The Flop House - The Flop House: Episode #120 - The Paperboy

Episode Date: February 9, 2013

0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 40:59 - When we were paperboys, we remember a lot less rough sex.41:00 - 42:38 - Final judgments42:29 - 54:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:33 - 1:03:00 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:03:01 - 1:06:55 - The gang's an asshole to Dan, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

In this episode, we to the flop. What's up, Dan? Hey Stewart. I'm Dan McCoy. Yeah, I'm Stewart. Wellington. I was waiting for the last day. Not a different Stewart.

There's only one. We can try and sneak one in. No, and I'm Elliot Kaelin. What's up? That's it fellows. It's not like it didn't have like a funny thing to do. I mean a little bit. It's sort of Well, you like under company. I mean you want me to really hand it out to you. Oh, why? Who's this over here? Elliot? That's not starch. That's yeah. See, that's how we're going to satisfy you guys. So what are we going to do for the floppaus?

I'm either going too low or I'm going too high. Come on. Welcome to the floppaus. We watch movies here. Welcome to the mouse house. Your home for questions about mice problems. Let's go to some viewer mail. This one goes out to Dan.

It says Dan. I know you say that glue traps are the most humane way to kill an animal. But what if it's not? Dan, you want to reply to that? It takes you not the most humane way. That's totally different from what you said last week on the mouse house. The mice are alive and they're terrified. But that's sad. It makes me think of it one time that I actually had to deal with some mice and some glue traps. Yeah, let's not talk about sad stuff. Let's talk about the movie The Paper Boy.

The closest movie ever. This is a, this is a podcast where we watch bad movies. We talk about it. We watch a little film called The Paper Boy. Little written and directed by Chris. Well, of course. A director, Lee Daniels. Now, do you mean he's a, he's a precious director

the way Wes Anderson can be a little too precious sometimes? No, I mean, he directed the film. Or do you mean he's a precious director the way Wes Anderson can be a little too precious? No, I mean he directed the film. Or do you mean he's been driven mad by a ring? Pressure. That he calls it precious. A novel push by Sapphire. Oh yeah. Starring Monique. Mow apostrophe, Nick.

Yeah. It stands for Mormon, Nick. So but we didn't watch precious. We did not watch precious didn't watch precious space on the novel, push by Sapphire. We watched, uh, what, the paper boy? The paper boy, based on the novel, the paper boy. Which was in turn based on the, the novel, the game, the Nintendo video game. Well, here's the thing, the weird thing is they really took the source material in an odd direction because the video game, paper boy, your paper boy paperboy you throw papers you try to get him in the mailbox

sometimes you break a window somebody yet runs at niels at you maybe a dog chases you yeah this they took that main character of the paperboy and they put him into a weird lured southern gothic this is the kind of talking about earlier yes bizarre soap opera which I don't remember from the game no yeah it doesn't exist in the it's like if they made a movie like a junk yard it's like they made a movie of duck hunt and it's all about how that dog that catches the ducks was really like a lot of money for mob so he has to become a prostitute is that why he's always

giggling at you when you fuck up yeah yeah well that's because he's practicing to be a gay sugar all get that money back so you can escape the mob he is giggling from behind a coy hand. Yeah, like this. He he he. Uh, I did it in the first time. Anyway, I really want to have sex with that dog.

And that dog is what the Makato was based on. I think I didn't see the movie Topsy Turvy, but I assume that it's all about how Gilbert and Sullivan were playing Duck Hunt and got the inspiration for the Makato. With the Paperboy, the actual film, the Paperboy film the paper boy starring oh, it's an also a cast Zac Efron Zac Efron Nicole Kidman Nicole Kidman The man was bitten by radioactive kid and that was all the powers of a child Matthew McConaughey

And the Raven himself John Q. Sex. Oh, he played at Graham Poe didn't play the Raven raven himself shank you say what played at graham poet in play the raven scott glen is in it and also the bad guy from r i's the plan of the apes is in this and macy gray and macy gray is in the scene okay here's a movie she's plastered all over this thing let's just say off the bat you can macy gray vehicle everyone talks with a heavy southern accent you can understand maybe thirty percent of the dialogue in the movie macy gray is the least understandable and she's the narrator of the film.

Yeah, and a framing device that is kind of abandoned after the beginning. Well, it starts with her being interviewed by somebody, and then she narrates through the movie. You never find out who's interviewing her. Her narration is basically- We the viewer, I guess. She does- I guess- She does a lot of telling you things that the character would never know and also telling you things that would be more easily told to you Just do scenes where those things happen but possibly by people who don't speak with a crazy mumbling action. Yeah Let's just say right off top of that

this is Southern trash at its high at its lowest point. Let's call it. There's a, and uh, it, I mentioned to Dan near the end of the movie that this felt like something that Tennessee Williams pooped. Like if he did, it was a move. Yeah. This, it would be the paperboy. Yeah. Like it's alive sort of situation. It's alive was a baby. It was a poop. I gotta watch it. It's lot again. Let's pause the podcast. You think about shits alive. The knockoff of it's a lot of glad you did made that joke. That's really good. So should we try to sum up the happens in this

poch poch house? Yeah, I can't wait to send you to Synopsize. It's difficult because this is like a Dickens novel. There's so many characters, so many plots. Let's start with the beginning. Macy Gray is a made-slash cook for a Southern family. Slash narrator. Slash narrator. She narrates the lies. She's breaking the monopoly that people with good voices have on narrating things.

Ouch. You're Morgan Freeman's, you're James Ertels Jones, you're Verner's, Herzog, exactly. Yeah. This was like, there were times during this one, it was like, couldn't they have found Mickey Rork to do this? Couldn't they've gotten the Dictracy villain mumbles

to narrate this? Couldn't they've gotten someone on the other side of a phone talking through a handkerchief to the mirroring? Couldn't they get someone like and stick a bunch of towels in their mouth and have them narrate it? Couldn't they get Eliza Doolittle from the scene where she has a bunch of marbles in her mouth?

Why couldn't they get like a kid who doesn't speak English and have him talk through a trumpet. And then he could narrate the movie. So anyway, so she's she works for this family and she narrates the movie. Zach Efron plays Jack a paper boy. His dad owns the newspaper in this scene in Southern town. Let's just call the town Hicksville. I don't remember what it's called, but everyone there is a super redneck head. Sweatsburg. So, mumbly sweatsburg.

I think it's Moat County or Moat County. Yeah, it is I think Moat County. Now, this is, the year's 19th. Name for the large moat ringing the castle. Yeah, because, because the seltakes all the actual words that it has to say that castle. Because the feudal lord is inside that castle.

It's 1969, a turbulent time in America especially this happened in the past yes Do you think everyone was just really retro in the clothes? No, I thought it was like a Wes Anderson movie They all have black my TVs. No one news is a telephone that doesn't have a wire attached to a wall Hey, man. I really hit down the South man. Yeah, that was cool So continue. So Zac Efron he was a swimmer in college, but he got kicked out of college for a prank where he drained all the water out of the pool now He's working as a paper boy home in the sweatiest grittiest town below the Mason Dixon line and frankly above the Mason Dixon line probably His dad has a girlfriend that his that he doesn't like and that really doesn't

enter into the movie ever at all but she's a character. Now, she's from New York I think. She mentions she's from New York and she is, it's one of those things where everyone in the movie is a kind of horrible Southern caricature but she is somehow worse than them and she's the character that they can all feel is the bad guy, yes. Now, Zach Efron's brother is Matthew McConaughey, his name's Ward, and he has a sidekick who's a black guy named Yardley. And the two of them are writers for, like,

the Miami Times, and then they guess they're in Florida in the movie. It's this is like Northern Florida where it's really super Southern. Ironically, this Northern half of Florida is more Southern than the southern half of florida what are you gonna do

far to the cookie state anyway so they come to this town because a man has been thrown in jail for a murder he probably man he probably didn't commit now the murder was of a a sheriff who they say

was slash to his belly was slash open and he walked a mile with his intestines hanging out which yeah and we meet the sheriff don't really see that though by the way you know we just see why they're in black and white and this inciting incident is given no weight in the movie no we don't know what's happening we don't know anything about the sheriff it's totally spoiler alert his murder really remains unsolved literally in the movie say no one ever knows who killed the sheriff now the man who is wrongly convicted is no one knows who can't kill the sheriff the guffin now so the man who come supposedly come in the murder is john kiosk in his wormyest performance ever and this is the performance we wanted in the Raven is sweaty

Mumbly disgusting. He's just a perverted mess. He's a monster. He's possessed by the spirit of Randy Quaid It's like he's like if Randy Quaid and a naked mole rat It's gotten to like a transporter from the fly and then switch bodies and they screened Bad lieutenant port of call New Orleans and like i could do better i could do that it doesn't feel like junk use act it feels like everyone in this movie thought this was their chance to do a nicklaus cage performance it's like i wouldn't expect it to be close to credit in the credits as acting coach uh... this movie because this is it over the top mumbly crazy movie now okay so i i skipped the fact that the cold kidman

has started a letter writing romance with John Q's act and through his letters, she is one so totally sexually turned on by him that she too believes he's innocent and she's gotten in touch with Matthew McConaughey and Yarlie and brought them to the town to write an article investigating right and article proving John Q's acts innocence. I mean, she's kind of a free spirit. I mean, it's not like his words have driven her mad with passion. No, no.

Nicole Kidman's character is one of these like Southern, Belle, Diva, trailer trash. Like a Nympho type. Nympho? Yeah, the kind that looks like a baby doll type character. But if it's like the girl from baby doll, like aged 30 years, 30 years, 30 years in the future. And now she's got like, she's your trailer park femme fatale. Yeah, basically.

Trailer, calling her trailer park femme fatale, if fatale is giving that character, when we're credit is a rounded character, then she actually is. But anyway, Zack Efron has a crush on her. He really wants to do it. And she is inappropriately affectionate touchy with everybody.

And. There's a lot of scenes of them kind of like looking at each other, being all sweaty. There's a lot of scenes in this movie. Mumbling shit at each other. Yeah, sweaty in a room, mumbling shit. And then the narration will say like, then they investigate it and found some clues.

And then the next scene will be just them talking. And you're like, well, why do you show me them finding the clues? It's like, the movie is deliberately narrating the important parts of the movie, and then showing you the boring parts of the movie's cutout. Most of the scenes feel like we're watching right before the cameras get turned on. And there's still like, maybe rehearsing a little,

maybe blocking out the scene, maybe talking about what they did that weekend. Workshop shopping their characters. Yeah, and then it's like as soon as they were like okay Lee we're ready to start running the script pages and Lee did it. Oh we ran out of film. Oh no no we're out of film. We gotta do this and there's a lot of. He keeps accidentally turning it off when he thinks he's turning the camera on. Yeah before I get to the scene where they all go to fix it all post. Before I go get to the scene where they all go. Because he layers it. No, he adds a lot of layers. They go to visit John Kusak in prison and John Kusak. This is the best scene. Meanwhile, four people are sitting there and John Kusak. John Kusak tells Nicole Kidman, okay, spread your legs open.

Now rip open your pantyh. Okay now start touching yourself and John Q's act through his pants masturbates himself to ejaculation. Well he doesn't ever touch his himself like I don't think I think you just like the raw power of Nicole Kidman. And Nicole Kidman is literally singing my pain. Just opening her mouth like oh Like you wanted to see a movie where you see a movie don't watch the favorite Where you literally see the cold kid man's legs spread wide open and she rips open her pantos and then she She filates that he says he says do show me what you do with your mouth like you said in the letters and he

She filates the air basically and the other characters in the scene are supposed to be super turned on by this. But they'll kind of just like seem like they're like, should we leave her? The reactions run the gamut from awkward to bored. But I we should mention that this movie is it's like Lee Daniel said, I'm going to shoot this movie like it was a trashy movie made in the late 60s. And so he's throwing in all these techniques like zooms and just super tons of dissolves and like a camera that doesn't look at the people who are talking. It's like he took like the worst things about Robert Altman and like what Texas chainsaw massacre, I don't know. And through them into a blender,

and then add it a little bit of, you know, like some kind of, you know, 60s beach party movie. Well, yeah, like, I don't know, it reminds me of some of Vincent Gallo's worst moments too. Yeah, yeah. I think like a, you know, your low rent black exploitation films as well,

there's a little bit of that. I mean, the whole movie, but it draws on all these, like, it draws on all these trash influence influences and then like these already influences, like it's got this aldman side, it's got this Terrence Malak side, but. It's also got this John Waters,

or like early John Waters aspect to it. Yeah, but it neither has the clarity of like the artists, nor does it actually have the skill of the exploitation. The skill or the meaning? Like there's a reason John Waters is doing stuff to shock and break specific boundaries. The reason Robert Altman is doing what he does is to create a sense of atmosphere. And I'm also saying that exploitation films are shot better than this. He's borrowing these techniques, but he's fucking them up.

And he has no idea what he's doing with it. It's like, I just throw a bunch of techniques in here and it'll work. And if you borrow all these techniques from all these different sources, and then he does this, and then he forgets what makes any of those things fun. Yeah.

He saps everything that makes it fun and interesting, and just leaves a dull, worst elements thing for us to watch. It's a movie that somehow dull and incredibly tasteless. So like, so they go to visit him in the jail. They have a hunch that there's a guy, I think it's John Q's X like Uncle or cousin who can give him an alibi for the night the sheriff was killed.

He seems completely uninterested in that part of the movie. I think like Q's X even like says it. And it's just like why didn't Q'sac bring up the fact that you an album out Well, we're supposed to believe I think that he was real-rooted by the courts and the police that like it didn't matter What he said he was gonna get thrown in jail because he was a pat sea for this murder sure And he doesn't even seem to care if they find like No, but or not he's the worst man in the universe like it's he doesn't seem to care if he gets it a jail as long as that is a Nicole Kim and coming and like so but or not he's the worst man in the universe like it's he doesn't seem to care if he gets a jail

all the kids that is the cool Kim and coming in mimeing sex act to the air wearing a dress because pants are unbecoming they go later in visit and the cool Kim is wearing sparkly pants and junkie's like yells at her for wearing pants and tells her where dressed whenever he goes he names about thirty seven different people and he goes you know what they are? And they go, no, no, they're prisoners. They wear pants. Everyone wears pants in here. If you wear pants, how much was it till you apart from the men? But this is after he's literally like,

you know this guy, James Smith? No, okay, well, there's a, what about a, this guy, Delroy Becker? No, you don't know him? Okay, well, what about, and he just rambles off a bunch of made up names before making this point about pants But anyway, so they go to see his uncle or cousin who lives out in a shack in the middle of swamp and with his topless Haram

Without waiting through a ball. They way through they way through a bunch of fun for about 40 hours They take a long enough break to just sit on a log and maybe talk about where Zach Efron's relationship, like what's going on with his love life. Yeah. And they find this guy. Well, you have to realize it took them seven days to get there. It's a rest of pitch camp. They find this guy whose job appears to be disemballing Gator.

He has a Gator hanging. Well, that's the thing. Junk music says, of course, they found blood on my knife and I'm like, sure, it's my job. I'm a Gator Skinner. So they go to see his uncle who has a Gator hanging, well that's the thing, junk music says, of course they found blood on my knife and I'm like, shirts, that's my job, I'm a Gator Skinner. So they go to see his uncle who has a Gator hangout. Believable by the way, he looks like a Southern Gator Skinner. Oh yeah, and not at all like a kind of,

like formerly alcoholic Ace Ventura impersonator. Like a guy who hanging around Hollywood Boulevard pretending to be Ace Ventura. He could take pictures with him and then he goes to sleep in a dumpster. So... What's he doing with all his money? I thought all his... with his riches from posing as Ace Ventura on the street. Doesn't he use it to pay for Mekos?

Because he's got to have pay hard. He's got to have like a monkey. That's the kind of detective he is. I want my face to take taken with Ace Ventura. How do you even know that character that movie came out 10 years before he were born, sweetie? Anyway, they go and he, while he's talking to them, and even his uncle seems totally interested in providing an alibi. He slits open a gator's belly and pulls out about 40 tons worth of book and organs.

And this will be the first of several times that animal parts are used for no reason. So they find this alibi, they go back, there's a lot of filler, which includes a scene where Zach Efron and can a cool kidman go to the beach and she says, you want me to blow you? Well, I'm not gonna blow you.

I think we should get back to the beach scenes. It doesn't really connect up with the law. I'm just gonna mention what happens here, so we don't forget. And Zach Efron goes, just to show that this is totally unrelated to the rest of the movie Zach Efron goes swimming in his stung by a jellyfish He gets you low to jellyfish like there's a thousand jellyfish in the water all over his body and he gets out and a bunch of girls Or like uh-oh, we're gonna have to pee on the poison the cold kid starts going you don't piss on him get the fuck out of here I'll get the fuck out of here. If anyone's gonna piss on him, I'm gonna piss on

him. And very graphically, the Colt Kidman pees all over Zac Efron. And it's like, okay, is this supposed to be like funny or sexy or disturbing or. I feel like this needs to be addressed, but it is so out off the beaten path that I like I kind of want to get through this. Well, then there's a there's a there's a front page newspaper in his dads. His front page article is dads news paper the next day that says like boy saved. And I think it includes in the article that he got peed on. And the laughing stop because he's been peed on from coast to coast.

It turns out so it was the story that shocked a nation boy peed on Matthew McConaughey's partner leaves. He's a black guy and he doesn't like being treated badly by everyone in the South so he leaves and Nicole Kidman and Matthew McConaughey and Zac Efron I guess investigating something so they go to stay in a motel overnight They go to a bar where there's like a women singing trio in this dive bar, and Matthew McConaughey is making eyes with a guy across the room. He's a closet homosexual gentleman. They go back to the motel.

Zach Efron has a weird dream that involves seeing one of the guys from the bar naked, and then goes over to that guy's motel room to find. Yeah, these two men have basically raped and beaten and tortured Matthew McConaughey. They've changed Matthew McConaughey. We present him raped him. He's new. His face is all bloody. He's blood everywhere. He's lying on a shower.

There's a lot of Matthew McConaughey's butt in the back of him. His scrotum. Yeah. You wanted to get the front of his scrotum. No, you wanted. Not the front of his scrotum, so. No, no, no, no, no. So don't worry, it's not you can show this on network television in the family hour. But in case you wanted, you wanted Maddie Macana Hay to get the Eastern promises treatment. I'm imagining it.

We're dangerously close. I'm imagining standards and practices like with like a measuring tape. They have a caliper. It's like two millimeters of screw. That's fine. Oh wow. Let's see how close we get to the diameter of the screw to we get.

OK, that's good. We can show it. You know what? Put it on after. Put it on. It's a wavy macadamia, you know? Put it on right after the voice. It's a family-friendly scrotum. So they, Zach Efron breaks through a window,

beats up one of the guys. Keeps asking, what's with the plastic sheet? Which is the least important question, and it's obvious the plastic sheet is there to get the blood from getting on the carpet. Yeah. Like, why ask that question? If I was going to beat up and have sex with and then cut up Matthew McConaughey, I'm putting the class down everywhere. Yeah, because you don't want them to charge you for the damage you do to the room. No, I mean, I'm spending enough on Matthew McConaughey. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha I like about it is so it's two men who have done this to Matthew Mugani one is fully dressed and Zach Efron is fighting him the other one is just in his boxer shorts and as Nicole can watch is the guy

His boxer just gets up and leaves the room and walks out of the motel kind of there's like a jump cut where all of a sudden He's outside of the room and it's like it's almost as if he was like Look, I'm just gonna call a quiz. I don't need my clothes. City appears outside and This is a movie also we should mention one of the bad techniques This is this movie where a lot of things happen off camera So like macy gray spills some iced tea on her employer, but it happens off camera And then you cut back to her holding a picture and you're like, oh, I'm sorry. Well, it's just iced tea. It'll come out

It's like we you heard a splash sound like someone knocks over a glass and he'll be like, oh I'm sorry, well it just dice T, it'll come out. It's like, but you heard a splash sound. Like, someone knocks over a glass and you just hear it smash. That's a light motif, right? Yeah, light motif. It's a theme that runs out the film as things happening off screen. The producers are rinsed at that glass. They cannot predict it.

It's like the old thing about, you can tell it's a love budget movie, because the car chase ends with them pulling off the road and getting out of the cars. They get a word to smash the cars. So anyway, Matthew Ghandi's all beat up. I don't remember. I'm kind of blacked out for a little bit there. The movie picks up again with Matthew McConaughey out of the hospital, but depressed. He's drunk. He's lost. He's lost. He's lost. While he's out his partner, Yardley Publishes the story, right that then Exonerates junk. He's and the governor's a call. Yeah, and Yardley is had is an it has an English accent and Zac Efron goes to visit an amazing scene and Zac Efron goes to visit him and it's revealed

He was faking the English accent to get ahead and also he let me go and blow him at some point. And that's the extent of the scene. Literally because he had ice in his mouth. That character dropped a bomb on us. And it's never mentioned again. And so the article is out. John Qzek has left and he has picked up Nicole cold kidman and take it into part his his swamp shack hideaway

well they don't even show that i don't know you you know this like shanky shot of the by you but before that but before that he shows up at her house that she goes oh i was gonna write you a letter because he's obviously been out of jail for a couple days and he's like he got this great shirt i mean he's told him a while to go through thrift shots and amazing shirt and he decides to have sex with her right then and there and it's basically a rape scene and it's super starts that way. It's super rough and it but it just includes we

were turned on by this in case we were really turned on by John Q's ex pale but pumping into the cool kid man while he strangles her in case we're resting violently in case we were really turned on by john fusex pale but pumping into the car kidman while he strangles her in case we're instinct violently in case you jackhammer it case we didn't realize that this is supposed to be a noxious scene lead angles is intercut shots of animals and then a dead possum with blood on its stout

like he really goes all out so he amps up the sexiness yeah i want to say he's really delayed but in case that basically at this point at this point like So he amps up the sexiness. Yeah, I would have said he's really tittleates. Well, thank you, Zach, basically. At this point, at this point, I wanted to stop the movie and just scowl off all of my skin,

because I was never going to feel clean again otherwise. But anyway, John Q's act takes you to his Bayou bungalow. Yeah, Cape Man style. He gets over the head with the... Shrugs are by the hair of the swamp, which is... Then he puts what chili on it? Is that what Cape Man style is in an hamburger? That's animal animal style caveman style is when you put up rocks on the bread it's also called the tooth breaker but yeah but then so very popular among rock

biteers yes Zach Efron have a reading story Zachron. They ride their scooters all over. It gets a letter from a cold kidman. Zach Efron. Nicole Kimmon gives a letter to the biobrides to mail. Then Zach Efron is at his mother, the wedding of his father and his father's girlfriend. He goes to the kitchen where Macy Gray is now working because she's been fired by his father. And she hands in the letter. As if Nicole Kimmon mailed it it to her it doesn't make any sense why they should why she should give it to him but anyway

yeah no that was what i was gonna say it it comes by the securitious route so he and his brother maddie mcconny with a patch who now i've had to get in a boat getting a motorboat and ride around for about eighty years but i have expected them to show up with the Bayou shack after how long the sequence was and find a spaceship there. And it turned out that generations had passed since they left on their epic Vetch voyage through the Bayou.

Yeah, there's a technically it's a I don't think it's a Bayou. I think it's a swamp because it's the Everglades, I think. Hi. I feel like a Bayou should have filmed was the the C. They should have filmed Matthew McConaughey explaining to Lee Daniels why he insists that while riding in this motorboat, he holds Zach Efron close to his breast. This is a big motorboat. Yeah, and Matthew got his literally holding Zach Efron tight as you would a lover, as

they motorboat through the swamp and the end. Maybe to build speed, I don't know. What's your name? Kev Warp. And Zach Efron does mention the Matthew McConney looks like a pirate now, which he does with his eye patch. So they go to the swamp shack, which would be a great name for like a down home cook in place.

They go to the swamp shack where it's revealed to us through just seeing her dead body sitting in a chair That junkie was like it's killed Nicole Kippman. Yeah, and just left her to sit in a chair And they say bring her out and junkie says like she left That's what every character sounds like in this movie except for Macy Grady sounds like this except for macy great sounds like this i'm not gonna stop now i'm not gonna stop now but there's a scene where mathem akana is in the castle of spell on me

zack f runs trying to snap mathem akana he out of his depression and he makes him get a shower and mathem akana is literally in the shower just talking like this news came round and so like everyone in this movie is boomhauer basically yeah well i mean like that that's the that's the funny thing about this but like it's the movie feels like uh... someone totally jane was like this no one can understand what's going on

we need to get a narrator into explaining great i'll get masive great i get mumbles talks funny there's a there i feel like i know i have a northeastern accent yeah right i'm sure movies set in New York or New Jersey sound funny to people from the south, but at least they must sound comprehensible.

Like if you watch, analyze this, person from the south isn't like, I just couldn't understand what they were saying. It was just crazy. The studio execs are like, hey, what everybody loves about those early trailers of the Dark Knight, Dark Knight rises. Nobody understands this being character.

What's his story? It adds to the mystery. Let's just do an entire movie like that. It's, but it feels at times like Lee Daniels bought a 10 pound bag and then put like 80 pounds of southern in it. And it's just spilling over the sides that broke the bottom of the bag. And it's just a puddle of southern on the ground. So anyway, they find that John Q. Zack has killed the Colt Kidman,

his lady love and Zach Efron's lady love Oh, and they slept together at one point in order to cheer Zach Efron up after seeing his brother raped and tortured Nicole Kidman has sex with him and Little at and macy Gray says it feels awkward talking to you while you're watching this So I think you've seen enough and it cuts away from the sex scene the only time this movie cuts away from anything The only time it is ever as supposed to be tender i guess so the only time the movie has a sense of tastefulness is during the

consensual sex scene the one in the movie so anyway uh... and uh... there's a brief machete versus acts fight between john q's at holding the machete and i think i don't know if you can't get excited john q's at has a real advantage because he has depth perception and Matthew McConney has missing a lie. He's missing an eye, but is in much better shape than an old John Q. Yes, but still John Q. Zach manages to defeat him. Covered in Gator dreams, maybe.

Yeah, and Slitz Matthew McConney's throat with the machete killing him. Yeah. Zach Efron. He's the key score of the main characters we've got. Zach Efron of the main characters. We've got Zach Efron alive and John Q. Zach alive. And then I guess Jardleys off some place, but who cares about him? And Zach Efron runs into the swamp again. There's a long sequence of him just running through the swamp. John Q. Zach looking for him for an entire night and then Zach Efron escapes. And then you're right. He's swimming and that's how he escapes

and because Lee Daniels puts in a bunch of flashbacks to the beginning of the film where we saw that that guy from the summer and those had a swim because we need it that explain so that the audience to go all the swimming of course having watched many movies where a young person has to run away from a crazy sweaty person in the swamp, I guess. This movie seems to have no real interest in making that actually like tense.

No, there's no tension or suspense in the whole movie. And then at the end of the movie, there's a narration that says that John Q's ex character was found guilty and given the electric chair, and they never found out who killed the sheriff. Zach Efron's character became a writer of of summer now and he never got over his first love

so this the plot is moving probably literally it's a movie literally sounds like a fever dream like if you were feverish and you're like you had a dream and you're like uh... that be making great that make a great screenplay and you wake up and you start thinking about it like you're given the movie too much credit. Yeah, that doesn't. So we this is an adult swim show at time. We spent a long time summarizing this movie

and there's so much plot and we so much plot and it's a little happens on screen. So you're saying a story. But we spent all this time and yet I don't think we communicated exactly how ridiculously dull this movie is. Yeah, it's very, it is both. How boring. It manages, and it's kind of amazing. It manages to be so tautry and disgusting and sleazy and super boring and super, nothing happening on screen characters just kind of sit in there mumbling at each other and scenes that don't go anywhere that there's no purpose for them.

And then a narrator coming in and telling you that's something much more interesting that happens somewhere, somewhere else. I, I, I, I wasn't. So and so found all the clues. Like, I wouldn't have been surprised if there's just a scene of Zac Efron sitting in his underwear on his bed, reading a magazine to himself, and then the narrator was like, meanwhile, the barbarians invaded from the north. They were fought back back but many died

well the atom bomb was dropped in new york and man was forced to rediscover science and then zack effron in the next scene and the cult of him are just sitting in the front seats of a car like listening to the radio yeah this this movie is like five shocking scenes each of which are maybe five minutes long buffered by long scenes of mumbling in our tournaments of mumbling and walking around sometimes driving around I mean I to get back I'm starting to think that Lee Daniels offered by long scenes of mumbling in our tournaments of mumbling and walk it around sometimes driving around i mean i i think it back i'm starting to think that lead angles might not be a great director

uh... well i mean here's well don't come to such harsh i mean i mean look as long as shadow boxers in his credits i can look at the performance he got out of macy gray i mean that is what I'm looking at. I mean, she really seemed like she was, you know, some sort of dragged up crazy person. That's what he was going for. I mean, he made John Qsack way crazier than he was in the Raven, as I've mentioned already. That's true. That's true.

He did give everyone the chance to indulge their intercage. And the cold kidman, I think, does the best at this, just doing a very not-her-usual type of character performance. And she got a lot of praise for her performance, but it's still like, it's so unbelievable. Like it feels like she's playing a cartoon character. Yeah, well this movie got, I was, you know, I think both of us were looking at Wikipedia while watching, just to try and figure out what the fuck was going on because they're, I can't overstate what we've said before about how it's impossible it is to understand

half of what's being said. It's one of the rare movies that say in English but it needs subtitles. But we were looking at it and this movie got nominated for tremendous number of awards actually. Mostly acting awards but it was also nominated for the Palm Door at the Can Film Festival. Oh it probably won right because it was amazing. It did not win. I think it's one of these things. I think a more one. Where just because. Oh that's bullshit. Lee Daniel think i'm more one where just because that's bullshit the annuals and i keep his his his that he's not half the director

the daniel's is that's the thing i think that because precious was a uh... uh... critically acclaimed film people all the same like precious based on the novel push by sapphire but i think that i think that's really good on assumed like all we have to pay attention to this guy and treat him with respect well now he's that now he's a talent and a may and a and a mover yeah and even though this is

maybe the most incompetent movie we watch it was only because of precious i assume that he got the level of actors for this that he did a level of stars for a story and a movie that are Ritigulously like boring grotesque in the IMDB trivia. So take it with a grain of salt It says that Pedro Amodovar Considered making this his English language debut and you can a mat you can see in your head kind of like So they're great. I'm a dover. It would have been at least at the very least There's it would have been good interesting scenes in it probably but it seems much more this the kind of material that in the hands of someone like that might have turned out good maybe but still it would have been if he you know been the hand but like it lead angles

seem to be the right guy like I mean obviously this movie was trying to be provocative it's not like we don't understand that this movie is supposed to be this overheated Southern Gothic trash. I mean, at least if it's... Of the trash, but it doesn't work even on that level. At least if it was an almost over movie, there would have theoretically been subtitles so I could have followed it.

I'd like to postulate a theory going back to the urine scene. Okay. The scene that I was in? I feel like you said you're in the scene Make sure that Stewart got it it was a bit that I wasn't in the movie the Yeah, you literally said let's not talk about it because it is so it's got a joke fucking chill out let's listen to no it's not a joke it is so disconnected from the plot of the movie you're saying it could have been a short film

i have wonder i would like to possibly to thought that it's the it's the annuals just has a thing for the idea of zack eferon being p it on and so he made this whole movie as a beard so he could put that scene in a minute. It's possible. I mean, there's also a lot of scenes of Zac Efron just in underpants. Yeah.

Walking around with no clothes. I would agree with you if this movie wasn't so over directed. Yeah, that's true. If it looked like he didn't care about the other scenes, but he piles so much effort into the other, into just the techniques he throws. Unless he's just like fiddling around on his computer fucking editing program. Just like, oh, let's do this weird dissolve. Oh, let's do it four more times.

Hilarious. Oh, let's split screens. Let's do five split screens. The same person just spinning around. Because I had such a good do this. People don't want to watch five scenes in a row of people just staring at each other. Let's take this one split. It is amazing that there were no star wipes,

Venetian blinds wipes. I think those are called slat wipes. That there wasn't a point where the film just polarized for no reason. The screen saver comes on and like lasers appear. Like the screen burns away to get to the next scene. It's got that like really digitized look like an 80s music video all the sudden. Yeah, it just turns into an aha video.

There's just animation. I mean, he didn't, I'm kind of surprised at this one that he didn't use an iris in or iris out at any point in the movie. He seemed to be like it felt like he wanted to play around with 60s and 70s movie techniques and tropes. But in the way that like you're saying, like someone who just got netting program and can do everything with the touch of one button. So it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, put them all in. It's like home or with the making the video about Ned and star wife and star wife.

And she and Lisa says, they don't have to be starwifes. And he goes, why did hamburger when you can have steak? That's what it feels like Lee Daniels is saying all the time But the the peeing scene is really overwrought. It has nothing to do with the rest of the movie It's crazy unless they're trying he's trying to maybe he's trying to say that Nicole Kidman is saving him in some way By peeing him where that is degrading him, but it's he's getting something from it I like I don't know what the meaning of that scene is i don't know the meaning of this whole movie is the mean of the movies don't go to the south and that that's ever so on it's so unfocused like there's so many like he'll jump in the

literally it's out of focus yeah like most of the shots are out of focus as soon as he starts getting i guess like that i don't know what you don't know what you would be allowed to do. He was getting zapped again. So he's getting zapped by these fucking Charlie fishes. He's really getting zanged. And all of a sudden. Then it keeps cutting to like fuzzy out of focus shots of him and then like, people aren't like teenagers on the beach.

And the teenagers on the beach, like the colors are all blown out. Like it feels like what Oliver Stone does. Three teenagers on the beach and the teenagers in the beach like the colors are all blown out it like it feels like what Oliver Stone does three teenagers on the beach, three lady teenagers who by the way you know would love to pee on they are finding over there right about to pee on him who wouldn't want to pee on him he's a hunk come on yeah and then they call Kidman they were like oh is that is that Zach Efron from Orson and me oh I definitely want to pee on him. That's his number one credit, right? I think time you're beat. 10 guys we love to pee on. I think we got a win a win a date to pee on Zach Efron. Matt about mad.

Also, there's a cover story on Mads, Michelson. Who wouldn't want to be on that? What's Mads? You can have a supporting piece. The teenage girls love Mads Michelson. Who wouldn't? Come on. Ever since the show Mads about you with Helen Hunt? We really need Helen Hunt. So this movie is, it is an over directed but undermovieed movie.

And it's, yeah, it's like the kind of thing that there's a lot of the feeling of what like all of her stone or like rob zombie does I feel like where they throw in a lot of effects or techniques or Danny Boyle but with none of the skill that even those guys bring to and all that stuff I mean I'm not a big huge fan of most of them. I think, I think all that stuff. I think all that stuff. I'm okay, Stan. It all distracts from just the fact that most of the characters in the movie don't even seem to care about the focus of the first half of the movie, which is like clearing this guy, getting this weird criminal out. It focuses more on, I guess, Zach Efron being an underpants. He is not a smooth criminal, it looks like Randy fucking quit.

He's the least, he's the bumpiest criminal. They, they, it's, I guess the focus originally is supposed to be on Zac Efron's crush on Nicole Kidman, but it's so tautry and gross from the beginning. Like it feels like it should be Zac Efron seeing this woman and how getting, falling in love with her and then finding out how fucked up she is and he am getting dragged into this morass but everybody's already screwed up and crazy from the beginning you know okay keep you keep blocking me from moving the podcast long and uh but let's talk about this piece again we gotta get to what was with all the scars on man the mccamae's face our final judge why would you mess up

that puna that's a good bad move a good bad movie. That's Shane a pun him. A bad bad movie or movie you kind of liked. Elliot, what do you think? I would call this a bad bad movie. I wish like I went into this hoping that it was going to turn out to be a good bad movie. I had heard how crazy and ridiculous it was and yeah, I knew there was a scene where Nicole Kidman peed on Zac Efron. We're going into it, but it's so both boring and like gross. Does that scene with with John Q's act having sex with Nicole Kidman is so

Iki and everything else is so boring that I'm just say go on YouTube, go on the YouTube and watch go get me being on Zach Efron. That's all you're going to want to say. Yeah, I got you know, I'm going to go on P tube. I'll go with you here. This movie is so crazy that I wish I could recommend it because you're never going to see a movie like this. I don't know, like Southland tales is crazy like this, but not Toddry like this.

You're not going to want to watch it. You're not going to enjoy it. It's it's an experience like none other, but it's not worth your time. In the same way that like I some getting like all the hair on your body and head and the inside of your body waxed would be an experience. Yeah. But not something. Not like it's like trying to drink a gallon of milk in an hour. You can't do it, man. It's like the, it's like the cinnamon truss. It's like the cinnamon experiment. Whatever it is. No, I'm with you guys. Like it's a, it's a simple, simple stupid movie and it can't even be fun because

there's so much bullshit and so many different effects being used. So over directed. I'm just disappointed also that Lee Daniels dad Anthony Daniels wasn't in it reprising his role as C3PO. All right. Enough of that. So moving on to the next segment, the flop house movie mail. The next segment of this podcast, Centaveed. Uh, let's wash out the taste of the paper boy with letters. Let's get some letters to the editor's, editor letters, letters to the editors of flop house.

Please never make me watch the paper boy. It's called the paper boy because that's what John Q said, shouts out before chasing after him wild air. You know, you're a paper boy. It's called the paper boy because that's what John Q said shouts out before chasing after him wild air. You know, you're a paper boy. He's like, Paper Boy, you play a game, Paper Boy. You play a good paper game, Paper Boy. Now you don't. Now you paper July. So how much better would a bit of Angus Scrim and played every part in the movie? So Angus Scrim getting bitten by a jellyfish and then Angus Scrim peeing on him. This email is titled Jason Voorhe's question. Oh, okay. That's what he's saying.

He knows that Jason Voorhe's isn't a host. He's not going to answer these questions, right? This is from Mr. Allen, my name is Allen. Woody Allen. He says, hello, sirs. I recently discovered the Flop House podcast and has since become one of my favorite bad movie podcasts, which thanks Alan for whatever reason is about 85% of all podcasts apparently, but thanks Alan. But I recommend it's probably too. Most people I know but since no one listens to podcasts, this does nothing. Well, thanks. I guess Alan. After listening to the roommate episode, I learned that Stu is a Friday the 13th fan. I've wanted to meet a Friday the 13th expert for some time because I have vexed in question.

You were promoted from fan to expert in the two senses. I was very defined of villains. I haven't bothered to sit through an entire movie. I tried last week during the AMC marathon, but I've got a hunch. So he thinks Jason actually dies at the end of the movie. I have a hunch that even if I did watch the entire series. He thinks he's a mad goalie or something. I still wouldn't find answers.

So Mr. Wellington and there are five questions to prepare. Or beef if I may call you that. Number one, if Jason died as a young boy, why is he a grown man in the series? It's called suspension of disbelief. That way, let's do it. What do you say? Well, yeah, he doesn't really, he's he a grown man in the series? It's called suspension of disbelief. That way, let's do it. What do you say? Well, yeah, he doesn't really, he's like a weird zombie kid.

He didn't really die because he shows up and he drags that chick under the water and then he shows up later as a grown man with a bag on his head. But then as a zombie, do you feel like apparently a zombie who ages? Well, I'm gonna step in here and say magic. Yeah, oh, he's, I mean, he basically becomes a death elemental later in the series

spoiler alert. Also, there's some question as to whether the Jason at the end of the first one is real or a fantasy or dream. Yeah, I'm I'll agree with Elliot on that. Yeah, that is the end of carry. Yeah, like at the end of carry. Carry doesn't really. Or the end of I know who killed me. No, that's not a dream dream it's a story to wrote in the alternate and uh... well number two or like the end of shinler's list when turns out the holocaust was a dream okay shinler's list is my go to for these jokes too often

i got stopped that dreams and i are number two why is this face just figured besides constantly dying and running for several years before being brought back to life i mean i think that's covered like he would he was a, I mean, I don't want to use the word like, I don't know, he did like a retard or something like. Wow.

Come on. He used it all right. This is a setup. But like, he was framed in trap men. No, but he, he was a board. That's the word. He was born with a deformity and that was part of why, like, all the kids made fun of him and, yeah.

That's why nobody gave a shit when he's when he died himself he had to swim by himself he didn't have friends yeah okay number three does he have that's why he kills teenagers does he have superpowers or he just naturally otherworldly strong and regenerative if so how do you get them okay first off in the second movie when he runs around with a bag in his head he learns the skill on how to teleport from the boyfriend of the heroin of course after that point now They can teleport wherever he wants. He's fucking amazing, right?

Because he can just show up whatever he wants a murderous people. He watches this guy out of do it He just he absorbs it. It's like counting coup because he kills him later on counting coup Yeah, it's that thing that like Native American belief where if you kill somebody you take their spirit I didn't know that number four. Why is electricity running through his corpse keep bringing back to life or is it that you haven't seen her in this goes to jail right that answers that yeah

nothing explains that that's the relationship between the human body electricity better than her discos to jail turns into a magnet and you can fly and and blow things up why does Jason want to murder everyone is it revenge just a general hatred of other people and if he did manage to kill everyone at crystal lake would he be satisfied or would he just expand his kill zone consider and he took Manhattan we quit the slasher game and move on with his life uh... i think these are questions that every jay fan has to answer for themselves uh... they i mean part of it is that they leave a lot of that open-ended, and I think intentionally. In a way, Jason stands in for whatever you're most afraid of.

He's like a mirror. Especially if you're most afraid of a retarded zombie in a hockey mask. For your own dark desires. For your dark passenger. That should be the quote on every Friday in the 13th box. A mirror for your own dark desires. Stuart should be the quote on every Friday in the 13th box. A mirror for your own dark desires. Stuart Wellington, the flop has. Who'd cry?

That happened. All right. Well, this next email comes to us courtesy of Daniel last name withheld. It's titled In Search of Mysterious Astero Alignments. Dear floppers, long have I enjoyed the inspired hilarity you three original peaches along with the occasional derivative pair in the peaches absence

bring to bear on my eardrums on a mostly regular fortnightly basis but i'm sure do i feel compelled to write in for mysterious event has occurred they can only be described as spookily good bad uh... the grand conjuncture i work in the circulation department of a public library, and in this conversation. And I never thought this would happen to me. There was an image of me.

But a woman had sex with me. And there's an invisible maniac and a castle freak there. In this capacity, spend much of my day in the depths of the back room sorting, return material for its eventual replacement to the shelves. Being out of sight of the public and engaged in the sort of work that doesn't demand one's totality of attention, I can usually found ear buds in ringing my face into a grimace of stifled laughter

as I revisit some old favorite flop houses between new episodes. This very morning, as I sorted a few cart loads of DVDs, my deep cut episode was D-Wars, Dragon Wars. That's the old one. Yeah. And Dan was wrapping up his half-hearted recommendation of a movie. He was only two-thirds of the way through. Sounds like Dan.

Do you see it on a plane? I just picked up our copy of Cat Ballu and was reflecting on how undignified Leave Marvin looked on the cover when what should I hear, but Ellie, it's piping voice recommending Cat Ballu. It's's piping voice recommending Cat Ballu. It's a good movie, Cat Ballu. Yeah, why are you saying you're weird? I, that's how I remember an Elliott saying it. Oh, Cat Ballu.

The room real to about me is I struggled to maintain a grasp on what I had previously, and I even assumed to be comprehensible reality. What's in the airwaves like kid video or something? What kind of rationale? What kind of rational reality? Captain N. What kind of rational reality could I possibly believe in

after this Thunderbolt of cosmic alignment? How could I live as I once had the knowledge? I don't know, how could I live as I once had in the knowledge that my mean existence had somehow attracted the attention of some unnavable other God for what else commands such cosmos-warping power to enact such a coincidence. Oh yeah only because they look at do that. I get only shudder and terror as a thought of how irrevocably shredded my sanity would have been had the alignment occurred with head of the family.

In any case this moment please bet. Don't even want to think about it. Oh, at least imagine my conviction that the flop house is truly something special. Cheers to you, Dan Elliott Stewart, House cat, and if it's House cat's weekend to have custody, House cat's daughter. Wow! House cat, you're back. How was Spain? He's gotta give the fans up, especially he's gone on. Oh, he already left to go back.

That was... He cares so little about our podcasts. It's not even like he shows up at all. He shows up only when somebody says something reminding Stewart about it. So Stuart waves the ass get over I'm always so kind of sending. I can see him there now sitting on the couch going Eh, he just comes from the fancy feast catering. So did he watch catbelly or no? Because it's you'll you'd understand why Lee Marvin looks on dignified. He plays two characters in the movie

I think he was too terrified to after that. is a good movie this last email to man right here in Wolf City right here in Wolf City that's from the song anyway you're saying it's last email the evening is titled sure the invisible maniac music video okay so is this all Stewart with a little bit Elliott mailbag? This is from Ryan last name. He didn't he didn't live in one of those letters you usually write about how great you are. Hold on. You can still say this email. I think you're starting to get the sense. You're going to you're going to shake it up for a little bit. He says, is anyone with a passing familiarity of your program will know Stuart Wellington is an enthusiastic fan of the Adam Riftkin

Directed classic the invisible maniac. He sure is. I hope this is from Adam Riftkin. What listeners may not know is that the invisible maniac was deemed an important enough motion picture to earn a music video. Yes, this brings us to he's invisible. A music video performed by the metal band, keep left. We're counting the incredible achievement. Oh, the musical metal driving band keep left. Words cannot describe the ethereal beauty of this music video and the refrain informing us that he's invisible over and over again. It will haunt you for the rest of your life. The music video can be seen here. I'll throw a link up on the website. Please do. Hopefully the music video will be included in the inevitable criterion collection, Blu-ray, of the Invisible Maniac, perhaps with liner notes to help explain the many visual metaphors that make it such a powerful cinematic statement. Best wishes Ryan last name withheld. PS.

Useless Fun Fact, the lead singer of He's Invisible is a man named Dan Povenmire, who would later go on to write for Rocco's Modern Life, Direct for Family Guy, and create the wildy popular Kids Animated Series Phineas and Fur. Wow, it's pretty impressive. Between the success of director Adam Rifkin and singer Dan Povenmire, it has become clear. The Invisible Maniac is a launching pad for talent. Who will be the next breakout in visible maniacs star? No repeaters?

Stephanie Blake? Robert R. Ross Jr.? Only time will come. Yeah, it's a regular days to confuse Freaks and Geeks. It's one of those launching pads for careers. Yeah. I didn't actually hear the rest of the email because I was on the iTunes store trying to find

the keyplift song so I could immediately download it Sally Big my You may have to rip it You've seen some sort of rip it a new one. Yeah, yeah, that sounds way cooler than I know how to do on the internet You're gonna have to make like a little kid with her pantyhose and rip it. That's almost as cool as The song Dream Warriors by Dockin based on I thought it was John Borgon,

a song from Big Troll, a little China. I thought it was interesting that he seemed to believe that the marker of an important film is that we get a music video knowing that as you said, the aforementioned Dream Warriors were Freddie's dreaming of Doing, playing this awesome song. And then he wakes up and he's like, who were those guys?

You know, you could be my- You could be mine from Terminator 2. We're at the end, Terminator recognizes all the members of the band. Well, that was a major motion picture. Only because Guns and Roses did a song for it. Oh, great song, great movies. I think we can all agree.

With your bitch slap wrapping and your cocaine time, you get nothing done. Oh man, reading lyrics now. So it's like poetry. It's like poetry set to a beat. So finally, we have reached the point in our podcast where we recommend films, films that you might enjoy. Unlike the paperboy, which was A- was a slow you will not enjoy not watch it Let's do it. Do you have a recommendation for us? Uh, I think I have I think I have three recommendations what No, let me let me let me like karnak let me see if I can guess what these are No, I just want to say real quick if you're looking for like a southern fried like sleazy movie I'd recommend anything by Craig Brewer like hustle and flow or black stank moon, which

I think we've all recommended at least once. But the movie I actually want to recommend it. I do want to recommend with a grain of salt because it's called head of the foot down because it's called salt. I just watched VHS recently, a found footage horror movie anthology that is, I would like a man checking out if you are a horror movie fan. That's about half good, I was just... Yeah, and I think that's part of why if you're a horror movie fan and you are interested at all in that type of horror movie, I guess genre, but it doesn't, I don't know if it fits. At this point, it's become a genre.

That I'm not particularly a fan because a lot of it's like, hey, somebody's talking into the camera. Oh no, something scary's going on in the background. But I think there's some good entries. The Thai West bit is interesting and kind of breaks the flow. And then the final entry by a group of guys who I don't actually remember their name. They managed to do some really interesting special effects stuff with what I'm assuming

is a relatively small budget. So if you're interested in horror movies, but I mean, I'm not like streaming right now. Yeah, if you hate film footage movies, do not watch it. It will make you only more mad. Yeah Wait, that was just too, right? And I was I was recommending hustle and flow and Fucking invisible mania

It's real castle freak on the fire. Why not? Yeah, I didn't know it gets totally ripped off this dude's dick hole. I like it. I like to record. I'm not just dick hole, I'm out. Oh, now it's left. First the cat, the house cat, then Stuart. He just dropped the mic after the word dick hole and left. I like to recommend a movie. I don't know whether it actually ever got a theatrical release, but it's available on Netflix streaming. It's called Indie Game, the movie. It's a documentary about three developers or three companies. I mean there's actually like four developers who are working on for someone like me who likes video games, but kind of checked out posts say 9-11,

the Super Nintendo, like Mario Brothers. Yeah, I know I'm back guys, by the way. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I game. You really stop playing video games around the time they stop making those hoops you hit with a stick. The leisure suit Larry's got to push down after those after they after they made the leisure suit Larry's too realistic. Well, they're doing it's like whatever happened in the fantasy. Point is these people are doing games that have very simple mechanics, which I actually think for me makes a more enjoyable game. I feel like even, you know, like... You don't like gameplay that's too complicated. Yeah, I don't, I mean, like, even beyond like video games,

like board games, I feel like the classic board games that have endured have very simple mechanics, but a lot of strategy involved. Yeah, like mouse trap. A lot of strategy involved. And these are games that have, harkened back to like the simple mechanics of earlier video games, but have sort of pretensions towards doing something a little more artful.

And it's an interesting documentary about people trying to make video games outside of like big video game companies. Your calls of duty. Yeah. Not a fan. I guess it's your turn. So what was it called indie game, the movie? Yeah. I'd like to recommend, I think two movies movies one is a movie you probably haven't seen and one is a movie You probably have seen but I'm gonna ask you to look at it again with new eyes the movie you haven't seen someone's eyes out Put them in your face. We'd just be like the scene in Blade Runner and Roy Batty goes to the eye bank Anyway

He's seen many things see sea beams glittering off, et cetera, et cetera. What the first movie, electronic, is called The Life of O'Haru, or the original Japanese title is Psychaku Ichidiona, Psychaku's Amorous Woman. This is a Kenji Mitsuguichi film. You may, I'm sure you know him from such movies as Getsu. Anybody?

Sanjo and Sanjo Dio, Sanjo the Baylor. Anyway, he's one of the greats of Japanese film. you know him from such movies as Getzoo. Anybody? Yeah, yeah. And Sancio Dio, Sancio the Baylor. Anyway, he's one of the greats of Japanese film. And the life of a hero is, if you can imagine kind of like a proto-feminist samurai movie in a way, not, it's set in that time period. It's not really a samurai movie in that there's no sword fighting or anything.

But about a woman who basically there's no ninjas. Because she is born into a world where women have no power is forced through no fault of her own into a series of situations where kind of true love and happiness escapes her and she enters into lower and lower levels of degradation until attempting to reach some kind of transcendence at the end. And it turns out to be a really beautiful movie in the end. And it's a very well-made film. Mitsuguichi is big.

One of his big trademarks was long takes with very elegant camera movements. And it's just a really well put together movie. I really liked a lot. If you haven't seen his movie, so you see that too which one might one of the best Japanese ghost movies ever uh... but this one life of will ho ho ho is also fantastic and i highly recommend it

and the movie i would say to watch with fresh eyes and let watch the little movie at this at her that hadn't seen in a number of years little thing called stars wars uh... and this is a movie that all of us nerds have i assume a complicated relationship with. I know I did. That as a kid, I loved these movies and I ate up the whole world and the whole universe.

And it became no longer a series of movies, but this mythology that I needed to master and every new addition to it, I had to judge and each addition changed my evaluation of the entire, the entire work. And I got really tired of that and really exhausted by it. And all the like debate over if the prequels affect the new, the old ones and what's better and what happens is Lucas and et cetera.

And on a whim, basically on Saturday, I just watched my old VHS copy of Star Wars from when they re-released it in the mid 90s and watched it just as a movie and it was so much fun and it's such such like a fun, enjoyable, exciting science fiction fantasy adventure. I know you guys disagree and you say Star Wars is not fun, but it was nice to watch it from the point of view of, I am watching a movie that I like but I'm not watching it from

the point of view of I know all the lines, I know what happens to all the characters later, I know their back stories. I know what the fucking Dianoga is called, even though it's never named in the movie. Like, just watching it from the point of view. It's Dianoga, though. It's Dianoga. But watching it from the point of view of a fan of a movie,

just watching that movie as one movie story that just exists on its own was such a refreshing and entertaining experience for me. So I would say go back and watch Star Wars pretending that this is the only Star Wars movie and the only Star Wars thing that there is. So you're saying you're taking the stand that this movie that sparked an empire is good. What I'm saying is I'm taking the stand that you can still enjoy it even more than you did before by clearing away all the debtors that's accumulated around it.

The, the pond the Bobbos. Wait, no, he's in that. He's in that. No, I mean like the den guard, the prequels, the novels, the toys, the video games, the TV show, your personal feelings about George Lucas, any of that shit. Like it's no, it's no wonder that it's an enjoyable movie at the time it was the most successful movie in the history of movies but it's easy to lose sight of it because there's so it's easy to lose to miss the farce for the trees because there's so many fucking trees that are terrible so let's focus in on all creative activities on the so before we sign, I like to say on a personal note, the outpouring, the outpouring of sympathy from fans after my ACL injury has just been astounding in its

non-existence. It's just been amazing. It was so hard to walk into Danza's. It was so hard to walk through the apartment for all the giant flower horses that were in there. Yeah. Just pushing our way through all the good Dolan's cards that were in cents. I would like to thank Alison Abrams, who was literally the one person who contacted me on Twitter to say that she was sorry. You have won the ill-defined contest that did not exist. Well, Dan, I don't want to call you an ungrateful bastard. But I think you, I'm glad you took this time out

to admonish our fans for not cussed, not rending their garments inside this over your non-life threatening, but uncomfortably angry. You're just on their face. I'm just, for not groveling in the dirt and walking on their knees to the local shrine. I'm good. To pray, to pray you get through this.

I'm gonna be going under the knife, Elliot, under the knife in two weeks. You get to have a dead guy's zombie tendon in your knee. That's amazing. When I was jogging on a treadmill today, for, and I was all sweaty and man, I was looking good, right? I thought I was watching you from the window.

You were like, Matthew McHenry in this movie, just sweaty and cut. Sweaty, cut up, and I was thinking about you not that much, but some of the time. I'm probably going to be sweaty and cut. I was listening to what a kid's like nowadays. So I'm yogurt. You're a listing to be yogurt. Dislatching around in a tub. listen to what a kids like nowadays. Yogurt? Yogurt? You were listening to yogurt. Just sloshing around in a tub.

You squirted it in the air. Do I not know what you're checking? I guess there's something you care. So I want to thank, so I just want to say to all our listeners who have been with us for a number of years now, who go back and relistened episode, stand up for us in the AV club comments. Thanks for, you should be ashamed of yourself for not stopping your life To put yourself at the service of

Dan's knee all right, well On that note you you are you are the true monsters of history At long last have you no shame? I like this sign on. For a second I thought. Have you no decent seat? When he John Q's egg was a monster. No, no.

His murdering of two possibly three people for the flop hat. Hales for this. Hales for this refusal to acknowledge. I've got the tearing of tons of alligator guts out of an alligator corpse. I have to. Dan. No, but this snubbing of Dan's knee. The tearing of tons of alligator guts out of an alligator corpse is disgusting Dan no, no, but this snubbing of Dan's knee. I guess I'm steward Wellington. I'm I'm too disgusted to say that I'm Elliott Kaelin And I'd everyone oh man

You've horrified me damn Oh man, what's that fanfic pictures of boobs? More aprilineal boobitchers. Hey thumbs up to that guy, very talented. Finally, combine the two things we love most, ten inch unit turtle supporting characters and boobs. Now, if we could only see Crang with boobs. That's gotta exist somewhere. Careful what you wish for. Crang with boobs Careful what you wish for

Crang with boobs. What about bebop and rock steady with boobs? No, it's awesome. No, you're talking. Shredder with boobs not so much. No, no, no, no Now crang's robot body with boobs now you're talking. Yeah, no shit It would be like one of those weird soriyama sex robot drugs like the spectra robot Yeah, you spectra robot. The spectra robot, yeah, but with a brain in his belly. But with Craig. Well, Craig, yeah. Craig is a crane.

Yeah, Craig. He's the living brain from Dimension X. He's a Craig.