to date somebody. That's been harder to like find somebody like, really, I feel like, I feel like Austin is just

full of really hot girls in their late 20s and 30s. Yes, I don't approach woman, though, that I'm interested in. You don't approach. No, I'm still like a, I'm a 36, like, I'm the, like, I'm the, like, I'm the opposite Timmy No Breaks. Yeah. When it comes to pussy, I'm a pussy. Yeah.

I'm not Brennan shop, you know. I'm not putting out a Showtime special two years in. I'm taking my time. I don't advise that. Yeah. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah, but you know, sometimes just like, I feel like Austin where you can just go up and go, hey, how you doing?

Yeah. But I know what you mean. Yeah, I'm just, I'm just never, yeah. I need to get, I would like to get there at some point, maybe in my 50s or 60s, but. Like, it happened, though. I don't think you need to worry about it. I don't think you need to worry about it. I don't think it'd be playful.

You're going to meet a southern bell? No, I think, no, I have, but if I like, if I like a girl, if I like a girl, it normally doesn't work out because I think I have, I have an anxious, avoidant, attachment style. Or you might scare them off because you're doing the, the ghetto, black, touch your dick off. I know exactly what's going on. Oh, hell no. I know exactly what's going on.

When you have trouble, like, so here's the problem. You see a woman you're interested in, right? Now you can't talk to her. And I think it's because we come at it, there's a lie in there. and the lie is this, you're really attracted to her, but you're going to act like you're not. So you're not an artificial, you're not a fake guy.

You're not a phony dude. So the minute you talk to her now, you're trying to act like you're not interested. So you're already lying. It's already a lie. It's already an antagonistic, strange relationship because now you're not even yourself. You're trying to be normal and casual.

And I think that the way out of that is to fucking be really honest. What takes a lot of pressure off is to come up and go, hey, this is going to sound really creepy. You're fucking gorgeous. Just be funny about it and then talk to her. Well, here's what I would say. Here's what I would say. If I was being really, if I was being really honest, this is what would come out.

Hey, you're super attractive. I'm very nervous right now. Great. I don't know if that's good. Dude, I'm in. I'm sucking you. I'm in. I'm sucking your dick.

Hey, I'm a little nervous right now. I'm pretty attracted to you. I'm putting it all out there. Okay. I need you to know that for the first one or two times that we hang out, I am not going to be myself. That's great. I'm going to be.

shell of who I am money because I'm too afraid to be myself even though I should just totally me that's charming girl a girl will look at you and go oh my god you know oh my and now you're interested and I'm freaky maybe just like keep going into the neurose now you're interested and I need you to not be because that's making me feel like there's a possibility and I'm scared so let me spit on me so let me spit on me tell me I'm a piece of shit there might if I get the sock out this weekend I could do this is the only way the only way to actually hook up hell no is just to bring out a black puppet this is how i do it there was a i swear to god there's a mel gipson movie called the squirrel i think have you ever heard of this

movie yes he he like he is a depressed miserable guy and he just takes out a squirrel puppet and he completely finds himself uh and builds confidence by having this is this an older movie yeah it's a little bit older watch it but yeah let's take a little break b because one touch can change everything. The crowd, the momentum, the game itself. It never gets old, especially when my Broncos are kicking ass with the number one seed. Draft King's Sportsbook and official sports betting partner to the NFL. Missouri, listen up. Draft King Sportsbook is now live in the show me state. Congrats. Here's the best part. New customers, you bet just five and if your bet wins, you'll get 200 in bonus bets instantly. Download the draft king sportsbook app. Use the code

fighter. That's code fighter. Bet five bucks get 200 in bonus bets if your bet wins. In partnership with Draft Kings, the crowd is yours. Gambling problem, call 1-800 Gambler. In New York, call 8778-8-Hop-N-Y or text Hope-N-Y-4-667-369. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling called 888-7-8-7-7 or visit CCP. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boothill Casino-Win Resort in Kansas, pass-through of per-wager tax may apply in Illinois. 21 and over. Age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction, void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bet must win to receive bonus bets which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. Four additional terms and responsible gaming research.

sources, see dkng.com.co slash audio. Limited time offer. This November, action is free on Pluto TV. Go on the run with Jack Reacher. Every suspect was a train killer. Then buckle up for drive, World War Z. Happy human being we save. It's one list of fights. And Charlie's Angels. Damn, I hate to fly. Launch into sci-fi adventure with the fifth element and laugh through the mayhem in Tropic Thunder. What is going on here? All the thrills. All for Free, Pluto TV. Stream now. Hey, never.

