The Flop House - The Flop House: Episode #60 - All About Steve

Episode Date: May 20, 2010

0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme0:35 - 2:30 - We reintroduce special guest host Brock Mahan.2:31 - 36:53 - We put on our critics' high-heeled red leather books to take on the no-rom, no-com, rom-com All About Steve40:56 - 40:55 - Final judgments40:56 - 44:07 - An all-comments Flop House mailbag.48:45 - 55:07- The sad bastards recommend.55:08 - 57:53 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

In this episode we learn all about Steve. But really, can anyone learn all about Steve? Hey everyone and welcome to the flop house, I'm Dan McCoy, I'm Stuart Wellington, I'm Brock Mayhant. Yeah that's right, Elliot it is gone he didn't die enough about it he had a block story well no it's uh... it's for saying alley it is out in california he's sure he's for he's laying the groundwork

for his wedding and what a groundwork he's like he's like john the baptist for his own wedding he's pairing uh... that's how prolific he is is that he he not only has the savior of his wedding, he's also the the hype man for it. Yeah, he's like, he's like, my wedding to that 2010 bitches. That's what hype man does. That sounds a lot like. Yeah, if John the Baptist came back today, that's exactly what he would sound like. But Brock, why don't you tell us a little bit about

yourself. Stuart was asking you beforehand, and I said, save it for the podcast. Well, I mean, we've done one of these before, and I don't remember all the stuff about Brock, and I want to build, you know, I really, all about Brock. Yeah, I want to be all about Brock tonight. Well, I'm a TV writer. I wrote for a show on a true TV called The Smoking Gun Presents

The World's Dumbest. I'm also one of the editors of a publication that Dan McCoy is a frequent and prolific contributor to called Wim Quarterly. If she's available. Yes, at Wim Quarterly.com. And at one store in Brooklyn, if you make your way to Deser Island comics in Williamsburg. There's exactly one copy left. Really? Yeah. Well, that's good to hear.

You should run don't walk. Yeah. To that store. Yeah, it's only one copy. If one of the listeners gets that one remaining copy, we should probably give them some sort of prize. Absolutely. Send us an email at the folks at www.wimcordelie.com.

And yeah, we'll figure out something from the archives to send you. Yeah. Yeah, Brock was with us once before for Paul Blart Mall Cop. And when we asked him to come again, he said, all right, but I want something, I want a really bad movie this time. And I'm very pleased that you kept up your end of the deal Yeah, no, we spoiler alert in spades We came up with a the razzi award winning all about Steve spoiler alert

Wait, it's a spoiler for the podcast the fact that we watch all about Steve. Guess what we're talking about a movie Yeah, we have what we haven't gotten to the big one I think the movie we're gonna want you. I mean, there will probably be in the title of the podcast. Oh, yeah, and you put them like movie poster. Yeah, I usually put all the information on the website. It's a movie poster for this one look like. I assume Sandra Bullock figures in it prominently. Okay. Maybe some red boots. Mm-hmm. Ah, yeah. Is it, do you put like a link to the movie trailer or do I have to go to IMDB for I put a link to the Wikipedia synopsis Okay on the on the page because sometimes I feel like We are miss in giving enough synopsis information for people to follow along

So I just feel like if people really want to know what's going on They can go to Wikipedia beforehand and then they can understand what we're saying about the movie. I mean, like, you know, I want to address this, our mutual friend Brad Stewart. He's no friend of mine. He criticized us about sometimes getting off the topic of the movies. What? And there's a lot of digressions in the flop house. What? And I think that the thing is, like like to me, the flop house has always been a comedy show. Wait a minute. That's about movie. I think

Brad thinks it's a movie show about that that's got some comedy in it. Wait a minute and your cat is climbing into a box right now. That's adorable. Okay, I'm like, that's so illustrated. It's a sort of digression that I'm sure Brad is talking about. I mean, if this was a video podcast and we could show the cat going into the box, I think

that everyone would agree. Okay, let me describe it. It's hilarious and wait the cats now smelling the table. Which believe me, is more adorable than going into the box. Yeah, that's totally. Well, not only that, but it's by spending 12 minutes up top, describing something about the cat that you can't see. We watched all about Steve.

Okay, Stuart. The comedy, romcom, right? In the absence of Elliot, would you like to take lead on synopsizing this movie? Well, I was going to make Brock do it because he's our guest. Oh, holy shit. And because I don't pay like a hazing for these movies. Yeah. All right, I'll give it a shot. Well, for starters, I learned much less about Steve Wozniak than I thought it was going to,

which was disappointing. But, all right, well, I guess it's the story of a crossword puzzle editor, a cryptverbalist, I believe. Someone who writes crosswords. And she's very good at her job. She's very good at cranking out crossword puzzles, but somehow can't get that same order into her personal life. She lives with her parents.

She has had little success. Her parents, Howard Hesman and the lady who was in charge of sparkle motion. Yeah, I dark. Oh, that was the guy from that was the guy from From heavy class right well, I also WK RP instance and Adi Dr. Johnny fever, but he was in head of the class He was he was the not he was the non-billy commonly guy just as Francis Ford cobalt was the director of Jack All right, so this yeah this, this cryptoverbalist, this crossword puzzle editor, lives at home with her parents, is striking out when it comes to finding physical companionship

of the opposite sex. So her parents decide to set her up on a blind date with the two. Is it ever established by the way, how they know Steve. No, it isn't at all. OK. Yeah. I assume they seem like cool people. That might be just one of their young friends

that they like to make. Yeah. I mean, Howard Hesseman's involved. Maybe he's like Steve's dealer. It's possible. Sure. Anyway. He's a dealer of what?

A lot of these curious. I was thinking marijuana, but it could be rare books. Sure. Why not? He does have a strikeling, how it has been in this film has a strikeling resemblance to Alan Ginsberg. So it could be, you know, that seems like something he would deal in. Yeah. Rare first volumes, leather bound volumes.

This Steve character seems like he would partake in those. Yeah. He seems like a reader. Yeah, I remember he's a real Renaissance man. That's what I think of when I think of Bradley Cooper. I think chiseled abs and pecs. I think ridiculous, gelled hair. Okay, I think of perfectly manicured chest hair. Mm-hmm.

Come on, Dan. Can you keep it up? Think of go near red hot American summer. Okay, so continue breath. Okay, so So yes Bradley Cooper aka Steve They go out on their blind date He meets meet Sandra Bullock's character at her parents' house, and she is immediately smitten so much so that she has to go upstairs to her bedroom and redo her entire wardrobe. Yeah, to make it more hookery.

Yes, I think that's the only way to describe it. Although weirdly enough, she does have a believe in her not. She has a few character quirks. One, one, two. Surely not. I know, it's shocked me too, but one of them is that she wears I Guess like me high red leather boots all the time So she's clearly because they make her

Ten toes feel like they're what was like like ten friends on a camping trip together So the spoiler alert that that's why that's why she wears those boots the spoiler alert. That's why she wears those boots. That mystery is all told. You'll be wondering all through the movie, why does she wear those boots? And then at the end, there's a mile log that explains why she wears those boots. I thought it was because she worked part time for a foot fetish website. It's possible. I don't think that writing crosswords is a very lucrative profession.

So she needs to put work part time as a foot fetish model. Sure. And being a crossword puzzle editor, she probably knows the exact term used to describe a foot model fetishist. And by the way, crossword puzzle writer, bullshit quirky job for a bullshit quirky romcom. Anyway, carry on. Okay, so she goes up. She changes her outfit. Steve decides, you know, okay, let's go to a restaurant they get into their Jeep and and Sandra just cannot contain herself like a dog and heat just bounces on this this poor Steve you know

malls is faced with with kisses. Yeah, it's a cougar. I Don't think that this movie wants us to think that she is a cougar, but Looking here in this movie she seems like a cougar, but looking her in this movie She seems like a cougar. Yeah, I mean how old was she in demolition? I don't know. I mean she's she's not on the spring of her years anymore She's still in the track of lady, but they do not make her look attractive in this movie Okay, I mean particularly when she doffs her top because you can see the wrinkles in her sternum. Her breastbone is clearly visible through the thin sheen of skin.

It's her most prominent feature. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, and so that, yeah, things get hot and heavy. The top comes off, and for some reason, that's never quite explained, Bradley Cooper starts to get turned off. And it's almost immediately after he places both his hands on her breasts So I assume it has something to do with the the shape and texture of her memory glance Or a brazier. I mean come on It was pretty not her small boobs. Oh

The size of her breath I mean you know some gentlemen like a proportional breast. They're large breast fetishes like you are. You're really weird. Yeah, sorry about getting derailed, Brock. That's fine. I know that I do a lot of digressions about things and stuff. So yeah, so Brad LeCouper immediately, I have to get out of this situation.

You know, I'm feeling like the audience, this is the most unsexy thing I've ever witnessed or been a part of. So he makes up a lie because he's a TV news cameraman. Yeah, he needs a smoke bomb out of there, right? Exactly. And his smoke bomb comes in the form of a fake phone call saying that there's something going on in Boston and uh... being town sure u.s.a. sorry now i'm just derailing you not to make any valuable contributions no that was a little bit well sorry continue uh... okay so so there's breaking news in Boston i got

to go i really wish you could, but unfortunately the news is my mistress and I must heat her back and call. So the next day, Sandra Bullock is still swooning over this chance encounter in, I guess like an 88 Bronco with no backstage. eight Bronco with no back side. Sure. Sure. On a real love mobile. Yes, this dry hump on top of softball equipment has been so mind-blowingly erotic that I'm now. That's not a euphemism for this package, right?

She decides I'm going to make a crossword puzzle all about Steve. Yeah. I'm going to title all about Steve all about Steve. I'm going to title all about Steve exactly and I'm going to I'm gonna movie Dan holy shit clever stuff continue So I'm going to deliver this crossword to to my editor. He is going to print its site unseen It's gonna go out to to all the 7,402 readers in the Sacramento area And and this is how I will declare my love for steve unfortunately uh...

due to his own incompetence uh... her editor uh... sends this out without proof reading it of course uh... and uh... instantly blame sandrable like for his mistake and fires are on the spot uh... thus making her uh... now free to travel about the country and follow her new true love, Steve. Where are they going to get the rest of their fucking crosswords from? I'm sure there's a syndicated crossword service. I don't buy it.

You don't replace it with Sudoku or... You don't buy the luck fox or some shit. You don't buy that every newspaper in the country doesn't have their own dedicated crossword writer. Yeah, like the city of Sacramento. Sure. Okay. every newspaper in the country doesn't have their own dedicated crossword writer yeah city sacrament yeah so yeah she follows uh... steve around she you know there's a three there's a three-legged baby there's a big controversy about a three-legged

baby so she falls in there story big enough that uh... apparently this this major news uh... television news syndicate that's based in sacramental sends their one reporter out to cover up. Tom's Hayden Church. Yes, played by Tom's Hayden Church. Oh, the wings. Yes, that's his most significant role.

You will not talk about him being in sideways. You will not talk about him being the sandman and Spider-Man 3, Lowell from wings. That's how we all know Tom's Hayden Church. So the majority of Act 2 is is Sandra Bullock tracking down Steve, wherever he may, wherever his assignments call. Yeah, various news stories. And she's a crazy stalker, basically.

And like all crazy stalkers, she develops a following of weirdos and quirky people. Weirdos. Including DJ Kuala. And DJ. And one of my favorite movies of all time, of weirdos and quirky people. Weirdos including DJ Qualls. And DJ. And one of my favorite movies of all time, The New Guy, where he plays the titular character, who is in fact a new guy.

He is a new guy. Yeah, DJ Qualls and Katie Mixen from the hit HBO series Eastbound and Down, where she is the love interest for one what's his name uh... for Kenny Powers yeah Kenny Powers yeah jody jody hill joint but anyway so how does this all come come to a head brock uh... so yeah they they uh...

sonner boat uh... keeps tracking tracking down steve wherever goes uh... go to dawn by tomas haiden both uh... keeps tracking uh... tracking down steve wherever goes uh... go to dawn by tomas hate and churches uh... hampton hues uh... the dashing newsman who are part of the news yes i'm sorry and even stranger non-name uh... who apparently takes some sort of perverse pleasure out of torturing steve by goding his stalker on him yeah there's no motivation uh... established but uh... tomas hate and church comedic motivation well no I mean like as you said Stewart you're like I would totally fuck with my friends if they had a stalker and Thomas Hayden church

holding doll my friends out there that seems to be his only motivation he pulls sander ball like a side and he's like look Steve's in love with you don't don't listen to him if he says any words like Cookie or crazy or lunatic like you know just you just Steve once you just follow him around the country and he takes great joy and letting Sandlerblog know where Steve will be at any moment in time so she could follow him and harass him sexually Yeah, pretty much they they they wind up in Texas where a rare hurricane tornado combination is pounding the Galveston area. They run into some cicadas. Yeah, our cicadas

in the movie. Then, I guess, yeah, after the tornado, what they hitch a ride to somewhere in Pennsylvania, I believe, where a school class of deaf children have fallen into a giant sinkhole. Yeah, there's a band in mind. What? They must have not heard the sinkhole. They did not hear the sinkhole. Yeah, you show those deaf children. All I areas.

Yeah, a bunch of deaf children fell into a band in mind, and there's a whole like... There's a baby Jessica at times 10 situation going on, and Tom's hanging churches like, there's a baby Jessica times 10 situation going on. And Tom's saying church is out there and yeah, and the Santa book following Steve comes and she comes and she runs, she's like, she sees Steve across the meadow. And he looks good. Yeah, oh, finally, after so many days

of traveling across the country, I'm gonna be really delighted with Steve, and she runs across the meadow. When she said it, when she said it, it was kind of a higher pitched, and she made a fit in a lot of, a lot of trivia, more trivia. You know, as Voltaire said, I disagree with what you say, but I'll defend your death the right to say it. And she runs across the matter.

She falls down the fucking sinkhole directly into it. It's not like a rimshot. It's, you know, it's swish down the mind to its... I was expecting her legs to kick out comically. Now she runs directly into a hole. Like, there's a reason that everyone's there. And like, there's firemen, there's a big crane. But she runs right into the hole. not to get off on too much of a

diatribe but is apparently one of the motifs of the film which everybody is terrible at their job cynderbellics editor publishes her crossword puzzle without even looking at it these news these tomas hate and churches newscaster is more than willing to just make up stuff on the spot. At some point Bradley Cooper drops his camera. There's a bus driver who deliberately leaves Sandra will look by the side of the road just because she's irritating. Yes, the teachers that are guarding this class of deaf children let them aimlessly just run ahead of them. And then they miscount the number of deaf children, let them aimlessly just run ahead of them.

And then they miscount the number of deaf children that get pulled out of the hole. Yeah, there's no buddy system here, there's just one child who was still down there when Sandra Bullock falls down into the hole. And she does like a pepula pew floating on winds of love after Bradley Cooper falls down the hole. But anyway, to wrap up the story,

Sandra Bullock figures out a way to do a counterweight thing Yeah, but anyway, you know to wrap up the story Sandra Bullock Figures out a way to do like a counterweight thing with the The the the crane like the crane has already like fallen halfway on the sequel so they can't use it normally But she figures out a way of like using it as like a pulley and like pulling a counterweight and Thomas Hayden Church Has like jumped down the hole because he feels guilty about learning Sandra Bullock out here so she can fall down the hole. And so Sandra Bullock just adds a few more rocks to the counterweight and she gets up out of the hole.

Apparently it was a rock mine. Yeah. But not until after she's had her like, smegel and gollum like moment where she, you know, she talks to herself for a while in front of this deaf girl. And the deaf girl says that she talks too much. Well, she doesn't say that, she signs it.

That's the irony of it. Oh, right. Yeah. But then at the end, Bradley Cooper has come to realize that Sandra Bullock is special and not just in a mentally deficient way. In the words of the TV newscast that he overhears, she's crazy smart like Ted Kaczynski. And he thinks that's an unfair characterization.

Totally unmotivated. This other channel. Ted Kaczynski was smart in a completely different way. This other channel was smearing Santa Claus for no reason. This woman who's just fallen out a hole. That's all they know about her. She fell down the hole because she's an idiot.

Sure. Or very unobservant. But then they're like, oh, she's crazy smart like this homegrown terrorist. Bradley Cooper Defense, her by saying, she sees things other people don't see, which does not include holes in the ground. Because other people see that, but she's quite oblivious. But anything, you're better off in life being able to see holes in the ground because other people see that but she's quite oblivious but anything you're better off in life being able to see holes in the ground than any sort of hidden insight into people's souls or or you know area

heightened knowledge but Sandra Bulk makes her way out of the hole but if she hadn't fallen in that hole that deaf girl probably would have gotten eaten by chug through magman or some shit more's fine is it she it was also the good but uh... and also uh... badly cooper learned that uh... you know sandra book had something to offer lesson but they do not enough together they there's not enough you know there's not enough there where's the rom in this calm there's no rom

no problem is calm uh... so sander book Bullock is hoisted on the shoulders of her supporters, who just support her basically because she fell down the well. That's it, like it's baby Jessica all over again. Aspiring politicians fall down a hole. Yeah, exactly. Well, I think that Ace and the whole taught us that years and years ago. And Bradley Cooper looks on shaking his head as

I have to say like, oh, Sandra Bullock, you know, wicked smart, but we can't have a relationship but God bless her. Yeah. And God bless that crazy girl. She would have been a demon in bed. Yeah. It would stay on. Nice. That's pretty crazy. Okay, so yeah, that was pretty much Jason Jones is in this He's a lot of fucking people are in this carry Kenny silver from the state and Reno 9-1 One has a small role as we said DJ called Katie mixin MC Gainey as people know as a Mr Friendly from lost was in this movie as a trucker who gave Sandra Bullock a ride Casting yeah like the the as I said before like the below the line cast is amazing on this movie. Keith David.

Keith David, as much as I know from many video game voice over works. Yeah, or the guy that Roughty-Roughty Piper fought with him they live. But he was the boss of Bradley Cooper and Thomas Hayne Church like a really a strong cast They all they all read the script for all about Stephen like sign me fucking up and I might point out that yes Steve's boss is terrible Yeah, just to continue that theme he frequently puts things on the air live without any sort of pre-taping or without any sort of Coaching as to what's actually going to be covered that's not right yeah there's a there's a thing where there's a hostage situation where like there's a dead horse

and times i'm sure to make a big deal about the dead horse but apparently the dead horse is trained to fall over when he hears a gunshot and there was a backfiring car and so that was a big story that went out live it was a very unfunny scene that we all had to watch that i but i that went out live. It was a very unfunny scene that we all had to watch. Which I, the part of the question again. But how much longer is a backfire in car

going to be able to be a comedic trope? I mean, nobody has standard transmissions anymore. It's all automatic. Cars don't backfire anymore. You're ruining me living in this neighborhood, Brock, because for the audience, for the people who don't know where I live, which would be'm like, are those gunshots? Sure. And I tell myself that they're backfiring cars and you're telling me cars, they're in pain popping.

Yeah. Somebody listening to the TV too loud and it's a bit like. We should also fill in the den does live in a neighborhood that has lots of shame in popping going on. Lots to celebrate in this neighborhood. We should also fill in the den. We should also fill in the den does live in a neighborhood that has lots of shame in popping going on. Lots listening to the TV too loud. We should also fill in the Dan does live in a neighborhood that has lots of champagne popping going on. Lots to celebrate in this neighborhood. Yeah. Life has been good to everybody who lives around these parts.

Brooklyn. So you're telling me that those are all gunshots. So all right, thank you for that. Maybe who? At least they're not like crossbows. That'd be weird. That would be weird. Maybe I'm the lookout for vampires or some shit. If I heard a lot of bolts whizzing through the air. Yeah, like crossbow bolts.

Yeah. So speaking of crossbows, the presentation of crosswords in this film is a little strange to me. First off, Sandra will, as we said, Roncom, she has to have a quirky job and the job that they gave her was Crossword writer. Yeah, that bothers you. It does bother. Well, there's a lot of weird stuff. The first scene that we see her interacting with her editors, her going in and insisting, like, hey, we could do crosswords five days a week and it could be like the times and there would be an easy one on Monday and a hard one on Friday. And the guys like,

yeah, we were small newspaper, we can't do crosswords every day we every week day so apparently there's just one crossword a week for this newspaper and I think that most newspapers that carry a crossword actually have crosswords all through the week yeah it's typical people will you know like we'll read it every week and I think that crossword I mean as print fails like the crossword is actually something that is still popular. People actually care about, I mean, you know, not as Sudoku's come along, it's less popular, but people care about the crossword.

So that was weird to me. Number one- And number two- Also, it was weird to me that then he used that as an opportunity to- not only edit her work, but also edit her life the way she lives it saying why don't you be more normal yeah i want to have a date instead of coming out with extra crosswords want to go out to uh... chiles and and i have a nice meal margarita nine

yes ultimate margaritas at chiles but also the all that steas we talked about this crossword got through the greenlit and the editing process. I mean, there were questions like, number one across, who would be something like Steve's eye color. Number two across would be like, what Steve lips taste like? What was strange was people's reaction to it, though.

Because we first see the reaction before finding out what the crossword actually was made up of and people are like this doesn't make sense. Well that was fine. What's going on here? But that doesn't make sense to me is that it's pretty clear that they just don't know who Steve is. Like what color are Steve's eyes? Yeah, I don't know who the fuck Steve is. It's not that it doesn't make sense. It's not like they're trying to have me Make it make a crossword then like three dimensions or something that wouldn't make sense I would just be like well. I don't know who Steve is so that I'm like I can't answer this

It's too different a bullshit cross. It's too difficult is what I'm trying to say. It's not like they broke the the laws of crosswords I think no, I think it actually is more like they broke the laws of crosswords because when you do a crossword, you lose gold, was it one of the questions? No, but you're entering into a pact with the crossword writer like, okay, this is general knowledge. This is somehow knowable rather than like, this is about a guy that I met. But although I would like to see Will Schorz put together something about a guy he met. If only just to see that window into his soul open up.

What is the people he hangs out with? He has a mustache just like Steve or just like Will. Yeah. Now what bothered me more was in that montage, it started out normal. People doing the crossword on the bus. I hate this crossword. This doesn't make any sense. But then there was literally a scene where there, it was a bathroom

and all of the people in the bathroom stall. The camera panned down from one person to bathroom stall to the next person to the next person and they're all apparently doing this crossword at the same time, complaining about this crossword. And this is a town where like crosswords are the bees knees. Everyone does the crossword. And apparently everybody uses the toilet at the same time. So we're no empty stalls. Yes, everyone does the crossword while on the toilet and discusses the crossword.

That's why the crossword, everyone. That's what they're doing is working the crossword in the toilet. In this day and age of like portable electronic devices, you would think that there wouldn't be quite as many people that are going nuts about the local papers crosswords. Yeah, I do the crossword on my iPhone, but I do not do the local crossword. Oh really? You would have probably a fancy crossword?

Sure, what? Well, I mean, as a New Yorker, I have to say, the local crossword is too hard for me. I do the onions crossword is too hard for me i do the onions crossword which is easier okay that's good anyway you lose gold on their lot you and you these go it's a great movie so uh... what else is going on with this movie

i didn't really care about the crossword stuff and uh... there was a romance and it wasn't funny i mean i actually i laughed at a couple of jason jones jokes at jason jones acquitted himself well i'm going to be we were talking about how it was bad that alley it was it was good that alley it was not here because alley it may need to make a reason make fun of uh... his co-worker jason

jones but jason jones was one of the bright spots in the film so uh... he came out of the movie relatively unscathed I feel like uh Ken Geong Ken Geong of The hangover fame and knocked up TV's community. Yeah, he was in this movie kind of a boring role for him. Yeah very boring Nothing to say about him I'm not sure. Nothing to say about him.

If you ever want to see Ken Yong as a straight man, rent all about Steve. If you're tired of him doing crazy funny improvs where he's yelling about stuff, I wanted to just be like a pussycat character. This is the film for you. Also, if you want to waste an evening, you can also rent this

similithing if you want to hit yourself some of the balls hammer you can watch this movie instead if you don't have a hammer yeah i mean for the i guess the same feeling you're going for a while it's a quiff if you want to see a center bullock slide down a banister and nothing but a

talent of bathing cap why would you think that's a good idea she want to see a Sandra Bullock slide down a banister. It's nothing but a talent bathing cap Why would she think that's a good idea? She's coming out of the bathroom She's put it down to the character Anyone anyone in the film she's coming out of the bathroom She's had a bath she has just a teller round and she's going to slide down a banister and literally You can imagine you don't slide very well. No, but like also she slings her leg over. You can imagine her bare vagina

is what is sliding down this banister. You're looking at me, Stuart. I'm thinking about a bear's vagina right now. I thought you were looking at me as if you weren't imagining that, but that's the only thing you can think about. It's enough. Like she is nude and she's sliding down this banister it's an image that gets stuck

in your head and it makes you realize why some people have sex with Nazis I guess you're right if you've ever wondered what what's what's what drove a man to to to to stick it into some white supremacist tattooed lady it... it is that that scene in the film topical all right the uh... the cowboy fellow that she was married to jesse james yeah of the james gang

famous he's a big fan of the improv he thought of the time machine right? into a tattoo parlour and married Oscar winner and Razzie winner, right? Yeah, she went Razzie. Now we should talk about that because she is desperately committed to this part. She is really pouring her heart and soul into this and the movie is not giving back to her like that that this is an ill-conceived

uh... role i mean this role is opposed to be lovely corky but you watch this film and you're like this woman has a mental disorder of some kind like she is way down the asperger scale like she has a uh... disability no clearly yeah it's not it's not about highlights as a disability. Oh, clearly, yeah. Yeah.

And it's not our bad highlights. Boom. Boom. Boom, a redressor. Now, I was about to make a comment like it might not be fair for her to get a rassy. Because I mean, her part's just written really poorly and a really poorly written movie in general.

And the end as people reported, she was a good sport. She showed up to the rassy, she accepted her as a person. And I guess, I guess, when you're nominated for an Oscar, like, it's not like they're like, oh, well, you know, the only reason they're winning is because they got, like, the part was written really well, I mean. So I guess, I guess it's her fault. Certainly not true for the blind side.

Zing! Boom! Man, good one, dude. Anyway. Well, regardless, I mean, she's still a producer on the film. She has the power to rewrite stuff if it's not working. Yeah, there's a certain amount of culpability. Yeah. Yeah, it was really bad.

She wasn't funny at all. There's a lot of failed attempt. Like, I have it not... I mean, it's tough for a woman to be in a lot of failed attempt like i have it not like i mean it's it's tougher for a woman to be in a kind of like a physical comedy like a comedy the man's world story in a man's world absolutely which is physical comedy to some extent uh... and i mean like it has it hasn't been since we watched dirty love together that i've i've seen a woman tried to do like wacky gross out

comedy or just wacky comedy and fail so badly Yeah, and be like pretty closely painful to watch Oh god Let's move you guys But this movie didn't feature a scene where Jenny McCarthy is slipping around on her own and Superlod and a grocery store That did not happen. No This movie did have a tornado in it for some reason.

There was a tornado. It had a tornado and sandrable look falling down a well. Two things that I did not expect to see and all about Steve. Yeah, actually, those were surprises. I didn't spend 20 minutes of this movie in the bathroom crying like I expected. So that was kind of surprised Scrumming yourself. Yep, it's rubbing the dirt off, but I just can't get clean I got to see Santa Bullock's likeness carved into an apple, which is something that I never thought I'd see

That's true. You do get that uh, yeah, DJ Kuals character trait is he somehow makes a living selling apple carvings You know famous people like Mother Teresa and skinny, fespian, DJ, quals, that's his quirky job in this film. It's a living. Pays well enough to get bumper stickers made. Sure. Which is the last thing you see before the car disappears into a volcano. I mean, tornado rather.

Wait, there's a hole. Oh man, I didn't even see the cicadas it's they're saving that for the sequel and it's doable somehow be able to reconstruct it out of the wreckage like she did in this film when the car disappeared in the truck yeah yeah they fixed the car man I don't even want to talk about that this movie I mean in a way this movie felt like a weird like the movie wanted to be kind of a parody of a rom-com. You know, like, I feel like...

Okay, try and sell me on this idea. I feel like it's two steps away from being a smarter movie that's like, hey, you know what? Every fucking protagonist in a romantic comedy is actually mentally ill. And what they're doing is stalking and it's crazy. But this movie did not have the courage of its convictions because halfway through the movie they start making Sandra Bullock a lovable misfit and at the end of the movie Bradley

Cooper is like, oh you know what she's just you know she's just a sweetheart you know she's she's people people don't understand her she's smart and she's, she's, people don't understand her. She's smart and she's funny, she's great, and someday she's gonna find someone who really makes her happy. You know, but like, up until that point, like it kind of felt like it wanted to be a little smarter than it was, and be like, you know what, these people are fucking loons, and you should be afraid of them. Yeah, definitely. I mean yeah definitely all the other the way the characters up until about the midpoint of the film react to center of a looks character is completely rational i mean they they openly tell her to her face

that she is insane and that she shouldn't be behaving this way and you know she is acting like a sociopath but and that she makes a lot of these choices there typical romantic comedy choices Like just up and like running along to go see this guy and like even the world starts going against her a little bit like The bus drivers like man this fucking bitch is crazy and kicks her off the bus or like trick her to get off the bus and It's almost like the world is trying to like show you that this person like that kind of behavior is not Going to actually succeed for you. Yeah.

In a way it doesn't, but it's still terrible. I watch. Oh God. I don't know. I think that we, we need to shut it down, guys. I think we need to make our final judgments on this film. Okay. So to sum up again, four people who don't listen regularly, the categories are, is a good

bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie that you actually kind of liked in some way. Stuart, I'm going to go to you first, because you're staring pincifully off into the middle distance while wearing my hat. I'm actually kind of divided on this one, because it is a terrible movie and it isn't really that much fun to watch, but there's enough stupid stuff in it and enough stuff that is really questionable. A lot of the decisions are questionable that it makes it like you kind of want to watch it because it's kind of fun to watch this terribly made movie.

And a lot of people that have been good in other things, like Keith David, for instance, getting a chance to act in a movie. So I can't completely say one or the other. This is a terrible movie though. It doesn't really work on any level. And Proc would be able to say that. I would say that this is a bad, bad bad movie okay uh... there uh...

uh... if it's it's it's good if you want to be infuriated by uh... by loose threads that are never explained uh... by the fact that it could not have been written if not for wikipedia the uh... the amount of trivia that is crammed into uh... center billx dialogue uh... i did not really dialogue though It's mainly just monologues. Yeah, it's as if her inner monologue is somehow being broadcast to the viewers. Such an irritating principle character.

Like a character that every time she's on the screen, it makes you want to go into the other room. And that's a large portion of the movie. Yeah, true. I'm going to go, you know, it's going to be a full spectrum. I'm going to give this a marginal good-bad rating because I feel like it's a weird, this movie's a weird duck. There's like individual jokes in it that are actually genuinely funny because like somewhere, someone involved in it had like some instincts to do like smart things.

I mean like there's good casting, there's some like really like wacky stuff that is kind of funny, but like those good jokes are not connected to anything larger. As a movie on the whole, it's like completely ill-conceived. The main character, as we said, is a lunatic who you don't have a sympathy for because she's just irritating and she doesn't have any social sense of anything at all.

However, part of the movie wants to be a little subversive and point out the fact that she's only going to take who you should not be sympathizing with. But then the movie goes soft and wants to have it both ways and have her be a level-of-miss fit. But there's enough stuff in it that's just so well-conceived that you have to see it. I want to recommend it as a good bad movie. The thing is that there's large chunks of the movie where they're trying to get across this message of like, oh, just be yourself. Like, oh Sandra Bullock, this quirky person, like, oh, she's an original, but no, in fact, she's like an autistic person and not to say anything bad about autistic people, but

like, you don't want to be one. Well, I've yet the choice. and not to say anything bad about autistic people, but like, you don't wanna be one. Like, well, have you had the choice? Yeah, but what I'm trying to say is you're not like, I wanna be like a crazy autistic person. Like, nobody's gonna say that. Not even an autistic person. So, I don't like that point doesn't work, like, because she's not just like a quirky creative person,

she's a person with a handicap. Well, we're gonna hear from a lot of people with autism. I feel like after you've- I'm sorry. Crisis of events, okay. All right, well, no, that's been done. I'm gonna move on to some sort of mailbag. This is not technically the mailbag.

This is, we're going to talk about some of the comments on the last episode. Okay. First off, we got a comment about how we were looking for Flophouse babies who were conceived during the Flophouse. And Guardo, the gentleman who has the hotcakes podcast who couldn't remember my name for a while, but then apologize for not knowing my name. Sure. It says a memorable, I guess. Yeah, no, we've established that. Staying, right?

Staying on the phone. All about staying. And by the way, this film, you know, all about Steve, not that great, but certainly better than the magnificent stamp standpersons and But not quite as good as the postman always rings Gary But like Wartus says just a comment regarding floppas babies My wife has pregnant with our first child who's conceived vert via IUI Infraudory insemination. Congratulations.

Yeah, congrats. But since the procedure was performed on a Monday, it's possible that the conception did take place while I was listening to the podcast. More specifically, it would have been the Dragon Ball Evolution episode. I've been racking my brain to figure out a way to name the channel regardless of sex. After all, you guys, is there a single name that captures the spirit of Dan, Elliot, and Stewart? Or do you guys happen to all share a middle name? That would be crazy, man. What I would recommend first is to talk to your wife about this one. Number one. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I think that's currently the fifth most popular male name. Sounds like a title of a Spanish robber. Oh, Daniela! Yeah, we meet again. I don't want to take anything away from this fine gentleman because he's the only one who's so far

responded to our call for- He conceived a baby to But I don't know I don't know whether it's counts. I don't know whether whether in dissemination Counts is conceiving out to the floppa. Well, it's not like they were fucking Dude You know what you're saying about religion. Oh, okay. I thought you were saying something about it I'm saying that I want people to be involved in the carnal act of love while listening to our show.

I want to think of us as like facilitators. We set a romantic mood. So you're more interested in finding out the people that have sex while listening to our podcast. I'm more interested in the actual creation of Jews. No, I look childbirth is of June. No, I look. Childbirth is a miracle. Yeah.

No doubt. But I want to hear the dirty, dirty stories of people fucking. Like, okay. Well, listen to our show. That's what I want to hear. Cool. Yeah, that's up. I mean, Brock, you can understand this.

Well, I think my main concern is that why would you ever deprive the world of a little Guardo Jr. Guardo II? I like that. Yeahrive the world of a little Guardo Jr. Or Guardo the second. I like that. Yeah, it's such a great name. I don't need to make it a flop house related. I mean, you have a name like Guardo. It's beautiful. Pass it on to the next.

That's musical. Yeah, I also do want to hear dirty, dirty, stale tales of banging to a podcast. Yeah. So I think about Elliot Wall, I do it. to hear dirty, dirty, stale tales of banging to a podcast. Yeah. So I think about Elliott while I do it, is that that's the only way you can maintain our erection. Yeah. That, oh, I don't, I'm not going to keep.

So, um, I'm just going to, I'm going to run through it. Like we had a lot of comments in the last show. I'm going to run through like a good thing or a, well, good thing or what is a good thing but there was a request we should do a flop-ass movie of minute of your depressing recipes okay oh for wait what was depressing about your unemployment recipes as one of the commenters says uh Matt he says uh I was trying to remember all of the two of the recipes from memory last night and It could only remember the grilled cheese hamburger one. That's a good one.

Yeah, well, what is that exactly? Well, you know, what you do is you make a, you make a, you, you've had a hamburger before, right? I have. Well, I'm gonna flip your lid. Imagine instead of two buns, okay? You have two grilled cheese sandwiches. And then the burger in the middle?

Burger in the middle. Now, let's take that a step further. Okay. Instead of bread, you have two grilled cheese sandwiches. And then the burger in the middle? Burger in the middle. Now, let's take that a step further. Okay. Instead of bread, you have red baron frozen pizzas. Okay. Okay. And instead of cheese, you have cream cheese or like grier, or brie. And then for the bottom, we're going to make this even crazier.

You have two Oreo pizzas. Okay, the dessert pizzas. Okay, and instead of cheese, you have, well, I mean, you still have cheese. I probably cheddar. I think cheddar goes well with most sweets, something that, you know, like an apple pie with cheddar.

So that's the, and then you have obviously, you know, 100% ground beef. I usually go a little bit lean sometimes. Instead of beef, I use bison meat. Okay, because that's a little better. Yeah, a little hot. I prefer the bison because it makes me feel more like a guy. Just killed a bison.

Sure. You feel like you're depleting one of the natural resources of this great land. Yeah, well, what about an ostrich, dude? They're in danger, too. It's not indigenous, though. Well, yeah, I I mean if I was Australian they would be right. Okay well sure fair enough. Anyway we're gonna continue. We're running a long time actually we apparently we had more to say

about this film tonight than I thought. But there was the message boards were on fire. Yeah they were on fire about back to the future part two, and they were all on agreement that I was right that there was a paradox in back to the future part two. I just recommend that everyone listening goes to theflophaspodcast.com, www.theflophaspodcast.com and reads the comments about back to the future part two

and the paradox inherent in it. Are you talking to our listeners or our team? I'm talking to specifically to you, Stuart, because you seem so disinterested in my long depression about Back to Future. Before the argument? No, it was not a bit. Go back and listen to the law-backed citizen.

But there was a commenter that said specifically that he finds it amusing that all of the the comments about on the on the message boards were about back to the future and not law-abiding citizen. That was a well apparently that was like an open and shut case like there was nothing more that can be said about law-abiding citizen after all. Yeah, but there's so much, there's a rich vein to dive into in the back of each of films. Yeah, law-abiding citizen, you've been served. Stick a fork in that movie, it's been properly picked. Step up to the streets.

Sure. Are we going to watch it? There's a 3D one of those coming out. Are we going to watch that? Oh, holy shit, we are going to. Well, that's the summer. It'll be weird, though, because wait, can we watch a 3D one of those coming out. We're gonna watch that. Oh, holy shit. We are gonna, well, that's the summer. It'll be weird though, because wait, can we watch in 3D on the TV here? We might have to go to the movie theater.

We may have to go to the movie theater and do a flop house. Expersion. Hmm. Uh, feel it for it. Which we'll let everybody know when we're going. So we can get a theater bursting with flop house fans. Sure. I'm sure that'll happen.

Um, now the next thing that we do here is we talk about movies that actually enjoyed, um, bursting with flop house fans. Sure. I'm sure that'll happen. Now, the next thing that we do here is we talk about movies that we actually enjoyed. Just to make us seem less like jerks. And so Brock, I know that you've put a lot of thought into this. I have. Yes, this is a movie I want to recommend.

Recently with Elliott, it's entitled A New Leaf. It's written and directed and starring Elaine May. It's one of her first filmmaking efforts. It also stars Walter Mathau as a incredibly obscenely rich millionaire who has lost all his money through his profligate ways. And he comes up with a deal with his uncle who hates him, basically loan me $50,000 for the next six weeks. And I will find somebody that I can marry and then live off of for the rest of my life. And what Walter Mathau then hides from his uncle is that if he doesn't find a wife within six weeks, he is going to kill himself.

So it's a whirlwind tour of all the freakish women of high society. And eventually right before the end of the six weeks, he finds Elaine Mays, character who is quirky, but charmingly so. And a box-sander boat. Exactly. The quirks are maintained she actually shows proficiency at her her job which is botany uh... she is uh... you know constantly uh... and appropriately using metaphors related to her job unlike Sandra but look in this film uh... who is uh...

amazingly a depth at talking about cross repulsing in a uh... vague and uh... who is uh... amazingly a depth at talking about cross repulsing in a uh... vague and uh... yeah non-specific but uh... anyway uh... to get back to a new leaf which is a very funny very uh... very entertaining film uh... i wrote would recommended highly it's uh... after Walter math out falls uh... or attempts to woo Elaine may he decides that he's going to kill her and take over her estate. But as time goes on realizes that he has second thoughts about his course of action.

It also stores a surprisingly sexy Doris Roberts, which is a side of her that I never thought I would see. I'm not surprised. Okay, but yeah, very entertaining. It's a rom-com that is heavy on the com, which will be a nice palette cleanser after anybody who dares to watch all about Steve. Well, I haven't watched anything new recently. I haven't had time to watch anything new recently that I would recommend, but I did rewatch the man who wasn't there, which is a Cohen Brothers movie that I feel was unjustly forgotten.

I agree with you 100%. I think that every day that goes by I think that might be their best film. Really? Yeah. I don't know if I would go that far, but it's a very strong movie that you know it came did it come directly after Fargo or directly after the oh brother were out there came was I think it was even the same year as oh brother We're out that we're at least within the same 12 months. Yeah Yeah, it came back to back really quickly and yeah for whatever reason I agree with you Sort of slipped off the radar for whatever reason. And I like El Brother War, they're a lot, but I actually like the man who wasn't there better,

and I like the man who wasn't there better than some of the later Cohen Brothers movies that have gotten sort of more respect, because it's more coony, like it has a lot of distilled coonness, and it's beautifully shot. It's a pastiche, but it's a pastiche but it's not like slavishly so like it has its own thing going on. It manages to take all of these

cultural like signifiers from the time period that it's set in and turn them into something new and I feel like the end of the man who wasn't there is actually deeply moving. Absolutely, yeah. I mean, it's an incredibly funny film, but at the same time, there's like a rich vein of sadness that gets mind frequently. Yeah, Billy Bob Thurtons, his performance,

I always find fascinating and how much he's able to convey without Doing anything. Yeah Well, I think the co-ins like I mean the rapping against them is always that they're like This these unsympathetic puppet masters, but I feel like I don't I I feel like that's people who I Actually, I said this online. I like I was writing something. I feel like this is people who Confused being nice with being actually like I said this online I was writing something I feel like this is people who confuse being nice with being good like I you know the coons do not ever you know allow their characters to get away with anything like they cast a very stern on them but at the same time like there's a lot of sympathy and empathy there. I feel like for their characters and, you know, Billy Bob Thornton is this guy who's caught

up in something sort of larger that he doesn't ever fully understand, but it's very sad and touching at the end, you know, like where he comes to. Stuart, what do you think? Well, guys, I'm going to recommend a movie that I saw recently, but I'm not actually going to talk very much about it because I think a lot has already been said. Watched Rambo first blood part two. And there's this really awesome scene where he's shooting arrows at a village and all the village explodes And there's this other scene where

There's woman he loves it's shot with an ag 47 By a bunch of dudes with ag 47's so he picks up an ag 47 and kind of fires indiscriminately at them and one by one they start falling down dead and Yeah, he fires way more bullets than would be in the the clip, but that's that's cool because it's Rambo mean So yeah Rambo first blood bar two good movie the full spectrum tonight recommendations laughs sadness

And awesome battling. Hey guys. Oh, that's Steve. Yeah, plugs, anyone want a plug? I got a plug. Oh, yeah, you wanted to plug something. I got to plug something. First of all, I'd like everyone to know that if you live in the Park Slope or what Windsor

Tarot, no, I don't know. If you live near Flatbush, you should go to Charlene's Bar to watch the World Cup because we just got a projector and it's really cool. And we're going to be serving bagels and coffee. And I'm going to be there. So if you want to talk about soccer or crappy movies, I'll be there. And I'll be work, I got a job, Dan. Holy shit. I did, yeah. Talk about burying the lead.

I know. I'm going to be working a couple of shifts at Prospect Park for Celebrate Brooklyn. So if you want to see me, this is a free concert series that Brooklyn puts on in Prospect Park. So and if you want to see, I have a free autograph from Stewart, you can come by and yell at me, and I'll sign something for you. Yeah, it'll be at the bar. Probably, yeah. All right, well, I mean, as all of our plugging things, I will plug 9AM meeting.com. Do it. My animated web series, Brock, would you like to plug it?

I'll plug www.wimcorderly.com, the humor magazine that's currently now in its third issue. It features writing from people like Dan and a lot of other very talented people. And it's a humor magazine. It's printed on flammable paper. The heat goes out one cold winter night. You're going to wish that you'd bought 20, so you have some kindling for the fire. Yeah, you get some laughs, and then you get a fire.

You get bigger laughs as you watch it, Crinkle and Burn in the Flames. It's beautifully put together. If I was not i can trip you know i would still enjoy this magazine uh... so guys i guess that's it uh... brach i hope that you uh... have lived to regret

insisting upon a worse movie than paul blart mall clop which racially for next time around and i think you're very much for a quick one of for next time around. But thank you very much for having me. I have a request for one of those two. But yeah, it's this is the second time that I've done it. And it's always a lot of fun. So thanks for having me back. Thanks for coming. And it's time to sign off for the flop house.

I've been Dan McCoy. I've been steward Wellington. And I've been rock my hand. Good night, everyone. You taller than Elliot, too. I think that goes to your credit. I mean, I don't have any, I don't have a background in, I'm not a working screenwriter or anything, Dan. I'm not a working comedy writer.