The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 276 - The Mighty Ducts

Episode Date: May 4, 2021

A ladder leading below the engine level reveals a maze of ducts. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Last week on the Glass Cannon Podcast, the heroes felled the Stone Guardians. It's dead. And finally reached the engine room. In the middle of this insane looking room sits a huge cylindrical open-topped steel tank that seems to be exuding a luminous mist towards the ceiling. But the technologies they discovered inside

the four stelae lights up as well. They have all been activated. Only deepened the mysteries of Iron Cloud Keep. But eventually you open it, and there is a ladder descending inside. Into the...

The adventure continues. The road to 300 is underway! Now. No. I was doing my prep for today's episode, and I can't remember how I stumbled upon this, but I saw this question come up. And the answer seems pretty obvious, but I thought it might make an interesting discussion. If not, we'll just roll for initiative.

But something to the effect of like, do arch RPG streamers and podcasters, are they playing the same game as people who don't play for an audience? You know? And I think the answer is obviously no, it's, it's two very different games. I think there are similarities,

but it's a very different game. Let's discuss this. I think it might be interesting yeah it's too different i think some people especially early on when people would literally just put their iphone on on a note record and just put in the middle of the table, they would be playing their home game. But that's not a good show. Yeah. So, and I think that they talk about, you know, the Matt Mercer effect, where people, especially new players, get intimidated because they think, well, I can't do that. Like, I can't do all the voices and, like, bring that kind of performance to the game.

So, like, I'm not going to bother. And it's just like, no, they're completely different games. Right. Both enjoyable in their own right. But they are different games. Now, I don't think... We're not faking it. Do you know what I mean?

Sometimes you might fake enthusiasm at the end of an episode. Because that sounds better. But the emotions are real. And I think what always separated us from other shows is that we're really trying to recapture what it feels like to actually sit and play the game. But over time, it's just changed. And now where the hobby has grown, where there's so many actual plays and so many Twitch streams, it really is radically different from what it feels to just sit around and play a home game. radically different from what it feels to just sit around and play a home game.

I mean, it freaks me out when I hear other people tell me that they like played for 12 hours in a row and finished a book of an adventure path. And that sounds awesome. And, and, uh, a great way to spend a weekend in a lot of ways, but there's some groups out there that, um, you know, emphasize just playing and getting through the story as quickly as possible. And, um, uh, there's nothing wrong with that, but it feels so alien to me to hear about that. And like, it's, they're so excited and I would be excited too, to be able to like, still haven't finished an adventure path yet. Fingers crossed on this one. Uh, but we were talking the other day, like, uh, you know, we finished so many different books of this adventure path, that adventure path. So, um, there's a bit more concentration to it but i've i don't know like

when i when i play longer games when we do a new game who this or any other stream that's longer sometimes it feels ages without that kind of like i'm so accustomed to a cliffhanger now after an hour it feels strange to me to not have wanted to continue playing right like it'd be weird to play a home game when you sit there for four hours you're like all right and that's we're going we're going to end today's session but that's that's how it goes we gotta go yeah i gotta go pick up the kids i feel like in jade region i'd always try and find a cliff even back then but sometimes it was just like somebody was walking out the door like, I'm sorry, I gotta go.

We'll pick up here next time. I recall almost every session ending in the middle of combat. Yeah. By the time I started playing with you all. It's true. We started that long before the podcast. But there were Cliffies. It was like, oh, rule that we'll save next time. And then it'd be months before we played again. I don't know. I think that you exaggerate that. I think it's possible you exaggerate

that. Maybe Cliffies came into play more after we started this show it came into our jade region game more but like there weren't cliffies true cliffies for like the first 30 episodes of this show it's true you know what i mean like you don't remember that but it developed over a long period of time i think our game has changed there's very little chance that if we weren't recording we would play differently than we play right now with the exception of like i think we'd be a lot fouler at times do you know what i mean yeah i don't know that i could play with you guys anymore the recording has really kept things in check it would be so nsfw yeah like nsfl honestly yeah no for real and uh i i don't know i think in general we're just the whole hobby is evolving you know what i mean like people are are putting more um you know you

talk about the matt mercer effect and that is sort of the idea of of uh new players don't want to gm right because they're like well i mean it's just i can't gm like that or players expect their gm to be like that and if they're not like that then they expect their GM to be like that. Yeah, that's the other side of it. And if they're not like that, then they're a bad GM. Like, that is just not, that's simply not true. Yeah. But there is a certain, role-playing games in general have gravitated more than ever toward role-playing and toward performance than they used to. And I think that that's really the hobby in general.

And I think that how much his actual plays affected that somewhat. I was thinking about that today or yesterday. I was thinking about the games that I grew up playing in middle school and high school and everything. And I was lamenting. I was mourning all of the

times that I lost because we weren't role-playing. I was like, it just never occurred to us to really like get into these characters and their stories. And it just feels like a waste. Like it was so fun, but it was just like, it could have been so much more satisfying. I just think about like the stories that I could have now, you know, compared to what I do have. Yeah. I was, I was watching was watching uh i was watching falcon in the winter soldier are you guys watching that yeah so i was watching that and uh no spoilers here it

was just it reminded me the importance that i never had when i as a kid playing this game of downtime because the just the idea of action-packed superhero awesomeness is exactly what we all want. But after a little while, you get fatigued. You're like, the stakes aren't the same. I don't need to see the same action all the time. And if there's moments, stretched moments, where the characters are not fighting and they're getting to know each other or there's comedy, you know what I mean? There's a lightness to it and it makes the stakes so much higher for the next action we never played like that we were kids we just went combat to combat yeah pretty much and and i mean i never got sick of it because

i loved it but like it just this to me makes it so much richer when you have those down times in between yeah which is what frustrates me about aps in general when there's a this perceived or implied clock all the time you have to keep pushing and have death defying feats every day for a month and then that's how you save the world i really if i was in this game if i was a character this game i would just quit i would just quit it's like it's not nothing's worth this well nothing is worth i think if you look back there's been the the gap of downtime is just shortened you had downtime there's travel time but as as you got closer to the end the downtime has been just shortened whereas and and of course right from five into six there was practically none you had to manufacture it and you will uh pay a penalty

because of it but like you think about uh ending book one you're like we gotta go to red lake fort and that was in long travel there was like gotta go to the minesman whole journey to get there yeah the boat time was downtime and it's still some of our favorite stuff yeah yeah you know those those downtime elements really bring out the big greatest part of the adventure i think oh yeah and there's still so much that we don't see and that we're playing that the characters experience like i don't think we've ever once role-played one of our characters going to the bathroom yeah i assume they do no and we should we really should in great detail get into that metro is full of mysteries

she only goes to the bathroom on the shadow plane so she plane walks every time i plane shift every night. You guys haven't noticed? It's like Troy. He doesn't use urinals. Metro doesn't use bathrooms on the material plane. Someone drinks a potion of plane shift.

Like, I'm in here. Does it knock? It's like that Rick and Morty where he has the one like pocket dimension where he goes to the bathroom and someone's like using his toilet. Oh a great episode yeah he's such a nice guy too yeah glad he had a friend like you uh yeah it's also different because this when you play

a home game people don't come uh like knock on your door and be like your home game's shitty and you're shit yeah there's a little less pressure also nobody pays you to play your home right it's true it's not your livelihood and your home game doesn't just stop when there's construction downstairs well everyone go home or a guy vacuuming the elevator we can't play my neighbor's vacuuming there's a man in his pajamas running around in the hall possible felony i'd love you to incorporate some of that real world stuff and then there's a police car on the battlefield at the end of holy grail these are all examples based on real life they are well i you know i i said this to you a few weeks ago. I think that as we get into this chunkier, the chunkier part of book six,

and we get into mechanics that are pretty foreign to us, what's going to make this work is if we just have fun as best we can and get back to our roots of just hanging out and having fun. Last week we had some fun with you guys finally discovering the engine room. Crazy room. I'm going to actually jump right on World 20 now and look. I mean, it's just the map, as gorgeous as it is, couldn't possibly do justice to everything that I described in the flavor text. to learn a lot and then blindly activate the forced delay with just absurd use magic device checks.

