The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 133 - Fantastic Priests and Where to Find Them

Episode Date: December 12, 2017

The heroes arrive at the dwarven Sky Citadel of Janderhoff, each with their own personal business to attend to. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Temples in the distance. Bustling market squares. Gold-plated everything. Silver-plated everything. The heroes approach a breathtaking city. As you approach guards outside the tunnels leading into the city. What is your business in Yanderhof? And hope to find a moment's peace.

Baron, you get to have some of your old drinks. I mean, great ales from all around the world. But evil still lingers beneath the surface. You can feel the darkness permeating. A sense of dread, perhaps. Yes. It's palpable. Infecting even the incorruptible.

Matthew, you always play a woman who's disappointed with us, and today we play men disappointed in you. The adventure reaches Yanderhaan right now. Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of the Glass Cannon Podcast. It's your boy, Grant Berger, aka Baron Ashpeak. Guys, we are coming up on the holiday season, and I want to wish everyone out there a Merry Christmas, a Happy Hanukkah, and a joyous Kwanzaa. I'm excited to head back to Dallas this Christmas and spend time with the fam, and I hope everyone out there gets time to spend time with their loved ones this month. Please, be sure to grab all of your loved ones' phones

and subscribe to the Glass Cannon Podcast on their iTunes account. Hey, if you're identical twins like my nieces, just grab your twin's iPhone X and hack into their account with your face. Just kidding. So, speaking of family get-togethers, Skid is back from Denver, and while I wish he could be doing this intro, I can tell you that he cannot shut up about what a great time he had at the meet-up in Denver, and how much fun he had talking with everyone there. I can also tell you how excited we are to be in a studio finally.

This space is really going to open up a ton of possibilities for us, even as it's creating a million and one headaches on its own. The fact that we're even in a studio is all thanks to your support on Patreon. Again, without your support, we never would have reached the milestone that we did this Friday, which is unlock Skid's own actual play podcast in the ruins of Aslanth. So to everyone out there who pledges, thank you so much. And while we're talking about Patreon and our patrons, I just want to recap the situation that has fallen into our lap as we understand it now.

In the past, Patreon has charged content creators themselves the fees necessary to process pledges. However, this cost is now being passed on to supporters. We know that this puts people who are already on tight budgets into a difficult situation. And I'm going to start by apologizing for this coming out of the blue. It surprised us just as much. And even though this wasn't our decision, we understand it may have caused you inconveniences or confusion along the way. Your support, each and every one of you, has put us in a position to where we can really knock 2018 out of the park and get the ball rolling on everything we've been talking about. We really hope that you'll be able to keep your pledges going, and we promise to continue to deliver great bonus content for those that do.

And while 2018 may be the year of the dog in the Chinese Zodiac calendar, it's going to be a glass cannon puppy, and we're going to grow it into a badass top dog. We promise to do everything we can to get better day by day, and we want to thank you for coming along this incredible journey with us. Speaking of delving into an incredible journey, I want to thank those of you who came out and hung out with me while I was on my lonesome with Xenoblade Chronicles 2. Remember that every Friday we're going to bring new exciting games and hang out with you guys, and you can join us and get to know the rest of the GCP nation in the chat room at twitch.com slash the glass cannon. And guys, as a holiday present to all of you, we are excited to announce our new and improved website. Visit it today and check out all of the new content. We have pictures of every monster and major character

from episode 1 to 133 up for your perusal. We have our old articles from Tumblr, like Joe's We Are Stupid, and we have a merch store up, so pick up a hat or a shirt today. In 2018, each and every one of us will be updating the blog with our own content. So you're going to want to bookmark

glasscannonpodcast.com and make it the front page of your internet. Take that Reddit. Anyways, without further ado, I would like to welcome each and every one of you to episode 133. There have been many special days in the history of the Glass Cannon Podcast. Take you back to June 16th, 2015. A young Joe Piscopo taught a nation how to laugh. Episode one premiered to tens of listeners all around the globe five of them were us five of them were us downloaded twice from two different devices then episode 50 who could forget that

if you're just starting today and listening to 133 stop what you're doing because i'm about to ruin it for you gormley dies episode 50 you were about to say if you're just starting today you can't you can't like you just wait till you get to episode 50 right and then you realize to actually stop i didn't actually well they shouldn't have started at one they shouldn't they should have known not to start their own damn fault you know what i'm gonna start at the newest one and work my way back i don't like mysteries and uh yeah i really like prequels well i just thought it would be addressing the most current events all right what happened oh i don't even remember i don't flash forward to uh this last march launched Patreon. Can't remember the exact day. But June of this year, announced a partnership with Paizo.

Why is today special? Because for the first time in over two and a half years of recording like a garage band, packing up shop and moving from apartment to apartment airbnb floor to dingy alley we are in our own recording studio this is nice it's very nice i never want to go home there's something very cozy about the loft feels like a little tree house like Like it's one giant bunk bed. I just want to go hang out in the loft and cuddle with myself. My cats would love it here. But more importantly... Yeah! We're up at the champagne room, motherfucker!

We could call it the champagne room, that up there. That should be the name of the studio. The loft. Oh, the loft. The loft should be the champagne room. studio oh the loft should be the champagne room you know what they say about the champagne room um what what do they say lots of sex it's gonna be so much sex in the studio that was the first rule we put down there will be no sex in the studio grant sorry too late everyone walked in today and it was quite a scene let me tell you

i was not expecting that so exciting with the super no less that's how we got such a good deal um oh we are so punchy um well we are moved in we are ready to go but it is time to move in to a new chapter in the story of these five intrepid heroes pembroke lork sir will faraza Will, Farazza, and Baron. In the distance, you see Yanderhoff. Yanderhoff! A marvel of architecture, both modern and ancient. Now, Lork, we've already established you've been here before. Yes.

You know what to expect. You probably weren't warmly greeted by the dwarves. Oh, a green skin. Awesome. Yeah. But you were traveling with the Black Arrows. I would assume they were a mix of everybody. Yeah, there was a certain amount of respect given to them, I think.

Yeah. It's a nice watch. Right. They're welcome in every village. You've been to all the towns in and around the Mindspins during your Black Arrow days, but it's probably been 20 years since you've been here, wouldn't you say? 25, maybe? No, 20, yeah. Yeah.

About 20. As you approach, you see these tunnels leading in. That's the only way in. Guards outside the tunnels leading into the city. Pembroke, correct me if I'm wrong, but you've only read about this, right? Have you been? Yeah, I don't think Pembroke has ever been here.

I mean, he definitely knows a lot about it just from reading, but yeah. It's got to be exciting. Oh, yeah. This has a very Lord of the Rings feel, which I'm sure you can get excited about. Yeah, it's a combination of Moria, Khazad-dum, and the movies like Gandalf coming over the rise and seeing Minas Tirith for the first time. Yes. Yes. Yeah.

It's beautiful. The beauty of it cannot be understood. Farazza, you're no stranger to architectural wonders, I'm sure, growing up in Osiria. Full of them. But I would imagine you can't help but be impressed with what you see ahead of you. I'm sure, yes.

I'm sure she's impressed. But then again, she's impressed but then again she's a druid so is she gonna be that into man-made things i mean sure okay people gotta live you're a tough nugget to crack matthew not farazza but no a fair point i mean maybe there's some uh i'm sure there's some druids hanging out there. Maybe you can find some and share some old druid stories. We can get a little nasty with the plank growth. Sir Will, I would think you probably have never felt so small. Seeing this massive city, these massive walls.

Sure, yeah. And other people, small of stature, like yourself. But there has to be a humbling feeling, especially as someone who takes everything so emotional. As a follower of Shailen, as well as Ioma Day, you have to appreciate the beauty. and all that stuff. But I think he also is just excited. I mean, I think the halfling part of him is excited for this new adventure to see and interact in a new place that is civilized, a civilized place, which he's very much looking forward to seeing.

