The Flop House - FH Mini 16 - Jackie Chan?

Episode Date: October 17, 2020

Dan challenges Stu and Elliott to a Jackie Chan-related duel.

Oh man, good to be back in the saddle. The saddle in Seattle. Yeah, by that I mean back in my storage room to sit on an uncomfortable stool because I don't think it'd be a good idea to... I don't think any podcaster should have a comfortable chair. It's an uncomfortable position to be in where you are sharing your views over the internet with the entire world audience. Yeah, after so much time in quarantine,

when you talked about your uncomfortable chair, my immediate reaction was to say, I'm sorry, baby. So Stuart, how would you have reacted if I had said, I'm sorry, baby. I'd have been like, I'd have been like, oh no problem, sweet thing. Now Dan, what is it about quarantine that makes you call other people, baby? The fact that I am quarantined with my girlfriend who is- Can you call your girlfriend, baby?

The frequently, I mean, this is like the most, the person I see most during quarantine is by far. No, no, it's just because I never call my wife, baby. It's just not the way we talk. You say sweetie. I heard sweetie or lovey. Yeah, I don't like. I got to say, you know, like we all, you know, different strokes. Don't care for lovey. Don't never. Well, I love he is. Lovey is out there. Lovey is along the edge, my friend. I mean, I don't see how it's, I don't see how it's anymore extreme than comparing her to a baby. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, that's, that's not doing when he looks at her.

Yeah, I think that's the one thing on this. No, no, he sees her as a baby, baby, new year specifically with a sash that says 2021, because he's looking forward to baby new year specifically with a sash that says 2021 because he's looking forward to that new year. I mean, to be honest, the prospect of reaching 2021 kind of gives me a boner. Have we started? Who knows? No, we haven't probably started now.

Hey, everyone, this is the flop house. I'm Daniel Koei. I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Elliot Kaelin, eager to see what is going house. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Elliot Kaelin, eager to see what is going to pop out of Dan McCoy's mouth next. Yeah, well, because this is an off week, normally on the show we watch a bad movie then we talk about it, but we've taken to doing these mini-sodes on off weeks that you know we want to do in the moment and they have made the mistake Yeah, of putting me in the driver seat tonight and boy, how do I have a surprise for them and for you?

Oh, well, I just hope it's kind of like it's kind of like this puzzle box that I got all of a sudden I'm like, oh, I guess I solved it. What's gonna come out? Oh, it chains with of a sudden I'm like, oh, I guess I solved it. What's gonna come out? Oh, it chains with food. Oh, no. Santa bites. Now, Dan, I'm just hoping this mini-sode is different from when you surprised us with your Dan McCoy mini-sodas,

which were actually your pee and tiny airplane bottles. Yeah, but I mean, the portions was what bothered you though, right? That was the, yeah. Yeah, I said, do you know more that sweet P uh-huh Elliot Gucci only junior over here hey Stewart he is investment in that made turn out to be true someday that's the sex of the future you're right this I'm not forward

thank you it isn't I feel like there's definitely there's a movie to be made I'm not the one to make it about Bob Gucci only the porn millionaire who then lost everything in his dual Assumptions that the future would be golden showers and cold fusion But he spent years throwing money away at cold fusion research And also good showers so guys I'm just making a little note here and let's we'll go.

Is that note going to play into the episode later? Yeah, well, I was just check off note. I was giving myself a little indicator of when maybe I should stop to read the ad. It's nothing exciting. So let's maybe not talk about it anymore. Here's my many for you. Gentlemen, on episode 213, Christian Mangle,

if you will recall, I have some confusion over Jackie Chan. Dan, I don't even remember that we did the movie Christian Mangle. I watched the first half of Hard Target too. I watched a movie called Mr. Nice Guy the other day. You know the Jackie Chan movie? No, I don't think that was it. Who's in it, a different one?

You don't think that was it? So like, you know, whoever Jackie Chan was in the movie, you're not one of the biggest stars in the world. I tell you, Jackie Chan usually makes a pretty specific impression. No, wait, it was not like, it's not like you couldn't remember if it was like, whether it was like James A. Gar or John A. Gar, like, you know, some, it's a, or Peter Graves, you know, something like that. And a movie from the 50s. All right.

Maybe I was thinking of a different movie. This story didn't go on. You still don't know if Jackie Chan was in it. No. Here's Dan. I'm going to ask you one simple question. Was Jackie Chan in the movie? Jackie Chan.

Whatever movie I watched, it did not have Jackie Chan. So it's not the mr. Nice guy that Stewart is referring to now let's checkmate let's not pretend we live in this where you could have seen mr. Nice guy with Jackie Chan it was not that movie I think we established through this one piece of information all right Sherlock Holmes do this one piece of information. All right, Sherlock Holmes. Slilock Fox. Thanks for it.

Yeah, thanks for it. I just wanted to take out an amazing double down that you had maybe watched a Jackie Chan movie and somehow had forgotten that the very unique star Jackie Chan, who is said this is of martial arts virtuality and slapstick humor is unparalleled in my mind by anyone in the world that you didn't somehow over, over what is contributions to all of them.

Who was the guy who did a really funny ladder battle with four organized crime hitmen? I don't even remember, there's no way of saying. a funny ladder battle with four organized crime hitmen. I don't even remember. There's no way of saying. All right. We're just going to have to assume we're in some universe where it both was and was not Jackie Chan until through

observing the film, we collapse those possibilities in two long points in time. Sure. All right. He couldn't know if he was in the movie or not. Oh yeah. Yeah. It was like yesterday. Now the explanation of what actually happened. Jackie Chan is not in the movie yesterday. No. He is not in the movie yesterday.

