The Flop House - Ep. #357 - Santa Claus: The Movie, with Alonso Duralde

Episode Date: December 4, 2021

The jolly bearded man himself, Alonso Duralde, writer of Have Yourself a Movie Little Christmas and co-host of Max Fun's own Maximum Film, as well as many, many other things, joins us to talk about the LEGENDARILY strange 1985 would-be Christmas blockbuster Santa Claus: The Movie, along with the usual shenanigans.Wikipedia entry for Santa Claus: The MovieMovies recommended in this episode:Licorice PizzaBlade of the ImmortalClimate of the HunterOriginal Cast Album: CompanyThe Last of Sheila

On this episode we discuss Santa Claus, the movie, not to be confused with Santa Claus, the sandwich. Perfect, love it. Hey everyone, welcome to the flop pass, I'm Dan McCoy. Whoa, rolling right in, it's me, Stuart Wellington. And rolling on over, it's Elliot Kaylen, and we've got a special guest with us today. That's right. Joining us as he now does every year, I'm gonna say, as our holiday,

Dudley Moore correspondent, it's the esteemed and brilliant Alonzo Duralde, film reviews editor at the rap, co-author of Albe Home for Christmas Movies, and an incredibly prolific podcast host he'll talk about those more later on Alonzo. Thanks so much for joining us and continuing on the Dudley Moore holiday's beat. I've been delighted to be back.

I think this might be the only other Dudley Moore Christmas movie. So I guess goodbye everybody. No, we'll get him to make some more. Well, it looks bad, you're purview a little bit for. Oh, really? I have some bad news for you. But I want Dudley Moore. You're purview a little bit for. Oh, yeah, that's bad news for you. I mean, I want Dudley Moore. You're saying I'm going to get Dudley less? In a way, from a certain perspective, 10 could be. Yeah, yeah. I mean, the last last last year is also was a marginally holiday movie since it was really much more about a young girl, a dying

young girl trying to get her mom laid by Dudley Moore, yeah. Where's this movie takes on one of the most Christmassy things there is? Santa Claus, it purports to be the movie of that, yeah. Not A, though. Well, name another one, name another. Well, it was so funny, because everyone who is asking me about this,

they're like, what movie are you doing this time? We go, Santa Claus, the movie, and they're like, yeah, with Tim Allen, I'm like, no, no, no, that's the Santa Claus with an E at the end. Now Colin the movie. Not Colin the movie. And you have to imagine that for years they were like, we got it, there's no other Santa Claus

the movie, this is the only Santa Claus movie. They were wrong about that. There are other Santa Claus movie. There's like that classic 1959 Mexican one that they do on mystery science theater one. Santa Claus. Just Santa Claus, but this is, And there's like that classic 1959 Mexican one that they do on mystery science theater one to close. Just Santa Claus. But this is cold in the movie, let it be known

throughout the land. You do think they did that so that people looking past the marquees, wouldn't think Santa was there making public appearances? Yeah. Well, I mean, we will get into this, but this is produced by the the Salcons, Alexander and Ilya. And they had just come off of the great success of Superman the movie. So I think that maybe the the Salcons, Alexander and Ilya, and they had just come off of the great success of

Superman the movie. So I think that maybe the thought was like, we own those two words. And so when people see the movie, they're going to know it's a Salcon joint. That explains why they sued the makers of Hot Dog the movie. Exactly. This is a very good film. On this note too, I want to say that this movie, the director, also did Supergirl, which we covered with Lin Weldon, if you want to check out other podcasts about this director's work. And it was written by, I mean, we'll talk about this podcast as I'm going, but we'll have

you should mention this movie was written by David Newman, who had a pretty, started off with a bang. It started off a pretty amazing career until Superman 2. And then it was like all downhill, as far as I could tell from there. He went from writing Bonnie and Clyde and Bed Company, which is a really good underrated movie. And what's up doc?

To writing like, Shina Santa Claus, the movie, Moonwalker, which is not really a movie. Like it's a video collection with it. With a thin wrap on. He then he became a postal worker and he was always bothering Jerry Seinfeld, right? Yeah, yeah.

Well, that's he was so angry about his Hollywood career of crashing that he. And I also had a line of salad dressings, but it didn't really quite take off. Yeah, yeah, but they were his own. They were nobody else. They were absolutely. I said, I'm tired of having my great screenplays

ruined by producers. These salad dressings won't have any meddling in them. They're my own only. So, Dan, he you of course, would put his face on the salad dressing. And sometimes if the salad dressing had, I don't know, like a flavor that was not his, from his culture, it would seem a little bit racist. And you're like, right, by this or not, am I going to look bad? Yeah. Oh, is this my sash problematic? You wanted me to describe the podcast. Yeah, let's say what are we doing this podcast other than just jumping into Santa Claus

the movie? This is a podcast where we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it. I would say, you know, 70 to 80% of the time, a newer bad movie, but often when we have guests, we like to, you know, do their favorite movie about time. Do their favorite movie about time. I was gonna say, like, you know, follow their passions, their expertise, but take their passion and make it happen is what you're saying.

Yeah, exactly. So this is from the mid 80s, this one, because yes, again, it starts Dudley Moore, a man who's no longer with us. So that's clue number one. Yeah, in blues clues. I mean, but it also it also starts David Huddleston who is alive and went, oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, no, no.

Has anything happened to John Liffgaugh? Is he okay? I know he's fine. He is alive and shit talking this movie as well. He showed. Yeah, although I'll just he is I feel like he's the one thing that he comes out of this say he is, I feel like he's the one thing that works as a movie. He comes out of this movie looking good and I feel like David Huddleston does too. Like he's just, he's just Santa Claus and he's just doing Santa Claus things.

And. And the pantheon of screen Santas, like say what you will about this movie and we're about to for the next hour, but David Huddleston is Santa in his heart out. Yeah. Like who you may know as the big Lebowski, the, the, the angry older Lebowski, who, who yells at Jeff Bridges and throws him out of his office. Really. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, grumpy guys make great Santas, Paul Geomatti and four Santas Ed Asner over and over and over again. So, you know, I think the, I think the, the jolly

and the, er, like really coexist in the great act. Yeah, it's the, it's the Yin and Yang of Santos is there equally both gruff and lovable. David Helsen, you may remember also from Blazem Saddles, he's the one who says, oh, blow it out your ass, Howard. When, when Heather Johnson says, you know, Nietzsche says that if chaos comes order, and he says, oh, blow it out your ass, Howard. Anyway, so this, this movie, it stars those big name stars. I was just reading right here that there were a lot of bigger name stars.

They were hoping to land for this movie, but maybe I'll bring that casting possible possibilities up as we get to their roles. Well, okay. So the movie begins with the title hell. Yeah. And then we have 10 minutes of staring at a boring sky with Christmas music playing in the background. Eventually it pans down to the planet Earth and we hear a voiceover from a granny introducing

kind of the concept of, I feel like the North Pole and like gift giving or some shit. Yeah. What she's talking about also, there's little people who live at the North Pole called Vendiggums, and almost instantly will meet them. They go, we prefer to be called elves. So, why are we wasting all this time with Vendigums, Dan? Yeah, and also this, I mean, it's very clear that this comes from people who are involved

in the Superman movies. Like this feels like, they're like, oh, what's another superhero out in the world? Sannical. They're like, who's a superhero that we don't have to pay for? Who's a public domain hero? Dracula?

Tarzan? A little look into it. No, Tarzan's not available right now. It starts in the sky and then launches into an origin story. It's also the thing that I loved about this is knowing that, like, so the saw kinds who made this were Jewish, or at least the dad of the two.

It's very much like, all right, we're making a Santa Claus movie, not something we have personal experience with. So let's figure it out. What's our explanation for this Santa Claus thing? So the granny looks a little bit like Rosemary Harris is explaining this story to a bunch of bored urchins who are sitting around a big cabin with their parents.

And this is like the Middle Ages. This is a long time ago. Yeah, and then like a Santa like guy shows up on a sleigh pulled by a pair of reindeer. And he gives the kids a bunch of toys that are basically just like little statues that he's carved. And the kids are clearly kind of bummed that it isn't like a Funko pop or some shit.

Yeah. They're like, oh, look, there's no points of articulation on this. And he's like, we don't have ball bearing technology yet. I can't play Animal Crossing on this. They're like, well, how collectible is this? Should I keep it in the package? So this dude, Mr. Claus and his gal go on a snowy sleigh ride while torturing his reindeer. And then the reindeer collapse and then they all basically decide that they're going to die and the snow covers

their lifeless bodies. The sleigh will be their headstone, the ground their tomb. Yeah, this is like seven minutes into the movie and Santa Claus is essentially dying. So he may be reborn, but still. Yeah, as Christian teaching tells us Santa died only to be reborn. Yeah. Well, and later on, he's referred to as the chosen one, which is crazy. Yeah. Well, and heaven knows there's no mention of Jesus in this story, so they can totally sort of merge those two legends together with Willie Nile as it were.

It's they go, they go to such lengths to de-religify Christmas, which is a very religious holiday as far as I can tell. And they like, there's no mention of Jesus and throughout the movie, they keep going, all children everywhere love Christmas. On this night, every child in the world will get a toy. I'll visit all of them and it's like, that's not, if we know that's not the case.