I'm sure all of you have your ideas of what you'd like to do inside Yanderhoff. You haven't been in a civilization in a long time. All of you. And Baron, you know how this works. Only way in are those tunnels. And they're guarded.

You guys roll up. How are we transporting Lork? Did we decide he's still on horse for Raza? I think that's what it was, right? Yeah, or I mean, how many days did it take us to get here? it took three three and a half days yeah she's probably just carrying one horse back just not worth building a litter can you be a horse all day long eight hours eight hours okay i'll see your travel but then i can just unwild shape and wild shape back if we're making if we're trying to make good time i would have to imagine that is uh three and a half days of riding faraza

has to bring you guys a little bit closer. Can you talk as a human? As a matter of fact, I can. You can't. Oh. Like Mr. Ed? Really? Hello.

You just have to put peanut butter on her teeth. And it looks like. Just on the roof of my mouth. And it seems like she's talking. Exactly. Gilbert Godfrey is playing the voice of Farazza as the horse. Hey, look. are we there yet i know as a matter of fact faraz took the wild wild speech feat so she can

that's how she can cast all of her spells with verbal components get out of here that is a cool feat i'd never heard of that so she can speak any language she knows wait you have to have wild speech and natural spell to cast spells with a verbal component yeah while wild shaped yeah so all those years years of cheating exposed i take it back nope natural spell allows you to do it oh well there's wild speech then just a completely wasted feat i't know. Just allows you to converse. Allows you to have Gilbert Godfrey come in. I think I also took it because it allows me to speak with other animals in their language when I'm in one. That's what it is. Interesting.

Yeah. So I did want to talk to Howie at some point, but I have to become a vermin. You vermin. Well, you guys roll up. I'm sorry. Am I the only one that thinks it's hysterical that you have to become a vermin to communicate with someone from Boston?

Man, the Pathfinder thought of everything. Oh, Joe. Oh, Joe. So you roll up an old man, a incapacitated greens skin, a horse, a talking horse, a small... Hello, my friend. Hello, my friend. Hello.

Hello. And a halfling on an armored wolf. And his name is Lexington. A dwarf. And so, Baron, you see they kind of give, especially Lork, an eye, but they see that he's incapacitated. And they say, only in Dwarven,

which I know you speak, I would assume Pembroke speaks. Pembroke also speaks. So does Farrazza. Ferrazza, that makes sense. Understand. And they're like, what is your business in Yanderhof?

We're here to return the remains of a few very brave citizens of Yanderhof to their family. And how did you come about to find them? Were they part of your party? They were. They were the Nargrimikens, Inger Hilden Amlo.

I don't know if you're familiar. I'm not. But you seem to be of our kind. All right, just don't cause any trouble. Seems like this one won't be causing any trouble for a long time, so you may pass. He lets you in.

Nice to meet you, my friend, the horse says. Ha! I take it back! You're not allowed in! You walk inside this tunnel and I hope I haven't given the wrong impression when I say tunnel because the only thing that's not

luxurious about them is the non-existent views because they are gorgeous there isn't a piece of exposed rock that hasn't been masterfully carved into some shape, either decorative or symbolic.

Baron, you see symbols everywhere. Even though most of you would know that the dwarves mine the shit out of this mountain, you don't see blue-collar dwarven coal miners walking around covered in soot. Gold-plated everything. Silver-plated everything. Copper. Temples in the distance. Bustling market squares, all underground, of course. Commerce. Intense, flavorful smells of what would be pretty exotic food for most of you, I'm sure, and a bittersweet reminder of home for Baron.

After about 10, 15 minutes of walking around, I would imagine you don't know if you've ascended upwards towards the heart of the mountain, or you've gone halfway down to the center of the earth. With all the twists and turns, and the elevation is so subtle as you move through, you don't know where you are. But you are in a dwarven sky citadel. One of the last remaining ones. And it is breathtaking. So risk a little more light. taking it's a risk a little more light you all have business that you want to attend to some you know just selling and

buying of goods upgrading yourselves for the battles to come some probably more personal but I would assume pretty quickly you're gonna want to find a base of operations I don't know how long you're gonna be in yander hoff but am I correct in quickly you're going to want to find a base of operations. I don't know how long you're going to be in Yanderhof, but am I correct in assuming you might want to find an inn or something that you can kind of return to as you all go off and do your own things? That would be very nice, I think.

These old bones could stand with a feather bed. Sir Will would actually offer to do the research and pick the place and reserve the rooms and take care of it. Send out an email. He has a particular taste that he's looking for. Okay. What is that taste? Hot baths are essential.

And lots of space, comfortable bedding, and room service, obviously. Are we staying for free on your Starwood hotel points? I've got so many points racked up, Sheriff. It'll be five. All right, so you know exactly the place to go to. I don't know the place. I'm going to look around. You ask around.

You look around. I feel like Sir Will can kind of sniff it out. The right people, the right vibe. He can tell a good place to stay when he sees one. So gathering information and using your natural knowledge and whatnot, you find... Yeah, roll a gather information diplomacy check. This is good. We're going to be staying in the sewer.

Knowledge nobility. Get all knowledge nobility. Oh, yeah. I got knowledge nobiles. Oh, no, I don't. That's so pathetic. That's a great paladin. Oh, that's right.

You don't. It's a great paladin. Noble bird. A noble, a paladin of noble birds. You know, the thing about paladins is that they're not very skilled. They don't have a lot of skills. Are you going to read us an entire archetype right now? Hey, man. I'm just trying to shut out the fans. not very skilled. You don't have a lot of skills. Are you going to read us an entire archetype right now? No.

Hey, man. I'm just trying to shut out the fans. I'm sorry that you're so hateful of the people that listen to this show. I know you just read Halflings of Galarian last week, but maybe you can enlighten us. I should tell everybody, we've been setting up the studio for the last 12 hours. We're all completely exhausted. We

had to get this, record this episode today. So we're one bad die we had to get this record this episode today so we're one bad die roll from all killing each other i do have knowledge and ability better than my diplomacy so oh there you go there we go 20 20 okay um yeah you find out there is a great place um if you had failed you were going to be sent to this, like, half, like, a seedy motel slash, like, strip club called the Hammer and Thongs. Wait, I thought you said, if we failed? You wanted something obscure. I know. I was going to send you to the Hammer and Thongs.

I know exactly the place. Let me tell you, this is a great place. Is Gilbert Godfrey a new NPC? What is this? I know a great place. It's a bisexual strip club called Hammer and Thongs. They got a little bit for everybody. For the listeners, Troy is also squinting. Just like Gilbert Gottfried does it.

No, you find out about a place called the Gilded Hammer. Sounds good. Not too far from where you guys are. I have a new hammer myself. Ah, how apropos. Guys, check in. Beautiful bar area. Lobby bar.

Pool bar? No, swim up bar. Aby bar. Pool bar? No pool bar. Swim up bar? Yeah, a swim up, a hot pool. Spring bar? It's not in season. It's late October. Concierge? There is a concierge, yes. He recommends doing some tubing

in the morning. You might do tubing. Swim with the turtles. So, you know, there's a bustling bar, lots of dwarves, but you do see noblemen walking in and about. You would imagine there's caravans that come through with rich, rich nobles, and they let their slaves do a lot of the work while they stay in the nice hotels. So you guys are there, and it's pretty early in the day. You guys got a good jump on the day um for us you can probably jump out of horse form if you want to lay lork down but if lork has business

to do which i i know you do um you're gonna have to decide how you want to get around let's talk about what people want to do like what did baron want to do so baron really wants to uh take ingrahild and umlo's remains to their family uh that's gonna be tough i mean he's not sure he's in a weird position because he wants to invite uh well i don't even know if lork would want to take ingrahild ashes back after almost being decapitated with her but he wants to to invite Lorik and maybe Sir Will along. But he's also worried about what the Nargrimkin's reaction will be to seeing a half-orc at their door with news of their child being dead. And he doesn't know how to broach that.

