The Flop House - The Flop House Movie Minute #21 - Who Watches the Watchmen's Penises

Episode Date: March 8, 2009

Turns out it's Whoopi Goldberg.

And now the flop house movie minute. So Elias, you got to go to a special screening of Watchmen recently. Is that correct? That is indeed correct. I got to go to a special industry screening set up for industry people in the entertainment industry, particularly the television industry. They have these screenings, you know, all over New York for reviewers or people who are booking talent or booking guests for television shows.

And I luckily got to go to this one for Watchmen at the Warner Brothers screening room, the Sunday before the Friday that it opened. So I got like a five day jump on everybody and I was all like, ah, this is what they cut out of the movie and no one wanted to hear what I would have to say about it. But since it was an industry screening, it's a fairly small theater. It was just me and a couple other people from work and Jimmy Fallon and Wuppie Goldberg.

And so it was maybe the strangest audience I've ever been in for anything. Mostly, it was like seeing it at any movie theater where there's almost no one in the theater. You're just sitting back and enjoying the experience of a three hour superhero movie with, you know, extra gore and stuff like that. But as everyone knows, the character of Dr. Manhattan played by Billy Crudeup is nude through most of the story. And whereas in the comic book, this is kind of tastefully

portrayed. His genitals are not emphasized. Oftentimes they're out of the frame. In the movie, it's almost like they're going out of their way to make sure you see as penis as much as possible. It's pretty big and I don't understand unless they had motion sensors on Billy Crittop's actual penis. I don't know why there's so much movement of the penis. Every kind of every time he steps his penis waggles around or flops around and in the scene where there's three of him at once, there's three penises at once on screen and they're all equally floppy. But the best thing about seeing that in this particular screening was that the first time it came on, we'll be Goldberg, I imagine was not familiar with the source material,

not probably not a big Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons fan. It wasn't following Promethea, you know, from first issue to last or the originals or anything like that. First time Dr. Manhattan's penis was on screen, she said very loudly, that's a big blue penis. And then every single time the penis appeared on screen from that point on, she would laugh very loudly.

And just couldn't get enough of the novelty of this giant blue penis that was on screen. For much of the movie, the penis should get fairly high billing. It has more screen time than Hollis Mason, the first night owl, or the two cops who are investigating the comedian's murder or the news vendor. Many of the characters we love from Watchmen have less screen time than this penis, but every time she just couldn't get enough of it, she would just laugh every time.

And at the end of it, we were walking out at the same time she was and she was getting into a van which I thought it looked like she was being kidnapped or something. But she said to us, tell them they have to cut it a little bit, make it a little shorter, and everyone thought I had the same thought at the same time. Did she mean the movie or the penis? And to this day we'll never know. We'll be, we'll take that information to her grave with her.

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