Like we know Santa is pretty hard right on this and is not interested in giving to kids outside of his community, you know. But they, but they really want to make it universal. Everybody loves Santa Claus and it's a universal picture. So why not? So Santa, his wife and the reindeer are raised from the dead. Don't wait for the TriStar picture. Sorry guys. There's no excuse. So the TriStar, the Trinity, yeah, the TriStars, the father, the son, and Santa, yeah. And also their logo is a flying equestrian animal. That's true, yeah, it's Pegasus, yeah. So a bunch of elves show up and the North Star rises them from the dead and then Dudley

Morse there. And then they go to a new home that's like a magical workshop mansion. Yeah, that's a good way to describe it. Yeah. And how much time do you figure do they spend just wandering the rooms of this in awe at everything they see? I will say I am impressed. Like I like a big physical set.

Like I like a big physical set. And in this case, a big physical set filled exclusively with dudes. I did make a, like I made a beelineline to Wikipedia to see what the budget on this was. When I saw like the sets of the North Pole, because it is like, yeah, big giant sets of, and then later on, they make a fake machine that pumps out toys. It's very like Dr. Susie and kind of thing. And I was like, this, there's a lot of elves. Yeah. And they all sleep in one big room like they're in a fucking TikTok house. And then they have like a next door hall that's basically their content creation

workshop. Yeah, it's pretty much yeah, an accelerator house. I just wonder like, what are the clauses that Santa's not allowed to open? Like, no, No, just not that here. Well, Mergers Meredith shows up out of nowhere And we never see him again. So clearly they're keeping him so Burnt's Meredith is the old fucking wizard right with the crazy two-pronged beer With the two brothers that so long that he has two elves holding the ends of his beard He's like a shop brothers movie. Yeah, looks like he should be on the cover of a chemist's album. I briefly was like, so wait, is this going to be like the previous Santa Claus that is like handing the mantle over because he's like bigger than all the other elves and he's

got this big beard. But no, he's more of a John the Baptist figure who's like, heralded the coming of Santa. Yeah, his characters listed in this cast list and looking at it as ancient elf. Yeah, and he and I mean, it also, it would be weird for him to be giving up this title because as soon as they get there, the elves tell Santa and his wife, Mrs. Claus, both of you will live forever a fucking chilling threat. Yeah, you work for us now. It looks like we work for you, yeah you work for us now it looks like we work for you but you work for us no that's whole thing is chilling i don't understand why he doesn't

react to it like a curse because the other thing is like he has to deliver toys to all the children as we know and they describe that the the way this happens is like the night will just never end for him until he has completed his rounds. So that sounds horrifying. These are simple medieval wood carving folk. What do they know from destinies and, and eternities? I mean, Elves could explain to them because of so much, you'll have toys

for every child in the world. And that creates so much mass that the gravity will slow time around you. Einstein and, and, and you know, could be like Einstein will prove this someday, but you'll be up at the North Pole, you won't hear about that. Or has he already proven it?

What does time even mean? No, time is meaningless to what such as these. Also Stuart, you mentioned that there's all dudes there made me imagine Mrs. Claus going to the elf doctor with like a menstrual problem. And the elf doctor is like, I don't know. And he says, that's something we've had to deal with. We all reproduce through budding.

We're a little elf just growing on us and then it comes out as a big elf. I don't know. Santony is all the time you can get because he has to form deep friendships with the only two children in all of Manhattan. Exactly, yeah. Yeah.

Oh, like, I mean, Joe is the only living boy in New York. Now, the man who really? Ha, ha. Ty, the other thing, like time is elastic, I guess on Christmas for Santa, but all other times, I guess it's passing normally. So they are working like mad men all year. I just kept thinking about how if like time was

a lot of drinking me on Christmas. I was gonna make the same jokes. Do my job so slowly. Yeah, like, I do it. Well, Dan, this is the difference between you and a beloved figure of folklore who glasses in their job for centuries and centuries, making children happy all over the world, you know,

I guess. Is there always striving? They've got that ambition. They've got to be the best. Because as we learn from this movie There is competition out there and they can't rest on their laurels. It's impossible. They can't even rest on stand laurel Which is too bad because he is truly one of the treasures of the cinema such a delight in everything he did So we were introduced to

We previously mentioned the Dudley Moore's and this he's one of the elves his name is patch Santa kind of gets to know him while Patch is taking care of the reindeer. Now, I like to read this. I like to read this as part of the Marvel continuity where Patch is what Wolverine calls himself when he's in Madreport. So perhaps, so perhaps Dudley Moore, when he's not doing a great job as an elf later, it's because he's busy with the X-Men off panel, you know, off screen. Okay. That's cool. And also immortal. And he's also, well, I mean, he's immortal. He's, he's, Patch is, he's real, he's a real gear head, right? He's always trying to build new things.

He's a tanker. Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, it does machines one might say. Exactly. As a mind of metals and gears, we got that shit. The, there's a moment where he even, where he's like, here's my schematic for a clock that wakes you up. And then in the next scene, a fucking Kuku clock wakes all the elves up.

It's like a good one tech for, what is cells are own shit? I got an idea. I'm going to disrupt bodegas. It's a box that goes in the lobby of buildings and you can put money in it and items come out. You mean a vending machine? That's your idea. Yeah, yeah, it's a totally new thing. I've changed the world. idea. Yeah, yeah, it's a totally new thing. I've changed the world. So, we also, we get to meet all the other reindeer. They're given names on personalities. They're awesome. It's a little bit of like getting a team together type ship. Can I read some of these names? Well, there's Puffy. There's Puffy. He's going to turn out to be Patch's kind of big competitor. But their additional elves named Goober Groot, Booge, Hanca, Voot, and Goobler.

So both Goober and Goobler work at the North Law. But also, they're always getting each other's mail. Yeah, and I'm also, it's a lot of wood up there. So I'm gonna again read that Groot, the elf is Groot from the Guardians of the Galaxy films, yet another crossover between the MCU and the SCU. That's the same one. I mean, you're talking about elves

and not the reindeer, right? No, you know the name's a reindeer. It's Donald Bl elves and not the reindeer, right? No, you know the name is a reindeer. It's Donner, Blitzon, and Dixon and stuff like that. You know? So we have a montage where we see all the elves working. They're like, you know, they're pretty synchronized. They design, seeing a suit. They make presents.

They use magic and stuff. It's pretty straightforward, right? But it just takes a long time. Yeah. Fun facts. Sorry, they do give them a green suit in this movie, which Mrs. Claus says, no, no, red actually Santa did wear green in folklore forever until the Coca-Cola Company decided otherwise. Why? So they're kind of touching on, you know. And we'll get back to Coca-Cola later. And then the roof of the workshop opens up bathing this celebrating elves and blessed guiding

moonlight. Hooray. Then the elves bring forward an old elf. We mentioned this guy before. He fucking rules. So this is so this is about a prophecy. So this role, apparently they wanted James Cagney to play it originally, this character of ancient elf, but he was too old.

He didn't want to, I think he had already finished his career. He was in rag time and that was it. And when his Fred Astaire was considered, but then Dudley Moore suggested Burgess Meredith for the role, which is he does a fine job. Now as the more interesting thing is who was going to play the villain of the movie, which we'll get to later, but just a gem as this could have been James Cagney's last role, which would have been in Orson Wells in the Transformers movie level. Like, yeah, wrong.

I'm going out on time with the way to go. Where is Burgess Meredith lived, you know, another decade and his final on screen film role I looked up was Grumpy Old Men. He did have a voice credit after. And Burgess Meredith is hilarious in the Grumpy Old Men movies. Like, I'm'm sorry he's so funny in them. I didn't clarify he was never in Transformers the movie. Yeah okay. Well that's too bad. Okay so uh the original which is kind of like Transformers for scary kids right.

I guess so he was in Rocky where a guy sort of transformed himself. Okay. And there's a robot in Rocky 4 but not in the news, but not a Burgess Meredith in Rocky 4 unfortunately Guys, I know there's a pump of the brakes too much but that bumps me out so hard that the robots I mean he had he had a he had a reason for for removing the robot I guess but they other than the fact that it's kind of bonkers, that that robot just shows up. And it's very clearly implied that Paulie is having sex with it. And that really draws focus away from the implication

that Paulie is having sex with Apollo, which is the main part of the past I told him. Yeah. OK, so they give the reindeer magic hay and they start bugging out. And then they fly. It's pretty cool. And while they give the reindeer magic hay and they start bugging out and then they fly. It's pretty cool. And while they fly the centuries roll by magic sand flows through the great hour glass at

the center of the universe time. This movie is so much more beautiful than we describe it. And then we pause this montage to see a fucked up scene where this shitty little kid hurts a cat. And apparently he's the first kid in history to go on the naughty list. Kane is like sucks to be you. I do think, yeah, it's funny. This is where it's revealed that Mrs. Claus has a very, as a, a more harsh view of the world.

We're only the only the good are deserving of reward and the naughty children fuck that. Well, I'm, I mean, it's very cold. She's a real scold. Yeah, it is there in the Bible that Santa comes with a sword. He is there and he is there to destroy the idols of the old world, you know. So, and that's really Mrs. Claus. She's the Lady Macbeth behind the throne, behind the, behind the Northern throne, you know. So, and that's really Mrs. Claus. She's the lady McBeth behind the throne, behind the behind the Northern throne, you know. So, and we also she was going to get him to

kill God. Oh wow. I got a mobius comic strip. So, and meanwhile, Santa's job is getting expedited, even with removing the naughty kids, you have to imagine it's getting expedientially harder every year as a lot fewer plagues Oh, I would spend at the same time. People are buying toys for their own kids also, right? So maybe it's a little easier. If he skips a house here and there who's going to know, you know, are the parents going to break K-Fave on this? I don't think so.

You're forgetting that his curse is endless night will not end. Oh, that's the story. That should be the story is that Santa, there's one kid that he cannot find. And this kid, and the night will not end until he delivers the final toy to that kid and it's driving Santa mad. For him, this night has gone on for a house for millennia. And even though for us, it's been just one night, oh, he's driven insane.