And then he also became an Inquisitor kind of in the wilds. So he'd like to visit the High Temple of Torag here in Yanderhoff and kind of get his blessing and maybe kind of settle some questions. And if there's any chance, any time left, he'd like to kind of research the name Ashpeak at all. Ah, okay. Busy day. Busy day for Baron. He's got a lot on the docket. Roll a diplomacy check. Just kind of talking to the concierge. See if day. Busy day for Barrett. Busy day for Barrett. He's got a lot on the docket. Roll a diplomacy check,

just kind of talking to the concierge, see if he knows about the Nargrimkins. Okay. So diplomacy gets a 18. 18. Just like the guards up front, and now a different class of people, the concierge

also doesn't know of them. So you might have to uh on your way to visit the high temple of of torag and uh you know research in the libraries about the ash peak name you may have to try and find out some more information sorry is this a little weird is isn't nargrim steelhand like a legendary dwarf? Yes. So like the name Nargrimkin doesn't ring any bells to them? Does not ring any bells to them.

Well, it was a long time ago, and his tomb was so lost to time and history that they got lost looking for it. Yeah. So yeah, it is rather interesting. Did you expect to come in and there'd be posters of Nargrim Steelhand everywhere? No, I just thought they would recognize the name. Right, so it's interesting that they don't. Yeah.

They were liars. You might have to dig a little bit more. Find out what exactly. Just carrying around Umlo's remains. Into their insides with a dagger. Lying thieves. Start slaughtering. Dwarven turncoats.

That is the only possible solution to this problem. Oh, my gosh. What is Sir Will interested in doing on this day? Sir Will is, if Baron says anything to him about doing this, he is all about it um he he thinks that they should all get cleaned up first he doesn't think that they should go anywhere in the condition that they're in uh mainly because it's just rude to kind of show up stinking and uh covered in dried blood yeah so uh but it's also just a pleasure thing. Like, he wants to get all cleaned up.

So that's really the first thing on his mind. And then he wants to go to the first church of Iomedae that he can find. Yeah, I'm sure even though this is Dwarftown, there will be a church of Iomedae. You might have to dig a little. Hopefully, yeah. Way more churches of Tuareg. And he'll fall back on a church of Tuareg. Absolutely. He just wants to go to a church of Torag, absolutely.

He just wants to go to a church. He wants to get to some clergy. Farazza, what business do you have in Yanderhof? I mean, Farazza wants to pick up some new armor, but I think otherwise she kind of wants to hang out with the Trunowans and just kind of like hear about the city that she's been

sent to find that's ultimately she wants to go back there and find out what happened find out what happened so she's happy to go along with hang out with the trunowans eventually she's gonna have we're gonna have to figure out a plan but for now she's happy to go with so lork and baron in particular yeah have a special interest to you because they may be able to um reveal information that might connect some dots for you about your especially lork he's a native calling exactly from the mean streets of true now pembroke what what do you what do you want to do here uh pembroke has read about this place his entire life and um he's uh well he'd like to get cleaned up a bit i suppose and he'd want to do here? Pembroke has read about this place his entire life and he's, well he'd like to get

cleaned up a bit I suppose and he'd like to do some shopping to acquire some more spells to make up the loss of his spell books but it also, there is a, he's heard that there is a spectacular natural cave formation that was

uncovered by dwarven miners here in 3402 ar and was left as is out of their reverence for natural stone and it is supposed to be one of the great sites in the all of arisia i'd really like to see that so he grabs a pamphlet from the rack outside the concierge's desk uh on the way in and you know feyraza might be interested in seeing that as well as a druid who's interested in like the natural state of things.

Maybe you guys could bond over that. That sounds delightful, my new friend. Would you like to come with me? I would be delighted. And he says, as in ancient Assyriani, as the eagle accompanies the falcon

and the hunt for the fish, we shall go together under the earth. Under the earth. And the hunt for the fish, we shall go together under the earth. Under the earth. And then you've got Lork. Lork, you're kind of a burden.

Obviously, you can't just... All right, guys, I'll see you later. I'm going to go do my own thing. Just crawl about town. Dragging yourself through the middle of Times Square. Oh, God. Just wanted to get a sandwich. Sorry. My friends are very busy.

You could get a little cart like Eddie Murphy had. Yeah, trading places. Rolling down the streets. So there's stuff you want to do, but what is your plan for getting around? Talk to me about what you want to do and what your plan is. Who are you going to hitch but like what is your plan for getting around and talk to me about what do you want to do and what your plan is who you're gonna hitch your wagon to uh well i think lork is his primary objective is to try to get his feet back and he has a vague recollection of a priest a dwarven priest here that was able to do that kind of magic uh because he had done it before if memory serves for uh black arrows in the past

and so he he thinks that this is a place where he can get that done and his primary objective is to get that done but he also needs to talk to feyraza because of what she is looking for and he knows information that she needs to know ah and so i i would imagine it's possible that even on horseback he's like could you you know accompany me to this place and then he wants to talk to her um when he arrives right and i'm sure she's already expressed interest to you that like she wants to talk to you as well as a maid of Trinnellan. She wants to Baron. And if she brought it up before, he probably deflected a little bit and was like, when we get to Yanderhoff, when we get to Yanderhoff. He's just kind of putting it off.

I bet that horse wouldn't shut up the entire. And then what happened? All right, then. And then what happened? All right, then. So, Baron, you guys bathe up as much as you want to take part in the sort of extravagance that this particular, the Gilded Hammer allows. When you're ready, Baron, you can go and do your thing. So you head out looking first for a Temple of Torag, hoping along the way to garner some information about the Nargrim kids

and you know I imagine you sort of in a fugue state walking about just looking at all these dwarves in a society together and you were a part of that back in the

Five Kings Mountains obviously this is a much different scenario than the the more rustic upbringing that you had i would think um was it fancy um well the five kings mountains themselves are kind of you know sprawling and there's all sorts of different areas there's anywhere from slums to the upper class to everything. So I would say, if anything, this place is more centralized. It might be like going from Los Angeles to New York City and seeing everything kind of packed in together. So you're walking about, and it's pretty easy to ask a couple people where the temple of

Torag is and on your way there you kind of spy out of the corner of your eye a couple of kids playing catch and the ball rolls up and lands at your feet and a little kid runs

away from probably his brother with his mother and father in the distance and like looks at you because the ball lands at your feet. And Baron reaches down to pick it up. And as he looks up to hand it to the to the boy, he kind of remembers being a boy himself. And he kind of shakes his head and isn't sure where he is for a moment. And kind of all of his childhood kind of flashes in front of him and he says, here's your ball. Can I ask you what your name is?

And the boy looks very shy like he's not supposed to talk to strangers. He says, my name is Runyon. Runyon, what do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be a warrior. That's a lonely path, Runyon. Why don't you go home tonight and give your parents a hug before you go to bed? He kind of scurries off, and by now the mother has kind of walked towards you and just grabs the son and kind of gives you a weird look.

