The Flop House - Episode #168 - Rage

Episode Date: December 27, 2014

Merry Cagemas everyone! The store was all out of Left Behind (well... it hasn't been released to video or streaming yet), so we got you a Rage. We hope you're not too disappointed. Meanwhile Elliott reads the Looney Tunes dinner specials, Dan reveals the medical source of his word-slurring, and Stuart just can't stop chewing. Movies recommended in this episode:NightcrawlerFoxcatcherFor a Few Dollars More9 Deaths of the Ninja

On this episode we watched Rage! Merry Cage Miss Everybody! Jingle-tingle-tingle-tingle-tingle. Bells, bells, bells, bells, bells, bells. Rain deer sound, reindeer sound. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Everyone welcome to the flop house. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington. And I'm Elliott Kaelin. Not chewing it to the microphone. Like, what is that? What is that?

Stuart Wellington. This is Christ. I was trying to do a thing like I was a horse. Like chew your cud. Yeah, yeah, that'd be a cow. One of our shows was named one of the top 25 podcasts ever by Slate magazine. And you, this is what you do.

You really do. Yeah, I'm ruining it. Well, I'm trying to make that episode seem all the better. Okay. But I started off not as good. I see. Well, mission accomplished. So guys, this podcast is over, packing up.

Yeah. Okay. I was going to say before we went, Mary Cage missed you guys. Mary Cage missed. Hey guys, I got both you presents. What? What? What? You go, Dan, this is yours. Okay.

And Stuart, here's yours, unwrap them. It's Cage missed everybody the happiest time of the year. Rip. Is this mur? Yeah, it is. It's mur, who's Griffin. It's a special mur that's made out of Merv Griffin's bones.

Oh boy. Is he still alive? I mean, you could still make it out of his bones. Don't tell him I took his bone. Dan, would you like your present? I already have some Franken's sense. Can I? It's actually Franken's sense monster.

Can I return it for some Franken earnest cartoons? I feel like what? What? Franken's? Up like this. Well, that was a joke. Just for Dan McCoy's in the audience. As a colleague, you made yourself, right? You're a prankiner. It's a terrible comic strip.

But if the creator of prankiner, it was listening right now, Dan. And they're crying, crying into their unemployment check because of what you said. Now they can't cash that check because it's all wet. What bank are they going to? The bank of dry checks. I'm sorry, sorry, this check is just too wet. But it still represents money, right? Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, look at the sign.

It's dry you sign. This is no wet checks. No wet checks must be drier than this, and it's a slightly damp paper towel. No wet checks. No fat checks. Dan, what are we doing this podcast? No, I don't remember. I think that we've ruined the cage, Miss Farritt.

If I recall, this is a podcast where we examine a cold case. Yes, lonely over time. No, this is- Well, we alpha bits, it's called cereal. Yeah, no, this is a podcast where we watch a bad movie, and then we talk about it. And this is the most magical time. It's the most joyous time of the year,

the reason for the season. Cage-miss. Cage-miss. Now, when we celebrate one Saint Nicholas Cage, or as he's also known, Chris Cage-al. Actually, that sounds too much like Chris Angel. We get it. He's just Saint Nicholas Cage.

Now, we had dearly hoped that we would be bringing to you a podcast on left behind. Okay. This evening, or whatever you're looking at. We may remake of a Kirk Cameron movie starring Nicholas Cage. Well, I wouldn't call it remake. They're both based on the same apocalyptic, Christian literature. I do, sure.

They're both based on the same book series. So it's the Omega Man to the last left behind's last man on earth. Yes, that's what I would say. But unfortunately, left behind is not out yet. I was baffled by the fact that critical, and I believe not even, I don't think it did that well commercially. No, it's number one film of the year.

Why don't you just watch it? It needs over $17 commercially. No, it's number one film of the year. Okay, it made over $17 billion. Why didn't we just watch the trailer like four times and then do it like so down that? Yeah, it would have been great. It would have been really fast. It just seems like it would have been out by now, especially before Christmas, but instead we were forced to go to our fallback cage position

which was age. A movie called Rage. Rage 2014. 2014. There's like a million Rages out there. Yeah, including that member of the Avengers Rage that never remembers. The name Rage for a movie is all the rage.

Okay, I let them in sink in. See if I said that, if I said that, Elliot, the fury that would come off of you. For some reason, when Stuart says dumb stuff, it passes over me like the Angel of Death over a Jewish house in Egypt. But when you say dumb stuff, it kills me. Like the Angel of Death over an Egyptian house in Egypt. Little pass over humor.

It's not the right season for it. What are you gonna do? So, this was a movie. So, and Cage Miss, we watch Nicholas Cage movie. Why we like them. In this case, the rage in cage and, Nicholas Cage. Yeah.

And we watched, right age. And so Dan, uh, sides of this movie, was it a good bad movie? Bad bad movie. Oh, wow, we're not there yet. Oh, okay, sorry.

So we've talked many times about Nicholas Cage being, uh, generally bring kind of one of two modes. Yes. Either the mirror has two cages. Either like super frenetic Nicholas Cage or sleepy. Dower. Mumbly mouth Nicholas Cage.

And unfortunately, Mumbly Nick showed up to rage. With a couple moments of extreme rage, rage cage. Yeah, but very little considering the movie is called rage Exactly, although the original title of the movie was apparently Tokarev Which yeah named after the gun. Yeah, which promises a lot less rage than rage It's also not based on the Stephen King Richard Bachman novel rage rage. It's also not based on the Stephen King Richard Bachman novel rage. So don't think Nicholas Cage plays a high school student who couldn't get it up when a girl wanted to sleep with him and so shoots his teacher. Yeah. It's also not based on the video game primal rage. We're gonna play a prehistoric gorilla monster that farts on people. Farts

on a raptor. Those's winning some kind of tournament Yeah, it's not based on killer instinct. It's not based on any n64 fighting game Stripes not based on clay fighter Which I guess mess in ESK. Yeah, so should we talk about what and rage is also directed by my name to Paco Cabezas I'm sure is a real person with a real name But it sounds like Nicholas Cage directed it. I'm just I'm just gonna cartoon Mexican pseudonym So I apologize to the real life Paco Cabezas You have a funny name

So anyway, let's talk about this movie, huh Nicholas Cage plays a man named Maguire Let's talk about this movie, huh? Nicholas Cage plays a man named Maguire, Paul Maguire. With a name like that, you know he's a badass because he's got a tough ass first name, Paul. We're Paulie. Yeah, they call him Paulie a lot. So Paul Maguire used to be a criminal, but now he's some kind of contractor,

legitimate business man, good guy. He's married to Rachel McNickle. Rachel McNickle. Rachel McNickle. No, there's married to Rachel McNickle. Rachel Nichols. Rachel McNickles. No, there's no. Rachel McAdams. Rachel Nicholas Cade. Okay, sure.

He's married to Rachel Nichols and they have a daughter, but she's his second wife. The daughter is an adoptor. Anyway, he has turned his back on the life of crime, which is good because the whisperiest, gravelyest man in the biz, Danny Glover, is the local coffin town. That town, mobile and Alabama, population 40 and 39 of them are criminals. Because it turns out Nicholas Cage is two best friends, our old criminal buddies, Kane and Danny. And but one day, true story.

It does. I went to high school, the guy named Daner Cain. Whoa. I know, looking back, I'm like, I'm so jealous. Now, see, last week you bestowed upon me the most boring story in the world of war. No way, that is what you do of a name. I said you were in the forefront for the nomination.

I want to put Stuart up for that same prize. Wait, no, he knew a guy who is the kid of life Danter You're bringing in much more interesting. Yeah, it is he's an acting killer. Yeah, but I want to I do want to It's true what Elliott says in this movie mobile in this movie, Mulbele Alba was boring. And this movie, Mulbele Alba might as well be one of those movies in the movies, or the series, what was it? Well, it was movies in the movies, yeah.

Do you even pay attention to what you were saying? No, I don't. I think you should be clear by now that I do not serve. So those movies, like, in the movies, like, angels with dirty souls and home alone. Yeah, it's one of those, those towns that exist in the movies where it's just like, apparently all of the witness relocation has gone to those one towns. Because everyone's a former crew.

Everyone's a former crew. It's her end. And everybody when they hear gunshots do not call the police. They just, they just pull out their guns and start firing or they get no such a chance. You know, somebody's salmon, yeah. Yeah.

You know, somebody's salmon. That's the special tonight. It's a whole salmon. It's a whole salmon that we put a big mustache and a cowboy hat on and then we shoot six guns into it. And we vex it with a mischievous rabbit. We can't be a rabbit on it. We wave a contra rabbit in front of it. To make a man. Yeah.

We know it's done when it says, Concerned Egg Nav. Ooh. It's a set of makes when it's done. Yeah. Anyway, you send me Sam and that's for $37. What? Then okay.

For it's very rare. Yeah. Then for dessert, we got a Yogi berries. No, that was yesterday's very rare. Yeah. Then for dessert, we got a yogi berries. No, that was yesterday's dessert special. Today we have the Elmer Fudge. This is a Bugs Bunny Villain themed restaurant. I'm a yes. Yeah.

Not Marvin the Mars Bar. Why? Good work. It's Marvin the Mars of Pan. bar, why? It's a good work. It's Marvin the Mars of Pan. Wily Kai Yotmeel. Yeah, yeah, super granula.

It was the super granola. I like an appetizer. Yeah, that's right. It's an appetizer oatmeal. What kind of meal is this oatmeal fish? And the orange or Mars of Pan? Before you have your dinner, sir, the chef wanted to send out this amuse bush of meal.

That sounds... And noticeably unpleasant. You could see it as a rather large bowl of old beer. It's more of a menu I mean. It's pretty basic. No, no. This bush at all is a bowl of old beer. Well, you will not be allowed to have your own tray and tell you finish your old

That seems like torture This is a kind of prison dinner. All right eat up sir Pain is coming into the Wait into the what? What is the plane going back to the bunker? The plane bunker. You know, okay. Stop right there.

We're not far into the movie. So the plane is what's playing Hitler? Yeah. Hiding in his plane bunker. Yep. It's very angry. At the end of World War Plane. Yeah. So let's talk to him.

And those planes movies got dark, dude. Yeah. Well, they did that. That whole, like, how do these planes have sex thing out the window? There was that meme where they read up planes, you know? All different. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Plains getting mad about different things. Anyway, what was this movie about?

Oh, well, Nicholas Cage is a former criminal. He has his beloved young daughter. But one night while his daughter is horseing around at home with two high school friends, he comes. Who looked very similar? Yeah, they both. I feel like they could have mixed it up

like those power ranger skins. They're both white skinned skinny dudes with four locks draped over there. Yeah, one of them has like a huge four lock overs face. The other one is. Four lock overs. The gay law student from how to get away with murder. How do you get away with murder?

Well, according to that film, you wrap a guy up in a rug, take him to the woods and burn him. And it's not a film, it's a television show. And again, I'm not listing. Yeah, look, you're not saying. Dan, I'm not listening to what you're saying. Dan, I've been told that the real good film writing is being done for television right now. That's what I hear.

All the good movies are on television, and all the good TV shows are on the radio. Good novels are in the movies. Yep, like Fipper McGee and Molly, and the great Gilders sleep. And all the good video games are on Bzukucho comic strips. Now, okay, Nicholas Cage comes home from a dinner to find that Danny Glover is there. And he's like, oh man, what this pig is going to hassle me again.

No, no, no, in all contraire, his daughter has been kidnapped. And the two boys tell a tale of kidnappers breaking in and stealing her. Now... This is after an opening which seemed to be paid exclusively by wine bottle product placement. There's a lot of shots of the labels of wine bottles, which shows off how classy it is. Oh, yeah, yeah, because they don't drink liquor in this movie. They drink wine.

It's all wine bottles label out. They so they say that people broke in and the police are getting nowhere with their investigation. So Paul and his friends, they beat up a guy to try to find information and the guy tells them no information, basically. But involves them. Yeah, so Paul gets his old crew back together, right?

Yeah, well, Danny and Kane, his only two friends in the world. Because they were all criminals together and it turns out there's something in their past. It's a criminal school together. Something in their past that may have led to this. Nicholas Cage seems to think that this kidnapping was a reprisal for something they did. Now, his daughter turns up dead. So he, let's just cut to the chase.

And after his funeral, after a funeral, my favorite character in the movie, Peter Stormare, as a wheelchair bound, I wish not quite sure about his accent. Crime boss tells him, hey. His little name is O'Connell or something like that. I feel like not so sure about his accent is how they describe him on IMDB. His character is named not so sure about his accent guy.

That was not a very good joke. But anyway, Peter Stormair tells him, bury the hurt inside you. I didn't get revenge when I was putting this wheelchair after a big shootout with the Russian mob, you don't worry about it. But Nicholas Cage is convinced, convinced that this is all in reprisal for a thing they did when they were kids.

When they killed the bag man for the Russian mob, stole the money and his guns and a tock rev gun because his daughter was also killed by a tock rev gun and he they he's like oh they figured out it was us even though that was years and years ago and now they're coming after us so we are now they they got my daughter so now I want revenge and he and his two friends go on a three man rampage through the Russian mob which means multiple times they smash the doors, shoot everybody in a room, and then leave.

Yeah, it's like the video game rampage with three different monsters you can choose from. Not at all. It was nothing like that. And you're not spashing the buildings as fast as they can. Eating the people, yeah. Eating a person out and chewing them up. Yep, filming 11. You don't really want to eat one of those toilets though.

They don't like eating the toilet. Well, this end if you, because then you, uh, you shrink back into a normal person right in your nude. Uh, you're embarrassed and you kind of walk off. You're not totally nude, aren't you wearing like underpants or something? Well, yeah, because it's a video game for kids. Yeah, it's not like you will see some dudes dick.

That's crazy. Now, here's what I didn't like about that game. You had a big gun cello time monster. You had a big King Kong monster, and then you had a giant werewolf. What the hell was that? Wait, you don't think what? Big werewolf would be cool.

I guess it would be cool, but there's no precedent for it. Oh, well, I'm sorry that they got points off for being original, Elias. Yeah, that's how it is. Yeah, sometimes you got to be the first one in the field. You know who didn't get points off for being original because it wasn't original rage starting Nicholas Cage. Let's continue, shall we?

Why? I can't, but. Yeah, what the good object. Here's what happens. Why? Let me just tell the story real fast. So they're trying to get revenge on the Russian group. The Russian group kidnaps Kane, and they're like,

why are you doing this? They say, well, we're getting revenge on you for killing Paul's daughter. Why would I want to kill Paul's daughter? Because we killed your brother years ago. And he's like, what? You killed my brother? He tells Peter Storm, the Russian guy tells Peter Storm, he had to kill Nicholas Cage, Peter Storm, Er, won'ts, there's a little gunfight there. And the Russian kills him. What a gunfight it was. It was a, it's a gunfight between three men and a guy in a wheelchair.

And the guy in the wheelchair almost wins. He's only one of the Ed Moore bullets. Yeah. And a couple more shootouts later. Nicholas Cage eventually learns. Well, he thinks he decides that Danny has been, has ratted out Kane and they didn't to fight any stabs, his last living best friend.

Late he eventually realizes Danny Glover, throughout there's a car chase where a cop car blows up. Danny Glover and every time, every time Nick Liss... He's the most ineffectual cop. Every time Nicholas Cage has a car chase to the streets of the mobile in which cops are in a blow-up car, they must have died,

where he shoots a bunch of people and Danny Glover shows up and goes, hey, just walk away. Walk away and I won't have to arrest you. I really appreciate it if you not go on a ramp. I'll give you one more try to not be so rageful. And then, okay, I'm working on a 74 strike system. I may have to take you in next time. I might have to book you if you kill any more people. It's so clearly that the screenwriter this like arc for Nicholas Cage's character and they're like, well, shouldn't the cops show up at some point? They're like, and I guess.

I mean, they don't even like really give like an explanation for it. It's not like they're old like pals. It's just like, like, Well, David Leverish has been kind of looking out for it. Well, but he's like, he went straight. So I don't want you to not be straight anymore. So, could you just walk away? And it's like by that time he's murdered several people. He's murdered a lot.

And Danny Levers, I guess assistant, I don't know his deputy, is like, hey, this guy might still be a criminal. Let's look after him. And he's wrong. Nicholson, it wasn't a criminal until now when he's killed like a dozen people. He's killed a bunch of people. And Danny Glover's like, some day I'll find a way to put

you guys you and your crew away. It's like, yeah, just go find that body and match the. Dude, there's murdered bodies all over your city. He was in a car chase with crashes and stuff. Put him away. Yeah, it turns out without Mel Gibson, he's not a very good cop. No, and he's the least lethal of weapons. He's like trying to strangle somebody with a piece of spaghetti. A dry piece of spaghetti.

What? It's gonna snap. Yeah. Maybe you could poke them in a neck and kind of hurt them. I mean, it would be unpleasant, not a pleasant feeling. I would like if someone poked me with a piece of spaghetti. Like, oh. Yeah, you'd be like, oh, that hurts.

I guess I'll die now. So anyway. But, uh-oh, did Oh Henry write this story because it turns out the Russian mob wasn't behind Nicholas Cage's daughter's death. Actually, she was forcing around with her friends with some guns they found in Nicholas Cage's closet and accidentally one of her friends shot her in the head and they hid the body in the woods until the police found it. So it seems Nicholas Cage's rampage has been for naught.

And it was but the remnants of his past violence, which he thought he had put behind him, but which reared their ugly head at the most inopportune time, robbing him of the one innocence that he had been able to lay hold to. The real examination of the human condition. And Nicholas Cage calls his wife. Is he a bound violent man naturally? Can he pass that or is it an eight in him? George. Answer the question. You're on trial here. I don't know. Cage trial. So where did he get that

really dark fake looking black hair from? Did he steal it from John DeVolta when they got their faces swapped? I feel like that's extra textural. Here's the thing, Nicholas Cage does not look his best in this movie. I would call him, I guess, hair transplant Gary Shanling. He leaves like kind of a puffy older guy with jet black shoe polish hair. But here's, okay, so the Nicholas Cage calls his wife, tells her, don't come home as an execution squad, approaches the house, cut to black,

directed by Paco Cabases. And then over the credits, we see some police creep in, I guess, to find Nicholas Cage's dead body, and Danny Levers just standing at the bottom of the stairs, shaking his head, when will they learn? Yeah. Did any of the other shaking his head. When will they learn? Did any other job done well? Oh, he's like, well, another case solved.

I'll lock this one away in my crime files. Arace that one off the big board. Stuart, I'm surprised you didn't jump in earlier when we're talking about Peter Stormarers. So you forgot the best scene in the movie. Now this is a scene that makes the movie worth watching, at least this part. This part. Is the scene where Nicholas Cage is pushing to make sure that-

It's right after Nicholas Cage's daughter's funeral. Peter Stormar says, let's take a walk. And so, Nicholas Cage is pushing as a wheelchair through the cemetery. And there's just something about the angle, the shot that makes Peter Stormar in his wheelchair and Nicholas Cage walking behind him, look like he's walking these two tiny legs.

It looks like Peter Stormair is two tiny doorflakes. He's using them walk down the side. And we keep the shot for so long. And once you're appointed it up to me, I could not see it any other way. So it was a real optical illusion. You thought you were looking at a pretty lady and then all the sudden you were looking at an old lady. I mean, that is just a natural passage of time.

Mm-hmm. You thought you were looking at a duck and then you were looking at a rabbit. Again, the natural passage of time. You marry a duck and suddenly in the blink of an eye, it's 40 years later and that ducks a rabbit. A raskily rabbit. A waskily rabbit. I'm sensing a like a bug's bunny theme or... Yeah, or the restaurant the Bugs Bunny theme restaurant that I open yeah That's right. It's mostly like a plan of Hollywood does it have like a mannequin wearing backwards Bugs Bunny and Taz clothes? Exactly. Yeah

And one of one of Bugs Bunny's original teeth is in a case. And for a while in the 90s, it was like hip hop restaurant for some reason. Like don't quite understand. And then in the early 2000s, it was like this weird action science fiction restaurant. Yeah. Do you guys remember that show, Lunatics, Unleashed?

Oh, that was the, it was the, like a sci-fi version. The adventures of Buzz Bunny. I'll tell you when that show made sense to me. Okay. I was in the Dominican Republic, waiting in a very small airport. I had malaria. And it was on a TV in the food court of this very small

airport, it was playing lunatics unleashed, dubbed into Spanish. And there's something about watching in Spanish who was like, all right, this makes sense as the like bizarre bootleg Lune Tunes cartoon produced in the Dominican Republic, where they don't really understand that the characters are not badass action heroes. This makes sense to me now. So I advise you

to watch it in Spanish in the D. R. I report. So the Dominican Republic. It's worth a trip. That shit out. I'm saying, right? It's worth it. We're the trip. Oh, yeah, then just turn around and come right back. Yeah. So Bugs Bunny, let's set him aside. We're talking about rage cage and the cage of rage.

I don't know how much there is. He is after I as rage. That's the thing. Yeah, his rage has damned him. And I'll tell you this. Okay, I'll give you this. The story is thin as all get out. There's not a lot of plot here. There's not a lot of character.

But for a movie that's not very good and is here. There's not a lot of character. But for a movie that's not very good and is very boring, I thought at times visually it had some nice style. There were shots every now and then where I was like, oh, that's an interesting shot. Now there were also a lot of action scenes where you couldn't really tell what was going on. And then it would turn to ultra-slomo and there just be people pumping gun bullets into walls. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I felt like it was a weird mixture of all those kind of bullets. Oh, yeah. It was a weird mixture of like very boring shots and with the occasional,

like a decent shot mixed in there. Yeah. I feel like you could make a tumbler called the Cage Rage Tumbler. You'd have like six still images and you'd be like, this looks like a pretty neat movie. Then you'd watch it be terrible. Yeah. I hate to do this.

Three of those shots would be from that one scene of him pushing people to the mayor. Yeah, but then there'd be one from the scene where he's chasing a Russian guy. And this Russian guy is easily 10, 15 years older than Nicholas Cage. And one of Nicholas Cage's friends, he's probably been drinking because he was at a strip club. Oh, yeah, he was just at a strip club and Nicholas Cage starts chasing him. And one of his friends shoots the guy in the belly from far away. And these other friends is like, what are you doing in the middle of the street in broad

daylight? Just in broad daylight, Nicholas Cage chases after him and it takes Nicholas Cage, a surprisingly long time to catch up to and catch this older gentleman who's been shot in the gut already. Oh, and it was one of those no-striped strip clubs that we've seen in the sex many times in the movies. And this is like, there's no cover charge. That's why people go to those. I mean, everything else is covered up already. Yep. It's a negative two-drink minimum. This is a lie to drink, so show up. This is a sort of movie where it confuses me the most, though, where it's like.

There's clearly enough like violence and swearing. Yeah, people are raging. I don't know. There's not that much swearing. I think this might have been a PG 13 movie. You think so. It's pretty violent, but it's not. We just get tricked into watching a PG 13 movie. Yeah, this is the happens. We were born. Was that a PG 13 one? What? What was the one with the where the poster was the girl looking in the mirror? Oh, I? What was the one with the, where the poster was the girl looking in the mirror? Oh, I think it was so long.

You were talking about the butt. The butt, yeah, that butt-hard movie. It was, it was like, it was like, you're trying to be a butt. You're sold on a butt. Exactly. It's amazing to me that in this day of a day and age, you can still sell a movie on the image of a girl,

the promise of a girl's butt. That's still enough to sell a film. Yeah. So Dan, you're saying. I mean, that's like a real flashback to the Roger Corman days. Or like the cheapest special effects. Just slap a butt on the poster. You double check in.

I mean, I guess that's Tinto brass his whole career. I was trying to look at what the rating was. He pays off the promise of butts. That's for sure. I'm not fighting it. So maybe it was unrated. Yeah. Is this released in the i don't even know that i do not know

was this a movie that was made we may have had a we accepted group hallucination the gruesolation it's called so this in some ways this doesn't fall into the category of movies we would normally watch other than that

star snakeless cake i mean i'd I think it was released to the theater somewhere. No way. What theater were? I mean, I don't know. Let's call it the cage or it cage. It was at like BAM cinemas at the landmark sunshine. I bet you there's like a ground-round family restaurant where this was accidentally projected on a screen

while children ate free popcorn while they're waiting for their chicken fingers. According to Wikipedia like this is are this is the entirety of the production section of Wikipedia's entry on rage. Filming began in June 2013 in

mobile Alabama. The end that's all. Do you really want to know more about the production of? Yeah. Yeah. Now here's I'm gonna you know want to know more about the production of? So you even know? Yeah. Now here's I'm gonna, you know what? I'm just gonna go out on a limb. You know what this movie is? Mobile looks great. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I think the I play

to live except for all the crack houses in places that don't have a wallpaper. There's almost no rooms with wall paper in this movie. It's like they all live in that one apartment in 12 monkeys that they hide out in very briefly. And there was the scene where Nicholas Cage was chasing that guy and it was basically a direct lift of raising. I hope that that was like a real nod to raising Arizona where he's chasing the guy and they run into a house. They're running through backyards. The dog is barking at them. Like I hope I wish they were like, you know what? We're gonna put as many Nicholas Cage references

into this movie as we can. And they put that one in and they were like, oh, how are we gonna fit honeymoon in Vegas into this movie? That's easy. I mean, there was a source of printus one that we totally missed. We just missed it, guys.

What do you mean? What was it? We're not source for heads. We're not, I don't know what it is, man. I'm just saying. We just don't the movie well enough. We're not,'re not apprentices. Is that what sorcerer's apprentice fans called sorcerer princess? Is that a drug you're taking? I think he should be taking it the way. Side effects of sorcerer friends might include saying random shit, misreading

tongue. I've got restless tongues syndrome. How many Nicholas cage movies that is the worst come on you could ever Girl, hey, babe. I got restless tongue syndrome terrible with that So we'll be saying Well, hey, I was trying to leave some fucking subtext there dude. Yeah, come on. Yeah, how many how many Nicholas Cage movies have we watched a bunch and this is probably the first thing that we could have double checked before. I mean I didn't ask the question. I think we've that's why as a do you I think you fucking remember more than three less than a hundred other than the like the three that have been critically claimed in that time

We have watched every Nicholas cage movie. This come out since the flop since the flop I was started Did we watch we didn't watch the one with John Q's act right? Frozen round frozen dead ground. We didn't watch that so I guess I just disproved your fucking thesis Professor wrong critical critical a clay movie. He was pretty critically claimed that right. I don't think so What's um, you know what Dan? I was too harsh with you and just now and I apologize. I was feeling a little bit of I guess you'd call it rage And I apologize We've been in each other's throats all night. Yeah, yeah because of this damn Nicholas Cage movie Nicholas Cage

Why are you doing this to us? This is supposed to be the most joyful time of year Yeah, we got a lovely weather for a cage ride together with you We just got to wrap this shit up the weather outside is caging the movie is kind of enraging But since we've no place to go Let it cage let it cage let it cage terrible So this is a good bad movie a bad bad movie or movie kind of like Stuart what do you what what what do you say aside from that one scene? Yeah, it was a bad bad movie.

Okay, one scene in which a poorly chosen camera angle. It looked like beautiful very tiny lyrics. I think you're playing. Yeah. Yeah, I I agree. There's really actually going to go for a flight. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. There's really, actually, you can hear in your ear holes right now. We're struggling to think of things to say about this movie because this is about as nothing as a movie could be.

Like, the first 10 minutes of it, I thought, oh, this could be like a very, like, stripped down basic revenge movie that I could enjoy. And then like the last five minutes, I'm like, oh, okay, well, it had slightly more on its mind than I thought it did. Like it was about how violence begets violence. Yeah, I mean, there's a little twist of like, you know, him like going on this whole rampage and not not for any good reason, but in between there's a whole lot of nothing. It's a really repetitive movie too. They just kind of go around in circles, the characters. Never accomplishing anything because of course

they're wrong headed the whole time. But even like, even the repercussions, you could have set up that there were big repercussions about what they're doing, but all it ended up being was this Russian guy and Peter Stormair shooting each other and barging a lot. Yeah. I was actually at the end, but that,

I mean, it takes a long time. I don't know. I think there was a day that was David Glover's plan the whole time was to get the entire criminal under the world of Mookie, Alabama to clean itself out. Yeah. Maybe he's like, that's natural selection.

That was more of a force to try to to plan off as that afterwards. Down the police had to. Like, everything turned out just as I thought, oh, damn it, Danny. You let several shootouts go on in your town. Dozens of people are dead.

There was a car chase. Yeah. All the play according to plan. That is my tea was a bit of pure luck. You might say I was the predator too. I guess my mind is quite the lethal weapon. I love it. No longer will mobile Alabama be a grand canyon.

Nicholas Cage will see in the color red, but all I see is the color purple. I'm forgiven. He's not in that. Yeah, he is. Danny Glover. Danny Glover is totally on for good. What character is that?

What's his character's name? Is his character's name Morgan Freeman racist is a gene actman. Yeah, it's a character named Richard Harris. So anyway, I also give it a bad bad. This had potential. Any movie called rage with Nicholas Kay. You know, I think you've Silverado. He's Silverado. There's so different. Well, gobs and days of movies. I mean, they're about Western. He was an irreversible. I'm sorry, I was thinking of who friend brought you a rabbit. Kevin Klein was in unforgiven, right?

Yeah, yeah. And Jeff Goldblum. Yeah. And his sexiest westernist. You guys, and suck it. You're not just racist. You're Western racist. All Westerns look alike to you.

I was watching that movie blazing saddles. Oh no, no, no, I'm sorry. Why at her? I was watching that movie stage coach. Oh no, no, no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It was a million ways to die in the West. Oh no, he shouldn't watch that.

And I give it a bad bad. Could have been potential. Could have been sure to have been. I would rate this one only for the cage completist. Watch stolen again before you watch rage once. I'd even watch seeking justice before this one. Yeah, seeking justice had some funny stuff in it. I want to go buy those candy bars to show that he wanted justice.

I see. I think I, I think the which had a demon finally. I think I may still think the which had a demon fight, please. I think I may still watch this before Bangkok Dangerous. Yes, I would say this is the second worst we've seen with Bangkok Dangerous is still the worst. Because at least this movie, there's some rage in Bangkok Dangerous, there's nothing dangerous.

Not even date. No, it's barely in Bangkok. Mostly takes place in the Bangkok suburbs. So Bangkok Heights, they call it the Bangkok palisades. Moving on. Um, dot org. We have sold out our live show at the bellhouse. What, what, what, what?

It's crazy out. There are no tickets left. There are none. Not even if they sleep with you, Dan. Well, we can work something. That was creepy. I'm sorry. I introduced it super creepy to me. No, but but here's so thanks, whoppers for selling out the art show weeks ahead of when the show actually was. And if that thing, Dan just said creepy out, you can't return those tickets. No, no, non-refundable. But the office still open. No.

Creepy. But we did want to say that if you're coming, if you want to make a night of it, if you want to come to risk the podcast that's on before us. Yeah, Mr. Kevinhausen. Of the state. Yeah Yeah true stories boldly told If you use the code flop house fan at checkout you can get those tickets for $10 As opposed to 12 as opposed to 12 dollars advanced tickets or 15% saving so I don't know math no So that code again is flop house fan when buying tickets or risk, which precedes us,

and it starts at eight. Yeah, and we're awesome. 10. So I just wanted to give you that. So what's the code again? A flop house, a flop house. And hey, we got another thing to plug, don't we? What's that? Now, it's coming out today, came out today, the day we're recording this, but maybe you'll still get a chance to buy it in stores of essence sold out. But a little comical book we've been talking about called Flash Gordon Holiday Special. Yeah, the internet is on fire.

Somebody put it out. Don't wait. Let it burn because the Flash Gordon holiday special is awesome. And on fire. Wait, I'm not don't really read the logic. Oh, well, there's three stories in it. Each one written by a different flop house go host. Their names are Dan Stewart, Nellie, and they're totally radical.

You know, for fun game, you could not look on the inside cover and try and guess who wrote what? It's not that fun. No, I mean, if you're a lonely child with no friends, sitting at home, you can do that. I know. I want you just gonna tell the the darkness. Yeah, you're just gonna make those guesses out And then once you if you get right, you can do the fucking Bob a two. If you're back here, if you get it right, you can quietly go to yourself. And then masturbate to the red Sony ads in the back of the comic. So that's a good ton.

That was the best part was showing a guy at work, showing one of my customers when I was at work, the comic I wrote, and they always stop at the red Sony ad. And I'm like, I didn't write that. They're like, mm, maybe you should. She devil with the sword you say. Um, but why is it always buts with you now that we have gotten through that nonsense. I want to plug something.

Oh, so add on, uh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, surprise plug. On February 21st in the next year, that's 2015. At the Alamo Drafthouse in Yonkers, New York, they're going to be screening a rare 35 millimeter print of the movie Castle Free. What? What the Digong ripoff? Indeed. You will see the Digong ripoff in the flip. Just joking. It's going to be on screen. I'm going to be there. It doesn't exist. There may be some other special guests. Tickets are going to go on sale in January. That's February 21st. I totally recommend it. Super fun. Alamo Drive Test. So, Yonkers, New York, moving on. USA.

Moving on. USA. Land of the Earth. Jated R. Is playing at the universe. Hello, I'm Tucker, the Elephant Medi-Sian. Moral Hi-Turk here, the Master of Clerical Magic. I'm Magnus Burnside, it's the fighter. Did you guys like that? Did you, the listener, like that?

You were just swept up in a world of high-fancy magic where anything can happen and anything is possible I am Griffin McRoy Dunga-Macher for the adventure zone a new podcast on maximum fun in which magic and mystery intertwined for a very Erotically charged role point experience you can catch it every other Thursday here on maximum fun.org or IT's it's for Dungeons and Dragons, but with family It's for Dungeons & Dragons, but with family. Hi, this is Dave Hill from Dave Hill's podcasting incident on the Maximum Fun Network. I'm here with my lovely and talented secretary, Miss Shayna Feinberg. Shayna, I understand you've been doing a bit of research to find out what listeners think of the show. Yes, I have Dave.

And what have you found? Well, people that love it, say they love it because it's just Dave hanging out with someone in his apartment. Awesome. What do people that hate it say? They hate it because it's just Dave hanging out with someone in his apartment. Oh, listen to Dave Hills Park castings and on the maximum fun, what mother's f***ing was that too much?

No, I think it was perfect. There's from listeners. We love them. The next segment. You write them, we read them. You eat them, we see them. We feed them. You write them, we read them, you eat them, we see them. You beat them, then you greet them. Leedom. Cheat them. Thanks. So this first letter is titled. Let her in. She's a letter. Let her in to your mailbox letter in. It's a letter for you and the lady But a letter It's a piece of paper with writing on it, but there's something distinctly feminine about it

Can't quite explain it. Maybe a woman was reincarnated as a letter or a tree made into paper for us to write a letter. I don't know which beyond my understanding. Some hair turned her into a tree. Yeah. The important thing is it's a letter. Letter in. Letters was taped in front of a live studio audience. Thanks guys, or specifically, yeah. Sit letters sit. Rough. Good letter.

This goes a little something like this. Dear Dan. Something like this or is this the exact text of the letter? I mean, I made paraphrase. Yeah, he's mixing it up. Dear Dan, the real McCoy, Elliotalen Kalen and Stuart beefcake Wellington. If the crypt keeper open to Chinese restaurant. This feels like a trap.

One would it be scary out or die in? Two would he serve Montgomery and his three would he serve Boo Goo die pan? I feel like this is more of a pitch than a letter. Yeah, three. We serve Boo Goo Die Pam. I feel like this is more of a pitch than a letter. If he played a joke, would he put Creepy in your Coke? Not to be confused with Creepy, the urine of the Creerace. He's up the magnificent work. Sweet pea garfunkel, name hell-blovingly.

So what did that have to do with us? I mean, we love the quick love for it as fun. That's pretty much it. I know that the Cryptkeeper, who had the Cryptkeeper marry to Chinese woman, it doesn't mean that they have to open a Chinese restaurant. She's very sweet. Oh, okay.

And very happy to have you. And understanding. Yeah, you have to be when you're married to a Cryptkeeper. I have to have a great sense of humor. Yeah, cultural misunderstanding One of them's Chinese the other ones are cool But the thing is there's so many great opportunities for puns in the Chinese language And she really supports his his interest in getting dressed up for stuff Putting on costumes and like succedos and things he puts tuxedos and like Dracula costumes on

How are those two things different? What a mask like an ass guy. Like a bunch of metals and shit. Now is there something about her being a Chinese woman, specifically that makes her more supportive? No, I'm just saying that she's very. No, she's just a very nice lady. Okay.

And not everything is about race. Well, everything is. I'm gonna tell this point. It seemed like it was big about race I didn't we're thinking is her name's Julia. He's never called her Gulia. No out of respect. Yeah It's a foundation of respect. Yeah, so that was a marriage guys. He does actually all although occasionally say that he'd like to Stake loved to her and he holds up like a vampire steak, you know, yeah She puts up with it.

And there was some misunderstanding when at the wedding, they said, do you take this woman to be your lovely, wedded wife and he goes, I die. So do you mean I do? They're like, that's not even a good one. No, it's not a good pun and you have to say I do. It's legally binding, sir. Uh, crypti. You've got to say the right words, you're not going to be married.

And his wife, Julia, was like, Crypti, for me, can you please be serious for once? All right, for boo, Julia. She's his boo anyway. This one goes like this. My boyfriend loves y'all. So was the old witch his his best man or the old Which was the main of all the vault the vault keeper the vault keeper was the best man. Okay. Oh

Wow, so she she's in with his friends if she's been the old witch was this made of honor. Oh yeah, yeah. Oh No, no Julia was quickly became part of the gang Great. I'm glad that all of us were. Was William Sandler, and I'm great. I'm great that this fictional marriage was working out well. And they're not gonna give the most. Is there a mean or why?

You know what I did? Communication. Is the foundation of any marriage. I respect. I think we've already talked about that. And the ability to laugh together. Yeah. Thank you.

So William Sandler wasn't blinded. Yeah. William Sandler was actually the, I'd perform the ceremony. Oh wow I didn't know he got in duck or dainty in the church of life online Yeah, he's like I hope you have a good it's ironic because he played death in the bill dead movie. I hope you have a good Demon wedding night. He said because he's in the movie demon. Yeah. yeah, yeah. If he was like, yes, I get the joke. He really saying was that. It's a minor effort. This Miller was there. Matt Fruer was there.

That's because of Bordeaux blood. Sure. Matt Fruer was there because of Max headrom. Max headrom. He's the head rom. So this letter goes like this. My boyfriend loves you all more than he loves me, really. Wow, that's the same. He's listening to that after that last bit. No, he is shutting it off and declaring himself flop free since 24th. He's looking around his room and all of his flock of flop collectibles to throw them away.

Just torching them. Yeah. Just do them. Lighter than aerosol can. He's listened to every episode twice, and sometimes mentions your names like your close friends. So I've done what every jealous girlfriend does and checked out my competition. Now I know nothing about movies,

so pretty much everything you talk about goes right over my head. But after you admit, I've been enjoying listening to the flop house. You will have great chemistry. Elliot's voice makes me giggle. And sometimes you talk about goes right over my head. But after you admit, I've been enjoying listening to the flop house. You will have great chemistry. LA's voice makes me giggle. And sometimes you talk about a cat. So great. I wish I could say that I don't enjoy listening

to the podcast, so I'd have a legitimate reason to be better, but unfortunately I cannot. I'm willing to share my boyfriend with you and even make nice videos. I think you misunderstood our feelings. We just want them on weekends. But I reserve the right to terminate the relationship at any point. Okay, boys, okay, good.

Glad to be able to get that off my chest. Thanks for reading McKenzie. Yes, Castle Freak, seriously? Yes, some more. If you happen to read this during letters, Richard, I love you. Oh, that's very sweet. Yes, I hope that they haven't broken up in between times. Wow.

Way to go to the dark place, Dan. We told a beautiful story of love between an old crypt keeper and Julia. I'm just saying that's how long it takes me to get to some of these letters. Well, when's that letter from? Lost to the mists of time. I'm just sure. Sometime before the third Martian rebellion. Like, gorillas in the mist. These are the days of our lives.

Was that between the guys with the four arms and the tripods? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was the war between the Martians from more the worlds, the Martians from John Carter and the Martians from out of the silent planet. Was Alan Moore doing the script or... Yeah, yeah. Okay, so... But then he disavowed all knowledge of it.

It was okay, and then got kind of weird with weird sex stuff. Well, that's the thing. It turned into all the characters having sex with each other, and then Orlando showed up because he loves that character even though nobody else does. Hilda Swinton does, dude. Well, I guess it's the same character, but it's only, if only Borlando would show up. So this letter from Alic last name with held who writes in the any which way you can episode,

you fellows express some discomfort concerning Clyde's treatment of his orangutine consort. And while the kidnapping and sexual harassment, yes. And Philos complicity and his apparent great ape date grape. But somewhere, somewhere trying to mix up day and I like it. Somewhere in the deep recesses of my consciousness, a light went off and I re-examined a passage in a book I'd read once on evolutionary psychology. I remembered correctly, the majority of orangutan companies would be considered rape by human standards.

Let me explain. No, please. Sexually mature male orangutans fall into two categories, langed and unflanged. Sexually mature orangutans fall into two categories. So I'm differently known as goofesses and gallons. Goofess orangutans play instead of helping their mother set the table, whereas gallon orangutans set the table and then say thank you for a delicious meal. Can I buy a book to find out which one I am

from Spencer's gifts? Probably. Right next to the card of Michael Angelo's David with a big dick. Langed nails are older. It's set for like a birthday. It's like a birthday. It's like a ladies birthday or a bachelor at party. Okay.

I would think it'd be for like a guy's birthday because they think if they're getting older, they're dick-skilling bigger, right? No, no, for the guy's birthday is the part of the Mona Lisa with her top down. There's a blue thing in it. Spencer's gifts, being crass and crude, since whenever it started.

Also, it has that globe where you put your hands on and there's static electricity. Yeah, yeah, it's called a static globe. That's where all the nerds hung out in Spencer's. I was by the truck nuts and guns and roses t-shirts, it's funny. But anyway, flange moils are older, 15 to 20 years, and I've reached this age in absence

of any other flange moils. Oh, I'm glad we got that. Flange moils. They have the characteristic cheek and throat flaps and longer hair. Unflange males are somewhat younger and or have reached maturity in the presence of a dominant flange male.

Does anyone explain what a flange is? Yeah. Though flange males attract females with a long claw. I'm just going to assume it's kind of a spring that has like a fake eyeball on it. And protect their herms by roving unflanched males. The unflanched like a heroclad are able to mate only by force.

Points to Dan, if you made it through the above paragraph without tripping over his booze numbs too much. Zero points. Anyway, it seems therefore that rather than being morally dubious, any which way is treatment of orangutans, sexuality is merely accurate. As we're heard, I would say, any which way but loose represents the inherent brutality of romance in the animal kingdom. A world where true love is but alive and all sexual relations about a battle between one set of

chromosomes over another. I mean the next sentence basically says that it actually forces us to acknowledge the species specific evolutionary basis of our own sense of right and wrong. Please know I would never stand behind. When you stare into into the glide, do energy. You stare into the abyss of your very soul. I would never stand behind any act of human on human sexual violence, but when it comes to... I hope so. Even our... I hope...

Taking a big stand there, buddy. Yes, this is bold stance. Yep. Same kind of stand to like a Nickelback song, guys. That's so true. Like they get songs like... They all like... it's not cool to beat up a woman and shit like that. Like no shit. Yeah continue. They're they've got like a song that's called Candy is sweet. Just like a very basic thing. Okay, maybe the least creepy thing anyone

could have ever said and out of Dan and sounds creepy. You've mastered creepyness. I think you could say anything and make creepy. Just go like, it's raining today. You're like, grandma says hi. You're a master's what I'm saying. I can only bow at the feet of the master. Okay. Well, regular creep show.

Thank you. You've successfully made me feel terrible about myself. But when it comes to even our closest cousins, who are we to judge? Clearly, Buddy Van Horn feels the same way. My cousin, Sarah and Jill. Yeah. So anyway, that's from unflanged males. Flanged males for that matter.

All right, well, Alex, last thing with help. Thanks for your, your, your our rank of hands really close as cousins closer than chimpanzees. Ask the letter. I, uh, letter. Yes. Our rank at dance really are closest cousins.

Maybe to you, Zing, burn. That was weird. That was a really, a lot of other word letters. Disassassie, little letter, but the burn, the quality weird. That was a really sassy letters. Sassy little letter, but the burn, the quality of the burn was pretty low. I feel like. I mean, yeah, it's a letter. You got to, you know, sure. You're getting on a curve. Yes. Trouble with the grading on the curve.

So, all right, this last letter. Just tell me, is the word flange in it? No. It's titled urgent question exclamation point and urgent question. Okay, you're gonna want to make sure to butcher that Urchin pretty carefully to get the right meat out of it Don't watch out for the spines Yeah, there's little kids who live on the street You want to have the urchin clean your chimney before you purchase it. Were you a birchard? It's where you turn it into a birch street.

Ever since I had sex with Zeus, hair had birch that urchin. We call it bircharding. Getting totally birched. Okay. Urgent question. Dear flop house. Dear flop house. Urgent question.

Yes. What Julie Andrews movies are worth watching? Lewis lasting with health. What Julie Andrews movies are watching? Yep. Well, there's the Americanization of Emily. Yeah. That's a good one. Yeah, sure.

Yeah, sure. Mary Poppins. Yeah, yep. If like me, when you were young, you had weird sexual feelings about Mary Poppins. You want to watch SOB so you can see Julie Andrews Toppilus. I've never seen the movie all the way through, but my mom's a big fan of Victor Victoria. Victor Victoria's not there. Yeah.

Is that it? I mean, it's, there's, I, maybe, there's not a lot of, I mean, she's in like sound of music, but it's not that good a movie. No, yeah. She's in like the Princess Diaries, that's a more recent Julian Andrews. Yeah. I'm gonna check to see if she's in on for given.

Yeah. Yeah, she plays the duck a dance, right? That would be a totally different movie was Julie Andrews. Why not give a president? Uh, yeah, one of the movies is she and Dan. She hasn't done. She knows she was, uh, she has some voices and Shrek. So not good. Nothing did nothing good there. I recommend Shrek. In fact, it's not Shrek. I'm ended. There's an on-golden pond, a TV version of that though. Okay, I haven't seen that version of it. Fine romance.

Juliandres. Juliandres. This is even. You tune into the podcast. Damn, looks up Juli Julian's movies on his phone while you listen. The pink Panther strikes again. Which one is that? Is that the one with the laser that's going to destroy the earth? Yes, that's the duty laser. Okay. That's a good one. It's all right. Of the pink Panther films. I think that's, you know, like that's second

or third after shot in the dark. I like what's the one where with Christopher Plummer is the Phantom. I think that's my second favorite. It's either return, I think it's return of the Pink Panther. That's the one with the stuff about asking about if there are any rooms at the hotel, right? Right. And he arrests that, the guy who's the one with like the monkey that's begging us. Good though, does he bite? Yeah, I think so.

There's a lot. There's a lot in that movie of Frenchman non-understanding Peter Sellers French accent. So Julie Anderson is not in that. Not in that. It's just so good. And apparently not in that many good movies, even though being in ICAM.

So so here's what you're going to do. You're going to take a picture of Julie Anderson. You're going to cut it out. You're going to put it on your TV screen. Now every movie you watch is Julien Rous in it. I don't care what movie it is. Nightmare Before Christmas, Space Balls, Jurassic Park, Ghost Busters, Birth of a Nation, Julien Rous is in it now.

Oh, Sherlock Julien Rous. Wow, that's Julien Rous. There you go. Fantasia with Julien Rous, here it is. The land that time forgot. Sure. The land before time. Sure, she's in both those.

Maybe the last dinosaur. Maybe the last dinosaur. Julien Andrews is in it. Look, if you want to see Julie Andrews meet a dinosaur, you're going to have to do it this way. So this has been one of the weirder episodes we've done. One of the more lackluster. Yeah, no, I think that let's say you're watching that old California Raisins TV specials. So Julie Andrews on that. The lackluster. Maybe you're watching an episode of ER. Julie Andrews it. The lacklusterness has an episode of ER Julie Andrews it the lacklusterness has led to the way you're watching the town called panic throw Julie Andrews on that I don't know that it's a it's a French cartoon was Julie Andrews on it she is not in it unless you

put a picture of your screen yeah you're gonna have to do the voice to the doors open you want to see Julie Andrews on the voice stick Julie Andrews on your screen watch my fair fair lady and imagine that she was cast in that. Watch sound of music. Stick a picture Julianters on there. It's like multiplicity with Julianters. Now watch multiplicity. Put Julianters on there.

It's like multiplicity with Julianters. Is anything like virtualosity with Julianters? It is if you put Julianters on the top of the TV there. Lawn more Julianters? Yes, it's Lawn more man with a picture Julianters on it. Julianters of the corn? Again Lawnmower, Julie Andrews. Yes, it's Lawnmower, man, with a picture of Julie Andrews on it. Julie Andrews of the corn. Again, you can make it happen. Uh, um, so vampire 100 Julie Andrews.

Just watch vampire 100 day stick Julie Andrews on the board. Our bodies of Julie Andrews. You got it. The Keeney car wash company with Julie Andrews. You can make it happen. Sure. Those were letters. And look, animal instincts, one, two, three, or four night eyes,

but Julie Andrews on there. Um, they were very useful. A manual and Rio distinct Julie Andrews on the screen. But now we have to put those letters behind us. Halloween three Julie Andrews it up. And season on the whip. Season of the Julie Andrews with moving to start track to wrath of calm. No, no, no, my friends start track to wrath of Julie Andrews with moving to start trek to wrath of come no no my friends start right to wrath of Julie Andrews recommendations fairs viewers day off looks like Julie Andrews is taking a day off and next time that happens is

recommendations Dr. Strange love Dr. Julie Andrews love recommend movies that we see back to Peter Sellers I guess that we know well or sure Robo's Julie Andrews Buckaroo Andrews across the eighth. I just leave the room and this could keep Wait, is Julie Andrews the same as Julie the crypt keepers new wife? Julia, you mean? Oh, Julia, that's right. Julia Julia Julie.

Julie's short for Julia. Julia Andrews is the last crypt keepers. That's the interest is so she became Julia Andrews when she married Cryptkeeper Andrews. Wait, are you? The guy that they named Andrews Air Force Base after, yeah. Because the Cryptkeeper's time in the Air Force. But are you saying the Blackout words is the Cryptkeeper?

Have you ever seen them in the room together at the same time? Nope. Yeah, well, you make a good... Every time somebody puts a Crypt keeper sign up in the sky. Blake at Blake Edwards, my say, see exit. Speaking of which, how did Tommy Wuzo get Jolien Dris for the movie The Room? I'll tell you how stuck a picture of Jolien Dris on the screen.

Can we please move on to record? Big top P we start in Jolien Dris of movies that we've seen recently. Cross of iron from Sam Peck and Boston. Oh, yeah. So I'm going to recommend first and the hopes that I will shut this down. I started Julien Riss.

A couple of movies. She wanted a space bounty on her or I guess she's just in the whole thing. Yeah, yeah, she's just in there. She's just a picture of Julien Riss and Gulli's. Now it's called Julien. Now, does that lower the tension at all because you know that there's no chance a critter is going to eat her because she's literally glued to the TV. You don't know that. She's so charismatic as a still image.

You think she's part of it? Yeah. Sure. You know what? I'm not going to write you anything. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we can stick Julie Anderson in it. I watched a couple of screeners lately. I watched Nightcrawler. I watch Foxcatcher. Now you're writing that as a voter for the writer's guild of words, you get DVDs of movies that are still in the theaters. Oh, yes. I wouldn't tell it was bragging.

It's just a fact. Well, you just threw out the turn of a hundred. You could have just said you saw these movies and implied that you saw them in the theaters like normal. You paid paid full price. If you want to see Julie Andrews in it, you'd have to print out a 30-foot tall poster board image of Julie Andrews. Stick it in front of the screen.

This is what you would hear. Hey, down in front, I'm sorry, Ms. Andrews. I loved you in every movie ever because I put a picture of you in front of it. Continue, please. So what did you see that you really liked? I know, I liked both of those movies. Nightcrawling and Foxcatcher.

They both had problems. I love three syllable titles. Foxcatcher was a little dour all through. It kind of like was pitched on the same level all the way through of sort of oppressive. There's no X-man ending Foxcatcher. There is no other should be. Okay, continue.

But the acting was very good from all of the main Leads your downing I mean it Fox glove. I'm just not gonna do anything Like this question of whether You gotta fake no like it actually adds literally nothing. There's no reason to interrupt with that question Like it just does nothing so let There's no reason to interrupt with that question. Like it just does nothing. So let it roll off your back, dude.

Like water off a duck's butt. Not after all that we've been through. I can't do it. It's a good move. Fox Patrick. I don't got much more to say. You've got to make some views, Dan. That's all I'm talking about.

How dare you interrupt me and I'm done. I'm done because I know that I've become a child who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that.

I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. I'm sure who's doing that. the critique of news journalism and tabloid journalism, but in terms of like a mood piece, in terms of like a thriller of a kind that's not made a lot anymore, where like the hero of the thriller is not actually like a likable person, but you're still kind of invested anyway. I liked it a lot on those levels. Both definitely worth seeing. And that's

what I'll say about those. Okay. Anyone else have recommendations? Well, I watched one screener so far. I was sent to me. I watched Boyhood, which I liked, but enough people talked about Boyhood. We watched a revenge movie today. So I thought I'd recommend a revenge movie. Here's a movie that revenge of the nerds. It's called revenge of the nerds nerds and paradise. The revenge. Okay, so the nerds are in heaven literally paradise. So and they need revenge on God. It's like golden compass series. For making them nerds. They say, God, you're omnipotent. Why did you not place us in a world of nerds? I'm not. They made it into heaven with all their cheating and they're kind of raping.

And date raping? Well, let me tell you, it turns out God is the ultimate party animal, which means he is a jerk. But anyway, a movie, so here's a movie that's not thought of as a revenge movie often, but it is. And it's four a few dollars more, the often overlooked second chapter of the Man with No Name trilogy. In which Leavon Cleef is a heroic character unlike his character of Angelize in the third movie, Good The Man of the Ugly, and he wants revenge against the villain in it for the killing of his sister, I believe it was.

And there's a great showdown where they're gonna fire their guns at each other when a song stops playing from a you know watch that plays this or Either watch or music box anyway It's a movie that I think a lot of people don't see they skip straight from For a fistful dollars straight to the man the ugly Take some time to rewatch for a few dollars more. I think you'll enjoy it Who rat so

Everyone's in law here at the flop house. We receive things from, we receive like DVDs from listeners or from... We receive those body parts and springs and pictures and runaway Andrews. Jelly beans and hammers and snails. The fuck is this a Harry Potter spell? You know, lit rollers and jet turbines and blue whales and quarks. Tire jacks and jacks that you play jacks with autographed pictures of Brent Spiner and Darma Dillows and Peepops. That's an armadillo with a painting of

Darma and Greg on the side. Darma D Dillo and Greg, it was taken off the air and retooled because nobody wanted to see a show about a man who marries an armadillo. So I was also while cooking and eating Dermodillo. He is just so curious about what the Sanle tasted like. Sure. After having tasted, okay. I'm really interested in human flesh. but the Sanle tasted like. Sure. After having tasted, okay. I'm really interested in human footage.

It was a very different show. So every once in a while, we received stuff from listeners and sometimes we even get stuff from... Christmas trees and bags of fleas. Sometimes we also get DVDs from... Sometimes DVDs. Sometimes DVDs.

And we got a, sometimes we get these like DVD collections anytime. It's like bus Debates or something. Yeah, well if anyone wants to send us DVDs that you've made if anyone wants to send us anything Not well, I mean not anything That's funny is amplifiers Wait, people can make that that's terrible's terrifying. Don't send us anything deadly. The tennis anthrax albums. But in this case, I'm going to talk about something deadly. Dan, normally, if it's something that's like like Bimbo babes or something like a DVD collection,

Dan keeps that. We don't get that. Yeah, yeah. But I can tell us about it. He passed along a DVD collection that called that was called Explosive Action. And a week or two ago, I popped it in and just picked a movie, a random to watch. It was called Boob's Flursion. And it was, it was called Nine Dets of the Ninja. It's about a two-man anti-terrorist squad played by their characters are Spike Shinobi, who plays a ninja. So you got to say I'm right, Dawg. He's an, he's an, he's like the ninja character who has a bandalier of, I guess like blow pops.

Oh, that he sucks on after he's done defeating his enemies and then he gives to the children that inevitably show up after one of these ninja battles is done. And then he has his like American cohort, Steve Gordon, who is like a total ladies man in a stallion. Now this movie is totally worth watching the whole way through, but specifically it's worth watching because it has this opening credit sequence where it's like they wanted to make a James Bond style like opening

with like naked ladies or dancing ladies and a little bit of violence. So they have the they have the guy who plays Spike Shinobi. Practice his like samurai sword kata next to a bunch of women who are doing synchronized dancing and their smoke, but it looks like he's very close to cutting them. Like, they just did it all on the same sound stage. So that's totally worth watching. Yeah, so check it out, nine deaths of the Ninja. There's like a great like foe. Dr. Strange Love style, villain.

So, super great. So Ninja has the same number of deaths as a cat. Exactly. I think it's part of a big series of ninja movies, but Ninja goes to Harlem. Yeah, yeah, ninja, ninja Christmas. Yeah, ninja summer camp. Yeah, ninjas everywhere ninjas everywhere all over the blood. Ninja on the moon. Three ninjas. Yeah. They're getting back in the baby. Starting Julian. She could be all three of the

ninjas. Look, the number of Julie Andrews in the movie is limited only by the number of pictures you print out and stick on your TV screen. What if when Yoda said to Luke Skywalker, there is another. He met, I guess he's

faces to Obi-Wan's ghost when he says there's another. What if you met, Julien Drus? What if I told you that every movie could start Julien Drus? I'd say you were going to have to work to you. $4 million at least. I'd say you're crazy. Well, take that down.

It's 1995 plus $40 shipping in England. Wow. What are you shimming it like in an hour? What is it? We pack it like in an hour or what is? We pack it in diamond. Oh, wow. That's incredibly cheap. Then your kid includes what I feed on. You're kidding.

I guess I did immediately devalue the time. Your kid includes one picture of Julien Drus and a form for ordering more pictures of Juliet, Julien Drus. So do I recommend another movie? So walk, don't run to your regular, your local Julia Andrews store. I guess this episode of the plot-patternsers gifts. Ha ha ha ha.

Sponsored by Julie Andrews. Julie, thanks for sponsoring this. She could have danced all night on stage, not in the movie uh... but uh... it's another cage was coming on this one's done we're going forward to say twenty fifteen and now i understand why people say the holidays the most restful time of the year really were that i was really looking forward to cage miss and yet all i got was heart

break exhaustion and some cheesic crumbs in my pants. Yeah, and we're gathered together. Three of us loved ones, gathered together. We're doing this for a while, right? And each other's throats. That's the thing. Three wise men calling a star and that star, Nicholas Cage.

And what did we find? Little baby in a manger, a baby goat. What? What? They called them kids. A harmony Korean film. So we've clearly all gone crazy. It's late. It's late in the year. Julie Andrews should kiss each of us goodnight and tuck us in and sing us a song. We're deep in the winter months. It's late in the year. Julie Andrews should kiss each of us good night and tuck us in and sing us a song.

We're deep in the winter months. It's a solstice. We're going crazy from life of son. I mean, I just got back from son. So I'm not crazy at all. All right. I have a son. I see him all the time.

Okay. So, did you forget your own name? Is that how far gone we are? For the flop has. I've been Dan McCoy. I've been Stuart Wollington and I'm Julie Andrews tonight. We're sorry. So when we start this thing off, the first thing we should do is say on tonight's episode, we talk about a movie called something like that, right?

Not the carry too. Yeah, we should do it totally cool balls, like you just said. But not like wacky balls or mad balls. The enemies of the mad ballons. Yeah. The natural prey of the boggling. There's a thing kids like balls, Dan. And they love bogglands.

And if you slap a face on that ball, it's like a license of print money. Or like, you get that one. You get that one. What? Like a face on a kush ball. Like a ghost ball. Weed who's that law off? We cooosh this ball. I can't make it

president. It's a president. That's unprecedented. There's no president. We have to talk to the CFO on this one.