The Frank Skinner Show - Pub True

Episode Date: November 3, 2025

This week Frank was on the receiving end of a reveal gag and has been touring. There's also a case of nominative determinism, vampires and Frankenstein. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Plus tax at participating restaurants in Canada for a limited time. It's Frank off the radio featuring him and that posh ladyo and the one with the French name from South Africa came they're all here up in racketeering. If the groups had to go back to work, what would the rolling stones do?

Imagine them arriving late. The foreman wouldn't off create. You can't have your cake and eat it too. Okay, this is Frank Off the Radio. I'm joined by Emily Dean and Pierre Novelli. Follow the podcast on X and Instagram. You can email the podcast via, I say via, Frank Offerradio, Avalon, UK.com, and as for WhatsApp,

If you want to talk about sonnets or haikus or free verse or bullets, if you've ever been given someone else's award trophy, then you should message 0745-741-77-6-9. I guess that's just the summer where we all learned who we were. We were never the same again. It really is. You've got to be careful, you know, set off the smell. alarms when that's up, just instinctively holding up your lighter.

Yeah, it's so Dawson's Creek. Yeah. Oh, yeah, Dawson's Creek, which I've never seen. Have you not, Frank? It's not for us. It's for the millennials. No, I don't care for things I haven't seen. That's a lovely attitude to life.

There's a lot of... How many rich experiences you must have? I know, but I have. I don't care for things I haven't seen. I'm thinking of ghosts. specifically. Oh, I see. No. No. Oh, no. Speaking of Rich, I had a letter.

A check-through from my agent. I had a letter arrive. I'm going to read the opening line. I'm going to read it. I photographed it especially. What does it say? Come on. It says, dear Frank Skinner, block capital, also. Oh, that's a sign of a good letter. We will pay a single lump sum of £200 into your bank. or building society account, building society.

How old do you think I have already put my name in block capital? Frank, this kid. Can you hear me, lop? Who's in a building society now? Well, that's what they used to say in the 70s. Yeah. Yeah. So we put a lump sum of 200 men to your bank or building society.

And then, etc. So I thought, and the headline is your 20s, 25, winter fuel payment will be £200. Winter fuel payment? Yeah. Oh, do you get one of those? Is that a pensioner thing? It's a pensioner thing.

Everyone gets one. So I was thrilled. Sure. No, I don't know if you've, I, there was a time when I was making television programs. So, hold on, does that mean the Duke of Westminster gets one then? Yes. Hold on, I'll come to this. Oh, okay, fine.

When I was making television programs and interviewing new directors, what I would ask them is how they would shoot a reveal joke. Right. Now, a reveal joke, I'll give you a classic example. In Faulty Towers, when the car won't start, Basil Faulty walks off. And then he walks back with a large branch and starts whipping the car angrily. Now, most directors who don't have comedy in their bones,

would have followed Basil to the tree, watched him tear down the branch and then watch him walk back angrily. But I don't know, directed faulty towers, but the camera just sits still on this car for an age. And you think Basil's gone and suddenly appears to this branch. And it's brilliant.

And that's how to shoot a reveal gag. It's just fantastic. So anyway, I got that. I was on the boat, and I told you about last podcast. I got that from my personal assistant and I was delighted to want to coin. I got another one the next day

that says because your income is over, blah, blah, blah, you will not be receiving. That's on the other side of the letter. This is a reveal gag from the government. and my PA has just thought I'll give it a bit of help by sending the front one day

and the bat she hadn't noticed the bat because their headline is you will receive 200 pounds they've formatted that badly so I mean I bought three bags of car

yesterday with it and now I find I have we got for your steamship I have to say a pensioner like cheering and waving a to fuel allowance check while on a boat is the kind of cartoon

you get on the front of the economist or something. Exactly. Time for means testing. The new statesman cartoon. King Charles waving one from the carriage. So, oh, no, but don't tell me I've got one and then on the back of the same piece of paper.

That's so cruel because you've got your hopes up. I was thinking. They did send you some paper to burn. Yeah, they did. A bit of fuel. That's true. I'll be glad of that in the cold, cold month. Put another letter in the grate.

