The Game with Alex Hormozi - What the Wealthy Actually Teach Their Kids | Ep 876
Episode Date: June 18, 2025In this episode, Alex (@AlexHormozi) explores how pretending to be successful often delays actual success, and why focusing on real execution always beats playing the part. He breaks down the differen...ce between signaling versus achieving, emphasizing how chasing the appearance of success can lead entrepreneurs down the wrong path, while consistent action and value creation are what actually move the needle.Welcome to The Game w/Alex Hormozi, hosted by entrepreneur, founder, investor, author, public speaker, and content creator Alex Hormozi. On this podcast, you’ll hear how to get more customers, make more profit per customer, how to keep them longer, and the many failures and lessons Alex has learned and will learn on his path from $100M to $1B in net worth.Wanna scale your business? Click here.Follow Alex Hormozi’s Socials:LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | AcquisitionMentioned in this episode:Get access to the free $100M Scaling Roadmap at www.acquisition.com/roadmap
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And this is going to ruffle some feathers.
You want to prioritize earning over saving.
So one of the biggest mistakes poor people make is they think they can save their way to wealth.
But the truth is, it's better to focus on how to 10x your income than save an additional 10%.
What's going, everyone?
I was thinking about the advantages that rich kids have the poor kids outside of money.
And I actually think that the greatest advantage they have are non-monetary.
It's changing how the kids think and changing their worldviews.
And I think that's the gift of being, quote, born rich.
And I try to break down some of the behaviors that I've observed between rich kids and poor kids
or rich parents teaching rich kids and poor parents teaching poor kids.
And I think you'll enjoy it.
I'm going to show you why being a small business owner is the best tax deal in America.
So let's say that your business nets you $100,000 per year in income.
All right. Now, normally, you'd pay $14,600 in taxes if that's how you filed, right?
So you'd have, call it roughly $85,000 per year post taxes, and you pay somewhere in the neighborhood of around 15%.
Not bad, but the thing is, is that as a small business owner, you can drop this all the way down to six.
So let me show you how.
So with your $100,000, if you're running your business out of it, then you probably have a phone.
You probably have Wi-Fi.
You probably have a car.
You probably have insurance.
You probably have gas.
You even have clothes to a certain degree if you're wearing them in a specific way during meetings that you can prove.
You might use a portion of your house that you use specifically for work that you designate.
All of the costs of all of these things, you can take out of your $100,000.
Now, let's say that all of a sudden we take out, call it $53,000.
I'm doing the math on purpose here, right?
We take this out on top, and so then all we have left to get taxed on, because we expense
this, is $47,000.
Well, on $47,000 of income in the United States, you pay 6%.
And so if you're going to buy this stuff either way, you can expense it through the business,
as long as there's some business purpose, which in all of these cases you would be using
them for business, and you can legally pay significantly lower in taxes.
That is why owning a business in America is still the best tax deal.
If you're watching this video, you probably want to create generational wealth.
And guess what?
Generational wealth is passed through education, not assets.
So let me prove it to you.
It's not like rich kids are born with higher IQs.
We already know that, right?
So it's not genetic.
They don't have bigger brains, but they do have advantages.
So what are those advantages?
It's two big buckets.
It's declarative knowledge and procedure knowledge,
which said differently, is belief,
and skills, which is knowing about stuff versus how to do stuff.
I'm going to do my absolute best to share as many of these in this video as humanly possible,
starting with, number one, don't despise wealth, which the Alex Hermosey translation is,
don't hate money, aka don't hate money or the rich.
One of the easiest ways to stay poor is believe rich people are evil.
And I'll tell you on a personal level, every single self,
made billionaire that I have met, me personally, has honestly been great. And I think a big part of
that is that they were self-made because you have to be, right? You have to be understanding. You have to
be somewhat of a people person. You have to learn how to influence. You have to learn how to promote.
Like, these are all things that you must do. And so we live in this, this veil, right? And the media
pushes this ethos that billionaires are somehow these evil people, but all the ones that I've ever
personally encountered have been honestly amazing. And they've gone out of their way to help.
they've given first. And I would imagine that those behaviors are things that have gotten them
where they are. Real quick, guys, I have a special, special gift for you for being loyal listeners
of the podcast. Layla and I spent probably an entire quarter putting together our scaling
roadmap. It's breaking scaling into 10 stages and across all eight functions of the business.
So you've got marketing, you've got sales, you've got product, you've got customer success,
You've got IT, you've got recruiting, you've got HR, you've got finance.
We show the problems that emerge at every level of scale and how to graduate to the next level.
It's all free and you can get it personalized to you, so it's about 30-ish pages for each of the stages
Once you enter the questions, it will tell you exactly where you're at and what you need to do to grow.
It's about 14 hours of stuff, but it's narrowed down so that you only have to watch the part that's relevant to you, which will probably be about 90 minutes
And so if that's at all interesting, you can go to acquisition.com forward slash roadmap all
R-O-A-D map, road map.
And so, Naval had this great quote, which said,
understand that ethical wealth creation is possible.
If you secretly despise wealth, it will elude you.
Right?
Like, you can't hate rich people and then at the same time want to become one.
Now, I mean, I guess you could, but it'd be kind of weird, right?
And so some poor parents unintentionally teach their kids that money is scarce and that rich people are greedy or bad.
Right.
Now, the flip side is that wealthy parents teach that money is everywhere.
and that creating value deserves some sort of war through exchange.
And that's the fundamentals of capitalism.
It's voluntary exchange.
The key word is voluntary.
Two people choose to interact, choose to make a trade.
And the beautiful thing about capitalism is both people say thank you.
It's one of the only things in human nature where people do things and both people say thank you.
You go to the cash register, you buy the shoes.
The store order says thank you and you say thank you.
Both people have a net positive sum from the exchange.
And that's how overall economies grow.