I mean, it's written in the book for it to be not impossible, but very, very difficult. But you were able to do it. The complicated thing is it's still technology that is so far above you. You feel like you have one piece of the puzzle, but without this cloud diadem, without something to actually steer it, you're really only putting half of the puzzle together.

Now, that's not to say that with the information that you have, you couldn't find a way to move the castle, but it might be premature, and then you would draw attention directly to where you are. Like, who's in the engine room? And so you chose to just say, let's pocket this information, and we'll deal with it later. Because it could become very helpful at some point. Now you want to open up this grate that you recognize.

There's these four circular hatches positioned on the floor around the tank. And you open up the one to the east and the north, which you think, based on your general layout of where you are, probably lead to other platforms. Whether they're manned by cloud giants or not, you didn't take any chances. You barred those doors. But unless there's a secret door that you missed, you really don't think there's anything left on this floor. That's not to say there aren't secret doors. There are two staircases leading up, so that seems like that's going to be in your future. But right now, there's a ladder going down.

We should say that we also maybe took one less chance than you insinuate in that we detected alignment through the doors and had a feeling that they were out there. That's true. We have pretty good intel that we have barred them out. And until a shift change happens, we're in good shape. That's right. And then to the North, you didn't feel anything, which was odd. Are there good creatures out there? No, you would have detected good. Are there creatures out there that are, have some spell under them that doesn't allow their alignment to be detected? Or was it just empty and if so why

perhaps you'll never know what do you do with this ladder sitch how can we see like what can we see what it descends down into dim light down there um but it looks like it goes about 20 feet down uh and you see a floor uh there's a rush of wind down there. It's cold. It feels like it's whipping around down there, but it doesn't feel like the windstorm that you experienced when you went to that outside propulsion duct that I think Baron found when you guys were climbing up the castle. It was like an exhaust pipe, and if we did go in there, it would have been hard. I can't remember why we didn't fly in there and said and went up to the platform as the castle began moving uh air shot out of there that was like uh hurricane force winds um so you would have not been able to use your ranged attacks

uh and you would have to roll checks to not be blown back down here you feel like they could be 11 15 maybe even 20 miles an hour uh which wouldn't have any mechanical effect on your characters. It does feel cold from that wind. Now, obviously, you don't know, like, is it going to start picking up again and start flying at extreme speeds? Is it speed-related? If the castle moves fast,

is it going to turn into a windstorm? You don't really know, but right now you feel like you could go down there and be all right. Dogrith, it feels like we could go down there and be all right. Where are you getting this information? I don't trust it. It's just a sense.

What have you seen down there? It's a sense I get from seeing the concrete floor 20 feet below. I don't know. It's dim light. I don't know. It's dim light. I don't trust it. Darkvision, my friend. Oh, yeah. All right.

You should go down then, I think. I agree. We should go down, Dogwreath. Yes. All right. All right.

I'll vanish. I set myself up. I'll vanish you. Dogwreath will sneak down. You're vanished. He vanishes and then goes down fast. Wouldn't you trip?

Like if you couldn't see your own hands and feet. I definitely would trip. I would fall all over the place. Yeah, I'd probably throw up. I almost fall. Like look at it and then try to grab it. Like if I'm carrying a bulky package or something, I can't see my feet going up the stairs. I'm like, oh God, I'm going to fall.

I'm going to fall. Yeah, Dog dog wraith will go down okay and uh did you want to roll stealth or you were just saying sneakily flavor sneak i'll roll a stealth that's a 59 okay oh man wow all right so you'd like cat like climb down the ladder he's invisible i'm invisible like a non-existent cat but moving down the ladder you would not get your plus 40 um but you get plus 20 don't you yeah i think you get plus 20 so that was with the plus 20 so you get down there and you see this duct it's like nine feet in diameter. Circular in shape. The walls are like circular.

And it just winds forward. I'll reveal a little bit more to you. You see about 20 feet away a fork that goes multiple ways. He's just got a few rounds of this so he'll move up stealthily and look at the fork both ways okay and you can see in dim light right correct no problem all right so you look to the left uh and it just stretches to the extent of your vision keeps going you look to the right it only goes about 15 20 feet before it turns to the extent of your vision, keeps going. You look to the right, it only goes about 15, 20 feet

before it turns to the south. And then up ahead, it just keeps stretching to the north until it meets a wall about 50 feet away and turns to the east. Wow, so a whole catacombs under here. I can see 60 feet, so if there's more to the left. Okay. All you'll see is about it it uh it may be 30 feet and 40 feet away there are two uh passageways to the north

so it's really just a winding tunnels down here and what is it made of it's just like is it hollowed out from there's is it rock yeah it's hollowed out directly from the rock and there's wind flying through these These are propulsion ducts. Oh, so that's the thing that came out the side. Right. These lead to those outlets. So if we had found a way to force our way through those hurricane-force winds, this is how we would have come through here?

Into the engine room? Right up into the engine. That's crazy. Quite possibly. I mean, this thing's going in every which direction, so you don't know what... And I don't feel the wind? I you do it's it's cold down there not like i said no mechanical effect but it's about 15 to 20 mile an hour winds oh uh all right so is it coming like there's pipes on the map that seem to be leading from the engine into the floor is the

wind coming from these pipes ultimately? Yeah, probably a combination of wind from outside and then whatever the engine is generating that's causing this whoosh. Okay. All right, Dogwrith will come back up, become visible again, come back up and describe what he saw. I don't know. Could be there's nothing down there, but

ducks translate the wind throughout the castle, but there might be a secret entrance into another room. Could be they stashed something down there. I don't know if it's worth exploring. How late in the day is it? It's not very late. Well, were you guys sleeping?

What is your sleep schedule? We haven't really established it because you're indoors now. But you used to, like at Skirkotla's camp, you would sleep through the day and strike at night. Are you on a more normal schedule now? I think we started to infiltrate when we teleported into the volcano. I think it was like morning, right? Wasn't it? Yeah.

I think so, too. It was daytime. I think we're on a normal schedule. I think you are, too. Yeah, I think we're on a normal schedule. And so you had just woke up and started exploring. Your first encounter of the day was against those statues, so it's still pretty early in the day. Yeah, it can't be later than noon.

Yeah. But we did sleep. Didn't we rest in Renfell's chamber? Oh, no, we did. Yeah, that's't be later than noon. Yeah. But we did sleep. Didn't we rest in Renfall's chamber? Oh, no, we did. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. And so your first encounter of the day around 10.30 after breakfast was the statue. 10.30? I think we got going a little earlier than that.

I don't know. Don't wait until it's early to rest. It's Sunday. We defeated a small battalion of animatronic statues. Yeah. We had mimosas. It's a good day we went out yeah yeah the rest of the day is bonus little statue encounter brunch um what do you guys want to do do you want to explore the ducts or do you just want to assume that this is like a maintenance tunnel that isn't going to lead to much of anything and i don't want

to get swept out of this place i'm definitely walking into the wrong room but it might be just worthless i gotta say i'm a bit curious after rimfall peaked my dwarven curiosity for the fantastical he said there may be more treasure here and baron is licking his chops ah treasure hidden within the ducks you think yeah maybe there's could Could be! Could be! That's where I would hide my treasure, in the place that hurricane-force winds flow through. Yeah, I don't know. Unless it's, like, covered with a tarp or something.

I don't know if I'd put my treasure down in a windy duct. It could be wedged in the wall. The windy ducts just keep you from getting to it. But it's like Dalgris said. These ducts might lead to other rooms we haven't even been to yet. Yeah, it's true. It's true. I think, you know what?

