The Flop House - The Bride! with Kenice Mobley
Episode Date: July 11, 2026Oftentimes on The Flop House we wind up watching Hollywood movies that are just kind of dull or mediocre or unimaginative. The Bride!... is not one of those. For all its flaws, it's at least a bona fi...de personal vision that also happens to be a fiasco. And you know what? That's kind of heartwarming. We're joined by Kenice Mobley to dissect (ha) the many parts that make up The Bride! And if you like Kenice, check out The Hot Guy Draft in August! Stay updated on all things Flop House, plus a little extra, with our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets! Wikipedia page for The Bride! Recommended in this episode: Dan: Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977) Stu: Exit 8 (2025) Elliott: The Straight Story (1999) Kenice: Lisa Frankenstein (2024) Help support this show and unlock bonus content! Become a member at https://maximumfun.org/joinflop
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey, you, come here.
I got to let you know that the flop house is going to be doing a live show on September 18th.
That's a Friday night in Louisville, Kentucky at the Whirling Tiger.
We're going to be covering the famous box office bomb glitter starring Mariah Carey.
And we're going to feature special guest Howled Audie, who's stepping out from behind his producer duties to be part of the show.
Tickets are 20 bucks, doors at seven, show at eight.
Go to the whirlingtiger.com now.
On this episode, we discuss the bride.
You mean, the bride!
Okay.
Hey, everyone, welcome to the flop house.
I'm Dan McCoy.
I'm Stuart Wellington.
And I'm the guy you've come to know and loathe, Elliot Kalin.
That's right, I'm back.
You couldn't shake me, loser.
Fucking heel of that.
What town are we in?
right now because it sucks.
Oh, wow.
I want them to boo me so that when Stewart
defeats me at the end, it's that much more
dramatic and exciting. There's a grandma
in the audience who's like booing loudly.
Hold on. I have to introduce our guest who's already
encouraging Elliot's shenanigans.
And that's Kenesmobli,
a stand-up. You may have
seen her on the Tonight Show. If not,
look it up.
She does the hot guy draft.
Google. I met her doing
an uptown showdown
where we talked about fashion.
I forget which side of it I was on.
Because I think we were on the same side
because we were pro suits over sweats.
Yes. Yeah.
Thankfully that, you know, it was an easier
thing to me rather than
lying about my fondness for sweats.
I'm not. You don't seem like a sweats guy.
No. Audrey just
since the pandemic, she's like,
clothes, why?
And the whole time I've been like,
no, must put on full
outfits. I'm on your side,
Pierre.
Hopefully, I think keeping me
same.
For the listener at home,
just to make it clear,
Dan is speaking truth.
He is wearing,
not just a three-piece suit,
but actually a seven-piece suit right now.
He's got so many vests.
He's wearing spats.
He's got like those sock garters
and things like that.
You can see it all.
He's wearing a hat.
Yeah, he's really dressed up.
No, I'm wearing a short-sleeved button up,
but it is your sucker, so I am a bit of a
fancy leg.
Yeah, yeah, sure.
Kenny's, thank you for being with us.
Thank you for having me.
Big fan of the podcast.
Oh, thank you.
You saw us during Sketchfest.
I did.
And that was very nice of you to come to see the show.
I was like, it was sold, it was sold out to me.
And I was like, I'm not going to bother them.
They have too many fans.
I'll just, I'll sit here, I'll watch the show, I'll text them afterwards.
This is lovely.
I'm glad it was lovely.
Yeah.
We watched the ride.
I love that attitude, by the way.
That's really impressive.
Just be like, I don't want to trouble anybody.
It's just let's chill.
As a Midwesterner, you love that attitude.
Yeah, anything where I can like just be reserved, don't speak up, pretend that I like people.
That's very Midwestern of me.
See, as opposed to, I've got East Coast vibes.
So it's a lot of like, hey, I like this thing.
How do I make myself a part of it so I can claim a piece of it and go from fan to own
you know, that's not a good attitude to have.
I'm a southerner, so I'm just like, y'all, that's nice.
That's nice.
A lot of, Lord, it's hot today.
Let's just set a while, all that kind of stuff.
Oh, sweet tea, give it to me.
I'm drinking my, I'm actually literally drinking unsweetened teas right now.
Watch out, sour tea.
Yeah, I'm like, you just want dirt water, okay.
Dan, just what hears what he does, he goes to Prospect Park, he just picks a
bunch of leaves off the ground,
sticks them in some water
that a rat was swimming in,
and he calls it New York tea.
Doesn't want to sleep it.
Bitterness is sweetness
to me, Elliot.
We had bizarro, Daniel.
We could have a nice time
just making this into a chatting
podcast.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Dan, tell me,
what's your body count?
I don't know what that means.
Oh, I do know what that means.
I don't want to get into it.
You live in Brooklyn.
How could you not?
I know what that means.
I'm a sweet lad.
Oh, okay.
See, he's blushing in his seven-piece suit.
This is very hot today.
I wonder he's drinking that sour tea, yeah.
This is a podcast where we watch a movie that was a critical or a commercial flop,
and then we talk about it.
And I believe this was both.
Yeah, yeah.
Mixed critical reviews very much a financial disappointment, though.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It did strike me.
The reviews going into it, it felt like for a select few, it was very much their shit.
And then for a lot of people, it was, I either hate this or I'm like they thought it was kind of a swing and a miss.
Yes.
I think it's the kind of movie.
It's the kind of movie.
It's hard for me to imagine Maggie Jeline Hall, the director of the movie, writer and director of the movie,
making this movie and thinking, this is my four quadrant hit.
Yes.
That's going to establish, this is when they offer me a Marvel movie afterwards.
No, I don't think she wanted that, but it is kind of astounding that the money was given for this, which I'm not saying it shouldn't be.
No, no, but I'm just saying in Hollywood, it is wild.
Yes.
Well, she can bring in, she can bring in stars and her previous movie, The Lost Daughter, people really like to.
I mean, it is really good.
And so, you know.
And she's, you know, I read she just got signed to work on a new movie as writer-director.
So I'm glad this is not.
Oh, wow.
This is not...
She's doing the saber-tooth spin-off.
I like her.
I don't want her to be marked by the failure of this movie.
I'm glad that she's, you know, getting another bite.
But this one was not well-received in general.
You're being very kind in your words.
You guys are being so kind.
We like Maggie Gyllenhaal and the other people involved.
Yeah.
So she is the best thing in the film, 40 days, 40 nights, which we recently did on the podcast.
Dylan Hall is in 40 days and 49.
She was the best friend.
She's the best friend of the female lead.
Shannon Sossaman.
I own 40 days and 40 nights.
I'm so sorry.
Stewart's face just fell.
Why is your faceball so hard?
I hate it so much.
It's Stewart's least favorite movie.
It didn't impact your youth?
Well, I mean, I was like in my 20s when it came out.
So I don't know if it impacted my youth.
But yeah, I mean, it was, I just hate it.
I hate everything about it.
To quote ugly kid Joe.
I think he had a big impact on him.
He's very, he spent a number of years trying to perfect erotic flower play after that.
And he could never get the results.
So that love curdled to hate.
But it was F-L-O-U-R play, unfortunately.
Yeah.
Dusts women with flower.
I'm sure there's movies where they do that.
So they won't stick.
Yeah, Labor Day, dude.
Oh, right, right.
So let's talk about The Bride, because that's what we heard it talk about.
Or as it's typographically listed, the Bride!
Because there's a big exclamation point at the end.
So this is a...
You're on summary duty on this one?
I'm on summary duty.
It's very summary.
I watch this on...
This is one of the available in-flight entertainment options
on my flight back from Frankfurt, Germany.
Oh, wow.
Now, tell us a little bit about your trip.
Thank you, Luftanzah.
Stuart, I think if I'd tell people the story of this trip, they would be laughing too hard.
They would have to go to a doctor.
It was like some sort of European vacation.
I tell you, before the recording, Stuart said, I have a really funny story to tell you.
And I was laughing so hard, I think I tore my esophagus.
It was just what he told me.
Normally, Elliot has a much deeper voice.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Yeah, my resonant base that listeners have gotten so used to.
Yeah.
Forresting Jr., they call him.
Well, that's because of the paternity lawsuit.
But you guys may remember the press, the press that I did, the press statement where I said,
I always thought of myself as blessed.
I suppose Brian doesn't feel the same way about it.
Yeah, very Rodin Farrow of you.
I call him Brian now and not Papa because of the lawsuit.
Yeah.
So anyway, let's talk about, Stuart, did you watch it in English or Alf Deutsch while you're on the plane?
I watched it in English, yeah.
Charlene watched it.
We like simultaneously...
Do you guys ever do this with your partner
when you're flying?
You like try and start at the exact same time?
Yeah, yeah.
No.
But she fell asleep.
That's my time.
Yeah.
I mean, normally I'm pretty strict
about my in-flight and entertainment.
I like read books because I'm like,
there's time now.
Or I will...
But then your glasses break and you go,
no, no, if there was time.
I can't get your glasses on the plane.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Maybe if it's a nice flight.
Yeah, if it's a snowpiercer.
That's right.
They're optometrists on Snowpiercer.
That's right.
Snowpierce air would have an optometrist on there, yeah.
Draw it up.
Give me a drawing, somebody.
That's how you request fan art.
And the artist of you trying on glasses on snow piercer?
That's what is, yeah?
Like, oh, that's what a baby looks like.
So the...
That's what I've been eating all this time?
Oh, God.
He tricked me.
Tilda Swinton.
The, oh man, if Tilda Swinton fed me a baby, I'd be like, okay, I guess I trust her.
So what I was saying is I normally try and watch my own ship.
This time, Charlene always wants to watch something with me, and this time we watched the bride together.
She did not watch the bride the whole way.
She fell asleep about 10 minutes in.
Okay.
They had them, huh?
Yeah.
And then she tried to tell me what she saw, and then I filled in the blanks, because she felled in the blanks.
she woke up basically right at the end
and then was
shocked by a very specific
musical choice.
Yes.
Oh, yeah.
Maybe my favorite part of the film.
I mean, there's a, I assume
it's the same one I'm thinking of, in which case, the whole time I was like,
is she aware that this thing exists already?
And then they played that song and I was like, oh,
she's certainly aware.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.
So, ironically, I fall asleep a lot when I'm watching movies at home.
This is one of the few movies I did not fall asleep
at any point during.
So Charlene and I had a totally opposite experience.
Yeah.
This one I watched sitting on the couch with my wife, not doing dishes.
Elliot watches movies while he's doing the dishes, which seems challenging.
Do you have a TV above your sink?
I have a little iPad that I watch.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah.
Interesting.
I mean, he's a very busy man and we force him to do this podcast.
So he has to fit it in where they forced me.
It's against his will to do the podcast.
I tried to change my name.
I moved to a cabin in the woods.
And then I was out chopping wood once.
time with a big beard in a puppy coat and Stuart and Dan drove up in a truck and I said how'd
you find me?
We're going to you for 400 last jobs.
That's a name I haven't heard in a long time.
So anyway, we start in there, we start, there's some text on the screen in black and white
it says in 1888, sorry, not 1888, in 1818, in 1818, Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein
on a dare, which is not totally true.
It was kind of a storytelling contest game, yeah.
Yeah.
I'm going to be in a, I'm going to be in a year.
Guys, we don't get into fucking storytelling contest games and not for a.
No.
I'm just D&Ding it up and show.
Television, the internet.
There's too much stuff to do.
It's rare that we and our libertine friends are stuck by, by bad weather in a villa on Lake Geneva.
That doesn't happen that often, you know.
But I'm going to be in the Geneva area just like a week.
If we changed our lives, we could.
We lived a little differently.
Come on, guys.
I'm going to be in the Geneva area in like a week.
for work and I'm very disappointed that I'm not going to have the time to go see the villa where that storytelling contest happened and where Mary Shelley first started writing Frankenstein.
So I really want to see it.
Isn't it wild that one of these dudes is just named Lord Byron?
That's crazy.
I mean, his name is George.
His name is George.
I mean, he is Lord Byron.
Like, what?
But he has the name.
That's crazy.
So anyway, he is not in this movie.
But Mary Shelley is.
played, this is one of the two roles played by Jesse Buckley.
And I will say, I'm going to give a spoiler ahead of time.
I overall, pretty much like this movie, but these parts...
I'm softer on this thing than I thought I would.
Yeah, but these parts with Mary Shelley are the one thing in the movie that it would not work for me.
It begs the quite...
Why?