And so if you want to grow your own personal economy, the idea is how can I create as many of these
positive sum exchanges as possible? And if you do enough of those positive exchanges, like, why would
you not want lots of people to thank you? Well, because if a lot of people thank you, that it means
that you were doing something good that people will exchange money for. And if you do that a lot of
times, you'll have a lot of money. And so how did this somewhere get distorted? Now, a lot of that's media,
and I'll try to make my own version of media so that I can have a very small voice that says something
a little different. But at the end of the day, money is just a tool, right? It allows to do exchange.
It's literally just an intermediary for exchange. And as a result, it will lubricate the number of
exchanges that you make. And so if you're somebody who tends to do bad stuff, when you have more
tools to do bad stuff, you do more bad stuff. If you were a, quote, good person, I don't even
try to define that, but let's just say good person who has a tool, they will be able to do. You
do more good stuff. And so you're probably not going to be able to create generational wealth
if you hate money. Point number one here, right? But most people destroy their wealth, but most people
can't even take a shot because they actually believe in one of the biggest slides that's out there
that I think it might be prolificated more by poor people, but let's just dive into it. So number two
is that passive income equals BS. Now let me
explain. Passive to you means active to someone else. There's always someone who is active.
And so it's less of a binary of active versus passive and it's a continuum. And so it's like,
where do you live on this continuum? Let's say this is all active and this is all passive.
It's very rare that you have things that are purely here. Now, you can absolutely buy a dividend
ETF and like the only thing that's not passive about that is making all the decision and doing all
the research in order to do that and whatever work you did in order to get the money. But beyond that,
Yes, the difference that you get from that would be passive.
The thing is that most people who see rich people assume that they have all this passive money that's coming in.
But all the richest people that I know for sure have passive income, but they've got way more active income.
And so most people are trying to like get rich on passive when they're like make active income cool again.
Like I'll tell you a story.
So I advise like we own an advisory practice as part of acquisition.com, right, which is where it's functionally like
management consulting. We go and we look at a company. We help them grow. That's what we do, right?
It's actually true custom work. It's not like, you know, courses and coach here or anything like
that. It's like we actually had that. It's unfortunate that the internet space just like automatically
assumes that that's what everything is. But like all the guys that I have are X Harvard, XMBAs, X McKinsey,
XBain, like consultants, right, that work with big companies. And that's because we can help companies
grow, right? And so I work with some companies in a very, very, you know, acute format where I'll spend
a day with, call it like 10ish founders and we'll go really deep on some of the strategies in
their business. And they pay for that. And someone might see that and say, Alex, why would you
trade time for money? Well, think about it like this. If I'm going to work no matter what. So let's just
say Monday through Friday, I work 12 hours a day. Okay, 60 hour a week. So if I'm going to work
Monday through Friday and I have something else that can make me more money for that time,
why would I not do it? Because then I can turn around and take that active income and then say,
hey, maybe I'm going to take some of that and trade it for some money over here. It's a little bit left.
It's a little bit moving that way. And over time, you just increase the amount that you make per
dollar on the active side, per hour, excuse me. And then you have a percentage that goes on
passive. But the thing is, is that as you become more and more skilled, your active will
proportionally increase. And so don't be afraid of making active money. The TLDR is people will
spend 100 hours trying to make $100 a month passive when they could have just made $10,000
getting paid for their active time. That's a bad trade. And so what everyone seems to forget
is that the people with passive income often had massive income first. Right. It's like going to the
gym. You have to put in the active work in the gym for a very long period of time before eventually
you can have a passive body, meaning like you can just work out once a week and more or less
maintain your physique, right? But it takes a long time to get there. And so everybody trades their
time for money. It's just about how much leverage you get, how much you get per hour in. And so
max out your active earning hours first until you have truly gotten all your passive to the point
where it can pass your current lifestyle. The thing is, and every single person who does make,
I want to say every single person.
The vast majority of people that I've met who've made a tremendous amount of money
usually have a period of time where they do the cocktails on the beach,
and then they come back and they say, yeah, that wasn't for me.
To a person.
Like, I'm talking like, I can't even think of one off the top of my head that hasn't said that.
And so it's just this myth.
And the thing is, is the myth keeps you poor because you make those trades.
You spend a thousand hours working so you can make $1,000 a month,
rather than taking the $1,000 and $1,000 hours,
and continuing to up-level your skills,
so you can trade those hours for higher dollars.
So I'll give you a business example for you.
And this is going to be a little bit more advanced,
but bear with me.
So let's say that you've got the opportunity
to have a $10 per month customer, okay?
And that person's going to stay for 60 months, okay?
Now, people would see this and say $10 a month,
that means it's super low churn,
this would be a very valuable business, blah, blah, blah, blah.
If you could get that same customer to pay $1,000
up front for a lifetime deal, should you do it? Yes. Yes, $1,000 is worth more than $600.
But the thing is that people obsess about this and forget about this. And they do this in their
businesses and they do this with their time. And so once you focused on active income,
you need to understand something that separates wealthy from everyone else who stays stuck.
Number three, it's your fault. Somebody's played. These three words will get you out of poverty.
It's my fault.
So one of the best ways to stay poor is blame everyone else for your problems.
And I want to be clear, it might not be your fault, but it still is your problem.
And so maybe I should better say this to less trigger people, but it's your problem.
And so no one else is going to solve it for you, right?
Your trauma is real.
Your problems are valid.
And absolutely no one is coming to save you.
And once you accept that, become dangerous.
It actually doesn't matter if it's your fault.
Nice.
I didn't even say that.
That was the next line.
I'll just keep going with it. It actually doesn't matter if it's your fault, but it is your problem.
You have to solve it because no one else will, and that allows you to actually do something about it, right?
My dad came to this country with $1,000 to his name, but he bought me a lot of lessons, including accountability.
So if my father had been a hedge fund manager, managing $20 billion, I would have a very different life.
Like, I knew what Baltimore rich was, right? My dad's a doctor, right? But then I eventually saw what Vanderbilt and New York money was, like New York fine.
finance money, New York real estate money. I was like, holy cow, right? And so I was rubbing shoulders
with some of the worlds where all these people when I went there. And it like completely shifted my
worldview of like, honestly, just what is possible. Beliefs, declarative knowledge, knowing about something.