Because you've got to be... You've got to be a sight. Yeah, you've got to be a sight. I don't know if you've got a good shave. We be a sight I don't know if you got a good shave we all do and she just kind of you know currently nods and ushers him away but you can tell they're looking at you like you're an outsider

and Barrett's just totally disoriented he hasn't seen like a family of dwarves in ages ages he's the first dwarves he came across were Angerheld and Umlolo watch both of them die and has their remains in his bag of holding um and he just never he never thought that he would be back in an urban area of dwarves again he thought he'd be kind of out in the belks and

outskirts kind of being a gunslinger and here he is so he's just out of it but he's looking for signs for a church now yep and you do see the church and you pass by even more families taking their wednesday stroll whatever day of the week it is um and you walk up to these beautiful, ornate doors that are open kind of at the end of this cobblestone road. You walk inside and it appears to be pretty empty. Pews go all the

way up to the front. This huge altar. Last time you were in a cathedral, you were having battle after battle after battle. This is certainly not a cathedral definitely not the size of what you're used to but it's there's not a stone that hasn't been shaped for that has some meaning to it it's very hallowed the minute you pass over the the threshold you can feel the presence of torak but you don't see any one in there um so in lieu of a rectory or kind of a church dwarf lady at

the front that i could ask questions for wasn't that special i uh dana carvey and gilbert godfrey in the same episode what great booking we used to get daniel craig and daniel day lewis so now we're going with these c-list comedians um anyway so um we spent all our money on the studio with our yearly budget uh so baron is going to kind of uh walk down the aisle of the church through the pews kind of rubbing his hair in shame like kind of the work he sees here versus the work he carved into the chelish devil. Kind of met the same things and just kind of a wonder

of what it's kind of supposed to look like when it's all working out. Hopefully he'll stumble upon some clergy as he goes back more. So if he walks down there maybe he sits at like one of the pews towards the front. Just kind of sits there and thought

and after a little while a kindly older dwarven man sidles from the other long side of the pew up towards you and says Welcome my son what brings you to

torag's hallowed halls well father my name is baron ashpeak and um i've been a wandering soul for some time and I've been doing a lot of soul searching in my journeys and I think I've dedicated my life to Torag again but I did it on my own time and I'm looking for the authority to actually be an inquisitor of Torag ah yes a inquisitor of Torag yes

an inquisitor that is a usually a much more difficult and involved path than that of a cleric are you emotionally interested in

choosing a more militant path toward Torag. I've seen what's out there, Father. And I know that it's not just going to take the strength we've been given by God himself, Torag. But we're going to have to end up using the enemy's own magic and weapons against them. going to have to end up using the enemy's own magic and weapons against them and i i just can't do that in good conscious without knowing i'm in good standing with the church well i unfortunately i do not have the power to tell you that you will have to look within yourself look within your actions have you lived a good life lately I don't know about that father

I've always tried to do things to help everyone else around me but I've killed in cold blood a man named Screed who was running away from me I met a friend a dead friend's ex-lover's wife after he died and I was unkind to her

I hired a killer to help me on my quest without thinking about the consequences and I handed a gun To help me on my quest without thinking about the consequences. And I... I handed a gun... I handed a gun to my friend, Umlo, and offered him to kill himself because I thought it would be better than living this way. So I don't know what kind of life... I don't know what kind of life i don't know what kind of life i'm living anymore father

he like reaches and around and puts his hand on your shoulder it's all right my son it's all right the path to a righteousness whether it be an inquisitor a fighter fighter, a holy man, it doesn't matter. You have to atone for your sins. How do I do that, Father? You ask, what would Torak do? I've got it on this bracelet on my wrist.

Every time you're about to do something, you ask, what would Torak do? No, you... God. Unfortunately, in these times that we live in, killing is a part of life. You need to survive. And sometimes that means removing your opponent from the face of Galarian. But you must ask yourself, why are you doing it i'd like to think i've always been doing everything i've done in order to to help save the small folk of this town called true now and and there's some

real evil out there i'm thinking it might help save even more people than that. But sometimes I think I might just be keeping myself this busy to run from my past. I ran away from my family and I'm trying to figure out what my true calling is. And hopefully I'll find it in Torek. But as long as you think I can use my best judgment to figure that out on my own, I'll keep on doing that, Father. best judgment to figure that out on my own. I'll keep on doing that, Father. Well, just you coming here shows that you're probably on the right path.

Judgment. Use your judgment. I'll try to take my mantle as the protector of Belkson. I know I've dealt with pious men and I've dealt with dirty fiends and I guess talking with you I know that leaves me somewhere in between. As much as I've tried to be Torag's hand on this plane I've come to realize I'm a fisher in a way. A fisher of men. And if I can't kill these people tearing this world apart I'll find someone who can in my place in Torag's name hopefully I'm the tip of the iceberg the edge of the avalanche the crest of the tsunami that will crash down upon all who stand against the small folk of this world and will wash away their sin I've set into motion something much bigger than I could have imagined.

Torag's will be done. Bam. He nods, cups you on the shoulder, and walks away. Now, Sir Will, you have a similar interest. You want to head to a temple of ioma day i do

it's funny too because it's for pretty similar reasons shockingly so you have a little bit harder time you know you get all cleaned up you shine up your armor shine up lexington's armor are you taking lexington with you uh no no i i would um i would i would have selected a place that had some sort of stable sure yeah sure so he'll be well taken care of there i gave a little extra little extra coin to the uh dwarven boy that was handling the horses. Take extra care of this little wolf. He bit it to make sure it was real. So are you walking about in your armor or in your finery? No, in finery. Oh, okay.

All right, so you've got your Sunday best on, your Wednesday best. God, I hope you don't drop a random encounter on me. My AC is 11. And you're unmounted uh cornered by a bunch of dwarven thugs he's a level 10 cavalier paladin and he would get his ass kicked by a common thug you're so lucky that uh the belt of stone shape is so formal looking and yeah that's some really nice embroidery on there you could actually yeah those those bullies would run off as soon as

i turn into a large earth yeah that would do the trick you'll be all right it'll be fine uh so you have a little bit tougher time finding a church of ioma day even though i ioma day worship is prevalent throughout all of, uh, you know, the inner sea. This is, this is dwarf country, but sure enough, you do find one,

um, just as beautiful, just as beautiful. And, and there are dwarves, uh, milling about dwarven worshipers of I, Oma day,

as well as the, the humans and halflings and gnomes and other races that frequent yirndah so you go inside and um everything is just uh the sword of iomidae obviously is all over the place everything the heraldry is all like battle scenes it's like iomidae crushing a rebellion like leading a charge of warriors into the fray. It's very uplifting. Oh, yeah. Get your juices flowing.

And you see people about. Is there anyone in particular you're looking for? I'm looking for a priest. If there's a priest nearby, could you direct me in that direction? Oh, yes, there's a priest. She's right up there. I'm sure she'll speak with you. She's very nice.

What is her name? Suzette. Good job, LaValley. I knew you didn't have a name planned. Her name is Suzette. She makes a wonderful crepe. It's so French. She makes a wonderful crepe. I'm so French. She's known for her crepes?

She's known for her crepes and her love of Iodine. See ya. He scuttles off. Picks Will's pocket and then scuttles off. We get it. Talking about debt or even hearing a radio ad about debt can make you feel really uncomfortable. But when you find people who actually listen, talking about debt is the best thing you can do for your financial health. Visit BDOdebt.ca to book a free consultation.

All right. So Sir Will would like to make headway to this woman, but as respectfully as possible. Obviously, if she's involved in prayer or talking to someone else he's going to bide his time wait his turn but she's up near the altar kind of uh she's moving things about the altar like um maybe resetting things for a service or uh just gently um cleaning things she's not dressed in armor or anything she's dressed in robes. But she doesn't appear to be unapproachable. Okay. Sir Will will come up and announce himself. Excuse me, Priestess. Yes, hello.

And this dwarven priestess of Iomae priestess Suzette turns around and she's very pretty she's got a you know a rugged look to her she's a little bit taller than you but still not very tall and she's like yes my child

what brings you to the halls of Iomedae I am Sir Willamette Keswick of Highbury in Mendev. I am down this way, a long way from home, and I much needed to find a house of Iomedae to hopefully

recenter myself a bit and to... Well, if you would, I would like to speak with you about my journey here. And I'm afraid it was fraught with peril. And I am guilty of some sin. And I would like to discuss it with you if it's not too much trouble. Oh, that's no trouble at all.