No. I'm pretty sure. Now. Will he be in tomorrow? Sorry. Sorry. He's not a joke. it's really gonna be in tomorrow. God damn, I'm sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, it's too, it's okay, it's fine. Well, the explanation of what actually happened in that clip there is that I had gotten the title of the Anna Kendrick Sam Rockwell hitman comedy, Mr. Wright, confused with Mr. Nysky

because they're both generic names with mr. in them However, in the moment as it unspilled unspilled I Unspilled as an unspilled I decided it would be funnier to go along with your confusion about me not knowing if Jackie Chan was in a particular This this seems like a pretty strong retcon that Dan's like no no i knew the whole time out you fell into my trap listeners you'd be the judge do you think that i actually know whether jackie chan was in a movie or that my explanation makes sense this is some real doctor light was to the bottomize by the jl a type retconning

right here guys you're falling right to my trap because since then i've had the reputation of never knowing if jackie ch Chan is in a movie. So tonight I'm turning the tables on you, the stew and Elliot. Wait, but are you gonna do it in a cool way that Jackie Chan would turn tables to keep attackers away from him? Yeah. Well, why do you do like, why do you have some vases out of the air? Yeah, they'd be like, why did these goons let Jackie Chan go into a table factory? Mm-hmm.

Why did they allow Jackie Chan to go anywhere with furniture? Don't you know that's his super strength? Yeah, so here we go. This is what's gonna happen tonight. I'm gonna read you some IMDB plot synopsis, and you're gonna tell me, based on the plot, whether it's a Jackie Chan movie or not

and take note you know in the rules of this game a Jackie Chan movie is defined as any of the 141 movies where Jackie Chan has an acting credit minus whichever of those movies are animated movies so I'm not gonna make you remember whether he was a voice and you mentioned In you mentioned in the rules of the game. I want to mention that in Renoir's rules of the game. Jackie Chan does not appear Thank you. That is correct Now what happens if we Yeah, what happens if we score more point because we've already gotten a point that's a point right before the games Even started that's how good we are so we get I'm not you can't take

So what happens if we win the game, Dan? You always, you always one stakes to it. I mean, let's keep in mind that the last time you put a game before us and we won, you did not follow through. I think the stakes are getting faster. You want to put another. That's the thing.

Like why would you put another thing on me that you know I'm just not gonna do? That's fair. That's the thing, like why would you put another thing on me that you know I'm just not going to do? That's fair, that's fair. You are, we are dealing with the Republican Party at this point. It is our fault for assuming that you would abide by the norms. That's fair. All right.

Well, it would just be a list of additional tasks you'd have to complete when you eventually shuffle off this mortal coil and get to the afterlife and they're like, well, Dan, you got to do these things before you can get to your eternal slumber and you're like, ugh, final frost tips, I'll lick this dog to it, do it, maybe. If that's all it takes to get me into heaven, I will do it. I knew said heaven, we didn't say heaven, Dan, we just said the afterlife. Oh, well then I won't do it.

I'll prevent myself from doing it, If it means that I can just sit around and haunt you guys. That's fair, because in the afterlife you will be headed for the serious drive. That's true. Is that sung by the cherry pop and dany? No, it's not. No, that is. It's the squirrel nutter voice. The squirrel nutter voice.

Oh, my mistake. It's a great pop and dany. Oh my excuse. I forgot about Dan's Neo swing group, the cherry pop and dany's. Okay, so guys, here's the first one. I forgot about Dan's Neo swing group, the cherry pop and Danis. Okay, so guys, here's the first one. This is the synopsis. These are contributed by IMGB users. In certain cases, they're edited for length and clarity, but these are all IMGB. If one of them uses the phrase rumblin the Bronx, you didn't edit that out, right? Yeah. Well, we shall see. Okay. Now, number one, May 1960, Mount Everest, the second step

under the cliff. The four members of the China Everest climbing commando are attacking the most difficult and most difficult second step So these were edited for clarity, but not to avoid Moronixy This is their fifth assault. What is Jackie Chan in this movie? Is the tough one it sounds kind of like a Jackie Chan movie, but I'm not I'm not sure It sounds a little bit like Operation Condor, but I didn't I can't remember if that's a tough one. It sounds kind of like a Jackie Chan movie, but I'm not sure. It sounds a little bit like Operation Condor, but I didn't, I can't remember if that's a period film or not.

Because there's a mountain in that, right? Yeah, Mount Condor. Yeah, I feel like they run around there like jumping around like old Nazi crap, but I can't remember exactly. I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say this is a Jackie Chan movie. I'm going to go out on that limb with you. I will also say it's a Jackie Chan movie.

Yes, this is a Jackie Chan movie. This is called The Climbers. It came out just last year, 2019. Oh, okay. I wonder I wasn't aware of it. Yeah. Okay. So, your next movie is this. that's two points one question two points. Oh, okay A hot headed young butcher who is also a kung fu disciple gets embroiled in a feud with a rival Shaolin temple

I mean, that's a feels like like a pretty straightforward premise, Elliot. It does. I mean, like, that could describe a lot of movies. Yeah, the Godfather, Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. They're all pretty much that Tootsie. Susperia.