So he's just, he's going to houses randomly. And when he, it's not the kid he wants, he just kills them. And he runs off to the next house. That's a scary thing. That's a lot of Arthur Christmas I think. Yeah, I think it is the fluffy thing. He needs to find this kid so he can platen him life the game. Okay, so we also see how letters magically arrived to the North Pole.

They basically get whisked away by a magical wind that makes them float across the universe and eventually land through his chimney and don't get burned up. So don't think about that. basically get whisked away by a magical wind that makes them float across the universe and eventually land through his chimney and don't get burned up. So don't think about that. And then we get a little bit of extra stuff like other data points about Santa get established like this, you know, the song and then they like fat shame them a little bit and that kind of sucks. And there's a scene where he has to eat like celery instead of soup or

whatever he normally eats. But as he said, like, it's become a bigger job. So he needs an assistant. So he does a tryout amongst the elves to see who would be the best assistant. Yeah. One of whom, of course, patch our little Sarman of the elves here. And then it's what the other guys and they basically have a contest. It's patch versus

Puffy. Yeah. He's pitting them against one another with no extra money for this tryout, this contest phase. See, to get better work out of them. Yeah. This is a capitalist. Exactly. And wait, except the thing is obviously these are all games being put on by the elves to make Santa Claus think that he has any control over his own life. That's kind of a sick experiment that they're running. Eventually they're going to reveal to him that there are no children and there are no toys. It's all been, you know, it's all been, it's going to wake up in an isolation booth.

And they're going to be like, well, come on out. Yes, we've shown the malleability of the human mind. With no agency whatsoever. Yeah. Yeah, so we like patch develops like a crazy mechanical assembly line to build toys, but it immediately starts fucking up. But he wins anyway, which is kind of weird. Well, they don't test the toys.

It seems to me. Yeah. Santa just sees a bigger pile of toys and he's like, I guess it's obvious, got to go with the P-man. And they're like, well, both of our names start with P. I'm patching, he's Puffy. So which one is the P-man? You are patch, Puffy.

More like stuffy, am I right? And Puffy's like, I don't get that. I don't understand. Everyone's laughing at him and pointing. He's like, it doesn't make sense. It's not a good insult. And meanwhile, Patch is putting on like, you know, he's sitting with his feet up

on Santa Claus's desk and when Santa's showering, he's like trying on Santa's outfit and stuff like that. He's just biting his time and Mrs. Claus is making goo goo eyes at him. Oh, it's a, there's just so much, so much sort ofness going on behind the scenes of the North Pole, right? And that's why Puffy changes the name to Diddy so they wouldn't both be the people. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah.

And you know, you just, I mean, luckily we're about 45 minutes into the movie. So if you're already bored with the stuff going on in the North Pole, let's go to the real world. Don't worry. It's going to turn into a totally different movie. It is amazing how much of the movie, I mean, it is the Superman model. We're like, we're going to tell the origin of the character. They're going to have him growing up as Santa, I guess. And then we're going to have the plot.

But it's the Superman, I, I, I, and it for people who love Christmas out there, I'm sorry. Superman to me is like, interesting enough that you're like, Oh, where did this guy come from? He can fly. How did he deal with that? Where's the Santa Claus? It's like, I don't know that anyone really cares where he came from. We're also Santa recedes into the background and it becomes patches movie. And the thing is like, look, here's the thing. We all know what Santa is. Like, we don't need Santa explain to us origin wise. Like, this is something that is like taught to kids at such a young age.

We got the Santa idea. We don't need that part of the movie. So we can start with like, Elf in the city. That movie's called Elf. Sorry, little feral. One can see how this film could have been successful if they just cut off the first half. This book makes you appreciate, I think, everything that works about Superman clearly comes

from like Richard Donner and Tom Manquitz, completely rewriting David Newman's script. Because apparently David Newman's original script was real joky and didn't really take things seriously. And you look at Superman and you think, wow, this movie somehow manages to accommodate like Maulin Brando as Joriel and Ned Beatty as Otis. Those are like two very different tones that somehow fit into this whole thing. Whereas this movie wants you to take in like Santa Claus

and the elder Elf and blah, blah, blah. And then also John Lithgow like acting to the rafters as the evil evil bad guy. And it's like, oh, you thought he delivered a big performance? This child Lithgow? But it's like not a, but it's also not a jockey movie. Like, there's not, there are some jokes. There's one John Lithgow joke that I think is so funny.

I had to rewind to watch it again. But other than that, like, it's a movie that it takes, it takes this Santa Claus, it takes Santa Claus so seriously. Like, it's, it's, like there are times and it's like, there's, I mean, when one of the child characters, it laid on his bound and gagged in like the back room of a warehouse

and I was like, this is too much. This is too much for a Santa Claus. Speaking of, speaking of child characters, in the modern day on the mean streets of New York City, we meet a plucky young, urchin named Joe. He was just trying to survive out there. He stands looking through the window of a McDonald's and for like 20 minutes, we watch a family and a fucking nickname. It's like the end of Stella Dallas and it had been Adam McDonald's.

And I'm glad you said urchin because like the kid literally has like smudges on his face like when works in a mill and figureless gloves. We're introduced to these two child characters. We'll meet the other one in a moment. And they're both, I was like, we saw a yellow taxi cab. So this must be like the present day, but they're both like Victorian characters. And you think he's like looking through the window

of McDonald's and he's maybe he's just amazed by the fluorescent light. Like he does know what he's seeing. But I'm also. Yeah, it's like that issue of from hell where the doctor is like traveling through time and seeing the horrors of the future. He's a modern day office. He's like, you're all dead already. I can only assume that the movie like the movie rightfully knew that Santa Claus cold in

the movie was not a film that could support having a like realistic homeless child in it. And so they're like, oh, let's make him a character out of Oliver rather than being like, let's rewrite this so we don't have to deal with the issue of homelessness. I mean, that's the else, they could also. Bad movie. Yeah, they exactly, they also could have had

not a homeless character in it. The little matchboy, although I really, a movie called Santa Claus movie can barely sustain Santa Claus role. Yeah, I said, the second half, he's barely in it. I will say also, if you rent Santa Claus' is coal in the movie, which didn't mention, that's a very different movie. That's not one, you're not gonna see this part.

It's a specialized audience. Yeah, yeah, very much so. But I also wanna mention that when he looks to the McDonald's, the sound dubbing on the eating in that is so funny. It's only a few shots, I guess, and it's like the loudest slurp of a soda. It's like, this is, can't listen to, like, did he bug the room, like, the conversation style? He's just listening to these eating sounds.

Oh, it's so funny. Only the Mac and the Breakdance number had broken out. I think that would have really, you know, that would have been. So we're also introduced to a nice rich girl who lives on a mansion at named Cornelia. And she leaves like a plate of food and a frosty old Coke out in the snow for Joe the Urchin who, you know, slurps that down while holding it in the appropriate way so we can see the logo the whole time. If the old, the old can works as coke and not Coca-Cola. Yeah. Yeah. This is this is this was the the

horrible coke that no one liked of the mid 80s. You know, this was new coke but when she puts it down on the ground for him, the meaning can't be a choice. He's literally a beggar. Of course. Yes. Like if it was an RC, he would just have to take it. Yeah. But don't even bring up such an idea. Forget. No, no, no. She puts the can down coke side to the camera. And then when he goes to pick it up, it has coke a cola side to the camera. So the continuity screwed up, but they're always labeled a camera. Like that never fails.

So Santa decides to make an unscheduled stop. It's Christmas Eve and he's flying around. And he wants to give this street kid Joe a toy. But instead, he like takes him on a late night sleigh ride. It's not weird. Don't be gross, guys. It's totally normal. And then there's a lot of rain, magic carpet ride. It's fine. Yeah. There's a lot of reindeer reaction shots like every two seconds, we're seeing them like cover their eyes of their ears and shit. And this is this one they try to pull off a super duper looper, but the reindeer can't do it. I think maybe I can't. I got a little too scared. I also was covering my eyes with my ears. And also speaking of Superman, you know, like this shares with that long

loving shots of just the characters flying. It works for me a sophomore. A forever. It does work for me as a fucking ever. Like the thing is in Superman, you're like, Oh, yeah, like I haven't seen this done in a movie before. Like I will believe a man can fly. Yeah, whereas by the time Santa Claus, the movie comes around, you're like, Oh, God. Can you stop with this thing?

Santa Claus, the movie comes around. You're like, oh, God, can you stop with this thing? Dan, I would agree with you, except that these old fashioned process shots are the best thing in the movie to make life. And maybe it's just because it reminds me of my childhood. I know I saw this movie as a kid and the only things I really remember are the flying shots, maybe because there's so much of them. But just give me that three-dimensional object that's clearly been optically printed or whatever into footage of a skyline

and just make it get the vectors right, so it scales properly and I'm there and put some animated glowy dust all over that. Do it, yeah. When Chris says, there's more glitter in this movie than in Mariah Carey's glitter. Like every single magical,

every kind of like transition, whatever, star-wide, blu, glitter, glitter, glitter, everywhere. It shows you that a not confident filmmaker who's like, how are people going to know this is magic? How are they going to feel it is magical? Works for strip clubs. Okay. So a few days after Christmas, the toys that Santa delivered are falling apart in a very

funny scene of kids like their shit is breaking. I like the kids like thing goes out into the street and a bus runs it over. You can't blame Santa for a thing breaking when a bus runs and that bus comes so close to the kid. All I think was like that child almost died and he's just like, oh, my wagon. And like, playing the street first. Yeah. Yeah. That's on you kid. Now all the world has turned on Santa. People hate him.