I kind of watch, I think it's actually supposed to be a good movie, but what a crazy premise. Yeah, like a beaver. It's called the beaver. You should bring out. The beaver. Bring out the black puppet.

Imagine, imagine being pitched on a movie where it's like you. Hard pass. Yeah. It is a rough. Jody Foster is in it. It's like a legit movie. It's a legit movie. Yeah.

Yeah. It was too, it looked way too artsy. I watched some of it. It was, it was well made. horrendous. Yeah. I'm not watching.

I mean, but doesn't it make you interested, aren't you just like, I got to see that shit. I was like that looks like a super, that looks like a very artsy film that's going to make me sad. Not arts. I look at, oh, he has tax trouble. But everything starts going better. Look at that. That's insane. It could be you, dude.

It could be. Oh, hell no, girl. Rock hard. What's up, girl? Yeah, so I'm just like, look, I'm nervous, but this guy is it, motherfucker. Why don't you suck my dick? I love the way these white bitches and all the way around the dick. And that's good.

Suck the black off my dick, bitch. Got looking like a Q-tip. Clean out your ears with my dick. You know what I'm saying? That's charming. It's charming. It's pretty charming. Honestly, that's super charming.

I think it's going to go well for you. All right. All right. The report bag, brother. I got a question. I got a question that went at. Did you stop doing stand-up? Yes, sir.

Why did you stop? Few reasons. The biggest was just the time commitment. Like I couldn't. I have three kids, right? Young kids. Oh, okay. So a lot of.

of is like, I mean, you know the hustle, especially you right now, but I'm saying where the tour sucks, but it's really like you got to work during the week too. And so I was missing a ton of stuff with my kids, a ton, man. You just didn't. You never like traveling. I hate traveling. But I have some great memories from it. But the biggest thing too is I'm fortunate where if standup doesn't work out for you, you probably go back to marketing where the fuck you want to do. I'm fortunate where I can stop stand up and my life doesn't change. Like I make. I make. good money from it, but if it goes since I'm able to stop it, I'm okay. So I didn't have to do it. We don't have to do it. I can't be one foot in, one foot out of stand-up, especially me.

Like, I have to be all in. I couldn't be all in. Yeah. And did like the hate get to you too and like, no. No, it wasn't that. No. You could have kept doing it for. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I looked at as almost a positive thing like, damn, I can step away from stand-up and my life doesn't change financially. Like, that's pretty cool. Yeah. and you could always go back to it too do you think you'll go back or never yeah no no i can't i know you did it i mean you did it oh i did you were grinding yeah yeah yeah for sure yeah i love it i just i miss the hang i miss the hang with the guys that's why i miss most is the hang but even that like the hang at the nothing at the mothership but i've been there like the hang

there isn't like the comedy store in 2019 like when it's theo and chris and joey and rogan and Jeff die and Brian like when all the boys are there and we're just hanging until two in the morning. It's great. Even though I'm fucking in my 40s, it was just the best, man. You know? Yeah. I miss that.

I don't miss the traveling. I don't miss the grind. I don't miss that. I was also drinking heavily. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's easy to.

You don't drink or anything. I'm pretty good about like being. Yeah, not not drinking a ton and stuff like that. Like I, you know, it's for me, like really affects me. Like, and I just, pop it drink?

He fucking, yeah. He liked that nose. He liked that nose. Hennessy. Surrock. Sirrock. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I think too, also you're, like you started having success later. Like you're a little older. Yeah. If I was 24, I would be.

I can't imagine. A fucking, yeah. It would be a mess. I would have squandered all of, you know, I'm sure.

I don't really know, but like, yeah for me i think a big thing is like it's so new i don't want it to go away you know like i want i want to keep going like this and anything yeah anything they could get in the way of that i'm like i'm a little nervous about so you should be so i like well it's hard it's hard to keep this thing going too oh yeah and it's inevitably you know like the novelty of it is gone and you know so again you're again you're creative it's not an accident i i i i Thanks, man.

