The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 23 - Cavern on the Green

Episode Date: November 3, 2015

After a long delayed rest, our heroes track their unknown quarry into the mouth of an ancient cave. What terrors will they encounter beneath Bloodmarch Hill? For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. We've basically been in a battle for the past, what, dozen episodes? At least, yeah. A much-needed break in the battle gives Gormley time for a creepy ritual. You burn the scroll and use its ashes to create a special brew or powder. Oh, that's so awesome. That's consumed by the familiar. But the fight is far from over.

The heroes must follow their quarry into a haunting cavern. So as you enter the cave, you see these sort of gossamer cobwebs hanging from the ceiling. The cavern, lit only by Galavris' gauntlet. You know, and it's casting these giant shadows of you on the wall. It's very eerie. And encounter their most hated enemy again. And a hundred swarm of Shadow Rats come up the southern portion. Straight at you! The Shadow Rats are back! The adventure goes underground right now. Hello there, everybody.

This is me, Skid slash Calabrus, one of the four guys on the show. Thank you again so much for checking in with us, listening to the show. Man, I just got through listening to last week's episode again, and it was really good. If I say so myself, that was a darn fine episode. It's going to be a tough act to follow, but I think this episode is really good, too. So I don't want to take too much time. I did, I recorded, this is my second attempt at this. I recorded an intro talking about genres and role-playing games, and it basically devolved

into me just listing all my favorite role-playing games that I've ever played in my massively long life. So I won't subject you guys to that. But what I did want to talk about was something we've touched upon a couple of times in the show, which is the kind of post-traumatic stress that characters in our story, in our character situation,

would have to be going through. Because you think about all the horrendous stuff that has happened to them, near-death experiences, monsters straight out of folklore attacking them out of the darkness, monsters straight out of folklore attacking them out of the darkness, and the kind of psychological effect that that must have. And I was talking with my friend Cameron, who was a listener of the show when I was

down in Texas visiting he and his wife, and we were talking about really the only difference between fantasy, like we're're doing and horror is our protagonist's ability to fight back and the the the the impact that that has on their psyche the difference between that and someone who's being chased by jace we're not running away we're actively fighting against and in most cases hopefully unless troy gets his way vanquishing these evil horrible demonic things so anyway just wanted to call attention to that something to think about also uh want to remind everybody beg them please please to go on itunes and leave us a review five one star, whatever you think we're worth.

It's the best way for new people to find the show and it would be a huge help to us if you could do that. Assuming you haven't already. And if you have, thank you so much for doing that. That was so nice. We love you. Thank you so much. Oh, you guys are great.

So now let us jump right into this week's episode. Speaking of horror and post-traumatic stress, delving into an ancient, probably horrible cave. Episode 23. Cavern on the Green. Welcome everybody to KGCP

The Wave. This is DJ Splashdazzle. This next song goes out to a special half-orc who just lost his son Cats in the cradle in the sea Singletier rolls down Lark's cheek Come on

That's a tough one Oh, man Too soon Would you know my name is just son If I saw you in heaven? My name's really stupid, too. It's Lork. York.

Oh, man. Oh, boy. Having a good time. So cruel. Pretty crazy battle. Last time. Our longest episode, too. Yeah.

By far. The fans asked for it, and they got it. That was a long fight. We've basically been in a battle for the past, what, dozen episodes? At least. Yeah. At least. And you lived to tell the tale.

No thanks to you. So no thanks to me. In spite of me. He foiled Troy's efforts to kill us all. We need to find Oath Don and kick his ass. I know. But still, at the end. Yeah, once this all calms down, we got to find that kid and beat the shit out of him.

Beat the shit out of that fucking kid. Visit the exposition household. That's right, yeah. Galabros did shove him a little. I knocked him over, but that wasn't enough. I want to do more to him. All right, so you obviously just had this grueling battle, and Curse rides up and tells you,

you saw these people go into the newly formed cave that the giant smashed into the side of Bloodmarch Hill. But he says he's going to point guards outside the cave, and you guys have a chance to rest. So you walk back through town, and you walk through the inner quarter, and it's just bodies everywhere. Bodies of orcs, bodies of creatures.

Can I ask, what time of day is it? Like, did we fight through the night, or did we fight through a whole day? Well, it started in the morning. No, it started in the evening. It started at the evening funeral. Sunset. Oh, I thought that was... Right, but imagine, like in real time Is it like dawn now? Probably only like

four or five hours past. So it's like coming up on... Sun should be rising soon. It's almost bedtime, one would say. Which is perfect. Midnight. Yes. Oh, okay. Perhaps it's the witching hour. So yeah, you just go by bodies of orcs, bodies of townspeople, friends.

Militia men. That toddler that's riddled with arrows. Jason. Headless dudes. Headless dudes. militiamen that toddler that's riddled with arrows uh Jason headless headless dudes headless dudes that one orc was carrying a bag of heads right

oh yeah it's disturbing it's just gruesome and you know so that that momentary elation that you felt over uh

killing the giant and uh you know at least halting the threat on True Now for a moment is immediately uh kind of taken away as you realize the gravity of the situation.

Tempered. Tempered, if you will. And where do you guys want to rest for the night? Do you want to stick together or camp out under the stars? Maybe go back to the Ramble House? the Ramble House. It's one of these situations where it's like Curse said he's going to point guards outside, but you pretty much

need to rest, gear up, and get this figured out because you don't know how long, maybe there's another exit in that tunnel or whatever. You need to get people in there and figure out what's going on. I heard there's an empty bed at Lork's house now. I was thinking I could sleep in that bed.

Is that okay? I don't take up much room It's a bed in the shape of a race car Your son loved racing Your little glow in the dark stars On the ceiling And a poster of like Galerians Oh god

It's like a girl in a bikini leaning against a Ferrari. Oh god. This is so horrible. The last episode of this podcast you're going to search Jason's room and find that he was playing Pathfinder and he was running the Giant Slayer campaign, and it's all happened in his dream.

It's like St. Elsewhere. It's like the last episode of St. Elsewhere. The Tommy Westfall universe. Exactly. Oh, boy. That was good. Man, before Grant ruined it. No, I was going to say that I got to go home first.

I don't necessarily need to sleep there. And in fact, I'd be fine with going to the Ramble house because I don't want to be alone. Right. But I do think he's got to do something with the body. We left Jasun's body in the house. So I need to figure out if triage is doing it, wrapping up corpses, getting to set aside. Because we're going to have to have funerals for these people. You know what I mean?

They're not just going to be like, pile up the bodies and burn them. Like it's a, it's a civilized town. So, yeah. So I guess you're either going to want to like store him in your house or, or discuss with the sanctuary. What do people do with corpses before freezers? Well, I have gentle repose, which will preserve the body until such time as you're ready to have a funeral. Oh, okay.

So you can also bring it to the sanctuary. Oh, so magic. That's what they did before freezing. Yes, yes. To answer your question, they used divine magic. You can bring them back to the sanctuary, and you would assume that's where

the majority of these bodies, the ones that still are intact, are being taken under the care of... That's what I would assume. Yeah, so you kind of these bodies, the ones that still are intact, are being taken under the care of. That's what I would assume. Yeah, so you kind of walk through, and you do come upon the body of Jasun kind of stamped in the mud. No, I brought him in the house. I made that clear.

