The Frank Skinner Show - Causing Chaos

Episode Date: July 31, 2026

Frank and Em are joined by comedy writer Ruth Husko. Frank’s been causing chaos on Sunday Brunch, leaving Em with her head in her hands. Plus, Ruth shares her thoughts on the quiet coach on the train. If you want to message the show, email us at [e-mail] or WhatsApp us on 07457 417 769 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's Frank off the radio. It's the Frankskinner podcast, don't you know. Hello. Welcome to Frank off the radio. I don't even have the laminate thing that I read out at the beginning of the podcast. Oh, what's that? Does that hold all your information on it? All my information.

Let's see what I can remember. This is Frank off the radio with Emily Dean and Ruth Hosco. That's it. If you want to email us, there's an email address. And if you want to WhatsApp us, what about this? Oh, 7457-417-7-6-9. Oh, 7-457-4-17-769. What I liked was Sandy the Produce was going to leave and get the information.

When I said there's an email address, that'll do it. Well, I think I can remember it. I think it's Frank Off the Radio at Avalonuk.com. Okay. Okay. Well done, you. Yeah. I mean, I don't say it not often.

Only four times a week. It's not your world email addresses and things. You're a creative, darling. Every time I see an at symbol, I think, of a Cumberland sausage to this day. Do you not like an at symbol? I don't mind you. I like a Cumberland sausage. Case is anyone from Cumberland getting.

Not a potty thinking how dare. Cumberland sausage is to big commitment, though. Do you know what I mean? It's so vast. What I like about a sausage is, oh, I have one, maybe I'll have another. Cumberland sausage, it's like eight at once. I like the circular nature of it. Oh, it reminds me of unspeakable things.

I can't compare it. My cry for once and I gazed through the window at it. I was hypnotised for three days. Oh, dear. Very hypnotic, the cobblin sausage. Yeah, that'd be great. Imagine having to explain that in court. Can you imagine?

I'd be hypnotized by a cumble and sausage. I've been in Birmingham for three days, so it's really brought out me. It's brought out of me black country more than it. Do you get more black country when you've been out there? Do you find that really? I went out with our Keith. Oh, how is our Keith?

Oh, lovely. It's great But he He gets more black I mean he's very black country anyway And I get more black country When I'm with him And then I think he

He chases me And we end up going To like Alright by going down there It gets really like medieval black country What do you do with our Keith Do you could go for dinner together Or we went

Well what we did was I was with Bos as well My child So we picked Keith up From his flat, house? He waits outside so you don't want to sit in the flat. Why is that? I don't know.

Okay. I think maybe he has the severed heads of several locals suspended from the ceiling. I think that's quite a black country Birmingham thing. It is, yeah. Don't come in there. Always standing waiting on the doorstep. Yeah, exactly. Do you think because maybe the place it's not looking how you want it to or it's more of a talk?

No, I feel like it's maybe a sign of respect. Like you're ready. Exactly. You're not messing around. Yeah, he had a hat on and everything. He was all set. But we went out and I said, what's up to your teeth?

You said that to him? Yeah, there was five. No, but they weren't yellow. They were absent. There was the bottom set. There was nothing at the front at all. It was five or six teeth. I said, what's up to you?

He said, oh, fell over and fell flat on my face. and I think it was five teeth out. I said, wow, when are you getting them done? He said, oh, I ain't going to bother. Oh, okay. He said they're fine. They're not present. How can they be fine?

They're not. They no longer exist. No, so he's leaving it. He's leaving it at that. I sort of have a kind of admiration for that in a strange way. Well, I don't know. I don't want him to not look after himself. You can't have our Keith getting veneers, Frank.

I don't want him going off to turkey like Ryland. I'm not suggesting he gets veneers. I think I'm thinking you get a little bit of fencing. Does he do much chewing? Does he do much chewing? You know, that's one question I've never asked him. Because he might not need him if he has mainly soup-based. No, what do you think?

What do you have soup-based things? He's not that old. He's not a ray, my dog. No. I'm just saying he wasn't in a hurry to get him back, was it? Was it noticeable when he spoke then that the bottom teeth? Because the bottom teeth, some people, it's not as noticeable, is it? No, it was very natural.

Yeah, exactly. It was like, yeah, it was a real absence of teeth in the front of his mouth. You know, he looked well apart from that. But he said, I've lost weight. I said, that's the teeth. See? I don't know how much teeth wipe you can write that off for a start off.

Yes, I know what you mean? It's kind of like having the permanent presence of absence in your mouth. The presence of absence. What a beautiful term of phrase. Okay. And now we're talking about Keith's teeth. Yeah. Anyway, what else?

Well, I'll tell you what else, Frank. We've heard from Ruth Jordan. And I miss this. The morning sun shun down. Go on. And I'm gutted that I miss. this because Ruth has said it was so lovely to

see Frank on Sunday brunch especially as I thought he'd upset them last time and would never be allowed on again. I hope Frank enjoyed the food and had his trusty toothpicks with him and she was also very

excited that by a certain other guest who appeared alongside you. I didn't know you were doing Sunday brunch. Well you know I don't know to brag. He didn't like to Melvin. No. So, yeah, yeah, Charles Brandeth was on. So I did ask him...

You didn't. What he does in the high wave as far as John was against him. Absolutely mortoacado. You can't, you did not. He was evasive, basically. What did he say? I don't remember what you said, actually. He didn't like it.

It was a bit like asking Batman, something about... Do you wear underpants? Yeah, how are you actually contacted by the commissioner? There's some things that need to stay, you know, onto the desk. Did you not get a sense whether he listened to Brandon's watch? No, he don't listen to this. It was a weird show. I enjoyed it.

I always liked Sunday brunch. So who were the presenters again? Is it Matt, Sunday brunch? No, that's Saturday Kitchen. I get confused. It's not my love. Simon Rimmer and Tim. Vincent.

Love joy. No. Tim Lovejoy. Tim Vincent. Wow. I said Tim Vincent, Frank. What was he? Blue Peter in the 90s, maybe.

He was. I think he was. When you said Lovejoy, I thought you were getting confused with Ian in the shame, but you're right. Anyway, how was Lovejoy? Lovejoy.

It's a very pleasant show. Ricky Wilson was on. Oh yes, he's the young boy from the Kaiser Chiefs, isn't he? Anyway, so towards the end, I don't know. You know, one thing about Sunday Brunch. I don't know if you know, well, you do know people who have done live television.

There's one thing that's universally said, I just because, by, like, that's unbelievable. No one has ever said that about Sunday brunch. Oh, really? No. It is, it's so long. It's pleasant. But you do sort of, you get, you go native a bit. Really? Yeah, pretty soon. I was sprinkling a bit of seasoning. Yeah, because I bet you get there early and then you've got to do hair and makeup. up and then... Well, that don't take long.

Oh, does it not? No. Just a jab with a puff. But anyway... But anyway, I was... Towards the end, I think I got a bit stir crazy. Oh, did you? So Stephen Mangard was on the show.

He's a lovely man. He's a lovely man. But he did replace me on the art. Of course, Frank. So Tim Lovejoy says, so Stephen replaced you on the thing. He didn't. And I said, yeah, he did.

I said, you know, it was, it was complicated. And it just, something you never see. He said it was complicated. You never see on daytime telly. I just forgot I was on telly, basically. What did you say? I just said, I think by that stage on the production, I was universally hated. Sorry, you just said this on Sunday brunch?

Yeah. What did everyone say? And then Tim, I went a bit more, I elaborated, and then Tim said, The last time you were on, you were talking about being sacked by the radio station. Well, thanks for that. Let's get a whole hog on that. He said, who replaced you on that? So I said, who replaced me?

Yeah. And I said, don't worry. Him and Matting are both on the list. I thought you said you had a nice time. And then we talked about Room 101 getting there, going. Oh, my God. I can't watch this. I can never, ever watch this.

I said I'd ask the head of the BBC what they'd put in room 101. And they said, you. And that was the end of that. So it ended with, I just... That's all we got time for everyone. Thank you to you, thanks. It was actually very liberated. It was just, it just poured out of me.

