The Flop House - Ep. #280 - Peppermint

Episode Date: March 23, 2019

It's MAX FUN DRIVE time, everyone! That means we're putting out an extra episode on a week we'd normally take off and drink pina coladas or something. Instead we watched the Jennifer Garner revenge fantasy Peppermint, and hoo boy is it racist! Meanwhile, Elliott reveals his Mandela effect defense attorney strategy, Stuart gets lost in his thoughts, and YOU'RE NOT DAN'S DAD, JESSE. If you like what we do, and you have the means, please consider becoming a Max Fun DONOR! Wikipedia synopsis for Peppermint Movies recommended in this episode: Captain Marvel The Wailing Early Man LIVE SHOW DATES 2019! June 8 – PORTLAND – Revolution Hall July 13 – MINNEAPOLIS – Parkway September 28 – BOSTON – WBUR CitySpace October 12 – LOS ANGELES – The Regent Theater

On this episode we discuss, peppermint, starring in head over heels only on Broadway. Hey everyone and welcome to the flop house, I'm Dan McCoy. Oh hey, I'm Stuart Wellington. And over here it's Elliot Kaelen, a guy who occasionally yons, which Dan McCoy takes to me and hold the phone everybody, the world has to stop. Well, Elliot is yawning. Well, you know what, folks? Sometimes I yon, sometimes people can just keep moving and working on my yawning. What do you think about that?

Well, it's, uh, Elliot's peeling back the shell of this oyster right now. Yeah, like, like, I like all the sticky, uh, goodness that makes the purpose. We're referring to a thing that happened before the podcast started, which was me pausing the podcast to allow him to yawn, which, you know, seems to me to be a reasonable thing for a broadcaster to try and do, but. Nope. No, we got to get this show on the road. Dan, might I remind you that one of the most successful recording artists in adult contemporary

history was Yoni, a man who live at the Acropolis, Yon through his entire act, hence the name. All right, guys, I just suggested that oysters are sticky. Do you think I'm smearing them with an unfair label or? I think considering I've eaten many oysters and I've never had a sticky one. Or maybe I'm just revealing that I'm not a real oyster freak, you know. You also said something about feeling back the shell, which is not really how the shells are oysters work either. You got to pry that thing open.

It's not like a sardine can. You don't have to kind of known for just sort of sliding down the throat. If they're sticky, you would be choking. Okay. Now, oyster, let's just to put it in the most palatable terms. This is the way I described oysters to my son. And oysters kind of like a big piece of snot that you just gop on down. And it's delicious and there's kind of like a briny aftertaste because it's of the sea.

Oh wow. So you're that's you're working on your yelp review for oysters right now. Thumbs up like a big piece of snot. You don't remember that. Thumbs up. That's seen in Indiana Jones in the temple of doom where they eat a monkey's brain. This is like that if it was a sea monkey's brain oysters won't you? Okay. Well, now that we've put our best foot forward, let's ask for money because right now it's the most wonderful time of the max fun year.

Uh, max fun year. Max fun drive. A time when we come to you, hat in hand and say, Hey, hey, I smoke you. But, but, but, please. Yeah. Please make me realize. Because look, this, this, this, this place doesn't run on nothing. That's true. I mean, mostly runs on. Runs on Duncan, right? No, that's, nothing done. Yeah. I think America runs on Duncan. Yeah. And this is an American podcast, correct? I guess you're right. Yeah.

But then we also run on money, as you say. Yeah, Stuart, you have something you want to save up money. Okay. Yeah. So Just first off, we mentioned it's the max fund drive and that's gonna start on Monday and Max and correct. Oh shit. Where this is right gonna start on Monday. And Max, and correct. Oh, shit. Where does it right in the middle of it? Oh, wow, okay. My big mistake, it's already started, Dan just corrected me.

Or perhaps he misled me with earlier information. We'll find out. Perhaps you didn't pay attention the way that you could have. No, that's, that's, that's, that's, guys, I'm loving it. I'm really, really, really, and we can redirect it to Max Fund drive. Now, I'm loving it. It seems very unlikely. We can redirect it to the next one drive.

Now, next one drive is the time of year when we ask you the listener to help support us, the creator, because as Dan said, it takes money to make this show, and it takes money to live a life in this world. We don't yet have the socialist paradise we're all hoping for with the universal basic income and everything.

So let's work together. And by that, I mean, you give us money. You do the part that you should do by giving us money. And by that, I mean, you give us money. You do the part that you should do by giving us money. And we're all all your money. That would be crazy. That would be amazing. We're not going to do that. But to give us the reasonable amount, you think that you can provide to us maybe as a one-time donor, but we love it. You could be a monthly donor. Stuart, tell us more about it, won't you?

Yeah, the, it's important for us because obviously we're all, you know, you're directly supporting us, but also we're all Max Fun supporters ourselves. I think we were all supporters even before we joined the network. And at least for me, I'm a big fan of the way that Max Fun provides a model where you have the option to, obviously, we provide our content remains free, but a big part of it, the reason it's able to remain free is that we have a donor supporting, a listener supported model where you're able to provide, you're able to support the things that you like with money. I guess I did this very poorly.

But and I went all over the place. Dan, back me up on what? What's the, what are we talking about now? Which part of the ask is this? Okay. So Dan, would you say that supporting Max Fun shows like you do like I do like Stewart does, it helps give us a sense of both belonging and ownership in a sense over what we listen to and a place in the max fund community that really feels like solid like we're supporting the people who give us so much to enjoy. Yeah, I mean like look, I'm a listener to these shows as well as being a part of the max fund, quote unquote, family family And I say that because Jesse you're not my real dad and you never will be But he is dating your mom

I'm a little uncomfortable with that since my parents are still together after yeah, but they have an open relationship, right? I'm not so sure but anyway, but there's a chance Yeah, he's leaving a crack. He's cracking that door open. Yeah, I peeled back that shell a little bit. No, the point what was I saying? Oh, I'm a listener. I like all of this. You feel like a part of the Max one.

You know who you are. You feel like a part of the Max one family. I do. And I like, look, here, I've said this in previous drives. I'll say it again. For me, podcasts are one of my primary forms of entertainment these days. I listen to them on the subway going to work.

I listen to them when around the house doing chores. There are frequent times when I'm like, oh, do I want to watch any of these television shows I've recorded on my DVR? You know what? I don't actually. I want to have something vaguely on in the background while I listen to a podcast

because I need two things happening. It wants to distract myself because I'm a modern person who has no attention span. But, you're still hearing off course. The important thing is that I like podcasts. And podcasts are kind of my major source of entertainment these days. And I pay for things like, I don't know, Hulu,

which I barely watch, I have around just in case, like I miss a television show once and I'm like, I wanna go back and check it out. And that's like seven or eight dollars a month that I'm spending. Why not throw that money over to a podcast and said something that engages me directly that I care about, that I have a very strong emotional connection to

Support that that's what I would have to say. Yeah, that's a much better version of what I was trying to say Elliot So it sounds like what you guys are saying is it would be worth it for people to become members of maximum fun and donate It this year's maximum fun drive now Maximum fun has a goal and that goal is 25,000 new and upgrading members. This is not a crazy goal. They have reached huge goals in the past. It's why Stewart did a podcast at the Grand Canyon. Oh, yeah, I did that. That did not. That was pretty crazy. That was incredibly crazy. Yeah. So you have your chance to become a member

just like them or if you're already a member to upgrade your membership. When you upgrade, you get special gifts. We'll talk about those later in the show. Stay tuned to hear what the gifts are. But you could go as little as $5. You go as much as $200. Most people, it seems, go in the 10 to 20 to $35 range per month. And once again, pay what you have. What you can afford to.

We're not asking you to go into Hawk for this. But here's how you do it. You go to maximumfund.org slash donate. And that's a website. I don't mean, it's not like a go to maximumfund.org slash donate and that's a website. I don't mean it's not like a building called maximumfund.org slash donate. Let's go on your web browser and do that. I should have made that clear and I apologize that I didn't and you just Select the membership level that you feel is worth it to you the membership level you can afford again We don't want you to get into trouble and the membership level that you feel best reflects your love of maximum fun I guess guess, you know, as a parent, I try not to peg my love of my children to the money that I give them,

but it's kind of hard not to in the world we live in. You'll give your credit card information and some very basic information like which Max Fun shows you listen to. And that tells Max Fun who to give the money to basically. So don't feel like Max Fun is like trying to spy on your listening habits. It's that they know it. You don't want your money going to some podcast. You don't listen to, you want to go to love how to guess you do listen to, but really, they're all good ones. And then that's it. You just go to that website, maximumfund.org slash donate, choose your membership level, put in your payment information and tell them what shows you listen to, and you're a member. And your membership contribution is ongoing. It'll process automatically every month. You don't have to do anything unless you decide to cancel at some point

or your credit card expires in which case you'll have to put in a new card number. But it's super easy. We've all done it and as you can tell from most of this episode, we're morons and we were able to figure it out. Our circular rambling conversations, you can tell that like if we can get our act together to go to this website, then you can too. Yeah. I mean, your chance, oh, sorry, you didn't say so.

I was just going to describe my brain as a boozed soaked piece of bread at this point. Sounds delicious. Sounds, sounds, sounds delicious. Yeah. I mean, and so you could do it right now. Like, we'll wait for you. I mean, you can also pause the podcast and do it right now. But I find that with this stuff,

I put it on a to-do list, I never get around to it. Better to do it right now while it's in your brain. So, well, you go to maximumfund.org slash donate and become a Max Fund member and we'll give you other chances during this episode. Dan and I and Stewart will talk about something you don't wanna hear about so that you don't feel like you're missing anything.

So, guys, let me tell you about changing a diaper this morning. Okay. Oh boy. And the weird thing was, it was on yourself. Maybe we shouldn't tell this story actually now that we think about it. Well we'll be back with more Max Fundrive later in the episode. Your chance to make a difference in the lives of some lucky maximum fun podcast creator. What do we do next on this podcast, Dan?

Well, the next thing we do on this podcast is the main thing that we do on this podcast, which is a bit, in which part, unless you're a vegan, in which case, you don't like me referring to the main thing as meat. So let's call it the cauliflower steak. Yeah, let's call it the chickpea of the cup, the vegetables of the podcast. Yeah, in England, they would call it flower steak. Yeah, it's called the chickpea of the cup, the vegetables of the podcast.

Yeah, in England, they would call it the mains. No, that's good. With an S at the end of the podcast. The entree. Okay, cool. It's getting spread. It's getting spread. No, I love it.

We watch a bad movie and then we talk about it. And this time around, we watched the Jennifer Garner Revenge movie, Peppermint. Peppermint. And then we talk about it. And this time around we watched the Jennifer Garner revenge movie. Pepper mint. Pepper mint. Yeah. And let's just get into that guys. Based on my earlier performance, you're probably quaking when I say, I'm going to take the wheel.

Yeah. Well, you're on this train. You're trapped with me, the conductor Stuart Wellington. Pepper mint. We open with... That's Stuart Wellington summarizing joint. We open on multiple production logos, including a couple that I do not recognize at all. We open on... This is going to be very detail. Less of us.

Yeah, yeah. We open on a nighttime scene over the city of Los Angeles. I'm assuming. And a car is rocking in the parking lot and you're like, oh, is this an R. Yeah, is this an R rated movie? It isn't R rated movie. But we get a little bit of a twist them up

because there is no couple in there, sharing romantic affections. No, no, no. It is very gentle. Very gentle. It is, no, no, no, it is Jennifer Garner stabbing a dude with a knife. And she's like, remember me or something?

And then toss. And what does what does this dude look like? Does he look like a like, is he an accountant? Is he a police officer? Payne is a word picture about this dude. We've seen a lot of dudes like this dude. He looks like a kind of the year like cliche image of a like a Mexican gangster, you know, face tattoos in Old English script, a,

most, I think a plaid shirt that's just buttoned at the top, that sort of thing, right? And probably a band-ass. He's the most local album under his arm. So she stabs his dude and tosses him in the very large trunk of the car she was driving. And then we get, then we get some cool ass credits, right? Yeah, we see the city of Los Angeles in like jerky stop start, fast forward motion, the shutters having

a problem, which is weird, just cameras don't have shutters anymore, but ended up, and it's all tied, it's all wrapped up in a neat bow of some cool ass hard rock intunes and a lot of footage of Homeless people on LA's skid row now. I do want to say one thing earlier that the reason I wanted to emphasize what that tough guy looks like is that The bad guy in this the bad guys in this movie have walked straight out of a like build the wall commercial So get used to when when Stuart says your idea of a Mexican gangster He's not being racist. The movie is being racist. So let's continue. Oh, that'll be a lot about how racist this movie is, but we'll get to it. So yeah, we then get what we get a title card five years later or five

years earlier, not five years later. That would be crazy. We'll be a blast at the hellscape with Robocast battling predators all over the place. We briefly see Jennifer Garry giving herself some old West Frontier first aid, some pioneer medicine in her battle van where she's using duct tape and staples to close her own wounds. Uh huh. Yeah, and she, uh, yeah, she just walks through this and like this tent city, this skid row as they refer to it later, uh, feels a little bit like, I don't know,

like it feels like something out of like an 80s movie, the way that like 90s movies might portray any neighborhood in New York city. Like it kind of reminds me of when Arnold Schwarzenegger jumps out of the movie screen in last action here on is walking around New York and there's like guys getting killed for shoes and stuff. Did you guys have that feeling?

Yeah, I mean, the thing is, Skid Row is like a, is a, is a real major neighborhood in Los Angeles that is majority homeless popular. I mean, it is, it is the major homeless encampment in LA where homelessness is a serious problem. There are a lot of people who are, had to cannot afford basic housing and basic, medical care and the basic education anything like that. So it is like a real tent city like that. So I'm just being incredibly insensitive and uninformable.

No, no, but in the movie, they do danger it up quite a bit. And it seems the movie is version of skin. Okay, so the movie's version of LA here are the people who live in LA. There are suburban families. There are gang bangers from South of the border, and there are homeless children just looking for saviors. And there are also like cops, and that's everybody who lives in Los Angeles is either a suburban mom, a gang banger, a homeless kid, or a cop.

And so like this seems to, it's kind of like the beyond Thunderdome version of Skid Row where it's just like a lot of children wandering around and stuff like that. And it, but Skid Row, it is a real place and a real problem. Now, when they named it Skid Row, did they think possible that they shouldn't of name it Skid Row because then it would become Skid Row?

Well, they named it after the band. Oh, I get you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it was filled with youth gone wild. All right. I don't know. Yeah, exactly. As seen in the movie, all doing the rattlesnake shake. Um,

so yeah, we flashback is the rattlesnake shake. What McDonald's serves when they don't have the jam rock shake on the menu. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they, they, they grab a rattlesnake out of their rattlesnake tub. They start milking that venom. Like you're shaking. They give it to you. They say, we advise you to throw this away immediately. Do not drink it or throw it into the face of your enemies. If they're

lactose intolerant, it's like when when they stop serving the mick rib and they started serving the mick shiv, which has a blade that pops out once you went to bite into it. Very dangerous. Like like that pair of boots, I was googling on the internet for possible purchase Wait in case you met a crocodile dandy or something like what yeah, or in case I had to like in case I was Want to make an audition tape for me to play the tarantula in the next Spider-Man movie I would love it if that was their next thought like what villain should we go to next Tarantula of course, but you can also use that to climb up walls, right? You just like stick the blade into the side of a brick building or something. Oh, yeah. I mean, I've been watching a lot of the rocks, uh, Titan Games television show. And one of their key obstacles is a, uh, like a fake

brick wall where you have to punch through the dry wall to climb up it. You have to make your own holes. It's pretty cool. Usable skills. Okay, so five years earlier. Five years earlier, and we see our hero, Jennifer Garner, playing the character Riley North, which is odd that the woman whose last name is North is fighting Mexican people. That feels racist, but.

So it is subtle. It's all the subtlety of political cartoon where everyone has big labels drawn on them just laying what they're doing. Yep. And yeah, and yeah, I don't want to get into that. So Jennifer Garner is now, back then she was a,

like a soccer mom type. She is hanging out with her daughter selling Girl Scout cookies. She has a brief encounter with a rival Girl Scout cookie mom who is clearly the queen bee type. They argue quite a bit. We find out that it's her daughter's birthday, which is, that's a weird way to spend your birthday, be enforced to sell cookies, but whatever, maybe you know, they got to sell those cookies, got to keep grease in the wheels of industry. And their family is having money trouble. It's not like they can afford to not sell cookies every day.

Yeah, we see that she has to rush off to work. She ends up having to work late, even though it's her daughter's birthday. Her boss at the bank is incredibly unsympathetic to this situation. We also see her husband who I could never find his name, which it turns out it doesn't matter. It doesn't last a very long in the movie. Who is working as a mechanic, and I feel like this is one of those things

where movies have a tendency to underestimate the, like how lucrative it is to be a trained, like a mechanic or a plumber or something, it's like, I'm never gonna get out of this. It's like you shouldn't, it's a good job. It pays well. Yeah.

A tradesman these days is not something to be sneezed at. Unless their trade is sneeze catching. Yeah, and then they would appreciate your business. Go sneeze at your local sneeze catcher today. Like support modern pop sneeze catcher. Yeah, at a max, a max sneeze drive. That's a, that's a special thing. The so sneeze catchers, they're getting it coming in and coming out

because they, you pay them to catch your sneeze and then they turn around and they sell that sneeze to the Chinese's raw material. So it's like they're, they're getting paid both ways. Yeah, both ways. This is a good deal. So and the other thing is like movies always assume that if you have a blue collar job You are one step away from crime

That like not only is it not lucrative and you can't support a family on it But everyone you interact with is probably partly a criminal and you're on the edge of becoming a criminal too, which I Don't like most of the people I know who commit crimes or white collar criminals So maybe that's just the people I know who commit crimes or white collar criminals. So maybe that's just the people I spend time with, my friend Lex, he's a Luther and some of the other guys that I know, but the blue collar people I know, they don't commit crimes as much. Do you think, I mean, do you just think it's a basic idea of like most people feel divorced

enough from the people who do jobs for them, who like do service jobs for them, that they just assume that they operate on the same level as the streets or something? I don't know. Maybe. I think it's a side benefit, a benefit. I think it's a side effect, not a benefit. It's a bad thing. I think it's a side effect of an entertainment industry

that is mostly made up of people who could afford to go to film school or who grew up in the entertainment industry. Like I've been very, like, and I have done very, I've been very lucky in my career and in my life, but I'll look at like screenwriters or directors that I'm interested in. I'm like, I wonder how they got where they are?

Oh, their parents were in the entertainment industry. Like it's a, it's a, not again, guys, why are we getting so political? But there's all this income inequality. And it means that the people who do stuff like this are pretty separated from the people who do stuff like fixing cars. And so they assume that if you, basically, that if you wear a jumpsuit underneath that jumpsuit is like prison uniform or something like that, you know,

a second jump. Stripes underneath the different color. Yeah. And we also find out both jumpsuits. You're right. So we also find out in the movie that it's apparently Christmas time. These are little bits of information to help build this whole world to make it more believable. This takes place in a world where Christmas exists.

So we see her husband, Jennifer Garner's husband, Riley's husband. We see her husband, Jennifer Garner's husband, Riley's husband. He goes by a lot of labels. He meets a friend Mickey, whose name I remember, or Nikki, one of the two. And they're apparently planning to rob the most notorious drug lord in Los Angeles. And it's the only way he can get out of this dead end job of fixing cars. And I mean, I don't know what kind of life he lives, maybe he lives far beyond his means, who knows they have a very, they have a nice living house. But they, so and the,

Husband is going to go to the Christmas carnival. Yeah, the husband is like, not completely on board, but he does like the idea of making a little bit extra money. So we then cut a few hours later, nobody showed up for the daughter's birthday party because they were all at a last minute holiday party thrown by the rival Girl Scout mom Peggy, I think, is her name. And Jennifer Garner comes home, they can misery with their daughter a little bit. And we know that Peggy, the rival gross cut mom, is evil and rich because she is blonde

and her daughter is blonde. And they have matching outfits. Yes, yeah. Ha ha ha ha. You, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, Ellen has the money for matching outfits is evil. And ironically, if their outfits were matching, it would make me think more that they were made at home

by their grandma. And like, I only know one pattern. I can do it in different sizes. People will just assume we're rich. It's okay. The, my favorite moment in the scene is where Jennifer Garner is trying to make a lemonade on a lemons here. And she suggests that they go out for pizza and the look on the dad's face when she says

pizza, he's so excited. Like, he hasn't, he hasn't had a sniff of pizza in weeks. It makes you suspect that the dad had called the other mom and been like, all right, set up a conflicting party to make my daughter sad, and then maybe I can get some pizza out of this deal. He's like, she's got me, Riley's got me on this

bullshit gluten-free diet. I haven't had pizza in a month. The only way we're gonna do it is a code red catastrophe. So you need to ruin my daughter's birthday so that I can finally get some pepperonis in my mouth. Code red catastrophe was a rejected Mountain Dew variety. And it was somebody like, they take a sip of Mountain Dew and then like like a hurricane destroys

the town or something like that. And so it goes, oh, there's a lot of energy. Yeah, I mean, that's a decent, that's a decent commercial pitch. So, so our hero and her family, guys, here's the interesting thing about Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew, as you all know, when it was first released, was a hillbilly themed drink. That's why it's called Mountain Dew because it was supposed to be like moonshine and it has become an extreme sports type thing, but really isn't the most extreme sport living the hillbilly lifestyle.

I mean, I think I think the various television shows have pitched that idea to us, including award-winning Ozark. Yeah, there's nobody who lives more on the edge than your Hill Williams is. And so I think Mountain Dew has been pretty true to its core concept, which is drink this. It'll hurt you probably. Yeah. Yeah, it'll help you get over the pain of your extreme sports injuries. So we are hero and her family going to the Christmas carnival. Actually, Dan, did you win your toy or toilet, did the doctor prescribe Mountain Dew to you? Yes, but only topically.

Yeah, I had to rub it in. Okay, so what you're saying. Yeah, and how did that affect your coat, your belt? My belt. It was shiny and lustrous. Oh, lovely. So our heroes go to the Christmas carnival. They get ice cream and they order two orders So our heroes go to the Christmas carnival.

They get ice cream and they order two orders of rocky road in one order of peppermint. That's right. We got title. That's the one reason it's called peppermint. Is it ever referred to again after this point? That's a big NO. Okay.

It's just not as an avenging angel. It does not come to be known as peppermint. No, and I was waiting for the moment when she like would refer to the peppermint ice cream is like that's that's the detail that sticks in my mind peppermint. She wanted peppermint ice cream. She was still she never had peppermint ice cream before that. She wanted something new. She had her whole life ahead of her doing new things, trying things. She was so open to the world, my daughter.

And you had to do what you did. Well, I hope the last thing that you remember as this bullet goes through your face, because she shoots a lot of people in the face in this movie, is the sweet taste of pepper and ice cream. And then it turns out it's an ad for pepper and ice cream on a whole movie. Yeah, she turns to the stars. New subsidized by for pepper and ice cream on a home movie. Yeah, she turns it just dry.

It's dry. Dryers. Yeah. Yeah, do you think, I mean, do you think there was a scene that was deleted where she bumps into a, like, a humble ice cream vendor? And she, you know, reluctantly buys some ice cream and the vendors like, what flavor would you like? I have plenty of peppermint and her eyes light up.

A light up like she loves peppermint. Yeah, yeah. Because when her daughter died, she took the ice cream and ate it. I'm not peppermint, I just remember this is good ice cream. Yeah, yeah. I guess this is the silver lining. I've learned it like peppermint. Now guys, Dan, you're a cook.

You like to make food. I thought you were going to be like, you're a dad. I'm like, no, I'm not. I'm the same way I got that idea. Dan, you're a dad. Would you enjoy make food. I thought you were gonna be like, you're a dad, and I'm like, no, I'm not. I'm the same way I got that idea. You're like, Dan, you're a dad. Would you enjoy your children being taken from you this way? No, of course not. So Dan, what is it about the combination of pepper

and mint? Is it the freshness of mint and the spiciness of pepper? I see where you as a person who does not enjoy a lot of, let's say, say, yeah, foods may have gotten confused here. You see, it's not peppermint is a type of mint. So mint is not a separate type. No, no, no, no, no, you don't, it's not,

you don't put a pepper with it. Is it like a cracked pepper on it? Yeah, yeah, it cracked black pepper. There's spirit mint and there's peppermint, and I believe there are other kinds of mint. So, spiriment is when you put mint on a spear. No, again, they're just different plants, different varieties of the same plant family.

They all have the same minty flavor. We've grown to know and love. And what's some and tea and what's a franklin mint. Well that's a scam trying to make people think that you can make money off of commemorative. Cool. What about a what about a Dan Mintz? Dan Mintz. I believe he plays Tina on Bob's Burgers. And he's also part of that same plant family? Well, maybe I've never met the man personally.

I hope this has helped. And what about a Mints pie? Okay, well, that's, it's usually a combination of meat and raisins. And what about a minty mouse? It's usually a combination of a meat and like raisins. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And what about a- What about Minty Mouse? Mm-hmm. Or Christopher Miss Plans.

Minty Mouse's girlfriend, uh, mini mouse, I think. Dan, you know what, labels on it. Okay. Mickey and Minnie don't, Mickey and Minty don't believe in labels. Right. They have an open relationship, like my parents, apparently. According to Jessie Thorne. So this isn't how I want you to find out that Jesse is the is the unicorn in your debt in your parents marriage. So while our heroes are having a

shout-out party on some ice creams, we cut across town. We crossed down to the villain of the movie, Garcia the guillotine, a vicious drug lord who has. Tegel Garcia, no guillotine. Yeah. Or guillotine, I don't know how to pronounce it. Who is, who has the potential accomplice of Jennifer Garner's character's husband tied up and beaten up and they're usurrounded by this guy's henchmen, as well as a really cool skeleton statue that has a side. If you are a fan of that type of a statue, get ready.

There's a couple more in this movie. If you liked the, the, the, the, else the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, a trio sequel posters, which were huge bulletin boards, billboards all over LA of a sort of a assassin skeleton. And I was just so glad that my son was not old enough

to really take an interest and be frightened by it because that is good nightmare fuel for a child. It's a 50 foot tall skeleton assassin. Yeah. And he looks, he's got his arms outstretched with guns, like he's reapered doing the deathom ultimate move. Yeah, yeah, exactly So or or or Olig in the posters for dolly g movie But I saw when I went to London years ago before that TV show had come to the United States

And I was like what is this stupid thing everywhere? Everywhere and luckily you did a complete reversal on your opinion of that thing, right? Oh, sure. Well, that my first experience of Oligi was seeing the trailer for that movie before another movie in a British movie theater. And I was like, this is the dumbest movie I've ever seen a trailer for. Almost the entire trailer was about him waking up to find his dog is giving him a blowjob and being okay with it. And I was like, I'm never seeing anything this man makes. Flash forward. Flash forward to when a little movie called Borat came out.

And I watched it and I laughed and then felt really bad about laughing. So we are back in the movie guys. Garcia says, you are going to steal for me, which makes the audience wonder, why were they going to steal from this guy? That seems crazy. So he then pulls out a super cool looking kukri knife and chops the dudes head off and bloodsprays all over that cool ceremonial statue. And something you should mention is that the dad had already called his friend and said, Hey, you know what? I don't want to do it. I changed my mind. My family is too important. I don't want to risk it. But do you know, Garcia

is irritated that the guy just had the very thought of stealing from him. If he didn't go through with it. And does he even know that like did they mention that he that Garcia had read the had heard the voicemail or no? Because it feels like everybody cons in this movie, everybody constantly knows all of the possible information. Nobody is surprised in this movie. I think we're supposed to assume that Mickey ratted out that they tortured him and he ratted out a untitled, unnamed husband of Riley North.

But it's also it, the characters just know stuff that the movie needs them to know. It's like the characters will wander around like morons and just know stuff that the movie needs them to know. It's like, the characters will wander around like morons and then it's like, the movie needs you to know this thing. It's time for you to know it. And they'll just wake up with that information in their head as if through some sort of gnostic meditation, they have somehow achieved inner information from the universe.

You know? Uh, so the, yeah, so he says, oh, he's even going to consider stealing from me, make a big, send a big message. So he sends a trio of guys in a car with oozees to drive by them at the at the Christmas carnival and shoot them full of bullets from their uzies. Killing Jennifer Garner's family and hitting her in the head, I guess, with a bullet. Yeah, she goes into a coma. And a police detective visits her and says, we all know Diego Garcia did it,

but nobody will testify. And Jennifer Garner then flashes back to what we just saw one scene earlier of her family being gunned down. And it was like, movie, did you think we forgot? Like, is that in case people thought somebody who bought a ticket thinking this was a violent movie was like, oh, I guess it's a Christmas carnival movie.

I'll go use the bathroom now and miss that scene. Well, but it's also weird. It's also hurt. Like, he's like, you know, known with like no witnesses will testify. And it's her being like, I'll testify because I saw it. And this is the point where I'm like, you know, no one will like, no witnesses will testify and it's her being like, I'll testify because I saw it. And this is the point where I'm like bullshit, bullshit movie at the best of times, at the best of times, eyewitness testimony is mostly bullshit. Like it's mostly bunk, like people are not good at being eyewitnesses.

But this is Jennifer Garner who saw these gang members driving past in a car from several feet away and got shot herself in the head. In the head. She's not going to be able to identify these people, but she identifies them with crack accuracy. Well, it also helps that when they do, he brings her into do a lineup for all the guys. And they do three different things. Wait, let me just say real quick, quick Dan nice job doing the evil pro the evil

defendants job for defense lawyer makes basically the same argument at the right though. Like there's no like. Oh yeah, let's get that. Let's get that sound clip down. Yeah, check out my cousin Vinnie over here making the big case. So Stuart, they go to the lineup. They go the lineup. Each batch of lineups are, it's silly because they'll bring out five guys. And one guy in each batch who is the culprit has very obvious face tattoos. No one else has a tattoo, but they pick out, they only have those

guys. So. That's what I was going to say, Dan, is that it's a little easier when they have pre-marked themselves with identifying tattoos on their face. And just as with zebras, no two zebras have the same stripe pattern, and the two tigers have the same stripe pattern, no two fictional gangbangers have the same tattoo clearly a failing of the police department for not finding other line-up members who have tattoos. Wow. Wow. Check out Mr. American Civil Liberties Cucoyo over here. So we want to spell the myth of the reliable eyewitness. That's all.

That's the most important thing that this podcast can do. Dan, spend the podcast 12 years ago hoping for an opportunity to get across the idea that eyewitness testimony is not reliable, which it's not, that's true. You can only, it's one of those funny things where it's like, if I was a defense attorney, they'd be like, we have eyewitnesses who put your client at the scene and I'd say, hey, have you ever read a baronstein bears joke,

a baronstein bears book? Yeah, yeah, I love the baronstein bears. Then perhaps you'd really know they're actually the baronstein bears and the jury's mind would be blown. And they'd be like, what, what, I love the baronstein bears. Then perhaps you'd really know they're actually the baronstein bears, and the jury's mind would be blown. And they'd be like, what? What? What? And I'd say exhibit a baronstein bears. Yeah. 1982. That's right. You all remembered it wrong.

So how can we believe that this eyewitness is reliable? When your own memories of your favorite vaguely conservative bear family are not reliable. I rest my case, and the judge would be like, whoa, is everything alive? Can I trust my own brain and people would just be like sawing their heads open to pull their brains out? Cause they felt betrayed. And my client in suing chaos,

I would just slip him some money to disappear. Oh wow, yeah, that's, I like this humble small town lawyer, a screen player working on. Yeah, it's called the Bernstein lawyer. So we get, we get a little bit of an info dump at this point while Detective Carmichael, our hero detective and his partner detective, something else whose name I don't remember. I couldn't get his name either. So his, the partner who seems to be acting kind of shady throughout the whole movie,

but that's just a big twist him up later on. We get a bit of an info dump about Garcia, the guillotine and how he's the most notorious gangster in the city and that he even has, he even has people in the police department working for him. And so the partner says to Carmichael, you better let this go. Like, this is dangerous. You're playing with fire and you might get burned.

And Carmichael, who kind of looks like a, like, Ike Baron Holtz, like, Ike Baron Holtz is like, stand in. Yeah, Spike Baron Holtz. Yeah, he's the, he's the kind of like, if you saw the terrible Aaron Sorkin show the newsroom Which I did because it was like most late parent period Aaron Sorkin. It was enjoyable to watch And be angry at He was the like doofy kind of like love interesty guy And he's very baby-faced, but they try and make him not baby-faced by giving him a big bushy mustache and some

Some stubble. Yeah. Dan, now I just imagine you're going to see to Killamockingbird on Broadway. And just like, you're hate watching it because it's Aaron Sorokin. You're like, and you're just loudly going like, as if and you're like live tweeting, you're snark of it. I mean, there's so expensive. Why did I do this?

And there's a reason to hate that production because they've been, they've been going around like for sending people cease and desist orders to halt their own productions of. They have been, they have been shutting down school versions of skill of modern community productions, but that's not Aaron Sorkin's fault. That's. You don't think he's pulling the strings? That's true. So sinister puppet master Aaron Sorkin. So let me, I want to say one thing again about these, these, these thugs that have been,

that she has, the garner has eyewitnessed. They are so cartoonishly thugged. Yeah, yeah. Like, they are just so over the toply, like nonhuman and just mean and angry. And also, and we, uh, we'll get to later when they actually have their headquarters are literally an opinionata factory. But so they, there's a, there's what in the rainment and Dan McCoy, super defense attorney, he gets Jennifer Garner's testimony basically thrown into doubt.

And Jennifer Garner has, the judge says they'll be no trial here. And Jennifer Garner has, the judge says, there'll be no trial here. And Jennifer Garner has an outburst and tries to attack the attackers and gets tased and sentenced to be thrown in a mental hospital. And this is after she's... She's laughing.

I'm like, I don't know if that's the way it works too. Like just like take her away to a mental hospital, boys, but I'm not there. It is so crazy that the judge is just like, based on this, I mean, you could, if some, if a witness decided to try to assault a suspect, even if the suspect hadn't just been let loose by this crazy judge, that would still be a crime.

Yeah. But the idea that he's just like, you're crazy, take her to the booby hatch, like get this, get this lady out of here, like his nuts. Yeah, it's, and this is is after like we see that she's kind of pushed to the breaking point at this point. Obviously like she lost her family. There's a little scene where we find out that she has lost her house and is being affected. This idyllic middle class life that she had can so quickly be snatched from her by forces

outside of her control. And that they were so struggling for. You know what, they were struggling. They were forgotten by the community at large. And now they're being stepped on by this institutional system that is so totally stacked against the last white people. And even the evil lawyer had showed up to her house and tried to pay her off. And I feel like the amount of money you was trying to give her was more than her husband would have stolen.

Also, yeah, we didn't really address that. Well, also the last one was a giant publisher's clearing house check for $3 million. Yeah, I was like, maybe she should have mentioned at some point, hey, that guy is defending the criminals. Literally came to my house, the big stack of money, like the guy who's defending the criminals literally came to my house, the big stack of money. Like the guy who's not real, a person. I'm sure she did. The judge said, yeah, overruled in real. That's hearsay. She's like, it's not hearsay. It happened. I was right there.

So, well, you have a, you're an eyewitness. Well, we haven't argued me against that. Dan McCoy, come on out and explain why she's wrong. So they throw her in after she's been tased, she watched the villains cackle at her as she's dragged off. She's putting on the back of a ambulance, she then breaks free by attacking the detective who I guess was trying to save her. And she hits him in the head and she runs off. And it felt like for a moment the ambulance workers looked at the detective and were like, well, our orders were to take somebody to the mental hospital.

But this is also like a very like zero to 60 moment where it's like she was a bereaved housewife moments before. And then suddenly she turns it like, suddenly her response to being taken to a middle hospital is to like kick her way out of an ambulance. Well, it's that moment. It's the moment when like someone goes, it's she basically has that Wolverine moment

where she's like, I'm a person, I'm a person. No, now I'm so mad I'm reverting to the savage animal inside me. And it gives her super strength and also super animal cunning to figure out how to escape and get away. And I feel like the most appropriate animal to tap into at this point is a crow, because this movie is basically lifting the plot of the crow. The it's, it just goes to show that within every one of us is a beast, just waiting to be let out.

Which beast is named Gringoor. Uh-huh, okay. Yeah, and he's like kind of a cuddly, you know, like cuddly, tuddly teddy bear, but he also is very good with macromé and crocheting. He's just very crafty. So Gringoor is a very crafty beast and that's what's inside of me and otherwise very violent and like hostile person. I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm not really, I'm Detective Carmichael looks exactly the same and he and his partner who are still partners are

go to the scene of a crime at the Christmas carnival, of course, where they say Christmas carnival and what do they find hanging from the Ferris wheel? Yep, we see three gangsters, the three defendants, the three guys who killed her family are hung upside down from the Ferris wheel. And which leads me to ask the question. So does she climb up the Ferris wheel, dragging those bodies or did she? No, no, yeah. They're on and nobody noticed. Yeah, I mean, you, you time and then you turn it. That's how it works. I get you. I get you. Yeah, and this is like this. Are you saying there should have been a scene where she's comically trying to climb up the thing and they keep falling and she's like, oh, no.

Oh, man. And then the, and the, the carney folk who down at the bottom are just like, just turn, turn the wheel so it gets to just time on the ground and then turn it. And she's like, I didn't have the key. You just had to ask us, just ask us to use the key. We will use this, this fairs wheel for revenge all the time. Yeah. Yeah, yeah so I was watching this This movie with with my friend and like both of us this this scene points us points up the biggest problem that we both had with the movie wait

Dan I I asked if you want to watch it with me and you said you couldn't watch it So you have another friend that you watch movies with? you couldn't watch it. So you have another friend that you watch movies with. Oh, so the podcast just canceled. I thought you told me that you like to watch movies by yourself now in a dark room so that you have no distractions. What's going on, Dan? Dan, you told me that in order to better enhance you at the inner you you are cutting yourself all from off from all human

Contact except for every two weeks to record this podcast. Yeah, no, I live in a sensory deprivation tank now A century deprivation I live in a sensual that prays. That's how Rosalgool stays alive forever It's just it's just it's just me floating in a bunch of a loop It's just me floating in a bunch of a loop. Yeah, I spent many years in a sexual deprivation tank. From roughly the ages 16 to 24, I think. Thanks for being specific. Where I was deprived of sexuality.

Okay, anyway, no, let me, I was pulling up his notes as if I had got a point you made your point you have another friend Yeah, that's not a peppermint we understand you know we don't need to check the receipt stand you have friends This movie this movie cuts out The most interesting shit, uh-huh for instance It cut the entire part where she learns how to be like not just a normal lady, but a super ninja assassin. And but we also like in these movies, no one expects her killing the people that actually

killed her family to be the final boss. Like that is not the last people that you kill in a revenge movie, you kill the people who ordered the hit in the first place. Yeah. But you usually have a satisfying moment where you see the actual killing of the killers. I thought we saw that right at the very beginning of the movie. Here we skip to just them being strung up on a, on a, on on a Paris wheel.

Mm-hmm. And it's like, well, what what are we doing style? Why are we? I'm just I'm just doing a revenge movie. We never saw her kill that sacred deer. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh. I mean, I don't know.

I'm not a big. I'm not a big Yorgos Lantemos fan. Um, so we. Oh, Dan, one of the thing that you that you mentioned is we learn also that she what she did was she robbed a bank, then traveled the world becoming an assassin off camera, and then came back for her revenge. How do you guys think she decided it was time

to get the revenge? Cause it's been five years. I mean, I feel like she was looking at, she started her process of becoming a killing machine, honing her body, perfecting her brain, et cetera. And she looked at her calendar and she's like, when would be a good anniversary? And I think five years makes sense. And I'm glad that she timed it pretty well.

Oh, that is the revenge anniversary. I guess that's true. Five years is revenge. Ten years is forgiveness. Fifteen years is, the forgiveness was a trick. Actually it's double revenge. Who did you, what did you get for Danielle for your five-year anniversary, revenge, anniversary?

Revenge. I said, I said, I said, I said, you got a DVD copy of revenge. Oh yeah, I got a right of name on a piece of paper. I won't ask any questions. That person has taken care of, if you know what I mean. And she wrote down her best friend's name. Oh, that's crazy.

And I surprised. And I took care of her best friend, if you know what I mean. And then she came back, she goes, so what did you do that was nice to take care of my best friend's name. Oh, that's crazy. I'm surprised. And I took care of her best friend if you know what I mean. And then she came back and she goes, so what did you do that was nice to take care of my best friend? And I was like, oh, oh boy. Yeah. LA looked at the name, put his hands over his face, and he morphed into a different person like a faceless man. Yeah. Here's something that I always wonder about mob bosses is whether it becomes difficult for the people they work with to figure out exactly

what they're saying when they're like, make sure Silvio leaves a, leads a long happy life. You got it, boss. Like they never really know if he actually means that sarcastically or not. I feel like this was a bit in like, uh, in like that. What? Mafia or whatever the fuck movie that was like, yeah, Jane Austen's mafia. Yeah, that feels like something straight out

of there. The only bit I remember from that movie is when, uh, Lloyd Bridges is aged mob boss character is being shot with a machine gun in a herky jirky way that makes it so that he starts doing the macarena. Yeah, that's. Yeah, that's going to last forever. Seeing that in the theater and being like, what the hell am I watching? Where are we in this movie? OK, so we find out that the FBI has a file on her and that we get this huge amount of information

about all of her adventures in backstory. Her adventures in babysitting. And how she has, you know, she's adventures and backstory. Or adventures and babysitting, huh? And how she has, you know, she's been traveling the world, she's become an MMA fighter, she has robbed a bunch of guns recently from a gun store and picked out exactly the perfect guns to use. And so we get all this information, she is a fully formed killing machine at this point in the movie.

Yes. And so she goes on her rampage. She blows up the judge who let the bad guys go off camera. She kills the, what the DA, you know, she's or the defense attorney, whatever. She kills both of them, I think. And then we cut to her torturing the judge who so quickly dismissed her case. She's demanding that he just tell her her name. All he has to do is remember her name, which was then echoed in a recent Saturday night

live sketch. It doesn't work. She steals a toy, blows up the judge, and then gives the toy she stole from a judge to a kid she meets on the bus, which makes it the perfect crime. And that leads to my favorite line in the home movie where she so the kid on the bus has this deadbeat drunk dad and she threatens the deadbeat drunk dad at gunpoint says you be a better dad. Take this kid to buy some presents, but before that the dad as they're walking off the

bus, he says to his kid, who gave you that shitty toy? And it's like so unnecessarily mean. Like, there's no reason for him to notice it. There's no reason for him to disparage it. Just who gave you that shitty toy? My reaction to this film, the scene of the film, by the way, was like, all right, so like,

we're only a couple of kills in, but we've already got Mission Creep on the behalf of Jennifer Garter. Now she's just avenging random kids on the on the on the bus, but also like best kid like there are two scenarios that happen here after she threatens us dead. Like either she threatens him and then he immediately backs slides as soon as she's out of sight, which is the most likely thing that almost certainly Almost certainly. Almost certainly. Or he just pretends to love his kid for the rest of his life because he's afraid of Jennifer Garner.

Yeah. Or he calls the police and said a crazy lady put a gun in the face in the liquor store. And they said, oh, did it look like Jennifer Garner? Yeah, it did. Oh, that's Riley North. She's a one woman killing machine. You better watch out, too. Yep.

Don't post anything on social media because people will trash you. We also learned that Diego's in trouble with the cartel. He lost a couple shipments of drugs, and they, and they, and now she, he's worried. Now he really has, as if it wasn't enough that Riley wants to kill him. Now he really has a motivation. Yeah, and we know, we know it's a,

the meeting he has with his cartel boss. We know it's a drug lab because it's full of people in their underpants packing drugs, New Jack City style. And of course, he has more of those super cool skeleton statues holding sides. Now cut to, we got our first real big set piece in the movie, which is Jennifer Garner breaks into the gang headquarters, which as we mentioned earlier is a pinata factory, which is a little on the nose. I mean, the one thing this movie doesn't do is they don't have a shootout at a Kinssen Yara celebration.

I guess we should be thankful for that. And she has a blanket draped over her, like she's some kind of low budget Jedi. And there's a news report about her rampage. She's shooting all these guys. She loves to shoot people in the face. She gets caught while she's in there and she fights her way through everybody. She has this kind of infinite ammo military grade shot,

but it just keeps firing and it hurls people backwards. And I'll say, I think at this point, like the action sequences aren't bad. Like they're readable. They have some stakes. They're not, I think they're pretty good. Oh yeah, they're not terrible action sequences. Everything about the movie otherwise

is just like the context they're in is terrible. Yeah, so of course. Yeah. I was about, yep. I would just like to say something about the Pinyata factory, like, yep, go on Dan. No, I just, I want to tread lightly. You want to see the room where they stuff the peonialos

with stuff. God this. You were wondering why they didn't have any of those licensed peoniala characters that look a little bit off model. No, that would be hilarious. Licensed. No, I want to tread lightly because I don't want to be misunderstood, which I almost certainly will be, but like. So what you're saying is you're just a man whose intentions are good. Uh-huh. This is gonna. This is gonna go well.

Please don't let him be misunderstood. There are a lot of movies out there that like, um, trying to avoid charges of racism by like making like their gangs ridiculously multicultural. Mm-hmm. Which is silly in its own way because like, like unfortunately like that's not usually how these things work. Like, like the gang system typically is sort of culturally,

like, yeah, like, you're like, unfortunately, there's just not enough integration in our gang. Yeah. We need to, we need to start really working on that, everybody. But there's a way to like make this movie and not have every Mexican gang where it just be a faceless monster that is shot by a white lady, especially in this modern climate where immigration is a huge issue

that is being used as a divisive topic. So maybe it's the wrong movie for this time is perhaps what I'm saying, or anytime. That's what I wanted to say about the Pignata factory shootout. So let's leave a pause so people can gas at Dan's insensitivity. And then we'll pick it back up.

We get some news stories about the shootout at the P pinata factory uh... the the news is incredibly uh... informed at this point like they know every single thing and also people on social media have already picked up this story they know her whole story and they are the there behind her she's a champion of the people uh... it is. It is referred to by the FBI agent as a typical social media shit storm. Uh, and Diego is like, now I'm serious. I'm putting out a hit on Riley North, because here's what Riley North is. She leaves one guy alive at the Pinyata factory

to, uh, to send a message. The guy, here's what I, and he, and she's like, tell me everything. And she threatens how many reveals everything. That guy, if it was me, and he, and she's like, tell me everything and she threatens how many reveals everything. That guy, if it was me, I am leaving town, I'm never coming back. But instead, he goes back to Diego to be like, hey, boss, sorry, I told her everything about where all our drug stuff is. Hey, frenzies still, you know, people make mistakes.

Like Diego, to Eris human, but to forgive his divine. So maybe you can give me a mulligan on this one. Diego, of course, replies to this by killing him. Like, it's a foolish move. What if after the scene of the Pignata factory, by the way, the drug lord goes through and he's like, where are all my henchmen? Where are the dead bodies of my henchmen?

And he looks through and then finally, he hits a Pignata and all these body parts. Well, I mean, that'd be a huge Pignata. I just imagine somebody driving up to buy a pinata with their kid for their kid's birthday party and just be like, okay, what kind of pinata do you want? You want a Spider-Man pinata? I mean, I know it's kind of weird to hit Spider-Man because you're such a big fan of his. Literally to beat him with a baseball bat until his body bursts open, but we can get you

a Spider-Man pinata. Anyway, it seems like more the kind of thing a villain would do, but okay, let's just look in here and oh god, oh no, they've been burst like so many Pinyatas. Do you think that happened or no? Probably, they probably cut that. Yeah, I would imagine, yeah, yeah. Now guys, here's something I want to tell you.

Or like a family shows up to buy a Pinyata, and they're like, this is a strange looking Pinyata, and they're like, oh no, it's a dead guy. Doesn't look like SpongeBob. Now here's, here's, okay guys, something I wanted to mention in this scene. Diego's henchmen are all standing around and they're like, so what are we going to do boss? And he buys himself some time by pouring himself a drink. And at this moment, I was like, okay, you know what?

Diego is a manager. He has to make decisions very quickly in front of his subordinates, while they're literally watching him and waiting. And I really sympathize with that kind of pressure and stress on someone who finds themselves in like a mental manager position. We're gonna do the wrong thing.

This is gonna hurt the organization. If I do the wrong thing, I'll get in trouble with my bosses. I don't really have a lot of time and I don't have the space to like get in a room and really think it out by myself. You know what? I have to make this decision right now and I have to do it with the pressure

of the eyes of my employees on me. I really sympathize with that. It was the first time that I think I sympathized with the character in the movie. Yeah, and he makes that call. You know, he understands that you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. So. And now is when we learn that, uh, there's one portion of Skid Crow, Skid

Crow. Just one portion of Skid Crow. Skid Crow is of course, uh, the version of the crow that I did is stars the members of Skid Row, uh, that Skid Row has been crime free for three months. Wait a minute, Riley North returned to America three months ago. Oh, and as if and just to drive the point home, there's a huge wall mural of Riley North as an avenging angel with guns in her hands on the side of a building. Yeah, move over, Alita. We got a new battle angel. Um, the yeah, so yeah, this is all figured out by the very FBI agent who's been liaising with Detective Carmichael and Detective Bell Tram. Thank you IMDB.

That's his name. FBI agent Lisa Inman. And there's like jokes that there might be a romantic relationship between her and the Carmichael. Carmichael. That felt pretty weird. But it's all a big bit of a film making trick or runie, but we'll get to that in a second.

And so Riley, she gets, they trapper in an exploding drug lab, right? Yeah. Like, it goes to take down a lab and they trapper in it, but she escapes through the sewers like a regular Ninja Turtle. Mm-hmm. Yep, she's chomping on some people. A regular Ninja Turtle, not a Teenage Mutant one. Not a Teenage Mutant, yeahaking. A regular Ninja Turtle. Not a Teenage Turtle. Not a Teenage Turtle. Not a Teenage Turtle. Yeah, just a regular Ninja Turtle.

Not one, one who is either middle aged or not radioactive or not mutated in any way. Yeah. And so she steals a car to get away. And then she does what I think is the second funniest thing in the movie after where did you get that shitty toy? There's like a cup of soda in the car that the owner of the car had.

And she just picks it up and gulps, slurps it down. Yeah, I think there's a moment where she starts drinking that. She's like, this reminds me of my old life. The person I used to be when I enjoyed soda, peppermint soda. I think what she did is she picks it up and she takes a sip and she's like, oh, sprite. Well, whatever. So yeah, she, she used the car. She tails the gangsters who are very excited to be able to call shots as they are promised by their boss. She drives around them and then murders both of them and then takes the car and shows up

at Diego Garcia's home. Now, here's my question. Yep. Does she drink or eat whatever she finds in the thugs car, too? I mean, I can only assume that seems to be her calling card. It's like they go to the judges house and they're like, someone blew up the judge and they ate his leftovers. I mean, she took that.

Riley North was here. She took that toy, right? So. She always, she's always stealing a little bit of something because it's weirdly for a movie that is about someone who is basically turned herself into a human bullet who is dedicated only to killing Yeah, the thing the thing that really symbolized for me that she's at rock bottom is just picking up a cup of soda and somebody Else's car that you don't know what it's in and just drink what's in it is just drinking it like that's so gross to me Yeah, to wrap your lips around somebody else's straw and just drink whatever they have in their car that I was like

Wow, she really does have no fear. She really is on a rock bottom. So she tricks the large security force at the well appointed home of the drug lord by just rolling the car forward and then she keeps jumping around shooting them. And again, this is a, I think this is a well choreographed, organized action sequence. It reads well, obviously terrible movie. Don't agree with A of this, but she fights her way into the compound. She has a final showdown, or so it seems with Garcia. She has them in her sights. But then her greatest weakness, her kryptonite shows up. That's right, a little

kid who when she looks at the Garcia's daughter, she sees her own daughter's face and that leaves her open to an ice pick attack to the side. And he, we saw him like fucking around a week. Yeah, we saw him, we saw him fucking around with that ice pick right earlier. I feel like he was like jamming it into a bucket of ice cubes and I'm like, you don't need a nice pick for this dude. Like, they're already cubes. I mean, sometimes ice cubes, you know, they like melt a little and then I prefer you to get there and like, you gotta re-separate. Oh, no, that seems far fetched. I'm with Dan on this one. Dan won me over with that I witnessed our argument earlier and I'll just believe whatever he says. So yeah, I see how it is.

But maybe he's like, maybe he prefers crushed ice to cube dice. I mean, he is a monster. We do know that he is an evil villain. So maybe he does prefer to have little weird, gravely chunks of ice that slip into your throat and you crunch on him as opposed to beautiful cubes that keep the water cold and you don't have to swallow them whole. Maybe he's just the kind of evil villain that prefers crushed ice. You're listening, you're listening Jesse Thorn, not my dad.

That's what we think about your pebble ice shit. Oh wow, Jesse likes pebble ice. Oh man, I guess I gotta update my fucking live journal about Jesse's preferences. Yeah, I'll put that in my dossier. Wow, you're gonna give that to a hitman squad. Yeah, my Mr put that in my dossier. Wow, you're going to get that to your hitman squad. Yeah, my Mr. Sinister style database on everybody I know and everything about them. So Riley's hurt.

We do not get the satisfactory ending we're hoping for. In fact, there's much more movie to go. She escapes the home. Garcia gets the remainder of his henchmen around him. He is once again impregnable and offended. She goes to the only place she thinks she can go. That's right. The home of the rival mom Peggy, where she immediately punches her former rival on the face, ties her up, and then enjoys the luxuries of Peggy's home.

And also threatens her with a gun to the point that Peggy pees herself, a surprising amount. And I don't know why you're judging that part of it. I just say it was like, it was, it was just surprised at how quickly the pee hit the floor. And I'm like, because she puts a gun in her face and then immediately there's water splattering, like there's liquid splattering on the floor. And I was like, that's what you, like your pants would absorb most of that.

Do you think she was already peeing when before the gun even came out? I mean, that would make sense. She was tied up for so long. She already has the gun. It doesn't need to be pointed out of her. But yeah, so we see our hero, Bully a woman. But you know, she, you know, she deserved having a gun stuck in her face

because she was not nice. Do you think she was all the last minute party ones? Yeah, she was, do you think she was in a, like, part of Garcia's plan was he cut Peggy to throw that party? So that's right. Maybe. So tell us what happens next with Carmichael. Yeah, so we introduce the cops show up to Garcia's home.

They're picking over the bodies. We're introduced to method man. That's right. He's in this movie. We got a new character who is playing one of the detectives and he reveals that Carmichael is unavailable. Carmichael's partner, Beltrance, like, where is he? Turns out Carmichael has been lying to both of them and we realize that he is the dirty cop.

Just in time for him to show up to meet his FBI contact who we thought was a love interest at Skid Row and then he shoots her. Yeah, this is the one stab the movie makes it being like, see, we're not racist. The white cop was the bad cop and the Hispanic cop was good. Uh huh, that's true. The movie's previous racism made me believe that it was going to go the other direction.

Exactly. I mean, also the fact that the good cop, the man who turns out to be the good cop, Beltran is constantly presented as kind of sinister and hiding something. Yeah. And and like kind of like a shadowy figure, whereas Carmichael is always presented as being Jennifer Garner's kind of sympathetic protector. Really, he was just watching her because he's working for the cartel. And he calls in the location of Riley's battle van to Diego. So the drug lord does the, you know, the smart choice, which is he gets all his guys to go down to Skid Row and start popping off and shouting and rousing.

Popping and locking, they're just dancing. Singing Skid Row from Little Shap of Horrors. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so they try and draw out, they try and draw Riley out by attacking the people that had previously been under, oh, I guess, still are under her production. And she, I think, kills a couple of them

and tricks a couple of them and eventually uses a stolen phone to videotape videotape Diego Garcia and Carmichael and videotape all this shit. And I guess she facetimes the news. I don't exactly know how this happened. It's something that the police are literally like, hey, check out the TV. And on the news, Riley is facetTiming with the anchor explaining what's going on and how this is a big deal and that guy's a dirty cop and LAPD come on down. And it's

one of those things where you're like, I guess she decided to do it publicly so that the LAPD, if they were dirty, couldn't just get rid of her if she just called them. But it's just this very funny thing of like, this aspect of like, hey, someone I know, it's treated with the importance of, hey, someone I know is on TV. Like, oh, Riley North, this person I know a little bit, I get, they're in New York and they're behind the window at the Today Show. And I can see them waving.

This is amazing. Like, it kind of comes out of nowhere and it's very goofy, but it's handled very casually. Like, oh yeah, of course, she's just gonna FaceTime with the news. Like, oh, yeah, of course, she's just going to face time with the news. Yeah. So, and I think she used the phone from the FBI agent, right? She finds it on the FBI agent's body in the dumpster. To be honest, I kind of, I wasn't sure where she got the phone from. I had forgotten. And so I thought for a minute, oh, did she have a phone this whole time? Yeah. So did Riley North, like, go in and sign up for a plan?

Yeah, yeah. Like, so the, you know, really trying to upsell her on the, on one of the newer iPhones and she's like, I'll just take an older one, like it doesn't matter. I don't, it doesn't have FaceTime on it. Yeah, but you're also gonna want this measuring app that it's like you have a level with you all the time.

I mean, that's kind of useful though, right? I use my level app. I hang pictures. Oh, you have pictures? Yeah, I do. Wow, okay. I've got friends and I've got pictures. I guess Dan has this rich full life outside

of what I know him from. So I guess that's where you know me from. Oh, you're that guy from the podcast. So, Garci, you know, threatens a street kid, right? To draw out Riley. Yeah, he's threatening one of the humble urchins who has been part of the like Greek chorus of homeless people in this movie. These surprisingly clean faced street kids. So she turns herself in, she turns herself over, she kind of like challenges him to a fight and they fight for a little bit and he's beating you up.

And then he knocks her into a shopping cart where Carmichael had previously stashed the murder weapon that he used to kill FBI agent Inman. And just then that's about when the, uh, the police show up. Mm-hmm. Garcia is not happy about this because previously he thought they were his friends. So he just immediately shoots Carmichael in front of everybody. Uh, and then he and his gang kind of scatter and run amongst the, uh, the, the, the tent city. Uh, he and Garcia and, have their final showdown. They punch a bunch and she beats them up

and she has, that sounds like a TV action kid show with a punch a bunch. So she's got a gun on him, the cops got guns on her, they're like don't do it and she goes like, don't do it. And she goes, I'm going to do it. So she just shoots him and kills him. And then they shoot her. And then that's what they like. Oh, yeah. Then she like sneaks away. And just, well, this is the most inexplicable moment in the movie. There are so many cops surrounding them. It's a pretty well lit night time area. She shoots. She shoots Garcia and the cops shoot at her and then bell trans like stop cease fire cease fire and they look and she's gone. She's disappeared

and it's like in what the haze of gun smoke like I did it's how did they how did she they're all watching guns smoke so that's what it's just this moment of like there is no possible way they would not see her running off somewhere she let's at this this is the moment where she becomes Jason essentially or Michael Myers where it's like, oh yeah, he fell down right over there. Huh? He's gone. Sure.

It's like she relies. She was close to death and use whatever it item. You use to summon yourself back to the spawn point so you don't lose all your experience points. Exactly. So she sneaks off and detectives like I know she's going, because everybody knows everything that's important. And they find, of course, Detective Beltrein finds her crumpled

at the grave of her family. She's like, just let me die and he's like, no can do, I gotta take you in. So she is taken in and then she's in the hospital handcuffed and Beltrein shows up and he's like, you know what? and then she's in the hospital handcuffed and Beltrane shows up and he's like, you know what? There's an announcement on the TV that the LAPD will be, she will be brought up on charges,

she will go to trial as she should because no matter how righteous her cause, she is a regular human being who has decided to take the law of murder into her own hands and killed dozens of people. So she's handcuffed to the bed and Beltran shows up again and he says, you know what? All those cops would have done the exact same thing and then gives her the keys to the cuffs and that is the end of the movie. So I wonder why did he take her in in the first place?

I guess to get the medical care, I'm not sure. Oh yeah, and also maybe it looks good for his, does it look good for his like record that he closed the case? It is job, yeah, probably. Well, I love that like at his employee review, they're like, okay, compliment number one, you really handled the situation well with Riley North

and that you brought her in. A little bit of criticism you let her go. Yeah. And then- You just gave her the key to the cuffs, that's- And then I just wanted to add with a compliment that you really bounced back well from your partner turning out to be Crooked Cop,

who was then murdered in front of you. So I guess that's the review is I really want you to work harder on not letting them go after you bring them in. And keeping a better eye on your partner, getting a snow if he turns out to be a crooked. So it was pretty obvious. And pretty obvious. And the next cup, pretty obvious. They use crooked. We gave you all the clues, Mr. Policeman, but now, if you need some help, I'll give you the key to the bat signal. If you can send in a detective bullock now, he's a player. I appreciate it. And detective Montoya. Uh, yeah. So that is peppermint. We get some hard rock and tunes over the credits. That's Stuart's favorite part.

So all right, we've almost gone as long as the movie itself. Let's say our final judgment is quickly whether this is a good bad movie, a bad bad movie or long as the movie itself. Let's say our final judgment's quickly, whether this is a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie we kind of liked. I think it was bad bad. I think it was the most basic revenge movie, but it didn't give me even the sick thrills that a revenge movie normally gives me.

I wasn't like, yeah, kill those people. I was like, this makes me feel gross. And I was kind of bored. I have to admit, I do't like, yeah, like kill those people. I was like, this makes me feel gross. And I was kind of bored. I have to admit, I dozed off a couple times and I was mostly doing the action sequences, which... Hey Dan, let me tell you, let me let you in on something. You don't have to admit that. I do.

I do have to admit it. I'm legally required to admit that I dozed off a couple times during the action sequences, which Stuart seemed to think were the best thing about the movie, so I didn't even get that enjoyment. So no thanks, peppermint. Mm-hmm. There's that supposed to be a pun.

No thanks to peppermint. I don't know. It's my 40s detective catchphrase. No thanks, peppermint. I just like, the idea of like, you're like, Dan is like an Arnold Schwarzenegger type action hero and his catchphrases no thanks So here's the thing I think this is a bad bad movie It's kind of creepy and it's like the thinnestly

thinnest drawn Like like straw man type type villains, right? uh, like like straw man type type villains, right? Um, but it, the, I think the action scenes are actually pretty decent. They make sense. Uh, and the storytelling is the fastest I've ever seen. They give you all the information, uh, it never pauses, although it's way too long. Uh, if maybe if the movie had ended the first time she attacked Garcia in his house, I might have been a little bit better for a shitty grind house movie, but it just goes on too long.

This is a bad, bad movie. Don't watch it. But Jennifer Garner, Jennifer Garner says, I think a solid action actor. Still, she remains a solid action. I loved the first few seasons of A-Lay. So it's kind of excited to see this movie before I realized it was going to be horrible. And you were telling me how much you loved her as Electra, right?

Oh, yeah. She was electric. I think you raved. Best Marvel movie ever. Better than Black Panther, raves Dan McCoy. I think, yeah, bad, bad movie. It makes you feel gross. And there's lots of stuff about it as we mentioned that is problematic, but also it's just like not fun and it's just gross. And there's only so much credit I'll give for movie for having a great line.

Like where did you get that shitty toy? If you're going to watch a movie starring a very accomplished actress where she is thrust into a situation where she asked to kick ass to protect her child or get revenge. There's a movie called Kidnap. It stars Halle Berry. We covered it on the show before. If you want to see like a grimy, grind house movie about a mom driven to the edge, I'd

say go for Kidnap instead. That's not my recommendation for the episode, but Bad Ben Movie. Go see Kidnap instead. Now, guys, let's talk about something that's good, good. And that's the Max Fun Drive. Yes, please. The listeners chance, as we were saying, to get involved with the Max Fun community to support the shows they love in the form of monies that we can then spend on clothes, food, housing, luxury items, medical care, all sorts of things.

Renting the movies that we have to watch for the show. That's true. I mean, they're a web hosting, all those big costs. So Dan, I wondered, should we talk about the gifts that people could get? Yes, please. We know what we get from it, we get money, but what do the gifts get?

Well, let's talk about the levels. You want me to go through them? Yeah, please. Please. We know what we get from it. We get money, but what do the gifts get? Well, let's talk about the levels. You want me to go through them? Yeah, sure. Okay. First off, there's that $5 monthly membership. That gives you access to all the exclusive bonus content from all the shows over hundreds of hours of bonus content, only available to monthly subscriber members. What kind of stuff do we have coming down the pipe for our bonus content this year?

Yeah. members, what kind of stuff do we have coming down the pipe for our bonus content this year? Yeah, I mean, we already posted the first bit of bonus content. And what we're working on right now is a continuation of some of the bonus content that we've done in the past, which is the flop tails episodes where I force you guys to play a role-playing game with me. And we originally started as a crossover with the very popular adventure zone podcast. And then it's kind of spun off in its own stranger direction. And I have a couple more episodes ready to go. And I'm just hoping that we'll hit the Max Fund Drive target. Yeah, I don't want to backseat bonus content drive here, but I want to make it clear that

these extra episodes, these role-playing episodes that Stuart are talking about are bonuses that we're looking to do if we meet our goal of what is it 25,000 new or upgrading members. We have some bonus content out already for current donors or people who are donating this time around. And that is us talking about the legendary failed pilot Puchinsky about Peter Boil coming back as a dog cop. But we use the bonus stuff as an opportunity to do stuff that we don't normally do on our regular episodes, gives us a chance to take a breather. And we've already recorded a bunch of stuff in previous years. And if you're a max fund donor of $5 or more a month, you have access to like hundreds

and hundreds of hours of stuff from us and others. So that's the $5 monthly membership, but the really good stuff comes at a little bit more, $10 monthly membership. You get access to the bonus content, plus the exclusive to this drive your only enamel pin designed by Megan Linn Knot and you get to choose what show

you want the pin from. Megan Linn Knot, hot. What did I say? Oh, it's not. Sorry. Megan Linn Knot, Megan Linn Knot is. Tom. Just, what did I say? Oh, it's not. Sorry. Megan Lincot. Megan Lincot is, of course, a different person.

At $20. At the $20. Another person with no defining features, apparently. No. At $20 monthly membership, you get the bonus content. You get the pin and you get a 550 piece maximum fun puzzle designed specifically for max fun monthly members. Hey, you're looking for something to do with your hands and your eyes while you listen to a podcast. Maybe do the max fun puzzle. Okay. Yeah, start a plus club

and fucking do some Puzz. Yeah, call it a plus cast. Be all fuzzy about it. 35 dollar monthly membership. You get a glass coffee mug engraved with the max fun rocket logo. We love that logo plus all the proceeding bonus stuff. And there's some other, you know, I want you get a higher $50 $100 $200. You get even more stuff. There's a you get a special extra special metal membership card or you can be the maximum inner circle for $100. You can learn about that on the website. $200 monthly membership, you get free registration for max fund con 2020. That's all stuff. But where do people enjoy doing it the most? Well, in their bed at home.

But where do people enjoy donating the most for max fund? I feel like a lot of people go for the $10 monthly. The 20 is also popular. What's our pin look like this year, Dan? Why do I understand the $ $20 month first of all? I mean, please if you if you feel moved to give us $20 a month, but yes, also we should specify that this year's Pen and people love these and Amel pins This year's pen is the flop house house cat who is not saying

Rao, huh? Trade marketing like uh, Ra Rao. Uh huh. And what's pretty do trading like a, uh, uh, uh, a cat phrase, the flop house, the flop house. Uh huh. And it's, it's adorable. It is a door. It's a very norm core. It's a adorable norm core version of the house cat. It looks very much like my dearly departed cat Lulu, actually. Mm hmm. It's a Texito cat. Uh huh. Uh, so that's, so those are the gifts you could look forward to it. $10, the pen the pin five dollars the bonus content $20 a puzzle 35 dollars a glass coffee mug with the maximum logo and again when you go at the membership level You get all the the prizes for the lower levels that go along with it

It's all great stuff and that's if you donate and a monthly member and so here's how you do donate You go to maximumfund.org slash donate like we we said, it's like the membership level you write, you like looking to your heart, looking to your wallet, looking to your brain, figure out what's right for you, put in your credit card information, and the shows you listen to, beep, beep, beep, takes very little time.

Suddenly, you're a member, and those gifts are gonna come to you in the mail thanks to the US Postal Service. Thank you, US Postal Service, thank you Ben Franklin for being one of the founders of said Postal Service, and for making this possible. And why not celebrate that by donating $100? That's one Ben Franklin, right?

I don't know, whatever you want to do. Dan, do you want to talk a little bit about the Max Fun Drive? Oh, thank you for telling me up. I didn't know whether you're gonna do it or not. Oh. Well, I mean, we talked about me doing it earlier, so I figured I would.

Well Dan is rambling on. Now's a good time to go to maximumfund.org slash donate and choose the membership level that's right for you and provide your credit card information and your base information. Dan, continue to talk. Give them a sign that listen to you while they sign up. Look, we're up great.

So I don't want to bring anyone down. Uh huh. Uh, you don't? Cause that's kind of your thing. I don't want to bring anyone down. We love doing the show. We have a great time doing the show. We have a lot of fun.

It's a good excuse for us three as probably at this point, I would call us best friends getting in touch regularly, getting to see one another regularly. Best friends who turn down Stuart's invitation to watch a movie together. But yeah, okay. It's a good chance for us to stay close. It's a good chance for us to stay close. It's a good chance for us to talk. It's a good chance for us to put out something in the world for you people who enjoy, which we love.

But I will be honest, it gets tough sometimes. It gets harder as the years go by to find the time, to set aside, to record the podcast, to edit the podcast, to like the bigger the podcast get, the more it's like a second business that we all have to kind of run together. So it makes it good if we get money for it. That's true. Yeah. Money equals we can put time into the podcast that you like.

Yeah. And we can do extra stuff like touring. I just want to mention quickly, I said something about it last week. We are touring this summer and fall, June 8th, Portland, July 13th, Minneapolis, September 28th, Boston, October 12th, Los Angeles. You can find out about that on the website. We won't waste a lot of time on that because the max fund drive

But that's the sort of thing that having money can let us do. Yep So it's good to have as as well as you know to feed us, clothe us, um Houses keep Archie and then my multiple cats in food and clothes Yeah, and my children. Oh, yeah Yeah, them too. Yeah. So yeah, that's the max fun drive. Please show us your support. We'll talk a little bit more about it again at the end of the episode. But take any time you want during this episode to go to maximumfund.org slash donate. Take what kind of membership level you want to go at and

just give us your information and just be a part of the fun that is supporting maximum fun and being a member. There's a lot of great stuff about it. I don't want to tell you all of it because if you're not a member already, you don't deserve to know. And if you are a member already, then you already know how amazing it is. And you don't need me wasting your time telling you. So let's talk about it more later at the end of the episode, maximum fun drive, donate now, maximum fun, dot org slash donate. Dan, what do we do next? I'm the regular episode next. We talk to you via the medium of email, specifically you email us and we talk back to you.

Uh huh, letters we call it. It's our classic segment email talk back. This first letter is from, let's see, Taj last name withheld. Who writes? I finally got round to see one of Elliott's favorite films, This first letter is from, let's see, Taj last name withheld. Who writes? I finally got round to see one of Elliott's favorite films, Tarsing Sings of the Fall. I was shocked to find an Elliott suggestion

that had been made in the last 70 years, however, as the film is said in 1915 and features silent movies, it makes sense why it gets the Kaelin seal of approval. Hardy, Har Har. I... Well, well, well. Okay. I get a lot of, I get a lot of guff about having 11 old movies, but now he's gone too far.

You know why? Why? Yeah. Because I needed attention. I'm sorry guys, I shouldn't have interrupted. Damn, good. Okay. I enjoyed watching it.

There was a charming child performance at his core and some stunning images. There was an unevenness there too, which reminded me of Terry Gilliam's work. It's just fucking letterbox now. What's going on here? It reminded me of Terry Gilliam's work and I wondered how the former Python might have approached the fall. I suspect there would have been more comedy and even more chaos. I then started really wishing for a Guillermo Diltoro version. My questions are these. You have any films that you'd like to see directed by someone else? If yes, which films by whom and why? Bonus question. I've recently bought Elliot's excellent horse meets dog to read

to my son. I decided that I'm going to try a John Gilgood voice for horse, but in a live Gilgood naturally. And Alan coming for dog. Who would you cast in the rules? Oh wait, which question should we talk about first? Well, I don't know. I forgot the first one already. It's, it's movies directed by different directors. Oh, okay. I'll just say it right here. I'll just say right now. Pedro M. O'Dovar's Jurassic Park.

Mm-hmm. Trophy's reasons. Yeah, yeah. No need to say anything else. Don't need to Jurassic Park. Probably. Yeah. Yeah. No need to say anything else. Don't need to explain it. That's what I want to say. Probably couldn't. Yeah. I mean, I guess that's, I guess I would probably make more people happy than Mike Lee's Jurassic

Park. Mike Lee's Jurassic Park is entirely just like semi-impervised conversations among the marketing team over what they're going to name this dinosaur park. Dan Stewart, do you have any ideas? Movies you'd like to see directed by other people? It's always tough for me to think about, to take a movie and then just have a completely different director do it because it's hard to say how much impact the original director had on what I liked about the original. Are we talking about just, I mean, not to ask the rules or anything, but like, if it's just like a different person starts from the screenplay and works their way up, I guess.

I don't know, like, I'm a big fan of, I'd mentioned previously, many moons ago when I talked about, when I talked about the, the human centipede, how much I would have preferred that movie if it had been directed by Stewart Gordon, because the Stewart Gordon, much more so than Tom Sixx seems to understand, well, how to make a good movie. And also, how to make how to make like body horror and physical horror so and gore so physically revolting. And I think that would have made that movie a little more effective, as opposed to not effective. But it's tough. Like outside of that, just saying like, I would like to see more kind of boring, normal Oscar fair directed by weirder directors like I would have much preferred. Uh, I don't know.

Like, feel like David Kronenberg doesn't get to direct enough movies. So, uh, I guess more movies directed by. So like Bohemian Rhapsody directed by David Kronenberg? I mean, I feel like if you completely changed the direct, I mean, changing the director in Bohemian Rhapsody is the minimum thing you can do to fix that movie. I mean, it is something they actually did during the production of the film now. I think about it.

Yeah. So let's say, let's say, let's say, David Cronerberg's green book. I don't know about that. I didn't see it and I don't play. I'd assume then that and I don't like to. I'd assume then that the book would become like a, like some kind of a portal to an alternate universe or something like that, you know.

Yeah, it's bound with human skin or something. I mean, isn't the ultimate body horror, the horror that people judge each other by their physical appearances and their bodies rather than what's inside them, Dan. Pfft. Sure. So is that the ultimate horrible thing that people do?

Yes, I'll, I know, you're really bumbling this bounce bass, Dan. Well, it's a question I was not prepared to answer. And I get the feeling that Elliot is doing it as a joke to make himself seem extra like, you know, like cool. Not at all. Not at all. Okay. I'm just saying, look, it's easy for us to escape into realms of grotesquery rather than grappling with the real problems of humanity. That's all the thing. I mean, that's 100% me.

That's 100% me. Yeah. Yeah. To answer the question, that's not Elliott's question. Yeah. So I didn't really think about this that much despite getting this email early on and forwarding it to you guys. So why would you? No, why would I?

You would be falling asleep while watching Pepper. A podcast or a chord. We're busy falling asleep while watching Pepper. And a podcast to record. So the things that occur to me most foremost are movies that were taken away from their original director and how I would rather say the original director do it. Like it's a better way to put it in front of a man or Lord and Miller doing solo. Like I would have preferred seeing those versions. Or Brian Singer with Bohemian rap.

Uh-huh. No, um, did not say that. Uh, but for other movies, let's just say Joe Dante gets to do all of them. Yeah. The Joe, Joe Dante's green book. Yeah. Uh, do you have anything, Elliot? Yeah.

Pedro Maldonovar's Jurassic Park. I said it already. All right. Well, that's what we want. I mean, anytime you can, anytime you could have a, Elliot? Yeah, Pedro Maldonovar's Jurassic Park. He said it already. All right, well then that's what we want. Anytime you can, anytime you could have a, I mean, similarly to like you're saying, these kind of like middle of the road, kind of like mainstream movies

to having more interesting people doing them, I would love for people to, the thing that they always gets promised where it's like, oh, this franchise is gonna have someone with a unique vision takeover and that rarely actually happens. Except for like Alfonso Cuadón's Harry Potter movie. Yeah, kind of.

Or like, I would love to see like, I don't know, people do like James Bond movies who are not regular James Bond people or something like that. They're so, or like Godzilla movies. Like, there's so many of them already. We've established the default norm that we can, that now they can move off of that and go into other directions, you know, but they rarely do. Elliott nostalgia is very important to people and people don't actually want to be surprised by the thing that they love.

That's a fair point actually. That's a good point. Okay. Uh, let's move on. Uh huh. Do a different letter that I will look at right now. Wow. Wow. So remember, everybody, think about how great the flop house is and donate the amount of

money you think goes with that. I didn't just click on the flop house episode. I was looking at something ragged to your old recycling bin. I was looking at I was looking at something related to the show. Then I'm talking sooner than I thought. So I needed to flip back to the right tap poor gasoline all over that computer. Then light it on fire. Get rid of the flop house.

Okay. So put just put in drill up to your head and prepare yourself so that the memories of this episode flow out the hole in your skull. Christine last name with held rights. For a car. Hey, Flippity Flappers. I've been seeing a lot of my favorite shows or movies getting the reboot treatment. Uh-huh.

I would love to see more of these worlds. I feel a disconnect with the new interpretations of the material. Either it feels tonally off to the source, or it's just a retelling of an already fleshed out arc with a new cast. I'm not against remakes, but it seems like when a story has reached an end point, we could go elsewhere with the plot. For example, with talks of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot, I would refer to see a series about a different slayer in the Buffy verse.

Like Nikki Reed, Kendra, or having older Buffy become a watcher, training a younger slayer. But having a- What about if it was a fish and it was orange ruffy the Buffy the Vampire Slayer? I was certainly worth stopping a literal. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. Um, so I mean, I will say one of the things that I like about the new Star Wars movies is that they are shedding the old characters, uh-huh, and moving on from them. Like I would as much as I enjoy the old Star Wars movies and love them, I would like nothing more than for them to stop talking about the Skywalker family. Yeah.

And you have to let the, let the past die. You must kill it. Exactly. Uh, I think that is, did not do this as well. I think we're the JJ Abrams Star Trek movies, where I got so mad that the second movie was just ended up being a redo of the con story. And I was like, can we not do like new stories?

I know it's not exactly the same thing, because it's not totally new leads, although it would be interesting to me to have new types of characters in those two, but like to just like do a remake of literally a story from before seems like a waste of opportunity. Come up with a new story, you know, or do a remake of Star Trek V, my favorite one. Well, it makes, it kind of reminds me of how like Dark Horse comics was doing all those branded like aliens and predator comics for a while and

they seem the comics seem to handle that stuff so much better than the eventual movies did. Um, I mean this doesn't directly answer the question because I have trouble thinking of a remake uh, or a property that had been remade that I cared enough about either part, I don't know. But the, I guess what I'm trying to say is, yeah, I like, I'd like to see something more like the way that Matt Wagner handled his Grindel comics and his Grindel characters where he, after like the first Hunter Rostoff wrapped up, he just kind of went in weirder in stranger directions and took kind of the essence of the character or even just the look of the character and made weird, strange little sci-fi comics out of them and handed off to other creators.

Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, exactly. Instead of it just being the continuing adventures of Hunter Rose and then his granddaughter. Or, and his granddaughter just going through, cycling through the exact same things basically. Yeah, that it then became, using the theme of, I guess, like the trouble of this spirit of violence and that corrupts humanity,

that it then became this, yeah, some bizarre stories and that then the idea of a Grendel as a thing became the unifying element. I think that's a good way to put it, yeah. And I would like to see fewer, you know, lazy reboots like this mystery science theater through thousand of the return. That just very brave.

And it really hashes the whole, the old format with new characters, not even fully new characters. You're right, Richard. But you would rather have a scene. I would like to see the adventures of Kambot, the whole the old format with with new characters not even fully new characters. You're right, Richard. What you would, what you would rather have seen is. I would like to see the adventures of Cambot grappling with what it's like to be a camera that's also a robot. Yeah, I mean, that's, that's pretty, pretty good idea.

They could call it Cam and it would be about, I don't know, somebody who makes their living by being videotaped. Yeah. Go on. I'll take these ideas to Joel and I'll see what he says about them. He's a young guy, you can probably roll with it, right? You've always felt that the best thing about Mr. Science Theater is when they're not watching

the movie and I respect you for that. I actually really like the host segments. I know that they're always like deeply, deeply stupid, but that's what I respond to. Wow, Dan gave up on the bit really fast. No, I'm honestly saying, I've never understood people who are like, I really like Mr. Science Theater, but I don't like, you know, when they're not watching the movie.

Mm-hmm. That's crazy. Well, it's the same. I mean, that's such a lesser version of the people were like, I love Star Wars. I fucking hate the Star Wars movies. And it's like, I don't know, hold on a second. I don't understand what you like anymore. Yeah. What is what's your deal? Should we move on to the final letter? Yeah, yeah, why not? Okay, this is from Aiden last name withheld. Hey, there guys. Oh, God. Strikes me that. this is from Aiden last name with held. Mm-hmm. Hey there guys

Oh, yeah, this is a very special episode that hasn't had a song yet So let's have a special song for this final letter It's gonna be the better letter this last one because I'm sure Dan thought about it ahead of time and Organize them precisely to save the best letter for last. It certainly doesn't seem like Dan that he might just take three random letters and throw them in whatever order they happen to arrive in or maybe the order that they were already in in his inbox that wouldn't be like Dan. Dan puts in extra effort all the time.

He certainly does and falls asleep in the movies or forget what later we're doing next or maybe what the question was. So Dan, hey, give us this amazing final letter that ties together all the threads that you've laid up to this point in some magical mystery way that reveals to us today This intricate design that we call the flop house. Don't eat now Okay, last last letter. Thanks. Aiden last name with held writes Too stew that's me which movies pair best with your favorite beers to Elliot I know that you have a strong interest interest in the presidency of a certain vampire hunter.

But are there other particular periods of world history that intrigue you? And are there any good, great movies about them too? To Dan, you aren't the Leonardo of the group. You're the splinter. I know that wasn't a question, but I asked Elliot too. So I get to sit back, question, but I asked Elliott to. So I get to sit back, relax, and not answer this. So still movies and beers? Oh, I, uh, I mean, based on my beer consumption when watching movies lately, I've been going through a

lot of, uh, the other half green city IPA, which is a nice juicy, East Coast IPA. And I drink that every time I'm at the movies, whether it's a movie that allows me to drink beer or not. I was so, it's the movie that's allowing you to drink beer, or not? Yeah, yeah. I asked the movie, everyone in the crowd yells at me,

but I wait for the movie to respond. They never do Pardon me the favorite Other half beer and the favorite didn't was Said nothing to me. I was left there just wondering and wanting Similar to the characters of the favorite. Excuse me, call me by your name. Can I call you by my name while I'm drinking a beer? Or is that not okay? Uh-huh, they're like, well, I'm glad you use our name as part of the question. That's impressive. So, so, a favorite movie to drink, to drink a beer to all of them.

Onto my question. Yeah, I mean, that's 100% me though, right? Like I've already made that pretty clear. I, there's never been a movie that I've watched that I didn't wanna be drinking during it. Yeah, Elliot's distracted by something. So, let's talk about, Elliot's googling help centers to call, okay.

Yeah, Elliot, does Stuart have a problem? Oh, here on a. Early, it's Googling help centers to call that. Really? Does Stuart have a problem? Oh, here on Quora, it says no. Okay. They crowdsourced it. I'll say other periods in world history that I'm particularly interested in. It's hard to find a period in world history that I am not interested in. They're all pretty interesting. It's taken me until my adulthood to really get into Medieval Europe, which I was not so

interested in when I was younger, but now I am. But great good movies. That's a good question. Look, if you're interested in feudal Japan, there's a ton of different movies to watch. Go watch Seven Samurai. Go watch Kill. Though there's tons of good samurai movies, so maybe sort of from there. Sort of vengeance.

Sort of do my mistakes. Sort of do, yeah. If it's a sword, it's probably good. Sort of vengeance or sort of sort of do my mistake. If it's a sword, it's probably good. But there's also like if you're interested in kind of, kind of pre-civil war America, this isn't exactly about that history, but the movie The Devil and Daniel Webster

is a favorite of mine and that, and it's kind of like if they made a scary movie about the period of American like the 18, you know, uh, oh, are they still making scary movies? Why? I mean, how many of them? I mean, scary movies. Uh-huh, like five. There's made like five or six of them.

Yeah. And I would say a period in world history that people find really boring, but it's not, is ancient Rome. And this is not a movie recommendation, but I would say Go Read I Claudius by Robert Graves. It's a great book. I actually have never seen the mini series that they made of it, which I've heard it.

All lots is really good. But that's a book where it really turns me around on ancient Rome, where it was hard for me to keep straight any of the history of Rome in my head, and I read Iclatius, and I was like, oh yeah, the secret is they were all individuals and all different people.

So, they'll watch that. Or if I watch, I mean, look at it with your eyes, and then read it. It's like a form of watch. Yeah, basically. All right, so let's get on to the final segment. Real quick before we get into that final segment, I just want to relay a little bit of information,

okay, passed on from my buddy Max. I want to give a quick shout out and a congratulations to Flapp House listener, Daniel LaSpada, for winning his election for Chicago's first ward and being elected alderman. Congratulations, sir. Okay. Now what do we do? All right.

Well, thanks for that. I forget. Well, we recommend movies. Recommendations. Dan, come on. All right. I'm going to let you in on a little scene. I was here's what I do before every episode.

Uh-huh. I write up a document with all the things I need to remember for that episode. Yeah. Things that are not that hard to remember, but maybe you could have a helper or thing like this. Yeah. We write it down. Uh huh. I mean, Daniel's in Daniel's defense, I threw him a curve ball.

I was busy thinking like, is this someone that we want to politically endorse or are they good or the bad? I don't know anything about them, but congratulations to them as a listener definitely anyway yeah he he won his he won on the American Nazi party flat. Yeah most likely I did literally no questioning or research and just blindly recommended somebody yeah right Dan that sounds like me idiot okay well. A lot of attacks on Dan this episode, but. And I don't know why. You've been at peak efficiency in peak performance

all episode. It's similar to how King Kong was climbing so high and he's got higher and higher. More planes kept showing up. I feel like I woke up for the parts of this episode where we're asking for money. No, you're great. So this is where we recommend movies

that we watched recently. Hey guys, I haven't seen a lot recently so I'm gonna recommend something pretty obvious. I hope Stuart wasn't already gonna recommend it. But I went on a SawCaptain Marvel. I liked it a lot. It was good. I like those Marvel movies in general. Yeah.

To me, this was sort of down the middle when it comes to all Marvel movies, but I was really happy to enjoy it. I mean, but as like, as I think Scott DeVice was saying on the, on the, what's the book and show they do, on the last picture show, he was, he mentions that like, or he puts out the idea that Marvel movies, the difference between the worst Marvel movie and the best Marvel movie, is pretty small. Yeah.

So like right down the middle is pretty good. Yeah, I mean, also considering that I have pretty much enjoyed all of them to some degree or another. I, you know, like, possible exception one or two, but, you were saying that Ed Norton Hulk really like satisfied you with other movies haven't. Yeah, the Norton Hulk and the Thor the Dark World, maybe not so much, but every one of the other ones

I would give a recommend to. So to say it's down the middle is good praise. And I was very happy to see that it made a ton of money proving the internet trolls wrong who just hated I guess the idea of a woman in charge of a superhero movie. So it's good, it's very fun and it's like a fun 90s buddy comedy between Breelars and Sam Jackson for most of the part of it, which is something I very much enjoyed. Yeah Somebody's finally mining that rich vein of 90s nostalgia Give me some no doubt in that soundtrack

That podcast that scutipized on is the next picture show Jesus Christ. I'm an idiot No, it's you know, but so it's okay You know, he's just you know, I think he's a listener, so he probably won't be upset at all. No, I know, and like, I listen to his podcast, I just know like, remember stuff very well. I think we've covered. Yeah.

So I'll look forward to the first little indie film. Yeah, Captain Marvel. Yeah, hopefully, hopefully your support will help make it some money. And I'll push it over the top. Cool. I'm going to recommend a little movie called, wait for it called the Wailing. This is a Korean movie. I'm not going to mention anything.

I like Moby Dick. Yep. It's a kind of lengthy, I would almost call it epic, small horror movie, just based on the length. But it's this beautiful movie about a stranger showing up in a isolated village and all of a sudden a strange kind of sickness starts spreading around and a variety of other strange happenings. And we follow a kind of kind of do-fe police officer who is trying to make sense out of what's going on. And he also is trying to hold his family together. And it is a kind of moving,

it's a moving and beautiful movie that is also strange and scary at times. I totally recommend it. It's called The Wailing. Oh, I was not familiar with it. And looking up now, it was made by the same director who made the chaser. Yeah, yeah, which is good.

Yeah, okay, which is good. Yeah. Okay, that's good. And I'm going to recommend a little movie because we're doing little movies today. This is a movie that is not going to, it's not going to change your life. It's called, it's called Little Stuart Little. It's about Stuart Little when he was a baby. There's a Nick Park who created Walson Gromit came out with a movie last year called Early Man, that kind of came and went. And I can understand why it did.

It's essentially the story of cavemen having a soccer competition. But we watched it just the other week with my son. We've instituted now Friday night is movie night where he gets to watch a movie before he goes to bed. How many of those how many of those movies are cars three? We have put a limit on how many times we can watch the cars movie. Yeah.

This is for a while. It's movie night. What do you want to watch? Cars. No, we're not watching cars three. No, we're not watching cars three tonight. But he's a big fan of Walson Gromit, my son, as of course, everyone with love in their heart is.

And I didn't know, an early man kind of came and went, I hadn't heard much about it, and we were like, we'll give it a shot. And it was just really funny. Which shouldn't have surprised me. Like it has a lot of the art man animation, inventiveness to it.

The story is just kind of, whatever. It's cavemen who want, it's the same old story of cavemen trying to save the valley from invaders by having a soccer competition with them. But it's just a really funny, fun movie and I enjoyed a lot and I recommend it for families to watch. Right.

Okay. Three family recommendation. Yeah, I guess so. I know. Well, depends on how cool your family is, dudes. You got Dan. You got him on that one. Yeah. Okay. Now that we've got all that business out of the way, guys, let's talk about something fun. You got Dan. You got him on that one. Yeah. Okay.

Now that we've got all that business out of the way, guys, let's talk about something fun. Oh, yeah, that's right. We're talking about the Max fund pledge drive. This is our last break. I just wanted to hammer home that the Max fund being part of the Max fund network is a huge deal for us. It was really.

It was. It was kind of like a career milestone for us when we were invited and we were, we joined the network. It feels like we're part of a family and through listening to Max Von shows and interacting with both Max Von listeners and the hosts of the other programs. I feel like I've become a better person. And I like to think that a lot of that has to do with Max Fun. And I think that's an organization that's worth supporting and our shows are all worth supporting. So if you have a little bit of spare income and you'd like to support a bunch of cool shows and you'd like to

support the entertainment that helps get you through the day. Please consider either donating or if you're already a listener and you can afford it and you'd like some of the cool gifts, why not upgrade? Dan, why are you soul, Dan. I was very touched by what Stuart was saying. And Dan is meanwhile just like snickering through all that. He's like a middle school kid at an assembly about bullying. And he's just like, no, it was a very nice thing that was said and it was all true. I just, at some point, I don't remember.

Dan looked over and on my notebook, I'm just writing 69 over and over, like a mad man. No, for some reason, I suddenly imagined you going, if you've got a song in your heart and a dollar in your pocket, don't answer maximum fun. That would be weird for me to say. That would, it does sound like the thing he would say too, yeah. I'd like to say when it comes to the Max Fun Drive, like doing the flop house is something that's very important to me. And I'm always touched by people who take something out of it

that helps them in their lives, even if it's just having a silly thing to listen to. It's been very helpful to me to have a source of income that I can rely on that helps supplement what is a pretty uneven lifestyle, which by which I mean being an entertainment and not having a steady year round job. So I really appreciate that

and something that I've come to rely on quite a bit. But Max Fun is not just about our show, although our show is important to us and hopefully meaningful to you in some way. It's about a family of shows. Nay, a galaxy of shows. Actually, no, Nay, let's go back to family of shows. That sounds better because when you donate to us, you're also donating to the network.

The network helps support a lot of different voices and a lot of different people who now have access to a wider audience and now can be a part of this family that we're all in. And I wanted to take a moment to thank our existing members. You really make it very possible for us to do this and we're very glad that you have shown that support for us when you don't have to. You could listen to this show for free. You could say, hey,

ex-naleous. Walnuts, buddy. Cram it with walnuts. I'm gonna take this for nothing and I don't want anything to give back, but a lot of people have said, no, ex-nail you. Walnuts, but a cram it with walnuts. I'm gonna take this for nothing and I don't want anything to give back, but a lot of people have said, no, I don't wanna do that. I don't wanna basically be, let's just say scum

for all those free riders. That might be a little harsh, but there, I wanna thank the people who have already been supporting us who are not scum. And I wanna say that if you like your current membership level, just like stick with it, and we would really appreciate that. If you want to upgrade, we'd appreciate it. So much, we would still appreciate that and like,

you don't need to do it, but it would just be really meaningful. And we have that goal of 25,000 for the whole network, new or upgrading members, and that'll help us to do more. It'll help Max Fun to do more. Like Dan said, things like travel are things that we can do because the flop house has this money from members in its coffers that we can use to pay for stuff like airplanes and hotels and one steak dinner, a trip, which we didn't get to do in Wisconsin,

which was kind of a bone of contention for me that I was really looking forward to just sitting down and eating steak with my buds and we didn't get to do that. But you know, whatever, Dan needed to go out and hang out with people. Sure, that's fine. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah, make fun of me while we're asking for money, make fun of me for wanting to hop knob with listeners.

But this is like when we were first asked to, well, when we talked to Max Fun about it and they agreed to let us be part of their network, I didn't realize what a strong community we were gonna be a part of and how many friends I was gonna make from it and what a real feeling of like togetherness and just connection, we were gonna get from it. And so I appreciate it personally, I know we all do in everyone in Max Fun does, when our listeners become part of that community too

by helping us to keep going and supporting us. So we really appreciate it. Again, if you can go to maximumfund.org slash donate and select the membership level that feels right for you, credit card information, your basic information about shows, and that's all it takes. And then you can say as you walk around in your daily life,

Hey, I'm more than just one of these regular people, Max Fun Donor. I'm a member of the Max Fun family, because like Stewart has seen real, you know, like he was saying, changes in his thinking and being, I think I felt a little bit of that too. And it's just been like a really rewarding,

wonderful place to be a part of. And please help us to continue to be a part of it and help us to keep going. We really appreciate it. And on a slightly less personal note, but an important note, we sort of addressed it briefly before, but selecting the shows that you listen to

means that the money that you give goes directly to supporting the shows that you like, which I think is a very important thing that for listeners to know that if they're giving money, it's going to go to the entertainment that they are specifically interested in, you know, some of it goes to general operating costs as it should. But the rest goes directly to us, the podcast creators. And after listening to this episode, if you're already a donor, you can just go in there and remove the flop house, because we're a terrible. To leave. To set it to zero for the flop house.

I think I would say that knowing this is a max one drive episode, I felt a little bit of extra pressure and might have buckled under that pressure slightly. And Stuart did a great job summarizing. And Dan, of course, did his usual, I don't know what he does with his time or with his energy, but that's... Sure, that's right. That's fine. I only started the podcast, but it's cool, whatever. Oh, yeah. Okay. I will. This is this might be getting too personal, but also like working as a creative person. And I don't know if Dan feels this way.

The and Stewart is also creative person, but his profession is not based explicitly in it. So I don't know if he's the same thing. I find myself doing a lot of work. And this is going to sound woe is me for working on TV shows and stuff. I find myself doing a lot of work and this is going to sound woe is me for working on TV shows and stuff. I find myself doing a lot of work where I am present. I am using my abilities to get someone else's message across or get someone else's idea across and to have something like the flop house where I can point to it and I can say,

that's me and Dan and Stewart. The things that people like about it, that's me and Dan and Stewart. The things people don't like about it, that's still me and Dan and Stewart. The things that people like about it, that's me and Dan and Stewart. The things people don't like about it, that's still me and Dan and Stewart. Like we can take credit, we can take blame, but it's our thing and we can point to it and say, that's ours. It's not anybody else's

and we're not working for anybody else. It's something that's very special to me and the Max Fund Drive is really what makes that possible because it means that we can carve out the time in our busy lives and I can justify to my family sitting downstairs for a couple hours talking to Dan and Stewart about peppermint. Well, my wife takes care of both of our children because Max von Donors make it practical, but

on an emotional level, I know it's very meaningful to me to have a thing where I can point to and I can say, that's Dan and Stewart's in mind, it's nobody else's, and that provides something for my soul that's very necessary. So thank you to everybody for making that possible. Please help us continue to make that possible. Yeah, I mean, this is broadcast to the world. So my official position as a person who's employed regularly is that my job is wonderful

and I have no complaints. But as- Are you unofficial? As a human being, my message is, thank you for keeping me sane by allowing me to have a thing that is my creative endeavor and not me putting words in someone else's mouth. Yeah. Yeah, what you guys said. All right.

Well, I guess that is the most elegant way to sum everything up. So thank you for listening. Thank you for hopefully donating. Maximumfund.org slash donate. And while you're at Maximumfund.org, you can check out other shows, obviously. Yeah, tons of great content. Keep on tweeting about us. Keep on rating us on iTunes.

But for now, we should say goodbye. And I'm saying goodbye, and my name is Dan McCoy. I'm also saying goodbye, and my name is Stuart Lenton Wellington. I'm saying goodbye, and I'm also saying going to MaximumFund.org, slash donate and donate some more

of great your membership or whatever I don't know. But I'm saying goodbye mostly, and my name is Elliot Charles Kaelin II. See ya, bye! And Dan, you just sit back, be a regular self. Just kind of be bemused at the whole thing. Okay, thanks. And eventually, Chordle. And that's how we know you're here.

And thank you. Wow, that's an accurate representation of Dan's performance sometimes. Burr. Burr. I'm just getting Dan here in an integral. Hey. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Somehow a harsher burn.

Hey hey hey. Maximumfund.org. Somehow a harsher burn.