The Flop House - Ep. #198 - The Cobbler

Episode Date: February 20, 2016

It's the Jewish magical realism tale that almost made Elliott hate his own Judaism: The Cobbler. Meanwhile, Stuart suffers from cartoon eye degeneration, Dan would like you to know very much that he's a wealthy murderer, and Elliott's singing has started to  bleed dangerously outside the letters section. Movies recommended in this episode: The Deer Hunter The Witch Chi-Raq

On this episode we watched the Cobbler... Starring... Shoes... And... Other Shoes... Sandler. Sandals. The resort. Hey everyone, welcome to the flop house, I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington and I'm

Elliott Kalen rounding it out. All three of us. The light full scamp. America's favorite rascal. Elliott Kalen. And where is hand yeah, we're your handlers. Yeah, I'm like, yeah, my handlers. And that's why you have to lock me back up in a cage at the end of the night. And that's why I have to spray myself with LA urine. Just to get me interested in you. Yeah, just to get him interested as in hanging out with me. What do you get my urine again, by the way? I have to collect it from I guess like benches and trees from the area.

Yeah, that's where I put it. And little jars. Yeah, little apple juice, mozzarella juice jars. Yeah, yeah, mozzarella juice jars. And to Madelo beer bottles, I mean, it tastes delicious. That's what Stuart's drinking out of. You can't see it.

It's a visual guy. Yeah, imagine now Stuart's doing a spit take. Potuay, Potuay's doing a spit take. Petrui, Petrui gross. We're done. Oh, and also his eyes popped out and he made, turned it to like a star. His eyes were popped out. He turned it to like a star. He was all in his hands, turned it to a balance.

I'm blown blind, it stretched out my optic nerves. Hit himself with the mallet really hard because I guess he saw like a sexy lady or something. He's, now he's, he's banging on the table. Yeah, my eyes, my eyeballs are hanging out of my head. Somebody pulling my toenails real hard to pull them back in. Yeah, that works cartoon biology. That's a, they teach you that in the cartoon medical schools.

How to handle somebody's eyes popped out of their head or they were flattened by something. Usually there's live inflating or deflating. Yeah, or like how to unzip somebody's skin to just get their skill up and right out. Yeah, so you can set their bones. Put them back in. Yeah.

How do you gotta play their ribcage like his isle phone? Yeah, I want you to use a conservatory to learn how to play it. Cartoon music conservatory. Yeah, even ribcage. You wouldn't be, I mean, it wouldn't surprise you. I guess how many duck bill refascinings we have to do back at the cartoon, the car.

Ducks get shot blown up, bill gets spun around you got to reattach it. The part part is reattaching the bill to the throat. Okay. It takes a lot of clamps. Oh, okay. Yeah. That's how a bill becomes a law. Kids, it's all on the test.

Remember it for later. So this podcast is a podcast where we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it. Glad you took us back to first principle Yeah, well some people might think it's a totology. I think you just need to know Yourology yourology is so taught Dan are you working out? Well, thank you So yeah, so we do this podcast we talk about that later there Just let that sink like a stone. Mm-hmm.

All the way to the bottom of the ocean. An aborted pregnancy. I don't like it. Don't like it at all. You know what, Dan? I'm going to let you keep going down the dead end. You're on it. Stuart and I can go down a different road.

Screw. Screw. Haw Kong. Wee. Wee. The car doesn't even have gas or wheels. It seems to be some kind of a TV box. Let me put another lever in this so that it can be a little vibrate around in front of the drug store a little bit longer and keep Dan busy so we can get started on the podcast.

Dan, and by the way, that I mean Stewart. Yes. What was the movie we watched? We watched a movie called The Cobbler. Now, a lot of people have been asking us to do this movie because they know how much we love dessert. Yeah. Yeah. Dan, what is a Cobbler? You're a baker.

Kind of like a grunt. What does that mean? It's a little bit like a crisp. Okay. What's a grunt? A grunt is like a... Like, I'm familiar with the brothers grunt? A grunt is like... Like I'm familiar with the brothers grunt.

They wore wing tips and just boxer shorts or board shorts. And we're a kind of bad way to set up a framework for music videos and MTV. A grunt is a cobbler that has basically biscuits on top of it. Okay, and what's a cobbler? A cobbler. Since he now explained a cobbler by comparing it to a grunt and a grunt by comparing it to a cobbler.

When Goldberry came to the door, it was as if an elf needed it come to the door. Cobbler, you know, it has not shown up in this book yet. Cobbler's a fruit thing that has more of a fruit thing. So like fruit by the foot of pastry top. Or like, is it more like a gusher? I'll lose pastry top. Oh, I'll tie that thing on. I'll get a pie.

That pastry's going to lose its top and Willie Tull Willie Talsal's gonna have to return it in the great cobbler off-road adventure. And Chris, you know, has like- It's a bad guy from kindergarten, got him sugar and butter all mixed together. He's the author of the naked civil servant. So what's a cobbler? Because I talked through most of the explanation. So it's like a fruit snack.

Yeah, it's like a pastry. That's what I said. Is looks like a fruit snack. Yeah, it's a fruit by the foot. That's what I said. No, okay. Is it like a gusher? It's one of them juicy fruits. Here's a juicy fruit. Is that a fried juicy from France? I'll have a steak juicy fruits.

And now, is it, can you roll it up? Oh, you could. It'll roll up for it up? Cause I love prudence. Roll up for you. You probably your hands pretty messy though. Now, uh, vis-a-vis Gert, does it go? Yeah, can you just take a cobweb on the go? Uh, roll it up or something? You can take most things out of the go.

Not anvils. That's true. Not blue whales. Yeah. All right. I mean, I guess most things is probably a... Not like an astymplum or a piece of... Yeah, like how many planets or stars can I take on the go?

Answer all of them. They're always moving through space. There's almost an infinite number of things that cannot be taken on the go. Thank you. Speaking of things that don't really go, just kind of sit around and don't do a lot, the cobbler, starting Adam Sandler. And written by Tom McCarthy. Currently nominated for a bunch of Oscars, right? For spotlight. Or the cobbler. Yeah. Cobbler for best cobbling. Tom McCarthy, who's work in the past.

I've enjoyed quite a lot. I liked spotlight. Yeah. I liked he did win win. He did win win. That station agent. I haven't seen that still. I like the visitor. I bumped into Tom McCarthy outside of screaming of his win-win. He was about to come in and talk to people and I had to go out early. But I was like, I gave him one of those. I liked your movie Thumbs Ups. Oh, as opposed to those I hated your movie Thumbs Ups. Yeah, that's right. Where do you just go?

It sucked. You thought the thumbs up. So I've got a lot of feelings for this man who, because he's so out together. That's the same movie. This movie not quite so good as the others in that it was not good. Let's talk about the basic premise.

It's a bit of magical realism rooted in, let's call it, it usually works in movie form. Almost always, and rooted in a very specific sort of, Pleasant or music. Yeah. Let's call it Jewish folk mysticism

or magical realism. It's a fairy tale, if you will, with a heavy bed of Clezmer music that is at times almost indistinguishable as steward pointed out from squirrel nut zippers music There is a cobbler mint played by Adam Sandler. He hates me in cobbler. Oh, well, we start out in the past It's the 1930s and some evil land developers trying to raise the rents that all these Jewish craftsmen of different types are gonna be run out of their stores. And one of them says, hey, they have a breaking competition

to keep the land developer at bay. Uh, I wish. In fact, I actually don't wish. The last thing I need to see is like, these Jews are gonna start break dancing. What? Cobbler. Come on.

Yeah, they could just borrow, break dancers shoes. Oh wait, we haven't even got to the magic shoes part of this. There's magic shoes, but this establishes that there's a magic shoe machine where if you, so if you go, The Miami shoe machine. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Gloria Stefan's shoe store, the Miami shoe machine was not as successful. I'll tell you why. They kept wanting to turn the feet around. But that's not how feet work. They only point in one direction. And if you try to wear shoes that point the other direction, you will hurt your feet. Yeah.

It'll fall over. So, because the magic shoe... Sturgeon has been, by the way, this whole time, Sturgeon's been playing with the cat, and I have to remove the cat toy from Sturgeon's hands. We can try to keep it. I find it very interesting. I can't find it.

Just trying to keep it real. I don't think it's less distracting than Archie, doing what Archie normally would do with that. Which is what? Like, conga dance? That's true. That would be very distracting. Or just like, hurl fish heads at us, they would also be distracting.

Practice is awesome. Power is impression. Come on, Mike, you horny. Meow, meow, RG powders. You're shagging out like my wife, et cetera. I didn't bur out, get in there. I don't know why not. I feel like awesome powers would probably be up for doing some boring.

Ruby, welcome to Jurassic Park. RG, you're not, I mean, that movie predates Austin Powers by a number of years. Yeah, so Austin Powers will just seen it. They didn't cover every moment of the time that he spent in our future. You're right, there was a point when they thought about to stop Dr. Evil.

And a certain way he said, I keep hearing about this groovy, Mudanasol movie. You gotta show it to me, baby. Uh-huh. My wife, you're not even married and that movie doesn't exist yet. Play it Sam. Do I make you want me? Well, you said the line correctly. So okay, that's fair. He didn't say play it against Sam. Yep. He started saying my wife. Uh, this guy calls up his cousin. He's like Sasha. It's your cousin Jimmy Baron Cohen, you know that catchphrase you've been looking for well listen to this say it again

Austin say what I don't understand I'm not even trying to do an awesome hours The idea of doing one is so so Demeaning to be that I'm not even trying. This is my awesome power depression. Do I make you horny? Yeah, baby. That's the new character. Ellie, Kaelin, the impressionist with too much self-destruct.