Yes, and so, so, well, let me tell you because the concept is, Mary Shelley tells us that
Frankenstein was only half the story.
She couldn't write the rest of it because she died.
And she spent centuries in kind of limbo trying to get the rest of the story told.
She goes, is it a ghost story or a love story?
And what this sets us up for is a world where Frankenstein is a story.
Whereas we get a world where Frankenstein is a real person who exists.
And yet Mary Shelley is also a person who exists and wrote a book called Frankenstein.
And they never really tie this knot.
It's also awfully balzy for a movie to be like, this is what Mary Shelley would have written if she'd live longer.
And by the way, it's going to be twice the scary shit that that thing was.
I will say that except she is.
So I think what Maggie Jeline Hall is trying to do is playoff of the opening of the opening
of Bride of Frankenstein,
which opens with Mary Shelley and Percy Shelley and Lord Byron.
And Lord Byron goes, that Frankenstein story is so scary.
And she goes, well, there's more.
And then she starts telling the story of that movie.
So I think Maggie Gillenhall is very much playing off of what happens in Bride of Frankenstein.
But in that movie, it's entirely a story Mary Shelley is telling.
There's no part where Mary Shelley is interacting with the characters, which happens
throughout this.
She's, yeah, possessing a person, yeah.
Yeah.
So then we're in the 1930s.
We're in a restaurant.
There's a woman named Aida.
A restaurant that is a hundred.
100% Gage and Tolner in Brooklyn, New York.
There's no question.
And the funny thing is this scene does feature some oyster issues.
And I got to say, I got fucking food poisoning from an oyster there.
So I sympathize.
Wow.
There's no question.
On libel or slander, whichever one is spoken.
All he was telling you is, all he's saying is what actually happened.
Just the facts, Dan.
But you weren't possessed by the spirit of an author.
I feel like this is actionable.
I've been back there multiple times.
I think it's a nice restaurant.
Maybe because George R. Martin was buying me dinner.
I liked it a lot.
What?
Yeah.
Did I drop that name?
Why did you pick it back up?
That's the entire reason that Stewart brought this up.
I mean, it's 100% Gage and Tolner.
And also this scene does feature a friend of a friend,
Indie darling, John McGarrow, who's friends with a friend of mine,
so I can't say anything bad about him.
But it's not bad.
He's good.
He's good in him.
Which one is he?
He's the, like, date.
Yeah.
He's the guy who looks kind of sad.
He's the one who turns into an assassin later.
I mean, I won't say anything bad about any of the actors in this.
I don't think that they're the issue with the film.
They're all committing.
Everyone's trying.
Everyone's trying hard.
So they're in this restaurant.
There's a woman named Ida, also played by Jesse Buckley.
And Mary Shelley starts to possess, she's like, I'm going to possess this woman's body.
And it's this drunken dinner.
She's with these really douchey guys.
And suddenly she starts convulsing.
And Mary Shelley is entering her mind and she starts climbing on the table and
rambling and she does a thing which I do not love during the movie where now in Mary Shelley
voice she's just free associating words you think I'd love this because I do it all the time
but it turns out that I'm not annoying me as much as I prefer to annoy other people I mean you're
also doing it for comedy purposes and here like look I I think that this culture should
hold up intellectualism a little bit more than it does rather than the scoff at it you would think
that egghead.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Have you ever seen the Big Bang theory?
These dudes are hilarious.
And thus I, like, hate when something's called pretentious.
Because most of the time I feel like that's just, like, people not wanting to engage with a thing.
And, like, being, being like, uh, this is too uppity for me, like, essentially.
But I find this pretentious all of me like Mary Shelley.
It's the kind of thing I think I would buy.
I would accept more in a play than in a movie.
Yeah.
And I can't white put my finger except that I expect,
I think I expect a certain level of pretentiousness
from the theater that I am less
willing to take from movie.
But she's really scaring people.
She's seen particularly angry at a gangster
who's sitting nearby, who we learn more about later.
And the guy she's with her like, hey, stop it.
And they hit her, and then they push her down a flight of stairs
and in voice over.
One of the guys was on, okay, go on.
Our flat means death?
Yes, that's what I was going to say.
And the evil gangster is,
the evil gangster is the guy from Triangle,
sadness. And Superman. And Superman? And Superman? He plays Superman. He played Superman. No, he plays
the Bravian leader. Right. No, you're right. You're right. He's also in Wonder Man as a famous
director. I know him from Wonder Man. I haven't seen either of those yet. I'll have to watch him at some
point. In voiceover, she says a revolutionist coming that will really frighten you. But Ida
is dead at the bottom of the stairs. Then it's Chicago. Daytime.
Chicago, there's a masked man
who is clearly Frankenstein
played by Christian Bailey.
Shouldn't he be Frank?
I was like, we keep calling him Frank, but
come on, guys.
He says, he says, my name's Frank.
Frankenstein's monster if you're nasty.
And then
he shows up...
F monster.
He shows up to see Dr. Euphronius
played by Annette Benning.
Star of the great outdoors, Annette Benning.
Star?
That's right.
And this is where
this is where things start to
So he's like, I'm here to see Dr. Euphronius, and she's like, I don't know, da-da-da, and then she reveals, I'm actually Dr. Euphronius.
So they do a little, oh, the doctor was a woman moment.
That's a reoccurring theme.
Because she's like, she's like, oh, I've read all of Dr. Frankenstein's books.
I'm familiar with his work.
And this is another moment where I'm like, wait, so is Frank.
So Frankenstein is famous in this world.
Like people are familiar with the story because it's, it's, and maybe this is just they're famous scientists who other people have not heard of, you know, which is fine.
And there are plenty of people who don't know who Richard Feynman is
and he's a relatively famous scientist.
But there are parts throughout where I'm like,
do people know what Frankenstein's monster is in this movie
or do they not know what Frankenstein's monster is?
Because everyone's aware there are monsters,
but he should be famous.
It should be like in the X-Men comics when Wolverine shows up places
and they're like, you're Wolverine from the X-Men?
Like he's famous at this point.
And this is a, well, I got to say,
like, this is the sort of levels of reality thing
that I know we offer this kind of like
kind of non-critique all the time.
But if everything else in the movie was working,
I wouldn't be thinking about it, but it's not.
So I'm like, okay, what's the reality here?
Like, where are we in time and space
and between fiction and reality?
We're also very early in the movie.
And so there isn't enough movie yet for me to grab onto.
So I'm worrying about this stuff.
So Dr. Euphonius examines Frankenstein scars.
She wants him to stay at her institute.
But he wants to, he's never had a physical relationship.
He says the first time he ever shook hands
was when he shook hands with Dr. Euphronius
minutes ago. So it's a real elephant man
type situation. It's been like a hundred
years. Yeah. And
he looks pretty normal.
Yeah. He looks pretty
he looks like a guy who's been in a really bad car. I mean he's got a mask
on. I mean, I think he could have
if he wanted to shake hands. He could be shaking hands.
Of course, to a liberal like you
a liberal like you was afraid of COVID,
masks are normal. But to someone like me, I'm like,
why's the guy wearing a mask? I understand. Let's put him on the
scale of, on one end of the scale, we have
dark man. That's probably as gross as you
can be and still be the
versus like Ryan Reynolds' Deadpool where you're like,
Ryan Reynolds' Deadpool, you're like, yeah, he look fine.
You look like Midwestern Ryan Reynolds.
Yeah.
Like they make a point of saying how gross he looks, but he still, like it still looks like
Ryan Reynolds, right?
I think with Frankenstein, it's the noticeable stitches on the far head and things like that.
And his nose looks like it's been broken a few times.
He looks like he's a boxer.
He looks like an ex-boxer.
Yeah.
Again, if anything, Stitches suggests to me like, oh, this is a man with a medical issue,
rather than this is a monster.
Maybe he was a snitch.
And he's also, maybe this is a matter of the way they shoot.
Like, Frank, he's not as, he doesn't feel as enormous as the monster does.
Like, in the old Frankenstein movies, Boris Karloff looks so much huger than anybody else, you know.
I mean, Jacob Allorty five months before this is Frankenstein.
And you're like, whoa, he's big.
But this monster is Christian Bale height.
I will say, though, that Jacob Alorty is big, but he is also hot Frankenstein.
So when people are like, kill it.
I'm like, I don't understand.
He just looks like a hot dude.
I understand.
So he's, unless those, maybe those hunters in the, in the,
jealous.
They're exactly, they're like,
that man's hotter than we'll ever be,
destroying him.
Or women will know that they can have him instead of us.
All the women are going to pick him.
Like, what women?
Where are the Arctic?
There might be some.
The Arctic women.
Those are walruses.
He's like so skinny.
Like, when you got visible abs like that,
he doesn't have enough body fat to survive out in the wilds of Antarctica.
No, no.
for sure. He's definitely, he should have died of Mount
Nutrition, but again, also he's pieced together by corpses and
if you shoot him, nothing happens. Oh, fuck. Yeah, he's
magic, I forgot. He's magic.
I thought he was, I thought he was regular, my mistake.
No, no. There is a point in that movie where it's like, wait, so
if, because he died once already, I guess he's like immune to things that would kill a
normal person? Like, I don't understand. I was like, oh, I wasn't aware that
Frankenstein monster had these superpowers. I mean, I love Del Toro, but
sometimes he gets into that shit.
Yeah.
It seems like it would be easier to kill Frankenstein
Because like he's just held together with stitching
So like you'd be like a few well-placed gunshots
Yeah
Just sneak up on him with his fair scissors, yeah
So he's like I want a physical relationship
I want a bride, I want you to build me one
He's also obsessed with with movie musicals
Specifically the movie musicals of an actor named Ronnie Reed
Where the idea is that Ronnie Reed
Was an actor who had polio and he had to accommodate
for that to become a famous dancer
And he's played by Jake Gyllenhaal.
And the whole time I'm like,
how did I get Jake Gyllenhaal for this movie?
He's a big star.
How they get him in this film?
So he's constantly going to the movies
and watching these old musicals
and he imagines himself in the movies.
And this was when I was watching this to my wife
and she was like, you're seeing Frankenstein
in a top hat and tails dancing.
And she's like, she's like,
does Maggie, all I can think about is young Frankenstein.
Like does Maggie Gillenhall know young Frankenstein exist?
And then later on they sing putting on the writs.
And you're like, okay, she definitely knows that young Frankenstein exists.
Like there's no way.
And I actually can't.
Coinsidence. And it really threw me, but by the end, I came to really like it.
Because it seemed to me like she was like, oh, that scene in that movie is a joke of how awkward
the character is. I'm going to give him grace. I'm going to give him a level of dignity that he doesn't
have in that scene, which I thought was kind of cool. But anyway, that wasn't until later. Anyway,
he walks by some sort of red light district. Frankenstein is he's not comfortable around
sin, you know. Dr. Afronius, she's got issues with the different methods of corpse survival
that they're going to try to figure this out.
They're on board.
Frank wears down her resistance.
Next thing you know,
they're digging up the body of that same woman,
Ida, that Mary Shelley possessed.
And it makes you wonder,
has Mary Shelley just been sitting in that dead body underground
for like days now?
Any moment.
Any moment now.
Any moment now.
Because she's read the script.
She knows she'll get, like in the Muppet movie.
She knows she'll get dug up.
And Frank is like, no, she's too beautiful.
But we try it anyway.
I kind of like that moment where he's like,
she's too beautiful.
Because like, I don't know, like,
Yeah.
What's the thing that happens?
His self-esteem is low.
And also maybe he's like, I don't know, she doesn't.
He looks clearly like a monster and she does not.
And I think that, I don't know.
She looks like she's spilled some ink on her face.
Yeah.
I mean, she's so undead, right?
Like we're.
Yeah, but we don't know.
I mean, yeah, we don't know the degree to which there's an odor.
If Jesse Buckley showed up at a red carpet dress like this, people would be like she is serving.
Yes, yeah, sure.
She's serving bride realness.
Yeah.
But also, I think, again, this is a play, I think, on the end of Bride of Frankenstein
where they finally revive the bride.
And the first time she sees Frankenstein, she screams.
She's like, I don't want this.
This is not anything I'm interested in right now.
Yeah.
But they're trying to do this experiment.
Meanwhile, the doctor's made, Greta, is suspicious.
And I kept thinking they were setting up Greta to be a bad guy, but it never quite happens.
No, no.
They do the experiment.
This is a minor comic figure.
Yes.
And then later on, kind of an ally.
We'll see.
Eventually, everyone's just putting ink on their face.
