The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 269 - Die, Robot

Episode Date: March 16, 2021

The battle with the piscodaemons and their chained dagger wielding summoner continues! For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Last week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. Metro, you see in the back of the room an invisible creature. Invisible enemies attack the heroes. It's the craziest looking creature that you did not expect to see in this castle. Its body looks to be completely made of iron or metal. It's got a shapely feminine form to it. And as Joe mentioned, its wrists are pierced by chains that end in curved blades. It looks like a fucking robot.

Putting the Deathbringer in a desperate position. But first, it will attempt a free grab with its juicy claw. I think I got you, buddy. 38 against CMD. CMD 37. Yikes! A risky, buddy. 38 against CMD. CMD 37. Yikes! A risky magical maneuver may have bought them time. I'll be right back. I need to go get Dalgrif.

She will back up 30 feet and then she will enact her Shadow Well ability. Assuming Dalgrif is willing to leave. That's fine. Just wanted to make sure. But their new opponent is far from beaten.

It is. Shiny Woman's turn. I bet it is. Hold me closer, Shiny Woman. Watch me kill all of your friends. The adventure continues. How cool is this? Didn't I tell you?

Expect the unexpected in book six. Now. Is there anything better than a fresh new recording? I don't think there is. Wow. Yep. The original quartering is pretty good, usually. It's okay okay but sometimes you have to go back once you go back and record it do it again record it i'm more of a measure twice

quarter once type of guy well that's just smart yeah that's just smart that's uh carpentry 101 joe are you still angry from last week be honest oh yeah oh yeah you were pretty pretty fired up let me ask you this are you mad i know you're mad for a lot of reasons do you feel like you just get yourselves in these situations all the time where it's just like everybody gave him a dog or was it the just that failed role when you wanted to do something cool it became staggered again uh the latter the latter yeah no i mean you expect to get into those situations as a rogue but i have every ability to get out of those situations but every single role mine and yours like nine different roles had to stack up to keep me there i had every ability to get out of there with a

better than 50 50 chance uh and you know you put yourself at a whole ton of risk going in early and that's all fine but i was really excited about my potion and i just was already like basking in the hilarity of what was going to go down and your reactions and the i don't know probably rule complaints but it was going to be spicy and then you know you just get freaking staggered which is the worst condition it just it's just like eliminate creativity immediately that's what it is it cuts you to one action paralyzed is worse but staggers bad yeah paralyzed is just like you know go get a drink enjoy the rest of the episode while your friends play yeah but like yeah staggered it just you know it's just painful it's like you if i could just get

this potion and do this thing that would be really fun but it's like you gotta pull it out and you gotta drink it like those two things this doesn't seem like it should be so odorous and and and i mean failing the save is like i'll take the con damage you know what i mean like sure almost kill me sure hp damage. But it's just limiting playing. Limiting play. It sucks. Three actions in Pathfinder 2E makes it a little bit more palatable. Action, action, action.

You drank it. You got it out. Right. You do kind of little fun stuff every round a bit. Yeah, so that was the thing that frustrated me the most. But, yeah, I mean, thank you. I was looking at it afterwards. Thank you, Stoneskin.

Yeah, I bet. Oh, yeah. It's gone now, right? Nope, I've got 10 points left. Wow. I took... You have been dead three times over. I would be permanently dead were it not for Stoneskin.

It mitigated 110 points of damage. That means I was hit by 11 separate attacks in two rounds well what some of those were constricts yes three rounds constricts yeah but they're separate attacks yeah really they're separate damage rolls at least at least how we rolled them i was really going back and forth about having that pisco come after you uh yeah i don't know why you didn't you know i i started to i said i took a five foot step and I was really going back and forth about having that Pisco come after you. Yeah, I don't know why you didn't. You know, I started to.

I took a five-foot step and I was like, I'm going to go after Baron. I just want to... I was tossing around. Take you out and then whittle down the others or see if I can just get a little... I knew I only had like three or four hit points left, so I just wanted to see if I could get into Baron's HP a little bit. Start to weaken him up, maybe even grab him. Kind of take him out of the fight as well. That would be fun, because I don't think Baron has the escape artist you do. You forgot of the burger constant, which is when a dab grant rolls a 20.

I know, I know. The O'Brien constant was in effect, which is roll threes and have only 15s or higher rolled against you. Right. I should have known. I should have known. Were you extra angry, though, because these were medium-sized creatures? I feel like in some degree, even though your character is a recommended archetype from the player's handbook to fight against giants, you were resigned at least to the fact that giants have crazy high bonuses to CMB, CMB, and you were still getting grappled by these guys.

Oh, yeah. I mean, at that point, it's just the die rolls like that. It's just so frustrating. A lot of people don't care. Matthew's never cared. He's never cared once in his life. He goes, here's what Matthew does.

He rolls a D 20 and it's a failure on this really cool thing you had planned. And he's just like, Oh, fail. Like, I don't understand it as a human being. Like, I don't understand how blood pumps through your veins.

Like, I don't get it. When random chance just strips away your ability to enjoy yourself. I don't get it. It's so funny

because when you were describing, I'm like, that should be the reaction. I know. That's normal, I guess. Yeah, I think that's normal. I can't tell

I'm being insulted or complimented. Well, no, you have to understand, Joe and I are both cursed by this condition called being Irish. And it's like, it affects everything.

And that makes us react that way. It definitely factors into it. I was definitely concerned when I saw Joe afterwards, when he jumped on top of a camera, he started swinging a crowbar down to the windshield. Like it was the end of the, of the, of the smooth criminal video. And then he turned into a leopard And walked off Really weird

Macaulay Culkin showed up Well see what happened though You stayed in there And then Metro came in and snuck you out Oh yeah and now I'm even more angry I'd rather just die Because I deserve it Oh the Catholic is coming up now.

Yeah, this is my mother talking now. This is my mother. Because now she swaps in there. Now I'm sure Metra, now I'm sure Metra, Matthew has alluded as we're setting up here that she has a way out, that she has a plan.

She always has a plan and she is a very good escape artist. So that's good. And I suspect that that'll be the case um but immediately what i thought when that switch happened uh all i thought was well okay so now you're in a horrible situation and you're way more important than dogger and i am outside of the cloud by the way the stinging cloud still goes for 1d4 whatever minus one rounds so i just going to be like in the corner. Can't do anything to help anybody. It's just going to suck.

So I didn't like that part either. That part imitates real life. Yeah. Well, look. Let me ask you Troy Because I feel like You're in between You hold yourself

To a standard Of which You love getting beat down You love failing And losing Because you're like I love the challenge I love the creativity

Of not having Everything my character Can do Stripped away from me Until I can do Nothing effective That's When I can really

Think about Who this character is. And, you know, you go on your pulpit about it. But I have seen you slam a few tables in my time about the die rolls. You know what I mean? You haven't hit four rounds in a row. And you're just like, bang! You know what I mean?

It gets to you. So, like, what is it? Is it the randomness of it? What bothers you in that point? Because you're a person that enjoys the struggle of failure. Yeah, I think it's when you just, especially when there's a long time between turns, it finally comes around to you

and there's only one thing you can do. It's like, ah, I've got to wait another 10 minutes. I'm more upset that I have to wait another 10 minutes to try again than that I missed. That is the real thing. Especially at high-level play. Right, and that's what you were talking about real thing. Yeah. Especially at high-level play. Right. And that's what we were talking about after last week is how amplified it is at high-level play.