Susperia. Susperia meets Tootsie. Yeah. And then there was Susperia meets Tootsie versus Rebecca of Sunnybrook farm. But the whole thing was just it just felt like it was a sequel to Tootsie that they just shoehorned the other crap. I mean, to be fair, he is mostly just bringing back the Dorothy character in Tootsie. And then at the very end, he joins that German dancing school for like two scenes. And then Rebecca Sunnybrook farm just shows up at the end as the day S X Rebecca.

Yeah, and you're just you're the audience is going to show up just for that. You're okay for the whole movie. Take it like Joe Black or some shit. Wait, there's like four or five people named Rebecca in that like neighborhood and that like general area. Is that Rebecca Sunday Cyningbrook Farm or is that Rebecca with like the weird mole or is that Rebecca who like makes the really good lemon bars? Like which Rebecca? Or the second Mrs. DeWinter? Yeah, could be. Actually, the first Mrs. DeWinter was Rebecca. We never learned the name of the second Mrs. DeWinter. So I think Stuart, let's just say it's a Jackie Chan movie. It's a butcher.

Yeah, I mean, it's got a bit of a... It's a little similar to what Meals on Wheels, but you know, maybe it's, but that's not it. Wheels on Wheels. It's also, yeah, is it too close to God of Cookery? Who knows? I'm afraid this is not a Jackie Chan movie. This is the magnificent butcher from 1979 starring Samo Hung. magnificent butcher from 1979 starring Samo Hung, contemporary, but not Jackie Chan himself. Yeah, that's true. Another graduate of the same circus school, I think.

Yeah, yeah. Okay, so this next movie, the synopsis goes as follows, a company that wishes to people, I don't know what that means, a company that wishes to people. Now you't know what that means, a company that wishes to people looking for. Now you said this was edited for clarity. Yeah, but not well. Okay. A company that wishes to people looking for a day away

from their ordinary lives. I think grants wishes to people looking for a day away from their ordinary lives. I think grants is the missing. Okay, I mean so far this could be the lobster, but continue. Yeah, no, that's it. That's it. I didn't say there were all good synopsis

than just saying that they're ones that I found. So, oh, so that's the whole synopsis? That's the whole thing. That's the reading again. That's not a synopsis. Grant's wishes to people looking for it. I think, you know what, I think that something got cut here accidentally. So I'm not gonna even...

I'm not even gonna... I'm not even gonna... It was Jackie Chan personal Taylor 2013, but I think something got lost in the cutting and pasting things. That's too bad. Next time. Yeah, yeah, Save that for Jackie. It was this a Jackie Chan movie part two.

Yeah. OK. The next one. Stuart, how cool is it going to be when he has Jackie Chan come out to read the last one? I'm going to lose my mind. That's what a huge, great surprise that's going to be for the listeners too.

That's so cool. I'm going to wake my wife, my wife. I'm so excited. I'm just fucking up my words. I'm going to wake my wife up off the couch and be like, you need to come in here, Jackie Chan is here. And she's going to be like, what the fuck are you talking about? I'm like, I know you're not dreaming and I start pinching her

and she's like, stop doing that. I told you to stop doing that. And I'm like, I know but this is a special occasion Jackie Chan's here and so I'll bring her in and by that point Jackie Chanell hold left He's all gone off camera and she'll think I'm making it up. Yeah, we're gonna get a big fight Yeah, so we so mad now and imagine what a disappointment It'll be when it turns out it's actually shotgun still great cool, but not Jackie I mean, that would be very impressive Maybe great still a great get for Dan, but it would be weird to have Shaka Khan when unrelated, but yeah

I mean, it's still exciting, but we know it's gonna be Jackie Chan So again, I don't want to ruin it for the listeners, but it's gonna be such a great surprise when Jackie Chan comes out at the end So okay, Dan what's the next one? Because didn't was all sorts of famous people. He works with Trevor Noah. He hangs out with, who, with, what's his face? Yeah, famous guy, David Hype years. He's always hanging out with David Hype years.

I am. And him and David Hype years and Bobby Connevalet are always hanging out together. They call themselves, they call themselves the three babes good tears because they're always on the hunt for babes. Yeah. Not David Hyde Pierce, is he? Anyway. And occasionally, they just steal over and prank Jim Parsons house because he's also

like the unofficial fourth babes good dear. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This one is The synopsis is as follows a humble bit a humble businessman with a buried past seeks justice When his daughter is killed in an act of terrorism. That's a hundred percent a Jackie Chan movie a cat and mouse conflict It sews with a government official whose past may hold clues. So is that the one with Pierce Brosnan and Jackie Chan? I think so. Yeah. Yeah. Let's say it's a Jackie Chan movie. Okay. Yes.

That is the foreigner 2017 starting Pierce Brosnan and Jackie Chan. Yeah. The one where in the on the poster, it looks like Jackie Chan is tiny and fierce, but it's gigantic. Yeah, it's like that shot in that Fas and Furious movie where it looks like Vin Diesel's bigger than the rock and you're like, I don't think that's how it works, but okay. Okay, so, uh, next movie,

here's the summary, a small town priest struggles with his faith. A small town priest struggles with his faith. Now that sounds like Diary of a country priest which is not a Jackie Chan in that movie with Ethan Hawke? Oh, oh, first, first, first, performed. Yeah, let me take a time and first your phone. Let me try. I mean, I? Has the has now is Jackie Chan. Jackie Chan play her husband from the beginning of the movie.