They do the experiment.
It works.
They revived her.
My wife went, it seemed pretty easy.
She was not impressed by how easy it was to revive the dead.
She coughs up a bunch of black blood.
That's how she gets that stain on her face.
And then she laughs.
Then she goes back and forth as she will throughout the movie between her two accents,
Chicago Mall, Ida, and British Mary Shelley, who rambles lists of words.
And she's wary of them.
I mean, at some undetermined point, midway through the moment,
movie, she kind of stops doing it entirely.
The Mary Shelley stuff.
Yeah, the Mary Shelley stuff.
I don't know if it's because there's a thematical moment that I did not catch or
they just forgot about it.
Well, then she comes back at the end, like, as if like re-emerging like the Hulk to take
vending vengeance.
That's true.
I mean, Mary Shelley has often been compared to the Hulk.
I mean, ironically, the Hulk was, I mean, the Hulk was, the Hulk as a character
was heavily influenced by Brangestinestein.
So it makes sense.
Yeah, yeah.
So Frank is in love at first sight
And the bride is asking euphronius about Frank
And Frank imagined himself tap dancing in a movie
This will happen throughout the movie
Is Frank imagining himself into being a tap dancer
In a Freda Stereotype movie
And Mary Shelley is talking to the bride in her head
As the bride floats above her body one night
And she's like, I can't remember my name
And she wakes up on the operating table
Frank is sleeping on the floor and he wakes up
I kind of like that sequence
Yeah, he hits her by accident
But he does a little dance routine for her
and she lists more words.
He hits her.
Yeah, he does.
After, he was locked out of her room for a reason,
but he broke into her room.
He broke into the window. Yeah.
He sleeps under her bed,
and then she wakes up and he hits her.
You're a great start to a relationship.
I do think that this movie...
I think the things to remember is they're also reanimated corpses.
So they're operating with different rules, I guess.
I will say this movie, for all that it, like,
wants to be, like, a feminist reimagining,
feels oddly soft on Frankenstein's monster to me,
considering like the thing about the bride of Frankenstein
is like they go through all this trouble.
And as you say, she's reanimated.
Like, no, I don't want that.
What?
You can't like, like, you know,
she's only in the very end of the movie.
So the feminist like impact of it is maybe a little dimmed
in that she's such a small part of her own picture.
But it is her being like,
hey, you can't just invent me to be a wife.
Whereas this one, she kind of like seems into it by the end, even after she's like, well, okay, you did lie to me about all this stuff.
I think that, I think I would say that's not an, I mean, she is, he wins her over and then they have a, and they have a relationship and they have a messy relationship.
And I think that's different.
When you say he wins her over just by like, being there?
I mean, there's a little bit of the, well, he's the man in the movie.
And he must have a soft heart.
And so, I mean, because the doctor, I guess, chose.
gave him too soft a heart.
He had Stallone's disease.
That's going back to an earlier episode
where his heart is literally too soft
and his blood is too hard.
I mean, he's a gentle monster.
He is eventually respectful to her
and protective.
But I do think it's weird
that they pull that switch
in a movie that's, I think,
trying to be like,
you know, this is going to be about women.
You know, I don't know.
I guess I think the difference is that
he is consistently supportive of her
and everything she does.
Yes.
And rather than, he has created her for himself,
but rather than trying to change her,
he changes himself in more ways than she changes.
Like, whenever she does anything,
he's like,
kind of, yeah, it is a reverse grease.
And he doesn't, yeah, he doesn't try and hold her back at any point.
It actually makes things drier and less slippery, yeah.
It's like a chalk or something.
Yeah, exactly, exactly.
We come, some people call it chalk.
I call it reverse grease.
Yeah, yeah.
I put it on my hands when I do my gymnastics routines.
I say, hand me the reverse grease.
People are so confused.
I go into the arts.
Can you give me some reverse grease?
What?
Yeah, yeah.
The sticks are reverse grease
so I can draw on the, on the yard...
Sir, please leave.
Officer, where were the dead bodies found?
Oh, you can see the outline drawn in reverse grease.
Now I'm also thinking reverse grease is also the bizarre version of Greece.
Where, yeah, you're not the one that I want.
Dubbo-Dibut-a-Dubidoo, ooh, ooh, ooh, yeah.
And they were actually born to not hand-jive.
It's the one thing I cannot do.
It would be very dangerous for me, yeah.
Beauty school graduate.
And of course, reversed grease, lightning.
Yeah.
But so I think that's the difference here.
But I agree.
It starts on shaky ground.
They have breakfast.
And the bride keeps saying, I would prefer not to to everything.
And it annoyed me so much that at first they misattribute.
Who wrote that?
I'm like Melville.
It's Melville.
Come on.
Melville.
Come on, guys.
But the bride starts breaking dishes because she wants to leave.
She's just like very casually breaking the dishes.
Frank loves it.
And they sneak out and go to the movies.
Frank mansplains about Ronnie Reed,
the star of the movie tour.
And she leads him to...
It's like his one fucking thing, dude.
Let him...
Yeah, he loves that.
Nothing else.
No, but I'm just saying it's a bad idea
to give guys the idea that women really want you
to take them to the movies
and then talk through the movie
explaining the backstories
for people in the movie.
Nobody wants that.
I don't know.
I learned from experience.
Quite differently, this is a horror film
wherein a late.
a lady's just mining her own business
and then Mary Shelley
ruins her life.
That's the movie.
That's great.
She was having a great time
at a dinner, eat noisters.
I believe we,
Peter Sarsgaard gives us a different picture
of her.
That's true.
That's true.
Peter Sarsgarde
are fucking sandwich-enthus.
Sandwich enthusiasts.
But again,
Peter Sarskartzs,
like, how are they getting these big stars?
I don't understand.
I mean, what do they,
anyway.
What connection possible it could?
Reminds me of the story of,
when I was walking down Atlantic Avenue once,
and Peter Stars Guard and Maggie Gillen Hall
were walking in the opposite direction
towards me and my wife
and it was clear that they were in the situation
all couples have been in,
which is you are on your way to a social event,
you have just had a fight,
and you are not,
you are kind of still mad at each other,
but you have to leave to be on time to this thing.
And I was like, huh, they really are people,
they really are like us, celebrities.
They've gone through those things too.
But you could just read it on their faces.
It was so clear it was like,
we just had an argument,
we have to be somewhere,
we're just going to let it sit for now.
And I was, I really appreciate it.
Anyway, so,
Frank's...
So anyway...
Thanks Peter and Maggie.
For that moment.
They go to like, I guess, like a queer dance club.
And she dances and Frank imagines them dancing.
There's a lot of dancing in this movie.
And the bride sees herself in a mirror and she's got this all black tongue and she's dancing some more while Frank's watching.
And he's like...
And he's like, whatever, I just want her to be free.
Exactly.
He's like, end it.
Well, he's also...
There's a little bit of Kuckenstein in him too.
I think he kind of likes to see her, you know, with other guys.
But the other guys, they are being too rough.
They're these kind of like gangster types.
They're being too rough.
They're being too hansy and assaultive.
And the bride shouts something about violence and the gangsters attack her.
But Frank takes her away.
The gangsters follow and attack them and Frank kills both of them and smashes their heads open.
He just kicks one guy's head right open.
But someone takes their picture and they run away.
And it's one of the things where it's like such a clear case of self-defense, but they're monsters.
They know they're going to be.
Yeah.
Also, they didn't take.
There was just a conveniently a camera person sitting there while she was about to
assaulted.
Yeah, and this is the 30s.
Those cameras are not that easy to use.
Like, you've got to be ready and waiting.
Maybe there's a paparazzi there to catch monsters.
Wasn't it, Penelope Cruz, who took the picture?
I thought that was...
Who sold it to the paper?
Well, no. I mean, when she shows up later, the, you know, the secretary.
I do not catch that.
If that's the case, I didn't catch it.
Then I'll get up.
You guys keep talking.
Okay.
Anyway, the Frank and the bride, they go on the run.
The bride and Mary Shelley.
And he also, like...
At this point, Frankenstein's like, look, I've been through this before.
People are going to chase my ass with pitchforks and torches.
Yeah.
You, he's like, go on get.
Go on get.
Yeah, he tries to pull Harry and the Henderson's on it.
Yeah, yeah.
And she's like, well, where am I going to go?
And he's like, okay, you can come with me.
I can't confirm.
It's probably wrong.
Yeah, she's like, I don't know where I live, dog.
I don't have a name.
I can't wash this spot off my face.
Like, come on.
It looks cool, though.
Of course it looks cool.
I think so.
She makes it look cool.
So the bride,
Mary Shelley,
they have a talk
about how the bride
needs to remember her name
and they hop a freight train.
The cops are searching for them
unfortunately.
And Frank starts telling the bride
stories about her life
before she died.
He's like making up a past history
for her.
And it's throughout the movie
was unclear to me
how much she,
by the end,
she's like,
you lied to me,
but it seems like
she's playing this game
with him to a certain extent.
But anyway,
she starts doing a Marlena
Dietrich impression really loudly, which draws the cop's attention.
And the bride has to push, he, he, he is about to shoot back sense.
Nothing draws a cop's attention like a Marlene Adetri compression.
He's like, oh, is the German Shantus here?
Is the blue angel here in the train with us?
The most famous legs in the world.
So she has to push the cop out and he hits his head on something.
People in movies are always hitting their heads fatally when you push them on things.
I have never seen this happen in real life, thanks.
Well, how many people have you pushed, Elliot?
I live in a house with two boys.
So they're constantly pushing each other.
And it would be terrifying if I thought every time they push each other,
they might hit their head and die instantly.
I think about this all the time.
Really?
Really?
Since I was a kid and I watched six feet under with my family,
a kid is jumping on the bed.
Family viewing if ever there was.
Yes.
It's a show about a family.
Yeah, exactly.
Sure, yeah.
But a kid falls off the bed, hits his head, dies.
And I was like, well, that's it.
That's how I'm going to go.
And so now I'm like, if I hit my head or if I fall in any way,
I'm like, this is, this is it.
But look how far you've come.
Yeah.
Yeah. Well, that's not why you can.
That's why you put out that line of helmets for people.
People probably know you best from Knessa's head protectors, which are the word.
What they do, what I like about is they're bespoke is that you go to the head protector store.
They measure your head.
They give you a bespoke helmet that fits your head.
It means you can't share them, but that's okay.
I like that she named them head protectors rather than helmet, a word that already exists.
You can't trademark.
Can't trademark.
I see.
Yeah.
The band Helmut tried and failed.
They didn't.
Yeah, they couldn't do it.
Yeah, exactly.
And also,
helmet Cole tried to.
Lang?
Leng?
Helmut Lange.
There's a lot of helmets out there.
A lot of examples.
Now they're really on the run.
And we're introduced to our new characters,
detectives Wiles and Molloy.
This is Peter Sars Guard at Penelope Cruz.
Wiles is the detective.
Malloy is technically a secretary,
but she's the one who really comes up
with all the brilliant deductions.
But she's a woman, so.
A wooden-and-steal arrangement kind of going on.
Very much so, yeah.
They're on Frank's trail.
Meanwhile, Frank gets in a fountain and collects pennies.
I guess they're in New York now, it turns out.
And the bride sees a newspaper story about them,
and he tells her her old name was Penelope Rogers,
which she doesn't love.
So she says, call me Penny instead,
call me pretty penny.
And she starts giving Frank a blowjob, but he does not want it.
And it brings to mind a question that I think Stuart was probably asking.
Yeah.
Like the Castle Freak,
What is the situation with Frankenstein's penis?
Yeah, I want to see that.
Yeah.
We'll see that crank.
So young Frankenstein would have us believe that he has an amazing penis.
But it's not really touched on and probably flesh for Frankenstein.
You know, they had their choice, you know.
Like they didn't have to settle with whatever guy.
I mean, they had their choice of who was recently buried in an Eastern European cemetery.
I don't know that's the best place to go dick shopping.
Do you?
Maybe.
I mean, apparently.
There was a good selection that day.
Yeah.
But Frank doesn't want it.
pushes her away. Meanwhile, the detectives are investigating.
And we learn their relationship that she's the real detective.
She's the sheriff, whereas he is kind of the face who takes advantage of that.
He's a sandwich enthusiast.
He's like, he's the one who will distract the, he'll like charm the local cops while she does the actual work.
Yes.
And Frank is, she's with the bride.
They're on the run.
He assures her that the man from the train is fine, the one that she killed.
