The Flop House - FH Mini 125 - Cinematic Mechanics

Episode Date: April 5, 2025

Elliott puts on his greasy overalls to look under the filmic hood, as we figure out what makes a good "robot movie," ask why Heartbeeps was a bad one, and see if we can pull out the robot defibrillator to restore its cinematic heartbeep.Subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets!”Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, go to www.squarespace.com/FLOP to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Welcome one and all to another episode of the Flophouse. Specifically this week, it's a Flophouse Mini. What is a Flophouse Mini? Well, I'm so glad you asked. A Flophouse Maxi, you might say, is when we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it. A Flophouse Maxi pad is, you know, just for that time of the day. And Flophouse Mini is-

Didn't need to do that. And flop house minis are when we take a little time to talk about. Click, drag and drop, delete. When we take some time to do whatever we want. So we didn't watch a specific movie for this episode, but we're going to have a specific talk about a specific thing. And today it's another episode of everyone's favorite

flop house mini that is being introduced this time. It's another episode of everyone's favorite Flophouse Mini that is being introduced this time. It's another episode of Cinematic Mechanic. That's right, Cinematic Mechanic, the Flophouse Mini, where we take a movie that maybe has machines in it, and we get under the hood of this lemon and tinker with it to make it into a movie that maybe, just maybe would work. Today, we're in the middle of an unofficial theme stretch. Obviously, our Max Fun Drive ended.

Thank you so much, everybody everybody for the pledges you made during Max Fun Drive. We really appreciate it. It's gonna keep the podcast going. It means we can put the time and the effort and the energy into it that we really want to. And it means that we're gonna keep going into your ears and then into your brain and then to your memories

for hopefully, for another year at least and hopefully many years to come after that. So first I wanna say thank you very much for your pledges during MaxFunDrive. If you didn't pledge, you can still go to maximumfun.org slash join. You can still join when it's not the drive, you know, please do, why not?

Anyway, we had our run of movies without Spider-Man in them, which ended with heart beeps. That was last week. Next week, we're gonna be watching the electric state. So we kind of segued into a robots theme month, this kind of secret theme month of robots. And I wanna talk about robot movies. Having just watched Heart Beeps,

I wanna say let's get into Heart Beeps and cinematic mechanic that thing as we do every time we become cinematic mechanics and make this a good movie about robots. So Dan, Stu, the first thing I wanna talk about is what makes a good movie about robots. So Dan, Stu, the first thing I want to talk about is what makes a good movie robot? Like what is a good robot for movies? But also what's a good robot movie?

Because those are not the same things, you know? A robot movie and a movie robot, the best movie robots are not necessarily in the best robot movies. Because let's talk about it. What do you think are the best robot movies? By which I mean the best movies with robots in them. Not Robot in the Family.

Not Robot in the Family, which is surprisingly like Heartbeats, and I feel like we should have compared the two, as they're both about kind of goldish colored robots that have incredibly annoying voices. So there's like, there's, you know, organic material covering the Terminator frame, but the Terminators are essentially robots, right?

Without the flesh on them, they're basically robots, yeah. Yeah, so I'd go with those are some great robot movies. I am a big lover of AI, even though some people don't like it quite as much. Dan making a controversial statement. He loves AI. He wants it to replace real writers. Not the actual thing in the world today.

He just thinks it's better than normal art. The Spielberg movie. You mean AI colon artificial intelligence. We have to call it that, yeah. Some other ones, Heart Beeps tries and fails to do what Wally did very well. Wally's robot movie. Top robot movie.

Ex Machina, another great movie about robots in love. I'm gonna say okay movie. I like it better than Stuart. The dance scene is really great. There's I would say the iron giant is a great robot movie That's about a different kind of love between friends, you know, then you've got but then you've got your movies like batteries not included Me about this shit guys batteries not that They think he's a burger. He's on the whole thing and they think he's a burger. The robots are cute.

One day, Stuart, I want you to do a presentation about best almost burgers in movies. Did you ever do that? You know what this leads into? The battery's not a good robot. Everybody wants some. Stuart's thinking about burgers, yeah. This is gonna lead into, I think, the second category

where I will argue that the short circuit movies aren't necessarily great Robot movies, but they have a great robot in them. That's what I want to talk about so because there are some movies that are also great movies that have a robot in them That I don't consider robot movies movies like the day the earth stood still has a great robot in it Don't consider that a robot movie Wizard of Oz the tin man's basically a robot right? Forbidden planet? The forbidden. That's got a great robot. I think we can all agree the robot and interstellar is incredible.

Yes. Whereas they don't love that movie. And as Rocky IV, of course, is the combination of both, it's a great movie with a great robot in it. It's not a great robot movie. No, it's not a great robot movie. Exactly. So what makes a great movie, what is the difference between a great movie with a robot in it? Wouldn't it have been crazy if in the end like in the final like bout in Rocky 4

He like Rocky's losing and he looks over and the little robots there and he's like you can do it And he's like I can do it Here's what you say Dan because then I'm gonna try to answer the question you're asking. Well like what makes a movie a great robot movie as opposed to a movie with a great movie with a robot in it? Like a robot movie. Metropolis I consider not necessarily a robot movie even though the robot plays a big part in the play.

Right. I think a robot movie always has a touch of the Pinocchio in there. It's about the like what makes a human. Where did Pinocchio touch you, Dan? Can you show me on the stall? Well, he lied nose. Yeah, like shut out and I don't think it was purposeful. Sure. Sure. Yeah, of course not It's telling a lie is a choice Dan

No, but I think that there's a bit of like the like what what makes one human What is what is sentience like that is always like part of like the movies that are robot movies like chopping all like like Artificial intelligence like short-circuit like heartbeats Like yeah chopping ball is kind of the best of both worlds, isn't it? I mean, terminator design is possibly the best soundtrack a little bit about that. Well, so actually, Dan, that's a good segue into our segment right now. It's called D. Botters.

This is the debate segment about robots. And this this segment is so the issue is Robocop, a robot movie. Now, I'm going to put you guys on either side of this. Dan Stewart, you're going to debate this issue with each other and for points that will mean nothing. And so, Dan, I'm gonna give you first choice because you're so fired up about this already. You get to choose, is Robocop a robot movie or not?

And you'll have to argue that side. I'm going to argue it is not a robot movie. So Stuart, you're gonna have to argue that Robocop is a robot movie, okay. And Stuart, because you didn't get to choose your side, you get to take the floor, you had less time to think about it. So now you get the opening statement.

So Stuart, is Robocop a robot movie? You are answering, Resolved Robocop is a robot movie. I believe that Robocop is a robot movie because it focuses on Alex Murphy, a human man inside who has a computer tied in with his brain. And it's, we see the differences between when he is controlled by that computer and

when Dan no interruptions. Dan's face is incredulous. All those from the first moment. Dan is forming in his seats like I'm turning on the vibrating beads up his butt. I'm just reacting. The tingler is underneath Dan right now, yeah. And we also get to see the difference between Robocop and a full-on robot, ED-209, and we can see the differences.

ED-209 for full. And we can see the essential element in something that requires nuance, requires a human touch, whereas something like ED-209 is just a unstoppable, unfeeling killing machine. So in that way, I believe it is a, I'm not saying the Robocop is a robot,

I'm saying it is a robot movie. Oh, wow, that strong argument. Dan, what's your rebuttal? Or rebuttal, I should say. Yeah, I was incredulous from the beginning because Stuart chose to start his argument out with, it's about a human, Alex Murphy. You're kidding me?

And that's the central argument I make. It is about a human, Alex Murphy. The last lines of the film are, what's your name, son? Murphy. He doesn't say my name is RoboCop because he isn't a robot cop. He is a man inside a robo suit and it is about knowing his humanity.

A robot suit, Dan. This is when the judges can come in and just point out, maybe I'm doing Suits for Work for him, but the original tagline for the movie is part human, part robot, all cop. So- Part man, part robot. Well, there you go, he's all cop, he's only part robot. Oh, okay, interesting, all right, turn around. The robot suit is essentially an, you know, an aid.

Again, I'm gonna push back, the judges are gonna push back, maybe I'm doing a search job again, on the idea suit. It's his physical body. Most of his body is robotic. It's an exoskeleton. It is, the brain is where the humanity exists and the brain is intact and the movie is a journey to him saying that his name is Murphy, his name is not Robocop.

He is Murphy, he is a man. There is a robot in the film, as Stuart indicates, Ed 209, but that is a supporting robot. That is not the primary character and the primary thrust of the film. Okay, now closing statements for both of you. Stuart, you go first. What's your closing statement?

I think the essential element, the essential story of RoboCop is how, what makes us human and the differences and the necessity of keeping that humanity in a world that is becoming more robotized. Yes. And Dan, your closing statement? I believe that the theme of a robot movie is what makes us human,

but it is explored through robots that become human-like. And this is a movie about rejecting the technologicalization of the man. I would argue that kind of binary thinking is a robot talk. I am a robot talk. This is the debate. The debate community has been rocked by the accusation that Dan is in fact a robot programmed to debate. Oh, he's disqualification. You know what? There's no winner. Unfortunately, this debate is being shut down. I knew I should have had you guys tested for it by having you urinate into a cup and when Dan's urine came out as motor

This is our new this is our new test the old one was really weird Questions we realized when we looked at your eye while we asked you the weird questions a weird person could just give weird answers And I might look weird, but if you pay and oil comes out You're a robot. Yeah And and Blade Runner 3002 or whatever the next one he's Deckard's like okay, just be in the cup That's Harrison Ford's getting grablier his time. Yeah, itlly, yeah. Voight-Kampf, that's what I was... Yes, it's a Voight-Kampf.

Well, because I couldn't remember it, I kept moving like, Wayland Yutani's from Alien. I was pretty desperately trying to find a way to make Voight-Kampf into a piss-related joke, but I couldn't do it, so I disobeyed and it all. It's so much easier to make into a Mein Kampf joke, which does not what we're doing right here, no. That's not a joke, Elliot. We're gonna give these replicants the Mein Kampf joke, which we don't, that's not what we're doing right here, no. That's not a joke, Elliot.

We're gonna give these replicants the Mein Kampf test. No! To tell if they're actually Nazis. That's what's happening in the world. Ich bin ein Replikant, ich bin nicht ein, you know, and so forth. So guys, let's move on to what we were talking about before. Let's go back to movie robots.

What makes, okay, so we talked about what makes a good robot movie. Dan says it is the theme of humanity and sentience. What does it mean to be a machine? What does it mean to be alive? I think that might be limiting this to human ideas of life and robotics, but again, these movies right now are made for a human audience,

so that makes sense to me. But okay, it's about what it is to be human through the medium of robots. But what makes a good movie robot? So as we mentioned, battery's not included. Stuart is still be human through the medium of robots. But what makes a good movie robot? So as we mentioned, batteries not included, Stuart is still gonna die on the hill that it is a great movie. And I will say it is a very cute robot.

It seems like there's two kinds of movie robots, right? There's the cute friendly ones, batteries not included, short circuit. BB8, R2D2. R2D2, BB8, Megan, and the scary deadly ones, chopping all this world, Megan. Megan straddles the line there. So what is it about those aspects of robots?

They're either cute and friendly or they're scary and deadly. What makes a good version of each of those in your guys' mind? What makes a good cute robot and not an annoying cute robot? Like R2D2, great cute robot. BB8, okay. That robot in Rise of Skywalker

where he's just a cone on a wheel or some shit, shitty robot. Crap, you cute robot. Scary, deadly robot. Some are really cool, some don't pull it off. What's the difference? What do you think? Well, I do think that part of this is a uncanny valley thing.

Like the cute robots. The valley the uncanny X-Men live in? The ones that are the most lovable tend to be the ones that are less human, like your R2-D2s or your batteries not included or even your interstellars. Now I'm gonna argue with that. I think you're usually right. It's funny I think that you think

Cinder the interstellar robot cute. I didn't say cute, I said you like them. Oh, you like them, true. Because in Heart Beeps, the robot they make, Phil, is I guess maybe he just looks a little too much, too attempting to be cute, because I found that robot despicable from moment one, that little kid robot.

Sure, but I don't find him as off-putting as you do Andy Kaufman robot. No, that's true.. Which is I think that if you get too human like it's frightening, you know Yeah, and that's where making it's kind of like the garbage pail kids in the garbage pail kids movie. Yeah One fine the ones that look more like humans get them out of here and in the middle you got see 3po who is irritating but lovable. Yeah. He looks kind of like a human, but not that much. I mean, he's a human shape and a human face arrangement. But it's, I mean, C-3PO, that design is pulling so much

from Maria, the robot from Metropolis, who is a cool looking robot, but is also supposed to be kind of off-putting in that way of, now what about Stuart, you can always remember his name and I can't remember, the Japanese artist who paints the sexy robots. Soriyama? Yeah, does that work for you guys?

Are you into that? Yeah. Where it's like a lady's body, but with like a bald faceless head on top. Or like her legs look like they're, I don't know, the spokes of a motorcycle or something. I mean, when I was a young pervizoid looking through the quote, quote art books

at Bead Alton Booksellers, like I was never all that into the Sorayama books there. I'm like, okay, I guess this is kind of sexy, but they're also robots, so it's not for me, but I'm not putting it down for someone. I feel like there should be a third category. There's cute, friendly, scary, deadly. There should be a category of sexy, attractive.

Because you see, and there was just an article in, I think, the New Yorker about what are we gonna do in the future when people start falling in love with robots and AI? And yet, aside from robots- The future? Yeah. No, I'm just saying that I think that that's all,

we're already down that path. They're saying we're entering that phase. So what do we do about it? But it but in movies, I feel like unless a robot is basically just a woman or Jigalo Joe from AI who's just Jude Law, like there's not a shiny but shiny. Yeah, but kind of plastic. But he looks like the Duracell battery family, you know, where they have plastic rubber scan or whatever. Yeah. Oh, baby. I love it as a human features, but it looks like it's made out of latex. There isn't a, we haven't yet figured out what is sexy for a robot without just imitating

a human form. Is that because as humans who are programmed mostly, not all of us, but most of us to reproduce with other humans, that's just what we're into. Are we gonna enter a world where people are, find that there's a new form, a robotic form that they are attracted to? Dan, what do you think? This is off topic, but.

So, it's. But it is a hot topic. Can we abstract something that is still sexy, like that does not look like humans? Yes. Yeah, like Hedonism bot in Futurama. Yeah, yeah. He was sexiest. I mean, he still looks like, kind of like a humans. Yeah, like Hedonism bot in Futurama. He was sexiest. I mean, he still looks kind of like a person. I mean, I'm sure people can get there.

People find all sorts of things sexy, God bless them. But I don't think, I don't know, I think that something has to look reasonably human for me to be into it. Okay, so let's go back to what we were talking about before, because I'm getting uncomfortable talking about Dan's particular interests. But the-

Yeah, Dan brought it up. I'll give you a pamphlet on it later. So what sort of cute friendly robot, Dan, you're saying the more kind of, the less kind of human-y, probably the shorter it looks, probably, there's a reason that probably the cutest robot in all of robots is the Gonk Droid, the power battery droid in Star Wars,

which is usually just a garbage can on legs But what what makes a good scary deadly robot a robot that looks really like it like 80 209 is a great scary-looking robot A lot of them just look like people, you know Megan Something about like something about an unfeeling uncaring face that is performing an act of violence is terrifying. Whether it is one that is a simulation of a human face or if it's just like something flat and blank. Yeah, I would either go terrifying either has to be uncanny valley, you know, like a human but as Stewart says, like a human.

Or you take advantage of the fact that a robot can be anything and you know, there's something off. Like a human. Hey! Or you take advantage of the fact that a robot can be anything, and it's like, I don't know, it's got a bunch of robo tentacles, or it looks like a big spider or something like that. What I don't find scary is sort of the like, mill ground of like, you know, we mentioned chopping mall before. It's a very fun movie, I like it.

I would be scared if robots were trying to shoot me with lasers, but the design isn't scary, because it's just like, okay, well these are like, I don't know, like big vacuum cleaners. Yeah, the ATM is chasing me. Yeah, I think that makes sense. I think, Stuart, something you've hit on reminds me of why I think the alien from Alien is such a scary design,

it's because you can't see its eyes, you know? It's like a kind of strangely human mouth with, I mean, except for that little mouth inside. I haven't met anybody yet who has one of those. But it's strangely, strangely human mouth with this, with this eyeless face. So it's not projecting emotion except aggression at any point.

Okay, so I think we figured out something. A good robot movie has to really take advantage of what it means to be a robot and what it means to be human. It can't just be a fun story with a robot in it. So for this, I would think you guys would say, Star Wars, not a robot movie necessarily, even though there's so many droids in it. And a good robot, a good movie robot,

if it's gonna be cute, can't be too human-like. And if it's gonna be scary, it has to have some aspect of a lack of human emotion, or at least an exaggeration or character of human emotion. It's less a, it's partly a design thing, but also partly a behavioral affect thing. The Terminator, although he's a cyborg technically, cause he's got flesh on him,

he's scary in Terminator, cause he shows no emotion while he's doing these things. He's walking through a police station, mowing guys down, but he's not, he's showing no reaction to any of that stuff. The terminators, when they don't have the flesh on them, they're always smiling. They look like they're having a great time,

even when they're crushing skulls and they're shooting people. Robot party. Yeah, it's a huge robot party. I feel like, did either of you guys see last year's Oscar nominated animated film, The Wild Robot? Yes, I did. Yes. How was that robot? I didn't see it, but I've heard good things.

It is, that movie is all right. I feel like it was hard for me. The movie itself is very loud. It's much, I was expecting a movie that was a little bit more meditative and a little bit more tranquil or, or, what's the word? Flow-like. Yeah, flow-like because the book is much more like that. The robot in it is okay. The design is all right. It never, I feel like it's not one of those robots

where you see it and you're like, I'm in love with this robot. And it's also not one of those robots where the, it kind of starts already with a certain amount of humanity to it. So it's all right. I feel like when talking about robot design, I feel like going to Pixar is a pretty good place for a lot of these things, whether it's WALL-E or even like the villainous robots in The Incredibles,

because they're very straightforward, but they manage to add a lot of personality to something that does not speak. It's just this like uncaring ball with tentacles that comes after our heroes. And even the other robots in Wall-E, just the side robots all feel like they have a lot of personality, even when they don't have faces

or things like that. I would say Wall-E is the best story about two robots falling in love. That's ever been told in film at least. I'm sure there's fan fiction and erotic out there that maybe does it better, but I haven't read it. So, okay, we figured out what makes a good robot movie, kind of, or at least what defines a robot movie. Wait, real quick. Dan, if you were going to have to write erotic fanfiction about two robots, what two robots would you select? Uh, I thought we didn't want to know too much about my good question. This is good. We gotta dig into my brain

uh, well You know i'd have to go to like like what robots do I think are sexy? I think would have to be or which robots do you think would have the most interesting chemistry together? Yeah Like I would say dot matrix and r2d2 just because they seem like similar worlds, but you know There's something a little bit different see like I feel like my my real answer gets too gross like Why don't you give us a fake answer then if you're worried about it? No, I kind of want to hear this gross I think it would probably boil down to like X Mack and a robot and Mackenzie Davis from that one Terminator movie.

Oh, OK. Yeah, I can see that. But, you know, I don't know, we're just making making laugh mops. I don't know, a Vitamix and Eve. All right. Yeah, let's laugh them up, sit up. Yeah. All right. So we've taken that that bizarre detour I don't know. Thank you for that. Is that matrix a robot? Because doesn't she live in a computer? I don't I don't remember. I don't remember spaceballs that well. Oh, but I'm a trick from spaceballs I thought you took my dot matrix from reboot. I'm sorry about that From spaceballs is very much right. Yeah, yeah, Phyllis still a robot. sorry about that. No, no. Oh yeah, Dot Matrix from Spaceballs is very much a robot. Oh right, the Philistiller robot.

Yeah, yeah. No, no, Joan Rivers robot. Oh, Joan Rivers, sorry. Yeah. I got my pioneering aliens and stuff. No, but I think Dan's suggestion, but isn't, so Mackenzie Davis is a... Why are we still?

No, but because she hunts terminators, she's turned herself into more of a robot to do this, so would she kill Alicia Vikander's... No, see that's what makes it hot. It's a forbidden love story. Yeah, it makes sense. Okay, so I just want to explore this. There has to be conflicts, there has to be something taboo, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm into it.

I guess, I don't know, it could just be two married robots that are having a hot night together. That could be the story. I mean, that's the most alien thing I've ever heard you say. Part of what's hot is their commitment to each other. Yeah, exactly. That long-term commitment. What's so sexy about it is knowing that there's a stable grounding for the relationship and

they don't have to worry about anything. I mean, I'm a little aged man, so I agree with that. Who needs a sudden burst of passion? No, no, I want the long-term bickering, reliable relationship of C-3PO and R2-D2. Or clearly either a married couple or, as I mentioned in one of the Flop TV episodes, C-3PO is John Arbuckle, R2-D2 is Garfield. Like that's... BB-8 is Odie, you know?

So, okay guys. So get back to what I was saying before, before that other detour. We've decided, we have identified the theme of a robot movie We've identified some of the characteristics that make a good movie robot I think we should use those things to cinematic mechanic our way into heart beeps But first I believe we have a sponsor who wants to make their voice heard now that we've already heard Dan's voice about which robots He wants to see have sex with each other. Yeah, they love being asked for. They love, yeah, it was my idea and also the sponsor loves being right next to this.

They said, you know our ad will get better play if it's placed next to something disgusting. Sure. Because people's hands are clasped over their face and ears rather than hitting the skip button. Hey, speaking of technology, this episode is supported in part by Squarespace, which is the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. Well, what is Squarespace? It offers an unrivaled suite of visual design effects built in and ready to go on any Squarespace website. I feel like there's something missing in the copy there.

But we're going to soldier on. We're going to say that Squarespace can be used to create an elevated online aesthetic with dozens of modern and intuitive options, fitting every brand, industry, and purpose. With Squarespace, you can connect major social and multimedia accounts to your website in a few clicks as icons, direct links, or embedded feeds. Build visitor trust while updating content only where you need it, extending your brand's footprint. Sorry, for my footpants.

Expanding your brand's footpants. We call them shoes where I live. Snug lately, yeah. Maybe it's my blood pressure. Okay, well go to squarespace.com for a free trial. If any of this has been convincing to you, if you love this footpants talk, why not support it by going to Squarespace,

squarespace.com for a free trial. When you are ready to launch, go to www.squarespace.com slash flop to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. That's it for me. If anyone has any plugs, now's the time. Otherwise, we'll return to the show. I have two plugs that I'd like to plug. The first is that every month DC Comics comes

out with a new issue of Harley Quinn. It's a comic book about everybody's favorite former Joker girlfriend turned superstar in her own right, Harley Quinn. And I write that comic book right now every month. So why not go into your comic book store and say, hey, make mine Harley. And then they'll say, what? And you'll say, could I have the new issue of Harley Quinn, please? And if it's the week that that comes out,

they'll say, here it is. And if it's not the week, they may still have a copy, but you should go in every month to do it. And I also wanted to mention that my new children's book, Sadie Mouse, Wrecks the House, it's a new picture book that I wrote and the great Tim Miller who did the art for it, my other book Horse Meets Dog,

did the art for this as well. It comes out April 22nd and is available for pre-order now from all bookstore places. Please patronize your local independent bookstore. You can just call them bookstores. You don't have to add the places to. Oh, okay. Because I usually add place to things.

I'm going to the drugstore place. I'm going to go to the movie theater place. Please go to your local bookstore and say, make mine Sadie. And they'll say what? And you'll say, can you preorder a copy of Sadie Mouse Wrecks the House by Ellie Kalin? It comes out April 22nd. It's a story of a good little mouse who's tired of having to do all the chores and she decides she's gonna do the chores bad

and she wrecks her house. And my kids think it's funny. So hopefully your kids will too. Sounds delightful. A special thank you to the Max Fun members who joined, boosted, or upgraded their membership during this year's MaxFun Drive. And as a thank you to everyone who supports MaxFun, we're excited to announce that this

year's pin sale is now open! This year's proceeds will go to Transgender Law Center to support their continuing work and advocating self-determination for all people. Everyone at $10 per month or more can purchase Max Fun Drive pins featuring shows from across the network. And all levels are able to buy our 2025 exclusive pin featuring our rad pal, Nutsy the Squirrel. For more info, head to maximumfun.org slash pin sale. And as always, thank you so much for your ongoing support.

Since 2017, Maximum Film has had the same slogan. The podcast that's not just a bunch of straight white guys. Ooh, we've learned something over the years. Some people out there really do not like that slogan. Listen, we love straight white guys. Well, some of them. But if there's one thing we can't change, it's who we are. I'm Ify, a comedian who was on strike last year in two different unions. I'm Dreya, I've been a producer and film festival programmer for decades.

And I'm Alonzo, a film critic who literally wrote the book on queer Hollywood. You can listen to us talk movies and the movie biz every week on Maximum Film. We may not be straight white guys, but we love movies, and we know what we're talking about. Listen to Maximum Film on Maxim maximum fun or wherever you listen to podcasts Guys we are back to Flophouse mini cinematic mechanic today We are going to be fixing the last movie we watched for this podcast that movie was heart beeps starring Andy Kaufman and Bernadette Peters and written and directed by Paul Schrader and So here's the question that we have to go with. Well, we're gonna improve the robots and the robot movie.

First, let's identify, we did last week, let's identify some of the things that are problems with the robots in this movie. One, annoying, very annoying. Two, uncanny valley, they look like people with weird cheeks. Three, they don't do anything. That's the main problem with the movie. The movie is very, the idea of it is,

we're gonna watch two robots go through the stages of falling in love and starting a family while they wander through the New Mexico woods, it turns out, but they don't really do much of anything else. Even though they're chased by a crime buster robot, that doesn't really mean anything. So how do we improve this movie? How do we improve these robots?

What elements are these robots missing that would make them more enjoyable robots? They have like a big cannon on their arms maybe? Yes. Okay, okay. They've got big cannons on their arms. So the Andy Kaufman character, he's a valet robot, right? Yeah.

And Burnett Peters robot is designed purely to flirt with men at pool parties specifically, but they should both have cannons on their arms, what you're saying. I mean, I think that's more realistic to, you know, the sort of, you know, robot industrial complex. Yeah, put cannons on them. The same way that Johnny, Johnny Five from short circuit,

who I'm surprised we haven't mentioned up till this point, he has like a rocket launcher on his back, right? Even though it gets a little on Was there yeah, he has like a he has like a shoulder mounted rocket launcher type thing Yeah So I was arguing that Johnny five was a great robot while not appearing in a great rule about robot picture Great roulette picture either. He doesn't know groupie a does not feature does not We're a great roulette picture either. He doesn't, you know, Croupier does not feature Johnny Five in it.

So. What if though, what if instead of Clive Owen, Croupier had starred Johnny Five? Would the movie be different? Would it still be accepted as a quality film? It's an odd, you know, mix of tones at that point. Sort of a, what's kind of like a brooding neo-noir

with like just a robot in it. And not like a realistic. A really chatterbox robot too, yeah. So for the most part, the humans in this movie wear normal human clothes. Why do the robots wear weird shiny clothes? Why don't they just put them in regular human clothes? That's a good question. I wonder if the robot's metallic bodies

would tear those clothes too easily. Just rip them to shreds, yeah. So they have to wait, yeah, just like the Blondie song, it would rip her to shreds. And so I wonder if that's the reason that they're wearing what appeared to just be vinyl clothes, you know? But it's a good question. So you would put them in regular clothes.

You think that would help it a little bit? First step, regular clothes. So we're fixing these characters. I'm glad we're taking this very sincerely. They both have cannons on their arms. Well, okay. And they're wearing regular clothes. I would say the Val robot as a valet,

he has fully opposable fingers and due to the design of the hand like glove, his fingers are always splayed really crazy. I think he should have just had a sealed closed hand. Oh, okay. So like a mitten more than fingers. Okay. But that's the non-canon hand. My real- Or does he have the thing where a mitten more than fingers. Okay, but that's the non-canon hand.

My real- Or does he have the thing where his mitten hand can kind of drop down on a hinge, revealing a cannon in the arm? Yes, duh. Sorry. Like guts from Berserk, duh. So you're asking for sincerity in fixing it.

Not necessarily, yeah. I'd be like, Bernadette Peters robot, you're doing great. You know, no notes in particular. You can basically be the way you are. Andy Kaufman robot, this voice you've been doing. Okay, let's stop with the voice. Dan, what does that voice, to remind the audience,

what does the voice sound like? He kind of talked like this. I can't actually do it. He's like, he's very tiny. It's a little latke, yeah. I can't actually do it. He's like he's a little like a little lot. It's pretty good. It is like a little lot. And you want a big lot. You want a lot of that can soak up a lot of oil, you know, get real crispy, you know, be a sour cream delivery system. I'm more of an applesauce guy, but that's just me. And I don't plan. I don't

I want I want to taste the lockout and taste the potato. Yeah, and taste the fried at Greece element. Yeah, but not just the fried grease element, yeah. But not just the voice, like in Heart Beeps, not to like return too much to our previous episode, like they talk like dumb children. They do, it is, so that's something that I feel like we didn't really adequately describe in the last episode, which is that it is the thing that movies do often

where they confuse innocence with dumbness. Like a character is naive and innocent, therefore they talk like an idiot. They don't know anything. They sound like they- It's like Newky all over again. Right. It is like Newky all over again, yeah. I prefer a robot that, yeah, like talks with sophistication

for a robot, like it's a lot of, you know, sort of like understanding of facts, but maybe naivete when it comes to, you know, human behavior is fine. C-3PO, sweetie. C-3PO. I mean, I was thinking the exact same thing. You're basically describing C-3PO, who speaks very articulately, but has never, even for a protocol robot who's designed to interact with humans, has no idea what humans are doing at any given moment.

Does not understand when he's cock blocking console. No, and is only, so let's talk about C-3PO in a minute. Okay, there's, I know people who don't like C3PO I've heard the discussions between Jesse Thorne and Tom Sharpling on I think was on bullseye But how much they both hate C3PO whereas and they hate him for the same reasons I love him, which is that he is the worst robot he is only cares about himself is Oblivious to what's going on around him unless in in the way, except the way it affects him. And he's constantly anxious and he's constantly fussy

and he's very short tempered and very, it's very easy for him to get thrown off his game. All these things that you should not see in a robot, but he does them all beautifully. And I think it's partly because Anthony Daniels does such a great job with the voice, but also with the movements of, he's a robot who constantly looks like he is offended

and wants to talk to the manager. Which I think is very funny in a robot. What's also kind of great is I feel like every single other movie of this type, if they had a character like this, that character would have a moment where he shines. Yes. C-3PO never has that moment.

I was just thinking to myself, whether we could make a list of the times he is useful, and I can only think of when he is in Return of the Jedi and able to be a god to these Ewoks and convince them not to eat. And tell the story. The humans that are there. The cannibalistic space bears, yeah. And that's part of the joke of it is that

the one character who's confused for a god is again the most useless, least helpful character. He spends most of Empire Strikes Back just as an annoying voice strapped to Chewbacca's back. And- Giving him directions, which are mainly ignored. Yes, and I love- Rightly.

And I love how in the trash compactor scene that C-3PO is like, oh, it's too late, we've killed them. Like his job, which is to be the liaison between R2-D2 and the others, he's doing so poorly. It is, it shows such, I don't, it's one of these things where like the, you know, George Lucas doesn't get a lot of credit usually for his character personalities, you know, I feel like outside of C3PO and Han Solo and maybe a little bit of Darth Vader, he doesn't get a lot of credit for creating

indelible characters. There's some people like Luke, but I don't, other people who don't, but the C3PO is such a specific funny character to me and he is so out of there's no reason to have him in so much of it except to interpret for R2-D2. Like he's useful when he can interpret sometimes but even when he's interpreting for R2-D2 he does it in a way that is that is totally misunderstanding what's actually important with what's going on in the story. It's so anyway, I love all that about him. So you can have an annoying robot character and have them be the best thing in a movie. I want to toss in, I mean, you know, Leia is pretty intelligible, but I think that Carrie Fisher is bringing almost all of that to that part.

I think none of that is on the page. The personality of that character, if you're just looking at it without her performance, it changes so much from scene to scene. And she's the thing that ties it together, for sure. Yeah, so here's what we need. So these robots either have to be, so we're saying they should not feel, sound like morons, basically.

These robots, they should misunderstand things, but in a way that is smart and specific to them. Because again, they're robots. Why would you make a dumb robot? Again, I feel like we are moving towards that in actual real world technology for some reason. Why would you want to create a robot that gives you just wrong information all the time? That is essentially C-3PO.

He's like, I'm fluent in six million forms of communication, but none of them are basic human emotional signals. So we can make these characters more like C-3PO. Andy Coven's character characters more like C-3PO, is basically what I was saying. Like Andy Coven's character more like C-3PO, which gives him more of an arc. If he is not a lovable, already in love, innocent from the beginning, it gives him a place to go. I feel like with Wally, he starts out as an innocent,

but it is kind of the arc of him understanding that the job he's been doing for years is the wrong job, you know? That the things that he does that are outside his programming where he keeps his old stuff, that is the good stuff that he's doing, you know? Well, plot-wise, you know, I mean, and I'm mentioning this as it sort of associates with his character, like, there should be an inciting incident

that specifically catapults him beyond his comfort zone in a way that then he needs to change his programming, become more human in reaction to it rather than in heartbeats, it really seems to be like, oh, what's going on over there? Let's go look. That's kind of all that motivates them. And yeah, it needs something that's kind of all that motivates them and Yeah, it needs something that sort of like

Out of water thing. I see a rainbow. That's kind of the incitement You see a rainbow closer to it Andy chats with Bernadette Peters about banana daiquiris, dude You don't think that's inciting enough. You don't think that's I guess so. I mean, incite a reaction in me. But the idea of a banana daiquiri opens up a whole world. It's like it's like Ariel finding that fork or whatever in Little Mermaid. It's like, oh, I have to learn more about the civilization that creates us. That would be that would be so much better.

Exactly. Be like, I want to taste what a banana daiquiri is. I've been programmed in with this chatter, but I want to taste what a banana daiquiri is. I've been programmed in with this chatter, but I don't know what a banana daiquiri is. It would be a very funny quest to me if this kicked off just being like, we have to go taste, as robots, a banana daiquiri. Yeah, or she brings it up and he's like, okay, what does it taste like?

And she doesn't have an answer. And then she actually has a quest of her own and not just I follow you around. Yeah. Well now let's talk about the quest because I think this is a great, okay, so Heart Beeps, the characters start talking about Banana Daiquiri's.

She's never been asked the question, what does it taste like before? And now she wants to go on that quest and he's in love with her so he's gonna follow along. Again, this is very Wally Eva where Eva is the one who's like doing stuff and Wally literally stows away to follow along after her. The quest, so the quest in the movie now seems to be

that they need to go somewhere to see a rainbow and then when they get there, they're like, we're running out of power, we gotta go back. Again, we said last week, Fury Road plot structure. What would make this quest more interesting than say, just wandering through the woods and once or twice crime buster threatens them? What like let's quest it up, you know, and we keep in mind they have cannons for arms now So that's that's a thing that could cause them some trouble too

And also that the Andy Covman character is gonna be much more like C3PO So he's constantly complaining and probably getting into trouble because he's not programmed very well at what he does So what what are some things just give me some incidents, some incidents in episodes. This would be very difficult to do in this world where the Stan Winston makeup does not look like people, it looks like weird Energizer characters like we said. But I would-

They're not gonna get mistaken for people in this movie. I would love a scene where because they're on the run, they have to pretend to be human. Instead of pretending to be trees, as they do in the movie. Yeah. Okay. Like they're at a busy bar or restaurant or a public place and like the whole crowd of people

and they have to behave like humans and pass as human. Yeah, they put like masks on, they're like, oh, we gotta protect from COVID. You put your finger on something that is a problem with this movie that I didn't even necessarily realize while watching it because I was so eager to be done with watching it, which is we see them go to a party. They don't pretend to be attendees of the party.

They pretend to be robots that are working at the party. Woody Allen pretending to be a robot and sleeper who works at a party is a joke because he's a person. He's not a robot. For a robot to go to a party and then pretend to be one of the robots working at the party is not particularly funny. It would be much funnier if they're like,

oh, we got invited to this party. Were the robot invitees? Or they pretend they're people and like, oh, that we had work done. We had work done to look like robots or whatever. A person pretending to be a robot and messing it up is funny. A robot pretending a person messing up is funny.

A robot pretending to be a robot and not, and messing it up, you've got to work much harder. It just got to be that much better, you know? So I think that's great. So one scene, they got to go somewhere and be people. Maybe they go to a bar. If this was a movie made, I feel like this movie was made at was made just one year earlier or after,

they would have gone to like a honky tonk bar and they'd have to pretend to be cowboys or something like that. One of them would have to ride a mechanical bull. Yeah, arm wrestle on the rand tan. And someone would hit on one of the robots, like a human being, and they'd be saucy going on. A woman would be hitting on the Andy Kaufman robot,

not recognizing that he is a robot and not a person. And it would be very awkward. And also, Bernetta Peters would be getting, my jealousy circuits are kicking in. I've never felt these before. And be like, but I'm not even responding. Why did they get, why do I feel pain? Like in Star Wars, in Return of the Jedi,

when they're torturing those robots, and it's like, well, why do they put pain sensors on the bottom of that robot's feet? For this scene. For this one moment. You know, we gotta make sure that these robots, which are, you know, they're just untiring workers that can do dangerous jobs,

that they feel pain while they're doing it. That is, it's a statement on capitalism. Cruelty is the point. Yeah, yeah, I guess so. So, okay, so they have to go to a bar, and maybe a honky tonk bar, maybe not, and pretend that they are maybe it's a swing dancing bar and they've got a swing dance and they win a competition or something like that.

But they accidentally blow everybody up. They think it's part of the show. What's another what's another fun adventure for these robots to have? Let's come up with like two more. And then I think we'll have maybe fixed heart beeps. What are some fun robot adventures? Fun robot adventures. Okay. We've already talked about having to find the banana daiquiri. Yes. Are we going to keep the idea that they...

And maybe at the bar they're just about to almost drink it when they accidentally start a bar fight. It gets knocked out of their hands. Oh no, they were so close. You know. Are we going to keep the baby robot story? This is? Okay, so let's talk about it. This is a big question. It's a big part of the movie that they are becoming parents. They're experiencing the things that parents do. As I said during the episode where we talked about this movie,

that made me really mad. It felt like they were trying to tug on my heartstrings in a way that I didn't give them consensual permission to. So I had to bat their hand away from my heartstrings. So do we keep that little baby robot, Phil? What do you guys think? I don't think it's necessary. I think that it's enough to be like,

oh, can two robots fall in love? But if we did keep it, I would add that much later in the film. I would be like, that seems like that should be a third act thing that happens, is like they create this life together. Do you wanna have like a weird birth scene or should it be the way it is where they like build it?

Like show them how to like squirt it out. I don't want any body horror thinking. I don't want a robot birth. I've seen Teton, I know what a good movie looks like. It just shows Dan that the act of birth, maybe the most beautiful act of creation, a human, great. That goes straight to horror for you. You're right. I was talking about that and not the idea of a robot giving birth.

Oh no, my water broke. This is a very dumb idea, but somehow in my head, I really want to see the matter. Is that in the water world world? So if they call it water, they should circuit. I want to see them at a water park where they keep being, people keep trying to encourage them to go down the water slide and they're like, ugh, we can't. So they've gone to the bar, they're hiding out

with the people who think they're, the woman who thinks they're humans, oh, the next day she's going to a water park. They have to go with her or else they'll blow their cover. And so they can't get wet, yeah, because they're grandmas. See, this is what I'm saying, likes the screen writing gurus say, you gotta get your heroes up a tree and throw rocks at them There weren't very many rocks being thrown at these care to be fair. There were a lot of trees though. They passed a lot of trees

Now it's now taking out the shrub the little kid it raises a question it opens a Pandora's box I'm not sure you want to get open which is is, do we need cat skill? Is necessary part of the movie? Does this podcast need an Elliot Kaelin in it? Wow. It is. So if I'm cat skill, which I guess, Dan, you're Andy Kaufman and Stuart, you're burning at Peter's. Unfortunately, fucking dream. Yeah. And I'm cat skill. I guess we're saying, can I meet Dick Miller? Shows up in one scene. No, and I'm cat skill

Shows up in one scene. No, I don't think you could be dick Miller So well, okay. I'll let you be dick Miller sure. Thank you for Halloween. I dream Dan if you dress up as dick Miller for Halloween, how would you do that? What would you just get a mask? So they would be a generic set though, so it Halloween, get beloved character actor. Well, so it would be, they would make it a generic set though, so it would just say beloved character actor, and it would clearly be a Dick Miller costume. Yeah. No, I mean, I would have to. The same way that you get a jumpsuit and a proton pack,

but it says like, Spirit Fighter. Yeah, the Dick Miller one is older gremlin dislike. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Snowplow victim, question mark? Older gremlin dislike Snowplow victim Movie with one bandage on his forehead just like an exit advantage that that's what he got from the snow great

So Dan, what are you saying? So you want makeup? You know like some like forehead lines some smile lines and then okay, you know Where like old man clothes? Because in most of his most of his roles, he's just wearing regular clothes It's rare that that Dick Miller is wearing something flashy, you know Yeah, I just mean like, you know, like old man like he's of like an earlier generation. You can like 10. He's like You know Dick Miller. I think you look at him. You like, this guy was cool, but he's also older now. You know? Yeah.

I feel like if he's in a movie that has exciting costumes, it's important for him to look like a normal guy. Yeah, I agree, I agree. He's like the janitor who cleans up after He-Man or something. So this is all to say that Catskill stays in the movie. So what does Catskill, does Catskill get, in this movie he does get a scene

where he kinda proves his worth by giving his life literally to Phil. That is that moment that you expect C-3PO to get in another movie that he never gets. Does Catskill need that moment, or can he just be like a real Borscht Belt hack, you know, hack stinker, the whole movie? Yeah, he can just be,

I don't know that he needs that moment, but it is weird that they make it out to be like, these robots have their specialties. The specialties never come into play really. There's no moment where Catskills gets up on stage and people are like, yeah! Catskills! They like him at the party.

They like his joke at the party. Joke's the party. He doesn't help in any way. The closest it comes, but it feels like if you're gonna have three robots who have different strengths, like that should pay off at some point in the film. Maybe I'm crazy.

I mean, that would be kind of textbook screenwriting. We've been talking about robots a lot. I don't think it has to happen with all of them, but. We haven't even mentioned probably one of the most popular robot movies, the Transformers films, which we've talked about. Robot jocks. Yeah.

They're not even robots, dude. They're driving little things. They don't even spell jocks properly. Yeah, there's a lot of problems with that, with calling robot jocks a robot movie. Those are mechs, Dan. Yeah. So Transformers, let's talk about,

what does Transformers do so right that it's been such a successful series and that people love so much and the stories are so great. Is it, you're saying this movie also needs a character who has laminated the rules about what constitutes statutory rape and what doesn't in case the police officer gets mad at him. Oh, forgot about that.

What a weird moment in a weird movie. It is the thing that sticks out to me the most from those movies because it's so unnecessary. It's not fun. And it's like, yeah, I took my kids to see this action movie about robots that change shape. Oh, this guy's gonna spend a whole scene justifying why he has a relationship

with a 17 year old girl. Like, I don't like it. I don't like it at all. You know? Or the two young robots who speak in slang and can't read. Yeah, I guess. I don't like that. And I do like that there's a robot with a beard though.

What about the robot that has the giant swinging wrecking ball testicles? That's right. The secret to their success is crassness and racism. It makes me wonder if every Transformers movie, Michael Bay was like, why doesn't my friend John Waters take over one scene in this movie? Every installment.

And John Waters is like, well, of course this robot needs huge wrecking ball balls. And Michael Bay's like, I gave you total control today. I don't like it, but you've got to do it. You got plenty of time for this one scene. What if this character's all talking about all about their illegal taboo busting cross-age relationship? All right, John, you're America's favorite dirty uncle.

I can't say no to you. Even this a billion dollar franchise, but go for it. TJ Miller has been in this movie, beloved by America. Let's just kill him with no fanfare. Cogman, I think we can all agree Cogman is awesome. Cogman the robot butler guy, you remember Cogman? I don't remember Cogman. You don't remember Cogman from Transformers the last night?

I think you'll find that I retain very little about the Transformers series. So what is it Stuart that makes them successful robot movies to make? Because again the Transformers, they don't do a, Stuart, that makes them successful robot movies to make? Because again, the Transformers, they don't do a lot of the stuff that Dan was talking about earlier about what it was mean to be human. They're aliens.

They're not like, they're aliens who happen to be sentient machines. That's what makes it different, I think. But they also turn into cars and dinosaurs. Yeah, the morphing. So you're saying that in Heartbeats, so let's say it's the big climax, we're going to the climax of the movie

Are we keeping the crime buster story or is there some kind of robot police that's after them or something like that? There's got to be something that's that they're that they're in danger from so let's say it's crime buster But he's like but it's 80 to a nine. Let's say you know nine. He's been out of work for a while They hired him for heartbeats. I would argue if you are if you are trying to Tell this kind of a story and you're going to have the crime buster character The conclusion of the crime buster character should not involve an armed conflict where they like Deactivate him or whatever. It should be that they like convince him that he's wrong. Basically They like you say that could be the more a cat skill makes Crime Buster laugh or they share a banana daiquiri with him and it messes with the

circuits and he becomes a loving robot. Yes, thank you. The taste of a banana daiquiri poured through his intake port. Famous Iranian film, Taste of Banana Daiquiri. No robots in that movie, surprising. So it would be the power of love or banana daiquiris that stops crime buster. Or that they have changed so much that they are not behaving like robots anymore, so he does not want to capture them. And there's a moment in the movie

that almost gets to that point, where it doesn't compute that they're acting like humans and not robots. But I think that's a surprisingly sweet way to end it, is that the robot police officer no longer recognizes them as robots. They've done it. They've done every robot in a movie's dream

of becoming a person. It's that Pinocchio aspect Dan was talking about. Maybe some of their robot parts start becoming all squishy and fleshy like in Existence or something. And then you go, and now she can't give birth to Tane's style. And then Dan is thinks it's sexy again. And so then we basically I guess have to rip off the end of Short Circuit 2, which was

also a rip off of the end of Mack and Me. We're naturalized citizens. And they take the citizenship oath and they're robot citizens. Oh god, I forgot about that. That's awesome. Yeah. They're robot citizens. Oh, God, I forgot about that. That's awesome. Yeah, there's a, I wish that Mack and me was not about them discovering the aliens and all that, but was just about them studying for the citizenship exam.

Because as far as we can tell, they can barely talk. They can just kind of whistle at each other and they look like they're so totally at a loss to understand anything that's going on around them at any moment. How they memorized the first 10 amendments in the Bill of Rights, like I don't know. I don't know how they did it. I've, guys, I've never seen Mac and Me. Should I watch it?

What? You've never seen it. I have seen it too many times since we had to do a mystery science theater for it. I've seen it. At this point, it might be in the double digits of times I've seen Mac and Me, but at some point we might have to do Mac and Me just so you can see its story. Yeah, I'd like to see it. And I feel like you probably want to share with you. Oh my god. Yeah, that's a classic No I think I've told the story before of being at a sleepover might have been at my house where we were watching the first half Of Mac and me and the and the parents came in and said

No, couldn't have been my house because it wasn't on my mom I mean, it was my the kids mom came in and was like you're gonna have to finish watching this movie tomorrow because it's late And we were all like, but do gonna have to finish watching this movie tomorrow because it's late. And we were all like, but do we have to finish watching it tomorrow? Like, can we just leave it unfinished here? We did finish it the next day though. So I guys just, I think we're running out of time in this episode of a Flophouse Mini cinematic mechanic,

but I think we did what we needed to do. I think we fixed heartbeats. The characters are, they're like, they have a stronger reason for leaving the factory, which is to learn the taste of a banana daiquiri. We've given Bernadette Peters more of a starring role in it. Andy Kaufman's voice, I assume, we'll have to eat. We can just take it for granted that it's changed.

Dan, can you just jump onto Facebook Messenger and hit up Uncle Paul Schrader and tell him all these tweaks and changes? You guys talk through letterboxed a lot, right? Yeah. And they're not dumb characters anymore. They're just kind of unknowing. They're much more like C-3PO. They have cannons in their arms and mitten hands.

If they make a baby, it's much later on after their parts start becoming fleshy, Cronenberg style, through the power of kind of love. Or maybe they're a different version of this is they are literally stealing the organs of humans and putting them in their own bodies. Sure, sure. Make them more lovable. Yeah, kind of like a more criminal version of Jonas from the book of the new sun,

a robot who's getting flesh parts put on him, a reverse tin man. And by the end of the movie, they're so human that they're no longer robots and Crimebuster just doesn't wanna stop them, perhaps aided by having a banana daacquery poured into its drink intake port. Perfect film. Perfect film.

We keep the same score, great score, and we add in a scene at a bar, a scene at a waterpark. A second scene with Dick Miller. A second scene with Dick Miller. And I think we'd say that maybe that's just Dan in his Dick Miller costume. I'll play him. Yeah. And I think we fixed it that maybe that's just Dan in his Dick Miller costume. I'll play him. Yeah, and I think we fixed it. So we fixed Heartbeats. We finally made it a movie that really deserves to be on the same level as American Gigolo,

Mishima, First Forms, the great films and Paltraders. Dark Downer, Blue Collar. Oh yeah, Blue Collar. Thank you. Oh, for sure. So you know what? It's time for us to go back and watch some more Paul Schrader movies, including Heartbeats. Thanks so much everybody for listening. I want to thank my guests slash co-hosts, Dan McCoy and Stuart Wellington. I want to thank our producer, Alex Smith. You may find him online as Howell Doddy, where he is a talented musician,

but he is the one who edits this and makes it all good and probably put some sound effects in there here and there. I don't know, maybe some like, shoo shoo, you know, those kinds of sound effects. The ratchet ratchet, you know, gear head type sound effects. We are a member of the Maximum Fun Podcast Network. Go to maximumfun.org and listen to some of the other great podcasts that are there. Go to maximumfun.org slash join.

If you want to become a member as a pledger, the is over but you can still do it you know there's nothing stopping you there's nothing in rule book I'm not stopping you until next week when we will be talking about a movie as opposed to nonsense though I think we'll get some nonsense in there join us next time we're gonna be talking about the electric state and until then I remain Elliott Kaelin. I've been Dan McCoy I am Stuart Bot Wellington Bot. Oh, no, it works backwards guys. We've got we got to fix Stuart before the next episode Maximum fun a worker-owned network of artists owned shows supported directly by you