You know, you get to my eyes a bad winter. Could be it. Oh, fine. That's so depressing. I read, you think that's depressing. I read the other day that the next Doctor Who will be the 2026 Christmas special. Yeah? And I thought, oh, well, this is a good while at last.

Well, 181 has reminded us you do realize next year is 30 years of 30 years of hurt. Oh, that's right. Are you 30 years since? I presume? Yes, because it'll be 60 years of hurt. Oh, don't. That is depressing.

We scan so well. People have said, well, you've got to do another version. Yeah. Because of that scan. But we're not doing another version. Okay. You heard it here first. Well, you say that.

But now you've got those winter fuel payments. Well, David's going to have to cover his. He always in cover. will be too much as well. Yeah. Oh, that's true, I should think so, yeah. Yeah, the Bedeleyn's going to winter fuel tour. Yeah?

Do comedians still do that? Guys, do comedians still do that? Willie Nelson did the, whatever they called it, is it the IRA in that? No, it's not the IRA. It's not the IRS. He has a massive tax bill and was going to go to prison. So he got some friends together and they toured to pay off the tax. I was just going to say, is that still a thing?

Peter Kay would do that where, you know, need a new extension or something at all. Get great house to. Yeah, they would be in sarky. Yes, exactly. But this actually kept Willie Nelson out of prison. Oh.

I don't know you're thinking. That sounds crazy. I'm crazy for a feeling so long. Anyway. I had a question about the song you sang at the start. The Rolling Stones, if they had to go to work again. He said the foreman wouldn't half create. Yeah.

What does that mean? It means it'd be really, it'd cause a big fuss. It's quite a sort of northern thing now. Is it? I think it's quite sort of coronation street. Oh, don't create so I think of it like that. It's from a band called the Barron Knights. And this was in the days when copyright was, it didn't really exist.

So they would do those linking bits and then they would do change the words to pop songs. So they had the groups getting called. up, for example, with the Rolling Stones saying, don't want to join the Royal Navy, I don't want to go to Hong Kong, don't want to get my hair cut, baby, I want to keep it long, I want to keep it long, I want to keep it, it was stuff like that, very popular, the Baron Knight, still do corporate, I think, and you can tell them about people. You can tell them about people.

You sound like your manager. Yeah, you can tell them about people who work there. and they'll do a song about them. Oh, they do bespoke. Oh, that's gold in the corporate world. Oh, all they want is about when Dave pissed in the plant pot in Bermuda that time. Big fun song about Sandra from Accounts.

Oh, man, I mean, that has you said. They want that more than they want red, wrong. And that's saying something. We've also heard from Ben, who says, Dear Frank off the radio, frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn and Frankenstein. Make of that what you will, which moniker belongs to which of us. I think I'm Frankenstein. I've got to be frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.

Because I'd be on the receiving end of it. That's what Rhett Butler said, been gone with the wind. I'm the recipient of that, maybe. And if we're being accurate, then they're joking that I am a distinguished German scientist. Yes, I'm afraid. You got that vibe, though. Yeah. You didn't say Frankenstein monster.

No, although I... No, we did talk, though, about me and you doing Frankenstein and Edinburgh. You was the monster of me as Frank. Oh, my God, Frank. I still think that could be great. I think it would be really good. During the month of October, I like to answer the door with a... Yeah, exactly.

Which is a bit of fun, a bit of Halloween fun. You see, but I prefer Oddbaud in Carry On Screaming. Have you ever seen Oddbord? Carry on Scream at the worst. Oddbod says things like, because he's a monster... What, Oddbod? Yeah, the way they just stick stuff on him, like patches of stuff. He was sort of a Frankenstein monster, wasn't he?

But also, he hadn't kind of worked out his character, the actor. Is Alfred Marks? I can't remember. Or Bernard Breslau. Bredd Breslau, it might be. And he would just say, so he'd go, ah, make noises. And then when she was talking, he'd just want to go, mm, mm, eh. He said, you haven't really, monsters don't do that, really.

Considerate nodding. Yeah, he's considerate monster. Sort of go, huh, uh-oh. He was like, Like a monster hosting a podcast where they interview people. And that's when I thought I'd just have to start my own business. Yeah, exactly. It was a bit like that.