I didn't know this was possible. I didn't know about this stuff. Investment baking, I had never heard
of it. M&A, mergers and acquisitions, private equity. I didn't heard of any of this stuff.
Literally the highest income vehicle I had heard of at the time was just become a doctor.
and doctors make good money.
I like, I genuinely, like my goal was $100,000 a year.
So I say this so that you guys, like don't think like I somehow like sprang into existence with billion dollar aspirations.
Like I just wanted to make $100,000.
That was the goal for a while.
And the thing is that average parents will blame the economy, the government or the system.
They say, you know, we have these disadvantages.
It's harder for people like us.
They'll say those things.
And more importantly, their kids will believe them.
and then as a result, change their behavior to make it antithetical or unlikely to them actually
getting out. And so their parents hurt their kids to protect their ego. And I'm saying both egos,
they hurt their, they protect their child's ego and they protect their own ego. But if they were
able to say, we're not rich because I don't have the skills and I never learned them, but I want you
to. And I want you to learn about how wealth works. That's declarative knowledge. And then once you
learn about how wealth works, then I want you to learn how to do it. And I will do everything in
my power to put you in those rooms with people who understand it. And so how do you operationalize
this? Going all the way to the bottom, you use what you've got. So once you figure out that it's
your fault, because people wait for perfect conditions to start when in reality, starting is the
perfect condition. And that's when you can start actually making decisions that lead to wealth,
like understanding principle number four.
Solve rich people's problems.
You solve rich people problems because they pay better.
And when you solve rich people problems,
you get to charge rich people prices.
And here's why this matters.
If somebody got $100 in their bank account
and you're asking for 50,
you're asking for 50% of their net worth.
So for them, it's a very important decision.
But that same $50 might be less than 1%
of a rich person's net worth.
So they don't even care.
It would just be the equivalent of trying to sell $1 to that person
with $100 in their bank.
account, right? They probably would barely even notice it, right? And so most parents teach kids to get a job
serving anyone who will hire them. Wealthy parents teach kids to target specifically high value markets
with specific problems that higher skills can help solve. And so focusing on serving viable markets,
not just any market, is what they transfer to their kids. I mean, the easiest way to figure out
where the money's at is to look at who's already rich and see what they're doing. I think it's like,
it's rich on passive income, they get rich on active income, and then it goes passive, and then they talk
about it. But here's where most people go wrong, even when they're solving valuable problems.
They're obsessed with the wrong side of the wealth equation, which is number five. And this is
going to ruffle some feathers. You want to prioritize earning over saving. So one of the biggest
mistakes poor people make is they think they can save their way to wealth. But the truth is,
it's better to focus on how to 10 extra income than save an additional 10%. Because the thing is,
is that at the absolute hypothetical max, all you can do is save 100%.
You could live on nothing.
You could live on the streets and somehow show up to work or whatever it is that you do to make
and save 100% of what you make.
The thing is, if you're making $30,000 a year, it's just like it takes forever, even at 100%.
And so with how little they try to optimize their earning.
Because, like, I'll give you a couple very easy examples.
You can do the exact same job in a different city and make 30 to 40% more.
And work remote.
You can just work remote to a different company and make significantly more money.
And what's crazy to me is that people don't just like consistently apply to jobs that make more money,
even just in the job market.
Like, why wouldn't you?
Like if you're incredibly poor right now, like someone will take a shot on you.
And you know what?
You might just learn something that you can take with you for the rest of your life.
And you also get this crazy thing called experience, which also stays with you.
You gain evidence.
And so this is the simplest example I can give you.
that is just what I'd explain was arbitrage. The other version is just an arbitrage of time.
So let's say that you, instead of saving, let's say you have the option. Let's see, you have $500.
This is actually a real question. Somebody messaged me and said, I have $1,000 in my bank account.
What should I invest in? And they actually said, what stock should I invest in? That was a DM I got.
And it was so interesting because I was like, man, I can't believe he would ask me this question because it's so absurd.
Like, it misses the point. But like, this is why I'm making this video, right?
is that that $1,000 will literally never become anything.
Now, you might be like, man, if I put $1,000 in Bitcoin in 2013,
let me pull you off the ledge for a second.
If you'd put $1,000 into Bitcoin,
and that was the only thing that you put money into,
so if you had done that, you would have $121,000.
Can't retire on that.
I mean, it's, I mean, you can live for a couple of years,
but you're not going to do much with that.
And so the point is that they're trying to hit these meme coins,
They're trying to figure out, you know, like whatever other BS.
The question automatically was wrong because he was optorizing around the wrong vehicle.
You thought he was going to passive income his way or even hit it big.
But the issue is that you can't retroactively look at one decision and say,
what if I'd put all my money in Bitcoin in that year?
I would be so rich right now.
And you wouldn't be for two reasons.
Number one is that if they had gone up and doubled, you would have sold it.
Number two, if you actually had done that, then you would have made another hundred other stupid
decisions, and you have to factor in those decisions too. And so that decision-making calculus
would be one of incredibly high risk. And so it's very likely that you wouldn't have made money
at all because it wouldn't have been $1,000. You would have put $10 into Bitcoin. Because the other
$990, you would have put into 99 other stupid things. And I'm not saying Bitcoin stupid. That's not my point.
The point is that that would have been a higher risk decision at that time.
So what do you do with your $1,000?
You buy skills.
Now, I say that and people are like, well, how do I buy a skill?
Well, one is you can get paid to earn a skill when you get a job and you actually ask them,
hey, I would like to learn these things.
One, will you pay for it?
Two, will you let me learn it from somebody else who already works here?
And guess what?
Most employers say yes.
You know, why?
Because no one does that.
Because everyone's lazy.
Everyone's afraid.
Everyone, they go, I can't ask them if they'll pay for me to learn something.
Why not?
Like, think about this for me.
If you make $60,000 a year and you're like, hey, can I learn this other skill?
And I would say, okay, once you learn this other skill, let's say you want to go to a conference
for two days that teach a specific thing on, on, you know, TikTok shop, whatever, right?
Like, okay, well, what are you going to use it and when you get back?
Well, I think that if I take that, I could probably sell the books on TikTok shop.
I'd be like, okay, I could see why that would make us more than $5,000.
Great deal.
Go for it.
Now, what do I do?
I'm happy to shell out the five grand because it'll make me more back, and you're happy to learn it because it makes you more valuable overall.
Why would you not do that?
Alternatively, you say, hey, Neil, you're really good at M&A.
You know, at Acquisition.com, do you mind if we have lunch?
You're going to eat either way.
I would love to eat with you.
And if you want, I'm happy to tell you about the stuff that I'm good at on the media side.
And maybe Neil says no.
But you know what?
You can ask 20 other people.
That's free learning.
In terms of skills of like, you know what, my job for sucks.
Everyone is stupid.
My boss is an ass.
whatever. Then what do you do with your thousand bucks now? So I just gave you free skills. I just love
this example. I've used it before. It's so good. A friend of mine's daughter, making minimum wage,
wants to save money. He says, hey, why don't you just triple your minimum wage? She says how?
He says, why don't you just go get a phlebotomist certification? It takes a weekend and it's
$500. And then you pass the test. And then after that eight weeks or whatever it is, right?
You can then make three times your earning power. That's going to
save that's going to that's going to pay more dividends than any SMP any Bitcoin any meme anything because
the thing is even if you do hit it big what do you do when you have a hundred thousand dollars after
that you're stuck the thing is is that you become the money faucet when you stack your skills
and so you can start the lowest tier which is like will anyone I know teach me stuff above that
you've got YouTube videos where you can teach yourself right and there's lots of experts we're
very good at teaching things on the internet that will help above that you're like okay well I have a job
maybe I'll learn from somebody who works here.
And I know that these skills are valuable because my boss pays them more than they pay me and I'd love to learn it.
On top of that, you ask your boss, hey, can I go somewhere where I will find out a skill that will make you more money?
And guess what?
I know that skill is valuable because he'll pay more for it.
And then if none of those other things and if you're like, wow, those are four very legitimate paths to learning, duh.
On top of that, then finally you say, you know what?
No one I know in my business outside of my life and I can't find it on the internet or I would need more personalized attention.
Then you take that and you get a tutor.
That's it.
You go to a certification, you get a tutor, you get a teacher.
And you learn.
Like, that's how I learned Facebook ads.
I just paid someone hourly.
I said, teach me.
And then I made way more back.
And the thing is, is that real world skills like running ads, building landing pages,
learning how to write copy, learning how to sell.
These are all skills that are super valuable in the marketplace and available for free online.
So if you're like, I'm making minimum wage.
I'm making $40,000 a year.
I don't know how to escape.
It's like, dude, pick one.
and stick with it. That's it. And then ask people if they need it. And so if you did spend that money
to draw blood, right, you earn way more from a tiny investment. That's why you don't save. Spend more
in the earning. And I'll tell you a little secret. I spent 100% of my money every single month
until I could not spend the money because I was making too much of it on learning more stuff. Real.
So we're talking 20, 30, 40, 50. I just kept plowing it in because I kept getting a better return on that
that anything I could put it into. And so I'll give you this little rule of thumb. The day you
stop investing in education for yourself in skills is the day that you decide you're good enough and you
don't want to grow anymore. So if you're not investing in anything now, then you've already
decided that you don't want to get better than you are. And so my favorite way of saying this is that
instead of investing in the SMP 500, invest in the S&Me 500 because that $1,000 triples your income
versus turning from $1,000 to $1,100 a year later. Whoop to do. Hey guys, first off,
say thank you. There's one person who's been sharing this more than anyone, and that is you.
The only reason this podcast continues to grow is because you guys are sharing it.
And my only ask is that if this has provided value to or you think it would provide value
to somebody else, more importantly, if you could DM it to them, if you could slack it to them,
if you could text them, a screenshot or a link to this podcast is the only way it grows.
And that's what fills the whole inside of my heart for the approval of others so that I can go to
sleep at night.
And that's why I really do this.
Anyways, enjoy the rest of the pot.
Now, once you start earning these skills, what else do our rich parents say?
Reputation over everything.
Trust is earned in drops but lost in buckets.
Never trade reputation for money.
You can only get one of them back.
Poor parents focus on this month's bills.
Rich parents focus on this decade's wealth building skills.
Every deal I've done with someone who says they value relationships and morals above
everything else has done the opposite. So I prefer dealing with people that just say they want to
make money. And ironically, it tends to keep everyone honest. And so your reputation is your most
valuable asset. And I'm willing to leave money on the table on this deal so there are future deals.
And so the moment you prioritize short-term cash over long-term investments you've already lost.
So what you're missing is the value of a story. So let me explain. So I was studying Rockefeller
and he was telling a story to his son about how he made his first really big acquisition.
So Rockefeller was the second biggest oil producer in a city of Ohio camera.
I think it was Cincinnati.
It doesn't matter.
He was number two.
And the number one guy was significantly bigger than him.
And so he approached the number one guy and said, hey, I want to buy you out.
The guy scoffed at him, laughed him off.
And then he came back.
He said, no, I'm serious.
And he was like, all right, fine, let's talk.
And so the guy said, I'm not going to sell unless you're going to give me an absurd.
amount of money. And so then Rockefeller lined up the financing and gave the guy an absurd amount
of money. In other words, he overpaid for the guy's business. And so after the deal was done,
the other guy who was, you know, once the bigger guy, was like, man, you overpaid for that
thing. Like, it wasn't even worth close to that. And the crazy part is, is that when Rockefeller
tells a story, he said, he was right. I overpaid for it. But what he failed to consider was that
in the next 60 days, Rockefeller could say he was the number one biggest oil producer in Ohio.
And as soon as that happened, he did 22 M&A deals in the next 60 days rolling up everyone around him because he became the biggest player.
And so that story, the delta between the value of that company was actually worth versus what he was willing to pay.
That value is what John Rockefeller valued the story at.
He might have even valued it higher than that.
And his return on that delta created the next 22 deals he was able to do.
And I think we can all agree that it seemed to work out pretty well for him.
And so people underestimate the value arbitrage that exists in a story.
And stories also go both ways.
And so if there's a story that's equal opposite of that, where you're like, hey, if I do this, I'll give you an example.
I personally have zero issues ethically with, you know, girls who do only fans or whatever else.
And I'll, you know, I'll take the second to say, like, I believe that people have their own choice.
And as long as they're not hurting other people, they should be permitted to do it.
Is it the career path that I would necessarily choose?
No, I wouldn't. I would try it. I would just try and find it something else, right? But do I have any
issues with that? No, I don't. Now, of course, some people who listen to myself will be like,
oh, that's terrible. And it's amazing. I love that you have your own values. That's great.
You don't need to attack mine. Point is, I've had multiple deals that have come to me that I've been
not even necessarily in that space adjacent to it. Right. And honestly, met the people, amazing people,
sometimes great business people. And I was like, I can't do the deal. I'm really sorry. And
they're like but i thought that you are very like hey you know you're just like very you know everything
everything is what it is we all die whatever and i was like i am i was like the thing is is is that
me even having to give the disclaimers i did is because not everyone that i do business with this
and so that reputation would follow me and so it's just i'm not willing to make the trade
and so reputation goes both ways and the thing is is most reputational stuff is very irreversible
And so it's tough to, it's a, it's a one-way door. And so I would rather maximize as many one-way doors that are permanent and good than permanent and debt. So that leads to, well, okay, Rockefeller bought this story, right? He bought this element of reputation who was able to leverage. What else do rich people buy? They buy time. And time is a very amorphous thing, right? Because it really means like I buy excess capacity so that I can reallocate that capacity to something that is going to get me a higher return.
than this inanimate object.
And so I'll tell you a little micro story of this.
How do you make this tactical?
So when I was single and in my early 20s,
I ate at Chipoli over 500 times in one year.
I didn't know that.
I found out from my accountant.
And he was like, why do I have 500 trads of actions at Chipoli?
I was like, well, he's like, you really got to cut down on this bill.
I was like, why?
He's like, you're spending so much money there.
I was like, why don't buy groceries?
It's like, I don't prep food.
I don't do any of that.
And that amount of time that saves me,
I was like, I can do sales all day.
and one sale is 500 bucks and that takes 30 minutes and so I'm happy to just do that.
The thing is, is like, everybody trades time for money.
Everyone does, whether they like it or not.
Because, and I'll prove it, because we live in time and we get money over that same period of time.
So all money you earn is related to some time that you spent getting it, deciding it,
doing a deal, whatever.
There was some time.
Now, it might not have been denoted in a time of you get done.
this per hour, but you could say it took 100 hours to make this deal, and then I made the deal,
and I made $10 million. It's like, okay, well, you took $10 million, divided by $100, and that's how much
you made. You made $100,000 an hour. Great. And so if there's something else that's worth more
than $100,000 an hour, you should do that instead, right? And so getting out of this mythology
and just looking at, like, it's, and getting out of this black and white thinking, and just thinking,
okay, what are the facts? What are the observables, right? And so let me give you the single best
trade that you only get to make once in your life. It costs $1,500 a month. All right? And
I'm going to break it down for you. Like if you if you replay any part of this video, this will be it.
The best ROI you'll ever get for $1,500 a month is that you use that $1,500 to eliminate all time-consuming human tasks and gain back all the productive hours.
So let me tell you what it adds up to. So let's say that food cost you $50, sorry, food costs you 50 hours per month, which is a lot.
Food costs a lot of time. All right. And to.
get that food completely taken care of for you is about 800 bucks okay what else we got we've got
cleaning the house we've got cleaning clothes now both of these you've got cleaning the house is somewhere
probably around 25ish hours per month you've got cleaning folding clothes which is about 16 and
feel like where are these numbers coming from this is from ze research on the internet's you can look it up
on your own doesn't really matter though you're going to get the point in a second so that you can
replace about $500 a month, you can replace this for probably about $200 a month. And so what does all this
add up to? Well, if you add all the stuff together, you're going to save 96 hours per month for a cost
of $1,500. So rough math here. If you know how to make more than $15 per hour, this trade
makes sense. Now I'm going to do you one better. Even if you don't make $15 an hour, if you take the 96 hours
every month to try and learn how to make more than $15, $15 an hour? You can learn that in the month.
And here's the, here's the, here's the good news and the bad news. The good news is that this 100%
works. The crazy part is that I talk to entrepreneurs who are making a million dollars a year and
they don't even do this sometimes because they feel guilty about it. But they just, again,
they believe, they bind to the mythology, right? And if you can't explain your beliefs,
then they're not your beliefs, they're someone else's. Right. And so you just heard this thing
and someone got poo-poot in front of you when you were a kid for, for feeling fancy by having a maid.
and you say, oh, I'm never going to have a maid when I grow up.
But it's dumb.
It's a bad trade.
It's like you think about your business in one way, your cost and expenses and your income.
And then when you think about your personal life, you're like, oh, I'll mow my own lawn.
It's like, why?
And so you can only, and I told you there's two things.
Who do is bad news?
The bad news is that you can only make this trade once.
Because you can't re-keep, like, if I could keep spending $1,500 and getting $96 hours back, my God.
That would be amazing.
Right.
But it doesn't work that way.
You can only do that trade once, right?
That's because there's plenty of businesses that are set up.
and there's plenty of other people who have fewer skills who are willing to do it for less.
So if something doesn't buy time, strongly consider not buying it.
Stop buying so much stuff because at the end of the day, do you want to look rich or do you want to be rich?
And here's the, here's a little plus one, a 201 advanced wealth for you.
Rich people aren't impressed by stuff, by your Lambo, your Rolex, right?
They're impressed by how rich you'll be in 20 years.
Like if I see a younger guy who's flashing a watch, I just think, how silly?
Like you could have taken that and then like you could have taken that.
And 20 years from now, that would have been something significantly bigger, maybe a building or a business, right?
