The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 154 - Cloudy with a Chance of Mess Hall

Episode Date: May 8, 2018

As a mammoth stampede causes turmoil throughout the camp, the heroes use the distraction to attempt to strike another critical blow. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Available for a limited time only at participating locations. This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. Oh my God! While anarchy reigns. And you just see the mammoths are still running about. They're trying to corral this. There's chaos happening everywhere. Giants are running back and forth, screaming.

The barn is like, now the embers have started to come down. I mean, it corral. There's chaos happening everywhere. Giants are running back and forth screaming. The barn is like, now the embers have started to come down. I mean, it is a real scene. Yeah, man. Baron encounters an unidentified flying object. If it's not the wind, it is the wing of this creature itself touching you on your head.

It's got to be right above you. Oh my god. But his friends find themselves in a situation of their own natural 20 god damn it we'll splitting the party look we gotta wait for pembroke i think he's on his way too but he took his own way all right we don't have much time bring the campaign to a tragic end. Natural one. Oh, no! Oh, yeah! Oh, no. Yeah, this is a lot. Damn it. Crits and fumbles left and right.

World of Confirmed. Hummus and chips. The adventure continues now. Hey everybody, it's me, your friendly neighborhood Skidmar. I'm sorry, I'm watching Spider-Man Homecoming in the background while I do this. Welcome to the latest episode of the Glass Cannon Podcast. We really hope that you're enjoying Androids and Aliens, our new Starfinder podcast. Keep those reviews coming, they are helping us so much. I've been on the leaderboard since we launched, and it's been awesome.

We've got two more weeks of our Patreon-exclusive Ruins of Aslan Raiders of the Lost Continent podcast left before we go on another little mini break. So please enjoy those. Those are available to our $5 tier and up Patreon donors. And PaizoCon is just a few weeks away. Those are available to our $5 tier and up Patreon donors. And PaizoCon is just a few weeks away. I hope everyone who is able to come can show up. Be sure to head over to paizo.com to sign up for our events. We're doing another GCP Live.

We're going to be finishing the Pathfinder Playtest Crypt of the Everflame game that we started with Jason Bullman and Eric Mona. And we're going to be doing a little seminar called Adventure Prep 101. That's going to be Joe, Troy, and me. And plus, you know, we're going to have our own GCP room for GCP Nation to game in all weekend. And we're going to do some kind of mini events in there. Got some fun surprises set up for that. And we're all hanging out in a brewery and going bowling Sunday night. And you can come join us for that,

even if you're not going to PaizoCon, if you're just in the area. Plus, I'd love for you guys to check out my new podcast, Pages to Pictures, that I'm doing with my friends Andy Schmidt, former Marvel editor, and James Janowski, a screenwriter. We're doing analyses of movies that were adapted from other mediums. We're talking about Marvel movies. We just did Black Panther. We did a really fun talk about Infinity

War, Marvel Infinity War. Please go check that out download uh rate subscribe all that stuff for that that would be awesome hope you enjoy listening to it as much as i've uh enjoyed recording it uh but that's enough of that why don't we get to the newest episode the gloss cannon podcast you know what its title is it's's Cloudy with a Chance of Mess Hall. You approached Skiergard pretty cautiously, all things considered. And rightfully so. Everything you've heard about this place was giant training camp. We should probably do some recon.

And recon, you did. Lork was up in a tree for at least four episodes straight. Am I remembering that incorrectly? I feel like it was four episodes of Lork in a tree. That's what it felt like. But, I mean, it was a lot of, like, let's see what's going on. Let's try to figure this out. And there were whole portions of the camp you didn't even do any recon on.

You were mainly focused on the camps. Let's find out what's going on at the camps. Let's find out what's going on at the watchtowers. What are those buildings? I mean, there's still one building in the lower camps. You have no idea what's recon on you. We're mainly focused on the camps. Let's find out what's going on at the camps. Let's find out what's going on at the watchtowers. What are those buildings? I mean, there's still one building in the lower camps. You have no idea what's going on there. You know, but slowly but surely, over the past few episodes,

you've been a little more destructive. You blew up a silo. You smeared shit on a statue you uh you murdered straight up murdered uh you know giants giant horse people uh all sorts of things druids druids we poisoned all the beer he's a witch i don't know why i keep saying we orphaned a fox you orphaned a fox poor mer. We also saved a couple slaves. Yeah, what's up? Two. Faye Raza! Two out of 50 ain't a bad start.

Six died during that trip to the Forge of Bathell. All right. And ten were trampled by mammoths. One of the mammoths heads straight for the slave. Starts deliberately stomping on slaves. Troy's like, oh, don't mind. I guess he rolled a sad face on that one. Oh, man. But yeah, this last episode ended with you,

with Lork sneaking up, opening up the gates to the mammoth pen, and V-Razza just going full pyro on those barns, and the mammoths just stream out, causing disarray among the upper camp. And let's be honest, all of Skirgard at large. But now you're in a very unique position because you can just call it a day. You can just call it a day if you want. And maybe you should.

Pembroke is out of his teleport spells. Feyraza's burned. Out of invisibility, too, I think. You definitely used two. I am out of invisibility also. Feyraza burned a lot of spells during her solo mission to the mines. It wasn't supposed to be a rescue mission, to be fair. You never know what's going to happen in Pathfinder.

But now you've got a great opportunity maybe to do something i was telling joe as we were walking uh back from the the bathroom i was like uh you guys went to the bathroom together we did yeah we had to check just like a couple of lady friends i want to make sure my makeup wasn't running how else do you expect them to do cocaine that effectively gotta stay on for these late apps. They only have so much time. It's almost become easier to prep Giant Slayer at this point

because all I'm doing is reacting. I try to just know it as much as possible and then react to what you're going to do because I just have no idea. And this is another instance. I wanted all week to just email you like, so what are you guys thinking about doing? Just so I could do a little homework.

But I'm like, no, I want to be able to shuck and jive in the same way that you guys are doing that. Matthew went to those mines last week. You didn't think you'd be in the situation that you were in having to save a father and his son. And you came up with a cool solution. I want to be in that. I want to have that same raw

energy that you have. So, Lork comes over, opens up the gates. The mammoths are already pissed. Maybe they smell Cap Benatar. Maybe they smell Lork's stinky ass. Maybe they smell Feyraza. She's no longer odorless. But you open up the gates, Lork, and then

Feyraza goes full pyro on the barn. The mammoths freak out and stampede out into the upper camp, causing a ruckus throughout all of Skirgard. Now Pembroke and Baron see an opportunity. They see a barn on fire and just hear, oh, my God, in the distance. Is that what Frost Giant sounded like when rattled? Giant version of that. In the distance. Is that what Frost giant shot like when rattled? In giant. Giant version of that. So Baron,

like the Wicked Witch of the West, flies into the air on his broom and decides to go up and swooping down. I say roll one stealth check. Do you remember what you rolled on that stealth check? A nine on the die.

22 overall. 22. We'll go with a nine. This is Troy's house house rule he doesn't modify roles yeah 22 overall i mean when i say right above you you if it's not the wind it is the wing of this creature itself touching you on your head. It's got to be right above you. A frost drake.

Oh my god. Oh no. I rolled perception against your stealth. Uh-huh. At the end of last week's episode. Yeah. And I rolled. Uh-huh. For that frost drake yes a natural one

the frost drake flies right over your head and goes oh my god down into the camp towards the northern portion of the camp oh my god really and you swoop down get the hell portion of the camp. Oh my god. Really? And you swoop down, get the hell out of there, and end up at the rendezvous point with Lork. I thought I was dead all week long. I thought I was going to see your frozen carcass just falling out of the sky.

You know, a barren popsicle. I just see this frost-trake landing and like a de-icing crew come out like for United Airlines and start spraying its wings so it can fly. Oh, boy. I mean, inches from your head. How it didn't see you is amazing. You must have just swooped at the right time.

If you had waited a second later, it might have seen you. It flies over your head and goes into the camp somewhere. Wow. But now you're at the rendezvous point with Lark broom in hand all right what's next i'm looking around and seeing if uh pembroke has joined he told me that he could fly beforehand so i'm just kind of uh so we're at the burnout husk of the silo we're crouched at the side like of a pillar that remains it is just enough space to conceal look and i standing next to each other and i see this dumb looking bird flying up

there oh it's matthew okay all right and ferrazzo stands up behind you and was like what no hello my friend no she's still a bird okay i was about to say i need to re-up my autobahn society subscription uh and i'm just looking for pembroke and i say lork we gotta wait for pembroke i think he's on his way too but he took his own way. All right. We don't have much time, though. Pems, what do you do? Okay. Well, I was actually going to wait and see if I was needed.

Oh, that's fine. But, yeah. So Pembroke is waiting to see if there's trouble because he doesn't want to give anything away because he can't be invisible anymore. Sure. He's not healthy. So he's just going to wait and see if there's trouble. He's going to fly over it, but otherwise he's going to be fine. How convenient is he that he got to find out about that frost rake before he decided not to fly

certainly has well I imagine like maybe he was just watching like I'm going to see how Baron does and maybe you see oh shit maybe I'll hold off a second I just want to see if it spotted him if it went after him then I would have flown over there got it right yeah you see I mean it's

way far away you don't have dark vision so you're looking and you just see something in the distance, but it looks like Baron got away scot-free. Okay. All right. So we wait a little bit of time. Yeah. And then Lork's like, we've got no time, Baron.

We have to go. All right. It's time. It's time to break into that mess hall. Let's go. Red team, go. Oh, and so right now I'm going to spend a standard action just for, because I'm glad this didn't come up in combat.

standard action just for because i'm glad this didn't come up in combat um i wanted to say that unless i say otherwise in between combats or when this is in use i'm using my opportunity to change my teamwork feat to be able to use lork stealth check if it's higher than mine ah but if i you know if we go a long time in between that my normal teamwork feat that's active for combat is target of opportunity where i get to fire if someone else hits a ranged attack within 30 feet. Don't you have to change it as a standard action? Yeah, I'm just saying that if we role play for a whole episode, I'm not going to just leave it as the take his stealth role teamwork feat. I'm going to switch it back to target of opportunity just that way so we don't get into a fight later. So you use a standard action for that, and then it just stays on all the time?

Yeah, you're just swapping it out. Okay. All right. Stealth synergy. Into a fight later So you use a standard action for that And then it just stays on all the time Yeah You're just swapping it out Okay Alright Stealth synergy Okay Alright so you guys So we're gonna sneak up

While this madness is going on We're gonna look for openings Where nobody's looking our way And go from the burnt out silo Kind of under that watchtower That's between the silo And the mess hall To the back of the mess hall,

the mountain falls off right behind us. Yeah. I mean, there's nothing back there unless there's a giant, like, taking a piss. Yeah. You get bull rushed off there. See ya. See ya. That's it.

Yeah. I mean, that is a sheer drop down the mountain. Yeah. So, I think, yeah, we're going to sneak up behind and try to get into, try to see if there's a back entrance into the mess hall. All right. Roll a stealth check. By the dumpsters.

By the dumpsters. What did you roll? Natural 18. Beautiful. I rolled a 12. There you go, buddy. So I got a 31. Get back there with ease.

27 for the turn. Oh, so Feyraz is with you as well. Yeah. Feyraz is flying along. Eyes in the sky, baby. News chopper five. Little Bay Roz is flying along. Eyes in the sky, baby. She's the noose chopper five. Little tiny bird is hopping behind her. By the way, I just read the new Book of Dust, Volume 1, the new Philip Pullman.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. There is an arctic tern in it. Oh, nice. Oh, wow. He's one of the demons. He's one of the demons. It's pronounced demons. The demons.

Yeah. Demon. It is demon? Demon. Okay. Nerd. We should kick his ass after this episode. Enjoy your book, nerd.

Nerd! Nerd! Were it not for the pitched roof and stone fireplace, this ramshackle looking single story wooden building could be considered a shack. Although one of immense size. You

come around to the back. You've seen the front. You've seen there's a window that they line up in front of to get their food. You've seen that. Well, there was a door in the back as well, exiting to the dumpsters. Flanked

by two smaller windows with the shutters drawn. You know, there's a porch up front. That's where they line up to get to those windows. There are two windows and a door in the back. Feyraza

as a bird. Baron and Lork. Baron as a dwarf. Baron as a dwarf. Just what I'm most comfortable as. I don't know. You are... It is kind of funny, though, because you could say Lork as an elf today. Yeah, today.

That's true. I just realized they're going to be so confused. If they're looking for Baron with a Texan hat, he's not wearing that helmet. They're not going to recognize him. Oh, yeah. Are you wearing that Frost Giant helmet? I can put my hat over it. Come on. All right.

That's true. Flavor hat. Sure. Flavor hat. It's a mint berry blue, I believe is the color. Flavor hat like Flavor Drake's. All right. Lork is going to go Lork is gonna go up to

The window and just see If there's any sort of Slit in the shutters that He can see through if not He's gonna move to the Door look at the shutters No okay it's sealed Decent construction

Decent construction All right He'll go to the door Man this is gonna be Tough he's gonna think There's madness in there So there's no point in Listening at the door

There's also a raging Fire and screaming frost giants and a stampede all around us. It's like, shh, everybody quiet. And before you open the door, Baron is going to take out one of his potions or oil of silence. So smart. For an hour worth of total silence from the gun. Excellent. And that way, if it's locked and we need to do a quick little utility shot, boom, bam, the door open.

Oh, that's great, too. Yeah. All right, Lork's going to say, Baron, I'll try to get this door open quietly, and then we'll get in there, and you can do your business with the alchemical stuff. He will try to see if the door is locked quietly. All right, roll a stealth check.

23. What was the dial one natural one all i care about is the 23 it is unlocked okay and you are able to open all right he slides it open and i immediately do a perception check inside for giants immediately nearby the door. 35. We got some intel on this from Ringo, right? Georgia Ringo. Paul, one of the Beatles. I think it was Ringo. Ringo. Yoko.

You open the door. Look into the room. And inside this mess hall is a pretty simple affair. It's one large single room. There's a few preparation tables, simple cooking implements, and two immense cauldrons resting in a fireplace. You also see three creatures scurrying about the room.

We got intel on this from Ringo, I think, right? Looks like they're trying to bar. Three large creatures. Bar the front door. Really? So that no one can get in. Good. They're locked in here with us.

Cage match. Four arms. Right. Cage match. Four arms. Right. Two alike. Four arms, two alike. You see two identical female hill giants and a creature with four arms. What? A giant with four arms Like directing them

Pointing at what they're supposed to do Wearing a greasy apron Is it Goro from Mortal Kombat? As you open the door The Forearmed creature And one of the identical hill giants Is very busy with the door

But the other one Sees you Oh no Roll for initiative Oh no, but the other one sees you. Oh, no. Roll for initiative. Oh, no. It was the natural one, Grant. By the way, did you take that natural one for your stealth?

Buddy. Actually, it's both of you. Oh, I'm an idiot. I am a rich fool. What happened? I'm so glad we have that recorded. Oh, damn. Cut the mic. Get that drop. Get that drop. Cut my mic. Cut my mic. I was just getting ready. I am a rich fool What happened? I'm so glad we have that recorded Oh damn wait Cut the mic Get that drop

Get that drop Cut my mic I was just getting ready I'm such a fucking idiot I was just getting ready To show you guys The picture Of the

Forearmed creature And I look at it And it only has Three arms Oh We got Ringo gave you Some bad intel

Ringo gave you Some bad intel I should have been Three arms It's a Two alive It's a beetle What do you want from it

He did the best he could Yes it only has three arms Man that would have been great If I got that right But hopefully I was super super nervous And now I'm like Three arms

Piece of cake Well this is the picture Of the creature Oh Nervous again So nervous again He's part of the kitchen staff Piece of cake Well this is the picture Of the creature Oh Oh Nervous again So nervous again He's part of the kitchen staff

You saw his loincloth maybe And thought it was His fourth arm He's got two arms Looks like a mace In one hand And one arm Coming out of the side

Of his body I think when I saw that I just said Oh yeah Four armed creature Nope Three arms Yeah

Can I ask Why is this guy In the kitchen staff Yeah yeah Surely he could be more valuable elsewhere. He looks like he should have a different job. Maybe he's a scary looking creature. He's being punished or something.

Evil. Well, you're about to find out more about him as you, I'm assuming, die. Seriously. He's going to tell us his life story as he kills us? Giant number one, what would you do with me on a first date? Now, here's the pickle. What happens with Pembroke? Pembroke is looking for signs of trouble.

Well, this is what I was going to bring up on my initiative. Yes. All right. So let's go through initiative. Let me start with Feyraza. 22. Solid. Barrett.

25. 25. Sure. Even more solid. Lorne. 26. 25. Even more solid. Lorch. 26. Oh, yeah. Daddy's got a brand new Lorch.

And now Pembroke. What's your initiative? 12. 12. Okay. Let's talk. You want to wait until it's your turn? Yeah, let's just wait until it's your turn.

All right, let's do that. Let's do that. It's round one. Now, they saw you, but nobody gets the jump. They're busy doing other things, and you just happen to open the door, and they turned and saw you. And she's like, ah! Yeah. Round one, Lork.

All right. Lork, ready for this, prepared for this danger, is going to just eye up that first hill giant that saw him. And he's going to go full bore, deadly aim, rapid shot. Wow. And just try to just take this thing out. It's perfect. Even though you're outside, it's a double, you know, it's a 10-foot wide door. So you have a totally wide open shot against this woman's flat-footed AC. He pulls an arrow out of his quiver,

knocks it, and fires. That's gotta be, gotta be a hit. 30, 30 to hit. Yep, 30 will hit. And he does 23 points of damage. Wow. I'm telling you. Fires off a second shot, and that's a 26 to hit. 26 will hit as well.

And he does 23 points of damage. Nice. And then he's going to take one more shot here and that's probably a miss. Oh wait, 18. It's a hill giant. 18 is a miss. So he misses on the third. It's probably like 19. I'm guessing it's like 19. Yeah, he's going to miss on the third

and then he is going to say, cat, attack. And he is actually going to, oh oh wait is the door 10 feet wide so he's going to slide over to the side to give a clear shot to Baron right behind him and send cat in after the hill giant all right so you're just going to send cat in will cat do that without

you pushing her yeah I think so it's attacking a biological creature it's scary but I think she'll do it was that a straight line? No, she had to move around. All right, so you can make one attack. Right, but you also get an attack of opportunity. Oh, let me check their reach here.

I sure do. All right, so she swings down with a meat cleaver. Oh, no. On Cat Benatar. She's cooking. Natural 20. Oh, no! Times three crit with a cle 20. Oh, no! Times three crit with a cleaver.

Oh, shit, man. We're having cat tonight. All right, so I'm going to have to... Meat's back on the menu, boys. I couldn't find neon green, so I grabbed this heavy gold-plated dye that I got from a new friend I met in North Carolina at the GCP Mid-Atlantic meetup. So I just grabbed that. First time I rolled it on air, Natty20. Oh, man.

Thanks a lot. Yeah. Thanks. Thanks a lot. Thanks for the gift. Appreciate it. This is bad news. So what do you want to try and do?

I am going to enact Bolster Companion. Ooh. And I will have the damage to her. All right. So I don't, I mean, it might just, maybe just knock her unconscious. I mean, best case scenario. So it's not a named creature is what you're telling me. You know what?

It is a, well, yeah, it is a named creature. I thought you were going to roll to confirm the crit. Yeah, I'm going to roll to confirm the crit. It is a named creature. Oh, oh, oh, so fan critical. And I rolled, oh, actually, this may not confirm. This may not confirm a 16 to confirm. No, it doesn't confirm. All right, so it's non-confirming. Beautiful, oh, actually, this may not confirm. This may not confirm a 16 to confirm. No, it doesn't confirm.

All right, so it's non-confirming. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. All right, so just normal damage. But exploding dice. Exploding dice, that's right. But half damage on the gun. Exploding half. All right, let's see.

All right, no exploding. It's going to be a total of 13 points of damage. Without having it. Yeah, without having it. Okay, so six. Wow, that could have been so much more brutal. That could have been a lot damage. Without having it. No, yeah, without having it. Okay, so six. Wow, that could have been so much more brutal. That could have been a lot worse. A lot worse.

For example, confirmed crit would have been 66 plus 30 damage. Oh, man. Oh, my God. That could have been pretty bad. But now Cat gets her bite. Yes, all right. So Cat is going to... Cat will take that bite real quick.

And that is a 23 to hit. 23 is going to hit. And she does six points of damage. Six points of damage. A fair little six. A little trade-off. A little trade-off. And she got hit with that cleaver and took a chunk out of her side.

But it could have been a lot worse. Baron. Baron's going to take a five-foot step forward and use a standard action. Now, this is the fascinating thing. Here we go. About the teamwork changes. I'll decide if it's fascinating or not. He's going to not take a shot this round because he's out of range and because he wants to be able to take full opportunity against all three of these giants.

Be able to take shots against them when Lork lands them with target of opportunity. Okay. His other teamwork feat. Because right now we have stealth synergy enacted from when we approach. Right. We just discussed this. So that's my turn. That's it.

Oh, shit. Oh, man. Wait, what did you do again? It feels like you didn't do anything. I move forward. Yep. I spent a standard action to change my teamwork feat from stealth synergy to target of opportunity. So that way I get four shots around instead of three.

I heard it both times. It just seems like you didn't do anything. Faye Raza. So, talk to me about these cauldrons. Okay. What do you want to know? So, they're just big, what, metal cauldrons? Big, yeah, big metal cauldrons.

You've seen these before. And, you know, they've got flames licking beneath them. This is where they cook all of the food. So, you see, this is probably where they put humans. So here's my thought. I'm going to cast Ice Spears. Okay. Oh, God, I love that new spell.

Ice Spears is good. It doesn't have to come out of an actual ground. It's magical. It can just come out of anything, like come out of the wood floor. It just says out of the ground. Okay. But you get bonuses if the floor is snowy or icy. Okay, yeah, this is just wood But it's magic

Ice comes out of the ground Ice comes out of the ground Okay What I would like to do But you tell me if this is Based on what I'm seeing If I would think this is feasible Yeah

You send one underneath the cauldron To knock the cauldron over And spill fire and flaming liquid onto the ground Oh Okay, that would be boiling liquid For sure That would definitely do damage If you're able to knock it over onto the ground oh okay that would be boiling liquid uh for sure that would do that would definitely do damage if you're able to knock it over so the spear so but like based on what i'm

looking at does it look like a giant spear could knock it over um or yeah what's the cmd of or cmb of it again it doesn't roll right it just does damage doesn't it just does damage right but doesn't have a cmb to try and basically it's trying to trip the cauldron okay yeah yeah so it's a my caster level plus my intelligence listener charisma modifier yeah that's my CMB is Mike would be nine plus would be 13 plus my role right yeah you would think as long unless you roll terribly

that if you put two spears on one side of the cauldron, it could tip over and hit this other female hill giant if it would boiling water. Oh, so I'm going to need two spears to do it. Yeah. Well, didn't you have two spears last time? Well, yeah. Well, the cauldron is 10 feet.

So yeah, you'd have two on the same side. I was going to send one spear up under the cauldron to tip it and then another one onto one of the giants. But if you tell me it needs two spears, I can think about that too. Uh, well, it's just going to make it harder. You're going to have to roll higher. Well, here's my argument. The two spears thing, the one spear thing is not going to

really guarantee where it's going to go. The two spears guarantee it goes right at the hill giant and stays right at your feet because you're picking up one side and throwing it that way. I'll deal with the cauldron later. Okay. I'm just going to send two spears against the three-armed guy. Against the three-armed guy. Oh, man.

If we trip this dude. Trip him. Trip him. All right. Now, he's two size categories larger. Does that make any difference? No. Okay.

All right. So, go ahead. He puts his third on down and braces it off. You get a reflex save. DC 17. DC 17. Roll two of them for two spears. Don't you tell me what to do.

All right. DC 17. He makes the first one And 16 fails the second one Okay so first spear This is 2D6 Piercing 2D6 cold I'll do the blue ones as cold

Four cold Seven piercing so 11 total You take half And then here's the one you failed thank you for please keep telling me all of the different numbers because it helps uh okay so 12 piercing and six cold that's great full of that one okay 12 piercing six cold take full gotcha and then now we're gonna do the trip so first one 20 uh no okay and now, and now I get a plus 10 for this one. I think you gotta get into the 30 range.

I get a plus 23 of this roll. Roll crowd, roll loud. 26. I rolled a natural 3. Oh, man! Nope. We almost lived. We almost lived. But hey, you did do a little tiny bit of damage to him.

More damage than Baron did that round. It is Pembroke's turn. All right, so... Hey, man, I'm at a natural choke point. That's what I'm thinking. So I'm thinking that... So my plan was to just kind of stay out of the way unless there was trouble.

Right. But I was also thinking that they were going to come back after they completed this deed. I see now that they're not on their way back. Would that give me incentive? Would that give me an opportunity to get to them now?

It's just like, I'm going to go see if there's trouble. I think... Would that be reason enough for me to do that? The issue is that Baron left. You know what I mean? When was Baronon gonna come back um that's the thing like he i saw him go to dive down and not come back he also saw faraza

get out of bird shape and land on the ground no he didn't he probably wouldn't say that yeah i would say yeah this is this is this is a real tough one because the thing is that these combat rounds take sec take a long time for us but it's only a matter of six seconds yeah but it also took them a little while to get to where they are right now I would say you have to sit out this round and by next round you have to be like something's wrong okay

alright and it is now the four armed creature he goes by the name of three armed three armed excuse me three goes by the name of Kupanarth Kupan of Coopanarth Coopanarth Coopanarth Coopanarth Ho there, Coopanarth

Ho there, Coopanarth How's the stew today? Baron says with his frost giant mask I was just coming to taste the stew Bang Matthew, my gun does not make any noise right now. I put oil of silence on it. Fair enough.

He is just going to grab something from the floor and hurl it at Lork and Baron. Let's see if it hits Lork. Natural 20. God damn it. Found my neon green. Let's see if it confirms. I don't know if it's going to confirm. Actually, it won't.

14 to confirm. Does not confirm. All right. So it is exploding die with this rock or whatever it was. And no exploding die, but it's going to be 23 points of damage. That same chunk of table or whatever the hell it was goes at Baron. Almost a crit, but definitely a hit. Well, you tell me.

26. But it's not a hit. It's not a 26? It's a giant, ain't it? Let me check the subtype. Giant subtype. Damn it, it is giant. Yeah, baby.

I can't believe a 26 doesn't hit. Yeah, baby. All right, so it crushes Lork. Two unconfirmed crits. By the way, Lork, yeah, Lork is not all the way healed from yesterday. You know what I think it was? This is bad. I think the giant clearly saw an elf standing next to his frost giant friend and said, I don't want to hit that guy.

That's right. All right. Now it's the two female hill giants. The one in front of Cap Benatar does a full attack power attack. First attack, 22 to hit. Miss. Oh, really? Wow attack power attack. First attack, 22 to hit. Miss. Oh, really? Wow.

Second attack. Cat has a 22 dexterity. Second attack, 19. Misses. Yes! Cat just dodging out of the way. All right. The other one.

The cleaver just like sparking on the wood. Cat-like reflexes. Yes. The other one just charges up right next to her twin sister and just grabs a piece of something as she's going along the way and hurls it at Baron. Natural one. Yeah!

Bam! Bumble! Awesome. You win some, you lose some. I am going to the extremes here. Man. You know what? She has multiple attacks, but let me see.

Yeah, that was Fumble. Confirm Fumble. Straight up confirm Fumble. Van Fumble. Van Fumble. Van. All right. This one comes in from Danny in New Lenox, Illinois.

Ah. Sorry, love. That's the title of it. Oh, dear. Oh, my my god What? Oh my god This is amazing Did you just say it's her twin sister?

Yeah This is a Your attack This is critical specifically for Your attack misses your intended target And finds its way into the heart To the nearest relative Of someone you love

Oh no The GM chooses among your party Who you love more than anyone else And your attack is a critical threat against them. What? Will negates. Will negates. The GM chooses...

Who among, you know, that you love the most, basically. So it would obviously be her twin sister. Uh, would it? And it's a critical threat. Would it? Or do they have a sexual relationship with this creature? Sure, sure. Sure, it's up to you.

Which they do, as written in the creature. Sure, it's up to you. Which they do as written in the AP. Oh, wow. So she goes to swing and the weight of this item flips her around and she flings it at her lover.

She gets a will save to avoid this. Okay. And it's Baron's AC. She fails. Okay, so it's a critical threat against him. It's a critical threat?

Yeah, yeah. So roll to confirm. Not a crit. All right, so it's just, yeah. So roll to confirm. Not a crit. All right, so it's just a hit. So straight up damage, and I'll tell you how much damage. Great, great crit there, Danny. That was cool. Sorry, love.

That's great. So she hits him for 17 points of damage. Nice! All right. That is pretty damn good. And that is them. So now we're going to round two, and it is Lork's turn. All right.

Lork is going to try to keep this going here. He is going to attack the giant that's hovering over Cat. Again, the same one that he peppered last round a couple times. Okay. Perfectly clean shot here. First attack, 29 to hit. 29's going to hit. And he does 24 points of damage.

Okay, okay. Second attack, natural one. Oh, no! Oh, yeah! Oh, no. Yeah, this is a lot. Damn it. Crits and fumbles left and right.

Roll to confirm. Hummus and chips. That is not a confirmed fumble, so it's just a miss. I really needed to hit that Yeah, really Really needed to hit that Alright And last attack

Natural 19 Yeah, there we go That's gonna be a hit Oh no And he does 23 points of damage And you kill the first sister Yes!

Yes! Boom, she doubles over And falls into the boiling pot Of food Awesome And Lork is gonna call Kat back to him Alright, so Kat pulls back Yes! Yes! Boom, she doubles over and falls into the boiling pot of food. Awesome. Screaming. And Lork is going to call Kat back to him. All right, so Kat pulls back.

She's going to bring her back out of the room and just outside the door. Baron. Baron is going to do a full round attack action rapid shot against the remaining hill giant who is conveniently within my first range. Yeah, they don't know about guns. Okay, Jesus Christ. See, I'm trying to save time. That is a hit.

That is a total of 20 points of damage. You're trying to save time by dropping the dice from four feet over the table. Just set them down in front of you. One is in the studio next door. Second attack. Like ping pong balls. Second attack is a 17 against Touch AC. All right, that is 18 points of damage.

All right, you better kill her. Final attack is going to be up close and deadly for a little grip point action. That is absolutely a hit. That is 23 points of damage plus 33 points of damage total. Oh, my God. She's still kicking. She is still kicking, but it was worth the grit. It's amazing how much damage you can do in one round.

Alright. Feyraza. Oh no. He already killed the other one. Never mind. That's right. Feyraza. Feyraza is going to reach a talon over to Cat Benatar and cast Righteous Might. You made her a giant Cat Benatar?

