The Flop House - FH Mini 109 - The Chop House

Episode Date: August 10, 2024

Apologies to the ecologically and morally-responsible vegans and vegetarians in our audience, but today's episode is an exploration of cinematic meats, as Elliott takes us through one of the least-essential top ten lists in movie criticism history!Our live show, Three Men and a Hallie, is still viewable for ticket-holders (or new purchasers) thru August 18! If you missed it, there's still time!

Hey everybody, welcome to The Flophouse. This week it's another Flophouse Mini. That's right, on a normal episode we cover a bad movie, we talk about it, maybe sometimes we like it, maybe sometimes the movie's not that bad. We love to have our preconceived notions challenged so we can grow as people, but that's not what we're going to be doing this week. Instead, we're going to be doing something silly, because that's what we do on Flophouse Minis, is silly stuff. Just doing a goofy one. Just doing a good week. Instead, we're going to be doing something silly, because that's what we do on Flophouse Minis,

is silly stuff. Just doing a goofy one. Just doing a good one. Yeah, one for us. Yep, this is one for us, and also for anyone else who likes nonsense. My name, of course, is Elliot Kalin, and I am in the pilot's seat for this one.

My co-pilots, as always when I'm in the pilot's seats, are my best buds, whose names are? Dan McCoy. And I'm sitting on Dan McCoy's lap. My name is Stuart Wellington. Yeah, unfortunately there's only two seats in the cockpit of this episode. I apologize.

It's amazing that we can both get picked up by the mic so well when you're blocking me. Well, Mike is very strong. He can hold up both of you at the same time. Yeah. Hey guys. This is a human chair. It's a new franchise that Pixar's working on called Chairs,

where it's human chairs. Oh, that was going to be, it was the new Marvel movie, Human Chair. Ha! They're like, Captain America's like, the only way to defeat Red Skull is if I had a place to sit. I like the idea that Pixar's doing a movie about human chairs.

Like, it's done so many movies about inanimate objects. They were going to make toys human toys, but the animation just wasn't there. It wasn't. They were going to make human cars, but again, animation wasn't there yet. They were going to have fully photorealistic faces on that shit. Human cars.

The mind boggles. We all remember when they announced Human Monsters University and then that, again, also got changed. Guys, we're talking about, those are all movies we're talking about because we love movies. I'm a lover of movies too. But there's another thing I love in addition to movies and it starts with the same letter. And that thing is meat.

Yes, meat. I love chowing down on the dead flesh of what was once a living animal. I just like it. I'm sorry, I know it's not good morally, I know it's not good for the Earth, I know it's not was once a living animal, I just like it. I'm sorry, I know it's not good morally, I know it's not good for the earth, I know it's not good for my health, but I just like it. I love the texture, I love the taste, I love the action, I love thinking of, you know, whose life am I ingesting right now and what memories of being a chicken or a pig or a cow will I take to me? The most alienating way to introduce this idea. Oh yeah. Anyway, so I'm, the thing is, being a lover of movies and being a lover of meat, I am particularly attuned to those times when those things go together, when they collide, when

meat is in the movies. And so meat in the movies is something- Meat's on the menu. Yeah, meat's, oh, Dan, did I get, yeah, exactly that. Oh, I'm getting ahead of myself. He's in the spirit. To quote, it's something we'll be exploring on today's episode of The Chop House, the only podcast devoted to meat on film.

That's right, to quote, look, look of the Uruk-hai. Looks like meat is back on the menu, boys. Cue that theme song. Click, click, click, click, click, click. Meat on film. Da, da, da, da, da, da, da. Meat on film. Da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

Meat on film. Dee, dee, dee, dee, dee, dee. Meat on film. Do, da da da da da. Meat on film. De de de de de de. Meat on film. Do do do do. Thank you. That's just a sound alike. That's a sound alike so you don't have to. It's a sound not quite alike.

Yeah. So welcome to this episode of The Chop House. Today we are looking at the legends of Cinemete. My picks for the top 10 best moments of meat on film. The top 10 best times we saw meat in the movies. Now, I know what you guys are going to say. Technically, it's true. People are also meat.

We are made of meat. I have ruled out living human meat for this list because it would have unfairly dominated the selection process. There's just too many good moments of movies that are about people, you know, where people appear on screen. People are- Name one. Process there's just too many good moments of movies that are about people you know where people appear on screen people are one Who's now that I'm on the spot? I'm having trouble with it. I guess when Julie Roberts says big mistake, okay? Yeah, speaking of speaking of meat the two of them man smoking hot that's like about a meat cute

That's like peak human appearance. Oh, no no cuter meat someone's soliciting hot generous daddy and So this is none of the precinct opinions are expressed as the viewpoint of shop house Those are all two words personal opinion. Thanks for distancing yourself. So we're not gonna talk about human living meat I've also made the decision not to include scenes where people are being served as Meat or where we know that meat is people So that means unfortunately we're gonna ignoring a ton of movies out there ton of great movies Sweeney Todd Delicatessen Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 Motel Hell Soylent Green Titus a lot of movies where people get

People yeah a lot. We're not gonna talk about those ones right now So but we're gonna talk about meat as meat, you know meat as a meal meat that gets eaten Maybe doesn't get eaten because of something that happens to it. Do you guys before we get into the top ten? Do you have any thoughts are there any ones that you hope show up there or what? Do you not want to mention it because you're afraid of spoiling my list Because meat does spoil if you leave it out long enough. Mm-hmm I mean, there's so many great food movies out there, but honestly, I'm drawing kind of a blank on the great meat moments.

So I'm curious to see what you can't beat the meat. Let's see. Dan's having trouble beating the meat. First time that's ever been said. What like, you know, like big night is in there some other good meaty movies Rather rather than rather than a rather than hamburger the motion picture Eating roles again human meat. We're not doing that one fuckers That's a that's a homonym. That's a different word that sounds the same,

but means something different and it's spelled different. That's what a fucking homonym is. Jesus, the fucking crosswords are killing me guys. You got mixed up with hominid, which is like an early ancestor of a person, but it's not quite who you're being. Yeah, I think I was. Yeah, so guys, I'm going to, let's get into it, shall we?

I'm going to share a little presentation with you called Top 10 Meets meets in the movies and For if maybe we'll put these visuals up later online No, you don't even describe them. We just put them in this is just for us. I Was I was astounded by there was some production value Elliot, you know Took over the screen did a screen share. Mm- share. Suddenly there's a PowerPoint in front of us. And what does it say, Dan? I'm excited.

It says top 10 meets the movies. You're right, and we're gonna do exactly that. With no flourish, just normal font. Yes, because this is classic and dignified, yeah. So let's go to the first segment, which is called Honorable Meach-chins. Honorable Meach-chins. Elliot, I wanted to say this earlier.

These are things that didn't quite make it onto the list. Yes, Dan? This just wasn't space, but now I have to. I admire that your devotion to the pun is so strong that it doesn't have to be a good pun that sounds like the thing. No. You just like it.

Not at all. I just like sticking words inside of other words, smashing them together. Language is a toy in my hands. It's something I like to play with. You know. Sure. I'm like a modern Shakespeare that way.

You're like a god. Yeah, exactly. So, honorable meets gins. This is where we're talking about some great, let's say, questionably meet things that appeared in the movies but I felt like didn't make it on the list. Number one, of course, Live Octopus in Oldboy from 2003. He just walks into that restaurant, he just slurps up a whole Live Octopus. Unfortunately, that is seafood.

It doesn't really count to the hardcore gourmands as meat. So, can't make it onto the list, but it's a great moment for someone eating a living animal, which is, you don't see a lot in movies. It's horrifying. It's maybe the most terrifying thing in the whole movie. And there's a lot in there. Now, moving on, the next one, Dan, I know you were probably going to mention this one, is the plesiosaur steak from the land

that time forgot from 1974. You know me so well, I guess. They shoot a plesiosaur. You're just texting me about that. They shoot a plesiosaur, and the next scene is it being served as a steak to the assembled explorers? Again, it's a marine reptile. I couldn't figure out if it was seafood or not. Now Elliot, when you watch this, are you so, are you so curious what that tastes like?

You as a dino and meat fan. This is why I wanted it on the list so badly. I've always wondered what dinosaurs taste like. I've always wanted to know. They're related to chickens, but their meat seems to be more like red meat. So are they more like beef or are they more like chicken or are they more like pork? We will never know. That's a question we will never know the answer to. Mammoth meat, we know what that's like because it's been frozen. They've eaten some of it. It tasted terrible apparently. But dinosaurs will never know what they tasted like. And imagine, is it all like freezer burned and shit?

It was freezer burned. It was frozen for thousands of years. Yeah. It has to be lean and gamey is a large part of the answer I would assume. I kinda like gamey. I like gamey too. I don't think gamey is not an insult to me. It gives you, there's some funk in your meat. You know? Yeah, I mean, Stewart's all about games. So yeah. Yeah. I think it's, so we'll never know but that's another honorable mention. Finally the final honorable mention is I thought it was honorable meat chins. Sorry. Yeah final. Thank you the final honorable meat chins I thank you are these suspended sausages from Freddie got figured fingered in 2001. This is undeniably meat

They are sausages. I mean, it's a lot of meat So I had to include it, but I left it off the main list because I find it so unpleasant I find it so incredibly unpleasant to watch and think about so of all the things afraid you got finger like to me This is the most purely funny I thought you were gonna be mad that all that meat was not getting eaten There was used wasted which I don't know if an art project to annoy riptorn I have no problem with killing an animal and eating it but killing it to waste the meat I don't like that, but yeah, it's a I find this I find the scene very unpleasant for a number of reasons

But I had to have it in there. It's an iconic meat moment in cinema. Yeah, you had to, yeah. But it's not one of the top 10. Gun to your head. Conan was standing behind your back, ready to slice off your head if you didn't include it. Yeah, exactly. Now, guys, we're done with the Honorable Meatians.

Let's get to the main courses, this 10 course meat meal. Let's get to the M-M-Meat with number 10, you guessed it, The Meat Monster from John Guys at the End from 2001. This is a movie that I saw in the theaters and I don't remember what happens in it except for this meat monster. So clearly it made a huge impression on me.

It's a kind of poltergeist, I guess, like a figure made out, like a human figure made out of meat, raw meat, and it's just a great use of meat on film. You don't see this a lot where the meat gets to be the bad guy or the monster in something. Guys, what do you think? Stewart, you and I saw this together, right? Yeah, we saw this as part of a double feature.

It was with this and the original Phantasm because this was directed by Don Cascarelli and he was there and did a little Q&A. I was at that same screening with you guys. Okay. I was at that too. That's what I couldn't remember whether, I know Stewart lodged in my mind he was there and did a little Q and A. I was at that same screening with you guys. Okay. I was at that too. That's what I couldn't remember whether, I know Stuart lodged in my mind

because he's such a Don Coscarelli freak. I'm a real fan. But I couldn't remember whether you were also there. I thought probably, because you're still in town. I don't remember anything about it either, honestly. I read the book, John Dives, at the end. I saw this movie, I don't recall it. But you remember that meat monster, right? I think I read the sequel as well. This book is full of spiders

Yes, yeah, I did too and I also don't recall. I mean I enjoyed them I'm this is not a slam against those books. It's more a statement. It's most weed everybody. Well, there's that but also I just Never had a good Well, it seems like you just never had a good memory. Well, I think it seems like you don't have a good memory because you've forgotten that we've got nine more of these to go through. So let's keep moving, shall we? Instead of just going down that path at all.

Dan's basically just setting himself up to get caught in like a three card Monte hustle every time he goes out on the street. Harsh task master. Number nine, this is another one I think you guys are going to remember and you're going to know, that's right, maybe the most meat I can think of seeing on screen at once, the truck full of pork from Road Games from 1981.

Now, I'll admit the meat here is glorified set dressing. It doesn't do much, but it gets a lot of screen time. Or should I say scream time? Because it's a scary movie. You should say that, yeah. I just realized what number one is going to be already. I'm sure you know what number one is. Oh, I think I do now.

Don't say it, but I know you can guess it. If the fans don't guess it, then I'm disappointed in them. But guys, what do you think about the road games meet? Again, you don't see a lot, it doesn't do a lot, but it's in a lot of scenes. They're constantly checking the meet. Yeah, and it's a symbol for the fate of poor people getting murdered.

I don't... Yeah. I don't want to... I guess this is a spoiler, but it's not much of a plot spoiler. Doesn't the end showdown happen amongst the meat? That's what I recall, at least. I don't... Yeah, maybe. I don't remember it well enough. I'm having a real John dies at the end moment here. I don't remember too much else about it. Yeah, I don't remember, maybe I don't remember it well enough. I'm having a real John dies at the end moment here I don't remember too much else. I don't yeah, I don't remember much about the meat I do remember that this was I think the first

Richard Franklin movie that I saw knowing that it was a Richard Franklin movie I saw you know cloak and dagger a lot as a kid but like With my eye out for like I think I just seen the exploitation documentary and this one Yeah, this is a lot of fun. If you're ever like, what if Rear Window was on the highway? In Australia. Was in trucks, yeah. Yeah, this is a good one.

So Road Games, we recommend it. I don't think you guys are gonna recommend the next movie, but maybe you will, it's probably a favorite of yours, I don't know. It's one of the earliest meat movies that I could find, but I had to include it. This is strange that this one is less unsettling to me than the sausages in Freddy Got Fingered,

because this is the wall of sausages in the movie Dog Factory. Now, this is from 1904. This is a short in which these men have a patent dog transformator, and there's sausages on the walls that are labeled with different types of dogs. And throughout the movie, you see people taking dogs,

putting them in the machine on one end and sausages come out. And then later they put sausages in the machine and live dogs come out. So it is a machine that can turn dogs into sausages and vice versa. It's from 1904. This was Edwin S. Porter, I believe,

one of the earliest film directors to really have his name attached to movies in the United States. And guys, tell me about your memories of Dog Factory. I actually do think I've seen this I find the idea very alarming like well means alarming enough that like

Obviously turning dogs into sausages suggests that you are going to like eat those dogs and you know Just they seem to be positing that it's just a good way to store them. It's good. Yeah transformation like I mean, but you know someone might eat them by accident. How often do you accidentally eat sausages? I'm not saying that the actual consumption is an accident. I squirted mustard all over it. A surprising number of videos like that. Someone might be like, some delicious sausage.

I will eat this sausage without knowing that they are consuming man's best friend that alone is disturbing but also the idea that one would Transform sausages back into a dog. I'm just wondering about the mental state of the person Dan this is one of several early silent comedy shorts Oh, yeah dogs are turned into sausages. I think this might be the only one where sausages are turned back into dogs. So this is the least, because at least here, it's not a one-way ride, you know. But maybe it's... This is very... I feel like Yorgo's crib from this for poor things.

Yeah. Now, guys, so let's move past that. It's a little unsettling, a little unpleasant. I think sometimes cinema is out to shock or to force us to question our assumptions about things. So I think that's okay. But not all movies have to be kind of like beautiful bedtime stories that lull you into complacency. But let's go to one that I think maybe fits

that bill a little bit more for you. Number seven, the rat from whatever happened to baby Jane that Betty Davis serves to Joan Crawford as a form of psychological torture. We can see it's a dead rat lying on top, not cooked and not even shaved or butchered, lying on top of a bed of lettuce and tomatoes and on a beautiful platter on a silver tray.

And Joan Crawford is not enjoying it all. Elliot, I don't even see any lettuce there. What I see is like just a bed of sliced beefsteak tomatoes, which to me, like... I think there's a little bit of lettuce beyond the tomatoes. Maybe I can see it a little better because it's on my screen. Maybe I'm wrong.

Maybe that's just more tomatoes. Could be. But like, obviously the rad is what makes this the most disturbing, but I find it immeasurably more distressing that it is just on just sliced tomatoes, nothing else, just like a platter of sliced tomatoes. That's gross to me. I don't know. It reminds me, I was just in kind of recently I was in Barcelona and we went on this winery tour and there is a like

a promised snack as part of the tour. So all of the Americans on the tour like sit down at this table and they basically just give us bread and like tomatoes and they're like a local snack is to cut a tomato in half and just rub it on the bread. Yeah, bacon and tomatoes. Exactly, and which is great, but there's just something very funny about the idea

of like, yeah, you just rub the tomato on the bread. It's good. I mean, it's great. Well, I mean, especially if you rubbed garlic on there beforehand, but like, it is weird to be like, and now you do the tomato rubbing. Sorry, Elliot, I interrupted you earlier. No, to promise that as a snack seems... I mean, would it bother you more or less...

But all the tourists were like, ooh, I feel so exotic. Would it bother them more or less if instead of rubbing a tomato on bread, they were rubbing the tomato on a rat? Or a rat on the tomato. Or a rat on the tomato or a rat on the bread. Well, Dayan was saying his problem was more the tomato. If there were slices of bread with this rat, Dayan would be like, yum, yum. He'd shout it down.

Very amplified by the idea that she just sliced up a tomato and then put it around. I mean, just that she put, she had any sort of garnish or setting for the rat at all, I think is putting more work into it than she needed to. Exactly, I think that's what it is. Now, some will say that this is a bad choice, that rat isn't meat. The way the planet is going, rat is going to be meat. Sorry everybody, it's going to happen.

So, hey, oops, do you hear that cowbell or other meat related sound? I sure do sounds like it's time for a little mini segment focusing specifically on B movies You guessed it movies where beef makes an appearance the B for beef movie This segment of course is brought to you by they brought to you by America's cattle ranchers who remind you and I quote This is what they told me to read for the podcast They wrote they told me to say eating beef is the only thing between us and total socialist demolition of our beloved freedoms. So that's a message from America's Cattle Ranchers.

The first one, you knew, you maybe had an idea what it might be. It's beef, it's probably going to be steak of some kind. Let's take a look. Yes, that's right. It is the overcooked steak from Raging Bull from 1980. Robert De Niro's character, Jake Lamotto's wife, is cooking steak for him, and he is harassing her over how much she's overcooking it.

They argue with each other, and she picks it up on a fork, walks it out of the kitchen, and slams it down on the plate, leading him to overturn the table. Now here's the thing, here's one of the reasons I chose this. That's where the name of the movie comes from, right? Because the overcooked steak is like a raging bull. Exactly.

People talk a lot about De Niro's amazing physical transformation in this movie. What gets overlooked is the similarly amazing physical transformation of the steak to look so overcooked. That steak was in the makeup chair for hours to get that kind of unhealthy char on it. All the prosthetics, yeah. It doesn't get a lot of screen time, but it really does look overcooked That's just the length that that steak went to so and yeah the title raging bull does refer to this the Refers to the cow the bull that the steak was made from and how mad it is that it's also overcooked and it takes over

Jake Lamont his body in that scene. That's why he only turns the table. Yeah, exactly. He's possessed by a by a evil steak Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah now. Oh, wait a minute guys This be movie segment. Oh, we've never seen this before. This is new. We've never seen this in the Chop House There are two movies listed at number five at number five. There are two Louie to look two different steak movies It's a t-bone tie. Holy moly guys. Let's check the rule book. They said we've never seen it before There's something in here that says you can't have a tie for number five. You're right. We didn't think of that rule.

We'll pass a rule later. There's a tie for number five, a T-bone tie. Alex, play that T-bone tie sound please. T-bone tie. First up, of course, we've got, oh, that's right. It's the floor beef steak from the man who shot Liberty Valance 1962. There's a steak that gets knocked on the floor. Lee Marvin and John Wayne argue over who's gonna pick it up

and they're gonna shoot each other over it. And then Jimmy Stewart gets in and starts yelling at him. He'll pick it up and he picks it up off the plate. He picks it up off the floor and he slaps it onto the plate and starts to fall off again. And he has to slap it on a second time. It is a big steak. This is an old West style steak.

No wonder it made it to number five. It's a tense moment in a great movie that revolves around a steak. Guys, how familiar are you with this scene? I saw the man who shot Liberty Valance once, a long time ago, loved it, been meaning to revisit, but do not remember the steak scene, I gotta say. Wow, okay, well, Stuart, are you familiar with it?

You knew this scene? I've never seen the man who shot Liberty Valance. I find westerns to be too scary. I understand. You're afraid that a fight over steak could end in bloodshed. Yeah, especially this one. There's a lot of yelling, a lot of loud noises,

the noise of the steak slapping against the plate, very loud, but trust me. And Jimmy Stewart coming in and being like, no, you're gonna eat the steak now. Kind of, I mean, that is kind of what happens. Yeah. It sounds just like him, especially because John Wayne and Jimmy Stewart are both older than they should be for the roles that they're playing.

So there's an old man, Jimmy Stewart in it. Okay. That steak is big. Let me tell you, it's got nothing on our other number five. The other half of this T-bone tie is an even bigger steak. You probably guessed it. That's right. It's the old 96er from the great outdoors, the enormous 96 ounce steak that John Candy, he'll get it for free

if he eats it all in one sitting. That's from 1988. We get to see it both raw in the meat locker hanging up there and cooked on the plate. And it is enormous. This is a huge steak. It's 96 ounces. Now, do you think they're weighing the bone? They must be, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's astonishing. That's how restaurants trick you. Yeah. Do you guys think either of you would be able to chow down and just slurp up that old 96er

and win the competition? Perhaps as a younger, less wise man, but certainly not today. That's causing me physical pain to look at. Not today. Oh, I got to call them up and tell them not to deliver that steak today. You know, I wanna say, in contrast, in direct contest. Yeah, and now that Joey Chestnut's out of the game, Dan, you could take his spot

as the Coney Island King. I am so disturbed by the idea of food eating contests. I am not a fan. I find it both a symbol of pointless gluttony and grotesque, a perversion of man's relationship to food. But that's another story. I just wanted to say that in contrast to the man who shot Liberty Valance,

which I saw in its entirety once, I'm not sure I've ever seen the great outdoors in its entirety, but I've seen bits and pieces of it several times. Sure, just the nude scenes. Nude scenes in the great outdoors? No, I mean, the steak isn't wearing anything but yeah, we got Stuart I'm sure you've seen the great outdoors at some point Yeah, yeah, this is funny farm were like concert rotation for me

Yeah, those were ones that were played a lot in our house. Also wait great outdoors. Was that the sheep testicles? Or is that a funny farm? That's funny man. Yeah, so that's... A four star review from Roger Ebert, by the way, for Funny Farm. And you're like, he is an unusual man. I was just listening to a podcast with Quentin Tarantino where he's going on and on about how much he loves Funny Farm. What a great movie he thinks it is. I haven't seen it since I was a kid, so I don't know.

But we're not talking about Funny Farm. Those sheep's testicles, maybe they could have made it onto this list if it had 11 slots on it. Unfortunately, it just didn't quite have what the truck full of meat, the meat monster and dog factory have. So guys, rounding out our B movies, that's beef movie segment, there's only one classic moment of cinema.

It could possibly be one kind of towering beef performance. It's so memorable, so iconic, so charismatic, and it has to be the Rock and Roll hamburger from Death Row of Dead from 1985. Technically claymation, it's not real meat on film, but you know what's going on. You know it's representing meat. And the movie is about symbology and representation. Stu, you're covering your eyes, I assume, because it's too beautiful to be able to see. It's just that, like, there's a moment in your life when you realize that things are

made possible through the magic of cinema. And this is one of those moments where me... A hamburger singing about how everybody wants to... Playing a classic fucking Eddie V taped up guitar. It's so sick. Yeah. I love this moment so much and I think we've talked about it before, but we have to talk about it again. I love it so much because it has absolutely nothing to do with anything that is happening in that movie.

The movie just says. No, it's never mentioned again. Otherwise, very tightly plotted movie. I mean, but usually the gags have at least some association of the main plot, but here it's just like, hey, let's check in on John Cusack at his fast food job. He is going to scream to the heavens for some reason, and then a claymation hamburger is going to sing a song.

This is such a weird movie because I feel like a lot of people grew up with Better Off Dead, either seeing it on home video or watching it all the time on TV. I didn't see this until I was like an adult. Really? And it was one of those things where I'm watching, I feel like we all had movies like that, where like you're watching and you're like, I feel like this movie's always been a part of me. Every moment of this movie makes sense to me

on some level. Yeah, this is one that I didn't see it until I was in college. And so I didn't see it as a kid at all. But I had seen, so Savage Steve Holland, the director of this, I had seen his- You've seen One Crazy Summer? No, I still haven't seen One Crazy Summer.

Still haven't gotten it. I don't know what made that summer so crazy. There were zombies and stuff, I don't know. Well, I think it's time to watch it. You got a family movie night coming up, right? Why don't you pop some corn and watch one crazy summer? I was familiar with Steve Holland's work on the show Eek the Cat. I did watch that show when it was on, on Fox, Saturday mornings.

So to me, he's the Eek the Cat guy who also happened to make some movies before but this rock and roll hamburger that's going to round out our B movies segment. And that means it's time to take a short break, you're going to hear some sponsor spots. And then we're going to come back for the top three meet in the movies moments. That's all coming to you on the Chop House Chop Chop is the Chop House. I'm Jesse Thorne. I just don't want to leave a mess.

This week on Bullseye, Dan Aykroyd talks to me about the Blues Brothers, Ghostbusters, and his very detailed plans about how he'll spend his afterlife. I think I'm going to roam in a few places. Yes, I'm going to manifest and roam. All that and more on the next Bullseye from maximumfund.org and NPR Hello teachers and faculty This is Janet Varney I'm here to remind you that listening to my podcast, The JV Club with Janet Varney,

is part of the curriculum for the school year. Learning about the teenage years of such guests as Alison Brie, Vicki Peterson, John Hodgman, and so many more is a valuable and enriching experience. One you have no choice but to embrace, because yes, listening is mandatory. The JV Club with Janet Varney is available every Thursday on Maximum Fun or wherever you get your podcasts.

Thank you. And remember, no running in the halls. Hey there, it's Dan. There's not really a ton to promote this week, so I'm going to keep it super brief. If you missed the premiere of Three Men and a Halley, our StagePilot show that featured one, Ms. Halley Haglund, you can still watch it

until the 18th, midnight on the 18th. I believe that's midnight Eastern time, but don't, why risk it? If you're interested, tickets are still available. You can go to stagepilot.com Slash baby also coming up very soon we are going to announce our new season of flop TV and You know, we're gonna announce it on August the 14th. Why because that is the flop houses birthday. I think it's our

17th this year, maybe 18th. Oh, I'll have to look into it. We've been doing this for a long time. But yeah, if you're interested, look out for that on our various socials. Instagram's a good place to find it. Also, you can find it in our newsletter. All of the information about stuff we're doing is in our newsletter.

If you go to flophousepodcast.com, there's a field right on the front page where you can sign up for a newsletter. And speaking of newsletters, I started my own. It's called Dan McCoy's Special Interests. You can find it by going to Dan McCoy interests.com Maybe it would make more sense if it was Dan McCoy's interests calm But I didn't like the fact that you can't put it in an apostrophe in the URL and so my own

Weird hang-ups made it Dan McCoy interests calm. So if you're interested in that check that out as well Elliott continues to write Disney's Hercules comics. Stewart continues to be a bartender, go to minis and Hincherlands in Brooklyn and watches TikTok videos. Okay, that's it. Bye. And we're back to the Chop House, the number one podcast about meat in the movies that is actually one episode of a different podcast. I'm your host, Elliot Kalin. I'm joined again by the other two members of the three. A meat goes...

Dan McCoy. Stuart Wellington. That's right. Stuart Beef Wellington. Beef Stuart Wellington. Beef Stew Beef Wellington. Yep. Beef Stew Beef Wellington. Double beef. And of course, Dan Frying Pan McC McCoy and let's move on to number three This is a thing you cook meat in it certainly is and it certainly is so going to number three

I think I might get some blowback from you guys on this because I said at the top We're not gonna do any movies where people are served as meat and this one is questionable I may be skirting one of my rules, but I had to include it That's right. That evil meat that we just see for a few seconds in Texas Chainsaw Massacre, when she thinks she's escaped, she's at the barbecue, she looks over and just sees it looks like meat hanging in hell, the way it's lit all red and there's smoke and everything. It is so scary.

It is in a very scary movie. It is one of the scariest moments to me because it is a take. It could be people meat. It might not be, you'll never know. It is 9,000% people meat. You'll never know, you'll never know. And it's also, from this point on, you never know if any of the meat you're eating in real life is people meat or not.

It just makes meat look so scary. It's an indelible moment of meat on film, even though it's a very short one. You know, just because it's set up, it's teed up so beautifully, I want to throw a plug to our friend who we went to college with, Jim Strayer's podcast, This May Hurt a Bit,

where I just recently guested on talking about the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Next Generation, which is the fourth, the one with Renee Zelliger and McComhey. One of my most hated movies of all time. Yeah, I didn't hate it as much as that, but if you want to hear me talk about it, I'm over there. I just find it to be so irritating.

It's very unpleasant, particularly in the middle, where they're all just yelling at each other for a while. And I mean, I feel like that's an element of all Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies, but there's nothing else about it. Every Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies, but there's no, like, there's nothing else about it. Every Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie has a certain amount of irritation. Like, the first movie, as amazing as the movie is, when you're spending time with those kids in that van,

like, you want them all to get murdered. They're so annoying, they're so irritating. Interesting. Okay. I mean, then when they get murdered, you feel bad about it, and you're like, I don't want this. But they say, and in Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2, there's so much that's purposefully unpleasant about it and you're like, I don't want this. But there's a, and in Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2, there's so much that's that's purposefully unpleasant about it, you know?

Yeah. But it's very funny. But this one is just a scary moment of meat. You know, it's the scariest meat moment. Or is it? Because guys, let's move on to number two. Okay. And I don't mean what meat becomes when your body is done with it.

I mean, the second most iconic most iconic greatest meat moment in the movies Let's go to the first appearance of Solo poultry on the list we had poultry as part of the meat monster and John dies the end I believe but otherwise We've been seeing a lot of pork a lot of beef a little bit of dog and one rat We haven't seen any chicken yet, right wild coming from you, Elliot Mr. Chicken, I love the chicken tick tit Elliot. Well, I want to... Mr. Chicken. I love the chicken. You're the titular Mr. Chicken and the ghost of Mr. Chicken, I assume.

It's the ghost from... The sole Flophouse member who has the Popeyes app on it. That's true. It's the lion from the ghost in the darkness and me, I'm Mr. Chicken. So that's what that movie is about. And we're both trying to eat each other because we're on a deserted island and when we look at each other, we see... It turned into me. Now, I wanted to put on other because we're on a deserted island and when we look at each other we see We turn it to me now. I wanted to put on but it's not a movie

I wanted to put on the dancing chickens from the sledgehammer video I feel like it didn't fit that didn't fit the rules, but this one certainly did and it's a little similar It better not be like Bobby August house or some shit. No, it's Stewart. We're not playing games here We are playing road games back at number nine. We're not playing games here. This is real stuff. This is the real deal. It is, that's right, that little chicken from Eraserhead that he's got to cut up. So Eraserhead himself, he's at dinner at his girlfriend's parents' house. The dad asks him to carve the chicken.

He says, why don't you just carve it like a regular chicken? It is tiny. And as soon as he sticks a knife into it, it starts bleeding and kind of dancing its legs up and down to the point that Raise Your Head's girlfriend's mom goes into a sort of ecstatic nightmare seizure trance and has to run out of the room. Very upsetting scene, very scary, but also pretty funny. And look, that's what's so great about chicken.

Chicken can be scary and it can be funny. Light meat and dark meat in one bird, chicken does it all. And so this is the best moment of chicken on screen, I think. Can I say though too that that's the, I mean, obviously the great thing about Eraser had a movie that before I saw it in my head, I was like, this is the most fucked up thing

I'm ever gonna see. Like from this reputation, I'm like, I don't know. I don't know if I can handle Eraser head. Like it's gonna be too messed up or it's going to be too arty or too artily messed up. But like the thing about it is like so much of it is also like a comedy of manners, like a weird, I don't know, like it's all about awkwardness and I don't know.

It's a very funny movie for people who have been scared of Eraserhead. Lynch is very good at taking something and making it scary and weird, and then taking that same thing and making it funny and then making it scary. I mean, the baby in that movie, which is so frightening, and there's that one moment where the baby is wearing a suit with a tie, and it's like, this looks pretty funny, to be honest. Yeah, and the pitch meeting for the movie was he's like, and there's a baby and it's freaky.

Yeah, I think that, yeah, when David Lynch went to pitch the film to prospective producers, yeah. I mean, he does yell a lot, but your Lynch kind of sounds like half Lynch, half Fred Schneider. It does. I want to see, I want to see my dinner, a movie where it's my dinner with Andre, but it's David Lynch and Fred Schneider and the whole movie's waiters asking them to please keep it down. So that's that's that's the undead chicken from a racerhead number two. What a great moment in that movie. What a great moment in meat movies.

It's time for our number one our number one greatest performance of meat on film the greatest moment of meat on film. Can I can I put out what I think might be number one? Give me your guesses. My number one meat on film is, of course, the sequence in the movie Dead Heat, where the bad guy uses necromantic energies to animate all of the meat in a Chinese restaurant. So all the ducks that are hanging

and the giant side of beef all come to life and attack Treat Williams and Joe Piscopo. It is crazy, it's awesome. That sounds like a really solid moment. If I'd ever seen that movie, perhaps it would have ended up on the list. You love Joe Piscopo. I do love Joe Piscopo.

He's so funny and muscular, you say? Yeah, Fuscular is what I call it. He was the Stuart Wellington of his day. Yes, oh, I'm funny. Fuscular you say yeah, fuscular is what I call it So Dan I think you're gonna be able to guess what number one is tell me you were you think I may have Chomping at the bit earlier. What do you think it's gonna be you're chomping at the meat? What do you think I think I may have given you an action figure of? Number one that is my guess Is it the meat from Rocky? You got that right. It's the meat, the punching bag beef

from the original Rocky, 1976. What a performance. I know we had a whole beef section earlier, but you could not put this moment down in the beef section. It has to be number one. This is prime grade A star power on screen. I think it's the single most iconic meat moment, the crowning cut of meat cinema.

He's using the side of beef as a punching bag to show off on TV how he's gonna do against Apollo Creed. And look, as Dave was saying, they made an action figure of this meat. I think it might be the only, as far as I know, the only meat action figure that is not an accessory with something else. You just buy the meat.

And it's because for all, it's a short moment of screen time. The camera is really more on sly than it is on the meat, but it just sticks in your memory, the way that a good piece of beef sticks in your lower GI tract. You know that shit's gotta taste crazy. That's what I was gonna ask, Ali. Do you think it's, yeah, extra tender?

Extra tender with all the fucking sly sweat all over it Yeah Yeah, this is delicious sweat Yeah If that if that I mean maybe that meat is hanging up in a plant at Hollywood somewhere and if you pay a million Dollars, they'll cut a little bit of it off from it for you I don't know but well, I wish I wish I could try it, but that's gotta be number one, the meat, the punching bag beef from Rocky. Guys, do you have any issues with any of the movies

on our list? Are there any that we left off that you're really sad you didn't see? Again, I'll go through them again. Number 10, we've got the meat monster from John Dies at the End. Number nine, that truck full of pork from Road Games. Number eight, the dog factory, dog sausages. I mean, I have issues with that.

Number seven, the rat from, dog sausages. I mean, I have issues with that. Number seven, the rat from whatever happened to baby Jane. I know Dan has issues with the bedding, the garnish on that. Number six, the overcooked steak from Raging Bull. Number five, it's a T-bone tie. The floor beef steak from the Manage Shelter Liberty Balance and the old 96-ter from the Great Outdoors. Number four, the rock and roll hamburger from Better Off Dead. Number three, the rock and roll hamburger from Better Off Dead.

Number three, that sinister evil barbecue meat from Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Number two, the undead chicken from Racerhead. And number one, the meat from Rocky. Guys, how do you feel about this list and what, yeah, is there anything that didn't make it on there that you're disappointed about? You know, what's surprising to me is,

as we joked about my bad memory before, but like the one thing I have a memory for is movies, which causes me kind of a certain amount of like distress in my personal relationships where I'm like, I'm letting like friends, spouses, family down by not knowing stuff that's actually valuable to my life, but knowing all this movie stuff. So it's surprising to me that nothing suggested itself to me

as we went through this thing. Like this shows how- Yeah, yeah. Dan and I were, when we went to the movies the other day, I brought up Mulholland Drive, and Dan spoke for like 20 minutes straight about the DVD changes from the theatrical cut. But, not untrue, but I wouldn't say 20 minutes.

It was like 25 minutes. It did not happen that way. Half an hour maybe? But, yeah, like for some reason meat just doesn't, it sticks in my teeth but not in my brain. Interesting. Well, now hopefully this will give you something to chew on, some movies to go back and take a second bite of do you write all these little puns down on a fucking post?

But audience do you have any opinions about it be sure to write in go to flop house podcast calm and get in touch With us or just write to Dan at his personal email, which is and I'll tell you right now Dan and get in touch with us, or just write to Dan at his personal email, which is, and I'll tell you right now, Dan... Okay. I mean, if you go to the Flophouse email, go directly to my personal email. It will go to his personal email. Yeah, or just hit him up on WhatsApp.

I guess. What is this? Alex, post Dan's WhatsApp on there, please. This kind of feedback also is the sort of thing that I don't know, might get addressed in our brand new newsletter newsletter which I'm still promoting if you want to get on the mailing list for our Are you going to use the newsletter as an opportunity to refute the claims that LA9 make against you?

I mean I wasn't but now like I think feel like an airing of grievances segment would be pretty funny. You have a column that's just like my side of the story by Dan McCoy. Like a little picture of you. Like, what does your family look like? You can go to Flophousepodcast.com. You can plug your email in, get that newsletter. Go to Flophousepodcast.com.

You can plug your email in to get the newsletter. You can send us a letter. You can find out about our live stuff that I'm sure we heard about in the ad segment of this episode. There's probably a jumble or something you can do out about our live stuff that I'm sure we heard about in the ad segment of this episode. Mm hmm. So there's probably a jumble or something you can do on the website. We have a jumble. I've got to get on that jumble that you keep asking for.

Got to make that jumble happen. That's all for this episode of the Chop House, a Flophouse mini production. I have been your host, Elliott Kalin, joined of course by Dan Fryampan McCoy and Beef Stew Beef Wellington. Our show is edited and produced by Alex Smith. He goes by the name Howell Doddy online. He's an incredibly talented musician. He has podcasts of his own and music of his own.

Please go check out his work. We are a program of the Maximum Fun Podcast Network. If you'd like to become a member of the Maximum Fun Network, why not go to MaximumFun.org slash join. Why are you there? Why not check out the other shows and maybe take a look at the merch section where you'll find some great Flophouse stuff that you can buy. MaximumFun.org slash join. Why are there? Why not check out the other shows? Maybe take a look at the merch section

where you'll find some great Flophouse stuff that you can buy. Until then, I'm Elliott Cailin. What? What? Never mind. Until they go to the website, I guess. I guess.

We'll be back next week with a full-length episode of the Flophouse where I'll try to talk about meat, but I don't know if I'm really going to get it in. I'm Elliott Cailin. Elliott has trouble fitting crap into our episodes. This has been Elliott Kalin with my co-hosts. Jesus, you said my name before,

so I thought it was safe to say it. Stuart could have said what I liked is that Dan was taking a drink. Stuart, instead of jumping in and saying his name, then waited. He was like, let's see how this plays out. Stinker face, stinker face. I'm Dan McCoy.

And I'm Beef Stew Beef Wellington. Bye. And we're saying we'll meet you at the movies. Well, I guess we are saying that. Maximum Fun. A worker-owned network. Of artist-owned shows. Supported.

Directly. By you.