I don't I'm trying to remember. I don't think so. Okay. So what other movies is it? It's not weird. Jackie Chan play the really skinny polar bear in the YouTube video. That even hawk watches. Now was is Jackie Chan the kind of like angel that loses his wings in the losing my religion video from R&M?

Is that the one? I mean, that's not a movie, Ellie. That's a music video. It's a movie level music video. I guess it's a credit, no credit, it's a credit, you're right. Let's see, other movies about priests struggling with their faith. Are there any?

I think that might be all three of them. Oh, wait, wait, hold on except for nuns on the run. They're not priests. They're technically not struggling with their faith so much as like they're pretending to be nuns. Yeah. Well, what about Cyster act? No, that's again another one about it. Okay. What about we're not nuns, a hideout story. We're no angels. There are no angels hiding out as priests. And what about Oh God, you deafler? Who's Jackie?

What about how this guy makes a deal with the devil to write songs? And what about 18? 18 again, is both of them. What about doubt? Is this doubt starring Jackie Chan? So what's your answer here? What's this Jackie Chan?

Is it one more spotlight? Is it spotlight? And no, I'm going to say, what do you think? I think it's not a Jackie Chan movie. What do you think? I don't think it is. No, this is Winter Light from 1963. I guess the right one. I guess the right one.

I guess the right one. Yes, yep. Well, your guess is correct. Okay, here's one that could be Jackie Chan. Do you know? An unconventional cop who doesn't take any bulls. Reporters wonder about the last word of a newspaper tycoon.

An unconventional cop who doesn't take any bull is paired up with an amazing detective to capture some powerful criminals. But the cop soon realizes that his by the book partner has split personality disorder. Is that a Jackie Chan movie or no? He's played cops. He's played or no? He's played cops He's played cops before he's played super cop. He's played a a rush hour cop

He's played a police story cop. He's been a Shanghai night. Yeah, two police story cops I don't think he was teamed up with anyone with multiple personality disorder and I don't think he had multiple personalities order No, that sounds closer to the plot of the hit movies multiple personalities order. No, that sounds closer to the plot of the hit movies. Second site, starring Brunson, Pin Show, and John Lerichette. I mean, there he has psychic powers, I guess. Yeah, that's true. He's magic in that one. I'm going to say this is not a Jackie Chan movie. You know what, just to play devil's advocate, which is not a Jackie Chan movie, it stars Keanu Reeves and Al Pacino. Are you 100% sure that he's not in that movie let me double check he might be the woman that turns out his counter

Reeves's sister that the devil wants them to have sex. Yes, I as I've mentioned before on the podcast that was probably the most awkward movie I remember watching with my parents. I'm gonna go out on limb and say and disagree with Stuart just to cover our bases that this is a Jackie Chan. Did it wasn't awkward to watch it with my parents? I'm gonna say that you and your parents had a great time watching Devil's advocate and it was in no way weird at all. Yeah, no, that's true. We have a pretty open family. So this this movie about an unconventional cop paired with a by the book's cop who has split personality disorder is loose cannons from 1990 starring Gene Hackman and Dan Acroid and no Jackie no Jackie Chan. Oh, terrible movie loose cannons I saw that I think I think swing shift or whatever it is the the Pat Maria J. Leno movie. Yeah, that's that's collision course.

Swing course. Goldie Han and Kurt Russell. That's right. That collision course is on a I forgot what streaming platform right now. And I was like, I think I might have to watch this movie. Yeah. Yeah, it was like the other day. It worked together.

It was like the other day when I'm like Oh man, I got a couple of hours to kill what am I gonna watch and I pulled up HBO Max and critters to was the first thing The pop up and I don't like I think I broke my PlayStation controller hitting play Okay, so moving on this is another fairly generic So was that wait was was that a comedy loose cannons or was no can't well Well, depends on whether you're talking about the filmmakers intent or the audience's reaction. Yeah, that's a very Detonate a lot here on the podcast. Yeah, no, they tried to make it a comedy. It is a bad movie that both

Makes light of a mental disorder and is not funny. Yeah, if they're gonna be offensive about somebody at least be funny, right Dan? Yeah. Stewart, I'm entrapping Dan. Okay. Yeah, let's try. Let's entrap him.

Let's make him slide his butt down under some lasers. Yeah, that's what entrapment means. If you look in the dictionary, it says one, to entrap someone, two, to show your butt sliding under lasers. What's that like the line from the trailers of those? That's not blackmail, that's entrapment. No, no, he said he goes entrapment. That's a police word.

You mean blackmail or something like that. That's how he knows that she's actually an undercover cop pretending to be a criminal. It's she's an entrapment in a black male. But really, he's still just thinking about her butt in his pants. Or, wait, was that the trailer where he goes? Me, I'm the medicine man.

No, no, it's the one where he said, you're finding Forester now, dog. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, okay, and that, looks like we've got a real hunt for red October on our ass. These gentlemen are extraordinary. Join my bowling league. That's what that's about, right?

It might as well be. It's a terrible movie. So, okay, this is a very generic style. Well, well, well, you old Zodaz you. Uh-huh, yeah. But like I said these are these are used user contributed so not all of them are gonna be great this one says this is in the last night it's a first night here's a synopsis for you a man looking for

the release of a longtime prisoner takes a police officer his daughter and a group of strangers hostage. A man looking for the release of a long-time prisoner takes a police officer, his daughter, and a group of strangers hostage. I mean, if it wasn't a police officer, that's the plot of Air Force One. Yeah. Let's see, which Jackie Chan is not in. Let's see which Jackie Chan is not in And if it was instead of a police officer in his daughter was a boarding school full of kids that would be toy soldiers or masterminds

or masterminds starring Patrick Stewart and Vincent What's his name? Yep Vincent Gallo. Let's see. And if it was Patrick Stewart as like an evil therapist, it would be conspiracy theory with Mel Gibson. Yes. And if it was John Lithgaos, a guy with multiple personalities, it would be raising Kane. And also kind of a Fubanzai.

