The Flop House - FH Mini 2: Working Weak

Episode Date: February 22, 2020

In this minisode we take on the topic of jobs in movies. If you want to dictate a future minisode, tweet at us @theflophousepod.

Hey and welcome to the Flophouse Mini. The new thing we're trying, kind of a little flop house snack in between full episodes. We're still kind of figuring out what it is, although one thing that it might be is people on Twitter suggesting topics to us. Not so much questions like on letters, but just sort of something maybe they want us to talk about. And so if you're interested in that tweet at us at the Flapphouse pod. Yeah. That's correct. This time there's a Twitter user whose name is Chris Larson. He untouched and he said, can you look at why movies do not understand basic jobs? Actually, he said, next, can you look at why movie do not understand basic jobs? Wow. he said next can you look at why movie do not understand basic jobs?

Wow, so that's singular. I don't know if he means a specific movie. Chris, you got to be more specific. I asked him when any particular jobs movies you have in mind and he said office work and retail. And something you see a lot in movies is people who work in stores or offices not really doing a lot of work but having kind of endless time off. And the one that struck out to me was Empire Records, the movie where this record store of which is enormous, it's a huge store and it employs a small army of teens and they spend most of their time hanging out on the roof flirting with each other. Yeah, or like they dance at one point for a lot of time. And they are going actually it makes a lot of sense. They are going out of business

and you're like yeah fire some of these kids are not working. actually, it makes a lot of sense. They are going into business and you're like, yeah, fire some of these kids, they're not working. Yeah, they're gonna be replaced by what, I guess the point is like it's a soulless corporate job. And I think that they're all angry that this job will make them actually work. I think that's kind of the implication of why they don't want to be replaced. Yeah, they're kind of like a lost boys thing.

They never want to grow up. Yeah. I mean, office jobs and movies I think that the the thing about them is they just are always the least specific and most vague about what's going on They're like oh, I you have to finish the Jenkins file this weekend I've got the big file I need to work on or like the big presentation and it's yeah I've got a land the course and account Yeah, and and what and what is that is that a company that makes shoes Children's jumpers or do they make medical supplies or is that a person or is that a city that you have to go to

Explain more movie, but yeah, they also have to make presentations and the presentations are often about marketing I guess yeah I mean what I find more than I to make presentations and the presentations are often about marketing, I guess. Yeah. I mean, what I find more than, I hate to sort of steer it in a different direction than this topic we've been given. But what I find more in movies is like movies seem very focused on a small pool of jobs. Like everyone's either in architect

or they work at a magazine or they work in publishing in general. And think they're in advertising a lot a lot of advertising people in the movies and I think this is because sometimes they're American ninjas yeah yeah and often they're they're hitman or mercenaries or or ghostbusters well okay let's put those aside for a moment the ones that I'm talking about it's like it's like I saw a movie once about space cowboys, and it was like, this movie does not understand what it's like to be a space cowboy at all.

They barely let, less sued any asteroids. But no, what I wanna say is like, screenwriters, I think because they work in a creative field, they think that the only important work is work that is creative. And so they have these sort of like glamour industries like publishing that they know that people understand enough that they will get what this person's job is,

but don't understand enough about that they actually have to do any research to make it accurate. Oh, maybe. It's like how all John Carpenter's characters are like, you know, on an Arctic base or in a little church, researching the devil or Mars or they're a team of Vatican vampire killers. Best job. How do you get that job as a Vatican, Vatican vampire? Yeah, you got to go to school for it, right? I mean I you got to do an internship right or have a really strong recommendation. James Woods a priest in that movie

Yes, I think he is so I guess that you get that job by being like a priest that's just too bad ass for like normal services Yeah, yeah, yeah, if you wear jeans too often to mass So so so the so what you're saying here, the implications that James Woods was a regular priest with a parish and everything. Yeah. And he was just too, they were getting, the Vatican was getting complaints. They were like, our local priest is too bad ass. Yeah, he has got too much leather on. Yeah, yeah, too. And which is a big thing because leather is sinful, I guess. Yeah, they're like, this is a Ramstein concert too. You can't wear a black leather casak everywhere you go.