I'm not going to pretend I'm somebody else. I love me for me. Now, here's my Jimmy Carter. It's me, the president, Jimmy Carter. I've got lust in my heart. Yeah, I mean, that's something you said in text, too, and you know I also power said it all the time. Yeah Whoo. Okay. So Austin cat powers. So

There's a magic shoe machine. If you repair a pair of shoes with this machine and then put them on. That's not what you're saying. Can you let me finish explaining what the magic shoe machine does? It doesn't make shoes. No. It's not magic. It doesn't make magic shoes. But if you repair a pair of shoes with it and you put the shoes on, you instantly become just an appearance and voice, the person whose shoes,

who they belong to, who the shoes they belong to. Yeah, them at that exact moment in time. You look like them in that exact moment. And sound like them. And sound like them. And sound like them apparently. It's not like a being John Malkovich where you get ported into that actual person.

You just become their exact clone. Yeah, it's a real William Wilson type scenario. But you can maintain your own consciousness. And in fact, that's one of the failings of Adam Sandler's many plans to do that in his movies that he is an idiot. And when he becomes someone else, he doesn't try to act like they would.

He just acts like himself or... He's constantly invited to do what happened. Yeah. What? I'm pretending to be this person. I can't believe what's happening. Why are you treating me like this person that I'm pretending to be and who I look like? Now, okay, let's talk to you in the beginning. So, Magic Shoe Machine. Adam Sandler is running this

shoe store his fourth generation cobbler. He doesn't like it. He's on the Chinatown Lowery side area of New York. And he's supposed to be just be like a depressed humble man, but as we were saying before like the movie sort of overshoots and gets into like forest comp territory. He seems like he may have some sort of problem. It both overshoots into possible mental difficulties area and also he's a kind of with it withdrawn loner who is brought out of his shell. What happens? But he they go too far into almost like Travis Bickle territory where he's like a creepy guy. He's like a creepy awkward love. I mean, when we last caught up with our, our, our buddy, uh, Adam Sandler,

Sam, like, uh, yeah, yeah, the Sandman, we, it was, we entered Sandman. Yeah, that was in, uh, men, women and children, right? Yeah. A movie that also it looked like he you know rolled out of bed right into right into start shooting yeah um... he doesn't shave for his movies no i mean why would he it's cold outside that's a good point it's a very good point i mean it is currently cold outside

it actually looks quite warm in the movie even though he's always wearing a coat and scarf and here's the thing here's a tip for anyone. You don't have a hook, man. And who's scarf? Anyone who gets a magic shoe machine that lets you become another person, don't wear the same coat and scarf you wear all the time. Maybe.

But how will the audience know what you think? Because maybe they've been paying attention to the movie. Yeah, I just feel like a weird, like, comic booky thing. If the comic book character had this power, there would be some indicator at all times whether they're using the thing. It is also a moment for the director to be like, my audience is pretty stupid.

Well, maybe not. They're not gonna be able to follow this. They're just gonna think we're following a random person around to some reason. So we'll give them a big like moose print tie that he wears around or scarf, I mean. Or maybe he's hoping that that like moose back coat and that scarf will be like an Easter egg that people will be like when they're super pumped about it, or Scarf, I mean. Or maybe he's hoping that that coat

and that scarf will be like an Easter egg that people will be like when they're super pumped about it, they just finish the movie and they're like, well, let's start it back up again so I can see all the cool things that I missed. And they're watching it again. They're like, oh my God, that guy was wearing a tie. He was a zombie the whole time.

Or whatever. And then more like they were hoping and it would catch on and become like, like there was the Annie Hall look, there would be the Cobbler look, which to be wearing a long coat long brown coat and a brightly colored scarf And people would be like hey great Tom Baker costume no, I'm the cobbler Come on. I'm the cobbler South confusing me with the doctor

Because I'll tell you this Tom McCarthy of Emsand, we coat with a colorful scarf look has already been taken. Mm-hmm. You've been diagnosed with stealing intellectual property. Come on, there's something else. I ain't no, you're going to... Yeah, you're going to... And you're going to hospital jail. Sure.

What? So he is unhappy, he doesn't like it. He is told that there's an old man who is the last living person in his apartment building and is trying to be run out by evil developers who want to tear down the building and build a block of high-rise condos for the young rich people I'm guessing. He also works next door, his name is Max. This is as we can call him Max. He lives next door or works next door rather to Jimmy, played by Stevie Semi, who is a barber who loves pickles and is always given Max pickles to eat. next door or works next door, rather to Jimmy, played by a Stevie Semi, who is a barber who loves pickles,

and has always given Max pickles to eat. Yeah, an advice. And advice, but mainly pickles. And they have a close relationship, they're best friends, long time family friends. Max lives in sheep's head bay with his mother, his dad, they think is dead. Yeah.

And Max, how did he discover that the shoe machine, I guess his regular shoe machine breaks down. Method man brings in a pair of shoes. Method man playing, of course, a college professor. No, just kidding. He's playing some kind of drug dealing thug because of the two black characters in the movie. One is a criminal thug and the other is a kid who has made fun of for being fat. A number of times.

An obese child. Yeah. And so Adam Sandler's regular non-magical shoe machine breaks down. So he decides to repair them with his antique shoe machine. And then I guess he's just curious about shoes and wants to try them on because they're the same size he wears. Yeah, well, you know, he doesn't have a lot in his life. He's a cobbler. That's how it gets his illicit thrills. I mean, when you spend all day slaving over a hot pair of shoes,

you don't want to slip your dogs right in. That's true. Yeah. Now, what he really needs, and this would make his life a lot earlier, is a staff of magical elves that do the work for him at night. I mean, the movie would be great if they had like magical elf characters or like a talking shoe machine character. If the shoes came to life, and only he could hear them, now we're talking a great movie. Shoes have tongues, use them to talk. And they're like, hey, let's go out. I think it could be really good.

Shut up, shut up. Did you just tell your shoes to shut up? No, no, no, no. I was telling you to shut up. Yeah, you. That's better. Well, I never could just blew it, buddy. Shut up, shoes.

Did you just call me a stupid pair of shoes? No, no. But we're on a date at a fancy restaurant. I guess that's a fair, says, but I mean. You know what? If I was a pair of shoes, I would be stupid because I'm a great person. Thank you for the compliment.

Hey, as far out, I'll be your wingtip man. Shut up, shut up. Did you tell me to shut up again? No, I swear I was talking to my shoes. Uh, the cobbler rated our. For extensive news. Yeah. Because he spends a lot of time having sex with the shoes.

So did we describe what happens when he puts those shoes on? When he puts the shoes on, he looks like the person who shoes they belong to. I told I said that already. And so you're probably thinking, oh, I can't wait to watch this movie because I'm going to watch some really amazing CGI morphing effects. No. Like from the movie sleepwalkers where Adam Sandler like shakes his head really fast

and he like, yada yada yada yada. What? And he turns in a method man. I'll just said, no. No, the camera just cuts away. And then back, yeah. It's the easiest and frankly better way to do it. I don't know, man. No, they just cut away. And then back, yeah, it's the easiest and frankly better way to do it.

I don't know, man. And but also, if you're wondering, does he then try on a whole bunch of shoes and in the process, do a little transphobic humor? Yes, he does. Yeah. It is weird that those, that pair of pumps that he puts on, like, those silhou pumps, it doesn't look like his shoe machine would, I mean, I guess, re-soul them?

Yeah. There's no soul on these siletto heels. Yeah. Dan, every shoe has a soul. It's the plot of my new children's movie, All Shoe's Go To Heaven. It turns out people go to hell. But shoes go to heaven,

but people abuse shoes day and night, walking on them, forcing them to slave away for nothing. So we go to hell. It sounds pretty dark for a Pixar movie. Uh, Pixar loved it. Jimmy Pixar, the head of Pixar, he said it was the best movie they've made since Monsters University. Oh wow.

Now I, I wow, damning with Thingprease. I would have liked it if when he was trying on a bunch of different shoes, they did it in like a pretty woman montage style though, where Steve Shemami was sitting there, like giving a thumbs up or something. Yeah, and walk like a man plays. Yeah, or walk like an Egyptian. And he tried on some ancient mummy shoes

and turned into a fur. Walk it on sunshine. All right. I mean, when any of the walking things would work. These boots are made for walk. Perfect. It's a great, perfect. Yeah, well, why they didn't play that when he puts the boots. Blue Swade Sho Perfect. Great, perfect. Yeah.

Why they didn't play that when he puts them? Blue Swage Shoes. There you go. It had to be shoe. All right. Is that shoe? We're talking about that character for the Gumster shoe. They're a rassable duck reporter.