You're not, so some people get famous, it's an accident, and it goes away quickly. Your success isn't an accident. You're creative, and you come up with ideas all the time, and you're always thinking of ideas. So you will adjust, and you'll keep adding value. I always say that to young people. I'm like, you have to be hitting it from a lot of different angles, and you have to always be originating with new ideas.

If you don't do that, good luck, you know. I'm putting out a, I guess you could call it a fake stand-up special. It's 48 minutes. So, I'll have the gringo puppet. You got to do that. You got to do that. Dude, you should do gringo puppet. Make a, God, that'd be so funny.

Make a Brendan Schaub puppet go so meta. Do, just do like, just make funny yourself. Do like a really, I'll help you with it? You got to do that. I will help you with it. It's a funny idea. Oh, my God. Yeah.

Honestly, honestly, that would be, that would be so good. The Gringo puppet. The Gringo Puppet. And just do literally word for word. Here's the thing. Do the whole act. Here's the thing. People are like, oh, it's an hour.

That was just, it was 22 minutes of stand-up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It wasn't an hour. Yeah. You know what I think really kind of fucked you a little bit? What's that? Was the way the set looked. Because it looked like the buildings, it just looked a little cheap with the cardboard cutout.

And I think that was something that people came at. You don't have to do a special. Like most people don't do a special until they're 10 years in. It's like there's no reason to do it right now because it just, it's all downside. I just didn't think the material was bad. Like, like I just, I don't think a lot of people watched it. And I think a lot of people were like picking apart the things that they saw in images. It's like nickel back.

Like once the hate starts, then it becomes trendy to hate on that person or group. So it became a thing. It's died down now. especially then it became like this cool thing to hate on me but the but the but the amount of people that commented on it and didn't watch it like just watch the whole thing i'm if you could see the data on that you know i just yeah nobody watches anything anymore like like apparently with like a lot of people people they hate on your special i'm sure they didn't watch it you know i think it's i think that's true for everybody false gods false gods i have a whole new hour i'll be at the uh hold on let me let me

let me plug my date with now I want to say off the hook comedy club Naples Florida this Friday Saturday Oh hell yeah Oh hell yeah This is a with a naval floor Wait do it with your puppet Can you just do it?

What's the information? I'm going to be at the I'm going to be at the fucking Naples Florida and off the hook comedy club December 12 and 13 And then I'll be in Tampa Florida At Sidesplitters

December 26 27 and 28 right after Christmas Memorized all of that Bob Squad coming out Bob Squad coming to your city Come see me by with my new hour God damn I'm the Bob Squad Is that what you said

That is what I said That's exactly what I said You remember all that Check it out Yo Bob squad up in this is my fucking right here Pop squad coming here Naples

That shit gonna be off the hook That shit gonna be off the hook Side splits you're gonna be splitting your side You're gonna hate my shit so much God Day after Christmas Day after Christmas I'm gonna hospitalize you from not laughing God damn

27, 28? No, but yeah. People, the internet's, the internet's nuts. I interrupted you, though, to plug my fucking date. No, I was interrupting you. I was, it's on me, Brian. No, it's on me. Do you just try to kiss me?

What the fuck was that? Yeah, I did. Yeah, okay, come on. I know. Well, it's because you keep giving me highs and you keep asking for it. I'm not. I don't read people well. I just make eye contact if somebody's talking to me.

Oh, I don't read people. I think you're reading me wrong. Oh. Yeah, yeah, I try to make eye contact. If somebody's talking to me, yeah. Like my dad talks to me, I look him in the eyes. I don't want to kiss my dad. Okay, but you're looking at me soft.

Are you not? I don't know. Also, soft look. Is that mean, like, I think a hard look, that means, like, if I'm like, no, maybe not. I don't know. Now I'm a hard motherfucker. No, I'm fucking, no. Do you watch fights or anything?

