The Flop House - Ep.#247 - Inconceivable

Episode Date: December 23, 2017

Merry Cagemas everyone! Reunited and it feels so good -- we recorded this one all together, in Dan's hotel room in San Francisco. What made we of the Cage-light domestic thriller Inconceivable? You'll have to listen to find out. Meanwhile, Stu has photographic recall of Unforgettable, Elliott explains the genealogy of the "O" family, and Dan is just a vast expanse of flesh. Wikipedia synopsis for Inconceivable Movies recommended in this episode The Verdict The Devil's Candy The Furies

On this episode of the Flap House we discuss... Inconceivable! The story of the making of the Princess Bride. You wish... K-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k- Hey everyone and welcome to the flop house. All right Stuart. Not even knowing that I got picked up on microphone because of the way we're saying but uh Stuart opened up a can. Yeah as Dan said that. Right when I was talking. Now you might think it's a beer

But it's not to look Roy because we're recording this on a Saturday morning in beautiful San Francisco in Dan's hotel room Dan had to uh had to usher out a bevy of babes uh yeah that's right. It was just like in Rubble Cop of babes. Yeah, that's right. It was just like in Robocop when you know that bitches leave scene, but Dan was much more respectful. Yeah, 2017, dude. He said bitches, could you kindly see yourselves to the exit? Okay. And they said, yeah, if you could see us now, we're all huddled around a tiny hotel room table. We're the huddled masses that the statue of Liberty was talking about. Yeah. I guess a bunch of guys in a hotel room table. We're the huddled masses that the statue of Liberty was talking about. Yeah. I guess. A bunch of guys in a hotel room in San Francisco.

Three white guys who are more here. But it's great to see you guys in the flesh again. After a while. Yeah, I mean, I should probably put some clothes on. No, no, I'm loving seeing all this flesh. Just this bare expanse of flesh. Mm-hmm, it's very... Throwing and burging in.

Yeah, I mean, it's a one-hair. You turn the heat way down here. So we should probably take all of our clothes off. Not just you. Because the heat got turned way... Oh, so we can see our body. Yeah, body heat. Yeah, yeah.

Grab our cells up and one of those aluminum foil blankets they sell outside of marathons. Yeah, be one of those snake balls that were in the middle of the desert with a snake saw coil together for a key. Is that what they're doing? I thought so they could like roll around and be faster. Maybe. I mean, in the looney tunes world-wise, we play. So what do we do on this podcast, Dan?

Well, what we do is we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it. Okay. Dan's losing his mind. And what bad movie do we talk about it. Okay, Dan's losing his mind. And what bad movie do we talk about this time, Dan? We watched inconceivable because it's cage-miss and this movie has Nicholas Cage in it, sort of. That's right guys, it's the happiest time of the year, cage-miss. The time of year when we celebrate our dear, I'm a sci-i, I guess you can call him Nicholas Cage, Star Wars. Last but not least. Star Wars is not for me, let me guess it is for me Cage. Star of the... Star is not for me.

Let me guess it is for me too. Star of such films as... Stolen. Vampires Kiss. Stolen. Stolen. The rock. Faced off.

Faced lash off. Yeah, it's trespass. Red Rock West. Seven Sun. Honeymoon in Vegas. Zanderly. Yeah. And so forth. Captain Correlli's Mandolin. West, uh, seven sun honeymoon in Vegas, uh, Zanderly, uh, and so forth.

Captain Correlli's Mandolin. I think that's the one Nigglass cage movie no one has ever seen. I'm not even sure it's not just a poster. I just imagine the whole thing is like, Hey, that's a Captain of Correlli's Mandolin. And to answer. You guys have seen him. I'm a mandolin.

It's mine. Captain of Correlli, that's me. I hope that it opens with, there's a tourist goes to a junk shop in Italy and sees a mandolin and it's like, oh, it's very nice. And the junk show and it was, ah, you found a demanda-lin. And there's a quiet hotel that goes away

with that instrument. And the tourists is like, I'm actually more interested in that magwa you have in a box over there. I don't want to beat them out, but I'm in there. I'm going to tell you. Italian grandma. I wish there was a rip off movie. And I called Italian grandma's where they go to Italian junk shop in Little Italy and find this magwa. Dan, what would the rules be for an Italian grandma? You have to feed them after midnight, because Italian food's delicious.

Yeah, like a belly-pumped character would be like, man, jamanja. Don't spill all the oil on other magma. Now we're getting to racist territory, I guess, or I am. Anyway, Italian grandma is everybody photoshopped. Let's see what that would look like. Yeah. So inconceivable, is that about a Gremlin?

No, it's a thriller about conceiving. So now this is listed as a Nicholas Cage movie, but it's really more of a Gina Gershon movie, which I did not have a problem with. No, no, she's great. She's great, I'm a big fan. But the weird thing about this movie was it's the kind of the photo-negative of unforgettable. The Catherine Hygge Rosary adult movie we did a few episodes ago.

Wait, we watch that movie? I must have forgotten. Oh! Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, we're all dead now. So whereas unforgettable was a movie about a normal, perfectly nice woman moving into a new family and the ex-wife becoming a murderous monster. This is about a perfectly normal family with a nice wife where a murderous monster enters in. Okay. So let's set the scene. The movie begins with a number of production company logos, which is I'm soon learning there's two ways you can tell a low budget movie. Yeah. One, a shit ton of production company logos.

If there's a lot of production logos, you're either watching a foreign film that has been picked up for distribution in America where you're watching a low-budget movie. Or, and this is the other thing, a lot of time-filled with helicopter shots, which I recently learned are just drone shots. You just hire a drone and you rent it out and just have it fly over a location and it looks like you spend a lot of money on helicopter shots. And so you don't even have to buy the drone,

you can just rent it. Just rent it, dude. Just rent it. And like, do they have a guy who takes a walk around the drone to make sure that there's no dings and dents? You have to hire a guy who's kind of like quint from jaws to fly the drone. I'll get your helicopter shots.

Oh, it's like when my friend got married. He got married in like a semi-traditional Indian wedding ceremony in Queens. And part of the ceremony involved my friend riding down the street in Jackson Heights on a white horse. And there's this fucking awesome like leathery, uh, carny type fellow who was the horse handler. Who's just standing there like, I don't remember him wearing a shirt underneath that vest. He must have.

It was like walking there like holding the bridle of the horse the whole way down. So my image now is, and I know the friend you're talking about, he is sitting on a white horse dressed in traditional Indian wedding clothing, where as Danny Trejo leads the horse down the street, he suggests in heights, wearing just a vest with no shirt underneath. Yep, it was pretty great. And then afterwards he had to wrestle the bride's father. No, they did like a fake wrestling on the stairs of the temple. Yeah, it was awesome. I've totally lost the thread of what's happening. We're talking about inconceivable. Oh, okay. This is one of those many movies that takes place in a kind of generic,

very rich, upper middle class house. We start there in a, actually, you know what? We don't end up, there's a wealthy house, we start in a generic upper middle class home, where a woman is comforted in a crying baby. She's trying, she's obviously in hurry. She's trying to escape before a man comes home, we're led to believe it's her husband. She's too late, he shows up and goes, what do you see with angry?

And I'm assuming because she's wearing a very obvious dark-haired wig, the old. It doesn't help that she's wearing a wig. She's wearing a wig and she's wearing a very obvious dark-haired wig. The whole time. Doesn't help that she's wearing a wig. She's wearing a wig and she's wearing a baby and a baby beower, and as if it's like a bulletproof vest. He starts strangling her and she stabs him and the baby's crying the whole time. And she's stabbing him out with a crying baby

strapped her chest, which is hard to do. And he dies and she goes, what have I done? Cut to Nicholas Cage's jogging. Oh yeah, he stops by, he walks past his motorcycle, parked outside of his polatial mansion. And his wife. It hovers on the, the, the Harley Davidson logo on the motorcycle

and you're like, they paid for this to be the movie. And it's also like, you're like, can't wait to see Nick Cage chase someone on that chopper, on that hog. Never happens. The Arley Davidson's like, we could put our Harley Davidson in the Avengers or we could do it in Inconceivable. I think Inconceivable is gonna be the big hit this year.

Yeah, that's that's that's that's that's where they're two options. They were like Marble Man, which of the big movies is gonna be it is gonna be bigger Avengers are conceivable. And Marble Man was like Harley Davidson put it into the Inconceivable movie. Nobody's gonna see what Marvel Man was like. Harley Davidson put it into the same movie. Nobody's gonna wanna watch a superhero movie. Really? Because Captain America rides a motorcycle.

It's kind of a organic perfect. Like, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't do that. Wait, he rides a organic motorcycle? Yeah, because he's made out of cable. That's cool. Cable the superhero who's made a techno-organic metal. Yeah. It's not made Cable is a superhero who's made of Techno-Organic metal. Not it. It's not made out of like that gold mobile photography.

Yeah, you don't think that's why those are expensive when you buy them from a radio shaker, right? It's because they're made out of like human body parts. Yeah, because you got a girl. Yeah, I thought it was that Captain America video drum crossover that we've had. Oh, finally, that was all I've been wanting. Anyway, Nicholas Cage and his wife, Geneggar, is on their both doctors, although she is a stay-at-home mom now, who used to be a doctor and misses her career.

That motorcycle is there because I assume Nicholas Cage, they had a car for his character dry, and he said, no, no, no, my character rides a motorcycle. I'll just bring mine in. It's character Brian. Yeah, he walks in. There's that as if that's a ridiculous event. There is no world where Nicholas Cage is named Brian.

There's also no world, according to this movie, where Nicholas Cage is named Brian. There's also no world according to this movie where Nicholas Cage brushes his hair. It's like they paid him so little they're not even willing to brush his hair for the movie. Yeah, he's about to power up and reach his final form. The man is aging so I don't want to make fun of him. But Nicholas Cage does not look well in this movie. No, and he's very, he's very, uh, not in a shot in a very non-complementary way. No, no, no, he's very unflattering.

He's talking for almost everybody in the movie. Yeah. Like Gina Gershund is a beautiful woman and the movie does not shoot her particularly flattering. No. No. But, uh, Faye Dunway looks great. Faye Dunway actually does look great in this movie, but we'll get to Faye Dunway.

Anyway, they're both doctors. They have a beautiful life with their young daughter. And they just, and every scene with Nicholas Cage, he's discussing like, you have just some, he's just ad libbings. There's a point where he's just talking about purple rain for some reason and how it's about being a dad. But anyway, yeah, that's true.

Wait, are you saying that wasn't written into this script? I don't believe that. The same way, I remember when the rock came out, Nicholas Cage was like, I brought a lot to the character. Like, it was my idea that he's a big Beatles fan. So, all right, really informed the character now. Yeah, also like the biggest man in the world. I just gotta tell who he is.

I gave him this unique thing of liking the only band that everybody in the world likes. Yeah. Gene Gershine again. It's your classic family. Two doctors, one is now stay at home on Mr. Work, the other is a motorcycle riding Prince fan. And at a park, Gina is hanging out with another, with I guess her trainer or it's kind of,

trainer best friend. And who runs a mommy and me class. And the trainer who's like apparently like a wrestler, like a female wrestler and Her other like I totally buy that because she does not look like a regular human being No, it doesn't See her friend who is a busty fitness trainer introduces her to Katie another mom at the park and they end up this She looks pretty familiar to the she looks pretty similar to the woman in that opening call open scene.

And yeah, she's wearing a wig. So it can't be the same person. It can't be. Because the woman in the opening scene was obviously wearing a wig. Was wearing a shitell as an orthodox Jewish woman. And that's why such a bad wig because shitell tend not to be the best wigs. Do you think that leads a lot of men to having weird Shytle fetishes? Oh, for sure.

There must be so many Orthodox men who get turned on by... War non-Orthodox men. We're not Orthodox men who live in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, or other heavily Orthodox areas. This woman by the way, played by Nikki Whalen. Yeah, yeah, just got up. Now who's Nikki Whalen?

She was his co-star and left behind, right? Was she? Yeah, according to IMDB. I remember that Yeah, yeah. Now who's Nicky Whalen? She was his co-star in left behind, right? What's she? Yeah, according to IMDB. I remember that character. Yeah, I mean, they don't have any scenes together in left behind, right? Or maybe they have one or two. No, I thought she was like the pilot and she's the passenger, right?

No, I thought she was the, isn't she the one that? She the flight attendant is in a fairyland. I think that's it. Oh, okay. Also, I remember so much more about left behind. Also, IMDB's also also mention that the Director really wanted her role to be played by Lindsay Lohan Wow But for whatever reason get well

I'm just busy being like a Turkish prostitute, which I guess is what she does now what like there's rumors that Lindsay Lohan is now like a high-priced call girl. Did you, what? Do you watch on a TMZ? I get this from Turkish MZ. I get this from my co-worker, Elle's former co-worker, Lauren Sarvermeans, who is plugged into all sorts of celebrity gossip. Yeah, she is the only person I know who is on top of what the teens are into and has also dogwalk walks stocked Dana Perino

in Central Park in New York. Anyway. I mean, I think I'm guessing what happened was that the director wanted and the financeers were like, she's unrolly of that. Yeah. Let's ask Paul Schrader how his shooting experience with her went.

Now, Paul Schrader, you're a crazy person. And you had trouble where he can live the lowhand? Yes, I did. All right, So we'll just set you aside. Anyway, but so she's introduced to her this chance meetup that I guess is not a chance meetup because the fitness trainer wanted to introduce the two of them. Yeah. Introduced as if they ran into each other in the park. This turns into a mommy hangout slash play date where the mom user drink and wine while the kids are are playing and everybody passes out asleep.

There's a gas leak right? I guess it looks like. I don't know the most robotic dialogue too. I love it. I love it. It does not come to you. That trainer's dialogue feels like we've described dialogue like this before but it feels like it was originally English and then they translated into Russian and then they translated

it back to English and like she had to read it backwards and then they just played it forward. It's crazy. Essentially a plot device with boobs. So a lot of her dialogue is just moving things along but yeah, it is, it does feel like it was written by someone who English is not even a fourth language. Oh, it's so good. You look at what Joseph Conrad, where English was, I think, his third language, it was capable of with writing in English, beautiful writing, really getting to the heart of what it means to be a man in conflict

with both the sea and also with imperialism, but also beholden to imperialism, and you compare that to the script. I guess what I'm saying is the screenplay to inconceivable does not reach the height of Joseph Conrad working in Nostromo, or Jim Jim, but what are you gonna do? You know, now let me just say one thing, it seems very unrealistic that two women with kids would suddenly meet at the park and become best friends.

This is not unrealistic as I've learned, the way to get any woman's phone number and the guys listen to this, okay? Here's a secret, if you want to get the game, the way to get any woman's phone number is to be to this okay here's a secret if you want to get the game the way to get any woman's phone number is to be a mom with a kid and for that woman also to be a mom with a kid well it's a big commitment but I guess I'll do it Dan you need you to transition and get a child yeah because I've seen my wife get the digits of so many random women because they happen to have kids also and they're looking everyone's trolling for play dates. Let's just say what it is. All moms are pimps for play dates for their kids.

Let's just say it how it is. Let's not mince words. My wife is always like checking out other moms and their kids to see if it's proper. I feel like we stumbled into a goddamn Dana Carvey bit. And then church lady walks it. Oh no. As I'd say, that's not right.

That's Kevin Meeney, resident piece. That's not Dana Carvey. Anyway, they Katie just the Katie is the wife is the mother of this other girl that has now become Jean Gershon's best friend in an hour. And as soon as Nicholas Cage goes to bed, Katie's ice blue eyes open. Uh oh, the next morning. Yeah, what, wait, were her eyes not blue before? They were not. So she took her colored contacts out? Or did she, is she on the fucking spice? She has, she, well, I think it's a combination of blue contacts, which we see her putting in later,

and she's a spice addict. Yeah, okay, that makes sense. She can reshape space and time. I mean, the, the fact is, she might not be an addict, she may just have grown up on a raccoast, and there's so much spice in the atmosphere that you become addicted to. Yeah, no, I get it. And your eyes turned blue. Product of environment. She may just have grown up on a raccoise and there's so much spice in the atmosphere that you become addicted to.

Yeah, no, I get it. And your eyes turned blue. Product of environment. The next morning they find that Katie has made breakfast for everybody. She also turns out to be a man. Why you never see her go to the bathroom too because she's always going in the stilest she's playing. And still she's drinking it.

Yeah. She appears to be a master face painter and a professional house painter, but what she really wants to paint is murals for kids bedrooms. And by murals, I mean, the same fucking mural of the African Savannah with one big tree in it that we see her paint in several different rooms throughout the course of the film and becomes a clue later on.

It's like, lady, if you wanna cover your tracks, learn how to paint a second mural. That's all I'm gonna say. Maybe she saw it in like a dream quest or something. Like, she also hates having her photo taken, which is always a sign of someone with nothing to hide. Now, Nicholas Cage gets a little fun micro speech about mumbling lawns.

Another I assume Cage ad lib, as they have one of several big... I could mow a lawn for hours. Yes. Great, very impressive. I thought you were Sean Conner. The second baby rovershover. I found the cure for mowing lawns and I lost it.

Like you eat a peach? Yeah, the cure is to plant natural plants that are drought resistant and you have mostly pebbles instead of grass. You never have to mow it occasionally, you bring in a garden on a cliff. Which one's that? Which is that Nicholas Cage? Not sure anymore. Well, it's me and Jimmy Stewart. I found the cure for cancer, but I lost it.

Okay, is that about a loss? I'm broke, I hear. I'm having lost the cure for cancer. Anyway, that's me. If you want to invite me to impersonate any of these people at an event, please don't. I'm not that good at it. I would end up giving you your money back. So this is one of, we see one of several large outdoor family

backyard lunches, which are attended by Faye Dunnoway, Nicholas Cage's mother, in the movie, not in real life guys. Come on. Or else his name would be Nicholas Dunnoway. And Faye Dunnoway gives Katie a compliment or a cooking by saying that Gina, she's a girl, she's care's character Angie cannot cook. Uh oh. And but Katie turns into a compliment for Angie. Oh,

but she's so great at everything else. It's, you know, this is my one thing. What a beautiful scene. One of the things I like about this scene is later on, somebody's looking at a, I think Gina Gershans looking at like a collection of family photos and a shot from this lunch. It is one of those. Who's taking the picture? That's the thing I find weird. A drone? I think I find weird about the scene is like.

The one thing? Well, besides the fact that it seems to be a lunch where no food is being eaten. One of the things I find weird about the scene is like, later on, almost immediately after this, they'd done a way of like, I don't like that, Katie. Like, she's suspicious. There's something weird about the scene is like later on almost immediately after this, they done a way like, I don't like that Katie, like she's suspicious. There's something weird about her. And I'm like, dude, why were you just like complimenting her and throwing shade at Gina

Gershahn if this is like what your feelings are? Now here's how. It's the delegate dance of social situations, Dan. Let me explain how mothers-in-law work. They don't like the women who have married their sons because they've taken the place of the main woman in law work. Okay. They don't like the women who have married their sons because they've taken the place of the main woman in their life then. So what she's doing is she's like,

I don't like this woman. But you know who I don't like more? I might say, my daughter-in-law. So I'm gonna use this woman as a tool to get at my daughter-in-law. And later, I'll get at this woman. It's a real game of Thrones type thing. Your ally becomes your enemy because you've got a larger enemy. Oh, it's only a play date. You're really pretty.

I'm real bad here. Pretty, pretty old fashion over here. Anyway, so then the mother and then fade out away gets on her broom and flies away. No, I'm a classic mother-in-law, bitch. No, she tells Nicholas Cage that woman gives me the willies. And then Katie sees a knife and flashes back to the stabbing we saw earlier in the movie as if we needed any evidence that this is one in the same person. Their faces are identical. But maybe they're like, when we're wearing a wig. And they have different colored eyes. Katie opens up and tells Gina Gershon that she had an abusive husband. And Gina Gershon opens up and says they had trouble conceiving and finally had to use a surrogate, but no, he had to use a donor egg and she had a lot

of bad postpartum depression and that put her on, and she had an addiction to medication after that. And you know what? Now they got through it and everything's okay and Gene Gershon says, hey, I'm pregnant but Nicholas Cage doesn't know it yet. Uh-oh, looks like they're going to have two in this family. So wait, so we, okay, so there's a, there's a, there's a Chink and Gina Gershon's armor at this point. Is that she? We know she had, actually, is it at this point?

At some, we learned that she had a past history of drug abuse, postpartum depression, that she had trouble conceiving it was later in life. This is something that affects a lot of women and what also affects a lot of women. She's that mommy in me class and has the most oblique miscarriage I've ever seen in the history of film. I've missed it entirely.

Yeah, I missed it too. I think if I was not, this is one of those times where it's like if I was not keyed into the fact that miscarriages are very common, often not talked about because there's an unnecessary, in fact, totally uncalled for amount of shame attached to them, which there should not be. Something that affects many, many women is a natural part of often the conception process. But that she just goes, oh, I'm not feeling well. Oh, let me help you.

Oh, can someone help cut to the next scene and we're just supposed to know that she's no longer pregnant, that she's lost, that she's lost the baby yet? And I don't really stage this thing. And again, early stages and pregnancy, it's very common for this. That's not, and that's not TV and movie shorthand yet for, for that kind of thing. Not like how, if at any point a woman throws up in a movie or TV, you're like, oh, I guess she's pregnant. And if someone coughs,

and then there's a little blood in the handkerchief, you're like, they're gonna be dead. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or the way that. They shouldn't have gotten bit by that zombie. If it's TV movie shorthand, that if you go into a magic cave and you see an armored figure

and you cut the armored figure's head off, and inside the mask is your own face, it means that you're dead. Oh, okay. Yeah, that's just TV movies. Yeah, classic shorthand, yes. They all know this hallmark, hall-up-ing movies where lizard creatures that are mentoring you send you into magic caves.

Yeah, I mean, actually tell you not to go into that magic cave. You think that's lazy, right? You'd be like, oh, that's lazy storytelling, but it's just like such a part of the culture that you just, it's just easier. You know what, there's a reason some stereotypes exist, you know. Magic Caves, they tell you who your dad is.

Anyway, she said she wanted to finally give Nicholas Cage a son. And Katie says, you know what? I'm moving. And Gina Gershant says, no, no, no, let us hire you as a live in Nanny. And Faye Dunway does not like this. This is a decision that is made very quickly. They have known her for a week. Well, but also like Katie's like, I'm gonna know go on I'm this new job. I'm gonna go to

Calrano. It's all decided and they just hector her for like a minute and she's like you know what I will stay around fuck that job. But why is he isn't even discussed? Yeah. Well no, but she gets free room and board. Her daughter now has a live in best friend. Uh, they, their house seems to live on, be in a national, national park. They have so much open air space and they eat at a picnic table. I mean, two doctors. Right. They are two doctors, just like in that cabaret song.

Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. Anyway, uh, nosy fade on a way does some more snooping. Uh, and there's that scene where she's like using the internet right and just snooping away. Yeah, she logs on to snoop it that. Yep. She keeps saying Siri and hands. And he has what? She puts on her VR goggles and walks down the hall and opens up a VR file cabinet. Yeah. But then, uh, and then virtualosity jumps out. And gets into the real world. That's, like, so virtualosity does. Yeah. You ever had those times when you just want to Google somebody, but you have to fight the lawnmower man. And he's like, I have your search results.

More info power. Anyway, Nicholas Cage tries putting the moves on Gene Gershon one night, but she's not ready, which is understandable. He goes outside to watch Fourth of July Fireworks and who's swimming topless in just her panties? Katie. Well, she's living in there like, they're like,

they're what they're, how? They're getting out. I'm sorry to say about the scene, which is, yep. It is totally gratuitous toplessness because, you think that this is gonna pay off later. You think that's a real poison ivy news adoption? Yeah, you think that Nicholas Cage is gonna be seduced by this new, uh, Antrolooper.

And that does not happen at all in the movie. Nicholas Cage remains totally faithful to Gene Gershon, the entire film. It's kind of like that movie obsessed that we reviewed with... In the Selbon. In the Selbon Beyonce and... Alley Larder.

Yeah, and you're like, at no point is it ever possible that he would be seduced by Alley Larder? No, he's married to Beyonce. But like, even with that, there's like no moment where that even could possibly happen. It was indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy-indy- put the moves on him and he's like, nope. And then she's like, oh, now I'm gonna send pictures of my, I don't know. I know, well, that's... It's weird that I don't remember that move. It is, it is.

It's very weird, yeah. Anyway, and I wanna say that when I heard the title of this movie is inconceivable, I was like, that'd be a pretty bad taste if it was about conceiving a child. That's entirely what it's about. It's a fairly bad taste title. Anyway, so anyway, that seed is planted.

Nicholas Cage has seen Katie's boobs, a seed that will never bear fruit. Jean-Jean Chantchev's go to work, and Katie walks around the house in classic, imagining her life was my lifestyle, looking at all her clothes and things. So she's going back to work, and Katie seems oddly distressed that her friend is going

to be going back to work and wants somebody to look after her daughter. What you're too is that immediately Katie is not doing her job looking after her daughter or the family's daughter. She's just walking on the house where I saw. But yeah, she doesn't like the idea that she's instead of being a stay at home mom, Gina Kershaw is going to go back to work and have what a stranger watching your child? Mm-hmm. Very old-fashioned conservative view of things. Gina Gershaw comes home to see Katie having sex with someone.

We don't see who it is. And of course we assume it's Nick Cage. It's Nicholas for stuff. Yeah, it's amazing. You think it's good, but uh, and fade on a way we learn is taking the girls to the beach. And that's why they weren't there. I'm glad I'm glad you wrote that down. You're fucking nuts. Katie says, are you, are you mad because you caught me in bed with another woman? And Gina Gertian's like, oh, uh, yeah. I guess, uh, I mean, I guess that that changes their friendship a little maybe.

I don't know. It's also makes it loaded. I mean, it's a little weird. I mean, it's, here's the boundaries that it's hard to figure out. Katie now lives in their guest house, and she needs to have a life outside of being a nanny. That's true. But if I had a living nanny and found that she was bringing someone

I'd never met home to have sex with on my property, I would feel a little weird about it, especially in the middle of the day. never met home tab sex with on my property, I would feel a little weird about it, especially in the middle of the day. Yeah, when only dirty people have sex. I guess. What if my child is gonna wander in on the nanny having sex with somebody?

She was at the beach, she wrote a down your nose. And then you're gonna come over the beach. You're like, it's natural, that's how you were created. How long you think Faye Dennolly can stand up to the harsh sunlight of the beach. He's not taking them for a day-long trip. Come on. But Kate is always supposed to go to the other person's apartment. That gets so old. You're right. Yeah. And they're like right by a pool.

So what does that mean? It's natural sex place. That's a natural habitat for Americanos fornicatus by wetlands or pools. So they can what have a sip of chlorine water afterwards at the long. Yeah, they like to dose. I don't know. Stuff off of this stuff. Now that she says it was a female coworker, Gina Grishon never says, Hey, wait a minute, you work as a nanny. Who was your coworker?

But, uh, but, uh, and Kate goes, you didn't think that was Brian. Did you and Gina Grishon's like, No, no, of course not. And that night Gina has sex with her husband. They could list Cage. She is both wants to reclaim him because she's worried. And also, maybe she was a little turned on by Katie's free wheeling casual daytime sex. Mm-hmm.

Who knows? Uh, Grant, that's Grant. Uh, so then, Angela, uh, uh, Jeep Angie and their mutual friend who introduced them, whose name is what? Linda? This is that fitness roll that we were talking about. Linda, I think it is Linda. Maybe Lisa.

Oh, no, Linda, okay. So Linda's by herself jogging down the beach in a bikini top. This happens for a while. Yeah. And then it turns out she and Katie are lovers. She was the one who is in bed with Katie. What?

And she- One of the only characters introduced to us. And she tells Katie, they're gonna try for another kid. They wanna use a surrogate and they ask,'re gonna guys guys guys you're right. It was Linda Okay, thanks. Thanks for that fact check momentary fact check Rechade it. Yep, you're welcome. Yes, so so anyone who's gonna put a pants on fire or Pinocchio ward on me Don't do it. So Linda says they're gonna have no child that they want to use a surrogate and they're gonna ask me. Katie is

instantly envious. Linda goes for a swim in a lake and then Katie wades into the water and her underwear and just stands there not saying anything. Linda takes this to me. So weird, weird scene. And and Katie goes that the egg the egg donor that was me. That was babies babies are mine I had to steal and I already had to steal my daughter away from my own surrogate and now they're she's going back to work and I take care of my baby and Linda's like that's fucked up and so Katie hits her with something really heavy and kills her and she gets well to it's a dumbbell isn't we yeah I don't know a dumbbell but I was like why did she bring a dumbbell with her just because her yeah it's a dumbbell. Is it? I thought it was a dumbbell, but I was like, why did she bring a dumbbell with her?

Just put her on the couch. Yeah, it's part of a worker beach. Yeah, I don't know. So, yeah, no notice, yeah, yeah, no did work her out or Ellie came on. Let me, you know what, I have all these heavy dumbbells. Let me lug them to the beach. I mean, that's part of the workout in and of itself.

All right, good for you. And I'm pretty sure during this big reveal speech, because this is like, this is the, yeah, we don't want it. It's only half a reveal. We don't want to gloss over this. Like, we want to make it very clear. What, what are you saying? We don't want to gloss over this. The way we glossed over Gina Gershon's first child comes from Katie's egg. Yes. So, so Katie is at the birth mother. No, not birth mother, but she's the egg donor. And so she feels like it is her child.

Yeah, and I'm pretty sure during this whole reveal, the background music is this like soft acoustic guitar stuff, which is non-diogenic. I'm assuming there's nobody sitting in the next play. Maybe they brought a guitar player over. There's a guitar player like, a male brook style. I found this scene genuinely kind of creepy, There's a guitar player like

I've found this scene genuinely kind of creepy though because it just like the way that Katie like kind of wades out and doesn't say anything and then she like Kills her lover and like drowns her in the in the way this was if the movie had kept up this level it would have been a really creepy movie. Yeah That's all I wanted to say about that. You can never underestimate the creepiness of someone standing there and looking at you and not saying anything. Yeah. She's just standing in the water and under wear shivering, not saying anything to Linda.

Linda's like, what are you doing? This is freaking me out. You're upset with me? What's going on? And it's very creepy. And I'm remembering the scene of her sitting there holding herself in her arms. Where's the dumbbell?

Is there like a crab holding in it? She'd waited out before I put it in the water just to show what they're saying. You have to assume that she's got a dumbbell just in the back of her panties. I guess so. Who can she pulls it out, Bugs Bunny's style? that she's got a dumbbell just in the back of her panties. Like this. Look at this. She pulls it out, Bugs Bunny's style. And her butt is a tesseract at home. Any number of unlimited objects.

I mean, sometimes I feel that way about my own butt, Elliot. But you do raise a good question. Where was that dumbbell? Maybe it was. Which makes me believe maybe it was like a floating log or something that she found. It looks like a dumbbell. It just shaped exactly like a tomb, though. Yeah, there's a million monkeys at a million typewriter. Yeah, I guess it's fair.

It makes sense, yeah. Good happen. She took it from a crab that was working out. So Linda's body is discovered the next day by two people just walking along the beach, lawn order style. Katie. Boating accident, right? That's what it's really official. A strange boating accident. And later on they have in

memoriam card and photo of her on refrigerator. That is such a over-makeup like Kim Kardashian type photo and a very weird choice for an in-memoriam card. Very much the kind of photo that would be attached to a bartender's resume that would send me a resume. It feels like it's the kind of photo that would be attached to a bartender's resume that would send me a resume. It feels like it's the kind of photo that would be used on the billboard for a strip club. Okay. I feel like a weird choice for an in-memory. I mean, think you'd have something that was a little bit less... vampy? Yeah, vampy. Let's say it. Anyway, Katie, meanwhile, goes back to Nanny and mainly by lounging around in the pool.

And Fay Dunway does not like that Katie we now learn has been asked to be the new surrogate. I mean, we learn by seeing her pregnant, right? No, no, no. She's done away, says, I don't like that you're using her as you're going to use her as the surrogate because Katie at this point has, she's super toned. She, you know, it's got to be either the earliest stage of pregnancy or there's nothing in there because she's just like, yeah. We know there's nothing.

She's like, not as a beauty at you on a time. And Linda, we learned was killed in a voting accident. But anyway, he didn't always like. Yeah, we learned that. That would be hilarious if that, if she actually was died in a voting accident, we just learned it in passing. And the other character, she died in a voting accident. Wait, learned it in passing. And they all had that character, she died in a bunny accident. It was like, wait, did she, did they not pay her enough?

Is she left that way through filming? Like, what, what happened? Fay Dunway says, here's your plan to be. Kick her out when the baby's born, because she's going to want to have visitation and custody rights. And they're like, no way. And I will say this conversation is realistically circular and pointless.

It comes to no conclusion, and they don't do anything. Then Nicholas Cage and Gene Gershon recap that conversation unnecessarily, cut to four months later. Katie is pregnant. And Gina and Angelina, and Gina Gershon, I keep forgetting her character's name, so I'm just calling her Gina in my notes. Here's Katie, take credit for the two girls to a stranger at the playground. Awkward. It's very like, we already Katie is our neighbor. credit for the two girls to a stranger at the playground awkward

It's very like we already The dominoes are starting to fall yeah, she's starting to show possessiveness of Gene Gershon's daughter in a way that Gene Gershon is getting suspicious about yeah They get home and we hear the immortal line. Hey guess what the animal shows on because they couldn't even come up with a fake name for a TV show They go for a medical test and Katie starts calling it. At the animal show? No, no. At the doctors, Katie and Gina are going, and Katie starts calling it my baby. I love the fact that the doctor, Dr. Weissman,

who is checking Katie out, is the only doctor who shows up. In a medical way, not like. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's not like, pull down his sunglasses and look rough down and go, nice. Not that kind of checking her out. Yeah, well, drop dead legs, plays in the background. Yeah, he's the only doctor that we ever seen in the movie, depending on, no matter what the situation is, say, for instance,

somebody gets stabbed by a knife later in the movie. That's the doctor. We're gonna see later on shaking his head sadly. Aside from that one lab tech doctor who does a DNA test for genocursion, is introduced as her other best friend ever. No, he was at that immortal luncheon we were talking about. Oh, that's who that was.

The luncheon that was photographed in place in a frame Totally didn't even recognize him because he's fleeting Like Brian or something no way Why did they name both characters It's a real double life of very neat situation So anyway during the test Katie as a flashback in which she's told by another doctor and Katie it's brown It's brown wigs Katie is told that she has an infection that spreads she can no longer produce any eggs And she wakes up screaming much like the movie I wake up screaming and

Gina Grishon is realistically weird out by the fact that reference then you know I did not But Gina Grishon says the doctor that was right? When she woke up screaming from the test and asked, So I'm like, no, that's very normal. Oh, that no. The way I do this test, it's very painful. And it brings up bad memories. She asked for a prescription for a sedative for Katie.

And now, Dan, there hasn't been a lot of Nicholas Cage in this movie so far. What do you take that to me? I think that they probably gave him enough money to pay half of the property taxes on one of his castles, but not enough to keep him in the movie any longer than that. Now, when we watched Unforgettable, which again is the reverse of this movie, we talked about how much we hated the husband in that movie, and it hurt me a little bit that Nicholas Cage in this movie is that husband Yeah, he's like a motorcycle riding doctor

Lista His never-unforsed family and will soon immediately take a stranger's point of view or side against his own wife And I think Nick don't do it, but I realized, I don't know if there's a single scene of Nicholas Cage talking to another man in this movie. So I think this movie fails the reverse back deltest. Ha ha ha ha. Too bad. Yeah, no, it's, it's true.

Which I guess we call it the Glenn back deltest. Yeah, yeah. So men's rights activists get on this movie. It really didn't actually, the men don't have interior lives that allow them to be in the women. I think you're misrepresenting us LA. The guys look, let's just say, I'm all four women not being sexually assaulted, but I think the pendulum swung a little too far.

That's my favorite thing to be horrified at at the moment is like, hey, enough's enough. We rounded up a couple bad guys, but now someone's not allowed to force a woman to kiss them in a professional situation. Like, yeah, you're right, dude, they're not. Someone's not allowed to compliment somebody. Well, not that way. If nobody was forcibly kissing anyone, nobody would ever be born because nobody would ever go out on dates.

It's like there are all these guys who are like, now, who am I going to give my hugs to? When I'm at the office, I got all these hugs, like I've really struggled. I've got so much love to give. Don't you understand it? It hurts me and stuff. Actually, that is a lot of nerds who end up having fixations on friends that they have crushes on and they're like, don't you understand how much I love you and it's not fair of you to not love me back and like dude just come on.

Like stop talking to Deadpool dude. He's a character, he'll never love you. You're not a Chumichong guy. You should have left these feelings of resentment behind in middle school if you had them at all. It's like the grow up. Anyway, it's very hard for a lot of guys to grow up because society rewards them for not doing so. But anyway, Katie finishes the amazing...

It's only like 90% of entertainment is directed to them. And it's almost the same number of jobs and just all culture, even entertainment, all culture of all time. Yeah, that's true. Katie finishes the amazing African Savannah mural. She's painting in the daughter's room. She's now started dressing the two girls alike.

And the girls claim that she said they were sisters. This, and by this point, I was like, yeah, this is the opposite of unforgettable. And I really wish there was some kind of flop house cinema. I wish there was some kind of flop house cinematic universe so that Catherine Haigel could go up against Katie, since they also both walk on to knives at different points in the movie.

But let's get to that later. Gina Gershawm shows up to find that Katie is dying her daughter's hair blond. Turns out they're both naturally have dark hair, which we know is not true because we saw they need to wear wigs. Maybe they're not naturally dark under the wig. A double blind. And, and Gertrachan says, I'm not taking maternity leave for this new baby.

I'm just gonna hire a new nanny, and Katie is offended by this. Detail in this dinner scene where they discuss this, there's a huge platter of fried chicken on the table, which nobody takes anything from. It was very distracting to me. The whole time I just want to be like, if you guys aren't going to eat that,

can I have that flat or fried chicken? Yeah, I think Gina Gershon angrily takes the plates into the kitchen and they're like piled high with fried chicken and corn. I'm eating fried chicken. Untouched. And Gina Gershon says, no, I want to go back to work and Katie's like, you're going to have a stranger

watch your child. Nicholas Cage, of course, takes Katie's side. Yeah, this is the weirdest part. Nicholas Cage taking Katie's like, you're gonna have a stranger watch your child, Nicholas Cage, of course, takes Katie's side of that. Yeah, this is the weirdest part, Nicholas Cage taking Katie's side. Like later on, when Katie is gaslighting everyone and making it look like Gina Gershawn has a drug problem, I kind of understand where Nicholas Cage is coming from because he's like, you're spiraling out of control.

It's not like he's totally on sympathetic, he's just like, look, you had a problem before I'm worried that you had that problem. But here's your reason. Yeah, yeah, he should not like he's like totally on sympathetic. He's just like Like look you had a problem before I'm worried that you have that problem. Yeah, but you're Yeah, yeah, he should be like yeah, she's taking she's not taking maternity leave So we're gonna have a I mean the correct response room would be like be like back off of my wife exactly like She needs more than our home life Anyway, I'm I get more than my home life and she should have the same thing because we're partners

Asshole, but thank you for carrying our child to turn Maybe that's why it's not doing like it's nay on that don't want to I know that if she happens to see a different A deformed person the baby will be deformed because I'm a medieval doctor So you have set her the baby might come out as I don't know a demon Gene a garish on soap set she almost takes one of the sedative pills But doesn't and throws them out. But Katie sees her throwing the pills out and assumes the worth. Bath time, time for Katie to have a bath time flashback.

She's dark hair again, painting yet another of the same mural. She hears a baby crying. We see that the mother of that baby is just lying in the bathtub for the other gratuitous nudity in the film. Yeah. There's just a naked woman in the bathtub. And this woman is named Tammy. I mean, how else is she gonna take a fucking bath, dude? Yeah, we should go right to the point.

Come on. I mean, they could have framed it differently as the thing. Yeah, make it a bubble bath, right? Yeah, yeah, cover him up. Everybody loves that shit. But Katie runs in, she says, how can you just have a bath while your child is crying? Which, you know what I kind

of said that was the both sides on this because you do think she should get out and come for that child baby but on the other hand I've dealt with crying babies sometimes it's like I should not be murdered for that. Yeah bad going on yeah yeah it's also weird to call somebody out on that when you want like storm into the bathroom with that. It's also weird that actually you know what it's not something at all because the woman in the bathroom be like, you're the nanny. I'm paying you to take care of this. I need a moment to take a bath. Can you go take care of my child like I'm paying you to do?

And Katie does not say like, I'll go see the baby. Instead she takes the woman's head, banged us against the tub and then drowns her. Because we now know her MO, which is hitting people in the head with something and then drowning them. It's how she kills all of her victims. That's why she carries a pale water around with her everywhere. She goes just in case she kills a person. Poseidon's daughter, they call her.

She's the Jack Lelaine Neptune killer. So she puts on a locket with the little baby's name, which is Maddie. And now we learn, oh, when she was running away in the beginning, she wasn't the wife running away from abusive husband. No, no, no. She killed that mother and then killed the father. Yeah. Oh, okay. Anyway. I mean, that, like, you realize that before that happened, right? Yes. But this just makes it clear. Like, you know that she wasn't really i mean the only time i thought that she was running away from abuse of husband was

literally watching the opening scene yet everything after that made a clear oh no she's a craze yeah there was a brief moment where i was worried they were going to be like look she's crazy that's why she killed her husband would a bitch but likely they didn't do that no she's merely crazy because once women have children, they become insanely attached. It's the point of psychotic madness. Oh, you're saying it wasn't misogynist again. One way, it was misogynist again another way. Exactly, exactly in that way. And frankly, even though

genitalism is the good guy in the movie, I still think the movie is judging her for one not being able to carry a child's term on her own and two, for having a professional career. It's like, look, ladies. Yeah, her weakness is brought this demon to their house. Exactly. If you could be a mom, you wouldn't have a monster in your house or a mom's door, if you're a whiff,

which is a monster mom. I won't. Oh, you won't be then retracted. All right, just drag that to the trash can in my brain and delete. Yeah. Okay. And unplug the computer and throw it out the window.

Katie thinks that Gina Gershaw's taking drugs and Gina Gershaw starts snooping around the guest house and finds a bunch of baby books with crazy person notes in them. Katie is already really attached to this fetus that's in her and she finds a picture of them. I mean, physically she's attached to it, right? I guess find a Biblical core. There's like a bunch of cables and stuff, right? We covered that for your books. Yeah, just like being a matrix pod. Yeah, the umbilical cord. Okay, there's like a bunch of cables and stuff, right? We covered that for your bulls. Yeah, just like being a matrix pod.

Yeah, the, I'm billical cord's the original cable. Yeah, you know that the video for closer where the guy is kind of floating around in space with that guy. The guy. A front resident. Yeah. That's basically what it's like inside a woman's body,

including having a little piano that you can play. Oh, cool. Yeah. Anyway, Gina Gershon goes to sleuth on the computer until she literally falls asleep with the computer in her lap. Nicholas Cage wakes her up, looks at what she was looking at, a real invasion of her privacy, and Katie, when she gets home notices her books are a skew. Someone's been a snoopin. Oh, and Gina Gershon's research is that she finds... And she sees blood on the windowsill, right?

Yes, because, well, not this time, right? Because Gene Gershon just walked in the open door. Or maybe, no, maybe... The amount of attention we're paying to the specific plot points in this movie is terrifying. Anyway, the point is, Gene Gershon does a bunch of research on evil surrogates, catches Katie calling herself Mama to their daughter, and confront each other and And Katie accuses her of feeling guilty about being a bad mom

Oblivious Nicholas Cage just wanders in to reveal that Hey, we've got a present for you She painted another mural for our new son and it has the name Gabriel on it because Katie and I named the baby Which is crazy. Yeah. Like that's crazy. But now Gina Gershaw looks like a crazy addict to her husband and mother-in-law. And I don't, this is not, was this one they have the surprise baby shower?

No, that was, wasn't that later after, after she gets doped? Yes, yes, that's right. But everyone thinks she's crazy and she just keeps saying to Katie, she thinks Katie killed Linda. She was going, answer this one question, answer this one question. She can't answer this one question. And Katie pretends to have pregnancy pains to get out of the situation. Nicholas Cage turns to his wife and says, you put our baby's life at risk by accusing her of being a murderer. Being a cool dude. Yeah.

Nicholas Cage says, I want you to give me a urine sample so that you can prove to me that you're not on drugs. And you have to apologize to Katie. Anyway, long story short, more snooping. It's so fucking weird that her husband is treating her like she's a McDonald's employee. Yeah, and he's just say, get back to the fryer. Your brakes over.

Make this weirdest paper hat. I mean, part of the issue is that she's taking, she's not taking enough breaks. Yeah, she's working too hard. You know what? Some people are hardly working. Instead of working hard, she's one of those people. One of these days, she's got to get organized eyes. But you know what? Hang in there, Gina Gershaw. Because you don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps. But you don't have to be crazy to accuse your nanny of being a murderer, but it helps. Anyway, blah, blah, blah, things, and this is when Gina Dershon breaks into the guesthouse because Katie is locked the door and she cuts her hand on the window.

Blah, blah, blah, blah doesn't matter. She does some very slow snooping and finds out that the head of the surrogate company also died under mysterious circumstances. Boat-axe. finds out that the head of the surrogate company also died under mysterious circumstances. Boom! It was funny. She calls up the surrogate company to ask to speak to them and the secretary goes, oh no, she died. It was ruled a suicide. You sound like you don't believe her. No, she loved life. And it's so alive.

And it's so alive. And it's so alive. And it's so alive. And the movie is such, it's so spoon-feeding clues at this point that I think it's so funny and so unprofessional the secretary to say that I don't know that she also didn't give out any information about Past donors now that's true. Yes, you can't do that nor did she give out information about who painted the lovely Moral yeah, that's in the video that the surrogate ahead is it the website has yet to be updated they haven't yet taken down the video with the now dead woman in it and behind it's a way to keep her Kind of keep her spirit alive

Behinders a mural that was clearly painted by Katie because it's the same damn mural the same African Savannah with the same tree But what I like about it is trying to get her right is let's say that yeah tree, but what I like about it is trying to get it right is let's say that yeah, let's say, uh, Gene Gershaw is just calling up that you throw out the first pancake or two, Elliot. I mean, you know, was it Monet who did the haystacks? He did so many haystacks. Yeah, Monet was talking about pancakes for his couple. I mean, there's there. Yes, okay, artists often become fixated on one object worth or subject for their art. Yeah, Woody Allen first. Yeah, Woody Allen is fixated on how he is amazingly able to get away with having sex with younger women, but and death.

But at least you find some variations within that theme. I mean, come on, come on guys, come on, at least paint a different tree than anyway. So the pieces are all falling into place. Katie has a, I think, and I think the surrogate woman was the woman that was there when Katie learned that she can no longer produce eggs if I'm remembering correctly. They decide, I'm gonna do a DNA, or a gene aggression, so I'm gonna do a DNA test on Katie

to see if she and my daughter have the same DNA. But at the same DNA. But at the same time, Katie, while she is snooping to try to get Katie's DNA, Katie grounds up sedative pills and puts them in GeneGerishm's carrot juice. They are always drinking carrot juice in this movie. Lots of carrot juice gives her a thermosful of carrot juice to take to the office. Well, that explains her magical eyesight, which is a huge plot point. Yeah.

True good point. Have you guys now seen? And why is she's being followed by rabbits all over the place? They could smell it on her. Yeah. Have you guys ever drank carrot juice? I've had carrot juice in other juices. It's not the question I asked you to. No, I've never had a straight...

I didn't say you ever drank V8. I said you ever drank carrot juice. I've never had straight carrot juice. I don't think so. No, me either. Yet everybody in this movie, carrot juice is the most natural thing in the world to drink. Why would we juice anything else when we can juice a carrot? Uh-huh. Did you see it? Can you just squeeze the carrot and feel that sweet juice?

Yeah, you cut the top off and squeeze in your mouth. Thanks for a lot of suck at all that juice. But juicey carrot. Yeah, watching this movie I suffered from a little bit of culture shock because I'm like, everything about it reminds me of the place that I live except one little thing is off. Instead of drinking water, they're always drinking juice out of carrots. Yeah, this is an ultimate reality. Yeah, where they walk up to a vending machine and all this, who's carrot juice.

You're like, this isn't Atlanta, not the Atlanta, I remember. They're like, you know what? We're hurting the environment with all this bottled carrot juice that we're selling. Yeah. And these bottles are just piling up. When it comes in, it's a natural vessel, the skin of a carrot.

They don't carry around wine skins, the carrot skins. Yeah. And very thin sheets of paper are also called carrot skins. Yeah, I think I was a little cap. It's called carrot skin. I think they were watching the low girls play Mario Carton in this world instead of slipping out of banana peel.

Your cart spins out of control if you run over a carrot peel. What I loved is that you made a Mario Kart thing as if that was where banana peels being slipped on came front. I'd like you to say that they're watching the play Mario and instead of a mushroom making him bigger, a carrot makes him bigger. And it's the carrot kingdom and tot as a carrot on his head, which looks just like a clan. No, that'd be crazy.

That'd be crazy, all right? This is some kind of strange world where pizzas are not made with tomato sauce, with carrot sauce. Oh, great. Did he give us another carrot thing? Carrots are used to stab people. I guess his bit just died.

OK. Way to kill it, Dan. I almost think you did that on purpose. Well, I think that was going on a little long. Dan is to the carrot bit as President Trump is to Obamacare. You're deliberately sabotaging the bit, Dan. By refusing to provide the funds, when this case jokes that it needs to survive,

I apologize. But, Dan, our carrot joke exchanges need federal intervention. If they're going to support it, you're taking away carrot joke cake. For millions of Americans. I promise to pull us out of the trans carrot partnership. So, no, that's going to leave China as the only major carrot trading partner in Asia in the Pacific.

They've been, they've been buying our caries for too long. Uh, I think I understand what you're saying. Yeah. Gina Dershan drops off the DNA test and then passes out in her car on the least busy street in the history of streets. Yeah, I feel like she like pulled into a parking lot and fell asleep. And we've all been there, you know, it's tough, it's a tough life. We wanted to sleep off of juice.

She suspects the carrot juice and she's right. That's when right, she walks home to a huge surprise baby shower full of people we've never seen before, which which I mean is fair. I'm movie about. I mean it's good that you slept exactly long enough to make it to the baby shower. And it's also at this point it's like Nicholas Cage. I think part of the problem here is you're not letting your wife be a part of this baby's life. She wasn't there to name it. She wasn't there to organize the baby shower. Who would throw a surprise baby shower. Listeners, if you've ever attended or thrown or been the subject of a surprise baby shower,

let me know because the last thing you wanna do for a woman who's that far longer pregnancy, give her a big surprise that's gonna throw her into some kind of shock of some kind. The same way that it's like, hey, guy with a heart attack, we're gonna throw you a surprise birthday party, we're just gonna scream at you all of a sudden. Do you think that Nicholas Cage is like, well, if I kind of started off at like a really

irritating level, she'll let me get away with lesser infractions later on. Like, what is he building up to? Maybe once a buy a second motorcycle. Okay, interesting. Well, what I do like is when she shows up and she starts freaking out and accusing Katie of drugging her, Nicholas Cage kicks everybody in the party out. Interesting. Well, what I do like is when she shows up and she starts freaking out and accusing Katie of Drugging her Nicholas gauge kicks everybody in the party out. All right. Get out of here. Let's go parties Yeah, and they didn't do anything. It's up there fault. No, and all the again What's gonna not what's gonna go uneaten? I have to assume another huge platter of fried chicken laying out for their guests. I think I'm gonna say fried carrots

That'd be crazy, Dan. Why would he say that? Why would I possibly say that? That's true. What in my past behavior has led you to believe I would ever make a comment like that about carrots of all things. A vegetable which I don't have to make the case here is not something you would regularly juice all the time. She, anyway, he throws everyone out. He says, you're on drugs. Let's get out of here. And that just remind me early on when they were, when they were first like hanging out with Katie

and they were talking about her family. And she's like, I never knew my father, my mother was addicted to drugs. And that was like the way she says it felt like somebody who doesn't actually understand what drugs are. Like I don't know, like it felt like something where she would have been slightly more specific, but I don't know, maybe I'm just making stuff. Maybe I'm on drugs.

No, you're just making drugs. All of the drugs, I guess. Sure. You're addicted to all of them. Heroin, ecstasy, penicillin, all the drugs. Those are herbal supplements all of them heroin ecstasy penicillin all the drugs those are all supplements You know you get a direction What those be like and I don't know made out of carrots It is one of the more phallic of the vegetables. It's not true. There's a shit ton of phallic vegetables

You got a parsnip Parsnip is the first one you went to not cucumber cucumber. I went to zucchini to the first most eggplant somewhere squash summer squat. What about winter squash? Winter squash. They're too fat. Okay, like a butter nut squash. That's enough like it is more of a joke. Your team doesn't have a class of butter nut squash hourglass shape. Interesting learning about dance penis that it's not shaped like a butter nut squad rock a Alini. Yeah, that's right.

Yeah, big head of collar. Big head on it, I guess. Anyway, that's gross. Then Nicholas Gage is like, I'm not in the next scene. I'm out of here. I'm awesome. And Katie reveals everything to Gina Gershaw. She felt betrayed that all these women who sacrificed nothing to get their babies where she sacrificed everything then hired some other stranger

to watch them. And Gina Gershaw was like, get away from me, I have a knife in my hand and classic move. Katie walks into the knife and stabs herself just like you're unforgettable and then starts banging her head against the counter. And there's a struggle and Gina Gershaw gets stabbed and Nicholas Cage is like, oh no, and they're both in the counter. Yeah. And there's a struggle. And Gina Gershon gets stabbed. And Nicholas Cage is like, oh no. And they're both in the hospital. And Nicholas Cage gets the DNA results. And she says, he says Katie. And they say there's bad news about Gina Gershon.

Uh, I'm assuming that there was a scene that was cut for time where the doctors like, I think something's up with Katie. And Nicholas Cage is like, that's impossible. My wife stabbed her and she had her head a bunch of times and the doctor's like, have you ever seen that scene in Fight Club where Edward Norton does that to get out of getting fired? I thought you didn't say, have you ever seen

an unforgettable wait, what? What movie? Nicholas is, I don't remember if I saw that or not. And gets the news that Nicholas Cage tells Katie that the universe has died of her stab wounds. I mean, I think he just walks up and shakes his head. Oh, right. That's all he does.

And you're like, I don't know what that means in the context of what happens later here. It's very commonly revealed that Katie has had. It's like Nicholas Cage's like, I can't lie. But he's made a bad on like I can't lie. Like he's made about himself that will never lie. So he has to just do this misdirection. And they say, Katie, you have to have a C-section right now. And she says, your wife's with your wife away.

Now I love you. And she forces a kiss on him, President Trump style. And or I don't know, Al Franken style, whatever, whatever way they do it. And he's like, oh, so disgusted. Cut to after delivery, he takes, he takes Katie to see baby Gabriel in the, in the baby holding pan. And I've been, I've been,

well the baby's fighting each other. Don't remember what the name was going to be. Gabriel has already beaten up the biggest baby to establish dominance as is the advice you get. And he says, she's like, oh, he's beautiful. And take a look. I want you to see it. It's your last. And he walks into the nursery and holds the baby. But Kage is locked out. And Gina Gershon walks in. She wasn't dead. Uh oh, looks like the mouse is trapped. The cat. I love that. Nicholas Kage's eyeballs explode. You like you'll never see anything again

I don't like Nicholas cages for some reasons like I had to pump you Like there's no real point for them some Avengers, dude. I guess well of course I just give her give you a little taste of your own medicine because I'm a doctor of surprises I'm a doctor of revenge. I've got an MD and turning about being fair play and I got a PhD and what goes around comes around. Okay, we get it, Nick. You understand? No, no, no. I've got a master's in best serve cold. And then I've got a second master in paybacks of bits. I want a double master. I'm probably taking these, probably still paying off

them student loans. I am. And I minor in karma. No, I'm sorry. And I minor in poverty. And I did take a Turkish cooking class, which I didn't get like it's not a free free food. It's like a certificate they print out for you.

There's a picture of tabooly or something on it. What are they eating turkey? I don't remember. I took the class, but I honestly, I was studying for my, my master's degree and paybacks of bitch. So I didn't wasn't really focusing on the Turkish cooking. Anyway, so it makes you more well around the point is you got burnt and you'll never see the baby again. And Katie's like, no, no. And the police show up. And the next we see of Katie, she's in an insane asylum. I have to assume Arkham. Yeah. Yeah.

I'll escape and get the babies and all of the babies. She's now baby girl, the baby themed Batman villain. She's gonna team up with calendar man and killer crock. What's gonna happen to her daughter? Uh, oh, she gets adopted by Nicholas Cage and Gina Hershaw. I guess that's okay. And then next we cut to Nicholas Cage jogging Gershaw. I guess that's okay. And then actually cut to Nicholas Cage jogging home as we saw him doing the beginning.

And for a moment, I was like, wait a minute. Did he just dream this whole movie while he was jogging? Yeah. Like if he just walks in and he goes, honey, I had the craziest dream. It was inconceivable. Cut to smash cut. Nicholas Cage will return an interview to another jogging dream, but that doesn't happen.

Instead, he walks in. Gina Gershon is taking a nap with the two daughters and their son Gabriel. They now have three kids. One of them, they didn't even have to do anything for. Well, I mean, they have to survive a killer. And she gives Gina Gershon a locket with the pictures of all three of the kids that she goes, Oh, it's beautiful. Thank you. And the movie leaves me wondering, was that really a good enough

sorry? I didn't believe you when we had to kill her, nanny, present like as far as make it up. Yeah, he's still got to be paying for that shit. Yeah. Yeah. Like, remember it wasn't... Stop by zales, honey. Whenever a basketball player keeps on his life just to give eyes to like a fancy expensive ring. Like, does this locket make up for that? I don't know. It's not that pretty lock. It is not. And the pictures he chose of the kids, not the best, to be honest. Of the baby, I get it.

It's hard to take a really good picture of a newborn baby. They're weird looking. Yeah. But there's only one master and getty. But you have to travel to the other. To a real big high-doubt watermelon. You've got to go to the top of a Himalayan mountain to find her in her secluded studio where she does strange and bizarre things with babies.

Together with the footage of them inside of the watermelon's or butternut squash, or other non-peness-shaped plants. And getties, that's the name I haven't heard in a long time. She is at a forge. And hammering a costume for a baby that makes her look like a baby with a strawberry and like, and get it. And she turns and has a long beard. How'd you mind?

I told you I was done. I was done with all that. We need someone to take a picture of a baby dressed up as a little forleaf flover to save the president's life. You're the only one who can do it. Yeah. So now would you final judgments? Inconceivable.

Whether this was a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie kind of like, Stuart, what do you think? Ah, I think this movie verges on good bad at times. It's probably closer to a bad bad, but I think there's some moments on good bad at times. It's probably closer to a bad, bad, but I think there's some moments from good bad.

So if you're like, if you're just thirsty for a good bad and you wanna pop something in, this won't be the best thing. Hopefully you'll have something else to fill out that double feature. Yeah, but it's pretty goofy. If you pop it in with some pals to watch it and laugh at the goofs, you won't have the greatest time of all time, but you want a bad time. Yeah, it's a it's a lower level good bad

Yeah, no, I'll make it three marginal good bad and I think I'm just a sucker for these like weird hand that rocks the cradle Esk Domestic thrillers the movie about or some wells is play being shut down That's the cradle rock. Oh, right Yeah, hand the rocks the cradle. That's the movie about or some well-susplay being shut down. That's the cradle of rock. Oh, right. Yeah, I hand the rocks the cradle That's the one about that's like another like a hand. No, I know it's one about a killer Nana. Yeah, right. Yeah, there it's they are it's considering it's a situation that I don't know If it's ever happened. It seems inconceivable But also, unforgettable. And maybe limitless.

And also a 10,000 BC. And Jonah Hex. Yeah. Hi, everybody. I'm Justin McAroy. And I'm Dr. Sidney McAroy. Every week, we release a medical history podcast called Saw Bones. We go over the history of the dumbest, grossest, weirdest stuff humans have been doing to

each other since the dawn of mankind. But it's a funny show. But it's also so disgusting and stomach-turning you won't believe it. But it's also like, funny, it's funny. It is the wildest, grossest, nastiest stuff you can imagine. It's a real hoot. It's called solbones, and we release it every week on iTunes, wherever podgaster sold, and right here on MaximumFun.org.

Hey, Max Fun listeners, it's Jesse, the founder of MaximumFun.org. I have some pretty incredible holiday news for you. So you remember last year's Max Fun Drive? We offered pins for all of our shows to folks who donated, and we agreed to donate all of the net revenue from the pins to the Los Angeles Regional Food Bank. Well, I, just yesterday, had the chance to hand a giant check to a representative from the Food Bank. And you're not going to believe how much money you gave to give needy families food.

Over $100,000, $100,000, $365, to be specific. That means nearly half a million meals for families who need food this year. I'm really proud of every single maximum fund owner who made this possible. It's a remarkable achievement, a beautiful thing. It completely obliterated my idea and expectation of what we might be able to do this year. So, as you head into 2018, please be proud of what this amazing community did for hungry families in the Los Angeles area where Max Fun is based. If you'd like to keep a love rolling, go to lafoodbank.org slash maximum fun.

That's lafoodbank.org slash maximum fun and you can make a tax deductible donation there. Every dollar that you give means four meals for needy families. Thanks to all of you who support everything that we do and thanks for your incredible contribution to folks who need it here in our hometown. We've got a couple of sponsors. Oh, the blood house. Thanks sponsors for

paying us money and we'll talk about your products and their great. Including a new sponsor and that's RxBAR. Support from the Flapphouse comes in part. From RxBAR, a whole food protein bar made with 100% whole ingredients. No halves. Look, you know, you get these diet bars or these like protein bars that I got a bunch of crap in them

and you don't know what it is and they've got like a huge number of calories RX bar what it's got is three egg whites two dates six almonds and a little bit of flavoring and that's it and I we got some samples. I quite liked them. I'm trying to lose a little bit of weight I had them all get out of here. You look great. Thanks buddy. Thanks for that. That's sincere expression. But I had these for breakfast one week. They were great. They come in 11 dishes delicious. 11 different. We're dishes.

Put them on the dish. 11. I mean, it's perfect. Take the time. Put it on a dish. We're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d- we're d it. But we have a lot of- If it's comedy central, though, we run it over and over again. True. We have a lot of crap to eat. And one of our producers, Mike Falbo, who's a great guy, he said, you know what, reading too much unhealthy stuff. And he went out and got a bunch of boxes of our expires. And everybody started feeling better

because they weren't so weighed down and feeling gross eating like Fritos all the time. Yeah. I mean Fritos for breakfast is crazy. I know they weren't for breakfast. It's like for snacks around, you know. But would it be crazy? Yeah. I'm just imagining eating like cereal now. Yeah, but instead of milk, it's queso. Okay. Freedom. Cheerio. They had the same last name. Can't be that different. Yeah.

That last name is O. That last name. O. I'm Mr. O and this is my wife, Mrs. O. I'm Cheerio and this is free for the O brothers. This is the end of course our strange brother, Doreet. Oh, nice to meet you. I'm cheat.

No relation. RX bars are great for lots of occasions. Like breakfast on the meet you. I'm cheap, no relation. Our expires are great for lots of occasions. Breakfast on the go, like I had it, or a pre-earpost workout snack. Or just a snack at work. Yeah. For 25% off your first order, visit rxbar.com slash flopphouse and enter promo code flopphouse at checkout. And we're also sponsored by an old favorite Mac Weldon.

Oh wow. One of my favorites. I'm wearing Mac Weldon's right now, I think. I think I am too, actually. Let me, Newy Kelly, it's pants down. Let me see. Yep, they're there. Yep.

My testicles are pretty little so beautifully in this Mac Weldon underwear. So right. Mac Weldon. I have both the freedom of movement and the airiness, but also I feel secure. Like I'm not going to fall out of them. Is that direct copy you're reading?

No, this is the way I make it on Mac Weldon underwear. They're dedicated to making underwear, but also socks, shirts, undershirts, hoodies, and sweatpants that look and feel great. They believe in smart design, premium fabrics, and simple shopping. And Macwild wants you to be comfortable. So if you don't like your first pair,

you can keep it, and they will still refund you. No questions asked. Here's how I would explain how I feel when I'm running Macwild into where. I'm like a trapeze artist who is swing and free in the air, but I know that nets below me. So you know what? I'm not afraid.

I'm just enjoying the exhilarating feeling, a freedom of movement, you know? I'm like, brand-fusy is bird in space. I'm just pure energy movement. And I don't have to worry about anything that I worry about. It's right, you learn the fans. Normally, yeah, normally you're sweating bullets. No, normally I'm sweating bullets like the megadeth song about the same name, which

is about too tight underwear. I'm worried about my sperm count because like, I don't want these. There's a reason these things are in a sack that hangs below me because it shouldn't be too close to my body heat. Oh, okay. Why does the score exist? And I thought it was to give people a natural weak point. That's true. Does that every good creature designer have that weak point? It's not invincible.

Yeah, yeah, I read that in Rick Baker's autobiography. And also just throughout the day that regular underpants just gets constricting, you know? But Mac Weldon's all day, it feels good. We got a special deal for listeners. Go to MacWeldon.com and get 20% off using promo code flop. Do you think they didn't want me to use the word scrotum in the end?

I mean, it's what we're talking about. I mean, they can't run away from what their product does. I mean, it's there to cradle your scrotum. That's the whole point, isn't it? Although maybe they created a product to cover up scrotums because they don't want people to talk about it. Yeah, Mr. Weldon is like, I hate scrotums. I have to cover up.

Hidious, I mean, this Hidious, but... Yeah. What would you next, Dan, as well? We got a jumbo, John. I thought I had time to look at my phone because, uh, this is where it was going to take over. Because you didn't want to be engaged in the rest in the, okay? I'm looking up something for later in the show.

Yep, Dan's over on PornHub. So we got a ju-ju-ju jumbo tron. Oh, this is awesome. Okay, cool. Enjoy cinematic failure. Then check out Nathan Ravens' happy place. Oh, wonderful. It's author, former AV club, and the dissolve staffer, and flop house superfan Nathan Ravens online home and the new home of his formerly popular column, My World of Flops,

and Nathan Ravens Happycast, Nathan's new podcast with Clint Worthington. Plus lots of stuff. It's quite good. So please visit Nathanraben.com and subscribe to Nathan Ravens Happy Cast on iTunes. It would not be an exaggeration to call Nathan Raven a friend of the show. He's been very good to us over the years. Yeah, wonderful. Written a lot of articles about the flop house. And I've been reading his articles, not about the flop house for an amazing decade.

Yeah, and what was it about two years ago that the dissolve split up. And it takes a lot of work for me to track down where all those writers are still writing. And so it's nice of Nathan to put this out there. So you can find one of those writers. Yeah, so yeah, definitely check that out. This is more than just a jumbo drop. Yeah.

But other jumbo trunks, check out those too, but this one especially. Before we get into the next segment, I wanted to remind listeners that there's a new flop house comic book out. Oh, yeah.. Oh yeah. What's going on there? What's the story there?

It'll tell us about it. So it goes to your comic. So it's the third in a series of three short stories that we wrote on the theme of love. On the theme of love and romance. And being that it's us, L.A. It's was about superheroes. Dan is about his own natural loneliness. And mine is about

a couple of adventurers in a fantasy world who kind of gets set up on a little blind date. A lot of quest if you will. Yeah, to go exploring a dungeon. And the art is all provided by the incredibly talented Kelsey Ricks. And it covered by Tom Fowler and all the like all the stories in this series, all of the money is going to the Unidos disaster relief for Puerto Rico. That the people that definitely still need a ton of help, even though you're not seeing about it on TV all the time, and still... They just... I mean, they still need a lot of money.

It's... Puerto Rico is still in such bad shape, and they so need our help, and for anyone who's listening to this, who's American, those are fellow Americans who need us and are not getting the help that they deserve, and this is a small way that you can help and read a great story from Stuart. Thanks. Check it out at flophouse.com. Flophouse. Podcast.com.

That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about.

That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about. That's what you're talking about.D. and you'll find the comment. But now we turn to everybody's second favorite part of the show, letters from listener. The first part. Everyone's first favorite part of the show is the song that goes into letters. People love it, it's their favorite part. Consistently topping the polls.

Consistently errant roles all the way to the song when they get a new episode. They see the movie discussion and hit, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, is the song starting? No, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip it along to the song,

to listen any other way would feel so wrong. Cause the song is the favorite part of the episode. It's that flop house letters song. Fop house letters. Going to read them right now in a minute. The first will have a song like the one from Mr. Belvedere. Just like this. You know, sometimes letters come to the flop house.

But first you gotta sing a song about them. And then there's the letters for the flop house. Whatever happened to the regular flop has song. Now it sounds like the flop song. And yeah, we just did this on the 50 shades darker. I just got released. I've slapped myself. It's the same order.

I certainly didn't do Mr. Belvedere then did I? I think we did. Yeah, really? Yeah. Well, we have relatively, we have a relatively limited pool of references here. Yeah. Okay, let me do a flopp house letters parody of the odd couple song. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do and I'm like, no. I think the last of those was maybe what the cheers theme. Yeah. Oh yeah. Pretty wistful. Wistful for another time and like life's hard. Go with your drinking

buddies, your bar fly. The only time you're happy is when you're sucking down some blues. That's the one we're experiencing. Life is hard. So go with some drinking, but is your bar fly? You wanna go where you can drink yourself into a stupor. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. And now they're all by life. You're the best you made of your life. Now they're all like, they might be giant songs, right, guys. Yeah, everything's about tall salad and scrambled eggs.

Oh, man, that song's great. Even that's like a 20 year old song. Well, not really do theme songs. It's like, it'll be like, that's the whole thing. Yeah. Yeah. Unless it's 30 rock noms like, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam.

No, there's a lot of those, or it's like the unbreakable, kidney Schmidt one. Oh, well, that's unbreakable. Yeah. That's because the music's done with the same person. Oh, okay. Or it's like the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt one. Oh, well, that's Unbreakable. Yeah. That's because the music's done with the same person. Oh, okay. Or it's like a comparable Jeff Richmond, Mr. Tina Fey. Mm-hmm. Or like crazy as girlfriend as a new song each season. That's great.

Oh, I haven't watched the second season yet. You totally should. Aren't you like friends with her husband or something? We knew each other in college, and then we interned at the Daily Show together. So you're not friends is what you're saying now that I back in LA I should get in touch with him. Anyone knows Dan Gregor.

Let him know. I need to. You should. So let's do letters. Uh, I'm the guy. This is from Randall last name with held Randell Thor. The dragon reborn. Randall Randall's Island. I'm the guy who wrote. Yeah, Dan Randall Thor the dragon reborn Randall's island. I'm the guy who wrote

I don't know Randall's island I wish the listeners could see my eyes roll 480 degrees out of my head I'm the guy who wrote asking what movie memorabilia would inspire them to break the bank I'm happy that Elliott was able to obtain a gurry the dinosaur and I hope he is able to Trogue-Gazinder hate. Ask him what that means. I don't know. You know, sir?

No. All right. I mean, it's probably, it sounds yetishese, then maybe that's why he's asking which case. Randall, thank you for making it possible for me to get that Girty, but I don't appreciate the stereotype about my native language. I'm an American, and I speak English. I have another question. It sounds kind of dutch, too. I mean, it also could be trollish. I don an American and I speak English. I have another question. It sounds kind of dutch too.

I mean, it also could be trollish. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. I have another question and I've been thinking about this since listening to the October scaring movie episodes. It's a long time ago. As I'm getting older, I'm finding fewer horror movies that scare me. Oh, excluding documentaries, what is a movie that legitimately scares you? Are they horror movies or more realistic slash-drum dramatic movies? Is the shining or alien still able to scare you upon repeat viewings?

I did watch a Korean movie called The Whaling and I found that very scary. Thanks and I see that. I sincerely hope you all have a great new year. Randall last name withheld. Uh, yeah, movies still scare me all the time. It follows. It scared me like crazy. Really? Yeah. I liked it follows, but I found it, I just, I'm more

took pleasure in this. You identified more with the following creature than the kids, right? Well, I'm thinking of a chance. Stop running. I guess that scene where they were like, it was trying to get into the, like, the barn or whatever it was, I found that very, that's one of my lead, that's one of the lead. There's, I find the, I have a lot of bad dreams that involve being chased by a thing

that keeps going through, it cannot, I cannot shake. So maybe that was it. That's a primordial fear that it tapped into. That's weird. Most of my dreams lately are caused by the two cats that are wrestling around on top of me on the bed and they are very strange dreams. I think the last movie that really scared me and this is a little

while back now it was the that is sent that really fucked me up. Oh, you mean the movie where it is terrifying because they're trapped underground. Yeah. Four monsters show. Exactly. It actually gets less scary. Yeah, it's easy to see the monsters. You're like, please show me how to get out of here. I'm gonna say that. I'm finally gonna ask for direction. Yeah, you're like, oh great. It's capable of sustaining life down here. That's nice. I do a horror movie double feature every October and I usually pick like a fun horror movie. And then one year I picked the descent and everyone was horrible. It's not fun enough. Yeah, I mean, I find, you know, I'm, I think I'm a pretty easy audience with horror movies.

I, I kind of get scared easily. I like to make it speak as what? There's that, yeah. I, I think it's because I have a pretty active imagination. I think it's because I have a pretty active imagination. But I think the scariest movie I saw this year was I feel more like a difficult movie. And that was Hounds of Love, which is probably going to... I'm still trying to figure out my favorite movies of the year, but I feel like that was easily one of the most memorable Experiences I had this year for the top 10 list you're writing for Buzzfeed. Yeah

Hey guys, I just got hired by Buzzfeed to write one top 10 list No, but I don't know like I can't help but I mean I like to make this I like to make lists Yeah, yeah, you're a regular fidelity. Mm-hmm. That's mean I find that yeah, it's I find movies are creepy to me more than life. I mean, I'm clearly check black and high fidelity Yeah, yeah, of course you're the nerdy guy at the end is John Q.sac but that but I get to I end up with What was the Gilbert at the end probably yeah, that's fine. I don't remember that movie that well. Yeah, that's what happens But the I'm okay with that the I think there's there movies like the witch or

Like creep Where I can wait which one there's a couple creeps the first one that the are you talking about with the duplast one? Yeah, the class one. Yeah, not the not the TLC song. No, there's one where there's a creature in the subways. No, not that one. The duplac one. Yeah, that TLC song is fucking awesome. But yeah, that's scary though. It's like I'm not scared while watching the movie,

but it's scary enough that afterwards my imagination starts taking over. And I'm like, I'll be lying in bed and just thinking like, you do a class going to get me. Like, duplac is just going to walk through that door right now, wearing that wolf mask. And I don't know what to do. Yeah. Yeah, that was pretty creepy, Louis.

Lived up to the title. The titular creep was a creep. Well, thanks for the letter. The letter. And thanks for inspiring my new favorite object for them. The next letter is from Eli last name with held. Eli Lilly. Despite you guys being my favorite podcast, thanks.

I'm not in a movies at all. All right. My friend, however, is an aspiring. Do wait, not into movies at all. Just means doesn't watch them ever like hates them. I mean, this is a kind of a session letter. I don't know. Eli, I feel like Eli. What does that mean?

What do you get from? Well, kind of change. Kind of TV is the new movies. So maybe he's also not into TV. That's true. And music is the new food. Think about it. I feel about music to survive. Yeah. And 40 is the new 20. Oh, means that we need to eat a lot of, I guess,

so 40 ounce now, and only have 20 ounces in it, or is the other way around. If you're drinking, we'll get to this later. OK, yeah, Dan, the letter. So he doesn't like movies. Yes. My friend, however, is an aspiring director who's actually made some pretty bang-in short films.

With candlelight, with candle lights popping off, I was hoping you guys could give me a little insight into what to get her. Do you know any good books about directing or movies or really anything that isn't just like buy her a movie set? Do you buy movie sets? God, probably.

What's a movie, like the place they shoot a movie? I'm so ideal, you say. I'm so lost and I just spent half an hour desperately googling every movie buzzword from your podcast. I'm gonna drink your water. Do you drink it or not? I don't know, maybe. I like that.

Anyway, all right. Well, that water distraction done. So I am so lost and just spent half an hour desperately googling every movie buzzword from your podcast. Keep it real, Eli. Yep, that's the end of the video. Yes, you get to that. Her favorite series is The Hobbit, Lord of the Ring movies, but you already has every

single one and all of the behind the scenes stuff. Please save me. I wonder if, so there's a bunch of good moviesbit Lord of the Ring movies, but you already has every single one and all of the behind the scenes stuff. Please save me. I wonder if, so there's a bunch of good movies about a bunch of good movies. There's a bunch of good books about making movies. Like if she hasn't read like Rebel Without A Camera, the Robert Rodriguez movie about making El Marioci on a super low budget, or there's movies about big budget

movie making that are really good. Like the Devil's Candy about big budget movie making that are really good like the devil's candy about the making of of the bonfire the vanities. The same famous book when the shooting starts the cutting begins about. Oh by Ralph Rosenbaum. Yeah. That's actually that's a great that's a fantastic book. Sydney Lumet had a book called Making Movies I think about his process of making movies like there's a bunch of good good books that are either about the making of specific movies and you can pick up lessons from it, or they're literally about, here's how you make a movie.

I mean, Lloyd, you've never read. Yeah, or it came from the video aisle, the full moon pictures. Yeah, that too. I like the two Mark Harris books, Pictures That A Revolution and Five Came Back. There's a book called the Evil Dead Companion about the making of the Evil movies that's I found surprisingly touching and that

like is about how they how a bunch of friends got together and made those first two evil dead movies basically. Yeah. There's a yeah, pictures of revolutions really good. Five can back is really good. There's a movie there's a book called Final Cut. That's really good that involves among other things the Heavens Gate to backacle and how that screwed up that studio, there's the book, The Studio, by, was it Philip Gregory Dunes, that is named? Yeah, that's him.

That where he just spent a year at 20th Century Fox in the late 60s, wrote about it. It also sounds like your friend is an aspiring director who's already done some directing. Maybe your friend needs one of those giant director bull horns. Yeah, or those, or those job pervers.

Yeah, or a big clapper. Yeah. Yeah, here's a yeah, a job per's, a big bull horn, a beret, and a folding chair. But not one that folds up like a regular phone chair, folds sideways like a director's chair. Yeah. Actually, if you've got them a director's chair with their name on the back,

that'd be a pretty sweet gift. That would be awesome. Why did they all use those chairs? They're not the most comfortable chairs. They're very easy to move around and set up. And you're constantly moving the chairs because you're constantly changing setups. That's true.

Yeah. Well, that was not a funny answer. That's a real answer. Very easy to move. And the people who move them get very frustrated if you try to move them yourself to save them trouble. They're like, that's my job. Just let me do that.

You put it in the case. You need to gig. Probably. Yeah. It's a non-union gig. Okay. So I hope that those helped. That was a long list.

And I hope that other people who are interested in maybe like movie books, and I forgot a little help from that too. This last one is from Doc Glass, name withheld. Doc Brown. Okay. Marty. We gotta go back to the past. I love your butt, I love your butt gang.

It's getting to be that wintry time of the year when I like to curl up by the fireplace and watch my favorite so bad it's good Christmas movie. Grumpy Cats worst Christmas ever, starring Aubrey Plaza as the voice of grumpy cat. Some of the best-casting ever. I like that it's not gender-traditional. I think a lot of people assumed grumpy cat was a male cat. Yeah.

My wife insists that the movie is so bad, it's terrible, and it's a beg me not to watch it again this year. So what are some other options for bad good Christmas movies? Alternately, are there any movies that would not necessarily be considered Christmas canon But that really evoke the spirit or the true meaning of the season grandma's damn. Yeah, no that's don't start in on your diehard bullshit No, all consider diehard a Christmas movie. I mean he did say parentheses like die hard And I have made it that from the letter just because I didn't want to get into that Yeah, cuz he want to be the only one telling everybody at the bar that

Dihards of Christmas movie. So anyway, grandma's. Kiss, kiss, bang, bang. I've never seen that before. Yeah, it's a Christmas. That's a great Christmas movie. Now, it's Dihard 2. That's a Christmas movie as well.

One part of the thin man is said at Christmas. These are not so bad. They're good. These are good so bad, they're good. These are good movies. Yeah. So those are nontraditional Christmas movies. Or like, you know, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like,

if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like,

if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're like, if you're Ralphie and everything. Yeah, I don't like that movie. I like that movie. That's a good movie. Okay, whatever. We can agree to disagree on this one. Also by Bob Clark, you Christmas movie that Halley, and I think you, Elliot, introduced me to was single Santa, seeking Mrs. Claus.

Oh, yeah. That's one of Halley's favorite. What's trying to Steve Gutenberg as Santa Claus is son. Yeah, and Crystal Barnard as the love interest. Yeah, who becomes Mrs. Claus by the second movie in which they're expecting a child? Oh, really? There's a sequel? I got to see that.

Yeah, a sequel you might call it, the Rechipmunk's in it, but's a sequel. I gotta see that. Yeah, a sequel, you might call it the Rechipum Synod, but they're not. Yeah, there's a very, and that fact this gets me into my favorite type of Christmas movie. Look, let's just get one thing straight. I don't give a shit about Christmas. Don't celebrate it. It's not that I don't like it. I just don't have a feeling about it. And I had a surprising number of conversations in the past few weeks with people who assume I'm gonna be doing the rudiments of Christmas celebration I'll be needing none of it, but I do find the concept of Santa Claus fascinating and I love that there are a lot of movies about Santa Claus's extended family. There's so many movies about Santa Claus's kids Many of them have TV all these people have played Santa Claus's children Kelsey grammar Steve good and bird J. N. McCarthy Kathy Ireland

What's his name? What's his name? Who's the older actor? He was on Madden for a couple of seasons. Brian Dolmer. Jared Harris. No, no, no. Older than that.

Cameron was named now. Anyway, there's also Angela Lanzberry starting a movie about Mrs. Clawns, which he steals the sleigh away and starts a labor movement. In New York at the turn of the century, there's movies about, there's just like, there's so many movies about Santa Claus' family and kids, and so many of them involve the kid having to take on the role of Santa at some point, and they are, it's amazing that so many of them exist. I think they're hilarious. Yeah. So just dig into those. Just pop on single Santa seeking, six miss clothes, we're Mr. St. Nick with Kelsey Graham

or Santa Baby with Jenny McCarthy. There's two of those. Yeah. Stuart, do you have any thoughts on this? Or do you not? No. I, I mean, just watch Ernest saves Christmas, dude. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. That is one great guy I get it. I remember where like the whole like the Slay is gonna go down and hit the ground talking about the joke on the trailer Yeah, there was air breaks. I love it. Yeah, and then he yeah, he makes his typical mugging to the camera Yeah, which is you the viewer That's what that means. We're all Vernon.

Jim Carney's world. Yeah. So now we move on to the last segment of the show where we show is still going. You're the one who had 50 pages of notes on the movie. You wrote more about this thing than I wrote in my like senior thesis. Also about inconceivable. Yeah. Yeah. I got a D. This is where we give recommendations of movies. Definitely good. That you should watch movie recommendations. Uh-huh. Dan. And do you have one, Dan? Sure. Sure. He said as if we just asked him out of the blue to recommend a movie. As if he didn't know the statement was coming and then

I didn't know necessarily that I was gonna go first No, I have a movie I would like to recommend the verdict. Oh, that's a good movie starring Paul newman I see in dance had to go on salad dressing Directed by sitting a little bit. No, oh yet is I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it.

I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it.

I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. I have it. the second track. Who gets what should be a slam dunk settlement case about a woman who goes in

for childbirth and the anesthesiologist kill her accidentally and he normally is this ambulance chaser who would settle out of court but he goes and he visits the woman and something kind of wakes up inside him and he's like no no, this will not stand. I'm taking the archdiocese. This is a Catholic hospital to court and He's going to go up against them and he is going up against a well-stocked group of very hot shot lawyers with James Mason at the head of them and

It's just a courtroom drama, but it's more of a character study about this alcoholic lawyer who is refining respect in himself through the job. And it's very good and engrossing and great acting, obviously, from the cast. It looks beautiful, too. Yeah. Do you want to go on a media? Oh, go. I'm going to recommend a horror movie that came out this year called Devil's Candy, not the movie about Bonfire the Vanities. Not that book. Okay. This is where we recommend movies.

So I'm recommending a movie called Devil's Candy. It's directed by the guy, I think it's directed by the guy who directed that. Australian horror movie The Loved Ones, or Loved One, which was about a girl and her father abducting the cuteest boy in school and like putting him through like a nightmareish, like prom dates scenario.

And that, that was a movie that I liked, but was almost a little too, like unpleasant for me. And I think this movie, that was a few years ago, and I think the Devil's Candies a little, I think it's a little easier to watch. It's scary, and it's shot very well. There's, it's a very pretty move to watch. It's about a family who move into a farmhouse further away from where they're used to living.

And the farmhouse has a dark past. The family that lived there before died. And the husband is an artist and he starts hearing voices. And there's, you know, and they have some financial pressures as well. And then there's a killer. But the very, very very the I guess I'll see this movie about the financial So there's some great little performances in there specifically There's a great performance from pru-it Taylor Vince Who you would remember as like the

Hulk and guy and anything yeah the big Hulk and guy who can make his eye do kind of weird things. I'm assuming that's him intentionally doing that or not, I don't know, I'm sorry, but he's great. And he's great in this movie and yeah, so it's a little bit of a difficult watch, but I thought it was pretty great and it was definitely scary. Sounds great and I'm gonna recommend, I'm going to go on lemon recommend an older film,

not something I usually do, not to recommend the Furies, which is Western from 1950 that Anthony Mann directed. He's known for a lot of great Westerns and it's got Barbara Stanwick in it and it's got Walter Houston in it and it's about the owner of a ranch called the Furies and he's one of these guys who kind of runs his land like a feudal landbarron even issues his own money called TC's because his his name is TC and his daughter Barbara Stanwick wants control this ranch and will not stop any well will not let anyone get in her way of keeping control of it or getting control of it. And it's very soap opera-y, but it gets very like intense at a lot of different points.

It's a movie in which not to give too much away. Barbara Stamick at one point, thrones a knife at another woman's face. But it's mainly about control over this ranch and the men going in and out of Barbara Stamick's life. control over this ranch and the men going in and out of Barbara Stanwicks life and kind of how twisted you can become when you clearly have the ability to do something but society has deemed that your role will not let you do that thing when you're brilliant at running a business and society has deemed your woman you don't get to run

a business. But it's also really soapy and good. I like the lot. The furries it's called. Okay, great. Three great recommendations. Yeah, where are you looking at me? You got a problem with my recommendation? Yeah. You did when he thought it was a book, didn't it? Yeah. So that's it for this episode. Thanks as always for listening. There's a lot of great podcasts over at maximumfun.org. Yeah, we just they just added a bunch of new ones. Including a couple. Yeah, they just added, they just added switchblade sisters that's hosted by April Wolf and it gives a female perspective to

filmmaking, which is great. And then they and we also have who shot you, which Ellie was just a guest on. It was just a guest on actually this past Friday. It came out. So it'll be a couple weeks old by the time you hear this, but the episode of Husha, yeah, about the room and the disaster artist and bad movies. And it was a lot of fun record. Was it on to record a show with people who know stuff and aren't just like goofy ding-dongs? They were still fairly goofy, but it was nice to mention a movie and they'd be like, yes, I guess. Instead to mention it and just have blank, empty stares from YouTube.

You told me that. You told me that we were like the funny ones and they were the smart ones. I don't know, they're pretty funny and smart and better looking. They got all. Wow, they got, it's the trifecta. Yeah, they really ran the numbers on that. But yeah, who shot this? It's a real fun podcast, really good.

They have good movie discussions there. So you'd be like movies, definitely listen to that, and switchblade sisters, and lots of other max fund podcasts. Because you know what, it's not just about movies, it's about life. There's lots of good stuff out there. Life is about life. Anyway. Although the Muppets did say life's like a movie,

right around ending. And muppets also said, moving people's these things. We're not gonna write my own ending to a movie. The guy in our owner said that. Oh, right, right. In the movie diner, starting the muppets. That's right.

So thanks for listening and for the flop house. I've been Dan McCloy. I've been steward Wellington. And I'm Ellie Cain with my best buds. Steward Dan on my favorite movie podcast, The Warpass. Goodnight everyone. Who shot just a waypucket? Okay.

Alright, we'll start. Let's warm up. Papa B Papa. Mama Mimamo. What are we in the future segment of that fucking moot that Wukowski Brothers movie? Uh, class. Class. Class. We're in the future part.

We're in talks like that. I want to talk to Mama Mimamo. We need to really build a futuristic language that's the level. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people.

We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people.

We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people.

We're talking to people. We're talking to people. We're talking to people.