It's like, it's so long between turns. It is forever. Even with, we only have four players. Yeah. And there's only three enemies in this fight. This isn't like a ridiculous raging combat, but it just takes forever because of how intricate everybody's abilities are yeah

i've been breaking it up a little too much lately but that struggling against failure thing reminds me of demon souls and the reason why i finally beat a souls game was because of the load times on the ps5 instead of waiting 35 seconds on a screen and just stewing in the anger of being murdered for the 20th time you're just like back in it and that's what let me like power through because that's a good analogy i don't mind failing i mind failing and then not being able to prove myself yeah having to dwell on it for a long time yeah yeah you said it that was it because i thought this was a fun idea and i thought everybody'd be like that war that's how that works oh that's so cool uh and then you know and so instead it's just like

oh yeah dog didn't do anything he just sat there just got his ass handed to him and then metro had to come save him you know it's like no no give me another shot give me another shot i'm rolling for how long you're gonna be nauseated three more rounds wait i was never nauseated so is it that oh that's you know that's a good point so it's 1d4 plus one rounds after the condition lasts as long as the creature is in the cloud yeah you know but only if you fail yeah i thought maybe you just had to still pass a check each round after the cloud because it was like lingering in your nose no you're good any creature that sees on a save but remains in the cloud must continue to save but uh if you were nauseated and got out of there, it just keeps going,

which it's a pretty cool spell. You know, for a third-level spell, it really makes things chunky, especially when you add in the fog cloud part of it, the fact that it throws in that concealment. It really puts you in a bad position because you were surrounded, and they couldn't get to you with their ranged attacks. Nestorope. I thought about dropping Stinking Cloud in the surprise round,

but I'm like, you know what? No. This is where my balance comes into play. I'm going to'm gonna do it on the first round if i had done that in the first round nester wouldn't even have got those shots off really yeah thanks yeah um but you know that's part of uh tactical play is figuring out as you go let's just jump right back in because you know we see how these combats go. They take a little bit of time. It is the Robo-Woman's turn. I keep saying robot, but she does kind of look like a cool-ass robot. She looks like... Do you guys know Rom the Space Knight? The old Marvel Comics character?

It sounds... Let me see. Rom the Space Knight. It sounds so familiar. I think it was a Hasbro character initially, and Marvel had the comic rights to him. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah. And then they kind of, they lost the rights. He couldn't be incorporated into the bigger Marvel universe for a while.

Now he's at IDW for a while. And he really, one of my favorite characters, he looks like Rom's sister. Or she looks like Rom's, the Space Knight's sister. Doesn't she look like she doesn't belong in Pathfinder? No, she doesn't. No. Truly. She looks like a comic book character. She is a Has, she doesn't. No, truly. She looks like

a comic book character. She is a Hasbro product. I love the eyes. Very, very cool. Yeah. Anyways, it's her turn and she is going to go invisible.

I can still see her. You can. Oh, that's right. Well, too bad she's in the fog of war. That's true. All right, yeah, you see that she has moved to the back of the room. She actually couldn't, right, in the fog cloud.

Oh, yeah, I can see her. More than five feet. I can see her move. You see her move. Move away. Now I'm going to change where she is. Ha, you don't know. You think you know everything, Metro.

All right, so she is invisible. She is gone. It is a new round. It is Baron's turn. Okay, Baron is going to move 30 feet back, and we'll ready an action, I think. 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. Oh, no. 30 feet back, and then we'll cast Cure Serious Wounds on Dal.

Whoa, there we go. Cure Serious. Eighth level Inquisitor. 98 plus 9. And that resets Stone Skin, which is great. Amazing how it does that. It's an Inquisitor ability. Yep, brother. Look it up.

You have to get to 15th. Unlock it. That is 18 points of healing. Oh, awesome, dude. Thank you. No problem. I want it to be like Final Fantasy Tactics. You have to have seven levels of gunslinger and eight levels of inquisitor. Then you unlock stoneskin heal.

Yeah, it's like a job system, finally. Yeah, the mathematician or whatever it is. Yeah, the calculator. Yeah. All right. That should take care of your bleed, too. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No more 2d6 bleed.

It will not take care of your poison, unfortunately, which is still coursing through your veins for X more rounds. It is Nestor's turn. Nestor, same shitty position you were in in the last round. Yeah. Yeah, still can't really do anything. See, I don't, part of me wants to move up, so I'd be in a position to start to be cleared.

I have clear shots against these things if the cloud ever goes away, but then I would be in the effect of the trap as well. So I'm just going to stay where I am. Just going to stay where you are. I'm sorry. Add another three points of healing to that that because I was treating it like all the Cure Series potions I'd trusted in the past. It is a plus eight. Maximum of fifteen.

Nice. Alright. It is Dalgryth's turn. Dalgryth, I need a save on the poison. This is your fourth save if you're following along at home. And my fortitude has now gone down from the poison. From the con down.

Really unfair. Incredibly unfair. 20 again. 20 again. You are staggered and you will take two more points of con damage. Jesus Christ. Can I ask a medic? It's 1d2.

Medic. It's 1d2, and you took another two, so that's five con. You're down. At zero con, you are permanently dead. Would a touch of law help you pass these checks? Should I use my turn next time to make sure all the d20s you roll are 11s,

or would that not be tough? I'm sure it would. I mean, well, it's 23. It's a much better chance. I'm just not sure if you kept track of what the dc was would 23 pass for you i don't know but maybe the 24 passed i'm pretty sure it was 24 if you want me let's think about it and if when it gets around to my turn i'll cast i'll use my action to uh give you touch of law what do you want to do only if you can't shoot those guys

if you can shoot them then do that yeah if they, if they're visible, I'll shoot them. But if they're invisible, I'll give it to you. All right. What do you want to do, Mick Stagger? I'm going to sheathe the potion from my round. That provokes some bear. I know he only has one. You didn't take that feat.

You should have taken the feat. Yeah, I'm just going to sheathe the potion. What the fuck else am I going to do? Yeah. It's Mick Stagger because you're irish in this in this cloud okay that's all you got that's all i've taken you out of book six yeah uh but four out of x rounds of poison that's's another fail. Uh, man. Okay. Let's keep popping and locking here. Pisco Damon 1,

who was Matt Damon, is dead. Pisco Damon 2 is next to Incorporeal Jones. Uh, okay. All right. Can't attack you.

You're Incorporeal. You can attack me. Well, it's not going to do anything. You have magical... Are your claws magical? Your claws are magical. Um... No.

No, they can't. They can't... I'm trying to see if there's anything they can actually do to you besides that stinking cloud which left her roll on. Oh, it'd be so great if you were just invisible, 50% mischance. I am visible. Yeah, but you're fucking..., 50% missed chance. I am visible. Yeah, but you're fucking... You know what you are. Yeah, but

you're fucking... Mr. Big Stuff. Mr. Big Stuff, who do you think you are? All right. Shit, you guys are far away. Okay. So far away. Okay. So far away.

And if I stay in place anymore. All right, it is going to cast a spell. Does it provoke? Because I'm with five feet. It would provoke, but what would I get you with? You can't even. I don't have a weapon. I just want to be honest.

So, yeah. That's right. You're incorporeal. So it just casts something, and yeah, that's what it does. Don't worry about it. Moving right along, I think it is Metra before my other friend. So, Metra, what do you want to do? Metra is going to double move out of the club.

Double move. Back to where it's her friends. Okay, first I need you to roll a save to see if you can do that, because you started your round in the stink. No, no, no. Corporeal. What's a 50% chance? Oh, yeah, you gotta roll your incorporeal. Alright, alright. Don't you raise your voice to me.

Here we go. Uh, 44. Oh! Boo! Yeah! I do apologize. Yeah! Double move. She moonwalks out of the cloud. Metro walks backwards out of the cloud through Baron to be back with Baron, Dogwraith, and Nestor. Wow, that's far. Okay.

Double move. Double move. Double move. Okay. Very good. Baron, you experience a strange sensation as Metro just passes through. Oh, my God. Okay. Wasn't god. Okay.

Wasn't expecting that either. Alright, it is Robocop's turn. She went invisible again. Hmm. Hmm. Do we get to see a flashback where she was almost killed while in the line of duty and then got her body? Does that happen? No.

I like it! Alright, this is what happens, Metru. You see her materialize right next to Nestor, still invisible. Whoa! So does Baron, by the way. Baron, you have seen Invisible? So you and Baron see her just teleport.

And she is invisible and now right next to Nestor. Oh, dear. So out of thin air, she popped up. She popped up. Yep. Wow. Yep. That's what happened.

GM does whatever he feels like. That's what happened. She does whatever he feels like. That's what happened. She teleported. She teleported over there. Yeah, you said it. I just want to make sure that I don't have to roll on that. Wait a minute. You do.

You do. You do. Roll the 100, Troy. It says there's no chance you arrive off target. Oh, you used Dimension Door? Oh, sorry. It's greater teleport. You wouldn't understand. You wouldn Teleport. You wouldn't understand.

You wouldn't understand. You wouldn't understand. Greater Teleport! Okay. Wow. And you can do that with knives in each hand. Interesting. Interesting. Very interesting. I had no idea there were no somatic components to Greater Teleport.

Don't worry about her. She's cool. I'll send you her character sheet later. Where does she appear next? Book four. It's my back of time. She killed Nestor before he killed Eurotosh. Oh, man. That'd be so messed up.

Baron's turn. Baron, you see her. She's invisible, but you can see her. She's invisible, but you can see her. I can see her. I can see her. And... I think that still would be a 50% mischance, and you're shooting through Nestor. I can see her.

So why would there still be a mischance? No mischance. No mischance if you can see invisible? No. You can see. What is the cover situation we're talking about? What kind of bonus is she getting if I'm shooting through my... Let's talk bones.

Plus four. Let's talk bones. Plus four. I like that. I like that. But I'm going to like it even more when I assure that it is a rapid shot clustered shots all at the same time.

So here comes a full attack action. Beautiful. Okay. Come on. Papa needs a new parachute. Papa needs a new spot. That will be a 29 to hit on the first attack.

Hit. Did we identify the subtype of this creature? You did not. Outsider. Outsider. Oh, we did? Okay. Not the subtype, sorry.

I don't know if it's a daemon. Probably not. I think the type is all I need, actually. Yeah, Outsider. Not the subtype, sorry. I don't know if it's a daemon, probably not. I think the type is all I need, actually. Yeah, outsider. That is going to be max damage, 24 points of damage. And if I can use a swift action... Well, it's still the same. Both are outsiders, right?

Both creatures? Yes. Okay, then it's still on. I'll tell you right now, by the way, that doesn't all go through. There is a DR situation. Okay, so that will only apply to the first shot because these are clustered shots. Okay. And then that is an additional five points of damage for Bane.

The second attack is a 30 to hit. Nice. That is a hit. Your DR days are numbered, LaValley. Come on. All of this damage will go through, and we are talking almost max damage, a six, a five, and an eight. That is going to be talking almost max damage. A 6, a 5, and an 8. That is going to be

35 points of damage. Okay, and that all goes through because of this clusterfuck. Uh-huh. Third attack will be a 22 against Touch AC. 22, even with the plus 4, is a hit. Here comes the next round of damage. Another 8 on the 8,

so that is great! That is going to be 30 points of damage on this attack. Okay, and again, this all goes through, right? Correct. And then the final attack. I ask every time. The final attack is a five on the die for a total of a ten. Oh, that's surprising.

I've never heard you roll so low. That is a miss. Well, sometimes you go out with a bang, sometimes you go out with a bang. Sometimes you go out with a... Lit her up. Can you just imagine this creature goes invisible and then teleports across the room and then just all of a sudden this guy just whirls around and is just like bang, bang, bang, bang, bang.

Yeah, I had to separate my knowledge from her knowledge. You know what I mean? Because I understood what was going to happen, but I don't... She doesn't know what you guys know about seeing visibility. In that moment, you didn't know that I was seeing visibility. Remember? We had to remind you. That's true.

You didn't even know. But I'm saying, I should have known that. You acted with such intensity that you forgot. I forgot. You know, I just... He said it, and I was like, my character doesn't know that. So I'm going to play it as if.

So here's the thing, though. Because Nestor can't see her. She appeared behind him. He had no idea. Baron does see her, and he turns and starts shooting for all Nestor knows. Oh, my God. Now's his chance. But Nestor, have you ever seen Baron miss that many times?

Yeah, so that's the thing. After the first shot, he's just like, oh, fuck. I didn't think he was going to go down like this. And he's getting ready to shoot back at Baron. But then it's like, boom, one goes behind his head. Boom, the second one. And he's just like, what? And then he might feel some blood splash on the back of his head

from this other target. So that's when he realizes what's going on, and he's going to take his turn. Okay, it is your turn anyway. So do you want to take the five-foot step to avoid the AOL? Yes. Okay, and then, yeah, just 50% mischief. Yep, slide across.

And I don't think I can do studied target if I can't see this creature. Yes. Okay. And then, yeah, just 50% mischance. Yep, slide across. And I don't think I can do study target if I can't see this creature. That makes sense. So I'll take that bonus away, which is going to make it hard. But I'm going to do rapid shot anyway.

Okay. Did this creature even become visible before the sinking cloud was out? I don't think it did. Yes, it did. It did? Okay.

It became invisible and then went invisible again. Went invisible again, yeah. 31 to hit on the first attack. Give me that 50%. Yes, it did. It did? Okay. It became invisible and then went invisible again. Went invisible again, yeah. 31 to hit on the first attack. Give me that 50%. Miss Charles. Miss Charles. Miss Charles.

66. Oh, that's a hit. 66. So close to the 69. And that is 50 points of damage. Okay, and the same thing again. I'm only taking DR off the first test. Yes, correct.

All right. 50 points of damage. You said 60? 50. 50. 50 points of damage. Second attack is... Children listen to this show.

They shouldn't. Grant, mute his mic. I'm trying to. I think he stuck chewing gum in his fader. That's really unfortunate. I can't do anything. The equivalent of me going, ah! I think 26 is probably a miss, right?

26 is a miss. I don't even worry about the 50% miss chance. Okay, third attack. Please miss again. That is a 26 again. miss okay okay and come on final attack oh 90 16 uh oh that's a 20 27 27 is a miss okay as well okay okay who God, you guys put out a lot of damage when you do hit. That was Nestor's turn. Dalgrith, roll me a save against this poison

as you've taken five points of con damage. Same exact roll. Now it's a 19. Staggered again. Jesus. And you take another two points of con damage. Jesus. This is five rounds.

I mean, this is what they do to you. They make it so that you can't play. Okay, so we can't rest here, but we can't leave here. So I'll just go into the next combat with 80 total hit points, max. That's their goal. That's their goal. Just weeding you out so it's just one on one at the end with a storm tyrant just curl up in the bag of holding with a good book

wait for us to finish the adventure alright can you imagine you are staggered what do you want to do I'm just trying to like resolve his like desire to just close on this uh creature while also trying to figure out like that he feels like he's he can't even attack um so yeah i'm gonna uh i'm gonna roll a 50 5050. He's going to hang back.

You're GMing yourself. Because I don't know what he'd do. Like, I don't know if he knows he's staggered. You know what I mean? Like, in terms of... He gets no benefit from closing except to, I don't know, pressure her. But, so, yeah, he's just going to hold delay. Delay.

Okay. You will delay, and it is the one remaining Pisco Damon's turn. The spell. Johnny Damon? Johnny Damon. The spell he cast was Fly, so he flies over to Baron and does a vital strike. Oh, no. Which I forgot to do on my first attack against you, Doggerth, during the surprise round.

I only did that one. It would have been another 2d6. I hate that you flew and did that correctly, because I was so ready to be like, did that spell require line of sight? You measured like 10 times. 45 feet, and I was like, that son of a gun is casting a ray on me, and I'm going to ask him how he can

see out of stinking cloud. He can't do it! I hate that you guys can see me measuring, because it just gives everything away. I hate that you can see us measuring. I know. That's part of the game. I'm a good shot. All right, here we go. One claw. Vital strike.

Let me make sure my fucking... I'm not... Where's my... I think I still have grappled on. I think Baron is still just like in the process, even though it's a free action, of just like loading in the final alchemical paper cartridge into his gun and click it open and this thing flies out of nowhere and he looks up flying lobster man

and baron stares into its eyes and makes it flinch. Natural three. Yeah. I mean, I didn't roll anything less than a 15 against Joe. Natural three. Could have been so great. Again, could have been so great. Grabs him, bleeds him, takes him out of the fight. Instead he's fine and that is his round. Dog Wraith will go. Okay. The creature goes over

and says, get away from Pudge, you son of a bitch! And he's going to take a five foot step and attack this guy. Okay. So, boop, boop, and he'll stab him once. Oh, yeah, because you're staggered, so you can still take that five-foot step. Exactly. Nice.

That's why the delay was key. All right. Still feeling pretty bad inside. Not great. Not great inside. Here we go. So, this is going to be a... Ooh, critical threat! Pretty bad inside. Not great. Not great inside. Here we go. This is going to be a... Ooh, critical threat!

Oh, yeah! Baby! There we go. Natty 19, critical threat. Critical threat! Critical threat! Can he confirm it? Natty 17!

That is a 37 to hit. That is a confirmed crit. Yeah! Fantastic. The damage isn't going to be that great, but let's see if we get something juicy. Juicy might be all you need. There you go, Dahlkrath. There you go.

All right. Michelle from Norfolk, Virginia. Oh, just roll a natural 20. Just a five. God, that would have been great. Third time strikes true. Your weapon strikes the target's weakest point with impeccable strength and precision. Roll another confirmation roll at your highest BAB.

If you confirm again, triple damage. And the damage bypasses any DR the target has. What? Sorry. This creature has not been hit yet. If you do not confirm, double damage. Okay, so one more confirmation roll. 30?

30 is the confirmation. Yes! Triple damage! Triple damage! And it bypasses DR. And it bypasses DR. Wow, that's huge. Fantastic. Yeah, I don't think you have any precision damage there, so don't triple that. I am not.

Really, the triple damage ends up being an extra 2d6. I'm sorry, I raised my voice. It's all good. It's all good. Here we go. That is 26 points of damage. 26 points of damage, and the creature

is starting to bleed. Bleed blue blood. Yep, so it all goes through. Yeah, so it all goes through. Yeah, so it all goes through. Yep, that is correct. Awesome. Wow. All right.

All right. Nice work, Michelle. Thank you. It's going to be your week, O'Brien. Turn it around. It is Metro's turn. Okay, Metro will whirl around and point her finger at the robot man. Woman.

Robot woman. And. Look at her. Look at her! Look at her! Okay. I'm gonna cast Disintegrate on you. There we go. Okay, that is

25 against Touch. Okay, just relax there, Johnny Disintegrate. 27 against Touch. 25. What kind of effect is Disintegrate 27 against touch 25 What kind of effect is Disintegrate? Transmutation

Okay Turning one thing into another Turning a robot into a pile of dust Okay, it's not a death effect Nope Alright, roll spell resistance You roll spell resistance You roll spell resistance.

You roll it. Oh, tweener 26. Oh, no. You got it exactly. Amazing. All right. So what's the save? Fortitude. All right.

Okay. Please fail. Natural one. Oh, my God. I should do a natural natural one I got 32 you fail no I'm kidding you're fine whoa okay so instead you take 5d6

fucking 5 it could have been 30d6 if I one time just one time has it ever popped once right it pops like once yeah it's gonna happen though this is what the story is finally disintegrate hits

almost all time I will say it next week It happens like once. Yeah. It's going to happen, though. This is what the story is. Finally, Disintegrate hits. Oh, that's so terrible, Zanex, man! That's how you end the episode. 24-minute episode. That was awesome. All right, you take 12 points of damage. That's not a good roll on 5d6. No. And does that bypass DR?

Yes, it should. It's energy damage, so yeah. It's energy damage. Is negative energy damage disintegrate? Acid? I'm trying to look. It just says 2d6 points of damage per caster level. Untyped.

Untyped. Dreaded untyped. It's a thin green ray. You'd think, right? It must be a creature that's a ray. Sounds like energy. Yeah, it should be energy, right? It must be a creature that's a ray. Sounds like energy. Yeah, it should be energy, right? The ray affects even objects constructed entirely of force.

So, yeah, I'm going to say it all goes through. Okay, it's only 12 points of damage. I'm not too worried about it. Here's what's going to happen now. She is going... He always does that to you. I'm not finished. And then he waits for you to acknowledge that you know he's not finished.

You make a tune. Can we, by the way, just take a moment? The number of times he's corrected our grammar. People aren't done, they're finished. You just said you were done. You use incorrect grammar. I'm not done. And you take a minute.

You're not correct. Because you can't be. Who's incorrect grammar. I'm not done. And you take a... You're not correct. Because you can't be. Who's on first? I wish there were... Are you finished, Grant? I wish there were fewer of us. Glad we got that on the recording. Metro is like a five-foot step to stand behind

Dalgrif. It really hurt my ears. Dalgrif? Talk about a stinking cloud. All right. Now are you done? Finished? Apparently I am nothing.

You're nothing. Grant would prefer I be nothing. Oh, no. Matthew, Matthew. Oh, no. You're only nothing to Grant. Technically, Grant, done is fine because when I say I, I'm actually referring to my turn. Oh, really?

My turn can be done. Well, now it's his I's turn. When you're saying I'm, you're referring to your turn? That's pretty loose and fast, I'd say. Just as if I'm saying when I say I, sometimes in this game I'm referring to Metro. Okay. Oh my God. He's so God

extended. He doesn't have to. He's simply applying situational rules when he cares to and only applying them to others and not himself. But let's continue. Isn't that what makes applying situational rules when he cares to. And only applying them to others and not himself. But let's continue. Isn't that what makes him situational? It's your turn. It's my turn.

It's I's turn. It's I's turn. I'm not done finished. No, wait. When you say I'm, do you mean you're round? Or do you mean you as a GM? It's Robocop's turn. Robocop.

She takes a five foot step towards Nestor Coin and is going to unleash five attacks. Oh no. That's a lot. She's got these chained daggers

and she's just like shush shush shush five comes up with the other hand. shush shush shush five shush shush shush five

What's she saying five out loud? But you don't understand her tongue so she's just like shush shush shush five and She's saying five out loud. But you don't understand her tongue. She's like, shush, shush, shush, shush! That's five in outsider lingo. I'm an outsider.

If you guys were hip to the outsider lingo, you'd know. Then you heard five. I heard five. You heard five. She was a very angry five. Here we go. Five attacks. I guarantee,

I guarantee a crit. Wow! He's pointing to the fences. What happens if you don't get one? I don't get a ball. Here we go. There should be some stakes here.

If you don't get a crit, Nester automatically confirmed you get the crit and all the damage. But why do I have to lose something? Because I called my shot? Yeah. No, there should be real steaks. Yeah. If this doesn't happen, you have to buy us all steaks from Christos, the Greek steakhouse. Real steaks.

Real steaks. Real steaks. No, there should be real steaks. If you don't crit, you need to buy us all steaks. That joke was bottle cap worthy. Yeah. But you only get it if I don't crit, you need to buy us all steaks. That joke was bottle cap worthy. Yeah. But you only get it if I don't crit. Okay.

All right. I'll live with it. I'll live with it. I feel like Steve's being punished for being funny. Oh, my God. So now it's like, if you do something amazing, Troy's going to be like, all right, roll for a bottle cap. That's what I should have done when I changed the bottle cap.

You know, that was cap worthy. Go ahead and give me a D100. On a 96 or higher, you get a cap. All right, 69, you get two caps. Here we go. Chain dagger, five attacks, guaranteed crit. First attack. Okay, not a crit.

Pretty damn close, though. You said your AC is what, 26? 26, yeah Alright, so she's gonna hit a lot Yeah Alright, so first attack does 12 points of damage Plus bleed we'll deal with later Second attack, not a crit, is a hit

Does 15 points of damage You're just bleeding. Third attack. Is this going to be the crit? Oh, third attack misses, actually. Oh, very good. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought that was a 17.

No, that is a... Hands off the chest piece, unfortunately. That's a 27. Yeah, it's a hit. Okay, so third one barely hits. And that's going to be 14 points of damage. So just chip, chip, chip. Fourth attack.

Still no crit. That's a 27 as well. Two points. So close to the stakes. And two points. So close to the stakes. Another 12 points of damage. I'm getting hungry.

12 points of damage. Last attack. Salivating. Last attack. Come on. I can smell the steak. I can smell him. getting hungry 12 points of damage last attack salivating last attack come on I can smell the steak I can smell them critical

critical what is it called threat critical threat no way she crit 17 to 20 and I rolled a natty 18 that's why

he saw us to confirm it to get out of the steak thing did I guarantee a crit or a threat you guaranteed a crit I couldn't think of the word threat alright oh I should confirm right unless I guarantee a crit or a threat? Yeah, you guaranteed a crit. I couldn't think of the word threat. Alright. Oh, I should crit, right? Unless I roll

a natural one. Yeah, 37. Good thing I crit! Now you owe me a mistake. Oh no. This is a named character. Oh no, should we go to the list? Let's see which of you from the niche can finally kill Nestor.

Will it be Brooke? Of course you had to crit on the last attack to keep the suspense going brooke from virginia beach wow virginia all over the place today all over the map yeah primal blood lust oh blood that's good your eyes glow with fury and you feel a sudden rush of adrenaline coursing through your veins as your target buckles beneath your strikes. Everything fades except for a primal urge to unmake your foes.

Double damage and your damage dice increase by one size for the next 1d4 round. Whoa. Ugh. Wow. Juicy. Alright, so it's d4 becomes a D6, right? Right. All right.

So it's going to be D6 is four. That's a fun crit for a- Just one round. So just this round. So next round. She'll get an attack through the next round. All right. Here comes the crit damage.

This is pretty good damage here, especially now that it's D6. It's almost box cards. 32 points of damage on that last one. So she hit on five attacks, was doing an average of like 1340 points of damage, and then finishes with a 30-something. Again.

Sha-sha-sha-sha! Five! And he's bleeding. We'll take 2d6 bleed on his turn just confirming you got that right that was double damage that was the highest roll you had oh because you increased

the damage dice yeah because I was like none of your stuff was 16 or 17 the whole time all right yeah it is 1d4 plus x became 2d6 plus x times 2 2x oh yeah by the way while we're accounting i need uh lobster man to take another four points of damage because i only doubled my debt my bonus multiplier i didn't triple my bonus multiplier for that it was so insignificant foolish mistake plus four i will not take the damage. Four more damage.

Let's talk about round six. This is the round that really separates the Nesters from the Metras. It's Baron's turn. Baron, you see Nestor get lit up. This woman is now visible. Yes, and Baron has understood. Well, she's visible now, so Nestor has a better chance. And this creature is in such good shape in front of us.

You know what? Baron's going to split his time. He's going to start a full attack action, and he will change the target of said attack action after a five-foot step, should one of them fall. And he's going to start on the creature that lit up Nestor. So hot. So fast. So furious. Here comes the first attack. Okay, plus four hits AC. Okay, that will be

a 23 to hit. That is a hit. That will be, ooh, nice. That will be 29 points of damage on the first attack. This is the one that will take the DR. Yep. This is the lobster or the robo? This is the robo cop. Misf No, this is the RoboCop.

Misfire. That's a five. That's a five. Can't believe we remembered. Which I think is just a miss. No, it's a 20 to hit. 20 is a hit. Wow, the greatest.

That's amazing. Good crit. That will be 24 points of damage. I can't remember who that was. That was from New Brunswick. New Brunswick, Canada. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Awesome.

The Brunsy. The third attack will be a 22, which is also a hit. It sure is. It was Sean. Sean from New Brunswick, Canada. Good job, Sean. For 29 points of damage. Nice.

Okay, she's in bad shape. Yeah. Final attack. Done! The final attack is a total of an 11 I guess That is a miss Again just peters out on the final shot

Well I'm glad I thought she was closer to death Than she was so I'm glad I Exhausted her a little bit now Nestor can do what I did Which is hopefully finish her off Nestor will start by taking seven points of bleed damage. Nestor, you have stone skin as well, right? So did that just eat up your stone skin all those times?

Much of it, yes. But a lot of it didn't get through. Yeah, well, the crit. Yeah, the crit. The crit was 27 got through. Yeah, that's tough. Right, so you just have like a pool of 10 dr that just kept going chip chip chip chip chip yep uh okay it is real lifesaver okay so yeah

nester is like he is incensed that being carved up by this person thing so it takes a it takes a quick five foot step back and it's just like now now it's my turn. And boom, just unleashes a steady target swift action. First attack is a 32. 32 to hit. 32 is a hit. Okay. 47 points of damage. And you kill her.

Yes! Man, I want to know what her deal was. I want to know what her deal was. I want to know what her name was. You still have attacks because that was only your first attack. Yes, and you've got the rapid shot. Now, can you still... The creature goes away. If it's a summoned creature, right?

If the summoner is killed, I think the summoned creature goes away. What I'm seeing here is that it's rounds per level. It's based on the duration, not on the death of the caster. I feel like there are video games where if you kill the caster, that's enough. I feel like I'm thinking Eidolon. An Eidolon is definitely just summoned if you are unconscious. Yeah, I feel like they would say that in the text of the spell. It's like, if the caster dies...

It's funny, because I know we've run up against this before even in other games but I want to say it sticks around for a good duration tied tightly to the existence and I don't think we have run up against this too too much I don't think we've fucked too many casters that have summoned creatures that we killed the caster

first yeah that's kind of I feel like we must have been like back when we were doing just when Skid was running us through Pathfinder Society games remember we did record those first. Yeah. That's kind of I feel like we must have been like back when we were doing just home when Skid was running us through Pathfinder Society games remember? Oh yeah.

We did record those. You know how many rules we were getting wrong? Yeah. You know what

we need to do though? We need to run checks to see if creatures are summoned and if they are evil because that makes

protection from evil very useful again. Oh yeah. If we could have had that if Dogger had that going in completely

fine. Right. Yeah we should have. I mean it makes sense for you going to a demonic symbol that we would have cast that oh yeah if we could have had that if dogger had that going in completely fine right yeah we should have let me make sense for you going to a demonic symbol that we would have cast that on you if we were good at this yes if we were good at this game yeah uh we've never promised that all right now we're nester you started off with a cluster shot right yeah can you then turn that to another creature with no penalties or anything uh i believe so yeah it would just be the next, the first shot against this new creature, the DR would be taken away normally, and then

the rest of the shots would be... Oh, actually, you know what? I don't know that that's true. Not strictly by the wording of the... It says you pick a single target. Well, it says when you use a full attack action to make multiple ranged weapon attacks against the same opponent,

total the damage from all hits before applying that opponent's damage reduction. Yeah, but that's fine. You're still using a full attack. And it's still multiple attacks against one opponent. Right. Yeah, that's true. Okay. Yeah, that's one of those ones you can be like, well, let's talk about this.

Let's just keep going. Okay. First attack against this thing. 28. 28. 28 against this dude is a hit. Hit-alicious. Is it a clean shot? Yeah, you've got a clean shot.

Yep, you're good. That is 27 points of damage, three of which is electricity. Okay, great. 27 points of damage, three of which is electricity. Okay. Great, so this is the one that DR will eat, but all of the electricity resistance will come into play. Right. Okay. Second attack on the lobster.

That is a 32 to hit. 32 to hit! Beautiful. Oh. 21 points of damage, two points of which is electricity. Okay, two, he's a hit! Beautiful. Oh, uh, 21 points of damage, two points of which is electricity. Okay, so all 19 get through. And final attack.

Uh, natural 20. Oh! There it is! There it is. Fills him off. Lowest chance to confirm. Will he do it? Let's see. I do get the critical focus on this. Ooh! He has critical focus, too, by the way. He he do it? Let's see. I do get the critical focus on this. It's clutch. Ooh.

Let's see. He has critical focus, too, by the way. He does? Yeah. Oh, that's cool. That's a 33. 33 to confirm. That is confirmed. With the critical focus.

Oh, that's so big. That's good. Critical. Critical. All right. All right. This one from Yehuda in Ottawa, Ontario. Yehuda. Ottawa, Ontario.

Bard's Black Arrow. Oh, nice. You strike a vital unprotected spot on your target, inflicting extreme damage. Triple damage, fortitude save for double damage. So that's quadruple damage, fortitude save for triple damage. And the fortitude save is against 33, right? Yeah. That was your confirmation roll?

Yes. I don't know if I can... Oh, no, I can make it. It's a very, very hard roll. I'll tell you right now, I have to roll a 19 or higher. Wow. 18. Oh! 32 total.

Okay. All right. Quadruple. Damage! What's Bard's Black Arrow? Do you know the reference? Yeah, that's The Hobbit That's Bard's Arrow that he shoots smog with

Go now and speed well It's been too long And I never watched that third movie They're fun, they're not as good as the first ones But they're fun That's 95 points of damage That is 11 points of damage. Oh! Oh! Uh, uh, do-do-do-do-do-do. That is 11 points of which is electricity.

95 minus 11 is 84. And he had 74. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha Black arrow strikes! Yes! Amazing. And the foes lie dead in the halls of Iron Cloud Keep. Well, that was, is it? The stinking cloud

remains, though, right? Yeah, I just fast-forwarded through time and had the stinking cloud disappear. Otherwise, gonna have to roll some saves yes you know you would know that just covering the symbol can be enough to not have to worry about it so i will say now that you have time you can send dalgryth in and see what happens well dalgryth and baron are still immune we both saved and we haven't left the area so i don't see why we can't both go. Oh, maybe we have left the area. No, you're probably good.

Not sure. Oh, did we leave it? I might have. It's 60 feet. It seems like I might have. No, Dalgrith hasn't left. Oh, great. Dalgrith hasn't left.

Neither has Baron. Oh, you know what? Dalgrith did leave because I moved him out of it. Oh, because you were out of it, right? Oh, yeah. That would make sense. Am I still in it, or do I need to reset it? No, you're good, Baron. Okay, great. um so baron maybe you want to go up there baron walks

into the center of the star like torello instead one once upon a time for the san francisco 49ers against the dallas cowboys uh and peas on the star um no he'll look around the room or you know what in his gear let's see there's probably they have bedrolls and stuff yeah they'll put that down yeah i'm not gonna rake you over the coals uh i'll say that you're able to pull something out um and fashion a way to cover this symbol and that neutralizes it um so the rest of you can enter the room if you so choose just been uh it's been a episode so i'll tell you again what's in here big steel table with a chair chair and a giant kiln that is active. There is something cooking in there, you'd think. Massive anvil, several metal boxes, huge cabinet with stained glass doors stretching across the back wall.

Hold on a minute. I think we need the stand initiative. Because I'm slowly dying. Oh, yeah. I think we need to stay in initiative. Because I'm slowly dying. Oh, yeah. I'll tell you right now. You rolled five out of six consecutive rounds. So give me your final roll.

Do you want touch of law? Let me see it. If we stayed in initiative, that was Nestor, and then it was going to be Dalgrit. So you actually can't get touch of law. Okay. Staying in initiative would be Dalgrit. Oh, that'll probably do it, I think. That's 24.

24, and you save on that. You need two consecutive saves, but since that was the sixth round, you're fine. You come out of it fine with just, what, seven points of content? Only seven points. It's all right. Baron. We have scrolls of... You have scrolls of Lesser Restoration, do you not? Yeah, I do.

We have a wand of Lesser Restoration with 25 charges. We are so smart! Top me off, brother. I'm feeling a bit weak. So that's 1d4 per casting. 1d4 per casting. Let me just... Just give me two fours and we out.

Can I hit it and quit? That is a one on the first one. Nestor, do you move into the room? Three on the second one. I'm going to take my potion of cure serious to stop my bleeding and get some healing in there. Smart. So we used four charges off the lesser restoration wand.

Great. And Nestor, it would have come back to you I guess it would have come back to you to take 2d6 more bleed, but I'm not gonna go crazy with that. Because Metro could easily have healed you as well. Or administered. I'm sure there's a way to figure it out.

Okay, so you do that, and then do you slide in the room? Yes. Okay. So all of you are in this workshop, or whatever the hell it is um and then can you heal me up do we have a wand we do have we have three wands okay we can cover it later i'm just gonna i'm gonna get healed up to full i'm only down 30 okay but both you and nester have had your stone skin um whittled away, I've only got one hit left. I can block one more hit. I actually really enjoyed that combat. I know

it was a little tricky and I just like the way it played out. I think it was fun for the rest of us, except Joe. Yeah, I had fun. Yeah. I would have had a lot of fun if it wasn't for that. Tiger condition! Do you want to tell us what would have happened? No. Because now it's going to seem lame. Yeah, you know what? I will

tell you. It is a potion that I've held since character creation that is a low level uninteresting potion called potion of gaseous form oh but if i drink it there you essentially become gas you know like like the gas around it and you are immune to poison you have dr10 magic and something is like the only thing they can get through it uh and i could have told and you can't like grapple the creature really you know what i mean uh and so i could have just like just gotten out of there and he's been on my sheet since creation i've never used it and i was just like this would be so fun you should use it against volstice have him breathe you in and then ant-man inside of his lungs exploding him from the inside yeah a couple cool things uh one thing teleport only has verbal components so even with the daggers in her oh so

it doesn't matter wow uh second it was so smart that you went in corporeal instead of anything else because she had true seeing oh so you could have gone on the ethereal plane and she could see you wow visible i was like oh somebody's gonna go invisible or greater invisibility wasted if you guys have you know because oftentimes you when you approach combat it's like let's make nester and dog with invisible she can see you teleport up to you and just you saw the damage she did but if i'm thinking oh he's gonna go ethereal and you can see ethereal you cannot see incorporeal oh wow that's great she could see it but could she act upon someone basically yeah she can see her anyways but you can't doesn't uh i can get past your mirror images and everything i could have just pinpointed you but i can't get

past incorporeal i can see you so she's not have magical attacks uh yeah i mean her her her whatchamacallit her her her daggers uh right now they're not magical but when she was wielding them they were i could have got past but 50 damage i just didn't feel like really doing that can we check her body first before we do anything i feel like yeah so uh the summoned creatures don't worry about them next next her plucks his many shotshot arrows, the two arrows, out of her face. Puts it back in as many as an ever-flowing quiver. She has two chained daggers. They were plus two daggers to her, but now that she has passed,

they are just regular mundane chained daggers. The cool thing about chained daggers, you can chain them to your wrists and use them as a ranged weapon. And they, I don't know if they return to you or it's just like you throw it and then you can pull it back. Cool. That's like some Soul Calibur stuff. The Soul Still Burns. Soul Still Burns.

Cervantes versus Ivy. It was Ivy. It's an Ivy stuff. She has no items on her and no armor. Does she have a driver's license so we can know her name? Yoshimitsu wins. Sorry. I'm sorry.

You open up her wallet and the license is missing. Oh, no. Therein lies the mystery of book six. What about an AARP card? The name is rubbed out. She's off the grid. I am timeless. Video store rental card?

Everything has the name rubbed out. She was very particular about protecting her identity. She wanted to be off the system. She's like, I just want to go to Ironclad Keep and retire. I hope nobody comes in. Wait, who's that coming through the door? Hey, I'm going to summon a couple of Pisco Daemons.

Stay invisible. What do you do? What do you think, Baron? Does everyone feel like we can move forward? I haven't seen a place to find any rest at yet. Wait, is there anything in the cabinet? Oh, and I also want to check the kiln. Baron's

dwarven blacksmithing instincts are keen, and he wants to take out what's ever in there, if he's able to, if he's strong enough, unless it's like a giant-sized thing. I'm going to open up the kiln. Yeah. It's got to pique your curiosity. And I'll detect magic on the inside before opening it. Detect magic on the inside.

And around the room. And around the room. Let's see what's in here. There is magic emanating from the room. And around the room. Let's see what's in here. There is magic emanating from the floor, obviously. One thing that you see when looking around, because, Metro, you said you were looking around. Yeah, I eventually want to go to the cabinet. Okay. So, Metro, you're going over to the cabinet while you detect magic.

You don't detect any other magic in the room, Baron. Let me just make sure that's correct. Over near the cabinet. Yep, that's not magical. I'll tell you about that in a second. I'll tell you about that non-magical stuff in a second, Matthew. But, yeah. So, what do you do?

Near Baron. Baron. Baron will open the kiln to look what's inside. Baron opens the kiln and you see a thin strand of hair laying there and suddenly the hair goes

BOOM! And explodes outward spraying shards on all of you. Roll a reflex save. Everybody. Oh dear. Ugh, everybody. Oh, dear. Ugh. I missed that. I was, like, trying to see if the hair was magical so you could detect that, and it wasn't.

Okay. I'm assuming a 15 fails. It does. So I'm going to use my tattoo to re-roll that. Ooh, yeah. Tattoo you. Deplane, deplane. Tattoo you. Deplane, deplane. Tattoo you, McStagger.

Callback. 20 is what I get on the re-roll. 20 on a re-roll. What did you get, Joe O'Brien? 31. 31. Nestor Coin. 34.

Barron. 30. The three of you pass. You take half damage. We all have evasion, take half damage we all have evasion too do you all have evasion now i don't know baron doesn't know so baron will take half uh nester and dogrith will take zero metra just made it dc 20 on the re-roll 10 d6 fire damage plus 4 d6 slashing oh my god uh do you guys have any uh meaning uh metra and baron do you have any fire uh resistance otherwise i'll just roll 14 d6 you know what i do i believe i do fire fire fire fire i don't think so nope just electricity and cold all right 14 d6 it is halved uh 49 so 25 points of damage 24 we'll say 24 points of damage uh we'll say we'll say are you know at 25

uh yeah you see like a little there was a little metallic hair inside it was probably one of her hairs uh she set it so that once the door was opened, the temperature in the kiln immediately rose to that of molten iron, causing the hair to erupt in a spray of searing metal shards. Wow. It was a mechanical and not a magical trap.

It must be complicated to have hair with that kind of problem, especially when you're hanging out in a forge room. It's magical outsider hair, man. I have magical outsider hair. You don't know! Meanwhile, you're going to the cabinets, Metra. After I heal myself.

After I take some hits off the wall. We're all taking one hit. Should we just open up the cabinets and see what happens? No. We're all taking one hit, so I'll do that off air as far as getting everyone else up. All right. Can I impose upon Dalgrith and or

Nestor to check this cabinet for traps before I look in I got some Mitra never felt better in my life he's gonna come over and check for traps let's say 37 does not appear to be trapped you see actually atop

the cabinet six dozen or so silver plaques stacked on top of the cabinet. You look inside, there's nothing really of interest, uh, inside. Um, but you do see a chest under the long table. the long table. The plaques are these thick, rectangular, like I said, silver plaques are about a foot square, an inch thick, and they're heavy,

about 30 pounds each. If you start looking through them, each one is engraved with astronomical symbols and numbers in giant, for those of you who speak giant. If you take a second to go through them, they're numbered 1 through 72 the chest under the table roll perception to see if it's trapped i'm assuming you're not just going to pop open a chest it's not trapped don't worry uh it contains 20

bars of pure silver oh they weigh about 100 pounds each. Whoa. Wow. Anybody have a praise? I do. I've got, I think I've got a, yes, I do. I have a semi-decent of praise. Uh, that's, uh, 18. Nestor, you, your eyes, like dollar signs come out like a Looney Tunes cartoon.

Uh, 20 bars of pure silver, 100 pounds each, worth 10,000 gold pieces. Oh, yeah. Nice. And that... Throw it in the bag. Is what you see. I've always said a wondrous item was worth about 20 pure bars of silver. Always.

Yep. The old saying goes... You've always said that. I always have. Here we go. We almost made a sign to put on the wall of the office. Yeah, I was cross-stitching just to have that hoop on our door. But then it was such a cliche that it's like, we don't want to seem corny.

But then, COVID. Yeah. Let me put a blanket on the symbol. Wow. Can I just also say... It's like a hand towel in the bathroom. It's like a hand towel in a bathroom. Retroactively, the stinking cloud image you found was really cool because it had this skull built into the smoke that was neat

and these particle effects. Yeah, great graphics. I've had some time. Troy, I can't help but notice that from where I'm standing on the map, I'm looking directly up to this passageway to the north. Oh. And I do have 120 feet of dark vision. Interesting.

Well, son of a von Drook, let me tell you what you see. You look up there, and you see that the hall ends about, oh, 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, about 60, 70 feet or so from the beginning of this corridor. It just ends in a wall and looks like it splits off again to the east and the west. Dogwrith looks away from the pure silver bars to Nestor and he's just like, if that's what they got in the front room, what do you think they got inside? It's tantalizing, isn't it? Just the possibilities. It is.

Do we think this is the front room? This isn't, or, or is this some sort of like side door? Have to be semantics, Metro. Just making a comment on the bar. You see a concierge come around the corner. Guys, the front door is on the other side. This is for deliveries only. We can't have you on the other side. This is for deliveries only. We can't have you coming in this way.

This is a staff entrance. I'm so sorry. You can't have me walking around. The premier heroes fighting these low CR creatures. Please, please. This way. Can you guys fly? No, I asked because I want to know what we're walking into.

Are we walking into the front defenses or do we sneak in through the actual mini smithy? We didn't even have a convo up top. went straight in through these doors we could have gone in through the air van exhaust places we went in we made decisions there at least were several entrances to this place so yeah it's interesting though getting it's funny you say that what other entrances i mean i imagine if we had if we had we could have flown around the perimeter of this thing i imagine and look for other places yeah yeah there weren't any right here obviously but yeah the tunnel was the only one that i saw outside yeah but you you know you you wisely knew that they had uh they were firing

at you there's no reason i think there's defenses they got flying creatures i think that you made and there might be the same decision your heroes it would have been. People might be expected to arrive like from up top. Like there might be like a main entrance to the castle atop this chunk of land that flies on. A helipad. Yeah. Well, this is what I can't understand. It's like, are we in the castle? I think we're underneath the castle.

I think we're in the castle. Are we not in the castle? Is the castle like some distance away this is impossible to wrap our head around because it was like this huge land mass that we were fighting just underneath the level of the castle i was having a hard time understanding what we were looking so the tunnel because remember how i said that a few episodes ago that it was like rocky base rocky base rocky base castle like it sits flush against the rocky base the tunnel that leading up to these doors was kind of built into the rocky base so it's hard to tell if you are actually in the castle proper or if you're beneath

the castle but we're definitely one or but like castle isn't, we can't be under the castle. We're either under the castle or in it. Yeah, you're either under it. It's not like further away. No, no. We're not moving toward it. Yeah, no, because when you look up, the walls of the castle were right there. You're either under it or in it.

You just, without looking at the blueprints, it's hard to tell exactly where you are. So, yeah, if we're not in the castle proper, we're in the basements or something. Yeah, that's a good way to think about it tunnels all right um oh someone should look at these someone who can read should look at these plaques yeah 1 through 72 oh yeah um well what about them yeah just they have uh who reads giant we all do you yeah. So, Giant numbers 1 through 72, and astronomical symbols engraved all over the different... I don't know if anybody has any sort of training in astronomy. I don't think so.

So, nothing is really like piecing it together. The number 72 doesn't ring a bell. But it's very particular, and there's none missing. You can go through it. One, two, three, four. All 72 are there. They're heavy. They're 30 pounds each.

Is there a check we could roll on the astronomy? What would that be? Now it's nature. I have nature. Yeah, no. I would say nature. I would even say arcana, maybe. All right, I'll roll arcana.

For the nature, I get a 21. For the arcana, I get a 20. I got a 32 arcana. Okay. I can tell you, if you sit there and really study them and think about that, if you sit there and really study them and think about that, that the symbols are related to the stars appearing in the skies of Galarian

near the horizon. Near the horizon. This must be, this is like some sort of navigation tool or something, like some sort of celestial objects to aim towards for the castle itself. Why don't we take them?

Then they won't know where they are. Yeah, then they'll be fucked, won't they? Which way's north? Throw them in the fire. Hell yeah. Set the kiln going.

Burn them. The kiln explodes again. Oh, no! Why'd you open it again? Are they worth anything? Yeah. You think you could probably sell these?

This is like a giant relic. You know? These aren't like artifacts, but they would have value to collectors. You can give me an appraise for that. I'll do that. Ooh, a 20. 20, John. I can tell you they are worth...

I just love the idea that what we're thinking of is selling these to collectors. Like, that's what we're thinking of. Where did you find that? My parents are cleaning out the attic. But when we bring this castle down, or at least convert it to non-evil usage... Hopefully we'll bring it down right into the middle of a taping of Antiques Roadshow. Exactly. I'll read straight out of the book here, because I think it's interesting, especially based on this conversation.