And then, so that was the... So people were looking at me like, is he all right? Is he having a breakdown? It's like that network. And then a little voice to my left. Jeff, Giles, said, I'd really like you to come on my podcast. And I said to him,

now I like them podcasts where I get to talk as well. And then the show ended. It was like a sort of scorched earth policy. I believe this. I'm sure it's available online. Oh, I'm going to watch that, yeah. Yeah. I think I'm going to have to take some Tramadol

if I'm going to watch that. Oh, Frank, why do you... Don't mention Tramadon to me. Why? Why? Foh. Was that something else you talked about on Sunday brunch? No, I was in Birmingham this week, and I took my son to see my star. Oh, did you? How was it?

But, of course, now that they've got the trams and they have to change all the pavements, it's gone. They've got rid of your star? Has it? I thought he was still there. No. No. star? There's very few left. I think there's the archers. Filch. Filch is still there.

They should tell you if they're going to get rid of your start. I mean, they can't do that. No, it was very disappointed. You've done so much for that country. Yeah. So I ended up taking... I'm referring to the black country. I'm not calling Birmingham a country.

So I took my son to Birmingham to basically show him the trap. Oh, Frank. Has he been to Birmingham before? Well, that was another thing that happened on Sunday brunch. I was talking to a woman. Oh, sorry, because there wasn't enough. A woman who worked on the show was saying, oh, I got, I've got, my, my, uh,

a partner lives near you, blah, blah. And I said, uh, or his family lives near you. I said, I know that family. They're related to Lord Lucan, the, uh, the murderer bloke. She said, she said, uh, I don't think they are. I said, no, they are. And then I thought, oh, perhaps you're not supposed to know. Frank.

It was that kind of day. Do you know what I mean? It was that kind of day. I mean, if I said... Anyway, the next summer go on, I get a gold mug. So that's something to look forward to. Oh, my God. I think my favourite...

I mean, I don't even know how to unpick this, but is you saying to Charles Brandren, I quite like to talk. So I'm not going on your podcast. I didn't know he had one. Yes, he has. It's called Rosebud. It's about childhood. It's called Rosebud. In honour of Citizen Kane, I assume, Frank.

Oh, and Nicola Benedetti was on as well, the violinist. Lovely. How did you get on with Nicola Benedetti? I asked her of that thing, you know that bog bear of mine about... Oh no. Oh no, you didn't. That thing that at the end of an opera, the biggest applause goes to the orchestra, and they're the only ones who couldn't be asked to learn it. Please tell me you didn't say that to me. I said that.

She said, we know, they're very busy or something like that. Oh, my God. She was nice. She was sticking up for a mate. Why do you do these things? She's an expert. I have to say she was lovely. She was the sort of person you felt you could be open with and ask the question.

Well, you certainly fulfilled on that promise. Exactly. People are than police still pursuing Lord Lucan arrived at the back of the kitchen. That poor woman has gone home and said, What's this around Lord Luggan? I know that'll be terrible. Look, we kept this from you for 35 years. Oh, no.

The chaos, the chaos you've caused, Frank. Well, like, that was just, you know, local history. Anyway, Ruth Jordan, that is how Sunday brunch was. Yes, exactly. It was, yeah. In response to your question. And also on Giles' podcast, if it's called, Rosebud.

Rosebud. He had a jumper that had a rose on. He did. So he's doing some subtle promotion there. Oh, yeah. It's by stealth. Because I thought, oh, what's the meaning of this? But now I know.

Did you actually think, what is the meaning? I did because his jumpers are always sort of related to a theme in my mind. Are they? He loves a Winnie the Pooh jumper, doesn't he? He loves Teddy Bears. Yeah, he loves Teddy Bears. What's the subliminal message in that? I think with Winnie the Pooh, he likes the history of it.

In continent. wearing T-shirts one size too small He's got some sort of associations with Winnie the Pooh He knows a lot about the history of A.A. Milne, he's got connections with A&M. He'll be related to the Milnes. Or maybe he's just in the A.A. But there must be a point when Giles Brandreth gets dressed where he's just got the jumper on but no pants.

Oh, I don't want to say. No, no. Why must there be a point? I think that depends on the chronology. of his robing. Giles would always put that on last. I imagine he wears knitted pants with crochet pants. Crochet pants.

Yeah. You had knitted pants as a baby, didn't you? Yeah, I think his genitals are like one of them post boxes that have their scenes, knitted scenes. Absolutely not. Oh, I'll stop there. Stop right there. He was a very nice.

