The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 164 - The Temple of Detrimental Evil

Episode Date: July 17, 2018

The party uncovers a new kind of evil as they venture deeper into the strange temple. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. I fear there is another necromancer about the place. Yes. Let us keep looking. Despite the horrors lying before them. I think Farazza is so deeply mortified by this. The heroes move deeper into the temple. And we should face our fears and go further in, I think.

I agree. And steel themselves against the evils within. Yes, let us be done with this abomination. No more. But nothing can prepare them. Oh, servitors. For her. Join me!

The adventure continues. Today you will die. Right now. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of the Glass Cannon Podcast. It's your boy, Grant Berger, a.k.a. Baron Ashpeak, and boy, howdy, have we got a lot of stuff going on in the show. Today, however, we don't have a ton of business to talk about but i will tell you that if you have not yet check out our website glasscanonpodcast.com follow us on twitter follow us on instagram and there's two things you can do to really help us out if you check out our patreon and pledge to us at five dollars a month not only do you support this great show you get access to one of our

favorite shows on the whole network ruins of aslant ruins of of Asland is helmed by our own Skidmar, so you finally get to see what Skidmar's great role-playing mind can get up to when it's in charge of running an adventure. The other thing you can do to help us out is to leave a review for us on iTunes, not just of Giant Slayer, but also if you listen to Androids and Aliens, it would be a huge help. So without further ado, please do enjoy episode 164. I wonder if there are people out there that don't enjoy episodes like the last two weeks. You think there are people out there that don't care for that kind of stuff? You mean really good ones? Yeah, like really good ones that we all really enjoy.

That we all really have fun doing and are excited about afterwards. Right, and can't wait for the next session. Can't wait for the next one to happen. Probably. Our feelings don't matter. I don't think there's one that wouldn't like those episodes. One person alive. Joe, you don't know some of our lives.

You mean, Troy, the ones that kind of revivify our desire to play this game and enjoy it with each other and record it with each other and get out here and do it and just keep on doing what we're doing? The opposite of that. The opposite of that. Oh. Oh. Grant, Joe, will you take away that bottle from me?

I think Grant was trying to put a positive spin on your negative. Yes, yes, yes, yes. I think Grant was trying to put a positive spin on your negative energy. I'm just saying, I had more fun those last two weeks. I'm sorry, it's not a question of people liking episodes or not. It's a question of who likes that in their game. Who likes long, extended sessions where you don't roll a die or you don't fight a monster? And I gotta say, I don't like it for that long. Now, I had a good time our last two sessions.

Right. A really good time. But I like rolling dice. Yeah. And we hadn't done that a lot lately. Sure. Which makes it more exciting that I think we're on the cusp of that now. And I think that's what makes it even more exciting is when you don't do it for a while. You got to have times when you don't do it.

Sure. I mean, most times if we're playing a normal session, we'd have four or six hours and there might be three hours of straight role playing and then another three hours of combat, you know? Oh man, we did that in the Jade Regent days. Oh yeah. The whole afternoon's just role playing. Yeah.

It's just like five hours. What nerds? Just role playing. Losers. What losers? The city of... Oh yeah. I don't want to say what it is.

Spoiler alert, but I mean, there was one session we role played for eight hours yeah it was not a single combat and i we did roll dice that there were like oh yeah diplomacy stuff but would you disagree that was one of our favorite sections so memorable so memorable i still have nightmares about that face you know oh indelibly etched in our brain well you know for us, we're trying to show the whole gamut of what this game can be while also stretching its limits.

And I, for one, am excited for where this is going to go because the last two weeks have opened up this story in ways that people at this table and people listening at home may not put together for a long, long time. But now I think we're going to take a little return to form here,

because you're back in this lovely room of death. That was the other thing about the last two weeks. Not enough Ace Ventura 2 references. Right. We really needed to get those back in the show. We sure do. We sure do. We sure do. If we had managed to reincarnate Lorca, I was just going to shout, like a glove!

When you woke up in your new body. Am I the only person that's never seen any of those movies? Yep. It's good. You've never seen Ace Ventura 2? Oh, come on. It's not Jurassic Park. No, I never liked Jim Carrey at all.

Well, it's a lot of Jim Carrey. You would not care for this movie, then. I don't think it's for me, honestly. It is Jim Carrey. It is Jim Carrey at all. Well, it's a lot of Jim Carrey. You would not care for this movie, then. I don't think it's for me, honestly. It is Jim Carrey. It is Jim Carreist, you could say. I know there are a lot of listeners of this show that love that movie and find it highly quotable. It is a highly quotable film. Yeah, and I'm always confused.

It's Jim Carrey I don't like. Jim Cotta I love. Jim Cotta. I love Jim Cotta. It's great. I think it's safe to say if you're 38 to 41 years old, that movie you watched at least a hundred times. I think that's the thing. I'm too old. I was too old for that movie when it came out. You just missed it.

Right. I was already an adult when it came out. You already knew it was silly nonsense. Right. We did not know that yet. I was in elementary school when it came out. Matthew wasn't allowed to watch it. I was not.

It was PG-13. Snuck it at a sleepover. You rebel. That's the best. Actually, I remember feeling guilty about it. Because I had people turn it on and I was like, huh? You went to confession. I told the priest.

I'm not Catholic. I felt guilty. So I thought the pride sinned. That didn't stop me from watching you were Catholic after you saw it Matthew let's be honest what was the first I made you convert close the first R-rated movie ever saw oh I don't know he still hasn't

seen one I had I had a certain point in my life I had free access to the HBO so there was see that's the thing to see that's the generation gap between you and me also is like if there wasn't the same distinction like I remember distinctly the first R-rated movie that I went to go see because like it was a big deal jade on a parts of jade on it's just on tv like they're on tv uncut so it's not a big deal what was yours kid uh beverly

hills cop oh mine was beverly hills cop 2 oh there you go not two as in also now when i was a kid i would sneak and watch stuff that i wasn't supposed to. But that wasn't watching an R-rated movie. No, no. In the traditional sense. In the theater, that was the first one. My mom was just like, okay. She let me and my best friend. She got us tickets.

My dad, after my mom went to bed, said, it's fine. We can watch this. And I remember it being a very cool moment for my dad and I. There's nudity in it when they're in the strip club. And he looked at me right after that scene and said, don't tell your mother. Joe, what was your first R-rated movie?

One of my first was definitely at a buddy's house. He was like, let's watch, I believe it was Friday the 13th. And I was like, I can't. I'm notth. And I was like, I can't. I'm not allowed. And I was dead serious.

I was lawful good even back then. And he was like, stop it. They're never going to know. And so we watched it, and I was like, I felt more scared of my mom the whole movie than the actual horror film. My mom didn't want me watching scary movies, not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because if i watched a scary movie

like i was like i kept just kept peeing the bed no i just kept nice try i i just kept thinking about it and i would keep like it just like would morph into these horrific like like even worse horror stories and i would be like why can't you sleep and i would tell her the story and she's like oh really she was like you should write a play about that what about what about grant yeah great what was yours i remember two distinct r-rated movies um the first of which was uh hellraiser i remember watching that on hbo with my dad my dad had some you know a couple problems growing up and i remember telling uh a kid that i was good friends with gray in great deal detail about it the next day in second grade at age nine and him going home and telling his parents. And a week later, what a snitch.

Then a week later, my second grade teacher had an after school meeting with just me and gray's parents. My parents weren't there, but they basically were like gray. I don't. I think gray was there he may not have been they may have spared him the embarrassment of like tattletailing they're like you guys can't sit next to each other anymore but my father also took me to see the last of the mohicans in theaters oh and which prompted me to ask him after the movie uh dad why did he shoot his friend to death? Because you remember the guy's being burnt at the stake.

Yeah, yeah. And my dad was like, well, son, let me tell you about a mercy kill. It's an important moment for a father and son. Grant was four. Put him in the car ride home. The sequence of that, the shooting, the mercy kill through the end of the movie, I can't tell you how many times my dad watched that on TV. Wow.

Really? Did he feel alive watching it? What he liked to do is watch that movie and then shout all the Daniel Day-Lewis lines around the house. And my mother would be like, really? In an open bathrobe. I will find you!

Three fingers of whiskey. Stay alive! No matter what occurs! Matthew, did you ever get to stay up late enough no i used to stay up late enough to see real sex and taxi cab confessions oh yeah and those are still they haven't made any more of them i put one on the other night like to show my wife i was like this is what i used to watch when i was like a kid and they're so like weird and like out there still and fun and they're not like gross or like overly explicit it was like totally but

it like had it was a pre-internet thing to where everyone was just like wow people have sex in public sometimes and it's like that's so shocking like it's just a total it wasn't weird it wasn't like yeah it was just very odd it was very i remember being very journalistic in a way it was yeah it was like a journalistic documentary type feel to it. My only memory of Taxi Hop Confessions now is the SNL. Oh, with Tim Meadows driving the cab. I met this guy and one thing led to another. I think he ended up giving me anal warts.

Yada, yada, yada. That's Norm MacDonald, right? Was that Norm MacDonald? It was Adam Sandler. Oh, Adam Sandler. That's right. yada yada yada he was like hey you mind signing this that's norm mcdonald right was that norm mcdonald it was adam sandler oh adam sandler that's right

chris parley was the guy with the oh no or maybe it was the other way around but either way it was like oh yeah can you sign this waiver

we're doing a show for hbo yeah see this is sending me down a spiral of thinking of like what were the sexy r-rated movies

that i snuck watching and i the first one i just looked it up it was because mickey rourke was in it do you remember wild orchid oh ofuck watching. And the first one, I just looked it up. It was because Mickey Rourke was in it. Do you remember Wild Orchid? Oh, of course.

That was like my first one. 89. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's crazy. Wasn't his other one Nine and a Half Weeks? Nine and a Half Weeks. Classic.

That was another one. With Jane March. Does anybody remember? I don't know. I have not thought of this in a long time. Amazon Women on the Moon. Oh, yeah. Jeff Goldblum. Jeff goldblum's in that that

is like the one of the first sexy ones that i remember my buddy's dad had it and we watched it we were not allowed to watch it and i i was very like this is wrong yeah that's not really a sex i don't even know what it is like it's not sexy i don't remember it's not there's nudity right there's nudity in it but it's not it's it's like? There's nudity in it, but it's not. It's like a spoof on, like, 50s, you know, sci-fi. Oh, okay. I think the number one, though, that kind of freaked me out and made me turn it off, like the same way Joe saw Amazon Women on the Moon. Oh, my God.

I was like, no. But I think I finished it later, was Heavy Metal. Oh. Now, because you're a kid, and when you're watching it, and you think it's a cartoon, and it's going to be fun, and it was like before Cartoon Network existed, and you're a kid and when you're watching it and you think it's a cartoon and it's going to be fun and you're it was like before cartoon network exists and you're just excited to be watching cartoons at night and then it turns into this like hellscape of like that'll mess you up man if you see heavy metal without being properly prepared yeah like that or like fritz the cat or one of those things

mess you up is that ralph bachshi yeah yeah all right let's play some sometimes we just like hanging out. Oh, they get too much banter. That's the show. That's the show. 165 episodes. Yeah. Troy, why are you yelling?

I just get excited. I get excited. It's preemptively shout down anyone who's complaining. You're back in this room. Pembroke, Feyraza, Baron, and obviously, Four Bears. Played by Gil Cunningham. Birmingham. Birmingham.

Gil Burning Con. And you see quite a different scene. Obviously, the other giant is gone, turned into a rat. Neck snapped. The doors are open to the north and to the south. There are also doors leading to the east that you never explored because you were mid-battle. And then when Lork fell, you stripped the bodies and got out of there with his corpse. But you see that the hole that you stone-shaped into has been closed over.

Like brick and mortar? Like boulders stacked on top of each other like that can stop us yeah nice try nice try giants yeah i mean i wonder what they thought when they came and saw this just magical hole in the wall what the hell is this doesn't make sense and then they went inside norfoss was dead but he was dead already he was someone came in here and made a horrible mess the giant version of Slow Marin was on duty

you're really doubling down oh hey guys you see a patchwork body it's not even completed yet made up of a number of different limbs looking like they're trying to take all

these different uh body parts to create another undead being with orifice's head can i ask i was thinking this at the end of last episode you said kind of like a horse's leg at some point and some other body parts and it made me think of all the different creatures we've fought and killed throughout the adventure in Skirgard. Does it seem like it's the body parts of things we've slain? Well, a perception check. All right. Matty, 17 for a total of a 30-phizo. 5-0.

I was going to say, is that a 3-4? I wasn't sure if it was 5 or 4. I didn't know how to do it. 30-phizo. Granted, it's five or four i didn't know how to do it 30 fizzle granted a street lingo i never know what he means do with that what you will gm i mean you certainly recognize the i'm so sorry it was a 30 fizzle 30 fizzle 30 fizzle oh 30 fizzle it was dc 30 Fizzoo. It was DC 30 Fizzoo. Nailed it. You certainly recognize some of the pieces, like that horse stallion leg. Maybe that came from one of those half frost giant, half stallion creatures.

And certainly, I even said it looked like the lower torso of an ogre. Now, did you actually kill these particular creatures? That's impossible to tell. But it's pretty clear that these weren't sacrifices either. But what the hell are they doing? This is really weird. I think Farazza is

so deeply mortified by this. Like it was already horrific enough to see the abomination that was undead orfas and i think she's just gonna walk over and cast burning gaze and set it on fire just like superman yeah exactly like and just burn it just like your vision yeah the entire room lights on fire. Four bears sees this. And you all die. Before the flames go up, when he sees it,

his reaction is pretty stoic. He just stares at it and then he starts saying something quietly under his breath. And Pembroke, you don't even understand it, what he's saying. It's a strange sort of prayer.

And then, and that's it. But he is actually enacting something, an ability. So you burn it from legs all the way to head, and you can see Orphos' head just singe and start to melt as well. Yes, let us be done with this abomination. No more.

No more. I am a bit curious as to why a man you said you knew's head would be on top of something once again. What value could he have to these people? I do not know. He knew us. However, this seems to be a common theme,

a recurring theme. I fear there is another necromancer about the place. Yes. Or at least an amateur. Let us keep looking. You have, obviously, two doors leading up back to the room where you originally came in through the stone shape. Two doors leading down into the room from which Orpheus emerged.

In that room, there's two doors leading out. You would know, basic dungeoneering, that those would lead back outside. And the room you are in, there are two double doors leading to the east. Which we would believe leads into the heart of this cathedral temple um i think

uh horrifying yes and we should face our fears and go further in i think i agree but there's a way down did i hear i was just checking something on my hair a lot i apologize down and. Down and out. Down and out.

Okay. Yeah, I'm just... We can go further in for sure. Just any passageway that would let us circumvent the main room and get to kind of like the bottom catacombs of this place if it's possible. But if there's no other way, the way out is through. Down and out in Beverly Hills was another one of the first r-rated movies let's uh i want to take a listen at those double doors that lead further in

yeah okay roll a perception check it's not good at all 34 30 fizzle there you go that's 35 actually 30 fizzle is for There you go. That's 35, actually. 30 fizz-oo is four. Fizz-oo. Excuse me. Very faintly, you hear kind of like... That's fucked up. There is someone behind this door. Let's kill whoever it is.

I'm going to, again, detect alignment on the door. It should allow me to determine basically what direction they are through the door. So you're detecting alignment and just holding it there? Yep. 60-foot cone. You do detect evil. Great evil. As you continue to concentrate on the number of presences, you detect three,

You detect three. And it seems to be towards the back, to your left. So, north. Pembroke casts Mage Armor and Mirror Image on himself. Forebearers takes his right hand, and his left hand is this large wooden shield. Baron's sort of detecting evil, and then he comes up right next to him and does a very similar thing,

and he is going to detect undead and wave it in the area. Detect undead. Yeah. What does he get to know from detect undead? First glimpse into what this man may be. It's very similar. So you see an aura around undead creatures,

presence or absence. The longer you hold it, how many there are in the area. And also I would get to see any undead aura that is stronger than another. If it stands out as significantly stronger, I could see that.

And then the longer I hold it, it gives you exact locations. You detect undead and you feel the presence of undead. You continue to focus on it and you feel the presence of three undead. One much stronger than the other two. Oh boy. And in the same exact location where Baron detected evil. Huh.

Evil undead. Evil undead. Baron locks eyes with four bears, and in a way that they've never understood each other up to this point through the spoken word, they understand each other deeply at this moment and understand the danger that is facing them

on their first sojourn into the temple. Yes. There's great danger. By the way, when we got here, I cast Life Bubble and split it among us. That's fair. Thank you. I say we kick down the doors, and before we do, I tap each one of us with this stick Four Bears Here gave me.

What does it do? Protection from evil. Hell yeah. So you're thinking, kick the door down right before you do a little protection from evil. How long is that left? One minute from the want. So make your enemies monologue last 61 seconds. The thing I want to ask, though, before we do kick down these doors and I ask him, Pembroke.

Yes. Can you ask for bears what God he follows before I go into bed? I like to know the God a man worships before I put my life on the line with him. Four Bears, this is a little delicate, but the short one wants to know what god you worship, and also what political party you're affiliated with. Tell him I follow the word of my people, of my ancestors. Yes, he is a traditional ancestor worshiper of the Shoah. I like that.

Tell him I used to know my own ancestors or think I did, and now I'm trying to figure him out myself. I tell you. Yes, he is an atavist as well. They can be very hard to understand. Yes. Let's go before our spells expire. But we must try. Yes.

Let's go. I'm trying. Dubai time. All right. I want to see what this dude can do. Yeah. Slowly, he will slip out this mace from his belt. What's it called again?

Nahandil. I'm not sure if I'm pronouncing that correctly, but trying. Okay. I'm not sure if I'm pronouncing that correctly, but... Trying. Okay, so I don't know if there's anything else to do, but yeah, he slowly pulls this thing out and just wants to have it at the ready, just in case. By the way, is this Cherokee or something you're using as a basis? Oh, it's a mix. It is?

Yeah, it's a mix. It's mainly Navajo, but there's also Cherokee, there's Apache, there's Comanche, kind of mixed in. Cool. Awesome. And there's no literal words at all. Yeah, it's an invention. Yeah, I just kind of wanted it to sound audibly similar. Yes.

That's all. Cool. Talk to me about this door situation. I mean, there's a 40-foot double door, two big 20-foot wide doors. How do you want to approach this? So, I mean, Four Bears is just going to kind of lean on the door and open it up, going out there shield first once we're all ready to go. That's sort of his intention. He's eager to go. And so he's standing right at the front there obviously kicking the door in is not

literally an option they're too big but if it can be opened he's going to push it open so talk to me about party order at the doors here who's opening the doors who's what well i imagine forebear is sort of eager to get in there and he's got the shield up front and he's you know he's kind of the big target so he's happy to stand right at the door, and he can't literally kick the door in, but he can open it and push through. That's kind of what I imagine is possible. Does that seem possible? Sure, sure.

It looks like it pushes in. Who's to your right, we'll say? I'd say Baron. Baron to the right, the forebear. Pembroke and Feyrozza, do you want to stand behind them? Yeah. So like a... Yep, behind.

A four, a little 10-foot square, as it were. And forebear opens the door. Into an enormous room. Oh, dear. into an enormous room. Oh, dear. This huge, spacious, incredibly spacious main chamber occupying the majority of this building. The floor is white stone inlaid with countless small colored tiles

forming a mosaic of an immense black fly with the symbol of a skull on its back. Ergo Soa. Unlike the other locales in the village, the walls here are draped in dark red velvet. Except for the double doors you just came in through, double doors directly across from you, and doors leading out. There's a series of steps along both sides of the north wall leading to a raised platform where a larger-than-life portrait hangs, depicting a beautiful nude woman who is skeletal from the waist down and brandishes a large scythe standing against the background of a moonlit starry night. Standing candelabras adjacent to the lowest steps illuminate the room. you see in the back of the room a large creature

seated behind the altar on a raised platform along the north wall. It's a woman. And though, Feyraz and Pembroke, you're in the back, it's a woman that you recognize. Uh-huh. Oh, naked from the waist up, with long strands of black hair

covering her bare breasts and pale blue skin. She's reading from a parchment in some ancient language that only sounds vaguely familiar to you, Feyraza, from where you are. It's like a... This, like, dissonant, weird chanting. She stops and rises to greet you. Welcome to my temple.

Oh, how I have longed for the company of humans. Now, don't get me wrong, the giants of Skirgard appreciate gluttony and the unadulterated joy that accompanies violence and dismemberment. But you see, they lack the sexual refinement of you small folk. Since the world was given to you on a silver platter, you have more time to hone your bodies for carnal pleasures. But look at me, going on and on. I know you are not here to be disciples, no

No, you are here on a mission, yes Some of you, some of you have come a long, long way to get here And you have caused quite a disturbance I applaud your efforts. Uratash did not deign to tell Onanthexia and Zoyabeta about you when he sent us the package, for he no doubt knew of your power and saw his fate crumble as your shadows grew larger. But Olenvexia told me of you and said you would come. I must admit

I was skeptical. But here you are. She's like licking her lips. Looking at you in a very strange way. I promise you this. Though today you will die in the presence of the Pallid Princess,

I promise to make good use of your bodies afterwards. And she eyes, forebears, some better use than others. Oh, servitors, join me! And to her left and her right, next to the candelabras, these two bodies, these like mummified giants, stand up and turn towards you, their flaps of skin hanging off and bits of wrappings just dangling from their bodies. Rover initiative! Oh, my God! Oh, this is messed up.

This is happening. I don't like this at all, at all, at all. Oh, this is so... Oh, my God. So uncomfortable right now. All right, it's been a little while. Been a minute since we've done the old niche. I almost forgot how it worked.

What do I add to my die roll? In your case, I'm sure it's 15 or 16. It's pretty decent. I rolled well when I needed to. Let's just go around the table, just for old time's sake. Anybody over 20? 23. Oh.

There you go, Faye. Don't ever call me that again. Well, you know, I might be a little over 20. At 33, Troy. Oh! Bam, bam, bam! Joe looked over while I was rolling initiative and just went, yeah, of course. Natural 20.

It's just exhausting. Pimps. Four. Oh, no. No, Pimps. And what about four bears? 18. 18 for four bears.

Get to see him in action for the first and probably last time. I'm not kidding. It's not impossible for him to have a one episode run. And I thought to myself, what if he ends up

dying? And I said, well, Joe put a lot of work into this guy, but that's the game. And if that happens, it's a real bummer. And I apologize. But let's just see. It's okay. I'm not worried about it. I'm not concerned about that happening.

But just be aware, no work will go into the next one. Just be aware. I appreciate that. I appreciate that. Spider. But anything at 11th level is so much work. I'm just going to be Seltiel, the iconic magus

at level 11. Just come in with Mauricio. Alright. Round one. Oh, feels good to say that again. Round one, we're going to go with Baron. You guys walk into this room. Baron, you are to the right

of, I was going to say Lork, but to the right of four bears. Directly behind you is Pembroke. To Pembroke's left is Feyraza. In front of Feyraza is four bears. About, oh, five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five feet away from Feyraza and four bears

is the first of these weird mummified giants. And then way up on the dais is this woman who, by the way, has a scepter in one hand and her other hand is one gigantic claw scythe.

Her hand is the scythe? Her hand is the scythe. Oh my god. That's gotta be difficult. Yeah. That's... That's gotta be difficult. That's a little difficult. Baron, you have the floor. You can come and fight us on our own ground, you used up hag.

And he pulls a scroll out from his pocket he picked up in Skirgard and says, I consecrate and says, I consecrate the ground within these bounds in the name of Toreg. And in a 20-foot radius, the ground is blessed with the power of Toreg. The spell blesses an area with positive energy.

Every undead creature entering a consecrated area suffers minor disruption, suffering a minus one penalty on attack rolls, damage rolls, and save. Undead cannot be created within the summoned or consecrated area. What's the name of the spell? Consecrate. It's level two. You skipped over something very important. The DC to resifts positive channeled energy.

Oh, you guys didn't skip over this. I skipped over the stuff that didn't matter. Yeah, that didn't matter. All right. We don't have it, Claire. All right. Now, that does not move with you, right? Nope, that's right in that area.

That's just right in that area, 20-foot radius. So if you guys move out of that radius, you lose that boost. Now, what if undead are in the radius? They start taking minuses to their rolls. Okay. But they can't be created in here, so if any more were to be summoned, we could be safe in here. And they don't take damage? No, they don't take damage.

It's just like a disadvantage. And this particular spell, it's a second level cleric spell, so I'm assuming it's on the Inquisitor list as well. It's on the Inquisitor list. And you don't even have to roll for this? You pass on? Well, according to Hero Lab, it was on the Inquisitor list. Okay, I'm looking at Paizo.com. Excuse me.

Yeah, I'm looking at Paizo.com, and it just says cleric, but they may not have the Inquisitor stuff on here yet. Okay, okay. So you're fine, but I'm looking at Paizo.com, and it just says cleric, but they may not have Inquisitor stuff on here yet. Okay, okay. So you're fine, but I'm asking, you don't have to roll on this scroll. Not on this one. And even if it was like a level three Inquisitor, but a level two cleric, I would make it on anything but a natural one. Consecrate. Very interesting.

Hold me to those minus ones, because you know I'll forget. And Baron also calls down a swift action. As a swift action, Baron calls down a judgment of sacred destruction to bring extra damage to his blows. And as a scroll disappears from his hand and you see a light emanate from it and surround all of us, he quick draws his pistol and says, Your move. Oh! I love it! But she is on the other side of

Four Bears, so he just points his gun at Four Bears and is like, your move. Four Bears is like, oh no! He puts it between your legs and says, love gun too, electric boogaloo. There we go. She holds her scepter aloft and just... How far away is she from you guys?

You're closer to the map, Joe. 50 to 55 feet. Roughly. From forebears. I had a bad feeling that when Grant said your move, it was her move. 50 to 55 feet? Yes. The woman in the back flies to her right.

So nearer to where you guys are. Like basically on your side of the room, but still up on that dais behind that mummified giant. And with a blast, a Perceptor just channels negative energy from really far away. Wow. Everybody roll a will save. Oh, no. Oh, dear. She doesn't happen to be a fey or a plant targeted. Get out of here with those Baroness questions.

Is it a spell or spell like ability? Is it? Is it? Is it mind-consuming? Pembroke, what'd you get? I got a 30. Whoa, 30? A well save. Holy shit.

That's my best save. That would be a pass. What about Feyraza? 22. 22 is a fail. Four bears. 23? That is a fail. Oh. Four bears. 23? That is a fail.

Oh, dear God. Baron? Seven on the die for a 19. Oh, no. But if it's against an ability that detects lies or force of truth, it's still a fail. It's still a fail. So that's going to be half damage, I believe, to Pembroke and full damage to the rest. Oh, I see a couple of sixes.

Not bad. 15 full, seven half. Okay. All right, not too bad. Negative energy damage. But still, that's to all of us. To all of you. And then one action just, boom, drains you of that energy.

Look. And it is now Farazza's turn. Farazza is going to cast Airwalk Communal. Oh. What? And all of us now gain the ability to walk through the air. Cool. Thank you.

Wow. Holy shit. So you just touched everybody, and they're all within reach. Yep. And now they can just walk on air Half speed to walk at a 45 degree angle up Wow Believe it or not

Do they have to walk on air? Can they continue to walk normally? Yeah You can walk on air as if it were normal ground Alright, so if you want to walk on air You're welcome to it I should tell you about the ceilings in this room now that you're all flying. Four feet high.

Four feet high ceiling. The ceilings are 25 feet high in this room. Cool. Are you moving at all, Farazza? Yes. Thank you for allowing me my move action. Well, I've been listening to some old episodes, and I know you get testy about this. Farazza will walk 15 feet up into the air Over the head of Four bearers

And Baron Do you want to stay within the range of the Consecrate? Perfect Yep I assume it's a 20 foot globe Well yeah It's just the ground It doesn't matter where we are

This is just the black and white but I should show you a picture Of her That is also the black and white, but I should show you a picture of her. That is also the exact pawn as well. I have it on the board. That is really cool. It kind of looks like Kerrigan from StarCraft. Yeah, totally.

She's wearing a skirt. She's kind of got that Angelina Jolie from Malevolent look to her. What was that movie? Malevolent or Malevolence? Maleficent. Maleficent. Maleficent. I didn't see it I didn't either

I don't apologize Alright It is now For the first time ever Making His Glass Cannon Podcast Combat Debut

Four Bears What is he? What is he? What you gonna do Four Bears? Four Bears is a An 11th level shaman. Oh!

Speaker for the past archetype. Oh, wow. So he is quite literally a spirit walker, basically. Spirit walker! He speaks for his ancestors, basically, is his thing. But his ancestors are very battle-hardened uh people and so that's where a lot of his bonuses are focused uh is is on battle so draws from their strength he draws from their strength from the from the very spirit realm they inhabit yes exactly

uh so we're seeing what's happening right now four Bears is going to take a move action and sheathe his mace. So he's kind of seeing the setup, the way it's happening now. This glowing circle of good comes around us. He's going to sheathe his mace. And then he says this incantation, waves his hand. And between the giants and her, this giant wall of fire cuts the room in between. And she's on the hot side. Oh, nice.

So she is cut off in a gout of flames that covers the... From the mummies. Yeah, between her and the mummies. Wow. Oh, you've cut her off from the mummies. Yes. Wow. Exactly.

You've left the mummies on their side. Yeah, they're welcome to come into our little ring here. Wow. All right. I love it. I love it. Very interesting. And that's a five foot, like, it takes up a five foot square and goes the length of the

room. Yep. It takes up a five foot square and goes, yeah, the width of the room. I'm drawing this shit, man. We got this beautiful map out. Let's draw this. Let's draw it, baby. It is an opaque sheet of flame up to 20 feet long per level.

So, you know, massive. It is five feet. Oh, sorry. I'm going to fire with a radius of up to five feet per two levels. Very interesting. So immediately, any creatures within 10 feet on the hot side where she is take 2d4 points of fire damage. Wow.

And there is no reflex save. So it's just straight, real quick, 2d4 points of fire damage. You have the honors. For her, five points of fire damage. Five points of fire damage. Please, you have the honors. For her, 5 points of fire damage. 5 points of fire damage. Okay. And then the other two each take 1d4 points of fire damage. They're on the cooler side of the wall.

So the one closest to us takes 3 points of fire, and the one farther away takes 4 points of fire. Nice. Oh, okay. That's awesome. Yes. Let's have this image of him waving his hand across them. I'm just picturing it's so cool.

Like after that scary speech and everything, and it's just like, how about a little fire scarecrow? Yes, exactly. I love it. I love it. Very, very cool. Well, you did leave these two temple servitors on the right side of the fire. Sorry, it deals double damage to undead. Oh!

Oh, okay. Double damage to undead. So she takes another four. The one closest to us takes another two, and the other one takes another two. Okay. Assuming they're all undead. Okay, well, you dealt a bit of a blow to these fellas. They are now going to go.

And, uh, first thing that's going to happen is this one that is standing nearest to you. It just, now that you've got a chance to really look at it, it is terrifying in its visions. You can't tell what kind of giant it was or if it even was a giant. If it maybe is some sort of necromantic neocraft like you saw they were trying to make with Orpheus. You don't even know. It's wrapped with all these bandages. Free action, it just enacts

its frightful presence. Everybody roll a will save. Alrighty. Natural 20. Oh, 90 tons of... 90 tons of... 90-19 for me.

90-19. All right, so Feyraza and Pembroke are okay. Baron, you look upset. Did you say will? Yes. I certainly did. 20. 20 total? Yeah. You're right. Did you say will? Yes. I certainly did. 20. 20 total?

Yeah. You're all right. Oh, yes. I was so scared after that, like, didn't pass after 23. These minions, though. These aren't, like, the boss. 21 for four bears. All right.

So you are all all right. Yes. You're all right. Awesome. Larissa. Okay. So this guy, he is not happy by this fire, so he is actually going to move away from the fire.

And then after, at the end of his movement, he's moving like right on top of this fly with the skull on. He's moving towards the skull right on the back of the fly. And when he finishes, it unravels some of its wrappings. Tanglings. And fires it directly at four bears. Oh, no. This is not a ranged attack.

This is, in fact, a CMB versus CMD. It tries to wrap you up with this shit. Oh, no. That's so bad. Sorry about your first episode there, four bears. Rap battle. Rap battle. Against CMD. Ooh Four Bears. Rap battle. Rap battle. Against CMD.

Ooh, 27. That hits. 27 hits. Did you take the minus one? Is he within range of the consecrated zone? Still hits. He is in the consecrated zone. Okay.

Should have rolled a barbarian. All right, so it wraps you up. You are grappled, and you take, oh, no, 19 points of damage as the wrappings tighten around you and just squeeze you. And you can feel them trying to pull you to the ground to pin and constrict you. The other one rushes up as well. The other one's on the other side of the room, so it's very limited in its movement. These are, you know, they don't move slow

like normal undead that you would think, just like lumbering zombies. But it moves relatively slow, and it grabs a chunk of the floor or like something laying around and just hucks it at Baron. It is, you know, obviously you're all mixed up in this and it does

not have a point blank shot or whatever it is. So that is going to be ooh! Natty 19. Oh no! So that is a 30 minus 4 is a 26 to hit.

Against my CMD or against my... No, it's just throwing a chunk of the room at you. Is it a giant subtype? It is. Well, that's a miss. Oh! Minus four for throwing into a group like that, right? Yeah, I should be a 29 against...

Wait, is it a minus four if you're throwing into a bunch of enemies? No, only if your ally is threatening. Yeah, I haven't used a range in so long, so 30. I'm rolling damage. Yeah, that's a hit. So it hits you for 22 points of damage from the force of whatever it just, like a

chunk of the candelabra just boom, hits Baron. We yeah, we should be adding our plus two to our saves. Yeah, I have been. I haven't. That's alright. Oh, for protection from evil. Yes. So these guys have come, they've packed a punch, and it

is now Pembroke's turn. Your new buddy Four Bears is locked up. Um, I'm gonna do a bunch of religion checks, first off. Okay. Uh, I'm gonna do a bunch of religion checks first off okay uh i'm gonna do religion checks on these two memory things like uh facing us right now okay uh 26 26 yeah that that'll that'll do these are some sort of strange uh mummified uh you look closely like they have to be frost giants mummified frost giants. With the 26, what do you want to learn specifically?

Any weaknesses. Vulnerable to fire. That firewall definitely hurt them. Cool, cool. Good to know. And you can get one more piece of information. And what are their turn-ons? They enjoy long walks on the beach

and men who aren't afraid to cry. Oh, fuck. I'm afraid to cry. Oh, fuck. I'm afraid to cry and I'm afraid of the water. And I would do a religion check on her. Okay. Let's see what... 22?

22? Yeah, yeah. I'll give you one chunky bit. You want to probably know what she's weak to, right? Yep, I would. You do not detect any sort of weakness from her. However, you know that whatever is going on with her claw carries with it great disease. Oh, okay. And then I just want to do a check on Ergothoa, like the symbol on the floor, just to see if there's anything useful I can glean from that. 21.

with the skeletal body and the big sight. If this is some sort of priestess of her or some sort of follower, it's very possible that this room itself is providing them with more power. Ah, okay. So this is sanctified in some way, the room. Yeah. Not that there's anything you can really do about that. Okay.

So I'm going to use the metamagic rod. Yeah. Not that there's anything you can really do about that. Okay. So I'm going to use the metamagic rod. Okay. And I'm going to put haste on all of us. First of all. Gonna need that. So, yeez. And then I'm going to cast a little spell I like to call fireball. Oh, yeah! Classic! And I'm going to

it's a 20 foot radius, so I'm going to, it's a 20-foot radius, so I'm going to try to catch the servitor closest to us and her in it. I don't think I can get the third one in there. Right, yeah, I think that is going to, I think that's going to work. Okay. Because you can just put it on a square, right? You can just make it explode, or does it have to hit something? No, no, I can just make it detonate wherever.

Yeah, no. That's going to work just fine, Pems. Okay. What is the save? That is a DC 19 reflex save. All right. The Servitor rolls and makes the save. I should have used that for her.

She's got a decent little reflex and fails her save. Okay. That's 10d6. That's 40 points of damage. Whoa! Nice. 40 points of damage. Fire damage, my friend.

Yeah, fire damage. Wow, so she takes all of that. As far as you know. As far as you know. And he takes 15, but is vulnerable to fire. Vulnerable. What'd you get 20 from? Half of 40.

Yeah, yeah. Wait, it was 40 total? Yeah. So that guy takes at least 20 points of damage from fire. You know they're weak to fire, so you know they took a little bit more. Yeah. Oh, man, if he had failed that, that would have been pretty bad news. Yeah. Oh, man. If he had failed that, that would have been pretty bad news. Yeah.

So Metamagic Rod, haste, then Fireball as your standard action. Do you want to do any type of movement? I'm going to stick right where I am. Stay right where you are. Okay. Round one has ended. That is round one. That's round one.

Everyone has taken damage. I've ended. And I yell out, like, as I'm doing this, everything that I learned about, you know. Excellent. Them being caught on fire. The bottom of the fire. That one does this. And this one does that.

Disease. Everyone has taken damage. You know a little bit more about them. Also, what about getting out of the room? I mean, you know, if we can, if we can move out of the room. I mean, isn't that something we want to do? I include that also. Yeah. I just want to make sure I was understanding what you said correctly.

Yeah, yeah. That would be an advantage, right? Yeah. To get out of the room? Possibly. Yeah. I mean, obviously, I'm not going anywhere, but... How high up is the wall of fire?

How high up is the ceiling? 25 feet high. Oh, then... Now, from the dais, though, the dais is 10 feet up So it's 15 feet from where she's standing to the ceiling Think about that as Baron takes his turn Well, I want you to think about this, Troy I don't like it I don't like it

Now, this is a scroll I picked up 20 feet high Okay, so it goes all the way to the ceiling So this is a scroll of consecrated pickup last time. So I don't understand. I'm kind of capita-causing this, okay? You know, there might be some things. Yeah, do you take offense to that?

I do take offense to that. You cannot consecrate an area with a similar fixture of a deity other than your own patron. So there's a fixture of Ergotho on the ground, right? Right. Instead, the consecrate spell curses the area cutting off its connection with the associated deity or power. Whoa, that changes everything, man. So there won't be negative ones to the rolls of anyone within this area. They will be cut off from the bonus power you set.

It's at the bottom of the Paizo.com. I see this. You cannot consecrate anyone within the picture. Instead, it curses the area, cutting off its connection. Holy shit. You should never have drawn that on the map. It's on

there. I have to include it. So if they were getting any bonuses, they're gone, but only in that area. Only anyone within 20 foot radius of where I cast. It's only one guy. One of the mummies. The one that was holding four bears Yes, I mean it's not holding you It detached that

It is completely free It just shot this thing at you And just wrapped you up Dude, it is very, very strongly wrapped around you And you feel it's pulling you towards the ground Well, was the two hit affected at all by its bonuses from the special place? No, it just sent it It's like a weird power it has.

It's like a... Oh, it's not even a... Okay. Yeah. Baron, what do you want to do? Baron's going to take a five-foot step to be adjacent to four bears and next to the door and then unleash a full-round attack action

against the mummy that is currently attacking four bears. All right, so you're just going to fire with your old... Flip, flip, flip, flip! Gunzo? And you know what he's going to do? What? He's going to get up close and gun zone? And you know what he's going to do? What? He's going to get up close and deadly on each one. Oh!

Misfire. Oh! Oh, my God. Second attack is a natural 20. Oh! All right, so did you quick clear or no? I didn't quick clear. All right, so natural 20.

Roll to confirm. 13 on the die. That is a total of a 25 to confirm. Yeah. Against Touch AC. And the final attack is a 13 against Touch AC. That is a hit. So you have a confirmed crit and another hit.

So let's start it in order. So even when I miss that. Wait, did you take your hasted attack? I was hasted? Yeah. Yeah, dude. Oh, well, shit. Be careful.

One more 17 on the attack Yeah Alright Let's walk through these First The first is the misfire Yes so what is the misfire

So that's 2d6 half Okay So that is 5 points of damage Okay The second attack is the crit So Question Is this a magical gun

Yeah Okay so it bypasses DR It's a plus 1 It bypasses DR magic is the crit. So, question, is this a magical gun? Yeah. Okay, so it bypasses DR. It's a plus one. It bypasses DR magic. If it's DR magic. Okay,

so five points of damage, okay. And then the next one, I think it's time to go to Joe O'Brien with a little fake critical. This one comes in from Jared T.

in Katy, Texas. Oh, yeah, I know Katy, Texas. That's where they have all the Airstreams, right? That's where they... That's where they're famous for having, like, Airstreams. Jared T. from Katy, Texas.

Han shot first. Yeah. Hold on. What? Are they undead? It doesn't matter. They're not immune to critics. They're not immune to critics?

No, no. Undead are... You catch the target completely by surprise. Double damage. So that's four times damage, right? Hell yeah. And plus 2d6 sneak attack damage. If you can already perform a sneak attack, the 2d6 is stacked on top of the sneak attack.

So that's 4d6 on top of 4d8. Plus, let me tell you what it's plus. Plus 60. Plus 60? Let me just calculate it out. Oh, man. Oh, man. You catch the target. It never saw a gun before.

Yeah. This undead mummy. Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop. Boom! 82 points. Holy shit. Oh, my gosh. It is currently still standing. Oh, wow. That's okay, because you got two more hits on it.

What a round, Grant! I would assume by the end of this, it will not be. Oh, man. All right. Two more hits. One more hit. No, the haste. That's right.

Yeah. All right. Roll your next damage. Max damage for 23 points of damage. Okay. And my up close and deadly. I said it would be on each shot, so I'm going to plus nine points of up close and deadly damage.

Still standing. Still standing. That was another 32. The final attack. Take it down, man. Is a total of 21 points of damage plus 8 points of damage. 29 points of damage. Is dead.

Yeah! You're goddamn right it is! Back to the grave with you! Back to the grave! Wow. I imagine four bears jumping out of his skin. He's all wrapped up in the skin and he just hears, Boo!

Boo! Boo! Boo! What is happening? jumping out of his skin. He's all wrapped up in the skin, and then he just hears, boom, boom, boom, boom! He's just like, what is happening? What was that? You know, I don't see anything on here that says that those wrappings are going to stay effective if the creature that sent the wrappings...

They just fall limply to the ground. Yeah, is it a spell-like ability? Yeah, it's a supernatural ability. So I would assume the wrappings... blah, blah, blah, blah, they turn to dust if the mummy is destroyed. There we go. It says it! Oh, my God! So if Baron kills it, these things that are about to pull you to the ground just turn to dust.

Four bears. Awesome. It has a new best friend. Yeah. And the best part about it is you thought I used four points of grit, but with the death of the mummy, I only used three. Yeah. There you go.

You sank my battleship. Nice job, and thank you. Okay. All right. Jared T. from Katy, Texas. Katy, that's a good one. I like that. Haunt shot first.

I see how this is going to be. That's fair. That's fair, Baron. It's a fair move. Turnabout is fair play. Okay. Well, it is her turn. And I'm mad.

You know what? I didn't even roll the 2d6 worth of Bane on each attack I have against Giants, so consider yourself stupid. That could have affected, because you could have... It doesn't matter. It's all fun. Rule of fun. Fuck you, bitch. That could have affected us. You could have... Oh, no. It doesn't matter. It's all fun. Real fun.

Fuck you, Baron. It's not the first time you've said that. It's her turn. 98 points of damage. She flies directly through the flame. Roll your damage. She doesn't care. She don't give a shit.

It seems like Troy doesn't really care. How much fire damage? That is 36 points of fire damage. Not a whole lot for her, though. Really? Really? She calls up. She's up in the air flying now near you all.

And she just calls up this dark, dark, evil, unholy feeling. Yeah. Throughout all of you. You all feel like the sickness you felt when you came into that room And saw that dude eating the entrails And then out came Orphos And you had to fight and kill him And watch Lork die No, no, this is much, much worse

This is the power of Urgothoa This is sex and violence And dismemberment and cannibalism All rolled up to one And you feel it inside of you So are rated. Everyone roll a will save. Don't forget your protection from evil.

I know what this is. Baron's going to turn in his bottle cap. Oh, roll twice. Take the better. Good time. He just threw it right in your face because I disrespect you. This I know for a fact is an Ithaca bottle cap that you just took off of your beard. Alright,

Pembroke, I'm hearing a fail. 21. 21? What'd you get, Feyrasa? 22. What did you get, Fourbears? 24. And what did you get, Baron? You said a will save? Always. That sounds like a 14.

Always a question Yes he said we'll see We're talking 25 25 We'll see you next week Oh no No This is the first time I've actually hated him

I refuse Such poor shit Oh my god I hate him The first time I've actually hated him. I refuse. Such poor shit. Oh my God, I hate you. I hate you so much. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Glass Cannon Network production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission. you