She looks like for a place. It's a little busy in there, this clergy running about. Iomedes, a huge deal. It's kind of a big deal. There's probably not as many churches of Iomedes, so this one's a little busy. So she's like,

please come this way into my chambers. And she takes you to the back, and there's offices and whatnot behind the altar, a little hallway. And she takes you into a very modest little office area, motions to a seat behind her desk. Heraldry of Ioma Day all over the walls, carved into wood. It's pretty beautiful beautiful but you know time to take in the sights um you know this is not a uh a formal confession of course but i'm happy to hear any sins you may have to confess well if you wish it to be more formal i i would certainly understand for what i'm about to say is well i've not taken it lightly and i don't think anyone would who heard it i

well i'm guilty of many things not the least of which is pride of course i left my home in search of glory, and I wanted to defeat the legions of evil in Iomedae's name, and I feel like I may have had best intentions at heart, but truly I wanted renown for myself in some way. I wanted my family to know that I was worthy of their name, to know that I was worthy of their name, and I think that may have set me on a path that led me to place myself before the Code of Iomedae. Well, I had been transferred many times, I don't have to tell you that I am a halfling, and by my size I am not particularly suited to combat. And so I was transferred through several regiments, and I felt that they did not understand what I was capable of. And it was in the town of Trunau that I was given an opportunity to leave from the legions and go with a small band and prove my honor the way i wanted

to where i would be able to and i wanted to return a champion a great champion that was fighting a threat of giants near the borders of the mindin Mountains that were threatening the small folk near Trunau. Well, that was prideful enough, but during my journey, I found that I was wrong about being a champion against giants. I was weak-willed and prone to temptation. When I felt the ease with which evil magic brought relief from pain and revitalization for the next battle and the next after that, I became consumed with it. I lost myself and focused only on completing my mission, on getting my glory, my honor, even if it meant selling my soul. The worst part is that when I finally did fall from grace and felt my connection to

the goddess severed, I shifted blame from myself. I spouted petty excuses about the crimes committed against me when it was I who made the decision to eschew my faith for a brief and fleeting feeling of comfort and pleasure. But I do not wish to do that anymore.

And he pulls out of a satchel the jar of demon's blood that he stole from Della and has been carrying around. And he pulls out of a satchel the jar of demon's blood that he stole from Della and has been carrying around. And he says, this vile component. This vile, vile. This vile, vile was when imbued with the right magic, it would heal our party time and again in our fight against an evil deep behind enemy lines and I

used it of my own free will and I did it more than once without it I don't know that we would have survived and as he says it it's kind of like this realization like if we didn't use it, we wouldn't have survived, you know.

But herein lies its deception. Indeed, it is the blood of evil itself that would make us feel strong and righteous, all while it slowly rotted our hearts. I never thought that I would so swiftly betray Iomedae, that I would so easily take the easy path to victory, and in so doing strengthen the cause of lesser evils. We defeated a great evil, my companions and I, but we set another free, stronger than it was before. And all I can say is that I am sorry. I offer no excuses or justification.

I am guilty of breaking the code of Iomedae, of breaking my oath as a knight of the Order of the Shield, and I put myself at your mercy. The goddess did return my powers in my hour of need, but I feel that I owe the church a penance, and if you will have me as a paladin of Iomedae and as a knight of Highbury, I feel I must confess these sins and know how I will be punished. Oh yes, she reaches across the table and picks up the vial of demon's blood and kind of holds it up to the light. Glimmers red as the sunlight's coming through the stained glass window in her room. And she holds it up and she just places it back down on the table between the two of you.

Seems as if, like many before you and many after you, you lost your way. You speak of seeking glory and honor for your house. You speak of returning home a champion. But these are not things that a follower of Iomedae is interested in. A follower of Iomedae is interested in righting wrongs, in eliminating evil at its root. If glory comes, it is a byproduct.

It should not be the end goal. There are some paladins and clerics out there that think you can go about doing these things by any means necessary. I'm sure you now know that that is not true.

I do not have the power to forgive you your sins, bless you or consecrate you for the evil acts you have committed. Only I,ae can. But it seems as if she already has. If you are to walk in the path of Iomedae, you must follow her tenets. Fight not for yourself, but for her. I know that now.

I swear I will never... I will never give in to such easy temptation again. Even if it means my life. I will fight in her name. And I will not seek personal glory. Then you won't need things like this. She takes it. Pulls out a waste paper basket, and just throws the demon's blood

in a simple little waste basket. And leaves it under her. I'm confiscating this. Yeah, exactly. You know, she's gonna be drinking it later and all her buddies just be pouring it all over her chest. No, it's actually kind of awesome.

It's a big act of ceremony. Yeah, I was throwing it against the wall. It's just trash. It's just simple trash. Your mind gives weight to these things. Do not worry about these superficial things. Focus on finding honor in your heart and walk in Iomedae's shadow.

I cannot tell you how comforting it is to be in this place and to talk to a fellow follower of Iomedae. It has given me a breath of fresh air, and I thank you so much for your time. I will not disturb you any further. No disturbing at all. Please come visit us again next time your journeys take you to

yanderoff i will and uh and he heads out a lightness in his step it feels good to skips out bare feet and fancy free yes bare feet and fancy free Walking on sunshine starts playing in the background. So Pembroke and Ferrazza want to go check out this monument. And like, obviously, you're not going to bring your iPhone to take photos. You just want to kind of take it all in visually. Yeah. All right. So you can find out pretty easily where this is uh faraz is interested in going with you what are you guys talking about during the the walk uh well i pembroke really

wants to talk to her about magic theory uh like the difference between uh theoretical and practical differences between arcane magic and druidic magic. I'm utterly fascinated by this. I never get a chance to speak to someone who's an expert. I can only profess to be an expert in my own experience. Well, let me

just talk about that. I think, what was the, could you remind me what was the name, what were the contents of the note that we found on earth ash's body like who did it implicate uh there were letters like a x and uh i'd have to i don't have my notes directly in front of me but it said like the package arrived uh safely in skier guard yeah and uh can i do a knowledge history for ScareGuard? Or would you advise against doing that?

Yeah, no, you absolutely can. Alright, I'm going to do that. I'm going to roll a 20. 20, okay. Learned man. Very high intelligence. You do faintly remember

reading about a Skirkaling tribe that became a scourge upon northwestern Nidal, western Nirmathas, and southeastern Varisia a long time ago. There were lots of these tribes

at the time, and so Skirgard might have been the home base of the Skirkaling tribe. Using linguistics, very high linguistics, you would think that Skirkaling, Skirkaling, that was probably... Skirgard. They lived in this self-proclaimed town, this tribe called it Skirgard. Stronghold. Yeah. tribe called it skirgong yeah so would this be uh anomalous to uh european vikings is that this is what i'm it'd be very similar like um where the in in galarian the land of the lindorm kings

is basically like that's yeah the akin to sort of all the northse mythology. That's the Scandinavian. Yeah, Scandinavian. This would be like a giant version of that. Oh, it is? Yeah, because when you think of especially where you know there's some frost giant action going on. Yeah, the frost giants are like very specifically drawn from Norse folklore. Right. And they reflect that in their

style of dress. They're like giant Vikings. So maybe these Jarls formed a tribe and called it so would i know if they were actually frost giants that we we believe that right yeah you feel pretty strongly uh based on the information that you have um that it is so yeah i think he just along the way he wants to talk to ferraza just about the as little information as we have to go on to just kind of let her know what he knows about the region and the place and the tribe.

And he's also basically saying hello to everyone in the street that he sees in Dwarvish. Hello, yes. Getting a kick out of speaking Dwarven. Yeah, he's just like, he's so happy to be out in the field again, filling my lungs with air from the great underground. His constitution has actually gone up once since he leveled up. So he's kind of feeling a little stronger.

My dear Pembroke, may I ask you, are you going to ally yourselves with our new friends and head to this dangerous place? Oh, yes, yes, it is my intention. I feel as if I left my post at the university in part hoping to find hope that I could make a difference again in the real world, outside the academic. And this seems to be as good a chance as I'm likely to get. And yet you may give up your life for this mission. Are you prepared for this?

