The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 242 - The Gun Also Rises

Episode Date: January 14, 2020

Barron Ashpeak, Sheriff of Trunau, hovers on the brink of death against a fearsome invisible magma dragon. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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And then it slashes once with its right claw. Followed a split second later with its left. Flash, flash! His life flashes before his eyes. Did I do the right thing? Did I do the just thing? Will this be the end of the gunslinger? Well, there's one character that's withstood the test of time and has been in every episode.

Every episode. The adventure continues. Get the fuck out of here. Fuck! What? Now. what is going on everybody it's your old pal t LaValle, and this might be a true first. A true first. Let me explain why.

First of all, you hear that fun little Irish laugh in the background? That cackling Irishman in the corner? It's my Irish rose, Joe O'Brien, everybody. How are you, buddy? What is up, Nish? What's up, good buddy? How are you? I'm a little on edge, Joe.

A little on edge. Me too, pal. Again, I like to give a little look behind the curtain once in a while, not all the time. Let people know what's going on. Right now, as we're recording this, it's Monday, January 13th at 6.15 p.m. We just went live on Facebook, Twitch, and YouTube with some huge Glass Cannon Network announcements. Right, and if you're not on those particular social media platforms, you might have missed it. You might have missed it.

So we're here to fill you in on what you might have missed. Right. And that stream was roughly 50 minutes. Yeah. So settle in. It's going to be about a 50-minute intro, do you think? Or are we going to cover it real, real fast? No, no.

This is what I'm going to say why this is the first this has ever happened. After we finish recording this this I have to finish editing The episode they're about To listen to Wait this episode? This episode You haven't edited this episode No man

You're going to listen To an unedited episode? No they're going to listen To the edited one I'm going to Oh I see what you're doing I see what I did right there You money McFly'd me

Exactly It's a time travel loop Back to my future No I've got to edit the episode So this is You know we're getting On the wire This releases in less than Six hours But it's just been a long ass day.

And this episode tonight requires my full attention. How are you going to cut all of my bad jokes in time? I'm leaving them all in. There's no time. No, no, no. I'm really fired about this episode that you're about to listen to. Oh, calm on with this episode. I'm not going to say anything else.

But I mean, if you're caught up, I mean, you know where we stand. Get ready for this ep. That's all I'm going to say about it because we've got too much news to fill you in on. Like Joe said, you can watch it. You can go to Twitch on the VOD. It'll be up on YouTube

24 hours later tomorrow. It may already still be up on Facebook. I'm not 100% sure. But if you want to watch that, we gab for about 50 minutes and we'll probably give you more details than what we're about to give you right now. Yes, obviously.

The thought behind everything is what you'll get if you watch that, and I think that's important. More important, yeah. I'm a story guy. I like the story of where things come from, and so that's what you'll get there. Here, you'll get the Cliff Notes version. Nuts and bolts. Nuts and bolts. Well, let me get right to it.

One of the first things we talked about is the next three cities on our tour. Obviously, we're going to be in D.C. next week. There are still tickets available for that D.C. show. And we announced Boston and New York, Gramercy Theater, and of course, then... Milwaukee and Chicago. Milwaukee and Chicago, right? Excited for those. Chicago sold out.

Milwaukee still available. Still available. That's a big theater. But I mean, getting close. Getting close. I didn't think we had any chance of selling that out. We've actually sold a ton of tickets. Oh, yeah. It's looking like it's going to sell out. Milwaukee still available. Still available. That's a big theater. But I mean, getting close. I didn't think we had any chance of selling that out. We've actually sold a ton of tickets. Oh yeah, it's looking like it's going to sell out. You know why?

A lot of people that missed out on the Chicago show are getting the Milwaukee tickets. Yes. Which is smart! Well, let me tell you about May and June. Wednesday, May 20th. We're coming to Portland, Oregon. The Doug Fur Lounge. Portland is where Praise Log began last year.

That's where it all started. But why a Wednesday, Troy? We talked about it on the stream. What a weird day. It's just so middle of the week. Really. What a great way to get over the hump, though. But the reason we're doing it on a Wednesday is because two days later, Friday, May 22nd,

during PaizoCon, we're going to Seattle, baby. We're going to Seattle, babe. Neptune Theater. We're doing it on a Friday this year. Wednesday, Portland, Oregon, at the Doug Furr Lounge, Friday, May 22nd, Neptune Theater. And then we're going to be at PaizoCon all weekend, just hanging and banging. You know old Hawk Raven and Chase and Orphan Punch are probably going to come along, too. Who knows?

We haven't even started talking about that stuff. But I mean, please, come on out to PaizoCon. If ever there was an excuse to make a trip to Seattle, come to the live show. Hell, drive down to Portland. We're going to be renting a car and throwing a bunch of idiots in a van while we drive from city to city. Come see that live show. Come hang out at the Glass Cannon Room at PaizoCon. Let's talk about June.

Let's talk about a little day in June I call Saturday, June 20th. We're coming to Columbus, Ohio, baby. Oh, yeah. During Origins Origins Which you're really excited about Which I have been to and you never have Never been

I'm excited to take you to your first Origins experience And we're wrapping it in with a nice little Glass Cannon Live Oh, Glass Cannon Live at the Newport Music Hall in Columbus, Ohio I know nothing about it I'm excited to go O-H-I-O, baby That is gonna be fun That is gonna be fun I have That is going to be fun.

I have thoroughly enjoyed Columbus when I've been there. I think going with a combo of origins and our live show is going to make it all the better. I can't wait. Moving on to more news. And by the way, more cities are going to be announced throughout the end of the year. Cities that we've never hit before. But that's all we're giving you right now. Calm down.

We mentioned this on social media. I put up a post on our blog uh if you haven't followed that we are hiring for the first time ever we are looking for employee one of the glass cannon network there are a bunch of qualifications online that you should check out before you submit your resume and uh yeah give that a look because this is a very very exciting thing for us because of the strength of our patreon we are able to bring on employee one yes you guys i mean this is something i said in the video but i can't stress enough how much all of our patrons and not just those on patreon but also those of you that have uh bought stuff on

our merch store that that really helped us out there on black friday and went and grabbed those sales and anybody that buys tickets to these live shows you're chipping away at bringing helping us bring somebody in here to be employee one. You know, to be the first person that's coming in as an actual employee of the network that is employed by the kindness of the niche to have a full-time job in tabletop gaming. Yeah. I think it's really exciting. Hey, this is a great outfit to work for. I don't know about that.

It's going to be hard work, man. Yeah, you might have to get your hands dirty. You might have to get your hands dirty. That's the thing, though, man. That's employee one work. You know, 10 years from now, when you're like, I was employee one, people will all be jealous. Right. And you know what you're telling that story?