She's giant Cat Benatar. Oh my god, I can't wait to do this. Her height immediately doubles. Her weight increases by a factor of eight. She gets a plus four bonus of strength, minus two dexterity. And DR, right? And DR. What is it with you and giant cats? I just like a giant cat.

She likes what she likes. So Righteous Might. Oh my god. That's amazing all right amazing now pembroke skit i'm gonna get a lot of shit for this it was the episode five or six episodes ago where i let baron and lork uh get involved in that silo fight when they really had no business doing it but i really i truly believe that you had a plan with them and it doesn't make sense that they're not back already. Yeah. So you're going to go over there and join the fight. I'm going to, yeah, go see where I saw them disappear.

The last place I saw like behind the, the, uh, stockade. All right. So you fly over there? No, I'm going, I still have two castings of dimension door. Okay. So that's is 760 feet. Would that get me... I actually have to look at the map here.

Is that what they got me close enough? I think. Skid, no problem. You can get there. I mean, when I say it's going to take you all 760 feet to get near that silo, if I brought out a ruler right now, it would probably be exactly. But you can open that door and show up right behind it. Okay, so I boom. and show up right behind it okay so I boom I and I appear like right

behind so you're behind that stockade behind the burnt-out hull of the silo and you don't see them roll a perception check okay or survival that is a 21 perception you see a little dwarf tracks leading in the direction of the mess hall okay so I with my cane start hobbling over, like, down these tracks. Hobbling over.

And you see, like, you look to your left, because you're moving south, and you just see the mammoths are still running about. They're trying to corral them. There's chaos happening everywhere. Giants are running back and forth, screaming. The barn is, like, now the embers have started to come down. I mean, it is a real scene. Yeah, man.

And it is the three-armed creature's turn. Three arms! Joe has left to make Cat Benatar large because he gets very upset when the pawns aren't exactly correct. It also really increases the joy of the moment. She's now an enormous tiger. It is pretty cool. All right, so it's this guy's turn again. I don't like playing this game,

this game of possum that we always play where I just run right up into Baron's gun range. It's the best. I don't enjoy it as much as I did the first 150 episodes. I believe that the Europeans call it the beautiful game. All right, so I thought you were going to say Pathfinder. I don't like playing this game anymore. So he comes up like right between the two cauldrons behind the one remaining female hill giant.

For her part, she charges at Baron with her cleaver. 29 to hit. Precisely a hit. Oh, 29 AC. You're going to live forever. You're going to live forever. And she does 16 points of damage. Just boom, cleaver to the chest.

Round three. Lork. Lork is going to try to take out this giant with defensive bow stance. So he is going to use one of his hunter's tricks, and he's going to fire this bow, do a full round action, and fire the bow right at the giant who's right in front of him that just hit Baron. Okay. So first attack.

This is going to provoke. No, this is my new understring. Oh, understring. That's right. Yeah. You were saying it to me and I was listening to you and I still said, well, that's going to provoke. Yeah.

Oh, what an amazing trick. So that's a 25 to hit. Yeah, that'll hit. And 21 points of damage. Oh, nice. And you kill her. Boom. Oh, that's what an amazing trick. So that's a 25 to hit. Yeah, that'll hit. And 21 points of damage. Oh, nice. And you kill her! Boom! Right? So this is what I imagine. She runs up. He pulls out the bow. Like, right through the throat, right? Yeah. She drops, giving him

a clear view of this guy with the three arms. Yeah, awesome. And he's just like, two down, one to go. And he fires a cracked die on a natural 19 And then a natural 18 There we go 26 points of damage

What was the total to hit? Oh I'm sorry the total to hit was 35 Yeah that'll hit 26 points of damage Is that what I said? Yes 26 points of damage And then last attack which sounds A lot like it's not going to hit. Probably not.

Oh, that is a 29. You son of a bitch. That hits. Yes. Yes. Oh, and I did a lot of damage. I did. Oh, my God.

21. 28 points of damage. Oh, man. Oh, my God. All right. It is Baron's turn. 28 points of damage Oh my god Alright it is Baron's turn No it's not Cat Benatar Oh I'm sorry giant cat Alright Cat Benatar he's gonna say attack

I don't even know if he could stop her from attacking As a large cat She's going to flank out around to the side To keep the lane clear. That will provoke. Yeah, yeah. She will provoke an attack. All right.

That's going to provoke, and he's going to go ahead and bite her as she comes by. So he's just like... Weird. Bites 24. That is a hit. Actually, I'll bolster companion, and it misses. Are you allowed to do that after I tell you what the result of the roll is? Yeah, I think so.

Troy was staring at Joe as he was looking at the rule, and then just closed one of his eyes for a while and kind of turned his head. I was aiming. A ranger can use this trick as an immediate action when his animal companion is hit with an attack. There you go. All right. There you go. So it increases her AC by four. So now it misses.

Now it misses. And if the attack still hits, then you have the damage. And you subtracted her minus two AC for being larger. Yeah, but she made up one AC. Yeah. Got it. Yeah, yeah, no, no. I got it.

Yep. All right. So he tries to bite out at her. No. And Lork's like, watch out for the third arm. And like that, watch out for the bite. And she jumps out of the way. And then Kat will do a quick bite, which is a little more powerful now.

Sure. A little more powerful now, this bite. Oh, no. Oh, I rolled max damage, too, but it's a 17 to hit on the bite. 17 to hit misses on the bite. All right. Let me see here. Her hit points went so far up.

Awesome. It is Baron's turn. Baron is going to spend a grip point to be able to resolve against his targets. Touch AC even out of my first range increment. Oh, that's a misfire. No! Misfire. It's my

favorite word in the podcast word So Baron's going to Cease this action And going to spend a move action To clear the misfire condition From his gun he only has one grit point left Oh yeah Oh no It takes so much joy for a misfire

Oh no Um Woof Woof So much joy from his time. Farazza. Oh, no. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Meow. Farazza is going to... Remember the slaves she saved as she dies.

Wow. Wishful thinking. Farazza is going to cast Barkskin on Baron. Oh, okay. Making him virtually unhittable with that AC against Giants. That's what I was thinking. That's very, very smart. Very good.

Very good at what you do. All right, Pems. Are you moving at all, Ferrazza? Do you want to move into the room right within the guy's range? Pass. Okay. Just need to know if that's on your mind. Thanks for asking.

Alright, so Pembroke, you're about 80 feet away from that back door back there, but you see the footsteps look like they're leading right to the mess hall. What do you want to do? Okay, and I probably hear sounds of struggle. That's what's happening. Yeah, I mean, there's so much happening, but you if you're trained in on that, you

can hear that fight going on, but probably the giants don't hear it going on. Yeah, yeah mean, there's so much happening, but if you're trained in on that, you can hear that fight going on. But probably the giants don't hear it going on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's also a stampede going on. Right. Yeah, yeah. So it's just, they're in trouble. And he's just like, just kind of like trudging through the snow as fast as he can.

Double moves up to the door. I could just picture this. Yeah. Yeah. And how far can you move? Oh, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait. No, I dimension step.

I forgot I could do that. Oh, you got one more dimension step. Boom. No, no, no. Wait, wait, wait. No, I dimension step. I forgot I could do that. Oh, you got one more dimension step. Boom. No, no, no. This is different. This is not dimension door. This is dimension step. That's my ability.

Right. So I dimension step right behind them. Right behind them. All right. So Pembroke just appears right behind Bam. He is the best. And I see what's happening, and I start casting summon monster five. Ah.

All right. Dimension step is a power. That doesn't count as a spell. Yeah, that's a move action. That's 5. Ah. All right. Dimension Step is a power. That doesn't count as a spell. Yeah, that's a move action. That's a move action. All right. And yeah, you start casting Summon Monster 5. All right.

It's this creature's turn. God, I never get to use my cool monsters. Do I kill the cat or do I get up there and do one attack on these guys and take the attack of opportunity from cat, which will most certainly miss? Oh, it's such a pickle. I am going to take the attack of opportunity from cat Benatar and get right up in your business. You know what you're doing? You're hashtag playing smart. And so go ahead.

Take your attack of opportunity. All right. A quick gentleman's bite of opportunity. Ooh, that is a 27. Damn it, you hit. Yes. Oh, nice. Nine points of damage.

Does she have combat reflexes? Combat reflexes? No. That's too bad. Yeah. All right. So nine points of damage. Okay.

I think, you know, we've visited a lot of places in the past 30, 40 episodes, but you know where we haven't been in a long time? Rentown? I know. We haven't been to Cleveland. Oh, no! Welcome to the queue where LeBron James

reigns supreme! Cleveland rocks. We're gonna try and cleave Baron and Lork. It's Lork first. So first Lork and Baron. So with a mace, he's just coming through. It's so smart because you're going to hit Lork.

You're not necessarily going to hit Baron, so you've got to start with Lork. All right, so here we go. Oh, that is going to be a 34 to hit Lork. Just missed. At this point, I don't know what to expect. That might be a miss with you guys. Alright, you ready for some Dimage? For some Joe Dimaggio? I'd rather not.

It's juicy. It's 25 points of damage on that first hit. Now, of course, its AC has gone down when it uses Cleave. That's just part of the game. And now, man, I just want to hit Baron.

I would really like to hit Baron. Let's see. Who doesn't want to hit Baron? Son of a bitch in China. That is a miss. Baron looks at the giant and says, people in Hell want ice water. You'll find out soon enough. As a swift action.

Nope. Yep. I disagree. It has a swift action. The third arm. The third arm. The third arm. It just worked by the neck.

It grosses everyone out just by showing it to us. It has this action called swift claw. So the claw comes out and it goes after Baron. I gotta hit Baron. Damn it, I missed again! I rolled two threes. Three and a three! Son of a bitch!

God, I want to talk with this monster! It is a classic D&D monster! I never get to play it again! Alright, new round. It is Lorc's turn. these Alright new round It is Lork's turn Alright new round Okay Lork is going to use Another defensive bow stance

So now he's used four of six For the day So you get only a certain amount And this combines with his bolster companion too So I've used two of those And one defensive booster. Curious. Or two now.

And he'll do full attack action, deadly aim, rapid shot. Okay. So first shot is a 28. Yep. Nice. AC went down, so. And he does 24 points of damage. Oh, my God.

Second attack is also a hit and does 22 points of damage. And then third attack is a miss. Now, does that defense of both stands count for each attack or it's each round? Until the start of your next turn. I didn't want to interrupt Joe's cadence, but Baron is going to take a target of opportunity attack on his last successful shot. What? How does this work again? My solo tactics teamwork feat allows me to take an immediate shot upon a creature that has

hit with a ranged attack within 30 feet of me, and last I checked, he could spit on me. Any creature that's hit with you in a range you can take an immediate attack on, and it doesn't provoke? No, it'll provoke. Now, here's the thing. He took his attack of opportunity against Cat Benatar.

Yep. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, so I can't take it against Baron. All right. We are getting into some gritty rules here. Yeah, I'm thinking about, like, I didn't have a choice to not take it against you, Joe. I can't take it. Right. And I can't take it against Baron.

You sound so sad. That's a hit. That is a 20 against Touch AC for a total of 28 points of damage. Oh my god. Are you gonna kill this thing? It is still alive. Very barely so. Well, now it's my turn. And now

it's Ben's turn. So it's time to take three more shots at it. Oh my gosh. Oh, that's a hit. What's that dice, Joe? Thank you. So that is 26 points of damage. And set. Yeah! See ya!

See ya! Wow. Anyway, what happens with Pember? Well, I just realized that it's not... Dimension Steps is not a move action. It's a standard action. So all 50 angry nerds writing your letters to me. Put down your quills.

Crumple up that parchment. Throw it away because there's no point in correcting me. I remember. Got a little sloppy as some combats do when you get all excited. But I think across the board we got it right. Well, I was really excited. I would make that guarantee. I have not had a chance to use Hunter's tricks like left and right like that.

But you have to remember, if you use an immediate action, you can't do a swift during your turn. And I had forgotten that. Something that won't be a problem in Pathfinder 2nd Edition. Right, right. Oh, you can't take a swift during your turn at all. Right. Oh, so now, so this is good. You told me this after I was able to use a move action to reload my pistol that all. Right. Oh, so now, so this is good. You told me this after I,

I was able to use a move action to reload my pistol that time. Right. But reloading my pistol is technically swift actions. So I wouldn't have been able to take more than one shot. No, no, no.

They're free actions. Free actions, that's right. Okay, thank God. Yeah, they're not swift because then you can only do it once per turn. Okay, good. Everybody take a deep breath.

That was juicy. I need a beer. I do too. I need a cigarette and I don't even smoke. That was juicy I need a beer I do too I need a cigarette And I don't even smoke That was intense Yeah Alright

Now What do you guys want to do? Search the body We'll carry the bodies out of here Roll them off the cliff This was a huge creature By the way I don't think we ever said that

Throughout I just said large creature But I put the pawn out You guys too It's huge It's a huge creature Pembroke like looks around Like wheezing And does a knowledge local on this thing.

22. It's an Atak. Atak. A-T-H-A-C-H. Too bad he didn't get that Atak of opportunity. I know, right? Am I right? Give me back all your bones.

Am I right? Right. Now. He says, I was worried when he didn't come back. What the hell is that? This goes back to original D&D, the Atox. It first appeared in the third edition of the Monster Manual. Oh, so that's D&D...

Advanced. Yeah, third edition. Yeah, third edition. Can I do a cone of detect magic on the room and the bodies to try to find auras so we can get in and get out of here quick? Sure. I mean, they barred that front door. Right. All right.

So you do detect magic. You do detect some magic glowing around the neck of the Atak. Ooh. I'll go and yank it off of its neck. You yank this torque off of his neck. A little spellcraft? When's the last torque you found? One of the stone giants, remember?

Yeah, I do remember that. Farazza and Baron turn to Pembroke and say, Oh, with your wise, infinite wisdom, could you please help us know what this torque is? Don't play my character. All right. Only Baron does that. Yes. Don't play my character. All right. All right. Only Baron does that. Yes. Let me take a look.

That is 25. 25. Yeah, that'll do. I have a pitcher. A pitcher? A pitcher. Oh. Is that like a crown?

I have a crown of this item. It looks like this. Oh. That's badass. Fancy. It looks like the thing that takes arthritis away from golfers. Yeah, those copper...

What? You never heard of this? It takes arthritis away from golfers? It's total snake oil. It takes it away from golfers and gives it to their ex-girlfriends. Never heard of this? This is known as a torque of enmity. never heard of this this is this is known

as a torque of enmity specifically a torque of giant enmity in this case I'll give you a little story here it says the tribes of northern Avastan long ago learned that anger

and hatred were valuable tools for combat and their shamans created torques of enmity to allow their warriors to channel their rage and wrath against their most despised foes. So this Atak happened to be wearing one such torque of enmity geared specifically towards giants. geared specifically towards giants. Whoa.

So was it you, Skid, that said maybe he's being put here to be punished? Yeah, yeah. In a way, he was. He didn't get along with the giants. Bottle cap. Bottle cap. Bottle cap. Yeah. All right.

All right. Oh, no. Let's head through it. Let's head through it. Clear across the room. I'll memorize this location and come back later. It's over in a pile of Grant's Dice. We've got to clean that up someday. Are we going to buy a broom ever? They're all on 17. I'll memorize this location and come back later. It's over at a pile of Grant's Dice in the corner at all.

We've got to clean that up someday. Are we going to buy a broom ever? They're all on 17. This large neck ring is made of twisted bronze, capped at each end with tiny skulls, just like the picture, facing each other. Two skulls facing each other. It basically, where this one is geared towards giants, it's attuned. It basically, where this one is geared towards giants, it's attuned. It's similar to the Bane special ability and focuses the wearer's hatred towards giants. Each time the wearer of a Torque of Enmity confirms a crit against a giant,

you gain a plus one morale bonus on attack rolls against that creature type and 1d8 temporary hit points for five rounds oh wow cool so you confirm a crit against a giant beginning of a fight so anything with a giant subtype you're going to get a plus one to attack rolls and a plus five excuse me and plus 1d8 temporary hit points for the next five rounds cool against any. Against anyone with a giant subtype. Yeah. Alternatively, if the wearer is, let's say, an Inquisitor. Are there any Inquisitors in the room? Or has the Bane class feature, which I don't think any of you have.

She can instead choose to gain one additional round of her Bane class ability. Nice, I'll get that next level. This is kind of like the same deal with Urathash's gear that I got in that it's not really applicable to me yet because I'm only level 3, which is very low for this part of the adventure. If poor Amlo is still around,

if the wearer has the Rage class feature, she can instead regain one use of a rage power that's been exhausted. Very cool. The wearer can gain only one benefit per round from the torque even if she confirms multiple critical hits in a single round.

These benefits must be used within one hour of their accrual. If not used by that time, they are lost as the wearer's hatred subsides. A very, very interesting little piece of magic. It's cool.

Yeah, it's really cool. And more, all the more interesting to show that like all is not well in Skirgard. Yeah. Right.

You've got the cook, the guy in charge of feeding them has a torque of giant enmity. Was he afraid of the giants? Was he secretly

against the giants? We'll never know. But apparently he had two giant lovers, so. He had two giant lovers. I don't want to hear that story. I was excited to role play it. Just came in, guns blazing. Quick, grab that instrument again, Joe.

We can play some beautiful music for them. Does he have anything else on him? He does not. What weapons? anything else on him he does not uh what weapons like but if you contain continue uh detecting magic you do uh feel more magic in the room really you see a chest in the far corner of uh near the back door who's good at unlocking things nobody in this party i do have knock all right i have knock prepared great knock that lock yeah knock that lock dog opens well not necessarily it's uh it's a 30 on disabled device oh yeah okay it was not uh not a great lock okay uh and inside you see a large suit of frost giant hide armor.

Spellcraft thatch. Why was he hiding frost giant hide armor? Did he steal it from one of them? I think he killed one. Killed one. Why are they barring the doors? Yeah. Yeah.

Very interesting. All was happening during the stampede. Huh. Very, very interesting. All was happening during the stampede. Huh. Very, very interesting. Wait a minute. Could, I mean, could he have been working against the giants in the camp? Could he be like a spy from another giant sect of some kind or something? It's weird that he's wearing a torc of giant enmity and had, and it was hiding a piece of or a set of armor

and was barring the doors when they would have needed to get in the most and he was hooking up with twins and he's hooking up with twins it's like the worst bud light commercial ever uh can i spell craft the armor uh sure uh 22 so at Pembroke, as you look at it and try and determine what's going on here, it's plus three hide armor. But the reason it's probably locked up and hidden away is it's made from the skin of a frost giant. Wow. This is worth a lot of gold, by the way.

Is it really? For a frost giant, 54,165 gold pieces. It says most good folk consider wearing the skins of intelligent creatures to be abhorrent. Giants gain a plus two morale bonus on attack and damage rolls against the wearer, or a plus four if the wearer's armor is made from the same kind of giant as the attacker. Interesting. So it almost cancels out the bonus at a certain level against the giants. But against everything else.

That might have been multiple frost giants' bodies. He's like the Buffalo Bill of Skirgard. Seriously. Is it all right? Oh, wait. Was she a great big giant person? Troy, can I just put this in a UPS box and ship it over to the Atlantis subcontinent for Dracius to wear in the other campaign.

Is that all right? I don't think it's going to work, Graeme. Okay. I'll allow it. Thank you. Thank you. I'm the game master here. I say he can do it.

He's drunk with power. So what do we want to do? Do we want to poison this food or do we want to burn this building to the ground? I'm just saying both are options. Yeah, I think that we just burn it to the ground there's no sense poisoning the food because yeah there's not enough here and they'll just go get more food eventually i mean not that that wouldn't be a nice pain in the ass but you burn it down there people are gonna be they're gonna have to start leaving yeah legitimately once this thing goes well presumably there's another place to eat but

i think yeah i think we just cut off this well it's like if you walk into a murder scene like you're not all right oh man it's a swarble let's see yeah well i mean they're giants so maybe they're into that what's your escape route that's that's the other problem well we gotta that's a pretty major well no no i think we're okay uh i still have one dimension door spell left so i can take three other people other than me back to the camp oh so cat gets back on her no i'll fly back so yeah okay oh i wasn't volunteering i just stopped playing my character stop playing my animal companion grant um yeah that works great oh my god we have a built-in escape route yeah magic is amazing magic is the best before we leave though can we just just to get some more intel on this place in general can we

just take a quick look at the food stores and stuff and what we're doing so hurt are you hurt we have to go all right are you really hurt uh yeah i mean he's at 20 of 80 cure light ones oh beautiful all right so you want to just take a look at the food it's yeah i just want to see if there's any more info we can get on what they're feeding them. Are they feeding them slaves for sure here? You got any biscuits? Crumpets? Something to nosh on?

It's been a long day. We really need a snack. There's Slim Jims here. Pirate's Booty. Cheesy Poofs. We haven't role-played any snacking in a while. Yeah. We should.

We haven't role played any snacking in a while Yeah It made me think of it with the When we had the mammoth thing How we are all Thoroughly unshowered Oh we gotta be disgusted We gotta bathe I'm just a bird

She was odorless briefly We should take this cauldron Back to our camp with us and set it up as a as a bathtub like a hot tub yeah that would be the best metal on it put the snow in it yeah hell yeah fill it with snow my god victory hot tub tonight yeah it's like all of the old westerns where they like finally get in from the dusty trail make me a bath woman yeah I mean it looks like they're they're making some sort of porridge or gruel in the morning and stew at night and the stew definitely contains body parts there's evidence of human so burning it to the ground is probably the best thing that's the. That's the best thing we can do. It's definitely an option.

Yes. Beren just says a quiet to himself prayer to Torag for the safe passage of these souls through Phrasma's lair. Pembroke nods. He's like, whatever we're going to do, we should probably do it quickly. Yeah. I'm going to burn it to the ground with a wall of fire. Good idea. And hopefully I'm going to use the wall to hopefully knock over the cauldrons and that will hopefully take care of it.

So you just start burning it down again. Yeah. I mean, I'll wait until everybody gets out. Sure, sure, sure. You're like, all right, guys, ready? Roll furnish. Fraza closes the door. I've got a surprise for you.

It's all barred from the front. This is perfect. You're just burning hands, did you say? Wall of fire. Wall of fire. So you just burn the entire place down as you're walking out laughing like a crazy person. Pembroke, you Dimension Door who out of there? Everyone except for Faraza.

Who's still a turn, so she'll fly back. All right, so you take Baron, Lork, and Cat Benatar, and Faraza as a turn flies back to the camp. And they don't get to see it because they leave in a blank Feyraza, but if your little bird neck turns around enough, you see that the barn embers have almost completely died down

and now that building is all in flames. And people are like, oh my God, what is happening? What is happening? I love it. As mammoths are just running

all around the entire camp. It's a disaster. I mean, they're going to have to be really careful because that's really close to the tents. They're going to have to put that, like, try to, like, stop the fire from spreading. I was just throwing snow on it really fast. I mean, you guys have caused a huge, huge situation here and one that they may not so quickly recover from.

That was their kitchen. It's a successful night. If you just killed the Atak and the hill giants, they would have just installed somebody else as the cook. Now that building is gone, they've got to relocate the cooking things. There's no source of, well, actually, they could get a new brewer in there, but the beer supply has been low the past couple days. Morale has to be incredibly low.

In the toilet. And there are mammoths running amok throughout the camp. So you get back and you've got to be probably pretty proud of yourselves. Yeah. Lurk is very excited. Very successful night. You took out the mammoth stockade and the mess hall. The mess hall that you've been eyeing since like your first foray into the camp.

And during the day we saved our first slaves. Yeah, you saved all the same day. Slaves, you know, it might be it's going to be two at a time. But how many are going to die in the meantime? But you can't worry about that. I mean, we can. I am. I am worrying about it.

Yeah, you're not. You can only be so victorious or you can only be so celebratory here before you go to bed. Don't fuck up our hot tub time. I'm not supporting this hot tub idea. All right. So I'm assuming you guys just want to call it a night. Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. After the hot tub. Yeah. Burn a couple of spells. I want to get any healing we can. Yeah. Yeah. Cats.

Cat. And Lark. Yeah. And Cat and Lark took some hits. All right. So you guys want to bed down. Yes. Yes. Yeah Yeah Kat's Kat must have And Lork Yeah and Kat and Lork Took some hits Alright so You guys want to bed down Yes What are you guys

Talking about overnight Like the plan For the next day Like you've You've got to look at Baron's finger drawing Map again To figure out

What the hell Do we do next I was thinking We should check out That the warehouse Type building The newish building That he kind of

Made note of What we think Might be the gristmill That might be the grist mill. That might be the grist mill. Yeah, yeah, I like that. That might be a good place to check out tomorrow. Yeah, especially if we're cutting out the food supply. They're probably going to be all worried about what's burnt nearby

and their backs are going to be turned to it, so it's a good idea. And if it's the last thing that's producing food, we can take that out, sabotage it somehow. And if we have any prior recon to that, I'd also love to know what that last long house is that we haven't really inspected at all the big one yeah the real big one oh you know what the other thing though you know we have to be careful because if we if we wipe out all of their food sources we have to do that last because then they're just going to start eating slaves good

point good point so grain actually probably the one thing we want them to eat yeah so you still you still want to go there first i'm i'm wondering what you guys think is the best time i mean it's probably nighttime is the answer but i'm still really curious about that frost and fire giant teaming up to build these crazy things on this ice yeah lork is very hesitant to approach anywhere near that fire giant it hasn't really if we don't really need to uh it's very dangerous yeah i'm assuming we took that armor by the way right yeah nope i have here that you left it but i i do i went up with the wall of fire i do think we should probably sell it at some point yeah and buy some other stuff with it

uh well we have the long house the nice long house that's very suspicious at the top of the hill. Yeah, I don't know. Lork is getting eager to get the show on the road. Yes. In the sense that we think we're making progress here. And we're also like Lork is kind of almost giddy with how much we are kicking ass right now against these giants and he wants to keep rolling with that momentum and like obviously you don't want to push too far but there's no reason that we have to live in such fear of these things right

now in his eyes i agree he thinks we're really powerful and as long as we can keep them separated from each other and catch a few we should just start killing them wherever we can find it yeah i do think that in our camp tonight though after this much type of concentrated stuff as much fear as it's causing i imagine that patrols might be going up more never so we might want to set up some like trip wires around the area or definitely have watches set up tonight as we rest sure well they where we are, they can't really get to us anyway. Okay. So. Watch is never a bad idea, though.

Yeah, watch is a good idea, but I mean... I mean, do you know? They'd have to climb up a cliff to get to where we are, you know? We have dire wolves. Oh, yeah, the dire wolf cave. Flavor drakes.

Flavor drake. This large long house, the beautiful temple, and then the Mamba Jamba. What's the Mamba Jamba? The entrance where Skirkotla is. Oh, yeah. And there's also this building down the southwest in the lower camp that we never checked out. I just had an idea about the Flavor Drake's. It's true.

We get someone to be cast invisible, blow the Drakebane horn in the middle of, like, a camp and, like, drop it there. And any Drake over a certain CR level. Yes, and height. They have to be this tall to ride the flavor roller coaster. I'm Connor. They will be drawn to it and want to attack. It'll scare away any lesser Drakes, but it'll draw... It might even draw Noxemara to it, actually.

So we might want to do it with care in that case. But that's another option. Faye Raza, do you tell Baron about the caves down in the mines? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally. We got distracted by the slave story. The slave story, yeah, but now that you have this time to talk. I describe it to Baron, and in that moment I took to remember what it looked like. Baron, roll a knowledge engineering based on Feyraz's description.

18. The way Feyraz is describing it, that sounds like very dangerous construction. Oh. Take it down. Very haphazard, like whoever did it didn Oh. We can take it down. Very haphazard. Like, whoever did it didn't really know what they were doing, and it wouldn't take much to sabotage those. Take out the supports.

Oh, yeah. I mean, I should have cast Warp Wood while I was there. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That was stupid. Oh, man. I had to prepare, too. You might have killed yourself, though.

You might have got caught in there. All right. I let Farazza know that she's an idiot first and then no that's she's that's a standard action uh yeah real furnish um so i say faraza do you think you can go back and uh under uh some some degree of subterfuge and and and visibility and hiding your scent you you could do something to mess up those beams? Sure. Great role play, guys. Thanks.

Oh, boy. I was just enthralled. I couldn't. I mean, what else was I supposed to say? I was watching Glenn Ross earlier today, and that rivals anything in that show. John, my daughter. I just laid out

the red carpet for this asshole and then he yanks it out from under me. Are you writing partners now? Are you writing partners? Sure. Wouldn't that excite Farazza perhaps the idea that we're one step closer to taking on this whole camp? Maybe your eyes widen at the prospect. You tossed up the alley

and you just watched it go by. It's like an indoor kid at a t-ball league trying to take a hit at the wiffle ball and just whoop. One of my best, best friends years ago, he told me this story about how he went out one night and had a little too many gin and tonics. And he was out on a first date with this girl and he took her to his roof the next morning. He was like stumbling at the end of the night. And he was like, last place I should have been is a roof. But the day was going really well. They were both a little tipsy.

He was a little out of control. And he was just kind of like, you know that kind of drunk where you can't even sit up straight? And they watched the sunrise. And she said to him something to the effect of like, wow, what a beautiful view for a first kiss. And he just looked at her like, yeah. That was

the equivalent of that roleplay. Yeah! I mean... I went with the bit. Sure. You got the yes down, but not the yes and. I mean, the and seems like it'll come tomorrow. Okay. Listen, I mean, it's pretty clear you guys have a lot of options.

You've got caves in the mines. You've got these caves that may be frosty caves. You've got the caves that have some sort of wolves. You've got four or five different buildings that you still, some of them you don't even know what the hell's going on in there. And then other buildings that are so grandiose and large in that northwest portion of the camp that you feel like you don't even know if you want to go up there yet um but but when are you going to that's what i was thinking is what when are we going to go for the mother load is it going to be is it are we going to reach a point where something happens and we're like now's the time when will you level up well

or do we just have to make a decision to do it? Yeah. So all these options are going through your head as you're trying to say, what the hell do we do? And then you wake up and feel like a renewed sense of purpose. Even though there's a lot left to do to make this camp disband. Can't even imagine making this camp disband. to do to make this camp disband. Can't even imagine making this camp disband. You feel like you struck a very prominent blow against the camp last night. And if you can just string together a couple more moral victories for Team True Now like that, you just might be able to succeed.

I got good news and I got bad news. What do you want to hear first? Bad news. Bad news. The bad news is, Lork want to hear first? Bad news. Bad news. The bad news is Lork, you didn't level up. The good news is

everyone else did. We got Pembroke at 10. We got Feyrozza at 10. We got Baron at 11. And we'll see you next week. Woo! This one goes to Eleven.

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