The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 207 - You've Got Chainmail

Episode Date: May 14, 2019

The new party comes to terms with the location of the elite giant training academy and what to do with Skirkatla's armor. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. With the forces of the tomb finally defeated. You've dealt a serious blow to the Storm Tyrant's army by killing now. Urathash. Urathash and Skirkotla. And disbanding their armies. And disbanding their armies. An even greater evil waits.

Other situation you have is that with Scarecrow dead, you now have her gear, specifically her armor, which Brander has demanded of you. And now the heroes have a choice. He swears he's not our enemy, but yet

feels like he's playing a fight. And I'm perfectly willing to fight this person, but I'm just trying to act tactically here and see what our best options are. Or make a deal with the devil. Do we give Brander this armor? I don't know if we can even touch this man.

He's so powerful. Or it may be an opportunity to barter, but I don't like making deals with people that evil. The adventure continues. What negotiation is there with a man who wears my daughter's face?

No. Greetings, my friends. It's your boy, Grant Berger, a.k.a. Baron Ashpeak. I'm going to keep this brief so you can get straight to the action. Go! We're one week away from PaizoCon and our live show at Numo's in downtown Seattle, and I'm excited. If you're coming to PaizoCon, be sure to head to our events Warhorn. If you want to GM or play in Pathfinder or Starfinder games,

that will be held at Glass Cannon HQ. Just go to warhorn.net and search glass cannon we'll also be doing tabletop free play in there all day and night with board games card games and maybe some gcp after dark where the night is dark and full of terrors with that out of the way holy crap we're done with book four and as axel rose once said where do we go now well we go straight to book five starting now with episode 207 can you believe it oh i can't can you believe that we finished book four you gotta believe you gotta believe you gotta believe tug mcgraw over here what's up do you know how many episodes book four was too many ballpark

i know the answer two it was more than two many many 72 72 very close very close 64 no 74 episodes oh man essentially 74 132 was like dealing with emla's death della's death and brander's body spoilers nestor's double cross that was the start to me that's the start of book five that's like you know you've you've you beat the boss excuse me book four yeah that that that to me is truly the start of book four so there's 132 so 74 episodes let's take some bids on how many eps you think book five will be now i'll tell you this i don't think it's going to be like book four again. I knew going in book four was going to be a piece. No, I don't think so. I really don't think so.

I think that this, you know, this is going to be very new for us. This is very high level combat. These are level 13 characters going up against CR 13, 14, 15, sometimes maybe even 16 encounters. You know, this is going to require a lot of us to really stretch our limits of what we're comfortable with. I mean, Skid, did you get to book

five of... We actually got to book six. You did get to book six. Of Rise of the Lord of the Lords, yeah. Alright, so you played through book five. Joe, you played through book five of Council of Thieves. I did, yeah. We started book five of J. Regan. And you know what? Book five of Council of thieves in my game was shorter was markedly shorter than book four which was the longest and most epic book

of the series yeah yeah i felt like jade rings like sped up like because i don't know there's something about high level combat that lends itself and this is some of the criticisms that you get with uh the mythical combat it's like there's some things in high-level combat that kind of lend themselves to like initiative wins out. It's like the initiative rolls come down. And if you get that blast power out first and you get the first full attack actions off, it's like boom, boom, boom. And people just die like so fast. So encounters tend to be a little shorter if you know the rules.

They tend to be a little shorter. you know the rules uh they tend to be a little shorter i'm gonna say 55 episodes wow well no one knows better than you well i'm just picking a number out of my ass i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna go under i'm gonna go a harder the under yeah i'm gonna go 41 episodes wow 41 yeah okay okay Book one was like 29. But book two was what? I think it was like 30 and then 40 and then 50 and then 74. Yeah. I'm saying we're going to speed it up. Okay.

I do think it's going to be faster. Grant, what do you think? I'm going to go with 48. 48. Okay. Oh, gee, this would be great if we got this done under a year. Matthew, you're the classic pessimist. The classic 5'2 pessimist.

The ones you read about. Like you read about. I'm going to pick 49. Oh. Just because it's perfect. Oh, wow. Just a screw over Grant. Thanks so much.

Wow. I hope you bust big time buddy One dollar Grant he's not going to remember these wagers in three episodes But people will Skip what are you thinking I'm going to go with the Mets He just mentioned the famous Mets Saying

You gotta believe You gotta believe 1962 Inaugural year of the Mets saying the... You gotta believe. You gotta believe. That's the number. 1962. 62. Inaugural year of the Mets. 62 episodes. So it's taking the over. Okay. It'll be interesting to see. I thought you were going to have 41.

The number of the great Tom Seaver. Or 42. The number of wins that they got the year that they were... Didn't I just pick 42? I did, right right get a room you two oh and watch the mets together in the room oh no it's 40 it was actually 41 i'm gonna be really interested to see how it all plays out i intend to do no role play in the book so i think that's gonna speed it up yeah that'll be good like i'll shut down anytime somebody starts role

playing i'm just gonna shut it down yeah yeah how are you gonna do that joe i don't know i'll have to role play it i'll figure it out yeah you'll figure it out in a moment yeah i don't know i don't know it's gonna be very interesting i mean there was a lot of information just dumped on you obviously you're not aware of the vault of thorns information um but for Baron especially, it's one thing to go in there and defeat the Witchfires. It's another thing to pick up the remains of your friends and all of their belongings. I'm assuming you guys picked up every single bit of their belongings, anything they were carrying.

And then you take Skirkotler's... And their remains. And their remains, yeah. Put some pimp brick in a jar. You grab all of Skirkotla's stuff, including her armor that Brander specifically asked you for. Then you go into her cenotaph and you see the date of her rise from the dead. Sorry, what is that word? Cenotaph?

Yeah, what's that word? Sorry, what is that word? Cenotaph? Yeah, what's that word? It's a monument to someone who is buried elsewhere, especially one commemorating people who died in a war. So a cenotaph is for someone who died elsewhere. Maybe they didn't recover their body or something. It's like the tomb of the unknown soldier or something.

That's a cenotaph. Yes, yes. Yeah. An empty tomb or monument erected in honor of a person or group of people whose remains are elsewhere. Or the initial tomb for a person who has since been reinterred elsewhere. In her case, she was reinterred back on Earth. And then you took her out.

Baron uses his stone cutting. I was very excited to give you Since you've been asking For 206 episodes Man it feels good But I think it's the second time It came in handy And you find a room Full of treasure

As well as a map To a dormant volcano Where there's an elite Training academy And the volcano Is called Ashbeak That's not exactly What I was hoping for i was hoping that

it may have been more of like a summer vacation destination the ashpeak mountain where i found out everything that's going on with my characters yeah yeah like after book six we would go to ashpeak and close out your story like a hawaiian island right Tiki bars. All I could think during the Skirkotla fight when death was staring you in the face 17 times. I'm like, is Baron going to die in the room? One room away from finding out about Ashley. That's all I could think. Oh, man. All I could think.

And I'm like, this is unbelievable poetry if this happens. I still wake up in cold sweats just when you rolled those D6s to see who you're going to attack with the witch flames. I could have died. My wife's like, what's the matter? What's wrong with you? And I'm like, don't worry, nerd stuff. It was even. It was even.

All I could think was Dalgrith walking in there and reading and finding Ashpeak and then just watching you be sad. Oh, brutal. Brut oh brutal brutal well it's a new book i want to jump in i really want to set the tone for this book book five this is very exciting we're two books away from finishing this story finishing this podcast and closing the business down yes all right so liquidation sale coming up in three years everything must go everything must go i want to start this book off the right way by setting the tone i know i've been a little chatty kathy over here i was gonna say lately but i got i got one more really long fucking epic narrated by troy it's not that long

but i we gotta set the tone man you can write that long bro not that long that was four or five pages that was your turn China voice Fucking 15 minutes I want you all Especially you at home Yeah you You know who I'm talking about I see you right there Put your blinker off

You don't Close your eyes Pull over to the side of the road Close your eyes I want you to imagine The sound of horse hooves Trotting over Another episode Of Joe's Total Competence hooves trotting over another episode of

Joe's Total Competence I really love that I'm looking at the waveform in our podcast there's a giant blob of sound there's never a moment when that sound will be appropriate on this show

the way farb looks like the big red furry monster from warner brothers the bugs buddy he has a name okay he does uh rufus i think it is i want you to imagine the sound of horse hooves trotting over earth and stone. Matthew, give me a little foley work on that. I'm not a foley artist. Okay, yeah, that was pretty bad. The sounds continue. Where are my coconuts?

What, riddle on a horse? The sounds continue, and then we see the actual horses, just their legs. It looks like three horses riding side by side. We pan up, and astride the horses are three Shawanti warriors. Two men and one woman. They're garbed in heavy furs with long bows at their back. Behind them is a wooden cart drawn by another female rider, and inside the cart are several Shawanti women,

some young, some very old. As they ride along, they all see the skeletal remains of a horse over towards the side of this pathway, and they bow their heads as they pass. Side by side, they ride in silence through a narrow pass in the rock where clearly some sort of barricade once existed,

and then out into an open mountain wasteland. The leader, what appears to be the leader, holds his hand up, and the rest of the group stops. He then points in the distance to a massive cathedral built right into the mountain itself. The enormous double doors at the front of the Cathedral of Minderhall

stand wide open, letting sunlight spill into the nave. As Farron and her budding congregation of both small folk and giants go about their daily duties rebuilding this cathedral, Farron hears a sound and turns to see, silhouetted by the sun, three mounted warriors on horseback, just outside the entryway. It's probably been a long time since Farron has glimpsed Shawanti, but she immediately knows why they're here. As the warriors dismount their horses and enter, Farron moves slowly towards a side room in the cathedral,

opens the door, three mops fall out and a bottle of Windex. God damn it. She just kicks the cleaning supplies back in. Come on, man. Come on, man. Come on, Farron.

Sorry the cleaning guy's off this week. And she pulls out the body of four bears. You know what, Matthew? You didn't have to pull the mic closer to your yes i did it's really rude imagine a giant fumbling with my pledge kicking pledge bottle sorry it's like i know it's here somewhere i'm sorry i'm sorry she pulls out the body of four it's the lack of respect that hurts the most no you worked really hard on it and then he just shat on your face yeah it's the pulls out the body instead of just like also i i oh oh here it is while i feel terribly for joe i also

deeply identify with this every time i have to use a mop in my house it's just always just things fall on me i don't know how to use it and then i beg my wife to do it this is an indictment against badly organized closets more than anything yes yes exactly the giants are not immune to this sort of no small world problem this is an expose i mean like in the best 60 minutes tradition well after kicking all of the supplies Aside she pulls out four bears He's wrapped in linens It's very regal

He's got some weird stains on the linens But that's not the point That's not the point of this He walks towards She walks towards the warriors holding the body As she stops before the leader in the center, there is a moment of stillness. There's a thick tension permeating the air

as these ancient enemies, Giant and Shawanti, stand now in this sacred place under a flag of truce, reflecting on yet another death the war between their people has brought. The center horseman motions for the slag giant to join him outside, so they walk out together, and the congregation slowly follows to watch at the doorway

as the warriors and Farron walk down those long steps of the cathedral to the ground where the wagon awaits. Out of the back of the wagon, the female rider helps an elderly woman make the high step down to the earth. The older woman is short and stooped with age, but somehow her mere presence seems to rival even Farron's size. She cranes her neck so that she can look Farron in the eye. The two pause for a moment before the old woman

nods once and steps aside. Farron respectfully carries the body to the wagon and gently loads it in while the flanking warriors keep their hands low,

no doubt on weapons unseen beneath their furs. Once the body is loaded, the old woman, refusing help from the younger woman this time, pulls herself into the back of the wagon, sits on a crude bench, and just rests her hands on Forbear's body. She then turns to Farron and speaks in giant to her. The Boneyard has become a training ground where death walks with blade in hand. The dormant armies of hell are finally erupting. Yet all pale in comparison to the tyrant who rides the storm.

She looks up at the cathedral, then back to Farron and her congregation. All will crumble. All will be lost. The rider gives the reins a whip, and Farron stands aside as two of the warriors trot out ahead of the wagon, while one lingers to guard the rear. And as the Shawanti fade from sight,

back into Minderhall's valley, Farron can hear the old woman's mournful song echoing across the valley. Now find yourselves back in the secret room attached to Skirkotla's Cenotaph. You've now learned that an elite training academy of giants exists

in a dormant volcano sitting high in the Mindspin Mountains called Ash Peak. You think back. Baron was the only one that was there of Fijimon talking about going south. What an honor it would be

to be sent south. Now you know where south is. Whatever happened to Fiji, Mom? He's dead. Why are we laughing? Because people don't vaccinate their kids. It's measles. He's a scare guy.

Yeah, he died of measles. He's a measles It's a scare guy Yeah he died of measles He's a measles outbreak I don't know why I'm laughing It's not funny Hey man That's what happens Yeah It's not funny at all

Frost Giants have very low intelligence Did that also Because you'd have to have Extremely low intelligence To not vaccinate your children To not vaccinate your fucking children Yes So that's how Fijimond died

There you go Have you gotten your booster on this? I haven't. I haven't, no. But my son just got his at nine months because we're traveling internationally. And I was like, all right, normally you get it a year. I was like, we better get this because there are a lot of dumb frost giants out there. They're ruining this for everybody else.

So, yes, sadly, now we know the fate of Fidgimon. Oh, man. The Flat Earther, too. That was the kicker. It's got a lot of weird thoughts. It wasn't Fidgimon that was the Flat Earther or the Anti-Vaxxer. He just lived in a community. It's all about herd of community. Yeah, right.

It's all about herd of unity. Yeah, exactly. According to this map, Oh, man. this volcano looks to be over 100 miles south of Skirgar. And you can also tell from studying the map that the entrance is located, looks to be located on the western side of the mountain, somewhere near the base.

So you're armed with a lot of information. I want to hand you out a map that I've been waiting to hand out to you guys for a long, long time. Oh, wow. We have not gotten handed a map in 72 episodes. At least. This is a map of the Mindspin

Mountains. This is from map of the Mindspin Mountains. This is from the Giant Slayer map folio. And the reason I couldn't hand it out is because Ash Peak is on there. Oh.

Wow. I think back in our Tumblr days or something, I might even have posted half of this map once to show the distance between True Now

and like Ghostlight Marsh and everything's on there. You see True Now up top? You see True Now and Ghostlight Marsh, and everything's on there. You see True Now up top. You see True Now. The river Esk. Ghostlight Marsh. Yeah, River Esk.

And then there's... Red Lake Fort's on here, too. Nargrim's Tomb. Wow. We really could have used this. Yanderhoff. Yeah, Yanderhoff's there. The Bloodsworn Veil.

Corvosa. Hey, Corvosa. Corvosa. Yeah, how close it is. Yeah, you knew that Bloodsworn Ve. Corvosa. Hey, Corvosa. Corvosa. Yeah, you knew that Bloodsworn Vale separated Skelton, all of these places from Corvosa. Skiergard could basically be a winter retreat for people in Corvosa. Yeah, like the Poconos.

Totally. We're going to go, too, but it's Skiergard. But look at how far you've gone. Look at's brochure See Red Lake Fort is up there Yeah So you see True Now goes up And the Kestrel turns to the S

There's Red Lake Fort So you guys went all the way up there Then you came back And made your way to Nargrim's Tomb You see that? Yeah Shinemon's Fortune is there And then there's Minderhall's Valley

From there You decided to go to Yanderhof Before heading straight through Bloodsworn Vale, where you met the Shawanti, where Lork was reincarnated. Then from there, you went to the only reasonable settlement where you could do some business, Skelt. And then from there, straight to Skirgard. Now, if you look continuing south. Wow. There is not a lot going on between Skirgard and Ashpeak.

There looks to be two settlements. Glimmerhold, which is a dwarven city that is kind of smack dab in the southern part of the Mindspins. And then there is Kragodon, which is sort of to the east of the Mind Springs here. And that is a Dwarven Sky Citadel. Oh, my God. I want to go to a Sky Citadel. What is a Dwarven Sky Citadel? One of the last ten remaining citadels.

So the dwarves were underground when the Starstone came to town, basically. And when the earth shook, they realized that they could come out. I'm paraphrasing a lot of... Quest for Sky. Quest for Sky. And they wanted to come out. But doing so also left... But they had to fight through the orcs to get there.

Right. And it also left the world open to the Darklands, because they were very closely connected to the Darklands in their underground mountain holds. So of all the Sky Citadels that still remain, I think 10 of them are still under dwarven control. And didn't we have, was Rag from a place that used to be a Sky Citadel and was taken down?

I think Rag was from, he fought in the fighting pits of Urgeir, which is in Ork City. Urgeir, that's in Ork City. Yeah, I think that used to be. Urgeir used to be a Sky Citadel. It might might have and then yeah now it's it's taken over by orcs yeah basically the crocodile is a big deal the orcs fought they had to fight through or the dwarves had to fight through the orcs to get to the surface and in doing so the orcs kept falling back and falling back and falling back until they were on the surface right and the dwarves were on

the surface and now their war uh took to the surface and a. Right. And the dwarves were on the surface, and now their war took to the surface. And a lot of people blame the dwarves. They're basically big fortresses, right? Yeah. Yeah. Big underground fortresses. If you ever played any Skyrim, it's the Dwerger, or Dwerger, or how do you say it?

Dwerger. Dwerger. Aren't those, there's like, there's one level that is a perfect Dwerger sky city. Yeah, it's the abandoned places. No, no, you're talking to Dwemer. Dwemer. Dwemer Ruins, yeah.

Not Dreg. Dwemer. Dwemer? Anyways, Kragadon would be a big, big deal. Glimmerhold might be a little bit harder to reach where it's

smack dab in the mountains, but you could, because I'm assuming you're going to want a settlement. Glimmerhold looks like Helm's Deep. Like, it's, like,

tucked into the mountains like very deeply. The mountains all behind it. And there's only one way in, one way out kind of thing. Yeah, and you would think Kragadan is probably very similar, very hard to reach but at least you could travel you wouldn't have to travel through the mountains to get to, you know, the main area

around there. Whereas Glimmerhold, you'd have to go straight through the mountains from Skirgard. Can we travel by river? I mean, it looks like the best ways to travel are by river. Yeah, I don't think it's impossible. We could also travel via air. Right. Yeah, you could travel via air.

Yeah, now things are a little bit different. You know, gone are the days when you could just blink to Skelt or Minderhall's Cathedral. Now, even though Metra clearly has the ability to teleport, she's never been to either of those two places. You have to have at least viewed a location once to use teleport, unless you have greater teleport. Now, she has been to True Now, but knowing that Gell is gone and that Sir Will and this other Ashpeak are gone.

By the way, you didn't even mention the other Ashpeak. I don't know if you did that on purpose or not. What other Ashpeak? The other Ashpeak, Adriel Ashpeak. Right, he was an Ashpeak. Right. How soon we forget. in the other ash peak i don't know if you did that on purpose or not um what other ash the other ash peak adriel ash peak right he was an ash right how soon we forget i forgot he was an ash peak but only six episodes ago man he was kind of mean to me there was a time when going to true now seemed like a great idea right now it's not i don't know you guys can do whatever you want but i don't see there's also a lake not too far from ash peak the usk lake in the usk off the usk river they might have a nice little you know retreat there b&b well b&b we can get involved get ourselves a pontoon the question that keeps a couple cases

of miller light you love a pontoon i've never met someone who loves a pontoon as much as you oh man he can fish and swim. What the hell? And drink a hundred beers and get sunburned. There's no group of people that could use a break at a lake house more than this particular group of people. That's 100% true. Can't you just give us a couple days on the lake? For God's sake, if you watch Star Trek Next Generation, every other episode is just like, well, not much to do this week. Let's just hang out and go to the holodeck.

It doesn't really end well any of those times. No, but still. I mean, it ends fine. There's plenty of downtime. They play poker? Yeah, they play poker. We're not going to finish at 42 episodes without any downtime. Let's go.

Let's get this show on the road. Which river are we taking? I just wanted to point out the incredible amount of downtime on Star Trek Next Generation. Yeah, agreed. I mean, space is a vast frontier. Yeah, there's a lot of travel involved. I can tell you right now, just looking at the map, assuming a base land speed of 30 feet, it would take over 12 days to hike through the mountains to get to Ash Peak on the map.

If you just went straight there, if you want to stop at a settlement, which I would assume you'd want to do to gear up to find out what the scuttlebutt is and whatnot, then you're, you're pretty much your two options are glimmer hold and Kragadan. I mean, it's not like the world is going to end tomorrow.

You've dealt a serious blow to the storm tyrants army by killing. Now, uh, what was the guy from book three? I can't even think. Urathosh. Yeah, Urathosh and Skirkotla. And disbanding their armies. And disbanding their armies, but this elite training academy, the best of the best, still

exists. It's just so crazy that there are these little settlements that seem to be on the side of the small folk and then just dotted among these mountains from from north to south are just little outcroppings where these giants are it just seems crazy yeah can i ask one other question this may be asking too much yeah there's no um well i have two questions, actually. One, you brought up Ash Peak being dormant again and again. Can we know how long it's been dormant for? That's an interesting detail. That's something you might want to ask about at one of these places where you just found out about the existence of it seconds ago.

You wouldn't know. Knowledge geology. Well, geography. That is a skull. Well, I imagine you added that for flavor not that it's written on the map like this is dormant no no no it says dormant it does yeah yeah i wouldn't i just gave you straight out of the book weird um the other question is we got there's an entrance into the volcano so that also lets you know that it's dormant

because they're training inside of it. That's crazy. That's really cool. So it's basically, like I said in the last episode, Blofeld's Lair. Yes. It's Blofeld's Lair. That is... It's very...

Very... Is that talking? You only live twice. The perhaps most racist of the Bond films, but yes. Still. And that's saying something.

Most of the 70s ones were. That's saying something. Pretty heavily ones were that's pretty heavily one of the 60s ones all right they didn't have sean connery made up to look like as if he wanted to be a person of japanese descent that that was what happened in you only live twice yeah but i will say when i was and they refer to it as becoming i'm making air quotes becoming japanese yes it's really cut and you who wrote that screenplay who rolled doll oh there you go oh charlie yeah apparently also well he's a known scumbag right don't scumbag yes yeah and i will say that when i was in living in japan as i did briefly the entire time i had the theme from You Only Live Twice running through my head and I didn't know why until

I got back and I watched the movie. Who sings the theme to that one? I believe it's Nancy Sinatra, right? You only live twice. Or so it seems. I love Bond things. Once for your life and once for your dreams.

I like Nancy. I just had the like do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. I had that running through my head the entire time I was there. I their racism aside I do have a deep love of the

Bond movies. I also. Oh yeah. Mostly the not racist ones. But even like... Are there any? What was the voodoo one? Oh, that's my favorite. I Love That Movie. That's my favorite Bond movie. Really? I find that one so boring.

Oh, really? No, I love that movie too. That's one of the first ones that I really got into. The Solitaire, Jane Seymour. Jane Seymour. It's beautiful. Yes. Oh my god. My favorite bomb movie is from rush with love yeah i love that's the one that's what i started on that is that are goldfinger is my my my pick for best ever bond movie despite who loved me is also a great bomb film oh and a great carly simon does I love me. That's a Marvin Hamlisch song. You know, she doesn't like being on camera.

Anyways, let's... Joe is so bored. Our episode count is going up by the fucking minutes. Let's get this show on the road. I picked high. That's why I'm buffering. You're working it. You're buffering right now. You're milking it.

Joe, have you ever seen a Bond movie? I saw Goldeneye. It was seen a Bond movie? I saw GoldenEye. It was the first Bond movie I ever saw. I knew it was going to be like 90s Bond. You know, I went back and specifically because they all came out on Prime. And I watched like the first three or four with, it was Connery, right? That's from Rush to Earth. I thought it was one of those.

Yeah, yeah. And that was the second one. And they were really good and i don't i have a problem sometimes with old movies like i thought it was gonna be like yeah i saw honor majesty secret service that's actually a great that is a great movie las and b's only uh yeah yeah all right they're clever and i have such like fond specific memories of like my best friend in middle school and i would like during the winter months when it was like snow days left and right,

it was watching Bond movies and playing Ocarina of Time. Oh, man, that sounds good. It was really good. My best friend and I would watch, at his dad's house, we'd watch a bunch of, like, Bond movies. Remember Careless Days, when you could just do whatever? It was so great. I mean, I was in middle school.

I was miserable. That was, like, the one bit of solace. Well, you were the tiniest kid in class. solace. You were the tiniest kid in class. Unfortunately, I was not the tiniest kid in class. Just beat you up and peed on you? Yeah. The front of every line. And now the Bond conversation is worth it.

That was Bond's backstory, I think. That's how he became 007. No. I waited for Grant to play. He got a spin tank on his computer. Oh, my God. It's 00, but his backstory is all number one. Oh, my God.

Guys, let's talk about the treasure. Let's get back to the show that we're doing. Can we, Grant, please? You've got us too far off track. Let's talk about the treasure inside of this. Oh, my God. You want to talk about the treasure inside of this good oh my god you want to talk about the axe let's hear listen let's say the real spellcraft checks all day i'm gonna eventually tell you what this stuff is it's a large frost blood axe oh frost not just sound

fun frost blood it has to be worse than the axe she was holding, right? Because why would you store the better one? She didn't bring out her B-axe. It is a, ooh, it's pretty cool. It's a plus one frost wounding battle axe. Ooh, that's really cool. It kills the souls of those it kills to the foul gods of the frost giants. So when you kill someone, you're sacrificing that to the frost giants. That's a little dicey.

Whenever it kills a creature with at least one hit die, every creature you'll face for the rest of the game, as an immediate action, the wielder can either activate divine favor on himself or bless on himself and his allies. That's kind of fun. That's interesting. And it's a plus one frost wounding battle axe. Wounding, I don't know what the wounding special thing does, but.

That was flavorful, at least. I used to, I remembered this. What is it? Ugh, I forget now, but it's cool. It deals one point of bleed damage when it hits a creature. Multiple hits for a wounding weapon increase the bleed damage. Oh, yeah. So, bleed damage stacks.

Crits do not multiply. So, that's a pretty cool weapon. Why don't you give it to Dalgrith, who does nothing? pretty cool weapon. Why don't you give it to Dalgrith who does nothing? We don't at the moment really have anyone who can wield it effectively anyway. What kind of axe is it?

Battleaxe? Frostblade axe? No, I mean its size. Its base weapon property. Oh. No, I'm not talking about that either. Is it a two-handed weapon or a one-handed weapon for a large creature? Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do a two-handed weapon or a one-handed weapon for a large creature? It's a battle axe. Yeah.

One-handed. One-handed, yeah. But it would be two-handed for a medium creature to use. It would. Even if you size it down? No, no. Not if you size it down. But we'll never get to the cathedral again.

Yeah, yeah. That's something we should probably talk about. We can get to the cathedral. Yep. Let's talk about the drinking horn of bottomless valor. Oh, my God! Doesn't that sound awesome for that crew? Yes, it really does, actually.

I could just see Dalgrath, Baron, and Jiver just like passing this horn around. Let me tell you what this fucking thing does. This horn is bound with fittings of gold and decorated with ornate carvings depicting scenes of glorious battle. A fully charged horn has three charges, and they're renewed each day. So long as it has at least one charge remaining, you can command to fill it with mead. You can command it to fill itself with mead of any type of booze. You'd be like, gin! Gin fill it with mead.

We know that's what Grant would say. Straight gin. Old gin burger over here. Wait, you just said you can fill it with mead of any type of booze. Mead is mead. Or, or, or, or any type of booze. One charge. A creature can spend one or more charges while drinking to gain the following benefits.

One charge. Just puff give. Puff, puff, pass. The drinker gains 1d8 temporary hit points as from an aid spell, which lasts for one minute. Using one charge is similar to drinking a potion. Standard action and provokes. Two charges. You get 1d8 plus five temporary, and you're enlarged.

Oh! Like enlarged. Oh! Like enlarged person for five minutes. To use two charges, the drinker must spend a full round drinking from the horn, which always provokes three charges. You ready for this? Yeah. Yeah. 1d8 plus 10 temporary.

Really bogarting. Enlarge for 10 minutes and gains the benefit of a heroism spell. Oh, wow! Holy shit. As it's enlarged. You just have to spend two full round actions drinking from the horn. That's awesome. That's amazing.

So now we're going to look at heroism. Heroism's great. Plus two morale bonus to attack, saves, and skills. Yeah. Yep. Pretty, pretty, pretty sweet. The game I just ran for our $100 Patreon subscribers. Someone cast heroism and it ruined my day as a GM.

Oh, good to know. Yeah, that's enough. When people are just missing, they will no longer miss. It was a good time. You also get an insistent door knocker. You mentioned the door knocker. And I resisted saying. I was like, I'm curious for this.

What knockers? This is very interesting. What? Thank you. Very interesting. What? Thank you. Thank you, doctor. Great knockers. This iron gargoyle face holds an iron ring in its mouth. Once per day, when the flat back of the gargoyle face is placed against a wall, floor, or ceiling,

it fuses into place, creating a usable door. Yes! And penetrating the space beyond up to one foot as if as if using pass wall wow oh my god speaking uh insistent door knocker speaking the command word again ass ends the pass wall effect and then the thing pops back up and you can that's amazing that's great just be like if this is if this is only one foot thick i can just create a wall out of nothing that's a door yeah and one foot thick is thick could just create a wall out of nothing. That's a door. Yeah, and one foot thick is thick. Most things are going to be thinner than that, so we should be good.

Yes, yes. Maybe not volcano walls, but still pretty cool. Oh, okay, great. So just immediately nerf it. Thanks, Troy. So just sell it? A marble mastodon figure. Okay.

Wondrous power. What is this? I'm so excited about this. Yeah, these figurines are usually so amazing. Badass. All right, so it functions like a marble elephant. However, this was going to work a little bit different. So let me tell you about the marble elephant figurine of wondrous power.

This is the largest of the figurines of wondrous power, being about the size of a human hand. Upon utterance of the figurines of Wonderspower being about the size of a human hand. Upon utterance of the command word, a marble elephant grows to the size and specifications of a true elephant. The animal created from the statuette is fully obedient to

the figurine's owner, serving as a beast of burden, a mount, or a combatant. Amazing. This particular one... I was just complaining that we're not going to have any summon creatures. Instead of creating an elephant, it creates a woolly mammoth. That is what I am talking about. Wait, is it a one-time use?

Or does it shrink down? No, Statuary can be used four times per month. Oh, that's cool. Four to 24 hours at a time. Wow. So you're telling me we could actually ride down. So we're 100% riding a woolly mammoth. Hell yeah.

No one will see. To Glimmer Town. To Glimmer Town. Oh, they should know we're coming. We're going to Glimmer Town. Yeah, we're going to come in like Aladdin, like when he's all fucking squared away. The staff, blowing horns. It's a staff of frost.

Tipped on either end with a glistening diamond. Pembroke would have loved this. This rune-covered staff allows use of the following spells. One charge, ice storm. Two charges, wall of ice. Three charges, cone of cold. Oh, my. I think I can use that.

Speaking of cone of cold, anybody have an open headband slot? Yep. Well, then you might be interested in the Winter Wolf Headband. Oh, I remember this, too, from last week. Crafted of pale bone or silver, this headband features a snarling wolf's head centered on the wearer's forehead. The wearer gains cold resistance 10. Boom. Once per day, the wearer may transform into a large white-furred wolf

for 11 minutes. In addition, once per day, the wearer may breathe a 30-foot cone of cold that deals 76 points of cold damage. Seven dies six.

Reflex DC 16 for half. The wearer may use this breath weapon even when transformed into the winter wolf. Wow. We could cause a lot of trouble in that wolf cave. Head out of here. That's true. Start some fights. This is my cave, bitch.

There is also an ivory cameo of a chelish woman worth 250 gold pieces. Seven amethysts worth 50 gold pieces each, 130 platinum pieces, 4,260 gold pieces, and 7,834 silver pieces. Wow. What a haul. That is amazing.

That is a pretty good haul. And a map. Never been happier for Stone County. I just wrote, and lots of other stuff so there is i'm gonna email it to you man there is a chance you're telling me there's a chance that we could have gone through this room and never seen this little treasure trove

you're telling me you would have let us walk out of here without that map uh that stuff if you had really failed horribly on the checks i would have given you the map and not giving you the stuff wow it's the map you kind of need yeah uh yeah i'd be like oh and but you also find a map you tripped over it on your way out there's a mural on the wall it's a map it's tucked in the skirkotla's armor it says ash peak well cool so that's that's the situation. Other situation you have is that with Scarecrow dead, you now have her gear, specifically her armor, which Brander has demanded of you. The last thing he said to you in that dream,

if you're to trust the dreams, do what you think is right man what do we do we have to talk about it before we leave this place do we give brander this armor i know we can certainly use it for bait for you to learn morera. I don't know if we can even. Touch this man. He's so powerful. This might be a means to an end. To get more information on him.

Or it may be an opportunity to. Barter. But I don't like making deals with people that evil. What is to be gained from him? I don't know. And what if we don't give him the armor? What if we take it and go about our lives?

I don't know. It seems strange to me. I don't mind giving him the armor. It's not... It has no value to me. It doesn't seem like something so powerful to let him do more than he can already do. But yet, he needs us to take it. He can't just come in here and take it from Skirkotla himself.

It's Baron Ashpeak here that killed Skirkotla. He's the one powerful enough to do it. Does that mean you're more powerful than Brander, Baron? I don't know. I don't think it. Does that mean you're more powerful than Brander, Baron? I don't know. I don't think so. I agree with you. But he's a... He's a vexing figure, I'll tell you that.

I don't understand his motives. I can't wrap my head around what he's doing here. He swears he's not our enemy. But yet... It feels like he's playing us. He is my enemy. Yeah, he's playing us. He is my enemy. Yeah, he's mine too. Put my ward

and my charge in a state, vegetative state. It's my duty to bring him out of it. I, uh, I think he may be, uh, he might have compromised me a bit.

I've been seeing him in dreams. What? Walked into rooms. Seen a child I once promised a better world for there heard him talk to me offered me items he seems to be

threatening me but also strangely giving me a choice I don't know what any of it means. The only thing I... want to do is to stop him. But stop him from what? I don't know.

That's what we don't know. Stop him from... whatever his plan is. But we don't know his plan from whatever his plan is but we don't know his plan that puts us at a disadvantage what do all of you think i don't know if we can i don't know if we can beat him i've never faced this person i don't know but i think that um we have the option of bait him in so he can confront him i mean i i'd certainly you know be in favor of trying my hand against him or uh you know we can give up the armor. You know. See if. See if that mollifies him somehow. And we can.

Benefit from that. I don't know. What negotiation is there. With a man who wears my daughter's face. Well. Well. There is that. And I understand. There's a personal aspect to a lot of this

so i've seen you face down the armies of darkness what does one man scare you jimmer oh no no it ain't that i'm scared i'm just trying to be practical and i respect the pain and uh hardship that you've had to go through and your stakes in all this, and I'm perfectly willing to fight this person, but I'm just trying to act tactically here and see what our best options are. I think that the only option, now that I try to fully take in the breadth and depth of his plans

and the absolute evil emanating from that armor is to destroy the armor unless we think we can leverage it and somehow change his mind I don't like it I don't like it. I don't like it, Baron.

I think Metro, no disrespect, but I think that I don't think we can beat him. I've been in the room with him. There's a feeling about him that shakes me to my core. I'm not the most, I'm not the bravest man That's for sure But I feel like he's got something happening there That I don't quite understand And if maybe

Maybe If you want to see him If you want a chance To Face him Well The armor might just give you that chance, but I don't know that we could beat them. I don't know that going in fattened is the way to go.

Maybe you just give it to him. Ask him what he's doing here. Try to get the information out of him. Find a weakness we can explore at later. I don't know. Metra, I just met you. I don't know. Metra, I just met you. I don't know what you're capable of, but it's like

Jim has said. If you want me to go against him, I mean, I will. But I just don't think he'd let it happen. Seems to me he's got all the control here. I can't see giving him what he wants I just can't see it if the option is

give him the armor or destroy the armor I would destroy the armor but do we even have the means to destroy it well this brings up an excellent question. We kind of haphazardly, before we went north last episode, Baron did a quick spellcraft on it. Are there any other applicable checks we could learn about destroying it or any other info about this armor?

You mean religion or history? I'll try religion. 19. Oh, 21. Oh. Oh. religion uh 19 oh 21 oh religion so religion okay so you know you know the morgues are kind of a perfect example um it makes sense why they were so close to her uh throne room the way morgues are created, I don't know if we talked about it on the show or not, because you didn't fight them. It's like the worst, most horrible serial killers and whatnot. When they die, their evil brings them back to life

and transforms them into these horrible, horrible creatures. So this was like giants that were just pure embodiments of evil uh that came back chaotic yeah chaotic evil that came back as these morgues but the grave knight is very very similar they're almost they're sort of analogous to liches in a way and their spirit lingers on in their armor. Hmm. In order to destroy a Grave Knight's armor, you either have to disintegrate it, throw it into a volcano,

or bring it to the positive energy plane. Disintegrate it sounds like an option uh active volcano we only know of dormant volcanoes right now sadly and bringing it to the positive energy plane you may have knowledge arcana yeah or knowledge planes knowledge planes i have both of those all right which one planes make more sense i wrote terribly 15 15 on planes planes yeah you would know that no none of you could survive actually going to the positive energy plane very cool it's just like never survived such blinding positive light it would disintegrate actually there's a story this the uh um uh lovecraft country uh the books that are being turned into a show

I think that Jordan Peele was working on one of the stories they talk about the theory behind positive energy being kind of horrifying because they say

like in the author, I can't remember but they talk about like this being exposed to positive energy it kind of like strips away anything that makes you you and just leaves the essence just the life force yeah and it's like it strips away like anything kind of distinctive about your personality your person and it just like you're just like stripped of all this so it's like even though it's positive energy it it just like you're just like stripped of all this so it's like even though it's positive energy it's just like it's it's awful yeah so so that just you saying that like made me think of yeah of that yeah so dalgryth knows this he

knows this about the armor and as you're saying this aloud he has this thought yeah says it aloud yeah and it's just thinking well maybe it's her spirit he's looking for. Maybe he's trying to connect to it, commune with it, learn something from it. He's given us these clues with what he's done with your daughter. He's trying to extend his life. Baron said that, well, you intimated that he was undead, but he's not. He's very much alive, but he's taking on these attributes of undeath. Maybe this woman, this giant's ability to raise and live for 350 years is something he wants to research deeply.

And it's within her armor that he can do it. It brings him closer to immortality. So maybe you're right. Maybe it is a disintegrating... It's not a simple warding piece of armor when it comes to him. It could be something far greater and far more devastating

if we let it get in his hands. Well, it's simple to me. He's seeking out some of the most powerful and good people I've ever seen and trying to take something away from him. He did it to Galabras. He did it to Della. And now, even though I don't care about this dead witch, Skirkotla. She is, no doubt, one of the most powerful souls, spirits, and energies I've ever come across,

and nothing good can come from Brander having access to that. So I think, if you're willing, please help us destroy this armor, Metra. I must see him. Disintegrated in front of his face. Let him look at it and then burn it right in front of him.

See what he does. Get his reaction. That'll teach us more than anything else. God's helped me but I haven't seen my daughter in a very long time. And even if he's stolen her face... It would be one glimpse... That I'd never got to have.

Dog Wraith looks at Baron like, Like, dude, might not be a good idea one other option can i somehow use magical device on the scroll to shoot that armor to the plane of positive energy you the plane shift would allow you to go to the uh plane of positive energy you'd have to take it with you but you would disintegrate oh Oh. It's worth it, dude. You can't let Brander have it. I would also cast one spell. You only have five a day.

Yeah. He could do it, and it would be a consumable item. It begs the question why Brander gave that to him. Yeah, no, that's fucking me up real hard. Real hard? And it's even trickier because she could just disintegrate it right now, but she doesn't want to because she knows that might keep him away. Very tricky.

Oh, this is hard. This is so hard. This is, uh... How is he to find us? What did he tell you? He told us that when we exited the crypt, he'd be there. And that he would want to collect upon what is owed him immediately upon our exit. We also don't have to exit the way he expects.

But don't forget what he told you in your dream, Baron. What's he holding over you? What's he going to do if you don't give him the armor? How is he going to punish you? I have, in my entire journey, fighting against this man and the giants that conspire to take over this world, never bowed down to threats against my person or those around me and if he were to do something like that he could do it at

any time at any moment i will not be blackmailed if he takes anything else away from me just be digging another hole in my heart and it's vast my friend there's room for more but it seemed to me that this child meant something to you something a little more personal and you're willing to let that go I'm not gonna be willing to go another moment without saying her name sharing it with you her name's Aubrey her parents were dead killed by giants

outside of Shinerman's fortune I told her grandmother that I would fight for her that that I would move forward, use her spirit as something to inspire me. Something and someone that could live her life and enjoy the world. me and my partners, my friends, all of whom are dead now, we're going to provide her.

But there's only so much a man can do, and all I can do is fight what's in front of me, and if there's a son of a bitch that can enter my dreams and teleport all over the world and threaten to kill a baby there's nothing i can do about that but what i can do is i can destroy this armor before he ever gets his fucking hands on it can't let him have it sounds like decision's been made as long as you're willing to do it metaitre perhaps we draw him out into the open you get a look for yourself yes

and then do it and then I'll disintegrate it I just don't like personally Grant does not like the idea of like he's so extra magical he could just pop in before or I also don't like and I don't Matthew's here so that's weird but like I don't like, and I don't, Matthew's here,

so that's weird, but like, I don't like the head space where Mettra's at seeing her daughter and not being able to pull the disintegrate trigger. I don't like that either.

Does he have some sort of, there's some sort of reason he can't enter the tomb? Not one we've found. Not one that's obvious. I have an idea. It's a mystery. What?

We can take the armor into the pocket dimension of your breastplate. Yeah, I was thinking about something like that. And then when he... After we negotiate with Brander. Or either in the breastplate or in the ethereal plane. Well, the problem is if I say that... And I'm either in the breastplate or in the ethereal plane well the problem is if i say the and i'm not in the armor like i could bring it with me i guess but yeah all right i mean the and if you use the cloak you go you and everything you're holding goes into the ethereal plane yeah i just he's so fucking magical that i don't i don't know anything. Bring it with us.

I'll do it. Trust me, I have no compunction about doing it in front of him. All right. And I'll take the cloak and go into the ethereal plane just in case. See ya. See ya. I'll be back, Jonathan. Good luck with Brandon. I'll be back good luck with brendan yeah i'll be back bye see ya

so what's our plan teleport to the entrance of the cave since we can't walk out we can't even walk out now we'll teleport yeah to the little house we were in yeah we can do that oh my god it's so awful i just wanted to it now, but I also want to give Metra... Baron feels like he owes Metra the opportunity to see this bastard. The only reason he's not demanding it be done right now, right in this room. We also don't know that he wouldn't show his face if we destroyed it. He might be like pissed and show up. Yeah.

But... I don't know. So, you want to teleport out or do you want to destroy it here teleport out teleport out roll a d100 well it's it's different now it's weird with metra yeah metra's screwing everything up yeah i mean and she kind of has this like ability to call the shots that's the mom. Yeah, exactly. A bereft mother. You're like, yes, Mrs. Nine.

Ten. Ten, you're all right. Those are very low numbers. Yeah, you're running very low. Swoom, swoom. And you're back in that, was it a tannery, I think? Yeah. Smells good.

Stinking tanner. Stinks of worse. Now we wait. What's the plan plan outside of brander what'd you see on that map baron what's your plan I

uh I've heard of cragadan before I've always uh cragadan yes of course you know I forgot I forgot I was standing next to talgrim I've always... Cragadan, yes. Of course you know. Of course I know Cragadan. I forgot I was standing next to Talgren. This tall son of a bitch over here and this blue-skinned lady really threw me off. Don't have blue skin.

Oh, sorry. I was thinking about your dead daughter. It's just so pale. I don't have blue skin either. It's just so pale. You're embarrassing yourself. Oh, right. It was the hair.

I'm sorry. Well, we're keeping that in. He's drinking a habanero beer. Yeah, no. It's not about alcoholism. It's about not caring about you as a person or as a player. No. Wow!

That's a joke. Real right turn. Yeah. All right, so Grant. Grant reminds me of Brander. Send me your receipts, Grant. Grand Yeah. All right. So Grand Senator. Grand reminds me of Brander. Send me your receipts, Grant. Grander. Grander.

Oh, no. No, it's him. Kill him. Disintegrate. I disintegrate you. So, yeah, I think that might be the best place to feel inspired and also get our hands on the best wares that we could possibly have before going to ashpeak yeah and you know you can resize weapons there as well i'm sure it's a huge

settlement and they're dwarves they're going to be able to have that access you're just not going to have the magical powers of the forge to do it uh quickly i mean is it worth establishing a base of a base at the forge, at the cathedral? Since we lost that, but that was always a convenient place to go back and I'm talking as Matthew now. There are ways we can get there. I mean, I can fly. We have the

Broom of Overland flight. The Broom of Overland flight will fly 40 hours a day. I did the math. It flies 9 hours a day. 40 hours a day. I did the math. It flies nine hours a day. 40 hours a day. I'm sorry, 40 miles. It's an amazing broom. Look at the map there.

I mean, it's pretty far. It's far. It's really far. If the distance between Ash Peak and Skiergard is 100 miles, you're talking about roughly 200 to 300 miles. However, it's not that far from true now yeah you could definitely go back to true now and then fly we could all pop back to true now and then fly in i like having minder halls valley as kind of a bash of hope for like the world beyond again talking as grant i like the idea of seeing this little temple get built up but also that's tone skin oh yeah stone skin is pretty good but i think you just fly there i mean there's no reason

we can't take a couple days yeah while you journey there go to true now leave you guys at true now i think we even need to go to true i don't think we need to go to true now you want to wait here did you say you think we need to go no i don't don't. But I think it would behoove us to go to the cathedral, establish a presence there, know how to teleport back there when we wanted to. Because it really is like a valuable kind of base to operate out of with the resizing, with all the buffs that we can get from the forge. Yeah, I just don't feel the rush. You know what I mean? I think you take the time for you to get, Metro, to get to the cathedral.

You should also get to Skelton. You don't have to. But I mean, we could. While you make the journey there, we could travel to Skelton and meet you back in Skelton just so that we can get off this mountaintop, you know, get some cooler or warmer temperatures and rest and food and proper lodging and whatever. Even if it takes a couple of days, you can fly to the cathedral and then fly to skel and then we can all teleport back to the cathedral yeah or i could go with you to skel all we all travel to skel to overland yeah fly the i

fly the cathedral with baron and then come grab you yeah let's go sure that works like a great plan i love it i love you as a person and a player there you go well that was a change of heart it happened fast but speaking of change of heart i don't i don't want to speak for everyone else but i understand baron why you want to go to crack it down and i'd love to see it myself but on to ash peak to this giant training camp. I want to make sure we're all doing it for the right reasons. I mean, why, Metro, do you want to continue on this way?

New Jimmer, all the way south to some giant camp. What's your end in all this? What's yours? Fortune and glory? Please. I always give up the wrong vibe, Baron.

That's not what I'm trying to... He looks over at Baron, like, kind of seriously. He's just like, I don't... I'm not very good with Clever speeches Saying what I feel In a concise way

But I'll just say That this This man here I'm not 100% sure But I'm pretty sure that he saved my life. And I think that means he's my friend. And I don't...

What's that on my hands, Baron? It's a policy. It's a Deathbringer policy. You saved my life You're my friend And wherever you go Elise For now I'm with you

And I'll tell you one thing Metrin Jimmer This man is my friend And his fame not only precedes him As you've heard about his daring dues all across this land but it also hides the man he's not a coward he's not after money and glory he could have left at any time he could have turned to run he could have gone off with his wealth and retired and been around wine and women all day long but he stuck it out he's just trying to make sure in his own way that you're here for the same reasons he is. I got to say, I don't care about any of this.

This is not my fight. I don't have any truck with any of that. World spin and conspiracies or conquests. It's not my fight. But I'm here because I believe that this is where the boy needs me to be. I believe that. And so I'm here now because I think this is where Galabras needs and wishes me to be. So if that's where the fight takes me down into the ash peak, gates of hell, whatever.

I'll follow it. I'll be there. I'll be there for him. Sheriff. Sheriff It sounds like you were One of the best friends my daughter ever had I want to face Brander now If we survive

I'm at your service A deputy If you will. Aww. Aww. Sha-la-la-la. Baron nods.

No, Baron nods. Take this. Put it on your cloak. And then he feels underneath his winter clothes like he slides his hand underneath and touches the badge he got been true now and he just nods at her and smiles do you know for uh i don't know off the top of my head how long dog wraith has been in the show in real time like 15 episodes? Since Four Bears Death? Yeah, Four Bears Death.

I can't quite remember, but I've never talked about who plays him. Yes, you have. You've never cast him? You told us in the first episode. I did? Yeah. I don't think you did. You must have told me at some point.

I don't think I ever said who plays him. Well, who is it? Wait, I'm going to mouth it to you. Okay. And you tell me all the time. Yeah. So I must know For some reason I don't even know

I think you just saw My character sheet Who? I swear you told us Who is it? We don't know It's played by Colin Farrell Oh

You definitely told us What? No we never heard that I didn't know that I think you told Matthew Pillow talk Yeah What he slept over

Yeah What he slept over that night That sleepover we had Yeah He's Colin Farrell No Colin Yeah Colin Farrell Can't be blinded by Play video games All night long It's not gonna be bad over yeah we took over that sleepover we had he's he's colin farrell no yeah play video video games all night long there was this movie he did uh the deer something it was uh anyway he he looks older now you know what i mean like i

remember him as this like young hot shot yeah sort of guy which is like part of the the dog the lobster uh the lobster is one of my favorite movies i've seen in the past like five years oh yeah that's perfect this version of him but you know like oh yeah you know that's great in his time he's like a uh you know he's a fucking hot shot yeah like a ladies man or whatever but now he's older and he's uh got a black and gray and a salt and pepper um yeah anyway tlc black and gray and salt and pepper um yeah tlc um all right so you're in this cabin you've all talked to your seems like you're all of a similar purpose now and you're just waiting for brander yeah time passes no one knocks at the door i assume you're looking out from time to time towards the front of the tomb maybe you send a dog wraith out invisible or something just to make sure

knowing full well he probably has see invisibility if he can turn into a fucking dragon he has all that stuff i don't know what type honestly i think dog wraith might go out not invisible just be like just stand out there because he's so convinced that this guy doesn't get his kicks by just showing up and killing people. Like,

he's got some weird game going on. Yeah. Day turns into night and he never comes. I don't know what he's playing at. This might have been

part of the manipulation itself just telling us about the armor. Well, you do what you want with it. Disintegrate now or later. Doesn't matter. Either way, I think we need to start making our way to Skelton.

If he meets us on the way, so be it. Keep it for now, then. Okay. Delay. While we move on. Baron doesn't like the idea of delaying but sometimes it's the best strategy well no just on the item existing still because it's so evil but because of everything he's gone through he's just you know muddling over in his head he's fucked up lost all these companions and stuff. He's going to let it slide.

And we'll move on. All right. So you hold on to the armor. What, do you throw it in the bag? Yeah, I think I got a handy haversack. Jimmer seems the least corruptible out of all of us. So I kind of want him to have it. I don't care.

I'm not going to. Jimmer holds it in his hand. You have a handy haversack too, right? I have a bag of holding. Bag of holding. So that's probably where you put. Yeah, that's where I put it the first time. Hambrick's Jimmer.

Yeah. All right. So Jimmer holds the. What did we do with the bodies? We didn't talk about that. I mean, that's a summer. Put them back. It's another thing I felt like we talk about is like,

we'll get them back to Skelter or something like that. Yeah. So imagine this rather than playing this all out like um dalgrith and jimmer would probably make the trip to skelter we're all gonna go no we're all you're all gonna go to skelter we're all gonna hike together hike to skelter what was it like three days or four days it's gonna take three days to get to Skel. From Skel, then what? You're going to fly to the Mindspins. Fly to the Cathedral of Minderhall. While Jimmer and...

Because Baron has to go with you to direct you. Yeah, while Jimmer and Dalgrith stay in Skel. Skel and deal with... And report everything that happened. And let them know they're safe, at least, from that encroaching giant camp, frost giant camp. All right, so then you go on to fly to the Cathedral of Minderhall, which I'll say takes another three days, you know? So you, like, fly, land, camp.

Me, fair. So many amazing role-play opportunities. Well, you know, I'm just looking at Skelt. I think you could probably do that in two days. Be back to Skelt in a total of three days. If you look at the map there, like, you're flying. Yeah, as the crow flies. I mean, you can cover a lot of ground.

Yeah. All right, so let's say by the time you're all back in Skelton, ready to go, five days. Meet Farron, shake hands. Nice to meet you. Five and a half, six days. Almost a week, yeah. Oh, Ralphio.

Six days. Love him. Yeah, you do the whole meet and greet, now you know. I spent a couple hours there. Yeah, really take it all in, the whole surrounding area. Could teleport back there very easily. So at least it's seen casually. And then...

Take in 20. And then you can teleport back to Skelton. Right. All right. That was the idea. The only place we know in Skelton, which is that one hotel room. That's right. No, no, no.

We got a new place now. We hiked there. So now you can pick anywhere. It's a different hotel room. Oh, we can take a ticket to another hotel. I'm sure they're sick of us popping up. Can we go straight to the bottle service area where Dalgirth and Baron got to know each other? And be like, listen, I'm going to trade in a few of these Amethysts to get you some bottle service,

big guy. Come on, Jimmer. And then from Skelt, are you going to Krakadan? I think so, yeah. You could teleport to Skirgard if you want to save some time because you do know what Skirgard looks like. I'm not going to have you roll D100s

for these because, you know, we're just moving things along here. So you teleport to Skier Guard. We'll say it's now day seven. I passed all my teleports. Okay, good. Can we reserve the right to retroactively do some, like, deal with the remains?

Yes. I don't want to rush that because I have some ideas, but I don't want to bog it down right now. Yeah, yeah. I kind of want to keep things shopping. And shopping, et cetera. And shopping and the remains.

But you're dealing with the remains in Skelt. Well, I don't know. So let me just retroactively deal with it. Yeah, yeah. You could think about this. Maybe you want to go back to the cathedral and do something proper. I'm trying to think of the individual characters. We might not even want to bury them on this continent.

You know what I mean? So there's things to think about. Yeah. But now you make your way to Krakatoa. You know from Skirgard it's 12 days on foot. Can you cast communal fly, Metro? That's only, what, like 12 minutes? So you're pretty much huffing it.

We're huffing it. Even if you want to jump on the elephant. I mean, I definitely think we should jump on the elephant, but I don't know. The elephant is... I don't even know if we all ride on the elephant. I mean, I definitely think we should jump on the elephant, but I don't know. The elephant is... I don't even know if we all ride on an elephant. I don't know. I mean, one of us can ride on the broom. We can also just travel for 10, 12 days.

That's normal. Somewhere around day 10, you're camping near the confluence of the Deep Cut and the Marideth River. You see those two rivers that sort of connect there, just east of Glimmerhold and north of Kragadan. So you've probably got another four or five days, three or four days to get to Kragadan from there. And what's the weather like? Is it just like temperate? Like, is it fall? Is it spring?

It's late fall now. Late fall now. Late fall. Late fall. It'll be winter soon. Camping one night and you've got your watches and whatnot. You wake up in the morning. Something seems a little off.

Let me roll a perception check. Oh, dear. God damn it. Let's have a bee sting. 35. 22. 30. Jimmer, you see that your handy haversack is untied.

And wide open. Oh, hell. Oh, hell. Grant's very upset. I want it. You should have killed me when you had the chance! But that's not all. Roll a survival check.

Uh, 21. 21. 21. You see, not too far away from the camp, a series of footprints that start out small and then become very, very large. Like something had been crawling and changing along the way.

And then left as a giant. We'll see you next week. Oh, shit! Oh, my God! Oh, shit. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Grant, you made such huge mistakes.

Grant's so mad. Look at his mad face. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Glass Cannon Network production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission. finishing