The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 240 - Til Breath Do Us Part

Episode Date: December 31, 2019

The heroes stumble upon an enormous magma pool guarded by unseen foes. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at ...http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:14 Everybody roll a reflex save. Oh, dear. I'm not feeling lucky. I feel unlucky. As molten horrors erupt from the floor. Glowing hot plates of iron. All right. Covering the head of this immense primordial lungfish as lava spills from between its jagged teeth.
Starting point is 00:01:34 Will they be able to stand the heat? Where the hell is that fire coming from? I don't know. Can't see a damn thing. Long enough to claim their prize. I'm going to make my way over there. I'll cover you. We might have to get out.
Starting point is 00:01:48 We might have to use magic. Oh, we can't leave it behind. Look at the size of that treasure. Not for me to set the treasure! The adventure continues. Oh, my God! Terrible, terrible business. No!
Starting point is 00:02:00 We're all dead! No. No! We're all dead! No! What is going on, everybody? It's your old pal, Troy LaVallee. And this is it. This is the last episode of the Glass Cannon Podcast for the year 2019. And what a year it has been. What a year it's been for the pod.
Starting point is 00:02:42 And what a year it's been for the network. I mean, I don't even know where to begin. I'm not even sitting here with notes in front of me. I just wanted to speak extemporaneously for a moment and really reflect on what an amazing year it's been. I remember going into this year, Joe and I knew that we were going to be going full-time before we announced it, so I knew that was going to be a big change for us.
Starting point is 00:03:06 But I was just thinking about all the things that we wanted to do, the first of which just being, you know, getting things in order, which took a long time to do. Because before Joe and I went full time, you know, we're all doing this amongst our other jobs. So being able to focus on this and only this was a huge blessing. It allowed us to really focus in on things. But I mean, that took the better part of the year, just creating a system of doing that where we weren't having to run from here and go do something else. Like we did for every year up until this year. And the other guys on the show, they didn't have that luxury. I mean, the number of times we had to record until one, two in the morning, and then Matthew and Grant had to get up at six
Starting point is 00:03:51 to go to work. I mean, just the sacrifices these guys make day in and day out, I don't tell them enough because they don't deserve to hear it. But I want you to know how appreciative I am of them and how appreciative I am of you, the listening audience.
Starting point is 00:04:05 I mean, the tour, the tour, the Glass Cannon Live that we did this year, that was the big thing that I wanted to do. And I mean, it was a resounding success. We sold out every show except Dallas, which we had no intention of selling out because it's like 600 seats. We knew we weren't going to fill that up. But I mean, 10 cities in 12 months. And I'll tell you right now, in 2020, we're going to do even more cities. I can't wait for the future of the network and the future of this show. 2020 is going to be a banner year for the Glass Cannon Network. If you've been following us since day one or you just started last week, there is so much exciting stuff on the horizon. Because now we know where this
Starting point is 00:04:47 needs to go. We know what we want to do, and now it's a matter of putting the pieces into place. So I can tell you, if you are a fan of what we do, if you enjoy hanging out with us for a couple hours a week or seeing us in person, this is going to be an unbelievable year for us. Come hell or high water, I guarantee it's going to be huge. I have so many crazy plans for 2020. I could name five things right now that would make your pubic hair turn blue, but I'm not going to do it because I want you to wait and see as the year unfolds.
Starting point is 00:05:19 But I want to end this by just talking about the Glass Cannon podcast because we are, you know, I said it, I think, in the episode a couple weeks ago. We are, what would I say, how many Christmases have we celebrated here on the network? And I think it was five. We started in 2015. So we're going into our fifth year of this podcast and our fifth year of the show, which is absolutely bonkers. The story that we're trying to tell is over five years old. And I've said it to the guys and I've said it, you know, either tweeted about it or I've talked about it on the show as well. Like, this story has an end, and the end is in sight. I think that book five has been an interesting challenge for the group,
Starting point is 00:05:54 for the show, for the listeners who are caught up in listening from week to week. I think it probably, a lot of these episodes play a lot better to people who catch up and can burn through them all in one pace. But if you're listening to this from week to week, you're probably left wanting more. And it's a tough thing. It's really a tough thing, balancing wanting to replicate what a real gaming experience is, what
Starting point is 00:06:16 our gaming experience was. Trust me, it would be a lot more plotting if we weren't recording this. You know, trying to recreate that experience, trying to not push them and railroad them down one path just to keep things moving, while also knowing that there's a lot of people listening to this and I want to make this show the best it can be. Well, I can tell you, starting with this week's episode, everything is about to change. I see the end in sight. I see where this story is going.
Starting point is 00:06:46 I don't know all of it. A lot of it isn't really dependent on what I do. It's dependent on the choices they make up against the obstacles that I throw at them. And things change. My plans change along the way. But I can tell you everything is about to change. And it starts with this week's episode. And what a fitting end to the year.
Starting point is 00:07:03 Because we started, I looked this up right before I started recording this intro on episode 187 was the last episode of the year, Quest Side Story. And then the next one on January 1st, I believe, was Vorpal Rain. We were in Skirkotla's tomb. This was before the big battle where we lost some of our favorites. Hell, Forbears was probably still around at the end of last year. Or certainly, you know, his corpse was still fresh. But we are finishing the year now deep, deep within Ashpeak, deep within dragons' nests and rookeries. I can't wait to finish this story.
Starting point is 00:07:42 I'm in no rush to do it. I think we've got at least another year left. But it's important to me to finish this story. I'm in no rush to do it. I think we've got at least another year left. But it's important to me to finish this story and finish it with the same excitement and enthusiasm that we started it with, that same childlike wonder in our Halcyon Days of the Glass Cannon podcast. I want it to really be appointment television for everyone,
Starting point is 00:08:05 and I want our players to be as fired up about what is happening as I am, as the mastermind, as someone who can see where this may go. And so with that in mind, I just want you to sit back and enjoy the end of this. Because someday these characters aren't going to be around anymore. They'll be new characters that hopefully you love just as much or even more than your Lorks, your Barons, your Gormlees, and your Galabras. And I'm really excited for the next Glass Cannon podcast. I'm really excited for life after Giant Slayer. Because that is starting to take shape in my mind as well. But for now, this is the story we have. And there's a reason
Starting point is 00:08:52 all of you listen to it every week. And I want to make sure that we keep delivering to you the show that I know you love, the show that you fell in love with and brings you back from week to week. So without further ado, here's the last episode of 2019 as the road to the end begins. Episode 240 of the Glass Cannon Podcast. Till breath do us part. I cannot believe that it is the fifth time that I'll have said this, what I'm about to say on this show. I cannot believe
Starting point is 00:09:29 that I've said this four times already and I'm about to say it for the fifth time. It is the last episode of the year. Wow. Can you believe this is the fifth time we've put out a final show of the year for this show?
Starting point is 00:09:47 That's insane. I thought you meant he said it four times by mistake. And on this, this is the final episode of the year. I'm sorry about the other four times. I miscounted. He said it four times since April of 2019. He's like, stop saying it. Middle of July, I said it a few times.
Starting point is 00:10:04 I remember. 2019. Stop saying it. Middle of July, I said it a few times. I remember. Would you like to hear the three things I thought were contenders for things you've only ever said five times on the show? Part of me doesn't want to hear it, but go ahead. Have your moment. I was thinking maybe I'm sorry,
Starting point is 00:10:16 but it would be fine. That was number one. I knew these would all be dicks. Some variation on I'm sorry, I apologize. It's my fault. It's my fault was number two. I'm sorry. I apologize. It's my fault. It's my fault was number two. I was wrong. What's number three? I love you guys.
Starting point is 00:10:32 Oh. No, but I've said that. You've said that about four times in four or five times. Oh, yeah. He does drink after all. He's never believed it. I love you guys. Crazy.
Starting point is 00:10:44 And what do you think? For a giant slayer, one more time around the sun? We'll do it next year? I would love to go one more time around the sun. Let's see how it happens. Let's see where the chips lay where they may. But I'd love to go one more time around the sun with this crazy podcast. I can't believe your stupid character lasted for all of those.
Starting point is 00:11:03 Oh, yeah. Spoiler alert. New listeners at episode 40 or whatever. So you think this show is going to go until 2021? Is that the deal? I think, but I don't know. I don't think so. You don't think so?
Starting point is 00:11:17 You think it ends this year? I do. A lot of people say, well, I shouldn't say a lot of people, but I have heard. People are out there saying. That things can progress pretty quickly. Even for a show like us that, you know, we some shows some drag some go we screw around we have a good time we have a lot of fun we have fun playing the game yeah some people don't like that they're not into fun i don't care i don't want them having fun uh i'm a nice even five i like it nice even five years you want to end by june of this year i'm just saying
Starting point is 00:11:44 five and a little change Five is a change Who's counting but Let me ask you a question Yeah Let's say Okay You can see the end in sight
Starting point is 00:11:50 For like December of 2020 Wouldn't that be nice? Do you say You know what I'm going to wrap it up By 2020 Or do you say I'm going to pad it a little
Starting point is 00:12:00 Just to get to January of 2021 I wouldn't do that I just don't know it's not really do any shows have their christmas special as their series finale has that ever happened all british shows yeah it's like a doctor who thing or something down abby i think their season finale was a christmas well no they're they're separate they're separate things they usually wrap up some major storylines yeah yeah or yeah, the original Office had a Christmas special that wrapped it up. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:29 Well, I don't know. Who knows? But the end is inside. I mean, I sent out a couple emails just in the past couple days to some people sitting at this very table. Well, this is why I think it's over. Because they're ending in 2020. they're ending in 2020 because uh you have brought you've said this so much in the last three months that like it's really on your mind and as you're in the gm chair you know more than we know so i'm like you're kind of hinting here that things are about to start snowballing fast
Starting point is 00:12:58 that's that's what i'm hearing yeah i mean we'll see how fast the snowball goes down the hill. But I mean, the end is nigh. The end is in sight. How we arrived there, who knows? But this is it. Last one of the year. You guys ready for 2021? It's been a hell of a year. Hell of a year for the company.
Starting point is 00:13:17 Hell of a year for the niche. What happened in 2020? What happens next year? You said, are you guys ready for 2021? Oh. I'm barely ready for 2020. Can I say that? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:25 Well, let's deal with 2020 first. Let's deal with the year in front of us, Troy. I can't help but look ahead. Looking ahead. He's always imagining our one-year plan. This was a big year. All his life as he looked away to the future. Never his mind on where he was.
Starting point is 00:13:42 What he was doing. Never his mind on where he was, what he was doing. I feel like 2019 was big for everybody at this table, both with the business and then with our own lives in many different ways. I don't want to speak for anybody, but that's just the gist I get from spending time with you guys. And I think this next year is going to be huge for all of us in the same ways. Yeah. You bought a house in 2019. I bought a house. I closed
Starting point is 00:14:07 on it yesterday in real time. Congratulations. Big move. Very exciting, yes. It feels real. I was lamenting the fact that my left eye has been twitching for the past three weeks and I thought after the closing it would stop.
Starting point is 00:14:24 No, no, it's still going. As I pointed out, you did just spend more money on something, more money than you've ever spent on anything before in your entire life. It's true. Probably combined. That's probably accurate. And from what I understand, it certainly isn't going to slow down the stress in any way.
Starting point is 00:14:41 Now, owning a home. It's only going to escalate. And if you ever move you'll spend you'll probably like ideally you'll spend even more money than you've ever spent on anything in your entire life there's a lot of money moving around right now my bank account looked like one thing and then in a day it looked completely different all you had to show for it was this house oh there's the right eye. They're both going now. Well, I'm excited.
Starting point is 00:15:07 Are you guys excited? Yeah. For your house? I can't wait to see it. Yeah, we'll have a party, wouldn't you say? A little housewarming party. But I'm talking about, like, for the future. Yeah. The future of life or the future of Giantsland?
Starting point is 00:15:18 Future of us. Or future of your eyes. I'm also concerned about that. I'm asking a very open-ended question. Yeah. You need to be more specific. Are you just excited? Are you... Yes. Are we optimistic about the future? eyes. I'm also concerned about that. I'm asking a very open-ended question. Yeah. You need to be more specific. Are you just excited? Are you...
Starting point is 00:15:26 Yes. Are we optimistic about the future? Yes. I am. That's good. A lot of people aren't. Really? Yes.
Starting point is 00:15:32 Why? Because the world's a horrible place? The world can be a very horrible place. The world is literally going up in flames. Yes. Quite literally in a lot of places. But that's why I think that what we do is important. Because even if we have an episode like, ah, that was lame, we're still providing a way to escape whatever might be troubling.
Starting point is 00:15:49 A few moments of respite for any weary traveler along the roads of life. Every week we get emails, we get letters from people who tell us like how important our show is to us. And I think sometimes we get stressed out as evidenced by my eye About all the work that goes into this and Sometimes it not being received as well as we'd Like it but it's very I think we're Doing important stuff and so Thank you to all those people by the way there's Such nice emails and comments
Starting point is 00:16:15 And they're so special to Us it's just hard to you know Get back to everybody but you know we read Them and we love them and it keeps us going Well and all this all the stress in the world and everything, I realized something in our current, you know, we're close to an election year. I realized that I'll turn 35 just in time to take the presidency. So part of my platform as Burger 2020 is bringing back Quaaludes
Starting point is 00:16:40 so you can get that twitch out of your eye. Finally. They're back. They're going to be, like, next to to certs and Mentos at the store. I'll tell you what. And you just pick them up. I've heard worse platforms. I've heard a lot of people running for local office on platforms.
Starting point is 00:16:55 Not quite so serious as that. Might want to keep an eye on where that Patreon money is being funneled. Actually, I think Andrew Yang, that might actually be in his platform. Could be, could be. Well, with all the stress in the world, let's add to your stress as players. Oh, man. For where we are in this adventure. I mean, I think, I don't know, we'll see how the episode goes, but what a way to end the
Starting point is 00:17:19 year, I think. This is going to be a humdinger. Yeah, I was more than happy to continue the banter for as long as you'd like. I could tell. Because I'm irritated by whatever's happening here, and I know that it's going to be brutal. Yeah, it's, you know, you obviously, how could it be more brutal than fighting, what, five, six dragons? No, one, two, three, four, five dragons. I still see the bodies dead on roll 20.
Starting point is 00:17:43 And a couple of fire giants, which now are like children's playthings to you. But five dragons. I still see the bodies dead on roll 20. And a couple of fire giants, which now are like children's playthings to you. But five dragons. Five young red dragons. How far we've come. How far we've come. We kind of walked through here a little bit brazenly. It's not that we weren't somewhat careful. But we did think that we had knocked out the biggest possible threat in this area.
Starting point is 00:18:02 At least I did. And I wasn't too concerned i'm i one of the things i'm concerned about honestly is where metro's at uh spell wise i don't think you use too many but you definitely use some stuff and now we're getting into some sort of horrifying horrifying combat what do you think are you okay are you going into this confidently? I mean, I'm not. I'm not. Not running on full. Okay. Running on full. Oh, good for you here.
Starting point is 00:18:31 It doesn't have the same ring. Running on full. Going, running on. Don't need to stop. Running on full. Running on. Driving right past the shell. Driving right past the shell driving right past the shell is that jackson brown
Starting point is 00:18:53 oh man it'd be really easy to rewrite that song with all the opposite words lyrics everything opposite lyrics The lyrics are like, running blind, like running... Sighted. Seeing everything. Running into the sun, running into the moon. I can see really well. Gotta do what you can just to keep your love alive. That one's easy.
Starting point is 00:19:22 Gotta do what you can just to kill somebody. Kill your love. Just to keep your love alive. That one's easy. Gotta do what you can just to kill somebody. Kill your love. Just to kill your love. Wait, this one lyric says, in 69, I was 21. Yeah. In 21, I was 69. Sit in the front seat, whatever you have.
Starting point is 00:19:41 God, we're having fun already. Enjoy it. Oh, I'm so happy. The worst part is Baron only has three bullets left. I don't know if you guys understood that. Baron is down to three bullets and has used all 17 of his judgments for the day. He's lying, but I have 13 judgments left. 13?
Starting point is 00:20:01 Still good, and I think I'm going to apply four at the same time, Troy. I think that's how the rules work what is your current bullet count what's the exact number exactly i think it's 117 but i'd have to check baron's bullets no because i spent about 600 last time we had a little rest so i added 100 to what was left of my last 125 okay hi so you have plenty of bullets uh i think you did burn one judgment in the dragon fight um i believe i did too yeah i have i have two judgments left right now my grits it uh full according to my sheet okay i am four dragons i am four i only have eight rounds of bane left um so okay you're gonna need that for whatever i mean i have it i mean what's crazy about this
Starting point is 00:20:44 dungeon though It's like a zoo With no like Cages in between the animals It's just like The cougars And the lions And the bears
Starting point is 00:20:51 All just get to like Fight for primacy Yeah It's like You got dragons in one place Guarded by fire giants In this pit of Like lava
Starting point is 00:20:59 Next to a treasure And it's just Whatever the hell Is gonna come out of here Is gonna kill us It's the Hunger Games Monster Edition. Well, let's just see what happens here. Why don't we have everybody roll for initiative?
Starting point is 00:21:10 Rolling for initiative! Just like we used to do back in the day. Oh, no. Oh, no. Let's start with Metronarn. 19. 19 for Metronarn. We. 19 for Metronarn. We got a 20 for Thune.
Starting point is 00:21:28 Not too shabby. Baron. 16. Natural 1. Oh, no. Bad start for the Baron. Not particularly great. Dalgrith.
Starting point is 00:21:38 29. 29 for Dalgrith. Very good. And Jimmer. I also got a 16. I had a natural 11 Natural 11 Alright I'm assuming Baron's got the jump on you
Starting point is 00:21:52 There Closer to 100 by the way So I'll figure it out I'll make sure it's right in the new year That's my new year's resolution If you shoot over 100 bullets in this episode I think we're good though for this episode This is a real long episode
Starting point is 00:22:03 Yeah Unless you switch to like an auto rifle Have like a mini gun Where did Baron get a Cadillac? in this episode. I think we're good, though, for this episode. This is a real long episode. Yeah. Unless you switch to like an auto-write. Have like a minigun. Where did Baron get a Cadillac? I really want Red Dead Redemption 2 style Deadeye
Starting point is 00:22:12 with a repeater. Just ch-ching-ching. Oh, that's the best. The best. Well, let's start out with what's going to happen here first. I believe I ended
Starting point is 00:22:22 last week by saying there was a blaze of fire that covers the entire party. Everybody roll a reflex save. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, yes! Yes!
Starting point is 00:22:36 Oh, dear. I'm not feeling lucky. I feel unlucky. Oh, I wore out all my luck! I knew it! Thun failed. Let's start with Dalgrith. 21. Okay, that's a fail. Shit, I knew I wore out all my luck.
Starting point is 00:22:54 Metra. 27. You are okay. Baron. 32. Back in the fast lane, baby. You are okay as well. And Jimmer.
Starting point is 00:23:02 Natural 20 for Jimmer. Oh, automatic pass on the save. Good start. So, those of you who passed take 32 points of fire damage. Those of you who failed take 64 points of fire damage. Oh, my God. Wow. Not a bad fail.
Starting point is 00:23:19 I have protection from energy communal marked on my sheet as active. Well, protection from energy commutal marked on my sheet is active. Yes. All of you have 120 points of a pool, basically, of fire damage you can take. Once that pool is gone, you start taking the fire damage. So luckily you cast that, much to my chagrin behind the screen. I was like, damn it, why did you fucking cast that? So you're going to eat that. It's going to start eating into that 120.
Starting point is 00:23:45 However, Thun now and Dalgreath are down to 56 points. So fucking lame. One save. And I did say some things jumped out next to the party. How do I describe these creatures? Glowing hot plates of iron. All right. Covering the head of this immense primordial
Starting point is 00:24:06 lungfish as lava spills from between its jagged teeth. Two of them pop up next to the party. Let's just throw them on the old maparoo here. They are surrounding you,
Starting point is 00:24:23 but as far as you know They had nothing to do with the Horrible Gout of Flame Do we see anything? The Gout of Flame ravages us Then is there anything Where it came from? I'm assuming we were like The flame dissipates and you see
Starting point is 00:24:39 Nothing However these creatures go to bite Metra And Th However, these creatures go to bite. Metra and Thun. And these, okay, and these creatures are, they rolled higher than 29 and ish? They. Because I just, I remember having like, we rolled perception and we rolled super high. So I'm just curious if we. Yeah, you rolled like in the 30s.
Starting point is 00:25:00 Yeah, I'm just curious if we beat it for a sneak attack or whatever. Surprise round. Right, right, right. You know what I'm going to have? I'm going to have them emerging as their surprise then. And we'll move right into round one. It is Dalgoth's turn. All right.
Starting point is 00:25:14 First, I'm going to do a knowledge check on these things. Okay. What would it be? Well, what do you want it to be? I'm going to say Arcana. Okay. Come on! Oh, God, I hate shitty knowledge rolls. Sounded good
Starting point is 00:25:30 from here. 15. I hate, hate, hate the shitty knowledge rolls. I'd rather roll a natural fumble on every attack than shitty knowledge rolls. How about we do a house rule? You can re-roll a knowledge check, but it's a standard action. That is not a bad rule.
Starting point is 00:25:48 I'm kidding. That's not a bad rule at all. How about house rule? If Joe pounds the table hard enough to change it to a natural 20. We all do a shot. I'm going to keep going. You have no idea. For Dalgrith, he's seen a lot of monsters.
Starting point is 00:26:02 He's like the witcher. Never fought anything like this. All right. And it is, what does it look like? Does it look like it's made of iron? Here, that's the actual pawn. Let me expand it so you can get a real good view of this thing. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:26:16 Does it look like it has flesh? It looks metal. There might be some flesh underneath the hard carapace, but it's really hard to tell the smoke and fire spilling out of it. And it's large. Yes, it is a large creature. Both of them are. All right.
Starting point is 00:26:31 Dog Wraiths is just going to go full nutso mode, and he's going to run and jump on this thing. Okay. Oh, man. So he's just like, ah! He just runs up because he doesn't know if it's going to burn him. Better break out the oven mitts, cousin! These things look rather fish-like. They have a fishness
Starting point is 00:26:48 to them, yes. Like lungfish. Are they coming out of the ground, or are they slithering? They burst out. There's no legs. They might have vestigial legs. They look to be very, very small. Maybe just their fins.
Starting point is 00:27:03 You can't quite tell if the fins are what they use, like mudskippers. It's hard to tell. Right now they're just... Ugh, gross. They look like that sad fish, if you Google the... You know the sad fish? I don't know the sad fish. I don't know the...
Starting point is 00:27:17 Oh, yeah, I think I know what you're talking about. The blobfish? Yeah, the blobfish. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, the one that looks like Ted Cruz. All right, so that's a 41 against their CMD. All right, so you step up to it. It hasn't acted in the round, but it was active when it burst out,
Starting point is 00:27:36 so I don't think it'll take an... Does it get the attack of opportunity? Well, you would roll to just avoid it, right? Yeah. I'm trying to think if it gets the attack of opportunity. It hasn't acted in the round, so I'm going to say no. Okay. That's a big choice because, you know, he jumps up, gets on it,
Starting point is 00:27:53 and then if he attacks it and hits it, he'll get sneak attack damage if it's by the book. Or if it was a surprise. The problem with the surprise round that I have is, like, we should get a surprise round if we saw it. You know what I mean? Right. If you don't want to do that, that's fine. But then you kind of either
Starting point is 00:28:07 have to have the sneak attack and the attack of opportunity or neither. Well, basically the way I played it is like you heard the ground moving and they jumped out. But rather than being able to get an attack, we just started the round. But basically they're not unaware of you.
Starting point is 00:28:23 No, no, but I just mean like, you know, you roll first, you roll highest initiative even if they're aware of you and you attack them before they go. I'm going to say you get the sneak attack. Okay, great.
Starting point is 00:28:31 So I'm going to try one step. Yeah, try one step. Did you get atop it? Yeah. Well, 41 against CMD. Yeah, you're fine. So he just rubs on, grapples on
Starting point is 00:28:41 and then tries to stab it with a short sword and that's a 33 to hit. 33 to hit is a hit. Nice. Okay. And then is it evil? I suppose I can tell you that. No. Okay. Didn't think so.
Starting point is 00:28:58 Is it subject to critical to sneak attack damage? As far as you know. Okay. Great. Just give me the damage difference. So that's 29 if it is subject to it, and if it's not, it would be 11. 29 versus 11. Wow. Okay.
Starting point is 00:29:16 It's a big difference. It certainly looks like you heard it, and you are atop it, yes? Atop it, yeah. Okay. And that's it. He runs, jumps on, and stabs. It is Thun's turn. Thun is right next to Dalgrith,
Starting point is 00:29:32 so Thun will take a five-foot step and go full attack on these things here with his plus one frost-wounding battle axe. Ooh! First attack, natural 20. Oh! Yeah! Nice.
Starting point is 00:29:44 There you go, Thune. Nice. Let's see if Thune confirms. Thune confirms. That is a good firm. Wow. Thune's feeling it here. He's got to be vulnerable to the frost, too.
Starting point is 00:29:56 That's awesome. Yeah, so Thune just comes down, boom, with the frost-wounding Battleaxe, and it's a named character. So what do you got, Joe? And it also is, okay, so it gets complicated. Alright, so it is subject to crits, as far as what you're saying right now. Yes. And he gets sneak attack damage, don't forget, as well.
Starting point is 00:30:14 But that's not doubled on a crit, so that's separate. Alright, Aaron from San Diego. Hi, Aaron. What makes the grass grow green? Oh, dear. Okay. Blood! Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:27 Your attack bursts arteries in the target, and it begins to bleed out. Oh, wow. Double damage plus 1d8 bleed. Wow. 1d8. The target is sickened by the sight of its own blood spraying across the ground. The target also gains the sickened condition. Fortitude save negates sickened.
Starting point is 00:30:45 On a failure, the Sickened condition lasts until the bleed damage is stopped. Okay. Succeeded on the Fortitude save against Thune's AC, right? No, against Confirmed roll. Failed, actually. Nice. So he's going to be Sickened, and he takes 1d8 bleed on his turn. And Thune's
Starting point is 00:31:01 Wounding Battleaxe already does 1 bleed. So it's 1d 28 plus one! Wow! Now let me ask you this. Is it just double damage? Yeah, just double damage. Don't forget it's a battle axe, so that's triple damage. Yeah, the battle axe is triple, yeah. So I roll and triple or I roll three times? Three times. You roll
Starting point is 00:31:17 three times, add it up, you keep out the sneak attack die, and then just add those at the end. Triple that strength bonus. 14 plus 24. 38. 38. Plus 2d6. Plus 1d6 cold.
Starting point is 00:31:33 Oh, God. Which is going to be plus 1 and a half. I got it. Plus, and then the bleed comes later. Bleed comes on its turn, yeah. All right. So it is going to be a total of 45 points of damage. All right, Thune!
Starting point is 00:31:48 Nice. Thune is the best, man. Nice. That was pretty good, and he's still got one more attack. Thank you, Aaron. Well done. Thune! All right, obviously a much lower chance to hit, and natural two.
Starting point is 00:31:59 He misses on the second attack, but not without doing a nice little crit there. Don't forget about the bleed damage, because I certainly will. I certainly will not! It is Metra's turn. Metra, you are about... Sorry, sorry. That's the Metra music. Metra, you're about ten feet away from one of these things.
Starting point is 00:32:15 On the other side, Dalgrith and Thuim seem to be handling that creature. What do you want to do? Metra will take a five-foot step to get away from it okay uh get out of its get out of its reach hopefully smart uh and then she will level her finger at it and uh she's gonna cast disintegrate that is oh oh okay that is a pretty uh pretty i is a pretty good spell. What kind of save are we talking here? Well, first I got to hit you. That is a 23 against touch.
Starting point is 00:32:51 That is a hit. There you go. Gotcha! Fortitude save. Okay. He almost passed the other fortitude save. Natural 20 on the fortitude save. All right.
Starting point is 00:33:00 Can I tell you, by the way? Twice I've seen the GCP. The flurry of activity of criticism on how I decided to treat target of opportunity by not taking a shot when Metra hits a ranged touch attack with her ray. So many people arguing. And when I argued back, it didn't seem right because of flavor. Because it says you and your allies pelt your enemies with the deadly barrage of missiles. It didn't feel like a missile like I think of a missile. So that's why I get myself.
Starting point is 00:33:24 And they said, oh, givingimping your character for flavor. What are you, Joe O'Brien? It was a deep cut, dude. That's cold. So low. That's cold and Joe's vulnerable. Tell that person. I said, shut up.
Starting point is 00:33:37 You got them. They probably listened. That is 19 points of damage. 19 points of damage. And that is a death effect or? It is a transm of damage. 19 points of damage. And that is a death effect, or? It is a transmutation effect. Okay. It's a spell, right?
Starting point is 00:33:50 It's a spell. Okay. Great. 19 points of... And can I roll a knowledge check? Yeah. Come on, hit it. Knowledge Arcana.
Starting point is 00:33:58 Hit it, Mietra. 25. Yeah, I can let you know. There we go. These are creatures known as pyropices. Pyropices? Yes. Useful.
Starting point is 00:34:09 Useful information. Not interesting. Useful. Okay. What type of creature are they? If they hit, they have a free chance to grab. Oh, gosh. And they have the ability to sprint.
Starting point is 00:34:27 Sprint. Sprint across, on top of land, not underneath. Right. They have a, you know, they can make their speed go up to four times once every minute. How? Okay. Useful. Very useful.
Starting point is 00:34:43 What are they going to do here? Useful and terrifying. Drag me into the lava is What are they going to do here? Useful and terrifying. Drag me into the lava is what they're going to do. Yeah. At that moment. If they grab. At that moment, that isn't what in fact they do. The creature has you on its back.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Oh. So it sprints into the lava with you. Oh, no. No. Okay. And I sprints into the lava with you. Oh, no. No. Okay. And I'm not going to let go. As a free action. Because that would make sense.
Starting point is 00:35:15 Right. Can you take a free action not on your turn? Yes. That's what free actions are. You can take a free action anytime. Anytime. Anytime. I think you can't take a free action when it's not your turn.
Starting point is 00:35:26 Only reason I think that is I'm looking at this thing. It says, for example, a free action like speak. In general, speaking is a free action that you can perform even when it isn't your turn, which makes me think that other free actions you can't take when it isn't your turn. Well, it makes me think that anything that's easier than speaking... You can perform one or more free actions while taking another action normally. These two phrases imply
Starting point is 00:35:52 that normal free actions are only taken on your turn unless the particular action states otherwise. Now... It says you cannot use a free action during another creature's turn. Speaking is an exception. Page 144. Players handle it. And now I understand what you're not use a free action during another creature's turn speaking is an exception one page 144 players handbook and now I understand what you're
Starting point is 00:36:08 saying you're gonna have to make up some nonsense for this to be real like like his hand is stuck in the creature that's what it like you otherwise I'm not gonna be like let's ride this out yeah I'm riding on full baby right well you're on top of it and it's just running so you would try
Starting point is 00:36:24 and jump off of it letting go I like are you saying you're you're hanging on of it and it's just running so you would try and jump off of it letting go i like are you saying you're you're hanging on the creature this is where it gets complicated because i'm hanging on the creature flavor wise you're hanging on the creature if it's going to run and dive into the lava i think he would let go right yeah right but uh i am not going to be uh pissed off either way I just think that it, for me, it breaks immersion a little bit. I hear you. I hear you. Well, here's what I'm going to do.
Starting point is 00:36:50 I'm going to just bite you instead. I'm going to try and bite. Still going to have a great chance. See what happens. And then, you know, this is big time stuff, so I don't want to fuck around just in case. That is going to be... A hit. Not necessarily.
Starting point is 00:37:08 33. Yeah, that's a hit. Brutal. Let me get a couple of D8s. I should have had a D8. Am I right, guys? All right, that is 21 points of damage, All right, that is 21 points of damage, plus I need you to roll a reflex save to see if you catch fire.
Starting point is 00:37:32 Okay. I'm sure you'll nail this. Oh, God, another same thing. Natural five, 21. 21, you're okay. You don't catch fire. However, now it attempts to grab you with its jaws. Okay.
Starting point is 00:37:50 That is going to be very, very tight. That is going to be... I don't think I'm going to get you. 29? Probably not. No. 29. Yeah. So you do not...
Starting point is 00:37:58 Oh, God. I just had a heart attack. You do not get grabbed. I mean, is that instant death? Instant lava? There's a lot of different things that could happen. It's not good. My guess is like a 10d6 per round sort of thing would be my guess.
Starting point is 00:38:12 So you just take the damage, you don't catch fire, and it does not sink its teeth into you. And probably difficult terrain to get out of that lava, so you might need several rounds to live. Or you have to swim in it. Would it become underwater combat? It's not good!
Starting point is 00:38:29 The other thing to keep in mind is that Dalgrit specifically is a CMD expert. He's more... has more advantage in this position than I bet anybody in the party. Yeah, he's like a jujitsu... Exactly. Of letting go of things.
Starting point is 00:38:46 Right, but he can't let go! His specialty is letting go. Right. Yeah, it's Oh my god. You're alright? Awesome. The other one is only within range of let me zoom in here
Starting point is 00:39:01 Jimmer, because Metro stepped out of the way, so we will attempt here. Jimmer, because Metra stepped out of the way. So we will attempt to bite Jimmer. 34. That is a hit. Oh, boy. Let's get the D8s out. 20 points of damage.
Starting point is 00:39:18 Roll a reflex save. Okay. That is a 24 reflex. Okay Okay you do not catch fire And now the attempt to grab Okay Oh god Another shit shit roll Uh 27 against
Starting point is 00:39:39 No that is a failure Wow That's a shit roll. I'm not as confident as I was. He just one moment ago. I'm going to quote Joe. Dog Wreath is a CMD expert. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:54 All I'm saying is I've never had a character with CMD this high. I felt confident until that. And then it just inches forward to be within range of Metra, Baron, and Jimmer. All right. Moving right along in Funtown here. forward to be within range of Metra, Baron, and Jimmer. Alright. Moving right along in Funtown here. Funtown. Population? Us.
Starting point is 00:40:13 Us. At that moment, a wall of fire forms. Oh, come on. On Baron and Jimmer's spot. And it is a circle of fire that will loop around Baron and Jimmer, cutting Metra off from the rest of the party.
Starting point is 00:40:46 Ooh. So, let's talk Wall of Fire. Oh, dear. Which side? Which side am I on? Sure. You're on the good side. Stay on my good side.
Starting point is 00:40:58 That's great news. Set the Wall of Fire to you. All right, so you, Baron and Jimmer, are effectively in the blaze So You guys are going to take Immediate damage Let me just see if you get a reflex save
Starting point is 00:41:12 No, no reflex save So you're both going to take 16 points of fire damage Which obviously is just going to eat into your Bippity bop And then Metra You're going to take, actually, you're all going to take
Starting point is 00:41:29 an extra 2d4 points of damage. Oh, God. I can't pick up a d4. I need a special hand to pick up a d4. We got those 12-sided D4s. Oh, that's right, D4s. I have it in my pile of dice here. All right, so on one side of the wall,
Starting point is 00:41:52 selected by you, sends forth waves of heat. So actually... Thank you to Katie and Eric for those 12-sided D4s. Yes, thank you, guys. Dealing 2D4 points of fire damage to creatures within 10 feet and 1D4 to those past. The wall deals damage when it appears into all creatures in the area on your turn each round.
Starting point is 00:42:08 In addition, it deals damage to any creature passing through it, or those who are there when the wall appears. So I will choose just everybody but Metra to take another 5 points of fire damage.
Starting point is 00:42:26 And now let me just get this stupid thing on here. Okay, there it is. Now you can see, and actually, looking at this, Thun and Dalgrith are only going to take one D4 because you're not as close to it as Baron and Jimmer. So instead of taking, what did I say, five points of damage,
Starting point is 00:42:44 you and Thun will take two, but you're already down to, I think you were, what, down to 56 left? What was the first one? What was the first hit? I didn't get it. The first hit left you with 56, so you were down 64.
Starting point is 00:42:55 64, okay. So now, yeah. Now we're down to 66. Yeah, 66. So there is a full-on ring of fire holding everybody but me in with one of the pyropisees, and I am on the outside with the other. What you just described is exactly correct.
Starting point is 00:43:12 So now we can't see Metro, Metro can't see us. How tall are the ceilings in this space? 300 feet. No, they are 40 feet, I believe. Let's say 40 feet. So there is space above the wall. There is space above the wall. Yeah, the wall is 20 feet high,
Starting point is 00:43:28 but there's 20 feet between that and the head of the ceiling. Oh, this is so horrifying, this image. I'm like, on this creature, and it's just like... Like all around the area, just a circle of fire. All right.
Starting point is 00:43:43 That is what happened. They attack Dalgrith and Jimmer. They bite, but they do not grab. And then a wall of fire appears, cutting Metra off from the rest of the party and burning through Baron and Jimmer's heat protection. Moving right along, it is Baron's turn. Based off of the knowledge that Metra gleaned From her successful knowledge check
Starting point is 00:44:08 Do I know the creature type that we are facing With the Pyropisees Being thrown at me You just know You would know that it's a magical beast For the purposes of Bane Would I be able to apply that to my weapon? I don't know if you can do Bane magical beast
Starting point is 00:44:23 I honestly just don't know I just need't know. I just need to know the creature type. You need to know the subtype. The subtype. Yeah. Looking here, a Bane weapon excels against certain foes. You only have to pick subtypes.
Starting point is 00:44:37 At least this is how it works for a weapon against humanoids and outsiders. But Magical Beast looks like a catch-all. As if it works like you're making a Bane weapon, I think you're good, buddy. Yeah, so Baron's going to shield his eye from the fires that are surrounding him. And he's going to go, shit, I'm not ready for a fish fry. And he's going to step even further into the radius. Because he feels bad about how Thun has been treated throughout this adventure. Yeah. And he's going to use.
Starting point is 00:44:59 By you, mainly. Yes, by. Mostly by me. Go directly into battle, Thun. Kill. And he's going to rapid shot at this thing through his friends. Going to look for a weak spot on this thing. Okay.
Starting point is 00:45:11 Don't hit Thune, Grant. Don't hit Thune! Oh! 20 to hit. 22 to hit. That is a hit. All right. All right, dude.
Starting point is 00:45:21 Here we go. Five foot step. Ooh. 33 points of damage. Okay. Oh, dude. Here we go. Five foot step. Ooh. 33 points of damage. Okay. Oh, man. Not too bad. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:45:32 Second attack. Here it comes. And wait, this is regular Bane. Not greater Bane. Right. I would have rolled 4d6 for that. And this is the one that I am on. Yes.
Starting point is 00:45:42 Okay. So I'm, like, shooting in between your legs. It's trying to bring me into the lava. Next attack is a hit as well. Of course it is. Every day. All day. Every day.
Starting point is 00:45:53 All day. We call them all day burger. 26 points of damage. 26 points of damage. Okay. Still kicking. Third attack is a 19 to hit. Yep.
Starting point is 00:46:03 You're all right. All right. Unless it's no longer against Touch AC. 20 points of damage on that one. Okay. Not looking good. The final attack. You know what?
Starting point is 00:46:12 Let's spend a grip point. Let's get up close and deadly. Yeah, up close and deadly. Oh, that is a 13 against Touch. Now, it has cover there. You tell me. Is that going to be a plus four or a plus two Joe? Plus two I would think Then that is a hit
Starting point is 00:46:30 Alright here we go with the damage Ten, twelve, thirteen Thirty one points of damage And it's dead Yes One down Nice dude Finally got to use that profession, fisherman.
Starting point is 00:46:47 Finally. Hey. I was thinking about that, but I forgot about it by the time my turn came around. Thank you, Skip, for keeping me honest. Oh, I mean, missing on those two bites. Absolutely huge. It allowed Baron to sneak in there and get a kill. Jimmer, you're up.
Starting point is 00:47:03 This thing, it tried to bite you. It sunk its teeth in, couldn't quite take a hold, and then a kill. Jimmer, you're up. This thing, it tried to bite you. It sunk its teeth in, couldn't quite take a hold, and then a wall of fire appeared around you. Okay. On you. Yes. So Jimmer is going to take, he's going to sidestep, still in the wall of fire,
Starting point is 00:47:16 but has a little bit of a clearer view of this Pyro Pisces standing outside of it. Yes. And he's going to do a full attack. Smart. On it. Yes. And he's going to do a full attack. Smart. On it. First attack. That is, that's a natural six. That is 30 to hit.
Starting point is 00:47:33 That is very much a hit. And that is 31 points of damage. Okay. Second attack. Ooh. That is 27 to hit. That's a hit as well. Oh, Jimmer. Beautiful. Ooh. That is 27 to hit. That's a hit as well. Oh, Jimmer.
Starting point is 00:47:47 Beautiful. Beautiful. And that is 25 points of damage. Okay. Final attack. 90-15. That is a 29 to hit. You're all right, LaRusso.
Starting point is 00:47:59 And that is another 30 points of damage. Okay. Jimmer steps up still in that line of fire, as it were, and deals massive damage to this creature. What a badass. It is in very bad shape. It's a new round. It's Dalgorth's turn.
Starting point is 00:48:14 Dalgorth, you are atop this pyropise right before Baron cut it down. It falls, and you slide gently off its back and land nimbly on your feet. What do you do now? Finish this thing off! He's about to come at me! Uh, yeah, hearing Jimmer screaming, fighting through the wall of fire.
Starting point is 00:48:34 So badass. Uh, Dalgrath is going to... Horrifying. I mean, what else is he going to do? He's a hero, right? Also, you're immune to the fire for right now. No, he's not immune. Everything ticks away, dude.
Starting point is 00:48:52 Everything has a cost. But how badass would it be for you to just walk through a curtain of flame unscathed? Yeah. Well, he's not going to walk through. He's going to run. Like bad boys style. He's going to run through. But I want to get all the way through.
Starting point is 00:49:03 That's the problem. All right. So he's going to click his heels. He's going to haste it up. Nice. Then he's going to run through. But I want to get all the way through. That's the problem. All right. So he's going to click his heels. He's going to haste it up. Nice. Then he's going to move. And get out of the wall of fire. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:15 Right next to Metro. Also doing an acrobatics check to avoid an attack of opportunity. Yes. And that will result in a 45. Yes! Wow. You're fine. God, that would have been a great fail right there.
Starting point is 00:49:30 Fight grab. So what's the fire damage? I think it's 3d6. It's 2d6 plus the caster level. Oh, right. So you're going to take 19 points of fire damage. And what was the caster level? Don't worry about that.
Starting point is 00:49:43 What was the caster, John? You almost got me, buddy! You gotta wake up pretty early in the morning if you wanna have a bad day! He does wake up really early. Alright, then I'm gonna do a climb check. Not early enough.
Starting point is 00:49:58 Against CMD. And that is a 42. Yeah. 42 against CMD. That gets you atop this beast. And then I'm going to stab it. This best. With my holy short sword.
Starting point is 00:50:14 And you said it wasn't worth it. Holy short sword. Not too long in the midnight sun. That is a 27 to hit. Every time Dalgrith jumps on a larger creature, I want Genuine's pony to start playing. He jumps on, gets onto it, stabs it, makes a connection. Ten points of damage. Ten points of damage.
Starting point is 00:50:33 Okay, not great, not bad. Yeah, at least he's on it now. He can start, you know, Jimmer can flank in a five-foot step, which is nice. Right, it is Thune's turn. Thune is still in that circle now. Obviously, he saw Dalgrith go rushing through there. I don't know what he's... He's not able to see through it, but I'm sure he has some memory of what it looked like. So I think Thun is just going to hold for now.
Starting point is 00:51:00 There's really no reason for him to rush through there. So it is Metra's turn. Metra, you are on that other side with Dalgrith. You see Jimmer basically standing between two sides of the wall, being immolated. But you know that you protected him before you came into this battle. What do you want to do? Well, Metra is now more concerned with the fact that a relatively high-level spell was just cast on us, in addition to the Curtain of Flame that dumped on us before the combat even started. Yes. So Metro is now
Starting point is 00:51:30 a little more concerned with the additional combatant that is probably in the room. Is there any check I can roll to identify the source of the spell, of that wall of fire? I know I can do spellcraft to identify it, but it's a wall made of fire, so that seems a little beside the point.
Starting point is 00:51:46 Identifying the source, that's going to be tough. I mean, you can try to identify the spell. I mean, I know what the spell is. She's a high-level sorcerer, and the wall is made of fire. Now, let's just look into wall of fire real quick. You know that there's a lot of
Starting point is 00:52:01 different classes. This is some low-key shade throw, by the way. We can't go past that. You probably feel pretty confident that it is a Bloodrager. Because it is a 4th level Bloodrager spell. Wow. Or an Unchained Summoner. It's 100% Unchained Summoner Giant.
Starting point is 00:52:19 Or Bloodrager. It's a 5th level invisible druid spell. Both can cast Wall of Fire. No, you know it's not a druid. It's definitely a blood rager or an unchained summoner in this pre-written AP. You can smell a druid a league away. All right. Just throwing out a bucket of druid chum right into the water. That'll get them to just wait five minutes.
Starting point is 00:52:43 They can't tear themselves away. There's like ten shark-shaped Metras floating up to it. Sometimes druids go away. Sometimes druids don't go away. What are you thinking, Metra? Metra is going to cast Fly on herself. Cool. Do you want me to roll to cast Defensively,
Starting point is 00:53:01 or has Dalgris sufficiently blocked me from danger? No, Dalgrith is on it in this made-up, horrible archetype that has no real rules. So you are within its reach, and you have to roll. So, cast defensively? Yes. I think I make this automatically. You don't know? Yes, I do.
Starting point is 00:53:18 I make it automatically. You do? Okay. It's a plus 25 against a DC 21. I wish you were rolling against something that my creature had, but it's just a standard roll for you. Yeah. Yeah, so you're all right. All right, so Mitra then takes off flying.
Starting point is 00:53:29 She takes off. And she'll go backwards so as to avoid... Well, now here's the problem. Attack of opportunity. Rolling to avoid attack of opportunity for casting the spell is one thing. Flying away would provoke again. I can roll acrobatics on my flying, can I? Or is it a fly check?
Starting point is 00:53:44 Well, you're trying to avoid an attack of opportunity. So you need to roll the acrobatics to avoid it. Cool. That is a 34. You're all right. That would have been great. You start to take off. The jaws.
Starting point is 00:54:03 But no, you are able to fly. And where do you fly? Just remember it's half speed then. So yeah, so now I can only fly 30 feet. So I'll fly kind of up. I'll get out of its range after I roll the acrobatics and kind of twist and dodge. And then I'll barrel roll up to the far side of the room.
Starting point is 00:54:20 And can I roll perception now that I'm up here? Yeah, absolutely. See if I hear anything, notice anything, sense any disturbances of the room. Can I roll perception now that I'm up here? Yeah, absolutely. Let's see if I hear anything, notice anything, sense any disturbances in the force. It's 98 teens, so that's going to be a 38 perception. Nice. 38 perception.
Starting point is 00:54:37 No, you don't hear anything. At this moment, you hear nothing. And it makes you very, very uncomfortable. Yes. The Pyropisees with Dalgrith on his back, right next to Jimmer as well, in bad shape. From both Jimmer's, mainly from Jimmer's attacks, but certainly from Dalgrith's stab here. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:55:05 Who to kill? So many characters around to permakill. And any sort of movement here is going to provoke from Jimmer, unless I attack Jimmer. So that's what I'm going to attempt to do. I'm going to try to take a bite out of Jimmer because it won't provoke if you move with me. And then let's just see what happens here. That is going to be, I don't know, you tell me
Starting point is 00:55:31 a 27. No, that is a miss. Goes to bite and misses. So with you on its back, it just slinks back five feet. it just slinks back five feet. Let's talk wall of fire here now that there's only
Starting point is 00:55:50 one Pyro Pisces left. Jimmer, you're going to go ahead and take 20 points of fire damage. Tickety tick tock away from your thing. Baron, you're going to take, just give me an hour and a half to pick up my d4s. You are going to take Just give me an hour and a half to pick up my d4s You are going to take
Starting point is 00:56:06 Five points of fire damage And Thun I think Thun is still safe So Thun doesn't take anything However, at that moment Metro, you see An area near you Again, out of the sky
Starting point is 00:56:24 Flames erupt And cover the entire party Everyone roll a reflex near you. Again, out of the sky. Flames erupt and cover the entire party. Everyone roll a reflex. Oh, man. I'm going back to Atlanta die. This is too much. Thune failed. I can't take this full damage. Atlanta die
Starting point is 00:56:40 comes through! 35. 28. 28 for Jimmer 35. Nice. Natty, 19. 28. 28, you're all right. 28 for Jimmer also. 37. Only Thun fails. 37?
Starting point is 00:56:52 Also a natural 19. Dalgrith, you're the only one with evasion, right? Baron doesn't have evasion. I don't have evasion. Yeah, I have evasion. You take nothing. Metra, Jimmer, and Baron take 34 points. Ooh! Wow! points of fire damage.
Starting point is 00:57:07 And poor Thun takes 67, so it is now cutting into his hit points. Thun. You got to get out of there, mate! So Thun will actually take 13 hit points. Man, thank God for the Absorb Energy spell. Oh, absolutely. We'd be shrimp on a barbie otherwise. We'd be toast.
Starting point is 00:57:26 Or prawn on the barbie, as they say in Australia. So yeah, you see those flames erupt. You hear it. Flames erupt, but you do not see the source. There's one Pyro Pisces left and at least one other creature
Starting point is 00:57:40 causing havoc in here and it is now Baron's turn. Baron will burst through the wall of flames. Yeah, he will. Recklessly, he's going to use... Hold on, you will take 17 points of fire damage. Not much resistance left.
Starting point is 00:57:57 Baron using more than a five foot step will have one shining moment to try to take down this pyro piece, Pisces, that is assailed by Dalgrith and Jimmer. Here we go. God damn it, out of the box. Get it in the box,
Starting point is 00:58:12 dude. Get it in the box, dude. 22 to hit. 22 to hit. Yeah, that's a hit. Here it comes. Get ready for the click-clack. Boom! Alright. Alright. That's 30 points of damage. That's enough.
Starting point is 00:58:28 Yes! Amazing. So amazing. Both kills on Baron's sheet. Wow. Check them off. Two grip points back. You're already full.
Starting point is 00:58:36 So, yeah, two of them dead. Did you take a five foot step to do that? No, I had to move more than five foot, so that's my turn. That's right, you walked through the floor. I mean, I could do a perception, but I don't think Metro hurt anything, so it's probably not worth my while. Go ahead and roll it. Who knows? That's not a bad perception.
Starting point is 00:58:52 That's a 35. Stone cutting? 37. Okay, yes. You see a secret door behind you, but do not know the source of that blast. I'm kidding about the secret door. Don't get too excited. Jimmer, it's your turn.
Starting point is 00:59:02 Jimmer, yet again, you're able to escape the maw of this flaming lungfish. What do you want to do? He yells out, where the hell's that fire coming from? I don't know. I'm going to do a perception check, too. It's probably useless.
Starting point is 00:59:19 Can't see a damn thing! 25. 25, yeah, you don't know. And remember, we were able to see what's at the bottom of the map. Our characters were right, that we can see at level 20 currently. That big-ass pile of treasure. Only Metra can see that because she has extended dark vision. But I'm sure she's told you at this point.
Starting point is 00:59:42 She mentioned it. You guys started slinking along. but I'm sure she's told you she mentioned it so you guys started slinking along there's a wall a pit of lava a wall of fire
Starting point is 00:59:48 and then forward Jimmer knows there's treasure there's lots of treasure yeah this is so
Starting point is 00:59:55 I'm thinking about like getting out of here but I would that would I'd have to pass through the wall of flame twice even to get out
Starting point is 01:00:04 um so Jimmer's just like to pass through the wall of flame twice even to get out. So Jimmers is like, he shouts to Metra, treasures that way, points in the direction. She nods. Great for radio. Thanks, Matthew. Good job, Matthew.
Starting point is 01:00:19 Really? I'm sorry. I'm trying to figure out a way to identify an invisible spell cast. It's surprising this is your 240th episode after our 6th year
Starting point is 01:00:28 he'll get it uh so he how's that for silent oh that's that's inappropriate Matthew put your pants back on
Starting point is 01:00:36 uh it's a it's get I'm gonna make my way over there I'll cover you we might have to get out
Starting point is 01:00:43 we might have to use magic. Spread out. We could just leave, but all that treasure. Yeah. We can't leave it behind. Look at the size of that treasure. Let Tramita set the treasure. I'm thinking that we should probably leave,
Starting point is 01:00:58 but I want to take a look at the treasure first to see if there's anything, at least anything we can grab quickly. So we might as well, like, gather up over there and then leave. Burn, draw fire! Jim, you walk through the wall and take 20 points of fire damage
Starting point is 01:01:14 there, now that you've exited the wall. And you start making your way, double move, basically, down towards the treasure. I just want to run. Oh, that, you have to do a straight line, right? Yeah. Straight line for a run, yeah. Alright, so I'm just going to double move. Just run through the magma. Burn away at that.
Starting point is 01:01:28 Oh, sure. I want to run where the magma is. Yeah, actually, I can make it all the way there. Just with a double move. I want to see. That was pretty amazing. I want to see it burning. That song actually does have lyrics about burning.
Starting point is 01:01:47 It does. So a double move moving around the magpie. Yeah. What's the word? Burn. When's it my turn? How much movement do you have, Skip? When will I burn away?
Starting point is 01:02:01 It's, uh... Oh, actually, no, not quite. Uh... Uh... I can get within, actually, no, not quite. Uh, that's a 3-5. Uh, I can get within, like, 20 feet of it. Jeepers. Yeah, this is a huge room, and Jimmer cooks it. He's now 20 feet away on the edge of the magma pit over there,
Starting point is 01:02:20 um, near the treasure. It is now Dalgrith's turn. Dalgrith, Deathbringer, what do you got? Dalgrith, I'm with you, Timur! He's doing the same thing. So, yeah, he's just gonna stay hasted and run. Book it. I mean, he's got 200 feet of movement to run when hasted. You're already out of the fire there, so you have a clean shot.
Starting point is 01:02:49 Yeah, I just, I can't cross over the lava, right? You can, it's just you're going to take some damage. Right, and I'm going to avoid that because I already took so much. So I can get to right next to Jimmer, basically, like 10 feet away from Jimmer, 20 feet away from the treasure. Okay, so you're a little bit south of Jimmer, but right near that sweet, sweet treasure.
Starting point is 01:03:09 It is Thune's turn. Thune is still in that wall of flame, but he is now alone there, so he is going to... Man, but he doesn't have any... Thune is gonna... Thune's gonna... He's in a cooker, man. He's gotta get out of there
Starting point is 01:03:25 You know what, I'm sorry I'm sorry He doesn't have any of the Reduced But then he's just gonna stay in there What's that, resist energy? Yeah, yeah Protection from energy
Starting point is 01:03:32 Protection from energy He's run out of it Yeah, but now Yeah, he's trapped in there Alright, so what were you gonna say? I need to go back Cause I can get to the treasure Cause I don't have to run to get there
Starting point is 01:03:40 A double move is a hundred feet While I'm hasted Okay So I can turn around And get right up to it So I wanna just see what's in there. Is it a fake? Is it mental loris in here for no good reason?
Starting point is 01:03:50 Or is there actual legit? Obviously, this is all happening in six-second increments, so you can't do a deep dive into it. Sure. But I can tell you what you see. Tons of coins. Okay. Gold. Gold, silver, platinum, copper.
Starting point is 01:04:03 You see it all. You see... all You see Multiple gems sprinkled in there as well All sorts of jewels, diamonds, opals You also see Potions And clothing I mean there's a lot
Starting point is 01:04:18 You see his face like glowing With like the magic And just a grin spreads across his face I just hope that it's not fake! All right. That is what you see. It's my turn. It's a hologram.
Starting point is 01:04:33 So Thun, yeah, you know what? This is brutal, but Thun is just going to run through to try and catch up to you guys, get out of the Wall of Flame, I guess. So he's going to take some damage, but there's really no way around it. So Thun will move out of there. And while he does, he takes 17 points of damage. I mean, this is unbelievably deadly without protection from anything Oh yeah
Starting point is 01:05:07 Or whatever Super Super Like we would have to just get out Like we would have no choice but to teleport out immediately Yeah we'd have to teleport like and we'd all be burnt to a crisp Yeah It is Metra's turn
Starting point is 01:05:18 Metra you are flying You see Thun emerge from the wall of fire What do you do? I can scream in pain Okay I would like to I gotta keep flying You see Thun emerge from the wall of fire. What do you do? I scream in pain. Okay, I would like to, I got to keep flying. As I do, as I move, I'll move first to kind of, and I'm going to point my detect magic, my cast detect magic and point that generally in the area of where, you know, above the lava,
Starting point is 01:05:42 where the flames came from the first time. See if I detect any, if that caster has anything magic on them. I should be able to detect it and if they're there. Within 60 feet? 60 feet. Let's see where you are here. I'll get to where I can be. I'm like 60 feet of the center of the room. You don't detect any magic. No magic.
Starting point is 01:05:58 All right. Gather the treasure. How far did you move? Show where you know i can show right yeah i guess i should do that on the map so you moved and then your standard is detect magic yeah so your rounds over and you say grab treasure yeah and i got like one round we gotta get out of here baron i hope you make it i'm roughly down if you don't dude you had a good run i'm gonna be thank you i appreciate that, dude, you had a good run. I'm going to be... Thank you.
Starting point is 01:06:25 Thank you. I appreciate that. You just didn't have a good run at the end. No. I'm going to fly directly across the lava. Okay. Fly directly across the lava. Watts, you're all very, very spread out now.
Starting point is 01:06:38 So I'm pretty close to the treasure. Yeah, you're pretty close to the treasure and, what, 20 feet above it? No, higher. I had to get over the Pisces, so I think I'm 30 feet in the air. Did you have to make any turns that you need to do fly checks? You went all straight. I went all under 45 degrees. Okay.
Starting point is 01:06:54 At full speed? Yeah. Okay. You don't have to go half speed? No, if you move less than full speed, you have to do a fly check. Okay. I wish this room was all under 45 degrees. It would be great.
Starting point is 01:07:06 Unless it was Celsius, and then we'd be in big trouble. No, it would still be alright. It'd still be like 115 degrees. It'd be very comfortable, but... Baron, can you see invisibility? Yes, I'm waiting for you to cast it on me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I can't see that much in front of me, because even though this room's filled with
Starting point is 01:07:21 magma, it's got darkness for some reason. Right. It's filled with fire and darkness. I wish... Oh, no, I can only target myself. Dude. Well, it's now your turn. So how dare you bring it up. All right, so, Metro, you flew over there near...
Starting point is 01:07:35 Detected no magic. Detected no magic. Flew over there near the treasure. Let's just see between Jimmer and Dalgrith what what's gonna happen right now i have an idea d6 throw in metro too let's just put it three way metro's flying all right you win i got nothing um i was just kidding, O'Bally. Actually. Thanks, Joe. I was just kidding.
Starting point is 01:08:14 He's usually a decisive man. I am. But not now. Something's happening over there. There's something bad in the hopper. Very, very bad. His eyes are... He's trying to decide which one he is actually going to take
Starting point is 01:08:28 permanently out of the store. We just want to point out that we do not... It's a big decision! Take it easy on him. We do not control that mortgage you just signed up on, so don't get angry at us. Metra, I want you to roll a will save. Oh, no!
Starting point is 01:08:45 Okay. Maybe he was going to turn Jimmer on us, but then realize that Metro's the better one to turn on us. Oh, shh. What did you roll there? I saw his face. My will save is my best save. Your best?
Starting point is 01:09:00 My best save. You're the best in the biz when it comes to will saves. But natural ones are no part of our eternal terrible, terrible business. No! We're all dead! Dominate person has just been cast on you. And the command that you get is
Starting point is 01:09:17 under no circumstances can you ever leave this room? And we'll see you next year. Oh, my God! One save! One roll!
Starting point is 01:09:35 Natural one! That's it! That's it, dude! the glass cannon podcast is a glass cannon network production and is an officially licensed partner of paizo incorporated giant slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission.

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