It may surprise you to hear that yes, I am fully prepared to lose my life in such a cause. We need not speak of such things. No, no, of course. Not in this awesome place. Awesome in the traditional sense, not in the California surface speak sense. And we've established,

even though maybe Pembroke hasn't been to a sky citadel before, but he's a traveler. When you met Farazza, didn't you say like, oh, I'm from Syria? Oh, yes. I've been traveling extensively in Syria. Yes. So all these exotic smells and foods that you probably haven't tasted in a long time yeah he's stopping at like a rabbit on a stick vendor yeah i i think he he feels like a young man again

like he's reminded of like being you know out do you have a modium ad in your spellbook for that rabbit on a stick because i have eaten street vendor food in exotic locations. It's all right. That's a cantrip. It's fine. So talk to me about this monument that you want to see that Farazza is interested in seeing as well. So these are these spectacular caverns based sort of on the glittering caves of Aglarons from the Lord of the Rings. They're these natural caverns that the dwarves burst into

dwarven miners quite by accident um some over a thousand years ago and they left them as they were uh i'm making all this up by the way this is right but now since we're official it's cannons but uh so they do their their uh their reverence for natural stone, they left it as it was. And it is a draw for peoples who are interested in such things, many leagues around. Such as us. Such as us. As you approach the area, you've asked about it, and some people give you looks like, why would you want to go there? You know, when you ask dwarves especially, they're like, why would you want to go there?

But okay, yeah, it's down that way, down that way. You guys travel for maybe a couple hours. It just gives you a sense of the scope of this place, just going through tunnels and tunnels. You'll be lucky if you can find your way back. But you get there, and it's pretty heavily guarded. The guards are just standing out front. Pardon me, good sirs in Dwarvish.

Khazad. Baruch Khazad. Khazad Aymanu. Can we get through? What? How far are you interested in going You can only go so far obviously Well I

I've heard tales of the spectacular cabins And we were hoping to see the greater The glittering Yes the glittering caves We were hoping to see the cathedral The cathedral chamber If it's open Well clearly you're not from around

here you can't just go walking through these ruins as you know uh we have to keep them heavily guarded as we've centuries of digging too deep into the earth have opened up a pathway straight to the dark lands oh yes and we've had some problems as of late. Do you not know who you are addressing, my good sir? You are addressing Professor Pembroke the Potent, an expert in these matters. I myself am a scholar of ruins, but only an amateur compared to my friend here. Well, Professor, I'm sorry to say...

That's the word. You go too far in there, your tenure will be over. Well, I have voluntarily abrogated my tenure. You'll be happy to hear. I can assure you we'll be quite careful, and we are more than capable of taking care of ourselves, if that is your concern. He turns to the other guard like,

you guys want to go on? Well, you could go a good couple hundred yards in. You might see a little bit of the glittering, but when you see more guards, that's as far as you're going to go. We can't let you go in any farther. You'll get yourself killed, and then we'll get in trouble. And then I'll have to fill out a ton of paperwork.

Of course. You understand what it's like. If there's a waiver or anything you'd like us to sign, we'd be more than happy to do. That's fine. We just don't get a lot of people asking to go down there, so if you want to check it out, I'm sure you can. We think it's probably fine. You can go in there. Thank you so much. We really do appreciate it. Thank you very much.

I hope it wouldn't be considered gauche to offer you a token of our gratitude, and he pulls out like ten gold pieces and gives it to him. That's quite a token. Oh. That's quite a token. Oh, well, that's not necessary, but that's very, very kind.

Please, I have wanted to see this for many, many years and I deeply appreciate it. My companion and I both deeply appreciate it. We are in your debt. It's very nice of you. I'm in yours. I just, you know, I didn't mean to be rude. It's just that we've had some accidents lately. If you don't mind me asking.

Yes. What kind of accidents? Well, the sort of passageways, you just never know. There's so many of them, and we can't possibly guard every single one of them. Sometimes things just come up. My partner, he's a little bit of a... He believes

in fairy tales and whatnot, but he thinks there's just this growing evil in the world. I don't know. I feel like the world's the same as it was a couple years ago, same as it was yesterday, same as it'll be tomorrow. He thinks there's this growing evil in the world that is drawing the dark power out of the dark lands we've had some stories

lately of children going missing uh you know teenagers not finding their way home we haven't seen any bodies or anything so i'm not prone to believe that there are actually creatures coming up but listen i just follow the rules. Don't go too far in. You'll see how far you can go. The other guards that, no matter how many gold pieces you give, you're not going to get by.

I thank you. We are duly warned, and thank you, and I would advise your friend that it is natural to feel that there is a growing darkness in the world, and I would gently advise him to stay off Twitter for a while, and he'll probably feel better.

I gently advise him. His wife's name is Twitter. I'll tell him. About celibacy. This guy told me to tell you to stay off your wife. What? What did he say about my wife? I had him. Twitter, Oak, and say about my wife? Hey, Adam. Twitter, Oak and Shield is a saint.

Roll for initiative. Twitter, Oak and Shield is a saint. Can she get us verified on Twitter? Is that who we have to talk to to get the checkbook? I can verify if you know how he's on Twitter every night. Oh, God. Oh, man. This guy retweeted your wife.

Do you really? All right. So you do get in. And you walk through and it's beautiful, but it's Do you really? All right. So you do get in. Okay, yeah. And you walk through, and it's beautiful, but it's a little more preserved, like you assumed, than when you walked in and every inch of stone was carved into something. This is preserved a little more naturally,

where you see that it was more for utility. The dwarves were mining these halls, and then some of it they turned into a beautiful portion. You can see the glittering in the distance. But as you go a few hundred yards in, there is this just cold creeping all over you. You can feel the darkness permeating the halls. A sense of dread, perhaps.

Yes. It's palpable. And Farazi, you feel it as well. And you don't know if it's maybe just you get wrapped up in the ghost stories like that guard's partner, or if there really is a sense of dread filling, coming up from below the earth. Well, shall we push forward? I'm feeling a bit uneasy i will not lie yes i i i feel the same if you also feel a bit ill at ease well perhaps um we should um seeing as we are bereft of our uh of our uh companions at the moment perhaps we should commit this beauty to memory and retreat for the moment.

I defer to your intelligence, my friend. Well, at least I saw some of it. And it is beautiful, but that feeling that this is your time off right now. You can enjoy it without wanting to delve deeper. There are other battles to fight. But again, the Darklands just creeping up like those mines you guys saw in Mineral's Valley. Remember when you were walking when you found the Ash Peak name?

You're like, I really want to go down there. I was just thinking about that a couple days ago. Someone I knew just got to that episode. What the fuck? Is the studio haunted? So, yeah, I mean, this is not necessarily the way he wants to spend his vacation. So I think he's,

I think he's seen what he came to see and he's right. He's okay to go back now. The guys retreat back. Baron's still kind of walking around, and maybe he is still looking for information about the Nargrimkins and kind of getting turned around at every point, not getting any information. No one knows who they are.

Farazi, you make it back and you know Lork wanted to... He's got to see a man about a horse. He's got to see a man about a horse. He's got to see a horse about a man. So you wild shape and Lork... I think this time I go camel. You go camel?

That's a good city ride. Yeah. Not too fast. You won't knock anyone over. It's like rocks. It's a rocky ground. Lork is going to put on a golden headdress. And you've got dressing around your wounds and stuff? Yeah.

All right. So, you know, you tell her what you want to do. Where are we going, my friend? I don't remember the way. I just knew he was, I think think a priest of of torag i think but perhaps we can ask around a bit and he just wants to kind of uh ask around about a powerful priest of torag uh i'm sorry a cleric a powerful cleric of torag with uh with healing powers uh and you know it's it's plain to see i mean he's lost his feet this is uh uh it's obvious and he'll explain you know he's looking to get this healed

is there a great healer in the city and you know if you ask people and mention uh that you remember that he was around 20 25 years ago yeah uh as, and that he helped out your brothers, you are directed to someone that they think is probably the guy. They're not 100% sure, but they basically tell you in no uncertain terms that at least he'll treat you, your people. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean?

Yeah. So if he's not the guy, at least he's not going to look down his nose at you and not treat an orc, a half orc. Right. To them, to a lot of people, they're all the same. So you are directed to this place. It's probably about, oh, 40 minutes from where you are. So you guys have some time to chat.