On a beach in Malibu. Exactly. In month three, though? You're going to be like, this sucks. This is brutal. This is brutal. But yeah, come on. You're underselling. It's going to be a really good time, too. You get going to be like, this sucks. This is brutal. This is brutal. But come on. You're underselling.

It's going to be a really good time, too. You get to travel, go on the road with us. I mean, it's for the right person. It is going to be a really, really exciting opportunity. Yeah, I agree. Check out the blog, glasscannonpodcast.com, to see that information and how to send in your resume and cover letter. Moving right along, we announced the 50K call.

We hit $50, 000 a month on patreon just did you ever think we would hit 50 000 i mean i know at a certain point you did but when we were at like 5 000 were you like well first there's 10 and then obviously 25 and then 50 like is that how you thought about it because that's not how i thought about it oh brian i'm a dreamer you are you know that every step along the way i said you see what we're gonna do this we could do that we do that and you're like you're out of your mind, LaVallee, and here we are. Did I see 50,000? I don't know.

Yeah, you said 50,000 a long time ago, but you said it in conjunction with something along the lines of like, and at 50,000, we'll be in the Caymans. Like, you know. Glass Cannon Airlines. And I was like, do you know how much $50,000 actually is? Exactly. Well, so this was a big thing that we talked about. Let's get an airline.

That's amazing. This is what we talked about on the stream is like we wanted to make a goal that is doable. You know, doable for us. And we're not going to be taking away from the rest of our content because we're too stressed out. And also financially doable to us. Yeah, we don't want to lose money in the endeavor rest of our content because we're too stressed out and also financially doable to us. Yeah, we don't want to lose money in the endeavor.

Right, can't do it. There's no point in that. But it also has to be fun, exciting, and innovative. So keeping that in mind, this is episode 242 of the Glass Cannon Podcast. Let me tell you something,

sisters and brothers. In eight weeks, episode 250 of the Glass Cannon Podcast will be broadcast live. Live! We're doing three hours live of episode 250 250 of the Glass Cannon Podcast will be broadcast live. Live? We're doing three hours live of episode 250, and you know I'm going long. If you liked episode 100 and 200, it's going to bring in elements of that.

We're going to get this story wrapped up. We're going to move forward as the March to 300 begins in a live episode 250. And you know what the March to 300 is by another name. It's the March to the end The March to the end Truly the end It really is And as this thing

Starts to ramp up I mean I just I said it on the video I'll say it again The energy in the room here When we were doing 100 and 200 I can't wait

To bring that back And then to show it To everybody live Yeah You gotta You gotta join us for that It's gonna be incredible Reactions to big story reveals About other characters Some from the past and some from the future right in the present it's

huge and those of you that can't make it or can't sit for that or can't be in front of a computer whatever it is like it's releasing just as the same as usual on its usual day usual day and time but it's just gonna be super long and live so you're gonna get this this the feel of that energy i i think i don't know i think it's gonna be a blast when we told the guys they went nuts yeah they were all just like that sounds awesome what can i do to start prepping for that episode i'm petrified i'm petrified well yeah you have the most work of anybody yeah because it's got to deliver man it's got to deliver but when have we ever disappointed let's talk about the 75 000 goal

we said when we hit 50 uh this weekend we would also announce the $75,000 goal. If we are ever so lucky to get $75,000 a month on Patreon, we are going to do the first ever Glass Cannon Con. As we should, LaValley. As we should. A celebration of the niche. A celebration of the niche. Coming together in the single largest gathering of the nation that's ever happened. Yes.

We will be able to fund that to start that process because you have to understand that goes way beyond us. We can't just put together a convention, me and you, while we're doing all this other stuff. No. We have got to bring in experts. We have to bring in people that know what they're doing. Right. And that costs money. And so.

Two and three. Exactly. Exactly. Not to mention that the countless vendors and contractors that we'll have to talk to it doesn't matter for you though you don't have to worry about any of that crap we'll worry about that crap you just worry about your clear and your sketch when we get near and close to that 75k goal and then eventually hit i'm telling you troy we're gonna do it we will be notifying you how long you have and it's going to be well in advance. Oh, yeah.

I would say nine months or so. Oh, yeah. We want to make a big deal about it. And we'll let you know where it's going to be and how long it's going to be and what the plans are. But, you know, generally speaking, I think it's safe to say it's going to be a niche experience. It's going to be focused around partying, gaming, and live gaming for us.

Meeting new people and watching us do shows. Yeah. We joked about it on the stream, but it's no joke. If we do a three-day con, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, we'll do a live show every night. You heard it here first. Oh, baby! We'll do a live show every night.

I want to make it so that you have to come to this con. And that you have to stay the last day until nine people. That really sad day. That sad day. That's why we'll do Thursday, Friday, Saturday, so then people will be sad on Sunday. Maybe we should flip the script on cons and have that last day just have all the best stuff.

Right. Have it go all night long. I like that idea. I really like this idea. I'm going to write this down. All right. Take a note. Go on to the next.

Take a letter. Yeah, the next bullet point. I got one more piece of information. The biggest news I'm going to drop of all these news, believe it or not,

and then we're going to get to this episode because you've waited long enough unless you skip the intros, which, fuck you. The next thing we're going to announce,

you know, there might be people on the show that are like, okay, cool, doesn't mean anything to me. I don't even listen to that show. But for those of you who enjoy what we do and enjoy the rest of our shows.

Catalog. Our catalog. I think is the word you were looking for. Thank you. It was escaping me at the moment. We are very excited About this We posted something

On social media The other day A very cryptic picture That said 131.20 January 31st 2020 What does that mean

Well on January 31st 2020 That's a Friday night We are going live With our Starfinder show Dead Sons Androids and Aliens And that show

Will be live Every other Friday On Twitch Oh baby We're taking it live We're taking it live Androids and Aliens And that show will be live Every other Friday on Twitch Oh baby We're taking it live We're taking it live And not just like Oh you know like it was last

You might have seen some live shows last year Yeah You might have seen some of our And we admitted You know this was a testing It was garbage You might have seen Hey it wasn't garbage

Well it looked like shit Content was pure gold Content was great But it looked like shit But you're the kind of guy Who likes the way things look. I do. People eat with their eyes, man.

I like the way things sound. Yeah, yeah. And it sounded fine. Sounded great. But anyway, but it was, you know, we were prepping. We were in preseason, for those of you that I could use a sports reference for. We were in preseason. Well, now it's showtime.

Yeah. The real game is happening. The real show is happening. And as far as I know, man, we're ready. We have got the set. Wait till you see this set. We have got the lighting. Wait till you see the lighting.

I built a computer. Joe built a computer from scratch with screws and nickels. And my laser tools. I built my own processor. Now, specifically dedicated to streaming. So we don't have any of these drops. We don't have any of this crap like we've had before, hiccups in the technology. Look, can stuff happen?

