The Flop House - The Flop House: Episode #47 - The Unborn

Episode Date: October 10, 2009

0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and SPOOKY theme0:35 - 2:27 - The usual off-topic nonsense up front.2:28 - 30:44- Finally, the pro-abortion, anti-holocaust, Jewish demon horror story you've been waiting for! The Unborn.30:45 - 34:04- Final judgments 34:05 - 39:29 - Movie Mailbag39:30 - 47:11 - A special SHOCKTOBER sad bastards recommend.  47:12 - 48:37 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

Hibik, Shmibik, pass'm Dan McCoy, I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Elliot Kaylin, don't you know. Alright. That's my Fargo impression. Oh, okay, so everyone. Far know? Yeah, like the movie. Oh right Where are you saying then? No, you know, I haven't seen you guys in a while. Yeah, right at least since yesterday So you yesterday. Yeah, I saw you guys at a street fair. Yeah, and Brooklyn Brooklyn, New York You said it the way the Dutch would have said it

300 400 years ago in your Brooklyn, New York. Do you have some tube stakes guys? I mean penises? Hot dogs that's uh oh see I would have called that a hot dog. I didn't have any. I did get I did get to see some antique buses. Yeah you were very excited about the antique buses. You sent a text saying that you were gonna be at court street and such and such a place and I was like, okay, we're walking to you and then we got to that place and we're like,

where's Elliot? And you sent it, I called you and you're like, oh, we got sidetracked by the antique buses. Yeah, they're awesome. I love that. I bet that story was a lot less boring when we were tabling. But I didn't get to have a tube steak either, although I was really hoping when I was there to get a tube steak with a corn condom on it.

You mean a corn dog. Yeah, but I didn't get one when I walked past the first place because I thought there's another one. That's a long story. I know Dan was searching for Sangria the entire time. And when we split up in one of our separate ways daniel i notice that there's a sangria stand steps away from where we had just been standing and where you just left it's uh... new dans

so dan McCoy's welcome oh no shit it was too late it was the opportunity it was a galom of sangria i had already had that prevented me from saying the other sangria ironic yeah ironic is what it is. Oh, okay. Oh, Henry himself, but not have done better. You know what, this month is, guys, what's that? Shocktober.

Huh. You mean that we're on channel 11 right now, WPIX New York's movie station? Yeah. And Stuart is a regional journalist. That's a regional journalist. What? What? What's up?

What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? No, it's sort of up in this region. Howling host. Stuart is wearing a low cut dress. Sure. It's very revealing. Very tight around the hips. And my hair, black wig. Yeah, my wig is all the way down to my bottom. Came up out of a coffin. Yep, I did actually.

I'm still kind of covered in webs. Well, Stuart, as our... Stubber bat on a string. As our haunted host. Would you like to introduce tonight's movie? Yeah, it was, wait, let me check the piece of paper. It was a spooky treat called the Unborn. Oh, wow.

That was pretty good. Glad you wrote it down. Yeah, yeah, it was really scary. I don't know if I can explain this movie. Uh, so you can. I think the movie was about, uh, like, uh, Jewish demon or something. Uh-huh. It started off being about a Jewish spirit, and then it became, near the end of the movie, they made a point to say, this isn't really a Jewish spirit. Yeah. Well, you got to open it up to all sectors, uh, if you want to have a blockbuster success well it's interesting because i've i came to the realization a long time ago that for

most harm movies that are demon related to work or even bigger ones like rosemary's baby or the extra sister the omen you have to for two hours you have to say okay for this to be scary i believe in the tenets of a certain kind of catholic catholic uh Catholic apocalypticism But like for the next two hours. I believe that the devil is real I believe that Christ is the Lord. I believe in hell and

I believe Roman Plansky didn't rape a small girl. No, you can still believe that and enjoy Rosemary's baby But I but it was nice to see a movie where Wait, what? It was it was nice to see a movie where I... what it was nice to see a movie where i'm sure you haven't read the newspapers this week i assume what what about the romaine plan skid what that is it happened thirty years ago wait we're talking about child right now i thought we're talking about

what's not let's talk about the let's get off of this terrible subject that i don't know where I was brought up. Okay, yeah, come on. Let's keep it together. Let's go back on to... I mentioned Rosemary's Baby. You have to bring up the worst possible aspect of it. Anyway, I was just saying it was nice to see a movie where I didn't have to... As a Jewish person who doesn't believe in Christianity and all sorts, didn't have to decide like, okay, I'm gonna buy into this faith

that I don't believe in for two hours to make the movie work for me. This movie didn't necessarily work for me, but the fact that it started off Jewish and then got to a point where they were like, this is just some kind of crazy demon. It probably predates religion. They said it was like, oh, okay,

I don't have to kind of fake a belief in hell for this thing to be scary. Yeah, I was just saying that and then Dan took it off into this Oh, that's what happened ridiculously Like I was hard to magazine over here and then just you're right off the right you're trying to figure out what you were gonna say next is our horror host Yeah, I was I was writing down like spooky lines and cross come out with a big magic marker Yeah, I'm on a cue card. I still don't have any, but maybe I'll get back to you guys. What we can talk about with the movie was about then. Okay, so yeah, you want me to summarize this one? I'm really good at it.

Let's see what you can do. Okay, the movie begins, right? Right. I'm 18 years. Okay, the movie begins, right? Right. What? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

No, Stuart's correct so far. The movie did be here. Okay, so imagine with that. Okay, guys, imagine this. Movie begins. This chick has this dream where there's like a crazy kid, right? And like a dog with a fucking mask on. That shit's fucking crazy.

And then she goes like, there's a story. I'm like, I'm a flashbacker. That shit's fucking crazy. And then she goes, like, when she's born it turns out that this was a dream. Like, at first she's like, oh, is she in like a magical world or something? She did up. Okay. So it turns out she's babysitting for this fucking crazy little kid who talks like that kid from the sixth sense,

like a grown up or something. And he smashes her face with a mirror. And he says, John B wants to be born. Yeah, John B. No, it's Jumbo. jump jump me. That's right. Yeah, you're thinking of John B from P. We's yeah, play house Jumpy wants to be born. So it's fucking really weird because he totally smashes There in the face with his mirror and like nothing happens. She doesn't even have a mark on her face

Okay, so move fast forward on She keeps having these fucking dreams that there's this fucking little kid in a mirror and it looks like the little dead kid from Like the little dead kid from any Dead-bone kid in it but with like an outfit on it does look like the kid in the devil's back Yeah, so she's like, were this kid's gonna come and kill her or something and then She's doing some scubi-doo shit and finds out that she used to like she had a twin that died in the womb and that her mom killed herself or something. Her mom went crazy. Yeah, when crazy and killed herself.

Her mom in a surprisingly it seemed Carl Gugino in a in a in a cameo, but no, it was Carl Gugino. It was Carl Gugino. Yeah, according to the internet. I you know, and so it gave Carl Gugino work, which means I like the movie to a certain extent already. Yeah. So she finds out that this old lady at this old folks homes or grandma and her grandma tells her this crazy story

that uh... about the holocaust i wasn't paying that much to hurt this old lady she know crazy story about the holocaust make it clear that steward is not holocaust and i that's it's crazy story about about a Holocaust of some kind whatever The this old lady who turns out is her grandmother says she was a child During the Holocaust she was twins and she had a twin brother and that the Nazis were obsessed with twins and discovering the medical

Secret genetic secrets of twins which is true to certain extent and that they were obsessed with creating blue eyes in brown-eyed kids which I don't know if it's true somehow in the crazy like Kate Bosworth uh... obsessed with creating a bit of a guess so uh... sorry i have a terrible thing about superman returns and how terrible it is uh... so they but somehow they use experiments that are part medical, part occult. And through that... Paul Cop.

Through that. Dan, you're a firecracker today. Through that they somehow bring into this plane of reality a dibbic, which is, or dibook, as they keep saying, which is a bodyless spirit. In Jewish mysticism it's I guess someone who dies they don't get into heaven so they wander the earth unable to interact with the physical realm and it's a very horrible punishment. In this the dibbic can possess body is possesses her brother's body after it dies from these

experiments comes back it she kills him or he dies in the camps or something like that. She has a daughter, the daughter has twins. One of the twins is going to be this, possessed by this dibbick because Jumby wants to be born, dies in the womb, and now this thing Jumby is angry at the family and wants revenge on everyone, so. Yeah, yeah, and that old deal about not being able

to interact with the physical world, that's crazy man because like that ghost is making her see all kinds of shit. She's flipping out. Well, it seems like at the end they're kind of disavowing that it's a duvac. Okay. Because yeah, there's magic all over the place, man. Yeah. So she enlisted the aid of Gary Oldman who's a rabbi again.

He's a rabbi. He's the least Jewish rabbi i think i've ever seen in a movie and it's like if they got mr. t to play a wrap and then like i think her friends start dying and stuff i'm trying to imagine that the uh... yamika on top of mr. t's it would be it would fit on top it would be kind of floating but it's a head because yeah would like to imagine

mhm and then they get Idris Elba who is an episcopal priest all it also plays basketball obsessed Idris Elba promise which means you were saying you think he's now been in as many flopphouse movies as Nicholas Cage I like to be all she was in a lot of them yeah she's been in a bunch Jessica Elba I think that no one has been in more than three i think that just out of the three i think the case of the three i think it is if this podcast was written by david goyer like the movie we watched

was tonight we would explain how the three is important uh... because it's relation to the three represent i just read in a book yet three represents the trinity and uh... boot is a mits also blah blah blah blah blah yeah i that's that's good writing and this is me me a dude watching a horror movie needs to find out why the number ten is important in a fucking like extraceous and ritual he's just when this other thing is the uh... gary omen says

ten is the number of such and such is in the such and such and the blah blah is the things all he has to say there's really no reason there has to be ten for this bullshit ceremony but all he has to say is you need ten people to you need ten men to make a minion that's up that's a Jewish prayer group you need ten men don't okay great and you need some extra bodies around when the demon shows up and starts totally a single more that's the real reason someone can get killed that's not our hero so they go back to the decrepit abandoned hospital that her mother died in because i guess it's just open to the public in the middle of the night this is a historical landmark

it looks like they have a place in seventy years but uh... well this exorcism ceremony one by one everybody's getting killed yet everybody's getting crossed out uh... and carry on and wakes up the demon by blowing this giant bedazzled showfire. It's so far but it's covered in red sequence. It is the great. It is the gayest most flamboyant showfire I've ever seen. The horn is enormous. Yeah. It looks like he got it off of like some sort of elk. Yeah. So

and then the demon shows up. I like big showfars. It waxes a couple dudes and then jumps into it herself as body and he runs around like he got the rage virus injected into his bloodstream and then he gets killed and then her boyfriend gets possessed and then somehow she manages to grab the perfect page that allows her to finish the ceremony from this from this book that she looks up explodes this book fucking explodes. She needs, earlier in the movie, I guess the old lady

tells her to get the book of shadows, or book of mirrors. Yeah, that's one of the shadows. The book of mirrors. Larwich too. And she goes to the library. Check it out. She goes to the book.

She gets the president's book of secrets. No, not the president's. It's a lot to see that book. No, she goes to the library. I'm going to have to become the president president i wish that was the plan of the movie national uh... national treasure to run for run for the white house but uh... she goes to the library she types into the regular card catalog computer book of mirrors

the entry comes up for this car keeper sub for this four hundred five hundred year old he had a break-to-home of cavalistic secrets. And they just lock on it and they let her take it to what look at in the reference room and she just picks it up and walks out with it. And it's ridiculous like that book should not be in the digitized catalog. And the weird thing is when she goes up to talk to Gary old. And he's like, we're in a lot of the place.

If you just let that circulate. Yeah. And Gary old man was even like, where did you get this? Like, she got at the fucking library. She didn't even try. Like, she didn't even have to pull in, like, I don't know, all of her credit or like street services. Well, they didn't even need to like,

use an intro library loan to get it from, you know, the Ushiva University library. I just, you know, I feel like the listener at home's heads is spinning thinking this must be the one. Because they're possessed by demon. So, you know, this is the most complex movie and I can just boil it down. Basically, there's a possessing spirit.

It's been bevelling this family for like three generations and now it's trying to possess the youngest female member of the family. Yes, because Jumbo wants to be born. Yeah, and Jumbo. No, Jumbo. Jumbo was a famous elephant. And the Holocaust is thrown in there just to make it more distasteful. Yeah, that was...

There were a lot of genuinely creepy images in this, and then they had to throw in the Holocaust and it makes everything... It makes you angry at them, forget it. Yeah. To remind you of something that's genuinely horrible, as opposed to just crappy and taudry on the other hand uh Gary Oldman is in a Yamaka so it was great which is don't oh no saves the movie certainly there's there's a great scene where there's a great

scene where he shouts at a dog with an upside down head I like that what does he say it is he say like he's like don't pause the furnaces get out of here. It's like good out of here and when they're in this like really weird Was that like a theater look like an abandoned theater space in his life? It would like with like paper flying all over the place. Yeah, this movie was big on winds blowing paper around Yeah, but there were some neat. There were some genuinely neat images. There's some cool effects like weird mouth effects. Well, we'll get to the final judgment later. Yeah, there's a lot of surprise shots of a ghost kid with a giant mouth clawing at people.

It got to a point where like, there were so many surprise shots of this ghost kid attacking the main hero, heroin, that you got to the point where you're like, she must be used to it by now. Certainly she just takes it and stride that this ghost kid is appearing. She was getting pissed off.

And the thing is like this ghost kid shows up and just totally starts smoking people. Like he's like, oh, you're flying around. I'm killing you. Oh, now you fold in half. Like he's super magic. Yeah. Why the fuck did he like beat around the bush this long?

Well, that's one of the things about this. Problems. The ghost movie. Yeah, the ghosts don't make themselves clear. Yeah. And why if he has these powers, doesn't he go straight for the person he wants to kill as opposed to everyone else? Yeah, why does he wait? I mean, is it like a humorous or something? He says allow us to have one of the greatest car crashes or one of the greatest car hits I've ever seen in a movie. Her best friend, Romi, is driving around just bopping to music and suddenly I know there. Has it played at a very sensible volume?

Yes. She's not distracted at all. She's driving very well and slowly on a deserted suburban street. A certain 10, 2, gently nodding our heads in the music. Sure. This is the kid who hit the main character in the face with the mirror earlier has become kind of the dibbix main go-to body to possess.

Because if you're going to possess a body, why not a small child with the strength of a small child? It really doesn't make sense why he would go for such an unthreatening figure. Yeah, she's driving and he is on his big wheel trike and out of nowhere just zooms in in front of the car. Even in front of the car, he's like riding on the like the heel, like the side of the road. He seems to be coming at the car almost at a side angle, like perpendicular to the road.

And she'll, like, the shot from the windshield makes it look like she's driving right off the road. Yeah. And she, and he is hitting such a way that he flips up over the back of the car. And when she goes around, he's just standing up, fine, no problem. And says something threatening to her. But it just so, it comes out of nowhere

and looks so silly that it was great. You would, you'd probably go under the car. I mean, he's not, he's not. He doesn't have a very large profile. No, he would be crushed by the car. Sure. There's no way that he's tall enough that the part of the body that needs to be hit from to flip in the air is getting hit. I mean, it's funny that he flipped it over the car.

No, it made it better, certainly. But the way that he comes in on the track, it seems very clear to me that he's a computer effect that was kind of added in. So it almost looks like they shot this footage of Romy driving around and they're like, we better scare up this footage. Oh, well, we'll just insert the kid, you know, driving into the car. Good stuff. And funny enough, spoiler alert guys, it's that little kid,

and it's stabbing Romy to death with a knife later on. Yeah. And Michelle had to live her days out alone. Yeah, no one to go to the high school reunion with. It's very sad. Everybody lives in really big, nice houses in this movie. Yeah, they live in a... Some of them live in castles.

There's a lot of castles houses. Like a police station estate. I think they're all erasers. It's possible. Well, there's not scary. There's a lot of sort of vagueness in this movie like I was never clear On how old our heroin was supposed to be because she comes on with the beginning of the movie Baby sitting then having an adventure in that yeah and

Saying hide or dad before she goes to bed and then in the next few scenes She's going to what appears to be a college class and then like having sex with her boyfriend In her room and just like not even like hiding that at all The dad is not a good dad the dad seems to disappear for most of the day And they don't really have sex you just see your like lying on his naked chest They should have just had hand jobs or something but I guess that sex. Yeah, it's implied that they are just They just they just kind just shared some hand jobs. They have the menu.

Yeah, so look at the menu. I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say,

I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say,

I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, intimate contact but like i'm just trying to clarify so the viewers not like oh wait there's a sex scene in this maybe i'll watch there is not there's not there's but there was a lot of the application of a sexing let me tell you that you know we are all human men we are three what human male as far as you know healthy human males sure uh... varying degrees of health we have to admit that one thing that drew us to this movie above all other um... shock tober options was the fact that the poster for this film

unabashedly featured the lead female backside in very trim cotton panties as she looked into the mirror and like there was the horrible kid looking jumbo or whatever. Jumbo is a famous elephant. And I was saying, you know, ahead of time, like, oh, you know, this is just a come on, you know, like that scene where we take the film. Yeah, they're not going to have a scene in the movie where the heroin is in their panties. But it's it's right there. It's like five.

There's like five of them. The woman just keeps going back into the bathroom. It's like a hostile translation. Yeah. when she is by herself the pants go off And she stares into her bathroom air of that but yeah, and then this is gonna sound Crass of me they obviously did some retouching on her on said backside in the poster yeah it's noticeably a bit easier yeah you're very openly disappointed about her back side in the film yeah i kicked over a table you know as disappointed surely Elliott uh... i hold you back well they promise surely there would never be a

horror movie poster that promises more than the film delivers i'm just saying the poster promise to certain amount of shapeliness you've got carl gogino in the film right she could very easily all know your love start back side for the main character all right well well maybe Ellie can't lose the unborn you can make it the way you want to make it all I only I think the unborn would be a very different movie but here about yeah well for one thing a whole lot more Jewish stuff yeah everyone in the movies Jewish it takes place during filler on the roof

times so it's in the shuttle in Russia sure pale of settlement and It's the same basic plot otherwise just and they break out into song every couple of minutes Same actors though, right no different actors topol Let's see who else The rest of the cast of filler on the roof a filler on the roof uh that's the best you can do uh

who would play the Jewish actors? jumpy i think i get wala shon probably how much better would the movie benefit was wala shon saying jumpy wants to be born yeah like that

speaking of john this is a is mechalekahai mechalhainio Hebrew? I don't believe so. OK. I don't believe so. There's not a lot of Hebrew genies. No, they tend to be Arab. I'm flicking. But they, what's, what she looks into a lot of mirrors in this,

she's always looking into things she shouldn't. And there's a scene where she's in the bathroom of the club she went to, and as to her point that she is she is looking in a mirror again. She knows mirrors are scary. She looks at another one. It scares her. She's throwing up at a fright. And there's a very clearly a glory hole in the world. And she starts moving towards it very slowly. Putting her eye up to the glory. And you know something scary is going to come out of it. In this case, it's a whole lot of bugs and like kids.

Yeah, but she's not even like, goes to the opposite side of the fucking thing and you close it. In this case, scenario, it's going to be a penis coming out of her eye. It's like she slides her fucking head along the same wall and like gets as close as possible. And I thought it was refreshing to see a horror film

that uses a glory hole for whatever reason. It took me back to my days of using any of the public bathrooms at the NYU campus and realizing that people had made those holes into the dividers. Wow. On a non-glorial related note. If there's a... I didn't want to correct what you said was that you said

that she started vomiting because she was sick She was actually vomiting because she's pregnant with twins. Oh, that's I would be fine that later. I'd be jumbo Junior that's the secret The best hot dog grand in town jumbo junior hot dogs That that's the secret surprise shock ending at the end which is told in super flash cut Scenes is that she's pregnant with twins blah blah blah one of them's probably jumpy and you're supposed to the audience member feel stupid for not having seen all the signs rather than like me and not caring. Well what were the other signs? She had sex. Yeah sure. That's how it works. That's true.

Um, she is still eating pickles and ice cream together. The image of those fetuses that they're showing are very well developed Like she should know it's they're saying like you're pregnant with twins and the image they already have One of them wins or something right? I don't think they would have been great if it did But they already have fingers and faces like she's really far along. Yeah, like possibly like the with fetus turns and winks and it cuts immediately to like like a heavy metal like like screen. You gotta have like a like a like a like a Sammy Hague our screen. And then the credits there are graphics on born flashes. They're graphics like while the credit rolling in the

middle maybe on the sides there are animated graphics of the evil fetus like appearing and looking around, and then running off to the side of the screen, and then showing up with the guitar. Tuxedo or something? We're gonna take Cedo and holding a cigar. And Converse shoes. Sure, dancing and all the details.

Tails, yeah, of course. Yeah, like a barren-samete style. So wait, she's given birth to the new year. Is that what's going on? Kind of, yeah. But he's also a skeleton face. Yeah, like barren-samety. Yeah.

So basically, the unborn is about unborn babies. It's a pro-abortion. I went into abortion. It is a very seriously. I assumed it was about an aborted baby that wanted to live and was coming back for revenge. It is not. It is saying you should abort your children because they will be evil. Yeah, get rid of them shits. Yeah. Because they never know. They might be a diva. There is a diva inside you, which is not how diva works, but it's still could be the only other child in this film is a fucking like a little demon vessel like all kids no way

no way no yeah and anti-kids movie yeah unlike the movie kids which is pro kids yeah pro kids it's pro kids yeah it's pro kids sneakers sure it's pro uh ruse those those sneakers that had uh pockets in them. Oh sure big enough to put like a penny Don't have a lot to carry around with them sure now nowadays all those Where those heelies with the wheels? I wish I had those as a kid. I would have hurt myself so bad on those They would have been awesome. I dream of children hurting themselves while wearing those actually They're not they're not like sexual dreams and they're just you know now that any every every for what's every dream has a sexual element

interesting yeah uh... uh... you should be we talk about that more or well segment for a good uh... was one of the great minds of the late nineteen the early twenty oh the guy he was in bill and tensed it was in that yes and also the seven percent solution sure where he treats straw com Holmes in those boring way possible. Hey.

That's a boring movie. That's a boring movie. It's a good book, though. I've never had the book. I'm sure it's good. I think Kelsey Grammer would make a good segment for a way to complete. If there was a sitcom about Freud.

Yeah. It was called, like, on the couch. Dude, let's write that sitcom. There's a tank that's going to be canceled. Canceled? I mean, he's going to be free. I bet. Yeah. Michails Navy 2 is not starting filming for a year. That was up Periscope. Yeah, down Periscope. Michails Navy started a totally Tom Arnold,

Tom Arnold, Bruce Campbell and Tim Curry. Come on. What your bad naval films. Come on. Then don't even get mixed up with Sergeant Bilko. That was Steve Martin playing Phil Silvers. Phil Hartman, the late Phil Hartman and one of his final rules. Wait Phil Hartman done. I guess they're reading these celebrity newspapers. Yeah, I mean that about 12 years ago. These celebrity newspapers that all the celebrities. This celebrity newspaper is called newspapers. Everybody newspapers called newspapers. First Rome of Balansky, now Phil Harman was...

You are way behind. What was the last celebrity news story you heard? How up to date are you? Was it about Tyrone Power? Didn't one of the members of TLC burn down Andre Risen's house? Well that was about 10 years ago. I think time's out of joint like uh... like a nicklaus sparks not you're like billy pilgrim yeah

unstuck in time yeah you're living all of the worst celebrity scandals all at once that sounds like me so uh... you go from reading about roman planskeet who talking to fattie our buckles to watching john w looks book kill the president well what i don't know that's the he was a celebrity

that's right is that i was saying that it wasn't skinless it was not a scantle it was not a controversial move to shoot the president ahead dan in a strangely pro link in assassination stance i just don't think that i was a couple of people don't even know you public opinion is the point. Don't even know you anymore. He keeps talking about right.

The death of the president. You better believe John Moxbooth agent was on the phone with him saying, you've ruined your career. We gotta do some serious damage control, Ben. Yeah, his name was mud. Eh? Eh?

Eh? Mud was a different person who deserved what he got. Okay, so thanks for taking me through the history, folks, guys. Yep. It was a kaleidoscopic version of American history. Yep. So back to the business of hand, you know what I mean?

Yep. We're talking about the unborn. And I think it might be time for final judgments. Unless we want to talk about glory holes and demons more. Well, no, I don't think so. OK, so final we did not talk too much about the demon scenes which were pretty cool Which would like with the scary face effects? Yeah, scary faces and bugs everywhere Yeah, I mean they use that like that that that editing style with the Gittery yell jittery and flashy and there's like dudes whose heads turn upside down

Like it was better than than normal in the movies we've seen i mean wait like compared to what like compared to what at the end yeah basically well yeah that's fair but i didn't make it good but mirrors are that great twist ending so that made everything okay what you know what

in a mirror you know where he ends up stuck in the mirror world wait what movie was this? this is in Mirrors. What, it's Keepers Sutherland. Keepers Sutherland. How much wait in that movie? That I didn't know.

Yes. And he ends up in a mirror world. He stuck in the mirror. What are you talking about? It's the twist ending. Get out of here. That didn't happen. And that was a Flop House classic redux.

Hey, okay. We're back. So final judgments. Is that what? Yeah, so we're back So final judgments that we'll do it final judgment so Special Shocktober categories for final judgment that we will forget instantly you're outdoing me again Was this yeah, why do you the horror host? Terrible this job was this movie totally Scarefying Frighteningly funny or totally snoreifying.

Stupid. A lot of work into this. Yeah, I'm going to go, you know what? I think I'm going to go frighteningly funny. It was, you know, it was shitty, but there was, you know, there was some white cotton panties and upside down head demons and kids on... Sure. Yeah, kids get run over by cars Yeah, no, there's there's some laughs to be had so yeah, the unborn. Give it a watch, huh?

Yeah, I you know if I was gonna be charitable I'd say Frighteningly funny. I mean it is a trim 88 minutes shorter than the movie 88 minutes. Yeah by like 80 minutes But there was also a lot of stuff that just I don't know there's like just a lot of slow parts and I was saying during the movie eighty eight minutes yeah by like eighty minutes but there's also a lot of stuff that just i don't know there's like just a lot of slow parts and i was saying during the movie that i hate uh... the trend in modern horror movies to have it be a mystery as well like

a much a scary stuff happens and then our hero or harrowin has to track down while the scary stuff is happening by piecing together the events of the past. Like, I would rather there be a situation given and our hero have to deal with that, than to try and add some sort of mysterious obducation. I don't know, I'm saying that word correctly. Sure, I'm trying to.

It pronounced obfuscate on. I say, you know, try and spice it up. I think it's enough that like, horrible things are happening without the mystery element. Well, you're an old-school, a guy. Yeah. But yeah, I think it's a little snorrifying. But there are some frighteningly funny parts. I am gonna go with Stuart on this one and say frighteningly funny.

Again, it was very short. I actually enjoyed some of the scare scenes, although they were kind of by the numbers the rest of it is very bad But there was some funny parts and it's short like I said there's a little kid getting hit by a car, Dan All right, you're gonna see is very funny frighteningly so The decisions been maybe it was been handed down by the gods. Maybe it's just that the last couple of movies we've seen have been so bad. This one was a breath of crap air. Sure.

Well, I guess you have handed down the law. Yeah, but for a while. Yeah, they show not kill ape. If you. Oh, you mean real law. Yeah. Like the Ten Commandments. So they meant like, ape law.

They show not kill ape. Show ape kill human. I thought about it. Don't late. I thought about going to a law school to say the a lot for a lot of switch of a call for it as it was. No, I do mostly with a family law. You know, a state

planning things like that. I was a custody suits. Ape immigration law. Ape immigration law? Ape intellectual property theft. Wow. Ape intellectual property theft. That was Bobo Stick.

You stole it Coco. I don't know what I mean. This is a surprisingly fertile vein. Anyway, you're saying? I have in my hand a letter. That's really. Surprisingly, uh, fertile vein. Anyway, you're saying. I have in my hand a letter. That's really. That's letters.

It's, uh, it's from Colin last name with held and the subject family is huge subject head. His name with held here comes Peter flopping tail. And he says he says, I am an Igerian prince. And he says he says I am an Ijerian Prince I wish you could see Stuart's face when I read the subject heading But he says you ever seen Edvard once the scream That's pretty much it wait the movie the screen no not it's not a movie Oh, right that painting the painting or inflatable thing that you see in dorms But this gentleman says column last name with all he says

hello fellows I continue to love the podcast and eagerly await each new episode but I think you but I think you've been remiss for the last two years of flop history what you've not had a gimmick episode everyone remembers the must see tv night where all the new york based shows except sidefeld were an electrical blackout. Why not, then? The Seinfeld is in LA, New York. Yeah. Why not then, in episode while the Flapphouse crew take on each other's personalities?

Or in episode where your respective Flapphouse significant others portray Dan Stewart and Elliott? Or in episode of the Flapphouse 2020? No? Okay, well, I've been meaning to provide you guys with the link on my somewhat popular movie monologue site. You can view it here at, and he gives the address, which I will post on the blog. Perhaps it will prove helpful in getting the word out in regard to the flop house. Now, I don't know whether this is a contest entry for the flop of floppers. Promote us. To lack of entries, it might be drafted as one.

Yeah, but it was nice of him to post our link and he says some kind words on his website. Yeah, it's very nice. I think about these gimmick episode ideas though. Yeah, I like future us. Yeah, flop has 2020 sounds pretty cool. Wait, yeah. I could not a couple of years from now.

Oh, or is it that one of us is Hugh Downs and one of us is Barbara Walters? Oh, I like that. And what I'm talking about story like stories, you wouldn't see in the mainstream in the nightly news but that you should know about. Yeah, I think that sounds pretty good. I couldn't think of something that our significant others

would be less interested in doing a bad movie just thinking the same thing. They probably get bored. Yeah. They would be... They'd probably hit board. Yeah. They would be- They'd talk about lady stuff. Yep.

They'd probably do my dirty dancing or something. Sure. Like a cute boy they saw one time or- That's what girls talk about. Yeah, we're like new like that bump it thing in the song. He was wearing a white dress. He was carrying a white parasol. Exactly.

I didn't see him for a minute. He didn't see me at all. But I bet a month hasn't gone by since. I haven't thought of that boy. That's right. That's what women are like. They're like Bernstein. They're just like Everett Sloan instead of Cain.

What was the other one? It was 2020. Second and then it only take each other's personality. Yeah, I think that would just devolve into insulting each other. Probably. I'd be like, Stuart, I'm like, hey, dude. I've got a big penis Ellie would be like I'm there stay on topic. I don't know like it would just we get angry at each other probably

Fuck you Dan Although I do I it does make me wish that we could start an episode saying Listeners note before this episode Dan stored Ellie accidentally touched a magic skull and their personalities were transferred. They all beat up a gypsy woman before this podcast. Now they're getting transferred from their brains and to each other's brains it was really weird dudes. Then everything got cured. Now to the vlog. It was kind of like how I wanted that show. You know that show Life On Mars that they read it over here in the old United States in the colonies. I always kind of I was always hoping that like the opening like bit of that like you know

the open credits would show like have a song and have him like and then he's all the gypsy and she told me that I'm into the past. I just I just want to be way better because then it would summarize everything and be more interesting. I just wanted the last episode him to wake up and be, it was all a dream on Mars. It turns out he's actually an astronaut on Mars. Dude, that was totally the ending to the US version. I didn't watch it, but I heard all these people complaining online about how crazy the

ending to the US version of life on Mars was. And the ending was, you know, he wakes up. He's been in a suspect- boiler to the show nobody watched and that's why it's off the air. he's been in suspended animation as an astronaut and he got to choose seriously a vivid dream to keep his mind occupied while he's in suspended animation and so he chose to be a cop and that's great that is such a stupid like terribly unsatisfying great ending that's like the end of open your eyes like that's really like really dumb well you'll check it out on

YouTube there were no hints for this but your brain is alive in a jar somewhere you know that sounds great he was an astronaut because you know the network executives were like well well when does Mars come into it? Yeah, I don't understand. He's never going into outer space David boy That's what they said. That's exactly what they said So that sounds great. I'm glad I brought up live on Mars. So any who? Oh, this is the part of the show, you're like, am I for directions? Well, horror host, maybe you should host something.

Okay, okay, boils and ghouls. I hope you're ready for some scary movie recommendations as it is shocked tober, so we're going to recommend some movies we actually like and may or may not have seen recently, starting with Elliot. MMMMMMM me? Yes, it will. It's a scary movie like. and may or may not have seen recently. Starting with Elliot. Mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-me? Yes, Elliot. It was a scary movie you liked. I'm gonna mention two movies.

Are they both scary? One is and one is not. Start with the scary one. Uh. Wow, he's really tight, you get troll. Now that we have you on him and I'm not making it out. I love your horror host, scared to win from Elvira to Saw, to Jigsaw.

Like, do it. Hey boys and ghouls, you've got a decision to make. Let's play a little game, Elliot. Tell me two movies. What of them better be scary? The thing, I haven't seen any scary movies recently that I really loved. And I'm trying to think of one that i haven't recommended in the past uh... i want to recommend that like i would once i want to recommend i think i've recommended

before like persona or in the mouth of madness or those are my favorite what about ghost but scary movies those but there's not a scary movie but i will mention that it is a kid it was really it is the twenty-fifth anniversary of ghost butters and i've been celebrating it all year so uh... but the movie i want so there's much scary movies out there you can go

see them okay persona scariest movie i ever saw in the madness my favorite joker movie personally but recently a song we called his kind of woman starting rubber mitchum and jane russle and uh... vinson price and it is a movie that starts out as a film noir and then becomes kind of a tongue and cheek film noir and then by the end is just out and out comedy with some surprisingly violent scenes. It's one of the few it's from 1951 I think but

there's a scene where a guy gets shot in the chest and blood drips out of his chest and it's just like but it was one of the more graphic scenes I've seen in all movie but it's a lot of fun. Robert Mitchem's in it. And Vincent Price has one of, I think, his best roles ever as a ham actor named Mark Cartigan, who is in this resort that Robert Mitchem has been sent to by a famous crime lord and basically decides to become a hero in it. And they're these great scenes of Vincent Price like giving speeches to the other characters and Basically hamming it up and being really but his performance becomes very affecting so I recommend it a lot Daniel I'm having a hard time coming with a good horror movie, but I did see fairly recently

uh... but i did see fairly recently um... movie splinter about like about the ninja turtles mentor now about like biopic biopics are scary about because they're true now it's about like a weird uh... sort of uh... virus like most uh... movies are most horror movies are these days seems like but like more of a kind of this strange fungus that creates splinters on people that can shoot out and sort of infect them and they become all pointy and weird porcupine.

They should have called it the pointy people. It's pretty gross. Have you seen it, Snort? Splinter. Yeah, it was pretty gross. It was kind of cool. It's a pretty good, like, basically three people stuck in a enclosed space horror movie survival horror they're all in a gas station silo oh gas station maternity war store

and they have to fend off these people and figure out how to get out of there but um what i'm going to also recommend is on Netflix watch instantly, I noticed that the movie I'll believe you, aka First Time Caller, is available on Watch Instantly. And this is a film that, along with roles by Patrick Warburdenton fred willard at helms and chris elliott it also has some former flop house co-hosts in it uh... is like a small glittering stars yeah is a small independent comedy

it's out on the shelf for a few years then it got a very small like release an out on dvd but uh... one rich duncan uh... the co-writer of the Werewolf book and often frequent co-host plays Craig the engineer and Amanda Melson and Bob Powers both play radio collars. Oh wow. It's not a great comedy, you know,

it has the problem that a lot of like small comedies have which it kind of drags a little, like they don't have, I mean, I feel like you can make a great movie obviously as an independent filmmaker, but nope, keeping up the energy sometimes on like a low budget film is harder without like the resources really like make it snap. And so there's like some dragy parts in the middle,

but there's some really funny stuff in it too. And if you're ever curious to see what Rich Duncan looked like with more hair than he has now, you can watch first time call her. I gotta see that. I'm never saying no. I'll believe you. I gotta check that out. I like those people.

Yeah, I don't actually have a good horror movie to recommend. You were the one who wanted the scary movies. Well, I know. I do. I'll talk about a scary movie. I, yeah yeah this time of year always makes me go even more out of my way to watch shitty horror movies and this week was no different. I rewatched Edward Furlong's masterpiece because he's in it.

Brain Scan, where he plays a dude with who gets sucked into a video game that turns them into a killer, and it's very clearly an attempt to create a new franchise with this like weird to-do-do character who like kind of haunts them and helps possess them and stuff. Similar to Wes Craven's Shocker, which was not what I was expecting. Well, like the lawnmower, man. Similar to the lawnmower, man, but not based on. Or Deesnider strange i like to think that uh... any for longs ancestors revikings and they killed some sort of a haired serpent and uh... so he was like a Bjorn killer of the long fur and that over time became for long sure could just be could just be the measure of the

the elaborate uh... fantasy as to the derivation of Eddie for a long time. I had a listen. I saw it teaching a lot when I was a kid. Yeah, did I read that story on your blog you write about Eddie for a long time? Yeah, yeah, yeah, for longs and for longs. Yeah, where you have some slash thick about the various characters he's been. Yeah, well, there's a little bit about him and the guy who was on Slut Your Shorts, who

was also in Terminator 2, little bit about him and the guy who was on Slut your shorts who was also in Terminator 2. Yeah. A little bit about him and Arnold Schwarzenegger, a little bit about him and Robert Patrick. Sure. Kind of teaching him what it's like to be human. Exactly. Yeah. Well, there's a lot of two. I have no emotions. Well, let me try, let's try this then. Yeah. There's a lot of subtext on those movies that you can really drive into. That thumbs up at the end. I know. There's a lot of pecker fan fiction on there. What happened to the character after the film was over, you know? Sure. A lot of uh, Baltimore's like body.

What was that like? Eddie Crow for was it? Crow. I don't remember which one. The Crow for. But a lot of Eddie for a long John Waters slash and secondary to. Yes. Yeah. One of my favorite favorite movies of all time. So what and what else do you say besides brain scan?

Uh, yeah, I can't, I can't think anything else. So I saw brain scan this week. I saw, I watched a bunch of, I watched, uh, you know, I watched head of the family again. That was great. Do you own that? No, I don't know. Not yet.

Not until they come out with a blue ray edition. All right, guys, now you're just chatting. Not every, not every movie gets a blue ray edition. Alright guys, now you're just chatting. Not every movie gets a blue ray edition, apparently only screw balls get one. Yep, screw balls. Hey guys, so what now what do we do, Dan? Now we sign off. No, cool.

Why don't you do it, Stewart? Why don't you kick us off since you're our... Okay guys, well host. For the flop house, I've been steward Wellington. Give yourself like a like boor twilling to Boor smelly town I have been Sandman come back to me later

Okay, okay, that's not that good, but that's cool. Helly it killin. Oh, that's what he's been doing this whole time I've been thinking about that. Yeah, okay. That's why I've been so lackluster this episode. Good night folks. You should be glad it wasn't chowderfest. Chowder all is beard. Chowderfest. That sounds delicious. I don't care for chowder. By the way, chowderfest is coming up. Guys, what are your plans for chowderfest? Check chowderfest. Check chowderfest. Too many chowder heads. Delicious chowder. Miscatonic. Miscatonic.

Miscatonic University. Atonic University. I got my undergraduate there in our garden. Yep. In L.A. Care. In Fee-Lide masturbation. All right. And that's over.

Don't know why that went there. Don't worry, that'll just be at the end after going away music. Alright, that'll be our stinger. That's what it's called. That's what I used to call it on Mystery Science Theatre, I think.