The Flop House - The Flop House: Episode #156 - 3 Days to Kill

Episode Date: July 12, 2014

Producer Luc Besson and director McG made a bet about the number of tones they could cram into 3 Days to Kill, and the audience lost. Meanwhile Elliott does his classic "2000 Year-Old Killer" routine, Dan gets more inappropriately sexual than ever before, Stu introduces the concept of a "neck baby," and TVs Jessica Williams stops by, because why the heck not?Movies recommended in this episode:The LimeyThey Came TogetherObvious ChildThe Sea Wolf

When Mick G teams up with Luke Besson and Kevin Costner, what could possibly go wrong? We discuss three days to kill. Hey everyone, welcome to the flop house, I'm Dan McCoy, co-storing Stuart Wellington, and featuring Elliot Kaelin. I'm go Williams. Yeah, that's right. We got a game in the flop house. Can Jessica Williams survive the flop house experience? Where are you being?

Look at Dan, he's the creepier one. Oh, Dan, are you going to do anything weird that we should know now? I don't think so. Oh my god. Please don't. We have a guest, oh. Yeah, guys, listeners. And you still guest

born on walls. Who you will not be hearing from? They're just in the corner. They're gonna get bumped. So listeners may know Miss Jessica Williams from the Daily Show. They may know her from girls. They may know her from that soccer show she did. Can I tell them what they don't know me from? What don't they know? I'm not the voice of around the horn, or the around the horn intros. I just want to make sure everybody knows that.

I don't know what they're saying. Oh, I can't forget that. That's probably not your demo, but it is this, I think it's a sports show on ESPN. Oh, I know that show. I always get, people always ask me if I do the voices for around horn. I think I have a voice doppelganger. I just want to clear up once and for it. You know what's weird is it's just five guys. Oh no. No. You sound just like me. It's terrible.

It's just a bunch of guys standing around a horn. There's a French horn in the horn. classy horn yeah makes a move to reach it to play for it and they just pull their hand back yeah because they're embarrassed they got to be around the horn they can't play the horn yeah that's not the rule so we're a horn pod guys welcome to the flop horn do we talk about horns and the flops that created them thank you for telling me tonight

oh there she goes well subject thanks for being here. Well, I was sitting in that corner eating biscuits away. That's what he's eating. Oh, he's eating his something in jam. He's eating his... Is what, like his... I don't know. I don't know what.

Eating his words. Okay. We'll talk about more things we don't know about. Well, not a big guy on physics, but talk about more things we don't know about. Well, not a big guy on physics, but it seems that things are made up of atoms and Adam is a good name. So I know I named Adam, so I guess there's lots of tiny hymns that make them all furniture. Adam Aguayan. Yeah, you had all Canadian director Adam, Adam, Arminian Canadian director, Adam Aguayan.

Makes up everything. You get two or more at him a go in together you get a molecule of going yeah or Exotic So cool much nonsense. That's how we do it here. Yes, Dan. What do we actually do on this podcast? Well, it's mostly a garbage podcast No, I do too version 2.0. Come on. Anyway. We should all note that Jessica is at least 10 years. No, but like me. Just like seven years. Yeah, I'm only seven years. Well, I mean, you talking about garbage, the band. I got that. I can't get into the garbage. I can't get into

garbage the band's specificity the way you did. And instead of like being like, uh-huh, uh-huh, I made a brave choice and was like, you know what? I can't get in there that specifically. You didn't want to seem like you were down with all the references and just play along. It would have been just very authentic. Yeah. It's a garbage-peel kids. I would have been just very authentic, so. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I like New Jersey what garbage plates.

But they put a lot of food out of the way. The number of Pokemon Isobby. So the need after going out to the clubs. Garbage plate. OK. So Dan, what do we do with this? OK, sorry. To introduce the premise of this podcast.

I'm not necessary to say those words, but that's not what we do on the podcast. What did we just do? We watched a bad movie that happens prior to the taping. Okay. And then during the taping, which is now, we talk about it. Kind of like a review show. Well, more of a discussion panel.

Okay. But really more of a comedy show with a bad movie focus. So would you where are we easy listening? We are adult contemporary except for Jess who is What would you define yourself as probably like a hip-hop jazz kind of thing? Well that file under hip-hop jazz, okay? So is that Stewart's TV show jazz where he solves where he saw his crime as a detective named Jazz? And that's different than Stewart Wellington's

sex describer, where I talk about people I've exact. That's a different show. That's on later. That's like 11.30. That's on, yeah. That's on later. I don't know anymore. That's on Showtime at 3.42.

It's a very specific time in the morning. Showtime, it de-scramble. It did scrambles and you have to keep flipping back and forth to on-scramble. Yep, you have to run that show through the VCR, which sort of on-scramble it a little bit, but not really. Uh-huh, and you have to squint your eyes like a magic eye painting.

And even then half the time you just get that video drum show. Yep. Anyway, the movie we watched tonight though, was a movie called, I don't recall. It was called Three Days To Kill, Dan. Now, three days to kill. That is a generic name for what is kind of a generic movie and kind of an incredibly weird not generic movie. Now, Jess, we gave a lot of options,

and you went for this one. Why? I don't know, actually, I'm kind of bummed about You put me in between like a rock a hard place and then it was about seven minutes in that you're like we should have watched the I think one of the places was a movie already saw too. Yeah, you said we should watch Pompeii But you already saw that I already saw Pompeii. I know you guys should watch Pompeii So let's pause the podcast talk a I already saw Pompeii. I know you guys should watch Pompeii Don't let's pause the podcast talk a little bit about Pompeii

Let's talk about three days to go yeah Elliott talk about why you give us so let's break up. Okay, so Kevin Costner's in this movie and he's a I don't know a serial killer Yeah, he's playing mr. Brooks He's playing Mel Brooks again the 2000 year old serial killer. Yeah, he's playing Mr. Brooks. He's playing Mel Brooks again. The 2000 year old serial killer. My parents love Mr. Brooks. So did you know Jesus Christ? Uh, yeah, I killed him. That's the 2000 serial killer. What happened to Holy and Sir? Did you know Napoleon?

Him I killed too. Yes, tell us a little about Abraham Lincoln. I wore his skin. Captain Minnet Dungeon. It's a one note premise. But Mel Brooks is just so good. Yeah. Anyway, so three days to kill. Look, let's not underestimate Carl Reiner's consciousness. No, without a straight man like that, Mel Brooks could never have come up with the different ways he killed all of those historical figures. Sure. So Kevin Costner plays Ethan Renner, a veteran CIA agent who, his, basic job is just murdering people.

Ethan Renner combining the names, Ethan Hunt from Mission Impossible and Jeremy Renner, the actual actor who took over the born truth. I prefer to think that it combines Ethan from by either Thornton, I believe, with Runner Runner, the Justin Timberlake movie. With a misspelled rumor willis. Yeah. So he is a CIA hitman killer, who in the beginning we see is trying to capture the El Vino,

a man who works for an arms dealer called The Wolf. And the El Vino is about to sell a dirty bomb in a suitcase to a bunch of terrorists in a hotel. Yes, Stuart. I was just going to say that Kevin Costner knows a thing or two about wolves. He's danced with them. He's danced with them. It would have been great moment when he said we're trying to try to down the wolf's

gawd. Yeah, that doesn't dance with him before. And then Grand Green came out and talked to him for a little bit. The actor, not the author. The author would make no sense. Kevin, I was wondering if we could discuss how Catholicism applies to the spy novel. I'm on the new mission right now.

Kevin Costner is a super gravely Batman voice in this. He thinks he has a cold. It turns out he actually... He thinks he has a cold. The mission goes horribly wrong. Everybody's killed except Kevin Costner and Amber Heard who isn't charged the mission and yet just watched it from a rooftop with binoculars and did nothing the whole time. The albino gets away.

There's that not terrible action sequence and Kevin Costner discovers he doesn't have a cold. He has brain cancer which is spread to his lungs which I think means he's dead. But the doctor gives him three to five months to live which according to the movie is three days. Okay. But despite the fact that he doesn't have a cold anymore, he doesn't give up his scarf affectation. Yes, he always wears a scarf, and the scarves are of general different levels of jaundiness. Well, sort of, they're also all just very thin and like casually hanging on his neck. They don't necessarily serve a purpose. Every scarf is meant

to attract someone's eyes We can go this whole thing It was they were like fashion choices that he was making but the other way I justified it was oh He's sick. Maybe this is like a symptom of being sick. He needs to keep his jowls warm Yeah, he doesn't there are certain scenes where it is very clear the Kevin customer is a lot of loose skin around his neck and cheek area It makes it very difficult to chew. That's what it's an ideal quality. His oncologist told him and they're like oh you got the you got Brain cancer that spread to your lungs the most important thing is keep your wildle war You're very you're very you're gonna be acting with some beautiful women

They do not want to see your wife. You're very susceptible to walled chills in your current unhealthy state. So he decides he wants to spend the end of his life getting back in touch with his wife and daughter, who we are estranged from him because he is this gravely voiced murderer, murder monster, who lives in an apartment. First, he goes to a apartment and finds that there's a bunch of squatters from what Senegal. Some are in Africa, but I don't remember really exact country. But due to French law, he can't kick them out.

Yeah. And they were very endearing and very warm. And like, at first, they were the first likable people in the entire film. This basically, you think it's going to take on the plot of the visitor that he comes home. And there's a guy living in his apartment, and he learns that this guy had to live again.

But really, they're just there every now and then when he returns to his apartment, he gets there. And that's just so far. Yeah, and that's not too far of a stretch considering that Luke Besson who wrote this movie made the professional, which is kind of like that of a hitman learning to relearn about life and humans. I thought I meant it was like the visitor

and that it ended with John Renaud just playing a drum somewhere in order to get out his anger at the US immigration system. But it did make us feel like I mean it gave the false sense of the at the beginning of the movie like oh maybe this movie is going to go someplace new and interesting like I did not expect Kevin Costner to come back and find this family of Senegalese squatters. I don't remember in the the, in my home, you know, and like it gave a warmth and spirit that the movie then let down. Totally dissipated.

Yeah. So here's the problem with this movie. Half the movie is an action-adventure spy film. Half the movie is a guy who works too hard and is trying to reconnect with his family. It's like a bad dad soccer dad. It's a bad dad, he's a spy dad bad dad. He's like, if George Butler was a spy or Nicholas Cage was a CIA agent from stolen. It's like if in the weatherman, Nicholas Cage was not a weatherman, but a CIA agent.

It's like if in Mr. Destiny, instead of wishing on a thing, he had a bad relationship with his kid, and he's a spy. It's like if Destiny turned on the radio, and when he turned on the radio, Kat's in the cradle was playing. That's how this movie's like. That's what reminds me that in our last movie, we watched was last Vegas, and that Morgan Freeman's ringtone

when his son called was Kat's in the cradle, which is like, why would you program this? You're just saying through your ringtone, I am called was cats in the cradle, which is like why would you program? You're just saying through your ringtone. I am a bad father How does that song go and the cats in the cradle in the suit It's all about a dead The cojo cover of it that is huge You're a little younger. You might remember the baby Einstein. Oh my dad, I was listening on the subway on the way here. You know why? Because Google fucking

god, I'm a good guy. That is the edgiest baby. Google fucking guy. I'm a baby. The baby takes a long drag in the cigarette. It's a pass of our own. Is Capri 120's? So anyway, the point is he's got these immigrants living in his apartment. In a way, he's an immigrant too. He's living in Paris. The whole movie is set in Paris, aside from the opening. But anyway, so. It's from Paris with love.

To anyone who's familiar with Chris Elliott's comedy special from the 80s action family where the joke was whenever the character is outdoors, he is a hard boiled cop show, whenever he is indoors it is a family sitcom. This movie is basically that, but we are supposed to take it seriously for the most part but there is still like goofy loop bason type jokes and characters because loop bason wrote and produced this McGee directed it, McGee famously of the Christian bail trying to get his attention because a lighting guy was walking past it. But so this movie to make a long story short, Kevin Costner will occasionally go looking, he gets hired for one last spy mission by Amber

Hird playing the low-rent poor man's version of Scarlet Johansson as Black Widow. And they're both like CIA agents, that's the thing. Like it's not like just like the, I don't like it, it's not like she recruits him. Like he was like CIA agent, that's sick. She's trying to pull him back in at a retirement. Yeah. And she does a lot of showing up in sexy outfits in very dimly lit locales and talking to him

and then making, giving him syringes of this magic cancer medicine. Yeah, seer-roading strip clubs. That may save him, but only if he catches and kills the wolf and the albino the ones that got away And were those the ones giving him hallucinations? Yes, and the drugs give him hallucinations which take the form of him If he gets too excited if he gets heart rate gets up. It's the anti-crank. Yeah, I was gonna say like crank three no cranking. Yeah, I have no keep the cranking to a minimum. Crank three yank my crank. Yeah, my crank. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, kids were blasting that and I told them to turn it down. I'm sleeping. Turn it down.

I can't hear my Benny Goodman record. That's great. Classic. Now that was music. But this is one of the many scenarios in which like this movie could have been a lot more fun than it is. Like because I was going to say just what you're saying. Like it's like a crank scenario where like,

oh I got a, you know, with this. You mean Frank Sinatra. I put this medicine in, a crank scenario. He's like, I run the tire shop. I got to put this medicine in to keep myself going, but I'm going to hallucinate unless I drink a bunch of vodka. So it could have been like a cross-dream crank and drunken master, but it was like not that,

instead it's a cross between garbage and a piece of shit. Yeah. And well, here's the thing. This could event. There's a lot of concepts in here that could make for a fun movie. Like a family man spy is a fun idea. He there's one guy who works for the the albino who he becomes kind of friendly with even though he keeps torturing him to get information out of him. Like and he asked him for dad advice because this guy has two daughters. They like, we really like him. Yeah, he uses spy contacts to help his daughter

get through like everyday teen stuff, which is a funny idea. And Dan made a good point that like gross point blank is a movie that handles this type of thing much better and is a really fun movie. And this does it very poorly. Yeah, it's a question of tone. I feel like if you're gonna to do make this kind of movie

where it's just like, oh, we're going to combine ultraviolence with like, low key, like, everyday character comedy. But you've got to really hit that and keep it consistent. This movie, like, the tones veered wildly from scene to scene. Yeah. Like, more so than when like Amber heard is on screen and as you say it's like

Scarlett Johansson as as the black widow and then like Haley Steinfeld as the daughters on screen and all the time We're watching like I don't know one tree Hill or something. It's like a cross between one tree Hill and like danger Diaboli Just like this like Italian spy popcorn comic book movie and then yeah like a like a family drama You know pieces of April or something And I like and for some reason it wouldn't bother me if it was even more extreme But it's just so kind of lame. Yeah, they don't the choices. They may it's like they want it They view a wildly in tone while also being kind of safe in all the choices and even though it feels like every time He has a drug freak out. It's mick-cg gets super excited that he can use his like blurry lens

yeah and is like pound his pulse lens here's the other thing about this every single moment the movie is punctuated with a bass drop and it sounds like somebody was watching the inception trailer on a laptop following the camera around the entire movie but anyway but I will say there's a bunch of good, but fairly well done action sequences in it. There's a fist fight in a bakery between Kevin Costner and a hitman that I like. Baguette, so it's one of those things.

It's one of those things where like- You just like to see French bakery. So you're like, hmm, that looks delicious. But it's like- It looks like salivating during that. I'm a big fan of- That was the Popeye's chicken eat in pursuit. The salivatory glands work in the brain. I had just finished eating it, and then I remembered that I had Popeyes, and- That was the Popeye's chicken he had consumed. Man, salivatory glands, work, and everything.

I just finished eating it and then I remembered that I had Popeye's and it made me hungry Popeye's again. I started drooling all of the time. Because when you saw the hitman's hand get mushed into a working panini press and the sizzle sound made you hungry. Yeah. But I'm a big fan of action scenes in a location where they use a lot of objects from a location in the fighting.

Like if you have a setting for an action scene that has things in it, like I wanna see those things used and they do a fair amount of that. There's a car chase scene that's not so bad, Jessica, I keep cutting you off. No, I'm just gonna say, I totally get what you're saying. Jackie Chan is actually really good at doing that. No matter what he's lost, he's the last one.

It's like, he will always grab like a he'll grab like a laptop and just make that face that Jackie makes and be like, woo, woo, woo, but it's like, you think the bad guys would clear all items from the room? Yeah, you're only fighting him in padded rooms for sensory deprivation chambers. I'm gonna give him into this clean room, this like decontamination and dramatized strain room.

But look, did you know it was a holodeck all along? No. Oh, so things are in here. Yeah, you can probably imagine shit, right? Yeah, she's got a green lantern ring. That he just turns into like ladders that he can swing around or like plates that he can catch before they break.

Yeah, much of Ming Vases they're falling from the ceiling. What, because he's Chinese, they got to be Ming Vases. Oh, they got it. Oh, she get on hell you. Thank you. You're welcome So the point is he's got trouble on his hands from his daughter and from the spies and His wife and his wife well his wife's had a town for a lot of it She gives him the big old tomatoes. I feel like she's a big old tomato She throws the big tomatoes at him which I really loved Somebody had to do it. No, but she she was the one that her only job for the movie was to keep walking in and be like now

Look if you mess this up gone forever That's true. These are the stakes goodbye And then he taught his daughter to ride a bike and then sit and like saved her from almost getting raped in a club That's so crazy. It was a weird scene. Then any bodyguard carried her out of there, right? Yeah, yeah Yeah, they didn't play the bodyguard song on the soundtrack It was a mistake. They don't know the rights left the one and that that sequence where he had his daughter said I'm gonna be at a friend's house, but she went out to party and so he's gonna find her So he's using his spy techniques to track her down. And like that could have been a really fun sequence, but it was kind of lazy.

It's one of these things where instead of using like strategy to get around people, he just shoots people in the foot or punches them a lot. And you're wondering like how is this guy just punching and shooting his way through Paris? Nobody seems to care or notice. He also like with his live and family walked around with a gun a lot like he had guns out and they were like children in the family He had no problem just like pointing it away around Yeah, we get it

We're thankful that you let us live here, but can you take it easy with the gun? Strange message see and the family living with him pays off when the daughter of the in the family gives birth to her baby in front of Kevin Costner And of course they hand the baby to him because as the white guy whose life is at a crossroads he's the one that the resources need to be put towards that baby don't let it suckle at its mom teeth mom see too long as Kevin Costner's got to learn a thing or two about family yeah they were like we will give you to the white man yeah you can be almost trusted with this than us he looks like he needs his faith in life or stored

What what what do we have that is a lot of life force in it? What if I know maybe more faith? But your baby you just gave birth to it. Oh, do you take you take? It's your baby now you needed more than I do. I already have a daughter And I don't know how to take care of her on it. Oh, you're baby. I don't go. Yeah. No, that's your baby mad It's just like them having a live birth in the apartment That's that was I was telling you my worst nightmare. Yeah, my worst French health care is terrible

Your worst nightmare is that give birth in front of Kevin Cosmer? Yeah, well the idea of giving birth already Just gives me anxiety It's a horrifying spirit. My worst nightmare is to give birth in front of my whole family in an apartment and then get it, cost me a walk-sand. And then it holds my baby for a little baby from your hands. That's my nightmare. Snuggles it to his waddle.

I do have food on her. Which it can stay here now. Which it's a, he's just storing stolen babies and some waddle. He swaddles the baby with his baby. Did your neck just cry? No Just give me a dairy queen blizzard than I ordered. I do I do I do I do have to wonder what a measure I said Reese's pieces. These are remnants. Use your eyes Take it back. They taste almost the same. I can tell the difference No, you can't there's no way you can. Yes, I can tell the difference. No, you can't. There's no way you can. Yes, I can.

Sir, I can have some honeywax for me. And your neck baby to leave. I don't have a neck baby. Do you have to call my man? I can see it. It's a hand reaching out from under your neck bottle. Sir, everybody knows you have an neck baby. Everybody knows.

I paid my 259, give me my ice cream. I'm a medium blizzard giving my ice my medium blizzard I want to stay healthy so I didn't get a large Small too small it's not a good satisfaction. I have my like six come on It's not a meal I need it's about eating sensible portions. I'm gonna give a couple spoonfuls to my neck, I mean, my neck. I heard it, I heard it, sir.

Okay, once you're clearly feeding your baby in your neck and two, that baby is not old enough to eat ice cream. It likes it. It likes it. It cannot handle dairy proteins at that age. It's well-man- It's similar. It's similar. Makin, you make it with similar life instead of milk.

I don't think we have these good. It's too late, sir. I'm going to go change my next diaper. I'll be right back. Do you have a creamed spinach blizzard? Yes, sir. We're selling blizzard. Alongside our chop salmon blizzard.

Of course, there's our mash and pork blizzard. Of course there's our there's our mashed pork blizzard. We have our smoked blizzard. That's very our winger blizzard. I'm starting to this is dairy queen right? Let's just disgusting queen. We're gonna spit off a dairy queen that sells gross things. So would you like that pre-digested Sivit poop coffee bean blizzard or no? That stuff's so expensive that you're the most expensive blizzard. It costs $100 for what?

The medium? That's for the small sir. It's $135 for the medium. Oh it's still a pretty good deal then. It's $150 for the large. And I get more than 50% more ice cream, right? I can't afford not to get the large okay The baby in my neck is gonna love this It's a baby in your neck see and that's when he gets around it. Yeah, it's kind of like he has a bottle Quatto

This is well because Quatto was a baby It looks like a grown man, did he? So wait, he was born after the original guy. Clearly that guy was giving birth to C-section. The baby got stuck and he just grew up and became a carol. That is the worst superhero origins to have ever heard. The adventures of Super Stuck, baby. Yeah. It's also like not that far from Athena, maybe maybe right? Yeah, I mean she's sprangfully formed from the brow of Zeus. Yeah, if she got stuck she'd just be a headquatto. Yeah. Quaid, the people need air.

Also I'm the goddess of knowledge and victory in my form of unique case. Also go to Athens, my, this was the city on the patron gato. So, what else have to do with that? My this was the city on the patron got a So What else have so anyway, so it all comes to a head let's just skip straight through it It all comes to a head at prom night where it turns out that Kevin Kostner's daughter's boyfriend's husband's business partner Yes, the wolf and he's for some reason going to prom with them That's what business partners do, dude

So not only in in France, dude, the parents go to prom as well as the kids, but the parents business partners are also invited. And this French prom is jumping. Yeah, it is a club. That's what kids say, right? Jumping in ballin. As a young-ish person, I guess, yeah, we still say that. It sounds different when you do it.

I'll help it. It's a hard to say it. It was just, it was like just... Was it live? Turned up. It was turned up. It I have to say it. It was just it was like just was it live turned up. It was turned up. It's what the phrase is. Yeah, turns with a T turns with a turn to top. Turn up like turn up. I think it turned up. And then turn top like carrot tops brother turned top. I mean, that's not that crazy. Where we went like I mean isn't that crazy. No, that's not that weird. But it was very turned top. There was like probably drugs being used almost certainly There was a special make-out room. Yeah, the daughter went to their boyfriend and and made out

I assume they kind of disappeared from the movie after their big shootout started. So they're probably still having sex in that room, you know I mean it's prom night. He seemed like a nice guy. He did He scores goals in his soccer games. He's not his fault. He's loosely related to that wolf guy sort of or loosely based on a historical figure. Yes, even Douglas If he was a friend a nervous French teen But uh, so there's a little giant shoot up again Is it the wife said notices Kevin Costner is tracking the wolf with his eyes and she says, you're still working, aren't you? And now this is after he hasn't revealed to his daughter what he does for living.

She thinks he might have another family that's a secret. She doesn't love her, but he teaches her how to ride a bike and how to dance and they patch it up. And there's a big shootout at the prom and it ends with, I forgot there was that whole car chase earlier where the albino, this is okay. Let's take a flashback. The albino who is the main henchman and frankly, if he wasn't bald by the way. If he looks like a snake man. If he wasn't bald, he could just pass for a normal guy. He's not that albino.

But his big thing, the way he likes to kill people is by putting them in front of things that are moving so their heads get chopped off. It's very elaborate and very specific. And they're gonna be kind of slow moving things. So in the first scene, he kills an American agent dressed as a, disguised as a hotel maid by sliding her into an elevator shaft and just letting an elevator hit her off. That's right. The old gangster squad elevator attack.

Only whereas James Brolin or Josh Brolin, not James Brolin. Josh Brolin. That would've been great if it was James Brolin. Yeah., boy. He rightfully just used that to cut a guy's hand off. This was to cut a woman's head off. And so he wants to do the same thing with Kevin Costner with a pair of some metro train. And Kevin Costner is hallucinating.

He's tripping balls on this cancer medicine. And but he gets his mojo back and instead throws the albino in front of the train. So anyway. How ironic. The very albino in front of the train. So anyway... How ironic. The very train he was gonna kill the human. It's like rain on the albino's wedding day. A free ride on the albino already paid. It was the train he was gonna marry someday.

Yeah. Do you think he has the nickname the albino is a double blind? So that people are looking for an actual albino, they don't think he's the albino. They should have called him the tan man. And then no one would call him. And I was like, oh, man, he's a man with no hair. Or maybe a light brown. I mean, it was eyebrows, right? Or like Frank, or like Ronnie.

Like a name that it doesn't call dead people. Just to like, in crime movies, like, people should just get rid of all of albino's. Because there's never a good albino in a crime movie. They're always evil and they get killed. They're a really good one. There's powder. That was a crime movie.

Yeah. It was a crime that that movie didn't get a bigger box office. And also the director was a pedophile. So that was a crime movie. Yeah, it was a crime that that movie didn't get a bigger box office and also the director was a Bed of files that was a crime to It wasn't really great albino villain in the matrix. Yeah, there's those two brothers with the dreadlocks Yeah, we're wolves somehow. Yeah, they were vampires. Oh, they were vampires. There's that albino in that Farley brothers movie that turned out to be a good guy. What was that? Was that something about Mary? Was that me, myself, and Irene? Something about me, myself, and Mary and Irene.

Yeah, yeah. It was something about Bob and Carolyn Tedon Allison, me, myself and Irene. Yeah, and let's talk about Kevin. We need to talk about Bob and Carolyn Tedon Allison, Kevin. Rise the plan of the A.S. No, so the point is there's a big shootout. Kevin Costner, again, has a drug attack where he's hallucinating. And you get the ass. No, so the point is there's a big shootout. Kevin Costner again, it has a drug attack where he's hallucinating and you get the idea.

Why don't they rely on this guy? That's the weird thing. Like why is... That's the big question. He's all tripping balls on the juice. It's the eye of him. It never seems to be very good at killing people on her own. So why does she need a sick guy?

He has fucking sick like three days away from dying guy. I like to think she's not that great at killing people and she's, because the only people she kills are either like lying on the ground or tied up to a chair. Yeah, that's true. But it's like, we had, it's never established in the movie what makes him so amazing

that only he can pull this job off. It's like you're the best of what you do and what you do is coughing a lot before you almost accidentally kill the guy who's trying to kill. Yeah, what I do isn't pretty lot before you almost accidentally kill the guy you're trying to kill Yeah, what I do isn't pretty because of the neck wall Yeah, but the scarf covers it up, right? Yeah, you mean that mostly that like tissue thin scarf loosely draped around your neck Yeah, but you can't see anything right. I can see everything

It is why did why did you order the shear risk scar from Agrival should have draped Saran around it was on prime who's Amazon prime I had to do it I bought it to so I could get to the free shipping level. It's more like a cloth necklace It's like a toilet paper necklace so So there's a big shoot out that ends in the riveting scene of a wounding the wolf and a wounded Kevin customer the Boom! Boom! Roasted salad, misdirect. Take that, Ethan Renner. Okay. And...

So luckily, at the last minute, Amber shows up and shoots the skeleton-faced bad guy. Yeah. And then I guess that's the only... The only thing yet again that she could have done it from the beginning. If only he was really skeleton-faced. And I don't mean like the red skull.

I mean like his face is a little skeleton. Like a full skull. Like a greenimping, and then he gets killed. Not like Rim Vendigo. On his neck they're the full skeleton. Yes, the feet start at his neck and go all the way up to his skull, but it's little. And the ribs move when he talks. Kind of like in the sledgehammer video when Peter Graveville's face is made out of fruit. There was a bad guy in a Warhammer fantasy role play,

a role playing game that whose head was a little guy who jumped off and ran around. But if the bottom of the head was running around. Yeah, it was pretty exciting. You had to kill the little guy first. What happened to the body? I think it died, if the little guy died. Oh, okay.

I'll have to go check my source books. But when he's running around around I just like take a You just sat around I think the little guy killed guys and it was supposed to be like a murder You're not telling us what happens with the body. Yeah, the little guy just I think you just chilled out I mean, I guess he's jagging We doing that. Sorry my Decorating for my body is masturbating. I'm not Vin Diesel I don't know everything about role-playing games.

Good point. Good point. So, you're not Vin Diesel, the artist. So, Kevin Costner, today is saved. Well, the wolf has been killed, danced with, if you will, a dance of death. What would you call that, like a Toad Thompson? Yeah, Toad Thompson works.

But, so, then they retired to a house on the beach and Kevin Costner's just dedicating himself to getting back in touch with his daughter again again. Giving her advice on how to skip rocks. Yeah, and how to go to school, I guess. She's not going to school. She's just hanging out. I guess Palm happened.

The year's over, it's the summer. And she's going to rock skipping camp. And Danver heard drives up and she's going to rock skipping camp. And, and Amber, her drives up and she sent him a package, and it's another vile of the serum. So I guess he's cured now. I have a question. Yeah. Was that the last serum he needed to live? I assume so. We're also to cruel joke. Right. Like she's gonna. Well, maybe she's just stringing them along. She likes to watch the puppet dance. I've got another job for you. Four days to kill. So, all right, let's...

That's better than 32 days to kill. Let's move on to... You had two to go. Sure. Three point one days to kill. Two to one oh. So let's go to final judgments. Final judgments.

Where we decided whether this was a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie you kind of liked, Elliot. What do you have to say? Well, where do you fall down to? I think it was. You know what, I'm gonna be generous to it, because there were things that I liked about it, that I didn't like the movie enough to call it a good hit of light. So I'm gonna say good bad in that,

you're not gonna, it's not exciting or interesting, but again, I'm gonna give it my coveted, if it's Saturday afternoon, you're sick, and there's nothing else on TV, go ahead and watch three days to kill. All right. If you're tired of having every other movie that ever existed at your fingertips,

watch three days to kill. Yes, I know you're new to our scheme. It's good bad. A movie that is so bad, it's good. And it's equally terrifying. There's bad bad, a movie that has no value in entertainment terms, or a movie kind of like which I think is self-explanatory. And what do you do, good bad?

No, I said good bad, yeah. Which was being generous. Which is super- It was super, very cool. I'm in a bad bad, I was like, not having a good time. You guys were fine, but you guys weren't enough to carry the movie. Wow.

Wow. Is that our job now? I mean, you said I would come and hang out to the film. It was a long walk over to Dan's house. It took a lot out of me. No, no, no, honestly, I think it was just bad. It is a long walk over to Dan's house. It took a lot out of me. No, no, no, I honestly, I think it was just bad. It is a bad thing.

I do like the person who co-wrote it, but it was like not. Lupus on. Lupus on, I do love him. Lupus on. Lupus on. Lupus on. Look at my bassoons, I love him a lot. No, it was just, it was like bad bad.

I wouldn't even recommend you watch it on a sick day. Just watch like something tighter than that. I mean you made a good point or when we were watching an LA is that Luke Besson seems to be focused so much on producing and writing things when he seems to have a better grasp of the stuff that he's writing when he directs it. Yeah, if he directed this movie, I feel like he would have been able to work out the problems in the script while he's making it and he'd be able to carry that tone a lot better than McGee. Capture the like Silly and Serious which seems to per my permeance. Yeah, which is great.

Who I'm just going to reveal it is former presidential candidate George McGovern. What? The directing movies under the name McGee for a long time. Ever since he lost the 72 election. I didn't know that. Did he direct torque? I was torque of McGee. I'm just gonna quickly say Man's question McGee. It's a bad bad movie

That's something that like you if you said that to an old person They would be like was torque of McGee? They think they were having like a like a stroke I just like I'm tempted to like it just because it goes off in 50 different directions and that's kind of crazy, but ultimately I was too bored. Stu, what do you have to say? Yeah, I'm going to back you up. I think it's bad, bad. I feel like it's a movie that tries to do a twist on the like the secret Asian genre or whatever the secret Asian drama which I guess

is like it's ninja that's basically what it's a ninja drama. It's the Asian version of the human stain. Secret Asian. So Anthony Hopkins plays this character too. But they just they take all these and they try they take all these different spins or twists on the premise, but they've all been done before and it just doesn't Like a spin city if you would. It is like and the city is Paris France. It's the original spin city, yeah Paris. Because that Eiffel Tower is always spinning. Okay, well before we move on. Is that true? Nope.

Before we move on to letters, just a quick word from our sponsor. I just want to note that this episode is brought to you by Squarespace. Thanks. The all-in-one platform, making it fast and easy to create your own professional website, portfolio, and or online store for free trial and 10% off, visit squarespace.com and enter offer code Flophouse at checkout. Now look, we all like the internet. I love it. Why don't you want to be a part of that, man? Why don't you get off the couch and get on the field of the internet? I don't even say get on the web.

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when he was wearing underwear on his neck. Here's the thanks, Squarespace. Squarespace, they're stuffing a baby in his neck. Squarespace makes it simple and easy, with beautiful designs, drag and drop content, and 24-7 tech support through live chat and email. You can start your website at a mere $8 per month, which includes a free domain name if

you sign up for a year. And it's got responsive design. So you can have a website that looks great on a phone or a tablet. The only excuse you have for not taking advantage of this offer and starting a website is if you are armished. And you are overhearing this through the open window of a car that is driving by your buggy on the street. If you can hear it at all

because the person driving that car is cracking up at all the hilarious jokes for a minute. If you can hear over the laughter and you're saying, that's a sinful amount of laughter, but I'm intrigued the next drum spring I will only get one but the next one spring I'll listen to this flap house He's for don't look up the flap house. That's not the name you misheard it. It's flop house. Okay, Jedadaya Tricks of her kids

But anyway, when I started trial with no credit card you wouldn't get that It's a commercial until ofv, I'll forget it, Amish guy. Start building your website today. When you decide to sign up for Squarespace, make sure to use the offer code Flop House to get 10% off your first purchase and show your support for the Flop House. Thank you Squarespace for supporting us and please check them out online at Squarespace.com. Squarespace.com which is nonsense. We'll take you to a 404 forbidden screen. Perhaps it'll be one of those screens which like this URL is

available. Do you want to rent it? Don't go to Squarespace.com, get a URL through that. Or some like Kenny, Kenny Web developer is set up a porn site already under Squarespace. Yeah, there's a domain owner that owns Squarespace that is telling his wife, see? It was worth the purchase. Squarespace, you're placed for the squares splaces. What's your place for squares? So Dan what's this next segment? The next segment is letters from listeners. This first letter. Listen out. Oh God. What are you here? It's a letter calling to you. A letter from you that is calling to you saying, ma'am, ma'am, ma'am, ma'am to the Flapp House. They can't read it. If you

don't ma'am me. me, so mail me right now. What are you waiting for? I know it's 2.30 a.m. break into the post office, put a stamp on me, and put me in a bag. Then steal that guy's uniform, kill him if you have to. Deliver me directly to the house. If you don't know the address, look it up in a directory. You didn't say your address though, that's pretty good. And the address is Dan McCoy, care of the flop house,

one, two, nine flop house street, flop USA, earth. Wait, what? That's the zip code? Yeah, that's the zip code. So anyway, I'm waiting. I'm a letter displayed's waiting in the mail slot When will they read me will they read me now or will they read me next will they read me last? Well, they read me at all. It's time for them to read me what's taking so long

Ellie, it's to hop the song It's time to read me alone at the floppas It's time to read me alone at the fluff house with letters from the fluff house, or the fluff house, do the fluff house, up the fluff house, buy the fluff house, show my parish from the earth. Right. So this first letter is from Caroline Lasting with Hell. You just say, you know, it's long. Like this.

I'm a long time fan who's never written until now and it's only because I rarely miss an opportunity to be pedantic about classics. During the Star Wars episode, Elliott said he believed it was the Roman lawyer and politician Cicero, who overcame a stutter by training himself to speak clearly with pebbles in his mouth. He didn't say, I dare you to contradict me, classics nerds, but I must gently correct the usually unfaible. That's implied anytime I say any such thing. Mr. Kaelin, this is an anecdote about the Greek orator Demosthenes, who speak to petty it.

Is usually described as a stutter, but actually had the symptoms of cluttering like Winston Churchill and or rotasticism like Jonathan Ross. Is it a hoarder? Clothing? No one with a speech impediment should actually try this technique because even though small objects didn't come with choking hazard laser labels and Dazs They come with choking hazard lasers, which I guess the lasers. Yeah, I need to put some of the road if they're choking to burn it open

Put some of the thing in my name in my mouth. No, but Marvel's in your name Dan Marvel's McCoy Actually, it's not like sounds like a 20s villain. Yeah, he said you're a gangster now. Marbles McCoy. Hey, Shayne, Dictacie. Yeah, play with the Marbles, you might get burned. All right, well. That doesn't make sense. Why would you get burned by Marbles?

I just, I'm just, I'm just, if you were matches McCoy, that would make sense. So you're gonna move on to an X paragraph S for the rest of the podcast. I didn't think anything new could be contributed to the now 14 year tradition of commentaries about how much the prequel sucked compared to the Originals, but I was wrong. You guys were consistently funny where so many review viewers have descended into hyperbole and merely listing the beats of the plot and a disgusted voice. You stood out from the herd like a shot of a character the audience actually cares about, contrasted with one of the many computers generated crowds cluttering the background of these damn prequels. Caroline last name with Held in the city. Yeah.

Well, thank you for writing. Thank you for writing. We were pretty great talking about Star Wars. And for the correction, I will remember that it was Dimastin E's until probably tomorrow. That's a like yeah, that thing sister wrote did small victory push kids around the playground. Yeah. Can I make a small plug for a different podcast? The Cicero podcast?

Yeah, Cicero pod. It's the Cicero house. No, just that I've been re-listening to a lot of Star Wars minute episodes, and I want to recommend that to any Star Wars fans listening. Sure. Great show. Great podcast. Especially when we're on.

Anyway, greetings esteemed floppers. I recently had a somewhat confusing movie experience and was wondering if you could help me. It's called Last Year at Marion Bam. My problem is this. Last night I watched the Twin Peaks' Slash Fire Walk with me, Prickwell. Sleepwalk with me, starring Mike Probiglia. I kept on waiting for the big reveal, where it was disclosed that Mike was the host of an alien parasite and that during his sleepwalking episodes he was engaging in an alien-fused, spree of violent

sexual adeviants. But though I watched an entire movie, it never came. Additionally, there was an area mentioned of Twin Peaks, or the entity known as Bob. And added an element of surrealality. What? Surreality? Surreality? No, that's not it.

Surreality. Let's sayiality. Let's say surrealism. That's when you buy that house from House of Leaves. Was that the tone and atmosphere could not have been more different than other members of the franchise. At first I was really frustrated that yet again many Twin Peaks questions have been left on the answer.

However, the more I thought about it, it became clear to that the director was doing a really thorough job of setting the table for an upcoming movie to take place chronologically after sleepwalk with me and before firewalk with me. Yeah that black lodge has been on the market for a long time. We just can't move, we can't flip this place. The big revelation. We bought the place, we removed all the backwards talking midgets, we thought they would do it. It's right across the street from the white lodge.

We took up all that red and black and only, I'm going to put in just a little bit of sugar. Those are the only ones right over hardwood floors. Why would they cover that up? Yeah. The big revelation of Mike's pravity was going to be incredibly powerful now that a whole movie was built up as an earnest, fundamentally nice guy pursuing his dream. Immediately it started daydreaming about casting the most important role. Obviously a young Bob. A number of names flitted across the gaze of my mind's eye James Franco Taylor Lautner Etc The number the force of a Saint Bernard Palsy on Charles Grotin. It's struck me Beethoven. This is the Dan McCoy vehicle America's been begging for

Only purposefully number one has the strategic reserves of purve to do this role justice I like the idea that this it's the story of how Bob went from just ogling other men's wives butts to possessing people and raping their daughters. Oh boy. And murdering them. What do you think Dan? Is this something you would consider? Comedy Bud, guys.

Lames David Lynch, buddy, I didn't write Twin Peaks. With a handful of TV acting friends in your belt, I know you must be casting about for a breakout role. Don't forget the two in Twin Peaks franchise did much to launch the star of David to Coveney, a star which continues to rise. But never only upon us to this day, please consider it. Best regards Ryan last name with hope. That was very funny but on a correct misconception. Sleepball with me is not a prequel to Firewall with me, is a prequel to Inland Empire. Oh, okay. A different David Lynch move. So Jesse, you'll see a trend here. Dan reads letters that are

Dan Centric. Yeah, I was about how Ellie it was wrong about you. Right yeah you wrote and you wrote one read one about how it was wrong. Oh it's weird. It's weird that you misspoke that he wrote that letter. Yeah I'm interested. Wait a minute yeah I may perhaps my misspeaking has led us to a real truth. That's right. I read like your real sister over movie star playing a force of evil Yeah, but you're playing it before he becomes a force of you. You're like Anakin. You're like he's saying you're the Hayden Christian Center of the Twin Peaks franchise. Yeah, all right while I started sharing crap glass and then not do anything else Or maybe you're the Jake Lloyd of the program sure now this is Ruined by it's what you're saying yeah, because he had a lot of potential

Okay, well anyway Jake Lloyd son of a lot of potential. Well, anyway. James Lloyd's son of Christopher Lloyd, of course. Thank you for that letter. Moving on. He's what? Nothing. Moving on. Any updates on Elliot's Kickstarter three-part documentary, Scatting with a Cat, Offensive

to Traction and Tracting Offices? We have yet to reach our goal. I ask because at a recent trivia night in Brooklyn hosted by Elliot's nemesis John Hodgman, he expressed surprise and disbelief when an audience member informed him that MC's sketch cat was fully one half Romani Malko for shame. Clearly he is not the brainy act he holds himself out to be. Please do Mr. Hodgman and the world of the service and release your sketchumentary as soon as possible. Also, why does Flinthardt Glamgold have a Scottish accent if he's from South Africa? Shouldn't he have some sort of borrace of flexion?

Then certainly Romney last name with health. So it's Romney Nelson? Well, I asked you your Flinthardt Glamgold's question. I'm going to look at Sean Connery and Highlander. He is a Scottish accent and he's regent. But Sean Connery and the untouchables, he's from highlight or he is a scotish accent needs to be it it's a it's a and

the untouched was his first of the cuckoo he's a scotish accent but also you know shankar in robin and marion he's robin hood he has a scotish accent if you look at uh... at the first parent that's not yet outland he's an outer space in the as a scotish accent if you look at the first appearance of one-time long-old uh... in carl barks is the second richest duck, you see that he is wearing the Scottish hat.

So one can only assume that Flinthardglomgold, well, the clomgold is a Scottish name. Yeah, he's an ex-patriot. I assume that he is a Scottish guy who is unhappy that there was not enough racism in Scotland to move to South Africa. He went there to exploit whatever he could. Because he is the evil or of the two greedy, blue-cracken ducks. Yep.

He said, how do we make a hero out of a character whose main characteristic is greed? I guess we'll make the other guy a racist. A racist duck. He's really hates swung. He hates beagles. Oh, okay. Yeah, the beagles. It gets swung. It gets beagles. Oh, okay.

Yeah, the beagles are clearly the oppressed minority. Yeah. Okay. You know, the ratio of beetles and jails to ducks and jails, it's appalling. Juries are 10 times as likely to send a beagles to the duck. Well, they're doing it because it's just a lot easier to feed a bunch of beetles than beetles and ducks. You know, if you only have to feed one animal,

because ducks don't eat beagle food. No, he bred. All you need is kibble and bred. It's a lot cheaper to just serve kibble, not kibble and bred. The bread is incredibly cheap. Yeah. You get stale bread too.

Yeah, it doesn't have to be good bread. They're ducks, they're idiots. They don't know. They're pretty robust. They're basically chasing the almighty dollar to notice how they're... They're not like stale beagles. They're not like stale beagles. They're not like stale beagles. They're not like stale beagles know They're too busy chasing the almighty dollar to notice that My beagle race is Look you got to get I'm gonna introduce you to some beagles that will change your mind turn your round on things scare me straight

Yeah, they're gonna scare you Beagle Alright, so I've got one last letter for the evening It starts out. I love you all especially Dan But you're ruining my word. Can I veto this letter? Can I use my- Can I be the Soviet Union on the Security Council and just veto this? It's barely about me. Can I be the Russian judge who gives a zero to this, you see? After repeated recommendations from my friend, Cal, I finally got around to listening to you- Cal L Superman. Sure. We're Cal Pin. We're Cal L Pin, who is Superman in the White Castle movie.

I finally got around to listening to you while on holiday this year. This led to the unedifying sight of my white and not-so-tight Irish frame, wobbling and saysently as I gaffled my way through entire afternoons at the beach. My wife was understandably curious, so I played her an episode while we were drifting off to sleep. I'm guessing she didn't like it. Secure in the presumption that she would find Elliot's voice annoying, Stewart's love of bizarre horror and penitentable,

and the lack of respect afforded Dan, generally mystifying. Not so much. She loved it. Remained it the fluop-oop. She doesn't have an acquired brain injury. She's just Australian. I don't know how that's still, I just don't know. I was just a little bit more. I was really saving silly. You know what they call a car in Australia?

A car? No, it's like a crank, a wing, a blanket, all right. And she knows. Now what they call a nose in Australia? What? It's like nose, but they say it funny. I'm sure. No, he's exactly.

She now insists that we listen to it every night in bed. This means that until we manage to burn through your entire back catalog the most fun I will have in our bedroom is regular dreams and live it by twisted versions of Cazofriks and visible maniacs and southern bells reading Belgian cartoons. So this is really the cock block house. Yeah. Her favorite part is Bafflingly, Elliot's male bag tunes. It's her birthday. It's Baffling. Yeah's baffling, yeah. It's baffling why that's not everybody's favorite part. It's her birthday soon, the 12th of December, so this is a very lately. Thanks Dan. I'm not reading it on time. So maybe it's almost in time for the next birthday. Maybe a brief happy birthday song

might say to her flute-boop appetite and help return our late night routine to something approaching normality. Failing that, crank up the pervazoiding, cramp up the pervazoid. So I can't let me use your pervazoid so it doesn't cramp up. Have some sweeter dreams. Yours in a muse exhaustion. Patrick and Chrissy, last name withheld, Melbourne. Well, I'll say, hey, Melbourne. Hey, Melbourne, it's your birthday today or rather one person in the

city has today today and by today I mean months ago happy birthday related because Dan did you hear your pants? I wish you could see just because dancing but you can't hear it but it fits the song you only get one birthday a year, but this year you get two. The day we read the letter and the day you get older, two birthdays, dead at a boulder. Couldn't think of another where they're on with older. I guess we'll have to solder this together when you read it it rhymes. I guess what I'm saying is yeah letter. Okay, we're expecting perfect. I guess what I'm saying is had you had letter. Okay, we're great perfect. I guess what I'm saying is Chrissy That was the name right yeah Chrissy it's your birthday

Seven months ago Dan to be done the spirit like that we're off and you like the letter songs. Yeah So anyway, this is the last segment of the podcast where we recommend movies that we actually liked in contrast to movies like Three Days to Kill. Let's do, I feel like you haven't gone personal while I want to take this one. Putting me in the hot seat. You're always in the hot seat. You're always in the hot seat. What's his link, Sam?

So I'm gonna recommend a movie about a bad dad. Trying to get in touch with his daughter. His daughter. His daughter. His whole playing for Kings. Getting even with that. Oh, King Lear's done all these things. So that movie in the theaters playing with getting in with Dad.

You can't learn to that, Dad. You're going to get to do this to others. Sounds howl on a blessed heat. I'm going to recommend Steven Soderbergh movie called The Limey about a bad dad, played by Terence Stamp, who is trying to get in touch with his daughter's killer, played by spoiler alert Peter Fonda, who gives a great performance. Terence Stamp's great, Peter Fonda's great.

This was, I think my first introduction to Steven Soderbergh movies, and I think it's a nice slow kind of patient movie. It does some interesting stuff by using pulled footage from an early Terence Stamp movie for flashbacks. Poor cow, I think, right? Poor cow, exactly. And I totally recommend it. So, alignment, I'm not gonna go too into detail

because I haven't seen it super recently. I would like to recommend a movie that I saw this Monday. When I saw it, it was an advanced screening, although it was a screens forward, wasn't it? Yeah, because we are banking this ahead of time, since both Elliott and I will be out of town in the next couple of weeks. I believe that this movie will be out in general least by the time this goes into your ear holes. I saw a little movie.

And now some other holes. I saw a movie called They Came Together in a screening at BAM and... I think they lived together. It was nice because stars and director of the movie were there. David Wayne and we pull her. This is becoming the new all-rudd, Elie and Peretion thing. Where are the original movies?

Where you see the stars of the movie and the screen. Dan, just to recommend movies on planes. Now, it recommends going to see screenings where the director and the stars are. I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm proud of you, man. But, but, but, but, but, but, but, I'm talking about I'm talking about I'm talking about I'm proud of you man

It's a very funny movie though is it very it's um, you know Don't know tell us my it's written by Wayne and show Walter Who previously collaborated on wet hot American summer. This is not in the state. Yes. This is not as funny as wet hot American summer guarded recommendation not like how to marry Quarrel fives dims. I mean like that's a pretty high standard to live up to Like that's a very funny movie. I'm just saying that to keep people's expectations at a reasonable level. It's funny you're then the backster. Yes, it's a very funny movie. It has a lot of the red, white, hot American summer field.

It has oddly kind of like a lot of the early Zucker Brothers field. It combines that state humor with that airplane style humor. It's a spoof of romantic comedies. It's maybe at its most facile when it's just like calling out the tropes of romantic comedies. There are parts of the movie where they're just like literally stating like I'm the guy who does this thing and this thing like and just like all right well this is kind

of funny because like you got funny people saying these lines but it's a little easy what you're doing But are you recommending? No, no, no, I'm just saying like that's like the weakest part of it But for the most part one have stars for the most part It's a lot clever than that a lot sharper and a lot funnier. They're like getting eaten by a shark So stand with me. I Cannot like this is the problem of the, like where you can't give like a nuanced review of something where you have to say something easy to do.

Rocksert sucks. No, I think, I'm just saying you should lead with the strengths. I, I felt like I did. It's a very funny movie. And I just like giving you shit. That's my main thing, too. Okay. Point is, go see it.

You'll get a lot of laps. It's a lot funnier than pretty much, I guarantee, any other comedy you're going to see this year. And I feel like comedies are often, they often take a beating from the critics. And it's kind of difficult to read a critical review of a comedy and know for sure whether or not you'll actually enjoy it. Yeah. I'm saying this is not flawless.

It does not live up to the White House of American Summer standard, but it is really funny. So you should actually enjoy it. Yeah. I'm saying this is not flawless. It does not live up to the White Hot American Summer standard, but it is really funny. So you should go see it. And what's called, they came together. They came together. Jess, do you have something you want to write about? I do, actually. I saw a few weeks ago, I saw the movie Obvious Child

at a somewhat intimate screening. I know we're all talking about screenings and stuff. Oh, man. I'm not a viewer. I'm not a viewer. I'm not a viewer. talking about screenings and stuff. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Oh manblist owns boss. It is starring her. And Vichert Chalkward. Sure, sure, sure. It is starring her of the Slay Your Name in an audition.

And you can say that. No, but it was really amazing. Gabby Hoffman's in it, David Cross, Jake Lacey. It was directed. And I think written by, I'm confirmed. Yeah, it was directed and written by Gillian Roeb's Pierre and I don't know if I'm if it's Gillian or Gillian, I couldn't figure that out. But the movie said both. Yeah, either way I hope that on my basis. It's amazing, it's an amazing debut from someone so randomly involved in the French Revolution.

This is totally name-dropping, but apparently our mutual friend, Elliot. No, no, I'm me, I'm not your mutual friend. I even like me. Ursula Lawrence of the Writer's Guild was in the original short that this movie then was like based off of. Oh, interesting. Yeah, it just like. Yeah, it's a big name. It's a big name, right?

I have no idea. OK, great. No, well, here's the- Was she the master wrestler in the- Yeah. Sure. Just here's what I liked about it. It felt very kind of realistic to me,

and Jenny Slade is delightful and charming. Everything is kind of written really well and very naturalistic and it makes it watching it made me realize how much I watch so many things that's supposed to depict what it means to be kind of a young adult in a very glossed way. Like it was just so delightful and charming and it kind of did a really cool job of addressing abortion without making it seem like it was this, it was like the huge fucking big deal of the movie. It was, it was sort of more around this choice of a woman's right to choose in a very subtle and cool way. And I just, I thought it was

so delightful and charming and like it, everybody showed up and just acted the shit out of it. Kill where? Nice. Yeah. I want to see that shit out of it. Kill it. Nice. Yeah. I want to see that. Yeah, it was actually really fantastic. So a whole-hearted recommendation, partial recommendation. No, I'm an old-time email guy.

I'm kind of a real man for her. Speaking of old-time email, it's time for Elliott to recommend his stuff. Now Dan forwarded me an email from, I'm forgetting the name. I think his name was Josiah from a guy who said that I in my recommendations I had not been recommending any Edward G Robinson movies even though I've been doing lots of old-time movies So you know what I'll rectify that tonight. I recommend to ever G Robinson movies I'll click out of the Kaelin crib my two favorites which are surprisingly neither of them is he playing a gangster even That's what he kind of did best, I'd like to recommend I think my favorite

Energy Robinson movie and then no other time I favorite movie called the sea wolf based on the Jack London novel where Edward G. Robinson plays the captain wolf Larson of a ship of the damned if you will a bunch of people from San Francisco around the turn of the century are Kidnapped and forced to work in his ship and he believes wholeheartedly in John Milton's phrase better to rule and held in Serven heaven. And so he wants to be the master of this hell ship and he won't brook any dissent and it's a great portrait of a man who is basically evil but not without his sympathetic moments. And it's a really crackling suspense thriller-y type thing about people

trapped on a ship and they've got to escape. On the other side of the ledger, the Heath Ledger, of Energy Robinson playing a heroic character, there's five star final and early talkies from 1931 where Energy Robinson is the editor of a newspaper that in order to goose its sails decides to dig up an old murder trial from many years before and find the people who were in the lovers who that in order to goose its sails, decides to dig up an old murder trial from many years before and find the people who were, the lovers who were involved and ends up ruining a number of lives as a result of digging up this old case.

And Boris Karloff is in it and he's fantastic in a very funny role as a former seminary student who's now a really slimy reporter, Aileen McMahon, who's a crush of mine, is plays editor Robinson Secretary, who secretly has a crush on him. And it's one of these movies that's just like, a little slow at times, because it's 1931,

but is a really otherwise tight, you know, like hour and 15, hour and a half minute movie that has a lot of characters running around and doing 30 stuff and just be in dramatic and neat. So the sea wolf and five star final two, I think my favorite two, Edward G. Robinson movies. So that's five movies to watch before we meet up next time, okay? Everybody? Yeah, you got to get you ready. That is your homework. Meet up here at the exact same time in five weeks. And if we're not married, we're getting married. Yeah.

So I'd like to thank Jessica Williams for being here, even though I have a cat, and she's definitely allergic to that. She's dead now. She's sniffling more and more. The longer she's in my apartment, so she probably wrapped things up I think we should and so for the ending good night Chrissy and Patrick lying in bed listening to the flop house in Melbourne Do it do it with each other

Time to go to sleep time close your eyes and drift off to dream land. But before that, do it with each other. A loving couple curled up in a non-sexual way and going to sleep. Go down on each other. What? Chrissy and Patrick, good night. Good night. Fuck fest. So for the plot house, who are you?

I'm in Dan McCoy. I'm glad we ended up on a PG news. And I've been Elliot Kaelin. And no, you're not. You're Stuart Wellington. And this is Jessica Williams. Good night, everybody. Right.

Oh Oh my gosh, it scared me it does not cut through the fucking like We're not way that this Just I have an edgy. Are we just going to do just a little bit of supposed to. I say, I'm getting nice to see you. I never know if I'm going to like love you in a room. I love it. Thank you, thanks for coming. I don't care for it.

Wow, you have to. You look nice today, by the way. Have you been working out? Here in a little bit. I'm a classic steward.