She says, darling, I'm afraid you'll have to leave the cast and he goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. They're sort of thoughtful monster. Frankenstein's business secrets. Frankenstein interviews sort of Bill Gates and... Frankenstein's monster. No, yeah, sorry. Frankenstein's monster interviews, the person who invented.

you know, duke. I'd love Frankenstein monster to go on Stephen Bartlett podcast. Diary of a CEO. So you're actually put together from lots of different people. Wow. And have there been any aspects of being a monster that you found difficult? Hold on, who's asking who? Oh, dear.

Anyway. This all came about from Ben. We were mid-Benz email, Frank. Oh, yes. And Ben says, I've lived in Asia for many, many, many years. Keep it precise, Ben. And I'm current... Well, there might be tax things.

We don't know. And I'm currently living in Guangzhou. So please consider me as your Asia correspondent. Lovely. Where is Guangzhou? Guangzhou. Pierre, do you know? China.

Oh, yeah. Read Chinese-japanish-Japanese characters. We talked about that. last week briefly. The Japanese characters are called kanji and are based on the Chinese characters which are called Hanzi or Hanzu. Do you know

this? I said last not last episode but the one before I mistakenly said the Chinese characters were kanji but it's... Okay. Well he said Japanese characters are more complex because mainland China simplified a lot of the original characters to raise the literacy rate. Nice.

Which I think is... Nice. We don't hear enough about the big heart of the Chinese. in his government. Yeah. You should look up a picture. Hello. Hello, by the way. Hello to everyone over there.

Sponsorship available. Well, Ben continues. He says, as an aside. Ben continues, isn't it? The next time I'm going to be in my name in hotels, my false name. Yes. Ben continue. I love that.

As an aside, the North Korean leader is Kim Jong-un with a hard J. He's saying this because he says the amount of people who say Kim Jong-un-un. drives me crazy. He's not Spanish, for heaven's sake. All right. That would be Kim Hongun. And he's also told us, one other thing on the subject

of autobiography titles, there's a biography of Kim Jong-un called Dear Reader. Is that? Yeah, I love that. That's good for that. Not an autobiography, a biography. Barography, yes. He's gone a bit Jane Austen.

I love it. It's not a joke about how people in that, part of the world sound air room. No, Frank. Are you sure? Oh, no, no, this is genuine. It's not an RL joke.

It sounds very suspicious. It's not. Dear reader, a Kim Jong-un. A bunker of one's own. Yeah. No, it is, it is his, no, it definitely is. Come, I've filled out in you.

When there's, uh... No, well, it's coming up, but I'll tell you what. I'll tell you something that I think has genuinely happened. What? I think this has genuinely happened. I think there's been a typo. Because I think surely the autobiography

would be dear leader. That is my point. Yeah. But I don't think he meant it. No. It's all right. We've all got a bit anxious. It's his fault.

Look, he's living in Asia and I don't think he'd be offensive if he wasn't. I'm not suggesting. He's just quoting a book title. He has written it incorrectly, Ben. Can we show it to subject soon, though? It's been very mortifying, then, for all of us.

As a result of your error. Fun fact. You can be dyslexic in Chinese but not in English. What do you mean? Your dyslexia is not across everything. So someone who's dyslexic in English might not be if they learn Chinese. Oh. It's different.

Is that to do with left to right, not top to bottom? They're not sure. It's just different parts of the brain, yeah. They? The good scientists of mainly Hong Kong. How weird is that, though? You'd think it would be across the board. It is.

It's not as weird as people getting a head injury and suddenly speak fluent Chinese that never spoke it before. Is that true, Frank? Do you believe it? I read it in the newspaper, but is it true? I think it's pub true. I love Pop True. I miss Pop True. You see, the mobile phone has killed Pop True forever.

Yes, because we can fact-check everything. And I think I was one of the great champions of Pop-Truths. Were you? Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, get me on the old Bermuda tea. The conspiracy theories. Yeah. Yeah, you know, if all the Chinese jump up in the same time,

the tidal wave will engulf the United States of America. That was PubTrue. Yes. Oh, yes. That was very PubTrue. Yeah. Is Pop True different to Urban Myths then? Or is it, do they inhabit, are they in the same part of the end-di-bra.

Well, no, because urban myths are often a story, aren't they? Whereas Pop-True was a fact. Right. It was not a fact. Trivia. Trivia flavoured. Well, it was as if you knew, as if you'd had a quick flick through

a new scientist on you eye into the pub and gathered some interesting stuff. Me and some of the other guys at the lab. Although I heard a fact last night, which is a fact, apparently. Where were you when you heard this fact? I was watching television. Okay.

And it said that that Winston Churchill flew to Russia during the war to be nice to Joseph Stalin. And the plane flew particularly high. Right. And they needed oxygen at times. And he had a special mask made, customised masks

so he could smoke a cigar while he was wearing an oxygen mask. No. On a plane as well. On a plane. That's great. I kind of love that. You know Simon Cowell?

Because you have to help your child to their cigar first. Or is it the way around? You like yours first, then you like your child's dog. And you have to put them out for landing. Yeah, exactly. You know, Simon Cowell had a special air filtration system in his house.

And this isn't PubTruths. I know someone who went there because he liked a chain smoke. But he was aware that it made the house smell and with these LA furnishings as well. The air filtration system, it's the way to go. Well, John Wayne, John Wayne had a station wagon and the area, the roof above the driving seat

was higher than the rest of the car so he could wear a stetson. He was driving. Again, that is, I don't think that's Bob true. I think that's true. Do you think you would have got on with John Wayne? Do you think he was quite... Well, I love John Wayne.

I know he had his... He was a bit on the right. It's a bit further than the right than me. But, you know, I don't... In America, doesn't really matter, does he? Okay. Yeah. Also, I've got a spoken word album by John Wayne.

I didn't know he did a spoken word. Yeah. I don't know. did any albums. He says things like when I hear the word republic I feel like a man feels when he watches his

son shave for the first time. It's very moving. There's one called the hyphen and he says there's a little devil called the hyphen that's caused a lot of trouble in this world and I thought he says John Wynneau on punctuation

And, of course, he says, there's no such thing as an African-American or an Italian-American as just an American. So it's that hyphen that joins together, he doesn't like. I never know when to use it or I should start a new sentence. John, don't go too far. I know what I'm doing, Pilgrim. With Amex Platinum, $400 in annual credits for travel and dining means you not only satisfy your travel bug, but your taste buds too. That's the powerful backing of Amex.

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A new era of fitness is here. Introducing the new Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus, powered by Peloton. iq built for breakthroughs with personalized workout plans real-time insights and endless ways to move lift with confidence while peloton IQ counts reps corrects form and tracks your progress let yourself run lift flow and go explore the new peloton cross-draining tread plus at one peloton We got some, a good example of nominative determinism from Claire. Hi Frank M and Pierre, a bit of nominative determinism for you.

My husband's name is Nick Hems, and he is a men's personal stylist. That is very fine. That's great. Didn't there used to be a pub called De Hems, which was based on some Dutch beer? It's in Soho, isn't it? Is it? Isn't a big Dutch pub that's sort of between Chinatown and... I remember doing a gig there, and there was a couple of Dutch guys in the audience,

and water started coming through the ceiling. And I said, can you stick your finger in that? And it got a big laugh, and I thought, I'll never, ever use that joke again. It's gone forever. You're not tempted to figure out the rainiest time of the year in the Netherlands. No, they'd probably fixed it. Pop over there for a quick tour. So I'm touring myself.

Are you? I didn't know that. I'm a support act for the lovely eggs. Oh, are you still doing that support work? Yeah. Well, I like supporting back because you watch, you do your gig and then you can watch your favourite band, which is great. I mean, I say that.

If it goes well, you can do that. So what sort of venues are you doing? If it goes badly, you have to go straight home. Well, yes, you have a policy where if you've decided it's gone, badly, you have to slink away. Well, I don't... If I stand in a club where I've just gone really badly, the people around me will also feel embarrassed.

They'll feel it from... Even if they don't know I'm there, they won't know why they're feeling it, but they will feel profoundly ashamed. They will. And not know where it's fucking come from. They'll play Red Bull or something like that. But it will be my presence.

Yes. I think that's true. I don't want to do. One guy came up to me. I did the garage. Do you know that in Highbury? Yes, I do. And that gig went very nice, and the audience were lovely. And I went to the back to watch the lovely eggs afterwards. And a man came up to me. He said, I came all the way from Germany for this gig. Obviously not to see the lovely eggs, not to see me.

And he got a mask on, you know, a COVID mask. surgical mask thing and I thought well you only wear those if you've got COVID why else do you wear one just out and about

paranoia so he said could I have could I have a selfie and I said yeah sure so he put his arm around me and he hung up me and then he went oh hold on pulled his mask down oh no

for the selfie oh no thanks for that I'm such a big fan. Can I quickly cough in your mouth? Yeah, please. Also, that's not going to be a very nice. You'll still see a massive mask under his gym.

Oh, no, exactly. Silly man. Yeah, you should have used that hands free. Oh, Frank. So you like doing the tour then with them? Well, that was really good. I met me wonder, because the crowd, because mixing stand-up music can be quite a risk.

And they were lovely, the crowd. And I did, you know, there's a theory in some radio stations that if the presenters, DJs, whatever you want to call it, if they stand up, that you can feel the extra energy on air. Some presenters do that, don't you? I never did it in 15 years. Well, we might want to think about that. Yeah.

But yeah, that might be one dragged us down. But, I mean, do podcasters stand up? No, I think that you don't need that same level of manic energy if it's not live. Does Stephen Bartlett not stand now he sits? It would be good if he sort of paced while gesturing wildly like a historian dictating a letter. Yeah, that's what he should do. He should walk on down and then his secretary should actually do the podcast. Ask them, read that question back to me.

Yeah, and every podcast ends. yours, etc. Dan Brown, the author, has gravity boots. You'll plug himself into some gravity boots and hang upside down to think of... Is that right? Is they called gravity boots where you hang up... Office, is it American Gigolo?

Yes. Oh, yes. Richard Gia hangs upside down. That's absolutely right. As does he's a gear, of course, obviously. Oh, Frank. Which makes everything look on. Men's genitals upside down.

I have to say that was an iconic moment when he did that. Was it? Everything about it. It was absolute peace. He was in tremendous. He had to toe Armony. Was it trendy to hang upside down at that point? Well, it was after Richard Gere did it.

I don't think it would make me come up with any more ideas. I think it would make me want to come up with an idea so I could not be upside down anymore. He was, well, that would mean that all the best ideas came from Australia. Which we know. And vampires. He was quite trick. Richard Gere, I interviewed him. Oh, was he, Frank?

I thought he'd be great. I started off by Sanat. It's great, you know, that... Was he on the chat show, can I just say? Yeah. And I said, it's great that, you know, a lot of... I think we always think Hollywood people would just dye their hair if they went great, but you've just...

Embraced it. And he said, oh, it's going to be that kind of interview, is he? Did he say that on the show? Yeah. What did you say? Oh, you must say. Yes. Well, what did he mean?

What does that mean? I mean, I mean, I was... I was praising him for his authenticity. A chance you don't often get to do when you interview celebrities of any kind. If I may speak in defensive gear, I think it's because I think he was possibly over-sensitive. You're going to say some people use it for their illnesses.

I was going to say, all right, Pablo Escobar. If I may. If I may speak in defensive gear, my lord. On behalf of my husband, Pablo. My client likes to be more talkative. And he makes so many good plans. when he's up with his friends all night. They've set up so many companies,

wonderful companies, between 2 and 5am. Anyway, I think, in defence of gear, Frank, I think he probably was over-sensitive because he was a good-looking man and he wore his look somewhat like an albatross. You know you get those good-looking people that aren't comfortable with being so good-looking.

Well, I don't know if a Buddhist wants to be good-looking room. This is true. They want to transcend the physical. This is true. But he could have helped that, you know. Robert Patton says, and the same, not comfortable with his looks. How it starts, the styles, lad, he loves being hot.

Now, it's interesting, you mention Robert Pattinson, because I went to a Comic-Con the weekend at the Excel Centre. Because my son's favourite band, one of his favourite bands, Creeper. Do you know Creeper? I don't. Excel's an unfortunate name for a conference centre. Why?

Well, I just think it feels a bit outsize. It is massive. Well, it would be at Excel. It is a giant comic con. Put it this way, when we were racing across for the Creeper Q&A, I saw a 2000 AD store, you know, Judge Dredd. Well, I'm an online subscriber to 2000 AD. So I thought, oh, God, I'll see what, if they got any merch,

you know, going to Judge Dread tea or something. And so we went to the, we did the creeper thing, and after it, we were there for two. I just couldn't find it. I never found it again. It was too big. Yeah, I lost it. I lost 2000 AD.

What a party that was. Robert Pattinson. So Creeper are a sort of vampire band. So they have all that vampire makeup and there's a lot of blood dripping off their mouths and stuff like that. But I've met them a couple of times there. They are really lovely, down to the particulate people.

Well, it isn't we vampire. Even the good vampires in films, it usually quite aloof, troubled, aren't they? They're not normally genial vampire. Genial vampire is quite difficult. Yes. And none of the members of the band were going,

Blur! In between Staple! No. Robert Pattinson was, you know, he was... Not like the Counts in Sesame Street. Ah, ah, ah. But he was troubled, wasn't he? Wouldn't you say?

Yes. Well, I think he was not comfortable. I think he was an introvert who found he had a talent doing an extrovert's job. No, no, I don't mean Robert Pattinson. I mean, his character in Twilight. Well, in real life he was a bit as well. Well, I'd never believe that.

Well, I've met him. He's a charming man. Well, you can be charming and still want to show off. No, he's a bit troubled. Look at me. You can't be a cheerful. How many lives does he ruin? None. Well, what kind of a fucking vampire is it?

It's extended them. You can't have a cheerful vampire. You can't have him in Twilight going, Hello, welcome to the school. You can't. You have to have him frowning and moping in the woods. They have to be morose. I'll tell you what, there was fantastic cosplay at this Comic-Con.

I mean, just incredible. Did you dress up as anything? No. Boz said to me, I could do a very quick mega-mind. And what does that involve looking like? Well, Mega-mind has got a very big giant forehead. I think that was the joke. Oh, that is so cruel.

Yeah. Like when I went to the Frankenstein monster to Jonathan Ross's party. And I said to the makeup woman on the show I was working at the time, do you think you could do me like some bolts or get some, do me a scar and stuff. And she did me these brilliant bolts for my neck. I remember. And a scar and gave me this green ink. And I said, do you think I need like a false head thing?

And she went, no, I think you'll be all right. Thanks. But anyway, I don't know any of them are because they're nearly all anime and stuff like that. So they look fantastic, but they might not look like... And sometimes they do a fun joke where they'll do like a cosplay that's a mixture of the two. Yeah, I didn't get any of those.

It's like, Buzz, for Halloween, he's going as Vince Clotho. Who's that? Well, exactly. Vince Clotho. That's like someone I went to school with. You know, Rick, Murillo. I do. Rick Moranis played a character called Lewis Tolly in Ghostbust. Oh, did he? He's not even playing Louis Tolly. He's playing Louis Tolly when he's

possessed by a demon and then becomes Vince Claudeau. But you know, I have to say, Jonathan Ross would respect that. But nobody will know. Buzz doesn't care that no one will know. I think it's better that no one will know. Because he'll know. Yeah, absolutely. I think it's much better. The true spirit of Halloween. You don't want to go some obvious thing.

I thought I could be Aunt May from the Spider-Man comics. Oh, maybe. She's about my age. You have to try and give Spider-Man sort of worldly advice that's actually towards Peter Parker, but somehow applicable to Spider-Man. Also, you've got to be careful with that, Frank. Why? Well, appropriation and things.

Oh, I think it's all right. No, older, Aunt May, not modern Hispanic art. I don't want to be seen it. No, I just meant dressing as a woman. Oh, I thought you meant I was because being an aunt-tour. Yeah. Or you thought, were you worried Frank would put on a sort of Puerto Rican accent? No, she's American.

No. Also in the films. In the new ones, she's Hispanic though, no. In the, well, they've made her a bit younger and sexier in the films. Of course they are. In the, she looks like she's just finished a large lemon in the comic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She looks like she should be on a jam job.

She's really drawn and gaunt in the comics, white head and white face. She looks like a great depression. photo. She looks like how women were perceived, basically, prior to 2020. She looks like an example of the non-putrification of saints in the Roman catacombs

that one sometimes sees. You're saying she should be wearing a bejeweled golden mask over her eyes. Oh, well, she will be on Halloween. That's how I'm doing it. I've come dressed as Aunt May if she was a Catholic

saint entombed. So we looked at this stall and it was just lightsabers. There must have been 50 lightsabers. I said, I didn't think to the guy, I said, I didn't think there was that many character lightsabers in all the Star Wars. He said, now, some of these are custom lightsabers, so the ones that we've created ourselves. Okay.

And Buzz was like in awe of these things. Boz has got, I think, six lights. In fact, there was a lovely moment when Katz said to me, she was moving, tidying her mom. She said, how many of these space sticks have we got? Space sticks? That's more effort to try and say that than lights say it. Space sticks.

It's like when boss said to me about some politician, Kirstam. And he said, will he be, making a speech in the House of Politics. And I thought it ought to be called of that, like World of Leather. There should be a shop called the House of Politics. Would it be clearer, wouldn't it, if Parliament was called the House of Politics.

That's what it is. That makes sense. It's so true. You should say... And it's all confusing. House of Commons. Well, there's barely any common as there. Oh, man.

But if you use the phrase space stick to watch the blow to go out and that stall, you'd probably cut me in half with me. Sounds like a drug you If you've got any of them, space sticks. Yeah, come on, baby. Mama's hurting real bad. Give me some space sticks.

But it was tremendous, I must say, except on the way back. I don't mind not being recognised, and I don't mind being recognised. Either of those is fine. Well, I think we know which one you prefer. Yeah, I prefer being recognised. But those days are fading fast.

But it's the people who say, what's your name again? Oh, no, that's so embarrassing. Don't make me. Don't make me identify myself. Like I've been stopped like 3 o'clock in the morning by the Nazis. How do you deal with that? Because it's, if you say...

And also, if you say, I always sympathise with celebrities when that happens. Because if you say, well, I'm Frank Skinner. Like, oh, yeah, well, I ran into Frank Skinner. He couldn't wait to tell me who he was. Yeah, also, I'm on a train. And if I say I'm Frank Skin, everyone looks around. You're all right. How do you deal with that?

Well, normally, I've tried the old, well, you know, I'd have a guess. You'll get it. And then they think, oh, you are, so I'll just tell me who you are. I'm Ben questions. Yeah, exactly. Why don't you just say? No, what's it? What was it, Ben?

Ben continues. Ben continues. Yeah, just say, I'm Ben continues. Yeah, I'll just try that. Anyway, so this guy, he was with his kid and stuff, but there's loads of people all coming about from Comic on his pack. Did he say, I know you don't know, what's your name? He said, oh, yeah, I know, you're famous, aren't you?

People are looking around and thinking, oh, and I said, what's your name? What's your name again? Obi-1. But this is how the exchange went. So I said Frank Skinner. And he went, oh, yeah, Frank Skinner. 90s, yeah? Oh, no, that's so, Mary.

Oh, my God, that's awful. And I said, yeah. I thought I don't want to go any further. Yeah, I died in 1999. Fucking 19. Yeah. On the plus side. I've got been hit with a space.

On the plus side. Yeah. Lovely little thing for your epitaph. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Thanks, Skinner. 90s, yeah? 90s, comma, yeah, question mark.

God. Anyway, look, I should tell you before we go, those of you are still interested in this 2025. 35 years out of date. It's free. Frank off the radio, Frank off the radio, Frank off the radio, it's the Frankskinner podcast, don't you know?

Thanks for listening to the podcast. Make sure to like and follow so you never miss an episode. And if you want to get in touch, you can email the podcast via Frank off the radio at Avalonuk.com.