And so the Pope probably called him in and was like, James Woods, can you come into my office, please say it in a funnier accent. Well, which Pope is it? Is that the current Pope? Is it Pope Benedict? This would have been when John Paul II was still Pope. So he's got a Polish accent, which I can't really do, but I'll just do a general Eastern European. It's like, James Fludes, James Fludes, I'll come into my office. Oh, please.

And he's also Dracula. That's the ironic thing, is it turns out the end that the Pope is the big thing? Which kind of... Which is the twist at the end of vampires, is it turns out one of the priests is a vampire But and it also I mean that's a highly critical take on the on the Catholic Church So I don't say I disagree with it. So so so the Pope is like hey James a woods a come on in I'm just gonna make him Italians

Yeah, I mean that's my philosophy like even though the last several popes have not been Italian like a comical Italian accent Is the best one for a pope? Okay, so let's go with it. So how about I'll be the pope and Stuart Iracool, dude, you be James Woods and Dan, you be the guy who's there because he made the complaint about James Woods, okay. James Woods, I come in a two-mile, my holy office, I got a complaint here from a parishioner. Hey, do I have to sit down or can I just stay

next to this jute box? See, this is a kind of thing that I'm worried about because you know, he brought this jute box with him to the Vatican. And that's the kind of stuff he's been pulling in math. Well, no, the real problem is that that is a Vatican a jute box, but it goes in the rec room where the Pope has his break and he moved it into this office which I do not appreciate. And I took out all the church music and just put in a single of the song, Taken Cara Business. Which again is a rock and song but it's not appropriate really for this one because Taken Cara Business is about earthly things and we're supposed to be about the spiritual things. But you Dan McCoy, same name because again you could be Catholic with that name. Dan McCoy, can you talk, speak to why are you unhappy about a father woods?

Well, I mean number one he do talk about my politics. Well, yeah, that's a big problem. I have with James Woods the person, but The Pope would be like the Pope would be like no, he's a dead straight on that. That's a good stuff. Okay. That's a good boss. Continue. And when I say that's a good boss, I'm talking to God, of course. These are my boss. I got to talk to my boss too. Look, we all, each of us, we got the people we work for. So continue, Dan. So my problem with this priest, among other things is he pulls out an electric guitar

in the middle of mass and does some hot licks. And we all know that when you have a guitar and mass, it should be an acoustic guitar singing songs and no one wants to hear. And also, you know, he just, you know, he takes a little swig at tequila every once in a guitar and mass, it should be an acoustic guitar, singing songs and all the ones to hear. And also, you know, he just, you know, he takes a little swig at Tequila every once in a while instead of communion wine. Every time I give a sermon, I look out into the audience and I look for the one person who's not getting off and then I make sure I get them off. Yeah, usually worse like get off in churches, but one of my major problems.

I will say none of this is a strictly by the Vatican a handbook Let's take a if you guys could it James if you have your copy of the handbook with you as you're supposed to have at all times I used all the pages to rule up and make doobies Okay, now again, that's a friend. That's an infraction not so much of the doobies, but mutilating book. Yeah, also one of my pro- He's a holy text, so you know, you gotta treat it with respect. One of my problems with this priest too is, he's cool, but he's kind of a generic cool guy,

who just likes cool guy stuff. So you want a little bit of more specificity? Yeah, maybe not. Okay, well, so I also took that book and I cut out a thing in the center, so so I could hide my vampire slaying pistol in it. Okay. That's pretty good Okay, now that this is something I want to talk to you about because fire's little bullets filled with holy water I appreciate that you're still a priest even though you seem to be not that interested in other religion part of it but uh we do have a we do have a for a priest who's kind of like a bad ass

and and has an interest in a fighting the vampiros. So how would you like to join my secret vampire group? Now Dan McCoy you're not supposed to know about this is just a regular lay catalyst. So maybe cover you years. Oh no it's fine I haven't paying attention to the last few minutes of the camera. Oh that's a good. I just gotta let you know that I only work alone. I just gotta let you know that I only work alone Okay, that's your werewolf Well, I guess I'm part of that I guess I could be I mean I can learn you will help me get the job. No, no It's it's not really necessary. I was just thinking of werewolf sometimes the head of empire is anyway

But we also don't like a werewolves, you know It's it's not a situation where we're happy with either side of the underworld battle. Where whoever wins, we lose, you know? Like I also know how to use Slack. I wrote that down, but I'd tone. I can learn it over the weekend if you're up in the gig. I mean, that was one of the reasons I want to talk to you as I needed someone who understood how to use Slack

because we want to have a better team cohesion and communication. But even though I keep trying to get the cardinals on a Slack, but they keep using their trying to get the cardinals on a slack, but they keep using their emails to communicate with each other about the vampires. So, such a waste of time. I hope they are not listening, because again, you're not supposed to know about vampires. Wait, are you a vampire? Like, culturally or? No, I mean, like, well, I guess so yes. I do as any of your heritage of vampires. I mean culturally I am a vampire I don't like wine or garlic But no, I have not been bitten by a member of the undead

So how did you get into the vampire lifestyle? It's a strange thing to be a culture vampire but a religiously Catholic Well, I mean, okay, I honestly I but a religiously Catholic. Well, I mean, okay, I honestly, I lied before. I do like girl looking white quite a bit, but what I, but I'm into is the... You're telling me, I'm getting a lot of mixed messages from you, too. You know, you know, you know,

it may be a father of words who seems like a pretty cool guy, maybe a good vampire hunter. He's not so bad. I think maybe you're the problem. I just like capes and cowls, you know, so I feel like so. I feel like a classic fit move. So anyway, this has been very useful, I think, talking about.

Speaking of things that don't get jobs, right? I've been watching my wife and I watch a lot of TV together, and one of the shows we've been watching lately is Stump Town on some TV. So you don't think TV channel. It gets being an unlicensed private investor. It feels like every single episode, they introduce like a private investigation situation,

involving a different profession, and they're always wrong. Yeah. Like they get the bar stuff wrong, restaurant stuff wrong. There's a stripper situation that gets that they get wrong. Like everything, like it feels like they've done no research whatsoever, or they've only watched, like, they've only watched cop shows to give them information on how, like, crime works. Yeah. That is one thing I love about crime shows

is there's, like, always a stock group of plots that they have. Like, because there's so many of them, they just have to have, like, okay, this one is gonna be the one that happens as part of like a BDSM, like underground kink scene. Like we gotta have that one. So we gotta interview a guy that works there. And while we're interviewing him, he'll be drawing out his BDSM clothes.

I'm gonna close one. That's okay, wait, we're sliding into John Malini's Law and Order routine. We can't, we can't, we can't, it's a free slope to get to that routine, but we got it. We can't allow ourselves to do that. But I think I think we answered the question

of movies and jobs on this one. Yeah. One last thought. If you want to see a movie that gets my job and Alex former job totally wrong, watch that late night movie with Emma Thompson, Mindy Kaling. Wait, wait, wait, wait, bad.

Okay. Okay, the movie, totally wrong about late night comedy writing. All right, well, I'll tell Mindy that you said that. Yeah, I'll see her. And your friend Emma. Yeah, yeah, yeah, my friend, well, not Emma Thompson, but I have another friend named Emma, and I'll just tell her.

Yeah, the Jane Austen heroin. Yeah, yeah, yeah, my friend. Well, not Emma Thompson, but I have another friend named Emma, and I'll just tell her. Yeah, the Jane Austen heroin. Yeah, yeah, exactly. She's a, when she's not busy matching people up all the time when we, she, we need to realize she's the one who needs to find love in her life. And she does Emma starring Emma herself. Okay, well, I, I will stop interrupting Ellie when he's trying to end the show. And let's end the show. Let's do it. So thank you for your, your topic. If anyone else would like to suggest a topic for us to talk about in a flop house mini, please just tweet at the flop house pod and we'll probably talk around the issue in some way. And I apologize for my Italian accent that was unfortunate. Goodbye. Bye! Bye!

Hey everyone, it's I, John, Hodgman of the Judge John Hodgman podcast. And I, Elliot Kaelin of the Flop House podcast. And we've made a whole new podcast, a 12 episode special mini series called I Podius, in which we recap, discuss and explore the very famous 1976 BBC miniseries about ancient Rome called I-Clautius. We've got incredible guests such as Gillian Jacobs, Paul F. Tompkins, as well as star of I-Clautius, Sir Patrick

Stewart, and his son, non-Sir Daniel Stewart. Don't worry, Daniel, get there someday. iPodius is the name of the show. Every week for MaximumFund.org for only 12 weeks. Get him at MaximumFund.org or wherever you get your podcasts. Artists owned. Audience supported.