He lives in a tree. When Adam Saler takes him and stretches his little duck body around his feet, more of sand in the back coming back here. Wait, so hold on a second, his shoes are made out of his own body. His name is shoes. He's like, why did somebody name me this? So Adam Sandler puts on a bunch of shoes and he kind of, he now goes on a miniature crime spree where he's taking people's shoes and doing bad things with him. He's, he's dining and dashing food. He is creepily stalking some people. He puts on the shoes of a handsome guy who lives near his, his store and play by the guests, in Stevens and almost has sex under false

pretenses with the guys girlfriend until he realizes he had to take his shoes off. It's creepily close. Yeah, she's inviting him. She's new and she's inviting him. She's in the shower. She has a she has an organic reason for being there. She's not just swanning around nude. She's invite she invites them into the shower and Adam Sandler seems like he's totally into going in there and boning her until he realizes that he has to take his shoes off to go into the shower. And the movie does not treat this as if it was like

a potential rape scene. It treats it as if like, oh, this would have been okay, except for he can't remove his shoes. Yeah, it treats it like you're like, oh yeah, he's finally gonna get some. Oh wait a minute. Oh This shoes even though it's your rules. I mean the joke on her on him really is that she's totally turned on by shoes in the shower Oh, I'm sure she doesn't read what he doesn't know is that her boyfriend always keeps his shoes on when they have sex in the shower Yeah, that's why I had to get a result

It's a constantly getting wet and like all the rows from the shower Mm-hmm It is a complicated women like all the rows from the shower. The fetishes that she's ruining is really nice shoes. Yeah, because what sexier than being able to just cast off luxury as if it didn't matter to you. It reminds me of the story in what it was reading in when Nathan Raven wrote about that book, what like confessions of a video, Vixen or something like that. It was one of those books, it was the book

that's the super groupie, superhead. Where, you're saying gibberish, yeah. She talks about going on a date with Fred Durst, where Fred Durst ordered five meals, five dishes at a restaurant, a little, I killed him all, I killed him all, I killed him all. No, a little bit of some of them and then left, and that she has like, she was so turned on by his

wasting of food because it showed how rich he was. Oh, spreader, stuff, okay. Yeah, not a Robert Durst, the wealthy murderer. All the team probably does order food and not finish. He's very skinny. I like that very succinct description. Like, I'd like to think that he introduced himself. I'm Robert Durst, the wealthy murderer.

He's seen me in the jigs starring Robert Durst. I am very wealthy and I'm a murderer. I am a fan of Limp Biscuit, not a member. Many have made that mistake, but I am the wealthy murderer. I only kill people as opposed to the eardrums of millions as my half-brother Fred does. That's rough. Now, as the humorist will, yes, he is a cousin of mine, as far as I know, he has murdered nothing. The as for dust, that is a thing that gets on items, it is small particles, it has nothing

to do with us. It's what we'll return to someday. You may be sooner because I'm about to murder you. Here's my card and it says, Robert Gerst, murder. Come on, wealthy. Yeah, that's how you file it. So he wears those shoes in the shower, I'm assuming because he has some kind of horrible foot fungus. Yeah, and now Adam Sandler has it because he wore the shoes.

Yeah, but you know, that's the rules of the game. No, I reckon that is the shoe. He, uh, thanks for translating that. Uh, the, he, no, does his mother die before? Well, he also, he uses the shoes to impersonate his long lost dad Dustin Hoffman and give his mother a night of Romance that I hope stops at a He's like right after he almost rapes that woman. Okay, but he hasn't yet gotten into method man's apartment, right? Yeah, okay But that does cut away so we don't know I mean Adam Sandler could have had sex with his mom

So it's really weird his mom is clearly like has dementia. Yeah, there's a moment earlier on when Adam Sandler pulls a purse out of the microwave And it's played for laughs as if we're supposed to like shouldn't even start the microwave It's gonna take forever to cook. Oh, she's here that wears the baby The baby is like in the closet with the coats, I guess. And there's a back in the back. And there's some unpopped popcorn in the crib. There's a what? There was a post to cook the baby.

Cause they're cannibals. Did we not mention that? Originally it was called the cannibler. So he shows up as his dad, gives his mom a night of romance. That's crazy. It involves them laughing, joking. We can only assume having sex

because the next morning... Like reading fucking select passages of edipiss or something. It's an old Jewish couple, so they're probably reading like Neil Simon plays to each other. Then the next morning he wakes up to find that his mother is passed in her sleep, probably because her body couldn't handle the loving that he gave her the night before.

Sweet bone in. Sweet bone in ham. It's got a maple glaze on it. And then they ate in bed after boning. Yeah, you have to make the choice of the daily counter whether you want the sweet bone in or the hot bone in. Sweet bone in is better for old people. Yeah, because it's easier on their gums. Yeah.

And hot, they can't quite handle the spice. No. With their, you know, yeah, because the tours are fucking eyes blue. Yeah. In a little person, you give them spice, they're not going to be able to bend the universe to navigate. Exactly.

They're just going to get blue eyes and fall asleep. What are they gonna have to be fitted for news? Del soon come on they've already outgrown the last one cuz this Dan these are dune jokes. Oh, okay, I just spaced out Just like in dune which is set in outer space On the planet of rakis so dunesberry is an adaptation of dune right? That's right. It's awkward.bury is an adaptation of Dunes, right? Is Zonker the one who's not on the spot? That's why everyone has those crazy noses in it.

Because they're aliens. It's just weird, because they never mentioned like, Iraqis or the House of Traities or anything else. And they talk a lot about modern day politics. So is it a prequel to Dun? Uh, I would be able to say a lot more about this bit of everybody. Make up some stuff about sandworms.

Yeah, maybe Uncle Duke is riding a sandworm. Yeah. Yeah. He made us a tame shy. Maybe he is floating around like that guy does. Baron Harkonen. There you go. Wow.

I don't like his politics. No. No. That's my, that's my attempt at a Doonsbury joke. Now I want to see, okay, Flapphouse fans do it. A Dune, Dune's brain mashup where it's Baron Harcone and is giving a press conference, but there's like a symbol to represent him. Like when, like the floating feather was, was what, Dan Quail? Yeah.

And just like panels of text, it's all, or like, it's a a it's four panels of just the outside of the of Duke of the of Duke Leo's Or Lido. What was the Duke's name Duke Lido? Trades. Yeah, Duke Lido just the four panels of the outside of Duke Lido's compound with word balloons coming out of it about Current you know, they were having trouble with the free man and then a joke at the end All right Morgan Freeman So back to. It's so cobbler. So his mother dies and he sits Shiva and is very upset.

He goes back to work after seven days of sitting Shiva. That's what you do. And probably because he's hankering for a bite of pickles. Yeah. Because there's because there's pickles all over the place. Always walking around with pickles. Well, Jimmy, the barber keeps giving him pickles. No, I know, but like as you were saying, you're wondering whether these are just loose pickles

that he has in the pocket. There are scenes where he's walking, he's in the middle of a mission, he's giving himself. And he's walking down the street just chomping on a pickle. It's like, yeah, just have pickle pocket of pickles. Yeah. Because a pickle pocket is something I wouldn't mind having. Line the inside of your pocket with like some kind of waterproof material. You can put wet pickles in there.

Makes perfect sense. Keep some of your pocket protector, but a pickle protector. Now you're on the trolley. The pickle trolley. It's the best trolley because it smells like pickles. I'm virtually, you're gonna smell like pickles. I mean, my buddy Mark Cuban have a TV show called Shark Tank. It's called pickle tank.

We put you in a tank full of pickles. And you've got a nut drown while eating as many pickles as you can. Let me know this about Mark Cuban, he owns a basketball team. Those people just get desiccated from the salt, Toronto moisture from their body. It's pretty gross. Every now and then, though, so it's pretty good. Don't worry, drink all that pickle juice will give them

uncontrolled diarrhea. It's a reason why critics call it the worst show on television. This is literally torture, says the Justice Department. So he's upset and method man comes in. And this is where the movie takes an abrupt turn from being about a sad loner who is a plotless tale, a plotless tale about a sad loner like infuri doing funny things to choose turning. It takes a turn into becoming a crime comedy thriller drama.

Like they were like, hmm, let's try to make this more of a get shorty type film. Or let's make this more of a like, small time crooks, which is a bad example because it's not very good. But like, let's say, you know, like a crime comedy, you know what I'm talking about? A crime. A crime. They're known as crime. But like what say you know like a crime comedy you know I'm talking about Mm-hmm a cromity Known as cromities because crom is in them the god the god of the Samarians

Mm-hmm But now I want to see a Coney the Barbarian comedy They call it cromity. It's just basically an adaptation of grew I guess you're right. That is just grew Okay, I mean I'm the service started as that too. Yeah. Yeah, okay, good points. And then became a weird anti-woman screw.

You got to understand women are terrible. According to James. David. David. There is my favorite thing about him is when he would write essays about how women are evil, and he would quote the female characters from his stories to as examples of why women are bad.

And it's like, you can't do that. You invented that woman. By the end of it, like, his assistant was drawing so much of it, and I wonder if it was a Gerhard. Well, he did the backgrounds for sure. I wonder if there was a point of which where he was just like, Dave, we talk about this.

I'm through talking. I'm gonna get in a boxing match with Jeff Smith who made bone. Did you remember that? Yeah, I took they never did it, right? He challenged him to it. Because it was super weird. And they both hug you over bowl.

Or, right? And yet Todd McFarlane and Peter David had their debate at the Comic Con years ago. What was their debate about? They just disagreed on a lot of stuff. I think Todd McFarlane showed up in a chicken costume. It was weird. And what's strange is they had worked together years earlier, you know, they should be friends. Sometimes when you reach a certain level of talent, you just can't give along with other people on that same high peak. That's why you got started toy company.

And by Mark McGuire's, Rod Ball. Or did you mean Peter David? No, I was talking about Peter David. Oh, I knew I didn't. So anyway, this is when it takes an abrupt turn into crime territory. Method man comes in and he's very rude to Adam Sandler and demands his shoes. Now really, all that he does at this point to make us not like him is be insensitive

about Adam Sandler's recent death in the family. But. That's a pretty, I don't know, he's such an asshole about Adam Sandler's long time. But does that deserve Adam Sandler's recent death in the family. But. I don't know, he's such an asshole about damn family long time. But does that deserve Adam Sandler then impersonating him and stealing from him and beating him up? We learn he's a bad guy. He's a criminal.

He's a bad person and like a domestic abuser and stuff, but we don't know that. That's the thing when he starts kicking over rocks, we find a bunch of worms. He's a real muck raker. rocks, we find a bunch of worms. He's a real muck raker. Yeah. Careful about what you put those shoes on. You may not like what you find out.

You mean it all depends on whether you think that the cowbler should be a source of vigilante justice. I don't. And that I don't think is. It doesn't matter what you like because that's what you get because he walks around with his bag of shoes that he changes repeatedly.

To become new people. It's like, it is the worst superhero power you could imagine that he has a bag of shoes that allow him to become different people. Including one guy who has is clearly already dead because when he puts on his shoes, he looks like a zombie man. And it smells like one. Yeah, that's what they say. Which makes us understand that this point, if he puts on a dead person shoes, he appears dead. Yes. Also, he can move around and moan like his own, but it's kind of crazy. Ritter Mordis has not said him. That's the one flaw to us.

He should be a dead guy. So he decided to spy on Method Man for a while. And he finds out that he has got a lot of money and fancy watches in his apartment. And he goes to I think he just wants to like teach him a lesson and steal his watches. Yeah. But he's like, you'll never be able to tell time to make your appointments. You'll never know when the shoe repair shop is closing. He's trying to steal the watches so he can't come back the next day to beat him up because he won't wake up in time or something. Yeah, he was, he was a alarm on his fancy watch won't go off and he'll sleep forever and then cut to it's

5,000 years in the future and he wakes up and he's got a giant long beard. Giant guy. And giant conqueror. He's like, I don't just say the name method man anymore because I have no routines. And I'm just man now, the final man. There's a method to my man this. I don't think that we need to get into like all the ends and out. Oh no, he just he finds out that method man is a criminal who works for the real estate

person played by Ellen Barkin, who is trying to kick out Mr. Solomon, the old man. Oh, and we forgot to mention that there's this woman that wants to keep the lower you side, you know, in the hands of small business owners. Keep her weird. Yeah. And she's kind of attainable. Yeah. She is the love interest such as there is in the movie in that she stays.

In a movie that postulates that there is no possibility of love because The straight the person you think is your lover could just be a stranger wearing their shoes That's right. We all wear our shoes some are leather and some are canvas Did you ever see the lover that wear shoes in your house? Thanks. We wear shoes sometimes outside Usually not indoors if we're in our own house. Shoolie Joule. Shoolie Joule.

Billy Shoul. Actually, Shoolie Joule sounds better. Billy Shoul is an Orthodox Jewish education place. Yeah, but this woman is like, you know that she's like the romantic. I'm lacing up. Potential romantically because she's the only one who treats Adam Sandler with any sort of interest, even though he seems like a real dumb ball.

Yeah, she is capable of connecting to him on a human level as no matter how hard he tries not to. So. Well, she has just like this go-go go lifestyle, need somebody like him to keep her grounded. Yeah, this go-go go, go. Charitable small time activists. So now you're a question for you guys. Setting aside the plot, if you had magic shoes that let you be other people, what would

you do with them? What would you do? Let me be Mark Summers for a moment and ask you, what would you do? I doubled there you to answer this question. Well, first off, you started a new question. I'm going to, yeah, I would ask Mark Summers to borrow his shoes. So I could cobble them and then be Mark Summers for a day. Okay.

So you'd be like, what going to double dare fan him? Of course I would. Yeah. I would climb through that giant set of teeth and find the flag. He's allowed to do that, right? Oh, yeah. I mean, if you work there, you can go on all the physical channels. The same way, how if you were an ex-Senator, you still have permission to go on the floor of the Senate when everyone, yeah, by go, I mean, go to the bathroom.

Okay. Well, your center, you can't do it. Once you've left the Senate, you can come back and use the Senate floor as your toilet. Dan, what would you do? Wouldn't you want to be a lady? You sounded like Andy Rooney for a moment. Wouldn't you? Okay, explain. We want to see, like, I just to see what that's like. I mean, like, the one time that it comes close to that is the aforementioned offensive trans humor, because he puts on shoes that turn out to be not lady shoes, but of this uh, But it either, it's some either transgender or restressing individual.

Yeah. Well, he seemed to have, he seemed to have breasts, so it seemed like he was, I don't know, let's who knows who knows. Who knows, look, there's no figuring out the puzzles and enigmas of the cofler. Yeah. But so you would put on a lady's shoes and then what would you do? I don't know, just see what that was like. And haven't you ever wandered?

I guess so. Yeah, I mean, that makes sense, Dan. That's not weird. That's a real walk a mile in their shoes. I gotta get a feeling you're not leaving the house. Evd you put those ladies shoes on? Like, I'm not saying that that I might not take a peek. Take a peek.

But, yeah, if you, it's a rare opportunity, you know? That's true. The sad thing though is that because your feet would be in the shoes, and if you took the shoes off, you would revert back to normal Dan, you couldn't entertain that foot-fated that you had the Dan House. Yeah, I mean, not with his own feet anyway. No, of course not. No, just the feats of his victims.

I guess I said feats, and I didn't mean achievements. So, okay, so this got pretty weird. We got Mark Summers. We got a lady, and then what would Ellie be? I actually had no answer for that. I kind of, I think, hmm. I don't know, just somebody, somebody else.

Yeah, I guess lady makes sense to get a different perspective for the day. The problem is you'd have to find somebody whose shoes are the same size as you are. I wear the same sizes, my wife, problem solved. Yeah, so you, I mean, the thing is, I put on my wife's shoes all the time when I'm too lazy to put on my shoes

to go take the garbage out. So like, I would constantly- Dollar shoes garbage shoes. No. It's because she has a pair of boots I can slip on that are next to the door because they're rain boots and I don't have to lace up my shoes. So I would be constantly turning into my wife

just to take the garbage out. And my neighbors would be like, oh, Dan, yeah, we saw you taking the garbage out yesterday. And she'd be like, I didn't do that. And we'd be like, how dare you? Your husband is so lazy. He makes you take your garbage out all the time. And she'd say, I know, I know.

Mm-hmm. So, do you guys go on zappos and pick out shoes together? No, we don't. I think I'm gonna get these shoes and you're like, I don't think they looked that good on me. No, we don't share shoes that way. We should though, we save us money. You certainly could, yeah.

I mean, if only one of us left the house at a time, we'd only need one pair of shoes. Exactly. Thank you, Volodymyne. All the tens of hundreds of thousands of dollars. Well, that's the thing, that's like that. You're basically throwing money away. It's like we're throwing money in the trash

that I'm taking out when I put my waste rain boots on. So anyway. If I could put on my sun's shoes and see what life is like as a toddler, I would do that because I'm curious about, I can't, because he doesn't wear size men's eight and a half shoes. But he's worried. But and he puts on my size men's eight and a half shoes. But he wears eight. But, and he puts on my shoes all the time

and does not turn into me. But the, like, I would- Yeah, because you don't have a magic cobbling machine. No, but it would be curious to see like, what, how your mind works at that age, which is something I've forgotten. But that's not what happens when you put on the shoes. Yeah, that's true.

You have your same brain. It's like brain chemistry alters. It's, he's not limit-listened chemistry altars. It's he's not limitless. Yeah. So anyway, I kind of want to zoom through the plot mechanics of the crime story to get to the really goofy stuff at the end. Okay, so he finds out that this guy is a crime boss for, or is it is a thug for this crime boss played by Ellen Barkin who is trying to get Mr. Solomon, the old man out of his

building. He comes back and accidentally gets into a fight with method man accidentally kills him by stabbing him in the throat with those stiletto shoes. Tels the cops that... Incidentally. Yeah, accidentally defending himself. Incidentally accident. Tels the cops that he did it and the cops don't believe him.

They think he's crazy. Oh, yeah, magic shoes. One more thing. One more thing. Magic shoes don't exist. Can you explain that? No, I can't. Okay, that's right.

That makes sense. Oh, what? We are magic shoes.'t exist. Can you explain that? No, I can't. Okay, that's right, that makes sense. Oh, what? We all magic shoes, that's right, that's right, that makes sense. I just want more question, why are you wasting my time? And he finds that he has an elaborate plan that he puts together with the shoes to get to get the shoes. He suddenly becomes like a fucking super genius on this shoe. We can figure out a whole con to use the shoes to get have a New York one

reporter catch Ellen Barkin on tape threatening the old man and then do we just skip ahead to the reveal reveal reveals at the end that someone's been helping him out and he doesn't know how the reveal at the end like like Michael Landon show and yeah and it turns out it was Jimmy, the barber next door, who it turns out wasn't Jimmy at all, but his long lost father Dustin Hoffman wearing Jimmy's shoes.

There's been supplying him with pickles because pickles apparently help you when you transition from person to person. Like you lose salt when you transition in the shoes? Otherwise you probably lose yourself in the... In the moment, you own it, you never let it go. That's right. This is your one shot You don't get it. Got to stop

Yeah, it's day otherwise you're striking on it and then that's it's done. Yeah, so it turns out so the last Five minutes to seven minutes this movie are crazy. Yeah, it turns out he's he pickles so you don't lose your DVD copy of salt He needy pickles so you don't lose your DVD copy of Salt. We've changed bodies. Because you're going to want to watch that again. Yeah, like lead-shriver all bad guy. I'll watch it. That's never happened before except in half the movies he's made. lead-shriver plays saver juice.

That's a Taylor main role. A cobbler made role. I think it's Tyler main. I had to say man, he's a wrestler. It's Tyler main and X-Men. It's the Shriverper in X-Men. He doesn't worry. He gets his living by hurling other men around, like a calm and hurl or a calm whatever.

Dave, that's his name now. Starring Kevin Klein as the titular Dave. Anyway, so we're about to do the crazy part where Dustin Hoffman reveals all this time I've been your dad It was never the right time to tell you he reveals that because I've been in danger from something something something He somehow got in too deep with danger with his shoe powers And so he had to hide and go on the lamb as Jimmy the barber and yeah, I think he he was in danger of having to deal with a wife with Tomenche I guess so he's a real heel is what it comes down to.

It's a war pun intended. Oh, right. So Dustin Hoffman reveals that he has a huge hidden layer of famous people's shoes that he uses, I guess, to write wrongs in the world. It's like a weird, like, that Kingsman, the secret service room. Yeah. Like, he has my secret shoes. But without the weird anal sex joke at the end.

Then it opens on to a secret garage where he has a luxury car and a driver and the car has the license plate to Kabul, which, and they get in and he reveals that, oh yeah, all trade, trade craft, craft tradesmen, dry cleaners and things like that, they all have these secret societies. Anyway, there's a lot of danger and a lot of excitement.

Let's go, son, and they drive off into the distance, and that's the end of the movie. The light driver take us to fucking Hogwarts so we can begin his training. So it's like, wait, was the Cobbler just chapter one of a trilogy of movies about the war between the Cobblers and the dry cleaners? Like, why did this not happen at minute 30 of the movie?

Well, that's like, this movie starts off as like this low-key magical building of trilogy. I mean, low-key is not in it. Low-key magical realism movie. Then, although he is kind of like a low-key figure, constantly changing his face. And a trickster. Yeah, it takes a brief turn.

Cheating pickles. Like rabbit or coyote. Takes a brief turn into this crime story, as you say. And then at the end, it seems like there's seven minutes of the superhero movie rabbit or coyote. It takes a brief turn into this crime story, as you say. And then at the end, it seems like there's seven minutes of the superhero movie that we didn't get to see where the cobbler's society is protecting the world against, I don't know. Bad shoes, I guess.

Against dry cleaners. It's going to turn, I bet, I just don't, it feels like there's a better movie where they're using the shoes to, or at least a goofy or movie. Like a goofy movie. Exactly. A goofy movie about goofy and a son connecting Then about a dad and his son using magic's name a goofy dog probably Pluto is not as well Pluto is his son not acknowledged Goofy got drunk one night and head sex with his regular dog and Pluto was bored Is it wait goofy's not a regular dog?

No, he can talk and he wears clothes. Definitely ever seen Stan Byme. This is all covered in the campfire scene and Stan Byme. So you're required reading of a movie. I don't know if the body, the Stephen King story, includes that sequence. So don't read that. Watch the movie.

So there's a Goofy or Fun movie where they're like using the shoes to, like impersonate world leaders, I guess, or but instead that movie is just left to our imagination. And the film is like, yeah, he used, he really learned a lesson about himself from those magic shoes, secret society conspiracy.

We're out, gotta go. Well he says this big thing about how this is, like the shoes that I've made and my father and my grandfather, like all these shoes, but like most of those shoes are dead people. He'll put them on and just be like a zombie. Like I'm the zombie. I'm John F. Kennedy.

No, you're not, you're horrible dead corpse. Ah, just burn those shoes. Yeah, yeah, let's move into final judgments because we're as always. Let's move into the apartment together. All right. I mean, just three guys hanging out. I mean, my piece of place. I got a sofa here. Sofas choice. And the other one, I guess, gets the tub. Yeah, I guess I'll take the tub. I'll take, can I just snooze in that rocking chair, like an old man? I mean, we got all curl up in my bed like three little mice. Yep. And we use a sardine can key to pull up the covers. So anyway, let's do our final judgments. Whether this was a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie.

There's like a single feather that floats above us as we snore. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The movie we kind of like, it's a bad bad movie, I say. It's totally, I hear mine decree. It's totally bonkers. Don't get me wrong. Like it is one of the weirdest movies we've watched. But it's like, it's rare that we watch the movie

other than like, fateful findings where while watching and I'm like, what am I supposed to get from this? Who is this for? Who is the audience? How am I going to get the thing that I would love to see are the like, energetic enough to be. The like, the, like, the acting training where they're like, okay, Adam Sandler's got this great character.

All you are going to be people that he plays when he puts on the shoes. So you're gonna have to act like he acts now. And they're like, he's just like, shoving around. Do we have to do this? I mean, every time it's someone in the shoes playing him, and I was actually, I was a little impressed by the fact that they captured, if not him, then those actors noticeably shifted there. Like, Method Man did a good job

of being two different people in this. But it's like, the director went, okay, once you put this, you're playing out of San Jose character, act like a moron who doesn't know what's going on. And it's not smart enough to pretend he knows. Got it done, okay. Perfect.

Like the real, shiny star in this movie, as far as I'm concerned was Method Man. Yeah. And maybe even Dustin Hoffman, but he's barely in the movie. And Stevie Semi's okay too. You know what, good, good movie. No, I would call this a bad, bad movie, but like, I just wonder what that last scene of the movie

could have been if that had been the movie. It would have been so stupid, but it could have been fun stupid. Yeah. Yeah, whatever you guys said. That's fine. Thanks. The most agreeable man on the biz. Hello, Brent. Travis. Welcome to Trends Like These. What's Trends Like These you ask? Well, it's a podcast where we take the news trending on the internet and we cover it in podcast form. We go beyond the headlines, beyond the memes, to bring you the real story so that when your

friends bring it up, you can look real smart. We take things that need to be debunked and we debunked them and then we take things that need to be re-bunked and we re-bunked them. We bring you all the details and we give you a spin on it, our opinions, our thoughts, and we also try to dig up some positive things to talk about. So it's not all bummers. Just a couple of real life friends talking internet trends. So join us every Thursday on MaximumFun.org and wherever podcasts are found. So we have a sponsor this week. Woo!

Yeah, the flop house is supported in part by Squarespace, the simplest way to create a compelling website from the strange to the downright bizarre, great stories to find us. Now, can I give you an example of a strange or downright bizarre website? Yeah, why not? I'll allow it. It's an idea that I've been working on. And it's called, okay,

this is called Warner HurtsogsUrethra.com. Now, a lot of people are familiar with the work of Warner Hurtsog. But are we familiar with how well he pees? I'm not, and I want to investigate it. And that's what Warner HurtsogsU you're ether.com will be all about. Now maybe it's a nonprofit, Werner Herzogs, you're ether.org,

but until I figure, maybe it's an educational site.edu, I'm afraid that I'm not- Probably not a government site. Yeah, unless I can get the funding. Yeah, Werner Herzogs, you're ether.org, there.gov would be fantastic. But I'm just worried that I'm not going to be able to get.com. I'm going to be stuck with we're her side as you read through a.net.

Now would Squarespace help me to put this site together fast? I don't know how to code. Yes, that's what Squarespace is square space is about. Okay, tell me more. Squarespace is a feature of a service that helps you build delightful websites without having coding information and or information, coding ability. And why be able to, does it have some ability for me

to look at it on my cell phone as opposed to just my desktop? Yeah, that's a good question. I want people to see where her talk to yourether.com on both their iPad, iPhone, on the go, and on the stay. Squarespace scales beautifully across all platforms, guys. I'm both their iPad, iPhone, on the go and on the stay. Squarespace scales beautifully across all platforms, guys. That sounds great.

That sounds amazing. It almost sounds like it has responsive design. Now, is there some kind of help desk or something I could talk to for extra help? Probably. You're going way off the company. You're asking me questions that are not actually in here. Okay, well tell me what that are not actually in here. Well, okay.

Well, tell me what you do know about Squarespace. Well, I should say, I can talk again. They do have, and they do have help, but could do. They do have help, but I can just read what was provided too, which says that that's what a professional would do. I mean, a tale. A tale of Squarespace, Dan. Sing me a song of Squarespace.

Squarespace, the place for websites. Cause we've all got to do things on the internet. And some of us aren't doing it right. Squarespace, Squarespace, Squarespace. Squarespace, define us. You should. Squarespace, you should tell yours.

Squarespace, with simple tools and templates. Square Space helps you capture your story with a captivating website. And you can start your free trial today by visiting squarespace.com slash flop. Squarespace.com slash flop as in flop house. Yeah. You should. Squarespace. So that's thank you to Squarespace for their continued support of the blog. Thank you very much. Without Squarespace. Apologies for me getting flustered in the middle of that commercial. We're all very passionate about Squarespace. It's hard. Clearly. I know that I was poking fun a little bit at websites and I know you took that very seriously because Squarespace,

you believe, and I believe too took that very seriously because Squarespace, you believe, and I believe too, and I'm sure Superb believes, is a valuable service provided at a very good price, especially when you go through the flop address, squarespace.com slash flop. And so, I apologize, I shouldn't have been so flippin' with it. That being said, I also love websites. If you're interested in new, I love the internet. That being said, if you're interested in news reviews, fan fiction, or how-to tips about Werner Herzog's Urethra. Stay tuned because I think that's not that I think you're going to like. I just want to mention that the Flapp House is now up on the Max Fun jumbo

Tron where you can have us do a personal or a commercial message for you. Personal messages, we offer for $100. And commercial messages for $200. And you just go dependably priced. Very much so. You go to, these are one off messages. On the jumbo tron. On the jumbo tron. Max Fun jumbo tron.

And you can go to. Kiss cam. Kiss guys are on the kiss cam. I hope nobody was eating well listening to this episode. But if you wanna get up on the jumbo tron, you can go to maxbunfun.org forward slash jumbo tron and submit a message through the online form there. And we can get you on the podcast.

We've had a lot of, in the past, promotions for other podcasts or people who want to do a shout out for birthdays. And for the most part, we've been delighted to do those things, but we get so many of them that it seems like the best thing to do is to sort of monetize that honestly. Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. Be a serious businessman.

Route that through the jumbo tron. So if you have a personal or a commercial message, you can go maxemplon.org for slash jumbo tron. It could be as simple as, hey, Sherry, happy birthday, or as complicated as. Hey, hey, Sherry, happy birthday, or as complicated as... Hey, Barry, happy death day. In which case, people would be like, what's that all about? It could be as innocent and personal as, I love you and pregnant.

I don't, this is a weird way to send that message, but you could do that. Or as mercenary as, by this, and it'll make your penis grow four to five inches. And I know that's right. 45 inches of growth. 45 inches of growth. Yeah, and it's all through natural herbs and fibers. Just write me and I'll tell you about it. I know we're getting long here, but just like your penis will be with my method.

One serious thing to note before we get into letters. Is this a letter about, oh, never mind. Art, you dropped some stuff. No, this is about our charity drive. Oh, yes, please do. So a while back around the holidays, I mentioned my admiration for the McElroy's and their charitable efforts.

And I said that we should do something along those lines. I remember I think you're exactly right. I remember we should do something charitable. Go do something charitable, fans. No, but we had been thinking behind the scenes like how can we codify that into something a little more. If I can, let me just, I can tell people what it was like, I believe you said,

ooh, those McElroy boys are getting all the credit Dan wants some of the Samaritan bucks Was that sounds like you just you just pay some equipment from that show But we were thinking about how we could best Do this and Stuart had talked about maybe we could do a contest where people who donate could get to choose what movie we watch, which would be a good contest for people. In the past we've had a lot of contest that involved. Yeah, that came up drawing or making a song and for people whose talents don't lie there, this would be a good way of giving them a chance to maybe choose a movie.

Finally, the non-creative can choose. And then after we're just good at math or writing? Yeah, sure. And after last week, breaking and saying, guys, after last week where we got the very sad news that someone, a listener of the show, had killed themselves. There was sort of an organic movement that sprung up on the Flophouse Facebook group to do a charitable drive for suicide prevention. And so, and that was totally separate from what we had already been thinking about, but

that was great. And we thought, why not go on with that. Yeah, it makes sense. Use that for the contest. So there's now the Rocket Crocodile Action Squad raising money for Suicide Prevention. And I will put up the link to that on the website for this episode. And you can go there and donate if you see fit. And if you don't want to donate anonymously, if you want to put your name in, you will be entered into the contest to take a movie for us.

And so, forces to watch any movie that isn't nothing but trouble. If it's because, if it's nothing but trouble, then this will become a double murder and suicide by me killing you guys. Yeah. I want to, I should send a special shout out thanks to Shannon Camp, who really set up the details of the, I mean, she was really the driving force behind it.

And we, because we were dragging our feet on our side of things. Well, it was, it was difficult for us to find a cause that felt like something that we, that was organic, like you're saying, like something that was, we, that made sense with what we do. And I'm so, it's something. I know, like I had a suggestion that we start a charity to hire people to go

by DVD copies of 40 Days and 40 Nights and throw them all away. And we gave that some strong consideration. Yeah, there was also that ding dong ripping off charity that you wanted to found, which I think I think you have to rip off more of them. And it's something that I'm surprised we didn't think of it only because each of us has had problems with depression at some point or another. A lot of our fans have talked to us about their, to us about this show getting them through tough times similarly.

It's a thread line that runs through many communities, but very much through the nerdy geek community and to the creative community. And I feel like that's where our Venn diagram meets. And so it makes sense. Yeah, so anyway, the link will be up on the website for Rocket Crock Values action squad, please, if you feel so moved, donate a little to suicide prevention. But now... Stuart, stop playing with the bottle capsule. Dan talks about the suicide prevention charity thing. I was just thinking about charity that brings out the worst to us. Not only in Stuart and me. I was just thinking about charity that brings out the worst to us. Not only instorting me, Dan, you've been doing real good. Real good. Thanks buddy.

You've been doing real good. Alright. Dan knows that we're getting rid of him. Right? Yeah. This is the last one. But now that. Real good.

Hope that sweatshirt feels nice. You're going to need it when you're out on your ass. Like, this is this? Why would this sweatshirt? We in such, that would be so helpful. Because it's cold out there. Do you want to wear a sweatshirt when you're out out the cold? Dan's wearing a sweatshirt.

Is the back story to that? There are other classic podcast visual gag. So now we can move on to letters from listeners. listeners write letters and we read them ringering ringering ringering ringering ringering ringering ringering. What's that sound? What's that sound? What's that sound? It's the letters alarm bell. The letters alarm bell telling us that letters have come through the slot in the door. What are those letters for reading to you from from us to you, from you to us. Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling, Ling,

It's that letter alarm bell. Time for everyone to run to the door and pick up some letters. Open them up, read them, get better. You're sick. I'm sorry that I had to tell you this way. In the form of a letter song, This is the hardest part of my job. Ring, ring, ring, ring, the letters alarm. Letters time.

Thank you, Elliot. Letters are brought to you by mailman. Accurate. It's actually accurate. So this first letter is from Bryn Lasting with Held. Who writes. David Bryn.

Dear floppy bunnies. Sometimes I think it'd be used anthropomorphic bunnies. Ellie is especially cute in my head. Anyway. It's nibbling on Clover. I've kind of a serious question. I have a music review comedy YouTube show. It's something we do for fun.

We both have real jobs and passions. But sometimes I find that finding time, figuring out which record we wanna review, what the sketches are gonna be, et cetera, can be kind of stressful. And there have been times when me and my co-host get in real tips over the silly thing we do for fun. So I'm wondering, do you guys ever get annoyed or frustrated in your real lives

about things related to putting the show together? Are we ever not annoyed? Does Dan actually get hurt by Elliot's incisive mocking of Dan's reading skills? Does Elliot actually get frustrated by Elliot's incisive mocking of Dan's reading skills? Does Elliot actually get frustrated by Stuart's constant ding dong references? Does Stuart truly get creeped out by Dan being a huge pervazoid? I'm spitballing here. Have you had serious conversations about emotions that come up in around the show? Any you're willing to talk about? That's from our chat. We get irritated with each other all the time about stuff. We're chasing it. We're chasing it. We're chasing it. We're chasing it.

We're chasing it. We're chasing it. We're chasing it. We're chasing it. We're chasing it. We get irritated with each other all the time about stuff. We actually haven't had too big an emotional conversation. I think it helps that you guys don't work together anymore.

I think it definitely helps. I think the fact that Dan and I are no longer in a boss and or a manager staff member situation certainly helps. I think the fact that we lose the boss. Mona and what were Tony, I think, not a job of them though. Things weren't really helped out that much when we hired the therapist from some kind of monster

that Metallica went to. That really didn't help, but I think in some way is our lives getting more complicated and difficult has made the problems with the podcast that we might have between each other minimize. Yeah. They get put in perspective at least. It's the only time I feel alive, guys.

Was I frustrated that a long time Dan wouldn't move the recordings from Wednesday to Thursday, even though I was, it would have meant I had more sleep and more time with my family. Yes. And that he then decided after I left that job that, you know what, Thursdays are better for him. Let's move it to Thursdays. But I didn't bring it up. No, no, no, no.

That's not what happened. No, no. I decided that like, oh yeah, you know what? It was better than I was putting out today. That's Dan's rationale for why we couldn't, because on Wednesdays, I had to stay at work late to take the Daily Show Global Edition. Then Thursday morning, I got to get up early.

Whereas on Friday, I can sleep in a little bit. Dan's rationale for not going to do it Thursdays, though, was that that was the night he kind of liked to set aside for his social events because he could sleep in a little on Friday. It's a big social night. But Dan, I didn't irritate him anymore. Now, I think it's got a funny. And likewise, I'm constantly irritated by these two knuckleheads for reasons that I think should be help you to clear to anyone who has listened to the podcast.

But I thought you do all the work, we get all the credit, we interrupt you when you try to do nice things. Yeah, sometimes when I'm riding on you guys' co-tales, you don't drag me along fast enough. That's kind of irritating. But you guys be more successful and famous so I can just glide along behind you. I'm trying. But every any time you're doing something creative with another person, there's gonna be tensions.

The tensions in a way get more so when it's a friend. Yeah. Because there's that implication that there shouldn't be. I can't just fire you. Yeah. And you wanna be on a good terms with this person. So you can't argue or talk out the way you would otherwise. But also, if you're doing it for no money,

there's that extra little bit of pressure because you're like, this should be fun. Why am I frustrated with it? Because it's work, but it's just inevitable. Yeah. And your production will be better for it or worse. I don't know you, but we're, you know, but we're not breaking up, guys. We know we're breaking bad. Dan's not wearing pants and he's cooking up math right now.

Look, it's my next delicious baking experiment. You got up to him and the A to Z baking book and it's a math. All right, gotta follow the book. But no, we're not breaking up at all. So this next letter from Alex last name withheld, who writes, it is with a kind of like your movies. It is with relatively bridled glee that I would like to point out

that during a rare television appearance, Ellie, it said something dumb. I say dumb stuff all the time. Do you listen to this podcast? In John last name with Hell's final episode on a daily show, Ellie's appearance featured him discussing a theory about job of the Huts potentially insensitive nickname. Ellie claimed it's a general nationalistic title, i.e. Jimmy the Greek, sensible, if insensitive. This is backed up by the appearance of other huts and the extended Star Wars universe such as the hilariously bearded and

Unoriginally named Zorba the Hut Titchler star of Zorba the Hut's revenge Which is the one that has all the where's the makeup? That's the lady hut right lady the hut Sister of pizza Yes, so what did I say that was so dumb well Elliot? Now the mom of the system of pizza. Yes. So what did I say that was so dumb?