And they go to the movies, he steals.
her and says that pretzels were a favorite.
And they go see a movie that is
kind of white zombie and kind of
not. Like it has footage from white zombie.
He wants to go to a dance movie, but she's
already seen that one, so she takes him to a zombie
movie. And they're all wearing 3D glasses, and there's
a couple in front of them where the man is
very loudly pressuring the woman to
have sex with him, I guess, in the theater.
In a crowded theater. In a very crowded
theater. They're jostling people next to them.
And the bride steps in
and the man calls for a monster.
But I wasn't sure what she did that was particularly
monstery there.
I guess, again, it's,
there's something,
I guess it's at this point,
people can just tell by looking at them
their monsters, the audience chases them out
as a mob, and the detectives follow.
The detectives there too.
And the bride, this one, the bride says,
call me Penny, I want to be called Penny.
They escape into a fancy sui-
where this was the funniest part of the movie to me.
They both pretend to be waiters
by picking up trays.
Even though she is wearing a torn dress
and has ink all over her face
and her hair is wild.
He is wearing this mask,
but you can still see that it is.
his coat inside out.
He flips his coat inside out
so you can see the filthy inside of it.
Like that's going to make him seem like more of a waiter.
It's a...
Yeah.
But it works for a little bit.
And who's at this party?
It shows how little regard
rich people have for the server class.
I guess that makes sense.
And they're just stealing things.
He's just taking shrimp and stuffing it in his pocket,
which is a hilarious way to carry shrimp.
I don't want to...
It's so gross.
I don't want to tip my hand about my reaction to this movie.
But if all of the scenes have been more like this scene,
I think I would have liked this movie a lot more.
Especially considering that it ends in them like somehow dance bewitching the crowd.
Yes.
So, well, so it helps that Ronnie Reed is there.
Oh, my God.
Ronnie Reed, Jake John Hall himself.
And Frankenstein is so overcome.
He tells Ronnie, I saw you in the ballbill.
What?
How'd they get him?
How'd they get the Jakester?
There's no way of knowing.
Maybe at a day break from filming Roadhouse.
Probably just came over.
Probably just came over from Roadhouse.
He probably just came over.
I mean, he looks nothing like he does a roadhouse.
He looks half the size
He didn't roadhouse.
Maybe they just deflated him for the day
and then re-inflated him for the day.
Jesus Christ.
You watching the same movie?
I got to say,
so Frank shows up
and he interrupts Ronnie
and he is like overcome.
He's starstruck, yeah.
And he's starstruck.
And I'm going to say,
I love this performance from Christian Bale.
His like level of freaking out
starstruckness.
I have seen people do this.
And it's like,
like so wild.
It feels like he's really, he must be drawing from experiences he's had where people have been
like this.
Yeah.
But what were you going to say to?
And Jake, and like the Ronnie Reed, Ronnie Reed like, you know, he, he takes it and then he's
obviously put off by it.
But I feel like he isn't as big of an asshole as he could have been.
Yeah, there's a version of this definitely where he was like, he's like a total asshole.
Whereas this one, he's just kind of like, I don't know what to do right now.
I'm, I'm looking up right now.
So the movie they go to see is revolt of the zombies,
which I have not seen,
but it uses footage from white zombies.
So that's why that shot of Bella Gozi.
I was like, that's from white zombie.
Thanks for closing that circle.
Oh, man, I just didn't want anyone to write in about it
because it would have been a waste of their time.
So, yeah, Frank is, he does,
Christian Bill does a really great job here of presenting a guy
who wants to make an emotional connection
with a celebrity so badly
and does not recognize that it's not going the way he wants it to.
And he's like, I survived because of you,
and Ronnie brushes him off.
He's like, well, yeah, you're not my type.
And Frank goes into this dance,
and that's when they danced to putting on the writs.
He and the brighter dancing,
the partygoers all start dancing.
Big dance number.
I really like this dance number.
There's a lot of good stuff here.
Audrey came in for just like this scene, basically,
and she's like, how are they doing this to people?
I'm like, I don't know, man.
They're just overcome.
Dan, dancing along with them, like, I don't know.
It's just a thing that happened.
Yeah.
And you're like, well, this is also a,
world where Mary Shelley is a real person and Frankenstein is a real person.
So, and then Audrey was like, oh, like in Don Quixote and you're like, yeah, I guess so, whatever.
Shut up.
Shut up about Don Quixote.
You're always telling me about Don Quixote.
Oh, this is like Don Quixote.
Great, fine.
In the second part of the book, people are reading Don Quixote and they're talking to
Don Quixote about having read his book about him.
Anyway, so.
Trying to shame me about only reading the first half of Don Quixote.
Every night, Audrey's like, hey, Dan, I had a question for you.
What happens in the second part of Don Quixote?
He's like, shut up.
Stop lording it over me.
He's over a table.
So the audience from the movie and all this the detectives enter.
The bride recognizes Detective Wiles from her old life.
And he fights the cops.
He definitely recognizes her.
Yeah.
And the bride gets a gun and puts Ronnie Reed at gunpoint.
And she's like, you got to go get this mob boss Lupino.
He kills women and cuts their tongues out.
And I'm like, this is a weird way to introduce this new information.
It's weird.
With very little...
This was the mob boss
that Ida mentioned
much earlier of it.
Otherwise, he has not been an element
in this movie yet till now.
It is one of the strangest things to me
that this movie about the bride
is also a movie
is also a mob movie.
I was like, why is this what this became?
Because it's in the 30s, so it's also the mob.
I mean, it would either be that
or it was going to bring in
Marcel Duchamp's monumental landmark work
The Bride Strip Bear by her bachelor's even
Also known as the large glass
It had to do one of those two games
I wanted to do one of those things
I thought they went with gangsters
Instead of really engaging with the work of
I'm just going to say it
The most important artist of the 20th century
If you want to engage with it
There's a big retrospective of his work at the Museum of Modern Art right now
I saw it when I was in New York last weekend
Sponsored content
Yeah it's sponsored by my interest in Marcel de Chalm
Anyway so she starts accusing the men in the room of a
She seems to be able to see things that they have done in their past to women.
And she's channeling these angry dead women.
And this is an idea that I wish the movie had done more with.
The idea that all the wronged dead women of the world are now rushing through the bride to try to get justice.
But that kind of has dropped a little bit.
She shoots a cop.
Frank tears down a chandelier, very phantom of the opera.
That's a different monster.
They escape in the chaos.
And Frank is like, I loved it.
That was so impressive.
And she feels guilty.
He's like, no, you're great.
and they start making out,
but then Wiles shows up
and they run away smiling.
Then this is when Frank and the bride
go on a kind of like sex and movies
and driving spree.
And in another movie,
this would have been a crime spree.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Me new is what I was saying.
Yeah.
There's a, so it's just a long montage of them doing that.
Frank gets a tattoo.
They take more pennies from fountains
that's apparently half.
I mean, the 30s you could do that.
You could just,
you could fund your life by pennies from mountains.
And Dr. Euphronius is a gas.
is aghast to discover that women are
dressing as the bride and rioting
as what they call a brain attack revolution.
Earlier the bride said, this is a brain attack.
I do kind of love that. Brain attack is a really
funny thing to shout. She goes,
brain attack, this is a brain attack.
And so they're all like, yeah, this is a brain attack.
Yeah, that's what fucking Professor X says when he starts blast.
He goes, brain attack.
Wheels from behind the corner.
I'd expect this brain attack.
Magneto's like, fuck.
Fuck this guy again with the brain attack shit.
Who's saying that exactly?
Magneto.
Oh, Megita says that shit.
He's like, I got a helmet to protect me from your brain attacks, dude.
He's like, I survive the fucking camps for this.
I don't even write the backstory.
That is his backstory.
That's true, yeah.
So it's the same way that in England, instead of an idea, they call it a brainwave.
And I'm like, that always seems like, they're like, oh, I just got a brainwave.
And I'm like, that sounds way cooler than it actually.
is, you know? Yeah, you just got an idea.
So, uh, so they, this is another thing that's kind of happening away in the background,
but you'd think would be a bigger part of the movie is the fact that women all across America
are essentially rebelling against male society because the bride's example.
But the bride doesn't, it's not really engaged in it. Again, she and Frank are just in this,
a more Frankenstein, you could call it. Um, and so, I feel like this, this is another
example. This movie is a number of these moments and ideas where it feels like, uh, the filmmaker
had like an idea that she wanted to present a like a feminist theme or in uh whatever and the rest
like the rest of the movie doesn't really support it like there's not enough like stuff laid in
there's just like hey we had this big idea we want a champion but there's not enough like
groundwork laid it feels in in a lot of ways it feels i hate to say but it feels fairly an
immature handling of the of the ideas it feels it feels kind of a little messy and not and a little
disorganized.
And it could all be cut out of the movie without affecting the movie.
Yes.
Like the feminist stuff, like it could simply like win later like the tongues getting cut out,
all that stuff.
You could just simply snip it out.
It'd be a shorter and maybe better movie.
Maybe perhaps.
Although I think or I would, I mean, my argument would be like increase that stuff.
Like that's the more, that's more interesting to me than Frankenstein and.
Because eventually what happens, we'll walk through.
Frankenstein, Bonnie and Clyde is.
Eventually and it starts to get a little repetitive.
And there are times where I'm like, I want other things to be happening.
Well, here's something that's going to happen.
That mob boss, Lupino, he meets with the guys who killed Ida earlier.
And they refer to the bride by her full name, Ida Bolinsky.
And he shows off his jars of women's tongues that he collects and just keeps on public display in a bar.
And he's and he kills one of the guys because that guy is, I guess, belittling the situation.
And he tells the other guy, I want the bride's tongue for my collection.
Bump, bum, bum.
I wish they actually did that sound effect when he said.
We go back to Wiles and Molloy, and Wiles is like, the bride, you know, she's not bad.
She had a rough life, and Molloy is suspicious about the relationship he must have had with Ida.
And Maloy realizes, she's pieced together.
Frank and the Bride, they only go to towns where they can see Ronnie Reed movies in the theaters.
So if you just track where Ronnie Reed's movies are playing, you can find them.
So she knows they're going to Niagara Falls.
Slowly they turn, step by step, to the movie theater.
And Molly is like, if we catch them.
My wife makes reference to that all the fucking time.
And she looks at me like, do you get it?
And I'm like, there's no universe where I would have gotten that.
I'm not familiar with what, like an old vaudeville bit?
It is an old vaudeville routine that most people,
I certainly learned it first on the watching the three stooges.
The three stooges.
But it really is just an old vaudeville routine where a guy is referring to,
whenever he hears the words Niagara Falls,
he goes into a trance and remembers something terrible.
And it always ends with him throttling the other.
guy who said neither falls.
But all you ever said is, slowly I turned,
step by step, inch by inch.
And you don't ever learn the story of what happened.
It's such a bizarre routine.
Every time it's been described to me,
I'm like, I don't understand why this is hilarious.
It's like no soap radio.
It's really only funny if you know it's a joke, basically.
There's that Abbott and Costello thing, like the hat company.
Was that just like a take on that essentially?
Do you know what I don't remember that one?
Which one was that?
It shows up in, uh,
the movie orgy, which I know that you're,
you haven't seen yet.
Yeah.
It's just like,
it's like the Calahunga cat
hat company or something like that.
Some funny, like name,
Calahoga Cat Hat Company.
It's not that funny.
And he's like selling this thing of hats.
And everyone he encounters is like,
the Calahoga Hat Company.
And they've got like some like beef with the company
that ends up with them like punching a hole in the hat.
That must be,
I think,
but do they describe what the beef is or no?
I think actually they do in that case.
And it feels like it might be, it might be a take a twist on it where they're like,
oh, but we're actually going to bring some reality to it.
Because then the joke is that, I guess, that every single, he's shilling for a hat company
that everybody hates.
He's never going to sell one of these hats.
But it's a little, Evan Costello would do those routines where they're all old vaudeville
things, but the one where it's like, they're at a restaurant and they don't want the
restaurant people to know that they don't have any money.
So, so Abbott is like, when the waitress comes by, you don't order a thing, okay?
and when the waitress comes by,
she goes, do you want something?
And Costello's like, no, no, nothing.
And I was like, come on, we're here, get something.
Or is it.
All right, all right, I'll have a ham sandwich.
And as soon as the waitress walks away, he's like,
what are you doing?
And he hits him, and he's like, I told you not to order anything.
And then when the waitress comes,
he goes, all right, forget that sandwich, forget that sandwich.
Sure you don't want anything?
Come on, we're here.
Get something to eat.
You're hungry.
Like, and it's one of things where, when you're watching it,
you're like, why is he doing any of this?
He just wants an excuse to hit him.
Anyway, so, Malloy has pieced it together, and she says, if we catch these monsters, I want credit for the bust.
And Wiles was like, I can't promise that.
And Frank and the bride are on their way to Bragra Falls.
He makes up a story about how he proposed to her, but the police pull him over.
The cop starts sexually harassing the bride.
The cop played by Lewis Cancel Me?
Who is that?
His name, yeah, he's in...
That's his name?
Yeah, his name's Lewis Cancel Me.
He's in Killers of the Flower Moon.
That's it.
I recognized him, but I could not remember where I recognized.
He recognized him from.
Sorry, baby, too.
He's always a bad guy.
Yes.
He is a bad guy whose behavior would lead him to get canceled.
True.
He's also in The Penguin doing bad guy shit.
And ironically, in this movie, his name is Officer Goodman.
And he is certainly not a good man.
He's a bad man.
So he's sexually aggressive.
That's his name.
Yeah.
I mean, the me is spelled AMI, but yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
I mean, it was probably like, can chal me at some point.
So, uh, this, this guy is, he's really being a bad man, not a good man.
And, uh, and Frank shoots him.
The bride starts biting his tongue out, uh, in a scene that my wife found gross.
Uh, and then a cop shoots the bride.
Oh, yeah.
It's a full shot.
And then the bride finally gets around to finishing biting the guy's tongue out.
Uh-oh.
Now they're really, really, really, um, what does she do with the tongue?
Sorry.
I think she just spits it out.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Or maybe she starts her own collection.
Much like the scene.
Yeah, you got to start somewhere.
Like the 30s.
In the first issue of Madman
where Madman bites the guy's eye out,
he then spits it out because he's like,
ugh, I don't want this.
It turns out.
Yes, thank you.
Thank you.
Mike All right, if you're listening,
hey, come.
Mike Hart, if you're listening,
huge fan, love your work.
Thank you for making it.
Love it.
I just saw that the big Mad Man omnibuses
are in paperback now,
and I'm definitely going to buy them.
That's great.
So everyone shows up at Niagara Falls.
The detectives,
our people,
Lupino's mob assassin.
Meanwhile, the bride's really hungry,
but she also feels guilty
about biting that guy's tongue off.
And she runs out
and fires her gun in the air
and asks, was I like this before I died?
And then Wiles shows up to help her,
and he calls her Ida.
And he says, this was his fault
and he apologizes.
I'm not, this is never quite fully explained.
I guess he's going to have to read into it.
Oh, no, actually, no,
kind of is, it kind of is.
Yeah, we get the story.
We kind of get the story.
Malloy shoots Frank.
The bride shoots Wiles,
says, don't fuck your witnesses.
In the foot, though.
in the foot, that's right.
Frank gets jealous and they drive off
and the bride is annoyed with Frank
that he lied to her about their past basically.
Now I think she kind of understands her past,
which it turns out, what was it that like
he was investigating?
He was using her as a CI
to build a case against Lupino
by, and he was using women
to infiltrate the gang.
And then the case just got canceled.
Yes, but they fell in love.
Yeah, well, the case got canceled
and she came to him and was like,
Is there any way you can bring it back?
And he was like, yeah, I can.
And using that energy, he started sleeping with her, even though he knew it wasn't going to happen.
Okay.
You remember it much better than I did.
And Wiles is like, I'm resigning, but I'm going to name me you as my replacement.
I don't think you can do that.
Yeah.
He's allowed to do it.
It's like a fucking hedge night over here.
Yeah, exactly.
I got to text you.
I pulled out my gun and tapped it on both of your shoulders.
It's funny is he kind of gives her his badge, I think.
And she used it later and it's like, but that has his number, right?
That's attached to his name.
Like it's, anyway, Franks and church.
He's a different kind of special deal.
He does, yeah.
He's the police department's special little boy.
Maloy, like how it always bugged me in Return of the Jedi when they're like, Captain
Solo, you'll be leading this mission.
Have you picked your team?
And it's like, all his buddies are like, I'll join you, Han.
Yeah, me too.
And it's like, yeah, the cool kids get to choose what mission they're on.
This is literally the most important mission.
the rebellion has ever had
and it's just like, yeah, who wants to be part of the party?
Like, it doesn't matter what your skills are or anything.
So we'll bring along a robot that has to roll in the forest.
We'll bring another robot that just kind of stutter, stelling around.
And that team has been responsible for all of the rebellions.
The results speak for themselves, bitch.
Yeah.
I guess so, I don't know.
That is the A team.
Meanwhile, Luke is like, I could help you with this, but I need to talk to my dad.
I need to give him to my dad.
Dad, he's a good man, even though he's killed probably millions, if not billions of sentience.
All evidence shows he's a bad man.
He's a bad man. Okay, see you later, Luke.
But they're like, he can't be all that bad.
Even though he killed all those other people, he did save his son, the one person he has an investment in.
So he must be a good guy, you know.
Anyway, that's one of my many beefs with Star Wars.
Yeah, wow.
I'm so glad you saved it for our episode on Star Wars.
It's so rare we get to talk about any Star Wars.
things recently. It's so rare we get to talk about Star Wars on this podcast.
So Frank is injured. They get tracked to a drive-in theater, showing another Ronnie Reed movie.
And she's like, he's been shot. How do I heal him? The Power of Movies.
Nicole Kidman lay your hands upon him. Somehow, heartbreak feels good in a place like this.
And Frank admits, hey, we didn't have a relationship. You were a dead lady and I revived you.
And Ida gets out of the car angrily, she throws up.
She renames herself the bride, which is a weird way for her to differentiate herself from the man is to name herself the bride.
Again, unless she is thinking of Marcel Duchamp's the bride stripped bear by her bachelor's even where the bride covers above the bachelors.
And it is very much that she is the one in control of that situation.
Even though they're stripping her bear, they are the ones who are jostling for her support.
And she's in this other realm above them.
So maybe that's what she's referring to them.
Why do they have a bear?
That's a question.
Modern art critics have been debating for decades and decades.
Frank declares his love, licks her throat, proposes to her for real.
She says no.
And then Lepino's guy, I think, shoots Frank in the head.
Yeah, and blast him, you now.
And now the cops are there and she drives off with Frank and the cops chase her.
And he also, when he explained the situation,
he also let her understand that Euphronius can bring a dead person back to life.
which is an important element.
Yes.
In this tightly plotted piece of work.
Thank you.
And Mary Shelley, she's like, I like the name, the bride.
It's like, really?
Because it seems like that, again, would be against what you were going for.
And the bride takes Frank to Euphronius's house.
Malloy tracks them there.
And Euphonius is like, I can't bring him back to life.
And the bride's like, yes, you can.
I love him.
And the Euphronius is like, I had a man I loved.
And I brought him back from the dead.
And he wasn't the same.
So I had to kill him again.
And fucking pet cemetery, huh?
Exactly.
And this is a backstory she should have brought up earlier, I feel like.
When she pretended that she couldn't do it, you know.
And then the mob assassin shows up again, shoots the bride, the police burst in.
They shoot her a lot.
This is very Bonnie and cried.
Until Maloy is like, stop, stop.
Everybody go outside.
And they all listen to her because she's the detective now.
So she's the boss.
She's the sheriff.
And Mary Shelley laughs at the end of the story.
And Euphronius is like, I am not going to bring them back.
or at least acts like she's not going to.
Outside, the cops arrest the Lepinos guy,
even though he basically just did the same thing they did,
which was shoot the bride a bunch of times.
And Malloy looks up to see the...
You're in the arrest for shooting the bride much of time.
You don't have a license to kill.
You may not know that in this county,
shooting the bride a bunch of times is a jailable offense.
Oh, but officer, Officer Malloy.
So Malloy looks up to sees electricity, light up the lab,
and I see Frank and the bride their hands move,
and they hold each other's hands as Monster Mash plays.
Yes.
And then we get, and it was so funny because you hear the,
do, tut, to, do, and I was like,
so this is Monster Mesh, right?
You know, I...
And it was at that point that it really hit me,
I'm like, oh, she's just,
she's playing with every single Frankenstein thing
that she can get her hands on.
So it's like, okay, now I have no more doubts
that she is aware that young Frankenstein exists.
And that when he's singing,
putting on the Ritz, that he did that already in a movie.
And the breakfast scene is to elicit comparisons to
Frankenberry.
Now the thing is,
normally my history with Monster Mash is a little mixed
because I often get angry when Dan McCoy,
out of season, does Monster Mash for karaoke.
That's the best part about it.
If I did it by right of Halloween, it would be as fun.
So there's usually a picture of me in the background frowning or doing thumbs downs.
But I think here it really works.
As someone who danced to Monster Mash at my wedding,
Not my first song.
It was not the first wedding song.
I only advised for you.
But the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, it was the, it was,
it was the second song.
Yeah.
Well, this was, it was later in the night.
Someone else told the DJ to play Monster Mash, and they, because they know me.
But, uh, the, and Dan, as a wedding president, drew a picture of my wife and I dancing with the monsters.
So, so, and it's framed and hangs up in our house.
So, so, but then, Stuart, I was like, going to ask about your history with mid-credit sequences.
Did you see the mid-credit scene in this movie?
Elliot, what the fuck do you think?
My guess is, no, as soon as the credits start rolling, you shut the movie off.
I was on a plane, bitch.
I want to start reading a book.
You're right, you're on a plane.
You don't have the time to sit and see if there's a mid-credit scene.
So the others of us may know that during the mid-credit scene,
Wiles sees all these women dressed up like the bride and they're wielding weapons,
and they've captured Lupino, the gangster,
and there's a pile of tongues in front of him.
They're collecting their own trophies as they hunt through the men who have done them
wrong. And so we see that the, not only of the bride and Frankenstein come back to life,
but the movement she has sparked continues to live.
Whoa, that's pretty crazy.
I should have seen that. The brain attack lived on.
It's almost, I mean, I wouldn't say it as sinners level you need to sit through the credits
or else you miss the movie, but I will say it is getting towards that level.
We're like, well, this is a scene that doesn't have to be during the credits, you know.
So that's the bride exclamation point.
Everyone's alive.
The Monster Mash exists.
and women are running wild,
cut people's tongues out.
The best of all possible worlds.
Yeah.
What do we do next, Dan?
Oh, what we do next is, well, in a way, in a way, sort of we sew up our feelings on the bride.
And where we talk about our final judgments, whether we thought this was a good, bad movie, a bad, bad movie, or a movie we kind of like.
And Keneas, if these are confusing or limiting as categories.
Yeah, I don't see Kenny's being confused by the guest.
I don't feel limited.
I have strong opinions about it.
Yeah, I just, you know, we're used to them.
But the guest maybe needs some clarification.
But anyway, the bride.
I found it to be, I know you seem to like it, Elliot.
I found it to be a bad, bad movie.
Theoretically, I would like this stuff.
And I do respect that Maggie Gyllenhall took a big swing.
I would rather see something like this from movies.
I would rather we get more movies where studios throw a bunch of money at something a little weirder, hoping it might work.
I approve of all that stuff.
The movie itself, I found surprisingly boring for something that has a bunch of nutty stuff happening in it and was irritated by the Mary Shelley stuff and just kind of drifted away over time.
But Elliot, refute me, refute me.
I don't, I mean, I can't refute your own, as, as Robert Orsho says, you are a person sitting
in a theater watching a movie and you can only register your own reaction to that.
You cannot make yourself react in a different way.
But I will say, I went into this being like, I'm not going to like this movie.
And maybe that's why I ended up really liking it quite a bit.
So this is a movie I liked in some way, like this is the kind of movie, for those of us,
for those of you who listened to our Wuthering Heights episode, this is the kind of movie
I wished Wuthering Heights was more like a movie taking big swings that even if it is kind of a mess.
There's a lot of, it feels a little bit like someone is telling you a story and forgetting parts of
the story or remembering it partway through. Oh yeah, yeah, I wanted this to happen too. Oh yeah,
this thing. I forgot about this thing. But it really did take, by the end of it, I was like, this is what
I wanted from, like I said, from Wuthering Heights, it was like taking a piece of existing property and
remixing it in a very different way and playing with it in different ways. And there was such a
like sincerity throughout it
that really got to me.
In some ways,
I hate to say it.
In some ways,
I think I like this more
than the del Toro Frankenstein
because that felt very
straightforward
and very like,
I was not that excited by it.
Whereas this one,
even when it wasn't working,
I was like,
I'm still kind of excited
by seeing what's going to happen.
And eventually it becomes
a little repetitive.
But like,
I ended up really liking it,
if anything,
because of the things
I would normally not like
in a movie,
which is that it's a big old mess,
but it's trying lots of different things.
And also, there was a time in my life
when I would have been like,
that's not Frankenstein or whatever.
But at this point,
I feel about those kinds of characters
the same way I feel about Shakespeare plays.
We're like, if someone does a crazy version
of a Shakespeare play, why get mad?
There's going to be another one.
This thing exists another form.
This is never going to become
the only Frankenstein movie
that people are aware of or know of.
So I'm ready for someone
to take a kind of a wild swing
with these characters.
So I ended up really liking it in ways that,
I mean, it's also like,
in some ways it's like,
She was like, well, I took Frankenstein and I added 1930s
Fred Astaire type musicals.
I'm like, well, you made a movie for me, I guess.
So even though I don't, if you were saying to me,
does this movie work?
I would say no, I don't think it completely works.
But I did like it, you know, in contrast to that, you know.
Stuart, you go.
Give Keneas the last word.
Sure.
I'm going to, I'm going to, I don't think I'm going to agree as wholeheartedly as
Elliott, but I do, this is a movie.
that I kind of like.
I do not think it works.
No.
But I like things.
I like enough things about it.
And it does remind me of like,
like a week,
I mean, I'm going to say like it reminds me of like a weird 90s indie movie
that I'm like expecting it to not,
like a fucking tank girl or something where I'm like,
this is not going to work.
And it's not going to be exactly what I want.
But at this point in my life,
I don't,
I don't want things to be what I want.
You know what I mean?
Like, I want to be surprised.
And I feel like this movie does kind of surprise me in places,
like how large chunks of it just feel like a natural born killer's riff.
But, yeah, I think, you know, a movie I kind of like.
I think, Stuart, that you and Elliot are being so kind.
And I think that's fair.
That's really nice of you to do.
And I, like we've all established, like so many people who were a part of this movie,
To me, it's like adding olives to an apple pie.
You said at this age I don't like things that I like.
And I was like, well, okay.
I don't want to be given what I want.
Yes, you don't want to be given exactly what you want.
But I don't think the surprise olives in this apple pie works.
And I agree with you.
I do not think it works, but I'm still like, okay.
A new experience for Stewart.
I can't, it's one of those things are like,
I can't deny that I enjoyed watching it.
Even though, you did.
I did, even though watching it, I was like,
well, this doesn't make any sense.
Like, what's going on here?
Yeah, the Mary Shelley stuff is like, that's why.
That's the one aspect of it where I was like,
I don't like this at all.
I feel like Jesse Buckley was like,
I saw that in the script and had to do it.
So they kept it in.
Like, I don't know.
It definitely feel, the way that this was described to me
before I saw it by somebody was that it's an actor
directing a movie.
so the actors are given license
just kind of go off and
be as big as they want to be.
And I can see that as a fair criticism
of it. But I also kind of like that a little bit.
A plus, yeah.
And I also, and I can't.
That is totally okay.
What are these choices?
Jesse Buckley, I'm sure you're a nice lady,
but you're doing a lot.
And there's twitching and dancing and she's definitely doing too much.
There's a lot happening in that.
And I, also, we are,
We are feminist in that women are killing men in the streets,
but we're not feminist because men,
anytime she's around dudes,
they're going to try to sexually assault her.
That's just what happens to this movie.
She's existing sexual assault attempt at the club.
She's driving sexual assault attempt by a police officer.
Like, it's constant.
And I'm like, wait, am I as a woman supposed to be enjoying this?
Just seeing another woman in peril all the time?
This isn't fun for me.
I think you're supposed to enjoy seeing those people get killed afterwards, you know.
I don't need to see her dress get torn open a bunch.
That's out there.
Like, okay, so there's the men who she doesn't know.
And then there's the man who she kind of knows who reanimated her, hits her, lies to her for the entirety of their relationship.
And is kind of like, hey, I fucked up your life and you don't really have other options.
So I guess you have to stay with me.
And she's like, I guess I do.
Wow, romantic.
And like that's her,
and that's part of the thing is like that's her like goal.
Like that's the end of the movie for her.
That's her arc.
And I'm like, that feels stupid.
Yeah, I think it's.
And shallow.
It's like, yeah, the movie has like half ideas.
Like it doesn't really have full ideas.
It has half ideas.
And it does, it's not, especially considering,
and maybe it's, maybe it's dealing with the fact that this is not,
it's kind of original subject matter,
even though it's pulling,
and those things, whereas her last movie, the lost daughter,
was so much more coherent.
And it's a much smaller scale movie,
but it's also based on one piece of work, you know?
And so maybe it's, maybe that was easier than for her to build off of that.
I hadn't read the original story, so I don't know.
But it does feel like she's,
there's something very, again, it's something that I admire a little bit,
but you're right, it doesn't work, which is that like,
it's just throwing out kind of half-baked thoughts and not really completing them
or thinking about them.
And I think, I think to defend Elliot and I,
just for our opinions for one moment.
I think you're amazing.
I like you guys so much.
And I'm saying you're...
I'm also saying, I think you're right.
But I think Elliot and I
are a little bit biased by the fact
that we are watching a movie that is bad
for the podcast, but it's bad in a way
that we're not used to seeing
our brains have been warped.
We have suffered a brain attack.
I definitely cannot...
Again, you can't remove your experience
of anything from the context of it, right?
I think this is in the context also
of the last couple of movies we watched for this podcast
were Wuthering Heights and The Mandalorian
and Grogu. And those are movies where I'm like,
I wanted them to be like, here's a new thing
and said I did not get a new thing. So to get
a new thing, even if it's a new thing that doesn't really
work and has a lot of problems, I'm like
what's a new thing? In a way it's like
this is a, this is the negative
comparison, but it's like all those people
who are like, I don't like Trump, but he's different.
He's new, you know.
I don't think this is a new thing, but I believe
if it's a thing that is,
the,
whatever it's,
like,
re-warming or, like,
recooking is different
than what we're used to getting.
Yes,
and there's such,
there's such theater kid energy.
There's a lot of it.
This movie is suffused
with theater kid energy,
which is something that I have come to appreciate
more and more as I get older,
which I found when I was a student at NYU
and was surrounded by theater kids
was not an energy I particularly cared for
when I'm trying to have lunch
and they're just getting up
and shouting songs
from rent at the next table over and I'm like, please, can I just, could I just have lunch without
counting the minutes in a year?
You're getting bullied by theater kids, Ellie.
Exactly.
It was more like, it was more like, it wasn't bullied so much as psychological torture by the
other kids.
But now that, now I feel like there's a, I'm like, you know what, that's, that's an energy
I can appreciate more as long as it's happening on the other side of the screen and they're
right right in front of me when I'm eating, you know.
Probably because a lot of the business now is run by executives who have no theater,
have like negative theater
creative energy.
Yes, well, yeah, that's true too.
I would love if they leaned into that.
Like, if instead of it being a two-hour and seven-minute movie
that's trying to be all these things,
if it had been almost like a visual album
where you have these dance sequences
and movie weird freakouts
and then like ladies shooting people in the street,
I would have been more interested in that than...
I think this would have worked.
It would have worked much better, to be honest, as a play, I think.
You could get away with that stuff more than to play.
If I had seen this, I can very clearly see
when I was younger,
my grandmother used to take me
to the theater a lot.
She had subscription tickets
to a lot of theater companies
and we'd go see new plays
that often did not work.
They were often like a little bonkers
and I could so see
her taking me to a play of this,
of exactly this,
and me walking out kind of liking it
and her hating it
and then spending dinner
talking about why we did or didn't like it
and I think it would have worked better
in that way than it kind of does as a film.
Well also pre-release,
this was sort of,
there was all this word like,
oh, it's a full-on,
And it really isn't.
But if it was, it would have worked a lot better, I think.
Yeah, I think so.
That would have been the fantastic element that really, like, pushes it in a way that's
like, oh, I feel what this is, you know?
Like, it's allowing for this bigness, maybe.
Yeah.
Anyway.
And I think it would have been good if there was more bigness in Frankenstein himself,
who is not as big as he usually is.
Yeah.
You want to get zillicized, Frank?
Yeah, put some, like, shoulder pads on them.
That's too big.
That's, that's Frankenstein Conquer's.
the world-sized Frankenstein where he fights Baragon.
That's stupid.
You know, like, put some, like, football shoulder pads under his coat so he looks really big.
Give him some big boots.
Give him some boots that lift him up.
Come on.
Come on, boots.
Boots lift us up where we belong.
If we're Frankenstein and we're not tall enough.
Hey, are you playing a video game right now?
Maybe you put on a podcast.
while grinding in an RPG.
Or maybe you just don't want to hear that boss fight music one more time.
Been there.
I'm Maddie Myers.
I'm Jason Shriar.
And I'm Kirk Hamilton.
We're the hosts of Triple Click, a video game podcast.
A podcast you can listen to while you do other things.
Like driving or cooking or playing video games.
On Triple Click, we share our thoughts on the latest games.
And breaking news out of the video game industry.
And we also talk about other stuff besides games.
So while you're doing something else,
make sure to check out triple click.
Listen on maximum fun.org or wherever you find your podcasts.
This episode of the Flop House is sponsored by Hymns.
Look, if you are anything like me, two things are true.
One, you are a busy person and you've got things to do in places to be,
and also, two, you are losing your hair.
So you don't really have time to sit in a waiting room,
getting hair loss treatment, talking to somebody in person.
You're a busy man or woman who is losing hair.
You want to do something about it on your own.
or schedule.
That's why Hymns makes expert care accessible on your schedule so you can skip the line
and focus on feeling like yourself again, yourself being someone who has hair.
Hems offers convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with
ingredients that work, including chews, oral medications, serums, I love serums, and sprays.
There are doctor-trusted ingredients like finasteride and monoxidil that can stop for their hair
and regrow hair in as little as three to six months.
There are no hidden fees, no surprise costs, just real personalized care on your schedule as a bebalding individual.
This is something that I appreciate is the chance to be less bebalding, but also to do it in my busy lifestyle.
For simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, ed, weight loss, and more, visit hymns.com slash flop.
That's hymns.com
slash FLOP for your free
online visit.
Hems.com slash flop.
Individual results may vary
based on studies of topical
and oral monocidal and venosteride.
Featured products include compounded drug products
which the FDA does not approve
or verify for safety, effectiveness, or quality.
Prescription required.
See website for full details,
restrictions, and important safety information.
We have a pair of jumbotrons
for you.
I'm seeing a double here.
Two jumbo-trons?
This first jumbotron
is directed at
Bert, and it is from
Luke. And it goes like
this. Robert, congrats
on finishing law school.
Love you, man. Now behold the power
of money as I make Dan speak.
It is I, Dan McCoy,
and this is my real opinion.
Talking heads are overrated,
and I really only know maybe that one song about
arson and that other one about
wacky murderers. Also,
I really did like the introduction of
Walter to the Muppets. Well,
you
cruelly exposed
how I will dance for your dollars.
Yeah.
Dan, just like everyone, is just a little
monkey with a little organ that he's grinding
holding out a can that he hopes you throw a penny
into. Sitting here in the old content factory.
It hurts my heart. It hurts
my heart, but I did it. I did it for you.
You'd think you need to use AI
to make Dan say things they doesn't believe
but no, Dan will do it.
He'll do that job.
I mean, there are limits.
If I object to something morally, we won't be taking that jumbo-tron.
Only one way to find out.
Jumbotron users, find out what Dan won't save for money.
Okay.
I don't like this game.
Anyway, but you know what?
The Jumbotron take it away, but the Jumbotron also give it.
Listen to this next Jambotron.
This message is for Dan McCoy and is from Jim L.
Happy birthday month or maybe belated birthday to Dan.
heart of the flop house. I know Dan has trouble accepting praise. Too bad, Dan, on behalf of all
floppers, many thanks for the steady hand and hard work it takes to keep the podcast going and
for the hoursish of joy, this nonsense provides every week many happy returns.
How sweet. Thank you for that. You know, I will also be paid to say nice things to myself.
You know, Dan, Dan's not very good at accepting praise. And I think sometimes LA and I are a bit
scant with it. So Dan, you are great and you are the beating heart and you also were born
at a date that was recent. He's only doing this because he knows I'm not good accepting it.
And you look very handsome today and I'm proud of you for taking kickboxing classes at Jiggle Studio.
Thank you. That is a true thing that actually happened. Yeah, I didn't invent it whole cloth. I'm not that
creative. All right. Well, let's get back to the show.
Wow. Dan's got to get off the Dan topic, I guess. I thought we were going to peel open this onion.
Before we move on, I wanted to take a moment to tell people that joke farming, how to write comedy and other nonsense, my joke writing book from the University of Chicago Press is now available in audiobook form. Let's say you don't want to read it with your eyes. Let's say you want to listen to my melifluous tones as they read the book to you while you do other things. Now you can do just that.
joke farming the audiobook as read by me the author but i didn't read it that way is available
wherever you can buy and download audiobooks please do uh buy it listen to it share it it is all
of my joke writing wisdom in one place for you and i hope you enjoy let's answer some letters
from listeners oh i'm banging my i'm banging my microphone with uh my phone so excited am i
about these letters double phone microphone and telephone
Thanks for calling out, LA.
Phone meets phone.
Wow.
And only one can win.
Whoever had that on their flop house
play long card?
I guess you, I don't know, you win some box tops.
How does it work?
Yeah, you win the box tops, Dan.
That's the big price.
Well, if you train in the box tops for Flop House script.
There's a lot of steps.
You go to the Flop House company store
where you can get a, where you get a flop house.
house raffle ticket.
You laugh, but people like the
steps of it.
It's like the quest that you're on.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
Very boring quest.
Spoken like somebody who has never
bought a beach style using camel cash.
You're right.
I speak a lot of things as someone
who's never bought a beach style using camel cash.
Roughly everything I say
is spoken in that persona, yeah.
Okay.
letter.
Is the beach towel have the camel logo on it?
It has fucking Joe camel looking cool as hell.
Keep you looking as the camel?
Yeah, yeah, and he's got sunglasses on.
Sure, sure.
He looks like if Chester Cheetah was a camel.
And he smoked and said his eight...
Scrodom candle.
Yeah, he got a strodom candle.
Scrodom candle is what they have at Moop, which is the male version of Goop.
That's what Glenclature's husband sells.
Yeah.
So do you think Chester Cheetah and Joe Camel know each other?
Of course, they're.
They're friends.
They're part of the like mascot pussypossy.
I'm imagining a Tom of Finland-style drawing of Chester Cheetah and Joe Camel having sex with each other.
Is that a thing that exists?
They're both good to have that sunglasses biker aesthetic, you know?
Yeah.
I mean, I'm sure it's out there.
I guess send that to Dan McCoy.
You don't have to.
You don't have to.
I believe it.
I can imagine if I want to.
Yeah.
That's what the Tom of Finland in the Zootopia world would be drawing, that kind of stuff.
Wow.
Yeah.
This letter, that's what we're doing.
Just reminding everyone.
This letter is from Kevin Last Day Withheld, who writes,
I write you at 3 a.m. during my nightly baby watching shift for my month-old newborn.
I am currently in the thick of it and getting very little sleep.
I find myself exploring my hobbies during the darkest of hours from 1 a.m. to 8 a.m.
Beyond listening or relistening to your podcast, can each of you recommend any movies, shows, video games, or books that are easy to pick up and put down at the drop of a hat or sound of a poop?
And aren't so intense that I will feel the need to continue them when I transition to my sleep shift.
The sound of a poop.
Keep plopping, Kevin.
Now that I know the context,
I could recommend the movie I used to watch in pieces
when my second son was a baby.
Yeah.
Which was stalker, the Tarkovsky movie,
which I watched very slowly.
That's a lot.
But I will say, but before I knew the context,
so I would say a couple movies that are very easy
to pick and put down because they're just scenes.
They're not full-length stories.
Some of the movies that Roy,
Anderson, the Swedish director is made.
Songs from the second floor is one of them.
You, The Living is another.
And they're just kind of, they're almost sketch movies.
But they're really well made.
And they're all, each scene is shot from one fixed angle.
And an entire set has been built around the camera, basically.
And they're really amazing to look at.
And some of them are really funny.
And so those are movies where you can like, you watch a little bit, turn it off.
You don't have to carry the story forward because there is no story.
It's just one scene after another.
And it's all in Swedish.
So you can watch it with the sound off if you want.
want with subtitles, so you don't wake the baby.
And when it comes to books, you can pick up and put down.
I just read The Life of Samuel Johnson, and most of that book is just Samuel Johnson and I
went out to dinner and he said these things, and that's it.
So you can just pick it up and put it down.
It's like you're hanging out with your friend Sam Johnson for a little bit, and you put it down
and see him again later.
So what do you guys have for a friend?
When it comes to like reading things that you can pick up and put down, I'm a big fan of,
Oh my lord, my brain just shut down.
Are you going to say the life of Samuel Johnson?
Yes, I did.
No, no, no.
I was going to say the horror comics collections by Junji Ito.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, they're great.
They're nice and short.
That's something that's definitely good for reading in the middle of the night
when you've got a baby to keep staying.
Yeah, yeah, you're going to start seeing.
Sure, this is an odd spirals in your baby's.
His poop is in a spiral.
Oh, no.
That'd be so concerned.
Have you left upon you?
Have we talked about the
the Junjito cat comics?
Those are the best.
I only have seen those.
I think, yeah, they're really great.
Have you seen, did you read the one?
You've seen Judge Ito's cat comics?
Yeah, after the OJ. Casey was starting
the cat stories.
He started doing the cat strip.
Yeah, yeah.
He's called Judge Cat.
He stands in front of a brick wall and he's like, hey, cats.
Stuart, have you read the Jogito one where it's the, it's the thing that
turns people into like gas-powered mechanical crabs or something and there's a shark with
robot legs that's running around eating people?
That's a crazy one.
Yeah, yeah.
Here's an idea.
If you're going to read something, you know, in the middle of the night that you want to be
sort of bite-sized, why not read something that's already sort of chopped up in bite-sized?
This is heavily influenced by me looking over at my own.
bookshelf, but like get yourself, if you're a listener to this show, you probably like movies.
You could get yourself like an old collection.
You could get yourself an old collection of Pauline Kale or Roger Ebert, like reviews, something like that.
There's like some great books that Bleeding Skull put out that I liked about horror movies of the 80s and horror movies in the 90s where you can just kind of dip in and read some blurbs about things.
And it doesn't take a lot of mental energy, but you know, you're like half learning.
You're learning silly stuff.
Canis, do you have any ideas?
Sure.
As a person without children, that seems really tough what you're going through.
And thank you for your service, I guess.
Great, great that other people do that.
I'm so happy for you guys.
Keeps the human race going.
Yeah, thanks, Elliot.
I mean, whether that's a good thing or a bad thing, you know.
Yeah.
I am a very big dorky lady.
And I have started listening to Stephen Fry's.
He has one on Greek mythology, Greek heroes, the Troy and now the Odyssey.
And the stories are quite short because they're the stories of Greek mythology.
And it's just a British, I listen to the audiobooks.
It's just a British man kind of chill.
Like, chill, he tells you about some stuff that didn't really happen, but you get it.
And it's nice.
It's really nice.
Yeah.
Hey, that makes me think of like just Stephen Frying mentioned.
Pick up a Jeeps and Worcester collection.
The short, short little stories.
Yeah.
Make you laugh.
Anyway.
This is from...
Yeah, that's how I feel about friends.
Just watch the whole series room of friends.
Short little stories that'll make you laugh.
Yeah.
You don't have to be invested the whole time.
It's fine.
Yeah, why not?
This next one.
letter that is, is from
W. Seth Hansiak first name
withheld. Oh, okay.
You know, breaking the pattern here.
Interesting choice. I recently watched
the decidedly mid-horror film
Terror, sorry,
which was a bad, bad movie, until a bit of
dialogue made me laugh out loud.
All right. The dialogue is,
the death card can mean an ending
or a beginning, but in this case,
it just meant death.
Transforming it into a good bad movie.
Yeah, yeah.
That's a line like, that's a podcaster line where they're like,
I just want to say something.
When that same line was used as the Gotcha Final Girl smack talk line,
I literally cheered.
What line of dialogue transformed a movie for you in either direction?
Keep on flopping.
From W.S.
Let's see.
That's the sound the bear makes.
was pretty good.
Oh, yeah.
That's just the sound, the sound of bear makes.
What was that?
Which one was that from?
One missed call, I think.
Yeah.
It's just the sound.
The sound the bear makes.
I thought this was a more interesting letter than I had a great answer for it.
Because I don't know that I feel like a single line is transformative to me in that way, usually.
Usually not enough to really make or break a movie.
I couldn't really think of anything for this
when I was thinking about it earlier
but I thought about, I've talked to this before
that the movie, hell in the Pacific,
the final seconds of that movie
ruined that movie.
And otherwise up to then,
I think it's a really strong movie
and then a choice of how to end it,
literally like it's the last 30 seconds of the movie.
I'm like, well, this movie's bad now.
So that kind of stuff happens sometimes.
What does like Walter Mathau make a face at the camera or something?
No, that's the perfect way to end the movie, Stuart.
There's no better way to end the movie.
No, that's great.
There's certain line readings that stick with me that, like, elevate a movie that I already like, that I'm, like, I mean, maybe not elevated, but, like, stick with me forever.
Like, you know, obviously, in Clue, there's no funnier part in Clues than Flames, Flames in the Side of My Face.
Yeah, that's the way that, like, just, like, brings the movie up to a different level.
A movie I already like.
What a banger.
I already love is romancing the Stone, but Stuart and I often talk about.
You and your sister.
Wilder, you and your sister can go.
This is the line reading I love.
I just love to think about it.
But I don't have like, yeah, it doesn't shift everything for me.
Yeah.
When you read that, I thought of, would that it were so simple?
Oh, yeah.
Me and my sister say that to each other all the time,
and that made me lock into that movie way more than I had been before.
Yeah, no, totally.
Stewart's thinking
I don't got anything
We can move on
That's okay
You don't have to force it
You know
We're allowed to
We're allowed to
It's our show
Just cut me out
Alex
Cut me out
So I don't mess up the flow
No no no
He's important
You know what
Yeah he's not pulling his weight
You know
Yeah I provide a nice low bar
For everyone else
To look better by
Yeah
Uh
Hey let's
Let's recommend
Some movies
Movies
That may be
a better use of your time.
If you have a limited time, maybe you prioritize these.
That's true.
That's what makes life so sweet, Elliot.
That's true.
If we lived forever, it would lose its savor and flavor.
Yeah, exactly.
Savor and flavor.
That's one of those great lines I'll remember from this podcast.
It switched it in my mind.
Okay.
So, pardon me.
Yeah.
I just as I was about to give my recommendation, I had to burp.
I was texting you about this movie, Elliot.
Because it was on Criterion, I rewatched Close Encounters of the Third Kind.
You were texting me about that.
That's true.
Yeah, for the first time since I think I was like a teenager maybe, like I watched this movie.
And it's a movie that, you know, by the time I was watching it,
it came out the year before I was born
by the time I was watching
it was already like enshrined in like
this is like classic
science fiction movie
this is classic early blockbuster
like the real blockbuster
wave you know
and seeing it as a kid
I had certain expectations of that
that were maybe not fulfilled
like the movie is kind of a weird movie
if you're looking for like what we now think of
I mean we just talked about the bride
so like close encounters is
Not that weird.
No, I know.
But, like,
if you're talking about,
like,
big blockbuster entertainment,
it's,
it doesn't offer the same,
like,
simple satisfactions,
maybe that,
uh,
you expect.
And I think that that meant that was a movie
that I didn't quite get as a kid.
It's also speaking to,
like, being older and,
like,
being presented with,
like,
uh,
you know,
something new in life that you didn't ever expect to,
like,
be part of your life.
Uh,
but,
I don't know,
watching it.
It's like an affair movie.
It's like he's,
he's having an affair with aliens.
With aliens.
with aliens.
And it's brought the savour and flavor back into his life.
There's no like wisecracking kid characters.
There's no like animated dinosaurs.
Well, and you know what you're saying about it being like an affair with aliens.
It speaks to the fact that like this guy is not acting like great towards his family.
No.
Like this guy is going nuts.
He's scaring his family.
And we sort of understand why because we are also curious about the aliens.
But he's not handling it in a way that you're like, oh, what a great guy.
No, I mean, spoiler.
It ends with him abandoning.
Earth and his family to be with these aliens.
So like it is a...
But like, come on.
Come on.
Well, that's the thing is...
His family are kind of duds, right?
Terry Gar?
Come on.
Terry Gar, sir.
That's Dustin Hoffman level mistreatment of Terry Garcer.
Wow.
As seen in the movie, Tootsy.
So the...
Spielberg has talked about how...
I mean, I love Close Encounters.
I think it's great.
And Stephen Spilberg has talked about how
that's the movie of the man he was then.
And now as the man he...
something he said years later after he had a family.
He's like, yeah, I couldn't get on a spaceship
and fly day and leave my family behind.
But as a young man, yes, sure, cool.
Like, let's leave it all behind. Yeah, yeah.
Well, I think part of my switching around was like...
There's also in the very 70s about it.
Yeah, man, go with the aliens.
Come on.
Do what do you want.
Be you.
No, I mean, like, it has like a realism
and open-endedness that I responded to more now.
It is like, but also,
Also, I was thinking, like, oh, I saw close encounters, you know, back when everyone had tiny televisions.
And now technology, you know, has come down and priced so much that, like, people can have big, beautiful, like, screens that, like, show a movie like close encounters in a way.
They're like, oh, right, that's why it's so impressive.
Like, this is a gorgeous movie.
Considering, considering the, probably whatever digital version you were looking at, it probably looks better than it would have looked if you had seen it in a theater.
when it first came out,
because you'd still be seeing it being projected
by probably some teen idiot who doesn't know what he's doing,
you know,
and there's a lot of babies crying in the theater.
Projection is getting roasted over here.
His screen is all stained and ripped.
Catching a straight.
No, I'm just kidding.
Anyway.
I'm just kidding.
I'm just kidding.
Projectionists are great.
It's not a surprising recommendation that close encounters was,
but I enjoyed it.
I loved revisiting.
Stuart, what would you recommend?
So I've been traveling a bunch
And I haven't gotten to go to the movies
And I've been desperate to see a certain
Liminal Space Horror movie
But I have not seen it yet
I'm seen it this week
So instead I'm going to recommend a different recent
Liminal Space Horror movie
And that is Exit 8
The Japanese movie based on a video game
And it is awesome
I really loved it
It's about a guy who's on a subway train
And he gets off at a station
that's unfamiliar to him,
and he kind of loses bearings,
and then suddenly he realizes that he is trapped
in some kind of weird loop of corridors
in this subway station.
And there are some rules to it,
and the idea that it is adapted from a video game
that I've never played, so I don't know much about it.
But I feel like it's a pretty novel concept of adaption,
and I thought it was really,
interesting and fun and it manages to be unsettling and scary without relying on gore or really
many like traditional scares. I thought it was, it was really great. I also watched a liminal horror
movie recently, but it was a horror movie about the liminal state of old age. That's right. I'm talking
about the straight story, starring Richard Barnsworth, which I thought I had seen this
movie and I didn't remember it particularly well.
So I'm wondering if maybe I didn't see it
when it first came out.
But it's a, it's on Criterion Channel right now.
And it's such a great, sweet movie.
And it's so like, it feels like the same way that Spike Lee made Inside Man to be like,
I can make these kinds of movies as well as anybody.
I just don't want to.
That's why I'm not making them.
It feels like David Lynch is like, I can make a movie without weird stuff in it.
I just don't want to.
Look at how well I do it.
Now I'm back to my own stuff.
But it feels, it's such a, it feels so much like a,
David Lynch movie without falling on the like tropes that have, you know, that people expect from
David Lynch movies.
And Richard Farms was so great.
And it's such a, it has its own kind of tempo that you, that you fall into.
And the way that the main character unfolds over time and you learn more about him in little
pieces and things, just really great.
And I, watching it, I was so, I admired so much how they didn't try to like movie up the story.
That it's like, you know, the story is this guy who is, he's an old man.
he can't drive a car anymore.
His brother lives 350 miles away
or 370 miles away
and his brother had a stroke
and he wants to go see him.
So the only way he can get there
is to ride his riding mower
for hundreds of miles
and just the people he meets along the way
and it would be so easy
to make this movie and put in like
and he's got,
this other person has to come along with him
and they have to learn to get along
or people hear about it
and suddenly he becomes famous
and there's a media circus following him
or he gets mistaken for a criminal
or something like that.
Yeah, that happens.
Yeah, it's just about this, it's just about this old man, like having to deal with being old
and kind of just having interactions with people along the way, but none of them are like
so incredibly dramatic that they, you know, that they become what the movie is about.
And I just, it's a really beautiful movie.
And, but you watch it the whole time, you're like, yeah, this is a David Lynch movie.
Like, it's also really funny.
It feels like one of his movies, but without having to do with dreams or weird sex stuff.
So that's the straight story.
I highly recommend it.
It's technically a G-rated movie
that I would not recommend showing it to kids
because they will be bored by it.
I've never seen that movie.
And I'm going to be honest, vulnerable.
I don't really like a lot of David Lynch movies.
But the way that you pitch that,
this may be the one for you.
I would say try it.
It definitely, it's like,
it's at his kind of pace.
It's like the kinds of characters
that he deals with sometimes.
But it is not,
but there's nothing.
strange or supernatural or dreamlike about it.
It is just like, if there's anything dreamlike about it,
it's just kind of like you kind of get into a dreamtran state,
just driving a riding lawnmower through Midwestern states
where there's not a lot going on.
But it's really, it's one of those movies too where you watch it.
And afterwards you're like, oh, it makes me feel good about kind of like people.
You know, like people, you know, that people like to be around people.
And anyway, it's really good.
I do recommend it.
Yeah.
Just be ready for a lot of shots like kind of drone or hell.
I guess it would have been helicopter shots at the time.
Helicopter shots of cornfields.
Like, you're going to see a fair amount of those.
Make me feel like it at home.
Kinesse, do you have a recommendation that you want to offer?
Sure.
Based on this movie, I thought of a Frankenstein-based movie that I enjoyed more.
Impossible.
Impossible.
This one is very silly, and it's not trying to say anything about the nature of feminism in this country.
Lisa Frankenstein.
It's a young girl who,
accidentally brings back a Lord Byron type guy.
I can't believe that's his name.
Yep.
Sure.
A Lord Byron type guy.
Arthur, Lord Byron type guy.
Yeah, something like that.
And then they kind of fall in love and he has to get a penis.
As you do.
Yeah.
Part of the process.
It's funny.
It's silly.
It's quirky and it doesn't take itself nearly this seriously.
As seriously as the bride.
That's one of the main.
I'm going to watch for a while, and I haven't gotten around to watching it.
So you know what, Denise, you're going to trade movies.
We're going to watch each other's recommendations.
I'm going to write you and be like, I loved it.
Or, wow, I'm really disappointed in you personally.
So, recommending this to me.
Your taste in movies determines your value as a human.
Yeah, exactly.
That's the premise of this podcast in some ways.
Yeah, yeah.
It's true.
The Internet has taught us that the only thing that matters is about you is the things you like or don't like
and nothing about your intrinsic qualities otherwise.
Yeah, yeah.
That's all my therapy sessions are about.
Kenes, thank you so much for being with us.
Before we go, is there anything you would like to plug?
I looked it up.
This should be released on July the 11th,
if that affects plugging.
I was going to plug the same thing unless you said it came out in September.
I want to plug your best deal day show.
We're just going to make it in time for your best deal day show, yeah.
I would.
The Hot Guy Draft, tell us about it.
Tell us about it.
So the Hot Guy Draft is a comedy competition of thirst,
wherein people, comedians, on stage,
create teams of pop culture, hot guys.
And that's gender neutral.
It's also irrespective of if they actually existed,
if they're cartoons, if their historic figures, whatever.
And they create a team of hot guys in different categories.
And the audience votes on who has created the hottest team.
This time the theme is First Crush.
So we're going to be looking at who we had crushes on
when we were younger.
Robin Hood,
cartoon Fox.
That cartoon Fox is on the poster
for the show.
Enough people have said
the Fox from Robin Hood
changed me.
Someone recently said to me
they go,
they go Zootopia
probably pretty much started
that furry stuff
and I'm like,
no sir,
not at all.
It goes back much farther.
Absolutely.
We haven't even started talking
about the live action
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.
If you're into April in that,
she's,
or I guess.
Raphael is a big thing in that movie
Gadget Hack French.
Yeah, sure.
That's his name?
No, that's the mouse from a...
That's the mouse from Rescue Rangers.
That's pretty cool.
She was like the girl next door crush.
If you went to crush on a cartoon mouse, yeah.
Yeah.
That makes sense to me.
We're going to get into some deep waters now, so let's start talking.
But that is on August 23rd at Littlefield at 7 p.m.
You can get your tickets now, but you can also, because this is built off of a fantasy sports draft
and those people have stats, to build stats, we have an online survey where you can vote on the hotness
of different figures, and then we use that in our rankings.
So please visit Hot Guy Draft on Instagram for information about that survey, information about tickets,
and the cultural work that we're doing to investigate what people find hot and why.
I, this is right up my alley.
I love it.
Dan, see if Gomez Adams is on there.
I will after.
I'm adding him after this.
I don't think he is.
He should be.
I mean, they're all Julia.
Yeah.
Come on.
I'm just saying there's other Gomez Adamses and they're all pretty attractive.
I know, but come on.
John Aston is a very hot Gomez Adams in some way.
He's a hotter.
He's a hotter.
He's not hotter than Raul and Julia.
Sure.
I mean, Raulia was M. Bison for him.
Yeah.
Yeah.
For me, it was Tuesday.
Okay.
Well, this has been a delight.
It's also been the flop house.
We'd like to thank our network.
It's called Maximum Fun.
If you go to Maximum Fun.org, you can check out a lot of other great podcasts,
comedy and culture.
Artist-owned, listener-supported.
You're going to hear that after the theme song.
But I said it now, too.
Thank you to Alex Smith.
Our producer.
ears are here in double.
Four outros.
Thank you to our producer, Alex Smith.
He goes by the name Howell Doughty on the internet.
You can listen to his music or his podcast or check out a Twitch stream, a lot of great
stuff that he does.
Get his merch.
Why not?
Hey, and speaking of plugs, why don't we plug some of our own stuff like the newsletter,
which I don't mention quite enough?
No.
If you go to the, if you go to the, uh, well,
website. We have a newsletter.
You can subscribe. And a couple times a month, you will get updates on what we're up to in a more
extensive form. And there'll be something funny in there, too, that's not just advertising.
And also, there's a Discord. People know about the Facebook and the Instagram and stuff,
but they don't often know that there's a Discord. Check that out. I wish I could remember
how you get there.
I decided to mention it, and I hadn't done the research.
So listeners, ask Dan's grandchildren how to get onto the Discord.
I'm sure it's not that hard to figure out.
But for the flop house, I have been, Jan McCullough.
I'm Stuart Wellington.
And I'm Elliot Kalin, and we've been joined by Canis Mowley.
Bye.
Bye.
Orva.
Bride.
I got questions about Hockai draft.
I will answer every single one.
I'm going to try not to be too enthusiastic about it.
Okay.
Yeah, please don't.
I'm just going to tamp it down.
The flop has the chills.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
We're all trying to out-cool each other on this one.
Man, the bride, whatever.
Not really the kind of movie that you have a strong opinion about.
Exclamation point, get that out of here.
Put an ellipsis on the end of that.
Please.
Okay.
Let's start.
recording.
We did.
Just to see if we remember how we do it, you know?
Well, the actual show.
Hold on.
Let me, uh, okay.
This is a classic Dan.
Okay, let's start.
Um, all right.
How we, uh,
my brain, uh,
goes ahead of its actual capabilities.
It's the problem.
I think I got a hot one, guys.
Oh, okay, a hot one.
Great.
Hold on.
We should have light in here.
What am I doing?
No, it should be dark.
But just like the world of the bride.
Wow.
There we go.
Yeah.
That's better.
I mean, it was the fucking 1930s, dude.
It was a very dark time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You had monsters running around.
Yeah.
Trying to go on dates.
Like Jake Jill and all.
One monster.
Yeah.
What he did to Taylor?
Yes.
Thank you.
Finally somebody spoke up.
If only that had been expressed creatively in some way, but it just never happened, you know.
Again, I can't stress enough.
Taylor Swift's concerts in Melbourne
made my hotel Costco very high
so I wish he stole a million
scarves from this picture.
That would give her a million albums.
I like do it. I don't know. Anyway.
She can afford.
Maximum fun.
A worker-owned network.
Of artists' own shows.
Supported directly by you.
