The Flop House - Ep. #200 - Nothing but Trouble

Episode Date: March 19, 2016

It's the moment we promised would never happen: we watched Elliott and Dan's stated least-favorite movie of all time, Nothing but Trouble. (Don't worry - despite Elliott's joking claim that if we ever did this film it would be our last, this is NOT our final episode). And to help us out with this special MAX FUN DRIVE episode (donate!), we welcome self-proclaimed minor television celebrity, Mr. John Hodgman. Meanwhile, Elliott breaks out his "Jane Campion accent, Stuart reveals his popcorn secrets, And Hodgman joins in at making fun of Dan's pronunciation. Movies recommended in this episode: The StingWitchtrapBroadcast NewsThe Housemaid

On this episode we watch. Don't do not. No watch. No, no. We watched a movie called. No, I can't even bear it. Nothing but trouble. Nothing.

But trouble. Nothing. But trouble. My tummy hurts. I've never felt more repulsed by a film. Hey everyone, welcome to the flop-ass. I'm Dan McCoy. When do you start talking? I start talking now.

Oh, okay, so wait. I'm going to create a podcast. You're right. It's tight ship. Stuart, what's your name? My name is Stuart Wellingtown. I'm Elliot Kaelin. I'm Joan Hodgerman.

I don't think that's correct. That seems right. That's right folks. Famous comedian, John Huggabokin. Hodgaman. It's pronounced. Excuse me, and, excuse me, unsolicited caller. It's pronounced Hodgaman. John Hodgman is my name. And special guest, John Hodgman is my name and special guest John Hodgman is here for a two big reasons two big reasons yeah it's our 200th episode 200th and already you've got the gist of the podcast dance stupid mouth says something wrong and we jump a lot of about you've done 200 of these I mean I don't know if we're gonna make it to 300 remember back when our first hundredth episode happened and it is also Max Fund Drive. The time of year when we come with Hatten Hand to ask

you for a little scratch to keep the silly thing going. It's so itchy. Having just watched that film, I'd prefer to avoid all humor involving skin disorders. Having just watched that film, I'd prefer to avoid all humor involving skin disorders. You don't mind. So yeah, can you tell me about the Max Fund drive day? Yeah, sure. If it's a little thing that just funds a whole network, Stewart. Okay.

I can't mad at Stewart about it. And that's our network, right? Yeah, Max Fund. Maximumfund.org. And that's John's network. It is. Yes, I also have a podcast called the Judge John Hodgemon podcast. This is not the place to plug that in a propriozer.

What's that? I don't think so that the judge John Hodgemon podcast may not be mentioned on the flop as I give you guys a lot of love on my podcast. Yeah, let's do some traffic over there. Yeah, let's just when I say that your podcast is my mortal enemy, why don't we just hit the switch that creates a detour so people stop listening to this podcast and go to this evil podcast out the world.

No, the point, look, we are, we are all brothers and sisters in the shade of maximum fun. And so it is important once a year that we turn to you, the listener and say, it costs money to do what we do. And we hope that you would consider if you enjoy this podcast, and I don't know why you would. But many of you do to go to maximumfund.org slash donate, and toss a little, some coins our way. It could be as low as $5 a month

and being a pledge person donor. It could be as $1 million a month. That would be amazing. If you're a crazy billionaire, I'm not even gonna say eccentric billionaire, I'm gonna say schizophrenic billionaire. Why not spend a million dollars a month on us? And in addition to getting access to bonus episodes like other things

we've done in all the other bonus episodes for all the other shows on the network. Hundreds of hours of entertainment from all the shows. Yeah, if you'd get five dollars a month, you will get all of the bonus. That's a context. 60 dollars a year. That's easy. You spend more money on I don't know matchbox cars. I tell you what, I tell you we spend more money on just eyeshunk that you then throw away. I tell you what, this month don't buy barely legal. Never buy it again. Instead, put that money towards Maxwell. Yeah, the internet exists.

Come on. Yeah, just type barely legal into your search engine. Okay, do it right now. Go Google.com. Now type in but spell it B-A-R. Strangely. You want bare sex. Strangely. Strangely, you want bare sex. Strangely, also a maximum fun podcast.

Stop. Dan is sick, as you can tell. He means medicine. The only way we can get the money for that medicine, is if you donate at maximumfund.org slash donate. If we don't get Dan penicillin within the hour, you will almost certainly expire. And if you do get me penicillin with the hour,

I will also probably expire, because I'm allergic to penicillin. Oh, is that so? Yeah, please. If you find me on the street and think what as man needs a little penicillin to fix him right up, blow him to the ass. That's my vigilante duke or is him. I wander the subways in the middle of the night and if I see a passed out vagrant, I rub some penicillin under their nose.

Is it a moldy piece of bread and rub it on their feet? Yeah, exactly. Wow, so you can't have penicillin. Yeah, you're even more of a sickly wafel, and I realized. This is a childhood allergy. I don't know what's going to happen to me in adulthood, but it may be a superfile. So let's try it. Yeah, you might emerge from your chrysalis.

Yeah. And you are no longer allergic to insulin. Yeah, the doctors told your mom, never let him have penicillin. Tell him he's allergic. Just one whole whole whole whole whole. Or also turn into a super creature. Yeah, the Harrison birds are out of you. Yeah, exactly.

The whole Western medicine is just holding you back, dude. So for $5, you get the bonus episodes. What do you get if you donate more than $5? Nothing. What? Not nothing? No donate more than $5? Nothing. What? Not nothing? No, quite a bit more than nothing. This is quite an incredible deal.

We'll get into the specific gifts later on, but I will say that the $10 a month level or the $10 a month level. As people would say, yeah. $10 a month. As I wish, I mean, I'll leave you on a set of $10. I'm gonna do it. Yeah.

You probably melt it down for 40 cents. Very sharp bandana of your choice. No, I need a 10. Like sharply it looks cool. It's really good. I think 22 designs, one for all those shows on the network. Yeah. They're all beautiful. They're beautiful bandanas. Bandani.

Bandani. Bandani. That's me. Bandani. That's me. Bandani, that's me band Danny When you were the mascot for band-aid and brand band-aid Oh, I got on me a cut that was band-aid you see I am stuck on band-aid brand Because band-aid you remember when they added that in yeah, just the jingle was always I'm stuck on band-aids Because band-aid stuck on me and then they added added brand

The jingle was always I'm stuck on band-aids because band-aids stuck on me. And then they added Brad. Because people thought it was the generic kind. Yeah, because attorneys hate jingles. I like that much more than the idea that it was a band-danny movement. There were people out there who were just trying to get around. Band-danny, band-danny. Mm-hmm. Well, if you killed fewer people, there wouldn't be that call.

Look, if I killed fewer people, then how would I have any fun? He makes a good point. But what we normally do is not come to you with hat and hand. What we normally do is take your hat off your head, throw it on the ground. Yeah, we steal it. PG would have style as a. Did he steal hats from people?

Well, it's cute. Because I know him more as an author, but I know he's a famous hat. Put out the api in his in his in his attic he had thousands of bowlers. That man is funny computer. There was another robbery of the hat museum. Oh, we're killing Danny. Stop you guys. Don't make him laugh. A lung's gonna come out. I mean, we got out. Don't worry about man. We We got the extra extra cops for the Farrow's hat exhibit

Pretty accents there from your your Scotland yard. Yeah, I don't know where he was from this The day I spent a lot of today trying to figure out what my Jane Campion accent would sound like and it was too australian every time. You know, couldn't get a New Zealand. Why are you working on a Jane Campion? That is a good question. I can't quite answer because there is no real answer. Were you actually working on it or were you just just for fun? Oh, you weren't doing professional reasons. Look, Elliot has no professional reasons at the moment. So what's what's a job? I mean, I'm looking for a champion came to you as a director and said, I want to cast you in my movie, but you have to have a Jane champion. I want you to cast. I want you. I want

you. Yeah, I want you to start in my bio pick that I'm making of myself called GI Jane. Yeah. It's about my struggles with my intestinal problems. It's good to tie in with the movie. We watch the movie. Yeah. Yeah. Now Dan good time with the movie. We watched the movie. Because it started more. Now Dan, what movie do you watch? Demure more. We watched a movie called Nothing But Trouble. Now was the movie. It wasn't.

It warned us. It warned us. I had never seen this movie. And it was definitely ripe to be seen by me in the year of its release 1991. Because it probably came out on video in 1992 or late 1991. And I was working in a video store in New Haven, Connecticut at the time. I remember when it came in, I had seen previews for it on other movies. And I was like, I do not need to watch this movie.

So this video is... But you know, this is... Yes. Your uniform was probably what, like, I do not need to watch this movie. So this video is so nice. But you know, this is, you're probably, your uniform is probably what, like, I pair overalls with one of the straps off, but I'm like, I wore my jeans backwards. I think that's a function tag.

It's in the end. And every morning I would come in, and I would bring in the returns out of the return box, and then I would just warm and I would bring in the returns out of the return box and I would just warm it up Chris. But I mean, this was a time when you absolutely, like I was in my early 20s. I worked at a video store and I worked all day and no one would ever come in and all you would do is like I believed I was immortal and I could waste day and no one would ever come in. And all you would do is like,

I believed I was immortal and I could waste time watching terrible movies. And then you never got around. But this is one of us like, hmm, not this one. Yeah. You know, I don't think. There's trouble in the title. I don't want to watch.

I don't want to see. I don't want to see. It's as trouble as big and happening in a China that's smaller than the normal side. I'm not interested. I have to say that it was a great joy of my life to inflict this movie on Mr. John Hodgman and look over at him at certain points

when I knew what was about to happen. Did it show on my face? The bafflement of disgust on his face. Let me set the stage for you, everybody. So Dan, in his apartment, he has a couch and a rocking chair. And Mr. Hodgman chose the rocking chair and the look on his face during certain scenes, it was like we had come upon like a disapproving man sitting on his porch.

Yeah. Just watching like the young people doing who knows what. Yeah, on the screen literally pushed him back in the rocking chair. But the nicest part about it was there was a TV-tran in front of me with a single piece of fried chicken and a martini. And I'm like, oh, life is perfect right now. And I enjoyed sitting down with my friends, Elliot Dan, and what's his name, too. And non-creative.

Yeah. I had the pleasure. We go on service industry. He's called below the line. I had the pleasure of meeting Stuart in a bar, his natural habitat, late on Monday evening, here in Brooklyn, New York, and I've enjoyed knowing you. I'm glad there's not the first time that we have met

and I doubt it will be the last, so there. But now... Bars, we all frequent them right now. We all know. That's where the alcohol lives. We're at the end. We live just like food fight at night. The lights go out and the alcohol comes to life and has adventures.

And it has fights. It's a brawl. And night at the alcohol museum. So you did not have the opportunity to watch this movie. Ever. He had the opportunity. You just never took it. So I know that speaking, I think Dan has. Like JR, have a look. He had the option to watch this movie. Yeah, I mean that's an in joke about some a someone that Dan and I know telling a story that

Was in a meeting at the daily show so no one will know that was delightful that he described it once is he had the option to watch Prometheus yeah, as if anyone at any time does not have the option Yeah, he got the invitation anyone at any time does not have the option. Yeah, whatever. He got the invitation. Yeah. He found a time, an unmarked envelope slid under his door.

This is very mysterious. What an invitation to go into deep space with Ridley Scott. Show me this. Show me this mansion in Safe Houdelio. And then you'll see from the beginning. Recommended that I'd be stoned out of my mind. Well, I think I have time. I'm not sure.

But this movie is one that. Time is I think I have time. I'm not sure. But this movie is one that I'm. Time is the fourth dimension. Thank you. And the movie is shot in three dimensions. So if you have the time to watch Prometheus, I don't know where I'm going. Warm it up, Chris.

This is a movie that I saw. This is the first time I'm my singing in probably about 20, 25 years. Or not, it could be 25 years, in about 20 years. But when I was, it just first time I'm my singing in probably about 20, 25 years, or not it couldn't be 25 years, in about 20 years, but when I was, it just hasn't been around it long, but it was on HBO all the time. Being a child, I had nothing but time. And what you certainly felt that you, yeah. I would not only that I would not,

that I would live forever and could do it, have unlimited time, but also that it was my job apparently to watch whatever television decided to show me regardless of whether I even liked it. They made it. I have an obligation to complete the circle. If I think it was bad, I must be wrong because adults made this. It was supposedly a comedy thing too. Like the fact that, I mean, these are not, I don't know, I mean mean like Chevy Chase's stock has fallen greatly since the making of movies such as Nothing But Trouble. But at the time, you know, you see a movie with Chevy Chase and John Candy and Dan Acroid

and you're a comedy person growing up, you think it's got the bonus. It has to be something about this movie that I'm missing. Yeah, and if this is a... It had a pedigree. Yeah, and if this is a movie other people don't like, maybe it's because it's too original and like too good in some ways, the way that there are plenty of movies that general audiences, they couldn't handle them, but you watch them and you're like,

this is really good. I can see why this was too much for regular people. Like vampires kiss. Yeah, exactly. This is a weird movie. This is a weird movie. You don't know how it's operating or what it's logic is, but you're enchanted by it.

Yeah, and there's a pleasure to Nicholas Cage's performance but you're like, I can see how other people not understanding that. And you'll be like, this is bad. Can't handle 200% performance. Right. She had handle a man yelling every letter in the health of editors therapists.

But this is a very similar film because it features a very strong performance from Dan Acroid, very committed performance, a very weird aesthetic, a very, can't quite put your finger on what it thinks it's doing, a element to it. And yet you find it uncharming completely. In fact, it is utterly disgusting and repulsive. It really, even as a child, I was like, I don't, this is, I'm gonna make a value judgment here. There are two movies that when I was a kid, I was like, I'm, I think this is not a movie I like, and I didn't know that was possible, and they both have Chevy Chase in them.

What's the other one? There's this and Christmas vacation. Oh, right. Which I remember seeing that in the theaters and like a third of the way through being like, I'm not enjoying this, but I'm in a movie theater watching a movie. Like, is that a thing that, like I thought there's something wrong with me for a moment?

So that was the, like that was one of the moments when you realize that movies can be bad. Yes, yes. This is like your words. See, it was much later for me was, it was toys stirring around. Ah, this is the worst thing. So probably that's a movie where, when I've

actually saw it, I was like, this is not a good movie, but there's interesting things going on here. But yet, but it was Christmas vacation was the one where I went to my family, and they were like, I was like, my parents shrugged it off. They were like, that wasn't so good. And we left and I was like, how can you be so cavalier? What's wrong with you?

What's wrong with you? Didn't you just see what happened? My movie wasn't good. This is against the laws of reality. Call the local news. Go tell to the Marines. You're next. You're next to see a movie that isn't good.

Just running through the parking lots really. Should we say, do you say what the movie is about? No, we do. Yeah, we're gonna do that. Okay, we're just taking a long time, getting around to it. We're way more on point than usually, usually at this point, we're talking about some dumb,

like, we're in a Herzog impression that one of us is doing. Right. So it's pretty good. Hello, my name is Verna Hanson. I'm a good director of movies. Yeah. Is that your Jane Cambian? is Bernadette's on. I'm a good director of movies. Is that your Jane Campion?

I think it's pretty close, right? It's pretty close to the real one, yeah. I mean, each mid-Ian director of a filmin' and boah! Nothing but trouble is a hard movie to get across though, because I've tried to explain to people by saying it is an attempt to make Texas Chainsaw massacre as a comedy. But if you say that, like, if I heard that, I would think,

that's awesome. I want to see that movie. Well, but I immediately struck me that the way this movie was made was Dan Aceroid wandered onto the set of Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 and said, can I do something with this? Because it's the exact same premise and the exact same over the top over set decorated, weird, Chachky Layden haunted house, contraption house deal.

Yeah. As the second Texas Chainsaw Massacre and the second team Texas Chainsaw Massacre is sort of commuting. Terrifying, but it's a comedy. Yeah. You know, like what it strikes me as him seeing like Peewee's big adventure. Yeah, I mean, like I could make a movie like that. Well, right. I mean, not understanding what he was, what went into that movie.

This was his attempt to make a Tim Burton, like a Gothic Tim Burton movie, but he did. So that was unpleasant man babies. I'm pleasant and like an a rollercoaster that strips people's flesh from their bones and then spits them out. The movie begins with early 90s blues or jazz? It's a Ray Charles song. Yeah, it's a song over the Manhattan Nightline. Now this is a comedy from 1991 and as was the law passed by Congress, all comedies were made between 1984 and 1992, had to open with a helicopter shot of the New York skyline

and that some kind of like bluesy jazz song sung by an African American singer. Right. That was just... I remember when they when they passed that law, I was glued to C-Span that afternoon. It was very dramatic. The whole day or the whole day. When Reagan signed it into law. Oh my god, tears. I still... Yeah, you interrupted the normal video watching it.

Which is a sent to the store. I just watched this in the store, and I thought, was this attempt to kick something off a soul like when it was the widest movie in the world? Well, with most movies or just the stuff? Yeah, with most movies. It was a way to make a movie. I mean, this is the original London round.

So it's not, you know. And what's the whole world? It is technically not the widest movie in the world. On a technicality. There's one scene with black people in it. I guess two because there's some black state troopers at the end, but Dan Eckhart also has a history of there there's the good things he does and then there's the more like blues brothersy things he does where he wants to be cool. We're like and he's like, you know what? I like music. I know on the outside I'm like, but inside, who knows what I am?

You know what? A Bruno-type character. Yeah, he is. Yeah, if only he had the faith that Bruce Willis has in putting the character on a CD and then never doing it ever again. I just performed it at Planet Hollywood. There are two things that I know about Dan Acquroyd.

And one is that I do believe he is genuinely interested in rhythm and blues music. Oh, no, it is. And I believe that he genuinely believes that there are UFOs and ghosts. And beyond that, Dan Acroid is unknowable. There is. Like I felt like we really saw into,

this movie was written by Dan Acroid with his brother. It was directed by Dan Acroid. It was a total Dan Acroid with his brother. It was directed by Dan Acroid. It was a total Dan Acroid joint. He recruited a cast of old friends, John Candy and Chevy Chase, and Brian Doyle Murray, and whatever to be in it with them. The look on their faces throughout the movie is, I guess I have to do this. And I feel like we are peering into the adult brain of Dan Acroid.

I don't know what is going on inside. I have not felt this way about really not knowing how another human being thinks. Since the time I saw Dan Acroid do that ad for Crystal Head Vodka. I was sure that, I don't know what reality you are inhabiting. I don't know whether you're being serious or joking. And if you're being serious, I don't know who you are anymore. Is this performance art or do actual humans want to spend roughly 90 minutes in this work? Yeah. There's a there's a commercial. He did he had a wine also that he did commercial for. But he not come in a crystal crystal skull. Well, that is non-drigable. But it was like, but I remember seeing the ad

and he like gives a smile at the ends that I think he's supposed to be like, it's good stuff. I enjoy it too. But this look on his face is like, there's poison in this. Like you know it, when you drink this, you're gonna die. Like this is our little secret and it's gonna die with you. So, but he, okay, so we should talk about

what's in what the movie happens. So, we start off. Can we, I actually want you to try to tell me what the plot of the movie is. Okay, the only part I'm really not clear on, it'll get to, which is, so it's New York City. Chevy Chase is a very rich, like, hot stock tips guy. He has a financial newsletter that he gives out. And he's throwing up like a fucking pamphlet that he hands people I don't know he's making money off of this thing oh no that's real money yeah oh yeah you kidding me financial newsletters like a newsletter

yeah oh yeah he's just spent a lot of money to subscribe to it because it's good tips good tips one of the the headline says like that I need to say why not having all the like artwork and uh color it looks like it was run off in the miniatur And he said, like, I'm not having all the like artwork and color. Right. It looks like it was run off in the miniaturized school office. Yeah, exactly. Is that the shirt funny?

It's the shirt funny. It's the mailman holding up a letter. What's the headline that we see on that? It's like, by Coco. Stay in Coco. Stay in Coco. There are actually a few legit funny lines in this movie, and that was one of them for me. I didn't know what was going on there. but he runs into a new tenant at his building

played by Demi Moore to me more who is at that she is you know she was born half more but she changed to be more sophisticated well a more had made it with a human woman so she was born as a Demi Moore yep of course Hestia sent those snakes to kill her in her crib, but she strangled them with her prodigious strength. All right, I'm leaving now.

Okay. But uh, so she is a lawyer who's involved with some guy who is both her boyfriend and also a client, and he's doing some kind of landfill deal. This is something I did not. I couldn't wrap my mind around. Okay, do we never see a real Rosalind? All you need to know is that she convinces Chevy Chase, I need to go to Atlantic City tomorrow.

Can you drive me in your fancy car? I don't know why she asked him in particular. It's a cherry beamer. And he says yes because he wants to put his penis inside of her. Oh, yeah. Oh, that was the subtext that I missed. Yeah. And the, when Demi wears at a party with him, she's wearing a low cut black cocktail dress. It's frames that you don't see a cleavage. And I was like, Dan Acroid, what kind of director are you? Not, not remembering that throughout the rest of the movie, she's constantly bending over or falling down face first with her boobs hanging up for dress. So you said you corrected me, Dan

Acroix. That's right. Yeah, I would I would like to I would like to come to the baths. I don't want to I don't want to interrupt the synopsis of the film, but I would like to come back to the topic of Demi Moore. Why did you make it? Why? Because I understand my chubby Chase made it. I understand why John Candy made it. I mean, it's possible she was dating Dan Acroid at the time, probably not, but she was also. No, how dare you. How dare you suggest that Dan Acroid is unfaithful to Donatexan?

Sorry, I apologize, yeah. My girlfriend. That. So she's unfaithful to him with you. She doesn't know that she's my girlfriend. But that is a marriage that seems, that is a Canadian weirdo marriage that seems truly solid. They've been together for a long time.

For a long time. I always love you. He has certainly given a reason to stick it in there. I mean, this movie right there, all you have to go to Du Bois Court and the judge says, what's the reason and she plays the movie and the judge is like, I want to divorce you now. So these two rich people, these two wealthy New York

loads some yuppies. Yeah, they're the heroes of the film. They're the heroes and they're and and and unironically portrayed as the heroes. Like they're not villains in any way. We're supposed to really like them. We don't want to see them get a comment. Jimmy Chase is supposed to be that, it's supposed to be able to pull that off though.

He's supposed to be able to pull off like the rich 80s jerk. People have believed that Chevy Chase was capable of pulling off a lot of things for a long time. I mean, that's like his role in Caddy Shack is basically there. Right. But he says funny things in that. And there's like a dearth of funny things. All right, wait, so two.

You reach a lot of signs in the movie. Two wealthy creeps get into a beamer to drive to Atlantic City for reasons unknown joined by. Join for reasons unknown by Taylor Negron and actress like, you know, I was, yeah, as two Brazilian millionaires were Brazilian airs as Chevy J. Scals them in what is kind of a joke.

That was a, a, That was a generational defining joke. We don't remember when they were in the middle of the two. Yeah, that's right up there with all I'll have what she's having. It's like, Brazilian airs, you know, because that's a thing we all know about. And they decide, oh, we're going to go on the drive-to for no reason. They leave New York City. They enter New Jersey and as a New Jersey native myself having spent the first

17 years of my life there It was not a portrait of New Jersey. I really recognized apparently Dan Aquare thinks that in the space between New York City and Atlantic City Which is a very easy drive. I've done it. I've taken the bus that way like Don't don't don't say that You're trying to portray yourself as a successful podcaster. No, no've taken the bus that way, like, that there, don't say that. That there are. You're trying to portray yourself as a successful podcaster. No, no, just taking the bus. I've taken the bus. Yeah, that's stopping just a quake

where you kind of sit around waiting and you're like, I thought it was for now, I said cheese quake. I thought so too and I was corrected. Bye, who? They said there's gonna be a stop and cheese quake. People are gonna get on there and I was like, I was imagining tourist t-shirts that say, I survived the cheese quake.

And the cheese quake is, the the font is like letters made out of cheese That are shaking around like in a reference to a stop on the Jersey turnpike that is clearly labeled cheese quake It is spelled cheese quake You're telling me that it is actually pronounced Chesa quake. That's what I was told Yeah, after spending oh, we have damn what was the joke? I'm something. That's what I was told. Yeah, after spending, oh, we have Dan. What was the joke? I'm something you get the guy for your recipe. Yeah, the old Mary and Grill. It's one of your dessert options. Yeah, you get the red, white and blue cheese quake. Yeah. It's a real mountain of American cheese inside molten, velvety cheese.

And it's profoundly unstable. You have to eat it before it falls apart. There's one scientist saying you guys have to evacuate this machine. I'm like, shut up, that head. Measuring it's 7.9 on the lichter scale. Oh, excuse me. Please leave. I just forgot your name again.

How can I exercise my veto power over that joke Rarely used okay, so in between New York City and Atlantic City If you just take a short detour because your Brazilian friends want to see the countryside You will find yourself in a in a like a like Mad Max style coal destroyed Industrial zone right a waste land like there there are waste land industrial areas in New Jersey, but rarely are they coal mines, and very rarely are they the personal fiftoms of like in bread hillbilly families?

Unless it's a horror movie. Unless it's a horror movie. But again, not that many horror movies are set in New Jersey, maybe in the Pine Barons. But they're not getting this. You're not. You're not. We're in as far as South is as Pine Barons.

There's no, there's no, there are not in Jersey double territory there. No, exactly. There's no Mothman, wait Mothman's New Jersey. That is West Virginia. Yeah. I mean, what you would find between New Jersey. This movie was supposed to be set in West Virginia.

Okay. I mean, like that, it would make more sense if it were in West Virginia or anywhere in the, in the true Appalachians where there is actual coal mining. Yeah. But the, so the, the premise is that if you take a little bit of a detour off of the Jersey Turnpike in this coastal part of New Jersey, you will suddenly be in the foothills of gigantic San Bernardino style mountains because that's what they were in the actual shooting. And it's an entirely strip-mined central Pennsylvania area coal fire hellscape.

Yeah. For many of the locals boasts Chicago in accents. Yeah, right. And if you, and if you miss a stop sign, if you miss a stop sign, John Candy will very politely arrest you, recommend that you be fined, but the crazy old judge played by Dan Acroid will sentence you to staying overnight in a weird puzzle house. Full of full of full of genoust trap, chats, keys and and phallix and

both. I feel like we're skipping a couple important things. One of which is the town they drive through is one of these towns that only exists for creepy old people to or creepy looking people to sit on abandoned couches and watch city folk drive through right and to scowl at them. They go through a stop sign

and John Kenny turns on his sirens and the Brazilians are like, hey, we should run off and just leave him behind. Just speed it up. And Chevy, it was like. Well, because it was already set up, they were in this sweet beamer. Yeah. And Jerry,

Demi Moore basically has an orgasm about Jerry, Chevy Chase's car. And so it's been set up. There's like, this is an incredible car that these rich creeps have. Yeah, the camera just like lingers all over that new fangled GPS unit. Yeah.

I could not believe there was a GPS in that car. Like, you know, that, if I had seen that in the movie theater, I'd be like, what an age we live in. You know, you're rich people can always know where they are. You would leave the movie theater I'd be like what an age we live in. There are rich people can always know where they are. You would leave the movie theater, go to the payphone and call your mom to explain that you're living in the future.

Look out days looking up at the stars. Well, I've seen it. I've seen tomorrow, but it's today. Well, you just stop and buy centers. What year is it? What century is it? You understand? A car had a computer in it. And the GPU, there is a lot of speculation in the room

that this was somehow product placement from the GPS company, whatever it is. But like all of the product placement that might have bit all the products that exist in this film and being put in very bad light. I have to assume these are products that did not meet the asking price for not being

included. Right, exactly. In that room, there's an extortion situation. Here's a deal. If you lose this product, you gotta be ashamed of it, just show it up and nothing will trouble. Well, he's soft drink. Pay me a million dollars when I'm putting it in my movie.

No, no, no, no, no. The GPS company, if you don't give me a million dollars, I'm going to feature you probably in the movie, and then we will lose service in the middle of new jersey and then as a result that people will be murdered as you can clearly see in this scene dannegrot's character has a tiny little train drive around delivering pizza pizza pizza's to the horrified guest in one of the most repulsive... Come on, ride the condiment drain. And ride it.

Well, they're eating dinner, Chevy Chase hallucinates, the Dan Ackroyd's, phallic nose is actually, I guess, just a penis. Just a penis. But we haven't even gotten there. So I guess I'll speed up to that point. They don't move me. That's basically a walking hallucination. They don't, yeah, they go on a chase.

John Candy reaches them because he has afterburners on his car and stops them with some, he has some push button tricks on his dashboard that cause signs to pop up in the middle of the road and stand them on a D-torque. They're really granular with this. Yeah, they were speeding it up. Because it's important. I think it feels like it sets up two important things.

One, there's like a three-error on five different. John Katie is the only likable person in the movie. Yeah. In his first character. And two, that there's a lot of push-button gimmickery and G. Wiz Gadgets. Right. They go.

So you're real tomorrow, land. Yeah, exactly. They're detoured into this town that where the main business seems to be collecting junk and just stroing it about the roads. And Chevy Chase proceeds to read every sign on the road out loud because he is Andy the old man from Forget Paris. So it's just like, uh, Applebees.

And Applebees. Look at that. Giffy Loub. Interesting. The amount of sign reading barns and double a lot in this movie where if something I never noticed as a kid but which was pointed out and was very clear while watching is that there was a lot of voices dubbed in after the fact to add jokes or things or to feel silences right so there's a lot of like you'll see a shot of something you hear

chavish asco like that doesn't look good you know like really folks around here. Let's walk down this hallway, then turn left. The wall's coming towards us. It's moving too fast. Here's a door, but it's locked. The early 90s version of Pat and Oswald, you've paid a lot of money to punch that stuff up.

Well, but there are these moments of, I actually think that if you took out all those ADR ad lib lines, it might be a harrowing horror film. Yeah. But instead, they're like, there's just a lot of sounds in here. Let's get Chevy in here to just punch it up a little bit with a couple of ad lib and Chevy Chase probably came in and said, oh boy.

And I'm like, yeah, yeah, Chevy, that was great. Maybe just take another run at that. Maybe another joke. Nope, that's fine. You're forgetting that I'm still a superstar. Right. Cheving, maybe take off your sunglasses. It's a projection room. I don't know that you can see the screen. Boy, she's real ugly. I think we got it, guys. No, Cheving.

Could you act like you're in the scene? No. You're just stating things that are true. Could you state an A to C? I don't think there was an instance of printed matter in the film, that Chevy Chase did not read out loud. He was a benefit presumably of illiterate audience members. Not a single headline of a newspaper, not a single street signs, like, hmm, turn left.

Or he was doing it radio drama style later on, or he was like, oh, that almost hit us. Right, yeah. Thanks. I wonder. I mean, yeah, did you think visual media? This was gonna double as like the tape version that kids could buy. Did you see the audio tape for Long Car? We're running down the hallway.

We turn the page. You're listening to Nothing But Trouble. You have reached the end of cassette A. I just put in cassette B of Nothing But Trouble. Here's me, Bozo the Clown. Let me tell you a story about my friends, Chiffey and Daly. They had nothing but trouble. When you hear the beep, turn the page. So they're...

I wonder how much Nothing But Trouble merchandise was made. Know them but trouble. When you hear the beep, turn the page. But so they're... I wonder how much nothing but trouble merchandise was made. I have to say in the movie I Googled nothing but trouble merchandise and I just found a bunch of red bubble accounts of people's like Vulcanvania t-shirts they made. Really? Later bootleg stuff. Later bootleg stuff.

Are you suggesting that there's a small community of trouble heads nothing but he's gonna say that trouble heads they consider to be a little bit of a slur but they're brought before this just as of the piece played by Nanakroid who is an aged fellow and the most grotesque character until later in the movie when we meet the really most grotesque characters. And he takes sheer pleasure in killing anybody who the he considers a criminal, especially bankers. Because a long time ago, bankers came and swindled them out of the title to this land and

they drilled underneath it and mined everything and now it's hollow and full of fire. And they're forced to live there, I guess, and just be in the middle of hell. And so he sentences that. He presides over a disgusting clan of mutants. But not in the front fund, the hills have eyesway. They're cooking and eating a baby. In the not-fung. In the horrifying, nothing but trouble with.

And Shady Chase just cannot help but being a cynical jerk. Even when it gets on the wrong side of this dude, and he says, I will not murder you, you will stay overnight and have supper with us. There's, yeah, just to keep this dumb movie going. And it's important right after they drop him in a ball pit. It's full of something that is squeaky and they must have added so many squeaks after the fact. Every move or just moment, there's, you hear like, and I think as a kid I thought it was full of rats because the squeaky this but nobody reacts as if it is.

They go through a trap door into a ball pit, then I would fall into a pit full of rats long before I would spend 10 minutes. It didn't grow. Here's to the, I don't want to spoil this for anybody. Our judgment. If you go into, if you go into this character's court, the character is about 15 different names.

He was credited as JP for Justice of the Peace, also known as Alvin, also known as the Reeve. And, they called it Judge, right? And he's basically just, it doesn't underestimate the audience. Like, it trusts you to follow that stuff. That's right. That's right. That is the king of

Velconvania. They, they smell a lot of time building that world. There was some, some weird description of law, like everything else in this movie, long and unnecessary description of the political structure of this particular shy, but it's still, that it, that it adhered to pre-colonial laws of some kind. We magna carto law to establish, is what they go by. Right. And so he has the power to kill anyone he wants. And it's, yeah, there's every, everything in this movie takes longer than it should. And so I wouldn't be surprised if Dan Acquired has like a 100 page packet of the history of these

characters in this play. Oh, I think you're absolutely right. I mean, you know, the world that he built for Ghostbusters is a 10,000 pages long in his own head. Yeah. I mean, we know this from him. I've been trying to find if any listener has one of these, I'm trying to find an original script for Ghostbusters when it was when it was about him and John Belushi traveling through time and alternate dimensions. There was a version of New York that was a hell version of New York. The idea was that there were different teams of Ghostbusters that traveled through space and time fighting demon ghosts from other dimensions. I want to read the script so badly because it's like, I don't know how that turned into Ghostbusters,

one of the most stripped down, clearest concepts, which is that like three buddies fight ghosts. Like, it's like, it's like, no, like they're exterminators basically. Yeah, they're exterminators but for ghosts. This is how, this is how it happened. Someone said, Hey, Dan, you're amazing. Thank you for this. This is great. You're brilliant.

And, but we're're gonna do this instead. And Dan I was like, all right, sounds good to me. How many different characters with weird prosthetics on their face do I get to play? Well, right. But I mean, this is the movie where no one said to Dan Aceroid. Yeah. No. They just said, yes. And this is what this full the pure distillation of the spirit of aceroid and a crystal head skull bottle and he so there his captives he feeds them a dinner of big hot dogs They introduce him to his granddaughter also played by John and we also see another group of Naird Wells Feature release one Baldwin possibly three. I don't know

It's two couples who are drinking, doing drugs, driving too fast. Like every crime a person could commit a car. They're doing that. And they get pulled over and they're sentenced immediately to be put on a conveyor belt into a roller coaster that's called the, what the Bones Tripp. Mr. Bones Tripp.

Mr. Bones Tripp, aren't they? Mr. Bones Tripp, Elizabeth Lyson Flarta. Call me, that's called the, what the bone strip. Mr. Bone Stripper. Mr. Bone Stripper. I'm sorry. Mr. Bone Stripper lives in Florida. Call me Ted. Ted Bone Stripper. And so, and the bone stripper is just revolving gears and knives that literally strip the flesh from your bones and then spit the bones out of the target. There are so many piles of human bones in this movie,

which is Dan put it at, are almost all femurs. Sculler, or a ribcage. He's been killing a lot of people with 10 legs. It's like in certain versions of the video game Mortal Kombat, where you perform a fatality and it's all fucking chicken bones flying in the air after you punch somebody. You're like, that guy was four ribcages I guess. The Vulcanvania has a very high crime rate among centaurs because there's this extra leg bones everywhere. I were like spider men. I really like picturing you steward as a young man playing Mortal Kombat.

Well, this is anatomically incorrect. This is not possible. I'll stop masturbating now, I guess. You made me a promise. No one go near this machine. If you must perform a babality and not a fatac. Right, so they kill off. There was a pogrom amongst the centaur as a ball companion. And yeah, and this judge is to blame. And so they,

so they now that's the stakes have been established. Right. If they, if they are on this judge's bad side, they will be killed. The bones will literally be stripped. Yeah, and they don't get those bones back. The judge gets to keep them. They only get to get buried. We keep some in his walls. Along with his slides.

The series of slides and crevices. And secret passages. It's like the way a kid understands an old house to be, which is like, that's a big house. It must be full of traps and slides. As opposed to, this is an old house. The structure really can't support all this extra stuff. Like the walls are not gonna be full of slides

and machinery and stuff like that. But at this point, they're served a disgusting dinner. There's a train that goes around with condom and sun it while a song plays. This happens twice. The Wabosh Cannonball. Was this song? Oh, I didn't recognize it.

It's the centerpiece of the movie. Like this is where the centerpiece of the dinner table. Right. There's so many unnecessary gadgets and every room is full. It looks like they went to somebody on the show hoarders and they were like, can we just shoot this movie in your house and can we add some stuff? Can we add some stuff? We have as long as you pay me in cat skeletons Well, we can't but we have some femurs Those are more busted typewriters over there and some more old whatever. I don't know pick up go to the dump Pick up like three tons of shit and just like drop it around the house I would like to see I'm going to look up with a set decorate

I mean the second set-breaker did did, I didn't know. No, he did a fantastic job. The order of Risen's work. The quality of the job was not amazing, but the quantity of the job was astounding. But if you, if the set decorator decorations were pretty amazing. If you find it inherently funny to have phallic sausages served to people at a dinner, oh boy.

If you want to watch it. Oh, brother. Let me ask you this question. I love that joke so much that I'd like to see it seven or eight times. Does this movie have anything for me? And everybody. Oh, sister. So John Candy and Drag is serving up sausages out of a steamer tray.

Every time she presented to someone they react as if they've never seen a sausage before. And they're horrified with a very idea of something long and tube shape. Every time she presented someone they react as if they've never seen a sausage before Horrified with a very idea of something long and tube shape I'm just made of like a delicious thing that everybody likes to eat if I do Demi Demi more takes about three minutes to man handle a ants on the log on to her plate As if she doesn't realize she could use her left hand to pick this Can he goes ants on the log and Demi Moore reacts as if it was the eyeball soup from Temple of Doom. Like she says,

the monkey brains, I don't know how to handle this. But so after they, now this is really. It is kind of a funny joke though. Like if I went to a formal dinner party and someone offered me antonolog. I would probably call it a formal dinner party.

Look, they're, it's not black tie. There's no place for it. I think that you're right. They did not dress for dinner. It's just dinner. Yeah. But Anson-alog is, I guess, is a funny thing for them to serve them.

Well, yeah. I mean, if it had just been like Anson-alog, then that's the joke. Done. But instead, she's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. How do I pick this up? How does any human handle this? I've never understood this. Do I need tongs?

So to make a long story short, they run around this mansion forever. Taylor Negron and his sister wife, I guess it's a sister, they escape helped by John Candy. And Demi Moore and Chevy Chase find themselves in an attic full of drivers licenses from previous victims. Yeah, when they smoked the eighth cigar that Chivicage apparently has on it. Chivicage is constantly pulling cigars out of his pocket and smoking them and it's like how many? He has a human-door jacket.

Yeah. Like, sure, I'll do this movie before he was a favor. You have to pay me in cigars. Yeah, underneath my suit, Jack, I'm just wearing a Chubaka banal. You're a good cigar. So it doesn't be ready for me to pull them out. He and Demi more hit it off because I guess the fear of death.

The script said that it had to happen. It's the real emotion. Yeah, how large this conspiracy goes. Yeah, but also like if I have never seen I think in any movie, two larger blanks than these two main characters. I mean, they're rich, yeah, please. Which means we like them because they made it. Yeah, exactly, they're successful. Well, like I was saying while we're watching it, this took place during the first of what I'm going to call

the Trump Crests, when Donald Trump went from being like a vulgar, horrible thing to like someone that people admired and wanted to be like. And then he fell back down again, and now he's back on the top of the second Trump crest. But like, at the time, I was like, are you rich and like white and like attractive? You must be the best person in the world.

Yeah, you're the hero of the movie now. Yeah, like you're the hero. You're the hero. Yeah, good. Yeah, it's the time. If you have a nice car, oh great, I love you. It's you clearly to find motives. No who cares? It's similar to how in Teen Wolf his best friend Booth is Objectively more attractive than the girl he's going after but she's blonde and Booth is runette so scientifically

The blonde is more the blonde is more desirable Never get over Booth Never gonna. I like our line. Yeah, well This guy the name Booth. I like our lot. Yeah, right. Well, this guy named Booth, which is inherently adorable. That's an air of mystery to her. How did she get that name and what's her real name? The there is a neckman. There is here. There is absolutely. I actually felt that Chevy Chase was like the movie opens in a realistic setting. Yeah. Like where you feel like, oh, this is going to be some sort of screwball, you know, modern screwball comedy about Wall Street and Chevy Chase has got a certain amount

of charm to him. He's got a little bit of Rogish charm and he's kind of underplaying everything. I'm like, I'm gonna see this movie and then it takes his hard left turn into phony Tim Burton territory. And you never know why she's going along and they have zero chemistry with each other.

And then all of a sudden, they are sentenced by the judge to spend the night together in a room. And then she... Which is like a sitcom judge sentence. Or like, yeah, right into county mover like, this couple's divorcing, well, I sentenced you to spend one night in the cabin alone together to see if there really is no spark left.

And guess what? Do that judge. There's no spark in there. Never was a spark. They have zero. They're absolutely nothing about their characters or their performances suggest that they should be together. Chevy Chase, of course, makes the moves on Demi Moore and every. Well, I mean, he kind of gives us a guard. Yeah, he gives us a guard, right? I mean, in a movie full of phallic symbols, that was the most subtle one he could do. And he kind of like makes a couple of sort of obligatory moves on her. And then she just goes, I have to kiss you on your face a lot.

Yeah. And I love you. And I fall for the wrong man all the time. But now I have to go to sleep. And then she goes away. And it was, it was such a strange moment, right? It felt like a dream sequence and since it came shortly after a moment where we all assume Chevy Chase dreams that Dan Ackroyd's character knows as an actual penis. Oh, right. This is handled so poorly. It's like, it's like, it's like,

moments away from spurting Seaman all over the hot dog. Dan Ackroyd is shoving his mouth. Dan Ackroyd's talking to him. It cuts the Chevy Chase. It cuts back and Dan Acroid is wearing a much more penis-like prosthetic. And it started out pretty penis-like. Yeah. And then it cuts back to Chevy Chase and he's like, huh?

And then it cuts back to Dan Acroid looking the way he did before in the slightly less penis nose. But there's no filter on the image to make sure you know it's a dream. It's just like, it's almost like they did a take with the wrong prosthetic on. And then Dan Acre saw his reflection in a mirror and was like, oh, we said no to this one

because it looked too much like a penis. Give me the other one. I can only guarantee, no, here's what I, that's good. I'm just saying that I'm assuming there's an entire cut of the movie where he shot with the more penis. Yeah, no, exactly. Like that's where I feel like they finally said to Dan Acker,

we can't, you can't wear that. You can't wear that in the movie. And he's like, let me have it for one scene. The first movie that got an NC17 or explicit nose. He said, trust me, it's gonna, it's people are gonna love it. You said the same thing about you getting a blowjob from a ghost. And it's not unseen. Nobody likes in that movie, Dan.

That's true. I just rewatched those besties with my children. And I'm like, come on. And that was part of a whole other sequence that got cut. Yeah, go on. Well, go on. It's the museum of natural history or something like that. Something like that or the Met or I don't know.

But like, how do you explain that to your child to your children by the way? Yeah, I don't Why did his eyes cross just just stare straight ahead and don't make eye contact Get through it and see if any questions bubble up and it's like no, I could look you'll get blow jobs from a ghost when you're ready for it Yeah, well you'll understand later from a ghost when you're ready for it. Yeah, well, you'll understand later when a ghost blows you. When a creep and a ghost love each other very much. Now, I like to imagine that your children turned you in. They're like, Dad, is there anything you want us to explain about which is happening

there? Yeah, right. Because I know you're from an or more innocent time. That's true. That's true. When there were an ectoplasmic blow jobs all over the place on Snapchat or whatever. So they managed to escape because John Candy pulls a lever that opens a door for them. And yeah, he takes pity on them.

He does. He's the nicest guy. He's just trying to do his job as a policeman. Now, they're on the run. Chevy Chase manages to watch as Dan Acroid gets ready for bed and pulls his own nose off. And then the wait him in. Wait a minute. Wait a minute, wait a minute. You've jumped ahead.

Wait. First of all, before he sees the nose coming off, they leave their bedroom. Then a trick wall starts to crush them. Chevy Chase narrates exactly what the wall is doing at every moment. And I would say, it's five feet away. Now it's three feet away.

Now it's two feet away. Let's go up these stairs. Oh, it's a blind staircase. They go up into the attic. It's rigged these stairs. Oh, it's a blind staircase. They go up into the attic. It's rigged. There's a booby trap in the attic that they almost get crushed by a safe. Because Wiley Kiyokai-Oni, Wiley Kiyokai-Oni designed this house.

Exactly. Because the attic is the repository of all of the driver's licenses and passports that have been confiscated by the Danackrade character in his four fathers over hundreds of years. Yeah, it's the rare evidence attic. The evidence at the top and the Dungeon. Right, exactly. But they end up going down slides there.

Then they go down slides, but the slides take a, make a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, uh, sporkin' path. Yeah, Chevy Chase watches Dan Acquired get ready for bed. And Demi Moore ends up- Through his porkeys hole. Yeah. Okay. And Demi Moore ends up in, and Dan Acquired catches them in whatever. And Demi Moore ends up in the junkyard

where we finally meet the least, the most grotesque I guess. The most unpleasant thing, really. Which are two enormous, let's just say again, this is a movie in which Dan Acquired has a penis on his nose. It's unmistakably a penis. It's like Dan Acquire was like, I'm worried there are people who are still going to be

like enjoying this movie. There might still be people in the theater by this point. Like, yeah. Not going to get them out. Because this is my favorite, the user's stuff. I'll scare him, yeah. Because I'm trying to make the least successful movie in history. How do we drive out that extra person who fell asleep during the beginning of the film

and is still in there? I have about two enormous, mentally deficient man babies who are wearing huge latex fat suits that jiggle a lot and are constantly red. Yeah, they've got double man boobs. Like double man boobs. And huge dirty diapers. And giant gut. And they're all really oily and talk in like a

da da type way and it's implied have become sexually attracted to Demi Moore or maybe want to eat her like it's you know they keep her in a cage and play cards with her and it's like at that point I feel like where the movie has gone from semi-realistic to bizarre. And then from bizarre to nightmare. That's the point that Dan Acquired put into the movie. He's like, this is going to be really great for people who have a really high fever when they're watching this at home.

Because they'll be trying to explain it to people later on. And other people will be like, no, that didn't happen. It's like, sure, that's not the bad baby. It's sure, I saw it. No, no, I didn't, sorry.'re the son of a baby. It's showering a saw it. No, no, I didn't, Sarge. I promised I did. Take him away, boy. These two, why did I try to explain this to an Irish police officer? Take him away, nothing to see here.

Certainly no man, baby. These two characters are so shockingly repulsive on every level. Everything about them. I kind of was speechless for a moment. And there was a moment I was wondering, repulsive on every level. Everything about them. I kind of was speechless for a moment, and there was some other ones wondering, like, maybe I have this all wrong, maybe this is art. I don't, I don't leave the room at this point.

I can't help during scenes like this movie, because I can't help imagining, like, what was it like to be on set while they're shooting this? Like, was anyone there under the impression that, impression that this is funny stuff that we're making? Just imagine the technical crew, who they don't give a shit about the content of the movie they're working on, a job's a job, and they have to watch these two overpaid actors, one of whom is also the director, and is giving them direction while wearing this giant, oiled up man, baby costume, and have to watch him jiggle around and like do a dumb guy.

Oh god god. How did he work for this man? Hold this thing, I'm trying to kill someone. I have to send those to the last scenes shot because nobody would work with Dan Acroix after that. What I would love is it's one of the last days and the makeup artist is like, look, I brought my son, he's a huge Ghostbusters fan.

He's always wanted to meet Dan Acroix let me bring him on to set today oh no he has to meet him this day and it's like that that what is it the long john's like the kid the kid his hair goes white and he's blind and he's just like he's enjoying it his eyes have been torn out it's longer than you think but uh have been torn out. It's longer than you think. But uh, but uh, she, they, uh, you know, luckily, uh, Dan Acroix, then they reunite in an escape. I mean, who cares? Is there a point? No, we skip both that one Chevy Chase is almost forced to marry Dan Acroix, brand-daughter, play the John Candy. He does, he does marry her to get out of being killed and then explain, explainately digital on the show.

Oh, right. You guys were talking about his song. The songs are song. Dennecroyd boogies with them by playing the organ and then allows them to go but just they'll be the band. Just for the digital underground people in the audience, the song they performed was all the same song. I think it's from Sex Packets and it features both Shokji and Humpty. So that's not... As well as backing vocals by Tupak Shakur. So it's not a song that they wrote for the movie.

That was already a different song. And maybe it wasn't on Sex Packets, maybe it was in their follow-up record, because that would be around the time of their follow-up. I remember the video, though. And this is probably them trying to launch their next album. Yeah, the video had a bunch of stuff from the movie, because I hadn't seen the movie when I saw the video and I was like This looks great as a child for some reason

Like clips of this movie were just enough to like give me a little bit of a taste a little bit of an appetizer So what you could be mine was to terminator two one of the better synthesis of song to video that's mainly scenes from movie This was to all the same song. Kinda. I mean, I don't remember if feature is a scene at the end where like that wasn't featured in the actual movie where characters interact like at the end of the could be mind video where the Terminator determines that guns and roses are in fact a ways to make a decision.

Yeah, or we're pretty prudent in that dock and video. Yeah, where he's like, who are those guys? They're super terrifying. When you saw the video of the song did it include the Dan Acroid and Old Man prosthetics jamming out on the pipe organ? I'm sure it did. I don't know what was wrong with me as a child. I think my parents let me watch TV in the basement and it just worked my mind. Well, you lived in a house that was full of slides and traps and trap doors. Because he's sending people through the bony eating roller. Mr. Bones Stripper. Yep. Mr. Bones Stripper. My parents told me our family history with like a burned out half TV set. They Mr. Bones.

Because he lived in the white. The universe. Tipper. This is weird match up with modern and ancient times. Like I like this soft melodic version of the Mr. Bones tripper thief. This is the Mr. Bones jangles. Bones jangles.

Now, but it is worth Mr. Bones trip. A strip some bones for me. You know, No, but it is worth it. Mr. Bone strippers, strips and bones for me. This is, it is worth mentioning that the digital underground thing is easily the best thing in the movie because it is just a musical break. You can forget that the movie is not happening. You can forget that it's happening. Digital underground is doing what they do best. You can make music.

There's women in Skidby Clothes Dancing around. It's suddenly like we're watching the box, the old music video channel where you would call in and pay $3 to get them to play a video. And the video Pop Your Coochie was constantly playing. But it's shocked. I was wearing his nose and we're all, and I was right with the world. Look you guys, as I mentioned, I am Brooklyn, Massachusetts biggest digital underground fan. And I love that band.

And I love, I think Shock G is a genius. I think Humpty Hump is an incredible invention. And I think their songs are terrific. And that guy, I Shock G, if you're out there, call me because I want to know what's going on with you because that guy had tons of charisma in that movie He should have been a movie star. He was he was too pop too pop was Also like commanded the screen the few seconds he was on it. It's amazing how much gent like genuine magnetism They have in this one scene. Yeah, and there's a part where they're leaving and Chevy Chase is like no no no

And he goes hey, I was I was nervous on my wedding day, too And as he's walking out, and it is the funniest joke in the whole group. Yeah, and the most genuine ad lib. It's created a character. You're like, I want to know more about that. I want to know. I want to follow.

Can we go with these? You're like, these men? Can we go with them now? Yeah. It's got a backstory all of a sudden. It's one of the few movies where they left and followed a bunch of, as of assume basically featured players And just follow them on their adventure like I guess like pulp fiction style

Right, I'd be like this was yeah, that was the right creative choice to know it's a crazy thing that just happened But now I'm glad we're the digital underground two pop so Chevy Chase said I looked it up That he hated the script But he had to make it because Dan Eckerd was his friend and it was the worst movie he had ever been in. In the next year, he would make memoirs of an invisible man, and then the year after that, he made cops and robbersons. The year after this movie, Tupac Shakur was in juice. Oh, okay. And was suddenly a true movie star.

So you said, hey, they peed in a fountain together. Yeah, they held a magic skull, that was on set. Something happened. So you think J.A.P. Chase was meant to be murdered in a drive-by, whereas two bucks a core, it's just beyond the community. Well, you know what? I think all of America is agreeing with you right now. And we all know how the West Coast rappers hated Chevy Chase. I mean, it's a huge feud.

Look at history. It was a subset of the Everybody vs. Chevy Chase feud. Planet Earth vs. Chevy Chase battle. I can only imagine Chevy Chase and Dr. Drey the California Love video. Tulin' around in a post-apocalyptic wastelive. I'm gonna do the butt. Right. Just rescuing those bays from that warlord.

So Chevy Chase is humming, call me out. Yeah. Yeah. So in the end, the escape, there's a wonderful moment where they're escaping in what remains of Chevy Chase's car. And Demi Moore says, there's no seat belts and he goes, there's no roof. And their mouths are not moving.

Well, they're like, it's going up to their center. At that point, they're like, fuck it. I know they're on camera. We'll just dove it in anyway. And they escape, they go to the police. The police come with them to the judges house. It was a huge convoy of troopers and everything.

Because this man has been murdering people for decades. Turns out, they're all the judges' friends. They love him. They like that he's taken out the trash. convoy of troopers and everything because this man has been murdering people for decades turns out They're all the judges friends. They love him. They like that. He's taken out the trash and they're about to It's a classic horror movie reversal. Yeah, that it turns out the world is insane turns out Dr. Saperstein's in on it. Yeah, that's you know what I'm talking about So it's a Rosemary's baby We call that a malign paradigm shift I think so. It's a Rosemary's Baby reference.

Oh, okay, this I think. We call that a malign paradigm shift. When you realize that all the other patrons of the medieval bar that you're in are actually werewolves. Everything you thought about reality is wrong. Yeah, it's a real society take. Yep, exactly. So then-

Luckily the movie doesn't linger on that moment long at all. No, the one move on one of the laughs. A genuine unsettling this. Sorry. Uh oh, the earthquake that's been hinted at throughout the movie because the ground is so unstable. Well, there's been a coal fire for 26 years, which is based on Centrelia, Pennsylvania, where there has been a coal fire that's been burning for now,

probably four decades. The only Pennsylvania was within driving distance of New York. And they could have said the movie there. But fortunately, it's on the other side of the country. Right. They, I guess because Chevy Chase blew up a bunch of barrels trying to escape from the like full body guillotine that the man baby were about to subject Demi Moore through.

Against their will, they loved her. Yeah, that hit a fault line, I guess, or something. Which also, they're one. I didn't make that connection line, I guess, or something, which also they're one. I didn't make that connection. That's my guess. I don't know, because it's not very clear. Yeah, well, I mean, at that point, I had stopped worrying about whether anything was causing anything else

to happen in the movie at all, if it was just happening. I mean, the movie posits a world where there is no logic or causality. Right, well, the goal is... Yeah, I'm caring God. Yeah, not only uncaring, hates command, and wants man to suffer and has brought much like the judge in Blood and Ritian we have the judge in nothing but trouble who is just an agent of evil who perhaps is as old as the

Universe and will outlive man and exists only to take joy in the Seduction and then destruction of others, but so that hits they they escape again, and they're back in New York, and they find out on the TV news that the judges survived, and he's gonna come get them. Chevy Chase literally jumps up, and you see a Chevy Chase shaped hole in the wall as if he ran through it like bugs money.

Marigold Brown broke down plays on this soundtrack. I mean, if this was Gremlin's new, I'd be like, yes, definitely. And that was the moment, so Chevy Chases in New York, and he's watching the coverage of which I looked over at Hodgman to see how do you react to this?

Well, because that was the return of the penis nose at that moment, too. I mean, oh, yeah. That was, it was not just that, so Chevy Chases in New York watching television coverage of the Mind Fire and they find an old vagrant and it turns out to be Dan Acroid and he turns to the camera and he's got that penis nose on.

He's like, I'm coming for you. And then Chevy goes, feet, don't fail me now. Pfft! The end. And it was like, thank you. And the credits roll and somewhere in the dusty corner of a planted Hollywood The facial prosthetic of Dan Planet Hollywood in like Bangkok that's been demolished

Because it's like they couldn't sustain itself and all the props are taken out except that one and the camera Pushes through the rubble and pushes past like there's a there's a group of street people who are coming down with strange diseases and it pushes in on that prosthetic and it just lows briefly and then cuts to credits. It's evil is still inside it waiting for a new host. Now I'm going to say something that may be controversial at this table. Wow, okay. Okay. I'll be stealing myself. I felt that Dan Ackeroid's performance was fantastic. I think I'll give you that he is playing that character as much as that character can be played.

Yes. It just gives himself no funny things to do. Well, he shouldn't be funny. He should be creepy. This was Dan Ackeroid's attempt to make either a horror movie or like a horror comedy, either like a gothic horror comedy, like a Tim Burton, or as we were saying, like a freak out horror comedy, like Texas Chainsaw, and the problem was he couldn't make a Tim Burton movie because he doesn't have good taste or discretion or restraint of any kind.

And he doesn't know how to direct a movie. Tim Burton, a director known for his restraint. Well, right. But I mean, like, when you think about this movie in contrast to like Beetlejuice, which had a lot of upper class sort of the straits in the movie where these upper class rich people. And they were the grotesques. And the monsters were the sort of freewheeling agents of chaos that you kind of liked even when Beetlejuice was terrifying, right?

So in this movie, they had the other way around. They made the monsters, they made the grotesque characters, the villains, and the rich people, the heroes, when it should have been the other way around. Well, when you're talking about like country versus city, the country is only good in a horror movie. Like the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the country are the like the, the, the, the oppressors in a horror movie because it's like the backwards maniacs.

In a comedy, country always beat city. Like cities always the bad guys. Right, and crack it out, Dundee's, if that's a comedy, is that a comedy? But cities, that's jokes, it's like, you know, like even if country in a horror movie is an agent of murder, right? And terror and horror,

it's always because the city kids deserve it. Yeah, that's great. Because they're shallow or they kiss each other or something, you know, or they, they, they cross some taboo. I mean, Texas, James and Massacre, I think it's just that they're super irritating. Uh, uh, uh, T-C-M-1 or T-C-M-2. Uh, T-C-M-1, especially wheelchair kid. Wheelchair kid.

I think it's so brave about that movie. Is it made wheelchair kid the worst? I think it was Joe Bob Briggs who was saying that like, never has an audience wanted a handicap character to be murdered. More than in that movie. Well, that's why that movie is art. Yeah.

And that's why this movie is not. But just like, so Texas Jansom S. I remember the first time I saw that, there's the scene where they wake up grandpa. And he's going to, they want him to use a hammer to bash that one's head in. Oh my god, it's the scene where they wake up grandpa and he's going to they want him to use a hammer to bash that Oh god, it's almost like he can't quite lift it up and they're like come on grandpa Come on grandpa and it's so frightening to serve in but it's kind of funny that yeah, but and it was like That that moment is what every moment of nothing but trouble wants to be right, but it can't pull it off

It's not successful right moment of nothing but trouble wants to be, but it can't pull it off. It's not successful. Right. Yeah. Instead, the movie becomes scarier for that. Like, it's not as scary as Texas Chainsaw Master. So it's scarier to me that somebody wanted to make this movie. Like, this madman is on the loose selling vodka. Yeah. This is like in real life, there's a monster out there. There's a Canadian monster who's completely unpredictable and we don't know what's motivating him. He's making us do things against our will. Like he held that cast against their will and not just the cast, but the crew as well.

And there are cast who, I mean, John Candy also delivers a great performance. Like he commits to what he had to have known. It wasn't good. Right. But that's because he could tap into his character who I think is supposed to be the grandson of Dan Acroid, who's been the sheriff in town all this time. And it kind of takes pity on these people

and kind of just wants to get them out of there. And that's because he was able to tap into his own feelings about the movie. Like, let me just be straight with you. You don't want to be here. Let me, when he's saying to, he says to TVT's character like, look, I'm going to ignore the fact that you were speeding. You went through a stop sign. Let me just take you to the judge. I'll recommend you have a fine. Then you can go and Chevy Chase talks himself into a death

sense. But it's like John Candy saying the audience just, let's just end the movie now. Yeah, let's just, let's just figure it out. Right, go. You probably gotta help a wife. I forget, I forgive you for buying the tickets. I know you paid five dollars to see this, and then another four for popcorn. Right.

Take the popcorn home, finish it there. Cut your losses, cut your losses and get out. Look, it's 1991, it's Friday, watch TGIF. There's a new perfect strangers, maybe full house. Put that popcorn in the fridge, it'll be good tomorrow right you know what sometimes I like your popcorn right in the fridge yeah keeps a crisp in there but in the crisper that's what's for yeah but it's corn crisper drawer what is the science behind the crisper well there's what what we call crisp elves with your tiny elves that make things crisper by adding

little bits of cement are they are they cris Chris Bells or Chris Pimps? Uh, that's a question that science is really degrading for a long time. Well, I mean, Chris Pimp Glover is one of the main things. That's what I'm saying is, if someone else had produced and directed this movie and just said, but here's here's what happens. The creeps from the city are creeps, and they need to be punished,

and your character has to be actually not funny, but terrifying, Dan Accurates performance, even if he just re-edited that movie. I bet you it would be totally watchable and weird performance. Because I don't necessarily... I mean, I thought he acted the heck out of that. I don't mind that any of our heroes

are being put through the ringer. They're not likeable at all. I don't mind that they have to suffer a little. Right. I want to get Rob Zombie to go back and re-head of that movie. I'm sorry. Rob Zombie's nothing to control.

Rob. Such a crazy origin story. If it turned out this was his favorite movie, it's going to be like, oh, everything makes sense about you now, Rob Zombie. It's very, one of the, has a 10,000 corpses. Yeah. What's the one about the Devils? The Devils Rejects.

Devils Rejects. Did you like those movies? I've never seen all of them all the way through. Like I've only seen pieces. They're ridiculous, but kind of great. And I haven't seen it. Yeah, I like those movies. I like the Devils Rejects up until the final scenes,

spoiler alert, where they feature a lot of people. Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na that a town because I know there's certain movies I can't even watch when I know she might walk through the room because I don't want to expose her to like the images that she's gonna see if I'm watching it on the iPad while I'm doing the dishes which is when I watch most of my movies these days I know there's a chance she might walk over to get a glass of water and see something that's what you're watching there what's that all that one of those those devil rejects it's just somebody's grandpa trying to hit someone with a hammer is that Bill Mosley? I love that angle. Are you watching a Sid Hague movie?

What's that? I got to the out of it. That's when you turn into an Irish cop. Move along. No, not in a city. Move a tattoo. So should we go to Final Judgement? Yeah, we should go to Final Judgement.

I liked it. Movie I kind of liked. Yeah. This is a good bad movie, a bad, bad movie, or a movie you kind of liked. I'm going to start off and say that this may no longer be my least favorite movie all time. I will say that because we've gone through so much in our years during the flop house that I've seen so many movies that bore me so much more than this movie.

This movie, like I there's something It has a uh, quicksotic charm to it. Yeah, I'm just baffled by why anyone did it That makes me kind of it's kind of lovable in a weird way. I'm so glad that doing this podcast for eight and a half years has accomplished something Yeah, you hate nothing but trouble slightly less So that's my feelings on it. It's it's it's just such a weird movie that I kind of stuck almost in around me a little bit. Did you uh, did you give John our categories? Oh, well, you just said them. I mean, a good good bad movie. I know. Yeah. Good bad bad bad bad bad bad. I think that these are

self explanatory categories. I think I think you're humoring somebody who's drunk and wasn't paying attention. That's me Stewart. So I think doing this for years, you should know what is the third. So the categories are good bad bad bad. And a movie you kind of like. And a movie you kind of like.

So it's a movie that actually like transcends the like, oh, I'm just watching this bad movie for fun. Like irony. And you're like, oh, I enjoyed this on a sincere level. But a good bad movie, something that you're like, this is stupid, I'd watch this with friends and have some yucks. And bad bad is just get it away.

Yeah, get it away. Which this movie is still a bad bad movie. As a child, I would say that this is a good, great movie. I love this thing. Grow as a grown up, I do not like it at all, it's terrible. Did you enjoy it as a child? Did you watch it as a child? I watched it a bunch as a child. I'm sure. I think I like the carnival aspect of it, and I like horror movies a lot. So I think this, I'm the rob zombie in this story.

One of us has to be. I really feel that it verges on bad, bad, just because I've rarely been physically repulsed in a way. Well, not physically. I see gory movies, I see weird movies, like I saw those Rob Zombie movies. Like, that's some hard stuff to sit through, but I found it compelling. In this case, I found it mind-bendingly confusing as to why a human, whatever thing, another human would even look at such a thing. It didn't sell its imagery in any way.

It didn't make it, and yet I have to say that I think that it was truly an expression of one individual's personal creativity, and wildly misguided, and a grotesque train wreck that I'm glad to have seen after all of these years. So I don't want to say it's a good, bad movie like, hey, you put this on, you have a great time. But I think I have to say that it's a bad, bad movie, but every now and then, I think we need to say that it's a bad bad movie, but

Every now and then I think we need to see what a really bad bad movie is to remind us Character building experience. Yeah, it is it's not boring. It's like I agree with Dan. It's not boring. It's compellingly awful and there are many many many questions that it raises that I like thinking about now No, no question. Like, could it have been good? And I think it could have been good. And if people say nothing but trouble to you, you will think of things from this movie. Like there are images that will haunt you. I would imagine.

Oh, you never go away. Like, I think I am with Dan only in that. I don't, I didn't hate it as much as I did as a child. If only because I now have the emotional stability as an adult to be able to say like, no, that is not the world that I live in. I recognize that this is a, this is a strange way of viewing things. As opposed to when I was a kid when I was like, I like, I've seen these people in other movies

and they're really funny. So if I think this is horrifying and not enjoyable, like, am I wrong here? Right. It made you question your own sanity. Yeah, so it's a bad, bad movie. But by watching with you guys, I feel like I've exercised some of those demons. Yeah. I think it's because we've all had some good therapy. And I don't know. I still don't know why as a kid, I watched it so many times just because it was on. Right. But like, there are certain scenes in this. There's a shot in the movie where Taylor Negron and his sister

are just walking in a funny way into a parking garage. And like that moment was burned into my brain. And like, there's so many random shots in this that I remember so well. And I'm like, okay, now I can kind of lay them to rest a little bit, you know. I've delivered the mummified corpse of mama's baby tour. And now maybe she'll leave my own children alone.

That's totally not gonna happen. Spoiler learnedly in a mom. That's the one. You want this right? And mom was like, no. I don't want this garbage. I'm a child. Put ball spike.

I'm gonna turn into a wig and crawl around the ground a little bit again. So Dan, that sounds good, right? Yeah. Dan is busy adjusting a cat in some way. And so, Dan... Why did we add some group therapy tonight? Yeah, I mean, this was very helpful for me.

You guys worked through a lot of stuff, having seen this movie many times, and I've worked through something, having never seen it before. Sorry, Archie somehow managed to get his cone off, and I had to put the cone back on. Archie got neutered recently, so Archie's Dan's cat. Not a human in the apartment. Not a human with a cone. get his cone off. And I had to put the cone back on. Arti got new to it recently. So Richie's dance can't not a human in the apartment. Not a human with a cone. This is it. Yeah. Oh, by the way, Dan keeps a number of humans. Prisoner in his home and they make some work on some, I mean, make some go through Mr. Bone bone stripper. Now

what they, but what listeners may never have known is that Dan is a kind of gothic, grotesque justice of the piece in a tiny town known as Dan's apartment. You are in Pennsylvania. You're inviting some terrible fan art, Alex. Yeah, I don't want that. Yeah, Dan, you already have a picture of you as the, this is one of the few movies where I feel like I've never seen an image of it online and there's a reason for that because they're hard-fying to look at. Yeah, it's not and there's a reason for that, because they're hard to look at.

Yeah, it's not like you go to Comic-Con and you're like, oh look at all this great nothing but trouble cosplay. Oh, it's a little bit of a hole. That would be amazing. It's a color's bobo and little devil. It's little, it's little debble. I looked in the credits. I now have a cat in my lap. The formation cat is luffed up into my, uh, luffed up, luffed up. Yeah. That's the sound of heart makes luffed up, luffed up, luffed up. Um, but, uh, my laughing. I

heard you, I heard you not to skip ahead on your podcast machine, even though we're going to take a little moment to ask you for some money. Yeah, we're going to shake you. Hopefully some money will fall out. Now, everyone has money that they use to buy lunch during the school day. We want you to give us your lunch money. In exchange, normally for nothing, in exchange, normally for not being beaten. Yeah. For this case, it's an exchange for high quality audio entertainment. We'll keep the other bully podcasts away from you. It's cool, it's cool. It's great. Yeah, I mean, if you're anything like me, you have a neutered cat in your lap.

You're a massage or a glanzo? That I'm desperately trying to keep from leaping across into my co-hosts allergic face. Because much like a ghost to Dan Acroid, Archie wants nothing more than to shove his face in my lap. And me being allergic, I don't like that. There's so many episodes now where I've had to maintain focus on what I'm saying while I'm shoving a cat. I don't like that. Yeah.

And I've had to talk while playing with a cat with some kind of a colored string toy. Yeah, that's a big cross to bear. No, what I was gonna say is if you're anything like me, podcasts are actually a pretty major source of entertainment in your life. I listen to them more often than not when I'm commuting.

I listen to them when I'm walking around in the city. Do tours probably? Yeah, fashioning new cat cones. Yeah, exactly. In the dark of the night when you're keeping the demons at bay. I'm just saying, I need some other voice to drown out the one in my head. There's source of the night when you're keeping the demons at bay, I'm just saying, I need some other voice to drown out the one in my head.

There's a source of entertainment for me that. Not just entertainment, information, companionship, comfort in the dark. Yeah. I want to know some digital underground facts. I will go to John Hodgeman. Let me just kind of break it down for you guys. And maybe this is a little too harsh.

Ultimately, we're all alone in the universe Okay, no one will ever be inside our head and nobody will ever touch our soul but We can have the closest possible thing to that when we form the intimate connection that comes with listening Where better to listen than from a collection of Talented and intelligent and articulate individuals known as the maximum fun network. If you want to feel a little bit less like one star in a vast expanse of darkness, donate.

I'm just saying that I get more enjoyment and entertainment out of podcasts than I do out of many services that I pay money. Whoa. Like what, erotic massage? Yeah. Yeah. Like, I'm not saying anything. I'm not saying anything.

I mean, it was strongly implied in the advertisement. Like, what's the one where they oil up and then they rub their whole body out? And you get more entertainment out of podcasts than I get from erotic massage. That would be madness. Right. Well, I think we've all established that podcasting

is worth more than erotic massage. Question is, how much money are you going to spend for us to give you a happy ending on this podcast? You both podcast. That ended with us just narrating a happy ending for the audience. So let's not do that. But what do you get if we say we mentioned there's a $5 entry barrier? Right. So $5 a month, you get access to all the exclusive bonus members only content that Max Fun offers. This is literally hundreds of hours of special shows that the flop house is recorded, that other podcasts like Judd Sean Hodgman and all the other podcasts that you love at Max Fun Fun have recorded just four donors. And not only do you get this year's bonus content, but all of the previous year's

bonus content, it's tons of fun. It's a ton of great stuff. It's a ton of great stuff. It's a ton of great stuff. I can specifically say that we did two live shows this year already at the Bell House to sell out shows. One of them is going to show up in your regular feed at some point. But if you want to hear what we thought about the entourage movie, the only way to do that is to donate to Max Fun at the five

dollar a month or better level because then you will get the bonus episode where we talk about entourage. The only other alternative way to kidnap us, make us watch it again and then have us talk about it. Yeah, that's right, if you're Dan Ackerwood, you probably could send agents to kidnap all of us and bring bring us to your weird Canadian mansion. And go soon go. Apply us with a crystal head vodka and make and make us do it or make you guys do it again in me for the first time. I hope I get kidnapped with you by the way. That means a lot. Many things that I wish one one of the many reasons why I wish I was the producer and charge at MTV's cribs because I would tell Louis Vuitton to Dan Hacker, it's crib. Right.

Today on the TV. I'm assuming it's either Scarface memorabilia. It's a lot of motor cycles. What's it like at Jeffrey Combs's house? We decided to find him. Yeah, we, but Dan, you mentioned an important thing. Today on the ribs, Brian, you mentioned an important thing. So Dan, I'm not a rips Brian, you know. Dan, you mentioned an important thing, which is these,

these, thank you gifts that you get are cumulative. So as you give, let's say you give it the $10 per month level, you'll get the chance to choose a bandana, which of each, they're one of 22 bandanas, each one designed specifically for each of the shows at maximum fun. They're very sharp indeed, but again, not cutting sharp, just good looking sharp. Yeah, absolutely.

And then you would also get all the bonus content. And if you go up again, and now I'm turning a page, what's the next one behind the scenes? What's the next game of the next level, John? That's the Max Fund Adventure Necessity Collection. At $20 a month, you're gonna get a multi-tool, like a Swiss Army knife, right? With the Max Von Logo, hot chocolate packet, a paracord bracelet and camping toilet paper.

You get toilet paper. So like camping supplies, yeah. If you're trapped in the woods, if you're trapped in the woods, that's when we get trapped in the woods often. I think we get lost in the woods. Well, the theme of all of these is adventure. We got locked into the podcasting is the adventure of's often. People get lost in the woods. Well, the theme of all of these is adventure. You got lots of it. Yeah.

The podcasting is the adventure of the mind. So, you know, audiobooks are movies for your mind, as we know. And let's say you're you're you have a little bit extra money to spend maybe you're one of these characters from maybe one of these heroes from this movie we just saw. and maybe you're one of these characters from, maybe one of these heroes from this movie we just saw. You already know. You do nothing lawyer and there's do nothing rip off artist stock tip to try.

You already know your car phone and your GPS and your Beetlejuice patterned couch. Right, you still have, you have $35 a month leftover that you wanna throw over to maximum fun. Well, guess what, you get a vacuum thermos with the maximum fun logo on it, plus the adventure kit, plus all of the maximum fun logo on it, plus the adventure kit, plus all of the bandana, plus everything else, the bonus content.

And if you send in, if you emailed to me at Hodgman at maximumfund.org, your receipt, I will mispronounce your name on Instagram and Tumblr and Twitter, all my social needs. Wow. That's not even official. No, that's just extra. That's extra. That's extra. That's extra. That's extra.

And I don't think you have mentioned this part, but when you show up to work with that thermos, everyone else will be super jealous of you. Yeah. Yeah. How warm your liquids are. Or cold. Or cold. It's a good point.

Thermos are, they go both ways. That's all I've ever been saying. They're bifunctional. They're bifermis. Yeah, and look, it just, I think it's, it bears repeating again that bears not really. That podcasting may be sort of a newer sort of entertainment stream in your life, but it's one that I think

that we all have sort of come to really rely on and really enjoy, and if you feel like it's something of a worth to you, why not throw some money at it? Why not show that worth by supporting it, supporting art that you like? There's been a lot of talk over the past 15 to 20 years about this kind of free economy and how information wants to be free. That's total bullshit. Information wants money. So, information being us.

We want money. We're like, it's using information broadly as content. May I dare say, though, that maximum fund does not want money. It requires money to continue to bring these podcasts to you that there is a substantial amount of overhead that even the occasional sponsorship does not entirely cover. It's not our desire to come to you and ask for money. But I do think that you obviously, you guys have a real community with your fans. We have the Judge John Hodgman podcast

have a community with our fans. And I think there's a lot of overlap. And in general, maximum fun feels like a big large family. There is a sense of communal ownership over these shows. And now is the time when we have to come to you and say, if you like what we do, we hope that you'll support us. Because otherwise, the lights will go out, and the podcast will go dark.

And oh, we just ran out of money, guys Sorry. Never mind. Sorry. It was that one that one person Joe in Altona, Pennsylvania. Your hand was hovering over the donate button and you decided not to do that. We needed you. Sorry. Yeah. Which makes a good point. We should do it right now. Yes. Right immediately. So you don't forget. Right. Pause this right now. We're just let. So sorry. You make a good point. Which is a good point. We should do it right now. Yes. Right immediately. So you don't forget. Right.

Pause this right now. We're just letting it keep playing. I don't know. And go to... Open another window. Go to maxonfund.org slash donate. Maximumfund.org slash donate. And just do it right now before you forget.

Yeah. There's not that they don't need that much information. Just your credit card information. Right. And the money goes directly to the podcast that you listen to. You get to select. You select the podcast called the flop house or judge on Hodgkin, adored to the flop house. And then the money goes to there with some of the amount of it going to maximum funds general operating costs.

But the vast majority of the. And there's a small 45% processing fee that goes to me. Small 20% it's less than a majority. No, a portion of it goes to the network as a whole, but the larger portion of it goes directly to the podcast that you choose to tick off as your favorite as you make your donation. And if you're already a donor, consider the fact there's a bunch of new shows out there that we've just launched this year that might want your support as well.

So you could increase your donation. Yeah, you can become a new donor, you can become an upgrading donor if you're a current donor. And you can upgrade, you can get a $100 a month, $200 a month will get you automatic registration at Max Funcon. Yeah, for a place of lowly overhead. if you're one of those Brazilian-aires, Oh, famous.

You don't have to tell me what that means. And you've been to Max Funcon. I have been to Max Funcon. It's a good time, right? It's an incredibly good time. Have you guys not been to Max Funcon? No, we've never been. I think, can we say this?

I don't know. I don't know if you can say anything. Dan, why don't you keep your trap, shall I? I'm not saying anything. We'll talk more about that later. But look, we kind of... Max Funcon is a great time, that's all. We come to you once a year asking this,

which is all the more important that you, if you're interested in donating, you do it while you're thinking of it, do it now. That's how we were able to lure Judge John Hodgman into our layer of deceit and sexual stuff. Yeah, that one piece of Popeye's chicken didn't cost nothing. No, certainly didn't.

Yeah, I just realized. Invest in the business. I'm not getting my money's worth here. But the point is, go to maximumfund.org, forward slash donate. We really appreciate it. We appreciate the support. Again, the money goes to the entertainment that you like and you choose.

And keeps it going. And keeps it going. And that will continue. And you will feel good. And you know. And instead of like a terrible creep who steals. That's what you are now. Well, wait, I'll give you that sense of superiority next year when the pet pledge drive comes along and you're like,

hmm, I already support. Yeah. The same way that whenever I see someone from a charity, I already donate to on the sidewalk and they go, excuse me, sir, do you have a moment to talk about this? I go, I don't have to, am I keep walking? I already donate to your charity. And then you fall onto a conveyor belt and ride right

through Mr. Bones, Mr. Bones, conveyor belt and ride right through Mr. Bones, Mr. Bones, Tripper. Mr. Bones, Tripper is a fun... I like to believe that... Is a joke we made earlier. Yeah, for the foreign release of this movie, they change the image to say like, send your Bones, Tripper or like, miss your phone. Miss your Bones, sleep, hey.

Bones, Tripper, son. Yeah, for the collectible cards. Hair Bones, Tripper. Maximumfund.org slash my name. Maximumfund.org slash. Donate, please. Donate. Okay, what's the next part of this podcast? The next podcast is where we take a few moments to answer letters from listeners. Oh, man. You need a, I'm going to get a little refresher. All right. Mr. John Hodgman is gonna go get another.

I just realized I gotta get more than my piece of chicken. That reminds me, while he's getting up that we might wanna take a few moments right now, take a few moments, the three or four of us to listen to the letters, to think about them and really give a good reply. Maybe something that might change some lives. Maybe something that'll get us high fives when we meet the writer of the letter in person in person. Are you saying there's a chance that I could meet the flop house probably not not. Well, Stuart, yes, because he works in a public place.

Dan's got a lot of time on his hands, and he'll probably be there too. But Ellie, it's kind of a mysterious sort. A recluse they say, packing his lair, unable to leave. He hates the sunlight, hates the light of the moon, light of any kind, natural air. The laughter, the smiles, it strikes him like spikes, and light poison, don't expect to meet him,

but student Dan, sure, why not? And you'll tell him, thanks for reading my letter on the fluff house tonight. This letter song was brought to you by me wasting time. That's how it works. That's how it works. Oh, Dan's already. Should I sing some more? Are you not prepared? No, I just got a message. Dan getting over the orgasm from my song. I just got a message. Dan getting over the orgasm from my song. I just got a message that people are literally scared that this is the last flop house because

of that offhand remark you said one time that when we did another bit trouble, it'll be the last flop house. No, that was just a joke because I hate the movie. This is not the last flop house. If anything, it's the beginning of a new era in which we won't do the show anymore. I'm just kidding. We'll keep doing it. MaxMumFund.org slash donate. Yeah, we're friends. IRL, right?

We are friends. So Dan, do we have some letters or should I sing another song for Wars? I got it. So this first letter is a very well timed letter. Let's say that. Dear floppers, nothing but trouble. Are you going to watch it? Yes. It's from Chris Lasting with Helder writes, and I'm back. I just wanted to say, what did I miss is the name of a song from the popular musical Hamilton, but it also describes the question I have

because I was in the kitchen when something happened to someone sing a song. I hope I didn't song to song, it counts, they're abrupt ending. Did somebody say that they missed the song? It seemed like a wakein' from my ancient slumber to sing another number, about letters and writing and writing and letters from us to you, from you to us, from them to them, from all to all. But Elliot, do I actually have to write a letter to a stranger? I don't want to do it. I have problems with expressing myself. That's understandable and something we might need to work on.

You're a great guy. You should be confident in your abilities. But no, because the strangers have written to us. They're strangers, but there's no dangers, because it's through a letter, unless they figured out some way to kill with words. Probably not. And so let's read this letter from Chris. Last name withheld. Dan said it was timely, but why? But how? We'll get the answers to those questions when the song comes to its eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh of our time, ding dong date has been settled. I turn your tits to the second greatest scene in the history of cinema. I speak of course of the scene in Ghostbusters where that ghost gives Dan Acroix to blowjob in his dream. Never heard of it. Dan Acroix? I see related to Peter Acroix. While most people's attention is focused on the weird cross-eyed face that Ray makes in the throws of sexual satisfaction. Yep.

What happens next is where the questions arise. Namely, he falls out of bed. It should be taken as red that Ray has an erection in his dream. However, one can then safely assume that there's a good chance that Ray in real life has an erection as well. Thus, Rex danger, erection detective is on the case. Thus, the question is,

Rex danger. You're Rex danger. The question is the key is short for a reaction. That's when he wept into my office. He had a single game that went all the way up. He laid it on the desk and I took a look at the case. That's true, Mr. Danger tonight. That dude had someone trying to steal it. And I took a look at the case. It was a nice penis. You got that. That's true, Mr. Danger.

That dude had someone trying to steal it. That dude had third leg that went for miles. The question that arises as simple. The case of the perloined penis. Did Ray fall on his erect penis when he fell out of the... Did he then break his penis? I really assumed that for the rest of the movie, Ray is trying to fight Ghost and save New York while also dealing with a broken penis.

