The Flop House - Ep. #228 - Collateral Beauty

Episode Date: April 1, 2017

We discuss Will Smith's spiritual sequel to Seven Pounds, Collateral Beauty. Meanwhile, Stu unveils his hot new nickname, Elliott tries to get Keira Knightly's attention, and the less said about Dan in this episode, the better. Wikipedia synopsis for Collateral Beauty Movies recommended in this episode: Wonder Boys Get Out Promise

On this episode we discuss collateral beauty. So if this was an x-rated movie, it would have been called collateral booty, right? And if kids made it, it would be called collateral duty. Hey everyone and welcome to the flop house, I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart the hustlin' Hoosier Wellington. Okay. And kind of thrown off by the not perfect timing of Stuart's Vera opening there, but still admiring that new nickname

you gave yourself. I'm Elliott comments on everything, Kaelin. Nice sip of a beer, Dan, while I was talking. And Stuart, great pins on your jacket. We're here in Dan's apartment, cleaner than usual, a lot less cat debris on the floor than I'm used to. And what are those in the corner?

A pair of shoes. Can't wait to hear what kind of adventures Dan's when heaven walking around in those in the big city. New York, Gotham, the big apple, Batman's home, Superman's don't. Spider-Man's place, the country's face, the financial center of the world, theater, capital of America.

Who's great, I can get the map that I really wanted during the movie and right now. So guys, what do you think of that nickname I put out there? I think I'm gonna take a, yeah, I'm gonna take it for a walk. No, I like it, I like it. What I like about this one, it tells us a little bit of your backstory and that you were a male hustler.

And two, it tells us the name of your favorite movie, Hoosiers. And then also, you know, something a low-known fact about Stewart is that he's, he's like a corn fed Midwestern boy. Give me that yummy corn. Yum, yum, yum. Feed me more of it. Now here's on the cob in a big bowl with butter. Maybe on pizza if you're in Europe, who cares?

Here's the thing though. Can you say that someone is corn fed anymore when Corn is by far the largest crop in the United States. It's subsidized at such a rate that it's actually would be more expensive not to grow Yeah, I mean, I can say whatever I want Judge Dredes now going to kick down the door and send me off to the fucking solid what is it the the solitary cells the fucking solitary, what is it? The solitary cells, the isolation cubes, which one is it? Arcom, Arcom Asylum. You can just freeze you up and put you in a... That's demolition man.

All right, sorry. What if demolition man? Okay, I'm with you. Judge Redd from the, Stavashel and movie judge Redd, and they had to fight Dredd from the movie Dredd. Okay, I mean, is that the pitch for a movie or a comic book? It's called Too Many Dudes.

Or like a Tumblr story. Tumblr story. Oh, and then they all have sex. We're just going to get together. I feel like too many dudes, like that's pretty ambiguous with the title. I think you're underselling your property. Okay, I wanted to call it too many dreads, but I thought people might think it was about a Jamaican hair, yeah, Jamaican hair.

Yeah, they're like, where's Dread Scott? Yeah, where's huge movie star Dread Scott of the Supreme Court decision of the same name? Because you know, he spun that into a movie career. Yeah, yeah, he was in club Dread, the movie. And Judge Dread Scott. Dan, what are we doing this podcast, except from a fan people? This is a podcast where we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it. And tonight we watch a movie called Collateral Beauty,

which is a thing that was explained several times in the movie and I still don't know what it's supposed to be. Here's my thinking on it. Collateral beauty is the beauty around other stuff. Wow. All those years of improv really showing off. It's the beauty that's thrust into sharp relief. You finally see it when something bad happens. You become more present and more aware of the beauty in the world because you're raw. Is that what I feel like that's what they want you to think it is? But it was so poorly explained in the movie that well, let's let's talk about the movies about Dan who stars this movie because there's big name stars big stars like Billiam Smith. Yep. Will I am Smith? There's Ed and Ward, Norton.

We're waiting for now. That's great. Yeah, keep going. Kate Winsley. OK, this bit continues to roll. Let's give us some more names. Michael Paine, yeah, who I will say correctly, less die same racist. I mean, it's kind of more racist.

I feel like, yeah. Yeah, you're. And Naomi Harris, another Academy of War nominee. Helen Marin is in it. Helen Miram. Kieran Knightley. Kieran Knightley. KK.

So I guess what people call her. So, KK. This is my great workman and like back on KK. Hey, KK. You're going to make any more Caribbean movies. KK. This guy keeps in a row to me. KK. Hey, KK. What're gonna make any more Caribbean movies. KK. This guy keeps in a room to me.

Hey, KK, whatcha toning for? A ton man, KK. What else was cute? Why do you keep walking away, KK? Hey, KK. I'm so sorry. I thought you were here nightly. You're doing a great job as the face of Chanel.

Baffo work, KK. And King Kong is like, me? No, not you. Oh, see, Pachels. For a moment, Kong thought that he was the bassist Chanel. He is fond of the ball. What a long, beautiful. My beautiful punum.

He's Jewish. A lot of people don't know that. Oh, I mean, that explains a lot of the story. Yeah, he's just like Larry King and Alan King. So this is a movie about a very sad way it will will will will Smith big willing style Smith. Dan, I want you to do the summary this time because I love the way you're going and I want more of it. Look, the wherever this crazy taxi takes me, I want to get out and I'll pay $100 extra in tip.

He's so sad that his kid died that he plays with dominoes all day. Tell me more, where does he work? He works at an advertising agency. How long into the movie did it take us to figure out that's where he worked? 34 minutes, maybe at least. Now who does he share this ad agency ownership with? Edward Norton of TV's The Honeymooners.

Stay Winslet and Michael Pantanian. Of TV's Titanic and Michael Pantanian of the movie's chips. Mm-hmm, yeah. And so. And now they're worried about him, right? Because he's so grievey boy. Yeah, he's not able to do basic things in his life.

I mean, he comes into work every day, but as he does it, he has to play the full set up, the aforementioned fancy dominoes things to knock down. And he can't seem to work up the energy and even pay for his rant at which Kate Winslet discovers when she comes to visit him. Now, we know that he was not always this way because we see in the first scene he's like a charismatic boss. He's given like a funny motivating speech and Dan what does he emphasize and highlight as the three things that drive all human action? He says, he really goes, he says first you get the money, then you get the power. And then of course, you get the women.

The women. Now, it may be, they're like you plagiarize that, dude, but you're such a great boss. We'll roll with it. And he's like, and that's right, highest sales get a cut DVD copy of the women, the remake, starring who's in that? Oh, I fucking don't know. I'd say KK, wasn't it? Yeah, KK.

Hey, were you in this? KK, hey, sign this, sign the DVD. Anyway, he gives a speech in which he identifies the three, he says, what's your why? And he identifies the three, he says, what's your why? And he identifies the three motivators of human action. And they are Stuart. Time. Love.

And death. Kind of a twist ending there. Spooky. And so now he is mad at time, love and death. And his friends slash business partners, Michael Pena, Edward Norton and Kate Wenslet, they, what are they doing? The three of you, Mouse Cateres, let's call them.

Sure, no reason to. They decide, so they discover. They've already hired a private eye to follow him. Yeah, and they want to, this is some kind of Paul Osternaval. Who, the character, the character who plays the, private eye is like, she's always a nanny in things, right? She seems like a fiercing her with Mrs. Doutfire.

Oh, okay, yeah. Maybe was she Mrs. Doutfire in that movie? You know why they played Mrs. Doutfire's mom. Mrs. Doutfire, where were we other? Call me O'Vira. O'Vira Datt fire. You know why they call it? Why she got that name?

No. Because her house was on fire. Okay. She refused to believe it and died and came back as a sort of nanny spirit. Oh, so it's like an old English like you get named after your profession. Exactly.

You're the person who death's fires are happening. Yeah. How that person was supported in the like village economy, who knows? She was one of those holy fools who was taken care of by charitable works. Other as it's also known, the GOP health plan. Oh!

Oh wow. Topical. Dan, so they hired this private eye and what is she discover? Well, the reason they hire this private eye. She's watching him, watching him, watching him. There's a chance for them to sell the company and all make mochotalores. And so.

Lots of delores. You also get the feeling like the company is failing without a firm hand at the tiller. Apparently, it takes the three of them to equal one pinky finger of Will Smith. He's the Don Draper of this movie in that he is one in advertising genius, two, ruining his business partners business,

and three very depressed and unwilling to drive. I'm driven by his whim spaces. His whims and his loss in equal measure. And Will Smith owns the controlling interest in the company. So they need to prove that he is mentally unstable to rest control of the company from him and sell it so that it can stay in business. Yeah. And which is not such a terrible motivation for them, but they come up with the most evil plan to put into effect afterwards. Now, this plan comes about Edward Norton. He decides he takes a shine to an actress who's lined

up to audition for a commercial by the aforementioned for mention KK KK. He doesn't want to come over. Too busy. He's pretending that she can't hear you. She's getting KK's delivery service. Oh, no. No, I Refuse I forgot your anti studio jibbly joke rule on the show. Oh Brother, I'm sorry that I'm a little slow tonight guys. It's okay. I'm very tired. The thing is Dan you and I We got a little bit twisted last night of the night's fun drive. Lead up. It's okay. I'm very tired. The thing is, Dan, you and I, we got a little bit twisted last night of the night's fun drive. Lead up. It's true. And I, at one point in the night, when Dan's waiting for his Uber, I said, Hey, Dan, I'll see you tomorrow because we're

recording. And Dan looks at me and he goes, whoa. It's like bugged out like large March. Yeah. That character depiction of what happened. Now, Dan, does this mean you're revoking your anti studio jibbly joke rule? Because you're so slow and I can still finally do my my neighbor Toblerone one act. It's a whole one act. I've expanded it. All right. Oh, wow.