No. But I, I'm not opposed to it. Like, I can get into a football game, you know, if I'm watching it, but I don't really keep up. Wait, wait, wait, wait, go back to, you were going to do it. You're going to do a fake stand-up special. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's called, um,

a crowd work joint. So it's kind of making fun a different stand-up stand-up specials. Kind of, but like it's like nothing against Nate Jackson, but he comes out

with these things called crowd work joints. So I'm calling it a crowd work joint. I filmed it at Creek in the Cave. So I did a whole set at Creek in the Cave. And then afterwards, I was like, guys,

I'm going to do this little thing. I'm going to come back out. I did a shot for shot remake of Shane Gillis's intro for Live in Austin, which was at the Creek in the Cave. For no reason. I just,

I just did that same music. And then I come out, I bomb with crowd work for a minute, and then I leave. And then the entire special is just people leaving, people cleaning up. You just keep the camera there, multiple angles of it.

It's 48 minutes. And then there's, in the middle, in the middle, there's like, there's like a, kind of like a satirical version of, like,

Andrew Schultz for Infamous did a gambling ad. And so I do like a, like a little gambling ad, in the middle of people keep watching it, which they won't. But yeah, it's really dumb. It's really dumb. And then at Skankfest,

you know, like, I've, like, to even know Brian and like to meet, like, to, I just did a podcast with Adam Ray. I'm like, I did one with Harlem Williams. You know, like, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm like, bumping elbows. Harlem Williams is the first guy I saw do stand up when I was 21. He's the guy that whenever,

I don't go see people at the mothership, but I'll buy tickets I bought tickets to see him the two times he was there I'm just a huge fan and then I you know and they got to do his podcast so all this is like

very surreal how about him on brandstorming too oh so funny so funny he fucking dumped the product magic mine on a score a stuff squirrel and then would suck on it

I think he got he got that like the ad is also just the filming of the brand so he was just doing like super funny he's the best he's the best he's absolutely the best yeah just being able to go to his house do that podcast his house is so dope yeah it's so dope yeah it's so dope it's so dope that's the best yeah you created paw patrol he created pop patrol yeah

yeah harlin williams created paw patrol what what's the what's the one with the ha it might be pa patrol what's the what my kids watch it he he owns that he created it the children he created a children show? Yeah, yeah. I had no idea. That's crazy. It's amazing. It's not Paul Patrol.

What's the other one? I think it just went off. Probably not Paul Patrol. Puppy Dog Pows? Puppy Dog Pows, which was massive. That's crazy. It was like eight seasons. He was telling me that, you know, because like a lot of people, they'll move to L.A.

from wherever they'll grind for a while. They won't make it. The people that do will take him a while. He just like, he showed up and like the next week had a sitcom. He just fucking, he just fucking showed up. Everybody was like, oh, my God, this guy is the funniest person. He was talking about that. He goes, he said, no matter what, it's what I was talking to you about this.

It's like, you know, I used to always worry after I did a special, like, am I going to be able to write again and be original? I'd never worry about that anymore. And we were talking about it. It's like, you get to an age, like, also where you start to trust that the spirit. You know, he calls it the comedy spirit. You'll find it. You just got to keep showing up and it'll just, you'll find something fun.

Yeah. And that's what you. do that's that's what you're doing now with that fucking fake special that's hilarious like it's always something it's it will be funnier i think when you guys see it you kind of have to see it to do you edit yourself and everything uh i can edit so it's cool like all the things that i did before stand up are helping me yeah yeah you know take advantage of it like the marketing i've been editing shit for 15 years i was doing this ai stuff which you were okay because of your company yeah yeah i just like yeah i would like put out my own stuff i'd know my way around i'd know my way around

camera kind of so yeah just everything is let up to this and that's what it takes so much of it is in our control now yeah because one thing that people do is they'll go and kill tony they'll have something really good and they won't even put the clip online and the first thing i did was i i put the entire set online yeah and then that's how i saw you yeah it was just you just you clip stuff up and then people reposted you take it didn't you take tony was laughing so hard because he was telling me, that, uh, Tommy and Rogan that you, uh, you came out with a leather jacket and then took the leather jacket off and there was another leather jacket. Yeah. I also came out with, uh, he was dying. We were all dying because he was explaining what you did. It was so

stupid. I was like, that's my kind of dude. Like, that's so dumb. It's like Harlan who pulled out like his own, his own fucking award on Kill Tony. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what, yeah, Harlan's sense of humor is just my exact sense of humor. Harlan's so funny. He's so funny. Remember when Harlan came on this show and he's feeding that he brought a fake baby and was literally in the middle of the show feeding it peanut butter and covering it in peanut butter.