Sure. But we have taken our fault out of it completely as much as we can. Yeah. Anyway. We're going to the big leagues. Yes. And I think you will see, if you tune in January 31st, 2020, that Friday night, what we have been working on for the past six months. This show, Androids and Aliens, I think the story is beyond exciting right now.

There's been a lot of stuff that's happened over the past few months in the show that are leading up to some very exciting things. And just to make things more exciting, we're also going to add some new personalities to the show. We're adding a new cast member to the show and we're adding a rules lawyer somebody to keep us honest so we can't because we're gonna be live i can't be like hold on i gotta look up that rule i'll be like yo what's the rule and you'll hear the voice come in with the rule it's going to keep us more honest and it's going to allow us to practice with working with the rules lawyer because honestly joe streaming is the future that's what we want to do but if you want to listen to the show if you don't enjoy watching streams

And you just want audio Androids and Aliens is still going to appear In your podcast feed Every Wednesday at midnight Like it always does Or Tuesday at midnight Nothing changes Oh except

Oh only that The episodes are going to be longer That's the only thing that changes With a new cast member And they're going to be even juicier And more exciting Yeah and with the rules lawyer Will be corrected on the fly

I mean I just I think it's so fun If it goes really well I don't know man juicier and more exciting yeah and with the rules lawyer will be corrected on the fly yeah i mean i just i think it's so fun if it goes really well i don't know man i'm gonna have a rules lawyer in glass cannon i'm not saying glass cannon live i'm saying just having somebody correct us on glass cannon is so necessary you're getting ahead of yourself i know we're but this high level combat i can't handle it well well hopefully you can handle this next episode because we've talked long enough. We can talk for hours. You know that. But please sit back and enjoy a very, very, very special episode. It really is, guys.

Of the Glass Cannon Podcast. Here's 242. Joe, let's go have a beer. There is a lot going on there is a lot going on with the network there is a lot going on with the glass cannon podcast there's a lot going on in this horrible horrible world that we live in but your old buddy troy lives in a house now. That's right. A real house. H-O-U-S-E. This morning.

Is that the biggest thing going on in the world? No, no. But I think people like to know what's going on with their friends. And we're their friends. I live in a house now, Joe. I know. We've talked about it. I just packed up my apartment.

Yesterday we had the movers come. They took everything. I loaded up the car. Two nights ago, my wife and baby and I and Kat went out there and just slept on air mattresses. Your friend Catherine? My friend Kat. She lives with you guys now? My Kat Linus. She lives in the house?

My friend Kat. My friend's Kat. A very progressive relationship. But today I had to go clean up. You guys know Kat. Fill the car. That's great. With everything else that was there and then I just swan song. That's it. 19 years I swan song that's it 19 years i've lived in this city 19 years four months in one day and i'm gone i'm out i've been there goodbye food after 10 i noticed a certain lightning in the air i'm not true i did order

food late last night yeah no you didn't door dash you paid 19 bucks extra but what else you gonna do i've been there for about a quarter of that 19 years i've seen i've seen you change i've seen i've seen some advancements happen i remember when you move from the apartment on the third floor to the apartment on the fourth floor and the thrill in your face when you got that patio oh man you said i'm gonna get myself an all-weather tv and i'm gonna be watching the baseball games outside all summer and you never watch one. I know. I did that first summer and then I had a child and used the deck three times that year.

But I really enjoyed it that first year. Did you take the patio furniture with you? I did. I took the patio furniture with me. I get it. That was expensive. That was nice stuff. And I've got a whole backyard now.

I've got a patio as well. And I'm all excited about it. Is it brick? The patio? Or is it just cement? So there's a deck and then there's a brick portion and then it's the yard oh that's fancy it was the yard that sold me on the on the whole house just because i wanted wait a minute a house with a yard what where are you living wichita and cattle and everything It's wild It's weird sleeping there though because it's so quiet

And I just hear everything And I assume we're going to get robbed Like every five seconds The suburbs are actually terrifying They are When I'm home and I walk my parents dog It's I mean it's so dark I live in New Jersey it's the most densely populated

State in the nation And I just assume the worst like the floodlight was going off every six minutes last night and so i woke up 2 30 3 30 oh and i'm like well that's just a murderer right that's just the local murderer come to claim his new victims and valley strangles us i was looking out there i was turning on lights it's 4 30 i'm walking around the house turning on lights to let make it look like there's some weirdo that's up like don't you don't you come to me i was like home alone guy making a cutout dance i was legitimately freaked out i kept peeking out little tiny windows i'm like is that just squirrels what's going on out there so i gotta get used to that but those are your new possum overlords you welcome our new possum um hail

ants but the reason I bring it up It's very exciting it's a huge change And I couldn't have got there Obviously without my amazing wife Who works her ass off but without the Four guys sitting at this table and without Glass Cannon Nation so I want to thank You Grant Skid Matthew and Joe

For putting up with me for five years And hopefully at least another five I was just going to say are we done And that's it He got his house Matthew and Joe for putting up with me for five years and hopefully at least another five. I was going to say, are we done? He's got his house. He's got his house. That's 242 in the books. And also to all the suckers.

I just walked away. It's the podcast version of The Office winning the lottery. Everybody just leaves that day. He paid cash. He's out. He's out. I want to thank the nation as well. You buy our merch. You come to our shows.

You subscribe to our Patreon. Or you just support us in other ways. I want to thank all of you as well. It's very exciting. But now we've got to record these because I've got a long drive home. Where did we leave last week? I feel like it wasn't a big deal. Not very memorable.

Not very... What was it? Pembroke and Umlo were at the tavern. Yes, that's right. And then Ingrid Hilde... I think Lork just got his feet back. He just got his feet back. He barged in the door.

Ingrid Hilde Is doing a little dance On a table With What is this bit? I don't know I was enjoying it The bit is There's a lot of characters

On this show Ah yeah That's true Trying to keep them all straight Is hard But there's been one character Who has withstood The test of time

Tom Exposition Well yes Tom Exposition We'll see you next week Well there's one character that has been in every episode every episode um was he in 100 yeah he was in 100 if you logged on to imdb right now would say bad red heart in parentheses 242 episodes how could not for any other character would it say that How dare you leave out

Howie the Green Stink Scorpion Every He has not appeared In every episode He has been there It doesn't matter He's not credited Maybe if you went to IMDB

You'd see Howie the Green Stink Scorpion Uncredited Baron is the Noah Wiley Of the Glass Cannon Podcast Didn't Eric LaSalle Get there too? No

I looked it up real quick Are you you kidding no wiley has been in the most episodes at 254 second only to laura ennis who was 250 never carter and carter and benton had a wonderful tearful farewell in the park benton tried to get away without saying goodbye hey matthew don't use your hands to talk to me ever again. I was illustrating the beautiful blocking. What is this? It's two people getting together in a park. Benton's running. Carter waits for him because he was trying to sneak away.