It was a very enjoyable experience. the whole show. Oh, really sounds it. Well, I enjoyed it. Let's ask them how they felt. They shouldn't keep feeding me, kick me energy levels off. Otherwise, I'd have faded about eight links to go. They should make the show shorter as well, so people don't go.

So look, they didn't have cumulent sausage or I'd have rid said all sorts of things. Oh, my, oh my. We've heard some other outside world, but do we want to, I want to, I want to, Kind of want to know what's been going on with Ruth as well. Oh, I'm not bothered about it. Oh, Frank, please. I'm not bothered about talking about it. Have you not ruined enough lives this week?

You've ruined life. That's what Kathy said. You've ruined life. What I love about when Kathy say that, what do I tell people that story? It never fails to get a laugh. Because it was about something so minor. Like you had an argument about you being forced to hold some seats for her and Rachel.

That's what it was, yeah. And you said, I've been standing here for ages waiting for you. And Kathy's really. You've ruined lives. I love her. I wish you wouldn't talk to other people. Listen to gossip. You've ruined lives.

She just held up a shot of Giles Brandreth in tears. Stephen Mangum looking visibly shaken. Oh, man. Oh, God. There's only one thing I want to talk about from my week is that I want to talk about the quiet coach in the train. Okay. Because I was at Kings Heath Comedy Festival this weekend.

Were you performing? I did a DJ set. I don't perform. You did a DJ? What, like Fat Boy Slim DJ? Well, like... You hold one hand in the air. I in the air.

Avichy. And I did that. I put my hand to my earphone. Everybody's doing the DJ set, aren't we? Yeah. I've done it three years on the trot. I remember showing a clip of Boy George doing a DJ set on a, on a show.

Chachar did and I asked a professional DJ what he thought and he said he looked like he was washing up Marky Smith I bet he looked just like a floating head because he had all his neck painted black Oh he doesn't do that anymore He doesn't do the black

That's great contouring though Yeah But anyway so I did that and then I had to get the train back and I was in the quiet carriage And for me I think it should be silent carriage What are your thoughts? I don't think people should be allowed to talk in there Well what I'm assuming that I don't see the difference between people talking and talking on the phone.

I agree. Yeah. People talk a bit louder maybe on the phone. I find the phone calls far more irritating. And the reason for that is if I'm going to have to listen to you, I'd like to make sense of what you're saying. Just hearing one person is very irritating. Oh, I like it.

It's like watching theatre of the absurd. I like to, when I hear them actually press, you know, to speak. I like to show, it's on the train! Get it in before they say it. Well, I was sad. Also, if they're having an affair and they're lying.

Well, what about that one who said I'm in a restaurant when I was on the train? I saw a woman walking down the street the other day saying... Oh, God, you and your Anna... Oh, Peter Houston off. And she was on the phone saying, oh, I'm at Highbury and Islington Station now,

and she wasn't. Where was she? Where was she? Where was she? Well, she was by the Arsenal stadium. She was nowhere near. Sorry, it's a bit London centric this, but, and I wanted to go, she's lying here. She's not going to be there for another 20 minutes. Nosey black countries. I just, yeah, I am really nervous.

I wonder what you're going to say. No, I'm really happy I have to keep doing this black country thing now. I can't say Birmingham anymore. No, you can. It's just, yeah, we're not from there. Okay. Well, I was in, Birmingham doing, I was

interviewing Tony I owe me. I've got an anecdote. about him as well. Hold on, let me show the back of my T-shirt. Go on, let's have a look. Or if I can do it with that, pulling me in white. Oh, it says Iommi in Gothic red lettering. It's the only way to write Iommi.

It says from the dark. So I was interviewing Tony Iommi in the jewelry quarter. Okay. At a pub called the actress and the bishop. Yeah, do you know? I know it well, yeah. So when I got there, I said to someone outside, because I got off by Black Sabbath Bridge

so me and Boss could have some photos and stuff with Black Sabbath Bridge. And then we walked along the canal. So someone said to me, which way did you come? When I got there, and I said, oh, we walked along the cot. And they said, what? And I thought, I'm in Birmingham now. Because the cot is the canal.

Oh, why do you call it the cut? I don't know, because it cuts through the landscape. Oh, I see. I don't know if it is that, but I like the sound of it. I didn't want to stop your flow, but I'm really sorry, Frank. I'm very embarrassed to admit. I don't know who Tony I owe me is. He's the lead guitarist for Black Sabbath.

Okay. And are they from Birmingham? They're very much from Birmingham. There's a pub called The Crown, which we also went to look at, which is now closed down. But there's a sign that says the birthplace of heavy metal. And it was Sabbath's first gig, was there? No, he's a total... And that was the one of yours one was in Black Sabbath?

Yes, exactly. Okay, great. I understand. So I was interviewing him. And do you remember I told you I'd interviewed, I'd known I'd gone to see Kirk Hammett, the Metallica guitarist. And somebody asked him how many guitars he'd got. And he looked a bit sheepish and said, 492.

So I told Tony this story, it's Tony now, my mate. and I said, yeah, Kirkhammy's got 492 guitars, how many of you got? And he looked even more sheepish than Kirkham it and said, I've only got 80. What a world it is. I've only got 80. The legendary guitarist, I have to apologise for me. Having 80 guitars.

But I mean compared to Kirkami. But do you know, I don't know how much it. you a brief thing then. So he's absolutely iconic guitar. They're called him the godfather of heavy metal and all that. But just before, he was about to go on tour with, before Sabbath, early days. And he worked in a sort of sheet metal company. And he chopped the ends off the two middle fingers of his left hand.

He's, of his right hand, sorry. And he's left-handed. So that's what he would finger his chords with. So most people would have said, that's my current. apparently he said he pulled the ends off and said oh are you going on two of them and so he said what I did I melted I don't know if I hadn't up on me I'll do him as blackguard I think you'll do all right you said so I melted some fairy liquid bottles and put them on the

end and made them and then I got to cut some bits out of my leather jacket so it got a bit of purchase I said to me you know when people throw their their guitar picks into the audience. Have you ever on a real heady night, chuck one of your fingers? He's very ingenious. He should give you Arkeiths some tips for his teeth. But in his book he comes over as the sensible one. He lets him get to the rehearsals at 9 o'clock. But then you get

a bit slightly, and then I set to Bill Ward the drummer on fire and he fell over in terrible pain. He said he was on the floor screaming. He said, I don't know what it was. I still put it a bit more light of fuel on him. They painted him as well. And he went into shock. I used to do things to him all the time.

So he's had a tough few years. But what's brilliant. I mean, he's so sad when Ozzy died. Tony Ayami now always wears light blue glasses, light blue lenses. I know the type. Yeah. And they've brought, his new album is coming out, out of the dark. It is called Out of the Dark.

It's on my back. Yeah, yeah, yeah, from the dark. From the Dark. Yeah, from the Dark. I thought that was wrong. From the Dark, yeah. And one of, you know, they bring out like colored vinyl. They're bringing out a see-through blue vinyl.

called the eyeglass. Oh, very good. Because I've booked, I said to her, I've already booked the prescription. What? But it was great. I can't tell you, I was like a pig-in shit. Oh, Frank. And Buzz must have liked it.

Oh, Buzz loved it. Buzz added photo up with him and chatted to him and all that. He's got quite a collection, Buzz. It was great. He's got Buzz Aldrin, the Pope, Tony Iommi. And what made me feel even better. was that East Star has been ripped off off the street. See?

You got a story about Tony. Can I tell you one really weird anecdote, which I didn't know you might know. About Tony Iommi? Yeah, you wrote the Armenian Eurovision song contest in three one year. No. Most unlikely bloke. You know who I'd like to see is if Tony I'mami has a partner, I'd like to see what that partner looks like,

because I've got thoughts. Oh, go on. What's your guess? I'm imagining a bit Annie Nightingale. God rest her soul. Do you know what I mean? A lot of blonde hair. She's Swedish. Yes, Swedish. That's what I was hope.

That's exactly what I was hoping for. Okay. Are we looking at all right? What were you going to say about Tony I mean? It's not much of an anecdote like many of mine, but I went for a job interview in the ball ring in, God, maybe 10 years ago. And I was in the management suite, and Tony Iommi walked in. And I thought, oh, I know who that is. And I had to get up to leave the room.

And he went to the door and I held the door open for me, like a true joke. Oh, and tell me, two of his fingers fell off. Stuck to the door. And I thought, what a lovely man. He is, it is. It is. It is. It was, I have to say. You know, when you made someone who you're slightly in awe of and they're nice. Yeah.

Because we had to be interviewed by Nina Narnar first. Okay. You know, the well-known backing vocalist. Do you know Nina Nana? I mean, I love, you've told me about Nina Nona. Is that nice? She's her? Yeah.

Saturday night when it starts and goes you know no you can't do that she's a you know a journalist yes I know who that is

so she interviewed us start with and then I was due to interview him after and at the end of his interview he was just on ITN I said to him thanks for keeping all the good stuff for my interview oh Frank

you've done it again oh man it was great we had such a great day we saw our you went and saw Ozzie the bull. Oh yeah, people flock from miles around. There's this giant mechanical bull. Is it named after Ozzy Ozzy's? Yeah, and they've put, you know all

these Aussie's circular shades? They put them on them on him. Oh my god, I want to go there just to be the bull. I'll show you pictures it looks great. Poor old Ozzy has to represent. They had to about three months ago they had a peaky blinders cap on it. Oh yeah.

All Birmingham themes it has to come. Poor Ozzy be wheeled out for think Birmingham. Oh man. Poor old. I'm so glad you enjoyed that. We went to,

sorry, I'm completely taken off with this. It's Iommi. You don't meet Iommi every day of the week. No, you don't. We went, there's an Aussie exhibition at the museum. Weirdly, there's a, there's a massive Lucifer

in Birmingham Museum and Art Gallery, which I saw as a kid, I only went there once as a kid, I think this is a school thing. Tremendous penis it's got. And can I just clarify Frank uses tremendous in this sort of literary tradition No it was it not in a praising no no it says it in the size like it's gargantuan Yeah

And I remember as a kid I hadn't seen it for years and I remember it's been like 20 foot high in this statue And then when I went back when I was like a in my early 20s it was in the tea room And it was it was about I don't know eight feet But anyway, now it's in a prominent position where it's brilliant. It's a brilliant thing if a bit terrifying. But they've got it. I don't know if it's accidental. It's outside the Aussie exhibition, as if Lucifer is welcoming it into the Prince of Darkness.

So hang on it. So Lucifer. Is Lucifer traditionally depicted naked? I don't know. I've never seen him in clothes. What clothes does Lucifer wear? Well, in this he's. wearing a very

sort of frontless skirt which you don't see every day it's so tacky didn't you have like fur legs oh no that's Mr Tomnus

oh yeah he's not Louis sir he's mischievous and a bit puck-like and playful I would not describe him as evil I like that inviting

strange children back to your house is now seen as mischievous and a bit puck like boss is also obsessed with Lincoln Park. We were at Black Sabbath Bridge. Yes. And I said that's the utility center over there,

which is an arena, utility arena. I play that, so I was showing off. And he said, oh no. That's where Chester did his last ever gig. And Chester Bennington, who was the lead singer, that was it. So we went down there. And we saw another guy who'd got a Lincoln Park top. on. I said I bet he's here to pay homage to Chester as well.

Did you speak to him? So I went up and I said, you're here for Chester? He said, what? I said you a big linking part fan. He said, no, I've just got this in Primark. Oh, it was a Ramon's situation. That's the top. Primark now.

They got so many bands. They have. They've got a system of a down T-shirts in there which surprise me. I know. I got Boz a cracking bon Jovi baseball cap from the one in Birmingham. Yeah, I've got a Pantera baseball cat from there. I'm into the cats.

I love Pantera. Yeah. Well, I've got a baseball cat saying which aren't energy. Yeah, I've moved over. I've transitioned to the baseball cap life. But I hear what we did. They had platinum records of Ozzy. And, look at that.

There's only four tracks on this side, but there's five, you can see five tracks on the actual album. And you know, often the thing that they paint gold, or silver of platinum is just any albums that got left over. Yes. Because there's a story, the Rolling Stones got absolutely arse old one night, decided to play one of their gold records, and it was Body Holly's greatest hits.

Anyway, sorry. We should probably go outside one. Shall we? Yeah. Well. I've talked too long. I apologise. You haven't talked too long, right?

At least I haven't given way any massive family secrets. No, you haven't insulted anyone or criticise them? said anything lukaneum. What I would say is you haven't ruined any lives thus far. No, that's good. Jonathan has got in touch. Dear Frank Emily and Ruth, greetings from the Midlands.

I know it isn't a nature documentary and I was planning to let Emily off the hook for calling gorillas monkeys. You know, recently on the podcast, I do apologise. I've already apologised to the entire ape community. I was talking about Robin Williams. What did they say?

That's exactly what they said probably enough. Were you listening? Yeah. I was referring to Coco the gorilla who befriended Robin Williams and a lot of other celebrities. I've done a lot of charity work for the chimpanzee community. Have you? Yeah, I started pink ass day. Well, you have a big pink ass on the grill of your car, drive around.

Why'd you have to ruin my things? Clip them on. So disgusting, honestly. Talking about a very wholesome subject. See, I didn't know that. this cocoa. So I was unable to help. I know. I referred to Coco incorrectly. I started calling her a gorilla and then I got over-excited and I called her a monkey. I do apologize. Look, there was no malice in it. No. Jonathan has let me off the hook, fortunately, my kind of guy.

But then Frank came out with a statement that gorillas were more brutal than chimpanzees. I felt I had a duty towards the public to set that straight. Perhaps one day your life may depend on it, Frank. Burillas are mostly very gentle and eat celery. Chimpanzees can be so violent that I'm told zookeepers would prefer to be locked in a cage with the lions than with the chimps or a man. They have teeth like a lot of them.

I presume you're not told up by the zookeeper. They're relatives. They have teeth like a lion And an utterly terrifying temper and intelligence No, they have got I tell you Elvis had one And it went wild It got very long hair

I don't know why I'm not so funny So they had to shot it in the room Until someone could come and They got long haired What? Because it was the 70s I got long head I don't know Yeah you know Elvis didn't like that

They're my hippies Lawing around laddies I don't want to kill that fucking hippie chimpanzee. Yeah, but Elvis we call you. Just fucking do it. I go, one of them hippie ones. It's not what I wanted.

I want a regulation hair guy. You're smoking bananas. Stop it. Swinging around. So, Frank, and also in the wild, they occasionally go to war with neighbouring groups. So if you're ever presented with a choice between being thrown to guerrillas,

or chimpanzees, which could well happen if you appear on Sunday brunch again, perhaps some kind of Bond villain might give you the choice on his island lair. You need to choose the guerrillas. I love how Jonathan signs off. Best of luck, Frank. Oh, nice. Well, that's worth now. What do you think about that?

Well, I've heard chimpanzees. I think Bubbles went a bit wild at the end. Bubbles is still alive, I believe. No, I don't think so. I think I read Bubbles was still alive. I think it burst. Ruth, do you have any info on this? 43?

There's an outside world, yeah. Yes. What does it say about Bubbles? Your recent discussion about Cocoa the gorilla and Robin Williams made me wonder about Bubbles, much to my surprise, Bubbles is still with us. Yeah, I bet they won't be teaching that one

any fucking sign language. God. I'd love to watch the video that police interview. There must have been a Michael has died. Oh, yeah, Cocoa wise. I mean, a lot of people did enjoy your... Yeah, Coco.

Coco mind who? They're very self-centered, the chimpanzees. I'm grateful. Very ungrateful, I find them. They're narcissists. They are. They are. But, yeah, well, as you pointed out,

a lot of people we should say, well, agreed with your point, Frank. Why tell her? Why tell her about the test? Exactly. Just don't tell her. It's best that she doesn't know. It could have been someone in the other room going,

Oh! all that and she thought, oh good, he's still knocking around. Played records and, you know, leave a glove on the sofa. Oh, God. Oh, stop it. Get back to Sunday brunch. Oh, gold mug next time. I had to pull someone out of the back for that one.

I had to start watching them two crime things with me. I feel absolutely ill at the thought of you going all again. Well, I might not be asked back. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. A new winter change is blowing. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. I'm not totally sure how it's going. Thanks for listening to the podcast.

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