And we're like, what the fuck are you doing, dude? Destroyed the set. He's incredible. This fake baby's covered in peanut butter. And we weren't going with the bit and he's just fucking dumping peanut butter. He just commits to. He let me the longest voicemail yesterday. going, I'm sorry to bother you, buddy. I really apologize. But if we could get a full,

a full length picture of you for Christmas that we could just kind of put in front of the Christmas tree. And hopefully it's a nude. And I know it's a lot for you, but get the lighting right. And if not, maybe you could wrap your fat thighs around my sister's acne covered face. Thanks a lot. So as much as you jokes around when I did a show, he was, he was like, man, I want to Do you think I can beat you in a fight? And I'm like, laugh. You know, I'm like, no, dude.

Yeah. And he's like, I'm serious, man. I want to fight you. I'm like, all right. And I thought it was a bit. I'm like, all right. But what do you want to do? He's like, no, I'm serious, man.

Like, do you care if we fight? I'm like, dude, I'm going to fuck you up, man. Yeah. He's like, no. Like, well, you agree to him? Like, I guess, dude, really? In here, he's like, yeah. I'm like, all right.

And then he gets out those fucking rockem sockum Robos. Yeah, yeah, yeah. so all that's a bit and then when i'm leaving he goes hey man i wrote you something and i'm like oh this is gay you know because he's always fucking around he's like i wrote you something dude i read it i i almost cried it was a poem about me oh wow like really heartfelt no he's knew all his shit harland special it was a poem that he wrote and i'm like dude that is telling me that's yeah i'm like that's the nicest thing anybody's ever done wow yeah yeah i framed it he offered me

soil to eat yeah i framed it wow that was nice he offered me is like you want to eat some of the that he had like gardening shit and it was like before we went on he was like you want some of that soil and it's like yeah he's like yeah you got to eat it he's like cool cool he's the best he's super nice dude yeah yeah but he's a you know like comedic

hero and just to be able to like sit and riff with him was surreal and he had like yeah he has stuff prepared he like brings out Johnny Spark plugs he's like got a leather jacket on I did the weather with him on TV in Canada. In Calgary, we both did the weather together. Like real weather on a news station?

For real. Oh, fuck, yeah. We took it over from the guy. Didn't he get married recently? No. He has a serious girlfriend. Yeah. Super serious.

Does he? Yeah. He's, I was like, what are you doing today? No, I'm hanging out with my girl. Yeah, no, no, it's super serious. That's kind of new, though, Bob. When I saw him when I was on a show two years ago, he's with her. Really?

Yeah, because they travel around. like he has a place in Florida and then they go to what's that event people go to in the desert north in uh fucking California yeah you know what I'm talking zoom zoom zoom zoom oh no no you know you know where in the middle of nowhere spring no with no then you know like obri goes remember and they dress like mad max in the currency's like your mouth the burning man burning man he was a burning man oh he does yeah every year he goes every year yeah yeah I didn't know that see new girlfriend When are you going to get a girlfriend, Timmy? But let's take a little break here.

You're still on your phone. Listen, this episode, The Fire and Kid is brought to you by Progressive Insurance, fiscally responsible, financial genius, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way.

Visit Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance. Progressive Couser Insurance Company Affilates, Potential Savings will vary, you're not available in all states of situations progressive Brennan let's take a little break we'll get back to Timmy no break we'll get Timmy right now I want to talk about auto parts I need auto parts I need a friendly staff I need somebody who knows what's going on I want to change my battery when I'm in my car I want to change my battery when I'm not in my car I want a new windshield wipers whatever the case what do I do where do I go because it's got to be in stock I got I got

I got in stock I got the one stop shop for you it's the only place I go to it's O'Reilly auto parts oh oh O'Reilly auto parts listen I'm who's switching out the intake manifold to my Jeep 392 intake manifold yep you have no clue i'm talking about my will be mandarin but it's all right listen i needed tough paint that's going to hold up in the heat i needed a gasket they had it all i went in store didn't have to order it they have everything i need small parts big parts they have it off they don't they order it it shows up the next day or same day they're the best uh so whether you're a car rookie or a freaking i'm a car rookie or if you're an expert They got you, man.