And if it wasn't a movie, but a of a fast food chain where you can buy chicken fingers, it would also be called a raisin cane. If it was a chain where you didn't get chicken fingers, instead chicken stars, that would be Carl's Jr. Wait, you get chicken stars. So when you go to Carl's Jr. He certainly don't get the, you don't get a hamburger. I mean, you can, but it's not really the thing that would have segwayed from what you were talking about. So you base your Carl's Jr. order on

a comedy bit? I mean, I base it on what my kids like to eat, which is chicken stars. Your kids like to eat chicken stars? Yes. Okay. and stars? Yes. Okay. Story checks out. So is it some guys in jail and I'm killing you. Like he's the Senate. He's grilling me like I'm a Carl's in your hand right over here. Yeah, I'm Katie Porter over here with the fucking whiteboard. Yeah, now I got to hold up my notes to show that I don't have any notes. Oh, there's a topical joke from today's news. Okay. So it's he's a I'm going to say it is the last one was not a Jackie Chan movie. What didn't give us two nose and a rose possible, but I think this is actually a Jackie Chan movie. Okay. I'll go with Stuart on this when I trust his instincts. Jackie Chan. You guys are both correct.

This is Jackie Chan. This is police story lock down released in 2013. I haven't seen that one. I'll be there. I only know the classic police stories. Yeah, it's a much later sequel. And of course, I got the Jackie Chan's LA police story

featuring Steve Martin. Here's one for you. A daughter tries to remedy her dysfunctional relationship with her ailing father, a decorated baseball scout by helping him in a recruiting trip, which could be his last. That's trouble with the curve, Dan. That's trouble with the curve with Clint Eastwood. It just doesn't really get what Rachel led like Amy Adams. That is trouble with the curve. Don't give us that shit, Dan. But just to make it look like a me Adams Don't give us that shit Dan give us some real stuff

Yeah, yeah, makes it'll be like a couple of dudes one of whom is Billy Bob Thornton play golf and shit It's 10 cup I get it. Yeah, it's 10 cup. I get it. Just 10 cup. Come on. All right. Okay. There's no crying in this movie about a woman's baseball team during the war two. Is Jackie Chan in it? All right. Well, here we go. It's worth that's in the synopsis.

Next. Next. Next. Next,. Next movie. An old soldier kidnaps a young general of an enemy state and takes him on a long journey to collect the reward. An old soldier kidnaps a young general of an enemy state and takes him on a long journey to collect the reward. and take them in a long journey to collect the reward. I'm gonna say there's a Jackie Chan movie. I am also there's a lot of lot of possibilities for action and comedy.

Yeah, yeah, your correct. This is a Jackie Chan movie called Little Big Soldier of 2010. Oh, you're pulling out a fucking lot of new shit, dude. Yeah, well, I mean, the thing is like the older stuff all seems pretty obviously exactly the same. A drunken master Buyers that he has to... Video games. Video games.

Video games. You like them? Maybe you wish you had more time for them? Maybe you want to know the best ones to play? Maybe you want to know what happens to Mario when he dies? In that case, you should check out Triple Click. It's a podcast about video games. A podcast about video games, but I don't have time for that, sure you do. Once a week, kick back as three video game experts give you everything from critical

takes on the hottest new releases. To scoops interviews and explanations about how video games work. To fascinating ends, sometimes weird stories about the games we love. Triple Click is hosted by me, Kirk Hamilton, me Jason Shire, and me, Maddie Myers. You can find Triple click wherever you get your podcasts and listen at MaximumFun.org. Bye! Hi, I'm James, Host of Minority Corner, which is a podcast that's all about intersectionality. It's hosted by James with a guest host every week.

Discussing all sorts of wonderful issues, nerdy and political. Pop culture. Black queer feminism. Race, sexuality. News. You're gonna learn your history. They're self-empowerment.

And it's told by what feels like your best friend. Why should someone listen to minority corner? Why not? Oh my god, free stuff. There's not free stuff. The listeners of minority corner will enjoy some necessary LOL LOLs but mainly a look at what's happening in our world through a colorful lens. People will get the perspective of marginalized communities. I feel heard. I feel seen. Like you said, you need to understand how to be more proactive

in your community and this is a great way to get started. Join us every Friday on Max Fun or wherever you get your podcast. We're in the corner because together we're in the majority. This seems like an opportune time to talk about Stitch Fix. Wouldn't be great if every clothing store you shopped at had only your size what styles you like and at the price you want. Stitch Fix is a personal styling company that makes getting the clothes you love effortless. So get started, go to stitchfix.com slash flop house to set up your profile and they'll deliver great looks personalized just for you in your colors, styles and budget. You pay a $20 styling fee for each fix, which is credited toward anything you keep. Schedule it anytime, there's no subscription required, plus shipping returns

and exchanges are easy and free. Elliot, did you use StitchFix? Are you the one amongst us who are familiar with sticks picks? My wife used stitch picks for quite a long time and has been wanting to reassign up. She, when we were moving, she stopped her, paused hers for a little bit because she didn't wanna miss any. And she has to restart again.

