The Frank Skinner Show - To-Do Lists

Episode Date: October 9, 2026

Frank and Em are in the studio with Katie Norris. Frank’s been reading The New Yorker and is suddenly intrigued by to-do lists. Em’s got thoughts on Boomer Phones, and Katie might get you making a vision board. If you want to message the show, email us at [e-mail] or WhatsApp us on 07457 417 769 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's Frank off the radio. It's the Frankskinner podcast, don't you know? They say for every boy and girl, there's just one love in this whole world. And I, I know, I, I found mine. Congratulations, well done. This is Frank Off the Radio. I'm joined by Emily Dean. Katie Norris is with us today.

Yes. Follow the podcast on X and Instagram. You can email the podcast via. Frank off the radio at Avalonukuk.com In the WhatsApp department WhatsApp On 07457-4-7-4-169 I pressed the wrong jingle

But I turned it into a WhatsApp jingle What about just on the spot I did wonder Yeah a lot of people would have thought Oh God I've pressed the wrong jingle What shall I do but not Frank I loved it Improvised

We just got to a bit of is it the third man? Yeah, it was from the third man. It's the Harry Lyme theme is what it's called, named after the famous bicycles. Right. It's absolutely not, but I wish they were. No, wouldn't it be great if Lyme bikes went as you drove them? Wouldn't it met London?

I don't know if they're making a happier place. Like Penny Farthings, maybe. I couldn't agree more. I would absolutely. Just parked it. Just parked it. And thrown it outside your house. But the Harry Lyme theme on lime bikes. I mean, that reference would be lost on 99% of lime riders.

But I think the music... I would say most of the references I make are lost on 99% of lime riders. Okay. I mean, I can't really ride a bike, so it's lost on me. I can't either. And nor can Frank, really. No, I'm rubbish on a bike. Oh, none of us can really ride a bike.

I mean, can go in a straight line, but if there's any corner, even... You fall off. No, I get off and I push it around and then I get back on it again. What I can't do, you know, you do a hand signal to say you're going to turn, the whole bike just cut. Oh, you just fall off. One hand on the handle bath. That's out of the question.

Yeah. My mum thought bikes were dirty, so we didn't really get on them. And plus, I had an audition that day for, I think it was a TV show, so my mum said we had to prioritise that. So what day? So you couldn't get on the bike because... It was my cycling proficiency test. Oh, I see now.

Well, you didn't give us any context. I didn't. And I loved it. I loved losing you. Yeah, it was like an avant-garde. Da-da-da-da-da. Yeah. You'll say that in three months, the new mayor of London,

I don't know when the election is. The new mayor of London will introduce that and everyone getting the credit for it. Yeah. Story of my life. Okay. I was in church on Sunday. Lovely.

And why? Shuck by that news for some reason. No, I go every Sunday. Right. He's really religious. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah, anyway.

You don't just work there. The, a phone went off. And you know when a phone goes off and you think, all right, answer it. And it's just, it just keeps going off. And no one was doing anything. I was looking around thinking, guys, don't just let it ring and ring. Eventually, the priest said, oh, look, I'm sorry about this.

Pulled his robes up and took a phone out of his pocket. That's a good gag, that is. But he then texted a reply. What? Mass. Wow. Middle mass. Yeah.

Do you remember her? Jane. Yes. Middle Mas. With the Y. Yeah. And yeah. And we had to wait

why he texted. And of course he texted with the index finger, not the thog. Like this? Yeah, they don't do thumb in the seminary. It's not pretty godly.

Not for the phones. Was he of an age where he would have had what I call a wallet phone? Oh no. Please don't even mention those. Oh, what one that you fold up and fold down?

Are there? actually called boomer phones. Right. You know, those Wallach phones. I have thought that I will not go boomer phone. I mean, they've got your bus pass in it and a credit card. I used to have one of those. Yeah, a picture of your niece.