I think you're right. And so I think you should definitely go down there and explore them thoroughly as we wait up here. All right, Dalgris. Vanguard it up. Lead us through. Strike team, Delta! And he jumps down the ladder. It's a soul hug.

Boom. down the ladder. It's a soul hog. Leroy Jenkins in there. He takes nine points of falling damage. Oh, fuck it. It's still stone down here. Still stone. Dalgry's ankles are just one big calcified bone. You can smack him so many times

jumping down ladders. He's like an NFL lineman.. No, he's like, he's like, he's like an NFL lineman every morning when he gets up and he just tapes his ankles like over and over and over and over

and over until these huge bulbs down by his ankles. All right. All right. So Dally jumps down. Is everybody joined him? Yeah.

Yeah. I'll go down. I'll climb the ladder. Okay. I got to say nester would be a little concerned about going into a place with this if the winds are this high because there's only means of of fighting right now is a bow and arrow right yeah they don't play well in the wind we're so antiquated i know is there uh any degree of prep We want to do before we go down there I don't want to turn this into a Pathfinder Society game I don't want to buff for 20 minutes

But should we cast like Spider Climb And Baron Eyes the wand sticking out of Metra's satchel What wand? She doesn't have any scrolls I don't have any scrolls Stop I said wand

I fixed it I fixed it It's Spider Climb communal So if something were to happen I fixed it I fixed it I fixed it It's spider climb communal So if something were to happen I could just You know what tell you what We don't want to just do it now because it's going to be One minute or two minutes

Is that how long yeah I didn't know how long Is spider climb second level so maybe it would be three minutes Well it's spider climb communal So I think it's actually third level Oh in which case it might be like five It's a second level spell 10 minutes per level spider climb communal oh no i'm just looking at regular spider climb communal still 10 minutes per level and that's a third level spell all right so it's probably a fifth level caster which means 50 minutes oh yeah 50 minutes okay oh yeah well actually you want to do it now yeah let's do it

let's do it all right so spider climb commune do i have to divide it in 10 minute increments if it's communal i don't know we divide the duration 10 minute intervals so we're saying it's 50 minutes so there's four of us 12 and a half okay so we get about 12 minutes all right no i have to give you 10 minute intervals yeah so it's 10 minutes each so 10 minutes each and one of us gets 20 And do you have unlimited Not unlimited uses but do you have a ton of uses Of the wand? Only 10

Do you want me to assume that you're Going to re-up every time? I think you should assume That we're going to move 12 minutes forward Then we'll reassess But we're going to move quickly Great I'll let you know when that time We've only got 10 charges if i if something were to

happen i could immediately cast it and as my first action and then we'd all have it okay so you you have it out uh-huh you know what i'll put in my spring sheet i'll take a minute to reload my spring sheet all right just take out the gravity bow wand insert the god love pathfinder uh you say out the gravity bow on which we learned uh is uh target personal so she has to give it right back do you have any use oh uh i don't i i would have i did actually know this because it's a big deal in in the the video game oh i didn't realize kingmaker in uh in kingmaker you had a multi-class to get it or something no because ordinarily rangers get some spell casting but as slayers that's one of the things they give up as a ranger and nico used it it was on the occultist spell list uh because

as an occultist you can be a pretty competent ranged attacker as well. So it works for that. Which way do you guys want to go here? Lots of different options once you get to the... I keep wanting to say fork. What is it when it goes four ways? Intersection? Intersection. Interchange.

I feel like there's a better word than intersection. Node. I don't like that one. Hold on, let me get my computer sounds back. All right. I'm going to get to the node. Can we be efficient about this? Can we look at where it may go and then what might be the most effective?

I mean, it looks like we've seen most of this whole level. So why don't I kind of want to start by circling back maybe? To the west? Yeah. I'm down for the west. Okay. To the west yeah i'm down for the west okay to the to the west so uh dalgrath is going to he's going to you know ease his uh passage and stop the second he feels any change in the wind

like if it's faster okay at all um all right he's gonna start moving all right so you start moving uh to the west and as you get to uh the first passage, you see it just keeps stretching to the north. The second one does the same. As you continue or as you get further in and see how far it goes west, about 70 feet ahead, it turns to the south, but then also there's another passageway just before that, like another four-way intersection. Oh, there's a whole network down here.

Yeah, it looks like a sewer tunnel. Yeah. all right let's lots of different options it's a wind sewer baron automatically gets checks for secret doors so let's just keep that going and yeah we'll just keep walking and uh i guess the the methodology the attack plan is for dalgryth to make sure it's clear and then wave up metra who can see double the length every time he gets to a checkpoint. It's only small, dim light. Oh, okay, great. So we can see forever. We can see, yeah, more than 60 feet even.

Great. We should try to stay within, we should stay tight together if you do want me to have spider climb at the ready. Okay. Well, let's all just walk together then. Dalgrith doesn't have to scout right now. All right. And, yeah, Troy, the dim light thing. Like, why is it dim light light where's the light coming from um inside you all along i'll see myself out

as you get further away from the engine room you're plunged into darkness got it makes more sense yep um but you know you would think if these do open up to the air and it's still light out, eventually you'll get a little more dim light. All right. So you walk past those first two northern passages and you see that metric and see about 80 feet up. It starts to turn. The first one turns to the right. The second one turns to the left. You get to the next intersection and you see about 40 feet to the right, the second one turns to the left. You get to the next intersection, and you see about 40 feet to the north, it turns to the west, and then to the

south, it turns in the same way as the first corridor you entered, and you see a ladder leading up. Okay, it goes back to the engine room. And then these two, the northeast and northwest, are probably going to wrap around on each other. Or, I mean wrap touch each other and then go to some sort of exhaust or maybe they don't touch each other maybe they just go straight out of the building but i mean it's pretty

symmetrical it's totally symmetrical so far yeah is it is it even worth it rolling a perception check to see if we hear anything in these corridors i mean with the wind uh you can yeah probably pump up the wind sure you know i i think even i'd have to look at uh the chart but i feel like the for the different types of wind there's a the one whatever's above moderate heavy or whatever you start taking sound based perception penalties but moderate you don't uh i could be making that up but okay but it's fine because you're the GM right

that's true you make up whatever the fuck you want sorry if you don't like it that's 29 perception for Metro 29 perception for

Metro she's like everyone stop maybe we should try to listen to see if we hear anything and 37 for Nesta uh 44 if it's a trap

44 it's a trap alright so uh yeah so it goes light, moderate, strong it's a trap 44 it's a trap all right so uh yeah so it goes light moderate strong it's strong uh you take a start taking range penalties and then it's a minus two like flat skill penalty which would in this case include perception but not for you where it's still moderate uh you guys don't hear anything anything out of the ordinary i should say we should also point out the engine room even though it's not an internal combustion engine is basically a four-cylinder v12 because i'm just looking at it now and there's there's 12 of these pipes leading out of the

center area and they divide into four different sections our gear fans can get a kick out of that. It's a hemi. Dog Wraith will turn to Metro and just say, Are you making sure to detect magic all along? Of course, I always do that. This is where at least, at least a dozen of those 50 magic items are down here. Find them! It's a good idea. Find them!

Let's assume that I'm detecting magic pretty steadily as we move yeah you know i'm at this point in my jamming where it's like uh what's the best way i can analogize this remember back in the day on wheel of fortune at the end they would all just guess rst lne and then occasionally someone would choose a or o now they just give them to you and they choose words that have very few of those letters. Right, very few of those letters. Same like, I'm assuming a 15th level, whatever you are, is going to be detecting magic at all points.

What the fuck? Well, that was a little uncalled for. I can't keep track of all the characters. I truly can't. Sorcerer. Are you 15? Yes. Okay, I truly can't. Sorcerer. Are you 15? Yes. Okay.