But yeah, she was very happy with a lot of the clothes she got from stitch picks and wears them to this very day. I could kind of use a personal shopper. I feel like my clothing is basically like, I don't know, like a 14 year old boy who doesn't have parents around. Basically, I dress like the older brother

and don't tell mom the babysitters to head. You're the stylish one of all of us. I mean, like part of it is because you're the handsome one. So you can pull off any clothes. I get weird to wear but You get a lot of personal style. I I had personal style too, but it's you know at Junx English professor It's Wonderboys. Yeah, but hey if you're in my and my dressing style is usually what can I put on in the four minutes I have before a child bursts into the room and starts laughing at my penis?

Yeah Every it's like armor The greatest fear Contact and get started today at stitch fix.com. Sorry get started today. It sticks Sticks fit sticks fix you're way to get across the river sticks. Pixie sticks.com. Get started today at stitchfix.com slash flop house and you'll get to 25% off when you keep everything in your fix. That's stitchfix.com slash flop house for 25% off when you keep everything in your fix. Stitchfix.com slash flop house, they made me say it for ice.

It really killed me. Yeah, I mean, I was just amazed that you could get it out that many times with a I started seeing your head overheat a little bit while you're doing it and steams are shooting out your ears. Look, what I'm trying to, what I'm running too many programs on the laptop. Let's return to the game. Wait, steam shoots out of your ears, Stewart, when the laptop's running too many programs? Yeah, there's something because I get so mad at it. I'm like, stop it.

Slow down. So here's a, here's a movie for you and you can tell me whether Jackie Chan is ended or not. Sure. A Berspectacled Milk Toast Bookkeeper loves his pet fish so much that he longs to be one. When Henry's wish comes true and he's turned into a talking fish, no, the simple ocean life he'd envisioned proves more exciting than mundane. Dan, is that the incredible Mr. Limpet? That is the incredible Mr. Limpet. So there's no Jackie Chan. There's the American Jackie Chan Don Nots who never had the chance to show off his martial arts chops on film. Yeah. All right. Well, okay. This went a little but but if he reads the screenplay I'm sending him maybe will go on

uh Don not there's no longer making films for reasons we'll get into off the off the they should have made him one rivers and martial arts master and it's like he'll try you up in Don Nots is Mr. Nots. Stop quoting my screenplay. Okay, so this is the screenplay usually features the tagline from the poster. In the screenplay, yeah, that's right. This next one will surely stump you. Oh, speaking of taglines, I had to look at this stuff to work recently. Did you know Dr. Gagel's, they tried to have it both ways. They used both the doctor is in sane and the doctor is out recently. Did you know Dr. Gagel's, they tried to have it both ways. They used both, the doctor is in sane

and the doctor is out of his mind as taglines. Make up your mind, Dr. Gagel's, are you in or are you out? Yeah, yeah. Do they try and get both of those, what, copy written? And the copy right office is like, oh, I don't think so. Not so fast. It doesn't work. Also, there's a there's a cat in the hat TV show that my children like now and there's

a doctor on it called Dr. Gagels and I'm always like, no, don't go in there. Yeah, watch out. He's out of his mind. Yeah. Andy's insane. So in this movie, for relentless door to door salesmen deal with constant rejection, homesicknesses, homesickness, and inevitable burnout as they go across the country selling very expensive bibles to low-income Catholic families.

Okay, so this is salesmen, the documentary. The Maisel's Brothers documentary. The Mazzles Brothers documentary. And I was 69. As much as I would love it, if a young Jackie Chan showed up in the background at the, one of the conventions where the salesman me. There's Naria Jackie Chan to be found in salesman, the Mazzles Brothers, harrowing documentary. Okay, all right, all right, all right.

We're doing pretty good, Ellie. Yeah, we're doing pretty good. Excellent. Um, former CIA spy Bob Ho takes on his toughest assignment to date, looking after his girlfriends, three kids who haven't exactly warmed to their mom's bow. When one of the youngsters accidentally downloads a top secret formula Bob's long time nemesis a Russian terrorist pays a visit to the family. So that's the Jackie Chan movie. It's what like the spy next door or the spy sitter or something like that.

Yeah, that is the spy next door from 2010. I remember seeing the subway ads. That was during the period. Was that one where he's like hanging from, from like ropes? Oh, yeah. He's hanging from ropes, mission impossible style, and he's got a look on his face like, oh boy,

and the kids are looking at him like, what's his doofus doing? And then, it's kind of crazy how influential that one scene from De Palma's mission impossible. That's true. Yeah. Yeah. Really is true. Yeah. Yeah.

Really is true. Especially considering that like, I, like, it is definitely not the best Mission Impossible movie. It is not the best De Palma movie, but somehow like the two of them crossing together. It is the best. It is the best De Palma mission impossible movie though. You got to say that. You got to admit that.