The people at O'Reilly Auto Parts are one-stop shop for everything you need on your freaking whip. Do it yourself. That's what it is. Stop by O'Reilly-Aughts today. Visit them at O'Reillyato.com slash fighter. That's O'Reilly auto. com slash fighter. They are hands down the best, O'Reilly.

I'm not opposed. I'm not opposed to having a girlfriend. I like, I'm telling you, dude, what you just said is very charming. If you come out to a girl and you're honest, because you're not a fake guy. So you have to be honest. You have to be like, hi. You make me nervous. Okay, I'll try that.

I don't think you have to do anything. I think it's just going to come when the time's right. I don't think you should force it. Force like, force an approach to a girl or force like a relationship? A relationship. Oh, I'm definitely not going to force a relationship.

No, you should force a relationship. Okay. All right. Let me get both sides of this coin. Yeah. Yeah. Just say, I want you to meet my mom and bring her out from behind a, like, a fucking bush.

No, so I want you meet my mom, that's your fucking racist puppet. Yeah, it's my mom. Oh, hell no, bitch. The mom is a black guy. No, you should have mom. No, make you a black girl. You should have mom. Timmy's always bothering me.

And then you have the black guy. And the black puppet is banging your mom. And then you're like, oh, and you do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I'm going to do something like with the microphone. I'm going to make that a dick act out. That's like, Def Jam, like they do these big act out. So like figuring out.

Don't make it stereotypical. Give them a regular dick. It's science. It's to scale. It's to scale. It's science. It's a big. Dick's.

Science. But yeah, working that bit out, like, figuring, it's crazy, holy shit. God, so I saw, I was like, good for him. Good for him is right. Good for him. You have a type, Timmy? You know, physically,

she's got to have a big dick. Big dick. Tiny ass, no tits. Just a disgusting face. And I want her to, yeah, I want her to just not be. a supportive person. You know what I mean?

That's right. So I dated a girl and I don't think she thought the whole Timmy No Break's thing was funny and it just like it just made it. Yeah, it's just hard. It's not fun.

It's like, yeah. So I think they have to like think I'm funny. Does your mom want you made like a Jewish girl? No, she doesn't give a shit. Doesn't care. My mom doesn't think it's funny. But that's okay.

She's a mom. Yeah, whatever. And she's not like going out of her way to be like, this isn't funny. She's just like, yeah, it's not for me. Yeah, it's not my thing.

My dad loves it. my mom is like, I don't know. What do your parents do? My mom is a lawyer. My dad is like a hot shot, like business guy. Really? So he like advises CEOs now. Oh, wow.

Yeah, I had a pretty privileged upbringing. You grew up with some money. I was Jewish. In San Diego, by the way. Jewish, Jewish, Jewish, San Diego. Yeah. I don't know. I honestly don't know what it is.

I don't know if it's like a, I think, I think it's, Part of it's an intelligence thing. Like, I think that they got breeded to be... It's also survival. Maybe. You guys also emphasize on it. You know what I'm saying? Like when other cultures emphasize on other shit?

Yep. Is this right? A man... No, no, no, no. No, no, no. You said, you said, you said it's survival because of the Holocaust, right? No, it's not that. The Jews never had a homeland up until 1948.

Now, think about this for a sec. It's, if you don't, if you don't have any... If there are two things you have to do in a society, you better make yourself useful. So traditionally, they had to make them. make themselves useful or they'd be killed or moved out. Number two, you had to, you better make money because that's the only way you have mobility, get the fuck out of there and have some power.

You've got to make yourself needed. So, when that becomes the focus of masculinity, men are going to do that shit. Number three, make it funny. Say a funny thing right now about Jews. It's a comedy podcast, right? Make it funny. All right, if you don't like the Jews, you're not allowed to use any of their inventions, okay like lasers light bulb lasers they're using to control the weather still interplanetary

hollywood hollywood the pills you can't you got no more raw dog and you got to use it can't be in any films or tv that's right started by four can't invest your money anywhere uh MRI machine a jewish a jewish invention so next time you got a lump yeah take a guess flash lights flash lights yeah you sure and then by the way ready for the big one right for the big one fake tits so your wife ready for the punchline your wife may not be Jewish but a tits are oh that's pretty funny actually that's a not a bad one yeah yeah your tits your tits what they see money they're like what that's a punchline that's pretty good the tits see money big pop from breton chob big pop big pop big pop i can make a tit's wiggle by taking a fucking brick a hundred dollar bills and going back and forth yeah she's like a fish no pop no pop no pop