He cradled him, remember? Oh, that's right, at the end of that thing. And I kind of left him on our- And we may or may not have looted the body. Right. Yeah, and when we left, they looted the body. Remember, he found a list of his goals number one live forever yep i do remember that uh okay so you you go back uh so calabras you're

you're gonna cast gentle repose yes thank you calabras it's like this will he will stay as he is until we are till we are ready to bury him or whatever you choose all All right. So, yeah, then I'd like to take his body to wherever they're, you know, putting these fallen soldiers and stuff and wherever the militia men wounded are going or, you know, casualties are going and leave him there wrapped up. And it is the sanctuary. I mean, some are being taken to the temple of Abadar that was being run by that guy that was trying to string up Brittany. Yeah, the lynching. But you obviously

don't feel comfortable with that. Right. Even though you smooth things over with him, you're going to go to the sanctuary. So you do that, and it's like the sanctuary just reeks of death. Just all these bodies being carried in to be consecrated. But it's not like, alright right, mass funeral ceremony tomorrow.

You're not quite sure what's going on, but Tayari assures you that they will take the best of care in preserving Jasun's body for a time when you see fit to lay him to rest. Okay, and then after that, Lork would be fine with staying at the ramble house. Is there something to be said for camping out near the cave? I mean, I guess there are guards. We don't really need to worry about it. I think we just need to get a really good night's sleep.

Like, that's, you know. Yeah, I think I agree. I think that's key. Oh, also, we're walking through these bodies and some of these people that's key and um oh also we're walking through you know these like bodies and like these some of these people that we defeated and stuff we had talked before about how we couldn't carry around a bunch of you know looted items but is there any way we could like gather a few valuables and and trade them in for for something no uh yeah they all just like vanish disappear all the valuable swords it's like we left the room in

zelda and came back here so we don't have to do the whole thing but like do you think that we'd be able to get enough between the 55 platinum that we had and all that stuff to get a like a wand of cure light wounds before we go into this cave and uh as you're going through you see some of the bodies of these beast orc tamers. The one that, you know, you're obviously the one with the dogs. You already looted the body. But the two that were at the Hope Spring

that were with the giant and then the one that had the monitor lizard during the barricade. They all had two potions of cure light wounds on them. So you get six potions of cure light wounds. And yeah, the rest of the stuff is like broken weapons, and then there's like barrels of goods that clearly belong to the townspeople. So you're not going to go after those, I'm assuming.

No. But everything else is, yeah, you should have enough at this point with what you've accumulated both at the Plague House and throughout this adventure to at least buy a good wand. Okay. So we'll trade that stuff in for a wand of Cure Light Wounds, which will give us a good backup for an extended fight if we have to keep fighting underground here.

And you want me to take the... Yeah, and I'll give the old wand that had five charges left in it to gormley because she can use it now because now she can cast cure light wounds that's one of her spells so um so she'll take that and i'll take the brand new wand with 50 charges which it lasts us for at least two episodes we should set an over underunder for how long that's going to last. One. I'm betting the under. I'll take the under and the points.

I think, oh, so we have six potions of cure light wounds. So how do you guys want to split them up? Well, you guys would each take two because I do not need them because I have the wand and I have my spells. So three of us will each take two potions of cure light wounds. And then, yeah, I think, I mean, the general idea here is rest and then go into the cave right isn't that the the plan is there anything else that needs to get done uh i did want to i did some shopping just assuming that we'd have the chance and i got myself a buckler i traded in the silver the steel shield that we found for a buckler, which will allow me to fire my crossbow without penalty.

But it raises my AC by one, so that's good. And then something else that I discovered, because we haven't recorded for a while, something I discovered in the intervening time is that I shortchanged myself one domain for Galabras. That's right. changed myself one domain for Galabras. That's right. So I knew I had the luck domain, but because of the program that we use, PCGen, which is a great program,

but I did something wrong at the very beginning of character creation, and I followed the prompts, and it only prompted me to pick one domain. I realized that all clerics get two. So in addition to the luck domain, I also took the travel domain, which I thought would be kind of appropriate because Goliath was initially motivated by travel to see the world. So

that gives me a couple other new little powers and some different domain spells and stuff. And travel is also a Desna domain, right? Yes. It is fall under Desna's purview. So yeah. The luck of the open road. Yep. So do you get a lot of new things,

like just one new domain spell and power? Well, it boosts my base movement speed by 10 feet, which is really nice. Oh, that's sweet. So cool. And I can use an ability called Agile Feet six times per day. So for six rounds each day, Galabras can ignore difficult terrain,

treat it like it's normal terrain. That is pretty clutch. I know we can get in front of him in other games. My brother-in-law has a cleric that is the travel domain, and we made so much fun of him because he kept trying to use agile feet. It'll be like a boss fight. Now, can I use agile feet? Is that going to help defeat this?

We're going to fight a giant that's just going to throw banana peels at us, like a Mario Kart, and he's going to need it. Defeat this We're gonna fight a giant That's just gonna throw Banana peels at us Like an aria cart And he's gonna need it Well it's funny Because we kept making Fun of him for being You're so useless But

Like now That he's like In our other game He's like ninth level He basically turns into Nightcrawler Because he can like Teleport

And like do all this Crazy stuff So I'm really I have no expectation At all that Calabras Will live that long But were he to do that, it's going to be fucking great.

So, you know, I'm not skipping to the next day, but we'll say on the next day, like on your way back to the cave, you just kind of stop at an armory and say, can I just get that buckler? And you take this. I have a coupon. Not just any armor. Clamor, we saved her life. I have a gift certificate

Is there anything else you guys want to do before you rest down for the night? Gormley would like to try to learn two of the scrolls and put them into Howie so she can cast them Let me get these spells in you, girl Open your mouth! No, but actually the process for a witch is familiar.

The familiar does have to eat the ashes or the paste made from the scroll. That's right. It's kind of creepy. I guess we should talk about how you learn scrolls because it's a volatile process where it could go awry. It is. And for a witch, it's a little different. Wait, do you want to explain this? Nerd.

Skid's got something plain to do. It is time for Nerdy. We're such nerds. This is Matthew sitting in for Skid. On nerdage. On nerdage. Yeah, so for a scroll, the process takes an hour per level of the spell learned. So the scrolls I'm going to learn are Charm Person, which is level one,

and Summon Swarm, which is level two. And during that time, you burn the scroll and use its ashes to create a special brew or powder. Oh, that's so awesome. That's consumed by the familiar. This sounds like a fucking great idea for a cooking show. Watch out, Food Network. Scrolls with Gormley.

Cook it with Scrolls. Correct me if I'm wrong, but unlike other casters, if you try to learn Scrolls and you fail, you actually can try again the next day. In this process, the Scroll is destroyed. So you can't. So I can't. Oh.

Well, yeah. You're burning it into ashes. So after that time, I have to make a spellcraft check, which is DC 15 plus the spell level. Okay. So you have like a DC 16 check for the first level spell? Do you want to try it in the morning

and then I can give you a bit of luck? Why don't I do the charm person first and I'll give myself guidance. Okay. And then tomorrow we'll do a bit of luck. Okay. Unless you have a bit of luck tonight. You don't.

You use it up. Okay. Now, does something happen like if you fail by five or more, something bad happens? No, that's when you're using a scroll to cast it.

Okay. So you either learn it or it gets destroyed. Or it's gone. Okay. All right. So I'm going to do charm person now. So I'm going to give myself guidance.

I give myself the plus one. And I rolled a, I got it. i rolled a 24 yeah so how he's like you gotta keep that luck rolling man keep that luck rolling keep on going eating these ashes that's awesome how he chokes and dies all right so so uh now you have charm person which means you can like make somebody like us that normally wouldn't exactly good explanation let's get locked up wrapped itrapped it up. Hey.

All right. So yeah, I'll do the next one in the morning. So Skid can give me a bit of luck. Okay. Okay. So we're going back. And guidance also. And guidance.

Sweet. Yeah. So how many bit of lucks do you get per day, Skid? Six. Okay. Thanks, Galabras. Sorry. That's very generous of Galabras.

No problem. No problem. Okay. And Baron, anything you want to do before bed? Say your prayers, eat your vitamins? Just get myself a little scrub on if there's a little bath and take my leathers off, really let it all hang out. I'm kind of like that guy in the football locker room

that was way too comfortable being naked around everyone, just walking around. Hey, guys, great job out there today. Pat and Galabras on the bus. No one's more uncomfortable than Galabras. This tiny dwarf penis jiggling around. I just have a bit of ale before I go to bed. Best way to sleep.

The Ramble House survived. Yes, yes, because the attack all happened in the inner quarter and the Ramble House was way on the other side of town. And obviously the main thing was they were trying to break through the barricades and you guys halted that attack. So the majority of the fighting happened outside of the walls of True Now. Lork, what about you, man?

Anything you need to do before bed? No, Lork is pretty, um, quiet. Yeah. I think he's, he's, uh, a little, he's mourning. He's in mourning. Right. But he, yeah, he didn't want to sleep in that house. So he's, uh, he's going to stay at the Ramble house with these guys and he doesn't have

much to say. Um, so back to room 28. Trapless room 28. 28. It's your lucky number. Um, and back to room 28. Trapless room 28. 28, it's your lucky number. And it's trapped. Okay, uh, Cham shows you to her room, shows you all to your room, and, uh, you guys get, uh,

the most restful sleep one can get with bumps and bruises and cuts. And scars are emotional than physical. And I want to check the false bottom to see if anything else has been put in there. Did anyone leave us any notes? I think Galabras has to almost be carried. Yeah, he's so utterly exhausted,

I think he needs assistance. How old is Galabras again? He's 21, but his constitution's 10, so it's very average. And this is just an incredibly intense experience, physical experience, mental, that we've been through. Yeah, it's pretty brutal. Well, Cham puts you on her back. Right.

A little halfling. Come on, kid. I can ride in her pouch, which I believe halflings. Halflings are marsupials? Halflings are marsupials, so I just ride around in her pouch. I'll make a man out of you yet, she says. All right, so... Sun rises.

And you guys get eight hours of rest. Nice. You wake up to find Galabras meditating, I'm assuming. Doing his morning meditation. So now, once you're done with that, Gormley's going to want to try to learn this scroll. So do you give me... Yeah, I give her a touch, Gormley.

Sensuously? Respectfully. Respectfully. Respectfully on the boob. Yeah, on her inflatable witch boob. There's a lot of talk about Gormley's boobs in this podcast. That's the only pair we have. With a dunce.

Alright, I'm also... Dunce. Dunce. We really should stop talking. I'm done. And on that note, I'm going to cast guidance on myself and see what happens. And I got it. Oh, man!

So that's a 19. Do you want me to roll again? Yeah, let's see. I rolled a 5, so it helped. Hey, man. All right. So that's a 19. Do you want me to roll again? Yeah, let's see. I rolled a five, so it helped. Hey, all right. All right. Good job. Bit of luck.

All right, so now I have Summon Swarm, but I actually don't have it prepared for today. But Howie knows it. I do, however, have Vomit Swarm. Oh. What is that? It's basically Summon Swarm, but instead of summoning it in some location, I just vomit out a swarm of spiders.

Like the Green Isle. Yeah. Awesome. What a fucking freak. I'm surprised you saw that movie. It's good. Don't really studiously avoid good movies. It was a toss-up between that and Jurassic Park.

All right. So, yeah, you guys make your way back to Blood March Hill, yeah? To the opening in this cave. Yeah, to the cave next to the Hope Spring. Oh, I wanted to ask, if Galabras gets a chance, someone who's in the know, or I could do it now that's local, or someone here could, the name Bloodmarch Hill, does anyone know

the history of that name? How it got that name? That's an excellent question. 20. Does the Dungeon Master know? You rolled a 20, knowledge history? No, knowledge local. That's more appropriate, yeah.

So, what you would know, it's kind of like ancient knowledge. So no one quite knows exactly what happened, but centuries ago there was a big battle between humans and orcs that took place, and I think the last stand ended up happening at Bloodmarch Hill, which eventually led to the founding of True Now because it was the one time the humans were able to hold them back. Because I think I mentioned before in a previous episode the sort of borderlines of True Now and Last Wall

and the holds of Belkson has always been shifting based on this long-standing war of attrition between the humans and the orcs, the orc tribes. And so centuries ago, there was a last stand on here, and clearly the humans were victorious, which makes it all the more strange that why are they trying to get under Bloodmarch Hill? And perhaps what lies underneath will yield more information

as to what happened here. Maybe it wasn't just like a coincidental battlefield. Maybe there was something we're finding here that's been lost to our knowledge. Yeah, I'm wondering that. If you think about how chaotic orc governments are and how unorganized parts of Belkson are from what I've kind of known,

is that it could take some time for them to get organized enough or to have a leader that might know about something really weird underneath the city to want to come get it i'm wondering if either along the lines of what you were saying i think that there's a possibility that there's something about so there's something maybe something there's a reason that they chose this place to make their last stand that there's um there's there's something beneath the hill that may have affected the outcome of that battle. Doomsday device? Perhaps.

Do we have any knowledge? I can roll for this, but did anyone know that there was this cave underneath the hill? Or was it open? Was that common knowledge that there was? No, it's certainly something to inspect when you get to the mouth of the cave um because there were these these specific graffiti things all around town uh that galavris realized that early on that they perhaps were marking digging sites and underneath the plague house was one of those yeah uh and they dug in and never found uh what they were looking

for so they stopped and that was an old sanctuary which led me to believe that yeah might be digging underground wrong to thank you sanctuary and it's funny too because like they marked it all with that that symbol the sort of Desna that kind of fucked up of Yoma die and in in the plague house there is that original sort of a Yoma die symbol like etched into the floor in that room right so I wonder if that yeah because that the lower levels didn't uh didn't take to the burning like the upper levels did when they uh very very interesting okay well let's go to this and it's a good discussion you guys are having on the way over there like trying to piece together what the hell is going on yeah i was thinking about i was imagining us walking and like

collaboration this conversation you know what immediately popped into my mind like completely unrelated was was like how lork must be just like limping like the whole way there because he's like been feeding on adrenaline for hours and hours and hours through the night and he's got this like bad knee and he wakes up in the morning and it's just like swollen and he's like oh oh he's like trying to like massage it out a little bit his back hurts he's like and it's just like swollen and he's like oh oh he's like trying to like massage it out a little bit his back hurts he's like and it did rain the night before exactly exactly i could have told i could have told you rain was coming uh it's like a labris is like kind of punch drunk too he's like kind of shaking because he was running on adrenaline all day too and he's

just like kind of almost giddy and shaking yeah so he's just like limping through town like oh man lark yeah it's interesting you would have a different reaction though because you've killed people before plenty of times and been in lots of battles and galabras has really just been it's kind of like how i imagine the first time i like beat the shit out of someone like it i felt awesome while it was happening and and then afterwards I was shaking like I wish it never happened. It's awful. The first of the many times Grant has beat the shit out of someone. I'm coming to you, Brian Posehn.

Watch out. Fucking dead. He's in training. I'm glad we were able to get you out of prison in time to do this podcast. All right, so as you're walking through town and you go back through the inner quarter and it's a little more cleaned up, there's blood all over the

dirt and whatnot, but you don't see the same. It's not littered with bodies. You get outside of town and make your way to the Hope Spring and there's just smoke filling the air as they've taken the corpses of all the orcs and built a, and just burning them.

Yeah. You know, so even though it's morning or dawn, whatever time you want it to be, there is a bit of a haze in the air, a gray haze from the smoke. Smoke. And you just still, the stench of death is, the only thing that's overcoming that is the stench of fire and burned flesh.

And you get to the Hope Spring, and you get to the hill, and the big opening, and there are four guards standing outside. Rogers' Days to Save event is back, with our most incredible deal yet on our most reliable internet enjoy Rogers Ignite internet now starting at just $50 a month backed by our Wi-Fi satisfaction guarantee visit rogers.com good morning

gentlemen thank you for keeping an eye on the cave last night while we got some rest We'd like to make our way in now Anyone come or go? No, no, it's been very quiet We haven't even heard a sound inside No one ventured inside, obviously

But no one came out Before we go in If they grant us entrance Can I do a survival check to see what tracks? I know we were described a person and some wolves. So I just wanted to see if there was anything else I could garner from that. Sure. Check.

19. You don't see anything unusual. You see the guard tracks kind of pacing back and forth mingled with other tracks the tracks that went in so at the mouth of the cave you can see like a larger figure a smaller figure and some animal

paw prints but they're all kind of glossed over from the mist from the waterfall okay can we inspect the cave? yeah Baron use your knowledge of stone to see what you can determine about this cave. Anything unusual about the cave?

Is it natural? Is it carved out? How long ago, if so? So do you enter into it? The guards will let you pass. Yeah, so we'll start to walk through. While he's rolling that, is it possible for me to roll a survival check to determine if the one set of tracks is equivalent with the troll tracks we got at this plague house? So that we can identify it for sure as a troll.

Is that even possible? Yeah, do you want to do survival? Survival, yeah. Sure, try it. To identify it as the same track that I identified at the plague house. Natural 20. It does look like a troll. Okay.

Same kind of troll? Flood troll? You can't quite tell, but it's definitely a troll. We suspected as much, and I think we're right. Yeah. I mean, it's just one of those, they all have very similar feet. Time to get the brother. So I rolled a natural 20 as well.

So I have a 29 To notice things about the cave How it was made Unusual stonework Traps, hidden doors And stone walls or floors Wow You both rolled natural 20s

Yeah You've been trying to use knowledge You've both rolled consecutive 20s Yeah, natural 20s on a skill check Yeah And you've been trying to use that knowledge stone cutting thing Both rolled like consecutive 20s. Yeah, natural 20s on a skill check. El hermano's 20. And you've been trying to use that knowledge stone cutting thing for- You should tell me every time I pass within 10 foot of anything unusual to get a check to see it.

Or you should make the check, Troy. Yeah. You should get his number, his bonus, and make the check. Well, I will say this is probably the first time that you have come across something rather interesting. Nice. Thanks, Calabras, for reminding me of my own character. You're welcome. this is probably the first time that you have come across something rather interesting. Ooh! Nice! Thanks, Calabras, for reminding me of my own character. You're welcome. Always nice of a dwarf.

So as you enter the cave, you see these sort of gossamer cobwebs hanging from the ceiling of... That's a poem. ...what looks to be a rather rough tunnel. I mentioned before the mists, the misty spray from the Hope Springs waterfall kind of glimmers faintly on these elements of spider silk

hanging from the ceiling. In front of you, chunks of rubble lie scattered on the floor amid piles of dirt. Baron comes up and starts inspecting things, and you notice two things of interest One, that the tunnel looks like it was carved out centuries ago Oh I know old stonework

It is not a natural occurrence This was dug specifically And surrounded by your spellcasting friends, you are imbued with a sense of knowledge that this cave was sealed with a spell. Rude.

Many, many years ago. Perfect. Wow. So they must have broken the spell, is what we would think. The people who came in here last night. I mean. They had the means.

It seems as if they enlisted the help of this giant to physically break through whatever was warding. Okay. Makes sense. Makes sense. Wow. Can I detect magic to see what kind of spell it was? Sure. I'm going to do that.

Okay. Roll a spellcraft check. Twelve. You get the sense that it was warded with stone shape. They just melded this, and they broke through, and now there is a tunnel that is not natural. Okay. Is there any markings on the walls?

Is there any language? Nope, it's just rough, hewn rock. Is there any drawings of orcs on horseback? So I turn to the group and I let them know it's not naturally occurring. And I say, this is some shoddy stonework, though. There ain't a room nowhere to be seen. Because we like to decorate the shit out of our tunnels when we dig them. So someone not as crafty must have done this.

This place is not of dwarven make. Nope. Interesting. All right. How far in are we? Is this the first hundred feet? Five, ten feet in. You're just kind of assessing this immediately.

You know, really just examining the mouth of the cave in the first five, ten feet in. Okay. So was the stone that was on the outside that people would see in True Now, was that a stone-shaped magical blockage that people just thought was a natural chunk of stone in the hill? Yes. Oh, okay. And I'd have to look up stone-shaped, but I think you actually take, you create stone.

I think it's you take existing stone and mold it into whatever you want. Yeah, so whatever this was is leading to something. And they used stone-shaped to close it. To closed it. To close it. To close it. To close it.

Galavris is going to cast light on his gauntlet so his hand glows like a torch. That is good because you can see up ahead the area that you're entering into is total darkness. All right, well, in that case, Gormley will also pick up a smaller piece of rubble and cast light on it and hold it up like a torch. Okay, and I think Baron and Lork have darkvision, yes?

That is correct. Okay, so now none of you will be encumbered unless your light goes out. What do you do? Lork is happy to lead the way, just sort of following tracks. I'd like to do a survival check to follow tracks and start walking. I can be right behind you just so I can give you the luck if you need it. Okay.

I have, as I'm walking through, I kind of am acting like a mystic on like a cheap TV show. on like a cheap TV show. Like reaching my hands out and scanning everything way too closely and looking for unusual traps, things, and the floor and the stone. Right, right, okay. I'll let you know if you come across anything. Okay.

So the... I feel something. Do I need to roll any perception or survival or is it like a pretty plain floor? No, I'm just gonna roll your survival check over. Okay. Yeah, I mean, it's dirt and rock, but it's clear that someone has been

through here in the past 24 hours and it matches the tracks that you've already seen. And you guys continue down the hall, the tunnel rather, and it's just you go about 50 feet in and you can barely hear the waterfall anymore because you're just surrounded by stone.

And even though you're right in the middle of Trunau, you feel as if you've been transported to a completely different place. You get 100 feet in, and again, just darkness. The cavern lit only by Galabras' gauntlet, and your... Gormley's pebble. Gormley's pebble. Gormley's pebble.

They're fruity pebbles. And it's casting these giant shadows of you on the wall. It's very eerie. And you're going through cobwebs and whatnot, like Indiana Jones style. And you go 150 feet down this tunnel before it finally opens up into a large cavern. As you approach it, you feel all of a sudden

it was really hot for a while going through there, but now the air has changed to be rather humid and cool, and you notice a thin sheen of condensation coating the rocky walls at the end of the tunnel leading to the cavern. As you enter the cavern, everything just opens up, and you hear rushing water. So you assume that the waterfall and the Hope Spring itself

went through natural crevices in the rocks and formed these pools or whatever it could be in this chamber that you're entering into. You see a narrow passage to your right exiting the cavern down deeper into darkness. To the south, so directly in front of you on the other end of the cavern, you can see the floor just dropping away into darkness.

And then to your left, you see a bridge of stone that looks as if it's leading to another cavern in the east. And you just hear like trickling water, and you can see on that bridge, there's water on either side as well. And I'll bring out the map, and you guys can just show me where you would like to be placed. So Lorca's in front.

Put me behind you, Baron. I can always give you a little guidance. Galabras and Baron are standing side by side behind him, and Gormley is standing behind Baron. This is really nerve-wracking. So the only sound you hear at first is the trickling of water rushing down, slowly dripping through crevices above and below

to the side of you. And then all of a sudden you hear... Fucking rat. And you see this tiniest, tiniest little baby rat come scurrying right up to Lork's foot. And Lorks looks down at it. And as you look at it, it starts slowly changing

into a translucent state. Motherfucking fuck! And then all of a sudden you hear a squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, and a hundred swarm of shadow rats All of a sudden you hear a squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak item from that chest though, right? That we could have used to kill the Shadow Rats the first time? Yeah, man. Ghost and Durge. Hundred of them. Alright.

Who's got over 20? 27 for Gormley. So you rolled a natural 20? I did. You guys are in your 20s. Okay, anybody else over 20? Exactly did. You guys are in your 20s. Okay. Anybody else have a 20? Exactly 20. Oh, okay. Lork, what'd you get? 8. 8 for Lork. Long drop down. 18, motherfucker.

Whoa! 18, motherfucker. Okay. It is Gormley's turn. Round 1. Alright. Well, I can't use the Ghostbane Dirge, so I assume that Galapagos is carrying it. But it can only target one creature. Right now, for what it's worth,

they do not look as if they've changed yet. They look to be in their corporeal form. Oh, okay. Is it a swarm? A swarm counts as one creature. It counts as one creature, so... Right? It's a swarm, right?

Right, and they all appear to be in their corporeal form. There's like a hundred of them just crawling over each other. Over each other, yeah, yeah. Just rushing at you. I mean, I could Burning Hands the swarm, but I don't want to waste the spell, you know? No, it's not a waste. It's actually, I think it's a great idea. I agree.

Because we know Troy's showing us the picture that we all know all too well of the uh ghost main when you're fighting swarms I'm pretty sure it's great to have something that isn't targeted like burning hands where it's just like you're hitting an area because then you can get them all in that like they're all in a close-knit space but I think that you actually get bonuses to your damage for that I think think. Yeah, burning hands is the perfect thing. That's what I'll do. Could I borrow 2D for? You sure can.

Can I borrow a feeling? I'll borrow a feeling. Well, you're going to have to position yourselves. You're going to have to move up to within 15 feet of them. Yeah, so Gormley will step up. Her hands will start to glow red, and she'll shoot out cones of searing flame at the swarm. Yeah, so Gormley will step up. Her hands will start to glow red.

And she'll shoot out cones of searing flame at the swarm. And does... Are you kidding me? Whoa, did you roll three fours? Yeah. Maximum damage. Maximum damage. So that's 12 damage. Are there bonuses?

No, I don't think so. No. Is it plus one per level? No. No. It's plus... 3d4 for level three reflex half or anything reflex have yeah okay um awesome you guys are rolling rocks yeah dc14 on that true dc14 reflex save yeah all right they made the reflex save so six points of damage six points

of damage and it would make sense mean, there's all these things. But you definitely catch a good portion of them. Did you check the swarm traits on that? In what sense? That it might do more damage because it's an AoE spell. I think it does plus 50% damage. Yep. Half, again, as much damage from spells that affect.

So it would take nine points of damage. Yeah. Well, no. Does it take half the total before the reflex save? No, no, no. So it would take six damage, and then it adds another three. All right, nice job. Nice job. Well done.

Gourmet. All right, Baron the Gunslinger. So can Baron do a quick survival or perception check to see how hurt the swarm looks? I don't know if that works with a swarm. There's just so many things. You saw a handful of the rats burn up, but they're still... And they seem corporeal now, right?

They do indeed. I am going to take a step to the right of Gormley and I am going to pull out a little pull out a bag of flash powder. Ooh. Go on. Yes.

Tell me more. Are they ten feet away from us? Yeah, from you, yeah I'm going to throw the bag as hard as I can into the middle of them And You roll a fortitude save Okay, you have to roll to throw it ranged. Sure.

So I think, what is it, AC 5 for a specific square? I don't know. I think it's AC 10, I thought. That makes sense. Yeah, I think AC 10 to hit a specific square. That's a natural 20. Okay, so you boom right in the middle of the swarm. And it's a fortitude save?

Mm-hmm, DC 13. We've rolled so many 20s And it's a fortitude save DC 13 We've rolled so many 20s it's nuts I made it The swarm made it Then they're fine So nothing happens And what does this thing look like It's like flash powder

So it's just It's like a firework that didn't work It just sits there and then you start crawling over and it disappears. Sorry, I was trying to do something cool with the blinding. It probably got wet as you were walking under the waterfall. Galabras. Galabras is going to ready an action.

The minute they turn incorporeal, he's going to use the spell of Ghostbane Dirge on them. I can't remember, was it a scroll? Yeah. Oh, so we gotta actually roll to see if something bad happens. All right. Okay, it's the swarm's turn. The first thing they do,

they go incorporeal. Galabras. Okay, so I'm going to, I'm holding the scroll up, and I... Cost its magics! Okay, and now how do we do this? Now it's a spellcraft check? No, I have read magic, so...

I think it's automatic, right? Is it a first-level spell? Yeah. Is it? Or no? Is it on your spell list? It's a cleric spell, I think a it's a cleric spell i think it's a cleric spell yeah uh then yeah then if it's in your spell list and you are of a level to cast it then it's automatic you don't even have to roll wait i have read magic too so when we did

when i learned the spell does that affect anything no it's a second level spell and learning the spell is different than like trying Trying to use the scroll. Yeah, it's trying to use the scroll. Yeah, so you can use it without, you don't have to roll. Yeah. Okay. Awesome. So you just, boom, ghostbane dirge.

And so now they will take... Thank you. So now they will take 50% damage from physical attacks. 50% from physical as opposed to taking zero. Awesome. That is huge. Very huge. It is as if the party is learning from their mistakes.

Awesome, okay, so now this incorporeal swarm of rats, the swarm comes up, enters the space of Baron and Gormley, and you both take one point of strength damage and roll a DC 15 fortitude save. Made it. Failed it. Failed it! Baron starts vomiting violently.

Oh no! And he is now nauseated for one round. Ah. God. Means he can only take a move action and cannot attack, cast spells, or concentrate. Lork's turn. Okay, Lork is going to move up and swing through the swarm,

the mound of shadow rats with his greataxe. Okay. 14 to hit. 14 to hit. Misses. Damn. Rough round one.

Okay, it is round two, and it is Gormley's turn. So what are they doing? Are they just, like just crawling over me? They're crawling up your legs. They're all around you. One of them, but you feel a nip on your ankle, and they just all of a sudden feel a little bit weaker. So can I do an escape arse to get out of there?

You can just move out of there. Just move, so I can just withdraw. Can I move with a move action, or do I have to? Does that incur an attack of opportunity with swarms? I don't think swarms get attack of opportunity. Yeah, I don't think so. I think that you can move action, or do I have to? Does that incur an attack of opportunity with swarms? I don't think swarms get attack of opportunities. Yeah, I don't think so. I think that you can move out, yeah. All right, so I'm going to move out to my max move,

and then I'll fire my crossbow at the swarm. You know what? To be fair, I forgot, when a swarm moves onto your space, you guys get an attack of opportunity. So let's go back and just let you guys each roll your attack. And you had done the ghost beam before. Right. Sorry, there's a lot of moving parts.

So Baron, what was your attack? I'm up close and deadly. 16 against touch. 16 against touch hits. Seven points of damage. Seven points of damage, okay. And Gormley, your attack of opportunity. Gormley rolled a 13.

13 misses. And now it is Gormley's actual turn. All right, and Gormley will move out of the way, so six squares, I guess, and then take a shot with the crossbow. You can't move and shoot a crossbow. I can't do the move. It's already loaded. Oh, so what did you do for your attack of opportunity? Oh, shoot, I did

use that. Alright, so I'll... You fucking liar! Cheating! So you just want to move out of there and load? Yeah, let's do that. Alright. Baron, you notice that none of the rats barely were affected by the hit.

It seemed like they maybe half noticed it. It seemed like they almost quarter noticed it. Yeah, because it's, oh no, his gun is bludgeoning. Oh, the gun's bludgeoning? Yep, bludgeoning and piercing. Bludgeoning and piercing. Okay. All right, so Gormley, you just move back and reload your crossbow?

Yep. Okay. Baron. Vomiting. Baron can only retreat, correct? Yes. Baron is going to retreat. All right.

Jalabrus. Can I do a... Poor Lork. First thing that happens, I'll have all my strength taken away in the cave. First thing that happens.'ll have all my strength Taken away In the cave First thing that happens So awful You guys can see

Basically the entire party Back to the tunnel And Lorcas just We should have bought A wand of restore strength How do you miss Just a huge Writhing mound

Of a hundred Erats I want to do a Religion check To see if these Are It's a huge, writhing mound of a hundred rats. Galabras, I want to do a religion check to see if these are, if they're undead, if they have undead traits. Sure. And I rolled a 23. They do. Okay.

So Galabras is going to channel offensively. Ooh. He's going to use his channel positive energy to hurt undead creatures. Galabras, why didn't you do this the first time? Sorry, sorry, sorry. I'm thinking back. You know what it was? It's because the dungeon master threw the mouth

of a fucking punk kid, tricked us into going into that fight after I'd already spent all my channels. Don't shoot the messenger. That was it exactly. I'm going to shoot

the messenger. Don't shoot the guy whose fault it was completely. Yeah, don't play me. It was just my fault. All right, so you're going to channel offensively.

I'm going to channel offensively. Eight. Eight. And what is that? Will save or something? So will save and the... Failed the will save.

Yeah, sweet. Okay. So, boom, you see a bunch of the rats start getting... Like they're in a microwave. They're just exploding. They're just popping

to pop the word. Lorke eats one. Mmm, undead. Delicious. My favorite flavor. And Orc loses all strength. Okay. So now it is the shadow rats' swarms turn.

Orc standing right next to them, all of a sudden sees in their incorporeal state, they start to blend into the shadows with their body and just 50% mischance. Well, can they do that, though, if they have the Ghostbane Dirge on them? Because they're corporeal while that's in effect. Right, this is a second effect. But is it reliant on their being incorporeal?

Well, I think they still remain incorporeal. Yeah, it's because they are shadow rats. Their undead thing makes them ghosts, but their shadow part makes them blend in darkness. Okay, so you can't see them. They are semi-physical under the undergrowth. So it's a 50% mischance. But the good point for you guys now is that is its move action,

and so that's all it can do this round. Oh, awesome. But now every attack, you have to roll a 50% mischance, and it is Lork's attack. Here we go. Swinging away. I rolled a 24 to hit.

That is a hit. And a five on their concealment. Out of a fucking five out of 100. So Lork just like, ah, boom, hits the ground right next to him. God, I hate concealment. I can never get through it. All right, so he's obviously going to retreat. Retreat, yeah.

Retreat! I'm so glad we bought that wand now that you have to use up all your channels to explode these rams. I know. So, Lork retreats to the start of the stone bridge. And it is now round three, Gormley's turn. I knew you guys would love seeing these guys again. Oh, man.

And hundreds of them. Great, great. Yeah, so exciting. We almost all wiped to one one all right Gromley's gonna shoot with the crossbow okay that would be a 13 to hit once again you see them just eat the shaft hey hey I can recover those all right Baron you're true chef I'm just talking about chef Baron you are no longer nauseated I'm reloading and what do I have to roll higher than unconcealment

in order to hit them 51 or above yeah 70 yeah I rolled a 79 okay and what is the Yeah 70 Yeah I rolled a 79 Okay and what is the roll to hit 22 Nice Shotgun Oh one damage

So no damage No it's minimum one That's a minimum one It can't be less than one no damage. No, it's minimum one. That's the minimum one? Half damage? Well, no. It can't be less than one. It can't be less than one. But you always round down. You can't round down a portion

below that. I believe that's what works. I'm going to give it to you. Because you're going to need it. There's like 94 rats. You see one of them just limp away. It's not even dead. It just limps away. Now I'm mad! Galactus. I'm going back to my

wife. I don't know who talked me into getting in this swarm in the first place. I blame the parents. Typical mob mentality in a rat swarm. I'm going to channel offensively again. Six.

Six. We'll save. That was a 13. That saves. That saves. So what did you say? Three damage. So Galabras does more damage to them.

And now it's their turn. And of course, they swarm towards Lork. Yes. With an attack of opportunity. Alrighty. These guys can move pretty far, too. 17 to hit. 17 hits.

63 concealment. 63 concealment. Oh, here we go. Let's do it. Dimash. 16 damage. Oh! Max damage. Do you have a magical weapon?

No. Okay. What are you hitting with? A masterwork greataxe. Is that slashing? Yeah. So is that even less than? Yeah, it'll be a quarter. It's quarter damage, but still, I mean, that's what you want to do. Okay, and then it does strength damage to

your friend and mine Lork four points of strength damage obviously to Lork and you need to roll a DC 15 fortitude

oh this one again shit so they're just surrounding your feet and like crawling up your left and you just feel bite bite bite bite bite

bite bite bite 14 and you start vomiting all over them. Oh, God, God. Well, it doesn't matter anyway. That's fine. Because I'm just going to run and continue running in a circle until this fight is over.

Because I'm not stepping anywhere near these things. Two yakety sacks. Lork is just running around the cave vomiting on himself. All right, and it's Lork's turn. And so for your turn, you vomit. Do you want to move? is just running around the cave vomiting on himself. Alright, it's Lork's turn, and so for your turn, you vomit. Do you want to move? Yeah. Four strength damage.

Come on. Yeah, that's ridiculous. Okay, I'm just going to keep trying to run away. Draw. Okay, so you just kind of run back to where they, basically almost where they appeared up that southern drop-off. Right. Okay. And now Lork is on one side of the cavern,

and the other three are on the other one, so just try to make it decide. There's like an evil orc in the balcony, just watching this, grinning and laughing at us. Round four, Gormley. Can I do a quick perception to see the state of the swarm? Sure. You know, I'll just tell you,

they have been maybe one third of their numbers, two thirds of their numbers have started to dwindle off, so it's becoming smaller. They're dying. They're definitely dying, and Galabras has been doing the majority of the damage. All right, Gormley's going to cast Summon Monster 1. Whoa, all right.

Okay. So Galabras begins, excuse me, Gormley begins, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, Baron. Baron is going to five foot step. Actually, he's going to stay back here. And he's going to roll to hit. I'll stay back here. And he's going to roll to hit.

So that made concealment. That was a 11 to touch. Misses. I don't like rolling all the dice. You rolled one damage again, too. No, I didn't. Dad insult injury. You got to roll two dice for the percentile dice For the concealment

Because if you roll like a 50 Then if the other This is my ten sided die for the other one I didn't roll an eight sided die Thanks for the lesson asshole Since this all happens in life I just know that you know so much less than I do Since this all happens

in the span of seconds, this thing comes out and Baron's just like, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, shoot. Missing. I nailed him when they first got me. I got him now. Oh god, oh god, oh god. Galabras. I don't want to use all of my channels

against these fucking rats, but there's absolutely once again, nothing that we can do to defeat them. We should just pick one of the tunnels and run down. What round is this? This is round foe. I just summon the monsters. Don't forget, you did get that cure-lie wounds. Did you summon a monster that can channel positive energy?

No, but it can distract the swarm, can't it? Oh, yeah. I think you just got it. It can battle my summoning. That's an idea. I think we... It's up to you. We have that wand now, like Joe was saying,

so I'm not as concerned about you doing it unless you think of some other cool ways. The strength damage is... I doubt that we're going to fight any more undead creatures. And I do have lesser restoration, so I can bring your strength back yeah how many channels do you get now at third level it's the same it's five it never goes up yeah could you rest could you prepare for an hour no and that's something else that's time I discuss what we should discuss that next episode. I'm going to... I'm going to channel again.

You're a good man, Galabras. You're a good man. Where are your gold dice? I didn't bring them out. Offensively, I don't use gold dice. Fucking six again. Fuck. Where are my gold dice?

Where are they? They're in my bag They save but again The beauty of the channel Even though it sucks to burn your channels There's no concealment for channeling And now It is their turn

And they come up To the mouth of the tunnel and go after Baron. Fuck you. And Galabras. I get my attack of opportunity. You both get an attack of opportunity. Not that it matters.

He's like, yeah, go ahead, guys, attack. Attack it. Cunt. Fuck. Fuck. Is that a hit? That's my celebratory exclamation. 14.

Baron 14. Okay. Against touch? Against touch? Yeah. Oh, yeah, because they're fucking rats. I'll give you a spoiler alert. Their touch AC is the same as their regular AC.

Yep, yep, yep. You both take one point of strength damage, and let's see if you're puking. DC, 15 fortitude save. Nope. Roll on the big die. Collaboration. DC, what?

15. 15. Cursed is going to come in looking for us after like a day and a half. And he's just going to find us 30 feet in, all completely strengthless, laying on the ground, just wasting away. In pools of your own vomit. In pools of our own vomit. With the rats just eating your body. I rolled a 16.

All right, so you're okay. You start to get the dry heaves when you see Galabras throw up, and you're like, pull it together, Brad, pull it together. Okay, and now it is Lork's turn. You know what's crazy? I can't do anything. I can't do anything.

I was like, whatever, I'll just shoot my bow into it. I can't, because it's a plus three strength rating. That's right, you can't even use your bow. So now I can't just shoot my bow into it. I can't because it's a plus three strength rating. Oh, that's right. You can't even use your bow. So now I can't even shoot my bow. Oh. So I am rendered inert. It's almost as if the writers of this adventure are really good.

Yeah, it's almost as if they were like. Or complete fucking dicks. Well, you can be both, especially when you're a writer. That's true. All right, I'm going to hold. I need time to think. I'm just going to hold. I saw Lark is like flustered. true. Alright, I will I'm going to hold. I need time to think. I'm just going to hold. He's like, I don't know what to do. You see little wounds on your

leg starting to bleed. You know what, he will actually, no, I will hold in case I can use a turn. The good thing is, you don't feel the sickness that you felt the first time you were bit by a shadow rat and you realize that in their corporeal state is when they cause filth fever on a successful bite. But they're in corporeal state.

They just sap strength. Got it. I like how you're becoming an MD just by getting every disease on the planet. Yeah, I'm a test subject. Okay, it's going to be round five. Lork is holding, and it is Gormley. You just hear Galabras. So my

celestial dog. Celestial dog? My celestial German shepherd. What's his name? It's not a Pomeranian? His name is Jerome. Jerome the celestial German shepherd. Okay, I see it.

He appears next to the rat. Okay. The rat swarm. And what does he just bark? What does he do? Does he bark? You think he would have summoned a cat. I mean, they're fucking rats.

Does he think it's the mailman? He's going to try and bite them. Okay. That's a 15 to hit. Miss. Alright. Okay, well, and then Gormley... Well, what do we want to do?

Do we want to run? Do we want to leave it to fight the dog and get out of there? I will say that Galabras has done significant damage to them I think we can get it I just have to use all of his channels all we have to do never get them back yeah I mean it's the only choice we have this nothing else yeah but I mean not this round you have no more offensive you know what I think I'm fucking encumbered again too well With the fucking strength point down. With the... Damn it!

They're not subject to mind-opening effects. But you don't have any more burning hands or anything like that. I could do ear-piercing scream. Would that do damage? I'm pretty sure you can't do anything that it targets an individual. You need AoE. AOE is clutch. Yeah. You could probably, you know.

Oh, grenade. Grenade. Grenade. I forgot about those. Yeah. I can do it. The thing that made me not want to do it was just how expensive the fuse grenades are. I'm sorry.

Just to recon for a second. 200 GP. You called your dog, but did you take your action? I haven't yet. Yeah. Okay. So it's still on you. Gormley's going to withdraw up next to Lork.

Okay, so you just kind of bolt over to the southern side of the cavern. You entered through the north. And Baron. What are we going to do, Gormley? By the way, the north remembers. Baron is going to ready an action. And that action is as soon as

Gel takes his turn. Which is just going to be a movement turn as he wipes vomit off his chin. Right. Just to let you know. He is going to himself move away from the rats as far as he can

and throw a fuse grenade at them. Okay. So on Galabras' turn, do you join Lork and Gormley across the room? Galabras? Yep. Okay, so Galabras bolts out of there, and then immediately it becomes Baron's turn.

Moving in the initiative order. All right. Oh, come on. So Baron steps back. Now, wait a minute. Lighting the grenade is a move action, yes? Oh, correct. So you can just stand there and drop it,

but you'll take some of the splash damage. Well, you can still light it. That would be so daring. Literally light it while you're in the swarm and just throw it on the ground in front of you. Perhaps even bottle cap daring. I'm going to do it. Yeah!

That is crazy! And for the listeners at home, Troy slowly raised the bottle cap up into the air. He teased it with it. Oh, wait, no, no, no. Lighting the fuse is a move action. 1D three rounds later, the grenade explodes. So after I light it, it, no, no. Lighting the fuse is a move action. 1d3 rounds later, the grenade explodes. So after I light it, it can take a round.

It can take three rounds to explode. That's how fuse grenades work. Oh, well, fuck then. That said, it is still attacking the celestial dog, so that could buy you the time. So I'm going to light it, drop it, and... No, no, no, no, no. You light it, I would think, and then

you would roll to see how many rounds. And then you would know what round to throw. You can see if the fuse is going down quickly or slowly if you have time to get out of it. That said, Grant, if you do drop it, you know it will hit. If you throw it, there is a mischance. Yeah, but I'm Dex man. Johnny Dex.

So that's two rounds. Two rounds. No, it's 1D3, right? Yeah. So it's one. If you roll the two. Oh. Yeah.

I thought one through three was one, two, three, and then four, five, six. No, I used to do one, two as one. Oh. I just thought that. It explodes next. It'll explode next round. Next round it explodes. You see all of a sudden.

What do you do? Do you just drop it? Or do you? No, you can't drop it because they could just move away. Okay. So you're just like, Oh, he could throw it.

You could also move away this round. You just let it. You can move away and keep holding. Oh, like as a double move? You can do two move actions, yeah. Sure. I mean, you were hitting orc beast tamers from like 90 feet away, so you'll probably hit these guys.

Yeah, but the closer you are, the easier the DC. Right. Okay, and it is their turn. And what do they do? They go to attack the dog and feed it. Fuck, yeah. So the dog gets an attack of opportunity. So the dog gets an attack of opportunity.

That says 19 to hit. Hit. And an 84 with the concealment. Nice. 84. Oh, okay. Roll for damage. Five points of damage.

And that is magical damage, right? Because it's a celestial creature. They are almost gone very very close and they sap the dog's strength for two points of strength and roll a fortitude save for the dog vomiting dogs

they fail the save and the dog clearly had a hairball and just blah blah blah all over the rats so just imagine this scene for a second. There's a swarm of rats going after a dog. The dog's got like three of them in his mouth and he starts vomiting all over this swarm of rats. Gagging.

Disgusting. Jerome. And Lork, you had been holding the whole time. It is now your turn. Yeah, he'll just keep, now he sees the grenade. He's gonna keep holding. Keep holding. Round five, to keep holding. Keep holding. Round five, Gormley.

The dog. The dog. So the dog just took strength damage. What does that affect? It took how many points? Two. Right. But it's vomiting.

All it can do is move this way. Right, right, right. Have him stay there. Yeah, the dog's not going to move. It's just going to stay there. That way it can keep drawing, keeping the rats on it. Okay. Galabras.

I like what you guys are doing. Just going to hold. That way it can keep drawing. Keeping the rats on it. Okay. Galabras. I like what you guys are doing. Just going to hold. Galabras holds. Baron. And Gormley will hold too for my action. Yes, okay. So you're throwing the grenade. Here it is. Which will explode this round.

Oh, that was a percentage dice. Oh, good. Thank God. I fumbled. Oh, no! Oh, good. Thank God. I fumbled. No! No! I mean, it's a ranged weapon, right? Yeah. Yeah.

Oh my God, if it's like, it hits your ally, that's going to hit all of us and explode. So he would go like this and the grenade goes behind him and hits you guys. Oh, this is... This is brutal because the reason I didn't want to use the grenade is because of how expensive

even the regular fuse ones are. They're 200 gold points. Double miss, use twice as much ammunition on this attack. No, it's fine. It doesn't count as ammunition. Ammunition is like a key. Well, then that was the perfect card to pull. So what happens now?

I just throw it and it misses? What's the miss? It sails over the bridge and lands in the pool of water. Oh, I can't believe that was our chance. I wish I got grip points back when daring acts don't work at all. But that's how that works. Now, for what it's worth, where that didn't work, Lork, Gormley, and Galavris all held their turn.

Yeah, I'm going to take my turn now. Okay. And run up and use the mace. Use my mace. I feel like... Just spray it. I feel like the housewife in a Looney Tunes commercial that when they see a rat jumps up on a table

and pulls their skirt up, that's how ineffective I've been this game. Galabras, do you want to hold your action until I shoot the crossbow? Oh, yeah, yeah. Go ahead. And I don't get to take a penalty for it to be in combat with a celestial dog, do I? He is an ally, so yeah. All right, well, there's nothing else I can do. Then you still have to do concealment as well.

So that's a.0001% chance? That's a 19 to hit with a 59 concealment. That does... Well, 19 minus 4 misses. No, you did minus the 4. Yeah. You chronically forget to minus the 4. It's a 20 to hit.

So 16. 20 to hit, 16 hits. All right! They're in range. Six points of damage. They're close enough. And you destroy the sword. Wow!. All right! They're in range. Six points of damage. They're close enough. And you destroy the sword. Wow! Oh my god. It had three hit points left and half

damage is three. And you like skewer four rats and they go off the edge of the platform. Oh my god. Splash, splash, splash, splash, splash and you kill. And then they disperse the rest of them. Goodbye, Jerome. So now there's just pools of vomit and dead rats that have regained their corporeal form laying about,

and they're no longer blended in the shadows, and you're just covered by vomit and corpses of rats. Lurk stamps on any rat that runs by him that's corporeal. Well, now that we've spent all of our spells in all of our channels. Well now that we've spent All of our spells In all of our channels So

Which way Would you like to go When you enter the cavern There was a stone bridge To your left Surrounded by Russian water I would like to go Back the way we came

To the ramble house And rest Do I I'm all for that Troy's way in Can I do a quick, Troy's way into that. Can I do a quick check to see if there's anything unusual going through any of these paths?

Yeah, like your stone check? Yeah. Yeah. I would tell you, you don't see anything, but you notice that the bridge, although ancient,

was like, clearly this was constructed. This isn't just a cave. I think that if they went anywhere into this cave, they would be following what was constructed because they're looking for something. So I imagine if we want to follow the bad guys, follow the bridge. I mean, I can roll survival to follow.

It's a specific, I get a bonus to follow tracks. That's a specific one. So I can see if they went left, right, or center. Oh, ranger, yeah. Awesome. Yeah. So roll that. Roll it. Come on, r center. Oh, Ranger, yeah. Awesome. So roll that. Roll it.

Come on, Ranger. Twelve. With a plus nine. Twelve! Twelve with a plus nine. It's actually enough under the circumstances because there isn't the splash of water like you were getting at the waterfall. Oh, okay. So these tracks, even with a twelve, there hasn't

been any other people down here that you can tell. In hundreds of years, yeah. With the exception of these critters that have come to live in this area. And you notice the tracks of a humanoid and paw prints going over the bridge. See, that was my first instinct, was I wanted to go over the bridge when we walked in before I even saw the shadow rats. I like the bridge.

I mean, yeah, it makes sense. I say it doesn't make sense to do anything else, but pursue the tracks. Yep. Um, we go bridge. Awesome. So you start to walk over the bridge and I end the episode.

Booyah. Good one, Troy. Fucking asshole. Outro Music