It is true. Yeah. Brian De Palma's Mission Impossible 2 directed by John Woo was a little bit worse. I didn't say it was the worst. I just, but I, I mean, I feel like, despite the, the higher level of quality and all the, in the, in some of the other Mission Impossible movies, I don't think any of them have like one scene that was that iconic. No, the other movies, I mean the last three undeniably are far better than the first movies, but yeah, they don't have anything that, no matter how great the sequences are, there's like nothing in them that is quite as immediately iconic as that. Yeah. Just hit at the right

time. People were ready for a movie where a guy was suspended from something Yep Trying to keep his sweat off the floor Yeah, back in the 90s whenever was trying to keep their sweat off the floor That was 90s right or was that early? It was it was certainly the pre-skit era when sweat just dripped everywhere and no one cared anymore, you know Okay, so this next movie, it's a high kicking battle on the dark side when an ace vampire slayer and his beautiful side kicks wage the ultimate martial arts showdown

with one of the most dangerous of the undead. Dracula, I mean, what's- Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I don't, has Jackie Chan done any like vampire movies or monster movies? I'm trying to think of it. I can't I mean there's been monsters in some of his movies, but I don't

think this is Jackie. I don't think Jackie Chan's in this one. I don't think so either. I'm going to say no. This is not a Jackie Chan movie. Prove me wrong. I'm going to say no, this is not a Jackie Chan movie. Prove me wrong. This actually is a Jackie Chan movie. This is called The Twins Effect from 2003. 2003 is what we usually say. I'm going to run out and go, what's that shit? It sounds great.

You were making say it all the time. The Twins Effect. The Twins Effect. It's named after the baseball team. They find that fans of the Minnesota twins are turning into vampires. Yeah. Yeah. Wade Boggs is apparently the vampire. Can't wait, Yilla. Yeah, sure. Okay. Moving into the end game here, we're getting close closer. Avengers, Avengers Endgame. No, Jackie Chan is not in that.

Yeah. So this, we've got one, two, three, four, five movies left. We'll, we'll, we'll speed through them. Okay. A former, a former Vaudevillian befriends a young runaway who is being chased by drug dealers. A former Vodvilian, a young man who was chased by drug dealers. Sure, that's a Jackie Chan movie. What do you think, Elliot?

I'm going to say no, not a Jackie Chan movie. Okay, who got you at the point? It is not a Jackie Chan movie. This is just you and me, kid, from 1979 with the classic comedy team of George Burns and Brook Shields. A very young Brook Shields in this movie. I get George Burns and Jackie Chan confused all the time. You mentioned Oh God, you devil earlier, yeah. Yeah. confused. You mentioned oh god you devil earlier yeah yeah now you're saying Brook Shields doesn't play the old Vaudevillian and George Burns doesn't play the the young kid on the run from drug dealers I see what made me think

was I was like Jackie Chan wouldn't have been in like Vaudeville they didn't you know he came from you know the Chinese acrobatics and opera scene but you know I just assumed it was a mistake on the on the part of the person writing the description you know what I didn't even factor that in you're right I just assumed it was a mistake on the part of the person writing the description. You know what, I didn't even factor that in, you're right. I'd like to change my answer Dan and say it is a Jackie Chan movie. Well, does that change the results? Now you're both wrong.

Is it like the prisoners dilemma? And now you have to let us both go. No, you can't, you can't. Yeah, I think that's the only way you write that. So moving on, an agency. Is it like the Spanish prisoner where you're like, that's a cool movie and then you think about and you're like What was that movie about?

Yeah, is it like prisoners where you're like I? Think this is a good movie. It's really rainy It is very rainy more rain means better We're ancient and yeah and ancient American Indian burial ground is threatened by an evil real estate developer when the owner of the land who runs a local off road Jeep tour company has trouble with his business. His beautiful knees and her crew of beautiful friends take over the Jeep tours and attract business and save the day the old fashioned way by taking off their tops during the tours they're

leading. So I think Dan wrote this summary. And unless you're yes. Elliot, I'm really nervous that if we say Jackie Chan isn't in this, Dan's gonna blow our fucking minds. And turns out he was actually in the great bikini off road adventure. No, there's only one Asian character in the great bikini off road adventure. It is the tourist photographer who's obsessed with that one girl's boobs. I'm gonna, Jackie Chan is not in the great for Kenny Offroad Adventure, right Dan?

No, you're correct. That is the great for Kenny Offroad Adventure from 1994, but Jackie Chan is not in it. It's a bit much to say a crew of friends. There's only like three people, right? So one woman and two friends. When people ask me about the podcast, I'm like, yeah, me and the crew are doing it every two weeks.

Okay, just three more. When a rookie filmmaker with the unfortunate name, Alan Smithy realizes he's an unwitting studio puppet being forced to make big budget action movie. He knows is horrible. He steals the master reels and tries to make a deal. Okay, so that's Bern Hollywood burn starting Eric Idol, but is Jackie Chan in it? Right Dan, that's the movie. But it's not a movie I've seen. Different than the great bikini off road adventure, which apparently I've seen too many times

But I'm gonna sit There are celebrity cameos in that movie I think right? I don't think he's in it. Okay. I'm gonna say no. He's not in it Unfortunately Jackie Chan is in Allie's aullin's movie film Bern Hollywood burn. He's probably playing himself, right? Yes, he's playing Jackie Chan. Oh, okay. That was the loophole. He got us with a Chan hole.

Get him down to the wire. The original characters. Down to the wire. Wait, is this a timed match? I don't understand. Yeah, yeah. This is all right. Here's a synopsis. The original characters from the Cannonball Run race across the country once more in various cars and trucks. That's synopsis. In various, they're not all in one car.

The characters from the Cannonball Run race across the country once more in various cars and trucks now That's clearly Schindler's list, which I don't believe Jackie Chan is in That's cannonball run to guessing Which is Jackie Chan, right? Jackie Chan is in cannonball run to All right final question for the evening. Oh, when you said down to the wire, I thought that was the final question. No, just one more.

Stuart, this is going to be the part where Jackie Chan comes out. It's going to be amazing. The Jackie Chan, one of the legends of not just action films, but also comedy films, one of the true physical poets of the screen Me one of the biggest movie stories of all time the biggest movie stories of all time Richly deserving of the lifetime achievement Oscar that he got a few years ago You can draw a direct line from Buster Keaton through Fred Astaire Straight to Jackie Chan in terms of just being so in control of your own body and also seeing the potential in the objects around you as so in control of your own body and also seeing the potential in the objects around you as extensions of that body and things to both play and interact and dance and fight with.

So I cannot wait till this guy comes out and just like I'm going to say probably as complicated politics that I don't really understand because I'm both dumb and drunk. I mean, I mean, that's something that we need. I mean, he's not, he's not American, you know, he has his own perspective on things and he's had to work within a very specific filmmaking culture and political framework for quite some time. So Dan, with all that in mind,

please surprise us with Jack Chan. Hey, it's me, Jackie Chan, poet of the screen. So it's last movie. John has inherited a castle in Italy. And he moves there with his wife Susan and their blind daughter Rebecca. What they don't realize is that there's someone else in the castle. Yeah. An abused child left to die in the basement who has now become the castle freak and is that okay to wreak havoc One movie is okay now. There's no way of knowing that's not operation condor to no

No, that's not did wait Elliott. I wasn't paying attention to they say that the castle was in the Bronx No, and I but it did I don't believe it was in England. So it's probably not Shanghai nights Now they do they go to Italy and around the world in 80 days It's a good question I don't know does is there a Susan. I mean Jackie Chan is an often married in movies. He's in Michelle Yo, yeah, that I mean what a pair though. They're amazing. Yeah I'm kind of stumped guys I'm gonna say Jackie Chan is not in this movie. I'm gonna I'm gonna go with Stewart

I feel like he's probably got a sixth sense He said that was a plan. He was in the Yeah, that was that was that was a Haley Jackie Chan Osmond in the sense. Yeah, that was that was that was a Haley Jackie Chan osman in the success Your correct Jackie Chan is not in the movie that is of course Castle freak from Right See in the movie

So you guys did pretty well overall you got a full 13 out of 17 questions correct. Yeah. Did you tell us that you split, cancel each other's albums. Did you count that first point we got before the game started? Oh, okay. So well then you got 14 out of 17 with that bonus. So you know your Jackie Chan and the thing is, I got to say say I had this premise. I thought I was pretty funny Yeah, go on Audrey actually suggested this to me. I'm like yes, I'm doing it is happening and then I started looking into it and

It's pretty obvious what movie Guys, unless I wanted to be really boring and just describe a bunch of Kung Fu movies, like you're going to get whether Jackie Chan's in the movie. Yeah. But, but look, we all had fun here tonight. We could make a home game of this and deal with some rice ronie, the San Francisco treat. I mean, usually you don't, you don't get rice ronie for winning the home game. But, you know, now, now Dan, why, why do you feel the need to apologize for the game? I thought it was pretty fun. Yeah, like they need to justify what we did tonight. Yeah, do you think team night Harvey comes out on family feud and he's like, that was fun, right, guys? No, I don't feel the need. At the end of every, at the end of every Jeopardy Alex Trebek

comes out and goes like, you enjoyed yourself, didn't you? I mean, was this, this wasn't a waste of your time, right? I don't feel the need, but it is, I did think it was interesting to see the conceptual curve, let's say, of this premise, where I was just like, oh, this is a fun premise. Let's see what happens. Can I actually fool them? Oh, no, I have to lean into the fact that there's no way to fool you. I mean, there's a couple that we didn't know about that vampire one, right?

Yeah, it's true. Yeah, we didn't know that one. Yeah. We thought Jackie Chan might have been in first or formed. Remember when we made that mess up? That would have been a very classic movie. Now, what would happen if you took all Ethan Hawke out of all of his movies and put Jackie Chan in? Jackie Chan's in Dattica Jackie Chan's in before midnight. Jackie Chan's in daybreakers. Jackie Chan's in boyhood. I don't know that that one would change that much, but that would have been really awesome. Yeah, I like I think that you know it is either good or a lateral but different move like

a wildly different move to put a bridge in the other but yeah, exactly. Well, we'll see. They bring different skill sets is what I'm trying to say. Well, this is your mission now. So make it happen. All right. Well, guys, that was, uh, was Jackie Chan of this movie. As always, you know, right in see if you can get a copy of the home game. Um, yeah, I appreciate that you guys went along with me on this nonsense road. And we'll be back

with a normal show next week. But until then I've been Dan McCoy I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Ellie Kalen before we go I just want to remind everybody that we have our live show on October 24th on the Flophouse YouTube page that's 6 p.m. Pacific time 9 p.m. Eastern on October 24th one week before Halloween Where we will be talking live and doing presentations and stuff for charity as we did with the Howard the Duck show this time it is the extra-since part two the heretic and that should be a lot of fun. Yeah and people who contribute to charities that are listed on our website will be entered into a drawing for

some fun flop-ass merch and some cool prizes and stuff. So join us for that, but until then, I'm Elliot Kaylen and not Jackie Chan or am I? Oh, I can't believe he did that. Good night everyone. Maximumfund.org Comedy and Culture Artist-owned audience supported. Maximumfund.org.

Comedy and Culture. Artist-owned, audience supported.