So you can speak. Yeah. Right. Okay. By the way, I look, the reason is that when you're using natural spell, you use like grunts and other sounds to create the incantation.

But with wild speech, you actually just use your language. Where are we going, Lork? All right. Yeah. I would think for us, it is just kind of quizzing lork about true now my godfrey's getting better as the episode is improving it's better with age it's a timeline i think she's like just quizzing lork about like what's the town like well who's in charge like who run like what what what are do far foreigners welcome

there like what all this kind of information. Yeah. And you're getting looks everywhere. I mean, obviously. He's just talking to a horse. We're talking to a horse. A camel. A camel.

I'm sorry, a camel. With two stump legs wrapped up. I thought that guy was talking to a horse. Oh, wait. I saw the horse. I was like, all right. That's fine. That's fine.

One thing, though, Lork, is that you got cleaned up. Yeah. You know, you've been out in the shit for a while. You got cleaned up. You're still emaciated. You didn't smell a bit, my friend. But, you know, you were able to, like, at least make your, like, bandage yourself up and not, you were just wrapping yourself for the past few weeks in, like, dirty bandages.

Yeah. You were lucky you didn't get an infection. Yeah. But now you are a sight, a foot you know half orc on a camel going through dwarf town and the camel is like so what is it what does it what is the municipal structure of the city of trunau well uh jagren runs the militia he's like going through and mostly he's just kind of like dodging dod dodging. Right. And at a certain point, he kind of not cuts her off, but he's just like, you know, he's talking about how the sewer system works. And he's like, I've got I've got to tell you something, Faye Raza, before we before we get to this priest.

And I do hope he can take care of my feet. And it's for a reason. I'd I'd like you to know I didn't tell you for a while because I just I wanted to make sure that we'd get to a place where I could get on my own two feet again and be able to

to right this this wrong and I think it's going to happen I feel that it's going to happen here but before we get there, you should know that... The mission that you're on, the search for... Pudir. The Chosen One.

Aye, the Chosen One. I knew him. What? What? You did not say. I know. But I didn't know him as a Chosen One. I knew him. What? What? You did not say. I know. But I didn't know him as a chosen one. I knew him as a child.

And I was a child at the time as well. It's been 30 years, but... You'll remember when we met. I told you the reason for my quest was... Some redemption. For a great crime I committed in the past. I murdered a boy, and I'm sad to say to you that that boy was Poudir. At least that was the name of the boy I killed. And Farazza just stops walking. I know that it would seem, I mean, if prophecies were meant to be true,

that it wouldn't be possible for some poor destitute straight rat like me to kill someone who has chosen to bring balance between good and evil. He was the blood of the gods. Blood of the gods? What gods? I do not know. And could you kindly dismount, please? And she lowers herself to the ground so he can get off and he's just like sort of like

sitting and she unwild shapes and you're just leaning on your arm yeah and he's just like can I do a sense motive? yeah sure and she's like it doesn't make any sense that like some kid would kill the chosen one

yeah uh 21 yeah i mean it's unopposed it's he's telling the truth not just telling the truth but yeah but his motive is to confess kind of like that's what's coming across what why did you kill a boy well as i said i i was a boy at the time and there's there's no reason for it there's no good excuse it was murder but i was a different a different person back then. He was my enemy. Or at least I saw him as that. And where I grew up. Your enemies. Well it was kill or be killed. And he was. He was peaceful.

He would have been the blood of the gods. Now that I look back on it. But at the time I thought. That he was trying to poison. My boys against me. That he was trying to poison. My boys against me. That he was trying to stop. Our gang from being able to eat. Or get food.

Or have a place to sleep. By conspiring with the other gangs. To share and. And be all. United together. But you have to understand that that was not how things were done. He brought an idea that was new

and it was wrong. And I killed him for it. I do not understand. The prophecy said that the Chosen One would not know his power. But to be murdered. And she's kind of like... I think she's more like just in such disbelief more than anything else.

I think she's also kind of like she's keeping her distance from you, but she's like... Vairasa, I... I didn't think until I met you and really until this very moment... That maybe... He could have stopped it. And he didn't. I knew that he had given over to the crime. And that he had forgiven me at the time. But I think that it's possible this was part of his path.

That you and I were part of it. I'm realizing it as I say it now because a great oracle in true now Catresra told me to seek the scone qua he said they knew about the dead and undeath

he said it might alleviate a curse that I had been living under a curse that very had been living under. A curse that very well may have come from killing such a well-meaning lad. Well, I thought it might have just been for killing somebody good, good-hearted. Somebody like Galabras. Well, you don't know Galabras, but you will one day.

Well, maybe there was much more to it than that. And if this place, the Skoan Kwa, if they can connect to the world of the dead, then maybe you can connect with Pudir. There.

And maybe that's what he wants you to do. Sounds ridiculous ridiculous I am gravely disheartened to hear this my friend but you have suffered much for your crime and I will tell you I do not think I can trust you the same as I did before but I will I believe I do not think I can trust you the same as I did before. But I will, and I believe our only path forward is to go on this quest that you speak of.

We will do this, but I fear the world is in a much graver position than it was before I knew this. It's a dark time everywhere, I feel. And if what you say is true, I fear for the lives of all of the people of this continent. Lork gets like

uncomfortable. He's like, I really fucked up. I really fucked up. Did I really cause the end of the world? I cursed Avastan? Oh man. He's going to say,

if you wouldn't mind getting me to this church on time. Camel up. If I could get the, if I can, if this priest is still alive and I can get my feet,

we will go on this quest and hopefully stop the great dangers from settling in this continent. So yeah, and Farazza was just very curtly, not curtly, but like very, she's incredibly sad. Thinking about a million different things. She's concerned the whole world is now in danger.

But she wild shapes back into a camel and let's lark mounter but not in the dirty way um but as they're walking down the street i think i never thought from you matthew we were all quiet i was trying to head it off look he's not even on his mic he's leaning back let it go i never even thought that i was thinking about the humps you know matthew you always play a woman who's disappointed with us and today we play men disappointed in you you camel up throw them on your back and make your way to this and and as you as if you take a close look or if the dwarves on the streets of yanderhoff took a close look they would see the camel is crying oh oh this is it's probably just the wind fucks right in the moment people are like a camel's tears gonna rain tomorrow we're underground

outside it rained here in centuries but they always said when you see a camel's tears when the rain rises up from the earth so you make your way to where they told you uh this guy would be someone who if he's not your guy at least will treat uh half orcs and orcs maybe not orcs uh you go down this modest street and see a like a shack um in the distance oh really see like a shack in the distance. Oh, really? It's a shack. Yeah. Nothing fancy.

And there is a symbol of Torag on the door that looks like it was hand carved by someone that isn't an artisan. Maybe the priest himself did it or herself. Very unassuming. Okay. But if it's this is what you were told this is what it was going to look like so you come up to the hut and

Faraz I'd I'd like you to do this with me in your your natural form Faraz will de-wild shape and she'll cast ant hall on herself so she can kind of carry you more easily

oh perfect baby carry not baby carry you knock on the door who's there at this hour I'm sorry to disturb you but I'm afraid I've been injured and I need your services. Injured? I didn't hear of any battles going on in the streets today.

What kind of injury have you got? I've lost my feet. They've been amputated. Ah. tainted ah door opens and this rather stout obviously small dwarven man completely bald with long white mutton chops not even a beard no mustache that like hang down uh to his uh you know right above his pectoral muscles um and he's played by robert loja the late great robert loja oh man they say you lost your feet you didn't say you were a green skin what's your name there soldier my name is lork iron tusk i uh i i from, oh, decades ago I came here with the Black Arrows. You treated some friends of mine.

But it's been decades. I wouldn't suppose you'd remember me. Ah, the Black Arrows. Of course I remember the Black Arrows. Iron Tusk, you say, huh? Not your birth name, I take it? Ah, no, it was a name they gave me in the, in the Arrows. Yeah.

You don't know your birth name, probably. None of you do. None of you do. Well, it's the worst case of athlete's foot I've ever seen. I'm sure you understand that this thing you're interested in having me attempt to do is rather pricey. Aye, we know. It happened while I was taken prisoner by giants. It was giants that done it to me,

and, well, they got what they had coming to them, and they left a hoard of treasure behind. So I got the gold to pay for it. Giants, you say? And he walks into the light, and now you see that his entire right eye is missing,

and there's a huge gash leading from, like, above his forehead all the way down to his chin, and the eye is missing. Oh. The name's Nezzelin Splintershield. A soldier name, like yours.

Of course, my fighting days are long over. If you've got the gold, come on in, hop up on the table. I'm sorry, m'lady, though. This process, you'll have to go about it alone. Then Braza looks to Lork oh it's it's all right so she kind of can she put him on the table sure sure i can't lift him not with my back uh so fraza will put him on the table and then she'll i think fraza also wants to go off and like think about things. Sure. Sure, she might just leave. Process. Process this knowledge. Consider, uh, yeah.

What to do. As she's walking out, Feyraza, thank you for bringing me here. And I'm, and I'm sorry. If what you say is true, my friend, as I have mentioned before, it is not for you to be

sorry. It is the world and she leaves he ushers you in you're up on the table already he shuts the door now before I collect the money I have to be up front with you I must tell you this type of magic there are no

guarantees I don't charge extra for green skins, though. You can be sure of that. You may not find the same courtesy with other dwarves in town. That being said, if the gods do see fit to restore your limbs, then you can dance right out of here for all I care. But the gods' will is their own. I care.

But the gods' will is their own. What I'm saying is, if the divine powers do not see fit to grant you your wish, there are no refunds. Still interested? All right. Aye. I am.

He starts unwrapping the bandages. He's a little rough. Kind of hurts a little bit. But, you know, he's just doing the best he can. May I ask as he's doing it? May I ask where you served? Well, I served all over. I wasn't a great warrior, but I held my own.

I fought with dwarves. I was cocky. I was headstrong. That was a time I thought I could take on a whole giant army by myself, and my God, looks like you did as well. How did you say you lost your feet again?

We tried to take on a whole giant army. Only three of four of us. And, uh, sorry, one we lost. They captured the rest and, uh, well, as a lesson to everyone else not to try to escape,

they removed my feet. And, uh, it, I don't have to tell you, it was bloody painful. And it has been for a long time since. Couldn't even give you the honor of a clean cut. Looks like they pulverized these things. I...

I've been, uh... Been living with it every day, but... My... My companions came back for me and... Pulled me out of there. So I owe them my life. And it's not worth much if I don't have a pair of feet to help them out. So that's why I'm here.

If I can get well again, then I can continue the fight and hopefully give as much as they've given to me. Ah, yes, the fighting, the fighting. It'll be the death of us all. I could tell right away this is the work of a savage. A giant, of course. A giant, yes, yes. That's what giants do.

They take things. They take things from the small folk. They took my whole regiment. The last day I ever fought. Watched them all die right around me. Friends, sisters, brothers. All dead.

By a trap sprung by these monsters. You were a soldier, you know what it's like. Aye, the same thing happened to me. When I was in the arrows, I lost an entire platoon. To a man they were killed, and I... Somehow I survived and crawled my way back.

A fire giant it was. And I... I've hated him ever since. A fire giant was a frost giant that did me in. I all died right in front of me, and I was left face to face with one of these behemoths bearing down on me with a great axe the size of you. Largest creature I've ever seen. Must have been 20 feet tall if he was a yard.

I held my own as best I could, but those frost giants, fire giants, you know they are fierce martial opponents. They aren't lumbering hill giants or feeble-minded inbred ogres. Were it not for my shield, he would have carved off half my face in one swoop. As it was, the shield exploded and I lost my eye instead. Is that where you got the name Splinter Shield? Aye, Iron Dusk, it was. But it was also Torag's will that kept me alive. Because that damn thing took me for dead and walked off.

And I never did fight again. I returned home. Broken. Like you. Barely any will to live. But yet again. Torag came to my rescue. I pledged my life to his service.

All the while he's like grabbing things around and pouring ointments on you and stuff. And I've worked in his name ever since. I can't tell you how many times I've restored a man's limbs or sight or cure them of some deadly disease or poison. I've made so many physically broken people whole again. In all my years of prayer, though, I could never understand why Toreg wouldn't answer my prayer and give me back my eye. Of course, as I've gotten older,

my eye of course as I've gotten older I've realized that he gave me more than a mere eye ever could fix for I see better than any creature I've ever met I see by your sword there that you're a father of Gorim are ya

are ya well as I said I can't guarantee anything. I work for Torag. I don't speak for Gorom. These divine powers, they work in strange ways. But if Gorom and Torag see fit to answer your prayer and give you back your feet, remember this, Lork the Iron Tusk. It takes

more than having two feet or two arms or two eyes to walk and to fight and to see in this world. Here. Drink this. He hands you something and just kind of pours it into your mouth and it is strong. Stronger than anything Baron's into your mouth. And it is strong.

Stronger than anything Baron's ever given you. Bathtub gin. Bite down on this. He gives you like a dirty wooden spoon. I don't know if this is going to work. But if it does, it's going to hurt. Does Farazza wait around for him? I think she's sitting outside the hut.

I think she's literally just sitting on the ground thinking, praying, trying to rethink through all the conversations she ever had about the Chosen One in her head. But yeah, she's sitting outside. And you just hear a blood-curdling scream. Ugh.

Lork at the top of his lungs. Meanwhile, back at the Gilded Hammer, imagine Baron Pembroke and Sir Will, or maybe enjoying a pint. I don't know, is Pembroke a teetotaler? Does he enjoy a pint? No, no, no, I'll enjoy it. Drink from time to time. A pint of ale every once in a while.

Baron, you get to have some of your old drinks. I mean, great ales from all around the world. Yeah, I'm basically turning into real-life Troy at this point. Right, right. Just walking through a brewery like, oh, I love this smell. Oh, God, the beer is... I can't believe it.

The beer is fantastic. Troogs. Sir Will, I mean, smell oh god the beer is fantastic drugs sir will i mean uh you probably are you are you a drinker will you uh take one from time to time yeah yeah he's he's a drinker he can't hold much certainly not these dwarven ales yeah no so he just he has a little bit but i mean he used to spend his drinking time boasting about him and his units successes on the battlefield and uh but now he's rethinking it a little bit he's just doing more listening and uh and and but smiling and laughing and having uh a weight has been lifted uh but he's not he's not thinking that he did anything great at this point yeah i mean he had a talk with the priestess and he walked out of there feeling like okay

i think i'm in good shape yeah it was hard to say baron kind of had the same thing in his uh in his dialogue with the uh the priest well the kindly priest i i do think that uh being able to be uh vulnerable in front of else, which he really hasn't felt comfortable doing with a group of people he's kind of been fighting with and has wanted to have some semblance of leadership with, was a relief in and of itself. He just hasn't been able to be weak in that way in any way. I mean, the general thing that both Sir will and baron and maybe they're talking about it maybe they're keeping themselves learned it's like you got to figure it out for yourself no one's going to tell you how to walk in torag in iomide's footsteps and pembroke had a chance to check off another one of things on his bucket list but also got this sobering reminder of the evil

growing in the world. And as you sit there having drinks and celebrating for a moment, something Baron must be taken back to is being back at the pub. Killing grounds. Killing grounds right before you guys set out for Minderhall's Valley. So there's got to be that, I feel like I've done this before and I know how that ended. But you look up in the distance, you see Farazza

walk into the room and she has a very strange look on her face like she's seen a ghost and behind her walks in Sergeant Lork. What?

What? Holy moly! And we'll see you next time. Oh! Woo! Woo! As I live and breathe. As I live and breathe.

Is it Lork Iron? Lieutenant Dan, you got your legs back. You got legs. You got your legs back. You got your legs back. You got your legs back. production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission.