The Frank Skinner Show - Frank’s Uneven Shoulders

Episode Date: April 30, 2026

Frank and Emily are joined by Steve Hall for today's show. Frank pitches his new app idea, Steve and Frank discuss gigging together and there's a surprise poem from Frank about South West Water. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Welcome aboard via rail. Please sit and enjoy. Please sit and stretch. Steep. Flip. Or that. And enjoy. Via rail, love the way.

It's Frank Off the Radio. It's the Frankskinner podcast, don't you know? Listening for your footsteps, coming up the drive. And this is Frank Off the Radio. I'm joined by Emily Dean. Steve Hall is with us. Aldi. I'm going to go by it.

Oh, come on, Frank. You can follow the podcast on Exit. I used to play that for me. That was about me. Follow the podcast on X and Instagram. You can be lonely. You can be lonely and surrounded by people. All right, Princess Diane.

You can email the podcast via Frank off the radio, Avalon, UK.com. On the WhatsApp front Now that Frank's not on Just download the podcast Away we go So WhatsApp Frank And lovely and whichever

Speaking of valuable time That's all from us Today Thanks very much for it I don't know who's singing that But I want his number That's my new favourite It's got a bit of Scott Walker

About you know that very melodramatic It's a man who would have smoked a lot And treated me quite badly in the 80s And that's my kink. It's got the 80s bombast to it. It does, yeah. I like 80s bombast. He died recently.

Oh, you know. Oh, man. J.H. Pryden died this week. I've seen quite a lot of the poetry community. Very upset. They are. I think he was a much light bloke. And even the people who loved him most said,

but we couldn't understand the fucking word of his poetry. Oh, really? And I sort of like, He was relentlessly unfathomable, but unashamedly so. Yes, Markey Smith star. Well, no, there was bits of Marky Smith. Someone sent me a recording of, he was the singer with my favourite ever band before, by the way. Sent me a recording where he criticised me quite heavily in a song on stage.

And he did that a lot. Stuart Lee and then sent me one which he criticised him. Yeah, he keeps him Stuart Lee a plagiarising him, doesn't he? Oh, he said, like, I'm a 50-year-old man, he's a 40-year-old comedian, he's ripping off me. Oh, did he? I don't. I miss that one. There was so much bile.

That was his autobiography, wasn't it? So much bile. That's because he was a massive gymnastic fan. I like that. What's her first name? Simone. Simone Biles, is it? Do you know Saman Biles?

She'd open the window. Oh. So what we would say, Talking about our fare, if you can imagine there is such a place as our fair to the likes of us, is, and for me, still a new phenomenon in that I have never, ever built one. And that is the voice, what do you call it? It's all the voice note. And when you say built one, it's not the pyramids. No.

I mean, you just leave one. Well, you say it's not the pyramids, but it is the modern equivalent of the pyramids, I would. Do you find it confusing the concept? I don't find it confusing. I just, even in normal conversation, I tend to drift away at about 20 seconds in. You do sometimes. And someone sending a voice, the impertinence.

I'm thinking I want to hear their voice. It's a hell of a power move. It is an ultimate power move. It is. I demand your attention. Yeah. But when I see a voice thing, a voice note, I think, oh, maybe, maybe tomorrow.

Oh, are you a voice note refusing? Oh, just the commitment level to listen to one is beyond me. You see, I love a voice note, Frank. They've changed my life. Do you send them or receive? Well, I do because I think they're quite anti-aging. I think that makes me look about 10 years younger because I'm leaning into the new technology. Because they don't do, they don't ring each other, do they're the young people?

You know, they just say. Do you leave a concise voice note? No. That's the thing. Hello, have we met? Are you okay? Of course I don't leave a concise voice. The voice notes that really do my head in, the ones where they get distracted while they're talking to you.

They'll be providing some information. They'll be, oh, sorry, I'm just making a cup of tea. Oh, where's that tea bag gone? Yes. And so you're witnessing every tedious minutiae of their life. Steve, you've never received. Why have you invented this charade? I've got a number of friends who I tolerate.

My friend Carl Min. I haven't got past the first phrase. The wonderful comedian Carl means is one of the few people I tolerate sending a voice note. Steve does have a lot of friends. He does. When I was on tour with him, I mean, I don't have many friends. Well, this is the irony. I mean, none.

But, yeah, he is. He's much long. Did the friends turn up on tour then? A couple of them. Yeah, we had to stop. We had to stamp on Steve's comps list because it was getting a bit out of town. Was it getting out of hand? He's so popular, especially when there's three teams.

in the show. We had... We became really popular then. We had quite a detailed philosophical chat late one night in the car. We never in the car. Can we just explain... I got this guy to be my tour. Yes, we should explain what you're talking about. Yeah, we were on tour together.

And I thought I loved those nights in the car when you're chatting and long rambling conversations. I think he was in the car twice on the entire tour. We had a long chat about what mate, what was the difference between a friend and a mate and when you would refer to, because I would sometimes refer to someone as a friend and someone as a mate. And it became this weird kind of detail thing

because I think I've got friends, but I might not have spoken to them for 10 years. All right, I've got friends, we know. Are they still friends if you ever done for 10 years? In my head, yes, but I was... Do you mean living friends? Yeah, living friends, yeah. Okay.

I'm just trying to give you a better excuse for not speaking to them for 10 years. Oh, but I think I'm very much into a... coal. I've done numerous coals. Do you not do a coal? A friend. I don't have enough to call. Oh, do you not? People usually call like rabbits when they're overrunning the terrain. My friends are not overrunny to write. They've got plenty of movement space in a phone booth. Oh, Frank. That's not true. You've got lots of friends. I haven't.

You've got that lovely... You see, you're struggling already. David Badele. He's a lovely friend. David Badele lives in my road. I'd say I've seen four times a year. Okay. This is getting more awkward than I anticipated. But Steve's got a lot of friends.

What does that tell you? People don't like to be challenged. Anyway, carry on. I think this might answer your own question, why you don't have friends? I recommend a call, though. If you could make some friends and then call them. Oh, that seems wrong. No, it's not.

As soon as they become my maintenance, it's gone. Not Benjamin, Britain. Benjamin Bitton, I was thinking. Benjamin. Britain, the composer? Yes, yeah, yeah. Was it Benjamin? Benjamin, yes, Benjamin Britain.

It sounds wrong. It sounds wrong. Yes, you're right. Why does that sound wrong. Is it definitely Benjamin Britton? It sounds like Benjamin Button. But I've got, I feel it's wrong now, and I don't know why. It is Benjamin Britain, but his name has been tarnished by Benjamin Button

and the fact that Benjamin Britain now sounds like a sort of weird reform character. Did they call it Benjamin Button as an homage to Benjamin? I doubt it. They've never heard of the likes of Britain. I doubt that very much. Anyway, Benjamin Britain. Little Britain. He, um...

Don't say anything anyone. No, let's just leave that there. Benjamin Britain used to fall out with his friends quite a lot. In a way, if I may say it, the only gay man, cat. You know how else John fell out with like everybody he knew? I'm talking as if he's dead, he is, and he case anyone's anxious. You know, he's still here? But a lot of people are dead to him.

And Benjamin Britton called them his corpses. Someone said, do you still see Terry? No, he's one of my corpses. In other words, they are. They've gone as far as I'm concerned. Wow. What a guy. Do you know what?

I love Britain now. Yeah? I love that. Could we just use that for them? I've got a lovely sweatshirt. My friend Nigel gave me saying, oh, I love Britain. But no, I love that. The friendship cadaver.

I can work with that. So I don't like getting voice notes, and I've never sent one. My wife received one of her relatives. My wife. She received a 20-minute voice note. Really? That was that. Was it important information?

No, no. It was, they were driving to work. so there was quite a lot of I'm sorry I just need to concentrate on this and it was just a rambling catch-up really that's terrible I go to a lot of trouble with mine I might even do like a run-through beforehand

I might even do my own rehearsal because I think that's called being considerate and that's how you don't make yourself a friendship corpse because I think about it I give it some thought and I'll say you know I keep it like chatty at the beginning I'll go hey darling I hate it already. I like that.

Hey, darling. I say, hey, darling. And then I just think about the rhythm of it, and I'll time it normally as well. Two minutes 30, Frank. Never go beyond that. Do you ever abort it, huh? Do you ever stop it and start again?

All my dentist appointments are at 2000. Oh, God, Frank. Sorry, Steve. Do you ever abort it, Emily? Because I've done that a few times where I think I'm being so boring in the message that I need to have another run up at this. Yeah.

Oh, I've used that dustbin numerous times. The dustbin icon. I can use this moment to announce that I've started a company, my own company, called EmouseG, in which I do vocal emojis for voice. So I just say, thumbs are. And then that just comes in at various times. How do you do the opagee? I don't want to know.

Well, no, I only say. say that. Okay, fine. But I do it as if surprise. Oh, the sheet. Like that. Yeah, I've got a whole load of a talking monkey saying,

and then they did their message. So it's like, okay. So, fingers crossed, it'll be all right. The thing is, that's one of them. I'm doing a little bit like advertised.

Do you use the prayer emoji or do you find that disrespectful? Yeah, I go prayer emo. No, I never say the. word emoji. No, do you find the prayer hands?

Don't plug the rivals. Oh, yeah. Do you find that disrespectful? Not a slogan that they followed in Chicago in the 1920. No. Do you find that disrespectful, Frank? What the prayer emoji? No.

I think it's just people desperate. People acknowledging that there is a God. Oh, that's lovely. Oh. Even when the same thing? OMG, I think I feel the same thing. Do you ever get people reply? If you text them, the ha-ha

that appears on the text that you've sent, and that's their response. He doesn't like that. I've put in a ha-ha. Have you ever received that? It's called a reaction emoji. So, you know, you have the option. You must have had reaction emoji.

The trouble is with the ha-ha-ha response is, I mean, imagine how many of those I get. Oh, Frank, it's so arrogant. So I don't know who they've sent it. I mean, I'm getting maybe 10, 20 of those a dark coming in. How many friends do you have? What are you saying? No, but even like the gas man,

I still acknowledge comedy when you hear it. Sorry, the gas man is the name of my drug dealer. If anyone didn't know that. He doesn't like reaction shots. They're too generic, I think. I don't love it. It's quite a numb thing. If you send something you thought's really witty,

and then they just press a ha-ha, ha. Rather than typing it. It's a numb feeling. Yeah. I want to know. I've just wondered how you know about this. Oh, my actual word. My actual word.

Don't believe everything you're here, Steve. Oh, my God. It's because I'll take some things. I've sorted you tickets to Frank's tour. And then laughing in anticipation. Well, there wouldn't be when I put the clamp. I had to put the clamp on your... Did you put the clamp?

Well, I didn't put the clamp. Avalon said, have you seen how many fucking free tickets, Steve's trying to get. Did they? And I said, well, I'm staying out of it. Next thing I know, he came in looking hang dog. How many is a lot, too?

They didn't, they don't worry my pretty little head with details. Oh, they get a bit gone with the wind. We let you gentlemen go and talk in the other room. Exactly. We've had around us. It's a bit like, I've got other things to think about it. And I'm deleting my heart at that point. It got out of hand.

That's all I've been told. Really? Oh, Steve, I'm sure he seems a very polite chap. Well, it's quite rare, you know, when you get a gig that's actually definitely worth coming to because sometimes people come to a gig and it might be badly run or whatever. I like this. Whereas, you know, the idea of someone's seeing you in a proper nice theatre. Apart from the Island Man. Don't get me wrong, I consider the temptation.

But I consider the temptation for a ritual slaughter. Frank, I'll hardly put that in the set. I mean, that is ridiculous. Okay. It's all about context. Well, anyway, Steve, what else of your life? I went to a music gig last week. You made us to a lot of gigs.

Which gig was this? She was married as well. Oh, yeah. Did you take your wife for you? No, this was when she was... I have to plead. Do you? I'm able to go off on my own to something.

There's a band that my wife were resolutely not interested in singing called Earthball. playing in Oxford. They are fantastic. But there was a support act, and then musically, the support act was really good. It was like sort of electronic soundscapes.

But they did, it was just a single person. And they did a thing in the set that left the audience thunderstruck. So they had this sort of console that they're making their electronic noises from. And as the song's playing, they out of nowhere, and this is not, fret not,

this is not going anywhere rude. Fretna not. They whipped out from their bag a cucumber and it was wrapped in cellophane, they broke it in half, peeled the cellophon down, and started to eat the cucumber during their set. Is that a spinal tap reference?

