The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 200 Part 3 - Viva Lost Magus
Episode Date: March 26, 2019The past and the present collide as the #Marchto200 reaches its conclusion. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today... at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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while we were wrapping up part two we heard a very rudely i might add very rudely we were wrapping up part two, we heard a... Very rudely, I might add.
Very rudely.
We were wrapping it up rudely?
No, no.
Well, the thing that happened...
What I'm about to say was rude.
Yes.
There was a buzz at our door, and it's very late at night here in New York City, so we
assumed murderer.
Right.
But what murderer rings the bell?
So we barred the door.
No, we've already had several criminals patrolling the halls.
Yes.
Which you never really explained what happened.
And we just let everybody in.
People just walk in sometimes.
That's true.
It's very frightening.
But we answered it, and it was a delivery.
Yes?
Yes.
And this is after 11 o'clock at night.
How would you describe this?
It is a golden foiled uh gift
bottle of what appears to be liquor or champagne or something this could be ketchup yeah it could
oh my god a bottle of louis trez so nice is there a name a tag or anything uh no there's no name or
tag or anything but skid picked up the delivery and said a name. While we were recording, a certain member of our extended family, Nick Lowe, texted me and he said,
I want to send you guys something.
Why don't I interrupt your recording?
I was like, no, the show isn't that important.
Go ahead and send it.
So here we go.
Nick Lowe.
So we're going to try calling Nick.
Oh, hello, Nick.
Oh, there he is. Hi, Nick. Hey, Su is hi nick hey good buddy how you guys doing we're doing
great man we just got this wonderful gift we haven't opened it yet we're gonna we're gonna
open it live on uh on air we're in part three of episode two hondo oh my spoiler alert bro he listens to this shit
twice oh it's not champagne so this is gonna get ugly oh god we have like a lot of work
seven oh dear what is it what is it oh my god it is widow jane oh no a spectacular bourbon
like a really spectacular bourbon.
Nick, what are you drinking right now?
I am drinking some Michners right now.
Oh, the first American distillery.
Also, also, I'm sitting on Uncle Joey's bed.
That's true.
That's where I sleep at night.
When we record late, Joe goes and sleeps on Nick's couch.
When my wife's angry at me, I sleep in Uncle Joey's bed.
I leave the state.
It's true.
I sleep in another state.
How's it going, guys?
How's it going?
I can't wait to hear it.
It's going great, buddy.
We're having a great time.
And now this is going to take it to a whole new level.
I'm not spoiling anything for you dude you need to you need to be kept in the dark uh
until until release but we we really appreciate the gift thank you so much thank you nick thanks
nick i had no idea they delivered liquor this late this is amazing yeah love you guys congratulations
gcp forever can't wait for episode 300. The March to 300 starts now.
Yeah.
Why are you doing this to me?
Shut up, Matthew.
We love you, Nick.
Give us a little Joe's gonna roll to take us out.
Joe's gonna roll.
Joe's gonna roll.
Get ready for that wall.
Yeah.
Thank you, Nick.
Thank you, guys.
You're the best, buddy. Love you, buddy. Bye, guys. Cheers. Thank you, Nick. Thank you, guys. You're the best, buddy.
Love you, buddy.
Bye, guys.
Cheers.
Take it easy.
Let's pour that shit around.
You realize this is really good, right?
No, I don't know the Widow Jane.
The Widow Jane is really good stuff.
Nick's got great taste.
He's a classy guy.
He's a class act.
Joe, could you fill that up about halfway?
It's a water bottle.
It is a running water bottle. It's a sports bottle. You just put you fill that up about halfway? It's a water bottle. It is a running water bottle.
It's a sports bottle.
You just put it up.
I put marathon runners.
That's about 375 milliliters.
Just, that's about half.
Just go half.
I want 375 neat.
I know some people ask for three fingers.
I ask for 375.
The sad thing is that bottle will be three quarters gone by the end of the night.
So sad.
It's like not even joking.
Well, yeah, I'm really excited for this part
i gotta say i just want a tiny bit because i just a taste i gotta drive this boat you gotta work uh
so i while you're pouring i want i want to jump right back into the story again
there's just no time we've got to keep this episode 200 train moving on the tracks it has gone a little off track here
and there but that's that's part of this game um that's part of our life that's part of who we are
yeah that's what we do it's kind of what we do that's our mission statement
going off track since 2015. The Glass Cannon Podcast.
We ended part two with, you know,
the sort of, you could call it a hand-waving,
but more of the like,
you guys are making your way to Highbury, and now we see that Silvermane foresaw this
or knew that there was going to be a plan in motion.
He met with Kaurian Blex, met with the Knights of Ozem,
and discussed how to handle this.
And the Knights of Ozem, being the badasses that they are,
said, this is how it's going to go down.
So now you go through the eastern courtyard.
You come to that gate, and you hope against hope
that those two guards that are still loyal to Sophia and Emmett will let you in.
Jimmer, Adriel, Metra, and Silvermane slash Silvertusk.
What a party!
What time of day is it?
Is it night?
Is it day?
What are we doing?
It is 7 p.m.
You know what time it is always with these four characters?
Party time. Let's get going.
Hey!
So it's the crepuscular time.
Joe has literally left the table every single
part. He's just packing
shirts into a bag.
It's just episode 200.
I got a quick getaway.
I got my pajamas.
His dop kit is sitting strewn across the floor
shaving cream all over.
I tried to hide. I tried to be clever and hide my mini so nobody knew I was playing Silvermane.
And now I can't find it.
You can't find it.
So you thought it was in your bag?
Well, I thought I put it in my bag.
It was right next to me.
Now I lost my Silvermane mini.
I put mine in my dice tray.
Underneath a die.
You're very smart, Matthew.
underneath a die.
You're very smart, Matthew.
Well, you guys are out, you know,
a few feet away from this door that Blix told you about.
Their inside intel, their people on the inside said,
come to this door.
What do you guys do?
Oh, my gosh.
We're already there.
So, I mean, what do you guys do?
Like, what are your classes
surely we would have shared i feel like at this point we've been traveling for weeks you know
what joe i feel like our characters would know this by this point so why would we waste time
role playing that's true we shouldn't role play we should just tell each other just tell each other
so that i know so that i know who's best suited to open the door are you a druid i am a druid
yes i'm a druid with a one level dip in ranger
the tip of the cap tip of the cap a wag of the finger mr iron tusk yes uh a druid with a dip
in ranger yes and Mute Druid also.
How does that work with verbal components of spells?
So the way that I've decided to play it is, in classic Joe O'Brien fashion, which is, you know, gimping my character because it's fun for me.
Oh, Lord.
Is that he has the Silent Spell feat.
And he prepares all of his spells as such so everything is one level higher everything is one level lower wow so it's not even gimping yourself it's just
that's how the rules work right yeah that is how the rules work and so instead of playing him as
like a non-caster based druid which like i could have done i was just like no fuck it i will have him one
level lower for everything and he doesn't have an animal companion uh actually he does he uh but he
he does and he doesn't uh and this came in ultimate magic he has a familiar he has an arcane familiar
that is a hawk and this is part of the way that he was able to uh confirm with intel that sir will
was in these dungeons as he has a hawk familiar.
So it's not an animal companion.
It is a familiar.
It's a new thing that they came up with where you take a –
so when you build a druid, you can take an animal companion
or a domain, like a cleric domain.
This allows you to take a cleric domain and you get an arcane familiar.
It's a new thing
can you see through their eyes can you communicate with them yeah it's all the same rules of an arc
awesome familiar if they're closer to you you get i get a little buff to my perception with the hawk
so it's it's perception based and now all of my it's the eagle domain so all of my domain spells
are like flight based and stuff like that so interesting yeah cool yeah metro fun metro is a
sorcerer full-on sorcerer the first that we've seen among playable characters across all our pods
oh really yep and that is a core class core class that's not true He texted Bob Obzu some ass. Oh, right. He wrote about Jemash. That's right.
Fan favorite.
That's right.
Only because of the name.
Yes.
I did lie, yes.
But this is big.
And this is high level Sorcerer.
High level Sorcerer.
Not first level.
She's pretty badass.
Jimmer.
What's Jimmer's last name?
Jimmer Hardy.
Who's he played by, by the way?
You know, actually, I have not cast him uh there's definitely
some tim blake nelson in there but physically that's not quite right um so i'm open to
suggestions if anyone uh what's the name of the dude from uh justified who's kind of like
i wondered if someone would say timothy oliphant no no no walton goggins yeah walton goggins there
we go all right yeah nailed itton Goggins. Nailed it.
I love him.
Did you watch Vice Principals?
Yes.
Yes.
He is so good.
He is so good at that.
When he opens a fridge and it's all full of LaCroix, I just lost my mind.
But yeah, that's great.
And he is a classic sword and board fighter of the weapon master archetype.
Isn't that another class that we've never had?
What is your fighter?
What is Keith Slashmaster?
What's his face from that one-off?
Yeah, the one-off we did for the first
GCP Live was a fighter.
But I mean, we're
really have to dig deep.
Yeah, Siggy Seven Ales.
Siggy Seven Ales. So, wow, weapon master. guy but i mean we're talking we're really have to dig deep yeah sig siggy seven ales siggy seven
ales all right uh so wow weapon master uh i don't even know what's going on with that oh man and he
has a really cool sword by the way it's got a tiger's hilt right yes oh that's on the pommel
uh now do you guys know what adriel is adriel ashpeak? I have no idea. An oracle. Yeah, that's what I guessed too. They call Adriel the oracular spectacular.
13 levels of beautiful, beautiful, gorgeous oracle.
And I only know that because you said to Droja and whatever, Kretz...
Not Kretzka.
Ketrezra.
Ketrezra.
The mysteries.
Yep.
Yeah.
You're like, this is a mystery.
Bottle cap. Bottle. That's good. We like this mystery bottle cap bottle that's good you
got a grant bottle cap another one very useless thank you grant this is useless smiling with like
a rights restricted register thing and underneath it just says it's useless it looks like bob's big
boy yeah use this in my reign of winter campaign it'll happen it'll happen no It'll happen. No cash value. One day. No cash value. One day, that Reign of Winter campaign.
One day.
We've got a druid, one level dip in ranger, a sorcerer, a straight up weapon master fighter,
and an oracle.
Oh, this is so awesome.
Standing outside the door.
That's exactly what you want for someone to infiltrate a castle.
That's right.
You want three casters and a fighter.
Exactly.
Exactly. I think I may have the worst stealth that's ever
been on this entire show, by the way. I'm excited
to unveil it. You know what, Grant?
That won't be a problem.
Okay. She works in the shadows.
I work in the shadows.
If Kaurian and the Knights of Ozem
plan works,
you have got here unmolested
and no one to your knowledge has seen
you come to this gate.
So you get there and you're hoping
that these guards
didn't get found out.
And so you wait.
You knock.
First, come close.
Was there a signal?
Come close.
And can any of you see in the dark?
Silvermane shakes his head.
I have darkvision.
I'm capable of seeing at least with a dim light source.
Excellent.
No, I can't.
I'm fairly skilled at fighting in the dark, but I can't actually see in it.
Metro will reach out and give both Jimimmer and silvermane uh dark vision
oh just drop some dark vision hell yeah just giving it out like rations
rations awesome nice that will last for 13 hours oh nice okay Well, hopefully we get him in 13 hours.
17 hours later.
It's deep, deep into the morning. Do we have a code word or something?
You know, the minute she casts that,
you can see very clearly around you
everything in the darkness in black and white.
Now, it's still twilight.
The sun hasn't completely set.
You get to the door.
What do you do?
Silverman will test the door.
They said it was going to be unlocked
with Iomedae willing.
You test the door, and the door is locked.
He's going to look around and knock.
Do, do do do.
Oh no.
Door opens.
And there are two guards there.
The guards
have swords
at the ready.
And shields with the symbol
of Highbury. But the symbol of Highbury.
But the symbol of Highbury has been painted over.
The griffins are scratched out and what's left you can't even see.
Gross.
Gross.
That's so offensive.
I know.
It's like, have some self-respect.
And they just look at all of you and say,
For I am a day.
Silvermane nods.
Seriously.
They push open the door,
look at all of you and say, good luck.
And then they take off.
Oh my god, they were terrified to stay there.
Like two guards gone.
You guys slip in to the castle, shut the door behind you.
Oh, my God.
It's just pure darkness in this dungeon.
You see maybe 70, 80 feet up ahead a torch on the wall,
and then it's another 80 to 100 feet before another torch.
So it's kind of hard to see if anyone else is around.
Those guards obviously ran off pretty quickly.
I don't know if they were running from something
or just running from this place in general.
Up ahead towards the left
are cells that
look like they just stretch
the whole length of this corridor to the right.
A wall that has
sort of water condensed
on it from being deep, deep
below the castle.
What do you do?
You do a perception
check?
Sure. what do you do you do a perception check sure 27 natural 20 34 that's a good start 35 oh grant uh not as good as those three
all right so with the exception of Adriel, you all don't hear anything or see anything.
And you said it's dark, right?
Dark.
Down the length of this corridor.
Obviously, you can only see as far as 60 feet, but you don't hear a sound.
Point of order.
Metra can see 120 feet in the dark.
Oh, that is cool. Point taken.
Metra doesn't see anything.
She still sees nothing. She sees more
nothing. She sees even more nothing.
Double the nothing the rest of us do.
It seems to be
empty. Silvermane will
lead the way now. Great.
Silvermane starts walking down.
Oh, by the way, I should say Silvermane is he the way now. Great. Silvermane starts walking down. Oh, by the way, I should say Silvermane is, he's not like robed.
He's wearing like a breastplate of ironwood.
Oh, yeah.
I was going to ask.
He's wearing a breastplate of ironwood and he's got a bow.
Oh.
Sort of like leading the way.
A black hour longbow?
Similar.
Similar.
Yes.
But a little different.
Hold one moment.
Silverman, Gemma.
He's going to...
Adriel's going to do a quick spellcraft on their armor.
Okay, that's...
It's all right.
It's a 32.
What are they wearing?
I wonder why he did that.
Oh, shit!
What are...
Well...
What are you wearing?
What are you wielding?
What are you wearing?
Just wearing. Just wearing. I just want to know the armor. Silverman, Silverman, Silverman, what are you wearing tonight? Who are you wearing? While are you wearing? Just wearing.
Just wearing.
I just want to know the armor.
Submarine, Submarine, Submarine, what are you wearing tonight?
Who are you wearing?
While you infiltrate the castle.
Have fun storming the castle.
What are you wearing?
Well, I am wearing plus five light fortification agile half plate.
Oh!
Yes.
And
a
and it's all battered.
It's just like
kind of like
it's weathered.
It's seen some shit.
It used to be more agile.
I'm sure it looks real shitty.
And
and a shield
a heavy steel shield
that is a plus three
arrow deflection shield.
I don't even want to know what your AC is.
This is sick.
That's so amazing. It's quite high.
Silver mane is wearing plus
four ironwood breastplate.
That's it? That's it.
Alright, let's roll that over
to Droja. I'm Metro.
Metro, whatever your name is. I don't care.
I'm not wearing any armor at all
okay i'm just wearing my inky cloak well i can't help any of you and uh sorry to interrupt um let's
continue i think you may have spent more than half of your starting wealth on your armors but that's
fine six guards set upon you oh no while you're spellcrafting your allies' armor. Now.
In the dungeon.
Yeah.
Not during the two-week
Yeah, several weeks.
During the two-week trip.
Wait, wait, wait.
Not during the epic
music portion of
Last of Us.
Hold on.
Cowrian speaks.
I'm a total procrastinator.
I'm so sorry.
You see Adriel
spellcrafting their armor.
Adriel, though,
is going to
reach into his bag
of holding,
pull out a
metamagic rod extend regular and cast magic vestment on himself.
Very cool.
So he gets a nice little plus two bonus on top of his plus one armor.
How long does that last?
24 hours.
You should just wake up every morning and boop.
Got to get my magic vestments on.
A little stretch, drink a little Sanka.
Spoop, boop. Gotta get my magic vestments on. A little stretch, drink a little Sanka. Spoop, spoop.
You walk along.
Cell after cell
after cell.
Completely empty.
All of a sudden,
you hear a noise up ahead.
The shuffling of feet.
Metro, you see
before any of them see
a guard.
And she reaches out
and stills everybody.
We hold.
Guard walks
a little bit closer to you.
Looks left.
Looks right.
Walks back.
Disappears around a corner.
Alright.
We continue moving forward.
More empty cells.
They're...
sad.
It's just a slab sticking out of the wall.
Some have manacles.
A bucket.
And then finally,
after empty cell after empty cell, you see one with a person
in it. A young halfling, chained to the wall, filthy. And Silvermane, even though this halfling
has seen better days and has got a long, dirty beard and shaggy hair. You know it to be Sir Willemette Keswick.
Wow.
He's almost stunned for a second,
overcome that he's actually here,
that he's actually about.
He's back in the saddle.
Yeah, to take this advantage away from Brander.
Whatever it is he's got going on,
to take it back.
Cell's locked, I'm assuming.
Is there any way to get through
it? I mean, is there...
It's pretty heavily locked.
Without
the key, you either have to force your way
in or use some sort of magic.
I have an idea.
You said it's in darkness, right?
It is darkness, and Sir Will is chained as well.
So I can...
Now, I have no ability to unlock the shackles.
Does anyone have any kind of magic or technical ability that would be helpful there?
Nope.
A knock spell, for instance?
No.
Boy, we came for this adventure unprepared.
The one thing we needed.
I know.
It's like, well, we're stumped.
Sorry, Sir Will.
I can cast heat metal on his shackles and burn his arms up.
All right.
We have a last resort.
See?
Free.
Life free of hands.
I can get all of us into the cell if we want.
Right, but we need the key to unlock the manacles.
I mean, can we break the center of the manacles
so he kind of walks around with, like,
still shackled on either side, but his arms aren't bent?
Yeah, I mean, I'm sure that...
Jimmer?
Yeah, that Jimmer can break the shackles.
Yeah. Break DC. I the shackles. Yeah.
Break DC.
I can certainly try.
All right.
So what do you think of Medra?
So I have...
So as a fetchling,
I have the shadow...
As one of my racial abilities,
I can shadow walk.
Damn, fetchling!
And I'm also an umbral escort,
so I do not have...
Those abilities are not limited to just me.
I've seen your work
in the back of the Village Voice.
Oh, my God.
Holy shit.
That was good.
Why is Troy picking up a Village Voice every weekend?
We've had two very inside New York Joneses.
He just really loves the arts and culture section.
R.I.P.
The Village Voice.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
So sad.
So, yes.
So, I'll take Jimmer in with me
and leave you guys
to guard our back.
Yeah, Silvermane
is going to keep an eye out
for the guards.
And so, what do you do?
It's like...
So, it's a shadow walk.
So, basically,
because you said it was darkness,
as long as there's dim light,
I can kind of basically
dimension door. You and Jim are just on the other side that is awesome it's like
we i don't know what i picture it's like we kind of slip into the shadows and then slip out again
in the cell right like dip in dip out and you're standing there in front of him and after a moment
he just kind of like weakly starts to lift his head
up and he
sees you but he doesn't know if you're friend or
foe. You can tell like he's in really bad shape
and his head just collapses
back down. And Metra
says, I'm Metra Nahn.
We're here to rescue you.
That's
so awesome. Pretty short for a sorcerer.
And then she kind of lifts up his chin.
Look at me.
You might know my daughter.
Della.
Della Narn.
Does Sir Will say anything?
No, he just looks at her, but his eyes widen a little bit.
You can tell that there's recognition there,
and he's trying to speak, but he's got nothing.
So devoid of energy.
You wonder if you pull the manacles off if he could even stand.
All right.
I have no magical ability to get this out,
so I guess we're forcing the...
Yeah, I take a look at the chains themselves. are they just made of normal metal like mundane yeah the chains is probably
your best bet you'd leave the shackles on them and just you can take those chains out pretty
easily just have to worry about the noise yeah so um jimmer like actually i do have a way
to get these shackles off it is very very expensive spell-wise, though. Don't worry about it.
Okay.
But what was it going to be?
I was going to disintegrate them.
That is way too expensive.
Talk about overspending.
It's like, man, I like my sandwich cut at a diagonal angle.
Hold on.
I'll do it.
I mean, the other option is if I shadow walk him,
do we need to?
Will the manacles just kind of drop there?
I think they would count as part of what he's wearing.
Yeah I feel like Jimmer's got a good idea.
So Jimmer
like quietly
draws his
long sword from its sheath
and you can see that there are some Thassilonian runes
along its edge, along the flat of its blade.
My God.
And he pulls it out and he says,
I try to stay still, son.
And he swings down at the chains and tries to cut through.
AC5, just don't roll a natural. Okay. He swings down at the chains and tries to cut through. AC five.
Just don't roll a natural.
Okay.
12.
Natty 12.
Natty 12.
Yeah.
I mean, this is nothing.
It's like slicing through butter to you.
Sheer through both chains, and he just collapses to the ground.
Yeah.
Hits his head and bleeds out.
No, no, no.
We'll see it next time.
Yeah, no, he just kind of slumps over.
I'm sure Metra's there to kind of brace his fall.
He's very weak.
Can barely, can't even stand.
And he's soiled like he's filthy.
They've just left him to rot,
but you can tell that they've like, they've done everything they can to make sure like he's filthy. They've just left him to rot, but you can tell that they've done everything they can
to make sure that he stays alive.
Don't worry.
To the brink of life.
Bring him to me.
I can heal him.
Please.
What?
So was our plan to go out the way we came?
That was the plan that Calrion said.
Get in.
Get out that way.
Yeah.
Okay, so I cannot shadow walk us out However, I can dimension door us out
So I will grab Jimmer
Holding Sir Will to me
I'll dimension door us right outside the cell
Sir Will is willing
Oh, good
Just want to make sure
He has Stockholm Syndrome
No, please, help, gods, help I've grown to love my medicals And Metro Oh good Just want to make sure No he has Stockholm Syndrome So no please Help
God
Help
I've grown to love my medicals
And Metro will
God
Steve
Steve
Metro will kind of pass him
To Ariel
Oh my child
Adriel right
Adriel
Adriel
Look at this stuff
What have they done to you
Isn't it neat
Shut up
Oh I can't believe That they had taken a Ally of the other ash pig Look at this stuff. What have they done to you? Isn't it neat? Shut up.
Oh, I can't believe that they had taken an ally of the other Ashpeak and done this to him.
Please, look into the inferno.
And his eyes lose.
Jesus, this guy is so creepy.
And he looks into him.
And from the power within him, you kind of see soot.
You kind of smell, like, smoke or or brimstone like after Nightcrawler
like teleports into the room next to you.
Yes, yes.
And, uh,
but it's not a bad smell.
It's kind of like burnt toast
if you want burnt toast that morning.
And you feel this positive energy go through you.
You are healed for 120 points of healing.
130 points of healing.
Oh my god.
Immediately.
Are you kidding me?
Oh my god! It ends all of the following
adverse conditions. Ability damage,
blinded, deafened, confused,
dazed, dazzled, deafened,
diseased, exhausted, fatigued,
feeble-minded, insanity,
nauseated, poisoned, sickened, and stunned.
Deafened twice, too.
I know.
Feeble-minded?
Feeble-minded? You could have just you could have just cured we didn't have time i didn't have time to explain well we never told him it was people
mine it could have been like had a scroll of permanency yeah we didn't know if we just
sir will is like in in a moment how long is the casting time on that just for shits and gigs? It is...
The duration is instantaneous.
It's such a...
It's one round.
One action.
What is that spell? It's called Heal.
Oh, no.
It's the best spell we have.
That's the kind of spell that would
save a Galabras.
Yes.
Sir Will is just immediately brought back,
and he is like, in shock.
He's got a long, bushy beard, long hair.
He does not look like the Sir Will that our listeners
and that you guys have come to know.
He is emaciated and gross.
He's not wearing any armor.
He doesn't have any weapons or anything,
but he is able to stand on his own power.
What does he do?
I mean, his memory is
intact, at least, and especially
from a few moments ago. So he's just like,
Metronon,
you are
Della's mother?
Yes, and I want to know everything.
Everything that happened to her.
But first, we must get to safety. Yes, I would be happy to, and I want to know everything. Everything that happened to her. But first, we must get to safety.
Yes, I would be happy to, but I'm...
I'm concerned about what's happening here at Highbury.
My mother, my father.
I don't know what has become of them.
Is there any way...
Do you know? Have you...
There are forces.
Have you found anything out?
And his eyes widen, of course, when he sees Silvermane.
I mean, he recognizes Silvermane.
Yeah.
You know, his eyes widen. Silvermane sees silvermane i mean he recognizes silvermane you know his his eyes widen silvermane has actually like a chalk board with him that he oh he does yeah that he would write you know pertinent we talked about that was that was
that part of his deal when before was that was that did we say no that was not part of his deal
before but in my research that's's in Pathfinder rules.
It's like for a mute character, there's chalk and chalkboards.
I thought maybe I'm... I thought like in earlier episodes we had mentioned this.
It's very possible.
We make up a lot of this stuff.
He was doing hand signals to Halgra before.
But yeah, so anyway.
He has this chalkboard and he just writes on it quickly.
No time.
Must go.
Yeah, for sure.
That's all he writes, and Sir Will is going to follow your lead there, Metra.
Everybody roll a perception check.
26.
Is it involving humans?
Natural 20.
Another natural 20.
Oh, my God.
34.
Save him.
29.
All right, so.
46.
46.
46. 46.
So, Silvermane, you hear it immediately, followed by Metra.
The way you came, someone is running towards you from that door,
from the direction of the door that you came in through.
So, Silvermane is going to, like, tap, tap, tap, tap both Metra and Jimmers really quick.
Jimmer or just... Jimmer. Jimmer really quick. Can I call you Jimmer? Yeah, both Metra and Jimmer's really quick. Jimmer or just?
Jimmer.
Jimmer, really quick.
Can I call you Jimmer?
Yeah.
Can I call you Jimmer?
And point to the other end of the hallway and pull out his bow.
So he's letting them know both it's coming from that way and I'm arming myself.
There's something dangerous happening.
Metra will step in front of Sir Will and be ready to cast.
And you just hear.
And then one of the guards that let you in
collapses in front of you.
Oh, no.
He's covered, like his face is covered in blood.
And he's, like, gasping for air.
What do you do?
We'll run to him.
Silverman will run to him.
They know.
Oh, I fucking knew him. They know. Oh, I fucking knew it.
They know.
They killed the other god.
You cannot go out that way.
They have their army down the end of the hallway.
The winding staircase.
It's the only way.
If the knights can secure the front,
you can get out that way.
I know it.
I know the staircase of which he speaks.
Willow go up and kneel next to him. He knows
this guard and he
runs his hands through his hair
and leans down. I'm so
sorry. Kisses him on
the head gently. It's this way.
And he points toward the
stairwell he's talking about.
Gah!
Army!
It is Army, it is... Army, it is, and then nothing.
Adriel's going to reach out and cast Breath of Life on him.
He's dead. He's gone. He's long gone.
It's too late. It's far too late.
All right, I'm going to keep that spell slot.
I'm not going to waste it.
Oh, wait, it worked.
Oh, wait, real.
Yeah, he died.
Okay.
Can I keep that spell slot?
Yeah, keep that spell slot.
Thank you.
Yeah, no, you failed and lost the spell.
Concentration check.
Just one moment too late.
So he just collapses.
For flavor's sake, I let him tell you what he knew.
Army.
Army at the door.
Army at the door.
Army at the door.
The army is something.
And then you have to take the spiral staircase.
I just assumed that Sir Will knew what that meant.
Yeah, I mean, you would know.
It's his home.
He probably spent time walking around the dungeons as a child.
You asked, Mother, show me the dungeons.
It's like the crypts in Winterfell.
Yes.
Exactly.
Exactly.
Spiral staircase makes me think of Verasma with the spiral of bones.
It's also a very efficient way to build a staircase.
Sure.
I used to have a spiral staircase in an apartment.
See how Matthew just
smacked Grant down there?
Grant had a really cool idea, Pathfinder.
He was like, shut up!
I understand why Troy just hates him so much as well.
All the 200 stuff,
the 50.
He takes everything great
and spits in it.
Troy, would you like a Sour Patch Kid?
No.
He was torn for a second.
He was torn.
He was.
All right, I'll have one.
Oh, man.
All right.
Episode 200's off the rails.
Watermelon flavored.
What do you guys do?
Joe's very nervous.
I'm not going to give it right back.
I know.
I want it right back.
No, no, no.
Don't take more than two.
It's so delicious.
Should we have Will guide us to the staircase?
Yeah, Will will show you the other way.
Will is just wearing, like, rags at this point.
Oh, yeah, rags, yeah.
But Silvermane is going to stop for a second, just a moment,
and he's going to do a series of motions
with his hand. You're not quite sure
what he's doing, and he reaches
out, Metra, and touches you.
And he's going to
cast a spell on you. And honestly,
with him being mute, you wouldn't know what it is.
I'm not willing. He casts a spell on you!
He casts a spell on you.
And you...
I don't know.
Maybe you could do Knowledge Arcana, but, you know.
I can do Knowledge Arcana.
Counterspell.
Counterspell.
Counterspell.
Counterspell.
That is a 24 Knowledge Arcana.
Nope, 25.
It is a... It's a spell called Death Ward.
Oh, nice.
So it is a protection spell to prevent death effects from happening to you, various death effects.
It gives you a bonus to your fortitude saves, basically, for that sort of thing.
Excellent. Thank you.
So, yeah, he casts that on you.
Thank you, Silverman.
And then, yeah, we'll keep going.
We'll keep following Will.
All right, so Sir Will has his strength,
but he's not armed and he's not armored.
Um, but he knows the way,
so he moves forward and leads to the end of the hall.
Um, you walk past where you, Metra,
saw that guard dip around the hall.
I'm sure you guys are cautious,
and you slip past and don't see him.
You can tell this dungeon goes on
for a while.
You get to the winding staircase and
I'm assuming
you go up and you just keep
going up and up and up.
So even though you entered through a courtyard
at the ground level, you can tell that
you are traveling now
deep up into the castle that the
dungeon truly is well beneath where most of the uh day-to-day activity of the castle takes place
so you keep going and you're going for a long time until finally it lets off in a large room
before continuing upward even further
we've been using roll 20 for so long before continuing upward even further.
We've been using Roll20 for so long.
We have, we have.
I feel like we need to go back to an old school map.
Oh, yeah, all right.
Get a ticket to the map.
Get a ticket to the map.
Get a ticket to the map.
Get up.
Get on up. Oh, wow.
Oh.
Those look like cinnamon buns, not spiral staircases.
Troy, you're a delight.
Please place yourselves on the map.
Oh.
Oh, here, the spiral staircase closest to Matthew and Joe.
Okay.
It looks like we're coming up into the side of a room. So, uh, Jimmer, um, I see that you have incredible combat prowess,
even with the way you attack the ravines and valleys and rivers and streams that we cross to get here.
Would you like to go first?
I'm just assuming I can also go.
I'd love to go first.
I'll stay in the vanguard, but I'd like to stay close to you. Allow me to walk side by side with you, Jimmer. Would that be all right? Well, I was... In the vanguard, but I'd like to stay close to you.
Allow me to walk side by side with you, Jim.
Would that be all right?
Well, I was going to say I was going to try to stay close to young master will here because I'd like to protect him.
He's quite vulnerable at the moment, and I have some experience as a bodyguard.
Nice.
We have not heard enough from Jimmer.
This is awesome.
Nice.
We have not heard enough from Jimmer.
This is awesome.
You get to the top of the stairs,
and off to your right, maybe 20, 30 feet away towards the center of the room,
is a 10-foot-wide iron door.
This, you would assume, is the door that leads out,
because from that door is a red carpet
that leads the entire length of the room up to a staircase that leads to a dais with a throne.
Oh, wow.
Oh, my God.
Above the throne room to both the right and the left are two long balconies, both reachable by the winding staircase you just came up.
For example, on this side and across the room, you see another identical winding staircase
that also probably leads down deeper into the dungeons, or you can take it up to the balcony.
If you continue going up this staircase, you would think it takes you to the balcony directly above you.
Behind the throne,
you can see that it once had the sigil of Highbury
on like a large wooden plaque,
two griffins on a field vert.
On a field vert.
Rampant on a field vert.
Rampant on a field vert.
But it has almost been
completely scratched out
and painted over in
what you can only imagine is blood and sinew.
Oh my god.
Is the crude image of a fly.
Oh my god.
With a skull on its back.
No, come on.
They fall into Urgathor worship?
There are various people in the room.
You see two guards standing in front of the throne,
in front of the steps leading up to the dais.
At first glance, it appears that they're wearing black armor,
but as your eyes adjust to the light of the room,
you can see that they're made up of only glistening black bones
that give the appearance
of blackened
steel.
They each have a short sword
in each hand. They each
have a short sword in each hand?
Yes. Oh no. Oh shit.
Oh fudge. Oh man.
Up atop
the dais, sitting on the throne
is a man who looks sickly pale and thin.
You can see that he's missing clumps of hair, and the bones underneath his skin are protruding through his paper-thin flesh.
in flesh behind him kind of shrouded in the, you know,
the drapes that are decorating the throne is a female figure that you can't
quite see her hand resting gently on the man's shoulder.
Oh,
this is her,
his bride.
He speaks.
Oh,
you have taken something that does not belong to you.
Leave the orphan.
Lay down your weapons.
And prepare to join him in the dungeon.
And Sir Will is up here.
Sir Will's up here.
He's just behind Jimmer.
And you hear your brother's voice,
your brother Bartholomew.
Right, and he's full, like,
basically full health now, so...
He's just like,
Bartholomew, what...
What is this madness?
Where... What are you doing?
Where is Mother? Where is Father?
You step out into the room?
Yeah, exactly. Like, he's just completely confused by this.
My father is dead.
Having fallen victim to an unfortunate accident in the world wound.
What a waste.
unfortunate accident in the world wound.
What a waste.
He spent his life fighting other people's wars and perished so far from his home
instead of protecting his own domain.
My mother has fled.
Huh.
Oh.
To be honest, I do not know why.
When I took over, I sent for her merely to talk, but Mother was never interested in talking to me.
No, sending me into the priesthood to cure me of my proclivities was a veiled punishment and a means of ensuring that Highbury would never be mine.
I imagine in her warped, feeble mind, she would have dreamt up some loophole to have a detritus halfling sit the rose throne.
In truth, I can't be too angry with her.
Because sending me away allowed me to find my true calling.
And my love.
He, like, reaches his hand up and rests it on the woman's hand on his shoulder.
Don't worry. I have hounds nipping at her heels as we speak,
and she will return to Highbury to face judgment in front of me,
in front of my queen, and in front of the Pallid Princess.
Oh, God.
No, Bartholomew, do not do it.
Please.
I don't know what...
I don't know who has corrupted you, but...
Please.
Mother has done nothing wrong.
What of Benric?
Where is Benric?
Ah.
Benric.
Yes.
The only one still alive with a true claim to the throne.
A man who can't even wipe himself after he shits.
How many doctors and wizards did they bring in to try and cure him?
Though he would have made a terrible ruler.
Unlike you, I loved my true brother.
This fucking guy.
What a fucking dick.
And that is why I cured him.
Where all others failed.
Oh no.
Oh no.
When I left here, Willamette, I learned firsthand the great power Ogathoa possesses and bestows upon her subjects.
Would you like to see Benric?
The soft-hearted fool always cared for you, and now he's up and out of bed for the first time in years.
Oh, no.
God damn it, LaValley.
Thanks to me.
And when you say me, you mean Troy.
Yeah.
You sick fuck.
And he just waves his hand in the air.
And at that, all of you hear a loud sound like the scraping of metal upon rock, followed by slow shuffling of feet across the floor.
And from a side door, out limps a body of a man, head down towards the floor, clad in
armor, dragging a greatsword behind him.
He reaches the front of the throne and looks up at you all cold blue eyes burning
out from behind a face oh man composed only of bones oh what a monster what a monster
no silver man roll a perception check. Oh, my God.
49.
What the fuck?
The sword that he drags across the throne room is Gorim's thorn.
Whoa, what? What?
Lay down your weapons.
This ends here.
You hear sounds of battle outside.
Lives being lost for which side you know not.
What do you do?
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Holy shit. I don't know know what do you guys do it's your character your case your castle it's your castle i know but i'm unarmed and in a
loincloth i don't know perhaps ask for some help uh oh yeah uh well sir willamette yeah he'll say benrick no uh these guards they're obviously like
undead right i mean sir will could even do a knowledge religion and know that they're undead
they appear to be now that he's in his right mind and the whole ergothoa thing uh so he'll be like
please he'll look back at jimmer desperately please try to not harm my brother he the the
younger one and he's pointing to the one who's dragging a sword and like maybe he's too far gone
it's like sad that will is even hoping that there's a chance to save him yeah but he's like
the others and then his like expression darkens a little bit, and he's like, and Bartholomew, kill them, please.
The woman steps forward, and she is beautiful.
Insanely beautiful, like out of a comic book.
And she steps forward out of the shadows and shows herself. And it just doesn't add up how this sickly man who looks like he's wasting away on the throne with clumps of hair could join with someone so unbelievably attractive.
And as you're conferring, all of a sudden, her clothes start to just fall away into pieces, still retaining most of her buxom frame,
just little shards of clothing clinging to her.
And the pieces of her skin that are revealed are like soaking wet with fresh blood.
And she appears to be a withered corpse
from the neck down.
Oh, wow.
Oh, that's a development.
Roll for initiative.
Oh, my God.
This is happening.
It's happening.
This is happening.
The battle for Highbury begins.
I got to say that one of the reasons Sir Will is like,
fucking kill him.
This dude, Bartholomew, has been an asshole for a really long time.
And a bad dude.
And that's why he was sent away.
And it makes sense that he ends up with Urgothoa.
You know what I mean?
Troy, it makes perfect fucking sense.
Well done.
Well done.
Bravo.
Backfired.
Yeah.
Uh,
God,
what a fucking asshole.
And so like now Will is like,
fuck this guy.
He is beyond any sort of redemption,
but Ben Rick,
uh,
maybe,
maybe long shot,
but maybe Ben Rick is up and ready to fight.
You gotta give,
you gotta give Bartholomew credit where credit's due.
He's got a lot of bones and skulls, right?
That's true.
Yes, he is undead.
Adriel, what's your roll there?
Adriel rolled a four.
Oh, Adriel.
Oh, this ain't Baron Redheart, folks.
Let me take off my glasses.
Is that Grant Berger over there?
I can't quite see to it.
Natural one is a 14 for Grant Berger.
Wait a minute.
I don't know, Dad.
Is that Grant Berger over there?
I wish you would shut your ears.
Jimmer, what'd you get?
24.
24.
24.
Yes.
Metro.
20.
24. Nicely done. A Metro. Sil. Metra. 20. 24. Nicely done.
A Metra.
Silver Tusk.
23.
23.
It is round one.
I'm so excited.
Ben Rick Keswick rolled a 25.
Oh, man.
That son of a 25. Oh, man. That son of a bitch. He charges directly at whoever that first person is there.
Who has the flame in their hand?
That is Grant.
Adriel.
Adriel.
Charges at Adriel with Gorham's Thorn.
Oh, no.
And swings.
His AC goes down, but he does get the bonus to hit on the charge.
That is very low.
An 11 to hit.
Flat footed.
That is.
Let me just double check.
Nope, that's a miss.
That is a miss.
Wow.
He is right up in your business.
Now, Benrick is pretty much the only.
You guys, the rest of the party is what?
60 feet away?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, the rest of the evil party, the enemies.
It is Jimmer's turn.
Jimmer, what are you going to do?
All right.
55 feet away, the first combatant.
Jimmer is going to step 15 feet over to his right and 5 feet up.
Kind of clear away from the other.
Yeah, get away from the others.
Right on the red carpet.
Right on the carpet.
And he's going to try to antagonize Bartholomew.
Oh!
Oh, very cool.
So, intimidation check?
Yeah, he's going to look at Bartholomew.
He says, Mr., I don't know who you are,
but I got a feeling you'd have to study up to be a half-wit.
And he's going to do an
intimidate check. DC is 10
plus his hit dice plus his
wisdom modifier. Yes.
So roll the natural one.
So that's a 21. Alright.
Let's see. 10 plus
his hit dice plus his
it's actually a fail. Yeah.
Just because it was a 1.
Yeah.
Damn.
But you are...
You stepped out there.
You know, Jimmer got tied up in all this.
He just came to retrieve a body.
Yeah.
I didn't sign up for this.
He's got to shake off the cobwebs.
It is now Silvermane's turn.
Silvermane, oh man.
As his first act, he sees Benra come up.
He hears Sir Will's pleas to spare this person. uh silvermane uh oh man as his first act he sees benrick come up he hears sir wills please
to uh spare this person and he knows this name it seems distant but this name of benrick he knows
deep in your memories something deep in his memories he knows but he looks beyond help but
he he he he's still clinging to sir will's pleas he's gonna reach out it's a fucking
silverman i'm realizing yeah almost with a tear in his eye and he's going to twist his hand
and he's going to warp the metal of gorham oh yeah oh wow so he begins to bend Gorham's thorn with a warp metal spell.
Oh, my God.
I mean, I'm sure the magical weapon gets a fortitude save, yes?
Yes.
Yeah, it does.
So it's a DC 23 save for the weapon.
Okay.
Now, does it take the wielder?
It takes the wielder's fortitude save, I believe.
Fortitude save. Will.
Oh, is it Will? Yes, you're right.
DC 20. Sorry, not
23, 20. Okay. Will save.
This is Benrick's will save.
Yes.
Fail.
Amazing.
Ben's Gorham's Thorn.
It now has a minus four to hit.
Can it be repaired?
It is
permanent, but I'm sure he could warp it back.
He could warp it back.
A minus four to hit. But for now, he's just
trying to make him so ineffective that
even somebody who
isn't familiar with the whole situation
like Adriel will not feel threatened by this blade.
Okay.
I've bent spoons before, Joe, and they never went back right when I unbent them.
And then he's going to fan out into the middle of the room just behind Jimmer.
Just behind?
On the red carpet.
Jimmer.
Okay.
It is the black skeleton's turn.
You can see that they have, like,
clinging to their black bones,
vestments that look like they were once
members of the court here.
They were actually part of the Highbury Guard
and have been twisted by Bartholomew.
This Ergothoa shit is so fucked up.
It really is.
We've been dealing with this for a while
in Giant Slayer,
and it is messed up.
It really is messed up.
There is some messed up stuff in this world,
and Urgothoa is among the most messed up-it-est.
I completely agree.
I completely agree.
They both charge.
One charges at Silvermane
with two swords swinging.
And the other one charges at Jimmer. The first one at Silvermane with two swords swinging. And the other one charges at Jimmer.
The first one at Silvermane.
That is going to be a 27 to hit.
Miss.
Miss.
It's almost as if it hits a blue field of magical energy.
Oh, interesting.
Shield of faith.
As it deflects off.
That would be a ring of protection. Oh, okay. All right. Ring of faith. As it deflects off, that would be a ring of protection.
Oh, okay.
Ring of protection plus four.
Oh, wow.
I can't even imagine what Jimmer's AC is.
But this charging black skeleton is looking for a 19 to 20.
Let me ask you, a 19, does that hit?
No, it does not.
As a matter of fact.
That's shocking that a 19 doesn't hit and shimmer.
Yeah, that doesn't hit.
These guys are fucked.
Okay, well, I have a feeling Bartholomew and his corpse bride have something to say about that.
Corpse bride, I like that.
That's good.
As they're running towards you, they have an aura about them that they activate
as a free action to try and scare you
because there's something so unsettling
about their presence that that alone is very freaky.
Both of you roll a will save.
Me?
Actually, all of you are within 60 feet,
so all of you roll a will save.
28 for Silverman.
29 for Adriel.
26.
26.
28.
28.
You're all immune
from its frightful presence
that would have affected you
for 5d6 rounds.
Oh, hell yeah.
Oh, shit.
Okay, so it is now
Metra's turn.
What is Metra?
So you said these spiral staircases lead to balconies?
Yes, so the one you're on right now will lead to that balcony that's directly above you,
the sort of rectangle that I've drawn to the right here that's on another level.
And then on the other side, there's a staircase that leads down to who knows where,
but also up to that opposite balcony.
My goal in designing this was kind of loosely based on Anor Londo
from Dark Souls.
Oh, yes. Of course.
Yes. Okay, so Metra
is going to run up this
spiral staircase to get up on the balcony, get a better
view of things. Okay.
And then
something weird starts to happen
underneath the
skeleton that's fighting with Silvermane.
Okay.
Please roll a reflex save.
Okay.
Reflex save.
I rolled a 12.
That's a fail.
Okay.
So a hungry pit appears beneath its feet.
What?
And you fall into the pit.
So please roll another Reflex save.
I don't want to.
Nine.
I rolled a natural three.
Oh, yes.
Yes.
Okay, so you fail that as well.
Okay, so first things first,
you take 60 feet worth of falling damage.
Oh, my God.
60 feet?
Wow.
This is a very dark pit,
so let me just roll that.
Let's do it step by step here.
Let me roll that. This is amazing. That's. So let me just roll that. Let's do it step by step here. Let me roll that.
This is amazing.
That's 66, right?
Yeah, 66.
Oh, God.
So that's 24 points of damage.
Oh, nice.
But this is not just any pit.
This is a hungry pit.
This pit's hungry.
So creatures who fall into the hole take falling damage as normal.
In addition, anyone within the pit, not just those on the bottom,
takes 46 points of bludgeoning damage each round as the pit contracts and then returns to its normal size.
Whoa!
It's like the pit of the Sarlacc.
It's trying to digest you.
Over and over and over.
As you are slowly digested over a thousand years.
So you take another 19 points of damage.
Nice.
That skeleton is dead.
Yes!
Oh!
It falls.
Oh my god.
It falls. Oh, my God. It falls.
The damage from the fall is enough to take it within 18 hit points left,
and then it eats it for the final 19 hit points.
Wow. Amazing.
So one skeleton down, and Sir Will, as you see that thing fall, you're like,
Johnny?
Yeah.
Johnny!
Johnny!
Johnny Five!
He used to read me stories at night.
And now this sorcerer killed him.
I fucking hate Devil's Mom.
He's dead already.
Sometimes dead is better.
All right, so one skeleton down, one remains.
Benric remains in Bartholomew and his bride.
And it is Bartholomew Keswick's turn.
He is going to step off the throne.
Let me just check the range on this shiznicky.
Jonathan Shiznicky.
You know what?
This is so awesome.
We should do this more often.
Just a complete change of scenery for a session.
Yeah, yeah. A complete change of scenery yeah for a session yeah yeah complete
change of it's just really fun it freshens things up you know what i mean exactly for a long time
there's a lot else going on in the world and when you see this it should remind you that skirkatla's
goal is happening yes yeah it's spreading it's spreading if it can spread to highbury what other
castles are being affected?
Yeah, but it's not just Skirkala.
Brander is also mentioning this shit.
He was talking almost with a certain reverence about Urgothoa to Lork as Ymir when he was in the tent.
He is a dude that wants to...
He was like, have you heard of Urgothoa?
Yeah, yeah.
It's fucking brander man
yeah he wants to side with the winners
okay so Bartholomew is going to get off
the throne move 30 feet forward and cast
a spell on Metra okay Metra roll a will
save a will save you say
17
No no
DC 18
We need Metra the whole time
We need you
Something happens
As Bartholomew reaches his hand up to you
Something happens to you
You feel very strange
You feel very strange.
You feel this unnatural compulsion.
You don't know why you want to do this,
but you just want to gorge on a nearby helpless or dead humanoid creature
and begin eating its flesh.
Oh, God.
Is there one nearby?
There's one in that pit. Oh, God. Is there one nearby? There's one in that pit.
Oh, my God.
You, the target, does not take extraordinary risks to satisfy this urge.
It wouldn't jump over a pit or swim through lava to reach a suitable victim.
If you can't fulfill the urge on your next turn, the spell fails.
However, if one of your friends falls in this next round.
Or if one of the good guys falls.
Or if one of the good guys falls.
Yeah, yeah.
Or bad guys, rather.
You might have to eat them.
I might have to eat them.
Whose side are you on, O'Brien?
I know.
Imagine if Metra.
I just revealed myself.
A. Willamette.
Oh.
Oh, God.
Oh, no.
Serves him right.
Serves him right.
That'll teach him.
It is his bride's turn.
His bride, who you know from having access to flashbacks, is DeBellis' sister.
I wonder if we were going to know her.
They mentioned the place with the weather being nice.
Yeah.
Again. How are the autumns in Varno being nice. Yeah. Again.
How are the autumns in Varno?
Yes.
Right.
Are we in Varno?
Just brought that back up a couple of times.
It's all code, bro.
It's all code for fucking Highbury, bro.
I imagine.
Did you ever play Nioh?
You played Nioh. Yeah, I did.
I think it's the second boss.
She's just this like flying, awful creature.
I imagine her as like an anime boss
it's like you just hear
her laugh and then she just fucking shows
up next to you while she just
and goes invisible
right after you swung at her she'd probably say
so disney
she goes invisible
and it is
making his first turn
as a member of this podcast, Adriel Ashpeak.
Do it.
Do something cool.
Give me the grace I need to save my own skin.
Swift action calls grace on himself.
Moves forward 5, 10, 15, 20 feet.
Oh, snap.
Cast a 20-foot wide radius spell around the big bad guy.
That's right.
It's Blade Barrier.
Oh!
What?
I can only hope that your bride is in this circle with you,
and you can enjoy holy matrimony together.
In the distance, you hear...
That is nuts.
I hate that.
I hate the animation. I hate it. Their laughs echoing off the cathedral
walls
invisible laughter
it's so crazy
so the way that the blade
barrier it's basically
just an immobile wall of just
swirling blades and I
place it in a way to where it blocks
access to the throne, so
hopefully she either moved back or is
inside of there and will get caught up in it,
but for sure,
the big bad evil brother is inside.
Okay, and what does it mean?
He cannot move out of it without taking damage?
Yeah, he's gonna get a reflex save if he
tries to move through. And Grace allows
you to move past Benric without provoking, right?
Swift action, no provocation
whatsoever, and it's a 20-foot high wall.
Guys, we're going into round two,
and it is Benric's turn.
Badass.
Benric,
Benric's got some movement speed here,
but he is going to...
Well, Sir Will is out there, but he's just not
represented on the map. He's not represented
on the map. Of course not represented on the map.
Of course Benric has to attack.
Yeah.
Because he doesn't know.
Fuck. And so, Sir Will, you're just standing there as Benric.
And obviously, there's just bones left, but you can see the shape of his face.
This sucks so fucking bad.
What does his face look like?
And you know that the only reason he's in this position is because Brander cursed him to make sure that you would join the knights of it sucks and it's like
to me this is like the next just son thing that you've done to me because it like it isn't
something that's come you can come back from yeah like he's obviously too far fucking gone he's
pretty dead to do anything about it god fucking damn it hey you know what though Minus four to attack So Let's see what happens
Fuck
That's a twenty
Five foot step
And
Cracked eye
Oh buddy
He has no armor
Yeah no armor
And he has no
Almost no
Oh you know what
I forgot
I rolled a natty seventeen
I forgot
Gorm's thorn
Is a keen Dread swordorn is a keen threat sword.
That is a critical threat.
Oh, no.
Well, it's minus four to hit.
Okay.
Oh, that's all it is, so it doesn't mean it can't crit.
Yeah, I mean, with no armor, it's still over a 20 to hit.
So it's still a critical threat.
So to confirm, over 20 again to confirm.
Are you kidding me?
So he confirms a crit with Gorm's Thorn. A warped Gorim's Thorn.
A warped Gorim's Thorn. On his brother!
On his brother! Sir Will!
My iPad went out.
This is a lot of damage. Were it not
for Adriel, this could be enough
to put you
down. Yeah, yeah.
Seriously, Adriel saved his life right here.
26 points of damage.
Okay. If you had not been healed, if they just brought you up like, we'll get him out of here, game over.
You would really kill him.
Yep.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Instead, you take 26 points of damage.
It's nothing.
In the 90s.
He's got over 100, yeah.
But Benrick did it to you.
Yeah, it's so shitty, dude.
It's so shitty.
It's Jimmer's turn.
Jimmer, you've got Silvermane just directly behind you to your right.
Before we do a new round, we never had Will do initiative.
So if he's attackable, he should be able to fight back.
So I know we're kind of doing it on the fly, but even if it's a grapple check.
We'll say he goes after Adriel.
So he would have gone before Benric.
What's that?
He would have gone before Benric.
Benric starts the round. Oh, Benric was the fastest. What's that? He would have gone before Benrick. Benrick starts the round.
Oh, Benrick was the fastest.
That's right.
All right.
Well, let's say he held his action.
Okay.
Then Benrick went.
Sure.
Hit him.
And so now he'll
attempt a disarm.
Okay.
So I'll just like
try to disarm him.
Okay.
And, you know,
he's got a roll super high
and natural fucking 19.
Oh, yeah.
So,
I don't have the numbers in front of me.
Sure.
What's his CMD?
Is it more than 25?
No, it's 17.
Yeah, so he definitely disarms him.
You step up and after he hits you and crits, you rip Scormstorn out of his hand and it just collapses.
Clangs on the ground.
All warped.
Clangs to the ground.
Awesome.
Oh, man.
Now it is Jimmer's turn.
Jimmer!
Behind you to your right is Silvermane.
In front of you is this black skeleton, the one remaining.
To the right of him is a hungry pit.
And then obviously you see Benric and Willamette locked in battle.
Metra is up on the balcony.
Bartholomew is trapped in this blade barrier,
and the woman, his bride, is nowhere to be seen.
All right.
Jimmer is going to take a five-foot step to his left
so that he is adjacent to both Benric and the other skeleton.
And he is going to unleash a full attack with...
This is going to be horrifying to behold.
With Terminus Est, his long sword.
Terminus Est.
It's the end?
Yes.
Are you going for the black skeleton or Benric?
He's going to go for the black skeleton first.
Okay.
And, yeah, first attack.
Power attack on.
That is a 35
to hit. That is a hit.
Badass. I have a
feeling this is going to be pretty painful.
Pretty, pretty.
That is 26 points of
damage. Okay. And you can see
that like, there's a skeleton, there's some
DR there as you're swinging
through, but you still land a powerful hit.
All right, and second attack, natural 20.
Oh!
What?
Shimmer!
Shimmer!
I wondered if we were going to get a face!
Critical job!
I mean, roll for the obvious confirm.
Oh, come on.
And he also has critical focus, so it's an additional plus four on his confirm roll.
And that is a 30 to confirm.
Yeah, it's a confirmed crit.
And you know how many times my bad guys have critical focus and I always forget about that plus four?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So clutch.
It's huge.
It really is huge.
Well, we've got to go to a fan critical on episode 200.
We've got to go to episode 200.
Fan critical.
This one from Jack in Northern Virginia. Okay. Wow. We've got to go to a fan critical on episode 200. We've got to go to episode 200. Fan critical.
This one from Jack in Northern Virginia.
Okay.
Wow.
Right in the kisser.
Your attack hits the target right in the mouth.
Oh, normal damage.
But normal damage and the target is staggered for 1d4 rounds.
Okay.
According to save, makes it one round instead.
Okay, so normal damage.
Alright, so that's 30 points of damage.
Okay.
And then you are staggered.
That means only one standard, which means your two-weapon fighting is out the fucking window! Yeah, yeah.
Or a move action.
I gotcha.
Fortitude Save makes it one round.
Otherwise, it's 1d4 rounds.
And the Fortitude Save is against his comp, which is 30. So I have to roll a natural 20. I do you. Fortitude save makes it one round. Otherwise, it's 1d4 rounds. And the fortitude save is against his comp, which is 30.
So I have to roll a natural 20.
I do not.
So it's 1d4.
So it's 1d4 rounds.
Skid, please roll.
How many rounds?
He's staggered.
Roll a 1d4.
You hit him right in the face.
Two rounds.
In the face.
Bad news.
He's still alive, though.
He's still alive, but he is staggered.
Do you have another attack?
I do.
So seeing, sensing that his opponent, that he dealt his opponent a staggering blow,
he's going to turn his attention to Bartholomew with his third attack.
Oh, Benric.
Natural 20.
Oh, my God.
Natural 20.
He just crit Benric.
Benric.
Oh, my God.
So Will disarms him.
He staggers back for a second
This undead creature
And then just squabbles
Turns to his left and wham
Natural 19 on the confirm
What is the actual confirm
Just in case
The actual confirm is
35
That's a confirmed
This one from Sarah in South Carolina.
Oh, and before you do that, I am also going to enact a daily ability once per day, deadly critical,
which is going to increase the crit modifier of my weapon by one.
Are you kidding me?
Yeah, so I'm going to do that.
If that says triple damage, it'll be quadruple.
What is it?
It's double. it's triple.
Oh my god, I'm reading this.
Okay, so it's called Guard Break.
Your target feebly attempts
to block your blow with a weapon,
shield, or armor. You may make an immediate
free Sunder combat maneuver
against the target's armor, weapon, or shield
without provoking an attack of opportunity.
If the piece of equipment becomes broken or worse after this damage is rolled, your attack continues right into the target's armor, weapon, or shield without provoking an attack of opportunity. If the piece of equipment becomes broken or worse
after this damage is rolled, your attack
continues right into the target's flesh
dealing triple damage.
Otherwise, regular damage.
So basically, you want to roll a
free Sunder maneuver.
If it's successful against the CMD,
you deal triple damage.
Which for him will be quadruple.
Yeah, because it goes through the weapon
and into the creature.
You didn't say the names
of these people.
No,
I did right before.
It was Sarah
from South Carolina.
Okay,
I'm sorry.
Sarah from South Carolina
guard brick.
That's cool.
The enemy holds up
this one blade
that he has
and you fucking
slice right through it.
Can you do it?
Okay,
so I rolled
a 19
on the CMB.
Yeah, total.
And that's just straight up against my CMD.
Yeah.
So you sundered at the time.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my.
Yes!
Okay.
Benrick's CMD was 17.
Okay.
He hasn't had as many fighting years.
Oh, that's right.
It's very sad.
Oh, my God.
Wow.
Okay, so.
I forgot it's Benrick.
He doesn't even have it. Yeah. So soft. Oh, my God. Wow. Okay, so... I forgot it's Benric. He doesn't even have any...
Yeah.
So that is 104 points of damage.
Benric had 27 hit points.
So, I mean, you hit that skeleton twice.
On the second hit, you hit him so fucking hard that he's just like...
This undead skeleton.
And then you just, in a flour flourished turn and land a blow on
Benric that goes straight through his armor
and Sir Will you're standing
right there
and you see Benric just turn
to dust
bone dust everywhere like
coughing
on the bone dust
of what was once your brother
fuck god wow on the bone dust of what was once your brother. Oh, fuck!
God.
Wow.
Wow.
That was...
That was a badass round, Skid.
I gotta say.
Yeah, that worked out pretty well.
As a player, I gotta say.
Hey, human fighter is not so bad, huh?
It's all right.
Yeah, two crits.
Two crits will do it.
The skeleton's still alive.
The skeleton's still...
He's still in the field.
Grand.
Classic Grand. Classic Dana.
She's trying to cheat no matter what's going on.
Silver Tusk, you're up.
Right now you're dealing with an invisible bride.
Some sort of awful blood-covered woman.
Half naked.
You're dealing with a cleric of Urgothoa.
You're dealing with a blackened skeleton that is staggered.
One has been eaten by a hungry pit.
And Benric Keswick is dust.
Boy, this family is a lot of trauma.
It really is.
So Silvermane, he was looking at the corpse bride.
He was eyeing her up, but then she went invisible.
And he knows.
It's so frustrating.
It's right at the edge of his grasp.
He can cast level seven spells.
Oh, my.
True seeing if he's not mute, but he's mute.
Oh, right.
And unable to cast the true seeing spell.
Right. Just yet. Gross. One more level. One more level. Oh, right. And unable to cast the true seeing spell. Right.
Just yet.
Gross.
One more level.
One more level.
Oh, no.
So frustrating.
So what he's going to do is take his bow, and he's going to fire it three times at Bartholomew.
Oh.
I'm sorry.
Remind me.
Grant, does your spell prevent that from happening?
Is it like a stone wall or something?
You can't see through it, that's for sure. The blade barrier is a mobile vertical curtain of whirling blades
shaped in pure force that springs into existence.
How tall is it?
20 feet tall.
Okay, in that case, he is going to,
he'll change his action to just trying to take out the creature that...
Oh, it provides cover against attacks made through it.
So you can attack, but it's a plus four bonus to AC or plus two bonus on reflex saves to anything on the other side of it.
Did you shoot range to cover?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, if it's plus four to your AC.
You've got to deal with cover rolls.
Yeah.
Yeah, I can do that.
Okay.
All right, so I'm going to try to work my way through this because...
There's like little holes.
How good.
Silvermane is...
How much does he remember of his old self?
Yeah.
He's fantastically proficient with a bow.
But he still has to roll a fucking die.
Yep.
God damn it.
How many shots do you get?
He's going to... He's got three shots.
He's going to enact deadly aim.
Okay.
Okay.
And he's also going to, and his hawk is also with him, by the way.
Is the hawk just...
His hawk familiar is going to obviously help him out a little bit.
But mainly, he's going to use an ability from his domain called Hawkeye, which gives him a bonus on ranged attacks.
It's a swift action.
Oh, my God.
For a full round, plus seven.
Oh, my God.
To his ranged attacks.
Every attack.
And he can do that seven, nine times a day.
That is insane.
When I said, oh, my God, I looked over at Joe's iPad and saw what his two hit is on his bow.
That is ridiculous.
It's plus 26, plus
21, plus 16. Holy crap.
That's why I don't mind your minus 4.
Or your plus 4 to your AC.
Okay. I should also say that
I named his bow Moonshadow.
After Mossmoon.
My old buddy Mossmoon.
Shut the fuck up!
Shut up right now!
Stop! Stop! You know I can't even see there! by a moon shadow. Shut the fuck up. Shut up right now. Stop.
I'm being killed
by a moon shadow.
You're not like
Cat Stevens either.
Stop.
Stop.
I made this fucking clear.
Please stop.
I didn't know
he was off limits too.
He is on the fucking list
as well.
God damn.
Cat's in the cradle
in the silver spoon.
Stop.
Stop it.
Stop it.
It's very cheap.
Here we go.
Stop it anyway.
I know, but that was what I remember.
I can't watch Harold and Maude.
Nick Lowe, that's his favorite movie is Harold and Maude.
I can't watch that fucking movie because of the soundtrack.
He loves that movie.
He loves that movie.
That's a great movie.
All right, Moonshadow, what do you got?
Plus four to Bartholomew's AC.
Thank you.
A natural one is still a natural 1
Natural 20
Oh my god
Wow
Oh that's very very nice
Oh my goodness
To confirm
That is a 40
That is a confirmed crit
That is a confirmed
Wow I know this is insane That is a 40. That is a confirmed crit. That is a confirmed.
Wow.
Most crits we've had ever.
I know.
This is insane.
This is ridiculous.
All right.
Let's see.
I can't believe this.
Here we go.
This is Cole from Orlando, Florida.
That's Cole.
Ventilated.
Your projectile strikes with such sudden violence It passes violently through the target
And leaves a gaping exit wound
Double damage, which is triple damage
Right
And 1d6 bleed as the wound gushes
Wow
1d6 bleed, that's awesome
Oh my god, this is so much fun
That's really nice
Okay, so
That is That is Oh my god, this is so much fun. That's really nice. Okay, so that is 49 points of damage plus 1d6 bleed on the first attack.
Okay, he is unconscious and dying.
Yes!
God.
Oh my god.
Yeah, I mean, he's not super powerful.
He has 43 hit points.
He's unconscious and dying.
The bleed, it's possible the bleed could kill him.
Yeah, it's 1d6.
That's no joke.
Okay, that's on his turn.
All right, so Silvermane is then going to turn.
He goes down.
He hasn't moved yet.
Second attack, he's going to fire.
So I should also say that he he's got favorite enemies so that was
with a favorite enemy bonus against humans right he also has favorite enemy undead oh
shoot so there's this work we had favorite enemy undead too right exactly but silvermane took it
first so his highest bonus is against undead and uh there is an amazing feat called where is it shape-shifting hunter
shape-shifting hunter feat allows you to stack druid levels with ranger levels for the purposes
of favorite enemy and ranger levels with druid levels for the purposes of wild shape
isn't that cool wow that's really cool shape. Really cool feet. Shapeshifting hunter. That's so cool. And so, yeah.
So he will then turn his attention to the undead creature,
and that is going to be a 26 to hit.
Yeah, that is a hit.
That is a hit.
It's a hit, so that's nine.
That's 27 points of damage.
Dead turns to undead.
Yes!
So all that is. And he still has an attack, but there's no one left to attack. You can't find of damage. Yes! So all that is...
And he still has an attack,
but there's no one left to attack.
You can't find the bride.
I can't see her.
I can't see her,
so that'll end his round.
Okay.
All right.
Very good round.
Well, no, you can still attack the skeleton,
the one that's been staggered.
You just killed it.
I just killed it.
Oh, you did.
Oh, that was...
Yeah.
And the one in the pit died, right?
Yep.
The one in the pit died.
So there's no targets
except for DeBellis' sister.
Yes.
Thank you again to Cole from Florida, because that was an awesome one-shot.
Yes, that was really, really good.
Thank you.
It is Metra's turn.
Metra, you have another save.
You're allowed another save here to try and end this.
If you fail this save, I want you to go down those stairs and start scooping Benrick's
ashes into your mouth. Jesus.
That's what I want
you to do.
17. Oh my god.
It's DC 18, right? It's DC 18.
Oh my god. That's a
natural three. Why?
That's the second natural three I rolled. You go down
and like right in front of
Sir Willamette, who you just met, who has some connection to your daughter.
You like fall to your knees and just start shoving the ashes of his brother into your mouth.
That's so bad.
Sir Will is like starting to make sense.
Stella now.
Starting to make sense.
Yeah, yeah.
Like mother, like daughter.
So that's my turn.
Obviously, I'm taking some liberties with the flavor of the spell, but it's not too far off.
It's called ghoul hunger.
Will you eat a nearby helpless or dead humanoid creature?
I mean, Benric is helpless.
I'm sorry.
Bartholomew is helpless.
That would take an extraordinary action.
She just has to walk through the...
So if you go through it, you take a lot of damage.
She wouldn't do it because it's an extraordinary measure in order to...
Benric's actions are right there.
If Willamette was down, I would definitely end this flesh there.
I would have you go for Willamette, but instead you just start scooping Benric's actions.
I love the idea of them being so hungry.
How long does this last?
How long does this last?
Excellent question.
It's called ghoul hunger, by the way.
One round per level.
It's going to last a little bit.
I've got to save every round?
You've got to save every round to end it.
I'll use a different die next time.
It is Bartholomew's turn.
He's going to roll to try and stabilize, and he's going to take bleed.
He fails the stabilize check.
Well, he takes the bleed before he even tries.
Fair enough.
The bleed is three points.
Three points of bleed. Okay. And he fails., he takes the bleed before he even tries. Fair enough. The bleed is three points. Three points of bleed.
Okay. And he fails.
So he takes another point.
Okay, and so how much damage did you say
it was? 49, right? 49.
He failed his check. He takes
another three, failed his check, another one.
Okay, let me just make
sure here. He is actually
still breathing.
He's not permanently dead.
It is
her turn.
Bride. The bride.
The beautiful bride. Perhaps she
hitched her wagon to the wrong
star.
Bartholomew is the prince
that was promised, right?
It's that kind of thing.
Not quite. Nope. Not Bartholomew is the prince that was promised Right? It's that kind of thing Not quite Not Bartholomew
All right
Let me see what I want to do here
She's got so much going on
Who is downstage
Right here
Is that
No no
I think that is Adriel yes The one that's closest to Bartholomew Stage right here. Is that? No, no.
I think that is Adriel, yes?
The one that's closest to Bartholomew?
Correct, that is Adriel.
Okay, Adriel. Adriel, all of a sudden you feel a presence on you,
and she just appears next to you and just reaches out to try and grab you.
And so she goes to just do a straight up CMB against your CMD.
26.
It is not a human.
It's not a giant.
26 is exactly my.
Oh, no.
What a roll of valley, you son of a bitch.
She just appears and just bites on your neck,
and you take two points of con damage.
Oh, that's nasty.
That's not good.
Constitution damage.
It's called blood drain.
The creature drains blood at the end of its turn if it grapples a foe,
dealing con damage.
So she is now visible, and she is just draining the life from you.
And you think, like, maybe this is what she did to keep herself going with Bartholomew as well.
Maybe that's why he was so sickly pale.
Didn't have a lot of hit points.
Looked barely alive.
She was feeding off of him.
It is Adriel's turn.
You are grappled by this horrible, horrible creature.
Is she still invisible?
No, she reappeared.
Yeah, she reappeared.
Yeah, it was not greater invisibility.
Okay.
Adriel's left with no choice.
Adriel has to take a five-foot step backwards.
You can't.
He's grappled.
Oh, I'm grappled.
Yeah, you're grappled.
Oh, shit.
You really have no choice. Yeah, I have no choice. Yeah, you're grappled. Oh, shit. You really have no choice.
Yeah, I have no choice.
I'm trying to think what I can do still.
While I'm grappled, can I attack with just a...
It has to be a small weapon for grapple?
I forget grapple, but I'll try my grapple in a little while.
One-handed?
It just has to be one-handed.
As long as the weapon is drawn.
Well, you know what's going to happen instead?
And yes, my weapon was drawn.
Adriel's going to take a swift action
to start the round. Okay.
Swifty!
Close his eyes and open them
with a brand new flame that you've never seen
before and he is going to erupt
in a ten foot cone.
Flaming shards of rock erupt
from my body and
this evil anime
villain takes 6d6 reflex half points of damage.
Fire damage?
Yes.
Wait, are you casting a spell?
Yep.
So you have to roll
because you're grappling.
Combat casting?
Yeah, if you have combat casting,
you get your bonus.
So it's a concentration check
and it's the grappler's CMD?
B plus... Grappled or pinned while casting is 10 plus the grappler's CMD plus the spell level.
Yeah, so what is the spell level?
I will tell you in one second.
Oh, no, no, no.
You know, this is a 13th level character.
I feel like I'm hopping in a Ferrari on my 15th birthday to listen to my progress lesson.
So I apologize, but it's supernatural.
That shit just happens. Yeah, it just happens. It has So I apologize. It's supernatural. So, uh... That shit just happens.
Yeah, it just happens. It has a
swift action. It's pretty dope. And it's
half fire, half bludgeoning
reflex to half
DC 21 reflex save.
Oh, wow. 9019
got the reflex.
So you are going to
get half of this
sweet, sweet action.
Oh, my God.
Some nasty stuff in there.
I've never seen so many sixes.
23 points of damage, so that's half to 11.
Okay.
So that's just a swift action.
It's a pretty good start.
I'm going to use...
Pretty good swifty.
Not bad.
A weapon of really strange make.
I kind of mentioned it last episode.
The weapon's called Dragon's Tooth.
It's time to take a big old swing.
Oh, wow.
Bad girl.
Here we go.
You both have the grappled condition.
It's going to be a miss.
It's 18 to hit.
18 misses.
She is. She's pretty beef hit. 18 misses. She is.
She's pretty beefy.
There's like only pieces of her, so it's very hard to hit.
Right, right.
I get it.
We're moving into a new round.
It is Sir Willamette Keswick's turn.
You just saw a couple of things.
Oh, my God.
It's so horrible.
A couple of things just happened.
I can't even begin.
You see this warrior who I don't even know if you've exchanged names with.
No.
Destroy what was once your brother.
And you know that that's no longer your brother.
You know that Bartholomew did something to him that took that all away.
And then Della's mom came down and ate his ashes.
And ate him.
God, you're so awful.
I'm honestly...
Guess who's coming to dinner?
I'm honestly not even going to...
Saves up for me.
I'm not even going to pretend that he could have any sort of reasonable reaction at this point.
So can we just say he takes a round off?
He holds while he's fucking...
Like so horrified by the events unfolding. uh well it's jimmer's turn jimmer
where do you want to go it looks like there's only one active combatant left she has grappled
uh the uh the ash peak oracle and is just like draining him of blood he exploded erupted
uh into flames but you can see that that she's still kicking pretty decently.
Okay.
And it's difficult terrain around her, too, if you try to approach.
Just FYI.
Okay.
Why?
Because it's part of the ability.
The shards that came out of me created difficult terrain.
Okay.
So he has 20 feet of movement.
He's going to get as close as he can with one move action to her.
Okay. So he's not going to get there.
He won't get there either way.
But he starts
making his way. Yeah, he starts making his way and he's
going to try to antagonize her. Okay.
And he says
that lady, your brain cavity wouldn't make
a drinking cup for a canary.
And
so that's an intimidate check.
There we go. That's a 35.
You antagonize her.
So is she shaken?
No, no.
Not with this.
She basically has to attack me
or use either ranged
or melee attack or she has to send her
an offensive spell on me on her next turn.
Wow!
I love it. Or there's a barbarian thing. It's like, come get me. melee attack, or she has an offensive spell on me and I'm going to hunt her next turn. Wow. Pretty dope.
I love it.
Wow.
Pretty amazing.
Or there's a barbarian thing.
It's like, come get me.
Oh, yeah.
And there's an actual spell that you can cast to draw the attention of someone, but this
is just a straight-up fight over antagonize.
Yeah, antagonize, yeah.
Very cool.
Wow, that changes my plans.
Okay.
All right.
Okay.
Silver Tusk.
Silver Tusk is going to...
That's awesome.
He's going to size up the situation.
I mean, he sees what this Corpse Bride just did to Adrian.
Adrian?
Adriel.
Adriel.
Adriel.
Adriel.
And then the antagonize obviously has an effect, right?
Right.
You see her.
She's like chomping on him.
And then looks right at Jimmer.
And so now, I hate her.
I hate her.
I hate her.
So Silvermane is going to then move up right next to Jimmer for his action.
And he reaches out silently, touches Jimmer for his action, and he reaches out silently,
touches Jimmer.
Jimmer probably doesn't know what happened.
But something happened. That's it.
He doesn't hear anything.
He just feels a gentle touch on his
bottom.
Well, okay.
All right. He got goosed.
He got goosed.
And something happens. so we'll see.
Metra, I'm going to need you to roll a will save.
Okay.
That should do it.
24.
24.
Whatever happened, you're like, he's coughing up smoke.
Okay.
What do you do?
Metra is going to move back upstairs.
Okay.
Back upstairs.
And. I got a weird taste in your mouth. Metra is going to move back upstairs. Okay. Back upstairs. And...
I got a weird taste in your mouth.
She's pretty horrified by this,
but we'll worry about that later.
And I am going to...
I'm going to cast Disintegrate on you.
There you go.
Disintegrate.
That's good.
And I'm going to throw in this bottle cap.
Oh, the new bottle cap.
So it's a ranged touch attack.
All right, and you are 13th level, so you're going to get a plus 6 to this.
All right.
Okay, I'd say 22 against touch AC.
That is a hit.
Okay.
I don't know.
I don't know.
It doesn't matter if you're grappling.
What level spell is this?
It's a 6-level spell.
You're going to take 26d6 points of damage.
All right, wait.
26d6?
But there's a fortitude save.
If it kills it, right?
No, no.
There's like, no, no.
There's a...
Any creature reduces zero or fewer hit points by a spell is entirely disintegrated.
A disintegrated blah, blah, blah, blah.
No, there's another roll.
Oh, yeah.
A creature object.
Oh, yeah.
You get another fortitude save.
You get a fortitude save. Okay. Is this a death effect? Yes. Oh, yeah. A creature object. Oh, yeah. You get another fortitude save. You get a fortitude save.
Okay.
Is this a death effect?
Yes.
No?
No.
No, it's not.
No, it's not.
Just walking through everything.
It's transmitting a lot.
You get a fortitude save.
All right.
So right now,
we're just talking about fortitude save.
Yeah.
We're just talking about practice.
That was cracked.
Okay.
27.
All right.
You got it. So it's 5d6. Yeah, 5d6. So you take 18 points of damage. Okay. 27. All right. You got it.
So it's 5d6.
Yeah, 5d6.
So you take 18 points of damage.
Okay.
Now it's my turn.
Oh, so if I fail the fortitude save, it goes from 5d6 to 26d6?
26d6.
Yeah.
Let's just see what it would have been.
Yeah, if I had a hell of it.
Just to see what would have happened.
Matthew is...
That would have been 88 points.
Oh, wow. That is a
big difference. Yeah, it is.
Number-wise.
Bartholomew is... But only number-wise.
Only number-wise. Hold on. Bartholomew is
taking one fucking
point of bleed. One bleed
and
natural three still cannot. So he takes
two points of damage.
But he's still technically alive.
He's not permanently dead yet.
Okay.
God, he's just bleeding out and can't stabilize.
Yeah.
What a shitty leader he would have been.
Yeah.
It is her turn.
She lets go of Adriel.
Sets her sights on Jimmer.
And casts Dominate Person.
Oh, no.
Oh, my God.
No, no, no, no, no.
So bad.
Holy fucking shit, that's awful.
Oh, I did not see that coming.
I am going to need you to roll a will save.
Okay, so I have the secret keeper trait.
Oh, so that gives me an additional plus one on my will save against dominate effects.
Wow, you've got a little bit of everything, this character.
Yeah, yeah.
Hey, Detroit fighters are freaking good.
Don't give Skid the keys to a new character castle.
Okay, that is a 23. DC 20. Raiders are freaking good. Don't give Skid the keys to a new character castle. Okay.
That is a 23.
DC 20.
Oh, yes!
Yes!
You are not dominating.
He would have killed us all. If he was dominating, I was going to have him just wipe you out.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, hell no.
Get out of my head, lady!
You ain't dominating me tonight!
Free release of Adriel.
Cast the spell.
Doesn't that provoke an attack of opportunity?
I would have had to roll concentration
to make sure Adriel doesn't.
Natty, 18.
I'm sure I wouldn't have provoked.
However, I am going to move away from Adriel,
which will provoke.
I'm going to take a 20 feet step back.
All right, let's see if Adriel can come through.
She's flying, right?
Nope, she's just walking.
She showed up invisible there.
17 to hit.
17 does not hit.
And you're no longer grappled,
so make sure you take that off your sheet.
It is Adriel's turn.
You are now 20 feet away from this woman.
She is the final combatant left here.
You know Willamette, certainly,
and now all of you know,
although you may not understand the full implications,
that this woman has helped to poison the mind of this man
that has led to the fall of Highbury.
Now, you can make Adriel do a check on this if you like,
but considering I was just grappled by this creature,
did I get a sense that she had bones?
Interesting.
Yeah, yeah, she has bones. Yeah, she has bones.
Oh, she has bones.
Oh.
Then Adriel reaches hand out and kind of use his fingers like a marionette and crunch down with a bone shatter.
Yeah.
What?
If you have spell resistance, spell resistance applies.
I do not.
All right. Then it is a DC 20 fortitude save.
DC 20 fortitude save.
50% chance.
21.
Oh, dang it.
All right.
Dang it.
Let me just roll it for you.
Okay.
Still takes 22 points of damage.
That's pretty good.
Pretty good.
And your creature is fatigued.
Ooh, that's really good.
Man, on a fail, that's really, really good.
Yeah.
Changes her numbers significantly.
Not bad-a-rooney.
We're going to a new round.
Willamette.
I didn't say I was done.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm going to walk right up in her business. And I'm going to a new round. Willamette. I didn't say I was done. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm going to walk right up in her business.
And I'm going to erupt again.
Oh, yes.
Another swift action.
So you can do that multiple times per day.
Absolutely.
I can.
Reflex save.
I made the reflex save.
26.
Yeah, 21 is the reflex save.
So allow me to.
She's got crazy saves.
I want to build a character with her saves.
All right.
That is 10 points of damage.
Half fire, half bludgeoning, if that matters.
Okay, so it was 20 and you made it 10?
It was 21 and I made it 10.
Okay.
All right.
Oh, boy.
All right.
Good round for Adriel.
Not bad.
Not bad at all.
You can take your two shabs.
It's Willametteeswick's turn.
The woman that ate your brother's ashes has now taken off.
She said she was Della's mom, but you assume she's the name of it.
She's just upstairs.
So you're going to go after her, Mattra?
Yeah.
Yeah, you should.
Just fight her with your bare fists.
He's going to punch Mattra in the butt.
Right in the butt.
Right in the butt.
Right in the cheeks.
Will is... Jeez. in the butt right in the butt right in the butt right uh no uh will is geez there's nothing he can do um he's going to only lexington right here oh i need to think about fucking lex where what
oh where is where is he they probably killed fucking lexington i thought of lexington oh i'm
sure you did when you killed him. You were probably in your
apartment alone and you were like
and then he cut his throat
and he watched the blood
run all over his head
and he got all excited. Don't be
don't lie. I thought you noticed there's a
there's a new rug
on the floor.
Oh no. Oh come on.
It's Wolfskin.
Sir Will,
having no real objective
quite here
with being able
to fight these guys,
is going to...
He's going to try to...
He's going to wide walk around
to the outer part
of the combat
and just on the outside
of this,
the wall of blades
that was cast
around Bartholomew
and he's going to stand just outside the wall of was cast around Bartholomew, and he's going to stand just
outside the wall of blades, looking at
Bartholomew's dying body. And he's
torn between wanting him to die
and wanting to talk to him one last time.
As the blades whip by
your face. Exactly. He's just standing just
on the other side of the blades.
Get a close shave.
Okay, this is a big round
here before it gets to her.
You guys know that she has significant power.
She's been dropping some pretty big spells here, so got to make it count.
Jimmer, you are up.
So I still don't have enough movement to close, right?
Because of that blades thing.
Like, if that blades thing wasn't there, you could charge on her.
Right.
But if you
you can only move
20 feet, right? 5, 10, 15,
20. If you roll a reflex save
to avoid, can you stand
in the point where those blades are?
Because if so... Reflex
for half damage. Alright, so
you could get in the space
right next to her to be able to attack
once,
but you would take some damage from these blades right here.
I'm going to point it on the map.
Okay.
Okay.
I feel like if you're traveling for weeks, you might even know the DC of that reflex. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we probably have shared a lot of information.
I'm pretty good at DC.
There we are.
If you had to quantify the difficulty.
All right, so, yeah, he's going to do exactly that.
He's going to step into that space and try to do a reflex save to keep from being too badly hurt.
That is a 19.
That is no good.
No bueno.
So you're getting chopped away.
Gran will roll that damage.
In the meantime, you do get an attack on her.
All right, I'm going to take my single attack, power attack, on this person.
That is a 34 to hit.
That is a hit.
I was waiting for that other natural 20.
23 points of damage.
Okay, 23, 23.
And how many points of damage does Jimmer take from the blade barrier?
49.
Oh, my Lord.
Tis but a scratch.
For old Jimmer, that's nothing.
For old Jimmer for death.
That's nothing.
So for Maine, so for Tusk, you are up.
They are up in her business.
You saw Jimmer just walk into a blade barrier.
Yeah.
Something that would take half of your hit points in a heartbeat.
Silvermane, standing in the back, completely silent, is looking at her.
And imagine the blade barrier that's tearing around the body of Bartholomew.
Those sort of blades are in his eyes looking at this woman,
this undead creature that is clearly in some way connected to Brander in his
eyes,
right?
Like you must know of Brander.
You must be working with Brander.
He's going to stare daggers at her and focus on every single thing she is doing and about
to do and is going to ready
an action.
So he holds to
and he doesn't hold, he readies an action.
Okay. Okay. Okay.
Alright. Gives me pause.
Metra, you're up. You're on the
balcony. You've got dust in your mouth.
What are you going to do? Metra's going to cast Scorching Ray.
There you go.
First ray is a 22 against touch.
That is a hit.
Let's roll all three rays.
Yeah, yeah.
Second ray is a 16 against touch.
Also a hit.
Nice.
And the third ray is almost certainly a miss, a 12 against touch.
That is a miss, yes.
Okay, so two Scorching Rays.
Rays. How many damage are those rays doing at this level? Well, it's is a miss, yes. Okay, so two scorching rays. Two rays.
How many damage are those rays doing at this level?
Well, it's always the same, actually.
You just get more rays.
Yes, it's 46 per hit.
Okay, so 86 damage.
Not two shabs.
No save.
22 points of damage.
Nice.
Fire damage.
Okay, all right.
I'll tell you what.
You guys are chipping away here.
And Metro's going to charge down to the balcony to kind of get on top of her. damage nice fire damage okay all right i'll tell you what you guys are chipping away here and metro
is going to charge down the balcony to kind of get like over on top of her she'll take a move
action on the balcony uh it's bartholomew keswick's journey roll the bleed damage oh yeah a natural
five failed nice another one point come on oh come on just kill this guy already man this guy's
son of a bitch he's already all. All right, so only one point.
So, yeah, still.
That is so.
One D6 bleed is usually brutal.
Yeah, yeah.
That's horrible.
That could have been 12 points.
It was two.
It would have been that round.
That was like rolling snake eyes.
It is her turn.
Okay, so you did something there.
I mean, she doesn't know that.
So she is going to do something. You did something there. She doesn't know that.
She is going to do something.
She's going to reach out
and touch
one of
the three of you.
She can't reach me. I'm up top.
It just looks on the map like you're right there.
Either Jimmer or Adriel. I'm up top. Oh, you're up top. You were just, it just looks on the map like you're right there. So either Jimmer or Adriel.
I'll roll a d4.
One, two, Jimmer.
Three, four, Adriel.
Four, Adriel.
Oh, boy.
She reaches out and attempts to cast a touch spell on you.
So that's going to be a melee touch attack.
What do you do?
I counter the spell.
Oh, baller.
All right.
Do you know the rules of counter spell?
Nope.
I've read them 10 times, and I have no idea what they are.
I'm not exaggerating.
Now's the time to try it.
It's only 138.
It's so brutally difficult.
But basically, I think I kind of get it.
So I believe that a normal counterspell is you have to do a spellcraft check to identify the spell, etc., etc.
But I'm not trying to counter it with the same spell.
Okay.
I'm just casting Dispel Magic Greater on her spell as she casts it.
Okay. So it's kind of like just readying Dispel Magic Greater on her spell as she casts it. Okay, so it's kind of like just readying Dispel Magic Greater.
Yeah, exactly.
It's not really the true counter-strike.
Correct.
But when you use Dispel Magic, it is cast just against the caster.
So I'm trying to read how it works, but I can't quite figure it out.
So I think the best...
Don't worry about the whole idea of a counterspell.
Just worry about the spell magic.
I think the best way to do it would be 11 plus the caster level of your spell.
And I would roll my caster level against that.
So a counterspell, when you have the spell, there's no roll.
You succeed.
But when you're dispelling that when
you're using dispel magic against some other spell you still have to roll a check so the check is
going to be my caster level against your cash level but you get a plus 11 bonus over me essentially
okay uh so 11 plus her caster level that's all it is 11 plus her caster level
Is the DC
That you have to roll
Yes
That I have to hit
But I get a plus 4
Because of greater dispel magic
That's the only difference
Okay
Roll
28
You made it Yeah Oh man That was a 10 Roll. 28.
You made it.
Yeah!
Oh, man.
That was a 10.
10 on the die. That's good news, because if you had failed, that would mean she's like a 17th level caster.
Yeah, exactly.
I was very concerned.
We can just turn our weapons on ourselves.
But yeah, Silvermane just silently in the background.
Nobody can hear anything.
Just working his hands.
She was going to cast Sands of Time.
Oh, my God!
I know that spell!
That is a great spell!
Immediately age Adriel.
Yeah, that's...
How old are you?
70.
70.
You'd be a middle-aged old man.
Your strength, your dex, your con would all go down.
And you'd start withering in front of us.
That's like Indiana Jones' Last Crusade.
Yes, exactly.
But he knows these kind of evil people, what they're trying to do.
He waits on it and then just stops it from happening.
So she goes to cast that.
She knows that you're the one that stopped her to do it.
Yeah.
And she just looks at you.
Oh, man.
And bows her head ever so slightly and takes a five-foot step back. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And she just looks at you. Oh, man. And bows her head ever so slightly
and takes a five foot step back.
Oh, yeah.
Okay. It is
Adriel's turn. Holy
frickin'
amole!
You better kill her.
It's time to try
it. Let's
try it out.
It's time to cast One of my favorite spell names
Ever after Sands of Time
This is a pretty good one
This one is called Contagious Flame
That sounds real good
Going to fire three rays
We'll talk about what they do after
I start by rolling
Some ranged touch
Attacks
The first attack is a 21 Touch I start by rolling some ranged touch attacks.
The first attack is a 21 touch.
That is a hit.
Nice.
Nice.
I should have taken that five foot step.
The first ray does 12 points of fire damage.
Okay.
The second ray. The seren ray. Yes. Okay. The second Ray. The Seren Ray.
Yes! 26.
Oh, yeah.
That'll do
16 points of fire damage.
Okay. The third Ray
will be a 15
against Touch AC. Ray Liotta, her Touch
AC is 15.
Oh, my
God! 14 points of damage. A lot of Rays. You excited? AC is 15. Oh, my God.
14 points of damage.
A lot of raise.
You excited?
A lot of raise in this combat.
Okay.
And then finally, in a desperate gambit, Adriel charges at her, not for the charge effect,
but just in order to get...
Oh, but it's a 10-foot radius.
How can I do this?
Yeah.
Oh, this is rough.
What was that?
That just is three...
It's a three-race thing.
It's similar to what Matthew Kessler...
It's a spell.
It's called Contagious Flame.
It's a standard act.
It's a spell, yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
Stay on my ground, then.
That's the end of my turn.
That's a hell of a turn.
That's a pretty good turn.
Pretty good goddamn turn. I don't know what else you could do that turn.
Yeah, really, really good turn.
You really shouldn't be bummed out by that turn.
That's a really good turn. You're really beating yourself up, Grant.
Grant's used to like 70 points of damage in one shot.
When he does less than 120 in a round, he's really bummed out.
You've ruined the game for yourself.
The thing I want to do is dispel the blade barrier so that it
no longer threatens standard action.
Standard action, yeah.
Can't do it. I hear you, but
don't be upset with yourself.
You've done good.
Goes to the next round. It's Willem Kesswick's turn.
I mean, you got nothing, man.
Stay alive. Yeah, no, he's just
standing there, slowly breathing, looking
at the body of Bartholomew
Through the blade
Just watching like
I love
Picturing that shot
Can't you just see it
Seeing his face
Like through the blades
Like worrying
Like just seeing
That look on his face
And you can still see like
Yeah
And I gotta say
And I gotta say
He has other plans in mind
Beyond just
Bartholomew's body
This is preventing him
From something else
Which I'll reveal Once these blades are down Interesting It'somew's body. This is preventing him from something else, which I'll reveal once these blades
are down. Interesting. It's Jimmer's turn.
Jimmer is
going to step up and
he's going to
do a five foot step, do a full attack.
Right out of the blades.
Straight into her business.
Full attack.
Good night, nurse.
Jimmer. Power attack is still on
First roll
Is a 5
But I am going to use my
Reliable strike ability
He's got every ability of the world
To re-roll
To re-roll and attack
Damage roll
It's an 8
I bet you still hit That's a 29 an attack damage roll. It's an 8.
I bet you still hit.
That's a 29.
That's a hit.
Yeah.
She's got good AC, though.
Oh, she does?
Yeah.
30 points of damage.
Okay, still alive.
Okay.
Wow, she's no joke.
Fast. Second attack.
Second attack.
That is a 29 again.
That's a hit.
All right.
And that is 26 points of damage.
Okay.
Still alive.
Okay.
Oh, my God.
Last one.
You built a badass.
Third attack.
She's boss.
That is a 26.
AC 25.
Yes!
Oh!
25 points of damage.
So that last shot just cuts through her
and you just hit her.
And she crumbles.
Yeah!
Who's laughing now?
Who's laughing now?
Ain't nothing funny about that, is there?
Her next move was gaseous form
and get out of there.
Oh! I should have waited
for my dispel for that round.
Oh, yeah, totally, yeah.
It goes to Silverman.
There's no other combatants, right, besides Bartholomew down.
You know what?
He's just going to...
He also has dispel magic prepared.
Okay.
So he's just going to, like, try to wave a hand
and just dispel the blades. Okay. So he's just going to try to wave a hand and just dispel the blades.
Okay. So
you're 13th level? Correct.
Caster, so DC
24. DC 24.
And he makes it. Nice.
So he just washes a hand and he
wipes away the blades. Do you move it all?
And he starts walking.
Metra. So it's 20 feet.
Metra just starts trying to
Dig the dust out of her mouth
Roll his blade damage
Bartholomew
Five
Five
He stabilizes
But five
Permanently kills him
He had two
Oh man
Hit points left
Oh my god
I mean two
Till permadeath.
Wow.
So the blade barrier goes down, and just you see him go.
Yeah.
The Keswick line has ended.
Oh, my God.
And the battle ends.
Sir Will looks at his body just for a moment and then
just furious walks past it up the stairs to where he was sitting as we walked into this room
and just works with all of his effort you tell me if it's successful or not to rip down the corrupted banner behind
the chair the the fly yeah it's like it's a wooden plaque and he pulls it just rips it down yeah yeah
totally now that he's like up on his tippy toes yeah now ariel is uh uh adrian what's your name? Adriel. Adriel has given him back his strength.
Rips that banner down.
Turns around, looks down at everybody.
I'm sorry for what has happened here.
I thank you all for your bravery in facing this awfulness.
for your bravery in facing this awfulness.
My mother has escaped to where I do not know,
but we must flee this place before the armies of Highbury
try to take this room again under false pretenses.
I do not trust myself to take their loyalty.
They will not simply look at me and believe that this place is in the rightful hands.
Son, you don't think they'd follow you after I built these two are dead?
Well, I don't know that they know it yet, and i wouldn't risk any of your lives that's all i
that's all i'm saying we did not come here alone the knights of ozum are still loyal to you and
your family and they're here as well the knights of ozum are here yes oh yeah they are his eyes
light up we can hear them now will runs to the door like the throne room door that you were
saying at the front where the red carpet door That you were saying At the front
Where the red carpet is
You're running
And as you're running
It's
Like someone's trying
To batter it down
And all of a sudden
The door splinters
And batters open
And like a dozen
Nights of ozone
Yes
Yes
Calrion like comes through
Oh I love it
But the look on her face is not one of like
uh joy she sees you willamette and she sees that you have obviously your group has defeated but like
she's just like
and all the knights are covered in blood.
She's like, is your mission, is your mission complete?
Yes, we have defeated my brother.
His bride was an awful creature, and she has been defeated thanks to these people and he turns obviously
and points at the four of them oh hell weren't nothing weren't nothing i love it metro spits
out spits out dust weren't nothing uh she's like come with me and she brings you to the door
of looking out past the the throne room door and you just see a battlefield of the knights of
osum still fighting and they're just fighting hordes of undead oh my god what they keep falling
and then like will rise up again to fight and as far as you can see almost all of them are wearing
the sigils of Highbury
scraped out with the
death's head fly drawn
over it.
It's like your brother
and his bride
though
they are dead
the damage is done.
Seems as if they've murdered the entire court
and raised them again as an undead army.
This ergoth hoa worship.
Highbury has fallen.
There is no saving it.
No. Highbury must not must not fall
it's over
and you look out
and you see like
sure if another group
were to come charging in
if Gandalf was to just
fucking appear
and make it work
like there would be a way
but like
they just
the undead keep falling
and then minutes later
you'll see them rise up again
to fire.
It's like, I can't imagine if this worship is spread elsewhere.
What we are facing.
We've staved off the battle for now, but we must flee.
So, Will, you must leave Highbury behind.
Fuck.
Silvermane will, on the chalkboard, just write to Calvary Ann and hold it out to her.
Flee.
The bassist from Red Hot Chili Peppers? I don't understand.
Use your words.
He erases the A.
Writes another E.
Oh, run. Yes, yes.
No, yes, yes.
You should run, yes no yes yes you should run
yes yes
that's
that's we should
yes
we can get out of here
we must move quickly
are you ready
she looks to all of you
and you just like
run out there
and imagine like slow motion
just like
hacking against undead.
Like,
and the Knights of Ozim are backing you up and you're all working in unison
to fight these undead carving away out from Highbury,
which is now lost.
Fuck!
Highbury's fallen.
Highbury's fallen.
Emmet's dead.
Frederick,
the oldest brother Dead
Dead
Bartholomew
Bartholomew
Dead
Benric
Benric
Dead
Our line is dead
All the true born sons
Except Sir Willamette
Except Sir Willamette
The sole living heir
And
Perhaps Sophia still lives
Yeah she got away
She fled
Yes
And
Sophia
Guys just
We will find you.
You're fighting through this.
And then that scene fades out.
And we come back to Minderhall's Cathedral.
What?
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
I remember
that now. Farron,
Ralphio,
the giants,
and other
various humanoids that have started to
congregate here
to rebuild Minder Hall's
Cathedral,
all are just
frozen.
Like Farron said said something wrong but baron pembroke faraza and dagrath appear to be unaffected oh the doors open up And a figure
Clad all in black
Oh my god
A hood up over its face
Slowly walks up the steps
Into the cathedral
Head bowed
Can't see the person's face
But you know that voice
my old friends
some new
tilts his head
at Dalgrith
I understand
you have a
monumental battle on the horizon.
Scarecrow has lived for a long, long time,
but I feel as if some of you may have the power to defeat her.
Everyone wants to live forever
But I personally always found undeath so uncouth
I thought you were going to say so uncool
Uncool
Just lame
It's just shitty
It's just kind of shitty
What good is eternal life if you're not there to enjoy it?
There mentally.
There spiritually.
There fully, physically. physically I've spent the greater part of my life
consuming bits
and pieces of relics
using the world's greatest artifacts
to my advantage
capturing the life forces of those
who are destined for greatness
and through all of these things Life forces of those who are destined for greatness.
And through all of these things, I have found the path to escaping time itself.
Securing the essence of an object is quite simple. Acquire it, or have others acquire it for you,
as your party has done quite masterfully for me thus far,
looks to Baron.
Do that,
and its power is yours.
With living beings,
it's much more involved. us. We're living beings.
It's much more involved.
The difficulty
lies in choosing
the perfect time.
He raises his hands up and you see this just
pale skin
kind of sneak
out from behind a robe.
It's like harvesting fruit from a tree. You have to know just when
it's ripe enough. Young Calabrus was ready at the dam. His mind full of burgeoning knowledge,
obviously, but also full of not only innocence, but hope.
Qualities that perished in me long, long ago.
Della, who perished right here in this cathedral,
spent her life standing at the precipice of light and dark,
and right when she got pushed to the edge of darkness, she fell.
She can no longer work for me.
You can.
What? I tell you this, though.
What?
I tell you this, though.
She has already done more in death than she could have ever done in her long, long life.
I fucking knew it. Brando just keeps walking forward, and as he does so, he slowly undoes the clasp of his robe and removes his cowl.
The robe falls to the ground to reveal an abomination of a body.
You know, back when that fight went down, some of you saw when he struck Agrimosh.
You mean Garn away?
Or no, back in the cathedral.
Yeah, back in the cathedral, right here.
You saw when he struck Agrimosh against a pendant on his chest,
a chest that looked as if it had armor growing from underneath the cathedral. Yeah, back in the cathedral, right here. You saw when he struck Aggramosh against a pendant on his chest, a chest that looked as if it had armor growing
from underneath the skin. You now
see a body made up of not only
that strange carapace,
but also, like,
patchwork bits and pieces of
white, almost translucent
skin. This fucking
guy. Going all the way up to his
face, which smiles from beneath a shock of blue hair.
A face almost perfectly stitched down the middle
that is half his
and half Della's.
What?
What the fuck?
You gotta be kidding me.
Oh, my God.
We'll see you next time.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Shit! I fucking knew you were doing that shit. You gotta be kidding me Oh my god We'll see you next time Oh my god
I fucking knew you were doing that
Oh my god
Lunatic
Oh my god
I'm so sad
I'm not having fun anymore
I'm just sad all the time
I'm just sad all the time. I'm not sad about what's funny. It's awful. I'm not sad about what's funny. I'm just sad all the time.
It's awful. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission.
In the darkness, you hear the sound of heavy breathing, panting, followed intermittently by the sound of loud thumps.
It's like... In a flash, lights come up on a body running away from us.
A massive back, legs the size of tree trunks, working hard to run away from something or someone.
The creature turns back to look behind it, whatever is after it, and we see that it's a frost giant.
A large, horned
helm upon its head.
A thick beard still
crusted with ice.
As we start to see the body more clearly, we notice
that he has a dozen or so arrows
sticking out of him.
Several in his back, the backs of his legs,
where his shoulder joint meets
his upper back muscles, and he's just doing
everything he can to just keep fighting.
Suddenly, a sound rings out another.
An arrow catches the giant right in its mid-back,
so deep it may have very well punctured a lung from behind.
And the giant just collapses,
gurgling and wheezing his last breaths as he lays on the ground.
Other than those sounds, for a moment, the forest is otherwise completely still and silent.
You son of a bitch! Mr. Coyne emerges from the forest,
walks up to the giant,
looks at him for a second, studies him,
and then reaches his hand into a bag tied around its belt,
pulls out coins and other sundries
that may catch a nice penny.
But then he pulls out a strange chunk of something,
maybe a weapon, maybe a magical item.
It looks completely battered and destroyed.
But he runs his hands over a word etched in the metal.
It just says Della. hands over a word etched in the metal. Just says
Della.
Picks it up
and he looks it over.
So, always
knew I'd see you again.
My love.
And the giant
is still wheezing,
gurgling its last, trying to crawl away.
Nestor, like, places his boot right in its back and looks down at him.
Giants.
It's not me old dad used to say.
They love to run, but they're too big to hide.
And Nestor levels the gun, takes it in his
hand, levels it right at the dying giant's
head in a way I
saw Baron do so many times before.
Oh, fuck.
He looks at him
and just says,
bang!
Blackout.
This is some bullshit.
Bullshit.
Blackout.
This is some bullshit.
This is some bullshit.