They're saying it's junk. It's kids start getting into fights trying to defend Santa. They're beating up. The other agents are beating up Joe because he said Santa's a good guy. Yeah. The kids in ballet class turn on Cordelia and there's a pretty wicked slap in that. And the gifts are being returned somehow. They just like start dumping through.

I'm guessing through the same magic as how he gets his letters. They start to like draft up like a Twitter poster, some shit to apologize. It's pretty weird. And then patch has to resign. He packs his shit, the reindeer is cry. And then he bounces, he's out of there. Get him the fuck out of there. I got to, I got to, like clearly patches ideas were fundamentally sound. It was just a question of, of, you know, quality control. Well, I clearly, why were they clearly fundamentally sound maintenance? Well, because it worked, it worked.

It was working faster, you know, if it was faster, but you they got bad toys out of it. Never have you maintained the machines properly. Don't push them, you know, like, is it possible to control? I think someone say, someone say if you plot, if you properly properly regulate Facebook, it's a force for good. I would say impossible.

If you bury patches and you knew it with an actual OSHA inspector, I think you might have something. I mean, clearly, if you had an enemy of progress, Elliott, that's what I mean. I am. That's true. Get a horse. I mean, I would love to get a horse. Thank you.

So maybe a little one I can carry in my pocket. But Dan, I think you're right. Well, the problem is patch did not do a prototype run to see. I mean, I guess they did, but then they just shipped those out. It happens with Kickstarter all the time, man. You got to get up. There's no QCLs there, like checking things afterwards. Yeah, exactly.

Okay, so there's a QCL, who's like, oh, we need to hire all these Ls. You would think that the, you would think that the movie's over, but no cut to a courtroom where John Liff guy was on trial. He is. No, he's not. He's he's testifying before Congress. He is not on trial. He's he's smoking a big fat sea guard. He's he's testifying before the congressional committee on like toy quality. He's a dangerous toy subcommittee. He's basically he's basically kind of doing the Dan Acroid bit from Saturday Night Live, right? Yes, exactly. We have bag of glass and all that stuff.

Yeah, and Johnny Hume Torch. So this is... And his character is BZ. That's his name. Yes. And this role, so according to Wikipedia, they wanted a star, they liked that Jean Hackman who was a big star, played Lex Luthor and Superman. They wanted to star that big.

So they offered the role to Harrison Ford. Very, it would have been a very different performance. What? Then, and then when he turned it down, they offered it to Dustin Hoffman, Bert Reynolds, and Johnny Carson, and all of them turned the part down. And then eventually,

they, John Luthor, who was not a big star at the time, they brought him in apparently after seeing him in terms of a deerman, which I totally get. He's great in terms of a deerman. So he's great and basically everything, even bad stuff, even sped stuff. He's still good in. But yeah, it's, but I just imagine how different this role would have been if it was like Johnny Carson playing it or Bert Reynolds or there's a way to do it, I guess, but or Harrison Harrison forge the one I don't, I don't believe it. They could work. I don't buy Harrison Ford as an evil toy maker.

Like a sorry. A gruff toy maker. They could work. I don't buy hair support as an evil toy maker, like I'm sorry. A gruff toy maker. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Like Carrie Fisher, yes, Harrison Ford. Oh, Carrie Fisher would have been amazing in this part. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. So we're all ready for an evil female toy maker. They just couldn't have it. Yeah. Back in BZ's office, Pat shows, Pat shows up and they start scheming. That's right. Pat wants to get back into Sanis good graces.

BZ wants to reform his image a little bit. So together they hatch a plan to give away some free shit using magic. Uh, so that of course they make Pat be in a commercial for BZ toys and he looks uncomfortable, but whatever it's cool. I, I, I was a little unclear about, so later on, Dudley Moore delivers all of these toys for free. You know, a rocket car. In a rocket car.

Yeah. I mean, I wasn't sure why they were advertising an item that was just gonna show up. Because he's too, like a YouTube album. Because he's too, yeah, that was the worst. worst I felt so it was felt so invasive and that you We hated it because we didn't know what's happening You know, I don't like TV commercial maybe and I don't like you too So the idea that if they had offered to me was said no, thank you. Oh, you don't like us

Sorry, Bono you're I guess you're great. I don't near not my thing. I'm sorry. Oh No, no, I also don't like you, but at this point, my brand is stuff. You don't like YouTube? Oh, boy, this is too much stuff that sounds the same. So they want the public, they want the PR from it. So he's putting out the big commercial on every network in the world saying, hey, busy toys loves kids so much. We're going to give free toys to everybody.

Hey, I know that when you showed my teddy bear in front of the Senate, so committee undied your toys and you opened it up. It was full of glass and nails. But now I'm giving you free toys. So aren't you in this magic in it? And it's an edible. Yeah, it's not actually a toy. You were giving you pivotids too. It's a magic. Yeah, it's a very, it's a very broad definition of toy and it is funny in the commercial how patches super stiff like he clearly is not enjoying it and he's surrounded

by like like rocket type dancers. Yeah, but this is this around the time I just wanted to highlight John the guy has a line here that was so funny where he's cracking his knuckles while he walks with his with that was named Towser his assistant yeah, he goes, ah, nothing like cracking your knuckles while he walks with his, with what's the name, Towsr, his assistant. Yeah, he goes, yeah, he goes, ah, nothing like cracking your knuckles, the pleasant to sound

in the world. And it's so funny because it's like, that's it. Yeah, I believe that character would feel that way, but there's no plot reason for it. Like, it's not a thing he does every again. It's just one of the things that's great about that commercial is that you can tell they've had to figure out a way. How do we dress up a bunch of showgirls and deadly more in colors and costumes that are more garish and tasteless than what the actual elves have been wearing this entire movie? Because those outfits are an assault on the eyes.

Like Santa and Mrs. Claus went up in these yellow polka dot ensembles where you're just like, make it stop. I don't know, man, I think I can pull off that fit. Well, you said any move. Yeah, sure. No, no., man. I think I could pull off that fit. Well, you said any of that. Yeah. That's what I was fishing for. It's like they're like Elf Law states. No, no sleeve can be the same color as another sleeve in the same garment. No, no one color garments. Elf Law

says so from the book of Elfitticus. Oh, we didn't even mention all those damn Elf puns went. So, Delie more constantly like, you just need a little more elf confidence or it's like oh well I've got a lot of elf control and it's like God damn it. Come on man. Oh, that's oh, that's my elf image and later on he hasn't there's an elf portrait. It's like every time. Yeah. You're being alpha facing. Okay, day he would be taking an elfie. No, it's great. facing. Okay, day he would be taking an Elfy. So you had mentioned the Rockettes before. Of course, so that means that Dudley Moore invents a rocket card to deliver all the presents. Yeah, that's where the rocket is. Yep. And the magic shit that he gives all the kids,

it's like magical Ollipops and make you float or something. Yes. Huge hit. Everybody loves this shit. People are going nuts. No one uses. Yeah. No one dies. Amazingly. BZ wants more. That's right. Dudleymore to make even more again, Dudleymore. So he that's more is law. You need magic in your lollipops to make you so he devises a plan for Christmas, the sequel, a gay Christmas to which I think is a really good idea for March. Back at the North Pole, Santa is fucking bummed, dude. He's starting to rethink his life. He's blaming people for not having the Christmas spirit.

And I'm like, work on yourself, dude, or maybe you can just diminish and go live in the West. Who cares? I mean, so the fact that he started to run around. He's like someone likes another toy. I guess I should just quit. He's such a big baby. Yeah. It's a lot of, he's a lot, he's very elephant titled, you know, uh, is about. Oh, no, no, it's starting. Uh, so you have the Elves trying to step out of the letters Dan with it with hate. There's a great scene where

the Elves trying to snap sand out of it by showing him a doll that wets itself And he's like get that shit out of my face So mad about Back in New York City or Joe show you're old-fashioned We want new ideas like lollipops that make you fly. Exactly. Yeah. Joe shows up at Cornelays mansion. He's all six. So she takes him in and lets him get over his fever and the basement. He's literally he's lying among trash in the basement. And this house has roughly 400. She's got to make him feel comfortable.

He's more comfortable around trash. Like Jason Bore and Asa Sleep on the floor. Do you think there was a scene where he was in like a lavish, luxurious bedroom and he was like, I can't, I just can't get comfortable. Do you have like a flat cardboard box on a heart's bedroom? You're going to go in this house somewhere. The movie is really weird about this character.

Again, I think to try and cut the sadness of just having this character in the movie because he's always like, no, I don't want to sleep inside, you know? Like, as if it's his bit his choice to be out in the street. Yeah. He should be doing whatever that number

from Oliver and company is, you know, about. Making the living by his wits or whatever, why should I worry? Yes, that's it. And we've learned by this point that Cornelia is Beazy's niece, right? Or step niece? Step niece. Yeah.

No, it's like they... It's like Beazy's in the house with them. We want to make sure that the audience knows that Cornelia doesn't have any of Beazy's tainted evil blood. It's a step, Uncle, not a who still takes care of her for some reason. Yeah, she is such an orphan that like she stepped uncle was the best she could do. Everybody else gone. So they're in the basement and they over here a secret business talk between Beasy and his

business manager guy while they drink, do they both drink PBR out of Brandy's sneakers? I think it was miller high life well i think it's i think it's pbr i think that that was the other big brand uh... the other the other brand sponsor of this movie besides coconut i could tell if he put it out for konyak or a brandy and port is manager the pbr which would be a funnier joke but i but this is the this also has the joke that I, you know, thought Elliott might have been referring to.