Is that? Yeah. That sounds like a smile. Because it was getting utter thunderstruck response from the audience, where they were sometimes doing it into the microphone. Because you know Nigel Tuffanil does that. He takes it through the security thing at the airport and it's a cucumber wrapped in tin foil.

And is that to, pretend that he's better blessed than he actually is. That is exactly why. And then he eats it? I think there is something involving eating it, but I can't, I think maybe there is. Well, it became this fascinating feedback because the audience were openly laughing. The music was good and it slightly ruined this person's gig because the audience were laughing at how weird and misguided and slightly rude. And then every now and then you'd hear the chewing into the microphone, which was especially gross.

and then they'd eaten the first half and then there was a moment where they were clearly thinking do I eat the second half this has been received so badly and they're worried for their nutritional because they then started on the second one and the laugh it got. It's good for you though, isn't it?

Cucumber. Yeah, very healthy, slightly dangerous, quite a moist thing to be eating over electronic equipment. Concomber. It's not that moist. I hate the way the French call it concombra. Why change the one word? Just stick with ours.

What about? Concombrus. Anana. Anana. So you think, oh, I know this one. No, it isn't. It's fine. That's just the trap.

Okay. What's the other one? Earthball. Yeah, so they're great. There's a really brilliant music website, The Quietus. Oh, yeah. Do you're familiar with that? And it was like their second best album of last year.

What's the Quietest? Sounds like Robert Harris novel. I think it's sort of load of ex-enemy writing. who then started their own slightly more learned website. Are Earthball? Would I like them? No, no, they're very, they're quite, no. They are similar to My Bloody Valentine's. It's like, it's very much a sonic assault.

It's the first time in ages, apart from My Bloody Valentine's, it's the only time I've ever needed to ask for earplugs from behind the bar. Frank might like it then. He likes that kind of thing. They're absolutely brilliant. I like stuff that hurts. You do. End of quote. It's the Catholicism.

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Me and Steve actually did a gig together. Well, we did, I suppose, two gigs, but they're on the same day. So that's still two gigs, two different audiences. Okay. How was it? It was... Did you show a dressing room? No, no, no.

All right, calm down, dear. No, we didn't. We didn't. I was filming, I was filming my last tour. That was the last tour show And Steve went on and got the audience He was my fluffer Is that what they call them?

Yeah, exactly That's what Tom Jones would say Of the husbands of his female audience members No I pump up the tyres They ride the bike Oh, Tom I know

It was a different time We didn't know There's a thing in horse breeding They have a horse that goes into the very, very point And then it's dragged away Imagine that for a terrible job. And then the thoroughbred comes in and just finishes the job. Yeah, that's bleak.

Anyway, back to Steve. It's bleak, but it's a fine analogy. So, yeah, I, you know, I went on and did the show. I've done 165 times. I hadn't done it for a bit, so it still felt quite fresh and exciting. The audience like it, I bet they did. They laughed. Yeah, it's a bit different, a bit different when you're being filmed from just doing it live.

In what way? It's a bit like when you're driving and you see a police car in the rearview mirror. I see that. Just think about it a bit more, whereas normally I just flow like... I get it. It's a bit mirrors in the bedroom. Yeah, I've never tried mirrors in the bedroom. I think I accidentally saw one of my acts in a mirror. and I'd say it was an enhancement.

But when I've watched some of the video, it was nice, it was a live gig, but it was also a TV show. So there was people who come in and say, would you like anything, Frank? And I'd say, yes,

I'll have bang, bang cauliflower from Wagamama, and then they'd come back with bang, bang cauliflower. I like that. I particularly liked. Your walk-on music was different. and it had been on the tour.

And I didn't know what the music was, but I really really liked it. Well, I assume it will be the fall. No, it was a lot. Well, this was thing. So it was this really brilliant burst of heavy metal, but it's really brilliant, really thumping, thunderous, exciting thing for Frank to walk out to.

And then I was chatting to print, and it turned out the author of said music. Hmm. I don't know if I want to say. Oh. Okay. No, I think I'll have to check with him first. Oh, okay.

Okay. It was written by a significant person. Was it? Oh, I'm dying. This is great. I'm dying to know. Anyway. But we won't go into it.

I watched myself back on the video. I went into the edit. And I don't know if you ever noticed, but one of my shoulders is higher than the other. Have you ever noticed that? Absolutely not. No. No, I can notice it.

I'll be honest with you. It's been pointed out to me. by several bespoke Taylor's in my glory I know that. I remember a woman saying to me, did you have a very heavy satchel when you're at school? Oh.

And I thought, why would anyone be asking me that? And then it steadily dawned on me. Anyway, I watched this thing and it's really pronounced. What the shoulder? In the recording. Oh, man. It is honestly like, I don't know if you've seen film

of Anthony Shares Richard. Oh, God, Frank, it's not that bad. It really is Richard the third. Honestly, if I'd have come on and have gone, now is the winter of our discontent.

A glorious summer by the son of York. Anyone in from York? It was like that. It's like that if he did he. Do you know what? I'll sort you out with a little shoulder pad next time.

Because that's all you need. You just pop it in your job. jacket. It just looked at me like, do you remember those barometers you could get? There were a little house. And the man and the woman came out. And the man and a woman. It depends on the weather. Either the man came out or the

lady. I felt like if it got a bit colder, my other shoulder would have gone up and that one would have gone down. But it was interesting to watch. I might get some I might get a bit of extra sympathy for it. You could go on the last leg.

Yeah, I think people will think I'm looking a bit last leg. I'm serious. I don't know what details you were allowed to say because the way it was shot, it looked cool. It looked cool as anything. Except for the dislocated shoulder. Yeah, but I think I've always been very unsure about good looking comedians. Bat me up on this.

What do you mean unsure about them? Well, I, you know, I've seen posters in Edinburgh where people, there's people looking, you know, stunning on their photo. And I always think, oh yeah, I think everything was fucking funny if I looked like. Of course, easy for you to laugh. Do you think I'm going to go and sit and watch someone who looks like you laughing just but twisting the knife? Like watching those pictures of lottery winners holding off a glass of champagne.

and kicking into the air. Do you know what I think is cruel is that it's taking away your jobs, you guys? No offence. When these good-looking young ones do this. I'll tell you what I liked about watching the edit, I thought, you know, if ever it goes wrong, I mean more wrong,

and I have to go back to my bed seat in the West Midlands. I won't be as a peacock amid sparrows. I will slot in. I could be lit. What else? bow at the bar, 20 marlboroughs, and no one would even question my legitimate right to be there. You've not had veneers. No?

So that would be fine, wouldn't it? That's correct. You've not had the shoulder surgery. I think your shoulders look lovely, Frank. I'm looking at the shoulders now. That's never even a clue. No, that's a lie, Steve. You can see it quite noticeably.

Don't lie, Steve. Even I've never said that to Steve. I've never called him a liar outright. Actually, I probably have. It's only because you're sitting in that position. No, I think on stage, because I've got the mic in my hand, it's all very much emphasised. But there's something great about Richard III.

Richard III is quite funny in the early stages. It just looks like he's worked in a bit. It turns out the play was like a work in progress gig, but now he's fucking rocking. Well, didn't because Johnny Rotten, one of the documentaries about the sex pistol was they interpose footage of Richard the 3rd and Johnny Rotten. He's got similar.

Yeah, but he didn't have the hump. I've got the hump. You've always got that hump. Frank, I've got one foot bigger than the other if it makes you feel better. One is size three and a half and the other... Seven and a half. The other is size four. It's like those signs where they tell you which car has right of why.

When you saw the souls of Emily's shoes, it's like a walking right of why I've signed. Three and a half and size four. Well, that's nothing in it. Well, it can be difficult with shoes sometimes. I'm just saying, I'm not saying I'm last leg. I'm just saying I understand what it's like. I think the comedy is enhanced by my...

Asymmetry. My old sketch, one of the best reviews we ever got, I was in a sketch show and we were described as visually pitiful genius fools. And we loved the perfect balance of that. We'll take the compliment, but visually pitiful. And everyone who read it, yeah, that's that accurate. Yeah. Visually pitiful.

Imagine if they left genius fools off the poster and that was the only review, visually pitiful. What bother with visually? That's what I say. Let's par it right down Oh dear I do want to address some correspondence from the outside world

Should we have time today Are we comfortable moving over to that? Absolutely Okay We've heard from Benedict from Bourneville I love him already He's got a Pope's name He's got a Pope's name

I like the name Benedict Frank What if his son is Britain That's really going to confuse it, isn't he? It's from Bourneville, but he can smell Cadbury World when he opens his window in the morning. Dear Frank, Emily, and the special guest.

You're happy what you got to do with that? I'll take that, yeah. Okay, not what we called you earlier. Emily mentioned about her builders calling Ivy Ivory. I think you were there for that, Steve. When I was in church one Sunday morning, nice friend of you.

I love any anecdote that starts. A Benedict in church, I think so, Frank. Yeah. It came to the peace. As Frank will know. Yes, when you all shake hands. Right, and this is a Catholic thing, is it, I presume? Well, I don't know if it happens in the Anglican church.

Okay. They probably can't reach the person that's closest to them. As Frank will know, the standard greeting is... Peace be with you. Exactly. And as I said it, to an elderly man, behind me, who I'd never met before, he replied, pleased to meet you. I must have misheard, have they?

Like Emily, I wasn't sure if he'd said it on purpose or not. But in my case, I had to wait another week before finding out. He was there the following week. He was there the following week. And his response... Let's hope it'd gone home in the interim. This time, his response... to peace be with you was pleased to meet you.

I didn't correct him as it was almost a better greeting somehow. Should I have, Frank? I've never seen him since, though. Best wishes, Benedict from Bourneville. Over to you, Frank. Well, if you are a church goer, I'm afraid there are regular people who sit around you who you've never seen since. So to speak, that is the nature of the earth.

But I like, peace be with you. I think there's some love here about the sharing. Because there's a slippery slope. If we start to accept please to meet you within a year, they could be going, what's it? Yeah, I don't know. I must admit, I avoid the handshake generally. I like to bear or even put my hand on my heart and bear.

You bow. But ever since COVID. Did they stop it during? COVID then the handshake. Yes. Yeah. And I don't really like shaking hands. I don't either. I loathe it. I, uh, or hogging. I don't like it. I know I make you hug. I do apologize. No, it's all right. But I love you. I'm fine with it. Also, you know, you're, you're coming at me from a much lower angle. Okay. But, um, you know, you're not, we're not, we don't

have our faces in each other's faces. No, exactly. But, um, now I thought maybe we'd got away with handshakes forever with COVID. I thought it was one of the very few positives that come out of that terrible time. They've returned. When I've been to church with you, I think we've hugged, and I thought that that was coming.

I thought that was what you wanted. I'm now thinking, did I look like I was instigating the hug? I just felt sorry for you. Oh, Frank, come on. Come on. It brings out the best of interest. It's a time of charity.

It is. I think I'll go a few 50 face So let's find you a soup kitchen I didn't think that That's too far We've heard No but yes No but yeah but yeah but I'm not happy with that

No but yeah but Hi there long time listener First time WhatsApp Well to you guys anyway I like the precision of this person Frank's story about the water police made me chuckle. I think you were here for this, Steve,

when Frank had had the water man come around saying, I'm afraid you've been using water for four people in a household of three. Yeah, what's going on? And take this egg timer. And we go over us three egg timer. One for each shower. Yes, there's been a lot of responses to that story. I was surprised he didn't give us one with the inference that we should shower together.

My experience is completely the opposite. it. I have let a building company piggyback off my supply for the last two years. I don't know if this is strictly legal. And there may be a reason why the name and address is withheld. And they pay my costs, my water bills, for the privilege of doing so. Every quarter, Southwest Water, invoiced me. Is this become a poem? Or is that? Southwurst Water Invoiced me with how many... Even though they hadn't taught.

And then while speaking to my daughter, one of them reached out and caught her. They were very glad that brought her. Go on, carry on. Edward Lee. South West Water invoice me, stop it, Frank, with how many units have been used

and what the usage is equivalent to. Apparently, my household of three takes somewhere in the region of 700 baths every three months. Oh, okay. Not once have Southwest Water contacted me to see why my usage has skyrocketed. That's not fair. Nor have they been out and about in my area hunting for leakages.

It's almost like they couldn't give... And then it says air to oots. Is that one of your phrases? They couldn't give what? Two hoots, I know. Air, two hoots, it says. I don't know. Maybe that's a typo.

I just assumed it was Birmingham. If it looks like a typo, I sometimes think it is. You're from Birmingham? Yes, I don't, oh, maybe this is a Birmingham scandal. Anyway. It's not, it's south of, southwest. Southwest, southwest. So.

Oh, what southwest? Devon? Yeah. What's south? Hold on, I'll get you. I mean, I've got a compass on your phone. That's so Dave Maggie Smith in downtown Abbey. What praise Southw?

Shortly after she said, what is a weekend? What is southwest? Devon. Yeah, definitely. It would include Devon. What is Birmingham then? West Midlands. Okay, West.

Just. Okay, fine. Anyway, thank you, Frank, Emily and A.N. Ober. That's strange to me. So, Frank, they're coming around to you. Yeah, but this is Thames Waterborne. Okay. They've actually started, I don't know, I see him my road's been,

weeping for, I mean, years on and off. Just water just emanate on the time. If David, he'll move in. Yeah, exactly. And they've finally arrived this week to do something about me. But we'll see. That's the power of this podcast. Yeah, Matt, do you think it's...

Do you think they'll be listening? No. No one's listening. Oh, Frank. It's so negative. Honestly. It's true. Now, I've got something else I want.

want to tell you, but I might have to wait because I don't therefore have enough time. Someone is wondering if you've got dyspraxia. Oh, what is that? No, they're just saying it in a really nice way, and I think you maybe should look into this. Go on. Has Frank ever looked into whether he has dyspraxia

or not? This is regards to his sense... Well, I've never heard of dyspraxia, so... No. It's with regard to his sense of direction problems. Oh, right. I found out when I was 32, it's very related to never crawling as a child? Yes.

And are the symptoms of what used to be called clumsy child syndrome? Yeah, well, I knew about the not. Yes. What do I gain from the diagnosis? Absolutely nothing. Oh, this is the thing. You all gain absolutely nothing, Frank. It might put a few tickets on the Edinburgh sales.

Well, yeah. And in fact, this person says Pierre might have another neurodiversity comrade and never knew. I could call it this Franks here, for sure. What do you think? I'm just saying it could go in your social media bio. Me like pour it over an out as they. Because what you'd have, Frank, is comedian, dysprax it. That's what you're meant to do now.

Is it? Yeah. That's what a lot of people do, don't they, Steve? Yeah. I mean, it's quite a heated thing about when, you know, when the description is used in exchange for a persona or a personality. Yes, exactly. Identity.

Well, I mean, I may have it. But I don't need it, is what I'm saying. No, don't need it. I don't need the diagnosis. No. Can they give me pills? It means I'll be able to find my way around. Pills, not the 60s.

No, exactly. Look, listen, the next episode of Frank Skinner's Radio Day. Can I say, by the way, that the next podcast we do will be the last podcast with Jenny foot, who's been the assistant on these podcasts forever. And we're all really sad to lose it. But I'll be honest with you, she's got a better job. She has. Simple as that.

She really has. But it means that this week, she's written. my note for the end of the show and her handwriting is beautiful which I didn't know. I never really noticed. Do you know she's very artistic? She is very artistic yeah. She put it in the Redingbrose type. Put that in your bio. So the next episode of Frank Skinner's Radio Days is out on Saturday. We're still in 2013 and this time I'm asking people to

text in who takes more than six sugars in their tea. I'd like to know what the response was to that and then if you want I'll listen to Frank Skinner's radio days. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. A new winter change is blowing. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. I'm not totally sure how it's going. Thanks for listening to the podcast.

Make sure to like and follow so you never miss an episode. And if you want to get in touch, you can email the podcast via Frank off the Radio at avalonuK.com. Instacart knows that some people go bananas about getting the perfect, well, banana. Some want them green, some want them ripe, some want them ready right when they hit their doorstep. But with Instacart's preference picker, available at most retailers, you can choose to get your groceries just the way you like.

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