The Frank Skinner Show - Frank’s New Friends!

Episode Date: August 10, 2026

Frank is joined in Edinburgh by comedian Vittorio Angelone and playwright Bryony Kimmings. Frank’s got new friends, Vittorio’s landed his first acting job, and Bryony doesn't do hugs. If you want to message the show, email us at [e-mail] or WhatsApp us on 07457 417 769 Frank Skinner: Work In Progress is at Studio One at Assembly George Square Studios 5-16 AugustCrowd Work with Frank Skinner is at Studio One at Assembly George Square Studios 17-26 August Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's Frank Off the Radio. It's the Frankskinner podcast, don't you know? Give my regards to Sergeant Fury. He's gonna be my Judge and Julie. This is Frank Off the Radio. I'm joined by Brian E. Kimmings and Vittorio Angelone. Follow the podcast on X and Instagram. You can email the podcast via Frank Off the Radio at Avalon, UK.com.

What's up? What's up? Oh, 7457, 417417769 Oh, 7457, 4177679 I have just accidentally recreated The Roy Keene advert on the telly When he's trying to use his phone to buy for a cup of coffee And he starts really banging his phone on the machine

I was doing that with my finger on the jingle thing and then Brianie Kimmings very delicately, just barely touched it. Dantily. Barely touched it. Like, you know, sometimes when a butterfly is a bit too close and just catches your cheek with the wing tip, it was like that. Wow. But this is one of her props for her elaborate theatre pieces.

Oh, of course. Can't start that again, guys. So I did a gig on Saturday in London and before I left. I'm doing work in progress gigs at the moment, which if anyone doesn't know, it's like trying to desperately build a new stand-up show and having to air your dirty washing in public.

So I've been doing that for a bit. So I did those Thursday and Friday. And then on Saturday, I did a show where I did my old material for half an hour. Oh man. Cozy. Doing material that you really know and that you've got fake.

I didn't apologize once during the whole show. I just, I felt myself getting bigger and, oh, it was fucking great. Why did people ever bother with? I don't understand it. People did the same 20 minutes for years. Now I see why. No, shoot me in the head.

To do the same over and over. Yeah, yeah. I couldn't imagine doing something in front of people. We don't do that in theatre. like we don't put things that we're not sure about in front of people to see what it's hot. No, you are for it. The arrogance. The arrogance. The arrogance to not even consult the audience at any point in the creative process. I'm considering the audience the entire time. Just so you know, I am thinking about, I mean, I test it, but I don't test it. I get people in, test audiences. But I don't test it like just. Test audiences. Well, we just call them audiences.

Yeah, but they're not going to go and tell people about it on the phones and stuff because they've just been a good. They're all bloody test audiences as far as I'm concerned. I find them very testing. No, but I'm constantly. I mean, they're my editor. That's why it's terrified. They're my director. They don't laugh. It's gone.

Oh, okay. I never persevered with any. I have nothing. I'm not like you, Brian. I have nothing to say. I just want to make people laugh. That's as simple as that. I don't think that's true.

But they won't. No, no, it's been all right. But I need to get on to this. So it's something great, though, about all that. Oh, I just felt like a different person up there. It was beautiful. And Paddy Young and Celia A.B. Was this Somerset House?

No, it was The Round House. Oh, yes, yes. Was it a you and friends? Well, when I was booked, they said, do you want to do you want to do a show with some other comedians and were your headline? I said, yeah, that's fine. And then when I saw it said Frank Skinner and Friends.

And given how deliberately you've just pronounced, both of their names it doesn't feel like they're your friends. No, the truth is, people who know me will say, what, he's got, he's got friends nowadays. He's got friends in their 20s. Yeah, exactly. I've got friends. I'm like Steve Harrington from Stranger Things.

I've got friends who are basically children. Yeah, these are my friends. Paddy Young, call him Young just to hammer home. the wrongness and a young French woman. I don't know either of these people. Well, they're my own friends. Oh, they're your friends. Frank Skinner with your friends.

Patty Young and Celia AB standing for adolescent bambino. I don't know what the AB stands for. But they both went really well and stormed it and they were great. and Paddy does I say Paddy I mean Paddy Young I don't know him well enough To just call him Patty

I just don't know this world I don't think Old Pad So you're going to say he does SNL He does SNL yeah And Sally is on the writing team You were submerged in the SNL team On Saturday

I was What does that mean Submerged into an SNL team It means the other two are on SNL And I was Oh I see It's a bit like You know where my friends

You know how this podcast I would say this was a Christmas carol. Yeah. You, Brian, would be comedy present. You, Victoria, would be comedy future. And you. Anyway, so, I was that the round house? And you're Marley covered in chains?

No, I'm the past. I'm the past, all right. So, so anyway, I was, talking to them afterwards and we actually honged around in the dressing room for about 25. But they're not friends. They are now. They're not. Okay.

Jesus. Well, I'm very, I'm very, I'm very, I'm very, picky about the word friends. Okay, fine. I think that friends has got to be someone I couldn't tell any dark secret knowing for certain they'll never share it. Okay. In other words, no one. Absolutely.

I include my wife. no she's no friend of mine she's the closest they get but there's you know i allow the fact that she'll tell her sister everything i tell still so um we finished it and then um we there was a bit before we went on um someone said to me they don't do much comedy here so um make some allowances you know and I thought what does that mean and then the woman came up to me and said your microphone's on a stand it's like on a stand at the front of the stage

and you can either just talk to it in the stand like that or you can take it out and walk around with it in your hand no she didn't and I said they might not do comedy but are they from fucking Mars these people from Mars that they need to explain this level of I mean I know nobody knows what

am anymore but bloody how did I think I was headlining. Yes, I would accept this is a gripe if last week you hadn't told us about in boots phoning your assistant to ask what type of razor please you. Why bring that on? You need to. Why bring that up? I shared that with you and now you're robbing my nose in it. Did she really say that?

Well, you can just pick it up and take it and walk it around. But she'd said to me, I'd said terrible. There'd been a terrible comming it. The thing is at my age, if you make a mistake, if you guys make a mistake, they're just thinking, oh, well, you know, like the other day I turned up for my sound check 24 hours early. Okay. Now, if you, Vittorio, say, turned up for a sound check 24s out, people would have a laugh

about it, you know. For me, I know my management, including James Taylor, my management are saying how much longer? Is it a symptom? Is it a symptom? All of a sudden it's a symptom? can we use him. Okay. So you're outside.

And I'm menopause. They think that of me. So you're fine. I'd have menopause. Yeah, but you come through menopause. I'm afraid there's only one way you come through old age. Oh, God. Anyway, so she said, she told me this about it and she said, Paddy's got his own microphone.

And I thought, he's got a fucking microphone. It's only been on telly, five minutes. And I thought he turned, I thought, I thought she meant his own microphone. Do you know what I mean? That he turned up with, he turned up with a box and said like, sure on it or something, whatever they call. Gold sparkly. Yeah. That says SNL on us.

But it was a really nice, clean one. And said SNL, yeah. But, and I said, you've got your own microphone. Is that what comics do now? And he said, are you mad? And I thought, I see, I can't no respect from them anymore. My friends. And then afterwards, as we was leaving, I've got a bit more confidence.

I think they like me better now. And I said, because you know why the roundhouse is round? No. It's because it used to be where they'd turn the trains around. So it's at the end of the track and they spun it round. That's cool. And then I said, it had only been going a few years when they changed the size of the carriages. So the whole place was done.

It couldn't be used. And Paddy said to me, me, you spend a lot of time on on your own in dressing rooms, don't you? Because I'd said to him the big difference about success, because he's obviously now on the, he's on the ladder to the roof, as I think the drifters said, could have been the coasters. But I said to him one of the big differences is you don't get conversations like this where you sit around and then talk because you're on your own in the dressing room.

And then he used it against me. Anyway, the op shot of this, and this is where I'm asking your advice, I was in, I've been in Edinburgh for a couple of days, and there aren't that many shows on that, you know, there's a sort of a ramp at the beginning of the festival. So I looked at the shows that was on. I thought I'll go and see somebody's comedy. And Celia A.B. was doing it, and I thought, well, I can't go to that.

But she's your friend? No, A, she's not my friend. But B, I was in a dressing room with her on Saturday night. Remember, I'm a 69-year-old man. Yeah, it would look weird. If I turn up at her show on Tuesday, she would be well within her rights to call the police. It's weird. Don't you think that would be weird?

I think there's some people that would read that unkindly. I wouldn't do it to you. to Victoria and you know. I would phone the police. If you show up at my show tomorrow night. Well, you'd be right to. Well, that's fair enough. I think that's true.

You think I did the right thing? Yes, absolutely. It looks creepy. I don't know. I know you didn't mean it creepily. No, no, but it's not what you mean. You don't know. You don't know.

I think it's nice to go to somebody's show and be supportive. And I wouldn't ask for a comp. No, no. I was going to pay. It's like, it depends where you sit. There's a level of creepiness depending on where. Don't sit in the front. No.

With the back. She might not even see you at any point. Is that worse? But if I sit at the back, she's thinking, why is you sitting at the back with his back on his lap? Oh, gosh. No, but anyway, I didn't go. It's interesting because I thought when I ran it by you guys, you're going to say, no, you're being wildly over-sensitive. But no, you said, no, you were quite right.

No, you said he should go. I think you should go. No, I wouldn't do it. I don't want her to feel that there's any sense of creepiness around. And I don't want to feel uneasy. It's not as if there hasn't been lots of that stuff in this industry before. Do you know what I mean? I haven't heard of any of this.

Have you not? What do you mean? No, nothing. I think I'm very reacting. I haven't heard of much, but maybe men down here about it. No, I think we were here. both of you were like stop it. I think we would have heard about if there was creepy man around the comedy industry.

I always think of... This is really weird. The problem is I think you're being ironic and I'm being awfully sincere. You're being sincere and he's being ironic, exactly. It didn't happen in my day. You know why? You know why? Because there was no fucking women.

And that's how we keep them safe. That was the mistake. But that's how we keep them safe. But that was women. Yeah, they put themselves in danger as what they did. Like coming into comedy. No. I'm joking, for God's sake.

Anyway, oh dear. Victoria, tell me what you've been doing since you've been in Edinburgh or something. Well, I only arrived in Edinburgh yesterday, but I've had like a brief a few days off. I did my first ever, like, acting job for the month of July. So I've been being in like... Your first one in July or your first ever acting? First ever acting job. Oh, okay.

Technically second ever, but the first one was the first one was the first one. pilot for the thing that is now. Oh, I think it's going to say, but the first one was second shepherd from the left at school. Yeah, I thought that's what he was going to say. I don't think they're in a nativity place anymore, do they do. We did, but that was, you know, 25 years ago. Okay.

Yeah, my son does. Wow. You mean yesterday? Hang on. So tell us. What was the gig? Yeah, is it serious acting or comedic acting? So it's in a sitcom on the BBC.

Did you write it? No. A very brilliant writer called. Matthew McDevitt wrote it, but I'm... You've become an actor already. You're the star. That's so exciting. But you make a great actor because they always say we have the most amazing director.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. Do you watch it, you think, no? You must, do you always say, Brian? Don't you say, well, I've got this fantastic producer, it's incredible director. No, I do not. Okay.

Because I do it all myself. Oh, well, then it'd be awkward if you... Yeah, but it's like, the writing was fantastic, the direction was fantastic. The writing team. It does a whole thing yourself. This time, the first time I did it with the director. Who was that? It was lovely.

A friend of mine. I want to know about this. What's it called? It's called rewarding. So it's about care work. I play a carer and we work with a neurodivergent cast of like you play like the clients and stuff. And it's like really good crack. Very, very funny.

A very sort of like gallows humor like tough job. And actually Andy Burnham just announced that he's increasing pay for care workers. And we were like, can you hold the whole. off until he's killed the shop. Did you used to do that as an actual job? No, I had, I worked in a special needs school briefly when I was a teen. I've just written a sitcom about releasing sex offenders early from prison. He's ruined that as well. Oh no. What is he? Is he after comedy? What's he doing? Yeah, I think he is. Yeah. That's why he's didn't stand next week. He's outlying sitting in coffee shops in New York. Yeah, my author, my, my, my Edinburgh show,

about centering everything in London. That's important. He's killed that. I know. What have I done to Burnham? He doesn't like me. When's it going to be on? Quite soon, quick turn on.

End of November it comes out. Oh, all right. This is a bloody comedy podcast. Not a plug-in show. Yeah. Sounds amazing. It was good, Greg. My granny came to set at one point because we were doing some filming in the park.

Maserati. No, I assume that's her name. Maserati Angelona. It's definitely works. It's my Irish grandmother. Grandma Sorotti. That's nice. That's what I should have called that car. That is nice.

It took an hour, but you know what? It's worth waiting for. And my granny isn't away with the fairies yet, but she's certainly like in the departure lounge to be away with the fairies. Does that make sense? She's got a few marbles left, but not loads of marbles left.

So she's up and is sort of confused by the whole on set experience and she walks up and, you know, everybody going quiet down, quiet down, rolling, action. And as soon as they said action, like everybody's been taught the shot up for about two minutes before that, as soon as they say action

and we're about to start the scene, my granny goes, this is daft. That's what acting needs. People who cut to the very centre. She was cracking everybody up. The lovely hair and makeup lady, Sharon came over to her. Lovely, lovely hair and makeup lady.

There's some real, there's some real battle access on the production. David, bastard. Thank God we got a bit of balance. Sharon goes up to my granny and goes,

oh, just so you know Vittorio gets punched in the face in this scene but like, don't worry, it's just for the show and my granny goes, well, I'm not going to go rescue him. Oh, well.

That's really nice that you had her on. They got her a big, like, over, you know, those actory overcoats the key ones and sat her in a little directory chair she's having the time of her life fantastic i got my brother in uh in a sitcom that i wrote but very i'm in a non-speaking part he just had to fish and one of the extras said to him uh so how did you get this he said i used to sleep with the writer which was absolutely true but uh but um but but But the trouble is with that.

When we did that episode, it was a bit over time. And the obvious thing to cut was the beautiful shot of the guy fishing. Yeah. And I said to the director, you can't cut that. He said, look, you know, we're going to have to, just for the plot, we need that, you know, the diet. I said, well, you can't cut that. So, you know, you didn't cut it. I don't often lay the law down, but I just, it couldn't do it.

No way. It would be awful. that so I've never worked with my family really since then I mean I know that's what I learned from that I know actors who spent three months working on a film and then they found out at the premiere that they weren't in it big actors not like massive but like could have been Peter Capaldi was in what was that magic film with um it's a woman who went out with brad pitt Angelina Jolie maleficent yeah maleficent he would he should have been in that and then he was caught.

Completely cut? Yeah. This is Peter Capaldi, that's he's a big. I know, but he's a big actor. He's getting bombs on seats. He kept dipping into Malcolm Tucker in a Disney film though, so it was tricky for them to be keeping a win. That is.

You're a fucking witch! That's what the old woman shouted out the Maserati when they saw Bog Witch walking up the road. Walking up the road. road. Bogwitch? Magwitch? Who was Magwitch? Is he in Bleak House? He's Dickensian. I don't know any of the words you're saying. I'm reading some Charles Dickens at the festival. Oh, I was going to maybe do that. Oh, you turned it down because you thought you were too good for it. Am I right? Well, I'm doing it.

No, I didn't. I turned it down because I didn't think I'd be able to do it very well. Oh, come off. You were born to do it. No, I couldn't, I couldn't read it. Bogwich does Magwitch. Imagine the headline. Yeah, yeah. Imagine the headline. Oh, if you're doing it, I might do it then. Top of the Herald. It just seemed a bit scary, no? I mean, you're both doing improvised shows.

Mine's got a murder in it, so it's fairly scary. They've given it, they tell you before. They send me the script and they said it's 45 minute reading. Yeah, exactly. Who wants to do that? That is long. Me. Fine.

You know, I need stuff to do. Mopper on my own. I'll just see. I went to the pictures on my own. I mean, how to- I can't go to anyone's shows? I got to the cinema. Okay, call it the cinema.

If you want to be all modern about it. The talkies. I just said, I went to them. I realised that said to two people. Half my age. I went to the pictures on my own. But you know, they used to call it the pictures.

You know, they had no, they said we got no soft drunks. Soft drunks. We got no soft drunks. No soft drunks in Edinburgh. What's happened? We've only got hard drunks. I'm afraid to know.

Oh shit. Okay, I'm, okay, let them do it. Ah! All right, I've hurt my ear this time.

Um, no, uh, they, uh, they said we got no soft drinks except sloshies. You didn't, you get a sloshy?

No, I said, I can't have a sloshy. Oh, you could have. No. You could have. I said,

I said, would you, would you do me a cup of water? So that's what they did. That's sad. No, that's sad. I had a cup of water.

You know, that, that, that, in your seat that's for like great big Coca-Cola's and popcorn. It's a tiny wall. Did you have the big, fingers in it, kind of?

I'm going to read you something from the outside world. Okay, I don't know. Yeah. I like you. Still calling the movies, the pictures. What? Like, I love where you think these, do you think these are telegrams?

People have been listening on the wireless. This is his eyes. This is brilliant. It's one of those. It's one of those. It is. that hasn't really been enforced. Quite right.

Disapproving me. That's like from the mani bush. I'm going to have to turn my back on you. Yeah, we're going to have to turn my back on you. This is from John Malloy. Made up name. Could be one of mine. In last week's podcast, Ruth, this is...

Ruth, Hosko, yeah, was telling a story about the time she worked in a housing office and they would receive a cringy email rounding up the month's activities. This struck a chord with me. As when I worked in a job centre many years ago, we also used to receive a cringy monthly newsletter. In one particular newsletter, one of the staff won a Benefit Centre snooker tournament. Brilliant. And his picture was on the front cover. The photographer, for some reason, hadn't taken his picture at the event.

So it was taken in the office with him leaning in a snooker style pose across his desk, using a biro as a temporary cue, which he had aimed at a ball of elastic bands. Fair pie to the photographer for his pragmatic approach to try and capture the magical essence of the tournament win. That's amazing. That sounds like an Edinburgh poster. You know, a bireo, snooker.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Oh, man, I love that. Okay, this is from Ian Angle. Okay. Eve sends in a lot of ponds. Ian Angle. He's the punmeister general.

Okay. Are the puns sharp or obtuse? Sometimes they're tremendous. Ian. This is from Ian Angle. Someone who until now didn't know Tony Iommi from Black Sabbath. Tony Iommi's the lead guitarist of Black Sabbath, who I interviewed recently.

It was great. I'm sure. I was brilliant. No, he was great. I was. Well, yeah, I was pretty good. I'm sure I'm not the only person who's never heard of that bloke before. That bloke.

You've certainly raised awareness, Frank. You ought to now call him Tony, you owe me. That's nice. To me. That's nothing. No, that does nothing to me. Kimmings for all her well-meaning kindness. When she is a bad pon, she's savage.

I'm awful, yeah, I don't think that's funny. Oh. Sorry, Ian. I think I'm also a bit hungry, so it might be that, could be that as well. Are you hungry? Yes, okay, I'll eat after. We can get you something. I've got there enough.

You can get your PA to get me something. She's in London. Well, she could. She'd deliver you a Pratt? She could, yeah. No, she wouldn't. I live in the countryside. I don't know what that means.

She's a one woman, one man. Woman, okay. She's one man of a woman. Frank, I saw you. This is Dale. Frank, I shouted at you in the street. I screamed at your face in the street. I would love to get that.

I'd be so good. I'm trying to say I loved your show, but you wouldn't listen. Yeah. The spelling's terrible. Yeah. Why did he do that at that car? I think he probably had mental health problems. I don't think he did.

Do you think he knew who you were? No. I don't think you knew who he was. Okay, so he's drunk? No, he wasn't drunk. I think he just probably hates people coming in from outside for the festival. They do a bit, they do a bit. The outfit you were saying, round glasses, M and S bag.

Oh, no. You've got Edinburgh Festival written all over you. Yeah, exactly. I understand that, no. I think I automatically would have punched, would you? You think you would have punched the man? If somebody shouted in my face, I think I'd automatically have punched. If I had done that, I don't think we'd be sitting here there.

No, you'd be dead. my bed. This would be awake. This would be hospital radio. Hi, Frank and guest. This is Gail from North East Hampshire. Who knew that Hampshire had been so delicately separated?

I would take a North Hampshire or an East Hampshire. I don't know if we can divide Hampshire. What's North East Hampshire? I know. This is absolutely insane. Farnham? Farnham?

Farnham? Farnham? Farnham? Yeah. Is Farnham? Or at Surb? I don't know. I don't know enough about Hampshire to really contribute to them. I like maps. I like maps. Okay. Well, then you'll love the fact that she's from northeast Hampshire.

Hmm. Frank, I saw you on the televisions last Sunday with Charles Brandreth, amongst others. Lovely jumper, I think they mean he is. I'm just contacting you to let you know that I cook porridge in the microwave in three, one-minute bird. stirring after each burst in a pyrex jog. When ready, I had maple syrup then consumed with a spoon straight from the jog. That is horrible. Ah! Now this... That's horrible.

There's two... The reason is I eat my porridge from the saucepan. Why? Don't mind it, don't love it. Because what is the point of... Don't mind it, don't love it. Why dirty a bowl for no reason? Hang on, but isn't...

Hang on a minute. Are you eating it with your hands? Isn't the pot hot? No. The pot. Hot underneath. Now I just put a tea towel underneath. In our house, I find the tea towel is the most, it's like a skeleton key of domestic living.

I use it for everything you can imagine. It's got to have your arm all the time. Yeah. Oh man, the teetel, get a teet towel, dry my hands, cover things with it. What about the spoon scraping on the bottom? Does that not get the back of your head? Are you worried about the Teflon? well yeah that also we don't have teflon yeah no nonstick nonstick's bad for you

stainless steel cast iron i don't know you must have something are you an enamel i don't know i'll have to go bastard asthmann at oxford these are lucruzay pans brady listen how long do you take to put if you're putting it in for a minute taking it out stirring it another minute there's a lot of i mean who's got time for that it's so easy to make porridge you just put it in a pan i'm surprised you could watch sunday brunt if you're that busy in the I know, so busy. What I did as a child with Ready Break because I would just heat up the milk in a plastic cup

and then chuck it in and then everything just warms up as it mixes and it's all nice and good. Well, what worries me about the jog is that when I was at school, I remember I drank out of, you know, there's a jog you get on the table in the dinner halls, we used to call it. It's probably called the fucking lunch hall now with cups around it. And I just drank. straight out the jog. I knocked it back Viking style. And someone said to me, it's really bad luck

to drink out of a jog. Really? The next day I got expelled. What for drinking out the jog? No, for other stuff. Tell us. No. Okay. The letter said, the letter said embezzling the school meal service. But it's the jog. That's the key thing. Those, yeah, jug's not quite circular jug on the school lunch hall It's got like lots of little sites I'm thinking coloured metal, that one Remember the coloured metal? Is that way before your time?

Plastic had been invented by the time I went to school. Oh really? Yeah and what did that do? It poisoned the ocean So don't get too hoity-to-oisy about it That jug wouldn't have hurt anyone But it got me expelled I know

But it had meant me I'm not that I do salute Magpon Yeah, yeah, me too, of course. Well, magpie, I say, I, I say, I, magpie. Oh, I say good morning, Mr. Magpie. Oh, yeah, I've heard that. I know what you're thinking, sexist, but I'm not there to, you know, get that, I don't get that close. Don't tell me what I think.

Okay. I'm telling you what to think. So what do you do when you see one magpie? Well, I assume you call them bog pies. Why? Because we've got the magwitch and then the bogwich. I can't do that sort of thing. No, I like this sort of.

I can't do that. Word play. Okay, good. Okay, wordplay. Okay. I nearly said the wrong way around then. Play word? No, don't I.

Plurway? Purdway. Wasn't he Doctor Who? Plurdy. John Purdway? Wasn't he Doctor Who like I don't know? I'm going to give you another quick one. Hey?

Sarah here, a long-time reader. I call the listeners readers. I can't remember one. And so you should. I have been dipping into an old chapter of your podcast. where Frank had been told by Daisy, Daisy was the producer at the time, that hugging him is an uncomfortable experience. Frank then simply claim that he doesn't hog like a plasticine tabard as some men do.

I'm giggling away. Now, I have to say this is, you know, whenever anyone quotes your joke, you always think, oh, you've killed that. Now, God bless you, Sarah from Lancashire, and I thank you for laughing. but I don't it's not like hogging like a plasticine tabard my suggestion was that some men look like they're taking an imprint when they hog women memory foam man really tight and it's like they've got a plasticine tabard that they can consult after and maybe even take some sort of mold from

they could 3D print the woman but I um you know those that's horrible but you know those things you know the slippery when wet yellow plastic things you get in shopping wet floors I'm just thinking of an album what's an album called Slipply Man Wear Yeah that's Bon Jovi Okay fine

I think there this is a Dubloin-Tong I don't like it It's a Dubloin-Tongue That one Whereas the Sliberra and Wet sign It's very very business-like But you know how that is formed By two things

That's how I hog You keep it away Feet apart Yeah shoulders touch but nothing else some people get very hippie with their hugs some people there's a lot of pelvis action and I don't need that part of you like hugs

I think hugs we're in a sort of Weimar Republic moment of hugs Where there's an inflation Hugs are being used for non-hug events Whoa I don't like hugging People hug to say hello and I think that's absolutely ridiculous I don't want to be touched by anyone Ever again

Ever again And I'm happy to hug my friends, but I wouldn't hug you or you. No, that would be mad. Because it would be like, why would, that is true. You're placing your entire body face to face. Yeah. Okay. Okay, fine.

I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I wouldn't choose it with anyone, would you? You go over a handshake? Yeah. I don't like that either. Elbow? I shouldn't have said that because I handshaked with the owners here at EH3 studios.

We shaked handsh when I met you. Yeah. But I don't want to hug you, that's not. Yeah, but all I'm thinking after that is not what a nice lady. It's sanitised, sanitised, sanitise, sanitise. Really? Yeah. I'd just wipe my son's bum as well.

Oh, gosh. Just with the hand. I didn't have any tissue, so. Yeah. And then I shook your hand. Well, that's the price you pay. It could be worse. It could be worse.

But give me a moment. Pencil and paper for a moment. Yeah, well, I did, I shook hands with the guy. from EH3. So you just like to say hello verbally? Yeah, because when it all went out with COVID, I thought I'm hoping this never comes back, the handshaking. And now it's come back, as you say, people hog.

Kiss, they kiss. Not even the sign of peace at Mass. You were pleased about the lack of sound of peace. No, I'm quite, I don't. I like, I still tried to get out of the sign of peace. And then you shake hands and say, peace be with you. What's that? At mass.

God, heard of them? Yeah. So you say we will now offer it to the... All right, all right. Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I feel this is not going to go well. It's okay. I just ignore him.

Okay. I love him. What God? Yeah. And he loves me. And he loves you even though you don't like him. I don't mind him. Yeah.

I've got no problem with God. Okay. But... Or she? There is a bit. I didn't say nothing. Well, God could be. I just said God.

Okay. I think God didn't know. you think God's what? A woman? I had a little joke about that at one point and of course God's a woman. Have ever seen a man get that angry about an apple? You fucking whack that.

I think we should end on that. That's really good. I'm going to end on it. You're a one. Victoria's been saving that for two episodes. He thinks, okay. He's cheeky. I'll spend most of the time plugging my sitcom

and then I'll have a big laugh at the end. It's called Rewarding. Rewarding. Yeah. Don't forget to wish mine. Mine's called The Rapture. I've already.

I've already been paid, so it has been rewarding already. Okay, fair enough. The next episode of Frank Skinner's radio days is out on Wednesday. We're back in 2014. The gang have been transported to Manchester. God, even then, everything's fucking Manchester. And I'm right with it.

And I've broke. I'm not. The long hand of burning. Because the second biggest city in, in, in England is Birmingham. That's just that's where you go now. That's half people attending conferences. That doesn't count.

No. They're not local. No, not true. That is not true. But it's been completely overlooked. They've gone to third place. Yeah, I mean, it is shit. It isn't.

It's not shit. It's actually lovely. It is. It's great. Shut your face, Victoria. Shoot your face. Okay, we'll end on that then. Not the laugh.

But the telling the guest The shot his face He asked for it though Okay We'll be back next week With a brand new show Which they used to say on

Deputy Dogg Deputy Dogg Yeah D-A-WG Yeah It's a Frank Skinner podcast A new

when a change is blowing. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. I'm not totally sure how it's going. Thanks for listening to the podcast. Make sure to like and follow so you never miss an episode. And if you want to get in touch, you can email the podcast via Frank Off the Radio at Avalonuk.com.