If you would let me release these jokes one at a time over a hundred episodes, it'd be different. But now I have a 40 minute one act play. All right. I'm now I'm trying to think of other studio j'd be different, but now I have a 40 minute one act play. All right. I'm trying to think of other studio jibbley things, but I actually don't like studio jibbley that much. I can't think of other titles. Wow.

I know. So send all your hate mail to us, everybody in the world. Guess you hate beauty and elegance. Is it about World War II, Dan? He doesn't like it. Go, that was a long time ago. Dan doesn't like the concept of flight. Ha, ha, ha, ha. I didn't like it go that was a long time ago. Dan doesn't like the concept of flight. Hahaha. I can't justify my dislike.

I just know what I feel. There goes my other one, Act Princess Mononokia. It's not only if it was about cell phones. So they come, so he bumps into this actress here nightly and she impresses him with one her attractiveness and two, an idea she has for making their ads slogan better. But then, which male advertising executives love to hear from women? They love younger women, tell them about improve their work. They're very open to ideas from women and very open to ideas from other people.

She then flees and he follows her to a little theater where she is rehearsing a play that frankly, seems to be kind of pretentious with two other actors, how Marin and another actor who's named her. It seems like this is supposed to be an original piece, this play that they're producing, but it's all written in sort of Shakespearean dialects.

So I'm kind of confused by why this modern play is sounds the way this. I mean, it's possible. It's an existing play and we just didn't recognize it. Or maybe it's written that way as like a goof dude. Yeah, a goof dude. Yeah, it's Stuart's new character that he plays after the hustle and hoosier.

Yeah, goof dude. He's like a cool version of Goofy. Put him on fucking t-shirts and give me a million dollars. The Looney Tunes had their time in the sun wear and totally cool, you know, like, wrap clothes on shirts, type of Goofy's slot. Put some wrap around shades on Goofy. I don't know, give him a cigarette to smoke, because he doesn't give a shit.

So, Go dude. So, he finds these three actors and they come up with a plan. So, he walks in and he sees them rehearsing for like a second and he's like, oh my God, that was amazing. And I have seen a lot of theater. And he does say that. Now, oh, here's some things that we didn't mention.

One, what the private I did discover about William Smith is that he has been writing letters to love, time, and death, and just mailing them, which is one, a waste of a stamp. That's $1.50 in postage, he just wasted, because he doesn't even write an address, he just writes love, time, or death, stamps it, puts the mailbox, doesn't put his return address on it.

So some mailman has been wandering the eternal abstract cosmos with a platonic realm trying to find these concepts and he's like, I guess I'll ask the endless if they can show me where to tram. I mean, I'll find death there because destiny could be controlling time. And I don't know about love, Delirium, maybe. And then they bring in bags of mail to the courtroom. They go thousands of letters all for death.

And this chattering skeleton who's been telling people he's death at a department store, we are free to go, Grimy. Yeah, so he's been writing letters to, it's called tragedy on 34th Street. He's been writing letters to these entities and we learn that each of these people also has a thing going on with them. Ed Norton, he's having trouble connecting with his daughter. His daughter is still mad at him for cheating on her mom and causing a divorce and she's like, keeps bringing it up, she's like, can I smell yo dick?

That's an actual song. That's an actual song. You never heard that song before? Yeah, but it was a risk day. I think that was before your time there was a daily show office favorite and we've been listening to it a lot. Okay. Yeah. Why come in home? Five in the morning. Something's going on. Can I smell your dick? And it's because I mean, you you added a syllable to yo, but that's okay. You're pretty close. I'm trying. You're trying to make sure that Dan understands

by ununciating more than the original song. Look, I know there's a cultural barrier but you look here between Dan and all of culture. So, but yeah, that was when we used to listen to a lot. So she, yeah, she's suspicious. Let me explain the song to you. She's suspicious that her husband is cheating on her. And the only way.

She's been hearing stories. Yeah, the only way to figure this out is The aforementioned dick smelling now to sex smell. I've never had any so well according to the song sex and candy It smells and even the scent of candy can't cover it. Oh, no now. What does candy smell like and I don't mean John candy I can pretty much guess what he smells like now, which is a decomposing Yo, what is regular candy sound like sound like yeah, what does it smell like? Well, what kind of candy we talking here? We talking about hard candy A soft candy? I don't know what a soft candy is. I guess like a fruit roll up? Like a marshmallow?

That's a gondis, Ellie. Ellie and Don don't think is actually expecting an answer. He's just trying to hold up a mirror towards society. These are all Zen Coins. I don't expect one. I don't expect an answer. It's a way to learn. And two, and two, and two, and two, and two, and two.

We're my way. Zen Coin is the son of Jewish hippies. Actually, there reminds me of, I've been me, I've been trying to think if this is racist for me to do a Twitter joke about this, there's an ad in the subway. By all means, it might as well work it out. It's not this workshop in here.

It's been from the thousands of people. There's an ad, in the New York subways right now, there are ads for the second Avenue subway line, which just opened up. Why the subway feels the need to advertise another part of the subway is confusing to me. Yeah, it's like drinking a can of coke and at the bottom of that can of coke, there's a like, why not drink coke, stick, and you're like, why don't I drink coke?

Well, it's like there was somebody who had a, I think it was Mark Maron years ago who had an, I mean, there was maybe somebody else who had a joke about why the post office advertises, like there's no other competitors. You're gonna, like, you're gonna, if you just tape panties to an envelope, they're not gonna get there. You have to go to the post office by stamps. This is of course before stamps.com. This was years ago.

But anyway, but it's weird to me, but there's an ad that shows, it's all these different people whose businesses and things are now easier to get to because the second avenue Subway Line. And for those that's have New York, this is a subway line that's been talked about. Like a bunch of fucking grandma? Many decades.

Well, you get kind of, yeah. And there is like Sloan Kettering. And one of the ads is a Zen Master from a Zen Temple, Zen Boost Temple. And the quote is something like the opening of the subway is really ends a lot of anxieties we had about the opening of the subway. And it's like, dude, if you're really anxious about when the subways get open, maybe you're not the Zen Master, I should be going to. You need a physician, he'll thyself, buddy.

Whoa, you took him down a couple of notches. I don't know. Is that the racist thing? Yeah, I don't know if that's culturally insensitive or not. I don't think so, dude. Stuart, you're a Zen Master. Yeah, man. What are we talking about? Anyway, let's go back to the movie,

shall we? Collateral beauty. So he's so he's been writing letters to love death and time and each of his partners have an issue that's related to the same. Ed Norden is having trouble rewinding back the love of his daughter. Yep. Kate Winslet is worried she's told a baby she's running out of time and Michael Pena has cancer that he hasn't told anyone else about. He's dying. About 20 minutes into the movie, he lets out a cough and we're like, that dude's dying. It's like anytime a woman gets sick in a movie or TV show and you're like, I guess she's pregnant, what you're going to do with that baby. I mean, they all had like the most obvious

scenes setting up what their wants and desires were. Like they might as well have had signs on them during the scenes being like, this is my goal, this is my screenwriter's goal where like the first one where Ed Norton is talking to his daughter outside the downstairs, that is inside. Yeah, sorry.

I believe probably the scriptlets at Interior high rise lobby, sorry. I believe probably this completes an interior high-rise lobby, day. And she doesn't want to come with him over Christmas and they have a big conversation about that, very clear what he wants. Then we have a scene out of nowhere where Kate Winslet is looking at artificial insemination on her computer.

On her work computer. And in office, in the middle of the floor that has glass walls, everyone in the office knows that she wants it, that she needs a baby in her tummy. Yeah, she needs a baby in her tummy. It's like that, it's like guys that'll go to the library and look at porn and you're like, really?

I'd say they're not exactly the same situation. One of them is a little bit more accepted. Pictures of babies are porn to some people. Yeah, horrible people, like monsters. Yeah, you're right. That was insensitive. And then there's the aforementioned obvious cough, which as Stuart said, is just secondary to someone throwing up in a movie indicating that they're pregnant

as the most obvious signifier in a film. It reminds me of the one of the most horrifying things I've ever seen a movie in what about 10 minutes into Synecdiki, New York when Philip Seymour often is peeing into a sink or something and it be peas out blood and you're like this is the worst thing I've ever seen. Well, you don't ever be out blood. What a horror movie. Somebody who's that blood come out in their pee.

It's nice. What were you passing stones? I was passing stone. Oh, okay. Was this the second time you were like a tech news passing a DVD of a family's. No, no, no. A werewolf got into my penis and was just ripping it up. Like an inner space?

Yeah. So I don't know why the government shrunk a werewolf, put him in a capsule and then injected him into my body. It didn't help me. So what time do you do it just to see what happens? You know, it was like it was like one of them experiments the C.A. polls where they're just pouring radiation into a town's water supply. I mean, there's two types of science, Elliot.

There's science with a goal and there's science just to explore the universe. I thought you were going to say there's normal science and there's weird science. This is very much of the weird variety. That's true. Yeah, it was performed by guys with bras on their heads. Okay. Now, did they ever get to do it? I feel like if we were going to do a remake of weird weird so that'd be crazy of interspace

You could I'm not so excited you would certainly be the lead in the in the Martin short role. I'm of course You know what's his name Dennis Quaid? I'd be great. You could be Robert Dan Now and you make me raise a good point if we did do a a remake of Weird Science, you better believe we're not doing the sequence where they go to that, that blues bar. Yeah. That's not it.

And they're, yeah, he talks in jive language. Yeah, but here's the thing. Do you think Wyatt and what was the other guy's name? Andrew, was that it? No. Andrew Wyeth? Andrew Wyeth. Andrew Wyeth.

Andrew Wyeth. Amoseth. Famous painter. Do you ever think that those two guys got to write up their experiment for the Journal of Weird Science? Because they got to peer review that stuff. Someone has to replicate those results. Or else it can't be considered actual. Yeah, that's fair. Actual factual.

Now, okay. Let's get back to the movie. So everyone has their deal. They decide they're going to hire these three actors to portray love death and time and Kind of ambush Will Smith so that they can at first it seems like they're doing it for therapeutic reasons But then it's so that they can just make him look crazy The ultimate plan is to provoke him to such an extent that he Gels at them and then they'll have video of it secretly taped and they'll digitally remove the actors

It looks like Will Smith just losing it in the streets at nobody. Now let's just school lose in it. Reiterate this. Because... Isn't it still loose in it? Because this is the dumbest thing in the world. Let's just reiterate it. So make it clear, make sure the audience gets it. They're hiring three actors again to pretend that they're death, time and love.

To gaslight. To gaslight will smith. Yeah. And they go to a huge amount of unnecessary effort to explain what gaslighting is. Oh no, they don't even explain what gaslighting is. She, Helen Mary uses the term gaslight and the other characters don't know what it is.

And I feel like that term has become such a common term, even in political discussions, that like they would just, you know, those guys already liberal blogs all day, they live in New York, they're rich, you know. I reach for the arts and leisure section first of the blogs. I look for the funnies. I want to see. Yeah, I want to see what's the slialock foxes up to. And I go straight to the obituary What's on the one's for dinner tonight?

Wait, am I a group? So they do this and their actors go in confront Will Smith and say very pseudo-profound things But they also help each of the other people deal with their personal problems in stupid suit. Yeah They're all matched up perfectly Meanwhile, oh yeah each one of the people is coaching or is the liaison, I guess, for the actor that is portraying the thing that is their problem. And I almost wish there was a scene where they divided it up deliberately that way

because it's so on the nose that Kate wins. It was like, okay, well, I feel like I'm running out of time. So I'll take time. And Michael Pena, you're dying even though you haven't told us about it. So you take death and clearly have issues with your daughter at Norton's. And they all call each other by their actor, by their real names too.

That's very weird. We got to convince everyone that we'll speak the same. I mean, I think it's about strong choices. So I think that that's a really bold choice to ignore the character names. Exactly. Meanwhile, Will Smith seems to be finding a much healthier outlet for his grief, which is a support group for parents who have lost children. He's been grieving over his, the loss of his daughter, and these other people

are, and there's a great scene where, I mean, great, but a kind of weird scene where this woman gives a long monologue about the death of her son. And when she realized that her young son knew he was not going to survive. And then when she finishes and she's crying, Will Smith walks in and the woman running the support group immediately turns to Will Smith and starts asking him to introduce himself and talk to him. And he doesn't want to talk and he sits down. And then she turns them and he's been crying. It's like, well, thank you for sharing that with us. And it's like, how insensitive was that? Yeah. And what a sign of the double standard of society. This woman is clearly in pain. It's like super intense.

A scene of like the camera like hugging this woman's face as she's crying and telling a terrible story. And then it's immediately undercut by like, oh, forget about you. You're a nobody. Will Smith is a son. The star of hitch just walked in. Hello. The Willenium has begun. Sorry for your lost lady. The exit's over there. Let's talk about men in black three. Yeah, one of the galaxy defenders came in. Come on. He won't let you remember about your dead son. No, let's sit down and tell us all about how your life got flipped turned upside down. If you could take a minute and just sit right there, tell us all about the death of your young daughter. He starts to build a relationship with this. The woman who runs a support group. They see. Play a Academy Award nominee Naomi Harris, who is much

better in the movie she was nominated for any kind of more of work. But she's giving me more to do there. Yeah, she's more and more crack to be addicted to. That's how we have you don't know how much crack you could be addicted to in that so she can be very functional crack addict like in half Nelson I mean he's not the official he can do his day job and I mean he's pretty good looking oh for sure yeah so she they stay it's it's her that gives Will Smith the idea of collateral beauty and it is one of many speeches in the movie that Sounds like it means a lot and I'm sure that a lot to whoever was writing them, but to you the audience it's like

These are just a gospel or threads of smoke and every time I try to grasp on to them and understand what they're meaning It just this so it slips through my fingers. I can't figure it out. It's like a rope made out of sand And when you say the audience you mean like the movie critics who were forced to see the movie and nobody else because nobody would just see this movie According to Wikipedia this movie out did its budget really quite a bit had a budget in the 30s of millions and Made 80s of millions really yeah people love that Ed Norton Yeah, he's probably the biggest star in the movie. He's. People love that Ed Norton. Yeah, he's probably the biggest star in the movie.

He's the big draw is Ed Norton. People are like, I mean, he never really reached the full potential that he showed in primal fear, but I guess I'll keep watching his movies. So the movie continues for a while. I mean, not much more. Not that much happens except everyone has their epiphanies about their lives. And they confront him with the.

Dr. Video. Dr. Video's and he signs away stuff and then at the same time he drops a little bit of info about each of his three partners, various problems. And he shows them, maybe he's so not mentally incompetent that he's identified their problems and tells them what they need to do. But again, he does it in a way that isn't really that concretely helpful for them.

They pay the actors. In case you're wondering, this is the one in the movie where I was dozing off and jerking my head back up to say, as if to say, shit, I have a podcast that I do, I should really be paying attention to this thing. I was jer drinking my phone. So, and so, but we're getting to the two big twists of the movie. Uh-huh. KK, you wanna tell them what the twists are?

KK. She's not paying attention. Apparently KK also stands for Camp Call. If it was super cool. Yeah. But it's not. Cat Collins not cool. unless you are literally calling for a lost cat and you go, you buttons, you buttons come your boy buttons.

I'm glad that you're saying both languages. Maybe the maybe button solely knows a little bit of English, but everyone speaks cat because everybody wants to be a cat, the aristocrats. Anyway, so they, I'm just trying to shake Dan out of his jumper. Sorry. So here are the two twists. Twist, everyone's happy again, kind of. They've come to peace with things. Michael Paine, he tells his wife he's dying.

She knew already everybody did. He was fucking Ralph and all the time. Yeah, yeah. But first twist. Will Smith goes to the home of the head of the support group turns out because she lost daughter to she walks into that he ruins her Christmas Eve by coming to her apartment. And we're like, wow, she's got a really nice place. She's a great house. And it's the sort of thing like I've been thinking about people's apartments and homes on TV

and movies a lot lately. I was watching big little lies, the HBO show, which has a bunch of very nice Monterey homes. And then you finally see the one poor character's house that I was like, wow, that's a nice place. It's a that's a stern rebuke to the quality of housing in Brooklyn, I guess. In real life. Yeah. But he goes to her house and she tells him about she lost her daughter to a rare rain cancer. And then she starts playing, like, I forget, does he play the video?

Or does she play video? He has video videos on, I think. Oh, in her house, of him and a little girl. And she says, tell me about your daughter. His daughter had the same name and died of the same thing. You're thinking, this is the most amazing coincidence. This is bad screenwriting, that their lives are so similar. But it turns out it was his wife all along.

They'd become estranged after the death of their daughter. And he started, he had been haunting this support group because he didn't know how to communicate with her anymore. And the only way they could do it was to pretend that there are strangers. Much as many married couples do, they'll go to a motel or they go to a hotel bar and pretend to be different people. Yeah, they're like excuse me, it's her dead. Do you like peanut colladas and having a dead child?

It really spices up the marriage if you pretend you're in an extreme stage of grief and your strangers that they have just pretended to be strangers and they come back together and they're crying and I have to assume that the sex they had that night was amazing because they're both because it's because it's both the sex of strangers who have found that they have a lot in common and they're kind of, they never fell as before, and the sex of a couple that knows each other's body is extremely well and knows exactly what pleasure buttons to push.

So I guess that's kind of the best sex you can have, right? I don't like hearing about it. I don't like your understanding of sex. It bothers me. I don't like the thing it is a sexual being. It's like you're seeing a doctor on a squirt. I have a child. I know.

You know I had sex at least once. Yeah, but you know, I don't look at your child and think, oh, they fuck to get that. That's not- I do every day. And it's hot. Oh, gross. I mean, it's not hot. Looking at him doesn't is not hot.

I'm not turned on for your child. Yeah, you're not like, oh, your curly hairs remind me of the curly tail of the sperms that shout out of my weenus. I hope the tails are not that curly. Like, the sperms should have pretty straight tails. No, but they use the tail like go real fast. They don't go. Yeah, like a propeller.

Yeah, Dan like what Dan did. They're like little piggies. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, the second twist, twist numero dose. And this maybe this is the reason that Edwin Martin came striking out when he's trying to hit on KK, is the actors have helped everyone their problems. The play they were rehearsing has been called off.

Will Smith and his now reunited wife are walking through Central Park, Smiling. They're reunited and it feels so good. Above them on a bridge, one of the many beautiful bridges that Olmsted and Vox put into Central Park. The first park they ever designed, and yet it's one of the greatest in the world.

It's amazing. I guess it all goes down to their original theories of park design, which were not kind of the English box garden, very, very man-made and artificially manicured. But instead the idea of a more naturalist. This is the art of suspense. That almost always believes that you always wanted to be able to turn a corner and see a new van. Create a desire to hear the end of this sentence.

And so they're on a bridge watching down to the camera, look, cuts over to Will Smith and his wife, cuts back. Cat's eyes. Okay. Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. No, it turns out, and they've disappeared. And you're like, wait, what, was that, what, hold on, was it, were they, were they, so was that really a love, time, and death

that took time out of their busy schedules of running of the universe to help the ad agency help their grieving friend to get back together with his wife and you're left to wonder don't they have better things to do yeah I always see a movie like this so I'm just like you always see a movie like always other better movies I always see a movie like this. You always see more of some other better movies. I always see a movie like this and I'm like, Always? Like go watch that movie.

Like the movie always. Yeah. Well, I don't, why don't these magical figures ever intervene in my life? Like apparently that's what they do. They just like, Uh, it's a movie. Okay.

The same reason that you, you've never met Freddy in your dreams. And like, you don't turn on your fucking radio and you're like a person from a frequency or just leave some shit. The same reason that you should stop being scared that you're gonna be invited to the opening

of a dyno park and the dinos are gonna get loose. Oh, yeah. Now, but it seems like if, by the way, you would totally get killed if you got invited to your Asset Park, no offense, dude, but you're not like a little kid or the you know like the hero. You're certainly not knowledgeable about dinosaurs the extent that say that Dr. Alan Grant is. I'm not I don't have the cool factor of a cold loom type. Yeah. I'd be more of like a newman type but like why is his dinosaurs spin ass in my eyes? I like to believe I'm the guy who says, hold on to your butts before a dinosaur kills

me. Spoiler alert for Jurassic Park. Samuel Jackson doesn't make it through the movie. He gets turned into one of the fakes ripped off arms you've ever seen in a movie. Yeah. So Dan, yeah, you wonder, these forces never intervene in your life. Well, maybe you're not rich enough. Yeah.

Because in a lot of movies where destiny or, or an angel intervenes, it's to show a rich person that they should like be with their family more. And poor people don't tend to get that much help from angels in the movies. Or from, from abstract concepts. And you're like talking about people who have no, the only element of reality interceding in these people's lives is, I guess the mortality of their children and person. Which is a pretty big thing. Terrifying, but like there's other than that,

they're just like, you know, wealthy men having people. Yeah, just figure that if like. WMPs. Yeah. If magical like cosmic entities are going to personally interfere, like they're going to intervene in people's lives, then maybe we would, I don't know, hear about this more often. If they've got the time to go around doing this.

Dan, this brings me back to something I've talked about on the podcast that I call the Teen Wolf Hypothesis, which is that, or the Teen Wolf paradox, which is that, that's better not about that. Is your essay sent into Weird Science magazine? Yeah, the Journal of Weird Science not published, that in a world in which a werewolf is playing basketball for a high school basketball team, this news would make it into papers

beyond the local school paper, that an openly werewolf basketball player. Let's disregard the fact that this team got turned around from being one of the worst to one of the best because of one star player. That would attract scouts at the very worst. You think that would attract national attention. Like LeBron was well known in high school, you know, he was already being scouted. Wow, if you would spend time with David Lailie, what's going on?

But tie on top of that, the fact that he is a werewolf. Oh, not just proving one that werewolves are real, which is something that is, we've all agreed to- We've all agreed for years. For years, I mean, we've all agreed to the social fiction that there are no werewolves just to keep society moving. But so this opens up two doors. One, two doors down, you might say.

One, if were wolves are real, what about vampires, what about mummies, what about Gilman, what about ghosts, what about Frankenstein monsters, what about Dibbix, what about banshee's, goolees, critters, munchies, gremlins, and I can't believe gremlins were the last of that list after munchies.

Number two, what, how do Number two, what is it? Okay, something with the amazing morphology that it can grow hair overnight and then I guess shed that hair. And teeth will lengthen and then go back biologically, we don't have an explanation for that. DNA doesn't really cover it. So this werewolf would be the biggest story.

Starry, sorry, Trump being an agent of Russia. You're going on second page, because werewolves are real. Yeah, it's fair. So anyway, you make a good point, Dan. We would have heard about this at some point. So is it like when, when we were watching Crashing Tiger Hinden Dragon together and you're like, why am I never flying around like that? And falling in love. You never answered that question for me Stuart. I know I was totally enraptured by the magic of the movie. How come I never get trapped in a Groundhog Day?

Yeah. I would love to relive the same day over and over until I get it right. I have tickets by the way for the Broadway production of Groundhog Day. I got the free. That is right. Yeah. I've got press tickets.

Whoa. So next next time I'll report back on that, please do. It'll be flop house and you're writing up the review for variety or something. Yeah. So here's the thing about this movie. Uh, it was trying for very meaningful. It fails to that. It's instead very triggly. I have a question, but Stuart, you said, it looked like you want to say something. Yeah, I mean, I think the elephant in the room tonight, guys is a certain little cat burglar, yeah, by the name of seven pounds.

So is it cat burglar? Right, I thought that was a theme for this. I mean, when Batman drops him off at Arkham Asylum, and he fills out the paperwork. He certainly is. They don't, they, well, the choice, the only options they give you on the form are cat burglar, they give you on the form are cat burglar, murderous clown. And that covers that. I know that murderers.

That's that's not really a clown. I mean, he's, he's covered in like scars, right? That's pretty funny. It's pretty funny. Okay, I'll give you that. It's either cat burglar, murderous clown or a alligator man. Yeah, or a alligator man. This is the one dude killer. I mean, the face can be an alligator man. Yeah, it could change into an alligator man. Yeah, we're alligator man. This is the one dude killer.

It makes like face can be an alligator man. Yeah, it could change into an alligator true. And penguin as a sharp nose, he's kind of a alligator. Yeah, I mean, let's just say animal man. Who? Just say animal man, not animal man. Oh, okay.

That's an animal man, buddy Baker, who's a hero, why is he an Arkham? But animal man, yeah, animal people, man, animals, animals. So you get to be a cat burglar, a psychotic murderous clown or a manimal. And they're like, we gotta make more bubbles on this form to fill out.

Well, we'll add other. That's how we can fit poison ivy on there. Yep, that's where a condiment king goes or whatever. Condiment king? Yeah. I mean, there's clock king. No, there's also a condiment guy. There's no way. Yeah, and he's the king

Look, I want listeners to prove me wrong on this. I don't remember a condiment themed Batman villain What is really I've relish is on there. Yeah, he relishes crime He's got a catch up to the other villains He's using mustard Guess I think it was one of those joke He's using mustard gas. I think it was one of those joker villains that was like a one shot thing. I've read about him though. Okay.

I'm not familiar with him. I mean, Batman has a villain who's literally a friend, Trillic, who has done me with a tiny gun. So I, so maybe he has a condom in his theme. A character that Bruce Tim made terrifying. Yeah, that's true. Okay. So, but what I'm trying to say is that the

previous Will Smith movie, Seven Pounds, had a similar like overly saccharine, overly like sentimental tone. Yeah. This was going to be the most important movie you ever saw. What's going on with our boy, Will Smith? Why is Will Smith doing this, guys? with our boy Will Smith. Why is Will Smith doing this guys? Yeah, I mean, we've seen Mr. Smith and... Go to Washington. Yeah, and a number of movies. After Earth, seven pounds, something else. Yeah, name another. Incredible, Mr. Lipit. Here's, I think. He's just like, smother his natural charm recently. And it feels like the sort of movie that would be made by somebody who is,

like kind of out of touch with. What does that mean? Oh, he was actually really good. Yeah, the devil. What does that mean? He was the best thing in it. But like, it feels like the kind of movie made by somebody who does not,

it has lost touch with what people are actually like. Yeah, there's a sense in it of, yeah, famous people trying to connect to emotions that they, like everyday things that they're not really, or not necessarily a part of how they exist anymore. And Will Smith exists in a very strange plane right now where he just thinks, he seems to think and comprehend the universe in a different way than most people. Now I was reading trivia, not to bring the podcast about a movie about...

Not to brag. Not to brag, but I was reading trivia on the internet movie database. And it was talking about how Will Smith was dealing while he was making this movie. He was also dealing with the loss of his father. Which I guess on some level, I understand the idea of using as an artist, he's using this as a way to like work through his personal shit. And I guess that makes sense. I just wish the movie was better. Yeah. Yeah. I don't. Well, we can go into Final Judgement. I'll

say one thing I wanted to say. I can say this part of my Final Judgement actually. So go ahead. Final Judgement. This is a good bad movie, a bad bad bad movie or movie you actually like. I'm going to say it's a bad, bad movie. It's it's placed in a real world context, but the contrivances of it are so crazy that it only would have worked if you had created a heightened reality. I don't feel like what I was going to say is like I don't feel like it's the actors fault for what's going on. I think by and large, they're all doing the best they can with what they're given Mm-hmm. It's just a crazy fucking script that is modeling and filled with stupid tricks. It's not odd enough to work as like

I know and this movie is not for kids. That's the thing. No, Joe It's not odd enough for it to be like I feel like had this been a French movie the like exoticism of Like French cinema might have his name who did omelie did this yeah Mm-hmm or if it was I could see if this is in French Spanish or Italian yeah, it would see it working better Or Japanese the otherness of it would elevate it to a different like it would it would feel divorce enough from, like, everyday reality for it to seem, like a bigger, like, a grand story. There are lines of dialogue in this that, if they, I was reading them in a subtitle, I think would affect me more than hearing

them spoken in English, because I'd be like, people don't talk that way, come on, that doesn't make any sense. But if I was reading them in a subtit. Because I'd be like, people don't talk that way. Come on, that doesn't make any sense. But if I was reading them and it's up to them, I'd be like, I don't know, maybe, I don't know. Here's, I would say this is a bad, bad movie. You know, trying its darnest. Here's my question,

has there ever been a good movie with beauty in the title? I mean, American Beauty was, didn't it win the best picture? What, come on, what does that mean? Okay, you're right. American Beauty, it's not the worst movie in the world. That's true. I feel like that's a movie people have

have tarred more than they need to. It is certain that people audiences have soured on it. Yes, it's one of many movies that one best picture in the audience is dispermed it immediately. Was stealing Beauty any good? Or was it just that they're naked people in it? Just new unit. To be honest, haven't tried to watch it since I was 16

and was not interested in anything else in the business. I mean, number one of the box office right now is Beauty and the Beast. Okay, there you go, Beauty and the Beast. I haven't seen the current version, but surely the Disney version. But the cocktail version is wonderful. The current movie, which famously a movie goer at the Alamo Draft House in New York City asked another movie goer, what's his dick like?

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Famously. There was an article in the New Yorker talking about it. And I guess that like a screenshot of that New Yorker article was going around where like a woman was like, what's his dick like? It was, were they asking Belle? Like, I would anyone know? I mean, I don't know.

I think at that point it's, You got on that. What was that like? It's, I mean, I think at that point it's like a brainstorming session. And she goes home and she just like, what's the dildo and just rug to try to figure out what the sensation was. Is it a bar? Well, I mean, I would hope not.

Yeah, I would hope not too. I think we'd all have that. Okay, so you answer my question, beauty in the beast. All right. I was having trouble thinking of a movie with beauty in the title that was not a movie I cared that did not want to watch. Yeah.

So beautician in the beast doesn't actually be you. So no sponsors this week, but we are unpopular. No, that's because Max Fun Drive just ended. And we wanted to thank everyone who donated to Max Fun Drive this year. Yeah, well, the our show, all the shows on the maximum fun network are almost exclusively listener supported, like predominantly listener support. We have sponsors. They are a patents compared to what we get from our listeners, which is what keeps us going. So I let you know, and underpants, and captain underpants books and keeps us

and those. Thank you. And keeps us financially emotionally supported. Yeah, I mean, that in the end, are general supported through Mac, well, then underwear. Yeah. In many ways. I mean, that's a sponsor thing. But in my hands, because I hold up to

this we're weener and testies. All right. Well, I was going to say something sincere, but now I feel like I can't. In many ways, just as even though the money is often feels necessary to us and is a wonderful supplement to our day-to-day incomes makes it a little easier for us to live and do the podcast, it is in a larger sense for me at least, seeing that money coming in from the pledge drive is such an emotional support because it shows us how much you listeners care about what we're doing and want to support it and want to hear more about it and don't take it for granted and that really means a lot to us.

And so don't think we take you for granted in making those pledges. It really means a lot to us and we're thankful for it. And it was a very fun time. Obviously I had a lot of fun last, last, last night based on my, are you winking at me right now to me or this morning? Did you guys sleep together last night? Well, I think it was on the table together is a strong word. I don't know what I mean, but you both slept in several places. Yeah, that's a less stronger. That's every every night. Dan stormed off and then me and me and Mark Gagley already from we got this just did a just kept drinking and bullshit and about Dan leaving

early. Classic bit. So Dan, did you have something nice to say or do we just want to razz on you for leaving early? Yeah I was even there and I'm still gonna razz on Dan for leaving early. Dan's LA had stayed up till four in the morning And he wasn't even at the party He just wanted to stay up to show. He could do it cuz he's a big boy Who's gonna tell me no nobody that's who I can eat cereal whenever I want I'm gonna have pizza for breakfast Get out of here and I can't do for I want. I'm gonna have pizza for breakfast. Get out of here. And I don't care for kids with a hand. I don't know. Yeah, I didn't say that.

Dan, explain yourself. No, I agree with everything that was said before. It's a great support. We get a lot of support in the way of messages from listeners, which are also well appreciated telling us how much they love the show, how much it means to them, how it's helped them through a hard time. But money too. But money is, money, money, money makes the world go around.

So thank you for that. And the money goes also toward the Max Fund Network. The Max Fund Network has been a wonderful experience. It's been a great community for us to be a part of and it feels like we reached another level of podcasting. I don't know. It's confidence and quality, considering the other shows. Not so much this one, but considering the shows that we are brethren to now.

So thank you very much for pledging. If you didn't pledge this year, then next year is coming around. And by the time you're listening, there's a chance that I will, my fate will be sealed, that I will be boxed up and sent off to the Grand Canyon to ride a burrow out into the middle of nowhere to what I have heard is one of the most beautiful places in the United States to record a special podcast. And one last note on this, I will win this, gets released, the Max Fund drive will be officially over,

but it'll be over by a day. I'm pretty sure that if you decided to get in, a striglerlers might get out. A last donation or two, you probably will be counted as part of the Max Fun drive. I would imagine. So try it.

Yeah, try it as an experiment. Yeah. See what happens. So if we've finished thanking listeners and asked them to continue donating, I have a correction I'd like to make. All right. And I'd like to make. All right. And I'd like to, can we go to the back of the beginning of the episode and apologize that we made jokes about a movie that the main point is a guy getting over the loss of

a child? I feel like we should throw that out in front. It didn't really happen. It's a movie. I guess that's right. I mean, I speaking as a father, which I can do because I have a child, it is. It's just so wonderful. It's just such a wonderful thing.

You seem really fulfilled for having sex that one time. That's all I needed. It is the thing I fear the most. And it is something that it's one of those things where it's such a horrifying thought that you find your mind drawn to it in a way in the way that something really terrible that you don't want to think about attracts your thinking and then you worry that by thinking about it you're making it more likely to happen. And even having that be a fear I live with every day watching this movie I was still like

come on movie. And like I'm not not gonna name specific movies, but a couple of the Academy Award nominees for Best Picture this year that I thought were pretty good, were deal at movies that dealt with the loss of a child on various stages, and it only sets this movie in stark relief about how bad it is. Yeah.

I mean, if you're gonna watch a movie about loss of a child, this is not the one to do. There's a couple of movies in this year, or just go watch the sweet here after. How about that? That's a movie that kind of gets at similar things in a way, in a much deeper way. But, okay, I should save that for recommendations. I want to make a correction, which was something I said a couple episodes ago. I referred to an unpublished Marvel story of mine something I said a couple episodes ago. I referred to an unpublished Marvel story of mine called Old Man Spider-Ham.

And I erroneously misremembered the name of the artist, who drew the book, it was not Scottie Young as I said, is Eric Canny, who was drawing in a very Scottie Young style. Okay, because when he said Scottie Young, my eyeballs popped out of my head and I had to stuff them back into my head. But no, if Scottie Young had drawn it, they probably would have, they probably would have published it because he's what's the name of the artist again?

Eric Canney. There's also a really good artist. He's really great. And he has a couple books out now. Great. And maybe someday Marvel see fit to print up that story. Now that Spider-Ham is more relevant than ever. Yeah. I don't know the heels of Deadpool 2 going to production.

I would love it if they worked it out somehow for Spider-Ham to appear in Deadpool 2. That would be amazing. Who would do the voice of Spider-Ham? Because of course he's a CGI character. Yeah, oh no. Yeah, you can't just hire an actual pigman to do it. No, they're uncommon. Yeah, they're difficult to find. And the find one that also has the acting shops unlikely. Yes. So who's going to do the voice of Spider-Ham Dan? The late Gary Marshall. Late at that, okay. Well, they're going to do it Peter Cushing style. Okay. I mean, it's on me. I mean, you don't easy to get a character. You don't need to do a recreation of Gary Marshall for a character that is a pig man, which Gary Marshall was not one of.

It leads me to believe you were not listening to what we were saying. That's a good question because it should not be too cartoony of voice. It's not like a rocket. It's not a rocket raccoon type character because he's Peter Parker. He's a mild-mannered pig who becomes spider-hands. Exactly. But it should be a little cartoony. Uh-huh. So I'm going to say, I don't know. Now, when you guys were watching Flatteral Beauty

and Night and they kept calling Will Smith's character Howard, were you ever thinking, you see Howard the Duck? I was not thinking that. And Dan's checking the Fllap House recommends Wiki, so he'll answer later. So who would do the voice of Spider-Ham? I'm gonna say, grown up Jonathan Lipnicki.

Wow, I mean, you know, I think he's back to get, he's ready to get back in the spotlight. He's super buff these days, and I don't know what he sounds like, so it's a wild car. Oh, wow, I like it. Casting unheard.

Let's, let's move on to letters from listeners. Okay. Let's move on to letters. L-E-T. Let's L-E-T. Letters. There are two words that both have L-E-T in them and what does that stand for? L, strength of a lion, e, memory of an elephant, tea. Strength of a termite, proportion at least, or stronger than a lion.

Combine those two strengths and it's pretty strong. An elephant's memory, I've heard is very strong. Let's do the other letters. T. Greatness of a tiger, Tony specifically. E. Richness of an emir. Rural's all country. You see and aren't stands of course for Roy Rogers, Roy Rogers, Fried Chicken Chain, roast beef sandwiches, heart to find unless you're on a highway in New Jersey, letters, the S stands for you Stewart. Can I lick yo stamp? So this one is from Graham last name with held. Who ran in the Northon Graham cracker.

Can you think of any films with a version you watched made a substantial difference to how much you enjoyed it? Speaking for my own experience and opinions, I could not understand the universal popularity of Blade Runner from the earlier cuts, which I felt lacks coherency, but I enjoyed the final cut far more, despite being almost the same film. Having grown up in the longer, T1000 edition of Terminator 2 made watching the theatrical version somewhat jarring, as scenes I thought were integral to the plot were absent altogether. The critically maligned Daredevil films actually somewhat watchful in this R-rated form, and most obscurely, the original Japanese version of the adventures of Milo and Otis only shares

about 60% of its footage with the later English version. They show a lot more of these stunt dogs being killed. If you watch it, you'll see why 40% was changed for Western audiences. It's mostly because... It's all tea ceremony. So what movie do you... It's mostly them bowing to each other in ever more elaborate ways to show respect. You must not receive a gift three times in a row Otis before eventually accepting it.

So what movies would you recommend one version of? Why would I have to make a pilgrimage to a specific shrine? What? Oh, what movies would you recommend one version of, but not the other? And what about Stuart? What was a like rewatching Castle Freak and not seeing a scene you remembered so vividly? Love your show, keep on flopping. Does the imaginary version count as a version of that movie? First off, I don't know.

I mean, the version I saw must have been a little different than the version I saw originally. But I want to go back to Blade Runner. I'm going to tell you right now. What's the time to talk about that too? Right now, I'm going to tell you why the original version was popular, and also your later version is popular, because people don't give a shit about the narrative

coherence of a movie that I don't actually think is very coherent at all. I don't think it shit about the narrative coherence of a movie that I don't actually think is very coherent at all. It's I don't think it's a particularly great movie. The reason why people like it and the reason why I will still say it's all right is because it's a beautiful It's a beautiful movie that has a great score like here's what I'm gonna say and this is gonna be controversial Blade Runner is you're gonna ruffle a few feathers I'm gonna ruffle a lot of feathers get your chickens out of the room unless you want their feathers ruffled the fuck up Checking

Blade Runner is the the hunger of science fiction movies It is a What's the insane? No, it's a stylistic feast where the plot does not really make any sense And that is why I like the original theatrical cut with the plot does not really make any sense. And that is why I like the original theatrical cut with the voiceover on it more than the director's cut. Why? Because at least you have Harrison Ford telling you what the hell is going on in the movie.

Even though it's lead in and it's just describing things. Without that, I grew up with the only the director's cut of the movie. And it was a long time before I saw the theatrical cut. And I read all this stuff about how terrible theatrical cut was, how bad the voiceover was. When I finally saw it, I was like, oh, I know it's happening from scene to scene in this movie now.

Now, I know it was studio with this voiceover on it, but it looks beautiful. Yeah. A movie, I'll say, the versions are very different. Growing up with Godzilla, King of the Monsters. And then finally, as an adult, when it was released in theaters briefly, again, the original Gojira, which is a very different movie. One is a

kind of one is a monster movie and the other is about the horror of a city under massive attack by a force it can't stop. And losing Raymond Burr, just kind of looking out of windows and kind of like sleepily talking about what he was seeing. Really improved the movie. It's a very different movie. I remember not to say that I didn't grow up loving God's ill-ekin of the monsters. No one would ever accuse you of that. Okay, good. Thank you. The first time I saw aliens, and I think this is the version that I taped off of television and had for many years. It was the director's just that said sports on it.

I think aliens. I was the director's cut that included a lot of scenes. Is this stuff a better daughter? Yeah, well, the scenes that it had that, all right, first it had a scene that's unnecessary which is the Party at the end you see the columnists on Like what is it? L.U. 486 or something like the no L.U. 486 You see the column columnists

I had a head hopper and well apart and trying to get an interview with this scene amor Rumors going around that this xenomorph might be gay. Let's blow the lid off this thing. The two of you are trying to cover it up. No, the colonists were, you see them? Mr. Mrs. America, all the spaceships at sea. Getting attacked and we don't need to see that. It's good. It's better not to know what happened to the

colonists even though you know what happened to the colonists. It's called aliens. But it's better not to see that. It's good. It's better not to know what happened to the columnist, even though you know what happened to the column. It's called aliens. But it's better not to see that. It's not gonna turn out to be. Oh, they just give up on their dreams of founding a new column. I guess it was climate change. It's better for the movie not to start that way, though. You want to wait on the mystery of what it's an edge you a little bit. But there are two scenes that I think make the movie a lot better and one is the one where she sees the Ripley sees that her daughter has died during the time that she was in hyper sleep

Which adds, you know a little backstory emotional backstory to why she's so attached to nude and to there's a Nudes a borkosha cool old kid. Yeah, yeah She's like an audience surrogate Go on. Firmative. And there's the hunt man game over. Yeah. I'm in the pipe five by five. There's a scene where they set up automated guns to the aliens are coming down the corridors at them. And they set up these automated guns that are slowly going down.

You see the countdown of their ammunition slowly going out and you don't know what's gonna happen. I won't spoil it for people who haven't seen aliens, but it's a very tense scene, and it's one that I miss very much when I see the theatrical version. Yeah, I mean, aliens is a great movie. Yeah.

Yes. So, let's see. The extended versions of Lord of the Rings, obviously, I prefer the extended versions. I think the extended version of Return to the King, and maybe, I feel like that's the only one where it's a toss up between the theatrical or the extended version, but the extended version of Fellowship of the Ring in two towers, I think, are essential. That's the extended version, but the extended version of fellowshiply ring in two towers I think are essential. That's the preferred version. I would say the TV comedy central edit

of coming to America is hilarious, if only for all the swapping of fuck you to forget you. That's hilarious. That's, I was gonna say about the version of Paris Bueller's Day off that we had on tape as a kid was off TV. And there was a lot of, there was a few moments of that. It's like, if you, I'm not saying cameras uptight, but if you took a piece of coal and shoved it in his fist in two weeks, you'd have a diamond.

Of course, it was a long time before I learned that the line was up his ass. And I was, and I was like, wow, come on. He says in his fist his voice sounds totally different. Like, he's in a different room even. I remember in, I remember in college, I, a buddy of mine had a VHS tape of the Peter Jackson movie, Bad Taste, and he's like, oh, you got to watch this. It's from the guy who made Dead Live. And I had seen Dead Live previously, but I had seen the R rated version.

Oh, yeah. And first off, it's like fucking like 64 minutes long. It's super short. And they just edited all the awesome gore out. And I'm like, this movie is dog shit. So that didn't, and then I ended up having to track down and finding the the unrated version, which is amazing. And it's super great.

So, and it is one of my favorite movies of all time. Yeah, definitely only see the unrated version of Dead Alive. That's a good one. Should I move on? Sure. This is from, let me look. Joseph last name withheld. Gordon Levitt.

Oh, wow. Damn, damn, Russers house to flop. Your biggest gas fan again. Hey, Risa and I noticed. Yes, sorry. Risa and I noticed Elliot using yet again, a descriptive term that subjectively,

personally in my head is particularly grating. He described a character's development in the film as their journey. He's also uses odd therapeutic epithet to describe plot as well. Now I find Elliot is cute and cuddly and as wonderful as I find Dan Sturdy and as well extant or as hot as Stoella Deville. But this word is loathsomely overused in general, but particularly as applied to movies.

I only prefer it to be applied to reality shows. This may be realized that there are many such filler words regularly used by critics and reviewers. I would call journey to be a totally apt word, but continue. Some good, some not so good, which I find corny in the sense of being lame. Some of these include visceral, balletic, tactile, and the dread, academic eyes, academicized, sorry, filmic. Are there?

Balletic is definitely when it's referred to Winterrinda violence, something. Because I'm always like, have these guys seen a ballet? But they all do. I saw equilibrium, dude. That's a ballet, right? As all they're really saying is that this violence was well choreographed, but it's not really belletic.

I saw that scene in Boondock Saints where, uh, Willem Dafoe is flipping out of that movie. So I'm what ended and then I've got, uh, got an answer for any of these grayish shorthand words that you just like. The male gaze fetishization. I suspect stuella has a high disdain for hustlers old Peter meter. Joseph last name with hell. That's got the overused a bit.

Hopefully it's really only used by the one guy. I do like any time a movie has any element of synthesizer in the score and or neon in the movie, it's going to get lurid in the reviews somewhere. If there's anything through Venetian blinds, then yeah. Yeah, yeah. Here are the words that in reviews, the term American classic bothers me because just called a classic, you're then saying that this movie says something uniquely true about America, which is rarely the case. I remember

in the ads for Fight Club, they were always quoting Peter Travers as calling it an American classic and that really bothered me. In ads for movies, visionary, we've talked about this of course, and even to comes a visionary guess because they can see. And this is something I was complaining about on the Twitter, not too long ago. Wohfully miscast. I've never seen a movie where someone has, I've seen movies where people are miscast. Never so miscast that I felt woe, which is literally like Edgar Allan Poe level, Melancholy and Sadness. I think they've never seen. Yeah, you haven't been watching a movie and you're like, oh no, a box upon my house for this casting.

George Clooney shouldn't be playing Batman. Oh God, there is no God. I'll guess I'll just live in a decaying manner. I can't worry that my sister was buried alive. I don't know that I have any of these. Honestly, like there are ones that are specific to like certain reviewers. Like I'm a, I, anything Man singer says, I'm like, fuck that. Go back to go back to eating branded fast food menus. He's eating the menus.

I mean, if it gets close enough to his King Kong burger, it'll get eaten. That's a. So Dan, what are some words you don't like? No, I was saying that. I trust honesty. Yeah. Absolutely. Fourth rightness. Affection. Love. Time. Death. Everything in between. If this movie had been made in the 90s, and it was an indie film, it would have been called Love, Time, Death, and everything in between. Or like Love, Time, Death,

and some other great flavors, or some shitty, like, winky title like that. Everything in the 90s had to have shitty, winky titles. Yeah. Love, Time, Death, and a devil bed. Yeah, exactly. Love, Time, Death, and other fun things to do. And other fantastic things.

I'd be in Blockbuster video and I'd be like, this looks good. Mom, can I rent this? I'll try it. I didn't have anything good to say about this. So we should just move on. Cool, let's just move on. Okay, let's get moving on.

I think we're only going to do three letters this night. So this will be our last one. Okay, the third act. The Den you Moll. This one is French for last letter. This one is from Riley Middle name with held Quinn who writes, Hey Flock Kings, when I was 80% asleep, I muttered something to my girlfriend and asked her to take it down so I could send it into you guys as a letter. How lazy. Why do you yourself? He's dating her from the movie. Okay.

Here follows her note. Either help me make sense of it or let me resign myself to worshiping my author. I. Narlith O'Tech. The crawling chaos. Is it creeping chaos or crawling chaos? Crawling chaos. Crawling chaos. Is a creeping chaos or calling gas crawling gas crawling chaos So although I don't know why to worship him. He's really more of a servant of the other gods. She sent a Or he sent he said girlfriend right?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa option. Just say they. All right, it's acceptable now. Riley is just a ace of spies. What did Riley say? Okay. The. That's what did Riley say. Riley sent a nice screenshot of it. It shouldn't make it harder to reach. I don't know why you're showing the jelly and like, look at this. Exhibit A. The printed out. I got proof. proof alleged of this ad evidence as exhibit a Riley rights Bob house letter if you had said Riley tells us one more time I think it would have left KK come with you KK, I'm coming with you.

KK, yeah, I'll come with you. Love House Letter, Dash. Houses of Parliament, Dash. Commons and Lords, Dash. And the Slops B. Snobb's film with a cool teen made PM. Sue will convention. Speakers, Dias, skateboard tricks. Challenge the fuck guys that come up with a name. That's a word, Dias, skateboard tricks. Challenge the

flock guys to come up with a name. It's a word, Dias. Yeah, like we're acting on a day of no. So continue. Riley says challenge the flock guys to come up with a name. That was yet. Oh, so it's okay. So it's a slabs versus nobs comedy where I guess the House of Commons and the House of Lords are in a fight. And they and a cool teen made PM, apparently.

Yeah, it's in sense. Okay, and there's a skateboard trick. Speaker's day has skateboard tricks. Okay. Suol convention. Is that Rufus Suol? I can only, he's got to be the bad guy. I mean, you sure, maybe it's a misspelling

of Zool convention, and there's a, like a Ghostbusters angle to it. Or are you saying that? Hello misspelling. I mean, look, I have. They sound alike, but they're not spelled like a lot. I had enough times when I've typed a word into my phone and it's thought it was some other

kaka-mami word I didn't want. Like kaka-mami. Yeah, type in kaka-mami and it thinks I want kaka-mami Eisenhower. This is not my maybe Eisenhower erotic fanfiction. Well, that's a lot of pressure to come up with a good name on the spot, but that's pressure that we can handle because we're professionals.

I think I'd call it London thrashing. Oh, cool. So get the skateboard angle in there. I would say houses and lords and everything else. And Dan, what would you go? Keep in mind, I'm now taking, bringing down the houses off the table. Extra hierarchy in the UK.

Okay, interesting. More than the regular size. When you need a little bit more energy, that's the one you get from behind the counter. Yeah. Extra strength, and the UK. Okay, so we did like a B plus job on this assignment.

That's generous. I'm giving us an A for trying. Oh, wow. But yeah, if you have any notes that you've written yourself or had dictated at late at night and don't understand anymore, please send them to us. Then it does. We'll come up with a title for them, I guess. But now we move on to our final segment of the evening

or whenever you're listening to this podcast. And that is recommendations, movies that we like instead of collateral beauty, which I keep wanting to call collateral damage because that's a phrase and collateral beauty is not. Okay, Dan coming out strongly against the phrase collateral beauty. All right. I hope you guys have a nice episode.

Long and then the future. And realize that like far into the future where collateral beauty is like a thing that everybody says. Yeah, yeah. And we'll seem totally, totally divorced from. Yeah, exactly. Like that G.I.J. Joe retaliation episode where I was like there's no way the American people elect a man with silly hair like John of

them price and then people keep tweeting me about it and every time I'm like oh I feel bad about saying that thing and I feel worse about the current state of our country. I mean yeah it's like that is to say before it happened that America would never elect like a bad person president. I think is to or super villain. I think it's totally okay to be like, you know what? I was wrong. I'm not going to feel bad about it.

Like you guys are idiots because you didn't think the American people would hire a elect co-worker commander to be the commander in chief uh... i'm a commander experience that's true that's very hard to get to but that's a thing that's why they wouldn't elect him is because there's a suspicious of somebody with previous experience and being a commander like they want an outside his establishment let's just say co-worker manner is establishment and they want an outsider like globulus. This is like globulus.

I couldn't even say it with a straight face. The president globulus, which is kind of what we have, but anyway. That's where I got that name. So I was sitting here, you know, we've done what we do now, Dan, for like, like, said already recommendations. We've done this what do we do now, Dan? Like, said already recommendations. We've done this for nearly 10 years, this podcast. When's our anniversary? When's our 10th anniversary?

Keep it running. I wasn't here for the originals. Well, me and Dan are anniversaries in August. I don't know. When did we do, I know who killed me. That was your first year. That would have been, I don't know, that was episode eight. So, I mean, you can check iTunes.

I think it tells you when it came out. So, we'll have to figure out if we want to do a 10th anniversary, we'll just do both. 10th anniversary of the show, and then a mini 10th anniversary for when the original peaches came together, ironically, not as the original members of the show. Yeah.

Maybe people could probably actually are explaining the joke for me. Just write in, explain, and with suggestions about how to celebrate 10 years in the flop house, which seems crazy now that I've just said that. Yeah, God. But I say that just to say that we've been doing recommendations that entire time. There were a fixture of the show from the very beginning and I still

forgot that I was supposed to come up with a movie until halfway through the podcast tonight. I thought you were gonna say that you that you you had why you're so quiet, Dan, I thought, because you were half asleep. I thought you were going to say that you had you're like, we've done through a lot of movies. So it's hard to think of another one. And I was going to make fun of you. Like, yeah, there's only been 240 movies in the history of filmmaking.

But no, that makes sense. You, it's actually, I should make fun of you for forgetting the thing we do every episode for 10 years. But it just makes me worry about you a little bit. You didn't cough at all tonight, did you? I have been coughing a little bit. Pregnant. One thing I will say is doing this, doing the recommendation section of the podcast, at this point, it genuinely puts pressure on me to watch movies that aren't just the movie we watch for the flop. Yeah, for sure.

Well, that's what I was, I haven't seen a new movie since we were all last together, certainly. So like, part of me was just like, what if I just recommended a book and I'm like, no, that's cheating. We will make fun of you forever. But is it a book about movies at least? No, it's not a book about movies, but it led me to a movie.

Not. It missed a movie. It led me to a movie. Okay. Because I read the Yiddish policeman's union recently. Are you going to recommend Orson Welles Heart of Darkness, which is mentioned in the book, that movie does not exist? No.

And it's the one thing I want to ask Michael Chebon, anyone listening, if you have the chance to ask Michael Chebon a question, I want you to ask him for me. In the alternate universe where the Jews of Europe were resettled in Alaska, how did it also change whether Orson Wells made a movie of Harder Darkness or not? I mean, he follows Hodgman on Instagram, so there's a decent chance Hodgman could ask him. John Hodgman, if you're listening. He's not. Well, somebody tell Hodgeman this because he's not speaking to me right now. That's not true. Maybe I'll ask him. But it's always been like, it's just an interesting kind of the other difference of this alternate universe because he was going to make a movie of hard darkness. Yeah. But it was going to be too expensive. So. So you

read the English place. No, I enjoyed it very much, but that led me to think. A police academy for? I should recommend Michael Shaibon movie, which is Wonder Boys. Wonder Boys has been. About wonderful boys. That I enjoy very much. It was not particularly lauded at its time of release. I mean, the critics liked it, okay. But critics liked it, okay, but no one went and saw it.

And that's because it's like. The movie about a college professor and a creative writing student who are having issues, they helped each other out with that, it didn't, was the huge hit. That didn't rock the box office for 19, whenever. It's sort of a melancholy comedy, but it's very funny

In spite of having this kind of also known as every comedy on cable or Amazon. All right. Well apparently L.A. It's not a fan of Wonder Boys. Oh, no, it's fine. Just this new wave of melancholy comedies Sorry, I shouldn't interrupt so much. No, I don't have a whole lot to say other than it's a movie about a Michael Douglas plays a college professor who's been trying to write a book for years and years and years and his protege in the movie. Fuck what's who tell me what's where Peter Parker. Yeah,, see this kid. He is a very talented writer and Michael Douglas realizes this. And Jesus, it's a complex plot. Honestly, now that I'm thinking about it, it's almost like a screwball plot slowed down is what Roger Ebert said about it.

I think that's very accurate. So I'm not going to try and get into all of the ins and outs of it. It's just a beautifully shot film. There's just gorgeous stuff in it. And I forget which, I think it's in Pittsburgh, that it's set and they managed to make this run down factory town look magical. And again, it's got a great cast, it's got Frances McDormand in it too. And she's great along with Michael Douglas,

probably putting in his best performance, I think. So I recommend Wonder Boys. If you like the works of Michael Shivan, you should watch this film, which captures it pretty well, even though in the book, the professor is decidedly Jewish and not Michael Douglas. I mean, Michael Douglas has Jewish.

Is he? His correct Douglas is son, correct Douglas is Jewish. All right. Well, he doesn't come off as Jewish. And anything he does. Anything he does. What about Wall Street? He might be Jewish.

I don't know who his mother is. Oh my god I just remembered the movie watch tonight is like a sad version of the game That's hilarious And I'm gonna look up and see if Michael Douglas. So while Dan's well Dan well while Ellie it's doing that I'm gonna recommend a handful of movies, I guess. So, whole handful. So, yeah, only his father's Jewish. Dan had mentioned an episode or two ago that he had seen get out and I finally saw it.

And I think it's great. You should totally go see it. It may just be a successful horror movie, like a schlocky horror movie, but at the same time, I think the political message, it's putting out there is well thought out and deepens the horror movieness of it and it's a movie where as things are revealed, it actually becomes a more interesting movie as opposed to being demystified

and less interesting, which is often the case with that kind of movie. Get out. It's just a great strong first feature for a director. So Boo on Dan for not recommending it. You're saying get out and see get out. Get out and see get out. Before Dan can respond, I'm going to keep going. I'm also going to recommend last time when we were doing the show,

John Hodgman was playing me off the stage, and I didn't get to bring up the fact that the movie I was recommending Manborg, which is great, has at the end a trailer for a fake movie called BioCop, which is amazing, and that's available on YouTube. So if you have any time at all, go on to YouTube and watch a five minute trailer for a movie that doesn't exist called BioCop, you'll feel better about yourself.

Go do that. I don't want to talk too much about it because I don't want to ruin it to go see that. And then I'm going to recommend the movie. I'm actually going to recommend. Although actually, no, you know what? I'm just going to say get out is my recommendation. It's awesome.

Wow. You should go see that. It's got a lot of great performances. Yeah. Go save that other one for another time. Yeah, I just need it. Let me just open up my whole pouch and put it back in there. Yeah.

Movie pouch. Mm hmm. The opening is like a movie pouch. Get back into the movie. What do you say now? I know that sounds like it Turner Classic movie show, Stuart Wellington's movie pouch. Wouldn't that be great if I was able to trump Eliot's bid

to be a Turner Classic movie host with Stuart's movie pouch? Movie sack. I got a sack full of movies. My request is very simple. Just put me on like do a little thing on shutter where I introduce fucking movies. I gladly do that. That'd be great.

Here's, okay, anyone who's listening to this, if you work at Turner Classic movies, you know who somebody who walks to work at Turner Classic movies, I would, one of my career goals is to be a Turner Classic movies movie host. Hook me up with it. It's something that I think I'd be great at.

I'm pretty sure I can do. Thank you, let's try and as you say. And I would do it in me up with it. It's something that I think I'm pretty sure I can do. Thank you, that's right I should say. And I would do it in a very respectable way. I'm not looking to slag any movies on there. I really like to do it. I'm more than willing to share an apartment with Baymanquits if that's how it works. Cause I assume he's sharing an apartment with Robert Osborne

and that's where they shoot all the intros in that apartment. I feel like if, like, I think I'm pretty likely to get offered that gig, Elliot, and you know, I'm just upfront, I'm going to say you'd be better at it for me. Like, I'm really charming and I'm really funny and everything, but I think you'd be better at the mix of just offer to Elliot instead. I mean, Stuart's more handsome than me, so they're probably going to give it to Stuart. Yeah, that's true.

I'm tall, too. And tall, isn't it kind of like a bad boy image? Uh-huh, and, you know, I can dance when I have to. Usually doesn't enter it to it. But maybe if I had to, if you had it like if someone had to put a gun to your head, yeah, yeah. There's the only way to save a, a bus full of people that's falling off a cliff if you dicks. Like, okay, I'm going to give you a hypothetical. We're on a planet.

And Ronan the accuser pops out and he's got one of them in fin of these stones and you're like dude I Dance and win the day Okay, I'm kind of confused about how you're dancing wins the day likes the the dance contest You haven't seen Guardians of the Galaxy. That's what basically happens I mean, I would remember from a guardian the galaxy is the unnecessary amount of swear words It was not necessarily called Ronin the accus Acues Ray bitch. You were really mad because Daniel had her hands over your seat and have to hear those swear words. So I want to hear the bad words. I am disappointed that Ronan the Acues

Roo has become a kind of complex character in the comics was made just to the regular Marvel movie, two-dimensional bad. I thought he was much more interesting than that, but that's my- Mostly, I think Lee Pasedewa, he could- I love the idea that movie, the most of it seems like a happy, go lucky goofy space movie. And then all the scenes on Run and the Accuser's Ship

is like super like grim and gross. Like it seems like it's part of a completely different movie and I love that about it. That's fair. Well, see what happens with the second one since I'm hoping, well, we'll talk about it later. The storyline they're doing the second one as I hope one from the comics they like.

Anywho, I'm gonna recommend a movie that I feel like was kind of trying to do the thing that this movie was trying to do and achieved it much more. And it's a movie from 1986 called Promise with James Garner and James Woods, which was technically a home or call of fame TV movie. Wow. But it's available on...

This is a real first for Elliot. But it's available, I mean, I saw it on Turner Classic movies. It's available, I think, on DVD. And it is about James Garner is a man who is in middle age but doesn't want to, he doesn't live like he's in middle age. He lives like a much younger man. And his brother, played by James Woods,

is a paranoid schizophrenic. And their mother passes away, and he had promised his mother years ago, I'll take care of my brother if anything should happen to you. And he's finding it now very hard to live up to that promise. In a way, he didn't realize it would be because he never really thought about it before. And for the most part, it's a pretty understated movie. There's of course

a scene where James Woods flips out completely, which is a little over the top, but just he's sticking anything in his fucking tummy. No, he's not. He doesn't be, he doesn't be enter the new flesh. But it's a movie about two brothers who really have nothing in common and have trouble living with each other in a way that they can never really overcome and the best that they can do is kind of come to an understanding about each other in a way that they love each other, but they can't fix each other. And I found that there was a, especially for a hallmark TV movie, oh, this was at the time when they were putting out really, really quality TV movies that for that it really Got to that point in an honest way in a way that something like collateral beauty did not do and the score in it

Is done by David Shire who did the score for my favorite movie taking a Pellum 1 2 3 and it is light years different from the score for that movie for the score of Taking Pellemone 2-3, and it is light years different from the score for that movie. For the score of Take a Palemone 2-3 or collateral beauty. The Take a Palemone 2-3. Because collateral beauty sounds like it was scored by like Atticus Ross's nephew. There's a surprise about a beep and boops in the soundtrack of it, not in collateral beauty, I mean. So promise, I would recommend as just a solidly made family drama type movie that I liked. All right, guys. A bunch of recommendations. as just a solidly made family drama time movie that I liked.

All right, guys, a bunch of recommendations. Yep, that's an accurate summation of what just happened. Now what's the next thing that we're gonna do? The next thing we do is we do prizes or... I'm curious about Stuart doing one of those famous dances of his. I hit stop on the recorder and we all go home to our snug little beds, uh-huh, and we go shuffle off to dreamland. What if I need to shuffle off to Buffalo?

You're free to do that. What if I just want to dream about a Buffalo? For now. Ah, too topical. Yeah. Okay, air America. I'm getting too saucy. We should probably sign off for the flop house.

I've been Dan McCoy. I've been steward the Quaker Quaker. Well, and not actually a Quaker. I was going to ask about that. And friends, who are we really when it looks when we get down to it? There's really only three constants in life. Love, death, just a bunch of meat and bones and time. We're just sacks of flesh with maybe a little bit of spark. And who knows who put it there? Can you put a name on it? Can you really put a name on the thing that makes us, us?

Put a name on it. I guess if I had to put a name on it, for me, I'd say, Kelly, Caleb. Goodnight everybody. Goodnight. and night everybody. Good night. Oh. Let's start the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Show that we do.

All right. It's called a podcast. You see the intro? First, and then we'll do the second part, second. Okay. Love it. The second part is the show. So you decided the show is the second part. Uh, in 321. On this episode.

I don't know why you looked at me like I was about to unleash a tape on you. 321, they looked at like, I did something bad. I'm a naughty little boy. I like counting down. Oh, can you believe me? No, it was usually go the other way. All right. on. Listen or support it.