Obviously, he was talking about the knuckle one, but I like when John lethko was going, uh-huh, uh-huh. When the guy kept saying, like, finally, he was like, could you just say more than one citizen at a time? So I don't have to stand here saying, uh-huh, over and over and over. And so, Towsar, we should mention he's played by multiple Emmy winner Jeffrey Kramer, who, uh, you, who was in Stewart's favorite movie, Heart Beeps as party butler robot. Oh, yeah.

The full shooter movie, Heart Beeps. Yeah. Heart Beeps. Yeah. Kramer. Yeah. He's the one always busing in and shaking his head all funny. Uh, and then he had that horrible stand-up snafu.

Okay. So, let's see. A lot of misunderstandings there, but I think it's okay. So we find out that the magic candy canes that they're trying to give out that are super powered are just a little too volatile and can explode and expose to heat. Uh-oh. I wonder if that's going to matter, but Bees, he's like, fuck it, let's just risk it, who cares. However, they find out that the kids overheard this shit.

So of course, he captures Joe and chains him to a radiator in the basement of the factory. Yeah, their plan is literally to, that he says we've got all this money in cash because I guess kids have been paying for the candy canes ahead of time in cash. And they're gonna take the cash and go to Brazil where they'll just live a hedonistic life until their hearts give out and they can't

be extradited. And that patch faced the music and you know a life sentence in prison will be a you know an eternal one so that's really kind of a dark irony. Yeah, yeah, the horrifying. Yeah, eventually the prison will fall down around Pat. Yeah. Yeah. When when when when we America's vote a wasteland, yeah, I show yeah. So he believes in rules by that point.

So he refuses to leave the grounds of what was once the prison until he until his he's cleared by the governor. Yeah. So Cornelia writes, say, no letter. It gets whisked away with magic. It shows up in Santa's like, what the fuck? It's January. Who's the greedy kid who needs shit? And then he reads he's like, Oh man, Joe needs our help. So let's settle up these reindeer. And they're like two of them are sick. And he's like, I don't give a shit. This goes the fact that two of them are sick does not release go much of

anywhere. It's not matter at all. Yeah. I, but it does have a cute moment where they're sticking out like a curly cue thermometer and a reindeer puppet's mouth. Yeah, and it lights up. That was that was doing it. It gives a long speech to the remaining reindeer puppets, which I was like, you made a special Academy Award. outstanding Santa acting before puppets. Yeah. Yeah. At the, at the factory, Joe and Patch have a confrontation. Patch realized that Santa still likes him. So because he finds it's like weird statue that Santa whittled up and it's like, again, Funko pops. So they decide bounce back to the North Pole. However, he loads all the explosive candy canes into

the trunk of his rocket car and you're like, uh, oh, because he doesn't know they're explosive. And why does he do that? Well, because he's like, if I do this, then Santa won't have to make shit because I already made this shit. I'm giving out next year. Kids love it. Cause the whole reason he did this was just to show Santa that he's really good. So he go back to Santa and get his job.

Yeah. Right. And they were meld in the super hot trunk of my rocket. Exactly. So Santa and Cornelay are chasing them in the sleigh trying to warn them of the danger there. And because they don't know that those things are going to explode. Now, back at BZ's office, the authorities are closing in on them. They're going to bust his ass. So he chomps a bunch of candy canes who escape and he flies out the window and eventually flies into outer space. Yeah. It's just like Moriarty at the end of League of Externary, gentlemen, volume one,

Alan Moore, once again stealing from Dudley Moore's work. He did him a boil, do it again. In the director's cut, he becomes the star child though. So it's a whole other thing. Oh, wow. Yeah, he achieves enlightenment once he gets far enough with Mureth and he goes, oh, why was I, why was I so concerned with possessions and physical things? Truly, it is the matter of the soul. That is the only thing that made that that should matter at all. And he goes and he becomes from B to Z the beta to the. Yeah. So it's a singularity inside. He's he watched the game in a hotel room.

Yeah, he goes back in time and becomes the big bang and his and his spirit. It tells Adam and even the garden to make toys or something. I don't know. But that was the big thing. That's the big thing. That's the bee's he says. So, this is all great. But meanwhile, back in the terrestrial realm, Santa is chasing the rocket car, which is starting to have some problems here.

And they're like, there's no way we're going to catch them. They're going to explode. Well, if only more patch and Joe are hot dogs so much in this rocket car, you're just driving without anyone steering, they're covering their eyes. It goes on forever. Them just kind of like doing doing tricks in the truck driving like you stole it. There was a part. There's a part during this long chase scene where like Audrey had paused the movie to point out some buildings in the Bronx that she recognized. And I'm like, we're 10 minutes away from the end. Why are you setting this up?

Why? So is there a feeling? I've never been a professional filmmaker. Guys, what do you think? Is there a feeling that if you have a chase sequence of any kind, it just also functions as padding to get your movie to a certain length? Because it reminds me of the chasing and how were the duck where they're on that little plane and it goes on for so long.

And there's no way anyone watching it was ever like more of this. We're not doing enough of it. It's too entertaining. We need more. Like, it feels like it's just a way of just padding out the end of the movie. Or what? I mean, I've mentioned it on the show before,

but like, that's what I read about the rock-ford files. So they put a chase in every episode so they could make time. They could either expand or contract as needed. I feel like the suns of anarchy did the same shit. I think in movies that don't work, you're more likely to cut dialogue than you are anything. that remotely resembles action.

I guess that makes sense. Just a thought. Because it's like every other news. And if you get if you get freed, get in there to direct your slay rock a card, I forgot that instead of it's an additional slay material directed by William Friedkin, that's right. But it's like there's that chase sequence in the town, which is otherwise kind of a mediocre movie. And it's like every time I see a good chase sequence, it like jumps out and hits me in

the face. And I wonder like, did they think they were making that? Or is it just that most of the chase sequences I see are so lackluster that when I see a good one, I'm like, whoa, what is this? Well, David Newman did co-write What's Up Doc, which has a great car chase in it. So maybe he was trying to sort of like chase that dragon? That is a really good chasing all the they ruined some public stairs in San Francisco Driving driving a car over them without permission. So take that I just hope someday Peter by Danovich will pay for that

Carmically in some way I don't know And I'm Sorry, that's was that too much. The wreckage is like the line. And the first time ever in this podcast. So it looks like there's nothing they can do. The slays just not going fast enough. And then Santa turns to Cornel and he's like, we're going to have to do the fucking super duper looper.

So which means they go much faster. And then they do a loop where they fly under the rocket car. They loop over the rocket car. Rocket car explodes and they loop back under and catch them, which is wild. Why do they have to do the whole exactly? No, they're just stunting. What's happening? Yeah, they're stunting.

I was yelling at the television. What is this maneuver supposed to be accomplishing? It feels less like they're trying to save, like saving patch and Joe is there's a side effect of them of Santa taking the moment to just front and show that show Santa and so patch that he's always going to be the best and patch.

There's like a special achievement they need to unlock. Like I don't know the fuck's going on. Yeah, if he's going to get the medal for the level. Yeah. It's like when Jane Fonda finally does the back flip at the end of

on Golden Pond. And so you know that she has taken in the lessons. It's, you know, it has that same identical emotional. I get it. So, San is like, I never can get over the, my feelings about my father until I do the super duper live for exactly. That was, I was, I only recently got to see on Golden Pond for the first time. And I was like, it just struck me what I was like, I can't imagine this movie being as big a hit as it was at the time. It's so much about like, just kind of like,

upset white people who are doing fine otherwise, you know? But it was, I don't know, that was like the second biggest movie the year or something like that. Oh yeah, well, you know, it's funny when you go back and you look at the top 10 box office of the early 80s, movies like Terms of Endearment and on Golden Ponder there where now it's like it's all, you know, Marvel and Fast and the Furious, but like, yeah, these sort of adulty

dramas that they barely even make anymore were huge theatrical experiences. We're enormous. Well, you had to go to the movies to see that kind of thing. You just couldn't watch that on TV. I mean, yeah, I feel like again, like a lot of that type of stuff has now been relegated to like 10-part mini series and just- No, absolutely, no question. That's true.

If they did on Golden Pine now, it would be like at least a six-part mini series and a lot of it would be told in reverse, like it would start with a mystery and then you'd have to go back to find out. You'd be flashbacks to them as kids and stuff like that. Oh, man, that would be so boring. Guys, you know what, let's do it. Let's make it. Let's just make on golden mom and series.

Dan, who do you think would play the Catherine Hepburn part? Why do you think, Dan's the cast director, because you're the casting director. Dan, it's Catherine Hepburn. What part do you think it is? It was not known for, okay, perfect. Great. You mean, literally's Catherine Hepburn. What part do you think it is? She was not known for it. Okay, perfect. Great. You mean, somebody literally played Catherine Hepburn? Okay, Dan. Remember that. I was like, oh, wait, in the aviator, she was, but I think that means that I think he's not okay. So who's playing Henry Fonda then? Don't say Peter Fonda. He's not alive anymore. Well, I mean, how old is Henry Fonda and old?

He's very old. He's very old. Like old old. Okay, could we, Guy Pearson, old guy make up? Yes, okay, we did it. Guy Pearson, old guy make up. Kate Blanchis, as Katherine Hepburn

and as the kid will say Timothy Shalmott. Okay, continue to do it. Let's finish the movie. So they go back to Santa's workshop, they fucking pop some bottles, throw a party at rules, right? We've he's over. Yeah, they're like, oh, this kid,

these kids are gonna stay with us forever. And then the head elf is like, now I have to open a school and the kids, and there's this look in the kid's face of like, what is happening? Wait a minute, what? Maybe Santa thinks that he's found an air. He's allowed to die. Yeah, all the curse is broken. Yeah, all the other homeless children in the world can go sucking egg I guess They would love to suck an egg Dan that's needed sustenance

The last shot of this movie is John Lithgow in space. Yeah, that is the last. Yeah, right before it's lunch explode. They're all laughing and dancing and yet a lesson is just him floating off to space to die. Like there's no, he's not coming back. Yeah, he's got a free solid and then, you know, if he did come back, he would fall to his death. If he came back, he would certainly be changed in some way.

