The Flop House - FH Mini 118 – Getting to Know Stu

Episode Date: December 14, 2024

Though we've done our best to not let it disrupt the show, Elliott's a busy bee these days and had to sit this one out, so Dan took the rare opportunity of being able to finish his sentences to get to... know his old pal Stuart a little better... but with a film-related twist.We’re in season 2 of FlopTV! Tune in for individual episodes, or get a price break with a season pass! Full line-up/tickets here! And while you’re clicking on stuff, subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets!”Save on the perfect gift by visiting AuraFrames.com to get $35-off Aura’s best-selling Carver Mat frames by using promo code FLOP at checkout.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, Floppers. Before we start this episode, I just wanted to remind you we are in the middle of FlopTV Season 2. That's right, the one-hour internet televised Flophouse TV show is here for you the first Saturday of every month through February. Just go to theflophouse.simpleTix.com and get your tickets or season pass for this all-new Flophouse TV stuff. For covering movies we've never covered before, we've got video segments, it's amazing. Just go to theflophouse.simpleTix.com for FlopTV Season 2. This time, it's personal. Hey everyone and welcome to a Flophouse Mini. Of course, as you know, normally this is a podcast where we watch a bad movie
Starting point is 00:00:45 and then we talk about it. But on the weeks in between those weeks, we just kind of do whatever in these Flophouse Minis. Now for this one, Ellie couldn't be here. What? Has some important business on the moon or something. I don't know. I don't know what the, you know, he's got, I don't know. I don't know what the you know, he's got I don't know Some other funny some other business on them Sampling cheese He could not be here. So this is a rare occasion
Starting point is 00:01:17 it's just the two of us Oh Wow me Dan McCoy and you Stuart Wellington and Because we don't usually have this intimate one-on-one time. That's true, yeah. I thought what better time to get to know my old friend Stuart. Oh wow. In a segment I call Getting to Know Stu,
Starting point is 00:01:36 Getting to Know All About Stu. Because normally when we spend time together, it's usually at a movie and we're not allowed to talk. Yeah, or it's afterwards where we're mostly talking about the movie we saw. That's true, yeah, yeah. Describing a lot of male friendships here. It's funny though, because it's funny you bring up movies
Starting point is 00:01:59 because this is primarily a movie podcast, although. That's true. Although I'm getting to know you with some questions questions all the questions I'm going to ask you today actually are famous movie quotes that are questions Wow okay little extra wrinkles so to begin and this a getting to know you segment getting to know Stu second. Yeah, getting to know Stu. Stuart, you talking to me? You talking to me? Yeah, I mean, there's no one else here, so I must be talking to you. There's two microphones, one for each of us.
Starting point is 00:02:38 Yep, that's who I'm talking to. I'm talking to Dan McCoy, everybody. And you, the listeners. Thank you for identifying me Second question I'd like to ask you What's up doc? That's I mean I've been thinking about that a lot damn what's up doc the thing is that it's weird because I don't think I've ever asked an actual doctor that question. And I feel like that's the sort of thing that like they probably get asked all the time.
Starting point is 00:03:14 Like everybody, like whenever the doctor comes into the waiting room or the examination room, how many dads are like,'s up doc yeah I mean certainly if a dad has a child who becomes a doctor that's a gold mine oh my god yeah that I mean not only do they get all the the bragging rights at their I don't know fantasy baseball and that's a game yep a lot of these are elderly yeah yeah a lot of these are elderly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah a lot of what baby boomer parents are Are playing canasta until they're until their hearts collapse under a weight of I don't know red meat and a Lifetime of cognac and red meat consumption. Yeah. Well, I mean, I'm not sure we got an answer to what's up, Doc But we can we did our best. Yeah move along. Okay, well, I got another question for you, Stuart.
Starting point is 00:04:07 Why so serious? I mean, that's a good question. I mean, Dan, have you been paying attention to the news lately? I've actually been trying not to. Actively not to, yeah. That's arguably the healthier option right now. Shutting down. I would also say part of the reason why I'm so serious
Starting point is 00:04:26 is because I'm the eldest of two sons. I'm the more responsible of two brothers. I was a soccer goalkeeper. That was the position and I played a fairly high level up until college. You're saying that's a position of responsibility. It's a position of responsibility because I'm responsible if the other team scores
Starting point is 00:04:47 No matter what I still feel like it was my fault. Yeah, so to give you so I've always been one to Volunteer and take responsibility for things and then feel bad about things Do you think you've internalized that sort of soccer goalkeeper mentality Uh-huh like like it's almost like life is Life is the ball and I'm trying to keep life from wait now Wait, let me tell you that something bad is the ball and life is the net the goal I'm not sure about that because I heard that life is like a box of chocolates Oh, and I don't think it can be two things. Is that one of your later questions or is that?
Starting point is 00:05:26 Quotable I don't think it can be two things. Is that one of your later questions? Or is that just a quotable you've put out of thin air? It's not a quotable. I've noted it and I quoted it. Yeah. Okay, well that's good to know. Here's an actual incisive question here. If you work for a living, why do you kill yourself working? Oh man, what movie is that from? That's from The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. Why do you kill yourself working? Oh, man. What movies is that from?
Starting point is 00:05:45 That's from the good, the bad, and the ugly. Oh, that's... I assumed it was like Empire Records or some shit. Oh, so... You work for a living. Why do you kill yourself working? You work for a living? Why do you kill yourself working?
Starting point is 00:06:01 Oh, I think the emphasis really helped on that one. Thank you. And the facial expression. I would say for me, me, Stuart, why if I work for a living, the thing is that I am in the rarefied position to get to do kind of the job that I want and be my own boss, which not a lot of people are lucky enough to do. And so at least if I'm killing myself working, I'm like working, doing a job
Starting point is 00:06:29 that I like or jobs that I like for the most part, um, and it's, and it's for myself, so at least like, I don't know, like I'm not working to enrich someone else. Yeah. And now I don't want to depress anyone. You know, this is Admittedly, it's a good idea this premise but it can get a little thin so I will ask a few follow-up questions that are not a That are not actually movie. I mean if they if all your follow-up questions were movie quotes, I would be fucking very impressed Yeah, do you find you like that you do a thing that you I mean like obviously it's better you do a thing that you,
Starting point is 00:07:05 I mean, obviously it's better to do a thing that you enjoy than to not do a thing you enjoy. But on the other hand, I have found that one problem with doing something you love is you slowly stop loving the thing that you're doing because it's work. I mean, that's a good point. I try to keep a couple of things, a couple of my hobbies somewhat separate. But the big thing is that I know that no matter what,
Starting point is 00:07:33 I have a tendency to take the job I have seriously. And I would, as I said before, I am likely to volunteer for responsibility. And that with that responsibility comes like taking your work home with you And I feel like if it wasn't if I was doing something that I didn't like I would be taking a shitty thing home with me Yeah And I would be stressed out about it all the time For no good reason at least when I'm stressed out about things I can be like well
Starting point is 00:08:03 I'm stressed out for a good reason. No, it's true of the choices. It's it's better. I think I There's part of me that the longer I do stuff like this I forget how miserable I was doing other stuff and I romanticize the idea of like well What if I had a job I didn't have to care about? Yeah, I mean, I think that's the thing right like it's similar to like the Like thinking back like, oh man, I wish I could go back to a time where I had more time to like hang out with my buddies and play role playing games all night. But the thing is that I didn't have any responsibilities then. And I like having those. I like having things.
Starting point is 00:08:39 I like having people to rely on me. I like having, you know, I like feeling like I'm supporting people, like, and that I'm helping people. Yeah, so that's, and that's the thing is, Dan, we do make jokes about the fact that you won't enjoy a job that you hate, and you also won't, you'll be sad when you get a job you love. Yeah. Here's a question for you, and maybe this doesn't apply, but...
Starting point is 00:09:06 It's a subtitle for this whole episode. Maybe this doesn't apply, but have you checked the children? I mean, I'm pretty hip, although I feel like I'm reaching the stage where I don't buy check the children you mean, am I staying up with your younger generation? Let's say that because, you know, there's no, no children and no intention to breed or bring children into this dying planet. Not to get too heavy. But the younger generation, I mean, I was a little bit, this recent election was a little bit of a wake up call.
Starting point is 00:09:51 I didn't quite realize how generally conservative or how there is a conservative streak amongst the younger generation. I feel like... There's a lot of media out there designed to radicalize people, I think that's I think you're right. You're correct. I'm not trying to I think there's I think I had this like weird optimism
Starting point is 00:10:12 that that like everybody younger than me is going to be like pushing trying to push for a better world as opposed to not but but have I don't know, I think more and more I hear music and I'm like, who the fuck is this? Why am I supposed to know who this famous person is? Why is this person famous? I was going to bring this up because I thought it was very funny recently how like the degree to which you seemed angry, not at the person at all, but like angry like at the world of like, wait, am I supposed to know who Chappell Rhone is? The thing is, as Audrey and I told you,
Starting point is 00:10:49 she became famous extremely fast. She became famous literally within the course of her tour and then had problems dealing with it that I respect. But it was very funny to me. I'm like, oh, oh, oh, Stuart's hitting it. He's getting old. The part of it well, oh, oh, oh, Stewart's Stewart's hitting it. I'm hitting the old thing. The part of it is, I think part of it is that a lot of the time, like it's because a lot of the way that I encounter these things,
Starting point is 00:11:13 a lot of the way that the information gets to me is through a platform like Twitter. So I mean, I'm I'm seeing the like Stan culture and there's a, uh, I feel like there's a, I feel like there's a disconnect in my brain because all of a sudden the only thing I'm hearing about a person are people who are huge, like wild fans of them. And I'm like, oh wow, this must be something,
Starting point is 00:11:39 this must be like a cultural force that I could never even comprehend. And then when I experienced them, like, oh, yeah, that's it's a pop star. That's cool. Yeah. Like. I'm no real critical complaint here. I'm just like, and yeah, a lot of times it feels like it's things that are are happening very fast. Also, or like I just saw the ad for like the country music awards
Starting point is 00:12:01 and I'm just hearing names and I'm like, I've heard of none of the people. Now that's it's it's almost like a fucking bit for me at this point where I'm like and that's not a critique of them It's a critique. I'm like Wow, I've heard none of these names this all this all these all could be made up. This all could be a joke I mean like this is this is sort of topical to the the month we're recording in in November, but it's This is sort of topical to the month we're recording in, November, but it's a fun thing that I think happens for me every year with the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, where I'm like, when they list the names up top,
Starting point is 00:12:33 I'm like, okay, do I not know these because they're like, so new and hot, or do I not know these because these are the people, the weird grab bag of people that the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade gets. Like some of whom... It's Snoopy, Dan. You know who Snoopy is. Oh, you mean Joe Cool? Yeah. Whoa. They let Joe Cool be in the parade?
Starting point is 00:12:53 I know. Let's see. OK, well, here's a question for you. OK, yeah, yeah. What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss? Oh, that's actually... Oh, that's actually man. That's actually a question I'm going to have to look at. Um, I feel like I don't keep records. I do.
Starting point is 00:13:10 Yeah. I have a little binder. Um, I I'm trying to think if I, I've never been much of a gambler. Have you been a gambler? Do you? Uh, no, I find it, uh, stressful and upsetting the idea of, of, of No, I find it stressful and upsetting the idea of doing, I mean, if I did win, I know that I would probably then become too into it and lose more than I want.
Starting point is 00:13:39 The only gambling I've ever done is there've been a couple times I've been to Vegas and I did what like people said which is like Set aside like this is a certain amount that you were absolutely willing to lose and you know that it's just a tax You're paying to the idea of doing some gambling while you're in Vegas and then stop and you know, it's not Yeah, but what about what about those NFTs you invested in? Well those Stuart that's not a that's not a gamble Those are good. Just like yeah, and you're more of an art collector Yeah, I feel like I When it comes to I feel first off I have to say like of all the addictions out there
Starting point is 00:14:14 I feel like for some reason I find like gambling addictions to be the worst Well, I mean, it's it's certainly one of the quicker ways to ruin your I I mean, like alcoholism obviously is bad, but it'll take a while. You know, whereas gambling... And what a ride. ...very quickly. Yeah, it's not one that I've... There's like upsides to other addictions that I don't quite understand with gambling. Yeah, I mean, I guess maybe I just haven't gotten the rush, you know?
Starting point is 00:14:44 Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I guess maybe I just haven't gotten the rush. You know, when it comes to gambling, I like the activity based stuff, but I'm not a I wouldn't. I don't know if like I wouldn't. I'm not a like a card, not really a card player unless it's got like fantasy characters on the cards. I'm not a slot machine person. I like craps because it's like an activity where everybody's standing around the table shouting. You probably wouldn't bet on a coin toss because it lacks a certain verve as a game.
Starting point is 00:15:15 That's true. Again, unless those coins look really cool or they have characters involved. But that's like a JoJo's Bizarre Adventure type character. Well, here's a good question for you, Stuart. Yeah, please. Let's really dig into it. Fire away.
Starting point is 00:15:29 Dig into the deep stuff. I wanna ask you, who are you gonna call? I mean, on Sundays I call my parents. Setting up a weekly phone call with them has been very good for the structure of our relationship Outside of that not a lot of people. I don't like to make phone calls. I feel like that's Do you remember like when I was what like a teenager? Up through what like 20 or so I would just I guess a definition of teenager I like I would call my friends all the fucking time
Starting point is 00:16:03 Yeah, and now if one of my friends all the fucking time. And now if one of my friends called me, I'm like, who died? Yeah, other than my parents, I would say that the last time I spent a long time on a phone call with anyone, and I'm going to sound very old because I'm going to use the word courting, was when Audrey and I were recording. Yeah. Like, you know, I was away during Christmas back home. We had just gotten together. That was the last time there was an extended phone call to anyone who was not my folks, I think.
Starting point is 00:16:36 Yeah. Unless you count like Zoom calls for the podcast, which yeah, I don't. I mean, I guess this podcast is kind of a phone call to all of you listeners. Yeah, I guess. One side is it's more like you have like the wires have crossed and you're listening in on someone else's phone call. Like a frequency situation. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:56 Yeah. Well, here's a question for you. And, you know, I'm a little concerned. Sure. What is your major malfunction? Numb nuts? Oh yeah. Well, that's fair.
Starting point is 00:17:08 I mean, num nuts, that's a classic put down and it's one that I, it's a title that I wear with a certain fatalistic pride. Keep your nuts really numb. I keep them numb. It's because my underpants are too constricting and it cuts off the circulation. So what is my major malfunction?
Starting point is 00:17:27 Let's see. I just like, I would say my major malfunction is that I just care too much. Okay. I mean, you've got the job story. You're already my co-host. You don't need to. Oh yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:17:41 Yeah, that, yeah, I'm just like, I just like, I take my work home with me and like like it's too cool. Yeah, I'm too cool. Like I'm too professional sometimes Mm-hmm. All right. All right. Well, maybe we'll revisit that in the future Just one more question before we take a brief break, of course, and that question is what's in the box? What's in the box? What's in the box? I would say hope. Oh, the thing with feathers. All right, well, we're going to take a little break for sponsors for some Flophouse business and we'll be right back.
Starting point is 00:18:27 All right, we're over 70 episodes into our show. Let's learn everything. So let's do a quick progress check. Have we learned about quantum physics? Yes, episode 59. We haven't learned about the history of gossip yet, have we? Yes, we have. Same episode, actually. Have we talked to Tom Scott about his love of roller coasters?
Starting point is 00:18:42 Episode 64. So how close are we to learning everything? Bad news, we still haven't learned everything yet. Oh, we're ruined! No, no, no, it's good news as well. There is still a lot to learn. Woo! I'm Dr. Ella Hubba.
Starting point is 00:18:58 I'm regular Tom Lum. I'm Caroline Boper, and on Let's Learn Everything, we learn about science and a bit of everything else too. And although we haven't learned everything yet, I've got a pretty good feeling about this next episode. Join us every other Thursday on Maximum Fun. People say not to judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree. Which is why here on Just the Zoo of Us, we judge them by so much more.
Starting point is 00:19:21 We rate animals out of 10 in the categories of effectiveness, ingenuity, and aesthetics, taking into consideration each animal's true strengths, like a pigeon's ability to tell a Monet from a Picasso or a polar bear's ability to play basketball. Guest experts like biologists, ecologists, and more join us to share their unique insight into the animal's world. Listen with friends and family of all ages on MaximumFun.org or wherever you get podcasts. The Flophouse is sponsored in part by Aura Frames. Let's be honest. What most people really want from the holidays
Starting point is 00:20:02 is to see their favorite people more often. Fah! Fah! On these commercial goods they say, my favorite people more often. That's why this year the best gift you can give, besides playing tickets, is an Aura digital picture frame, which was named the number one digital photo frame by Wirecutter, which in a range list is the finest ranking. Aura frames are incredibly smart and easy to use, allowing you to upload unlimited photos and videos directly from your phone to the frame. Plus, you can order the frame online
Starting point is 00:20:39 and preload it with photos and videos using the Aura app, so it's ready to go right out of the box. You know, my family has a text chain, actually it's a messenger chain. I sent them a lot of photos of our, what do you call it, a vacation. That's what we did. We had a little vacation. I sent my parents photos on there because I know that they don't check Instagram and they were delighted to see them,
Starting point is 00:21:07 but are they gonna go back and check those photos again to see their loved ones having fun out there in the world? No, but if you put them in an Aura digital frame, then they're there, they'll pop up, they'll look over, they'll smile. It's the perfect way to share your life with family when you're away from your family. So save on the perfect gift by visiting AuraFrames.com to get $35 off. Aura is a best selling
Starting point is 00:21:33 Carver Mat Frames by using promo code FLOP. This deal is exclusive to listeners, so get yours now in time for the holidays. Terms and conditions apply. And now, some FLOP House specific plugs. We're gonna be back in San Francisco for San Francisco SketchFest in January, which is gonna be just a little more than a month away as you hear this.
Starting point is 00:22:07 We'll be there on Sunday, January 19, 2025, performing at Cobb's Comedy Club at 7 p.m. And breaking news, we've decided on the film, we'll be discussing Cutthroat Island, the legendary flop that killed pirate movies until Pirates of the Caribbean briefly revived them before killing them again, brutally. So if you want tickets to see us, do our usual hilarious presentations.
Starting point is 00:22:35 Hilarious, hilarious guys, hilarious. It's right here in what I wrote down, so it must be true. The presentations are hilarious. And talk about Cutthroat Island, go to sfsketchfest.com for tickets. And meanwhile, if you don't like leaving the comfort of your home, you can still see us quote unquote live on FlopTV.
Starting point is 00:23:00 The next live stream will be on January the 4th when we discuss Ski School 2 at 6pm Pacific, 9 Eastern, appropriate for the season. Winter, we'll be talking skiing, the bane of my knee. Tickets at theflophouse.simpletix.com, but season pass holders can watch all of the previous shows on demand until the end of February. The most recent one we did was about Highlander 2. We had some tech issues live, but those have been edited out of the replay for smooth viewing. Apologies to those who were alive.
Starting point is 00:23:38 Thanks for sticking with us to see the unhinged special report that I contributed. Tickets again at theflophouse.simpletakes.com where they are $7 per show or get a season pass with a price break, pay only $35 for all six shows. And one last thing, while I've got you, please go to flophousepodcast.com to sign up for our newsletter, Flop Secrets, which is the best way to keep up on all of our appearances and projects and to get extra content that's just for fun. In the most recent one, I gave my plane report.
Starting point is 00:24:16 It has become established Flophouse lore thanks to the ribbing of my co-hosts that my favorite way to watch movies is on a plane. And thus, in honor of that, I was on a plane recently. I thought it would be fun to give a full rundown and review of the media I consumed. And that is the sort of useless, hopefully mildly amusing nonsense you can get in the Flop Secrets newsletter along with useful nonsense about our projects. So again, go to Flophousepodcast.com, plug your email into the field that says newsletter and enjoy getting something extra delivered to your inbox twice a month.
Starting point is 00:24:53 Now back to my intimate one-on-one with Stuart Wellington. And we're back. We're of course getting to know Stu. That's me. Getting to know all about Stu. Still me. With some movie based questions. Sure.
Starting point is 00:25:10 Some icebreakers cold from the movies and here's a question. This is a real homicides the box episode. Oh that's what's in the box. Yeah. Okay. Here's a question for you. me by my size. Do you That's true. I mean, I don't think that's true. Damn. I don't judge you by your size. I I like I like your size. Okay, I guess that's a judgment. I
Starting point is 00:25:43 So no, I would say no I don't and in fact, I Am disappointed that you would suggest that I would not even because I don't lift You don't judge judge me by my size. No, not everyone not everyone lives. It's not the life for everybody That's not it's lifting weights is an activity that I like it is a activity that also messes with my body dysmorphia because as I get bigger in the chest and shoulders, shirts don't fit and I'm like,
Starting point is 00:26:14 oh no, am I gaining weight? Or when I had to change my style of pants because my thighs had gotten too big from squatting and dead lifting. But, you know, so no, I don't touch people by their size. I mean, look, I know it's a psychological issue. I can't just tell you not to do that, but. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:26:33 But don't worry about it, man. This is, here's a question. Oh wait, I just should not worry about it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I fixed it. Oh wow, yeah, I never considered it. I could just stop worrying about it It's an expression of concern and affection. Here's here's a question for you and It's a it's got a there's a corollary question. Here's it first off. Uh-huh
Starting point is 00:26:59 You want the truth? Here's a corollary Follow-up you think you can handle the truth. Well, that's I think that's ultimately the thing I Can I guess I you know what I think I can handle the truth and I sometimes avoid it because you know, it's It's not always easy to deal with harsh realities sometimes, certainly these days.
Starting point is 00:27:28 But I feel like everyone can kind of handle the truth despite that. Like I feel like as much as we might want to avoid it or certainly might want to soften things when talking to somebody, I think we have a tendency to underestimate people's ability to handle difficult information. They can handle it. I would say that people are built a lot of the times, unfortunately, to try and avoid the truth. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:58 But I think that here's a bit of vaguely Eastern philosophy. Sure, okay, you learned this in yoga. Here's a bit of a vaguely Eastern philosophy. Sure, okay, you learned this at yoga. I think pain is caused by struggle. I think it's better to accept the truth, to steer into the truth, than to try and push it away, because it's always gonna cause more trouble.
Starting point is 00:28:20 Yeah, that's a good point. Here's a question. Okay. What? Oh man, I got the Quizzler on my hands. Yeah, that's a good point. Here's a question. Okay. What? Oh man, I got the Quizzler on my hands. Here's a question. What is it that gives me joy?
Starting point is 00:28:32 What is it that gives you joy? I would say... some routine. I would say... space to practice things that you are good at. I would say space to practice things that you are good at. I would say people who support you and make an effort to show you that you're meaningful to them. Yeah, I think that's a good start.
Starting point is 00:29:01 Stuart, this is a really dumb, thin idea that I came up with, and yet, you're gonna make me cry. Cause I'm like, you know what, that's pretty incisive. Did a good job. Oh, bless ya. Here's a question. Who's the fairest one of all? I mean, yeah, I mean, it's probably me.
Starting point is 00:29:29 Oh, wow. I mean, I'm the one with the most in-depth skincare routine, I think. Or. And I have, you know, that's, and you know, I spend a lot of money on my hair. You know, I'm staring at this question. I'm like thinking about the like,
Starting point is 00:29:48 the upsetting sort of racial implications of Snow White. Yes, yes. Snow White, and she's the fairest one of all. She's not the prettiest one of all. Yeah. It is the fairness of her skin. Yeah. That's terrible.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Yeah, that's true. Upsetting. Yeah, and my skin is fair because I I sleep during the day and go out at night as a bartender and what's fair is foul and foul is fair Wow, you got me there Dan. I got me. This ain't your old school. Okay, lock me up Here's here's an important question Mm-hmm, you know, yeah, you you know it's important because it starts Archie's Archie's rubbing his face all over your empty kind bar
Starting point is 00:30:32 Yeah, he's like eight grams of protein. I'll be the judge of that Here's a you know, this is an important question because it starts with a plea to ask yourself a question Yep, do I feel lucky? We'll do you punk. Well, I, I don't like being called a punk. Do I feel lucky? I mean, yeah, I do feel lucky. I, you know, I have a lot of people in my life that love me and I feel supported and I get to do the job that I like to do. And I'm lucky enough to have an audience. Uh, some of whom have already turned off this episode, but that's fine. They're Elliott fans. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:14 Uh, they're like, I want to hear movies. I don't want to hear this guy talk about his life. Um, uh, but, uh, yeah, I, I feel lucky and, uh, you know what? I can handle being called a punk now and then. All right. So here's the next one is, could you describe the ruckus, sir? Yeah, I mean, let's see.
Starting point is 00:31:40 How would I describe? How would you describe the ruckus? Well, there would be hootin' and hollerin', of course. There would be pots clangin'. There would be glass breaking. Maybe chains rattling. Ooh, spooky. Floorboards creakin'.
Starting point is 00:32:04 Let's see, how else would I describe it? Wind whistling. Are you sure this isn't just a Halloween sound effects LP you're describing? A witch cackling. Okay, bubbling brew. Oh yeah, that's the craziest scary sound. Ooh, what's cooking?
Starting point is 00:32:23 Is it me? My fucking tea's ready? This question is sort of a biological query. Okay, yeah. Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? That's actually a really good question. What happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? I'd imagine something very unique and different
Starting point is 00:32:49 than when something else gets struck by lightning. But I don't remember the exact answer. Maybe we'll have to turn on, what is that, X-Men? After X-Storm for that one? X-Men, you know, I read that apparently that was supposed to be, among other things, like there's been some talk of like, well, did you deliver it the best way for like that kind of, but among other things,
Starting point is 00:33:14 apparently it was supposed to be the end of a runner of like Toad was supposed to say a bunch of stuff, like, you know what happens when a Toad does this? And then that was like the punchline. And then all the setups got cut. No, that's too bad. Was Ray, what is it, Ray Park? Ray Park.
Starting point is 00:33:31 I don't think he has any lines in that movie, huh? Maybe. I can't remember. I don't remember the first X-Men well. They didn't get Peter Zerf and the Wits to dub in all those lines. Here's a question that's actually, you know, this is sort of interesting because it's... I think I've seen it since back in the day. They didn't get Peter Zerf and the Wits to dub in all of the lines. Here's a question that's actually, you know, this is sort of interesting because it's a... Wait, when do you hear that news? Is there like a X-Men newsletter?
Starting point is 00:33:53 Yeah, I have a Google alert for Toad and Lightning. No, I, you know, in the course... Was that like one of those like grocery store aisle like memorial issue X-Men the movie movie all the facts were they not speak to the veracity or the opposite of this Factoid like this. This is a factoid in the original sense of the word Which is the facts that may or may not be true like Yeah listeners right in tell us if this is true
Starting point is 00:34:20 I in the in the course of looking around for questions for this episode. I came across that so This question is actually interesting because it's phrased in the negative. No interesting. Okay, are you not entertained No, I'm enjoying this process I think this works wait, I think that's I'm waiting my did I double negative it? Because I am I am in taking you for Scientology That actually would yeah, that would make that would be amazing. Yeah, I mean Yeah, go back and change all those Okay, so you are entertained that's good. Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah, I'm into it. Okay, so you are entertained. That's good to... Yeah, yeah, I'm into it.
Starting point is 00:35:05 Okay, well I do have one final question before we close up the old movie question bag. And that is, I'm funny how? Funny like a clown, I amuse you, I make you laugh, I'm here to fucking amuse you. Yeah, so I would say you're not funny like a clown, I amuse you, I make you laugh, I'm here to fucking amuse you. Yeah, so I would say you're not funny like a clown. Certainly not in the traditional sense. I haven't seen you do any Pratt Falls or any, a lot.
Starting point is 00:35:35 Mine. You don't do a lot of sight gags. Although you can do some pretty solid reactions. I mean, I think, Dan, you amuse me as all the great straight men do. You set yourself up to be made fun of. You get upset when people then call you out on things. You have big reactions,
Starting point is 00:36:00 which is why it's fun to get you wound up. And yeah, so that's what that's what amuses me that you you have enough quirks that you are a genuine character, but you you also seem like a somewhat serious guy, if that makes sense. Yeah. No, I appreciate the assessment. It's good to hear something about strengths. I mean, it's not necessarily like areas of improvement. I don't need to hear that.
Starting point is 00:36:28 No, if you want, I can give you a shit sandwich. I don't care to. I gave former host of the podcast, this is Stuart setting himself up to get hate mail. But years ago, former host of the podcast, Simon Fischer, worked for me when I worked at a hobby store. I was a much younger man back then. And we had to do an employee review
Starting point is 00:36:52 and we had to do a, you know, like, I was trained to do like a shit sandwich style review. And we were, he filled out his form and we were kind of going over it together and he was taking it very seriously, which I found to be incredibly funny. And it was like, we talked about his strengths and he was a very good employee. And then when it came to, I'm like, okay, so let's talk about areas of improvement.
Starting point is 00:37:14 And I could see him like racking his brain, like really thinking about it. And I'm like, how about baldness? Because he had been like losing his hair and nobody had said anything. And I think I was the first person to make a joke about it. And he got so offended. Uh, I mean, it is inappropriate for a work relationship. Yes. I mean, we were friends before we were, I mean, in no way am I defending myself.
Starting point is 00:37:37 I'm the villain in this story, but it was very, to this day, I'm still like, man, that was a good, that was a good, mean joke I made. To this day, I'm still like, man, that was a good, that was a good, mean joke I made. It was so mean, in fact, that like, friends from home called me up the next day to like, lambast me for like, making that joke. Which I deserve. Well, I hope this has been an enjoyable episode for,
Starting point is 00:38:02 I don't know, those of you out there who are like mean to Elliot on the internet for some reason, but I hope that the people who love Elliot, you know, forgave this episode. I mean, and people, yeah, people who love Elliot, if anything, will listen to this episode and be like, yeah, yeah, that's why they have an Elliot. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:38:22 Yeah, but in the meantime, we've I think gotten a lot of good data. I'll feed this into the computer. AI algorithm sucked all this up. Eventually we'll be able to simulate a Stuart. Easy. We enjoyed for future generations. But until that time comes, I'd like to thank Alex Smith, our producer.
Starting point is 00:38:43 He goes by the name Howell Dottie on the internet. He has his work cut out for him to like maybe zazz up this episode a little bit. Yeah, he's going to do a lot of farts and zinger sound effects. Yeah, some boyoings. Get that soundboard out. And I'd like to thank our podcast network, Maximum Fun. If you go to MaximumFun.org, you can listen to a lot of great shows.
Starting point is 00:39:04 They have them there. You can check them out. If you like the show, you'll probably like something else. Yeah, you like podcast. You like stuff. Uh-huh, but until next time, I've been Dan McCoy. And I've been Stuart Wellington. Bye.
Starting point is 00:39:18 Bye. ["Maximum Fun Theme"] Maximum Fun. A worker-owned network of artist-owned shows supported directly by you.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.