And so I remember the very first event that I ran for gym launch. And this is when I was a cash millator at this point.
I pulled up and it was in Layla's car. So it was a Prius that we shared a car. A Prius with a cracked windshield and a dent in the side door.
And I pull up and all these people, all these gym owners are there because I'm supposed to have to make more money.
right and i remember and you think they like oh no they're going to think or they're going to say something
oh no they said something so i remember this this this this particular gym owner was walking as a group of
them and they see me some of them keep going one of them stops and then just be lines over to where i am
taking my stuff out of my car and she says i thought you were supposed to be rich it's what she said
i thought you were supposed to be rich i remember it i you know kudos to younger me at the time
uh i said i said don't judge my car i said judge my bank account and
And that worked. She was like, oh, okay, good way to think about it. Then we walked in. It was all good. But I remember that story because people do judge a book by its cover, but she was not very rich. And so she was judging me in that way. And so don't try to get, don't get poor people rich. Right. Because poor people rich will keep you poor. So like look at the zucks and the basis is, right? They dress like regular people. Now, to be fair, they try to brag in other ways with their $300 million yachts. But, you know, relative to $100 billion, it's literally less than, I mean, it's
it's less than 1% of there you go, which is absurd, right? And so I, I mean, I remember for me,
I spent 16 months trying to figure out my Darwin outfit, right? Five pieces that work for the gym,
restaurant, work, or the pool, right? And sometimes I have to negotiate my window restaurants
that Lila wants to eat at because of the dress code. But at the end of the day, for me,
I could travel for weeks with a small backpack, get my entire wardrobe in my bedside table.
And so for me, that's more valuable. Now, I want to be clear, there's some people who like,
you know, nice suits and stuff. And there's nothing wrong with that.
maybe in some season of my life, I'll do that.
But I think the key is that you're doing it for you enough for anyone else.
Quick recap.
So don't despise money if you want to have it.
Don't spend all your time trying to make passive income,
make more the active income that you are currently making.
The things that are preventing you are your fault.
And therefore, they're your problem to solve and no one else will solve them.
When you choose to start solving problem, solve rich people's problems.
By doing this, you can start prioritizing your earnings,
over savings so that you can take the money so you can learn the skills to solve rich people's problems.
When you do that, you start to build a reputation. And you never want to sacrifice their reputation
because that reputation will compound. It actually compounds faster than anything else.
And then once that reputation starts compounding, you want to buy time, not stuff, so it continues to
compound. So what makes you compound all this even faster? Avoid bad environments. Now, what's a bad
environment. I would say a bad environment is any environment that decreases the likely to achieve your goals, right? And so Harvard research found that 99% of your success is tied to your reference group. So this research has been cited all over the place, which is one of the longest long-stitial studies on success is that there's a high correlation between your success and your reference group, aka the five people that you compare yourself to. And so when you get, when you cut bad friends, it's not that you're being antisocial, is that you're raising your standards, right? If you want to change your actions,
the easiest thing to do is change your environment, right?
Average parents teach kids to get along with everyone, right?
Wealthy parents teach kids to ruthlessly create their circle.
Like, I mean, I'll be real.
Like, there are some parents, and this isn't me poo-pooing parents,
but that basically let their kids hang out with anyone.
I mean, I could tell you, that was not, that did not fly in, you know, in my household.
Anybody who was going to hang out with me when I was a kid, I'm not saying,
and obviously now, but like, I didn't know that my parents were helping me in that way
when I was younger, is that they made sure that the people that I was friends with were cool.
And by cool, I mean, like, going somewhere, like not scrubs, right?
If you're ambitious and young and your friends are, you know, parting a lot and I think,
honestly, it's like, I don't even think it's parting a lot.
If you're ambitious and young and you have friends who are less ambitious than you,
don't be friends with them.
And then find people who are more ambitious than you and don't let them be more ambitious than
you.
Because if your friends don't have goals, your goal, your goal.
should be to get new friends. My fastest one strike policy is if I feel like you're anything but stoked
when I win, I don't need you. Like I already have enough people rooting against me, right? It shouldn't,
at the very least, my friends should root for me, right? And so friends root for you to win and to make you
better. Enemies tell you to put your goals on hold and secretly hope for you to lose. Think about how
wildness is. Let's say that the people in your life, like do they increase or decrease the likelihood
you achieve your goals? Now, don't think about intention. Don't think
about the reasoning, just ask yourself, this is a little bit of objectivism. This is how I see
the world, which also makes it, it's far more powerful for predicting what's going to happen. Does this
person increase or decrease the likely to hit my goal? If these answers decrease, when you have two or
three or four of those, you've got three or four people that are decreasing the likely to get your goal,
that adds up. Now, on the flip side, if you had multiple people that increased likely to get your goals,
what do you think happens? You rise up. And so if someone caused themselves a friend but acts like an
enemy, treat them like one. The most dangerous enemies are the ones who call themselves your
friend. And if you define enemies as people who decrease likelihood to change your goals,
a lot of the people you think are your friends are your enemies. And on the other side,
there may be people who actually are your enemies who might be your friends. If you're
competitive with someone and all they do is drive you to do better because they're your friend of me,
they serve real value. Maybe you are better friends with them. Kind of interested. When someone
tells me they have a lot of friends, all I think is they just have low standards.
And so why does reference, so the question is, why does having a reference group full of
ambitious and successful people help you, right?
I'll give you Alex's theory.
So motivation is the equal opposite of deprivation.
So let's say this is the goal and this is you.
Okay.
The greater the gap is between these things, the greater the motivation.
So if I just ate lunch, I am not that motivated to eat because I'm not deprived of food.
If I don't eat for three days, I'll be incredibly motivated to eat because I am deprived of food.
If you haven't slept in two days, you're very deprived of sleep and therefore very motivated to sleep.
Right.
Now, how does that work with successful behaviors?
Well, if you, let's say money, because it's a simple one, right?
Let's say you want to make more money.
If you are the wealthiest person of the people you compare yourself to, your motivation to make more money will be significantly lower.
Now, to be clear, I'm not saying that's a bad thing.
I'm just saying it will be.
Now, if the people you compare yourself to, even if you're around poor people make a lot more money than you, then your deprivation will be significantly higher.
And you would think, though, wait, shouldn't the logic be that all poor people should be more motivated to make money?
No, it's about who they compare themselves to.
And if you are the richest of your poor friends, you might feel like a baller.
And again, nothing wrong with that.
But I only talk about increasing likelihoods, right?
So I'll give you a real world example of this.
So who do you think makes more money?
And I'll tie it.
Married guys or single guys?
So ironically, people are like, I don't want that expense.
I don't have a wife and kids.
Well, married guys make more money on average.
Kind of interesting.
And married men with kids make more than just married guys.
And so the thing is just, why would that be a thing?
They make more money because they need more money, right?
They have more deprivation for money when they have four kids.
Then they have no kids.
Right?
And when you have a wife and four kids, you got to make more money.
that drive is what drives them to make more.
Now again, if they then also, that's an element, if they also compare themselves to people
who made significantly more, they might make even more than that.
And so it's not like, oh, wait, does this, are these contradictory?
It's like, no, they're additive, right?
And so the problem is that most poor people know a lot of other poor people.
And so they're not that poor relative to the people they know.
Yeah.
So the deprivation to the reference group is basically no.
It's zero.
And so too is their motivation.
And so most people are so busy looking for outside investments, they completely miss the most obvious opportunity staring them in the face, which is understanding what actually makes them money.
So number nine.
So middle class families teach their kids that their home and car are assets.
So the only money rules that matter to me are number one, spend less than you earned.
I say this is duh, and yet so people will do it.
B, buy stuff that goes like this in value.
if you spend less than you earn, you'll have some leftover. With the leftover, you buy stuff
that will be worth more tomorrow. But that stuff that will be worth more tomorrow might be a skill.
And the thing is because the skill, like, if you thought of a skill as an extra $1,000 a month,
then wouldn't, like, what investments can you pay $500 for one time that make you an extra $1,000
a month for the rest of your life? That would be an insane investment. And that's what skills are.
And here's what's even crazier. They're not taxable. You also can't lose them in a divorce. No government
can take it from you. And it might be because my family fled from Iran during the revolution.
And so we lost everything. The only thing we had was education. But that's why I'm so hard of this
stuff. And then eventually when this stuff makes you more than you need to live, you're good.
Everything else is just bonus. And so it sounds obvious. But like the thing is is that simple things
can be simple to understand, but difficult to execute. Because that's what the heart is with the
stuff. It's not in the understanding. It's going to do it. I actually wrote this. People feel
not because there's some magical list nobody has. They fail because it's an obvious list nobody does.
So number 10 is rich parents have a higher minimum standard. So what does that mean? So there's a
couple ways to think about this. So number one is that like rich parents will talk in different orders
of magnitude, in different increments. And so like this is the classic example of like Warren Buffett
when asked you to do a mic check. It was like one million, two million, three million. And it's just
Like, and I know it was this joke at the time, but I just, I thought about that because like when I was a younger kid, I used to count my money in how many Tripoli burritos I could buy.
And then as I got older, it turned into a larger increment, which for me was actually the number of customers I had to sell in order to make something.
And then over time, basically it's just number of, number of units of something that I've had to sell in order to get whatever I want.
It's just the unit of thing has just stayed stagnant and the cost of those things have gone up.
And so rich parents simply won't allow their kids to go below or accept opportunities that are below the minimum.
So I'll give you a different example.
So there's a guy that I know who grew up rich.
All right.
Super rich.
New York rich.
And he has somehow been able to make, call it, $400,000, $500,000 a year for the vast majority of his adult life with basically no skills.
Like he does nothing.
Like I'm very confident.
Like he actually does nothing.
And what's interesting, though, is that like he's had to go from thing to thing because
eventually people figure that out.
But he will stand there in a negotiation and they're like, hey, you know, we'll pay you
$385,000.
He's like, I'm not working here for less than $450.
And the crazy thing is because he just genuinely like, like delusional just like he would
rather be broke than be someone who makes less than that.
And so like I think that is kind of the declarative knowledge, those standards that are passed down.
Like that is probably some of the biggest gifts. It's like, of course you're not going to do that. It's not worth your time. And so they, they simply wait for better opportunities. That's really it. Like, they just won't say yes to something that's not as good and they'll just wait. And so like, think about it. Think about it in a guys and girls scenario. Like there are tons of poor guys who have like hot girls. And there's tons of ugly dudes who have hot girls who aren't rich.
There are. They exist. Believe. They exist. What separates them from the other guy who's equally
bad looking who doesn't have the hot girl? The other guy just went on more dates or waited longer.
You just kiss more toads, whatever you want to say, right? Eventually, there's going to be some crazy,
hot enough girl that's just like, you know what? He's my kind of ugly. And it works. And that's
the thing that I think a lot of poor parents don't transfer their kids is like there's significantly a higher amount of
volume and because they know it's possible and rich kids aren't smarter than poor kids.
You might be more educated, but not smarter. And so if them, why not you? And so another big
difference between these. So this is number 11. I forgot to write down number 10, but we'll just
we'll say number 10, min standards. Actually, I'm going to add one more thing to that.
So one more on on minimum standards is that the measuring stick they use to measure is,
is bigger, right? They're measuring increments like, list.
to the examples that people are talking about that they claim are a lot around you.
So if the people, if you meet somebody and they're like, it was like $1,000, right?
Like that $1,000 might, that's like them demonstrating that this is an increment that is
meaningful to me.
Like, you want to hang out somebody who's, like, you always want to hang out with the person
who has the largest increment that they measure things with, the largest measuring stick.
And I'll give you a finance example from hedge funds in New York.
They have a slang term for a million dollars, which is a stick.
And so it's like two sticks, four sticks.
Because it's such a common increment of money.
Hard to fathom when you didn't grow up around that.
So number 11, there's four types of money, or rather four sources they can use for leverage.
All right.
And this is super important.
So you get poor a lot of times based on the type of money you use.
So on the kind of like a little A over here is you can use debt.
Right? You can use consumer debt. You can use a credit card, loan shark, whatever, to buy stuff.
You don't want to do that because not only does it cost you today, it costs you more tomorrow.
The next is that you can use your savings. So this is your little nest egg, right?
That's another place that you can finance whatever purchases you want out of.
The third little bucket that we have is you can learn it out of your cash flow.
So you make a check, you get paid on Friday, you take some of that check before it goes into savings and you spend it.
Okay, simple enough. And then the last is what I like to call new opportunities.
And the easiest way to explain this is I had a construction, a kitchen remodeler who didn't,
who came out here, they were probably doing like five-ish million a year or something like that.
And she wanted us to look at the business and have my team kind of like do a full analysis and be like,
all right, this we need to change a market, this, we need to change sales, whatever, right?
And so it's not cheap.
And she took on a project for an extra 150 grand.
that was like a personal design project that she doesn't normally take on so that she could buy it
and pay for it. And I remember thinking to myself like, she's going to make it. Like she'll be fine
because she already thinks about money the right way. And this is a common trait I've seen
among wealthy people. And if you're not wealthy yet and you can adopt this mentality,
then it increases the likelihood that you will make more later. So in reverse here,
if you pay out of this, you're taken from the present. Here you're taking from your past self. Here
you're taking from your future self. Here is the only place where you can take all of your existing flows.
They can continue to get allocated to your investment goals, your savings goals, whatever it is.
But then this money allows you to take advantage of a new opportunity. So you're like, okay, I want to do this thing.
It wasn't in my plan. And so therefore, I'm going to do something that also wasn't in my plan to get it.
That's the magic. And I love this because this is how,
That's how I'm biased here.
It's how I think about money.
And so I, there's a great, there's a great story of Paul McCartney, who was like, he,
he was with, was a Yoko Ono or whatever.
And he wanted a swimming pool.
And she was like, no, or she, whatever, for whatever reason, he couldn't get it.
And so he said, fine.
He said, I'll just go write a song.
And so she said, you're going to write yourself a swimming pool.
And he said, yeah.
And so write yourself your own swimming pool is he needed to go write a song.
He knew if he wrote the song, he'd make the money for the swimming pool.
He could have it.
Of course she could afford it. He was a beetle. He was crushing it. But it's the concept. And the thing is that's the thing is it's like, even when you have the money, it's like, why I've already allocated all this money? And this is something that did it didn't expect. So it's totally okay to also do work you didn't expect to get it. Number 12. And this one, you're not going to, this one will probably surprise it with you. So this is this is SaaS. Spending is a skill. So the only people we say you can't buy happiness haven't given enough away.
And the reason is, is that spending money, using money, is a skill.
And so it makes sense that as you increase your income, and I think the numbers have
been updated, it used to be $70,000.
Now it's closer to like, you know, $400,000 or $500,000 is the cap on happiness.
But that's usually because at $400,000 or $500,000, that is what most people can fathom
with their existing understanding of the world for ways to use money.
And rather than saying spending money, using money.
And so you want to use money because it's a tool like a pro.
And people don't even think about it like that.
Of course you can, like of course there's investments.
But how can you spend effectively, right?
This is where you're constantly buying time, not stuff.
And the thing is that there are levels to buy.
This is call it my 101.
This is my, this is my, you get up to, you know, a couple hundred thousand dollars a year.
This level is spending.
But most people stop there.
You can keep going on this skate, right?
You can get a house manager.
You can have executive assistants.
You get a multiple excessive assistance.
You can have drivers.
You can have security that also help and do things for you.
You can retire your parents.
You can control your calendar even more aggressively.
Like, you can fly private.
Like, there are plenty of other things that you can spend money on to ameliorate,
a little vocab word for you, improve your life.
And so I remember, I'll tell you the story.
So Layla and I, when we were, you know,
coming up, I think at this point, we're probably making, it doesn't matter. We're making a lot of it.
Absolutely with them. And we met with a friend of ours who's significantly older. And, you know,
she's like, why do you always look like crap? And she was being a little bit mean, but she was saying
that to Layla because she was like, you're always just dressed in gym clothes. Right. Now, both of us
came from fitness to like, that's all we owned was fitness clothes, right? And she said,
want you buy nice stuff? And, and Layla was like, I just, you know, I just feel weird.
She's not having that much money on clothes. She's like, you have so much money. What are you talking about?
And so she said, I'm going to take you shopping.
She said, she said, you suck at being rich.
That was actually what she said.
And so she took Layla shopping.
And so I remember Layla told me the store.
She walked into the store and she's like, okay, she's like, meet me at the, at like,
Neiman Marcus or Chanel or something, whatever.
And so she gets into Chanel and then she was like, come to the back.
And they were like, she was like, okay.
So she goes to the back.
And they had an entire room all along, the whole sides of all the room.
they had already pre-picked all the clothes to be only Layla's size.
And they had like champagne.
And she was sitting there.
Her friend was like, all right, you're not leaving here without spending at least $30,000.
And so Layla spent, and like, Layla's like, stomach dropped.
She's like, oh, my God.
And so she spent $36,000 on clothing.
Now, of course, my stomach dropped was like, what happened?
But anyways, she spent the money.
And the point was, is that this friend of ours,
had been rich for a very long time.
And she was like, you said you wanted these things.
So she's like, so get them.
You know, it's just like, and again, you might be like, wait a second.
I thought this is, this is anesthetical to that.
Layla likes that stuff.
She would, she wears it.
She likes this stuff.
I obviously don't.
And I think that that's like if you, if you take anything from this, it's doing you.
Right.
I think you acquire this money to do what?
You're going to die with it and then leave it to somebody else who's going to blow it.
So who cares, right?
Like, I talk about this from the perspective of how do I optimize to get this outcome?
Once you get the outcome, you can do whatever you want.
But if you only optimize around money, you optimize around accumulation of a tool.
So you might as well also have this skill to use it.