Oh, man. Wow. Yeah. Craziness. Craziness. This is 242, right? I'm getting that correct. Yeah, yeah.

242, same episode. If you say it forwards or backwards, if that's something that interests you. It's a palindrome episode. A palindrome interest you? 11 was a palindrome episode, too. Ladies and gentlemen, if you think you can't own a home, just look at this genius over here. I'm living proof. But watch out for those squirrel motorists.

They're coming what was episode 11 episode 11 was the one right before 12 i think i know it i think it was four warnings and a funeral i think no i think that was like five or six no no i'm not right you are incorrect well either way there's one guy that's been here to us all while matthew looks it up um four warnings and a few wow give me all your bottle caps i'm really good with the old stuff the new stuff in the middle i have a problem with now listen episode 11 was also the the introduction of we are stupid really oh i'm sure we were stupid for at least the first ten episodes.

No, no, no. Episode nine was. Oh, yeah. I remember that. That was gelatinous cube. We were very stupid. I miss those articles. And we are still very stupid. Yes, we are. But it's not that we don't care. We certainly care. But what I don't want to do is to have these recordings last three hours because we're combing over every single rule. At a certain point, whether it's a home game or a show that a million people listen to,

we just gotta keep this moving. And so, like, even in this fight, there's things that now, in retrospect, we realize we got wrong. We. I'm saying we, Matthew. We all got things wrong. At a certain point, there comes a time where you can just blame Matthew and move on. If I leave little, he won't hear it.

There's a lot of things we got wrong, but in my opinion, I think it all evened out. Obviously, I dominated you, and you are... Obviously, I dominated you. I dominated you. Roll over.

Obviously, I dominated you. It's a full round of cast I didn't do that You're not a person So I can't do it Isn't that the correct thing? No You're not subject

As an outsider You're not subject to The person spells How dare you Try to deny Metro's personhood Did you know about this? I don't think any of us

Knew about it Did you know about this? This has come up before But not with a charm Or dominate spell But like that It did happen Fetchlings are not humanoids.

It did happen at some point within large person, I think, but I don't know if it was in this campaign or another campaign where it was an outsider and it was like, oh, that doesn't, you're right. You know what I'm talking about?

It might've been Jade Regent. I think it was Jade Regent. It rang no bells for me. I did not remember that rule at all. We've definitely discussed it. It came up with Della and I can't remember under what circumstance but we did discuss that fetchlings are outsiders and then sub or but that's but not humanoids but we never talked about this well i mean i it was news to me um but uh so long ago there's nothing we can do about it now and in my defense it didn't really

change joe even though he'll uh disagree with this uh dalgrith does not get a free action to, not on his turn, to have jumped off. So even though it doesn't make sense to you, that thing... To me? Yes. No, it doesn't make sense at all. That's fair.

But by the rules of the game, he would have to stay on there. It makes sense to all the developers at Paizo who made this game. Well, yeah. Otherwise, they would have done something else, Joe. So I could have taken you into the magma. This is a Specific instance.

I don't think they thought of this in 07. Oh, they thought of this. They put this together. They thought of this. One day, a vexing Dodgers drug into a pool of lava. That was the exact example that they cited that day. Long before that archetype existed. Is this like Supreme Court precedence here?

Yes. I mean, the lava thing would have changed the fight immeasurably. The dominate person has yet to actually have an effect on the fight.

No, no, no, it hasn't. It will very shortly. Yes, yes. But who knows? Maybe you would have got out of there. Maybe you would have got out of there.

I mean, it's been one round since you cast that, right? I guess we'll never know because we have to move on. We all have to move on. Stop looking at me, you bastard.

This is so awful. It's the time in life when you just, you just have to move on. To a house. To a house. In the suburbs. Where there are murderers

lurking in the bushes. Just waiting at every turn. How do you think you'd, how do you think they'd kill you? I don't know. I just assume everyone has a gun gun because it's not the city it's not the city like everybody has a gun out there and so i'm just gonna get shot um there's nothing i can do they don't have like farming equipment they could use to kill you this is like a hoe yes i don't know a sickle

i got hit with a hoe um yeah i don't know it freaks me out though I think I'll get used to it but it's strange I feel like that when I go to my parents house too I'm sleeping I'm like I need a lot of noise on right now Because this is terrifying But what is also terrifying Is the situation that The party finds themselves in

Baron Take it back a moment You're standing there and just as you're about to lay eyes On this creature with your sea invisibility powers, it takes an enormous bite out of you. You see it now, this dragon with red lava running through its scales. It just takes a bite out of you. And then it slashes once with its right

claw, followed a split second later with its left. Splash! And now you're just standing there, just like teetering on the heels of your feet, Mortal Kombat style.

Finish him! Your eyes are blinded with blood and sweat and you can barely make out this huge dragon hovering inches away from you backlit by that bubbling pool of magma behind it

you know in your heart you've been through a lot of battles you know that if you just took one step forward you would just crumble to the ground, crash and fall unconscious. In that moment, cliched though it may be, your life

flashes through your eyes. It has to. It has to just flash past your eyes. What do you see? Well, I'm standing there and i'm dipping in and out of consciousness and it's hard to focus on anything and i'm feeling the heat of the room now it's really overpowering

and suddenly the sound of bubbling magna in the room that's surrounding this treasure, keeping us away from it, is replaced with the sound of crackling fire. I look up and I see True Now. True Now is burning. Acrid smoke suffuses the air and stings the survivors' nostrils. The wooden ramparts and palisades that once stood proudly. Vigilant Oaken warriors now lay decimated, stained chrism by a squall of blood. This is victory.

It's an empty, terrible thing. I see days, town folk and militia men dawdling about, dumbstruck by the toll. Friends, brothers-in-arms, lovers, even children, all strewn about the hope spring. Soon, a funeral pyre will consume their remains and leave behind a pit of ashes and a sea of broken dreams. their remains and leave behind a pit of ashes and a sea of broken dreams. I see his handshake as he draws deeply from the leathery cigarrillo.

His body quivers as he exhales the gray tobacco smoke. It's enough to momentarily mask the battle stench, but not enough to soothe his nerves. He speaks to no one in particular. Was it bravery or fear? Baron Redheart, the drifter, glares across the city-turned-battlefield. Situated atop a hill surrounded by watchtowers and battlements, his eyes meet the horizon just as dusk arrives to usher the day away and welcome the night's mournful embrace of true now. A sliver of a moon hangs gently above it all.