Is there anything in Dan Acquod's performance that indicates that he is trying to subtly indicate that yes, Raymond Stance had a broken penis. Thanks for your insight. If anyone can settle this matter, she'll Chris last name with hell. Someone was falling out of bed with an erection many a time. Who's, she can't break your penis that way. No, what probably happened is that it got stuck in the ground with like a boi noise and he like, we've heard back and forth a little bit. You probably had it removed and put on his nose.

As evidence, yeah, by the film. Yeah, I imagine there was probably a discard subplot where Ray broke his penis in half and he had to go on a quest to find A suitable second half of his penis. Well the ghost of his now broken penis became like a little character that was his mascot Uh-huh, and I think over time one of the many sausages that slimer accidentally It's that scene Accidentally Accidentally, accidentally. Accidentally. I was awning.

And his hand, I guess, was on his own accord just through sausages in. If that scene were just removed from the movie forever, it would be a bit... Would there be an uproar? I mean, I guess there would be because there are so many weird creep dudes who hate the new Ghostbusters because they're ladies. So it's like how dare you take out my blue jaw to our listener base. But this is, but this is more like a, I love you guys too, but come on.

This would be more like a special edition, like when they replaced the, in ET where they took the guns out and put walkie talkies in. So you're saying they take, is they have a walkie talkie in place of his penis? Yeah, right. He's calling somebody. Yeah, he's getting a blowjob from a grotto Do back they put a they put a more animated do back in place of his There's a bunch of little robots flying around for no reason. I actually had to Ray ma boogie. I had to think

Think for a second about what a romto was I had to think for a second about what a ronto was. It just really made me, maybe so happy that I had forgotten. I finally have escaped the gravitational pull of that movie and I don't need to know about it anymore. No, it's good to. You helped me. I've clearly moved on in my life. Thank you, Stuart. That's his name, right, Stuart? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Close enough. No, I'm creative Next letter Dan sure we got to move along someone was spending a lot of time earlier. This is from me time to move along

You've got to read all those letters. They are only getting better. This is the second one now I'm going to have to pay money to Paul Williams. This is from Steve Last name withheld who writes, I'm at work right now. Steve Laubers, do you watch Family Feud? Please do, I host it. Sorry about that mis-university. What about Steve?

I think it was. They're great Steve. Right enough buttons. Let me know. I'm at work right now watching Sphere. That's not my job, fortunately. Spoiler alert. But I think Queen Latifa is getting murdered by a jellyfish. It's not good.

I forgot she was in that movie. Anyway, I've been listening to some old episodes and hearing the old square space plugs. I've noticed at least three episodes where you've mentioned the Getty Images plug-in, at which time Elliot makes a joke about images of the still Getty. This leads me to believe that Elliot is not funny, or at least needs inspiration. Whoa. Whoa. Here are other hilarious Getty's secrets.

Yeah, because you know what doesn't make things funny doing them more than once. That's never been a funny thing. Here are other hilarious Getty's secret. He's gonna punch up your Getty jokes. This is unacceptable. No, I'll allow it. I'd like to hear what he has to say. Oil industrious Jay Paul getty.

No. Also lends itself to other humorous references including the Getty Conservation Institute and Getty Foundation. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Humorous references. Ringside frontman and young gunstar. Now it's our getty. That's acceptable. Yeah, because belt is our get it acceptable.

Yeah, because the Altho Zara is a funny name. That's true. He's related to J Paul getty. I thought he was a star lost highway. That's a bigger rush front man. Getty Lee. Canadian politician Don Getty. But he spells getty Lee correctly.

Yeah. Yeah. Getty's bird, either the battle or address. No, on the nose on the nose. Too much respect for the men who gave their lives for the North. Right. And it's on the penis nose too. Gettie.js, the hilarious full stack open source MVC framework.

Don't know what any of those words were. That's a great joke. I like to love that one. The new and right is Gettie references and future podcasts best Steve last name with held. P.S. Queen Lutipha died. I just enjoyed a close up shot of Dustin Hoffman pulling slimy tentacles out of her nostril.

This movie blows. So I guess that's- What's his first name? It's Steve's. And his last name? We don't have it here. What's up? Getty, right?

Yeah. Steve Getty, thanks. For your submission of your packet. Mm-hmm. Yeah. We'll keep you on file. We'll keep you on file. We'll keep you on. It's like a disease.

Yeah, it's hard to turn it off. Yeah, because it's so much fun to make up songs. But then you try to set us up for a song. I don't know what could be. I appreciate the burn on Elliot, but we've got time for just one more letter. Is it if it's the last time we had time for just one more letter and involved crying having boobs? There's nothing or it was like, Dan's the best flopper I love him the most. Signed man to collie.

Signed not a different Dan. There's neither anything about me nor anything overtly sex your old about this last letter So this letter goes like this I know I was Sex wow I was hoping I Were hoping and you will you weren't no listen? I was hoping and you would be having some sex wall feelings When you've got that feeling, sex, you need some sex you all the feelings.

So this letter goes like this, since you talked about Bizuka Joe strips in your Aloha episode, I'm taking this as a signal that you finally decided to switch from being a bad movie podcast to instead revolving around comic strips. Isn't it weird that in the 30s a bunch of strips were released that were still around today but have nothing to do with their original focus? That is weird, that's true. Thimble Theater became all about the Erassable Sailor Papa rather than focusing on Castroil. The terrible brother of Olive. Or Thimble's. Fritzy Ritz would change for the better once Fritzy accepted

her lovable niece and Nancy. And obviously, things shifted for the worst once blondie finally settled down from her wild clapper days and married Dagwood. Also, how Snuffy Smith just took over Barney Googles. Yes, I was hoping. I was hoping one of us wouldn't bring that up. And I am not surprised it was you. What twist would you like to see in other comic strips? With Dennis the Minus, finally Kilmister Wilson

and realized the utility of his minising waves, would Dilbert finally get fouled? And then it becomes an Oz-type prison strip? With Dilbert finally get fired for sexually harassing Alice, making jokes around bad movies is great and all, but I think this new comic strip focus will make the podcast more successful than ever. Lip taking the years, the kid from FoxTras.

Well, which kid? There's three kids in FoxTras. There's the two boys and the girl. Yeah, but I think the young one is Jason Fox, the star of the Bill Ammond. So there's a question. Was there a question? Were we given a question there? Who's basically saying,

what are you guys wasting time making fun of movies for when there is this antique art form that no one cares there? I was basically saying, what are you guys wasting time making fun of movies for when there is this antique art form that no one cares about? And they're like, just so. So I should say this other antique art form that no one cares about. Yeah, if it's not YouTube, nobody cares about it. So there was the great twist that I wish had been kept with

was that one week of Garfield strips where he wakes up and the house is empty and there's cobwebs everywhere. And the implication, I guess, is that the rest of the strips were all a dream during his last moments before he died. Because at the end, he's wandering around and John has gone and Odie has gone. Like nobody's lived in this house for years. And he's like, there's captions that are like, think back, back to the better times, back, back.

And the last thing that happened? Yeah, it's a five day storyline. And the last panel, the last day, is he's back with John and Odie. And I think the intention was that those weeks were a dream. But when it comes off, it comes off implying that the rest of the strip is him. The whole strip was a dream. Yeah. And he's like, I can't, I'm going insane from my solitude.

Like I have to think about this before I... I kind of rush through it. I thought you put in that lasagna. I thought you were describing Garfield in a post-apocalyptic environment. And that was something I would like Garfield fury road is something I would be very interested in reading about. That would be pretty fun. There's no post-apocalyptic comic strip.

I'm just kind of surprised there isn't because it's such a go-to thing. Right, but the only people who read comic strips now are elderly people who are thinking about death all the time anyway. Everybody is telling them. It's not fun for them to engage in a premise where all life is ended. It's more fun for them to engage in a premise where Drabble says something.

Where's Shoe is hanging out at the tree bar. The twist I was always hoping for would be that that Slylock Fox would finally realize that Jack the Ripper is all part of one giant Masonic conspiracy. I know somebody max mouse. Yeah, I'm. Max mouse MD has been doing it. You know, I'm sure that the person who's writing in is

familiar with this website. And maybe you guys are to Josh Reads.com Yeah, oh, yeah by Josh frollinger or I don't know how to pronounce the last name fro It was about right fro linger fro linger fru h l i n g e r but he tears apart comic strips and a delightful manner very funny way daily and I feel like that's covered tear. I don't want to tell you guys how to not improve your podcast, but I think you guys got movies covered. I don't know you need to worry about comic strips. I mean, we talk about them every now and then. We've

mentioned how funky winker bean is depressing and makes no sense. Right. Right. And when we eventually watch the Rose's Rose movie, we'll talk about the comics. True. Yes. You know, it was that property. You're going to get the movie deserves. Would you work as a writer on a funky winker bean movie? I don't see why I wouldn't. How funky is the movie? Yeah.

As funky as winker beans, that's not very much. Who are you going to get to play the big-end teacher? Because he's like the most important character, right? Well, I thought the question is less. Chris Firman's class seems like the obvious less character, right? Yeah. How much do you even know about

Funky Winger being stewed? I don't know that much. Yeah. I just remember, I told the story many times, but there was one where there was like somebody committed suicide. Oh, yeah. Every couple of weeks somebody dies

or has cancer or something terrible. It's a profoundly depressing comment. I remember as a kid, I rarely read the daily strips. And I always read the Sunday comics. And every fungi winker bean was, or every other funky winker bean, was just one panel of somebody like sitting next to a hospital bed where their wife was,

or like looking at the picture of someone who had died recently recently when I was like It's just a series of teblos sadness. Just same guy Actually, that it's who who also had that comic about the The TV anchor who got murdered right John Darling. Yeah. But that was like a fun thing. That he got murdered? But it was supposed to be like a murder mystery type thing, right? I feel like that was like the,

it wasn't that like the end of the comic. Yes. Yeah, I guess that's true. Dan is correct. This guy is very straight. I mean, that he may have had a He was like a John Donnie, I mean, like a Phil Donnie, he figure who, you know, he hosted

a talk show and it was sort of a media send up. And then they were getting canceled. He's like, fuck it, I'm gonna murder him. And then much, much later in fucking Winker being like, they solved the mystery. They solved the murder. Yeah, right. There were all those people who were wondering about it. Really?

Yeah. It's crazy. They solved the murder of a, in a different commentary. Yeah. It's crazy. It's crazy. I didn't bring it in. Do they find out why crock was such a dick to everybody? I want to know it's up with tank. It's all the mystery white. Which was very amazing. He's like a high school football coach or something. I don't remember that one. Oh there's the one what's the one you missed the most?

I mean, that isn't made anymore, or from, because I don't read comic strips regularly the same way, like, one that's still going on or no. No, one that isn't going, I guess. I mean, like Calvin Hobbs. Calvin, yeah, Calvin. That's right. That's one of the few strips where like,

there's, I can't think of any periods in it where it lost it, you know? It was classic from the first frame to the last frame. It's like beautiful to look at. But I wonder if would you write a Calvin and Hobbes movie if Bill Waterston was not on board? I don't think I would unless it was a lot of money. I mean, how much money? How much money? it was a lot of money.

I mean, like how much money? How much? Like 10 million dollars. Like more than they would ever say, write a movie, a million dollars. I don't know. That would keep saving a lot of stakes. It's true. I mean, he can't save me. He doesn't really. He just said, he's a big email. He's a big email. Say any love. He's stocked by all stakes now.

He frees him for later. He's too rich to steak. Yeah, and just sitting me later on, you'll be like, these are the steaks that my integrity bought for you. It's the same, I would say the same thing to him that John Oliver said to us when I joined him and some other people once at a sushi place. Listen, this is a name dropping.

He said, I'll take the check. And he went, no, no, no, and he goes, no, no, I'll take the bill, I'll pay for it. I got my love guru check today and then we go okay and he goes as he goes with the registry Goes by the way this makes you all complicit in the production of the love guru Tell Santa be like you can enjoy those steaks, but you made Bill Watson very unhappy That was Hollywood, Kaelin with another star tale our drama behind the scenes But I what it I wonder if the guy from Funky Wanker Bean went through something like Johnny Hart did

where, but in reverse, like Johnny Hart found God and stopped drinking. And so BC became a very proselytizing strip and Wizard of it, I guess he decided it was fine as was. He didn't have to change it. Right, where was the Crusades? So I fit in with what he was doing. Where is the Funky Wanker Bean? And obviously he was doing. Where is the funky week of being was the guy?

And obviously, he was in a video and did and Joe both sides. B.C. B.C. was always sort of in the evangelical mode because it was like humans living with dinosaurs. It was a creationist comics from the beginning. It's true, I guess. But the, are there dinosaurs in B.C.? Yeah, yeah. All right.

And they make jokes about how that one cave woman is too fat and things like that. And it's like, you're a dinosaur. Why would you make that joke? I don't understand. Do you know what the name of that character is? No, I don't. The cave woman is too fat?

Fat broad. Really? Yes. Do you think it was never really a progressive stream? No. No. The, I wonder if the funky wankerbie guy had a moment that was the reverse of that where he lost faith in God. And he was. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No very good. Wow. That's the icing on the cake. Well, I guess, I guess, what was his name? Who wrote that letter? Less? Oh, wait, no. Less than an error, dude.

What a fan teacher. I don't know. That was the who wrote the letter. Who wrote the letter? The kid from FoxTraders, all who. Oh, that's right. Jason from FoxTrad, I guess you got your wish. Okay, we turned it into a comic strip podcast.

So what's the next part of this podcast? No, the next final part of the podcast is a band recommend movies that we have seen usually recently but not necessarily that we would recommend instead of the movie that we watched tonight. Okay. Okay. Who goes first? I'll go briefly. I rewatched a movie that I saw for the first time when I was 13 and hadn't seen Sensei watch the sting, which is a movie that I feel like almost immediately did not get a lot of credit from centipiles because... I mean one best picture. Yeah, but it was...

So, yes, it's an underrated met you know, I said a file It was it was like it came out in the 70s and it was already a movie out of time because it was a very old-fashioned movie even When it was made it was a throwback it was an old Hollywood movie, but it was also like set in an older time period But shot as though it were the 70s Yeah, it's got that George Roy Hill Yeah, you know that George Roy Hill, yeah. You know, that George Roy Hill, yeah. But we all know it. That George Roy Hill, yeah.