the bump fuck in three months that's gonna be funny bro when i write yeah you just gotta work it out i think if that makes your next special what when i bring a puppet into it what when i bring a puppet into it where where would you do your next special if you had to pick i'm not gonna ukraine dude that would be i could do it in ukraine um i uh i don't know if specials make any sense anymore fuck who watches them yeah do you want to open for me on the road we're going to phoenix you want to i need an opener i'll fuck you all right you want to try to bury my ass you want to try to bury me on the road sure i'll come out say what time we go we go from when's your next special you want to open hey hey you know what the truth is you can i be honest with

you look at me you don't want me to open for you it's going to be a tough follow yeah bring it on but I'd love to, I'd love to show you. I mean, I'll prove it to you. Do your, do your act right now. You want me to bring my A game? Give them an hour. Give it the hour right now. Do it open for an hour?

I'm going to do 10. I got five hours to choose from so I can just bring my egg. Do you bring openers or? So, so I bring a feature, which is, he's, he's like, you know, one of my best friends in the scene. And like, we also, like, write stuff together. So it's just like, it's good to, you know. it's a good have them because it's i'm not really making like fly and put up a feature money

um but i'm like you know whatever uh and then openers i wouldn't bring them but i like i have friends who are like i have points you know i'd love to just come and do it i'll still pay them like an opener but i'm like i can't fly and put you both up so now i have like another friend other friends you know it's good to have friends that they can shoot stuff that you push each other yeah it's it's also not as lonely also the hate it's great to like have people that you like uh with you i think that's otherwise you're alone in fucking niac i did i did i did huntsville alabama i was by myself and i was like you want to blow your head out yeah blow my brains out christillia and i um this is another thing

we had a laugh meter and at the laugh factory and it was packed in 2019 like you know top of the game we want to see who got the most laughs i love that yeah who uh you know who got the heart hardest laughs for the longest. Where'd you find the laugh meter? How much did Chris Wimba? I beat him, of course. And the biggest laugh was when I was done, because I went second. And he's over there, and I fucking murder the room.

And I go like this, I go, hey, Chris. And he goes, yeah. And I go, that's how it's done. The whole place is fucking crazy. And then they held up the meter. I'm like, don't ever, don't ever. I let you play around the sandbox, but, you know, what are you doing over here?

Still my toys, Papa. You know what I'm saying, Bubba? come on i just did the laugh factory brought the house down oh that place is unbelievable when it's sparing evasion what no no this happened i didn't bomb but no that's my what night did you do it on oh it was it was like a tuesday night or something now no brennan and i watched bill burr that one time like we're all on there right before he's gonna shoot a special bro and he did it we were laughing and i it was unbelievable i walked up i was like bill that was ridiculous. You do the improv too? Hollywood Improv? I did the lab. So I did the Broom. Not the

Yeah. Yeah, I'm not yeah. I'm not brand shop yet. I love it. Remember the improv? The improv is great. The store was great. I did the store. I got to do the store. That was crazy. Did you do the main room? Yeah. I did did a guest spot at the very end. We were we were people there. Were you more nervous? Do the main room at the store or the mothership? Uh, main room at the store, but part of it I think was that it was earlier that like that happened not this last trip to L.A. It happened the first one. I like didn't want to there's so many things I've done that I have not wanted to do because it's so like the the most nervous more than

Madison Square Garden more than anything was Casey Rocket had to drop out of a headline of headlining spots like a weekend at Comedy Works in Denver and I had never yeah never headlined before I, I, so when this came off, I had a pretty shitty 20 minutes, maybe. And then now I'm doing like 50, but like, at that time I had only done 30 once. So I had to go there and just like, I did a character that I like don't do anymore. How'd he go? You know, when, it went, it's a great, it's a great room, you know.

It's a good room and if it's the case you rockets crowd. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This mother, we'd have 21 people, 2100 people in a, in a theater right we were doing fighter and a kid we'd do these live shows when it was you know huge and we'd have like it'd be seattle 2100 people would show up and i would look at brenna and i go so i'm going to pretend to be late and you're going to go up and cover for me and you're going to tell a story and he had never done stand-up in his fucking life and he would get up and do it and like you know and then were you nervous that was his intro that was all right that was his no that was his

baptism in the fire but you got to remember he would put his underwear on and go fight other giants in the octagon in front of people my thing is like after that word after that i got my bomb but i'm like that's that's true like after doing that comedy works thing like nothing like i'll never be that anxious he would fight he would have to in practice like guys would show up who were six foot six 240 pounds they were professional kickboxers and they would be trying to kill him because his coach would say if you knock him out you get an extra thousand dollars that was a tuesday and bro that was a tuesday and i remember like he having his having his hands wrapped and i and i was looking at this guy and i go and he goes he turns him he goes so you want to be a fighter right that's what you want to do

that's what i deal with and i was like oh my god so once you've done that yeah that's a good point your stand-up is not it's just not that scary it's also my fc t so my stand-up suck but but but But, um, that's, I got a, I gotta fucking go. Do you know, I like that big time. I don't, I don't, I don't want to. I like it. I like it. I really don't want to. I'm having a great time. I can talk to you guys forever. Casey Rocket, I love watching his clips. He's funny as fuck in person, normal dude, or is he crazy as bad? He's, uh, he's, he's, uh, he's, so I've, I've only met him in person once, but I've been texting with him a lot.

he is um he kind of is that character he's great yeah yeah yeah that that is him he'll like say he's great he's wild he's a wild guy he's one of the best people i've ever met in my life like he'll he'll he'll write you it's like poetry if i read you some of these text messages it's it's like very well thought out it's like you absolutely is he here in austin yeah he's um he's here a lot he's still on the road i he moved to chicago but i think he came back i don't know where he's at him off. I saw him at SkangFestown. You know, how great was Christina Mariani in that, in that brandstorm thing we did? Oh, she's, she fucking, so talented. I was like, damn it. I don't know and beautiful. But she's so awesome. Yeah, she's the love of my life. She's Italian, by the way. Yeah.

She's for real Italian. And I'm fake Italian. So yeah. Get your sock out. See how it goes. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe she'll be into the sock. If they do a live action Mario brothers, you could play Mario. You know this, right? That's why I've heard. That's hilarious. That's why I've heard. And then Schultz plays fucking Luigi. But do you know Christina? I don't know her. Oh, she's, I'm she's uh she's very good i think she's the funniest comic in austin she's so good her she's like one of the best writers one of the best joke writers and she's a hundred percent she comes from italy she grew up in it wow she hasn't been doing it that long i think she's like four years maybe a little over four years she's she's a very special talent but she's blown

i've seen some of her clips yeah she's she's kind of amazing and we like we're like we're hitting a lot of the same it's funny like you you're like you have these people and you're just like following each other around doing weekends back to back and stuff it's kind of cool so like we we can talk about like what kind of deals are you getting yeah you guys can compare top shop don't do that don't do that stuff it'll make it well just just just in trying to understand like what is good and what is bad and then and then stop yeah it's just uh you're all the same level you got you know yeah yeah it's just helpful you're like oh i'm kind of getting fucked i'm gonna write this up to my This improv offer me eight G's, man.

Your manager, if he's good, we'll know that too, though. Like, right, they'll usually have an idea. Don't bang out of manager. Keep doing what you're doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got a skeptical of everything a little bit. I know it sounds weird, but when you brought the puppet thing, I'll let you get out of here. I want to do a puppet show with you because I have an idea.

Let's do it. Let's do it. We just put it on YouTube. I will license you the rights. I just want to be. I want to be the white guy. I want to be the white guy. No, you be the gay guy.

Do a gay accent. Oh, hey. Well, I should be gay. I should be gay, I should sort of be gay, but sort of super. Just start with whatever you won. I just want to be super. Like, I just want to be really woke. But I want to actually be another white guy who is, does never really hung out with a black guy.

And I want to ask you questions. Yeah, so like the real you. You just want to play yourself. That's crazy. Yeah. Crazy. Real stretch. Just want to be younger.

I want to be a boy. All right, brother. I know you're going. We appreciate me. Hey, I wish I could be here longer. This was so fun. No, we'll do it again, brother. Come by.

Anytime. Just come by. Just literally open the door God damn 40 minutes you get up Yeah just like 45 We drive the same car Oh you have a test

Gay