He lifts his eyes to the heavens to regard this silvery thing and remains transfixed as the stars take their places here, there, and everywhere. His pupils reflect back the sparkling stars themselves as he wonders, Did I do the right thing? Did I do the just thing? Baron closes his eyes to see the barrel of the gun he stole from his father trained directly on the back of a man running away towards escape, toward freedom.

Screed, the bastard. He did this, he did all of this, and he deserves to die. Baron's blood rushes from his heart to fill his face with indignant red rage as his trigger finger tenses and BAM! Just as the bullet rips through back flesh, a hand falls upon Baron's shoulder. In one fluid motion, he stirs, whips around, and draws his pistol. Please, Baron, it's only me. Pleads a handsome young man with a scar across his cheek.

Galabras, daggummit, I thought you were one of them. Sorry, sorry, I should know better. Are you all right? I'm fine. Fine. Just shook up. I've never been in so much trouble before. Never seen so much death.

Galabras surveys the carnage. It's staggering. Somehow I just assumed that you might be more used to death than I am. You ever been scared for your life before, Galabras? Galabras smiles weakly. I'm always a bit frightened, I think. Sometimes it's all I can do to just keep going. Baron reaches into the breast pocket of his duster

to retrieve a rune-covered stoneware bottle of dwarven whiskey. Sometimes I think it's the fear that keeps me going. Keeps me sharp. He pauses, uncorks the bottle, and takes a swig. Wincing, he continues i just i've been on the run for so damn long not sure if i can keep up this pace you want some baron offers the bottle to galabras i had to leave home gill it wasn't under what you might call ideal circumstances. That sounds a bit ominous.

Sadja. Her name was Sadja. She was kind and funny and as beautiful as a jewel. The type of woman to make a man do stupid things. I told my parents I intended to make her mine. They laughed in my face at first, but when it became clear I meant business,

they damn near disowned me. They forbid me from ever seeing her again. She was noble born, a station well above that of our meager little family. It would have been a scandal if I had even tried. When they told me no, I couldn't abide by it.

I went straight to the apothecary and I bought some of this and some of that and I put it in their ale at supper time. They drank it down and boom. Lights out. I'm sorry. Are you saying you killed them? Oh, God's no Calabras, it was just to put them to sleep for a while. I just needed enough time to sneak into Daddy's armory. So I did. I geared up, holstered up this pistol here,

and somehow ended up in True Now. I was lucky enough to find someone like you, and Gormley, and even Lork. Did I do the right thing, Galabras? I lied, and stole, and ended up on the other side of Encarthen somehow. I know it's wrong, but sometimes it feels like doing the wrong thing ain't so

bad if it doesn't hurt anyone. Hell, I think I ended up helping some people today. Gell looks at Baron and looks out over the battlefield and he says

The goddess teaches us that no dreamer is beyond redemption. I sense conflict in you but also a great desire to do good. I can tell you that I I have faith in your path for my part.

Thank you, Galabras. I think I only know one thing for certain right now. My name is Baron Redheart, and I'm proud to call you a friend, Galabras Finn. Now let's see if we can get to the bottom of all this. I will be with you, Baron Redheart,

wherever the road will lead us. For some I feel that all roads may lead back here. You might be right. Maybe this could be home one day, Gale. Someday I see you sleeping real easy here. Maybe I'll have a little place of my own down the road from you.

And it flashes back to this moment as you stand before this mighty beast. And if you're not crying right now, then you have the soul of a Capitacasa and the heart of a Capitacasa. It really got me towards the end there.

Yeah, man. With the old down the road. I'm so sad. I just picture it. I know. That was their thought. Like, baby, this place ain't so bad. Have a little place down the road.

This dragon still has several attacks left. Oh, God. Can we just do more of that? Just do more. There are so many other things in your life, Bear Bear. Let's see some other ones. What movie does that sound like? It's a ton of movies.

I don't know. There's one in particular. It's not coming to me, but I remember weeping at it. You guys see this. All of you are accustomed to war. You know what death's door looks like. And you see it in Baron's eyes. You see that in three strikes it took Baron to where he stands now.

You know what the situation is. The dragon rears up. Spreads its massive wings. Its tail whipping behind it to lay down the killing blow. It looks around at all of you. This baron is just in la-la land. And it speaks. You are no match for the mighty Tesseract.

How you found yourself this deep into Ashpeak will be a story no one will ever know. Unless... The dragon, named Tesseract, unless the dragon named Tesserat cocks its head perhaps thinking for a moment who knows what happens in the mind of a dragon lay down your weapons

and surrender and I will spare the dwarf's life and yours anything else and I will destroy him in front of you before doing the same

to each and every one of you all of you. All of you will breathe your last breath in Tesseract's lair. Choose. What

do you do? Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! Whose turn is it? It's Tesseract's. do you do? Whose turn is it? Whose turn is it? Stasheratz. Oh, yeah, he's in the middle of his action. So are we coming out of, are we, he's, he's, it's a sort of, we're stepping out of,

stepping out of the initiative already here for a moment. It's a really, really, and I love these, really long free action love these, really long free action. I love a good, juicy, long free action. You know, we're making the joke about how you can't take the free action to pull off the Pyropise that's dragging you to your death, but you can take

a free action to talk, even though these rounds only last six seconds, and you could just pontificate. Exactly. And then do your fifth attack. Fourth, fifth, and sixth attack. Metra draws a dagger that she has on her person and flies down to land next to Baron and tosses her dagger into the pile of treasure

and standing next to Baron. Metra, I won't allow you to fly. You have to stay where you are and drop your weapon. All right, I drop my weapon. Can I toss it? Am I close enough that I can toss it into the pit? I can just drop it into the lava. You can just drop it right into the lava.

You're flowing over there. I drop it into the lava. Dalgrith? Dalgrith has a holy short sword in his hand, and he just squeezes the blade for a second, white-knuckled, and then just throws it on the ground in front of him. Clang, clang, clang.

And he just puts his hands up and a smile spreads across his lips and he's like, well played, you got us. Jimmer? Jimmer looks like he sees Baron imminently about to die and what his compatriots have done.

And he like, he shakes his head grits his teeth and takes Terminus Est and lays it gently at his own feet lays his shield down next to it steps back and puts his hands up above his head

Thun rushes at Tesha next to it, steps back and puts his hands up above his head. Thun rushes at Tesha. I saw that coming. For true now! That flashback will be gone to me! Thun looks at all of you Oh my god And without hesitation Drops his frost

Plus one frost wounding battle axe My god Tesserat Can we see Tesserat battle axe? Like you Matthew want to take a peek at it? No I'm like we're interacting You're just hearing this voice Does he make himself visible?

No. No, not yet. So we heard him cock his head? Yeah, we heard him cock his head. You got me. He's visible. No, no, no. Baron was just like, he cocked his head.

Yeah, Baron was narrating. Actually, that would have knocked you unconscious. He just cocked his head. Nope, nope. He's cocking his head. Disabled is mover standard action, free action. Oh, that's right. Sign talk. If you could see him right now, he's cocking his head. Disabled is mover, standard action, free action. Oh, that's right. Sign talk.

If you can see him right now, he's cocking his head. And if you look it up, Core Rule Book 246, except narration. Pure narration is a standard action. Depicting the acts of invisible creatures. All right, you don't see it. But imagine that look. We all imagine him'd cock his head I'm telling you

I don't need to see it To have that Well this hearing This voice Coming from From nowhere Like just echoing Off the walls

Of the chamber And with how close It is to us I feel like we could Feel it like Shaking our chest Yes Right into our ribcage

The voice was hot And booming Tesseract lets out a mighty roar again. This roar! But does any of you speak Draconic? I've asked you this a few times. I don't believe I do. I can write it, but I can't speak it.

You can tell that it's more than a roar. Tesseract is speaking in Draconic. This roar! It sounds like a roar to you, but any of you with any sort of, you know, knowledge of linguistics knows that he's speaking. And within moments, you hear the footfalls of several creatures running towards this room.

You look, and down the hall there, or the cave wall, you see a dozen or so giants Some clearly fire giants But some different With like auburn And ashen skin Familiar looking But you can't quite place them

Well I'm sorry What? Multiple dragons Are running into the room Giants Giants Yes multiple dragons

Come running in On their little legs It's like Why don't they just Call the boss No A dozen or so giants Some fire Some other Tesserat then appears.

And motions to the four of you and speaks again in Draconic. And you see her pointing directly at them, like telling them something very, very specific. And it looks like only one of them understands Draconic. Would you like me to roll a hover check? No, you haven't, Matthew. You just fall into the magma. The giants rush up to you.

One of the giants points to you, Metra, and demands that you come down and join your friends. Metra nods politely and flies down and lands next to Baron. You're so polite. As you do so, the giants are already rushing up to you, and things start happening really, really quickly.

Baron falls to the ground as a couple of them rush up to him. A few of them gather up your weapons, and the rest just grab you and put bags over your head. Please, my friend, just stabilizeizing before you do anything else? Bag over your head. Tie around it. They start tying you up. And then all of a sudden, you just...

They start cuddling you from all angles. Just boom, body blow. Boom, boom, boom, boom. I'm sorry. I can't leave the room. You're all tied up. You're completely helpless. You have a bag over your head.

My helpless AC is 11. I'd like an attack roll. I'd just like to let you all know That I can't leave the room Please Just don't carry me out of this room They try to take you Metro kills herself

Rather than leave the room It's a domination thing You wouldn't understand The giant's like Did he take a whole round to cast it? Is she a person? No it all happens very fastly. Just like, fastly, quickly.

It all happens really fastly. It all happens really quickly. In the middle of your speech there, Dalgrith, bag goes over your head, and you're thrown to the ground, and you feel them. You don't understand. They're hog-tying you,

and then they just start beating you. A punch here, a punch there. And eventually, all of you take enough non-lethal damage to fall unconscious. Metra, you awake first. Before you even open your eyes, all you can hear is like muffled sounds of shouting,

grunting, and screaming. You open your eyes, and light blinds you for a moment. It's daytime, and you're outside. You look around, and you see that you're in a small cage

by yourself. Surrounding the cage, as far as you can see, are hundreds and hundreds of giants Oh my god You realize that you are in the giant encampments outside of Ash Peak The volcano looming in the distance They're yelling, they're eating, they're fighting. And you're watching them all, just, they're staring at you,

they're looking at each other. And as you look around at the various types of giants, you see another cage, similar to yours, maybe 25, 30 feet away. And even though there's all this stuff with the giants going on, there's a human man inside. And he's just staring directly at you

like nothing else is happening. And you lock eyes. What does that man say? Excuse me for saving love. Get the fuck out of here! Fuck! What? But there is just something so familiar about your eyes.

God damn it! familiar about your eyes how come everybody got to have fun on this episode but you didn't send me any emails i didn't get any emails okay you didn't either all right we're in this together we're audience participants i think both matthew and i thought you were asking him or matthew i was like i to be like, are you asking me? Well, he says. He says. Why aren't you pretty? He says, here's the key to your cage.

This is the way out. Catch. Here's a wand of wish with 50 charges. You don't know this man, but he thinks you look very familiar. What's your name? My name? No, sorry. So rude again.

Nester Coyne. Coyne by name, Coyne by nature, as my old dad used to say. And who might I have the pleasure of speaking with? My name is Metra. Metra Narnra Narn. Narn. Narn, is it? Warnock would explain it.

Well, you wouldn't happen to have been related to a certain young woman of similar hue to yourself who was named Delanarn, would you? Who are you? Who are you? Who put you here? My daughter is dead. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no one said about it but me. I did my best to keep her alive, I did, but these people,

I use the term loosely, I did, but these people, I use the term loosely, are not very civilized, are they? He looks out over the giant encampment. He's kind of hanging on the cage with his legs hanging out, like Mad Mardigan.

You knew my daughter? Yeah. Not as well as I would like, but yeah. Why are you here? Oh, it's a long, sad story. But, uh, to cut it short, uh,

these, uh, folk have been after me for some time, and, well, they caught up with me, didn't they? Oh, I thought he was our fucking jailer, and that's why I was yelling, fuck. He was in a cage, Grant. I just heard his voice. I had never seen Grant. Like, I thought that F-bomb was for excitement. And then I looked across, and he was, like, grabbing his temples, and his face was all red. And I was like, I never knew he hated Nestor so much.

But I didn't say anything. I thought he was going to kill us all. It can't get worse than we're at. I don't know. I prefer that, friends. Maybe. At least the death would be quick and painless. No, now revise that F-bomb into a hooray-bomb.

Drop a hooray-bomb. An H-bomb. An H-bomb. Oh, no. Actually, that might be a solution to our little problem. Yeah, here we go. Hooray! I'm burning alive!

Oh! Have you been here long? Hooray! I'm burning alive! Have you been here long? I've been here for a couple of weeks, I think. I didn't come here alone. No, I saw there were some others. I don't know where they ended up, but, yeah, they tossed you in there. Lucky me, eh? I can get us out of here.

Can you? Or rather, I can get me out of here. Would be lovely if you could include me in the little plan. I came here with others. I'm leaving here with others. You help me get them out. I'll get with others. I'm leaving here with others. You help me get them out.

I'll get you out. Oh, yeah, that sounds like a bargain. Tell me something. Before we... go on this journey together, what did my daughter think of you? Hmm, don't know. Go on this journey together. What did my daughter think of you? Hmm, don't know.