Well, Elliott, you have been rendered retroactively wrong by Mickey Mouse. The extended Star Wars universe is no longer canon. Job of the Hut is now only Hut, similar to his fellow public actor Yoda, the Yoda, as such, the title is referenced to his status as the only one of his kind. Slimey is away across the universe and a lonely Kung Fu existence. Millions of people tuning in for landmark television, bore witness to Elliot's wrongness. Dan Stu, thank you for being consistently correct. Your consistently correct contributions to the Flapphouse community.

Wait, I'm saying you. Alex, let's go. I don't understand. I'm not sure I will follow the logic either. Wait, so when the extended. Alex, let's go. I don't understand. I'm not sure I will. I'm not sure I will. So wait, so when the extended universe was rendered or non-void, what they're saying is that job of the hut is now the only one of his species. But what about when he goes to be the MC at that pod race or the guest of honor?

There's another hut there. Yeah, I don't know what, and also how does that change what the hut means? Yeah, yeah, you know what? You know and also how does that change what the hut means? Yeah, yeah, you know what you know what I have to have a longer conversation It's gonna be on the walk home from dance I Wanted the opposite side of this Argument but I still think that I think that your argument doesn't make sense my argument. No, this letters. Oh, yeah

I think that that argument is so you're saying that this letter is Oh, this letter is not your ally. I apologize that I got distracted there I had to hurl again from my lap. You don't despite the cat then do an icky shuffle There's a couple times during recording these episodes now where Dan's cat not only nudges me But jumps on me with its claws digging into my clothes and I don't like that Dan Yeah, I would say declaw your cat, but that's cruel to the cat. It's like cutting off a cat's fingers. Don't do that. But maybe like...

Yeah, your cat's not, it hasn't wronged the Yakuza. No, maybe get like a mannequin of me wearing my clothes and put something your cat doesn't like on it, so it learns to stay away from me. Yeah, I do. It's your cat not like. Loud noises? Okay, I can't be louder. It's impossible

humanly. The problem is our she is too much love to give. Well, I have enough love in my life. But now, so yeah, letter writer, write back in Alex and explain what you're saying because I don't quite understand. This last letter is quite a letter. I'll just okay. Is this the type of letter that we shouldn't interrupt you because we'll feel bad afterwards? No, it's not that kind of letter. Okay. Although, I would say that it's sad news, but sad news delivered with a lot of a lawn and flair. Okay. So, I'll just, I'll just read it. I'm disappointed to announce that I'm rescinding my invitation to my April wedding that you were debating actually coming to.

What? It's not that I love you guys any less. You've helped me pass the hours during some terrible times and some great times. But I've ended my engagement. We had some irreconcilable differences. The main one being that we disagreed on whether I found it okay that he's still married to his first wife. the main one being that we disagreed on whether I found it okay that he's still married to his first wife No, I'm not the protagonist the last years underappreciated horror thriller Crimson Peak Nor my Humphrey Bogart from Casablanca and in comparison to those people I'm doing pretty well But I am bummed that I will not have the honor of meeting you at an expensive reception that my family would be paying for You're by no means obligated, but if you read this letter on air, I would appreciate it.

And it's okay because my ex-fiancé never really got into the show. I did try. And even if he does hear this, he knows what he did. Hint. He lied about being divorced. Keep on flopping in the free world. First name withheld. Last name withheld. I'm going to say that- And people say that there's no follow-up in journalism anymore. that people say that there's no follow up in journalism anymore. They do say that. Do they? I'm going to say that I had a friend who I will not identify who also had a broken engagement and with the engagement being called off a few weeks, not for the same reason, but for a similarly not excusable reason that was called off a few weeks before the wedding.

And I'm going to say the same thing now that I said then which is It's a painful thing, but better to have it done now than later when it's when your life has become so much more complicated by being Further entangled with this person. So I'm not glad that you had to go through that But I'm glad I have to when it did divide up like his and hers towels Isn't hers salt and pepper shakers. Yeah, or if you had a child before this came out, you know, like that's the kind of thing I'm thinking about where your life is now. That's more complicated than my life.

Much more complicated. I'm just amazed by the telenovela style life that our listeners are living apparently. It's certainly more exciting than my life. Yeah. Now that I can flay, I'm triply blessed. Well, I still are you're a polygamist. So you've got a couple of families stashed around the country. What, you win.

Well, you just got to keep trading up, you got to keep hiring, hire, I guess, finding younger ones, I keep hiring your wives. Now, I see on your resume, you just put down good wife. Does that mean you have to show the good wife or you would be a good wife? Is that what your hobby, special interest?

Whatever it takes to get me the job. Like, well, I like that. So you didn't put this down, but plus is your go-getter. Under weaknesses it says, you care too much. That's a bullshit weakness. Your under weaknesses you wrote down perfectionist. Now I can see what you're trying to do here. This is high standards too hard on myself. Under weaknesses you should have put liar. It's okay that doesn't disqualify you from the job because frankly the headshot was the most important part

Your ability to shoot somebody in ahead and a lot of this That was what the job was. Are you hiring wanted? Yeah, yeah, you need to be able to bend this crazy wailing bullet It's been scrimshot. Yeah, you have a big tattoo of a tiger on your back. Okay, great. Let's talk You got to be able to bend this bullet by, I guess, sort of throw them the gun around. Yeah, you ready? You ready to reme-lo-bo when you're armed or when you're armed?

Are you willing to take orders from a magic tapestry making machine? Okay, let's talk. What a crazy comic book that was. That's not even in the comic book. I love it, they're like, this thing is too much about superheroes. Let's change it.

Well, of course we're putting the magic loom in. Sure. Kids love looms. They love looms. They can't get enough old time you're living. We're living the left. There's wolves probably too. So I guess we're sorry about your engagement.

It is the take of what you mean. That's a mix. Yeah, it's a mix. It's a bad thing to go through, but a good thing to have happen rather than the alternative of being in a relationship that is, I guess, invalid or illegal, but you don't know it, you know. Yeah. But that is crazy.

But hey, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Set a crazy German. Wait, is that Katy Perry? Yeah, it was a word of her choice to reason. Oh, okay. Wait, is that Katie Perry? Yeah, it was one of her times the reason. Okay. So thank you for all the letter writers out there. Out there in the letter land.

Yeah, we're going to close up that letter bag, and we'll see you next time. Tying it shut. There's more letters in there, but we don't have time to read it right now. Tie it tight. Tie it shut or the letters get out and they'll hurt you at night. When you're sleeping, vulnerable, alone in your bed, letters come up and creep onto your head. And nobody knows what happens next,

except that your body's found under a bridge covered in stamps. Nobody knows, but the letters. Shhh, tie that back tight. So now is when we recommend movies that we actually like in contrast to the Cobbler, which was excrement. Wow, a harsh statement from a man who's never made a movie himself. Yeah. Doesn't know what the pressures are like. I love you, Tom, McCarthy. You're a good man.

You've done a lot of good work. You give him a thumbs up. I mean, come on. Yeah. So, Dan, why don't you fire this piece up? Sure. I watch for a log on this bonfire. I watched for the first time.

I finally got around to watching the deer hunter. Oh, OK. Well, that's about magic shoes, right? Yeah. It's about a magic bullet that goes through someone's head in the game, impression, really wet. Well, spoiler alert. Sure. Yeah. And then no, I'm not going to make a back into the left joke. But this is a movie that I avoided watching for a very long time, primarily because it's like three hours and fifteen minutes long. And it took me having a long weekend to get around to it. It just happened to be on Turn Classic Movies. And I don't know why I waited so long.

It's a long movie. It is long, but I found it pretty engrossing all the way through. Actually weirdly I found the last third the least engrossing just because I kind of knew from years and years of spoilers where it was all headed whereas the first two thirds are you know sort of unexpected. The first third in particular I actually found really interesting where it just was a very long ethnic wedding in this small industrial town and it did that 70s thing that movies seem to have forgotten. It's the same thing in that. I don't know.

Is it all the characters just going to sit really close to the camera and the camera pans around each of their faces while they say something I did that thing that only each other dumbass What not? I did that thing that movie seemed to have forgotten you fly Bobby boy That thing that movies seem to have forgotten how to do where the characters get introduced through action and through suggestion As you get to know them rather than just characters explaining suggestion as you get to know them rather than just characters explaining what they're doing.

But Jimmy, you were a cobbler. The Saturday Night Live impression thing where it's like, hey, it's me. TV's Michael Cain. TV's Michael Cain. Okay, I'm going to give you a couple notes on that impression. One, he's not really known for his television work if he's ever done any. Two, it's not in Muralink Jimmy Stewart. I'm nervous about doing a Michael Cain impression anymore because I was working on my racist

Michael Cain impression based on his not all white Oscars comment. I don't know what he said. Just wait, just wait, just. Wow. That's awful. I feel bad about impersonating my propane. I played Happy Brown. I know what life is like for brown people.

It's terrible. You have to be an old man vigilante. Oh man, it's a bummer. Something something dark night rises. He is an old English man. So I do not expect a high level of racial. You'll just have to pick your shoves back up. I'm actually moving.

I'm going to go night, you king's a man, you're purchasing a new England or whatever the line is. Here are the abortion orvenage. Abortion orvenage. I see you're following some side-house rules. And the money's not here, it's in the side-house, in Bills House. The house of mouse. No, okay, that's right. But yeah, Deer Hunter got some great performances from the- Oh, you're the Deer Hunter. Robert and Ero, Christopher Walken, beautiful cinematography. It's quite an experience and it's well worth the investment of

time. Anyone else? Yeah, I earlier this week, I went to an early screening of a movie that should come out the day before this podcast comes out, a movie called The Witch. It's pronounced The Witch, although it's spelled with two capital Vs instead of a capital W. And it's a period piece, set about a hundred years before the Salem Witch Trials, and it's set in New England. And it's very true to the time period. There's a lot of effort made to like, have the characters who are in English family

who've come over from England, all like they sound and they act like an English family. Their clothes are all hand stitched. It's a very atmospheric movie that's big on like a build up and a slow pace and the score is great and there's definitely some scares. It's kind of interesting because it's a movie that is being kind of pitched just like the next like super scary movie and it's it's just it's so slow and atmospheric that I'm kind of surprised like I think some people will be disappointed But I thought it was great and it was scary and for a first time for a first feature from this director

It was very confident and really interesting So if you like your horror to be fairly like thoughtful and interesting, I would go check it out. No dummies apply. Yeah, leave your, it's not a checker brain at the door. It's take your brain and say, I'll be keeping this please. Oh, no, I won't check this. I'll take it to my seat. And it's not because you're trying to save on a tip.

No, I mean, you can still tip them. Although if you're using your brain, you're like, that money's better spent somewhere else. Like the concession stamp. I'm gonna recommend a movie that it's going to be a slightly weird recommendation if only because it's an une... It's a shoe. The couple really inspired me to think more about shoes. So watch it.

I mean, it's a shoe that you can just look at. I recently watched Chirac, or Chirac Spike Lee's most recent movie, which written by Aristophanies. Well, yes, somewhat it's based, it's a remake or adaptation of Lysastrata about the violence. Remake of Lysastrata. It's a remake of Lysastrata. Spike Lee's always war, his Ken Russell influence pretty strongly. We all remember the layer of the black worm, his take on layer of the white worm. But it's about the inner city violence in Chicago.

And there are some things about it that are fantastic. Like as a piece of agit prop, it's really good. And unfortunately, as the, there's a certain point where the movie kind of runs out of steam and then keeps going. And he's made his point so well that it weakens the point a little bit. There are some scenes because it's an adaptation of Lycistraut a lot of the scenes are in verse and the way that's handled is really well. And in many cases, you're a scene will start and you'll be like, oh, like the verse is so subtle

at this part that I didn't even notice for a couple minutes that this was written in verse. And other times, the verse is very obvious on purpose. Samuel Jackson has a kind of narrator character in it and I guess is taking the place of a chorus. And he's really fantastic in it. The performers are really good in it and the scenes that are really good in it are really good.

There's an opening scene at a club where one of the characters is performing. And the way that that's handled and the way that the dancing of the people watching the show is handled, you're like, oh yeah, I forgot that Spike Lee is like masterful when he wants to be with like film technique.

Like this is a guy who knows movies inside and out and can do whatever he wants with them. It just so happens that like what he's saying is more important to him than how he says it. And so there are certain scenes in it where I was watching it and I was like, is this like a college sketch comedy video? Because it's like there's certain scenes where I was like, this is a terrible scene and why is this happening. And other ones where it was really powerful because it was well made and other scenes that were really powerful even when they had problems. So it's a really uneven movie and it has its own issues in that, in theory, I guess it's

about female empowerment and women using their power over men in a way that they wouldn't usually accept that the women still, most of them are dressed up in sexy army outfits for a lot of the movie. And they do a lot of dance moves where they slap their butts in front of the camera. So it's like, there were times when I'm like, Spike Lee, I don't know if you're as female empowerment as a regular.

But it's just like, I found, even though it was not, it's an uneven movie. I found it to be a very powerful viewing experience. And that just that it gets the point across so strongly, but like this is a big problem that no one really is doing much about the violence in the United States and specifically violence targeting black people

either by regular people or police or whoever, by regular people, I mean non-policemen. But it's It's worth a watch if you can like sit through the scene. There's a scene where the Lycestrada Seducis an army general into letting her take control of a of a military base And I that was the main scene where I was watching it I was like what the fuck movie is this like this is spike.'ve been really, this has been a really good movie up to now. Like I don't understand, like this scene is terrible. But then it picks back up again.

Let me just coax your thumb over to the fast forward button. I mean, it's, I'm, I never, I'm not a huge fan of people like skimming movies, but this is a movie where you could probably, if a scene is really bad, then just like skip to the next scene, but like watch all the way through, it's one of those movies too, where... It's why DVDs are broken down chapters. I guess so, but you can only watch it on Amazon Prime.

Oh man. Or elsewhere, I'm not sure. But the, it's worth watching. It's worth sitting through the uneven parts. But you might, there may be scenes where you're like, why am I watching this? That's a good movie, it's powerful. Okay, three non-qualified recommendations.

I mean, this one is, it's only qualified because there are parts where I'm glad I went through it, but was like, this scene should have been cut, or this thing should not be happening. Yeah. So that's the show for another week. Yeah. Another half month.

Thanks again to our network Max Fun for producing a bunch of shows and that are great. Please check out the other Max Fun videos. They just add a whole bunch of new shows like Travis and Teresa McElroy's new Manor's podcast, Shmanner's, which teaches you how to be a better person. Yeah. Well, how to be a more polite person. Yeah, well also added to be a better person Also added a trends like these which pre-existed but another Travis Mac like basically their old Travis Macroly joints these days Yeah, yeah, these the busiest man of podcast fingers and all kinds of pod pies Rose chicken pod pie podcasts

They're gonna have a podcast about pies tomorrow Uh-huh. Gross. Chicken pod pie. Pod casts. They're gonna have a podcast about pies tomorrow. I get why not? It can be. If pipers can be pie, why can't casts? We can have a pencil out of leaves. This way you can go leaves on his legs, then we can have a podcast about pie. Take that, Lynn Manuel Miranda.

That's gonna sound like so much gibberish to anyone who did not listen to the Odd Life of Timothy Green. Or pause the podcast. Go back. No, I mean, you gotta keep listening. Don't bother yet. Listen to your directions. You gotta go queue up the Odd Life of Timothy Green episode of our podcast.

And listen to it. And you come back. And then listen to it. And then like do the 15-second rewind thing. And do it again. Just do it three times. Just do it three times. Okay.

Okay. Do it to the beginning of this episode and now listen to the episode again. Yeah. But when you get to that point, really enjoy that joke. Just like really like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like this podcast. Yeah, then throw your phone in the lake. Mm-hmm. You give up, child. You were listening to your laptop, though. That was a great. Throwing in the lake anyway. Shove it off a table like you were Neil Brin. Mm-hmm. And just go live, man.

Yeah, just take that laptop, sprinkle some ground beef, some lettuce, make some cheese, a little bit of sour creams. That's a taco supreme at that point. With a laptop on it. And then eat it. Go run through the field towards your love. You know, or just see where he's been waiting there for you. Walk through a wheat field just kind of grazing the wheat with your fingers, gladiator style.

Oh, you're probably dead. Oh boy, that's because you're in heaven. Well, glad the flop house is playing in heaven. Yeah, right at our feedlejuice is playing at the number one podcast all over heaven. Just sparks reference. Uh, but anyway, this is playing at heaven. You're dead. Why did the movie phone guy tell me I was dead?

It's like there was twist. Do you guys see the John Mulaney Netflix special? There's a part where a subtitle was timed incorrectly. And so in the middle of a joke, randomly a subtitle just comes up that says, you will die on like April 7th, 2038. And I was like, what the hell was that? And I did so much googling to find out what just happened. Because it was for a moment, I was like, my Netflix didn't just tell me when I'm actually going to die, did they? And I started thinking about how am I gonna use this time now that I know I only have this

much amount of time. Yeah, it's like the Scatman Clouds Disculptor. Yeah, exactly. That's terrifying. It was really scary in a way that a rational person would not really be scared by, but I was. So on that really creepy note, I guess that note of just quiet and dismay. I mean, it's just a warning. If you watch John Lee's special, that subtitle is just placed wrong.may. I mean, it really just a warning if you watch generally,

especially that subtitle is just placed wrong. It's not the Netflix is not telling you when you're going to die. Well, it's okay. So it's a public service announcement against a disquiet and dismay. Yeah. Don't be disquieted or dismayed. But thanks for listening for the Flapp House. I've been Dan McCoy. I'm still steward Wellington. And I'm elite Kallen unless I die on the day Netflix told me I would

At somebody else so that Netflix can't find you and kill you. Oh, I'm getting tan give me your shoes so I can beat you You put on my shoes. You'll be me. All right Zapp You close fell off You should stay down though, it's cool. So you have Dan's way now. Still, let's be in this fountain, figure it out. Oh, we're kind of beers you got this time, Modellos.

Yep. A special meaning that they are... They are... ...uspecial. They're e-special. That's like Erin E-Sherens. Yeah. A cartoon character I want to have sex with.

That's the E-Sherens mascot. Yeah, she's that mascot that... Is she the one who's a spy? Yeah, that she's the one that I think they dropped because they're... They dropped because there was too much porn on the internet about her. Hey, that's the risky run when you have a sexy curtain mascot. It's like Sped Kavalka, that was okay with it. Maximumfund.org

Comedy and Culture, Artist Owned. Listener supported. Hi, I'm Brian Safi. And I'm Erin Gibson. And we have the Throwing Shade Podcast. On Throwing Shade, we look at an issue-important to ladies and an issue-important to gay people and then we basically make fun of that.

Yeah, and just to answer your question, no we don't have a marriage pact but if we don't get married by the time we're 30 we're going to do that each other. No, that's true. Okay. We have each been divorced three times. you