Strange, horrifying. And catch fire while entering the atmosphere. Yeah, yeah. So he's now he's this horrible, melted, gloomy, insane creature that is wandering around looking for Santa to get, looking for patch to get revenge. Because Beasy and Santa never meet each other in the whole being. It's just like heat, except without the scene, without Pacino and Robert Carrot, meeting each other.

Yeah. Hello! I'm P.W. Herman. You might know me from TV, but I really want to be a DJ. It took some convincing, but KCRW finally agreed to give me an hour on the radio to play you some music with my friends. Anyway, tune in for one hour of the bestest, most funnest time you'll ever have on the Pee Wee Herm in Radio Hour.

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I don't know how to describe it. There's always that moment where Jesse asks a question that the person he's interviewing has not thought of before. I don't think anyone's ever said that to me or acknowledged that to me and that is so real. Bullseye, interviews with creators you love and creators you need to know from MaximumFun.org and NPR. Hey, this show is improbably sponsored by some people and we'd like to thank them and get

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There's a lot of parts of our life that we do work on so that they stay in healthy working order. You get your car tuned up, you exercise to keep your body working right, you eat right because you got to put in good stuff. If you want to get good stuff out of it, by which I mean, quality fertilizer. So going to therapy is a lot like that,

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to own it forever then it says Cryptkeeper laugh. Oh, wow. So give me a Cryptkeeper laugh. I can't. What? Thank you. Dueling Cryptkeeper laughs.

Okay, laughs. Is that the plural of laughs? Labs. Yes. Yes. Har fans use another horror thing for you. Hey, by the time this episode comes out, maniac of New York, the Bronx is burning number

one. First issue of the new mini series volume of my story comic with Andrew Moody from Aftershock Comics is going to be out in stores that's maniac of New York, the Bronx is burning. Number one, that's right. maniac Harry is back along with all your favorite heroes from the first first series, Zelda, Gina, Lena, that mayor that nobody likes. They're all in this one, but uh oh, the maniac is up in the Bronx and things are going to get horrifically bloody.

If you're new to maniac of New York, the collect edition of the first series, maniac of New York, volume one, the death train is also on store shelves now. So pick it up. It's from aftershock comics. Go to your local complex store and tell them I want maniac of New York, the Bronx is burning number one, and I want you to order me the rest of the series. It's going to be four issues, four pulse pounding issues of horror in the crazy Kaelin classic. Yeah. Something that starts with what that means like manner or style, but starts with K or C characteristic. Yeah, characteristic. So yeah, go to your local comic store and say, make mine, maniac of New York.

That's so much better. Thank you, Stuart, for that maniac of New York. The Bronx is burning. Number one, on-store shells now. All right, well, let's do final judgments with this is a good bad movie, a bad bad movie or a movie you kind of like. I don't know, because I was yelling at the movie to end, I think I have to say that it's a bad bad movie, but also it is so very strange like this movie.

Dan, Dan, you want to know how much stranger could be this calls for a quick opinion of that. Originally offered the chance to direct the movie, John Carpenter. Yeah. But he also wanted to do the writing and the school. Yeah, you want to do the score and the final cut they said no. Uh, yeah. Well, thank God. Um, good work, John.

You get you priced yourself out of it. You have to imagine they were like John Carpenter, you want to direct the Santa Claus movie? And he goes, I can't say no, because maybe they'll ask me to direct a Superman movie. So I'll just say yes, but I also want to do the score. And they were like, okay, forget it, forget it. I, I, yeah, I, it is a one of the more bizarre things that you will see in terms of like a, a big blockbuster from the past or would be blockbuster, just a missbygotten projects. Like I would say bad, bad, I didn't really enjoy it.

I saw it when I was a kid. I didn't like it when I was a kid either. But it is almost worth seeing just because it's so strange. Is my- That's very strange. I was very excited when I saw that Dudley Moore's playing a character named Patch, which I assumed was kind of a reference to the reoccurring scoundrel figure that keeps showing up in the Dark Souls universe games. But in fact, that has nothing to do with it. He is not a weird bald spider man or normal man who tricks the hero and then you have to get revenge

on him. That doesn't happen in this movie. Or Pat Chattano, or Pat Chattano. Yeah. So I'm going to say bad, bad, I guess. I'm gonna say good bad because it is not a good movie, but I feel like it is, if you said to someone, hey, they made a movie about Santa Claus, this is both what you would imagine and exactly not what you would imagine. It's like everything in it is, you're watching, you're

like, yeah, I guess this is, this is what you do if you're making a Santa Claus movie. But everything's just like enough degrees off that it doesn't feel right. But it might but a some of that I think is just residual 80s nostalgia on my part. I love John Lithgaus office. I love that it's the 80s, but because he's rich, the iconography is that he dresses like it's the 30s, complete with those like mud covers over his shoes that people haven't worn since the 30s. And like, it's, you know, it's, and I love all 80s effects. So I'm going to say good bad, but only if I guess you're exactly my age and me.

I mean, it's like, I don't know if this is a category. It's bad, bad, but you have to see it. You just, you can't be able to describe this thing. You have to look at it and be like, wow, someone thought this was a good idea. And again, I think it is, if nothing else, if you want to elevate Superman and Superman to in your mind, this is what it could have been. I think this movie is, it's like when you watch the, the version of Brazil that the president of Universal actually wanted to release. It's like, okay, well, now we know what you were about.

Like, this is what the Salkins would have done with Superman if other people hadn't stepped in and be like, let's not do it this terrible way and maybe make a good movie. So yeah, it's bananas. I had never seen this one until I was researching my previous book, Have Yourself a Movie, Little Christmas. And my jaw was on the floor the whole time. Couldn't believe this thing. Yeah, and if you're like me and you like going to YouTube

to watch the Christmas commercials of your youth, which is a really great nostalgia fix. There are these mid 80s like Kodak commercials that is just footage from this film with occasional like, you know, freeze frames as though some L4 taking like disc camera snapshots of each other or whatever. But I'm like, well, okay, gotta use that footage. You built that set, you might as well. Yeah, this, this movie, it's what you'd call like a grim cartoon.

Like, it's totally unrealistic in childlike, but it also, but it's shot like the 80s movies that still kind of look like 70s movies. So like, this kid is an Victorian urchin, but it looks like he lives in a grime and it's disgusting and like, the buildings all look kind of a little old and run down and like, it's, they, they, it's like kind of a little old and run down and like it's, they, they, it's like kind of shot too real, but it also exists in a world where a kid like

takes a magic lollipop and suddenly he can float up to the cookie jar and just get waggles eyebrows at his mom like, eh, no, I have control of the cookies. I, uh, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm sorry. I was just saying I watched this on peacock and there were commercials in there and I feel like it enhanced the viewing experience. You could take BZ and put him right into Oliver Stone's Wall Street, I think, and he would fit right in. He's got the hair slick back, the whole thing going on. Well guys, much like Santa Claus, we get letters.

Unlike Santa Claus. They aren't asking for ponies or Xboxes or. Yep. That's the plural Xbox is to kind of hesitantly say is this the end? Well, I was going to add a number, but then I was like, I don't know. I'm not sure. What the current version? I don't know what the Xbox is. It's the PlayStation 5. Yeah, but Dan, I guess what you're saying is it's the most letterful time of the year. Everyone's mailing the letters and it's too bad. It takes so long for us to get to the letters you sent us.

Maybe they'll be relevant to this time of the year, but possibly not this year It's the most Letterful time of the decade. Hey remember the 90s when people started emailing letters Hello, but now they're back letters are back on the show It's the most letterful time of the beyond. Dinosaurs didn't sense how many letters those days and neither did mollusks. But in this time, geologically speaking,

this blink of an eye in the face of the cosmos, it's the most letterful time there's ever been. I guess the invention of writing was really what made this possible for this to be the most letterful time of the Ion, right? Yeah. Um, yep. So, uh, this letter goes like this. Don't ever change, Elliot.

Oh, thanks. I can't. It's impossible. I've tried. Following in the tradition of generations of Jews before her, my daughter is entertaining the goyum during the Christmas season. In particular, she is performing in a local production of a Christmas Carol. She's never seen any of the movie adaptations, which one do you recommend? Flop bless us

everyone, stage mom last name withheld. I assume that we'll probably have a similar Scrooge, but the... Scrooge. Oh, I was gonna say the Alistair Sim one is kind of generally accepted to be the best one, but if your daughter is on the stage. You're gonna say them up at Christmas Carol, huh? Well, yeah, if I'm saying if this,

if she's oven aged, that she does not like to watch old movies, I mean, I like to old movies as a kid, but a lot of kids don't. I mean, kids love. Kids love Alistair Sim is also part of it. They love green for danger. Yeah, all that stuff. School for scoundrels. What were you saying?

Scrooge. Scrooge with Bill Murray and Carol Kane. Yeah, that's the best one. It's got monsters in it. I have monsters in it. They all go. This one has what's his name? Buster Point Dexter?

What's his name? Yeah, Buster Point Dexter, yeah. From David Johansson. Yeah. Yeah. Double thumbs up. I don't know your problem is. Any other suggestions? I mean, I mean,

I'm gonna say a lot of you. You're the you're the you're the you're the you're the Christmas movies. So I mean, Dan is right. The Alistair Sim version. I think for the for the most part is pretty much everybody's favorite and is considered to be one of the best ones. But if you're looking for more recent one than that, although obviously for for anybody younger than me, this is an old movie. The 1984 made for TV version with George C. Scott is pretty great. He's a really good scrooge and it pretty much covers most of the bases from the original story. And I'm personally a fan of the 1970s scrooge with Albert Finney. It's a musical version. Song's actually written, and screenplay written by Leslie Brickas, who co-wrote the terrible

songs in Santa Claus of the movie. Don't hold that against Scrooge, and it's going to be on Criterion Channel in December. But yeah, I think those are probably my favorite ones. I'm trying to think of like a recent-ish one that is pretty true. I mean, you could do the Patrick Stewart one from the late 90s, I guess, but it's a little dark. I didn't see that FX one. I tried it a couple of times, it's just too much for me.

I've heard people find it to be excessively grim. The guy Pearson Old Man makeup to bring it back to that. Hell yeah. It's the only way it doesn't now. He only, he only appears in old man makeup or having sex with Kate Winslet. That's the only way he appears in things now. Yeah. And that was a show where he got to play his actual age.

I thought that was pretty cool. Yeah, that, I mean, because usually he wears old age makeup and all of this stuff. Yeah, they, they, they then pull off all that makeup. They de-letto-fied him. I wonder my kids, so I think sometimes about how different my kids' media viewing habits is than mine was, where we live in a streaming world, they can watch whatever show they want, whenever they want, and they're not at the mercies of network scheduling. So when I was a kid, even as a Jewish kid, it was like, I was bombarded with so much Christmas stuff. And I felt like every sitcom did their version of a Christmas Carol. And it was

either a Christmas Carol, or it's a wonderful life. Every sitcom did their version of that. And I wonder if I don't think my kids eat by their age. I think I'd seen 400,000 adaptations of a Christmas Carol. And I don't think they've seen anything. Any, maybe they've seen them up at Christmas Carol, but I may have to introduce to them because even though I don't care for Christmas, it's got lots of ghosts in it. Do you ever have to write letters to Santa Claus and school and shit?

Not in school. The closest I can think of is that in preschool, it would run Easter time. There's a thing where everyone was supposed to like color in pictures of Easter baskets with different eggs. And they're like, we're Jewish. So we'll find something else for you to color in. And I was like, but I could like color eggs like, it's not, I mean, we have eggs. So we just, I would say we used to have eggs, you know, but how old would you make a blint?

Yeah, exactly. Thank you. But, but I feel like there was such a, you could not escape Christmas, uh, when we were younger whereas now I feel like it's because of the way media has fractured, it's very escapeable, you know. Mm-hmm. Interesting. Interesting. Well, let's go to this uncontroversial next letter titled Elliott Kaelin doesn't know anything about Star Wars. Interesting. That my goodness. Sick burn. That is a, this is the sickest burn. Oh man, well let's. Dearest floppers, I've enjoyed your show for many years and it's been a real pleasure

to listen to the three friends chat about nonsense while I clean the house. I almost wrote in once before when Stuart explained the entirety of the Saw franchise for obvious reasons. See my full name below. Let's look at. Just jigsaw last name to help. Yeah. Yeah. Um, uh, jigsaw. Oh, you know, yeah.

As a side note, I think there was an actual moment in that one where Stewart can remember the name of the character Mark Kaufman, which is insane on several levels. I don't, I don't know why that's insane. Oh, no, man. Bob, blah, blah, blah, blah. Let's say, okay, here's the main meat of the... Yeah, let's do it. Are you, man? So if I didn't write in then, why would I write in now because of what you...

It's a question. ...and shock on hearing the most recent episode of the flop house episode 356, the very excellent Mr. Dundee, to find that Elliot Kaylin, who was claimed to know about Star Wars, appears to have only been faking it the whole time, memorizing fourth tier character names does not count as knowledge, Elliot. That's just trivia.

Imagine what is it? What is the thing that I, what is the thing I got wrong about Star Wars? Keeping in mind, I have so many things I have to keep on my mind these days. Imagine my shock with Elliot stated that Darth Vader was wasting his time chasing Princess Leia through her spaceship. We can just blow, blow her up.

Why did he do it, Elliot? To find out the location of the rebel base, that is the whole point of one of the most famous scenes of the movie where Grand Moth, Tarkin, forces the confession out of her by threatening to blow up Alder on. If you just killed her, he would not have gotten that vital piece of information. If that's not enough, later in the same episode,

Elliot claims that the movie takes place over the course of a few days. Elliot, how long do you think it takes to travel from one planet to another? As a rule, in Star Wars, the Millennium Falcon was considered the fastest no ship, but even the Falcon going at top speed would take a few days to make from Tatooine to Alderan. More importantly, the Death Star is much better.

There's literally nothing in the movie to support that reading. There's nothing in the movie to support the reading, and it takes them more than a day to get there. More? What about the Star Wars? There's initials, more, more, more. Literally continuing the conversation that they had at the beginning. More importantly, the death of ourself is much slower. It only has a class four hyperdrive compared to the Millenium Falcons class 0.5. That's all explained in movie.

We're practical purposes. This means that even if the distance between the shattered remains of Aldron and and Yavin are the same as Alderan and Tatooine, and only took the Falcon a few days to get there, we were taking the Death Star eight times as long, and they would have been able to only start traveling once the signal from the tracking beacon made it back to the Death Star in unknown duration of time. Maybe I'll say this. Maybe I got to turn off by the fact that everyone only has one set of clothes to the point that when Han Solo returns as an old man, he is wearing the same outfit that he wore in this movie. But there's no evidence on screen to make us believe that time has passed.

This is a movie that very tradition that very clearly uses wipes to suggest the passage of time and does not really do that so much in those scenes. But also when Darth Vader's going after Princess Leia, they're just trying to get the plans to Death Star. Why do they care? They don't care. The only reason they care about the Rebel base is because it's got the death, they've got the Death Star plans, right? Maybe not actually. Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I mean, but also it's kind of stop paying attention. Oh, this kid like, like, this is signed to mark a little bad ass last name with house. Oh, I guess it's, but it is true that it is true that

Princess Leia being the only of, the only rebel who leaves home to go do anything, which they would have to ask her where the base is because there's no other rebels in the universe that we see. So. I just want to go on the record and be safe very clearly that I don't know anything about

Star Wars. Well, I don't know why you would make that choice. You can get into arguments like this. Anybody want to come at me? You're right. I don't know anything. How long it takes for a fictional spaceship to get from one fictional planet to another fictional planet, especially when we've been shown in the movie that that spaceship has

the ability to jump through hyperdrive into from one planet to another very easily. So. Yeah. But anyway, he makes a good point. I don't know anything about Star Wars. No, it's getting so fucking defensive here. I don't know why you take your lumps. That's what I'm saying. It's got to do it. I just got to take those lumps. That's like it up, dude. I think what it is is that this is what it shows me is there is nothing I will ever have a complete enough command of that someone will not be able to be like, what it shows me is there's nothing I will ever have a complete enough command of that someone will not be able to be like, what about this thing?

And I'll be like, I didn't think I cared about this, but now suddenly I do. Can they break down the whole, uh, licks to get to the center of a tootsie pop controversy because I really need some answers there. Well, the thing is, there's no, it's not within the canon commercial, but if you read the novelizations, you're saying that there's a lot more going on with the licks that that in in owl cultures, a bite counts as a lick. So, but it's a special extra lick you get after the third lick, which doesn't count as a lick. Anyway, that's just. Who did that novelization? Was it R.A. Salvatore? It was the alan dean fostering still are the Disney about about getting which royalty payments for it

which is disgusting on their part uh... so so dan any other and it letters challenging me uh... the biggest nonsense possible no no no more nonsense letters uh... so let's close up the mailbag you know what i rescind my song forget it i'd that i'm not sure if i'm not it's no longer the most letterful time of the year or a year. Forget it. Um, hey, let's recommend some movies that you might want to watch instead of this, uh, piece of garbage. No, it's got its moments. Um, Dan, don't worry. You don't have to defend.

You don't know, you don't have to soft pedal about it. I suddenly just felt bad for John Lithgow. Well, you know, who is don't be he got paid for it. He's he's doing he's doing fine. If this was his last role, but he's had he's had a long career. He does also stuff. He says when he goes to England, this is the movie that people tell them they love him in. Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah, go figure. I imagine that's why he played Winston Churchill on the crowd. I mean, he was like, I am going to make England think of other things about me. Yeah, I mean, he's giving a Panto performance. I think that's the best defense you can do for what he's doing.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think he is giving, I give, he's giving exactly the performance that a movie called Santa Clause, the movie is calling for it. It's in its villain, you know. I would like to recommend a couple days ago, I left the house, I went villain, you know. I would like to recommend, a couple days ago I left the house, I went out, I saw licorice pizza, the new pizza.

It's a delicious movie. It is a, it's a movie that is, despite being in many ways the simplest story, very hard to describe. Like it is filled with loosely connected incidents, and it is mostly dependent on mood, and it feels totally unpredictable while not doing anything particularly crazy at any point, but it just feels organic. It's a nice vibe to hang out in.

I don't know, it's a movie that kind of was like, made me think like, oh yeah, movies can be like this. They can do this thing too. And I enjoy it. I mean, there, it has depictions of racism It has depictions of racism and it has romance kind of between a 15-year-old boy and a 25-year-old woman, but not really like a full-fledged romance, but like... Keep rationalizing? No, I'm just saying. I think we're so on daystand.

I think we're so on daystand. Things, in case these are things that viewers are sensitive to. Okay. But I don't think that the movie is... I don't know. The movie's great. Okay. I just want to make sure that people are informed if they...

Yeah. If that's something that would bother them. But I really loved it. Can't wait to see it. I'm going to recommend two quick reviews that you can find at your local video store. Just go to the blank of the blank section. The first one is Blade of the Immortal. It is the somewhat recent live action adaptation of the popular manga directed by the one, the

only to Keshe Miyake, Hell yeah baby. And it is like two and a half hours long, but it feels like it goes super fast. I read the comics like back in like high school and I love them. And it was kind of fun remembering those and seeing how well, like, elements from those stories were all kind of crammed together in this movie. And, of course, Keshe Miyake found, like, the wackiest, creepiest characters from the book and made sure that they looked exactly like that in the movie. And it's got a great score. It's just great. I highly recommend it if you like Samurai stuff. And the other movie I'm going to recommend is Climate of the Hunter from director Mickey Reese. It is this little micro budget thriller

about two women who are living it like a vacation property. And they are their sisters and they're catching up and they are catching up with an old friend. And there's a lot of tension and there's a feeling that somebody could be a vampire. Uh oh, but the costumes are great and the performances are really fun. And it's nice and short climate of the hunter thumbs up. You can also get sort of the value and data that section, but we wouldn't necessarily recommend that. Uh huh. Yeah, thank you. And land of the lost. I'm blurbed on the back of the DVD of land. Wow, what did you say? What did they blur view? I don't even remember.

It was like, it was the most sort of like, it's kind of fun. Like it was not a rave review, but apparently they were so desperate for anybody to say anything positive. They like, they got to me somehow. Oh, it says one of these like, just fun in quotes. Kind of, yeah, yeah, it's a very, very short and there's no, there's no verb in there if I recall correctly. I'm recommending, I think there might be possibly a theme to what Alonzo and I are going to recommend possibly if we had talked about it earlier

somewhat. We're recording this just a few days after the death of Steven Sondheim, who you're probably familiar with. If you're not, then you have a real treat in store for you in looking at his work. It's hard to think of someone who's involved in the American theater, and especially the American musical theater, who was more amazing in the breath and quality of his work and more important, especially in the second half of the 20th century.

And so I wanted to recommend a very short movie, because it was meant to be the pilot for a TV series that never happened. That's on Criterion Channel right now, which is called Original Cast Album Company, where it's directed by D. Pennebaker, and you know what that means? It's a documentary with no voiceover,

and you just gotta watch the footage and figure out how it goes together. He's real by D. Penne Baker and you know what that means? It's a documentary with no voiceover and you just got to watch the footage and figure out how it goes together. He's real puzzle master. That's why they used to call him puzzle master penny baker. And so he also used to sell rolls for a penny, which is also why they call him D. A penny baker. And he never knew the answers to anything. So why they call him don't ask Penny Baker. Anyway, so he took his camera crew into watch the recording of the original cast album for the show Company, which is one of Stephen Sombie's big shows. And very much one of the, one of the first musicals to be about like real unhappy things that people go through. And it's just really amazing to watch people, watch

the performers having to perform these songs full tilt in a room with no audience because it's a recording studio and over and over again until the takes are good enough to be on. They keep saying this is the permanent record. This is the permanent record. This gotta be the best take you can do of it. And the highlight being watching Elaine Stritch, who is dressed like Mr. B. Natural from the Mr. Science Theatre Show or Mr. B. Natural, struggling and then finally nailing one of the songs in it. And seeing what's amazing in it to me,

watching it this one, because I was just rewatching it last night, is seeing Stephen Sanheim, who for a decade, my entire life has been basically like the old man of American musical theater and like an institution. Seeing him when he was trying something new and was still somewhat, not more, still somewhat, the young guy who had written the lyrics for West Side Story and Gypsy, not too long before,

and was now very, and is very adamant with the performers about how he wants it done, because this is his career and this is what he's trying to do and who knows if it's going to work or not. So seeing this guy who is now an institution at a time when he was still not struggling necessarily, but creatively pushing was really interesting, inspiring to me. So that's original cast album, Company. And if that documentary sounds vaguely familiar to you because maybe you saw the documentary now parody version of the original cast album co-op, if you buy the Blu-ray that criteria is put out of this movie, it includes the documentary now episode and an interview with all the

people who wrote and performed that and a new interview from the last year, within the last year or two with with Sondheim himself. So as always, I'm about to push the physical media. I guess it's worth hanging on to you if you're a fan of this stuff because it's got a lot of goodies. And yeah, mine is also Sondheim related and is also relatively new on Blu-ray,

Warner Archive Collection just put out the last of Sheila, which Sondheim's career obviously as a genius in the musical theater, unparalleled, but he also really loves sort of puzzles and kind of, you know, would put together these really elaborate sort of scavenger hunts and games at parties for friends.

And he and Anthony Perkins wrote this incredible mystery about a group of Hollywood types, a producer, director, writer, the writer's rich wife, a starlet, her volatile husband, and an agent who all spend a vacation on the producers yacht in the Riviera. They were all present when the producers wife Sheila died one year earlier, and the producer has set up these very complicated games that he thinks is maybe going to sort of suss out who the actual killer is, and then things go in a totally off the rails direction. But it is funny and really like wonderfully complex and complicated the way a good sort

of mystery puzzle game is. And it's the kind of movie where frankly, you'll forget between viewings who the killer even is, and so is all fun to watch over again. But the performances are great. It's like James Coburn and James Mason and Diane Cannon doing basically assume Mangers in personation, if you know who she was, Hollywood super agent of the 70s, who's a riot. Richard Benjamin Rackel Welch in McShane, Joan Hackett. One of my favorite movies, a movie that Ryan Johnson has talked a lot about as being one

of the inspirations for knives out. And you can now get it on Blu-ray. And you should, the last of Sheila. Did you post it a picture, like a caricature of all those characters? Yeah. I was first fell did it when the movie came out. And I had never seen that caricature until after Sondheim died. And I was like, oh my god, because I had this one of my favorite movies. And I'd never seen that caricature until after Sondheim died. I was like, oh my god, because this is one of my favorite movies. And it's somehow I'd never seen that photo before.

The, there's a, one of the first challenges in that that he sets before him. The first puzzle is I find so stressful. And I kept watching that movie. I'm just like, if I, if this puzzle was set before me, and I think it's the first one, maybe I would have just been like, forget it. I can't do this. I'm just going to hang out on the boat like I can't. This is two, this is too complicated for me, but it's a super fun movie. Well, speaking of super fun movies, not this one, but we had a super fun guest. How about that for a second? Wow. Wow. That was a insane way. Yeah. Alonso, do you have anything you want to plug? He just takes your hand

I'm doing Cayman because he is inventing the segue. I need I need to plug Dan McCoy's famous podcaster school or Well, we will be certainly gone from A to Z and A is also the letter that starts our guest name A to Z. And A is also the letter that starts our guest name. A to B. Z. Yes, I have a new book out as Ellie mentioned at the top of the show. I'll be home for Christmas movies. I co-wrote it with the very funny guys over at the Deck the Hallmark podcast. It's got reviews of more than 100 Hallmark Christmas movies,

but from the point of view of three guys who, one of them loves them, one of them likes them, one of them despises them. So however you feel about those films, somebody in the book will have your back also recipes on how to throw your own home art Christmas party, bingo cards, a lot of other fun stuff. I was, I'm really proud of it and happy with how it came out. I think it's a great gift if you have somebody in your life who's super into home works, or likes to dunk on home art movies. I think they'd get a kick out of it. And then I also wrote a book, a while back,

that you can still get called Have Yourself a Movie Little Christmas, which is a guidebook to more films like Santa Claus the movie, but also everything, everything from, you know, Elf to Eyes Wide Shot in terms of films that are set at Christmas, the deal with Christmas. And so that's still out there in the world. And then, yeah, I write for the rap, I'm the film reviews editor there, and I have quite a few podcasts, Linoleum Knife with my husband, Dave White, here on the Maximum Fun Network.

You can hear me on Maximum Film, with If You Waterway, Andrea Clark, and of course, Breakfast All Day with Christie, Limerian, Matt Achtchety. If you used to listen to me on a show called, What the Flick, we're now doing it under the name Breakfast All Day. So please check us out there. And yeah, I'm just always delighted to be on the show,

longtime fan and y'all are always just a blast to hang out with. Well, thanks. Well, you're always a great guest. We'll have love having you. Those are all great podcasts that I would say you should check out. I'm a particular fan of Lennelium knife. That's a favorite of mine. Yeah. This is a new, this is one of our newer traditions and I'm a big fan of it.

Thank you for coming out. We just hope Dudley Moore comes out with a Christmas movie next year. So we can cross for L time through. Yeah. But while we are thanking folks, let's think, uh, Alex Smith. Oh, look, look, look, look at, look at it. Look at thank and signs monster over here just with the Segways. Yeah. Alex Smith, uh, our producer. Hell yeah. Thank you for all the work you do, uh, especially, uh, last week we did a mini, uh, where Stu, uh, ran us through a role playing game where we're cartoon dogs and Alex went above and beyond. Oh, yeah. Uh, Santa Fex and music and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and to check them out, but now for the flop-house, I've been damn a coy. I'm still sewer Wellington.

I'm Ellie Kaelin. Oh, and I'm a Luzod Rowling. Yes. Bye. I guess I'll just do the intro. Why not? Sure. I don't unless, does anyone, unless anyone here objects?

Speak now or forever, shoulder piece? Yeah. Okay. Maximumfun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist-owned, audience supported. dot org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported