The Flop House - FH Mini 82 – Tuboy Talkin' Tube to 2 Dudes Today, Yes Way 2

Episode Date: June 10, 2023

It's exactly what it says in the title. What could possibly be clearer?Donate to the Entertainment Community Fund here, to support those affected by the WGA strike, if you’re so inclined.Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping.

Hey there, clear out those earholes because we've got another flop house mini for you to stick in your ear holes. Clear amount to stick something else in. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You make space for this. Yeah, clear out, make some room. Okay, so this is a flop house mini. It's a mini episode of the normally long flop house podcast where we watch a bad movie and talk about, but

instead on one of these minis, we're going to spend slightly less time talking about whatever we want. And tonight we're going to be talking about, we're going to be doing another episode of one of my favorite and one of your favorite shows. That's right. We're doing a little bit of two boy talking tube to two dudes today. Yes way. Okay. Okay. Indeed. Dan has given you verbal consent to appear in this many.

So two, if this is your first time checking out one of these episodes, two boy talking tube to two dudes today. Yes way. It's where me, Stewart aka two boy is going to be talking about tube. That's right. Television to two dudes, which two, these two Dan and Elliott. Okay. And we're doing it during the day because we recorded this one during the day and set up tonight. And yes, way because we need some confirmation here. We need some excitement. So before we get into the meat of this sandwich, while we're still on top of the bread, hang on the bread. We're on top

of the bread or in the bread. This represents the bread or we still on top of the bread. He's hanging on the bread. Hang on top of the bread or in the bread. This represents the bread or we're on top of the bread. We're on top of the bread. This is like a magic. Imagine the bread looking down on the meat. And the only thing I've got is some fast shit. What are you? Weird alien.

They call him Speed Allie, Incabic. He's even faster than weirdo. Yeah. So like imagine they call it weird speed levich because the big levage is a weird guy. The songs aren't quite as polished or funny perhaps, but what do you want? I did him right away. Yeah. Yeah, you can have it fast, good, or what's the other possible that you have control for

cheap. And we got you got a fast and cheap. This reminds me of dance. It's like me. Live in live in La Vida, Roku, which had no lyrics. Yeah, I gave up. I mean, the video's just the fucking Roku city backdrop. Well, real quick while we're still on top of the bread of the sandwich. I forgot where we were. Thank you for me establishing that. Yeah, it's on the season.

Thank you for preparing my look at you on a sandwich. So it's turned on. Yeah, so yeah, yeah. Look at you. Look at you. I'm looking at a picture of a sandwich. It says you are here and it's pointing to the top of the bread, right?

So before we get into this sandwich, I just want to point out real quick that again, we're going to be talking about television and what is essential to television. That's right. Writers, writers of the one who write it and they're currently on to write. Now I'm not a member of the WGA, however, I'd like to consider myself an ally. And these dudes are, so please, LA, I'm sure we're going to talk about a little bit more and we'll talk briefly about how you can support the writers, the right the shows that you love. And I love to because that's what we're talking about today. We're talking to you

with two dudes and me. So guys, we are right in the middle, we're recording this in the middle of the week when a bunch of series funnallies are coming out. That's right. The series finale, four succession dropped. The series finale, a berry dropped. The series finale for Mrs. Maisel dropped. I think the season series finale of Ted Lasso dropped. Yeah. And it was all one big crossover. That was the amazing thing. You had to watch all of them. It was, yeah, if you don't watch him all, you're only getting half the story. Yeah. So what I want to talk about now, guys, talk about now guys, this is going to require a little bit of work. So I hope you weren't playing it on kicking up your heels and cooling out.

Well, I can't cool out without kicking in my heels. No, you can't cool out or kick a heel. So you have to commit to doing the zero. You got to heat up and punch down those heels. So we are not going to be spoiling any of the series finalies that we have already mentioned. Not the least of which because I haven't watched any of them and don't know if I'm going to watch any of them.

Well, you're, well, the potential one is true. Then it seems like you shouldn't care about spoilers. Yeah, then you should, you should look them up. You should be like the way I handled the later seasons, uh, well, most of the seasons of Game of Thrones. Yeah. Just by reading, yeah, by reading spoilery reviews because I'm like, I don't want some rando telling me what happened on Game of Thrones. The books aren't even out yet. I don't know what's going to happen. You want a fronto telling you what happened on Game of Thrones?

I would love a ronto to tell me. And then John will all love it. It was probably not. Okay. So be sure. I mentioned there's some, I mentioned there's some, there's some cut scene from the special edition where the ronto turns the camera and says it's a living and then poops on someone and it fell over. Poops into another dinosaur.

No, aliens mouth and the aliens like it's a living and then it puts a different aliens mouth and I'm like, oh my god. And that last day, it po in a different aliens mouth and I'm like, oh my God. That's how it went into the bottom realm. It poops into another aliens mouth. Not alien. Turn up to Cameron says, I do it for pleasure. Yeah. I pay for this.

That they're the ones. Yeah. I'm not worried folks at the end of the side of the beach. There's nothing but happiness. Yeah. So this even said a be is 30% satisfied. We're going to do a little little exercise here since I'm with two professional writers.

What I would like, what I want to do today, not a lot of exercise in that profession. We are going to, we are going to describe what happens on the series finale of one of your favorite series finale. So I'm sure you have a couple in your head. And I want you to describe it in a way that is as non-spoileries possible. However, we don't want to cross over into the what happens next week on Mad Men line, where it's just people opening doors and closing doors and you're like, I have no fucking idea what could be happening. I know that this next episode, someone is gonna enter someone else's office and close the door of that office,

but I don't know the context of it. So you don't wanna go all the way to do that. So for instance, I'll start, since this is a little bit of a game, except the, let's see how well I can do here. Okay. So I'm gonna pick one of my favorite series finales, something my wife and I enjoyed was the shield.

Okay. And the shield spent most of the run with bad boy cop, Vic Mackie, played by Michael Chichlis. That's right. The Cump Mish and his buddy Shane, played by that's right. Walton Goggins, getting into all kinds of trouble and doing things that are quite unbecoming of an officer of the law or so you would think. And so the war of vice principle for that matter or a vice principle or a righteous gemstone or a boy. And I guess kind of

what you'd expect a boy crowded. Yeah, I don't expect boy to crowd or to be following the rules, yeah. So let's see, I'm gonna say in the series finale of the shield, I can't give anything away. Let's see, characters that we know. Mm-hmm. Okay. Face some consequences for their actions. Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh- shows. So that some people end up disappointed.

That's it. Okay, just how did I do? Did you guys did I ruin it for you? I think you did a good job of not spoiling it for me. You did a good job of giving me a sense of how you felt about the serious finale. How did you feel about it? Were you one of those people who were disappointed? Okay, no, no, no, I wasn't. It's one of my favorites. So let's see. It surprised me and was harsh.

Okay. Is that okay? Okay. And was harsh. OK. OK. Is that OK? OK. And what do you score it on the, on the fanali meter? What are the, what are the criteria on the fanali meter? There's two criteria.

Audience satisfaction and closure, sense of closure. OK. So I would say, I would say high on both. OK. OK. That's good. Okay. So the the shield you have a lot of seasons and depending on what your emotional state is, some of those seasons are going to be difficult. It is a show that when I started it, I was like, I don't know if I want to see another show that glorifies the police. And then after watching a bit of it, I'm like, oh, this show does the opposite of that. It really radicalized you.

Yeah. That was, that was the thing. Sorry, I was only out because I was thinking about, you know, having to, having to do this. Yeah, yeah, having to, yeah, I'm not judging you. I'm not judging you. I'll go up. I'll go up. I'll go back to it.

If you want me to go next, you can zone out a little bit more. No, no, no, I was only happy because I'll go. I mean, if you want me to go next week and so now a little bit more. No, no, I know I saw that because I have one. Oh, okay. So I'm going to go with Buffy the vampire slayer because it's a it's a finale that I think I can remember pretty well even though obviously the rules of this game don't really require you to remember. It could hurt me if anything. A show obviously that's become a little harder to watch now that we know more about Joss Whedon, but as Chris Macarpeter, who's great on Twitter, has pointed out. No spoilers about Josh Whedon's alleged horrible behavior. Yeah, my spoiler is there's no age to say. What? As Chris Macarpeter.

At least there's one in Weiden, right? LA, it's going to have to get that tattoo fixed, who is a delight on Twitter has said, you know, it's a show that is much bigger than one person. And sometimes, you know, things get lost. The artistic contributions of other people get lost when, unfortunately, the person has- Yeah, you're saying the same thing about the consp Cosby show turns out to be a weasel. I mean, that's true. Cosby is a monster.

But anyway, I would say to swerve away from that line of, it is a common thing, especially in today's idea of our tour driven TV, It is a common thing to not recognize the contributions of not just the other writers on staff, because not like Joss Weiden wrote every episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but also the many people involved in its creative work from the directors, to the editors, the performers, to the crew, to people who just, through their technical work, are the people operating the cameras, operating the sound equipment, people doing the crew, to people who just who through their technical work are the people operating the cameras operating the sound equipment people doing the makeup everyone involved has a contribution that they're making to it and a valuable contribution at that and it is because of that partly in order to protect that creative industry and those contributions the rare skills on strike we need to talk about that right now, but I did want to say this is a good opportunity, a good opening just to recognize that. This idea of one person being behind it all has always been a fiction in film for a long time, and it's a new fiction in television, but it is a fiction for both. It takes a lot of people to do these things, and all of them are necessary. Dan, tell us about the end of Buffy the Vampire Killer.

the end of Buffy the Vampire Killer. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. You know, as we know, our titular vampire slayer is still out there fighting evil. Okay. And we knew that. And the finale just as has been true for the previous seasons, Finale's. The big bad, the fight with them, it comes to a head. Okay. Okay. Something happens that changes, alters the slayer, mythos.

Okay. Going going forward, I guess, into the comics. Yeah. Certain people perhaps are lost along the way. Okay. All of them forever. Question mark. Okay. So even that sentence wasn't spoiled. And things generally end on a cheerful note. Okay. And now tell us about the comics. The comics were not very good. They were sold to me as a direct continuation of the show, but the show honestly, as much as I love it, had been in a slight creative decline after season five, season six, season six, season two, week is seven. That's not too bad. One for each deadly sin.

No, that's how they did it. I can assume. It's, you know, the comics were fine, but not so much that I didn't give up after a certain point. All right. Well, that was less funny than I thought the answer might be. So never mind. Okay. So where do we, yeah, where do you rate this finale on those two, on the finale meter?

It's a pretty satisfying finale. It doesn't, as I said, I think that the show kind of went downhill towards the end. So it could not go out on top like some of the best finales, but I give it like a seven. Okay. Oh, the same number as CZ said, deadly sins, yeah. Wow. Okay. Okay. And yeah, I guess there's not too many spoilers there. Okay. Okay. And, uh, yeah, I guess there's not too many spoilers there.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Let's do it. I didn't think it was going to be possible for me to have less of an idea of what happens than in story summary. And yet, you did it, Dan. You did it.

Man, we're killing it today. Yeah. Okay, Elliot. Why don't we, uh, want to, want to, want you to jump in this game. All right. Now, I'm going to jump it. Now, the first show that came to mind was one of my favorite shows, The Prisoner. And yet, I already did a podcast where I talked about that finale with John Hodgman.

It's called Be Podding You and It's Available on Maximum Fun. So go listen to that. It's a four episode podcast, many series. And so then I started thinking about what's another show I liked more recently. And a show I really was a big fan of was Hannibal. The show all about serial killers and cannibals and conversations. He's a cannibal. Oh, sorry, spoiler. And conversations made out of loaded questions. And arranging corpses and artistic tabloes. A raging corpses. The show that was that was as broken its visuals as it was erotic in its atmosphere. And in the season finale,

so serious finale, this was the third season I believe. And I have to admit that season, I was not as huge a fan of. They took a long time adapting Richard Harris's actual Hannibal novels for a while. And as much as I loved every moment when like a drop of blood would fall into a bathtub and you just follow that drop as it spiraled on down and was dissolved, I wasn't enjoying the story that much. And there were certain points where it was like, wait, so there's like electric eels

or in his butt or something, but I just couldn't crap my mind around. I couldn't wrap quite, I couldn't crap, I couldn't wrap my mind around. As soon as I couldn't crap my mind around, did I go to do that any there? But I thought that the season really picked up as the final, the end story was, I forget if it was an adaptation, I think it was an adaptation of Red Dragon, I can't remember.

But the, but at the end. I think that has been adapted into other, into move, and moved out. And I think is up there with the, but I think that has been adapted in two other, hasn't been adapted to two other times. And I think is, I think is up there with the, it was adapted as man hunter and then as the movie Red Dragon. It's better than the movie Red Dragon. And I think by far, by far and I'm up there with man hunter in a lot of ways.

Yeah, that's up there. I mean, there's, for me, that, you know, there's nobody who can beat Tom Noonan as a super scary dude. But still, as Richard Armitage is not bad, especially when you consider the for me that, you know, there's nobody who can be Tom Noonan as a super scary dude, but still. Richard Armitage is not bad, especially when you consider that he was a dwarf. Yeah, and also, I'm, you know, I'm a 40-something-year-old man. If you show me manhunter and I'm just going to go into like the synth wave, like, pleasure-gold, just like neon and, you know, I don't know, just blue lights everywhere.

So speaking of synth, I was watching Simpson's episodes with my older son, which he hasn't seen for a while. We watched the Mr. Plow episode, and there's a part where Homer is driving his plow against across a rope bridge, and the music, and it's like the scene in Sorcerer, and the music is all synthy, and I was like, oh, now I understand this joke.

Because when this ever stared when I was like 11, I did had not seen Sorcerer. I was not familiar with it. And your parents didn't take you as an explainer. Yeah, yeah. It was like, wait just a few. I was like, it's like, wait just a fear of it. Like, why the music? I don't understand. Cluzo wasn't working with, with synth in his, in his outtracks. Yeah. So, uh, I'm gonna, but, uh, let's see, let's

describe this, uh, this ending to this series finale. Okay. So there's a, uh, there's a disagreement between our main characters, the between our, between our main characters and our not main character, but recurring character. The two main characters find both common ground and also disagreement. There is a very memorable hug and Gillian Anderson prepares a meal for someone. And that's the series finale. Yeah, okay, I feel like I feel like Ellie, it got a little more detail in his than we got to ours, but yeah, but it's still pretty vague. You don't know what the context of the hug is. And you don't know who, Jillian understands preparing the meal for what she's preparing.

Yeah. Okay. Well, that was fun, guys. Series finalists. You got to love them. Okay. Good. Take away. Okay.

So the, the next part of this little episode, I want to talk about a thing I started watching recently because I'm very excited about it. I just started watching the new Dead Ringer's show, which is of course adapted from the David Kronenberg movie. And I have another little deadly game for the two of you. I would like the two of you to collaborate on a pitch for me. Can you pitch for me a TV reimagining of a David Kronenberg that twists it in a way that makes it appropriate for my modern eyeballs.

I mean, it would be, honestly, would be to tone it down probably. I feel like, I got away with a lot of the 70s and 80s. So Dan, okay, let's talk about what Cronenberg were, were adapting. I mean, it feels like the easy way to go and I don't want to go that way. It would be a history of violence. I don't want to go that way. Okay. Too easy history of violence. I don't want to go that way. Okay. Too easy. I feel like if you want to take it easy on yourself, you pick any of those last those

three movies. Except for spider spider would not be easy one to adapt to. No, also. I'm going to be the dead. The dead zone would be too easy and has already been adapted. I feel like scanners. I think what scanners may have been a television show all sweat some way, wasn't it? Scanners feels like it would be pretty easily adapted in a TV show. Yeah. There's good guy bad guy psychics. They're making

each other's heads blow up. Everyone's wearing puffy vests over flannel shirts. Yeah, that may that's TV show already. So, so let's say, so what's a what's a hard one? The fly would be. Video drone. Now, let's talk about video drone. But how do you want to twist it? Because well, the thing is video drone is take already about the television medium.

So that's why I think let's try to do a TV show out of that. Okay, so video drum. Here's one twist. James Woods will not be the star of this. Well, I mean, I think often is the case. Not like Jeremy Irons is in the dead ringers. To true. Yeah. Well, I mean, I think often is the case, not like Jeremy Irons is in the dead ringers uh, teachers. True.

Yeah. Instead, they do the smartest thing a TV show it can do and they cast Rachel vice and she plays two characters. Yeah. They're very twice the vice. That was how they had it. They are pretty much they said dead ringers twice the vice. This time our vice is twice and people were like, oh, fantastic.

They also tried, they also tried, they had the double rainbow guy, double rainbow guy on the commercial wing, double Rachel. What does it mean? And that did not test as well that advertisement. Now, here's the problem. Okay. That I foresee for us with video drone. Okay. Because if you're going to modernize it, right? I feel like it has to be, you know, internet streaming something like that. That's right.

That is the feeling that is destroying our industry. Yes, streaming. Sure. But that, but the thing is, I guess I fear, I fear to tread there because there have been so many bad horror movies about the internet. Like, I feel like you're right. And it's impossible to make art about the internet. I feel like you're right Dan. It's impossible to make hard about the internet and it's good. Can you believe this guy? Wait, I'm looking to the audience. I'm doing like a John C. to the office. Look to the audience. I'm saying that like there's been good horror movies about the internet. The fucking social network dude. People have, yeah, probably one of the best people have tried so hard to be like, what is scary about

the internet? And the thing is, like, the internet is scary and get the movies somehow not being able to figure it out. So, here's the thing, because I think they mistake the, what's the medium for the message. If I can be like, Marshall McClellan, a character in video drum of whom is based on the character of the Ryan Oblivion, right? So I think the scary thing about the internet is that it plays on your deepest, what, insecurities and privacy and fears

and can alternately project them to the world or directly to you feed the things that are gonna drive you mad. And instead, what the movies have mainly said is the internet is creepy because there might be serial killers who are lurking on you, or Smiley's, whereas it feels like with video drama, it gives you the opportunity to do something scary about algorithms, or something scary about the way social media is designed to make you mad or to make you

paranoid. So I think there's things you could do with that. Well, I think there's an uncertainty quality to what video drone is doing. He doesn't really know what these transmissions are, how seriously to take them in a certain way. I think that there's something interesting with that too with the internet with people who claim to just be trolls and you can't tell whether they are just trolls, whether they are legitimately dangerous or whether there's any difference between those two.

Yeah, yeah. I love that. That's a great, gray area to play in, is that that paranoia of not knowing what's a real danger and what's a fake danger, what's sincere and what's not sincere. And you can't escape it because the devices that you use to run your life are pushing these things at you constantly. You have to opt out of all of it. And these devices are essential.

You can't, it's came to the point where you can't even get on the subway without scanning your fucking phone. Yeah, which is crazy. Like it's really, it's, it's, it's bought, or when people talk about like, well, we need a cashless society. And it's like, wait, so I need,

you're saying I need to have a device with me at all times. Like I can't opt out of even having a device. So that, I think that's really good. And the first one, the video drama movie is so much about the difference between image and reality and what happens when you confuse them. So this can be similar. The idea of confusing the virtual world for the real world, not in a virtuality.

Somebody comes out of a video game and is killing people in real life. So no serial killers. Well, not necessarily, but probably not, but the idea of that there are companies out there in reality that want to create a virtual world, that then we would have to spend all of our time in, so that they can not only control the products or the content or whatever that we get, but also control the very reality that we live in in a way that they own and they have to sell to us, which is a really frightening idea, right? Maybe that's an idea.

Maybe like, someone notices like targeted stuff, you know, being more and more specifically targeted towards them gets paranoid about it. And then like things start to fall into place in their life in a way that should be positive, but they are paranoid that this is like somehow these companies are now tailoring reality to his whims as well. It could be. Yeah, I mean, in a way that we don't want it to be too much like the matrix or something like that, but I like that idea a lot. That's really good. So it's like he's,

he's, he's from the, he's already in the, he's already in that world or something like that, that he, he uh, there's a, we'll figure it out. So anyways, Stewart, that's the pitch. You like it? Okay, I'm putting it 10 episode, uh. Ten episode run, let's put it on. Freeform. Okay. You can't see it at home, but look down as if to check his nose as if he has a deal in place with freeform. Yes, Stewart has an overall with freeform, yeah.

Okay, this is a great yes to work during the strike. I'm doing a trick in you. He unlike a sneaky streaming service. Speaking of string, sneaky streaming services, the flop has been sponsored by a number of different companies. Not sneaky streaming services though. No, no. So why don't we jump to those Dan? I believe you're the first. Uh, yeah, and I definitely had it pulled up and then somehow hit the wrong thing. Um, here it is. Maybe we can use a little bit more of that video drone, fake reality.

That's where things fall into place for Dan. That is realizing it. Yeah. Oh, what makes it you not worry about whether things work. Oh, wait. Actually, here's one more thing, one more thing that video drone idea, even though we're done with that segment. Video drone, the movie is so much about playing on people's sexual desires and what happens when they are removed from reality. And one thing that could be interesting to play with is that the

metaverse as, for instance, Mark Zuckerberg has designed it, or not him specifically, but his tonight as a Facebook, was so incredibly sexless and so incredibly non physical and non body or non-stage wall. And that could be something to play within this new video drone. The idea that the future is not your sexual desires being transmuted electronically, but instead the opposite of that.

Then being denied to you because they don't fit into either the corporate philosophy or the philosophy of the person who ultimately pulls the strings of that corporation. So scary, right? No, no, this world of digital unix that Facebook wants us to be, ooh, frightening. No, man, I guess I'll throw away my milking machine. Okay, Dan, what are we going to do? No, Dan, no, no, you need it. That milking machine is what keeps you human.

Anyway. Dan, get a milking machine. Anyway, what's your sponsor milking machines? No, it ain't you. Nothing is sponsor likes more than coming after that conversation. And we would like to thank our sponsor, our show today is sponsored by Microdose Gummies, which Microdose Gummies deliver perfect entry-level doses of TG that help you feel just the right amount of good. Look, guys, I'm going to be honest with you. Yeah. I got a lot of

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Soilent.com slash flop, code flop. For 20% off your first order of the food of the future. Now, Elliott, I know you were using just now the Yiddish word, Sirus, meaning sort of like, you know, to do like a fuss, you know, but uh, Well, it's like it's like, yeah, worry anxiety, you know, the bad feeling in your stomach, because you think something bad is going to happen exactly. You were talking about living in space. So for a moment, I heard it as serious, the type of cloud that one has to,

you know, break through, through on the way to space. And I was like, when do you want to save yourself from serious? Anyway, that's the best part about going to space. Bring it through that cloud. Is when you just, you just hold your hand out with a net at it and get some clouds and pull them into the window and close the window and take it to space with you.