It's great if you get robbed though. Yeah, but you're young and hot, so you're allowed to have a boomer phone. It's ironic, but you can't be our age and have a boomer phone. Oh, I think it's really embarrassing. It's like an attach case. My mother-in-law comes out and she has a terrible boomer phone. Well, she's inclined to, I don't want to use the word hoard, but hoard. And her boomer phone, none of the many, many pockets are uninhabited.

There's something in there, boss tickets. I've even got pressed flowers in my boomer phone that I've found in parks. That's lovely. I haven't pressed a flower for years. What were you saying before that? I can't remember now. I do apologise. I think it was, so far it's been line bikes and my priest. Oh, your priest, that was it, yes.

Did he say who he was texting and what he was texting about? He didn't say that. Is he a young priest? Yeah, but that's why he didn't. I'd say, he's young if you're me and old if you're you. So he's me. Yeah, there you go. It was actually Emily.

That's what shot me. I mean, when she first walked out, I was shot. When the phone went, I thought, where is this going? As soon as you saw the satin fabric. You should have known. What ropes does he have? Do they have in... That day, I think he was in green.

It depends on... Green? It depends on the feast day. I didn't know they wore green. Oh yeah, there's various ones. Really? Purple, red. I don't think I've ever been to Mass.

It's not popular. Mother-in-law goes. Really? Yeah, but every Sunday. But it's... Her priest is really miserable, apparently. Really? I've had some more tricky ones.

over the years. They can be, can't they? And then there's a Protestant priest that's tried to get me to join in my boyfriend's village. She comes over, but I think she's drunk. Oh. Well, I...

She came here. A business card. Really? Yeah, she came over and was like, Oh, you're new to the village. And then it wasn't until after five minutes, my boyfriend was like, that's the priest. Right.

I thought it was like... We don't have that in the Catholic Church. No, no. No. But More discreet Yeah, exactly We don't have women

priests It's as simple as that Oh dear They would not be on their phone I don't know Who wouldn't? The women Priests in the Catholic Church

They wouldn't text And No I wonder who we did text I mean Was it just how urgent was it I don't know I mean

There's an argument He should have told us Who he was It was God Yeah Yeah It could have been Yeah

I wonder what size Font You'd send back to God. I suppose he's all seeing and all knowing. You didn't send anything back at all. Just send it blank. Can he go? Fair enough. Just an emoji. I'd probably go Gothic to be safe.

I'd avoid comic sands like the play. Can you get what we used to score, call at school Robin Hood writing? Yes. Can you get that on a phone phone? Absolutely. I don't know what's Robin Hood writing. I don't know. You know, that sort of Gothic. Oh yeah.

Robin Hood is. Medieval. We would have called it Olden Day. medieval writing. I don't know what happened to the old and days. You never hear that mention any. Because people despise the past so much, they don't say it with any sort of war. You're right, people have real contempt for the past. Often than reform, but young people like, they don't like the past.

I think they like the distant past because they love the history podcast, the young people. They're really into, I think they're really into the medieval kind of. They like medieval, but they don't like more recent history. They don't like to be reminded. But when you say like George Harrison and they say I've heard. Well, they all dress like George Harrison in Hackney now. If you go. But they don't know. Yeah, you're right.

They'll say quite proudly sometimes. I don't even know who that is. You see, in Ulbury, where I come from, the dress is still medieval. So it's all, it depends where you just put the pin in the historical timeline. So listen, I'll ask you a question. I was reading the New Yorker magazine. Yes. You know why?

What about this? I have an American lady lives next door. She subscribes to the New Yorker. And when she's finished, she puts them through my door. That's so lovely. It's quite expensive, isn't it, to subscribe to the New York? Very planet-friendly as well. I've never tried it.

And it's lovely because, you know, the crossword's done and that. I don't feel I'm going in somewhere new. It feels, it's like putting on... You know, when you get second-hand shoes from a charity shop? It's that kind of feel. Someone else has done the hard work. No, I don't. When you're reading the crossword.

I've ever done that in my life. What second I don't know what it's like. That's great. I give my shoes to the church up all the time. Yeah, because you know when you've, maybe you don't feel this. But when I first wear shoes and they are perfect, I think I can't wait for this to get scoffed. Oh, do you, Frank? That's rather lovely of you.

Whereas I can let someone else do my scuffing. You don't have red bottoms on your shoes. I don't. I've got one on my chimpanzee. That's any good, too. So sorry, Katie. So listen, I was reading an article. And I don't know, I don't often come here and tell you about articles I've been reading by a woman called Patricia Marks. And it was all about to-do lists.

And I realized, I don't know if I've ever done one. I need a to-do list that says to-do list on it so I can do. one. I don't mean do one as he go. As in Danny Dyer. No. Do one. It's one of the most shocking things you've ever said. Because Katie, I'm going to go to you first. I mean, are you a to-do list person? Well, yeah. And I've got like three or four to-do lists in this book with my notebook, even just today.

You've got one for today? Yeah. It said, turn up and don't be late to Frank's podcast. Ignore when he makes a joke about chimpans, ease off. And then... I don't believe that's on your to-do list. No. But yeah, I've got... I've been doing to-do-s.

And what I do is I sometimes... Could you read a genuine article that won't drop you... A genuine to-do list? A genuine item. Sort out taxidermy crow. Because I've got a taxidermy crow. Oh, you've seen your taxidermy crow. Polish white boots.

Send invoice, reply to Ethan. I don't know if... Ethan, if you're listening, I don't know if I did it or not. I didn't tick it off. But this is a great to-do list. Sort out, what was it? Taxidemi Crow. Taxidermy Crow.

I mean, I needed to stick more feathers on it because it had looked to them. One of the one this woman said was a fine example was in the Smithsonian magazine, there was a to do list that was five volcanoes to watch. I was. volcanoes that could go at any moment. Well, no, I think it's a thing that you need to get your eye on. The woman, what about this? Before we get back to yours,

she was talking about her own, so she did what you were doing there. And she said, I swear to you, this is genuine things. She said, I've got one that's been on every to-do list for months. And it's memorized map of the world, one continent at the time. Oh, that's good This woman has nothing to do I just think she thinks

that would be a great thing to have at your fingertips It's a sense of achievement Me and my best friend Jane I think we might have told you about this at the time Jane with a Y? Jane, you know she's not within a YJ. No, I know, but I just understand. We decided to learn the whole periodic table

with my heart together and I still can remember quite a significant part of it How do you synchronised? Oh, please, Frank. We used, I can never say this word. But what can you do with the periodic table? Well, nothing, but we enjoyed, I think, what it was.

Pub quizzes, I guess. Something that men like, you know, it's like, it was an opportunity to get together and socialise, but to have a goal and a task. I think that's more why we did it. Yeah, and also a bit of fun. Yeah. Not forgetting the fun.

A bit of fun. Hydrogen, helium, berym. But never, never, I can see that it is. a practical thing to have to know in every country. If you just memorize one of, my son this week hit 1,000 days on his dual language. Wow, what's he learning? What language?

Finnish. Incredible. He learns Finnish. One thousand days. And he put up a post saying, this means a lot to me. It was really quite a moving post about getting the thousand days up.

That's lovely. Oh, Boz of a thousand days, I'm going to call him. But is he speaking, have you heard him speaking fluently to you? Well, when I'll watch him doing Duolingo now, he does it so fast. I thought what he's got to be really getting across finish there. Maybe are you going on a holiday to Finland? Oh, that's a good idea. Yeah, take him on holiday to Finland.

I'd be, he only learned it because Finland's got a big death metal scene. Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. You got our motivations for the general. Anyway, one of the facts from this article is that somebody did a survey. They got people to send in their lists and blah, blah, blah, and say how many of them have done.

And they found out, this is an American statistic, not UK. 41% of items on to-do lists are never done. Is that right? 41%. Oh my God, that's terrifying. It is. Well, that's why I keep it very simple. I never go too ambitious with mine.

What a periodic table. Well, that's true. But that wasn't a to-do list thing, and that was my friend Jane. She aims a bit higher. But I literally, and this is so embarrassing. And if I die, Frank, I'm going to have to get Cass to come and remove this because I'm ashamed. Well, you will die. No, but if I die before you.

Oh, okay. I do a list. I like the word. If you pre-decease me. Yeah, pre-decease me. Oh, that's a good word. So solicitors. It's up there with legal tender, only used by a certain type of person.

I put Wake Up at 645. I start the day before I do it. And I have to, I literally put things like, it's very detailed. But you use an alarm to help you with that one, presumably. Yeah, but I still. You're not so strict on a to-do list. No. You could just put Wakel 65 and you will.

I'm not a medieval priest. lying on the dawn. Sorry to hear that. Well, there can't be more than one of us in this room. No, you're right. And then I get very forensic. I'm like clean teeth, make coffee. Oh, so you kind of do things that are...

Oh, you have things. Yeah. Clean teeth. You put that on your to-do list. Because I feel really satisfied that I've got... And I put times for everything. Do you tick them? Yeah.

And it's so that I have times. Then later... I had no idea I'd open this. Well, no, because sometimes... It's kind of a treasure chest. It gives you encouragement. Because sometimes I put things on my to-do list that I've already done. And then I write it and then...

Ridiculous. But it's like I know that I've already done it. Do you have a done list? Well, it makes me go, thank God I finally did that. Do you like doing this? Oh, I'm ashamed. But I feel I really trust you both. I sometimes write in capital letters done with two exclamation marks.

Oh, dear. And did you put the date as well? Because I sometimes put the date. Oh, do you do that? Yeah, yeah. I have, no, I've been missing out. How have you got as far in life as you have without doing a to-do list? I don't know. What a to do-do? What's they said?

But if you had to, so for example, on mine, I'm seeing one here, visit Superdrug. I love... I thought you were going to say Sue Perkins. No, I love Sue Perkins. What I let down, it became Soapodrog at the end. I like also that I've made it sound like Visit Canterbury Cathedral. Visit Superdrug. Why didn't I just say Superdrug? And so I'll put things I have to actually do.

then I've got... I'm going to start doing them. Do you do them... You do, I can see Katie's from here in a notebook. Mine are all like that. You're online, are they? I'm in my notes app. So then it's got Tell Will to take out my gushing bits.

That is... Is that your gynecologist? Honestly, you cannot be trusted with anything. Doctor Will. To be fair, Dr Will, he should be... I tell you the most innocent things. You make it into Phil. You know what you are?

I'd say it was more anatomy. You're the alchemist of filth. I said that to Will. Alchemistic filth. Ooh. Alchemist of a reference. I'm trying to think of a rhyme, but I'm struggling. No.

Filth is tricky. You're a songwriter, okay. What would you rhyme with filth? I'd just like to finish that. And you're like, there. Over to you.

That is a reference to That must be a podcast interview Where I felt I was gushing In my intro Oh frankly Stop it So you're going to get that cut out It must have been something

When I was talking about I can't remember specifically what it is I will find out But you were being gushy about somebody or something I think it was in my intro or something And I was probably like Oh I've gone a bit over the top here Not during the chat

I don't really edit the chat itself It will have just been the intro Anyway, I will update you on whether he remove my gushing bits. Yeah. Okay? I'm looking forward to hearing. And will you bring them in a small job? Frank, you've taken it too far.

There's also a thing. I just want to share all this and see what you make of it. There's a thing that she talked about, which is from the same sort of school of getting things done, called admin nights. No, I don't. That's too far. Do you know about those?

Like where friends get together to do it. Friends get together. And do things like their receipts and stuff like that. Really? And they have like some cake and coffee and maybe even. So if you had to do. Maybe even a glass of wine. Maybe a glass of wine.

I love it when people say I had a glass of wine. And I think you fucking non-alcoholic piece of shit. In the old days, if I'd have said, oh, I'm going out for a glass of wine. He's never understood glass of wine. No. You're going to wet yourself. a glass of wine. He's a creature of extremes, Katie.

I mean, I went away with my boyfriend's family at the weekend and they love a drink. And I got really drunk on Friday night and I don't remember anything. And I was in the hot tub. And they were like, do you want to come and get some fish and chips? And I was like, I'll have the fish and chips here. And so then I was just, they were just giving me fish and chips. In the hot tub? Well, I was in the hot tub.

Well, they were just eating inside. There's a thing, isn't it, that Jen said, get called hang. anxiety. Hangxiety. Yeah, yeah. Which Enz don't drink. Yeah. Is that instead of hangar then, which we got?

No, but anxiety is a hangover when you can't remember what you did and you're thinking, like, God, did I tell Sue that I love that? Got it. Yeah. At Superdrug. When I was in Superdrug and sort of there. So yeah, at midnight, a bunch of friends get together and do all that stuff, like go through their emails and stuff. Because it's more fun, present.

presumably with other people. Yeah. Would you say you're like your tax return and things like that? Yeah, the most dull things that you put off but because you're with your friends

it's all lovely and fun. I wouldn't get it done, I don't think. What I have done with my friends is vision board nights. Have you? Where you get together and you bring loads of magazines

and you have like doll for dinner maybe. Oh yeah. And maybe a glass of wine. Exactly. Some lady petrol. A bit of Picpool Pinae and then you cut out pictures

and you make your sort of visions for the future. If someone said to me, I'm having doll for dinner, I'd say, you do know he's anti-Semitic. Oh, Frank. You can't do a vision board evening with Frank. He'd have like a load of zygons on there or something. I don't know what a vision board is, really. It's just, um, how do you explain it? It's a way of sort of manifesting your future in pictures and words. It's what you want to manifest. So if you wanted a particular career or if there was a dream cottage you wanted to live in, it's every time you look at it. Oh, it's that thing that Noel Edmonds does. Frank, don't put it down by comparing it to Noel Edmunds. He does.

He does. Apparently, he lists the things he wants in life and then they happen. Yeah. Yeah. And as I said, that doesn't even happen with a carder. Yeah, but he sees orbs as well. He has albs, doesn't he, as well? Oh, yeah. I know I think he always walked like that.

Oh, fine. I'm quite, um, there's a body doubling is another thing where if you have work to do, you have someone else in the room. They didn't even be working, but a friend or a loved one. Yeah. A friend or a loved one said more about my problems with friendship than anything. I think a friend or a loved one. Yeah, not the same.

Yeah. So the idea is if you've got a load to do in your partner, say if you've got an Edinburgh show to write, Katie, and your partner who I've met as a practical man, just sat in the corner, maybe, I don't know, reading an animal, Andy McNabb novel. That would annoy me. Would it?

Yeah, I can't have anyone really in the room with me when I'm trying to write James. Oh, no, have you tried it though? Yes. What about people who write in Starbucks and stuff? They're obviously okay with it. I can't really write in Starbucks either. I write in bed, horizontal.

Do you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how I write my job. Yes. Oh, does you write in bed, more pergo? Yeah, Michael Morpergo writes in bed. Oh, I'll tell you who else does that. Judy Finnegan.

Does she really? What does she write? She's a very successful author. Not to-do list. Is she? Yeah. Not so, obviously she was successful. I mean, it would be mad not to, given the book club is still running.

But that thing about doing drawings, do you know that story about Michelangelo used to write a shopping list for his servant? But none of them could read. So we would draw brilliant carrots and things like that. Oh, I did not know that. Oh, it's funny. They'd kept those. So you have the person with you with the idea of to use a training parlance spotting you during the workout. Like a sort of support worker.

Yeah. It's called body dodling. That's less glamorous than spotting. The theory is, I think, it's a sort of an audience effect. So the idea of if, you know when you're working sometimes on your own and then suddenly you spend 45 minutes playing online, tent pin bowling. It's just to give you a sense of accountability. Yeah, you wouldn't do that if you were... Well, that's interesting, because you know in America, they have accountability coaches.

John Coogan Mellencamp's daughter, Teddy Mellencamp is one. She's a very famous one. Wow. And Teddy Mellencamp is a very famous accountability coach. And you literally... You're basically just like a personal trainer for the mind. Yeah, so... But what she literally does, Teddy Mellon camp, is that you can just say, what do you have to do?

And then she'll ring you. And so you said you were going to sort out your tax this week, Casey. And I would say, fuck off. Not to Teddy Bellingham. That would annoy me. Or Frank, it might say if it was on your to-do list, Frank, you were going to watch seven Doctor Who box sets. You know, she would call you about that.

So that's what I wouldn't mind doing. Instead of the continents, country by country, I wouldn't mind learning off by heart all the Doctor Who episodes in 1963. Learning them off by half the scripts Oh sorry And you said Excuse me From the man who said it was useless

Me learning the periodic table But that wouldn't be useless Because I know I talk to Doctor Who fans And they say Oh I know You know that bit in You know in

Spearhead from Space And I say what Episode 1 Spearhead And then I don't feel good I feel like it'd be good on Celebrity Mastermind Yeah

Which no longer exists No of course That doesn't I still can't believe you would seriously consider doing that. Can I tell you one last fact which I really liked? One woman said she did admin night on Zoom and was one thing that she had to write,

that she had, you know, some people have that child thing when they lie on the floor and work, and she did that and a voice said, and I wrote this down, Susan, staying on screen is part of the social contract. And she had to get back up so they could see her. I love that. But the other one is the thing about working together and going through your stuff,

the woman said that people arrive and there's like a groove between their eyebrows of stress. And at the end of it, when they've done all that admin they didn't want to do because there are other people there. And it's actually been quite enjoyable. She said they leave and that's gone. and she called it, what about this? The Botox of Completion. Oh, that's beautiful.

No more stress. In fact, that's on my to-do list without the completion. The Botox. No, I don't. I've had it before, but I don't have it anymore. I haven't had it for about a year now. I don't have. Sorry, Frank, we've gone off on us. It's all right. You probably guessed that I haven't had it.

But you know, you don't need it. Isn't his forehead amazing? Yeah, incredible. Well, it's a lot of my forehead. No, but it's very smooth. Anyway, we don't, yeah We'll talk about this later Yeah, yeah, yeah

And then if you want to message me as well I know an amazing woman in acting Who does Botoc? Yeah I think you had to get to like a proper hospital thing No, you don't have to go to hospital No You don't go to hospital, Frank for Botox?

It takes five minutes Oh, is it? It's like yoga, those kind of people It's literally just like having a facial or something They just literally put the It depends where you're getting it Well, that's true

But it is a needle in your family It's a needle. The only reason I don't have it, it's not for any moral reasons. It's because I ended up looking like odd blood from carry on screaming. That's why I don't have it. You say that like it's a bad thing. That's your hashtag goals. But yeah, that's why I don't have it.

I have the wrong facial structure for it. Apparently. Is that right? Some people do. You don't need it, I mean, yeah. I mean, I just tried it for a while and then I thought it's a bit too expensive, like to have it done. consistently. It's very expensive.

It disintegrates back into the body after like three months. And it's £300 per area generally. Generally, yeah. And when they... How big an area is that? Well, there you... How dare you mind your own bee first. When they say an area, so the...

Globolo is it? The two... Where you get the groove of stress? They're called the 11s, yeah. The 11s, uh, in the... Just between the eyebrows. If you need to do that, that's going to be 300. Then you've got to do the forehead lines.

Oh, you wouldn't do a whole four-hound. Mine did mine for 300 all over. Oh dear, I've been ripped off. It depends how many viols we're using. She might have gone to a really cheap state. I don't go to Harley Street or anywhere like that. Oh, I do. Oh, I see, that's the difference.

A back street Botoxist. We just do it on the tube. But I don't go. Yeah, I wish I could go, but I will look like odd bod. so, you know. Well, you know, it might have changed since then the technology. Oddboard might be in fashion suddenly. You never know.

Get the look. Yeah, I think Richard E. Grant being high profile at the moment has been good for us. Have you watched celebrity traitors? Have you watched celebrity traitors? Yeah. He was, bless him. I don't know. He said I'm a traitor.

It's a bit heartbreaking. But I think he thought, can we discuss why he did that? Was he trying to, did he? I think he's not watched it. He's not watched the... Yeah, it was a joke. Was it? But why is he never said when they said, why did you say that?

Well, exactly. If he'd have said, look, I was joking guys. I just said the most outrageous thing I could think of. Because interestingly, Jonathan Ross and Alan Carr did similar things when they were in the castle and got away with it. References to being traitorous. But people say stuff like that the other day, all the time, you know. But they're so... How's your husband?

Oh, he's dead. that's a normal sort of response people say that Frank how's your husband did I think it's because he said it in a way that was like I know but that's a joke

I know but that's a weird what's that happened with Richard E. Grant is that actually the husband he's dead as it turns out that's where the joke went wrong oh no I didn't mean his wife I mean he said something that was true right

I think he said it when he answered it like he didn't understand the game Like it wasn't like, I'm a traitor, wink, wink. He said it like, I'm a traitor, obviously. Look, it read wrong. I read it a bit like he was a bit confused or something. Like he hadn't watched the game.

I don't mean that unkindly. It's not an age thing. Do you think it was one not too many in the scarf? Oh, God. He loves a scarf. I can't cope with a posh bloke. I've got a T.S. Eliot poem saying read by Jeremy irons and he's got like a nine knots in his scarf. It's very, I call it the Art Malick look

because he loves a scarf, a knotted scarf, do you know what I mean? And Trilby. Yeah, I feel sorry for Richard E. Grant. I mean, you know. I mean, hopefully he won't go. He's doomed. Is he? You've got to vote for him, haven't you?

If he says I'm a traitor. I know, I think he's gone. Because if you don't vote for him and he is a traitor, you look a complete idiot. Yeah. I thought Joe, Like I said sort of going, oh, oh, I don't think you're supposed to say that. If he did go on, it would have been no problem.

Oh, Joe Leicitt kicked on it. Joe Leicitt cased on it and then everyone else did. Which he was right to do, to be honest. I know, but, you know, that's what happens. People bully the elderly. What about Ross Kemp? He's getting on all right. Oh, Ross Kemp is hilarious.

It is like that. Ross Kemp can't handle just a woman giving him any attention. What's she doing? What? That's like me with everyone I've ever dated. Why are you touching me, getting me a drink and being nice to me? You've just killed me, hang you. That's literally how I behave on date.

I'd like to see Ross Kemp peering out of an enormous tortoise shell. Oh, don't. It'll be perfect. Oh, for Kemp, though. But he was so paranoid. When that girl put the hat on him. young woman. I can't put that hat on him.

That's all she did. But when he was a bit cut when she was cold. Yeah, just said. He was like, have you just killed me? The woman with her wily ways. Yeah.

Yeah, it does seem to have a bit of a problem. With young women giving him any attention. But there were two people on the show who were involved with people who were very, very high up in the hacking case. Jerry. Because Jerry was with Rupert Murdoch And Ross Kemp was with Rebecca

I hadn't even thought of that Yeah Rebecca Brooks Yeah Oh my God I'd never thought of that You're absolutely right But it's not a conversation that would crop up on Triters It's more of a big brother conversation

So do you think they're the secret couple Well I think they're probably Are not appalled at the idea of lies No no no And probably quite suspicious Yeah Yeah Although Jerry Hall's gone

isn't she? Really. She'll get murdered, won't she? Why? Well, it was between her and Hannah Frye. Oh, yeah. To be murdered. Does one of them have to go?

Yeah. Yeah, because all the other's got immunity. Poor old Hannah Fry. Just trying to help an old lady. Try to help an old lady. You know, kind enough to get in a coffee with an old lady. And then had to leave the coffin. Yeah.

I've always said done getting a coffee with an old lady. It sounds sexy, but it soon wears off. A lot of people have given me that feedback. I'm sorry, I just... That's like me, midway through Edinburgh. Hagas! She got to be Texan when you do it. Oh yeah, so last night I was tour guiding

because I do talk, you know. Oh, do you? I do that. Yeah, I've been doing a lot of that. Back from Edinburgh last. Were you SOO? I was SOHO last night. So last night I did a private,

so they'd sort of booked me just for a few hours. So I take Americans around the city. In a funny girl outfit. In a funny girl outfit. In a huge Pashmina. I've heard that. Oh, Frank. Please, you've dragged down everything all the time.

Sorry. How many did you have? I guess. I had six. But it was like they were from New York and they were like, I was in the Sopranos. You know, I literally was transported in Sopranos all night. We were eating around every restaurant we went to. in Soho, they were like, Katie, come on, eat with us.

Eat with us, sweetheart, eat with us, like this. Were they throwing around the, you know, the money a bit? I got a huge water cash at the end. Wow. 75 pounds, to be exact, but you know, that's my shopping, isn't it? I can eat this week. You know what you can eat this week, don't you?

Go on. Haggis! I don't understand the Haggis. You do. Is it from Big Brother? I've been celebrity traitors. Who said it again? You know, they're in the coffin and they have to shout Hagus.

Oh, yes. It's their version. Your last few minutes must have been really difficult. I thought what? Are they okay? You thought they were just really hungry? I thought why did they keep... I thought it was some weird thing going on between you two.

I know exactly what you mean now. It's because it's quicker to say than I'm a celebrity getting out of here or the equivalent. There was a minute when I thought, I'll let them do them. They're enjoying this. And it's okay. Yeah, yeah. So did you like the American? I love them.

And I took them to the pub and they were. We go and have a steak and ale pie in the pub. And we were outside and they're really baffled the Americans by why we're standing outside these pubs. They're like, what are they queuing for? And then he went over to this guy and he was like, hey, am I a bloke? Oh, fat.

And then the guy was like, yeah, you were bloke. She's like, what? So you would say to me, you're a bloke. I'm a bloke. He's like, yeah, mate, I would. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like going over to everyone in the street, shaking their hand. Have you seen the Sopranos?

Yeah, like that is Italian kind of. We hate the Sopranos. Well, I don't like the Sopranos either, but you know, you're not. We compared it, well, I did. I said it was like the Dormillo ads, and that's what put me off. Well, that's what last night was like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In fact, you're made a plastic scene or whatever.

No, I like, I don't, I tried the Sopranos and I tried the Wire. Did you not like the Sopranos? That's interesting none of us likes it, because Frank and I are social pariahs for not liking the Sopranos. Some people are really love. I've not given it a chance. They look horrified when we've given it a chance. I haven't even given the, I haven't even watched the wire.

Someone tell me you've got to have subtitles and I've thought, oh, forget about it. Well, I have subtitles on everything now anyway. Even celebrity traders has subtitles. Everything I watch has subtitles. Yeah, I've got, it's quite, it's made me stupid, I think. By the way, I think we have to end. Oh, right. Huggins!

That'll do it. It's the Frank Skinner podcast. A new winter change is blowing It's the Frank Skinner podcast I'm not totally sure how it's going Thanks for listening to the podcast Make sure to like and follow So you never miss an episode

And if you want to get in touch You can email the podcast via Frank off the radio Atavalonuk.com