I got that right. Yeah, detecting magic. It's like when your dad doesn't know how old you are. How old are you? When's your birthday? Yeah. When's your birthday?

That's right. Greatest day of my life. What grade are you in? So close to Christmas. Is that hard? Thank God my wife's is on Christmas. Otherwise I'd be screwed. I know.

You really hit the jackpot. You should have got married on Christmas, too. Then you'd be completely covered. You were so close. We got married 13 days before Christmas. Yeah, yeah. So now I have Dash's birthday on the 7th. Our anniversary is on the 12th, I think. And then birthday on the 7th. Our anniversary is on the 12th, I think,

and then Christmas on the 25th. Troy, I want to look at your January credit card statement, the one that comes in January for December. I just want to see how big that bill is, baby. You really, really don't, with the way I go overboard at Christmas. I was going to say, how long do you think your Christmas spirit

is going to buoy you through that December in the future? Oh, thank God for Hallmark. Where do you guys go? God. A lot of options. I wonder if we'll ever go, again, like a five-episode stretch, even in the off-season, without mentioning Hallmark Christmas. I don't know how we managed to wedge it in somewhere. Well, every Friday night they show keep people to keep milking people along

my dad so my dad is big into them too like he my dad watches it more than i like i'll message him in july i'm like what are you doing it's like i just watch it on mark he watches it all day long and he'll watch like the off-season ones like the new year's themed ones and the valentine's day in the spring and easter ones so i've started to dabble it's not the same uh but it's all the same actors and it's the same that's another thing that separates our game from home games is the amount of hallmark references i don't think it happens the most uh a friend of the show ryan costello messaged me uh once't think I even wrote back. I never write people back. Oh, no, I did. They have an RPG called

Warmer on the Winter, and it's basically you're creating Hallmark movies. Oh, wow. The holiday RPG. Oh, that sounds amazing. New game, who did? Oh, we should do a Christmas RPG. Oh, we should. New game, who did? Don't get me started. Oh, my God!

That would be amazing. And film it!. Don't get me started. Oh my god! That would be amazing. And film it! Play like a small town character. It's like coming back from the big city. She gave up her law career to go back to Hollyville. Where she grew up. To run the family toy shop.

Run the family toy shop. You laugh. That's three different plots I've seen. I mean Troy Literally Oh god You could sit down And you could easily

Come up with 20 Like setting City names Just like you When you're doing Character creation You just roll We would laugh

Our asses off We should just Write our own And pitch it to Hallmark We should I know How hard could it be Can you imagine

Hauling up to Hallmark Channel and be like Have we got a proposal For you Picture this She was a New York Doctor Can you imagine? Calling up the Hallmark channel and be like, have we got a proposal for you? Picture this. She was a New York doctor that moved to Alaska to treat reindeer. That works.

That works. Oh, my God. That's amazing. There we go. Troy, I never told you this, but my friend Rachel started her career as a director directing Hallmark movies. Good for her. So I have an in if you ever get this off the ground. Oh, I think it would be wonderful.

Wait, I've lost the thread a little bit. Are we talking about pitching an RPG to the Hallmark Channel, or are we pitching a Hallmark movie about holiday RPGs to the hallmark channel or are we pitching a hallmark movie about holiday rpgs to the hallmark channel first of all why not both but you forgot what we're actually going to do is pitching the rpg to hallmark well they'd be like the hallmark uh christmas movie rpg we'll put this other kickstarter out of business and just do that i think that'd be fun colin it'll come with the dvd packet it'll be. Which way do you guys go? A glass of honey? Let's go. So you never finished what you were saying, which is what?

You're going to assume that Metro constantly detects magic. She's always detecting magic. Yeah. Right? You know, they did it in second edition. It's auto. Yeah, it's an exploration activity. Like one of them can be stealth.

One of them can be rushing or whatever. One is detecting magic. Yeah, I guess what I... And the whole time you're moving, you detect magic. What I wouldn't do is when it's bad for you. You know what I mean? Like, when detecting magic would reveal the presence of something bad, I'd want you to actively say that.

So, I guess it doesn't really help you. So, I guess I'll never know when I should do it. So, I guess we'll just say it every ten seconds. Yeah, I guess it's part of the show. But you know what? Sometimes you forget. This happens on Androids and Aliens more often, to search bodies. Yeah.

And I should be like, you guys would search those bodies. That happens all the time on Androids. There's just 19 people on the show. I always forget as a player. Yeah, it happens on Raiders, too. They'll be like, oh, we'll just assume that you pillaged the corpses. Well, it should at least least if we're doing that all the time make us travel half as fast right because it's one action to detect magic that's

true but we're also if we're stealthing we're moving it was moving okay great that was the cool thing about burning wheel is you would have what they but like what they call beliefs or creeds or something yeah and beliefs and instincts instincts and it's just like one of them could be uh my character will never leave a body unsearched after he's killed it and it's just like it's automatic every time you're in that situation like you can assume that your character automatically searches instincts are described in the book by luke crane as insurance against the gm yeah well our our first gm when we all when when jones and and I met, Chris Merwin instituted that in his game.

Do you remember? Like, my thing was, because you had three instincts and it was like, I always cast major armor at the beginning of the day. So you didn't have to say it. I didn't have to say that I cast major armor. I accepted that I got that plus four bone to my naked chest. All right. I think let's just keep moving

to the west and then turn south. You want to do the ring that leads to the engine room and then start to spiral out? Yeah. Let's do that. Let's take the whole day, explore the tunnels. Definitely. They would never expect it. Bridge and tunnel crowd, let's go.

So, Dalgrith, you round the corner here and you look down to the south. You see it stretches about 40 or so feet where there's something, a tunnel that turns to the west and then another 15 feet away from that, another one that turns to the west. So it's very similar to what you saw to the north, symmetric so far, as Skid put. And when Metra comes up, where she has a further dark vision, I will just say that she can see it stretches all the way down. Looks like a perfect square so far. Great. All right, we'll keep going. Yeah, I mean, based on what you said at the top of the episode I think this just goes to show that no

We don't play Differently in our show because this Is unbelievably Boring and we don't care We'll do it for our show We'll clear all the maintenance Tuttles below the cast Well you know it is and it isn't

Because you don't know what you're going to find Just because something is this way Now, you could find something good or bad. So there's tension there. It does give me a good idea of where to go after we drown this if it continues this way, which is it looks like there are propulsion ducts, if we can assume that, leading out to the doors that we have seen guards on. I guess we detected them. I don't know if we opened that one to the west.

But it looks like those will lead to about where we saw the ones outside. But there are two secondary ducts leading off to the northeast and northwest off of the north ones, and those might go to somewhere else. Those don't appear to be linked to any of the doors we barred or encountered people through. So that's where I want to return to once we make this circle, if it's all symmetrical, as Skid has pointed out. I'm really happy with my map reveal work. It's pretty impressive.

I agree. Joe, you've had some comments about my map reveal work in the past, but this is some of my best. You've heard no complaints. Okay. Except right here. A little error, but it's okay. I tried working on that. It's a rounded corner. This one here, real embarrassing. A rounded error, but it's okay. I tried working on that. It's a rounded corner.

This one here, real embarrassing. A rounded corner is just exhausting to try and do. There's 40 ducks. There's only so many polygons in a day. All right, I'll keep moving to the south. Okay. So for everybody listening at home, we are now approaching. We're about to be right under the moon door.

That's where we're headed right now. We're very close. So Dog Wraith will sneak up and then look around the corner. This one, before he crosses it. Yeah, it goes about 60 feet and then turns to the north. Okay, yeah, I'm seeing it now. And surprise, surprise, the next one goes about 60 feet and turns to the north. Okay. Yeah. I'm seeing it now. And surprise, surprise, the next one goes about 60 feet and turns to the south.

Oh, yeah. Okay. Cool. He'll keep going. Okay. Keeping it stealthy. Keeps trudging along. Always assumes danger. Okay. Rolling stealth or just... Rolling stealth. Every time.

That is a 40. Okay. All right, yeah. You're very, very sneaky. You come to this next one, and exactly the same as what you've seen so far.

It looks like it's going to complete the square. There are passageways about 20 feet, one to the north, which you think is going to lead to another ladder, feet, one to the north, which you think is going to lead to another ladder, and then one to the south, and then at 40 and 60 feet in, two more tunnels that lead to the south. Okay.

Dogwraith will slowly go, checking the tunnels as he goes, rolling stealth as he goes in an attempt to complete the square. That is a 33 stealth. Okay. So, Dogrit's super stealthy. Is everyone on his heels after he... Yeah. Yeah, sure enough, you do see that ladder,

and everything looks pretty similar thus far to what you've seen. This map looks really cool. Yeah. Yeah. I was just thinking, I was like, boy, we've explored so much of this floor, and yet there's so much still unrevealed. Now my confusion has been... Yeah, well, spoiler alert, on the future floors, there's going to be a lot that's unrevealed.

It's just there's a lot of rock that's not part of the map. We don't mind seeing the rock. Well, just show it to us so we can be immersed. But then we know there's no secret doors. There's nothing there. But when he doesn't ask for a check, we know there's no secret doors. It's true. It's complicated.

It's very complicated. I've gone through, when I started preparing this, it feels like a year ago, and started doing these maps, i had a whole different approach that i changed once you guys finally got here because it's just i've never dealt with maps this size yeah it's almost like because we approached it from the outside we should see the perimeter of the walls but then there should be like 10 or 15 feet of fog of war until we get it it's it is confusing you could do it a bunch of different ways. And so as you're traveling along here, Dalgrith,

you see yet again another intersection. The one to the north probably leads to that final grate. And then just beyond that, another turn to the north and a passageway leading to the south. Okay. Then we'll keep heading around to the north and just see if there are two tunnels that head off to the east. Okay. That's what we should see.

All right, let's stop right there. Oh, no. Okay. I'm going to have you, basically, Dalgrith walks up and all of you were right behind him. So you've all sort of gone into that corner there, but I'm going to have the rest of you be back a little bit, because Dalgrith was ahead. I just want to say that even though I didn't say it right before I came up there, I was being completely heedless, and I wasn't looking at where I was going,

and I was woefully unprepared and was not sneaking at all. I just want to be clear, because I didn't say that specifically. No, you'll get a small bonus to that. Started drinking, like, halfway through. Right. Started stumbling. Right when I saw, like, the square start to complete, I was like, there's nothing here! And then I just started pounding whiskey.

Those mimosas weren't enough at brunch. You got to follow them up with something. 10.45 in the morning. Yeah. Well, it's that awful. Like, remember the statue brunch where we have mimosas and then beat all those statues? It's that awful time where it's like you had a fun brunch, but then it's like 2.40 and you just start feeling terrible

because you should not have drank champagne at 10.30 a.m. You're like, well, how am I going to rectify this? More champagne! Why did I tell them I didn't want any water when they asked if I wanted water? No, because it'll make me less drunk. Like, what? No, no.

Just drink water. All right, this is crazy what's No. No. Just drink water. All right. This is crazy what's about to happen. Oh, no. And it's been giving me massive fits. And I'm just going to start describing what happens, and we'll take it from there. Oh, gosh.

Dalgrith is sneaking along, and he's being incredibly stealthy. And that means he gets a little further ahead from everybody else Because he's going along and the rest of you are coming up from behind at your own pace I mean, I just want to throw this out there For better or for worse, we did say because of Spider Climb We were going to stay all together Right, right, okay I think that affects the back cluster but i think that was phenomenal listen there's a bus down here and baron is throwing dalgryth under it so

is that the party now instead of true now four we're dalgryth in the back cluster give it up for a dog no we can all be together we're the true now three and the pit but it is we changed our tactics we did say that so it's it's that's conceivable too that we're all together uh no that is uh you know it's always good to uh i have a feeling this approach the bench i have a feeling this is going to make it way worse for us i know i didn't know why you didn't just leave me out there. No, it's definitely not going to make it worse for you. It's just very complicated.

And so I want to make sure we're all on the same page before this goes down. And let me just rearrange this so that I could... Oh, boy. We are currently in a formation I like to call We Ride Together, We Die Together. Yeah. An I formation. It's actually a wishbone. Yeah, the eye formation we did say that metro was going to stay in melee with dalgrith specifically yeah no that's right all

right so the four of you are all together at this intersection i imagine dalgrith came up looked nothing here and then the rest of you came up on his tails and that is when shit went down oh my god these tunnels are going to fill with lava. I can feel it. If it was lava, it would be so much easier. Oh no. And easier on everyone. This is horrible.

This is horrible for everyone. And I'm just going to say what happens. At that moment, surrounding the four of you, as if out of thin air, four creatures appear. And I'm going to just show you what they look like, because it is just wild.

They look like this. They are enormous spider-like monsters with an eerie humanoid face that is surrounded by a shaggy mane of fur.

What the fuck? They just phase into existence. Oh, face spiders. Let's do a close-up so you can see what will certainly spell doom for some of you. Oh! That sucks. They look like Qu'Allah.

That sucks. They look like Qu'Allah. That sucks so bad. Oh, come on. Yeah, they're bad news bears, and they just all appear surrounding you in this intersection. And at the same time, appearing in a very similar manner to them is another creature behind the one that is next to Dalgrith. And she looks like this. Oh, badass.

Oh, hell yeah. Can she join the party? Now that is a heavy flail. Is she giant-sized? She is giant-sized. She is huge, in fact. Oh, man, for just 25 cents extra. And she has got dark, bluish-black skin.

I mean, it's more like a dark blue than black. Obviously, it's dark here. She's got this long, flowing gray and red robe, beautiful golden breastplate, and she's holding in her hand a spiked chain. Let's just hand wave all this. Because you seem really stressed out, and I don't want to subject you. Yeah, it really would be.

No, no, it's okay. We can just R-S-T-L-N-E it. We know that we usually win these kind of combats. Usually win. Let's all agree we'll each take 40 hit points worth of damage. That sounds fair. Expend a certain number of spells and abilities, and then we'll just move on.

How many spell slots do you want us to use up? Wait, you said two? Average two per creature? First of all, I said huge. She's only large. No, no, no. This is... The main complications is

this is going to be one of the hardest encounters you've ever faced since we started playing this game. And to make matters... So ridiculous. To make matters worse, they all get a surprise round and none of you do. It's based on their ability.

I'm going to click auto-resolve this combat. Can we just auto-resolve? Fast forward it. Roll for initiative. So none of them have any magic items. Is that correct? No, there's some magic items. So they weren't here. They weren't invisible and then became visible. Right.

They weren't on this plane. They weren't on this plane. That's pretty exact planar travel. Yeah. I mean, there, yeah. This will be a fun talkback after this combat. No, it won't. They might be a little off their guard, though, because they just finished pooping.

It's true. It's true. You can see it everywhere. Baron, what did you roll? 26. Oh, beautiful. Very good roll. Dalgrif.

20. 20. Nestor. 23 for Nestor. 23 for Nestor. Metra? Metra rolled terribly, but I have some sort of ability I have to remember because I haven't used it in a while that I can re-roll an initiative i have to let me guess another tattoo oh i have

a tattoo let's me re-roll that no i believe this is an infusion oh And I can roll twice. Excellent. Metra got a 27. Gotta keep up, Baron. You're a little too slow. 27 and she's gonna need it. The woman in the back will go first in this surprise round, followed by her four companions that will all act in the surprise round.

And then we'll go back to round one, where she'll then act again. No. This is really not great. She is going to... She appears, okay? And then she speaks. I don't care for that. And you hear her say,

Zon-Kuthon, give me the strength to strike down my foes for the Umbral Court! What? And she does a motion very similar to what you see Baron do every time he calls down judgment. She's an Inquisitor giant! A giant evil spider lady Inquisitor. Of Zon-Kuthon? Oh, no. For the Umbro Court!

That's what she does in her surprise round. Could be worse. Could be worse. Let's get to these face spiders. The first one here will go after Dalgrith with a vital strike Neon green all day That is going to be a 34

And now you have improved uncanny dodge So you can't be caught flat footed, is that correct? I believe so Okay, so that would be against your regular AC That is still a hit Okay That's a vital strike, by the way. So that's going to be a lot of damage.

25 points of damage. And we'll attempt to grab you. That is going to be a 37 against your CMD. I'm not even kidding when I say that I could smash this computer over your fucking head. Wait, I misspoke.

I misadded. Thirty-one plus thirty-five. Fail. My CMD is 31 plus 35. Fail. CMD is 37. Okay. You mother! I did the math quickly, and I'm like, if it's close, I'll redo the math. I figured, so it was exactly 37.

Yeah, so no, that was only a 35. Only a 35. So, even though this is a surprise round, and he already took his standard action, he has an ability that allows him to take his full complement of actions during a surprise round. Oh, my God. So then he will use a move action to phase out of existence. Oh, for God's sake. Sure, sure.

Why wouldn't you? Why not? The one to the north will attack Dalgrith as well. No, actually, this one will attack Metra. Vital Strike on Metra. 35 to hit. Flat-footed, of course. Flat-footed for Metra.

Oh, two eights on those second D8s that came out. So that's going to be 31 points of damage. Wow. An attempt to grab is a 37. That one is a 37, so it grabs you. Yep. And then I need both you and Dalgrith to roll a Fortitude save against its poison. Okay.

Dalgrith, I forgot to have you roll that Fort save. 25. 25, you're fine. God, I hate this. Such a reasonably good bonus, and I'll still fail it. No, you'll do great. Natural three! Like every time!

Every fucking time! That is a 17. You are poisoned. Let's see. Yep, once a round. So let's roll out some con damage. That's going to be only one point. One point of con damage to start.

We'll see how this goes over the next eight rounds, how much con you will have left. You can't make two consecutive saves to end this poison. Metra is grabbed, but not poisoned. The other one here to the south will go to try and bite Baron with a vital strike. Around that corner, dog?

One of those legs? You don't want to phase out of existence? No, no, because I've grabbed you. Yeah. Baron, good point. I think, don't forget, it's taking up these two squares here. And so if it was like down here to the south, that would be really around the corner.

But where it's got those two squares on you, it has a clear path to grab you. Go ahead and give yourself a plus two to your AC, though, because there are other people there. Just a little flavor bonus to your AC, because it's a complicated corner. Got it. Vital strike. Oh, of course, Grant gets the lowest roll. 26 against your AC. Miss against flat-footed AC.

Wow. And then that one will phase out. And then the one next to Nestor. Big roll here. Big roll. You want to have at least two combatants still in the fight. It's going to hit me. That is going to be a another shit roll 26 yeah of course it's flat footed okay yeah all right i will get hit every single time i just do not have enough armor 33 points of damage goes to grab nester and that's a 34 against the CMD. Uh, that

is, yeah, I think that gets me too. Uh, yep. Exactly. And then a Fortitude save against the Poison. Ugh! Ugh! Uh, that is a 25.

25, you're fine. You're fine against the Poison, this first dose. Uh, so Nestor... First of many. Nestor and Metra are grabbed. Baron is free, which is good news. Dalgrith is also free, but he did take some damage. Round one.

All right, good, Troy. You made it through the surprise round. Gets easier from here. No, it doesn't. It is her turn. She will swift action cast or call down Bane Dwarf. Bane Dwarf against, which would obviously affect Baron and Dalgrith. And then she will, as a move action,

boom, activate something on her cloak, which causes blur to affect her for a certain amount of time. And then she reaches up into the sky. Her hand turns into flames, and she touches her spike chain, and the spike chain just erupts with flames. She casts some sort of spell on her spike chain and the spike chain just erupts with flames. She casts some sort of spell on her spike chain.

There better be something good down here. As a standard. I don't even know why we came down here. Why did we come down here? Why did we just came down here? Because we're out of curiosity. Troy promised a minimum of ten magic items. I'm not even supposed to be here today.

I don't want to point fingers, but Grant's completionism is really biting off. I wanted to, too. I was... But I'm stupid and don't listen to me. I only do what Grant says. I don't think for myself. I'd like to

confer with my attorney before answering your questions. We should have a lawyer for these. Yeah, we really should god i just we feel this is really dumb coming to these things with no representation i'd like to turn to my attorney before i take every standard and move covering the mic with your hand and like lean over no no my client didn't mean that he's very stupid just give me a few seconds all right she is gone uh yeah we're jokes, but this is a very serious situation.

Yeah, this is messed up. Well, that's what we do when we know we're all going to die. So we just start making jokes. Like the Spartans, our laconic humor comes out in situations like these. The one to the south that had phased out comes back and tries to... They all rolled over 27 initiative? No, no, I rolled individual initiatives for all of them. She rolled a 31, and this spider rolled a 28.

I let Donjon do all my rolling from now on. Don't worry, a PC will go next. But in the meantime, this one is going to try and grab Dalgrith. Big roll here. First, the vital strike. Oh, probably a miss with a 24. That is a miss. Okay.

So then let me just make sure I'm using the correct amount of actions here to have it re-phase out. Phasing in is a move action. Is it not? For this creature? It's a free action to phase in, a move action to phase out. So it will phase out. Yeah, these are

very complicated. These are very bad for PC. I think by complicated you mean unfair. Yeah. Very imbalanced. They're wildly unfair. I read, in doing some preparation, I read some post about like, is it bad to put a bunch of blah blah blahs against a fourth level party? And they were like, you will 100% kill that party every single time because of these monsters.

It's complicated. All right. A moment of respite. Metro, what do you do? You are grappled. I was like, is it respite if I'm being grappled by a monstrous spider lion woman? Relative respite, but a soothing embrace. All right.

I would like to ask you a question. I'll allow it. I'm grappled. That means I can take actions that use one arm, right? Correct. So I'm in a dimension door, which only has verbal components. Okay.

I would say that means I can only take one person with me. Because I only have one arm. Right. That's fair. That's fair. I like it because you have to be able to touch someone, right? You can touch them with your legs. Oh, that is true. That's fair. I like it because you have to be able to touch someone, right? Yeah. You can touch them with your legs. There's no somatic... Oh, that is true.

I mean, so I could... I think you could make the argument that I could get Baron and Dogwrath. That'd actually be badass if you, like, leaned back and, like, kicked out your legs to, like, touch each of us. It's cinematic. That's for freaking sure. Yeah. Yeah.

You know, I will say rule of cool. I could allow that. You do realize that leaves Nestor in a very, very bad position. You don't have to take Dalgrith. Great. I'll just take Baron. So yeah, I will reach, to keep it cool, I'll stretch out with my toe

to touch Baron. I'll point to Dalgrith and be like, I'll see you in a minute. And then we will Dimension Door out of existence. Cool. And I'm going to put us not too far away because I want to keep us... I don't want my friends to

be eaten alive. Sure. So I'm just going to move us to the western corner. Like right near the umbral inquisitor? No, the western. Oh, the western. No, that's Gcd so you went way back uh you and baron uh okay um creating some much needed space but leaving nester and dalgrith trapped would you

rather stay baron uh within if i can if it's safe for you uh you'd probably know just based off of my fighting style that i would need to be within 40 feet to assist yeah but i also know you can extend your range and i it's not safe for me okay yeah i mean that's a that's a you see me do that too so that's a standard action and i would only get 10 feet more so uh it's up to you but i think i think the hallway is pretty blocked off if i'm in front of you i can't reposition you i can't reposition us Right but This is metagaming but I think I'm gonna go next So I can Move up one like if you just

You want me to hold my action is what you're saying No I'll be in front of you as soon as your turn's over I'll just take a five foot step in front of you But these guys have reached In that moment what does Metra do Knowing what Baron's full compliment of I move us I'll move us right in front of the right in front of the little passageway that will lead up back to the engine room. The first intersection here on the south.

Yeah. Okay. Is that your turn? No. So that is a standard action. I will then use the quickened metamagic rod to mirror image myself. Okay. In rod we trust.

And then a move action I will step into the hallway, a five foot step into the hallway. Okay, so you head to that hallway to the north, which leads to the ladder that would take you back up into the engine room, the grate in the southwest corner if you remember the layout of that room.

Okay. And it is Baron's grate in the southwest corner, if you remember the layout of that room. Okay. And it is Baron's turn. Baron, there is one phase spider visible that is grappling Nestor. Yes, and Baron, hearing these tributes to Zonkuthon from this new

umbral inquisitor, says, Toreg, lend me the power, the fire of your forge to burn this perversity from the face of the earth. And calls down a judgment, which gives him both a plus two to his AC and a judgment of destruction to give him plus three on every damage roll.

Because he's at a full attack range, that was a swift action. He's going to move 20 feet forward, and then he is going to call down a channel vigor to put himself under the effects of haste. All right, so you cast channel vigor on yourself, and you choose haste, right? Because you have multiple options with channel vigor. yourself and you choose haste, right? Because you have multiple options with channel vigor. I think you're always under the effects of haste, but which limbs you choose gives you different bonuses.

Right. I will choose, in this case... Channel vigor directly into your loins! Loin vigor! Plus two to bone in. I'm going to channel the vigor into... No, I'll do it to my limbs. So limbs is haste.

Is that what you're doing? Yeah, yeah. I'll do it. You mentioned it. You're right. It's not always haste, so I'm going to do it to my limbs for now for the purposes of a haste spell.

I can move it to my torso for a bonus on fortitude, saving throws, spirit for will throws, and bluff and intimidate, and mind for uh knowledge and perception skill checks on ranged attack rolls uh so um that'll allow me to move all around here get into place i would have loved to have done a rapid shot into the spider to uh maybe kill it and free up nester but that'll happen next round and he just says nester i'm sorry i'll be there soon yeah this is uh this is very scary here so uh there are eight metros by the way one of them is eight metros uh between dalgrith and

uh this uh woman uh that spider reappears and uh tries to take a vital strike at uh old dalgrith who has poison coursing through his veins. He is shockingly still... Oh, no, he's not flat-footed because of improved uncanny dodge. This is probably going to be a miss. I started hot when using Neon Green. 27. It's a hit.

27's a hit. That's no bueno. Exactly. Actually, it's not exactly a hit. It's just a hit. That's no bueno. Exactly. Actually, it's not exactly a hit. It's just a hit. 32 points of damage. We'll attempt the grab. We know we're trying to hit CM

D of 37. Natural 1 on the grab. So no grab. I do need another fortitude save to see if the duration will extend. 24. 24. So my understanding is, obviously it was DC 22, you made it.

Had you failed, the DC would then bump up to 24 for the next time that you inevitably get hit by this poison. And the duration goes up by half. So I had already told you that it's eight rounds. Then it would have gone up to twelve rounds. And the thing with con damage is, that's what's going to kill you! Having that thing just last and last and last. So, what a way to go.

But you did save, it did not grab you, which is amazing. I thought three out of four of you would start the combat grabbed. Metro was able to get out of there. Nesta, though, is in a bad position. It did not grab you yet again and did not put a second dose of the poison in you.

And then it will phase out. Why wouldn't they? What a great tactic. It is Nesta's turn. All right, Nesta, he's grabbed. He's real limited in, he's grabbed. He's real limited in what he can do. He's got his bow pinned to his side as this thing is in his pinchers.

So he goes to his chest with his offhand. He pulls out his cold iron masterwork dagger. He stabs down with it for himself. Oh, yes, and that is a 90. Yep. For himself. Oh, yes. And that is a 90-17. That is a 38 to hit. 38 is a hit. Okay.

And that is 16 points of damage. Great. And do you just get that one attack because you had to draw? Yeah, because I had to draw it. Oh, actually, no, because I have quick draw. I thought so, yeah. Yeah, so let me do it a couple more times here oh another 90 17 that is a 33 to hit yep okay or 31 31 hits oh this is huge for nester because you obviously you put everything into your uh range so your strength bonus isn't

that high or do you have a feat that allows you to use your dex bonus when your stab is dead? Well, I have a... Oh, actually, you know what? No, no, no. That second... Because I had to use my swift action to... to do a steady target. So, no second attack. That was my only attack. Oh, okay. Well, you just used a swift.

You still have all your full complement. You can use swift and swift action and full attack. No, you just used a swift. You still have all your full complement. Yeah, you can swift action and full attack. No, I know. But now my damage is going to go down a lot, so I've got to recalculate everything. Okay. Gotcha.

Nestor just slits his own throat and gives up. Free action. Yeah, free action. Coup de grace on himself. I was going to say, you ought to use your swift. That might be a swift. Quick draw is free, right? Or does that count as a swift? It's free. Oh, it is free. I thought it was a swift action.

It is free. It is free. Joe, you said that twice very confidently. But that sounds like a Joe O'Brien confidence. It is. Is it? Well, I'm not 100%. You can draw a weapon as a free action instead of a move action. So that was free. Your swift was to study target. So yeah, you get your full compliment.

Okay. All right. I want to give you everything you can have. Okay. So the second attack damage is 15 points of damage. Okay. And start attack. Let's see.

That is 24. Hits exactly. Oh, my God. Okay. And that is 17 points of damage. Chomp, chomp, chomp. He's just shipping this thing. Yeah, that's great.

I like it. Very Nestor. If one of you guys is going to go down, I want to make sure we did it as close to the books as possible. Huge round for Nestor. All four strikes. Stop, stop, stop, stop! Takes this guy down significantly.

It is the other two spiders' turn. Oh, for God's sakes! So I roll a 20, and that's the lowest initiative. They both rolled 21. Oh, jeez. And I literally, I set up all these initiatives. What are their bonuses? Are these like plus 10, plus?

Plus nine. Yeah, they're up all these. What are their bonuses? Are these like plus 10, plus? Plus nine. Yeah, they're fast. Yeah. I was just wondering if you rolled Natty 18 for every single spectator. No, what I've started doing for all my encounters, because I do all this prep in advance on 15 different shows, I put everything into Don John. I let Don John do the initiative.

I write everybody's bonuses. That's what I do, yeah. It saves time, and then it's not, I don't feel like, oh, if the Inquisitor had rolled a two, well, that's what she rolled. I don't, I don't feel like, oh, if the Inquisitor had rolled a two, well, that's what she rolled. I don't, I don't know, I take me out of the equation. All right, so let's see who is left to go. Spider one and spider four.

So one is the one to the north of Dalgrith, and four is the one on Nestor. So, how fast can they move? Alright. This could be wild. This could be such a desperate gambit, but I kind of love it if I do this. Oh, gosh. Alright, so the one

that's grabbing Nestor is going to release Nestor, and just imagine Baron, what you see coming down the hallway. Scampers right up to you with their legs on the wall. It's like right out of, like, Alien RPG. Or it's the Demon's Souls boss

in the tunnel. It's all the way at the end of the tunnel, just shooting fireballs at you. That's exactly the... The iron something, right? I can't remember. Tough boss early on. I forgot it.

It's going to do a vital strike now. It's already used its move action, so this is the gambit. It may hit you. It may grab you. It may poison you, but I can't phase out. So here comes the vital strike.

What do you think? Nat 20, anybody? Anybody at home? Nat 20? I'm using neon green! Natural 1. Yeah! Yeah, baby!

Woo! It's the armor spider, by the way. You come at the king, you best not miss. You come at the king. It's like there is a pole, a magnetic pole coming from Grant, tied in to these dice rolls, and Joe has the opposite pole. Troy, it's only been magnified by the time I got all this titanium hardware on my shoulder. tied in to these dice rolls, and Joe has the opposite pole. Yeah. Troy. It's only been magnified by the time I got all this titanium hardware on my shoulder.

That's right. It is shocking, though. I mean, that should hit, I'd say seven times out of ten, a natural one. All right, fan fumboni. Sorry, so this is a melee fumble, right? Yep.

All right. Natural attack, if that matters. This one, Zach from Fort Worth, Texas. Oh, the Metroplex, baby. It's called I'm Too Hairy. Are they hairy spiders? They are. He said.

Yeah, they are hairy. They got a big shaggy mane around their face. This is your chest hair. We'll call it your carapace hair. Your spider hair caught in your armor and was torn out as a result of a bad swing. 1d4 bleed until magically healed

and stunned for one round. Fortitude save negates that stun. That's a fortitude against Baron's AC. And another natural one. Oh my god, a second fumble! Wow. This one from...

So it's stunned for one round. And 1d4 bleed until magically healed. Huge. Wow. Okay, I'll just take the bleed. Nice, Zach. It's its turn, so I'll just take the bleed right now. And that stun is huge

because now he can just unload it on it without incurring any attacks of opportunity or anything. That's amazing. I'm thinking I'm a genius. I'm like, I'm going to get right up on him so he has to move to not incur natural one i mean huge i say more power to you you're gonna need all the help you can get this guy up here i cannot move into position to uh go after nester because uh the other spider is still occupying a space there well Well, I guess it technically isn't because it's on a different plane. Why doesn't it just free action

phase out, move action phase in wherever it feels like? Because then it can't use another move action to phase out if I happen to miss. You know what I mean? I'm playing the... Free action to phase out. No, free action to phase in, move action to phase out. Free action to phase in, move action to phase out. Yes, that is correct. So I'm going to go after Dalgorth again.

You guys left Dalgorth alone. He deserves to die. Oh, again, just not a great roll, but I'm going to stick with Neon Green because the other side is going to come around. 26, mess? Hit. Oh, 26 is a hit. Okay.

I keep overestimating your AC because you're still, well, you're not flat footed, but you're just. Well, I'm standing there just not fighting giants. I mean, I have plus four armor on. I have a 22 dex. I really don't understand what I'm supposed to do. Yeah, no, it's bad news. 33 points of damage again.

I think this is the grab that's going to get you. I got a roll of 13 or higher and I didn't. A 96. So no grab, but I do need another Fortitude save. Still DC 22. If you fail this, it'll go to 24.

24. Okay, you're good. Nice. That one little bit of poison's coursing through you. Speaking of that poison, it is now going to take effect unless you pass your Fortitude save. Give me another Fortitude save here.

You need two consecutive saves to end this poison. 28. 28. That's one to go towards curing it until you inevitably get hit again. That one that went after you will actually not

phase out. Hmm. what does it want to do does it want to stay there and let you just fucking hack away at it or does it want to leave and then you're you'd be going after her I'm gonna have it phase out

ha I'm gonna have it phase out you fool and it is your turn Dalgrith Dalgrith turns this thing phases out And is like perfect And he's just Gushing blood He will be dead Permanently in a round

But at least he can buy his friends A few moments Before Joe's backup character arrives. And he's going to look up at her. And there's like, I could see the firelight on his face from this spiked chain that's just like in the tunnel. And it's coming for him. And he knows that his best chance is to get within the chain as opposed to be at a distance from the chain. And he's like, it's just you and me, princess.

And he just charges at her. And I do an acrobatics check to avoid an attack of opportunity. Okay, so this is, again, straight up CMD. And I succeed. What did you roll? I'm assuming I succeeded. Yeah, I wouldn't. I rolled a 51.

You're all right. Okay. And then I climb her. Attempt to climb her. Yeah, just one attack. One attempt to avoid. So now you're going to climb her. I'm going to attempt to climb her

Okay I'm so nervous Oh come on no god damn it Oh that's it I can't believe the way it comes out of these rolls Oh I can't believe it I just can't fucking believe it That is a 39

And you have to hit her CMD That is a fail. That's unbelievable. Unbelievable. Just done. Adventure over. Done. Like, I can't believe it.

One D20 roll. That's it. What did you roll on the die? I rolled five. His favorite. He's great. My favorite. And that's it.

I mean, he's dead. Now he's definitely 100% dead. Do you have any actions left? Well, I don't know. You know. You're on her. Well, the thing is. What's you know you're on her well the thing is what's that you're on her no i'm not i just failed to check to get on her oh i thought this oh oh right that's the thing i avoided the attack of opportunity i think you have a standard a move or a standard though so you could try to climb her again right um uh yeah right well i assumed i had

to move up to her and then an action to Climber. I see heat about this on the boards all the time. And I do too. We decided that it is an action, a separate action and not part of a move because it is a check against CMD. But are we wrong? This was Troy's ruling.

It's all gray. This class is not written to describe it. The ability is Limb Climber and it does not say what it is. It says it is a climb check. That's all it says. It doesn't say, as a move action, you may. As a standard action, you may. Sure, but is a climb check part of a move action?

Yes, a climb check is part of a move action. Well, then it should be part of a move action. I think we've misread it. But you ruled against that before because it was against CND. I'm talking about what is right, and it seems like we're getting harangued. Under the climb skill. Climbing is part of movement. So it's generally part of a move action.

So we just ruled it wrong. Because I saw a lot of people on the boards, and I think this is what it was in reference to. You should gather as part of a move action. Yeah, I mean, I know it's part of it. We did that in the early parts of the episode, the early stages of Dalgrith. He would just like scamper up and have a standard. And we changed that at a certain point. And it's just this, it's because it's not a climb check against a climb DC.

It is against CMD. So we said it was an attack against the creature. And that's what we ruled. We misruled it. Or I misruled it. Because I tried this. I think it was a discussion. Well, I'll take it again

if you let me do it again. This was also before the COVID break, I think. And so a lot more has come to light. But I'm of the understanding people are like, you can do it as part of

a move action. It's a climb check. All right. So then we'll take that as an action. And then that leaves a standard action. And I'll use that

to try to climb. Okay. So you're basically double moving. The first move failed. I mean, it was all I hoped for anyway. So you tried to grab onto a piece of her clothing or something? No, no, no, I got my swords.

I tried to, like, stab it in order to, like, get up. And I can't get purchase. It tinks off of her beautiful brass armor. And I'm like, duh! And he'll try one more time. I got this. Definitely. Oh, God, don one more time. I got this. Definitely. Oh, God, don't say that.

This is it. Don't say it. Natural two. Motherfucker. I'm all spent. I've got no energy to spend anymore. I'm so tired. I'm so tired of it.

I've got bad news and I've got worse news. The bad news is, it's her turn. The worst news is, we'll see you next week. Oh my god. Roll up a new deck. Go, Brad! I don't want to do all the

work associated with dying. I'm so sick of it. It won't be a lot of work. We'm just going to throw you through the moon. You have to do a lot of work that's associated with living. I can't make the die roll differently, Matthew. Dalgrith the Death Taker.

Five and a two. Five and a two. You could have been with Metro and you said no thanks. I did because I thought this was a great idea. I'll get on her and I'll climb her and I'll keep her from everyone else. It's amazing. Grant's luck and your luck. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a glass cannon network production and is an officially licensed partner of paizo incorporated giant slayer is copyright 2015 giant slayer and the pathfinder

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