Come on, Janelle, is that George Roy Hill, yeah. Thomas Jarts, he was into W, huh? But, um, 100.1 radio die. It's a movie that really, I feel like it's a very similar, I mean, it's definitely a very similar con, con man film kicks off that sort of, uh, we're talking about the sting.

The sting. Right. This is your recommendation. Yes. Okay, gotcha. It comes on recommending the sting too. No, the thing is like you watch the sting today and it has one twist and it's not a surprising twist at all.

If you've seen any con man film, is there a score? At all. You're a funny thing. What do you know of twist, do you think? the con man film is there a score at all? You're a fine thing. Well, then you know what's with you. Scorpion. Did you see that movie scorpion twist? Is that hot new dance?

No. Now, the way that you do the dance is you put a live scorpion in your shoe. The name of the dance is the scorpion twist. Twisting from the pain as it stings you with its venom. Nothing better in a dance where they tell you. I know all the song. No, it's just that the movie is all building up to one twist that is not surprising in the least if you've seen any sort of movie that has a twist at all.

But that's because... Like, six cents? Right. Turns out they're all ghosts. It's because. The movie was at the past. They're all dead. The thing is the movie was at the past, they're all dead. This thing is such an early example of the poem.

They're all. They're all, what, what is it said in the 30s? It's a 20s, right? Or 20s or the 30s? They're all living in a colony where they're acting like it's the 20s or the 30s. But in fact, when they walk outside the studio, it's the 1970s. That's right. the 20s or the 30s, but in fact, when they walk outside the studios, the 1970s. Twist is they were making a movie called The Sting the whole time. Pulled on your heads.

Yeah, guess what? This is not a real sting. It's a movie. Turns out Robert Shaw was in on the whole time. Life's like a movie, right your own ending. Keep believing. Keep pretending. We just made the stay do the stingers the sting the stingies and you do the scorpion twist no but what I'll say about the movie is, it's just if you want, it's what it is is a testament to just old Hollywood charm. If you want to see a movie where you're just like, oh, this is carried along 100% on the

charm of Robert Redford and Paul Newman and the fact that you've got Robert Shaw as the bad guy and you've got character actors like Charles Durning and Ray Walson, like that's the beauty of it, just a movie that has. That's how it works. That is how it works. Like it's classic Hollywood big stars with great character actors. The, you know, there are a lot of things

that Chevy Chase was supposed to be able to do and didn't. And yet, even in this movie, I felt like at the beginning, I was like, this guy's got some classic Hollywood charm. Yeah. And if you were not thrown into this terrible plot, something could have happened. Now, if it's all lost.

And if he was not famously kind of unpleasant, I think it would have applied that another. At the time, it was not known to the public, I think. Yeah. How unpleasant he is. I think that was just among entertainers. Well, I have not seen this thing for many, many years and I will take your recommendation. All right. Anyone else? Yeah, so this is I hope you have a recommendation because that's the way that this part of the park. Yeah, so this is the parts of the podcast where I recommend a horror movie, I'm going to recommend 1989's Witch Trap. That is, which trap, not the sequel to Witchboard, which actually they set put on the VHS cover.

And I think in the opening credits, even though it's directed by the guy who directed Witchboard and directed Stuart Wellington favorite, Night of the Demons. Now Witchtrap is features a number of the same actors from night of the demons, including Lenea Quigley, who is also, yes, totally naked in this movie. And it is kind of the definition of like a good bad movie. Like you want to watch this, it's like a classic 80ss early 90s horror movie that you want to watch with friends people get killed there's a The the hero is this like wise cracking detective who has a terrible one-liner for every scene and people get killed in the stupidest ways possible

So I took and it's and it's shot very cheaply and weirdly. It's a super great movie to watch with friends. Which trap? And are witches trapped in it? Kind of. I don't want to get too in the plot. Why not? But it's kind of a witch. the movie is about a couple of ghost hunters who get hired. Yes. Okay, so there's some ghost hunters who get hired to clean out a house that is haunted by an old warlock. Now, the guy who owns the property needs to make some money off of it because he is, I guess, in debt. And his only option is to turn this haunted house into a haunted bed and breakfast because haunted houses are big business back in 1989.

I think they probably are now. Yeah, it's the internet. So he, but the problem is that he hired a state magician to kind of like make sure the house is more even though a little bit haunted. Basically, that a little bit of bonafide student uh... unfortunately that guy totally gets killed by the ghost so he has to hire these ghost hunters to go in

but he doesn't trust them to go alone so he has to hire in a private security company who are the best in the biz he's thinking so much money into the who come along with it because it's a couple million dollars he's losing all of it think about it if you want private, a private haunted bed and breakfast, I'd spend any amount of money. No amount of money is too much.

I'll back on the market. Yep. You're right. You shouldn't have described the plot. It all revolves around somebody eating a, it's a classic bed and breakfast sting. It's like the sting and it be haunted B and B in 1989. Now Robert Shaw shows up. It's like the keepers is what you're saying. Cotton, it's not as good as the in-key. I mean, keepers are really good. But no, this is a good like, once again,

if you've already seen none of the demons with your pals, just pop in a witch trap. All right. I haven't seen either of those films. Don't see them both. Don't see them both. I'll go recommend a movie now. No, you probably have something prepared, so I'll just say my thing.

Oh, okay. Because I got nothing. I haven't really been going to recommend. I couldn't remember any of the movies that I've seen in the past year. So I had to go back into my email to see what movie I bought on iTunes. And suddenly, I remembered, oh right, there was that night where I watched two movies. And the first movie I watched was the good one. And then the second movie I watched was the terrible one. And I'm only going to mention the terrible one because I'm sure you've done it on the podcast and I apologize if I've not heard it never know, but 1941. Oh, no, we haven't done this.

Yeah. Can I come back for that one? Because we do it. This another John Candy Dan Acroid film. Yeah. And another completely misguided a single creative vision that no one could say no to at that time. And it's unbelievably terrible. Did Spielberg directly?

Yeah, Spielberg directly. Spielberg was like the golden boy. And Zemeckis wrote it and like, Acroid I think knows how to make comedy. He does not have evidence for this movie. And like, Acurate, I think, knows how to make comedy, but doesn't know how to- He has evidence for this movie. But you know, like I think he understands comedy is some degree, but doesn't have direct to movie.

Spielberg knew how to direct a movie, but didn't know anything about comedy. And that's when I've read about behind the scenes, people were like, yeah, on the set, it wasn't funny, but everyone assumed like, Balushi's gonna pull it off. Right, this script doesn't seem to be very funny when we're shooting it. It doesn't seem to be funny, but Balushi's magic. So when it's on screen, he's's gonna pull it off. Right. This script doesn't seem to be very funny when we're shooting it.

It doesn't seem to be funny, but Balushi's magic. So when it's on screen, he's just gonna pull it off. And that is completely, the whole ethos of the movie is these people were funny and animal house. They'll do it again. We don't have to give them anything. We don't have to make anything. We don't have to set up anything.

They'll just mug and then look at boobs. And that's what the movie is. And it was startling how terrible and I'd seen it as a kid my dad took me to see it and I can't imagine time for you to learn about my work. But when you were a kid because I remember seeing as a kid and just like this movie like I just assumed it was good. I remember being entertained as a child probably because of boobs and I don't know if you're really sure. I remember being very confused by it because I was a very shy kid and I'm like, why is

my dad dating me to a boob movie? And it opens with a parody of the opening scene of Jaws, which was the only good thing about it until you realize just how it's profoundly misogynistic movie. But that's a terrible movie, we'll leave that for another time. The movie that I saw earlier that same night, in a similar jag of like, was this good or was this bad? Was broadcast news? Oh, that is.

That's a good movie. That's a good movie. Yeah, that's a really good movie. And I had forgotten, like it's one of the, I'd always taken it as one of my favorite movies, but it'd been years since I had seen it. And it was one of these movies where I had not appreciated just how deep into my DNA had

gotten. It's Albert Brooks is so funny in it. Yeah. The three of them William Hurt and Holly Hunter, right, are so incredible. And there's so many moments that I remember, not only that I remember perfectly, but that affect how I think about comedic and dramatic writing now and it's still incredibly pertinent. So I recommend that movie, highlight. So you heard it.

1941. No. Jama also checked out on the scorpion twist. Very underseen exploitation Spy movie from 1981 spy dance movie starring digital underground 1989 It was incredible Shock G plays all the characters So I'm gonna recommend a movie that in keeping with my usual trend is an old movie and a foreign movie

Which is a movie called the house, which is from South Korea in 1960. It was directed by Kim Ki-young. Well, I've got to go, you guys. It's this movie that in the West was not known until, or not well known until probably about five or six years ago when they remade it in Korea and suddenly people in the United States found out about the original. six years ago when they remade it in Korea and suddenly people in the United States, you know, found out about the original. And it's like if Alfred Hitchcock made a thriller where he went farther than Alfred Hitchcock

does in terms of like just shocking subject matter where this guy, this family is, the mother is a seamstress and the dad is a music teacher at a dormitory for women who work at a factory in South Korea. And they take on, there's a, one of the students has a crush on him and he spurns her and something terrible happens to her and her friend almost as revenge recommends a woman to be their housemate because they're looking for a housemate. And this woman just through her sheer force of will and just being crazy turns the house upside down and makes everybody her servants.

And to the point that it's like if Alfred Hitchcock made a movie where he's always threatening that a child's gonna die, I guess in one movie, even in a sabotage, a child dies. But like if Alfred Hitchcock made a movie where he's like, hmm, that annoying kid that you kind of don't want anything to bad to happen to because he's a kid.

Well, he's gonna fall down some stairs and die. And like, it's just so intense. Spoiler, spoiler. Sorry, that is a spoiler. But like, it's weirdly intense, but there, without a lot of scenes where people are in physical danger, but it feels so creepy and so oppressive and claustrophobic.

And there's an ending to it that should ruin it. or physical danger, but it feels so creepy and so oppressive and claustrophobic. And there's an ending to it that should ruin it. It should be a bad ending, but it actually works in a crazy way. And I don't wanna tell you what it is. But like, it's just this very intense psychodrama of this woman coming in and destroying these people's lives essentially, and it's really creepy and good.

You wanna say the name of it again. It's called the house made. No, I can't remember that. What's its name in Korean? That is a good question. I do not know how to pronounce it. Your pronunciation is fantastic. I guess according to Wikipedia,

I guess it would be something like Hanyu. Oh, house made. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, I've heard about that movie. But it's one that if you like There's a certain kind of cinephile that is a special likes Asian movies like this is one to see if you haven't seen And where would that be available because the movies we're talking about you can get I think it's I think criterion collection Has it actually so maybe available on their in their hulu collection. That's pretty good

I talked about you can only watch on YouTube in their Hulu collection. That's pretty good. The movie I talked about, you can only watch on YouTube. I'm just... We're mean, yes. Watch your video stores for a copy of Witchcraft. It's going to YouTube.

It's, we live in a weird world now where obscure foreign movies are easier to find than like... Old dumb and better films. Yeah, like cheapy American horror movies that used to flood the video market. Right. Like it used to be so easy to find a copy of Goolies, and so hard to see like any of Orson Wells' later movies, and now those are all available online.

Right. Goolies, I don't know where you're finding it. And don't even talk to me about Goolies, too, because I have been... Is that the one where they go to college? Goolies, three is Goolies, go to college. I can speak with authority about that. This is Dan's time to shine. As a great scene where the goolees put a plunger on a lady who's taking a shower and stretch

out her face in a like a loony-tune scrotune way. Oh, I got beetle juice thing. Yeah. So look for that. I guess, wait, hold on, can I switch my recommendation that goolees go to college? Is it like this thing? Goolees 3 go to college? Yeah,i's go to college. Is it from this thing? Gulli's three go to college? Yeah, that's right.

Right. Now, the Gulli's, we might have talked about this. Did they apply or have they get to college? They had a scary scholarship? They're just folks. They're folks by affirmative action. You know, they're folks by what's his face from Alex Trebek? No, no, from a...

Poverradi. In basketball. In the basketball scholarship. Body snatcher. Who's the guy? The winner Neemoy, Donald Satterlin. The lead. In which body snatcher?

The original. Kevin McCarthy. Yeah, Kevin McCarthy. He's the guy who reads the... The in-cantation. The in-cantation. Who's the goolees out of their goolee universe? I don't know, is that.

Yeah, but that doesn't explain how they get to college. You see the dean? He's a teacher there at the Gouli studies. He's a professional Gouli studies. Oh, okay. And I guess they're on the fucking syllabus. Yeah. One of the core classes is Gouli G.

Mm-hmm. So sure. So sure. Does this podcast ever end? Not really. No, it ends now. With an exhortation to go to maximumfund.org or it's slash donate. If you're still alive or awake and you're listening to this, it's the only way to make this

stop. Maximumfund.org slash donate. You only need 200 of you to navigate to maximumfund.org slash donate and we'll be able to do this podcast for another couple hours five Week. Yeah. All right. Well, yeah, let's shut this down. Thank you so much. Shut it down for good. For coming. Oh, it was totally my pleasure. And I am astonished you guys. I've not done 1941. I insist against your wishes to come back and and be here

when you watch it. We'll do it. Yeah. Let's do it right now. Okay. I wrote the movie machine. Okay. Here we go. I know the trouble stuck in the player. I guess we watched that first. All right. I'll go for it. Thank you for listening for the podcast. I've been a Dan McCoy. I've been Stuart Wellig done. Elliot Kaylen is also a robot for some reason. John Hodgman. Goodnight everyone. All around the world the same song. This single song.

Did you time stamp all your goofs? Because if not, we got to watch it again. I didn't time stamp my goofs and I remember now in the email he said, remember, time stamp your goofs. You don't mind if I try out my new character. I mean, you kind of got a recognizable voice. There's no one to capture. I don't know, Ellen.

I think you didn't. I had a vision for how my career is going to go. I want to get on the ground floor of this cool new character. You don't have to have a high-quality show. You have to get the character since Claude Bowen, little devil. Maximumfund.org Comedy and culture, artist owned

Listener supported