The Flop House - The Flop House: Episode #15 - D-Wars: Dragon Wars

Episode Date: May 4, 2008

We answer the question, "How bad could a movie with dragon wars possibly be?"  Meanwhile, Dan pitches a new Bikini-themed movie, Elliott has a flashback to the war, Stu makes a love connection, and we all take a big swig of the Hong Kong cocktail.0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 26:07 - After a brief and transparent bid for sympathy on Dan's part, we get down to business and discuss D-Wars: Dragon Wars, the film that can't make up its mind whether to abbreviate itself.26:08 - 27:37 - Final judgments.27:38 - 28:49 - We announce a shameless ploy to increase listenership.28:50 - 32:29 - A long-absent segment makes its triumphant return.32:30 - 38:20 - The sad bastards recommend.38:21 - 42:08 - Some podcast business is taken care of, amidst copious gibberish.42:09 - 43:21 - Goodbyes, theme music, and outtakes.I apologize that the audio quality is slightly lower than the previous few episodes.  My allergy-addled mind didn't take enough time checking the levels, so I sound slightly louder and cracklier than Stu or Elliott, despite doing my best to fix it in post.

This week on the flop house, we discussed the two most exciting words in the English language Dragon Wars Welcome to the flop house tonight. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington. And I'm Elliot Kaelin. I apologize in advance if I sneeze or sniff or just sound miserable tonight, I have allergies of some kind. Poor guy. Not funny, just true.

Maybe you're allergic to dragons. It could be allergic to dragons, but why would that strike me right now, Elliot? Well, it could be because we just watched D-war Dragon Wars, the hit Korean U.S. Coventure. And when I think of dragons, the first name that pops into my mind is Robert Forster. Yes, and the second name is Darrell from the office. Huh, well it's a good thing that both of those actors were in this movie. The third name is some Korean guy who also likes dragons.

He was really in the film. Yeah, well Dragon Wars, this seems is a pretty simple concept. I don't think there would be any trouble setting that in turning into a movie. This is where you would be wrong. The concept of Dragon Wars is surprisingly complex and intricate. How so? Well, it all begins with an ancient Korean legend. You see, there's an ancient Korean legend that what's it called

Nirogi I don't know I told you that you would have to explain this part of screenplay because I completely the backstory to Dragon Wars is exciting and dull it's told to us in a triple flashback structure we see a flashback which becomes another flashback which at one point becomes another flashback but anyway it turns out 500 years ago in the year 1507, because the movie was released in 2007, there was a girl born with a dragon birthmark on her shoulder. And for some reason, that dragon birthmark gives her the power to turn one of two dragons, Imugi or Baraka, into who actually serpents.

I'm falling asleep already. I have fallen asleep. She can turn one of these serpents into a dragon. And the power of that dragon is undefined. But apparently it's pretty powerful because it could quote, wipe out the entire village, which is not that big a deal. But anyway, in the year 1507, there's an old man.

He trains a young guy to be a warrior to protect this girl an army of i assume demons they seem to be just silons or suits of armor something like that what are they called uh... the i forgot a trot's army at rock uh... yes i'm like that it's an army of people and dinosaurs and dragons uh... try as well be orcs i mean because it's all it's all very uh... uh... and they generate it on the try to capture this woman they fail flash forward five hundred years two thousand seven handsome reporter

christmas cool guy and remembers name and is and is sassy black buddy have to save the the reincarnation of this girl now i'll make it clear though you can say flash forward you mean that figuratively because actually the structure of the film is there's the news pay the the newsman uh... the the television reporter christmas cool guy who discovered there's some sort of like dragon bones or something that's just a little and they never really explain why that scale is that it's a movie opens at a

crime scene where some unknown crime has been committed and there's a giant dragon scale christmick cool guy sees it and then this and he remembers as a kid being left alone by his father with Robert forster jack of jacks antiques uh... who tells him in flashback the story of how they are the reincarnations of these Korean heroes yeah who in in flashback the story of how they are the reincarnations of these Korean heroes. Yeah. Who in a flashback see the good serpent Imogi? Robert Forcer specifically is when he's in the past is basically the sage kung fu master

character from kill bill volume two. Yeah. I would say. I just like to point out that the kid is left by Robert for like with his dad is Robert Forcer The the kids dad is trying to sell Robert Forster antique shop owner Robert Forster some ancient dagger Whose antique shop is basically a warehouse of what I have to zoom our stolen works of art Yeah, there's like a sarcophagus in there. There's a golden Buddha statue. It's a pretty fancy antique shop And all that shit later on, like the bad guy,

he's kind of like a weird mixture of Terence Stamp and- And Bill Murray, Steve Martin and Darth Vader and Dr. Doom. Yeah, this was- Now there's another armored- Shredder? Shredder, I get it. He tends to get hit by cars a lot. There's a scene.

One beautiful scene. Where he gets hit by a uh... then there's a fight scene like he's not he's okay because he's a big guy and they got in the uh... fight with him for a while and then gets hit by another car and that knocks him down yeah this is a movie before we get any further know this know this he

audience this is a movie in which many cars flip over or swear around things sometimes for no reason the dragon chate at one point the evil serpent broke, Buraki, chases them through a garage of a hospital. They run out onto the street. He comes out and roars at something off screen and then we just see a van tip and over and across the screen passed him, which I guess swerved to miss him off camera.

Yeah. Great moving. I bet they did a couple of takes for that that the computer generated band to go across the street let but that's the back story so there's this reincarnated girl nineteen years old she's about to turn twenty which is the magic age when she gets her dragon power christmacool his sassy friend and fbi and christmacool i guess believes robber

for a certain place at the even though robber for a star has uh... faked a heart attack so he can be alone with this young boy and the first thing tells him is like oh um... by the way you're uh... chosen one and you're gonna fight drag and he gives them a magic ambulance yeah well which he kept for the many interview years yep those uh... never losing faith he's gonna have to fight a weirdly phallic dragon so what you're saying is this movie is basically just a creation of his mind. It's a coping mechanism while he's being molested by

Robert Forester. I think that is correct. I have to believe that's the alternate ending that was on the DVD. It's a subtext. The thing is that the entire movie is basically a number of weird scenes of exposition that are linked together by our main characters being chased by dragons around the town. And then occasionally you'll just have long sequences where it's the army fighting dragons. Yeah, because like the first fucking 45 minutes of the movie is scenes of the fucking main character sitting around talking like, man we gotta get away from these fucking dragons dragons and then a dragon shows up and they run away for a while and apparently they lose the fucking giant snake dragon somewhere who's rampage across L.A. gets very little attention the first couple days. Yeah couple of days at least

It's not on the news as far as we can tell But this is the fucking reporters too busy running away from the goddamn dragon. One reporter in L.A. So the story is not getting out. Yeah, but you figure that several buildings get destroyed by a giant dragon. Word will get around. This is sort of like the internet or something. Yeah.

You know, person to person. If you don't happen the other day, my house got knocked out by a dragon. Yeah, but the shit, that's weird. After like the 7th grade person would be like, hey, did you hear? Like everybody's turned into a dragon. And, but shit that's weird. I know person would be like like hey did you hear like everybody's turned into dragon and houses are exploding. That doesn't seem right. You know they kind of thing. Yeah, exactly. No trust me my friends friends hairdressers uncle's in. He saw it. So there's also this is also but this is a world let's remember this world where word about the dragon that's destroying buildings and killing people doesn't get out very quickly. Sure. It's also a world where word about the dragon that's destroying buildings and killing people doesn't get out very quickly

Sure is also world where a man is put in a straight jacket a zookeeper It kindly fat slaps zookeeper. We first see falling asleep while eating pizza witnesses the serpent the evil serpent eating some elephants He reports this to the police as he should and he's immediately put in a straight jacket and confined yeah like right away that you know he's not violent he's just talking about a big snake but straight jacket i mean less what we didn't see was a cutscene where you know it's his dream to be an escape artist and he was just happening was a lot of the police or something yeah sure but uh... he has a long history of like mental illness

possibly he was a molested as a child or something by Robert for sure i think that you may be our our second and last of the reference to molestation in this uh... in this podcast uh... i was going to try and fit like that maybe maybe a surprise third at some point look for an audience but that let's get to the cut to the chase sure like the movie didn't does this film skimp on the dragonwaring?

Hmm. I'd have to say no on that account. There is a lot of dragonwaring. Almost too much. Yeah, I would go so far, I just say too much. I mean, I made the point, you know, there's a long scene of the dragons tearing up. I guess that's Los Angeles that they're fighting.

You didn't recognize it? I don't know. You didn't recognize the two square blocks of L.a. that the entire movie took place in over and over again i'm just i i i just found it hard to believe that it actually was lost angeles knowing that it was a Korean film like i thought that maybe there would be doubling some korean city for lost angeles or they shot it in toronto or something like that so yeah alright the dragons are tearing up lost angeles and that's pretty exciting because you don't see that every day. Dragons taking down Los Angeles, but then the big, climactic fight that are all transported into some sort of eerie,

nether world that's sort of like, they're like a moral, hellish limbo, and two dragons fight each other, and that's not as exciting. No, it's not. Yeah, that's when you would expect to see Dragon. What you're saying is, is it Dragon? Exactly. What you're saying is when it comes to Dragon Wars, it's all about context. Yeah, I like a fish out of water Dragon War. You know, that's the thing.

When you see Dragon's fighting in a wasteland, frankly, it looked like it was just like somebody who was some guy that's a really cool looking video game. Yeah. Because it looked like a video game, like fighting game level, where you're like, oh, look at the crazy thing in the background. Oh, wow, he did that move, where he grabbed the other dragon with his mouth.

Yeah. Was that spoiler? Was that a snapshot? I'm not afraid of that. Yeah, I was just saying he was the mouth move. You shouldn't have said that there were actually dragon wars in the movie Dragon Wars. OK, I probably would have.

If you did, I went, I was scared. So going into this, I was worried it would turn out to be a movie where it was about, again, a troubled child who creates dragon wars And his imagination to escape from say a shattered homeland sort of a never-ending story never-ending story Godzilla's revenge kind of thing bridge to terbithia, you know But no it was about fucking dragons running around in helicopter shooting there were those dragons They just look like giant heredactals. Yeah, like a lot of the things that we were advertised as dragons

I mean I have to say those guys were dragons. That's the big one. Okay, the ones that were like those big like Nazgul, the big fat ones, the ones that were riding the bull coves. Yeah, the bull coves were the flying ones Those were dragons, but like a lot of the big fat slug things with the guns on their back. I would say those are not dragons Yeah, those are those are just rejected Moss Eisley background monsters from the retooled Star Wars. Yeah, they look like do-backs. You said that right. Yeah, well, I didn't want to admit that I called them do-backs. Yeah, that's cool.

I made a number of Star Wars references during that. What's really important, and I think any listener to this podcast assumes that you know the full name. For full disclosure, you should make sure that you the right the two Lega dinosaurs that were being written you repeatedly referred to as tauntons that's true but everyone knows what tauntons are right listeners so nice giggle so the weird thing is that uh... five hundred years later uh... when this entire army is created out of like dust or ink or some shitting. They were all coming out of scrolls. Yeah, they all came out of scrolls.

An inspiring tale of the written word. Exactly. So these dinosaurs, dragon things, I don't know, had a giant like misalongers on their back. And those misalongers blew up literally every single possible like tank that the United States Army could throw at him So their arm and bullets had no effect on and on any of the soldiers 500 years ago They had these same misal launchers like who's inventing this shit dragons Magicians there was a magician there was one magician with his weird like light like Sabers some sort of lightsaber sort that didn't work for other people and shield the blocked bullets yeah a lot of

those one are aiming at the shield yeah that was there's well I think what it is is because these dragons pop up every 500 years they have to make sure that their technology is far enough ahead to deal with I wonder what the dragon does during that time is it like Brigadune? Does it just sleep for 500 years? Or is there is he hang out in that wasteland? I think it's like a time jump for him. It's just been...

Oh, okay, it's just the next thing. Yeah, I think that's probably fair. But then how long has this been going on? Cause we saw the first time we see it happening is in 1507. I have to zoom in and have an in 1007. Yeah. 507, 507 oh

7 and then or just 7 I guess the original dragon fighter was actually a stegosaurus. Yeah That's I was able to go back far enough. It's just dinosaurs You know, and that's not not very exciting. That's why that wasn't the movie I like that does a sound like a movie that I would have written when I was 10 Only if they're talking only if there's only if there's caboys running on their backs firing laser guns. That'd be so awesome Yeah, and one of them has like a like a robot that learns how to love yep and another has Their minds are in the dinosaurs wear Hawaiian shirts and wear Sneakers now it's just just for the last dinosaur.

Or actually, that or a Rex, I guess. Now it's just the folder that I had when I was in third grade that showed a dime sort of sunglasses on surfing. Yeah, it's a cool stuff. It was so cool. You may wonder why we're not talking that much about the characters in this movie. And that's because there was nothing memorable about any of them other than that they were all played by

character actors that you would recognize from several uh... american movies or television shows and they're all uh... faces they're all you know people that you would know but uh... and clearly this is their uh... version of doing a japanese commercial say yeah the biggest start in the movie is Robert Forster Yeah, that says something for you. Well, he knows a thing or two about dealing with giant reptiles though, so that's true

Yeah, I mean I was I was a big fan of the casting like I like it when I watch a movie and the whole time like oh, hey Thank God. I didn't know he was frying the dragons like Is a new aspect to the game really not as i'm db bio really like it snares me i can't wait for that episode of the office when he's like by the way i hate dragons wink wings of the camera and dragon was a db now animated sparkle and uh...

speak of animated all right this is off traffic you guys you guys watch thirty rock uh... you know this have you noticed the animated ads for movies in theaters now that run across the bottom of the as irritating and i said this would be the best most of the the middle of a podcast about dragon horse

thanks andy rooting you more than the anti-routing all our robert forced or this film well that's the other thing that's the other thing every time like they need saving from something uh... some random stranger comes up and saves them and then after they leave the camera will linger on that random stranger for a little bit and will see him more for the robert forster him or her and you gotta wonder why it couldn't have just been robert for the showing

that i actually don't know the same is guys, what you don't understand is that that wasn't special effects. That was a Robert Forster acting really well. Oh, that's a lie. It was the same. It's still the same. It's a really big game and really character. Yeah, yeah.

So you were talking earlier about the exposition and how it kind of jumps around and how early on, you don't know if you're coming or going. I really respect that about a movie that really doesn't like underestimate its audience, like- It doesn't underestimate us one way to put it. Another way to put it is, as I think I said I was watching it, it felt like we started at chapter four.

Yeah, you know, it's like you jump right in the middle, like, it's very much like if like five, eleven-year-olds had to come up with a movie and we're still riding it midway through the stage. Yeah, that's right, that's true, and there's something kind we're still writing it. Midway through the day. That's right. That's true. There's something kind of endearing about that. As if they decided, you know, I don't want to write a movie about feudal Korea. I want to write a movie about dragons.

Yep. Well, this was very much, and I know this because I read about it a little bit, not to prepare for this podcast, but just when Dragon Wars was coming out. Because you said holy shit, there's a movie about dragons. I said, I have to learn more about this. about it a little bit. Not to prepare for this podcast, but just when Dragon Wars was coming out. You said holy shit, there's a movie about Dragon. I said I have to learn more about this. This was a movie that I guess the studio that made it was Korean with I guess American backers. And this was a bid by Korea, by the way, the Korean film industry to kind of get a bigger foothold in the American film goers mind,

which is why which is why it was shot in English, mostly in Los Angeles with American industry to kind of get a bigger foothold in the american film goers mind which is why which is why it was shot in english mostly within lost angelist with american actors and i guess old boy had was not blazing the path that they were hoping to make in uh... in the american mind so they took out dragon wars and uh... i don't think it was such a successful mission rest his history i do believe it is the highest grossing Korean film in Korea. Okay. But then it was not a successful export.

Well, that's because they love Robert Forster over there. You can make anything in Korea. The crazy about that guy. He becomes amazing. He's like George Clooney in Korea. Both of the Koreas. But it was interesting though, because it's... He invites them, bridges to get. the story about South Korea now is that

that you really read about is that there's this explosion of new film talent and like there are all these movies coming out of Korea, these kind of harder-edge things and then they're like no no no we can make Dragon Wars 2 don't worry we can make our version of Rain of Fire. My complaint about this movie my main complaint is that Although they're dead. Yeah I'm here this one although they're dead end up being a lot of dragon-waring I thought that the dragon-waring was very

Lopsided like the last 40 minutes was just dragons fighting and then the rest of it was Exposition and people running away and when i hear when i heard dragon wars when i hear the title dragon wars i think awesome all right like i saw the trailer i'm like okay this is this movie is entirely about uh... a bunch of dragons wake up in modern day lost angeles and the u.s. has to fight them off and it's kind of i mean like i guess it's like

that is ill but You expected strategy like day two we lost some ground to the dragons. We're gonna make it up on day three though Oh, they're up my flank pincher movement pincher movement. Did did did did it. So large Here's a picture of my girlfriend back home. Oh she's beautiful Don't die on me. You gotta stay alive. You go over and thank anything. Yeah And then Ernie pile watch like that is. So I was inspired by the story of GI dinosaur drug dragon fighter Yes, what are we fighting for man? Was America even involved in these dragons?

No, it was me. You know, so what and then I was the guys last name dragon Yeah, I think so and then like all right men when you're on leave remember if you're gonna fuck a dragon Where a dragon condom you don't understand humans the dragons can live together Should a dragon lover, you know things like that who slips and Bring our boys back from the dragon war. Yeah, my fellow Americans All right, I believe in the dragon fee if anybody hears Just be ragged. I'm one the words now Anybody hears the sound of a pencil on paper. It's because I'm finishing my screen player as we speak

We're just like a disaster Carton has descended across Europe. What volcano? You didn't expect so much mystical Korean nonsense. Yes. Is what it comes down to. And again, I expected more reaction from the populace because unless a dragon is being shot out right in front of their eyes, they don't notice it.

Well, people are pretty complacent. The people in this movie are much like horses. Or parents, if they don't see it, it doesn't exist. You kind of feel like if the dragon's going to blanket over all of LA, everyone would have fallen asleep because they would think it was night. For all the talk about what a terrible movie this is,

and it is terrible, I cannot lie to you. I was so excited to see dragons fighting helicopter gunships and things like that. I'm sure. And dragons flipping cars over. And we were talking earlier about how children have paradiseed the carnae film is on my, is on my Tivo at home when I'm looking forward

to watching it. I'm in the middle of Sedustin abandoned the other movie by one of the movies by the guy who made divorce Italian style. But. Classic, uh, semi-assed films. Exactly. I was watching Picking in the Rock. I think I can recommend it that a while ago

But I got to tell you watching Dragon's fighting helicopter gunships is the funniest thing in the world We've got some extra stuff to deal with the I promise you guys a surprise before the podcast started But I'm so I want to keep things moving along Surprise each of you has one data live. Yep. I Poison the Chinese that you ordered. Yep. Uh, the results of the blood test. You guys are actually brothers. You guys have Look what we made out last night. Oh my god. You guys have to keep your adrenaline pumping or else your heart will explode. Oh no, we got a Hunk on cocktail. Yeah. They gave you the

hank on cocktail the hank on cocktail you know I know it well the famous hank you saw the cover story about it in Cosmo right people who don't know what crank is are baffled at this point in the podcast I think people I think the people listen to this have it will probably have a passing familiarity of crank on cocktail the uh now not to not to sidetrack this conversation back to Dragon Wars. But if I, if I, if I, I have one small complaint about this movie is that this movie is literally filled with reaction shots of people like, like a dragon going by and somebody's eyes going wide, like cars flipping over, etc, etc.

And then like dinosaurs attacking people in feudal Korea and their pants falling down like that sort of thing. The guys pants didn't actually fall down. But they're, uh, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're wrapped him by his, his pant ass, the same thing. So, but there isn't a single, uh, like reaction, like nude scene, like a dragon knocking over a wall on the girls like taking a shower or like a dragon runs by really fast and a girl's blouse falls down and it makes like a zip sound effect like there's

nothing like that. So you would rather this be zapped towards what you're saying. Uh, yes, frankly, if that meant that it started to scot bao. I think you have your script bikini dragon wars. Yeah, that's the thing. The great Bekeeney Dragon Wars. They inherit adventure. What happens is they inherit a couple of dragons, and the dragons are about to go out of business. Yeah. There's only one way we're gonna be able

to keep these dragons afloat girls. The big evil developer wants to bring in his own non-sexy dragons. Let's get a tear down these dragons. Yeah. Keeney's. Those Bekeeney movies, it's never the government wants to build a highway using eminent domain? And the bikini girls are obviously on the wrong side of this debate. This town needs this highway to get business in, but movies always side with the bikini

girls. Just like in life. Those girls are roadblocks to progress, but that's struggling town. But they're so topless. Before we move on, I do wanna say one thing that I think was not addressed when we're talking about the fat zookeeper, which is while he's being, there's so many nuances to that portrayal

about there's his being asleep, there's his most happy pizza. Wellal about there's his being asleep. There's his most happy and pizza Well, when he's talking to the psych psychiatrist, there's this one point where she's like Just say that there's no Giants nakes and we'll let you go or something like that. Yeah, and he's like, okay I realize that there's no Giants nakes. I don't want to get thrown in the thing. I'm gonna I'm just gonna fake it and she's like fine You can go and then they do the thing where the dragon comes up in the window behind and her

Yeah, and it's and he's like look look it's right there behind you and she turns around and it's not there And it's such a like an abitant Costello meat Frankenstein moment. Yeah, and I just you know that joke never gets old It's never does it's what it's that's what I'm saying timeless that's exactly you didn't miscontrude his his missus to his message at all no well that's a little more of the spirit that I was looking for a dragon oh you want it more the wackiness so you wanted more of the like drunk I see as a dragon said look it says never again

and throws the bottle over exactly it corrupts eyes a couple of times and your cat is eating your computer i think oh my or like is making a dragon in the movie i saw recently uh... start uh... the dragon the movie start

not like the dragon the movie i saw recently new york new york starting from originally the dragon was figurative. Not like the dragon, the movie so I saw the other day, Garden of the Fitsy Continues. Fuck off. Sorry. No, you're just making up words. I must come off as such a pretentious asshole in these five years. I like to think that that's your part and to play in the jigsaw puzzle that is the flop house though I see okay, you promise me yeah, where's this? No, no, let's let's first. Let's just put it quickly the final judgment on on Dragon Wars

They promised is it a movie that you thought you don't like it all movie that you thought was a good bad movie or a movie that you Kind of liked a little bit so what it what do you say Elliot? Well, I mean, I believe I've mentioned this. I'm kind of on the halfway point between good bad movie and movie I liked a lot as hard as it is for me to admit it because I mean, there were many bad movie things about it that were funny, the massive stupid exposition and things that happened for no reason and the villain getting hit by two cars in a row. And but then on the other hand, I can't lie. I genuinely enjoyed watching helicopter's fighting dragons. Yeah, what I'm going to go on this is that, I think that ultimately it's a very dull movie,

really, for being 90 minutes long, because there is so much exposition and a little too much dragon fighting. However, if you do watch it, I think you will enjoy it if you start an hour in. watch it um... i think you will enjoy it if you start an hour in and finish before twenty minutes before the end exactly and then you'll just get a like a solid uh... dragon war just like a taste yeah i think this one of those movies i could have watched uh... if my dvd player had a shuffle function and just like randomly bounced around i think they would have been ideal

i'm gonna go the middle ground as well. I still, I got it, and then I was disappointed. I don't know what I was quite expecting and this wasn't quite it, but it wasn't bad enough for me to hate. All right, well, that's mixed. Well, before I get on to a surprise, I do wanna make an announcement that I forgot.

Oh, fuck. This is called Building Suspense. The audience is on the edge of their you know their subway seats if they're like commuters listening to us or I don't know. I don't know. Where else people listen to that if they're listening to help them fall asleep sitting in the edge of the trolley, they're riding around. Because they're trolley drivers. Anyway, I do want to say before I move on, an announcement I did want to make at the beginning of the podcast.

This is our first May podcast. That means May sweeps. Which applies to podcasts, Merle. Yeah, it does. And we're recording this on Mayday, so get out there, communist, Merle. It does. And we're recording this on Mayday, so get out there, Communists, you know. I just wanted to let everyone know that we're doing this podcast completely nude for

May sweeps. So put that image in your brain and smoke it. You are wearing a hat and Stuart has Argotl socks on. And an artificial penis. Strapped on next to my actual penis. So stay tuned for other Maysweep stunts but I do want to say the big surprise is the return of listener male. I think you're going to like this. However it's negative. I think you're going to like this piece of male. It's from a Courtney last name withheld.

That's actually her last name. What is this? Is it a her? It could be a dude. Well, it probably was last name visual. And when she came to Ellis Island, her family was finally changed into last name. Americanized it. But the subject line is. American idolized it.

I think I am in love with you. Oh nice. Written to Elliot, I'm sure. I don't think so. I think I am in love with you. Oh nice. Written to Elliot, I'm sure. I don't think so. I'm going to give my video. Actually, I know I am. You guys seriously rock. I realize the other week that I must have somehow

subscribed to your podcast at the beginning of your reign. My mistake. And I feel a better person for it. Thanks for making random hours of my week's better. I only wish there were more podcasts to listen to. I've had to resort to listening to your podcasts multiple times. Plus, I have fallen hopelessly in love with Stuart Wellington. So please pass the word on to him that there's some girl on the West Coast in love with him. Courtney. Oh my god. Well, I don't know how to respond to this. How do you respond to it?

You quit your job. You go to the West Coast. OK, West Coast. You cut all time. You're not going to everyone's door. You're not going to everyone's door in California, or in Washington State, or possibly Western Canada. And sort of a romantic comedy version of the Terminator.

Yep. I got well, I'll start out with a nice bouquet of flowers which will slowly be We'll take my hair. I just wanted to open this up for discussion and And a little thing called flop house conversation corner to put it out there What do we think it is that has made this girl specifically fall in love with Stewart's like well he's got a beautiful voice. He does have a low low voice We think it is that has made this girl specifically fall in love with Stuart. He does have a low, low voice. Very white-esque.

Also, I think he's unafraid to put his horning-ness on display. There's a raw sensuality there, yes. The same way that women are attracted to the wolf from Tex Avery's droopy cartoons. I'm going to take your word for that. Yeah. I'll take your word for that one, but it's like he's invading her brain through her ear hole. Yeah. Well, that's horrible.

It's like a weird like, like Mr Mr. Hyde like magnetism I think like you're like Shannon tweed in one of those movies where she's a like a radio sex therapist only you're like the male version Well, Angela, Angela Davies in the hit TV show best sex ever where she is also sure I Like the Shannon tweed reference a little better. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's classic. It's classic Classic soft core point your actress doesn't have the uvra that Shannon tweeted. Yeah, there's a short Joan Severance. Nice. You know the black scorpion? Yeah.

Sure. I think there's a pretty exciting email though. Do you have any words? Hey, thanks. I don't know much else. He's a charmer. Yeah. Well done, man.

Strong silent type. Yeah, I don't know what else to say. Yeah. All right, I'm not drunk enough rightmer. Yeah. Well done, man. Strong silent type. Yeah, I don't know what else to say. Yeah. All right. I'm not drunk enough right now. Yeah. Well, that Lister male segment went out with a whimper. Yeah, a little bit, but like a puppy love whimper.

Yeah. I thought it was sweet. Yeah, I thought it was very nice. Should I have been shouting more? Yeah. It had a nice quiet ending, like Spider-Man 3. So... It's technically accurate reference. I want to talk about movies recommend because I've been thinking about it since the last time I didn't have anything to talk about.

It's been your magic. Come on. So, stop some tariff on us. Hey, flop house viewers. This is the time in the podcast when we kind of, you know, we go away from shitty town or wherever we were and we go and talk about movies that we actually like. And right now I want to talk about a little movie that I watch recently called Nightmare Man that is directed by the guy directed a movie I really liked, a guy named Ralph Kineski or something. A Rald doll. Yes, he's a big kid. Yes, Raldal.

And he directed another horror movie called The Hazing that was really good with Brad Dorif, you know, the guy who does the voice of Chuckie. And this movie Nightmare Man was one of the after-dark for the... Oh, I didn't see any of those, was it? Well, they're usually not very good. And this one I think is shot video to video, which is always a bad sign and some of the acting's not very good. However, there's a totally weird twist about two-thirds of the way through

the movie. I think there's some nudity and it's got an actress. Check it off. Check it off your checklist as you go. I'm pretty sure. This is a raw sensuality we were talking about earlier. And there's a crossbow and a demon and yeah it's totally worth watching. I love that these are the elements you picked up on. Oh shit my phone's really. It must be the nightmare man. One of the elements was a crossbow. It might be one of Stuart's many paramores. Yeahers yeah was it her what did she say she said that she doesn't like me anymore oh it's terrible yeah Courtney last name with held you're so fickle fickle is woman yeah took away her support so nightmare man it's pretty good if you like horror movies like me. Mm-hmm. Well, I actually haven't seen a lot of movies.

And a lot of the movies I did see recently, like there's something wrong with them, or like... Well, they weren't like... Ouch. You said it like they turned out to be television shows. Or one was actually a dog. Well... One of them actually shot jelly instead of water and one at square

wheels. It's a weird, weird, misfit toly joke. Anyway, well, no, like Angel Heart. I saw Angel Heart and like for two thirds of the movie, I'm like, this is great. And then, and then Angel Heart, personally call it. And then at the end, a fat man comes in and explains all of the crazy twist in a long exposition scene that doesn't make any sense. And then he gets killed by boiling and a pot of gumbo. And that's when the movie fell apart for me. But, oh yeah. But I'm two thirds of the way through Escape from Alcatraz, directed by Don Seagull,

an excellent pulp film director who did the first invasion of the bodies, Nighteers and Dirty Harry. I can't speak to the whole film as I'm two thirds of the way through it, but I really enjoy it. I got it because I went to Alcatraz when I was in San Francisco. And it's really interesting to actually see a movie where, because Alcatraz was shut down and then turned into a national park, like everything looks exactly the same in the movie as it did when I visited it,

rather than usually if you see a location in person, it's changed so much since that movie was made. Hey, isn't Alcatraz called the rock? It is called the rock. You may be familiar with it from the film The Rock. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw that movie. Yeah. Nicholas Cage has put a good in that one.

It's the ladies love it. That's out. The segment is falling apart before your very ears. I have not, I mean, I've seen some things recently I thought were okay. Recently, trying to think back to the any movies I saw, the reason that I really liked a lot, saw Torn Curtain which I hadn't seen before, that's okay. So I recommend a movie that I didn't watch recently but I just recommended to somebody else and they enjoyed it, which is Cat Ballu or Cat Ballu with the first Strain Jane Fonda and Lee Marvin, which is a Western comedy

that is narrated through song by Stubby K and that can call and it is just a lot of it's like a huge amount of fun. It's the movie that Lee Marvin won best supporting actor for he plays a dual role of a drunken gunfighter and an evil gunfighter with a metal nose. And it's all about this girl whose father is a rancher who gets killed and she becomes an outlawed at revenge him, but it's very funny, but there are also some touching scenes and like touching like heartwarming, not touching like some-

Mike Robert Forster. Yeah. Yeah, same the third reference. Oh no. It's just a lot of fun and it's a very good movie. like Robert Forster. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. value. Yeah, even even Mr. Wellington likes I saw I think I watched it originally because I thought there might be new

I was like 13 like 1966 The word cat was in the title which suggested a certain Disappointed yeah, but there's it. There's also it's also nice to see Jane Fano and she still has certain innocence about her before she became this kind of weird half political half crazy woman, you know, after dragon. All dragon. All dragon. That was the original tagline for dragon wars, half political, half crazy, all dragon. It wasn't you're never home alone when you're a twin. Yeah, I was gonna say this is gonna be our shortest flop house yet. So if you have any thing you want to say before we go about Stewart's love life or Stewart wants to say anything about twin setters. This is the time.

Yeah, I really want to see the movie twin setters. So if you have a VHS copy of the barbarian brothers action comedy You should mail it to 1345 fake street in any town USA Brooklyn New York Yeah, I live in a same part. It's okay I live in a team bar. Is that okay? It's a neighborhood. It's a neighborhood.

It's a neighborhood. It's a neighborhood in the borough. It makes you feel like you go home and go like, oh, it's time to go to work and you put on a sash that says mayor at a top hat. It carries around a pair of giant scissors. Another fucking ribbon-cali. Christ. Why are they opening so many new businesses in any town?

Oh, yeah. There's so much urban revitalization in this part of the city. ribbon-cali Christ why are they opening so many new businesses in any town? So much urban revitalization in this part of the city Oh god damn it another fucking cookie factory Why? The two big industries that are ribbons and scissors Another novelly-sizzar creation factory If I could introduce I don't know I don't know, this goes against anything, but this on the floor. But I think the listener letter segment was such a hit that if any listeners at home have any questions or interesting ideas to put forward to the Flop House crew that you'd like to see addressed in a future episode, let us know.

Yeah. Or if you read Dragon Wars and want to share your thoughts on it I mean do it in written form. I think all those things are or start up your own suggestions rival podcasts No, don't do that call it the mop house Do you use swiffer's what do you guys think about him? Wait a lot of dust It's not really a rival Oh, I'm so also gonna tell you different Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, ruined a lot of discs. It did really well in our having dragons in it tests though. Oh, that's good, yeah, that's...

Speaking of which, if you want to get in touch with us, like Courtney Lastname withheld, you can write us at the Flophouse Podcast at gmail.com. And also if you go to the Flophouse Podcast.blogspot.com, you can get a link to now we are on Facebook, or if you're just on Facebook and you search for groups, the Flophouse Group, you can join the Flophouse Group, and you can do discussions there very easily and do all your web 2.. interacting like kids do. Did you want stop flop shop? Stop shop. What? Yeah, that would be. One stop flop, stop. House. The mob house, everyone. Next week we're talking about swifters. Classic yarn mobs versus polyester mobs, which picks up better.

Well, anyway, on that note of complete gibberish we have a letter here at the mob house I have a hardwood flooring in my apartment and I problem with cat hair for the last time the mob house is not a podcast for people who want to make a house out of mobs that's a house out of a mobs podcast. Oh, that's, that's good. So, yeah, Dragon Wars was a movie we watched. Wait, you should do the sign off.

I'll do it as if I were you. Okay. Peace out, dudes. Nice. Wait, we're also supposed to say our names, though right okay, but that's pretty good the one with the low Sultry voices Stuart Wellington the guy who's talking right now was Dan McCoy and I'm Chris McCool Good night. Yeah Oh, man, this this podcast was the silliest I think we've had in a while. Well, we did watch a movie called Dragon Wars.

I'm not about to get bored, but just right now. Actually, we just... Ha ha! We should keep it shorter than you, because I have a surprise for you guys. A surprise! Fuck off! I hope each of us gets a key, and we have to find out what it goes to. Yeah? I hope each of us gets a key and we have to find out what it goes to. I hope that we each get part of a sandwich and we have to decide how to make that sandwich using teamwork.

But it's one piece of bread and another piece of bread and a piece of cheese. That would be pretty easy. Yeah, that's not a great challenge. Alright, yeah, let's start. Let's start.