The Gargle - Farts | Laughter | Potatoes

Episode Date: January 7, 2022

Anuvab Pal and James Colley join host Alice Fraser for episode 43 of The Gargle, the weekly topical comedy podcast from The Bugle - with no politics!💨 Farts in a jar😂 Laughter the best medicine���� French burn fewer cars🥔 Tates on a plane🎼 Crypto the new music? 🐿 Squirrel rampageProduced by Ped Hunter and Chris Skinner Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi, it's producer Chris from The Bugle here. Did you know that I have a new series of my podcast, Richie Firth Travel Hacker, out now? It's the show where Richie Firth and I talk about how to make travel better in our very special way. In this series, we discuss line bikes, Teslas, the London overground, and a whole bunch of other random stuff that possibly involves wheels

or tracks or engines of some variety. God, what a hot sell this is. I mean, you must be so excited. Listen now. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Every sport has their big, juicy controversy. Boxing has the Mike Tyson ear bite.

Cycling has Lance Armstrong. Baseball has its steroid era. Curling has... Broomgate. It's a story of broken relationships, houses divided, corporate rivalry, and a performance-enhancing broom. It was a year I'd like to forget. Broomgate, available now. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere.

Acast.com. This is a podcast from The Bugle. But what will the present look like afterwards? What might you change unintentionally? It's not worth it. It's not worth risking. The gargle. The sonic, glossy magazine to the bugle's audio newspaper for Visual World. All the news, none of the politics. I'm your host, Alice Fraser. Your guest editors for this week are Anabab Pal and James Colley.

Welcome back to the magazine. Hello, Alice. Thank you. Anything exciting been happening for you? I've got a good start of the year because I've just come up with a really a new recipe for baby formula that i really like which is handy because we also have a new baby around so i finally got someone to test all this baby formula out which is great because i was getting sick of it it's all one flavor it's lukewarm at best i always thought the formula for baby was uh sperm plus egg plus nine months and various

nutrients. Yeah, no, that's what I've been drinking. Is there a problem with that? Today's cover model is former reality show contestant turned internet gas bag Stephanie Matto, who in the dog-eat captioned picture of a cat world of online content turned to selling her farts in a jar as a money-making scheme. After raking in more than US$200,000, Matto was recently hospitalised with a suspected heart attack, which turned out to just be some side effects of mass fart production. She's now retired from fart production and is selling fart jar NFTs.

And you think this is satire, but this is just literally what has happened. The only way this story could be worse for everyone is if she turned from selling farts in a jar to selling fart NFTs in a jar I assume there's a jar at least you have to have something still if she had to release anything at least it's not another podcast I've realized I finally understand that I haven't been doing my economics classes right because I thought that the rule of farts was firstly whoever denied it supplied it and that's where you get your supply for the demand and so I've completely gone in circles around this and I have been absolutely

saturating the market with no return whatsoever I've bungled this whole thing this is the problem because she turned herself into an industrial fart factory by eating enormous quantities of beans and protein shakes and she gave herself really really unpleasant wind and thought she was having a heart attack but i think this is an instance in which occam's razor is probably at play where you think i'm having terrible terrible pain is it a heart attack or is it the horrible things i'm doing to my body in the name of fart wealth? This surely has to be at some point like if this existed in Karl Marx's time, like the books would have been three pages long because you could just say, surely any time where this exists as a viable means of employment, the system is broken in some form.

This should not be how things work. I mean, it is literally an Aesop's fable. She, by getting too greedy, she killed the goose that laid the golden eggs. She just, if she'd kept to a mere two protein shakes a day, she might have managed to sustain the output. But no. That's all the time we have for our front cover because now it's time for the satirical cartoon.

Today's satirical cartoon takes aim at Netflix. And you can tell because there's a sinking ship with Netflix written on it and then an ocean that says quality. That's satire. So generic. It's perilously close to being a meme. Let's get into the episode. Our first section in the magazine is our health section. Apparently laughter, lol, is the best medicine.

The NHS may be planning on prescribing comedians for people suffering from depression. Anuvab, you're in the UK right now. Can you unpack this on the scene? Yeah, I mean, look, if the venue's shut again, comedians will need a place to perform. And, you know, if everybody in the country is in these isolation wards, that seems to be exactly where you need to perform. You have loads of people who have a bit of a cold stuck in an NHS facility. You know, they are not coming to you. You have to go to them. I think it's a very good thing. I've actually done this before, Alice, Jim. I don't know if I've shared this with you, But years ago, I was performing at the Comedy

Stone Mumbai, and a gentleman came up and said, I really liked your set, and I'm having a kidney stone operation. Would you mind coming by the hospital and performing just for me? And because I thought it would be, you know, because every day I wake up in India and think, how much crazier can it get? And I really want to sort of put my money where my mouth is and go find out. So I showed up at the hospital and I performed in this ward for about four people, three of whom promptly went to sleep because they were on high doses of morphine. three of whom promptly went to sleep because they were on high doses of morphine. So UK is only catching up with insanities that we have been quite used to in our part of the world. I also use high doses of morphine to blame a crowd's poor reaction.

Is that why you hand out high doses of morphine before all of your shows, James Cullen? No, that's just to make the ticket price worth it. I don't hand out anything before the show. I just afterwards hand out my farts in a jar. Very valuable, very valuable things. I think that as the cases are surging, it seems like the authorities in this country, in Britain, have done sensible things by saying, we're not going to do anything, which seems like a reasonable response to any epidemic. And, you know, where will you find your audiences, you know, if they're all going to be either stuck at home or in these giant NHS tents.

And if you're already there with an infection, you might as well make some money out of it. So many of us in the last couple years have just sat around without income, you know, in bed. And now you can get an income from bed. I'm actually hugely behind this plan. I think this is a terrific plan. Firstly, let's kill off some comedians, free off some spots on some panel shows. We just pick off a couple, we've got some new spaces open. So this is comedians being used to treat trauma patients because we're worried that trauma patients haven't suffered enough.

And luckily comedians tend to be trauma patients. So it's got a nice circularity. We call it the Pagliacci health plan. But I am worried about a medical system where comedians treat one of your symptoms and then say, well, you can get the full cure exclusively on my Patreon. And then when they get to doing the autopsy, they say,

well, you know, it's like a bad reviewing festival season. The patient died, but the death certificate reads like a four star. I just feel like comedy is so very subjective that you could be causing more distress than you solve. Also, the only people I know with depression are comedians. Comedians are also the worst person to go to if you have a problem because they will say the least sensitive thing and then tell you that it's their black sense of humor, when in fact it's just their absolute failure to empathize and they're

just looking for your pain to give them a riff. Well, even the people selling this plan said that the hope for it, the hope was that they would help people, quote, gain a new perspective on their difficult experiences. And I've done some bad gigs, but I never want to be part of a gig so bad that a trauma patient goes, you know what, you're right. You do have it worse than me. Your ad section now, because I've been seriously reading every Christmas wishes email from every retail outlet and internalising their benevolent hope that I remain happy and well into the new year,

or at least well enough to buy their products. This episode of the podcast is brought to you by cryptocurrency, the money for beyond the grave. You can't take it with you, but the it in that sentence is stuff like real money, and this isn't, so maybe you can. Cryptocurrency. Buy, buy, buy, and find out when you die, die, die. Cryptocurrency. The only sleazy technobabble that guarantees you entry into the endless VIP lounge in the sky. And today's show is brought to you by the new keto-friendly cereal, a brick smeared in lion blood. A brick smeared in lion blood contains zero carbs

and is a handy snack for when you're on the go or defending yourself from that angry lion you just wounded with a brick. And do you need to be passive-aggressive to someone running a marathon? Don't try to keep up with them. Just hand them half a glass of water. Half a glass of water. Mature conflict resolution is for people with a full glass of water. Half a glass of water. Mature conflict resolution is for people with a full glass of water. ACAST powers the world's

best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Every sport has their big, juicy controversy. Boxing has the Mike Tyson ear bite. Cycling has Lance Armstrong. Baseball has its steroid era. Curling has... Broomgate. It's a story of broken relationships, houses divided, corporate rivalry, and a performance-enhancing broom.

It was a year I'd like to forget. Broomgate. Available now. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com Now it's time for your slick motoring section, Cars, Cars, Cars. This is our New Year's story set in France, as all good New Year's stories are.

The French tradition of burning cars on New Year's Eve has hit a roadblock. James Colley, you look like you can drive. Can you unpack this story? I adore this story So the French have cut back on burning cars on New Year's Eve Part of a French tradition Now there's only been, only been 874 cars burned in one night

Which might seem like a lot But we have to put that in scale By French standards 874 cars burned in one night which might seem like a lot but we have to put that in scale by french standards 874 cars burned in a night is equivalent to like a slightly spirited golf clap following a poetry reading like for australians would be the response to seeing a huntsman a little amped up but nothing to be concerned about for the english it's like uh invading a country and pillaging its resources but then leaving surprising restraint considering who you are. I think this is a really good plan.

It's all part of reducing emissions. And we are hoping that by 2050, they'll be strictly burning electric vehicles. And I love the part of the story I like the most is that he praised the law enforcement and the heightened police presence after the reduction in car burns. There were still 874 burned. What exactly, how low is the bar for policing? Well done, Constable. Only 90 arson cases on your watch tonight. Well done, French people.

I thought the most polluting thing you could do with a car was have a car. But it turns out the one step up from a car that burns fossil fuels is burning a car that burns fossil fuels it's like they're burying the lead here it's 874 cars and they set Notre Dame on fire again sorry they're really upset about that can we have money one more time to fix it this time for reals you know till I read the story I didn't know France had this tradition but you know with the French it's hard to know if something is a New Year's tradition or it's just their everyday strike against doing any productive work. Because they're always burning something and you don't know which category to put it in.

So clearly this burning is a New Year's Eve tradition not to be associated with the cars that are being burned against a four-hour workday. The real question is whether they burn other people's cars or whether they burn their own cars. Is this the smashing a plate on your own head or is this a throwing a brick through someone else's window of car burning? It depends how long the little pipe that your cigarette's on the end of goes for. If you can reach a secondary car before it drops you're okay well that's all the time we have for our motoring section because now it's time for your reviews as you know every week our guest editors bring in something to review out of five stars james collie what have you brought in for us today

i am reviewing hypnic jerks which isn't how i refer to david blaine and other mind freak type magicians, though they are hypnic jerks. It's that feeling when you think you're falling, but you're not actually falling. So at first it was terrifying. I felt like I was falling. And then I realized I was in a seat and could not fall. And it's actually quite relaxing. And I felt this incredible relief while being suddenly alert, like a shot of coffee had just gone through my veins and it was as if i had invented the world's laziest extreme sport your bungee jumping without leaving

your chair but then i realized on a more existential level we are all falling all of the time as we hurtle around a giant ball of flame which hurls around a super massive black hole which hurls around a we don't even know what and now i feel like i'm falling on a psychic level so two stars two stars it is james collie and ev and what have you brought in for us to review I will be reviewing bacon I've been thinking about bacon a lot are you doing paleo no it's not it's not part of a diet um it's just I've been thinking about bacon just you know out of any context I've been in the UK for some work and I looked at bacon and I said, I need to talk about bacon because I'll tell you why. It's pink, it's soft, it can be crunchy.

Most importantly, though, it's one of the few meats that does the thing it promises to do, which is be pink and meaty and fulfilling. There's a global context to it. Some cultures ban it, that's fine. Some other cultures have pet pigs, which is also fine because apparently pigs are clever. For those that eat it, though, there are very few meats that stick to the narrative because beef is now political. Chicken is deceptive. Lamb is exotic. Bacon is where it's at. I'm giving bacon three and a half stars.

That's better than hypnic jerks. I mean, the optimal experience, I assume, would be to fall out of your chair while having a mouthful of bacon. That's all the time we have for our review section because now it's time for our food section. This is our story, Tate's on a plane. Three planes have been commissioned to fly potatoes to Japan.

Anuvab, you've been on a plane and I assume you've eaten potatoes. Can you unpack this story for us? Yes, and I'm also part Japanese. This is something we haven't gotten to. So I'm an expert to talk about the story in a number of areas. Really? I didn't know you were part Japanese. Really? I didn't know you were part Japanese. Yeah, I'm not. But I just thought that there's something, you know, people are saying anything that they feel like. And I feel 2022 is my year to just say anything,

randomly, factually inaccurate things and see if I can defend them. This is a really interesting story where basically it seems Japan has run out of potatoes and American planes are flying potatoes into japan there's a shortage of spuds and so three seven four sevens loaded with potatoes are being flown to japan to meet the needs of mcdonald's and other healthy restaurants that deal with a french fry shortage and mcdonald's holdings japan said that they would only offer small sizes of french fries and because of the pandemic and there's some flooding at vancouver airport potatoes are not available in japan and in mcdonald's in tokyo large portions of fries are being rationed. This is a very dangerous sort of situation to be in. But, you know, here's my thing. I don't think that a country

that specializes in making really small things, you know, which is one of their great arts, you know, small trees, if you're going to like give them an option to do small fries, I think it may go down a path where we might end up with really tiny, tiny fries. And I don't know if we're ready for that either. I think this is a fascinating story because I feel like Japan has a very communitarian ethos. And if any country doesn't need French fries, it is Japan. And I say this because I think the one purpose of french fries is to teach the value of sharing because if you have chips hot chips and you do not share them

you're going against the order of nature hot chips are there to be shared if you don't share your hot chips the next time a seagull steals your chips that's the karma for not sharing your hot chips hot chips are essentially communist in their in their very essence uh and so i think that that japan doesn't need the lesson so they don't need the french fries james i felt conflicted about this because usually i love it when french fries hit a snag but um i think this is not the least healthy thing america has ever dropped on japan i do find it very interesting like to have 747s full of chips, which actually make them better for you

because air frying is much healthier. But I did like this as a global supply chain issue problem because I love the vision of a Deliveroo driver being stuck behind the ever-given wedge to the Suez Canal. Be like, your chips are on the way.

They might be cold by the time they get to you, but they will get to you. And I also really want to try what is left in Japan right now, because we all know the chips at the bottom of the bag taste the best. So how do the chips at the bottom of the bag of which they keep the bags of chips taste?

They must be incredible chips. I mean, my only memory of chips in Japan was that they had very strange flavors in the supermarkets and that's less about the chips in that in that case the chip is just the vessel for the flavors so you could just eat the flavors i have to say like i'm a big fan of uh because i'm wildly cultured anytime i go into another country i just want to see what their mcdonald's has and uh japan does not disappoint french fries are some of the least interesting things like a sausage roll with crumpets made of either end is much more interesting than french fries

you don't need this japan you're fine this story sort of reconnected me with the word spuds for potatoes and i just want to know what you guys think and why we don't use spuds more often uh in australia spuds is mostly reserved for a name for a rugby league player who has been beaten within a half inch of his life and is currently up on three charges of indecent assault. Wow, that sounds like a specific person. Sadly, no. All potatoes are one rugby player in Australia.

All rugby players are one rugby player in Australia. All rugby players are one rugby player in Australia. That's the goal of a scrum, is to join. It used to be called a hash. That's all the time we have for our food section now because now it is time for our New Year's resolution pull-out section. In this, the first episode of the year, we unpack some New Year's resolutions. So often, New Year's resolutions are stuff like lose weight or get in shape. But I, for one, do not subscribe to the school of thought that believes you're a more

virtuous human the less of you there is. Also, I'm not here to tell you not to hate yourself the way you are and want to improve. Maybe you're awful. Maybe a six-pack would help. Try it out. If you want to be thin or fat or jacked or a 16 dimensional psychedelic space jellyfish, go right ahead. Just don't start a blog about it. So in the spirit of New Year's resolutions, I'm going to tell you my list of New Year's resolutions. New Year's resolution number one, get better at lists.

Number seven, restore the stolen artifacts. Number three, linear time resumes. Number four, build your time machine. Number nine, actually, the real monster four, build your time machine. Number nine, actually, the real monster was Dr. Frankenstein all along. James and Anubhav, do you have any New Year's resolutions? Yes, I've got a whole bunch. I've decided that I'm going to use the words decaf and baby daddy out of context a lot this year. I don't know why I decided that. That's one of my resolutions. I also have some cultural resolutions. I plan to listen to the music of Drake. I hear he's a very famous man. I don't know about his music. And also the classical music of Brahms, but not together.

But I want to spend 2022 with Drake and Brahms. That's another thing. And the third thing is sort of an activity. I plan this year to make friends with the tailor because I feel like as I get into my late 40s, I will get to a point where my body shape is going to require me to just get tailor-made pants because retail may not have anything for my waist. And so I figure if I make friends with the tailor in 2022 I could get him to stitch me a pair of pants next year. I have

fantastic news for you because as you get into Drake you will find if anything he is a decaf baby daddy who has had a lot of run-ins with a very famous tailor. Done! I hadn't even made these connections thank you james and i knew that there was something connecting these things james collie this is the kind of mind that begins q and on what are your new year's resolutions uh it's my same resolution i have every year ensure that this year is the last how successful has that been so far? I'm getting better, honestly. It's getting closer and closer every year. I really thought I had it this year.

Now it's time for our money section. This is a story out of Bloomberg about cryptocurrency because that's our wheelhouse and how cryptocurrency could be like the music industry. The future of cryptocurrency might depend on whether people focus on the artist, on the label or on the venue. All of things which are either pivotal in your taste of music or not pivotal in your taste of music. James Colley, you're cooler than I am. Can you unpack this story?

Firstly, cast some doubt on that. I could tell that this was an important crypto story because i went over it about six times and i still don't understand what in the goddamn hell it is saying uh so from what i understand crypto could be like the music industry which means it makes a handful of people rich all while wildly overvaluing a series of cartoon gorillas uh it seems that crypto is selling out and going mainstream and immediately losing what made it cool in the first place. That's about as far as I can grasp into this piece, because I know that we're deep in what we will call the taint of the year right now, like right in that gap between Christmas and anything actually starting up again. But I had a biological reaction to trying to be taught

anything about cryptocurrency at this time of year well when i read this story i thought what they mean is cryptocurrency is is like music in that you go that's that's it and if i can sell that as an nft become immensely wealthy, then things will have come full circle and I will have won the internet or crypto. I will have won Web 3.0 is what I will have won. Anubhav, have you got any crypto holdings? Well, you know, here's the thing. I mean, what you just pointed out, Alice, could be your road to sort of fame and fortune because nowadays, it seems with crypto, no one knows what the role of money is. I mean, I, for one, have taken all my savings and put it into Shiba Inu coin,

which I think is a kind of cryptocurrency focusing on a particular kind of Japanese dog. And who is to say that that isn't as valuable or less valuable than the Indian rupee or the US dollar. The other thing that basically encourages me to jump into crypto is that you will realize that financial advice in the old days was doled out by men in suits, you know, looking very sort of gray and, you know, wise and telling you what to do with your investments. And these ads would have people shaking hands. The new generation of investors trying to get you to invest in crypto are called finfluencers. These are influencers that just focus on the finance industry on Instagram and the way they get you to invest. And I have put all my

money into this. So of course it's safe. They get you to invest in a stock or a bond by dancing under the name of the stock or the bond on instagram so the the thing the ticker floats above them and i highly recommend you checking out some of these people and they usually dance sometimes to drake which is which is why my desire to get to know the gentleman more and then you are really lured into investing into this so i've sold my house and uh i've trump to convince my wife as well that we take both our savings and put it either into this dog or into an influencer dancing under a stock that I've never heard of. And if you guys are not doing that with your money, I don't really know what you're doing with your life. Well, I mean, we've all learned a lot in

the last five years from thinking that Bitcoin was that thing where when you held a Lord's horse and he flipped you a gold galleon and then you chomped it with your teeth to check if it was counterfeit or not and then handed it to somebody else for goods and services to this new world where Bitcoin is something else entirely, which I would explain, but I'm not going to. James? I'm excited for the financial crash here because like in the 1920s, the financial crash was all depressing and you had to mop up a lot of Wall wall street whereas now we're going to get a financial crash that is very well choreographed and with the fantastic soundtrack yeah exactly and look if when i lose all my money i'm going to turn around and say but i really trusted this 19 year old who is doing these

videos from his parents basement and i don't know why i you know his predictions would be wrong and i think the world will understand me i'm so sorry i bought into this pyramid scheme long before i realized what pyramids were built for that's all the time we have for your money section now because now it's time for your nature section a squirrel has gone on an absolute bloody rampage an Anuvab Pal, you're from the land of animals going on absolute bloody rampages. But in this instance, it is not in India, it's in Wales. Can you tell us more about this story? Yeah, in fact, you know, I'm in the UK right now. And I've been staring at some crazy squirrels outside my window. But basically,

what's happened is, in a Welsh town basically one particular squirrel has been attacking pensioners pets and children uh jumping at people taking you know people who are taking out the garbage he's been attacking these people as people sort of run down the streets in abject fear the town of Buckley in Wales has a lot of residents who have been left bitten and bruised by the attacks. And some people have even taken tetanus jabs. It's also attacked cats. And basically, the town has called this squirrel a bloodthirsty psycho squirrel. And they have called the attack a Christmas rampage. Now, I know that in Australia,

we have a lot of crazy animals. We have a lot of crazy animals in India. I've been seeing some squirrels, you know, having sandwiches and so on outside my window in London. And I'm surprised there aren't more squirrel attacks in the world. And about every time you're in London, I think maybe you're Paddington. Yeah, the squirrels make sandwiches now. Yeah. Well, there's one that I saw just running around with a half eaten sandwich that it had just run off with what looked like some really nice brioche and was having a better lunch than I was, you know, which leads me to think, you know, what took squirrels so long to go on a rampage? Maybe it's a political thing. Maybe there's some history of whales and squirrels.

I don't understand. You know, maybe it's an Indian squirrel that feels like it needs to do something for empire retribution. I don't know what's going on, but I sort of feel like I've never trusted squirrels entirely. And this one sole incident of the crazy psycho squirrel going on a rampage is indeed sort of the beginning of something, I feel, of many squirrels going on a rampage across the United Kingdom. I don't know if you guys see this as the end of a wave or the beginning of a wave. James? Well, firstly, I don't think we can be surprised when a squirrel went nuts.

And I think this is a regular, yeah, you know what, look, there's low-hanging fruit, which is much easier for a squirrel to eat, but sometimes you've a regular yeah you know what look there's low hanging fruit which is much easier for a squirrel to eat but sometimes you've got to take the low hanging fruit i think this is a regular problem for the welsh because as far as i could tell their lives are entirely held within the bounds of a children's book albeit a children's book that doesn't seem to contain any vowels and i have been reading aesop's fables to my daughter because i want her to be insufferable and i was trying to work out what the moral of the squirrel and the whale might be and i think it's this if you've been humiliated by a squirrel don't go to the press keep that to yourself because if everyone knows

a squirrel can take you and win my friend You will end up bullied by the entire animal kingdom. Like, you know, when like a Disney princess gets dressed by three little blue birds, it will be the opposite of that. Those blue birds are going to wreck your shit. They're going to take your lunch money and steal your girlfriend. Yeah, I mean, I think James is onto something. I think old man Aesop himself was probably part of a crazy squirrel attack where they ran off with his brioche sandwich so you know maybe that's where it came from all of Aesop's fables are just based on

personal vendettas against particular animals that time a frog tricked him across a river yeah yeah I could tell a good story about a rabbit but I knew a rabbit who was a real c*** exactly just write about what you know

and old man Esop knew that. He figured that out. Yeah, they're not morality tales. They're just actual... This is revenge porn. It's just like a shit day at the zoo. Old Egypt

or wherever he was writing these every day was about some animal pissing him off and him writing... It's a memoir. It's not a morality tale. It's just a blog.

It's a blog. Today's fable is the seagull that's got to f*** off or get a memoir. It's not a morality thing. It's just a blog. It's a blog. Today's fable is the seagull that's got to f*** off or get a kicking. The ants that won't take a f***ing hint. Well, that's all the time we have for our animal section. Let's flip through to the ads at the back. Anuvab, have you got anything to plug? Yeah, I'm supposed to be in the uk to do something for an organization you're quite familiar with alice they're called amazon and uh i i might

have to do a small little recording for him uh for him him specifically for jeff bezos but it's all up in the it's supposed to be the 17th of january Soho Theatre. I don't even know if it's a plug because it's sort of up in the air and it's a semi-plug, I guess. Go to the Soho Theatre if you are in London and see Anna Verbe's new hour. James, have you got anything to plug? Yeah, actually. For once, I actually have something to plug.

If you are tired of your podcast not lasting for five hours, well, have I got the five-hour podcast for you. It's called The Collie Problem alice is on the first episode the second one is coming soon but i must stress they are five hours long and it takes a while to put it all together oh look i i think as somebody who did the last post i am not one to balk at the concept of doing something because you can something way too long and deeply impractical something because you can. Something way too long and deeply impractical just because you wonder if you could. Exactly.

It's the Ozymandias of podcasting. Next time you have five hours to spare, go and download James Colley's The Colley Problem. I'm Alice Fraser. You can find me online at patreon.com slash alicefraser or on Twitter and Instagram at atalitative, A-L-I-T-E-R-A-T-I-V-E. It's my birthday on the 7th of January, so wish me a happy birthday.

I'd like to say a big thank you to our roving reporters, Peter R., who gave us the story about the comedians being prescribed on the NHS. Peter Long, it's a very Peter-heavy week, who gave us the story about the French burning cars. Mort Soubité, who gave us potatoes on a plane. And that's all. If you have stories that you'd like to send us in, tweet us at at HelloGogglers and become one of our roving reporters.

Save me from doing any work. You're listening to The Goggle. This is a Bugle podcast and Alice Fraser production. Your executive producer is Christopher Skinner. Your editor, who is magnificent, is Ped Hunter. I'll talk to you again next week. You can listen to other programs from The Bugle, including The Bugle, who is magnificent, is Ped Hunter. I'll talk to you again next week. You can listen to other programs from The Bugle,

including The Bugle, The Last Post, Tiny Revolutions, and The Gargle, wherever you find your podcasts.