The Frank Skinner Show - Allergic to Cats

Episode Date: September 7, 2026

Frank and Em are back, and they’re joined by Katie Norris. Frank’s allergic to cats, Em’s been hanging out with Gandhi, and Katie’s been getting DM proposals. If you want to message the show, email us at [e-mail] or WhatsApp us on 07457 417 769. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Great news. The federal EV rebate is back. Eligible customers get up to $5,000 with the federal EVAP rebate on select 2027-volt and 2026 Equinox EV models. Visit your local Chevrolet dealer today for more details. Do you wish you could just hit skip on the worst parts of your life? You know, the same way you can skip an ad? I get it. I'm Siaia and I live in Ice Cove. I've made some questionable decisions that didn't end up the way I planned. And today, I'm still figuring it out. Somehow things usually get worse before they get better.

Apparently, that's how I roll. So bundle up and come along for the bumpy ride. Stream a new episode of North of North Tuesdays on CBC Gem. It's Frank. Frank's going to podcast, don't you know. Rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens. I don't like kittens. This is Frank off the radio.

I'm joined by Emily Dean and Katie Norris. follow the podcast on X and Instagram you can email the podcast for a Frank off the radio at Avalon UK.com WhatsApp What's up? Nice

That was played in Edinburgh wasn't it at the last one we did? Oh was it? You couldn't hear it as well I'm still reeling from I don't like kittens Yeah that was weird Tell me why

I don't like kittens I don't like I'm allergic to cats So I don't see why I should You know Give in on my side Is it the dander? It is the dander.

And it's amazing you and David Badeel because he is now Catman. It's a copyright thing. If you say the word cat, we probably have to pay him now. And your friendship has survived. Well, do b'bawammy for Dave. In Wittstable,

someone did a mural, a sort of Banksy style mural of me during the World Cup, mean football kit. With David? No, just me. Are you actually joking? To be honest, it was Skinner Alley was the road, so it sort of justified it.

But as a double whammy, because obviously I sent it to Dave and said, have you seen this? Oh. The double whammy was the artist, the Bangsy artist, is called Catman. As if Dave had done it. How did Dave react? Was he okay about it? Have you heard back? Yes.

Okay. Lovely. Okay. No, it was very good mural. I was at a place with it. A mural, but a catman. Oh, of course. He might call it a mural.

I bet Catman's never thought of that. Because he's an artist, he doesn't think about pawns. They don't do words. If you're listening, Catman, we're happy for him to have that. Are you, Emma Georgia? No, God, yeah. Mural is yours. Mee-Rul. Yeah.

Do they get a mew? Cats. Miao, it's more meaural. Well, you should know. A meo-o-roll sounds like it might have been made from Musley. That's what worries me. A me owl.

Yeah. Use it, Catman. I'll write to him, Mr. C, Man, Wittsam. David Badell's lawyers are already writing to him on account of him using the name Catman. What again? What was his TV show?

David Badeo was out recently, wasn't it? What was it called, Frank? Catman. A Catman, yeah. And it was about cats. I enjoyed it, and Frank was on it. And on the very first episode. Well, he said,

very early doors look up and I saw on the trailer he said, I don't like cats. Well, I think I was on, oh great. I was on to, I was like a control in the experiment. Do you know what I mean? Because there were so many people

were utterly obsessed with cats. I'm obsessed with cats. Are you? My debut hour was about my cat being taken by a neighbour. What cat have you got, incidentally? Yeah, he's,

Moggy, but also a little bit Bengal. Oh, yeah. Got on the first day of lockdown. Lovely. I love a Bengal. Do you? No.

Yeah, I liked that close your eyes. Give me your hand, darling. Can you feel my heartbeat? I'm waiting for Katie to join in. Do you understand? Do you feel the same? Am I only dream? Is this?

Burning an eternal flame. And relax. There we go. I like that. What a voice, Katie Norris has got. Like a goddamn angel. I'm not bad after a month in Edinburgh, is it? No, it's good.

She's got the voice of an angel. Ice of an angel, that's all right. You know when I was in Edinburgh, I realised this is, I mean, you won't like me for this. Go on. But I thought. I dread to think what this is. show was shit. No, I didn't.

I thought your show was fantastic. I saw your show. I said many times. But I, I realised I didn't know how to work washing machine. Oh, well, do you know why that is? I've enabled this behaviour

because when we shared a flat, we didn't share a flat in Edinburgh, but we were staying up there together. We shared a washing machine. Well, we did. And who washed everything? I know, but I didn't ask you to. It was an act of kindness.

He'd never asked me to do that. He's not. like that. I offered because you know what, I felt desperately sorry for him. She washed my pants. I felt sorry for him. He didn't know what to do. Your lingerie? Yeah, exactly. I'd committed to large array. I did it out of compassion. Yeah. Did you have a similar problem this time? Well, I couldn't work the fucking thing out. I was frightened to ask my wife in case she said, well, yeah, well, we know why you can't. I couldn't help with all that. So I don't have cleanest number. I spent

20 quid having mine taken and sorted out for me and brought back in Edinburgh. Do you take it to the laundrette then? Well I did want the other year before but this year I found I hate ironing.com and a lovely man picked it up for me a big bag. Is that my wife? What did you do?

Do you take it to... They picked it up and for 20 quid. No, that's good. I think that was pretty good isn't it? Frank, would you be prepared? He would spend that. I'm just worried they'd put my stuff straight on eBay. Oh, Frank, come on. Who's going to want your old tired old pants? Anyway, I've started throwing out the ones with holes in there.

Pants and socks. I used to, I used to. You know, that's what most of us do normally. At regular intervals throughout our lives as adults. Yeah, I've first appeared with my. What's the oldest pair of pants or socks do you have, do you reckon? Great question. I have got pants.

are... Well, you know those ones that David Gandhi sent me? When was that? I think you'll find it's Mahatma Gandhi. Yeah. It was, he didn't wear a fan? In 1936.

I couldn't wear one of those big things. I think you'll find I asked him to send them to you. I was concerned about. They're the new wave of my... They're my latest past. David Gandhi, well, that was when I went on the private jet to Montenegro with him. That will be, you're looking at around 2015.

Those are 10 years... with Gandhi? Yeah. That's so cool. Not my hat, ma. Oh, David Gandhi. Yeah. You mean, Gandhi?

Gandy. How old do you think I am? Excuse me, Frank. When was he assassinated? Look, I don't know anything about it. I've had this conversation with the police. David Gandhi's way now, is there, yeah. David Gandhi?

Sent me a load of underwear. Yeah. Unfortunately, it wasn't his. No. It was his brand. He said to me. I've got underwear that's 25 years old. He likes you and he said, oh, do you Frank want some of my pants?

I might have said I'm concerned about your pants situation. He sent me some T-shirts. What a nice man. He's lovely. Very. You know which one he is in the Dolceinka banner? Oh, he's beautiful. Yeah, yeah.

He is, he is beautiful. He's a charming man. So what my tradie looks like, David Gandhi. Yes he? No, not really. He looks like Lionel Messi a little bit. Just so, you know, Mahat McCamty. He does look a bit like Lionel Messi, yeah.

Mahat McCampy. Who'd have thought Lionel Messi and Tim. him Vine would get together. Fuck. Just so you know, Katie, Mahamagandi died in 1948. So, just putting that out there,

you're literally thinking, presumably I had a friendship with him prior to his death. So you're suggesting that I got to know him sometimes in the early 40s. But him in mind, he was going to send me his underwear. So I'm in on this as well. You are as well.

So that means, He was born in 1869 as contemporaries. Frank and I would have actually been born in the 1860s or 70s, okay? Gandhi lives on. Can he see that old? Gandy lived. I know he's dead. He was born in 1869.

But he died. He was killed, wasn't he? So he wasn't like he was an old. I don't know. How old was he? He died in 1948. So that seems a long time he lived, longer than I would have thought. isn't it?

I don't know. Anyway, let's not dwell on the death of Gander. We're not dwelling. I just want to establish when Katie thought we were alive. I just want it made clear that Katie thought I was wandering around making friendships in the 1940s. Anyway. The first ever underwear model called Gandy. Was that you kissing that soldier?

Yeah. Anyway, I... They painted you on the side of planes during the war, didn't they? So I thought I'd worked it out. the washing machine. Oh, yeah. And I ended up washing my clothes for three hours and 15 minutes, which I think is more than you need.

It's terrible for the environment, Frank. I know. What temperature did you put it on, but it was 60? Who knows. How many more holes did you have in the pants when you'd... Well, no, they seemed all right. So I thought, but they were soaking wet, utterly soaking wet. I thought it just dried at the end of the wash.

It's been a cycle, you mean? Yeah. Yeah, it didn't do that. So they were soaking wet. So I changed all the things so it said dryer and press the bottom and I washed them for another three hours and 15 minutes. I would say it was easier to put together

an hour of stand-up comedy in Edinburgh than to wash four T-shirts, six pairs of pants, six pairs of socks. You're like one of those joke adverts about the incapable hopeless man. I know, I know, and I hate being that. Of course. Are you good, are you good, like, cooking and stuff like that?

No. No. He can't do anything around the house. Oh, really? But you know what? He is charming company and lovely to have around. Yeah. And that makes up for a lot, Frank.

Can you drive? Yes, I can drive. And he's also, I would describe you as a very sensible driver. If that's not offensive. Well, a friend of mine said that I drove like a pensioner. And we went to the pub and he kept saying, yeah, he drives like a, but I've just been with him in the car. This is my mate from back home.

I was at school with. And eventually I got so pissed off. And I said, OK, so I don't have a complaint. Remember, I've got a lot more to lose than you have. What does he say? He didn't like it. I mean, I thought, why can he ever go up me?

And then I can't respond. Yeah, I know. Anyway. Friendship's hard, Frank. Yeah, well, that one's, I think, are gone now. Frank, you don't need to say that. That one has gone now. Yeah.

What only one of you been up to while I've been away, Emily Dean? While the Catman, copyright David Biddle, was away. The Mice played. The Mice played. I went to Devon. Lovely. I went to stay, I went away to stay for a little mini break with my friend Connie Huck, who Frank calls the Incredible Hark.

Which she's comfortable with, in fairness. I've run it past her. She's not... I think it, you know, it's a compliment. And her husband, she's married to Charlie Brooker. The first thing I will say when you go to Devon is that it's useful to establish which Devon do you mean? Because there's, oh, we were talking about driving on the last podcast.

There's four hours and then there's like you've driven to Adelaide. Do you know that Devon I'm talking about? I'm from Somersets. My mom's in Devon. Well, there you go. You'll be familiar with this as well, Frank. It was exhausting. It was so exhausting that journey. So you're very south, very south.

I don't know where this space is. are I just follow the ways. Well, that's why they had their own language and everything. It's a long way. Oh, is that right? Yeah, and their own flag. Well, no one told me any of this when they said Devon. I was thinking three and a half four and maybe a nice T-based service,

even though that's in the other direction. Don't they put Devon flags halfway on the lamppost in Devon? What are the right doing Devon? Which flag do they go for? The Nigel Farage ones? Yeah, what did they do? I've no idea. I know.

Well, we were staying, I tell you who else was there, was Adam Kay. Are you familiar with Adam Kay? The writer. Yes, and comedian. Yes. And you're a fan of Adams, aren't you? You like Adam. I am.

It's all right. You don't have to run it by me. No, I'm just saying because it's been on this podcast. He's a very nice human being. And his husband, James. And you may remember I was telling Frank recently about their son, who's been beautifully brought up. So he's been trained to say no thank you to everything. And you remember me telling you,

Frank that sometimes it sort of backfires a bit because you'll go and sit down next to him and say hello there what are you up to and he says no thank you yeah and then similarly I would start an anecdote once and saying well a really funny thing happened to me

do you know my doggy he'll hold his hand up and say no thank you that is that strict which I love we could all learn from that I said to Adam I think Frank would approve of this he's his toddler So what's that, two, three, is that, Frank?

I thought you meant he was like 18. No, he's two or three. And I was like, that would be neurodivergent. He's about two or three. He says, no, thank you. So I was kind of half expecting him to be standing there when I pulled up at the house with my car saying, no, thank you.

But he didn't do that. You had to drive straight back from Devon. And I'd respect him. Have they got 5G yet? Devin? Yeah. No. Do you know what?

Frank. Josh Whittaker tell me that they hadn't got 5G I lost He definitely doing some places He's right

There was no I lost signal I couldn't get there I had to pull over and there was no My satinavs not working No weighs nothing Anyway

The son wasn't saying No thank you But their daughter Who's equally lovely and polite She did say something I found interesting James said

You remember Emily Don't you Now I worry When they say that Because children are very honest. I don't know if you ever had this with bars, but they can say, no. I don't know who she is. I once had a friend's son. He said, do you remember Emily, a university friend of mine? And he said, nope, and I've never even heard of her. Why say that? Just saying

no. No, once the Nile thing, you don't have to hit it flat against the surface. But why did he say I've never even heard of her saying, my father hates you, you mean nothing in our house? I knew she wouldn't go that far. But what she did so, I wonder what? what you two thought of this. She said, do you remember Emily? She said, yes, I do remember her, but she had a very different style back then. What, and how old is she? Wow. About four. She had a very different style back then. This was a year ago. What were you wearing? I think she meant she's aged. It's what she either meant. Or she might have meant she wasn't wearing makeup then, and she looks better now. I don't know. She couldn't have made. She had a very different style

back then. Long is you. Get your hair up or something? I don't know. Wellie, do we wearing wellies? Have you seen me? No. Can I ask you both this question?

And this is something you might be able to help with. I don't know what you think of this. I struggled with one thing, which is that I decided, Charlie took us all out for a very generous lunch, picked up the tab. I thought, well, I've got to give back a bit. Fantastic.

I've got to give back a bit. I'll do the sort of nice, glamorous auntie gesture. I'll offer to get the ice creams on the beach, nice and cheap. But there's still a big gesture for the kids. I go to get the ice creams. And here's the thing I hadn't factored in. You'll be used to this, Frank, because you travel in a big family gang. It's expensive.

It's expensive getting the gang prices, isn't it? Yeah, of course it is. Well, you say, of course. I've got no experience of this. So I go to pay for the ice creams. And everyone's giving me their orders, and I said how much. And I'm sort of magnanimously clutching my £20 note, keep the change. and he says that's 43 pounds.

Yeah. Artis and Old Devon ice cream. Was it, yeah, it was like, Gilles. 43 pounds? Can't put a price on happiness. Was that with cones, Sons, cones? I could get a Dior serum for that. I couldn't believe it.

And I went, I'm sorry. You went, yeah, it's 43 pounds. I said, are you sure? He said, yeah, I'm sure. They're all standing around. I've had a few things just lately when I've asked the person, have you? I've asked them to check the price.

It's embarrassing, isn't it? And what have they said? It's not that embarrassing. Oh, you don't find it embarrassing. No, at least I can sleep when I get home. Well, if it's been checked. But I think what I struggle with, I mean, I was shocked. I didn't think this was a Chase Bank account type of transaction.

I thought this was throwing some cash, you know. But I did think afterwards, I just thought, first of it, it's never occurred to me how expensive children are, just socially, I think. And I felt for you on that front. Oh, that's all right. I know you're a millionaire and it's worth it. Oh, don't bring that off.

But the trouble is... People can forgive you anything except that. Oh, dear, well, that's awkward. The trouble is, Frank, they're never going to pay you back with the friends' kids. They pay you back every day. Oh, God. Well, not your friends' kids, don't. Well, they pay you back by not coming around.

They don't put their hands in the Pepegook. What you're buying is their absence. Is that what it is? Yeah. Don't you wish you could just hit skip on the worst parts of your life? You know, the same way you can skip an ad? I get it. I'm Siyaya and I live in Ice Cove.

I've made some questionable decisions that didn't end up the way I planned. And today, I'm still figuring it out. Somehow things usually get worse before they get better. Apparently, that's how I roll. So bundle up and come along for the bumpy ride. Stream a new episode of North of North Tuesdays on CBC Gem. Are you the sort of... This one's on me, person.

I know, I'm very generous. Are you? Definitely, yeah. And I think it comes back. I love that. I'm always very generous with everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, okay, I'll bear that in mind.

But, but I mean, within reason, like, if I didn't have 43 quid in my bank account, I wouldn't be buying everyone ice creams. I was happy to do it. I think it just shocked me that I've got quite selfish where I just think, oh, I'll have a couple of your ice creams. If it makes you feel any better, I got the train back from Edinburgh

on three days ago and everyone was saying oh God the trains are all getting cancelled and all that. Kath and Boz had come up to see me their train. They got on a train four hours later than the one they were supposed to be on

so it was a nightmare. Anyway, my train was there waiting perfectly on time. It was something like four minutes late, perfect, went to get the tube and they weren't running. I ended up getting a cab. Black cab or Uber?

Black cab. From the station. Yeah. It can be expensive. This is Kings Cross to my house. I'd say I could walk it in 45 minutes. I'm going to predict. Yeah, I wouldn't predict a very high there.

60 quid? No, not that bad. I would have predicted. No, you've done that thing that people do. When you go high and you've killed the anecdote. I would have predicted it. Guess how much I paid for this shirt in Oxford? Yeah.

Two quid. So you've only got to go through Kings Cross. Kings Cross and Camden essentially. So I'm going to say. for that, I'm going to predict about £16. £31, £40. And do you know, I would say it's poisoned the next 48 hours of my life. Did it really?

The £31.40? Yeah. Did you tip? Well, you sort of got to give that two quid thing comes up. Oh, by then. And you have to watch it as well, watch it. Fuck on the meat. Rob your fucking nose in it.

I think that's the worst. See, that's the thing about certain cab apps, which we can't name because we get in trouble with black cab drivers. They don't like it. But at least you know from the outset. I once got an Uber from Paddington to, instead of the postcode, I put the street name. I just moved to London, didn't know that there were more than one street names.

Went all the way to South East London when I wanted to go to Southwest London. Got there and then he just dropped me there and I said, aren't I in acting? And I was in like Siddenum or something. Oh, no. I can't bear these stories. Yeah, that was very much like moving to London, you know. Well, look, though, I'm not the bloke did, you know, he did the room.

No, he did the right thing. He didn't do anything, don't you. I just, I can't live with spending. I always think how many books I could have bought with that money. Do you? Yeah, that's my thing. In the old, I used to think, pints. Well, you also would think ukulele's, things like that.

How much is a ukulele nowadays? Well, the one I currently play is a 19-0. 20s, Gibson. Yeah, so Gandhi and I have got one of those together. Yeah. It was, I'd like to have seen Gandhi playing the ukulele. We bonded over that one when it came out.

But it was just under a thousand pounds. Wow. The ukulele are more expensive than ice cream. It's in Denver. I thought you'd say it's a bit of that. So would I. You can get them that thing. I'm out of touch with prices, though.

This is what people pay. Listen, there's something I want to run by you. Come on then. I was in Roman Catholic Mass. Lovely. And the priest started talking about miracles. And he said some of the miracles, many of the miracles you get in the Bible. They're not just to help people out.

They're there as a sign to sort of teach them. people, you know, to bring them in. They're like a sort of a PR thing, really. Right. You do that. Everyone gets talking and then they get interested in that what's going on, the religion in general, which I thought was fair enough. And he said the Latin word for those kind of miracles that are done to attract people

is mirabilis. And I thought, okay. He said, so what I do now, he said, I like to remind myself. that that's what miracles are for. He said, so I don't say miracles anymore. I say mirables. Oh. And I thought, is this serious?

Is it going to be a strictly come down to you, on the way? And he stopped with it, and he kept saying mirables. He said mirables about six times. To the point they lost all meaning. And I thought, no, it was funny every time, I thought.

And I was just, I was working. I was looking on my work in progress show. And I thought, is this a work in progress thing? He thought, I'm going to try this mirableness thing. Just create a new word. Yeah. He's going to see how it lands and then decide whether to work it into the routine. But he didn't, he wasn't, you know, this is a Catholic church, not Church of England.

You know, he's not one of these that arrived on a motorbike. He was a very serious sort of. He didn't have a ventriloquished. This was in Edinburgh, was it? No, no, this was just before I left in London. But it's nagged at me. So, when we got a... Is it intentional? Is that what you're trying to work? He wasn't trying to get laughs. I think he was

hoping that we would go away and say, I believe in miracles. Where are you from? You're sex with it? Oh no. You can't say sexy. You can't say that. Forgive me, father. Would I call him father? Yeah, he could call him father. Is he the same father you see all the time? No, no, this was a new guy. Like I say, I think he was doing a work in progress. My favourite was, sorry. New material night. I liked it when, was it, Maura Higgins was in I'm a Celebrity,

and she kept calling Rev Richard Cole's father. I found that so lovely. Father, father. Yeah, she kept saying that. I found that really sweet. That would make sense. So what are you going to do? What about miracles?

With miracles. I'm leaving it. I'm not running with it. And so he's basically saying that a miracle is a mirable. Are you saying, in order to bring in the Latin, which tells you what a miracle is for, It's not just showing off that we should call them miracles.

But imagine every time you bring it up, you'd have to explain all that lot. You've got to quote the Latin. It's a mirable. And everyone will be like, don't you mean miracle? And that would be really straight. And I'll say no. I mean mirable. There are some words that I've been saying wrong my whole life.

Are there? Some of them, I like that. It's embarrassing. Go on. I've got it with something like this. You know, fruition. I used to say until last year, fruitition. Okay.

I like a fruitition. Yeah, but I've never used it in my conclusion, so I said something like, you know, it's not really coming to fruitition yet. And they were like, what? I like that. They were like fruition. If I've only ever read it on a page,

another one is a name. Go on. Persephone, I used to think, was Persephone. I've never met a Persephone. I think that's understandable. If you've not met, the names can be tricky if you've not met someone with that name. Sciapan?

Cyaphan. Chavon. Oh, right. Did you actually say, Syoban? No, I would never say, Zyoban. No, I used to read it like that, I think, and then in my head. I agree with you. Because when I was growing up, banana-rama were huge.

You'll remember them, Frank. Of course. And one of them is called... In fact, I used to get bananas from my fruitition. Did you? Yeah. I thought you were going to say, you used to say it like, banana-rama. Well, that's an absolute mirableness.

Yeah. I would say... Mirable. Yeah, mirable. I would have called her Siaban because I would see that name and not understand and I would say, oh, it must be Siaband. It was only when I encountered Sivon's that I would know.

Yes. Anything you've mispronounced? I can think of one. I wouldn't say he doesn't mispronounce very rarely, but there are some odd emphasis. Go on, like? I can't say it because you know what I'm talking about. Oh really?

Star Wars. What is the film, yes, with R2D2? in it. Star Wars? He's saying it a bit more properly. He says Star Wars. Oh, so the emphasis on the wrong way.

And he says, the reason I emphasise this is because it should be, it's wars between you're giving the correct emphasis. My argument is there are many star things and that one, Star Man, Starfish

and that's just Star Wars. Whereas I would say... That's quite strange. You would say that. I love you. Stick around. Star Wars. Whereas I say,

Star Wars? Star Wars. Thank you. Thank you, Persephone. I appreciate your contribution. Perciphone. I can't like that as a name. Persephone, I know. You can't have got anything wrong. I don't think that's true. Oh, come on. You probably have. Pronunciation pronunciation wise.

Is there anything that you're conscious that you, I think maybe names I have probably got wrong in the past? The thing is it almost strikes me that sometimes you get people that say, word differently. And a word that you think they must have heard loads and loads of times. And that I don't, that's just a stubborn belief that they're pronouncing. But sometimes it can be revealing, like, when I was at school and I'd come back having lived in Australia, someone said, oh, you must meet Victoria. She told her she lived in Australia. I thought the use of told us was interesting. Because when I encountered Victoria, she kept

sort of avoiding me. And I eventually did pin her down. I said, sorry, everyone keeps saying we should meet because I grew up in Australia. Where did you live? And she looked very sheepish and went, um, uh, sidney. Oh, no.

Oh, bless her. So she was a liar. She was wise to look cheapish. Sidney. To suggest you lived in Australia. Sidney. But she said sidney because back then they didn't have chat GPT to say,

look, chat GPT, I've told a terrible liar at school. Yeah. How do you pronounce it? It was sad, isn't it? It's not bad. Side knee. I'm already over it, I'll be honest. Oh, poor girl.

I'll tell you what I don't think you are over. Silverfish from what I've been hearing. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah, this came up in Edinburgh, but I was... Did you hear about this? No one ever explained to me what it meant. Well, I was talking about... When I was growing up, if you got up in the night and put the light on,

the floor would be covered in silverfish. which are these insects that look a bit like tiny fish. And they really do. They look like anchovies. And they'd all scurry back into their secret corners. So the light would catch them. You know, it was a beautiful thing to say. They were being shoals.

And you don't get them so much anymore, I believe, because of central heating. Well, I don't know. See, I can't remember who I was on the show with. I think it was Sarah Bauer and Finley Christie and they had never even heard of them. Have you heard of them, Katie? Yeah, it's hard to think that's generational because I thought they were still around.

I need hardly point out that I've heard of them. No, exactly. Well, I think Gandhi's house was absolutely running with them. Do you know what? I'd just go so far as to those the Gandis were riddled with Silverfish. Is it something that parents would say to stop you getting out of bed or something?

No, you would just say. I'll see them. I'll tell you where I would see them often is in an empty dry bathtub. I've never seen them. Is it real? Possibly. Yeah. They're being a bit cagey, possibly. They're quite expect. I mean, they're not massive. I'm going to Google this. They look like, exactly like you've said.

Did you say anchovies or something? I'm going to catch one and I'm going to put it in a massive glass case. You can't really catch one. You know how you put like a giant pike in a glass case? I'm going to put a tiny minuscule. Silverfish. Billy Bass? Yes. Do you want to... Big mouth, Billy Bass.

Does that ring any bells, Katie? Oh, Billy... My taxi driver had one in the car. Why were they so big? Was there like a 10-year period? Had one in the car? Yeah. So when I used to have a taxi driver

to go to primary school and he'd have one in the car. Hang on, I need to know about this. This is like little... What was the song this? The fish sang. He used to sing, don't worry. Don't be happy. Be happy. Yeah, yeah. We loved it.

And then do you remember that there was a dance? there was a dancing daffodil or flower? Oh yeah, I remember that. Why did this happen? Why in that particular period? They were very clever. If you played music to those flowers, they'd start dancing. I mean, how did they do that?

But why did dancing flower and Big Mouth Bully Bass all take off and now we will never speak of them again? We don't see them anymore. Well, they're very expensive, the vintage now, obviously. Vintage Bass. Yeah. Do you want to know about the silver fish? I never had a Big Mouth Billy Bass, but I want to. I once went into John Prescott's Whitehall office, and he had one over his desk.

That's cool. I mean, I did not see that coming at the end of that anecdote. Do you wish to know about silverfish? Yes. Okay. A number of people have got in touch with us on the gram. Lots of silverfish, exclamation mark. Idleweiler says the silverfish ignorance will not stand.

These youngens need a skinner education, drastic surge. I had one in my bathroom sink the other day. I hadn't seen one since the 80s. Okay, they're coming back. Yeah. Michael Milton. Don't know if he's a relative. He messaged me.

He proposed to me in my DMs and told me like Jim Vine. Michael Milton. But is that his name or is he a sham, Milton? Yeah. Paradise Lost. Yeah, that could be for you. Yeah.

Found two in a picture frame this year. Two silver-fishing in a picture. What I'm on about the giant pike. Took me right back to the 70s and exactly as Frank says, turning on the light and the bathroom floor being alive with them. Yeah.

Michael Milton says alive. The floor was alive with them. It's a good description. Okay. But what do you expect from Milton? And Johnny Olly 666. Sorry, you'll never be friends with Frank. Johnny Olly, do?

Yeah. But the 660s. 66 is always going to be a problem for you. Had silverfish in the downstairs toilet last summer, they are still around, they just hide now. They always hear. Is there a photo of them anywhere? What should I do after?

I like that you were leaving towards me, like it would be my screen save. You and Gandhi on my phone. Yeah, she was just checking your earrings. Have you got a photo of you with a silverfish? Yeah, there's me landing one in my living room. I mean, the picture I'm just seeing it, I'm currently showing a picture. I would say, Frank, this causes them to look more impressive than they are.

I don't think I've ever seen one, you know. Well, they don't, they look much. They're much smaller. They live in the wood and stuff. They live underneath skirting boards and things like that. Wow, I reckon I'll have some in my flat in London. But it's like Toy Story. You have to burst in quickly and then they all have to, you know, on Toy Story,

they all have to suddenly fall over. Yeah. It's, I know, because. Or the secret life of pets, Frank. Have you seen that? Yes. When the owners can't, they have to pretend they can't talk and they're just silly animals.

Yeah, well, Buzz has got a Buzz light year. Of course he does. That if you, if you, I think you have to shout or something, he falls over immediately. Oh, really? Yeah, it's very clever. I like that. So it's like that.

As soon as you go into the room, the Silverfish disappears. So that's why people think they don't exist. I've got so many spiders in my flats. Oh, God, don't tell me that. I couldn't live in a flat. that I had so many spiders. Oh yes, you're funny about spiders, aren't you? No likey.

Oh dear. No spider, no likey. We had several people writing in as well, delighted to see that you're in the top 10 countries, top comedians or something, do you know about this? No. Okay. Well, you were.

Congratulations well, though. Great news. Oh, that's great. And then we've also, have we got time for one more or we could wrap it up? No, go on, do one more? As I believe Meg Ryan said to Michael Parkinson, do you remember that? she tried to... Did you ever see...

Have you ever seen clips that Frank will tell you? It's a terrible awkward. Do you know Meg Ryan the actress? Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's on and she really doesn't want to be on. And also Michael Parkinson's whole style with attractive women was incredibly flirty interviews. She was an affidney.

And it was just a really awkward, difficult thing. And then she said... He says, what would you... He goes, oh, you don't want to answer these questions. If you were me, what would you suggest now? And she says, I think wrap it up. Yeah, it was great.

I love that. We did love it. But I like that they kept that in, Frank. That was quite a skinarian. I'm going to call it a diskinarian edit choice. I don't think they kept him in telling me off for speaking to a rowing. Do you know that? He got told off.

Let's finish with that because I do enjoy that. I was on and it wasn't Steve Reddraith. Matthew Pinsent was on, the Rower. Olympic gold medalist. And Parkinson was asking me, he was already pissed off because he asked me about my battle with the bottle.

And it was one of these when the cameras goes in tight and I'm supposed to be tears in my eyes. And you said. And I said, well, it was great. I said, I didn't become an alcoholic

because it was terrible. It became one because it was great. I said, and I've never, you know, I never laughed like that anymore and stuff. He didn't like that. He didn't want any of that.

He wanted Ernest. So then he had, asked me something and I said to Steve Pins, I said, well, you must find this. And he said, are you talking to him or doing the interview? I said, well, why is he here then? Why do you have us all on together?

That was really. I love that you had an argument with that. But that's such a weird thing to say. If you're doing a chat show with more than one guest on, then I'm allowed to speak to each other. I know. When was this?

Oh, 1948. Gandhi was on the sofa He sat on the floor You know what he's like He always had to do In his lingerie Mo and I had a great time that night Yeah

Mo Did he do the MoBot? Oh man He never touched a fucking thing In the green room Which one? Who Mahatma? Gandhi never touched

The hospitality I didn't know He was... Anyway, look, Radio Dase is back on Wednesdays, 2014 and the team chat football headlines and I have an action figure. Oh, yes. I don't remember that.

I've got several actions. I do well do. What of yourself? I have got a couple... He's got Parkinson's doll. I have got an action figure. I've got like an action man of me. So it's got the big head and everything.

Okay, we won't ask about any other parts of the anatomy. No, it doesn't have anything there. You know what action men are like, which is the title of my new song. You know what action men are like. That's why they're so comfortable on a bike. Go on. Sorry, Katie. It was lovely.

Katie, thank you so much. Thank you for having me back. Can we do one last plug for your show? because I want people to see because they'll thank me for it and I like to be thanked. No, they can come along it's going to be on the 14th September

at Soho Theatre for a week. Katie Norris. Please come. I will be. I'll sort you out with a comp. And Mike Milton get in touch. Wait. You shouldn't have said that.

He's so going to be in touch. Oh, goodness me. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. A new winter change is blowing. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. I'm not totally sure how it's going. Thanks for listening to the podcast. Make sure to like and follow so you never miss an episode.

And if you want to get in touch, you can email the podcast via Frank Off the Radio at Avalonuk. calm.