Yeah, it rolls. Nature's Martian, and nature's cotton candy, you know? Clouds. I wanted to take a moment, if it's possible for me to shield for my own things, Dan and I are on strike. And I have two things I wanna say about that. One, the register goes on strike,

you've heard us talk about it before. We are striking for equitable pay, for real employment, for humans doing the creative work, and this is the kind of strike that a lot of industries are probably going to have to go through, or at least threaten so that we can keep humans on top and machines on the bottom where they belong in our shoes, because we'll have computer shoes in the future. Hopefully, by the time this happens, I'm sure. I heard about a computer that wore tennis shoes.

Yes, yes, yes. The computer is tennis shoes. Oh, okay. Yes, the computer is tennis shoes. It's the computer is tennis shoes. Kurt Russell is still wearing it. It's always Kurt Russell. And so maybe by the time this episode comes out, maybe the strike will be over. Maybe the AMPTP will have come to their God damn senses

and realize that they cannot do their business without us, that they need us and that we are one of the many groups of people that make entertainment possible and make them money. If they haven't, and the strike is still going on, then a lot of writers, and a lot of people in the entertainment industry who are not writers, are going to be out of work and are going to need your help. So that's why if you can, and if you would like to help, I would advise you to go to entertainment community.org and donate, that is the entertainment community fund, used to be the actors fund,

now to the entertainment community fund is for everybody. Go to the area that says, support, film, and television professionals, and make a donation that is money that will go to anyone in the entertainment community who applies for it because they need it. That's not just writers, that could also be actors, that could also be support staff,

such as writers assistants or script supervisors, or anyone who works in entertainment who needs that money when they need it, and we really appreciate the support. If you would rather make a more targeted donation to me and get things in addition as a result, I have some books out on store shelves and you can help me pay the bills by buying some of them. I have two picture books, Sharko and Hippo and Horse Meat Stog, Kids Love Them, and I have, of course, the collections of my comic book, Maniac of New York from Aftershock Comics, please feel free to buy those

and enjoy them. And some of that money will go to me in the case of the books that will go down to paying back the advance because we have not yet done that. But if you want to not do that, if you want to make a donation that will more directly help people and also go entirely to the people who need it, go to entertainmentcommunity.org and make a donation to help the entertainment professionals who need your help so they can get back on their feet and keep making that stuff that you love. We call it entertainment. Thank you. Now that's entertainment.

Bravest Trek is the podcast for all your modern Star Trek meetings. It's funny, informative, and now it's also timely. That's because every Friday, right after the release of a new episode of Strange New Worlds, Picard, Lower Decks, Discovery, or Prodigy, we bring you a review of that episode. There's some great new Star Trek coming up and we're going to cover all of it. You'll like our show because we're both former video producers, so we bring a lot of insight into the production and filmmaking aspects to these episodes. And we also have a very refined sense of humor,

so we make lots of delightful fart jokes along the way. So, come see why Greatest Trek is one of the most popular television recap podcasts on all of the internet. Subscribe to Greatest Trek at MaximumFun.org, or in the podcast app you're using right now. Hey there, this is Dreak Clark. This is Alonso D'Arali. And this is Sparta! If he... Listen, I got 300 on the brain! We just watched the movie 300 in honor of our 300th episode of Maximum Film! That's right! And to celebrate this major milestone,

we brought back original co-hosts, Ricky Carmona, and April Wolf. But just for this one episode, right? Oh, if you know we could never replace you... Some of the voices have changed over the years, heck the name of the show has changed too. But through it all, Maximum Film remains... The movie podcast that isn't just a bunch of straight white guys deal with it. Find this and all 300 episodes of Maximum Film anytime on MaximumFun.org. So the back of this episode of Two Boy Talking Tube to Tube to Tube to do it today,

yes way. We're going to talk about one of the repercussions of the writer's strike. That's right, we're talking reality TV. And the first thing, first part of this segment, we're going to be talking about a little show that my wife and I have been watching since we don't have late night shows to watch. We've been watching the amazing race, which is a show where two people, a team of two, travel all over the world and complete challenges and have to travel around this modern, crazy world and try and they're running a race, okay? It's fairly straightforward. If you haven't seen it, just imagine you go on puzzles and physical challenges and you have to complete them in order to complete this race.

It's like international double dare, but it's you and a partner and you're held hostage by the show and you cannot go home until you lose or finish. Now, Charlie and I have agreed that under no circumstance would we be good teammates for this and I have agreed that under no circumstance would we be good teammates for this? I would watch that all season though. So what I'm gonna put to you, this is a little bit of our lightning round. I'm going to give you three,

I'm gonna, we're gonna go through a number of different rounds and each round I'm gonna give you three options, three fictional characters. And you are going to have to say who you would like to be your teammate and why. Okay. Okay. Fairly simple. And you can pick the same one if you insist. So first, Kermit, Gonzo, or Fuzzy Bear, who would be the best reality show teammate for you? I mean, it's like Kermit, obviously, right? Like, because he's level-headed and he's not gonna

annoy you with his jokes and also he's not gonna be running off to have sex with Camilla when he's supposed to be finishing the competition, right? True. All right, Pete. Uh, that's right, I forgot that in Flav Hescan and Camilla died last year. Now, I am gonna go a different direction. I would say that I am too close to a

curmit, to a point to partner with a curmit. I think, you know, our, I need someone who's skill-slide is different. And I need someone clearly, you know, based on the people I have chosen to surround myself with, I prefer to be around people who annoy me a little. So I'm going to go with Flazzy. Oh cool. I need someone who's always going to be trying to bother me with jokes. Obviously, you know what? What do you want me to say to you?

I'm obviously picking Miss Piggy. I don't think we need to cover that. I'm not an option to present it with. Actually, now that I've already took her, dude. The gonzo might be good. Now they think about it because he is not loathed to a danger to perform dangerous stunts. He is not afraid of putting that long hooked, but not anti-Semitic, knows it's a danger. Yeah, that's great.

Okay, so next round, Perseus Achilles or Jason, not some guy named Jason, we're talking about the Greek hero Jason. Now, okay. Now this is what I love about this is it also ties into my upcoming Disney villains Hades comics mini series that it comes and starts in August. And Jason appears in that series. Spoiler. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, spoiler. No, noted villain. No, well, he's still a villain of it, but the- Jason's not a cool do you know? No, I mean, Jason, well, he, okay, just because he abandoned his wife, causing her to kill

her children is- He's a rascal. But I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say Perseus for this one. Perseus, he's got magic weapons. He got rid of the Medusa, who is also a character in Disney villains' hideous. And he's just all around, you know, he's just a strong, he's a good hero. He doesn't have the emotional instability of Achilles or the Reps-Kallion, leave his wife and cause her to kill his children, quality of Jason. So I'm just Perseus on this one. Is Perseus the one who's the lead of clash of the Titans at the main

yeah, yeah, that's right. Okay, how are you? Is clash of the Titans to Greek mythology pretty close? I mean, it's, I mean, it's a, it's about the rise version of Greek mythology. Certainly. Yeah, I'll go with persi

too. That guy seems to be able to do a lot of stuff. That's a good response. Yeah, I'll go with Percy as to that guy seems to be able to do a lot of stuff. Yeah, that's a good response. Obviously, I'm going hierarchically because hierarchically is the best. Heracles killed his families, dude. Wait a minute, hold on. That's the problem. They're holding back. I mean, sure, he was under a spell of madness.

He was under a spell of madness. Okay. That's also in the Greek, the Greek myth, how the, it's like, I killed my family in a fit of rage. What can I do to atone myself? How do you clean up these tables? How do you? How do you wrestle this dude? Okay, so next round, we got Princess Laya,

Chubaka, salacious crumb. Oh, it's a tough one. I gotta think, I gotta think practically and not just go with the one I wanna spend time with. Yeah, it's a tough one. I got to think, I got to think practically and not go just go with the one I want to spend time with. Yeah, that's the thing. That's the thing that person might inspire you. You know what? Yeah, that's true.

I think, you know what? So Princess Leia obviously a lot of can do attitude, can do just about everything has the force. Chubaka loyal to the end, well, you know, and a great co-pilot. But Salacious crumb, that's the kind of emotional support that I really need. If he can make Java the Hut feel beautiful, then he can make me feel like I can do anything. So I'm gonna go to Salacious Grum. Yeah, I think with Princess Lair, there'd be two big of a wrist that I would get a crush

on her and it would distract me. So I'm gonna go with Chewbacca, a known loyal sidekick. Let's see. I would be thrown off by the fact that he's naked except for a belt. Wait, a band a leader, right? A band a leader. It's a band a leader. It's a band a leader. I mean, if anything that's weirder, I mean, the fact that he's just promised naked, but he's just naked. But his leg is crumb was wearing naked, but with a hat on, that would be weirder. Yeah. I mean, do you think of like dogs as being naked?

All the time. All the time. Yeah. Yeah. That's what he writes house broken. Yeah. Okay. Obviously, I do write a show, but when I'm not on strike, I do write a show about dogs that has a ton of sex jokes in it. So yeah. I wrote down gunk droid. So yeah. I guess that's a sweet choice. Sweet choice. Also very emotionally supportive. No, no, no, no, I'm mentioning, I'm mentioning someone who just got dumped and they're just eating ice cream and just talking out their troubles to gunk. And every time gunk goes gunk, it's like he's saying, I hear

you. I hear you. I hear you. I see myself reflected in his gunk. I've been there. So the next round we got Dominic Toretto. Uh-huh. Okay. Letty. Brian. I gotta say, I don't know the series well enough to know the other thing. You went to the Universal Studios. I did, but it was so incomprehensible. I mean, I'm just gonna, this one I'm just gonna go with the character who I think I would like the most. I would say, I'll say, I'll be okay. That makes sense. Yeah, that's good call. Uh, Elliot.

You know what? He's not one of the ones I think you mentioned, but I'm going to go with Hobbs. I love that adorable tiger. I love that sometimes he's a stuffed animal. Sometimes he's not. And so yeah, I'm just going to go with Hobbs. I'll feed him all the tuna sandwich as he wants. He can, he can pounce on me when I'm coming home from school any day.

Mm-hmm. And I wrote down Roman because he's just going to keep me in stitches the whole time, you know, it's so funny. Okay, next, next round of fictional characters we have, filmmaker Agnes Varda, filmmaker Nick Paul Thomas and Anderson. Okay, so it's not quite a show. Film maker Brian DePaul Ma. Okay, so this is for the amazing race. Yes. I mean, I'm is for the amazing race. Yes.

I mean, I'm going to go, I got it. You're taking them on a modern, amazing race. Okay, I'm going to go with Agnes Varda, not just because I like her movies the most of those, but also she can speak multiple languages. She'll be able to get us around as opposed to Brian DePaul Ma, who is a creep and Paul Thomas Anderson, who I don't know enough about his personal life, honestly. Let's be clear. Paul is that sort of clear.

DiPolma makes movies that have a lot of pervenous in it. He doesn't, he's, they're just not been scandal around. I mean, I mean, I guess the creepiest thing he ever did was set up a camera to catch his dad having an affair when he was a kid. You're right. He's not a, he's not a creep in the way that we say that. That a friend. That a friend's type shit there.

Dude. No, well, the difference in Fablemons was that the whole family was in on it. That the dad was like, get that camera running. I want you to capture your mom's sexy butt on camera. I'm also going to go with Agnes Vardy because I feel like she seems like the most down to earth of them. I feel like she seems like the most down to earth of them. Like I feel like she did direct down to earth starring Chris Rock. He's full of her race. In a way that the others, you know, are maybe two into movies. Yeah, I wrote down

Werner Herzog. Oh, yeah. The man here. Oh, yeah. He'd be great to ship across the jungle. He's been all over the place. He's lived a thousand lives. Okay, and then our last category in the lightning round, we got little foot, Sarah, Petri, the dinosaurs from land before time. Now here's this is another issue where I'm having another year because I want to hang out with Petri, but he's not going to be that helpful. I'm going to, you know, I'm going to go Sarah. I feel like she's got a big attitude.

We're going to disagree, but I can count on her in the clutch and she's got confidence. She's going to pull her way through the situations and not get scared. Yeah, I'm going to say Sarah. This is not a movie I'm really that familiar with. Can I choose? What about the Cine dais? The Cine dais. Is that possible?

But I already interrupt you. I was just wondering, maybe you were more familiar with the Ancillary TV show, Spinoff or the other films. They made like 10. Yeah, they made a ton of them. I don't know. I think I watched half of the original one

because I liked on blue, then I got bored. So Stuart's choking. He's so shocked. I couldn't make it. You never watched the whole thing. Yeah, not an uncommon experience with the Don Bluth film. I haven't admit. I wrote down, of course, the sharp tooth because he's the bad guy and requires all the other characters to defeat him. So I mean, it's pretty simple. Most powerful. Yeah, for sure.

Okay. So that was the lightning round next stage. Last time we had a big writer strike, we got ourselves a reality show president out of the deal. Now let's look at past. I don't, I'm not going to lay that. I'm not going to lay that at the foot of the writers. Oh, interesting. Okay. Why would you? What do you have a you have a dog in this fight? What's going on? So yeah, naked dog. Yeah. I want to look at past presidents and guess if they had a reality show, what would it have been? Okay, now it's my time to shine. I thought he was out of his depth with the land before time. President Bill Clinton, what reality show would he have hosted? F boy Island. F boy Island.

That's actually pretty good. Because he'd also play saxophone as like the opening or the closing. Wait, we have to say real shows. No, we can make up one. It's not a real game, Dan. You can do what you want, yeah. How do you assault stews game like that? And I call it real. It's not a real game. So the next one, okay, we've

already got a minute. When stews, when stew makes a real game, I know I'm going to be Roland Dice. And I'm going to have worms in my head by the end of it. So we got a president Richard Nixon. What was his reality show? What was his reality show? What was his reality show? Probably not a dating show. No. There's, I guess, Liars Poker isn't really a reality show to game show. Again, it doesn't have to be a real show. Okay. I'm gonna let Dan swing on this rope for a little bit longer before I judge it. It's going to be a show about. Did he hold checkers up by his ears? No, you can fit. You're confusing two different presidential dog things.

Okay. mentioned checkers in the speech. Lyndon Johnson held his dogs up by the way. Okay, okay. Which is again, that's that, two presents in a row who have dog relationships. I got both naked. Yeah. America's next top Richard Nixon impersonator. Oh, this is impression everyone did back in the day. Uh, there's just a whole season. I'm just just challenges to see how closely you impersonate president Richard Nixon.

Okay. Holly Squares lineup, huh? Yeah. colleges to see how closely you impersonate president Richard Nixon. Well, Holly was squares lineup, huh? Yeah. Okay, Elliot, how do you feel about this? Yeah, let's, do you got a rebuttal or do you want to move on to the next part? The only thing I had was, this is more of a game show it's called,

are you more conservative than Richard Nixon? And because at the time, he was the epitome of American conservatism. And yet he signed the law creating the EPA. He did a number of things like that. Now, at the same time, he was a warmonger who killed vegetables in here. He was a warmonger who killed many, many people and did break the law routinely in order to undermine the democratic process. But I feel like that's just the thing Republican presidents do before breakfast these days.

Oh, and Democratic presidents to a lesser extent when it comes to killing a lot of people overseas. Yeah, so, yeah, that would be, so you'd have that one. And Jeff Foxworthy would still host it. Okay, Teddy Roosevelt. What's Teddy, Teddy Bayer's little reality show? What do we do in here? I feel like it's a, I'm going to jump in here. It's got to be some kind of like strong man show. So maybe, if I was American Ninja Warrior type, if I was being mooses and stuff.

If I was being harsh and cynical, I'd say it's called the amazing race and it's about how great white Anglo-Saxon culture was because he was, he was a man of the same racial prejudices of his time to a certain extent. But I actually like the adoros of it a lot. So I'm gonna say that it's called, But I actually like the adores of it a lot. So I'm going to say that it's called, it's called political boxing. And it's just him boxing other people in politics. Yeah. Oh, wow. Okay. So I mean, you're limited to your talent pool, but I feel like there'd be people. But the thing is you've got, you've got a team of eight other politicians, and you see them training over the season. And they're in bouts against each other to get to the big bout when they're finally up against TR. And TR is like, he's like Tom Coleke and Top Chef. He's going into the gym and watching them

exercise and kind of playing subtle mind games to undermine them while they're preparing. And then they've got a, they're up against each other. And the ultimate goal is to finally battle theodore Roosevelt at the very end of it. Love it. And the secret is when he gets in the ring, he just shoots them in the face with a rifle. So, so you can't beat Teddy Roosevelt. I'm going to go with something that highlights his, you know, he's an outdoorsman. It's going to be called, it's going to be kind of like Miracat Manor.

It will be called Teddy the Bear, who, and it's just, theater Roosevelt lives with a family of bears for a year, pretending to be one of them. Just living amongst them, living, loving, laughing. It's like a lifestyle reality show. Yeah, it's like 1800 house, but it's about bears. It's lifestyle porn. You want to live like bears, you know, all that fresh salmon, you can shit wherever you want, usually.

I mean, the wood stand, you know. For what I know. Well, I mean, those. You can shit wherever you want. Usually the wood stand. For what? I know. Well, I mean, those fucking Sherman bears are going crazy with that thing. They're pooping all over the place. They love their toilet paper. Their identity is defined by...

All the bears in therapy, and he's like, I just want to be seen as a bear who poops, not a pooping bear. I feel like the recent commercials have gotten even more explicit about the pooping of the bears in a way that like, suggest me. Tell me Clarice, tell me Clarice, you still hear the pooping of the bears. I just feel like, I mean, like they must know how hated these goddamn bears are and they're just like swinging it over

to hate. I do not think they're that hated outside of a small group of people. I think if I think the mainstream audience is both happy to finally be validated as, you know what? She puts that out of our butts and we have to clean it up and it happens to everybody. Yes, they're using a bear, but it's also like, imagine a difficult is for a bear. They have to, you know, it's a mess. It's a mess.

Without toilet paper, it makes me feel better. But you know what, all nature's creatures, you ingest, you must excrete. And finally, someone's admitting it instead of just, you know, talking around it, you know, don't talk, don't talk, don't have it. Don't talk about ladies squeezing the toilet paper in the supermarket. That doesn't tell me what it's about. What it does is not just that the bears are open about pooping. They're very smuggled about it.

I'll be open about pooping. That's fine. It's the fact that like the whole family really seems to like get off and talking about like they're sort of like happy to fucking talk about their bathroom habits. Get out of your shroom of bears. You think there should be a commercial

where they just show an actual bear, like lazily taking a shit in the woods. And then it cuts one of the animated ones, he's like, not me, buddy. Charmin. You do it admitting. Okay, so we're nothing more than animals and clothes. You know, I had like 10 more precedents, but why don't we jump to the final segment here, guys?

Yeah. And this is, this is going to require a little bit of audience participation. We're going to put up a poll on Twitter. I don't know. I don't figure it out. Let's see if Twitter still exists by the time the episode comes out. Who knows? Let's see if we can stomach doing anything.

We have a new, this is another, this is another game, and I want people to vote on which they like the best. Each of us is going to pitch a reality television show that the other two flop house hosts will have to host. Hey, hey, let's say we'll do it on our Instagram drive people to the Instagram. Okay, we need more people on the Instagram anyway. You can vote on the Instagram. Yeah. Okay. So, the other two will host. They don't appear on, oh, they're not contestants. They're not contestants.

They are hosting it. Okay. And you after, after selling the pitch, don't have to be involved ever again. Okay. So I, why don't I go first since I wrote this down and have an advantage? advantage. I think I would like to see a reality show called the flop house where Dan and Elliott spend a season renovating a home, renovating a beat up old house and they have to agree on all the decisions that have to be made, they have to work with an limited budget. Actually, and maybe it'll be a hotel, maybe it's a hotel.

Or yeah, similar, yeah, yeah, that's what I'm doing. So the flop house, a show where Dan and Elliot have to work together to renovate a hotel. Okay, I'm gonna pitch one called the flop health. And this one, stew and Dan, and there's a, there's a stable of minor celebrity contestants. And stew is trying to get them to bulk up and wait lift while Dan is trying to get them to not do that and just sit and watch kind of 70s Italian exploitation cartoons. you'll have to see which which celebrities Are going to be open to which things and you can also they all live in one house together and

All the plots called the flop hospital and Dan and Sue you can wake them up at any hour of the day or night and get them either exercising or chillaxing chill out. Yep. Yep, and so the chillaxing. Chillaxing? Yep. Yep. And so the, and it's at the very end, you see, which, which, and the celebrity that can

best create a balance in their life. They aren't super bulked up and they are not just a catch potato, but instead that they are enjoying life to the fullest in both ways. They win the, and the chance to be the future face of, of Praigo spaghetti sauce. Oh, so there's a competition element. Yeah, there's a competition. I can't like this, okay. Yeah.

And that's the flop health. The flop health, yeah. Yeah. I just like to say, I've, you know, I've started going to yoga classes three times two weeks. So, Dan, this is the Dan character. This is the Dan persona. I just want to, I mean, I would rather flexible jello movies, but I mean, I would rather flexible jello movies, but I'm gonna, my pitch is gonna be called Elliott and Stewart, Metal Nerds.

Okay. And it's gonna be like, you will travel to a bunch of metal concerts across the land. Part of it's like a travel show, like just being in these towns, we see like as fuck around. But then you like hang out with the band afterward. And part of the fun of the show is Stuart's always trying to keep Elliott out at the party as long as we can. And seeing Elliott get tired and more uncomfortable with everything that's happening around him. Yeah, tell me about it.

Yeah, I got to go back to my hotel room to call my family. I'm like, I don't think so, dude. We go to go talk to these guys from stand-in. This is your family of, yeah. The family of metal. Yeah. Wow, that sounds fun. Those are three fun ideas.

So put on your votes over at the Flop Ios Instagram and then we'll make it. I guess we'll make that stuff. Yeah, let's do it. That's something I should mention before we go. This is not a joke. Although we're ending on a funny note, is that even reality shows involve people who are crafting an narrative, who are, that those shows are written. And so they should be covered by the writer's guild of America.

And someday soon, hopefully they will. Reality shows you are not our enemies. You are instead our brothers in television, entertainment production. And we hope to absorb you into the fold and our loving embrace and our health plan sometimes soon. Yeah. Okay. So this has been another astounding episode of revelations on two boy talking tube to two

dudes today. Yes way. I've been your host two boys, Stuart Wellington, and I'm joined by Amacoi. And Metal Nerd Elliott, Kaelin. Yay, and we're on the maximum fun network. You can check out more shows. You can support us over there.

Thanks so much. Thanks to our producer, Howell Dottie, Alex Smith for fixing this whole thing up. I think that's it. Bye. Huh. for fixing this whole thing up. I think that's it. Bye! Huh! Heh heh.