The Frank Skinner Show - Brass Rubbing

Episode Date: September 29, 2025

Frank's still unwell so we're working from home again this time. Frank has been featured in an unusual magazine, Emily's hairdresser has got the wrong end of the stick with an Instagram video and there's more from the Outside World. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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including Rachel Maddow Ketouru Isaku and Kieran Desai the Toronto International Festival of Authors October 29th to November 2nd details and tickets at festival Festival of Authors.com.ca. It's Frank off the radio, featuring him and that posh lady oh, and the one with the French name from South Africa came. They're all here open brackets, array, close brackets today. Yes, I've still got COVID. And this is Frank off the radio.

by Emily Dean and Pierre Novella. You can follow us on X and Instagram and you can email us on Frank Offter Radio at Avalonuk.com. And as for WhatsApp, Oh, 7457, 417, 7, 6.9. Oh, 7, 45, 7, 417, 7, 6.9. So that was that.

I am, hello guys. We're not together, so I'm just seeing these guys on the screen. I'm definitely one of my lines is getting fainter. Okay. Do you remember the COVID test? I know it seems like something from yesterday. But I started off with two sturdy, the sort of things that a gymnast could have worked with, two parallel bars.

And now one of them is looking like a ghost bar. So I think I'm on, I'm on my way back into the real world. I like your COVID wear, because I'm looking at you on screen. And I'm very intrigued by what people wear when they're ill. And what interests me about you is. That's a great thing to be intrigued by. Yeah, because what interests me about you is, you know, I use it as an excuse to pull the rip cord, quite frankly,

And start dressing from the I have given up shot. Not Frank. You look, you've got, it looks to be some sort of polo shirt. You look very clean and well-kempt. Yeah, it's a bit Steve Hall chic. He favours a polo. One for the regulars. Yeah, one for the regulars.

Yeah, I'm sure they know Steve Hall. Just trust me, where's a lot of polo shirts. Yeah. Yeah, it's a bit of a comedian's thing, wouldn't you say? Pierre the polo shirt I can think of a few it's because they all sort of like the jam and blur

and stuff like that yeah and I think it's a useful middle ground between going full button up shirt I'm going on have I gotten used for you and full dressed down Russell Howard Norty's T-shirt zone it's the friendly middle ground between those two

I think it's also saying I'm vaguely left wing but you know I'm not a It's kind of, it's a sort of middle-class left-wing thing. Oh, okay. But that's not a bad thing, Frank. That's, you know, that's the dream. No, look, I'm glad to be analyzed thus.

By the way, just before I went into exile through COVID-25, I was interviewed by the popular magazine, Arimus. Do you know it? No, I'm afraid I don't. I'm really sorry. When I say it's popular, it's popular in a sort of tight group of Anglicans because it is the official magazine of Westminster Abbey. That aramis.

I was going to say, I think I've missed the September issue. What are they suggesting I wear for fall? I mean... I think sensible flat shoes, flesh-colored tights. This week, cassocks. Are they all they're cracked up to be? Never mind the cassocks they'd call it, wouldn't I? Isn't that what they call the article? Yeah.

Anyway, it was... I mean, the exciting thing about it is the Dean, who's a very... Very nice man, I must say, the Dean of Westminster Abbey, we've, we've spent time to, he gave me a tour once of the Abbey, a personal tour, which was exciting. And in this, we had a photo shoot in Poets Corner, which was great. Poets Corner is one of those places that, in a way, the less you know about it, the better. Why? Well, for a start off, not every stove. means that the person is there.

Oh, some are just sort of commemorative, are they? Some are commemorative, yeah. And then some of them are the actual graves. Some, you can generally tell by the size of the stone. So if it's sort of, you know, a six foot by three foot stone, it means they're down there. Right. If it's a sort of three foot square,

it could be their ashes. Yeah. I think with Thomas Hardy, it's, I think it might just be, it's only one part of him. Yeah, Ben Johnson is actually standing up in it, so that's slightly deceptive. That saves room. Yeah. For how long, though, really? Edmund Spencer wrote The Fairy Queen.

They don't know where he is. As the Dean said, he's down there somewhere. It's a bit, but some of it's the, what they need. is a sort of, do you ever play battleships? You used to have that greed. That's what, if they had done that a long time ago, it would have been really helpful. Yeah.

So some of them are just stones and some of them are actual dead body. It's a bit like deal or no deal. You don't know quite what you're going to get. The other shock that I had which, which Bloom our man is that brass robbing, is now not allowed. That's for Borten. Yeah, in case you aren't new to brass robin. What you could do,

there are brass plates and have like fabulous pictures of you know, nights in armour. We did it all the time when I was younger. Yeah, and you just take a crayon or a bit of charcoal paper and you could rob it and have a lovely outline, but it's been stopped.

I have to say, Frank, I don't think we use charcoal, but yeah. You could use crayon. Yeah, we favoured the crayon. So why has it been stopped? Is that because it's affecting? Well, is political correctness gone mad? I don't think, I don't know if Nick Ferrari is going to be slamming his fists over brass rubbing anytime soon.

They're ruining, ruining our cunt, killing your own countries. You can't take a brass rubbing anymore, folks. Very sad. I've got a beautiful collection. They're taking everything. They're taking our brass robbing's now. Yeah, well, apparently it does damage to the brass plate. Oh, does it?

It's so popular for us. There's such a craze of it that, I mean, it's just taking the brass away. It's the new Lububoos. Is it still very popular, do you think? Well, no, because you can't do it. No, but leading. up to that decision how often was it done i don't know i mean i i forgot it existed it's only when i was in there i said to the dean oh that'd be a nice brass robin he said well i you know don't get any

big ideas you come in here robin they're trying to get ahead of the they're trying to get ahead of the shiny tit game that the statues have suffered from yes there is a bit of that you too i don't mind um In, I think, Westminster Cathedral, there's, I think it might be St. Peter, who's got a very shiny foot that everyone touches. Of course, in comedy terms, the most famous shiny statue is the mausel of Greyfriars Bobby. Yes. Yes. Which has been robbed golden. But also, and I went there recently, I think one of our readers noticed the same thing. I went to take a picture and there was just so much we, we were.

there. It's surrounded by human wee-wee. Oh, I thought you were blaming Robert? But that that's the Robert, as his mother called him. That's the grave as opposed to the statue because the statue's next to a main road. Yes, the statue. Oh, sorry. I haven't been to the grave.

You know, it's a dog. Oh, fun. No, it's the dog's master. Until it's your dog, can I say. Oh, it's the dog's master. The dog's master, because that's where, that's where he hung out, you see. Yes, of course. I'm not going to do my old material on it. No, please don't.

I will find it upsetting. So I said to the dean, could I just, we did the thing, we did the interview and it was nice. And it's great hanging out in Westminster Abbey. Do you know what I mean? Did the dean do a photo shoot? out of interest. Me and the Dean, the Dean and I, as I think 10 CC called it. He didn't do a photo shoot. No, we weren't doing selfies. Okay. Was there a stylist or like Mayhara makeup? Um, no. Okay. There was an official photographer though. We just weren't just

using our phones. How, um, how many instructions were you given? Sexier. Now do a tiger. Are they doing any of that kind of photography stuff to get you to pose better? No. they'd give us the odd note but basically can you just get a little bit closer to w horden and all the things i never heard working in fashion for 15 years anyway um i said to the dean can i use the toilet before i go he said oh you can use our crapper i thought that's a slightly common talk from the dean but he was he was literal have you You heard of Thomas Crapper, who made toilets? Well, they've got one. They've got an original crapper. No, really, it's got his name. I know. It's great, great to have that on Antiques Roadshow.

Well, I took a photo, actually. I'll put it on our social media thing. But I went in there, and it looks like an old toilet. To be honest, there's a lot of, I looked into Thomas Crapper. I bet you did. You went there a long time, were you? No, the man rather than the toilet. Because I always assumed that he patented the flush toilet. That was my... Do you know who that was?

Kit Harrington's ancestor. Kit Harrington, the star of Game of Thrones. I know you didn't watch Game of Thrones, Frank, but he also starred in Troy. He... That was his great, great, great, great, whatever grandfather. Oh, yeah. Yes.

Yes. It was Jeremy Tird's gone. Oh my God. Please. Tim Vine already. Yeah. So Thomas Crapper actually patented the floating ballcock, which was my whole wrestling name. I don't know if you remember.

That was your safe word in the S&M community. The name of the toilet. is the venerable. That's what it's got on it. It's not. And I thought, I really hope they make B-Days. It's a marketing dream, Frank.

It is. Look, I'll send you a picture. I mean, it's in a way. You'll send me a picture of a toilet. After you'd been in there. No. No, before. I only went to We, for goodness sake.

Okay. It wouldn't be right to do anything else in the. the Westminster Abbey. No, so it was, I was intrigued by, but I'll send you a pick. There's something beautiful, it sort of sums up Victoriana more than you might imagine. Yes. I could imagine it being used by Arthur Conan Doyle, which is one of my rarer sexual fantasies, I think. It's a much worse two pipe problem.

Yeah, exactly. I suppose we have got two pipes. And that's what I used to say. Are you going for pipe one or pipe two? Well, I look forward to receiving the picture of the old toilet from you. Yeah, I wish you wouldn't call Kath that. I've told you before. Oh my God.

Frank, please. So look, what about the outside world? Yes. I ache for contact with them. I haven't seen much of the outside world for quite a while. No. Well, Sue from Petersfield has got in touch and she was very excited because she just saw that barking in East London is home to the capital's noisiest dogs.

This was information that was printed recently that the council has received 2,239 complaints about dogs barking, in barking, which is more than any other London borough. Does that qualify as nominative determinism? This is what she's saying. Can that apply to a borrower? Yeah. She's saying that I think it is in a way, isn't it? They're doing what they're instructed to by their hometown. They're living up to their reputation.

I enjoy that fact. It almost feels like some sort of rag week stunt. It's sort of unbelievable. Okay. I can't bear a barker, though. I'm so lucky my ratings make a noise. I can always barker. Yeah, our dog barks at, you know, the doorbell.

Yeah, but she only barks in a very manageable sitcom 17. sitcom way. No, she does that thing of like, there's poor prints on the window where she'll throw herself at the window. What we do is the local cats will just sit outside looking at her, knowing that they are safe. Yeah. Mm.

They're very smug. Yeah, but they're cruel. Taunting. They're really nasty creatures. Nasty creatures. Nasty creatures. David Bidil loves cats.

No, he does love cats. cats. I know. And they could be his. He's got about six. We've also heard from Tim from Kent. My nan used to have a saying which was, I haven't laughed so much since old leather ass died. Is this a phrase with which you were familiar? Well, as a child, I used to think, poor old leather ass. Who was leather ass? And what sort of person must he have been that people laughed at his demise? Yeah. I imagine he's one of those non-putrifying saints that they found in the catechisms they all look like they're made out of leather well yes yes yes or he's the tester for thomas crapper's inventions yes leather or maybe he was you know he just liked a bit

of action in old compton street yeah he was maybe he was one of the older guys in the s&m community oh leather else anyway my um my mate auger his dad you used to say, tells more lies than leather and arse. No. And I never knew what that meant. And I thought, tells more lies than leather or not. Does it mean that if, like some sort of patch on your trousers is a pretense of completeness? Well, Tim seems to have a theory.

Oh. Tim was so intrigued, as you would be if your grandmother kept referring to leather on. I mean, I wouldn't have been intrigued at all in my case. That was a Tuesday. But anyway, it says a Google search seems it could have started leather ass as an Irish saying referencing Oliver Cromwell's death. Not being known for being much fun and quite a killjoy. This seems appropriate.

Why was it? Did Oliver Cromwell? Was he leather ass? Well, I associate leather with fun. something I've learnt today I've never heard Cromwell called that I mean he would have worn I don't think he'd have worn any more leather than the average 17th century

like being on a horse all the time like he never stops going around on his horse killing people or something I'm trying to think from an Irish he had a neat name didn't he Cromwell did he I can't remember what it was there It was something like the thunderer, which I think was actually the Times. Yes, it was, wasn't it? Well, if anyone is an expert on leather, and by that, I don't mean you own a shot called The Art of Control. Or World of Leather.

In Soho. Or indeed, World of Leather. World of Leather. That would be the worst theme park. Anyone's. Oh, yeah, you get to go on a leather. roller coaster oh really um yeah so what about that yeah they're trying to kill the cat they want to kill all the cows did you hear that bit of this oh was it the cows hang on i heard there was the

swans as well and the dogs people are stealing carp in they say that people are stealing carp and swans from ponds no but trump was revealing to i think the methane gas thing right they don't want cows He said, they want to kill the cows. Yeah. He's obsessed with windmills as well. Oh, we went on a lot of dolphins. Yeah. Killing all the birds.

He's obsessed. Chinese, they want to sell. They sell the windmills. They don't want to use them themselves. My impression isn't as good as the peers. But he said, yeah, they love, oh, they love selling us the windmills, but they don't want to use them. Chinese, they're no better than that. They're know how horrible they are.

the great green scam used to call it global cooling i never remember that face used to call it global cooling then it was no they call it climate change you can't lose he's got it was brilliant he's addicted to sort of sub clauses he sort of descends through these subcloses till you forget where you started from because he'll start by saying it's nice we're here at the un and then he'll talk about how he could have done marble floors and then he'll say well actually a lot of marbles from Italy and Italy's doing really well because they don't have any windmills and then it'll be China and then oh well maybe it just it's like it's like a ADHD way of thinking which I quite like he said the UN never do anything like the

escalator stopped when we were on the escalator off the escalator it stopped and he said luckily luckily Millennia's in great shape she was able to walk up the oh she can do stairs And he said, I'm in great shape as well. I love that he's obsessed by people's shape. That's what he said to Kate. She's not Middleton anymore. Is she? She's not, she's not.

He's a beautiful woman, great looking, looking in great shape. So beautiful. It's such a weird thing. I'm sorry, but it really, for all the wrongness of it, it was absolutely one smash hit gag after the next. absolutely brilliant oh dear so we got um we got a follow-up from kath who started us down the road of um little dogs cock and a pickled onion oh yeah oh yeah kath from overhampton we should say they're two villages in leicestershire yeah again that that isn't a specialist interest shop in soho no it used to be a thing um that

if you said to someone what's for dinner they'd say a little dog's cock and a pickled onion. Yes. I know. Remember we didn't have Netflix then. We have to make our own entertainment. Kat says, Frank, Emily and Pierre, quick follow up. My mom and dad never swore.

So I had no idea that little dog's cock and a pickled onion was rude. When anticipating the sandwiches coming around at a family gathering, I innocently repeated this phrase and was treated like a celebrity with applause, cheers and laughter. I tried it out again at the next. I tried it out again at the next gathering, but my novelty value had worn off and not one of them laughed. Fickle and unfair. That's quite Trump-like. Fickle and unfair. But as you say, very like the life of a celebrity.

Yeah. What you just, you had it encapsulated into two events rather than spread it over many years. You know, it's interesting the parents were okay with it, though, if, uh, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, you know, it's interesting. the parents were okay with it though if if she swore it seems like sometimes swearing can sneak through in phrases i think that's true my parents never swore but i swear that they i swear that they did have a couple of phrases that might contain ruder than average ideas i think it's a good way of smuggling obscenity right they say stuff like in crossing the veldt was like leather ass they would say it complimentary about Bill Tong and other beef based snakes

we were only allowed we were allowed to swear in the context of Philip Larkin or any other sort of literature or poetry that was that sounds like your dad we didn't have swear my old man wouldn't allow swearing in wouldn't he I respect that Frank yeah then he'd go out and beat someone up on a pub car park which was fine apparently As long as he didn't swear while he was doing it. But what I love is when he was burning down the shed, he always worked clean. Yeah, exactly, exactly.

It was... Oh, killing the dog. When he burnt three sheds in the garden on top of each other, it was the whole family watched it because there's no smot. Can I, can you just remind me quickly, why did he burn the show? it's fine because no one in the family would take take him a bet so he wanted to put a bet on my mom wouldn't take him on my older brother I was too young to take one to the betting office and my dad's argument was if he went out the house he had to put

a suit on he wouldn't just go down in like you know he's working clothes so he had to put a suit on and he said once I put a suit on I'll have to get drunk. So he didn't, so he didn't go and then the horse is one. Oh and that's why he burnt a three sheds down. So he dragged three sheds into the middle of the garden and set fire to them. Yeah, which looking back, it's fair enough. I understand. I feel a deeper sense of empathy and understanding with that anger. Yeah. Another time here that the horse was watching the horse racing and And the telly went wonky, as they did in those days.

So we didn't see the end of the race. So he ripped the telly out the water, you know, the plug out the wall. And he stood on the step, on the back step. And he did like an official, because he used to play football a lot when he was a young man. He did a proper throw in. He held the telly in two hands, took it behind his head and threw it up the garden. Where those old tellies, they didn't explode. They imploded.

right so they sort of explode inwards and um but it was a rented television so my my mom then had to tell um the rental company that me and arcadio rentals yeah that me and our cath was sick and she was struggling not our cat i keith i was sick so she was struggling to carry the telly upstairs for our entertainment and fell and uh that's clearer yeah As Barbara Windsor once said, talking about Ronnie Knight, the lies I've told for that man. Anyway, different times. Frank, I want to tell you something that happened to me this week. I was chatting with my Brazilian hairdresser.

Does that mean he does your Brazilians? I knew you were going to say that, Frank. No, it's his nationality, not his job description, okay? Do people still, just as a sidebar? Do people still vejazzle or is that a sort of a 2010 thing? I don't think so. I think it's waned. I know what you mean.

It feels like that moment's past, doesn't it? Because it feels like it was part of, I think, well, it was, I hope most young women now would not want to do that, if you know what I mean. Well, the only way is Essex was when I first heard of it. Yeah. And I got the impression it was widespread, but obviously I don't do any. Don't use words like that, please.

No. I don't, um... So disgusting, Frank. I don't do any field work anymore, so I don't know whether that fashion has continued. No anthropological research out in brain train. No, no, so, I mean, I'm relying on you guys who are out in the world a bit more than I. I mean, I, you know, listen, I think people do all sorts of...

What I need to ask is a modern clown. Oh, but yes. OPS always tells us. Very promiscuous. The sexy clowns, absolutely. I think a lot of people still like to keep a relatively clean work surface. What I would say is that I think that fashion for Vajazzal hopefully has come to an end, I think. I don't think.

Would you agree, Pierre? I think it's so time-specific they'll use it in 30 years to show you that something is set in the 2010s. Yes. They'll say, God, this new strokes out. is great. I was listening to it during my jazzling and I couldn't stop on my iPod. So a film set in the 80s as someone carrying an enormous mobile phone the size of a coffee. Now it'll start with someone adding sequins to their Mons Venus. Yes.

Okay. And other things I wasn't expecting to hear on the pod this week. I'm not complaining, Frank. We're all adults. I'm something of a classicist. Yes And I love you for that So anyway You're with your Brazilian hairstyles My Brazilian hairdresser

Christian And he's been looking at my Instagram And he said He was commenting on some of the videos And he said I won't do the accent Because I don't think you can But you're getting the general impression

He's very I would describe him As very flamboyant And vivacious A Brazilian hairdresser Yeah. So, okay. And he says, I love those videos you do with that man. You're so cute together.

And I was a little confused. I said, I don't know what you mean, Christian. So I pulled out my phone to get him to show me what he meant. And he pointed at one of you, Frank, one of the videos we put up for this podcast. And he said, him, him, that man. I love it. It's so nice to watch you two together and your relationship. I mean, hang on, Christian.

We've been friends for a long time. This is my friend. He said, oh, I thought it was your boyfriend and you were doing little videos of your relationship. You were putting up online. Is he from Mars? I said, no. I said, he is a friend, but we do a podcast.

He said, but I thought this was a slice of life of your relationship together, how you talk to each other. I said, no, no, we're not in a relationship. When we hang out with headphones on? And I said, what did you think the other man was doing that? Well, exactly. What did you think was going on there? What was that? So then he said, he said, oh, I've made a mistake.

I'm so sorry. He said, well, I hope I'm not manifesting something. I said, no, you're not manifesting something. something. I've known this gentleman. I called you a gentleman. You know, because I wanted to sort of make it very clear there was a formality to our friendship. I said, I'm best friends with his partner. I've known him for over 35 years. You're not manifesting anything. Well, I went in. Sorry, my. No, no, carry on. And he said, well, what can I say? I can't help it. He said, I like to watch you together. Okay. Well, if the podcast files, we got that.

to fall back up. Was it only friends? Is that what it's called that thing? Only fans. Only fans. He thought we were just putting up videos of us together. I went into a cafe with a mate of mine and he went in there regularly.

And when he went in there with me, the owner was, oh, Mr. Skinner's so, oh, lovely to have you. Oh, I didn't know you knew Mr. And all that sort of stuff. And he said when he went to the toilet, that the guy around the cafe shook his hand and said, well done, you.

Just for knowing me. Oh, God. You know, my mom said, when she had first married my dad, she went to a party, and a woman came up to her and said, thank you for bringing him. Oh. Oh, that's quite a... I love thank you for bringing him.

So anyway, that was my incident with my hairdresser. I also just wanted to share something briefly with you. I was so shocked to hear about Shirley Ballas. Do you know she was rejected by Raya? I don't know what Raya is. Oh, OK, we can tell you. Do you know what it is, Pierre? It is a broadly speaking celebrity dating app.

It's a certain... Thank, if only you'd have had this when you were in that... When you were dating, it's the most exclusive dating app because I think Cara DeLavine's been on. Channing Tatum and the styles lad at one point Frank it's got a high it's got a lower admission rate than Oxford or Harvard only something like 8% of applicants are successful but it was an interesting thing I read because Shirley Ballas has been

rejected there's a waiting list of a hundred thousand but so has what they're all there aren't that many celebrities is everyone a celebrity on it John Thompson has been rejected as well. Goodness me. I know. That would have made life a lot easier. Well, you say that, but you can do a search for jobs. That's the problem on it. So they do a search for jobs and the most popular search for jobs on there is Formula One drivers. Really? Yeah. People want to go out with the men who drive around and round. That's what I don't understand. I'd search for a comic. Much not. At least don't wait you laugh. I don't know. See, I went to the British Grand Prix once. Oh, did you find? Yeah. Fucking hell that was tedious.

Honestly, you'd hear the car's coming so you put your ear plugs in and then they'd go past then you'd take your ear plugs out. Then you'd sit and then you'd hear the car's coming so you put your ear plugs in and when that had happened four times then you're in hospitality talking to Katie Price. That was my experience. I'd pay a great deal to avoid this. Yeah. Do you have to wear, is it really noisy then? Well, yeah, when they actually go past you, I think, you know, they said you must, it'll really hurt your ears if you let them go right past.

Why didn't they go to the people? I met Krista Burr in the pits. Is this still about Formula One? Early 90 story I've ever heard. We worked in a colliery together. Yeah, it was... But anyway, that's what they're searching for, but Shirley Ballas. I'm just really shocked by that, because I think she's, well, you know, she's got a few quid.

She's done well for it. Why would she not be allowed on Rhea? I don't think it existed in my day. No, but why would Shirley Ballas? In the 70s, a lot of the older male celebrities were on some sort of Martian date in her. By the way, if you haven't had the previous podcast, this is a reference to a film Franks all recently he's utterly obsessed by.

What, a message from Mars? It's called a message from Mars. And you should go back and listen to him talking about it on the last podcast because it is very funny, but I'm going to watch it now, Frank. I'll just say Martian morality is a little different from ours. Yeah, it's closer to Hollywood morality. Yes, it is.

And I love the fact they don't wear tunics though. And I do love a tunic on a Martian, you know, like with a colour. Oh, you've looked up, you've looked up the Martians to see what they look like. You've, you couldn't wait, could you, to watch the film? You've had to go searching still store. Yes, I will again recommend the message from Mars, 2013. No, 1913, sorry. Mad.

Mad to have a sci-fi film that early. Is that older than Napoleon? That film my dad made me watch when I was. I say it's not older than Napoleon. No, the film Napoleon, Abel Watts's face. Abel Gantz. Yeah, the silent one, Frank. I saw that.

I went to see that at the Triangle in Birmingham, which is an art center that I worked at. And more common in the 70s, of course. I like that we're making a Pajal joke whilst discussing the Abel Gantz, Napoleon. Yeah, so I think it's something like, six and a half hours long or something. I know, I'd say I had to go and see it

when I was a child at the end of the festival. I have to say, I watched it as a sort of, you know, you do some things just so you can tell people you've done them. Yeah. But it was great. I really enjoyed it. I'd recommend them.

I listen to a lot of tell. Well, I say listen. I watch a lot of telly now with the sound turned off. So it's all one. The only thing that I don't like with silent movies has got very sort of white skin and black lipstick. upset me yeah I'm not like that because I live quite near Camden it makes me feel at whole I'd love to see a goth and a Napoleon hat just to go a little bit more

1800s would be great I love a goth simple as that they're not afraid of a sort of admiral's uniform epaulettes sort of tunic you know my chemical romance maritime vibe it's not just maritime is it it's general military yeah marching band sort of costume and when you're talking about goths who are on the nautical step very good i don't know i can't think of them in uniform any goths listening if there's a war i don't know if they'd be in uniformed very bad i've stopped seven wars yeah very vague as well Are you vague? Is that what he said seven wars?

I looked up a list of the seven wars. He's been involved in talks and things. There's about four people who've recommended him for the Nobel Peace Prize. I'm going to recommend him just for the speech. The flaws at the UN. Yeah. There is enough ad-libbing in politics. I think he's really revolutionized things.

old Trump I was going to say good on him but I don't actually mean that I mean oh man he he wipes me out you can't say good old Trump Frank can't say I did I say good old Trump I think I just said old Trump okay yeah um you don't want legacy media picking up on it it just means that when Q and A is now in the press ask me for guilty pleasures I won't have to you know pretend it's Abba anymore I can say President Trump's speech to the United Nations I once said military parades in North Korea to a guy and he said to me he said do you like Abba and I said well you know not I don't have any strong feelings and then when it said when the thing was

published, it said guilty pleasures, Abba. I think he just didn't fancy military parades in North Korea. They censored you. They censored your love of North Korean parades, ironically. I love those big, you know, those Soviet parades when there's lots of, you know, absolute mass PE lessons. Yes, he loves that. And he likes, he likes order, yeah. And obviously, I feel a bit guilty about liking it, thus it is a guilty pleasure, whereas I don't feel any guilt about liking. You know, You've always been a pageantry fan. And that's not a euphemism. You just...

No. No. I love when they're watching the parade and they're nudging each other. And Kim Jong-un is nudging someone and then saying something. And I pay so much money to know what he could possibly... Is he just saying, that's mine as well? Yeah. Yeah.

That's another one of mine. Do you remember when his dad was around Kim Jong-Eel, there was one of the first sort of comedy... These we have loves? Yeah, one of the first comedy ones. websites I ever saw was Kim Jong-il looks at things. Yes. And it was him looking at things. And now you can Kim Jong-un looks at things also exist.

And I suppose like most leaders, they have to do a lot of looking at things. You could do a good King Charles looks at things, sort of inspecting a Victoria sponge, inspecting a type of cow. That's the best thing. When they have to wear like a white hat over their hair. and like a white lab coat thing so they can look at biscuits being made what a job it is a hairnet anyway we come to the end i'm sure my my line is sufficiently faint now on my covid test that i i trust we will all be back together in spirit land next time around if this has seemed a little odd or there's been any sound things or anything we're i

apologize for that you guys out there but thanks for bearing with us and I'm on the mend so we'll see you next time it's Frank off the radio Frank off the radio it's the Frankskinner podcast

don't you know thanks for listening to the podcast make sure to like and follow so you never miss an episode and if you want to get in touch you can email the podcast via Frank off the radio at Avalon UK.com.