They're worth 150 gold pieces each in raw materials alone or up to five times that to a collector of cloud giant curios. I'm telling you, this guy thought of everything. Okay. So I guess it's a curios or I wonder if we're gonna have to Fly the castle at some point Throw them in the bag Yeah okay That would be kinda cool

If it was like We could Hold on to them Do the navigation Chart the course Yeah yeah If you wanna hold on to them You guys are okay

With all this weight You know Cause these things Are gonna add up I don't know I don't think so Well I don't It's a bag

A bag of holding Is not unlimited I mean it has a No But it's a giant bag of holding And we did clear out a lot of it when we went to yeah nothing to worry about stop the show right now just something to maybe some who wants to volunteer to be on a bag of holding duty just to kind of see where you're at everyone's pointing at grant so as the resident giant sweetums uh you will be in charge of that yeah don't worry i'll

hand wave it i thought you would yeah don't worry i, don't worry. I'll hand wave it. I thought you would. Yeah, don't worry. Don't worry. I've thought about it. I'm going to hand wave it. All right. So 72 30-pound blocks we throw into this bag. Let's just keep moving.

Yeah. Throw it on your shoulder. Strap it to your back. And you keep walking. And then double move. Acrobatics check. Sneak attack. Cartwheel.

I'm through. Let's go. 72. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Cartwheel. I'm through the next corner. Let's go. Oh my gosh. Troy just nagged a piece of the set down. We'll never use you again. What do you want to do? Dalgrith is happy to go ahead if that's what everybody wants.

And begin exploring again. Towards this corridor to the north. That is literally a ton. It's a ton of plates that's down the back of holding. It's no big deal. No big deal. All right, I'm going forward.

Going forward. If I get stuck up there again, Metro, switch places with me. I can only do that twice, two times a day. What? That is a 29 perception for traps on the floor. as he's walking along you look

ahead as you're walking along i'll roll that all the way to the wall you don't see anything okay you also don't hear anything okay he comes extends to the west and to the east. Okay. Any further? I can see 60 feet. I haven't revealed it, but no, there's no change. Okay, so it's just still corridor. I'll go ahead and reveal more to you just for your own edification.

All right. But yeah, it just keeps stretching in either direction. You don't see anything. Metro will peek her head around both corners to see if she can see anything 120 feet away. I thought you would. All right, so to the west, you see that the corridor ends and turns upward okay to the north and then

to that's the east right and then to the west it stretches and opens up into another room hmm Dogwraith looks at Metra a look that says what do you think the west the west and dog wreath nods

step out perception check uh traps on the floor on the way oh over 40 uh okay yeah you don't see anything 42 uh okay it's gonna keep walking before we go forward. I'm sorry. That was a 35. I was giving my stealth role instead of my perception. So that was 35 perception. And then stealth is a 33. Stealth is a 33? Okay. He's going to actually... I'm trying to stay close to the wall here.

The fog of war making it a little tough. And so he'll get as close to this room as he can without being seen. Trying to peek in. Okay. Go further? No, where you are, I can, you know, if you go right there, that's where the turn is. So you get right up to the edge of the room and you see two things of interest. First, you see the room stretches to the south and continues on to the west.

You also see to the northern part of the corridor a staircase leading up. Oh. Right. And now it looks like there's something on the map here along the eastern wall right below Dalgrith.

It sure is. You see a bunch of things and then you see a cabinet. On the eastern wall of the room, there are an array of three-foot-wide ceramic tubes that run from floor to ceiling. And then on the western wall, where that little shelve is, you see several giant-sized cold-weather outfits hanging from pegs in an open wardrobe. Whoa. Weird.

Weird. And it's very warm the second you turn around the corner. The warmth is coming from the tubes. What the fuck? Check the pockets for change. All right. Quick perception for any sounds coming from around the corner or echoing down the stairs. That is a 33.

No sounds. He's going to look back to Nestor and Metra and just give the nod to come to him. Coast is clear. And then he'll move into the room once everybody's up there. You move into the room and it's incredibly warm in here.

The warmth is, like I said, emanating from these tubes on the east wall. And, yeah, spiral staircase leading up on the north part, and then these cold weather outfits, giant-sized, leading there. Something about cold and warm. You would think at high altitudes, it would be cold. So maybe the cold weather outfits are there to protect them, and also this warm room is there if the altitude bothers people. These aren't like frost giants.

I guess, are these ceramic tubes heating? Is it like steam in there or hot water heating? Hot oil? Interesting. Steam heat? Yeah, the ceramics. Can I go and touch one of the things without, you know, get close to it to see if it's piping hot? The closer you get, the warmer it is.

All right. Can I, Dalgreath, look around the corner here beyond the bookshelf? The same direction as the stairs, but seeing if there's anything around that corner. Okay. You look around the corner. I mean, how cool is this? It's pretty cool. It's just so different.

It's terrifying. You see that it, about 70 feet or so, well, 60 feet, the extent of your vision, it ends and turns north. Right. So, to the west,

back to the east. I'm not ready to go upstairs yet. Can we roll some sort of check on these tubes just to make sure they are where we think they are? I'll detect magic as well. Okay. You detect magic throughout

the room. There is faint magic emanating from the tubes, but nothing you can really get a grip on. However, you do detect magic coming from the

jackets on the pegs. You hang out and really zone in. It's one jacket in particular. I go to that jacket. Go to that jacket. Keep looking. And finally, give me a perception check.

36. You go to the jacket. It doesn't look different from any of the other ones. So you start rifling around. And in one of the pockets is a badge. Oh. The badge is emanating magic. And the badge just has, like,

images of, like, a cloudburst coming up and around. It's very ornate. Spellcraft? Yeah, give me a Spellcraft. Uh, 22. No, 21. 21. You don't know can i roll to aid um you can roll a fresh check fresh check uh i don't know either all right i'll put it in my pocket i'll check it tomorrow

check try again oh wait a second I'll check it tomorrow. Check it tomorrow. Oh, wait a second. Did you identify? It is not in our list of consumable items that I wrote. So I don't think we talked about it. We did talk about it.

Definitely talked about it. Hmm. Okay. Check it tomorrow. Check it tomorrow. I assume we did all that healing, by the way, right? Yeah. put myself yeah put yourself at full uh all right to the west or to the east under the stairs or over where we came from what do you think baron to the east back to the east all right slowly back up baron is thinking and it's mostly because they thought

of everything troy said joy joyously he's wondering if we should at least like throw a plank or something across the door we came in through because if it stands to reason that they can fly around and check different posts it would just protect our rear or at least give us some more time if someone tried to enter in from that way yeah but now they can come i think they can come downstairs in this set of stairs or we're just vulnerable no matter where we are yeah i don't think it's a bad idea baron i just can't imagine what we can you know a plank big enough to bar the door. I can't imagine it. How would you carry it? I'd be more afraid of a plank that big than any giant I could

think of, to be honest. So, you want to head back to the east? Are you heading back as a group? We could... You definitely... The hallway to the north, underneath the staircase, can we, should

we just take a look, make sure it's not just like a dead end? Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. I asked Bear Bear, he said go east, brah. If it's just around, I thought that on the west side, that ended. If there's something to check out around the corner. There's still stuff to check out. We should peek around this corner. Metro will peek around this corner.

Okay. Dollars goes where there's anybody else heading with there. Are you guys staying back? Yeah, I come too. We're basically there. dollars goes where there's anybody else heading with there you guys yeah i come to we're basically there unfortunately at that moment oh boy oh no when the four of you well i did not go there what are you talking about i was all the way to the east i started walking back when metro changed her mind were you waiting until i said that or were you no i literally somebody else

moved my pawn over there i did not i i moved his. Yeah, I did not. Fair enough. I was like, I don't know what to do. I saw your body go over there. Sadly, Baroness Pott committed you to this trap that just went off. You're kidding. No. You're serious? I'm not kidding about the trap. I am kidding about it affecting Dalgrith.

But at that moment, cold ice rains down upon Nestor, Metra, and Baron! Oh no. Then we'll see you next week. I knew it was coming! Why'd you make it start so long?

You're as cold as ice! Cold-hearted bastard! Hey, news coming. Why'd you make it start so long? You're as cold as ice. You're as cold as ice. Cold-hearted bastard. Willing to sacrifice our love. There's a rain of ice in your heart. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Glass Cannon Network production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo.

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