She ran a bit hot and cold with me, to be honest. Hard to say at the end what she settled on. Are you good in the fight? Yeah. Not bad. Although, uh, I need the tools to maximize my talent, as it were. You know where those are? No. Uh, if you really want the kind of help I think you need, you're going to need to help me to find out where they are.

Metro looks around at the giants. Are they giants are they are they like watching us talk they're they're you know they they they're so they're they're in their own thing they're doing their own thing and they're watching you but like animals at the zoo you're so small to them roll a perception check though 23 all right so your eyes went to, obviously, the crowd of giants, and then you were struck by this person calmly staring at you, but you see that there are other cages, maybe 40, 50 feet away from you to the south.

You see a cage which looks like Dalgrith is lying in it, and maybe he's starting to stir, and then another 40, 50 feet away from you to the north looks like what's got to be Baron, still unconscious in his own cage. You don't see Jimmer or Thune anywhere. Shall we wait for nightfall or shall we do this now? Probably to fewer eyes on us.

What do you say? I agree. I work better in the cover of night. Oh, woman after my own heart. Plus it gives us a bit of a chance to get to know each other doesn't it? I guess so. Doug, if you wake up and you take in this scene as well.

Oh, my bloody head. He looks around. He can see Metra? Yeah. Now, if you see Metra, you can't see Baron. Baron's too far away from you on the opposite side of where these cages are, but you see Metra talking to this person you don't recognize in another cage. Metra.

Metra. Metra. Talgryth. Are you hurt? Uh, everything hurts a bit, but I think I'm alright. He's testing. Moving his limbs around, checking his joints. Everything seems alright. A bit sore

is all. Do you see Jim or do you see Thun? Do you see Baron? I can see Baron I don't know if he's alive or dead, but I can see him Look close, is he breathing? Can I do a perception check? He might have not known he was dying

25 You stare at Baron and you really train your eyes on him Trying to block out everything else that's going on The hooting and hollering And you see his back raise and go back down he's alive for now

thank the gods wherever they are I don't know if they can get us out of this place but at least Baron's alive that gives us hope I was just discussing that with this gentleman next to me they can get us out of this place. But at least Baron's alive. That gives us hope. I was just discussing that with this gentleman next to me. What'd you say your name was again? Oh, it was, uh,

Nestor Coyne. Cornball name, Cornball nature, etc. Nice to meet you. Dolgreath Deathbringer. Pleasure to meet you, Dolgreath Deathbringer. I've heard your name before. The Dolgreith Deathbringer. I think you'd be the first, then, to see me in a cage. To give you bragging rights at the pub.

Except when I was a go-go dancer. Back in the 70s. That one. It was one night. It was one night. It was one night. I was about to say, that does fall in line with the reputation

I'm familiar with. No, it's just you that brought down a great purple worm of badong chinks. That was me. Aye. That was many years ago.

How mighty have fallen, eh? I feel like I was a mark quicker then. He tries to eye up Nestor. How old does Nestor look? It's hard to say. Oddly ageless. Yeah, I was going to say. He's bald, but he's in really good shape.

So, anywhere from like 30 to 45. You look like you got the fight in you. I said, we'll brought you up against these giants where you're trying to just bite off more

than you can chew. Yeah, he's just telling your friend here. It's a long story, but yeah. We got some time. Well, it turns out

I fell afoul of whoever it was that's in charge of all this they heard that I took down one of their lieutenants so they took it on themselves

to send out all the agents they could after me couldn't find a moment's peace everywhere I went. Wanted man. Yeah, they were on my heels everywhere. The ambushed drinking hall,

gambling hall, the knife out of the darkness. Nothing I could do. Hard to live as a hunted man. It is. It truly is. And I thought, you know, I thought my time with these creatures

was done. I thought my, I thought my, my books had been balanced. But, I realised that if I ever wanted to have a peaceful life, I'd have to take ever wanted to have peace with life,

I'd have to take the fight to them. So I came here in search of the one that sent them all out after me. And, well, as you say, I bit off a bit more than I could chew, didn't I? So here I am with you lot. Metro, can you get us out of here? I can. But we need to find Jimmer first.

We need to find Jimmer. We need to find our weapons. Can I test the cage? And Thune. And Thune. I said Thune before. No, you're like, we've got to get Jimmer out of here. Fuck that Thune.

Can I test the cage? Just do, I guess, a perception up and down, looking for weaknesses. Yeah. I want to test the fences for weaknesses. They remember. They remember. Uh, 33. Ooh.

Solid. All the way around. Well built they are, Metro. And he's doing it, like it surreptitiously. He doesn't want to be seen by the giants pulling on the poles and everything. You have to wonder what manner of creature used to use these cages. It's all very awful. Are they large?

Are they spacious to us? They're not spacious to you, but it seems like some of the bars are bent a little bit, like large creatures that shouldn't have fit in there were put in there in the past. Can I do a detect magic on the cages to make sure there's no kind of magical bonding that's going on? One, one, one, one, one. You don't detect any magic. Have you ever known me to be constrained by cages, Darkwreath?

No, no, I just wanted to... I thought maybe before we used too much, I could... I don't know if you could get me out of here invisible or something, I could pinpoint Jemma before we did anything else. Interesting idea. I don't have any kind of illusion magic.

They'd know you were gone. Best to wait till darkness falls. It's a good thing I do. Oh, yeah. No, no, I don't. I'm sure they stripped me of my armor. Yeah, what do I have on me?

Do I have my cloak of etherealness? Are we in loincloths? They've stripped you of all your magical items, weapons, and armor. So my belts are gone, too? Like that kind of stuff? Okay. He reaches around.

No, they've left us with nothing. Let me think. Let me think. Perhaps we could get out of them, Mitra. Maybe we'd play our cards right with the giants here. They could tell us, even if they don't mean to if jim is alive where he might be do i have any idea where our stuff might be no when you were taken here they stripped you of your armor um they didn't rough you up as much as them they're all sitting on about

one two hit points um uh you uh you you're probably about half HP Only lost to like starvation Because they haven't fed you And fatigue But you saw them take it And it went off into the crowd somewhere While you guys are standing there Jailer comes by

And starts rattling your cages And they all start getting fired up And they notice that Baron is still unconscious So he walks over to where Baron is, whips out his manhood, and pisses on Baron, and the crowd goes crazy, and Baron, you wake up

to the rush of water over your face. Dalgryth just jumps up, and he grabs the kid. He's like, You fucker! You're gonna pay for that! My words are gonna pay for that! If you speak giant, heer, you're going to pay for that. All my words are going to pay for that. You speak giant.

He said, you're next. Better me than him. You're making a grave mistake. You don't know what you're doing. Baron, you wake up and just there's this horrible stink on your skin. You touch it, wipe away the wetness. You put two and two together pretty quickly. And you look around and you see Metra in a cage.

And you see Nestor Coyne in a cage about 50 feet away from you. His eyes, which are kind of crusted over by being unconscious this whole time, probably even fighting off infection from how weak he was, take in the scene and they're hazy and foggy and they see Metra and Dalgrith and he sees Nestor and his eyes are as big as dinner plates. And he doesn't say anything, he just stares at him. His ribs are cracked covered in giant piss it's ammonia smell covering him it's normal sized piss normal sized piss but from a giant stares at him

turns away for a moment looks back funny running into you here Nestor my old friend I'm probably not the person you wanted to see at this very moment My old friend. I'm probably not the person you wanted to see at this very moment. Although you might have been looking forward to seeing me again, am I right?

I don't know. Under which circumstances it would be good to see you again. You know him, Baron? I do. What's so special that he's here? He knows him. He knows him. He's a killer. And a thief.

I think a killer and a thief is exactly what we need right now. He's the best killer and thief I've ever seen. Oh, thank you. Thank you. I'm blushing. Wait. Is he the one? The one who traveled with you when Della was killed?

The same. The one who murdered your companion. His name was Umlo. How could I forget? Nesta coin. Now Dalgrath looks like new daggers into him. I imagine, of course Baron has told Dalgrath all about this. Before we move forward I need one thing to be clear

with the power invested in me by true now and the divine power relinquished upon me by Torek I sentence this man and the divine power relinquished upon me by Torek. I sentence this man to death. That may not be the most helpful thing to do right now, Baron. He's just dying. Literally dying right there.

Covered in shit and piss. Oscar performance. Where's my Baron bottle cap? literally dying right there, covered in shit and piss. Oscar performance. That was pretty good. Where's my Baron bottle cap for the day? How about a Galabras bottle cap? That's a good one. The gift of a second chance. Listen, mate, I knew you'd be angry if we ever run into each other again.

I knew it. But you have to see things from my perspective. I had to carry out justice myself. I'm low with committing a crime that I couldn't let pass. But I had perfect opportunity to kill all the rest of you in your sleep

the way I did him. I could have taken everything that you had and profited immensely but I didn't do it because I'm not that sort of person. So in a way, you owe me your life.

In that moment you hear Brander's words echo in your mind. I'm not giving you the gift of life, Ashpeak. I'm giving you the gift of knowledge. Baron,

do you think you can stand? Or heal yourself I don't know if what I had was called rest but yes I just don't want them to see that I still have any fight left in me or else they might kick me down again no I don't I'm not asking you to do it now. I'm just asking if you can. Is he still wearing his gloves? Would they know that those were magic?

Yes. Okay. He is wearing them or they knew they were magic? Yes, they knew they were magic. I would love to be whispering to you right now with this, but I can't. That's all right. Is it a new day? It is a new day.

As far as you know, you've lost all sense of time. But every time you were traveling to Ashbeak, it was always at night. I assumed as much. That's the way you traveled around Skirgard. So it's a new day. I'm going to reset, but then bring myself down to one hit point, as you said. Bring it down to a solid one. A solid one.

Yeah. Take a hundred something points of lethal damage um all right once night falls we make our move do you know anything about the layout of this this camp coin do i, I would think you probably have a good sense. I think I would know the basic layout of it. Yeah, so yeah, a bit. All right. So, Art, we have to find a way to gather some intelligence about where our weapons might be. might be. A painfully thin, gray-skinned

giant that you don't recognize walks through the crowd and stands right near the cages. As he does so, he raises a wooden staff into the air and the giants nearby all

turn and stop yelling and so the giants behind them turn and turn and turn and then they all silence themselves. You can still hear noise in the distance, which lets you know how sizable this giant camp is, that you see hundreds and hundreds, and the ones beyond that can't even see what's happening in this circle of cages.

The thin giant lowers his staff and speaks. Stand and bear witness. Six interlopers have trespassed on our domain. The domain of King Tyterion.

And the domain of Volstis, the Storm Tyrant. In unison, hundreds of giants slam their weapons into the ground at the mention of Volstis' name. They have sullied Ashpeak and murdered your brothers and sisters. Your sons and daughters, and no doubt had designs on assassinating our beloved king and queen as well. He waits for the crowd to come down. A true performer. In the great war that is to come,

the armies of the all-powerful Volstus Huth shall conquer all of Galarian. holding land and titles that once belonged only to the inferior races that have looked down upon us for time immemorial. They look down on us.

Their time in this world has ended. All of this land which is rightfully ours will be ours once again we will tear down castle walls stomp out all of the small folk

in our path and turn their cities to dust no one shall stand in our way he turns to the cages and looks at all four of you on behalf of Tytarian He turns to the cages and looks at all four of you. On behalf of Tytarian, of Clan Brandrick, the first of his name, King of Ashpeak and Supreme Ruler of the Volcano,

you have been sentenced to death. Cheers rise up among the crowd that shake your insides while also making you feel nauseous. This rumble inside of you. He turns back to the crowd. Who among you future rulers of the world shall carry out the sentence? Let it be me. An ogre steps forward from the crowd, covered in scars. He's missing half his nose, and one side of his head is perfectly sloped and bereft of hair,

as if an enormous blade just sliced off a clean part of his skull. On his breastplate is a red bear facing forward on a black background. I, Ragnog of Clan Osvarn, shall carry out the judgment. Line them up and I'll slice them in twain with one fell swoop of my greataxe. And with that, in one motion, he draws the greataxe

a size of a wagon from his back and just spins in place, swinging the blade as he does. The whole crowd takes a swoop step back. A powerful deep woman voice comes up. Nay, I shall carry out the execution. A female fire giant, draped head to toe and full plate, steps forward. She carries a long sword and a black shield with an orange raven on it.

I, Nimaldi from Clan Raithin, shall take my time with them, butchering them from head to toe in our queen's name and then burning their entrails as an offering to Zersvatar. The crowd goes nuts at the mention of the fire giant god from this paladin of Zersvatar. paladin of Zersvater. Don't be foolish! I shall do it! Another fire giant steps forward to plead their case when suddenly a voice cuts through the crowd like a cold lightning bolt. They

are mine! mine. The crowd of giants straight ahead of you slowly parts as the sound of hooves approach from the distance. You see that whoever is getting closer, the looks on the faces of the giants turn from grim curiosity to fear

as an animal breaks into the clearing with the lower body of a horse and the upper body of a man. To make matters worse, this horseman is missing his head. A head that you can see is being held in the hands of this now very recognizable creature. But what's more startling is the rider astride the Savatharim, who looks at all of you with cold, steely eyes as she dismounts. No. With skin barely clinging to her still impressive frame. It's Skir-Ka.

And we'll see you next week. Jesus Christ! I got chills all over, man! Oh my goodness! Well, as soon as night falls, we'll get out of this one. You're fine. Fine. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Glass Cannon Network production

and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission.