The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 284 - Quake Me Home Tonight

Episode Date: June 29, 2021

A ferocious Taiga giant springs yet another trap on the heroes, but just when it seems they have her cornered, new foes enter the fray. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Order up for Damien. Hey, how did your doctor's appointment go, by the way? Did you ask about Rebelsis? Actually, I'm seeing my doctor later today. Did you say Rebelsis? My dad's been talking about Rebelsis. Rebelsis? Really? Yeah, he says it's a pill that...

That's right! Did you know it's also covered by most private insurance plans? Well, I'll definitely be asking my doctor if Rebelsis is right for me. Rebelsis. Ask your doctor or visit Rebelsis.ca. Order up for Rebelsis. Last week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. There comes a time in every Game Master's life where things just work out perfectly. The heroes avoided the perils of the chain.

Metra is going to rush up behind Lexington and Sir Will, grab them both, and Dimension Doris. Nice. Down the corridor here. But put themselves right where their enemy wanted them. What you hear from the back of the room is... A domino effect as the bookcases are tossed on top of the three of you. And though they struck back, Baron lights a rap and she smiles through all the hits.

Reinforcements were already on their way. All of you hear a lot of noise from behind you. Oh no. The adventure continues now. And sometimes when we touch, the honesty is too much. And I have to close my eyes and hide. Matthew! And sometimes That's all I got

I wanna hold you till I die Yeah, sorry I wanna hold you till I die Till we both lay down and cry I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides That's fun That's quite good, John That subsides That's fun. That's quite good, John. That is fun.

That's how you start an ep. That's how you start a sesh. That's how you start a sesh. Just a little skid-troid duet. Duet. I was going to say duo and duet. Yeah, I could tell. Duet.

They chewed on that one on the way out. It sounded like a glitch of the Matrix. Duet. Oh, man. They chewed on that one on the way out. It sounded like a glitch of the Matrix. Oh, man. Good times. They don't make music like that anymore, and they should. Well, they do. You just have to listen to something other than country.

That's not country, though. That's not country. That's not what I'm saying. He said they don't make music like that anymore, and I'm pointing out that Troy wouldn't know, because he doesn't expand his horizons anymore yeah that's uh let's see dan hill and the first question that comes up because you know google will ask questions what happened to dan i thought you'd say dan hill dead question what did happen today it just says he like divorced,

got divorced from Beverly Chapin and is with a new partner. Oh, good for him. Good for him. He was an established songwriter as well as a singer. He produced hit songs for such artists as George Benson and someone you might know and Matthew doesn't like, Celine Dion.

I love Celine Dion. Who doesn't like Celine Dion? People who hate Canadians for no good reason. Oh, and apparently he's incorrectly attributed to being married to Faith Hill, but he's not. Nope, it's Tim McGraw, baby. That's why people come to our podcast to hear rumors about Faith Hill and Dan Hill's marital history dispelled.

We will straighten out all Hill and Dan Hill's marital history dispel. We will straighten out all of your Dan Hill misconceptions in the first 20 minutes of every podcast we do. Dan Hill is also Canadian. Oh, so you're real. Born in Toronto. Toronto seems like a fun place. It's very nice. I'd like to go there.

I want to go back to Banff. Didn't we say that recently? Didn't we say that recently? Maybe. Didn't we just say that a few weeks ago that like we wanted to do a show in Toronto? My memory is, it's gone. Who are you? I don't know. Sometimes I don't know.

Sometimes I don't know. Sometimes when. How about the story behind Sometimes When We Touch? Ooh. A quote from Dan Hill about a woman he was interested in and in love with. She was interested in another man. So that was breaking my heart. So I thought I needed to write a song that would capture her and win her over. That would be so passionate in a sense that

she'd see that I'm the only guy for her, said Hill. Did it work? I wrote her the song and I played it over the telephone and she said, that song is just too intense for me. I'm going to the States with a football player. I wanna hold you to the fear in me that is really fucking i could totally sympathize with this woman yeah you're hearing that directed at you over the phone over the phone and it's not a song a song yet. It's not something that's like, oh, yeah, I know that song.

This is the first time anyone's hearing it. It'd freak me the fuck out, man. I would run off with a football player, anyone large enough to protect me from Dan Hill. That's what I would do. At times, I'd like to break you and drive you to your knees. See, what the fuck is that? Oh, my God.

At times, I'd like to break through and hold you endlessly. That is a threat. That is an imminent threat from Dan Hill. I'm going to break your knees, is what I'm hearing. I don't know what the laws are like in Toronto. I'm going to break your knees. I love you so much. I want to take a crowbar.

I'm going to get my $2,000 back. Why do you make me love you so much? Sounds like Faith Hill dodged a bullet. She sure did. Sounds like old Faith Hill made the right choice with Tim McGraw. Congrats to Faith Hill. Over Dan the Butcher Hill. Dan the Butcher Hill.

The Butcher of Toronto. The Butcher of Toronto. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh man Oh man Oh man Oh I love I love those songs Wasn't one of the Beatles in love With Eric Clapton's wife

Or vice versa There was one woman that was like Going out with all of them Yeah George Harrison Layla I think is about George Harrison's wife. I'm mixing up 10 different Beatles stories, but I think Clapton wrote Layla about... Patti Boyd. And is that supposed to be...

Was that George Harrison's wife? George Harrison's wife at the time of his death was Olivia Harrison, who's a lovely, lovely, nice person. Oh, you've worked with her. Patti Boyd married Eric Clapton after George Harrison. Okay, so I think Layla was about him. Yeah. In 1969, Clapton fell in love with Patty Boyd, the wife of one of his best friends. And so he wrote Layla, and she left Harrison for the clap.

That's what they called him. Oh, man. Came down with a case of the clap. She got herself the clap. Some people call him Slow Hand. I called him the clap. The clap. I don't think he's a very good person, from what him Slow Hand. I called him the clap. The clap. I don't think he's a very good person, from what I've heard.

No? Eric Clapton? Yeah. From what you've heard, are you saying you haven't met him? No, I've not. Is that strange? I've not met Dan Hill or Eric Clapton. But neither one of them sound very nice.

You know what I always found funny is he was in a band called Derek and the Dominoes. Why wasn't it Eric and the Dominoes? It always bothered me. Alliteration. Yeah. It's weird. But why was it Eric and the Ominos? That's a great point.

That's a much better point than Troy. Like, instead, if I wanted to call this Troy and the Glass Cannon Boys, I'd call it Gary and the Glass Cannon Boys? No, you call it Troy and the Glass Cannon Toys. That works, too. Well, how about Eric and the Glass Cannon Boys? No, you call it Troy and the Glass Cannon Toys. That works, too. Well, how about Eric and the Elites? Okay. Okay. I don't know.

Okay. I want to hold you. To the fear in me. Sometimes. Layla. Take it, Matthew. All right. Grab me on my...

Apparently, Patty Boyd inspired, If needed someone something for you blue leila bell bottom blues and wonderful tonight that's a woman yeah that's the kind of woman you want to take a crowbar to her knees oh my god didn't she write a book though didn't she write a book she i hope she did bet she did because she. Yeah, she was romantically involved with a whole generation of like... Yes. She is very, very pretty. Wonderful Today is the name of the book. My old boss used to work with Jim Morrison's ex-girlfriend.

But the witch, the feature... He used to talk about a witch in his life, and that was her. And she was just a weird... Not weird, but like a stranger old lady copywriter in the corner of the office all the time. And you knew that she inspired so many Doors songs. Unusual. Marrying your best friend's wife. Weird move.

Not cool, man. Got me on my knees, Matthew. Doom, doom. Where's a crowbar? Wouldn't you need them? All right, let's play a little Pathfinder. All right, fine. We're going to have some fun today.

And by we, I mean the listeners, because it's going to be miserable for us. Miserable for you, too? What, just because of all the work? No, yeah. I don't know. Somebody's got to come out of this happy, right? Somebody might, but it might not be anyone in this room. It's never as bad as you think somebody's got to come out of this happy rain somebody white but it might not be uh anyone in this room it's never as bad as you think it's gonna be that's true

that's true either you cheaply chaos or we survive maybe it'll be good we'll see wow matthew just boiled down any conflict in this show it's like either you tp gas or we survive well i mean that's pretty much what it comes down to maybe you'll pick off a pc maybe will that make you happy that's hard to make me happy that's certainly true where are you you still on the ethereal plane no i'm back you're back oh there you are oh you're back welcome back i think are you planning on targeting me with any kind of spell effect or attack didn't know where you are it's such a big map you're just this little speck in the rubble of the oh you moved for you moved in the

ethereal plane away from where you were earlier right no i i was only in the ethereal plane for the for the length of time for the bookcases to fall and then i moved after that got it still so baller i just love picturing that i just i i'm very inspired by kitty pride yeah how do you like that shaft graphic by the way pretty good shaft right that's world 20 that's like that shaft graphic, by the way? Pretty good shaft, right? That's rule 20. That's good. That shaft is one bad mother. Shut your mouth. I'm just talking about the shaft. We're having a good time.

He got Matthew. He's giggling. The chain went right after Lexington. Had a chance. The only person with spell resistance. If I had failed the SR check, the chain just goes away. But I did succeed. Started pulling you uh started pulling you remember what you rolled i rolled i think i rolled a natty 16 and i just had to roll a 10 or higher okay yeah i rolled 32 i think i was getting a plus 16 so

it's yeah it's a level 16 caster at least whoever made the uh change on it. That's what it is, right? Whoever, well, I don't know. Sometimes with magic items and stuff, they have a caster level 20. This isn't someone you'll ever meet. I don't know. This might be someone who's in the vicinity, which would be problematic.

Right. Yes, not heartwarming. Doesn't inspire confidence. That's what I was trying to say. Conspire. I can't. Conspire. I took aspire and confidence and turned it into conspire.

Oh, boy, I need a drink. It's 8 a.m. You start to get pulled towards the shaft, and then Metra, being the boss that she is, just says, nope, teleports you guys down the hallway. And then Nestor and Baron are kind of stymied because a spiritual ally appeared as well, and they can't do any damage to it.

Nestor couldn't do any damage to the chain. Doesn't take physical attacks. But Will's able to come up, touch it, dispel the ally. Metra disintegrates the chain. And then you start moving forward. And then the bookcases pile over all of you except Nestor. Metra steps to the ethereal plane. Aether step to get out of the way.

Baron and Sir Will are able to avoid it. Avoid getting buried. And the giant exposed herself by doing that, hoping that someone would get knocked. She was just waiting, waiting, waiting. Had a great chance, but unfortunately exposed her, and exposed her to Baron's bullets. Because Baron then proceeded to light her up. We finished last week with all of you rolling a high enough perception to know that something's coming. Who knows?

And that something is the ground rumbling beneath your feet. Hot. And it starts shaking pieces of walls and start falling off the ceiling because not only is someone coming,

something is coming, and it's an earthquake. What? Let me talk to you about earthquake. We're in the sky. How is there an earthquake in the sky? A highly local, an intense but highly localized tremor rips the ground. Everybody roll a reflex save to see if you fall down. Let's start there.

Oh, I crushed that reflex save. Oh, I'm on the wrong character. Hold on. I'm sure your bonus is still very high. What did we get? Round the table. Matthew? Hold on.

I'm going to use my swirling smoke tattoo to re-roll. What was we get? Round the table Matthew? Hold on I'm gonna use my Swirling smoke tattoo To re-roll What was the roll? Only slightly worse Than my Current roll My current roll Which is a 24

Ah okay Joey Joe? Also 24 For Sir Will 19 For the Lex That's Grantles

Shitty roll 28 28 And Skid Fingers crossed for the Lex. That's a shitty roll. 28. 28. And Skid. Fingers crossed on this one. I think it's a tweener. 38. 38.

You're all fine. For the first part. I'm surprised about Will. Yeah. The second part is, none of you can act for an entire round while the ground is shaking the third part of it i need everyone to roll a d100 and tell me if you roll under a 25

under a 25 one tell me if you're all 1 to 25 basically 70 67 47 you don't have to roll for 70. 67. 47. You don't have to roll for Lexington. Your arm's still mounted. Oh, Grant's shaky hands, I saw that. 37. Oh! 67, 47, 37! So as fissures begin to open up on the ground around you, none of you have to roll a reflex save

to avoid falling in to the fissures on the ground. Yeah, this is wild! That would have been great! Listen to that sound. Oh, that's awesome. How good is that? That's great. Yeah, so had you fallen in, you get another reflex save at a higher DC to avoid falling in. If you

fall in, it's a 40-foot drop. At the end of the spell, all the fissures grind shut, and you're basically trapped like you're in the bury zone of an avalanche without air. Oh, man. This would have been karmic punishment for Metroph after all the hungry pits that she's cast. Phenomenal sound effects.

This looks like it's extending all around the shaft, all the way up towards the edge of the bookcases. That is what you see and none of you can act until the next round. So Nestor cannot go. Sir Will cannot go. However, she can go.

No, no. Why? Because it's extremely localized. It's extremely localized. And she just... No. No! How terrifying would this be just no no how terrifying to have the earth rumbling beneath your feet and this thing

making its way towards you come on boom boom she just slides up and with this giant spear is she gonna go after will nester, or Baron? Was she not in the earthquake now? No. No, the earthquake ends right where you are, Sir Will. Got it. She is going to go after Nestor.

It's only one attack. Oh, no. Remember that plus two from last up. I thank you for it. Didn't you get a random attack last week, right? When she threw the rock? I did, no. Remember that plus two from last ep? I thank you for it. Didn't you get a random attack last week, right? When she threw the rope? I did, yeah. But then Sir Will bravely, foolishly, Nestor would probably think, took the damage on my behalf. Can she vital strike? Oh, she can't.

Okay. Went to a vital strike here. She winds up with that spear and just tries to stab you. Critical threat, Natty19. Oh my gosh. Oh my god. You know, I have my neon green on its perch, so I grabbed another die. I will try to confirm with that.

I think this is going to be a confirmed crit. Yeah. Thirty-two. With what? With a spear. And it was times three? Oh my god, I forgot she's got all these. It is times three.

And it was 19 to 20? Was it keen? You can't be keen, right? This is very bad. This is a vital strike crit. And she has She's got a critical build. Oh, so improved critical would double the threat range of her now in her case she has

well give me a fortitude save oh no oh god I regret doing this to skid now yeah this is natural one oh no okay well I went into this app assuming

that this uh giant would no longer be a problem. But what happens is on top of triple damage on a vital strike, she has blinding critical. And Nestor is permanently blinded. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh, God. Can be healed, obviously. Permanent is a strong word for this. This is a named character, Jojo.

Casey and Jojo. Oh, shit. Okay. And do I multiply it on the crit, or do I roll it that many times? You roll it that many times. Okay. I need a dice roller to do this. This is so bad.

I feel so bad for whatever person this is. Okay. I just need a dice roller to do this. Oh, this is so bad. I feel so bad for whatever person this is. Sorry, Kyle from Melbourne, Australia. Oh. Great. Holy crit. Hi, Kyle. Holy crit. Your weapon

strikes its foe with such precision and awe. This is a good time to remember that when you write these, you write them against us, too! It's hard to believe there wasn't some form of holy intervention in the strike. Interesting for Nestor. Double damage. Weird.

Double damage and a free channel positive energy from the point of your blow. The channel is considered to have selective channeling for the purposes of healing only PCs. Okay, so it's triple damage and it heals her. How much? 3d6. 3d6? Okay. Alright, that's not so bad. That could have been worse. Thanks,

Kyle. I legitimately need a calculator. It's so much damage. This is like barren level damage. So she winds up. Trip damages you for 105 points of damage. Okay. And then, as a swift action,

she moves the rock and throws it at Sir Will. Oh, okay. So where it landed before, she can just... Yeah, wherever it lands, she can, at the end of the swift action, just mentally move. Provoking from Sir Will?

I don't believe it provokes... It's a mental... Telekinetically... Yeah, no, it's... It's all mind. All right, here we go. Miss with the rock. But now she is up in Sir Will Nestor and Baron's face.

And she just did 105 points of damage to Nestor on one hit. Did you add just the crit die normally? I'm just reading a rules clarification from Jason Bowman. I did this before where I had the, you don't get to double it twice over. You just add the crit damage once. So like a 6th level character, for example, that has two attacks with a longsword would go 2d8 for the vital strike and then an additional 1d8 under standard crit rules for the crit damage by itself. Right. Okay. Give yourself 20 hit points back.

Oh, thank you. Yeah. Good catch, Grant. Thanks, Bowman. One other time I did vital strike like that and I left it on and I doubled it. Right. Okay. Give yourself 20 hit points back. Oh, thank you. Yeah. Good catch, Grant. Thanks, Pullman. There was one other time I did Vital Strike like that, and I left it on, and I doubled it. That is incorrect. Excellent catch. Thank you.

Thank you, Grant and Jason. Ground is shaking beneath you, and she just ambles up, and you're all like, like it was the 60s Batman show, like the camera's just shaking to show that you're all shaking. Yeah. And then it comes around to Metra. Can't act. Baron. Can't act. The earthquake stops. And around the corner,

a couple friends join the fight. Oh, man. Let me just measure here. Oh, Metra. Good thing you got some mirror images. Rushing down the hallway at Metra is this guy. Oh.

Oh. Oh, my God, it's terrifying. It's like a warthog. Oh! What is happening? Away, warthog! He's got great taste in belts, though. I love that bone belt he's wearing.

So it's this weird-looking, yeah, like a huge bipedal warthog. Kind of looks like a defensive lineman. Big tusk sticking out. It's got a lion's mane over its head, but very pig-like features. And then, just for shits and giggles, right on the other side of

you, rising up from the ground is an enormous earth elemental. Kind of looks like that. Oh my god. So Metra is surrounded by them and they're going to take one attack each. First this

pig dude. Let me check out his reach John. Yep, he's going to go ahead and attempt to bite you. Actually no, claw does more damage. 29. Yeah, no. Claw does more damage. 29. Yeah, that hits. Roll to hit the mirror. How many are you?

There's eight images in one of me, so there's nine. Oh, gross. All right, so a d10. Rerolling on 10. Nine hits. That's a three, so one image is gone.

And then... You have a habit of, like, saying... Oh, I get it. I know, yeah. The... I got it the uh uh earth elemental john this is another huge creature by the way uh is going to try and slam you uh yeah 30 to slam and now there's eight of you now there's eight total but eight total okay great we're not so it'll hit on a D8.

On an eight. Ah, God, I'm going to be great. So much damage. Two. So takes out two images. And some new friends have been added to the party. The earthquake has stopped. Three huge creatures are in the fight. And it is Nestor's turn.

I just hang out, I guess. I don't know. I got a chance. Blind. 3d6 for myself. 14 hit points back. It's a blind archer, right? Yeah.

What are his options? Are you disallowed from taking a ranged attack at the 50% chance? Yeah, I guess I could. Yeah, I mean. But I'm incurring, too. Yeah, you would incur, but you can take a shot at a 50% mischance. But yeah, incurring right now after you just took 85 points of damage.

Is this square standable, Troy, or that one? I'll tell you what's standable. Everyone except the two that are abutting the wall. Oh, so you can back up. Oh, no, I'm sorry.

The two that are behind Baron are standable. So Nestor could take a diagonal step behind Baron. Oh, wait, can you take a five-foot step in difficult terrain? Yeah, I don't think I can. That's not difficult terrain. But is it if I'm blind? Oh. Man, there's a couple people listening right now.

They're like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. You can do this. You can't do that. How do they not know this after five years? Five foot step while blind. All right.

Blind creatures must make any creature with a speed of... Must make a jaw on check. Does anyone... Everyone should be jaw on check. Does anyone? Everyone should be fiercely looking. I'm looking. Joe's just eating cookies. What are we looking at? Can you take a five foot step when you're blind?

When you're blind. Does it say you can't? It should just be, you must make a DC 10 acrobatics check to move faster than blah, blah, blah. Yeah, just look up the blind condition. It should be in there. Take five foot step. You can move five feet in any round when you don't perform any other movement doesn't provoke you take five you can take a foot step as long as your movement isn't hampered by difficult terrain or darkness

uh any creature with a speed yeah there's nothing that says you can't well i mean it's effective darkness yeah it's that right sense to me i, it's tough because not only am I recently blinded, which for any of us would be for the rest of my life, but there was also an earthquake recently. So there's fissures all over the ground that we didn't fall into. Right. So I can't see myself being able to take a five-foot step. Yeah, I'd say it isn't around this pretty substantial argument for RAI. If can't take a five foot step because it's too dark why can you take a five foot step when you're blind it's it's dark for me yeah so uh you know you could roll the acrobatics

check to move five feet right but then i only get the single attack which will probably yeah right and you also don't know what our combat Um, man. Um, I'm just... Hold to see if somebody can take it off of you. Uh, I, just to keep things moving, I'm just going to do a full attack from where I'm standing. Alright, let me take my chances. You can throw down an attack of opportunity here.

Uh, I don't get vital strike for that, so let me make sure it's off. It is. Alright, so she goes to stab out at you with a spear. 40 to hit. Yes, that is a hit. Okay. That is going to be damage-wise not bad.

22 points of damage. Okay. That hurt for sure. Okay. I am first attack, many shot. That is a 32 to hit. 32 while she's raging.

Is it a hit? 99 on the missed chance. All right. That is going to be a hit. And that is 57 points of damage. Okay. Oh, she's in bad shape. There you go, nest.

And your arrows are still magical. They're still magical. If she has DR, the DR would not apply to my shots here. Second attack. Natural one. Oh, no. I mean, like you said, you're blind. I'm blind.

Oh, for fuck's sake. 31 on the confirmed. Oh, not a confirmed. Okay. Just by the skin of your jaw. I know. I'm like, ugh. All right.

Third attack. That is a 30 to hit. 30 hits. And that's a miss with the blind roll and a miss on the third. Okay. So the 50% chance saved her for my second hit. All right. All right. Oh, God.

It's Sir Will's turn. Sir Will, you now see there's multiple enemies. You can't see around the corner, but you hear this like... And then you see this huge... There's a warthog man here! Earth elemental, this elder earth elemental. Moving rocks. Oh, so insane.

Massive moving rocks. Okay. It's a tough encounter. Yeah. He's going to say, Lexington, get me in front of them! Okay It's a tough encounter Yeah He's gonna say Lexington Gotta be in front of them And he's going to

Dash to the side To get in front of Nestor To just sort of Put himself between The creature and Nestor Are you rolling acrobatics To avoid attack of opportunity? Cause you don't know

What her combat jawn is Well no you would know Cause you saw Cause she didn't take attacks on the other attacks. Didn't mean she wasn't using it. Okay. Then I'm not going to take a five-foot step, and I'm going to... Well...

The move action is separate. Yeah, I mean, it's a five-foot step. It doesn't matter. It's a five-foot step because it's Lexington's five-foot step. So he'll's a five-foot step It doesn't matter, it's a five-foot step Because it's Lexington's five-foot step So he'll take a five-foot step And I will draw out Roselight From its sheath The blade swings into the air

And he's like, I smite thee And he swings at the creature While mounted Okay 30, sorry 41 We smite thee! And he swings at the creature while mounted. Okay. 30. Sorry. 41.

Whoa! There you go. 41 hits. And he does 23 points of damage. And she falls. Oh, my God! Yes! Ooh!

Suck it, evil creature! And she did have, she's got quick reflexes, which allows one additional attack of opportunity per round. Why't you take it i was just saving it for baron fair enough uh amazing i didn't think you'd hit okay so the only thing i was questioning there is drawing out the weapon i think that i can move lexington and draw the weapon and take an attack because i think it's my move equivalent action and then attack action, whereas Lexington moves, can move on his own. So I think it's fine. Yeah, it's fine.

He'd be alive if you like. Yeah, I don't really care enough to scribble over that type of rule. Okay, that was Sir Will, and unfortunately she doesn't get her turn. She never got her full attack off, so now I can tell you. One, two, three, four attacks plus the rock so equivalent to five attacks if i didn't have uh power attack on it would be plus 29 plus 24 plus 19 plus 14 for 3d6 plus 24 damage wow wow yeah with vital strike it's even more so um sorry i forgot something i also want a swift action lay on hands uh myself

so i'm gonna do that it's a swifty that's a swifty okay uh and heal 24 hit points okay ah i'm gonna miss her she was cool it is metra's turn at the top of a new round you have defeated this taiga giant if you don't forget you you might know something about this Taiga giant. If you think back to your notes, it's been a long time. Oh, is this her? You've read about a Taiga giant. Yes. She's one of the bosses, right? Nalvia. It's Nalvia,

the twin sister of Nalbor. Are those Taiga giants? Taiga giant named Ser Dassa. Oh, and someone named Nalvia. So there was this Taiga named Ser Dassa. Maybe that was Ser Dassa? Check, and someone named Navia. So there was this tiger named Sir Dassa. Maybe that was Sir Dassa? Check her wallet! Check her wallet! Says Delaware. State of Delaware.

Check her... Yeah, Sir Dassa. Jones, Sir Dassa. Perhaps this is Sir Dassa. Metro, what do you want to do? This fight is far from over now that you've got this weird fucking warthoggy animal to your south and then this elder earth elemental to your north.

Yeah. Got some images to protect you. But for how long? But for how long indeed. So. You know what? Let's have a little fun. Yes.

Okay. This whole thing started with a chain. Let's have another kind of chain. Ooh. Ooh. Metra, Emperor Palpatine style, reaches up her fingers. Yeah. And some chain lightning erupts from her.

Oh, yeah. Do you want to roll a concentration to avoid the attack of opportunities? Yes. Plural. I will also roll to cast defensively. Okay. Let's look at my bonus. Check out that bone.

This one might be tough. Chain Lightning, right? It's a pretty high-level spell. For the concentration? What is the DC of these? 15 plus double the spell level. 15 plus double the spell level versus the caster level check? Yes.

And plus four if you have concentration combat casting. Yeah, well, that'll be baked into her level. So it's 31 on the concentration. Do you see 31 on the concentration deck and I have a plus 21 to concentration? It's a 50% chance. Come on. It's a little better

than 50-50. Shut up! Alright, cast defensively I get and now it's full of concentration and now this is to no no cast defensively you're fine that's what you did right cast defense casting defensively means you can cast the spell without provoking an attack of opportunity right yeah it is then successful you don't have to roll twice to cast a spell yeah that's what that is you're not concentrating to maintain an effect or anything if you want to cast a spell. Yeah, that's what that is. You're not concentrating to maintain an effect or anything. If you want to cast a spell without provoking any attacks of opportunity,

you must make a concentration check. DC 15 plus double... Yeah, that is your concentration check, is casting defensively. Okay. You lose the spell if you fail, so you're all right. You're all right, LaRusso. It was a natty 17 anyway. All right, so I need each of... It was a natty 17.

I need each of them to roll a reflex save. Oh, no. Oh, no. I gotta see it. Wait, you can get both of them. I can't with every night. I need each of them to roll a reflex save. Oh, no. Oh, no. I gotta see it. Wait, you can get both of them? Yeah. Yeah, chain lightning. Oh, it chains to each other.

I'm thinking of like a line of lightning. I could have gotten all three if you hadn't killed them. If you hadn't killed them. Sorry. So sorry. The named creature to the south rolled a 17. Oh, that's a fail. That's not good.

And the very slow-moving earth elemental rolled a 6. Does it have resistances to lightning, though, being an earth elemental? I'm looking at that right now. Interesting you should say that. Any type of DR. Teach us, pet! It would go right through DR where it's electric. Does it have any energy resistance?

Oh, God. Is it a huge earth elemental? He said an elder. It's an elder, but it is size huge. No, it is not. It doesn't say it, at least on the snap. Wait, are you looking up elder earth? I was looking up huge earth elemental. Chita!

Okay, we're good. Give me full damage. 68 points of damage to both of them. Oh! Wow! God, she's so powerful! Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care for that. Okay.

And then Medra is going to take a five-foot step. Which way, though? I will move... In difficult terrain? Wow. Oh. That is true. It is difficult terrain.

You're working your way up. He's on fire tonight. You're working your way up. Well, okay. Assistant GM today will be Grant Berger. You know what? Roll that concentration check. He's right.

No, he's right. So instead I will use a... No, that's not bothered with that. Five foot John. So instead I will use the quick and mad magic rod. I will cast defensively. I'll roll. I get it automatically.

And I will disappear. Very cool. I just got a text saying that my hard copy of the Dune RPG just arrived at my house. That's exciting. It was fun. Six months in the waiting. Alright, so what'd you do? I went invisible. I'm gone. Good for you.

Gone, baby, gone. She could see invisibility. That would have helped. But I think it's still gonna help our friends here. Let's see what they do, but right now it's Baron's turn. Oh, you know what? And then once I'm invisible, I will move. Oh.

Oh, right. Where? You don't know. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. All right, don't forget, double movements there for the difficult terrain. It's fine. Is that where you go?

No. There you go. I'm going to see if they can... That's where I go. Okay. Oh, the Earth Elemental might have some sense. There you go Wait I'm gonna see if they can That's very good Okay Oh the earth elemental Might have Yeah

Some sense He's gonna take an attack Of opportunity Because he has Tremor sense Oh Ooh Interesting

Here we go Ah 34 Yep Alright How many are you still Seven now There's now seven

But you still have to Roll a 50% mischance Oh yeah Alright 50% mischance Oh yeah Alright 50% mischance 51 or higher 10 Let's make sure those are both d10s

You may continue Alright so Metro goes invisible Moves you realize that this thing's got Tremor sense so it can sense you Can pinpoint Your exact location What would the knowledge checks be on these guys? Earth elemental so it can sense you, can pinpoint your exact location, but it's still 50% chance. What would the knowledge checks be on these guys?

Earth elemental would be probably a can. I think it's knowledge nature, right? I would say it might be planes. Yeah, I think it's planes. Yeah, because you're calling it from the plane of Earth, and then the other John is a local. All right, I'll do...

It's okay, never mind. No, no, you can do some. I'll do the planes then. All right. It's probably not going to get me much. You think I definitely need that 50% mischance if I can pinpoint its exact location? Yes. Okay.

Because it's invisible. I mean, it's not like tremor sight or blind sight. It's sense. Right, right. It's sense. It can know its location. That doesn't necessarily... Its location is just a square.

Okay, so arguably, I shouldn't even have gotten the AOL. It's possible you could. It's arguable, I think, because you can't take an AOL if... Oh, no! Yeah, you couldn't, because you can't take an AOL if it has concealment. Or, no, I'm sorry. You can't take an AOL if it has cover. You can't do sneak attack if it has concealment, but I think

you can take an AOL if it has concealment, which is effectively what being invisible is. It's 50% concealed from you. Yeah. So I think you could have taken that. I missed anyway, so it doesn't matter, but Colin? 18 on the knowledge planes. 18 on the knowledge planes! Obviously I already told you that's an Elder of the

Elemental, because I think it's fun for you to know that. Is it 18 total? Yeah. I can't tell you anything else. Okay. Don't ever ask me again. Baron. Am I able to tell... No! Due to my year's worth of combat now,

whether or not a creature this large should be affected by difficult terrain? You would think a creature this large would have some sort of earth mastering. It's like the perfect creature to be in this type of situation. And you also know that it just appeared there like it had glided

under the ground and slid up. Knocked over a bunch of books or whatever on the way out. Yeah, just books flying and Kool-Aid man from the floor. Oh yeah! Oh yeah. Okay, then Baron's gonna stay where he is, give Nestor

some continued cover. Was thinking about healing Nestor, but... Can you de-blind him? I cannot. I need to remove blindness, deafness, and I don't think we have that scroll. I don't think anyone has it. Yeah, Sir Will has it. But he doesn't have it on him.

Right, right, right. He has to pray for it. It's at school! All right. The dog ate my scroll! Was it the worst? I left it at the cathedral! Damn it! I just gunk, gunk, gunk! all right the dog ate my scroll wasn't the worst i left it at the cathedral close up on your night table in the cathedral wasn't the worst like when you're when you

forgot something in your locker at school and like it was the random weekend when there was no event at school so the school was completely closed and you're like i can't get it till monday yeah i didn't keep anything in my locker except one of those wendy's hand puppets of the wendy's girls and like Mayor McCheese. I used to love those. I don't know why. I'd always pull them out at parties. Have little shows at school. Hello! The little Mayor McCheese.

How did that guy get elected? It was all just a hamburger for a head. It's true. I think he was stuffing the ballot boxes. Who is Mayor McCheese? You don't know Mayor McCheese?

Oh my god. He's the Mayor McDonald then. His top priority is stopping Grimace from oh no not Grimace the hamburger. The hamburger.

Yeah. I think he said Wendy's. No. Well no he had the Wendy's puppet but then he had the other puppet as well.

He was cross platform. Here comes the first attack. 18 on the die. Let me know will I be adding any additional damage dice? It's not a Chaotic Earthy Elemental, is it?

No. It shouldn't be. No, it's not. Elementals are neutral, usually. Do I have knowledge from Metra to add Bane to this, or no? Did you share that with us, as to what this was? Technically, I didn't do it until after I was invisible. What?

Well, you can still talk. Then I'll review my location. It doesn't matter. Oh, okay. So I don't know. Yeah, she didn't pass. Okay, great. She didn't pass.

Perfect. That will be 27 points of damage then. Okay, and that was obviously still against touch, right? Yes. And does your gun bypass uh dr it should it's magical if it's dr x with a hyphen nothing gets through except energy that's what i thought yeah so it doesn't all get through but you do hit it would lawful get through no why don't you just tell me nothing gets through I'm pretty sure, except energy.

Yeah, you have no reason to think. You've fought enough elementals in this campaign to know that, like, axiomatic isn't going to make a difference. Great. Okay, so second attack. Not like a demon. Misfire. Oh! Overdue.

Oh, God! Overdue. Nestor's blind. Is it a misfire? Was it a one or just a misfe? It was a two. It's a two. The poor man's one. You spent three

grit points, too, on that last... Yeah, but I have seven. I'm not scared about that. So I have enough in reserve to clear it. But yeah, that's essentially the end of the turn. I want a five-foot step, but I really can't go anywhere safer than where I am. I would be blocking Sir Will if I move further north, and I'm going to stay where I am in front of one nest of coin.

Very good. Very, very good. These guys are huge, so they're not going to be bothered by this terrain situation. Let's start with the earth elemental. He's going to go ahead and just glide under the ground and pop up right next to the three of you.

Oh, jeez. Oh, man. And then he's going to... I think he's going to go to a place that I haven't been in a long time, but I hear it's really nice this time of year. Oh, no. You might know it as Cleveland! Let me throw in that Cleve AC penalty. It's not nicest time of year there. It's never

nicer. It's Cleveland. First attack will be at... This is intelligent. Not great. It's going to be at... Barron. It's going to be at... Barron It's going to be at Barron. Like, Nestor is the easy one to guarantee the hit so that the second one comes through, but he doesn't know that.

He's an earth elemental. So I'm going to go for Barron and then swipe up to either Nestor or Sir Will. I'm not going to do shit. Well, I don't know. It's not a giant, so 31 is a miss. Oh, nice. I don't get to go to cleveland beautiful um if you hit i can make a second so i don't get the cleve ac penalty because i missed uh all right so

he tries to fucking cleave and he's never going back to cleveland again which is what everyone says after they go to cleveland sorry nick cleveland. He would be from Cleveland. Okay, let's talk about this, John. Okay, what's his reach, Sitch? Pretty sneaky, sis. He's going to go ahead and come up. Goosey-goonk. Goosey-goonk.

Goosey-goonk. Karen is in the thick of it. Yeah, really. What is this thing? Baron's got a sick AC. What is he going to do? Oh, man. That would be so amazing, but I know you'll pass. So I'm

just going to do a vital strike here with a claw. Come on. Everybody's got vital strike here with a claw. Come on. Everybody's got vital strike now. Every single character. I think that the author of book six is a huge vital strike fan. Loves it. Must be.

His name is Vital McStrikinson. His father invented the feat. Oh, that would be so cool if your first name was Vital. I think it's Dick Vital Strikes. Now, I can tell you right now, Baron, this does have the giant subtype, so I need that AC. And this is going to be a 38. Miss. Oh, wow.

I had a feeling. It was a decent roll, but where it does have the giant subtype. Joe looks befuddled. I also have a blessing of protection on. Do I have a bonus to my A sizzle? No didn't get to touch you you moved away i was gonna when we didn't see anyone else on the battlefield i think you went ahead before the giant got revealed i was gonna touch you and give you the bonus the ac as well got it because i have six it's a level one spell i can give it out to everyone oh that's cool i just need time during the battle to do so. Yeah, everybody's got to be together. Shit.

Okay. That would have been great. Vital strike, Zoni. But no, no luck. Okay. It is poor Nestor's turn. Nestor. Yeah, he really doesn't know what's happening.

I think he is based on his sighted knowledge of where he was before he lost his sight. I think he's going to take a move action, move five feet back, fur to the wall away from these creatures. And I'm going to do a perception check to see if I can note the location of the earth elemental. That is a 30. I'm going to say you can see it. Okay. Yeah. I mean, you can't see it, but you can sense its location.

I know where it is. Yeah. All right. I'm going to take one attack against, and I can't study target either, so this is tough. But I'm going to take one attack at the elemental. That is a 28. 28 hits. Okay.

It's a big target. All right. And that is 22 points of damage. Now just roll a 50% miss chance. Oh, right. It's a miss. 05, 005. 005, 007.

Second least popular nemesis. All right, so Nestor... That's your turn? That's it. Sir Will. This is a really bad situation. You're surrounded. Luckily, the Tiger Giant's gone, because then it would have been...

It would have been game over. What is this other creature that isn't the elemental? Roll a knowledge local. Does it count as an action and force to do? I don't have that. So, I mean, it's a flesh and blood giant that's... What is it?

It just has claws and... Here's what I'll tell you. Does it seem intelligent or does it seem like an animal? I can't... It's an enormous, stooped creature with powerful limbs, a mane of gritty brown fur, and a ferocious, tusked underbite. It appears to be

an intelligent creature, you know, maybe not crazy intelligent, but its strength is its biggest selling point? I don't know. It's grotesque. It's human. Humanoid. Giant-y subtype. But I need a knowledge local to give you the information you seek. Okay. I am, Sir Will is going to ride...

Oh, God, this is so terrible. So, here's the problem. I can't do any damage to the elemental. Just can't do it. And Baron's positioning makes it impossible for you to get any sort of attack off. You could, like, trot up to the other thing. Right. Is it just positioning that's the problem?

No, no. I can't deal damage to an element. I'm not strong enough to get over its DR, basically. I'm assuming it's got DR 10. Um, and I just can't get over that damage. Um, without, uh, because it's neutral.

You know what I mean? Like, if it's an evil creature, I'm fine. Uh, so that's why I was wondering if the other creature is evil, uh, or if it's just another fucking animal, you know? It's like a really weird little sore point. I could tell you if I could see. Right.

And I don't know if I want to waste a whole round just fucking detecting evil while Baron gets eaten up. Jeepers. He's hard to hit, though, at the moment. Baron. Yeah. Yeah, he's way harder to hit than I am right now. That's true.

There's also... I think there's a pretty good chance that thing's evil. But it's a chance. It looks pretty evil. It looks evil to me. Yeah. I mean, you can... There is a space underneath that rigging.

Yeah. I'm just going to fall back and try to... So, is this here an occupiable square, Troy? For us? Which color? For a halfling? No. No?

No. Those four that the gantry is on are not. Just the two south of Baron were the winches. Jeez. Okay. entry is on or not. Just the two south of Baron where the winch is. Um, jeez. Okay, then... It's tricky. It's really tricky.

Uh... Oh, my God. All right. It's like what my son says when he's doing puzzles. He's like, that's a tricky one, Dad. It's like he's asking a question that you had.

You know what, Dad? That's a tricky one. This is a tricky one, Dad. Doing like 60-piece puzzles now. Oh, yeah. He loves them. All right. I'm just going to risk it here.

I'm going to provoke from both enemies to get into melee with this fucking guy. Oh, man. It's just so disgustingly awful. Yes, it is. Yeah, they got crazy reach, Sony. So let's start with the Elementals. We're all jammed up here. Slam.

He gets a little bonus to hit you because he's cool. Here we go. You got good AC, though. Shit for rolls. So 35. Yeah, that hits. That does hit. I'm tired of you grinding this shit into me.

I'm very fucking angry. Garbage rolls, though. It's a really bad. 35. It's a really bad... 35. It's a really bad... Go read on a forum what a 15th level character's AC should be. Do you know how much time you can save in a given podcast by just not having them roll for these attacks? It's having to automatically hit, which they do anyway.

It'd be fun. Yeah. 19 points of damage from Earthy. And then... Oh, sorry. And the other guy I would have a slight bonus, too, because I am going to smite evil. That's the risk I'm taking.

Okay. He's going to go and try to claw you. Is he evil? Yes, he is. No, he is not, according to the... I mean, just done. Let me just make sure, because sometimes Hero Lab will say one thing, but it's because it just brings up...

What a perfect encounter for me. Two giant animals, basically. Right. They're just animals. Yeah. Just imagine if you had been unseated. Yeah. I was unseated at the turning of the sun.

It would be better now. It wouldn't matter. I want to give it to you if he is. Because it's so jammed in. I can't charge. There's no room to charge. Everything's difficult terrain. No, he's not evil.

Straight out of the book. So, here we go. Claw. Oh, that's a miss. With a 27? That is a miss. Okay. Sorry, what was the first one again?

Damage-wise? Damage-wise? I'll tell you right now. 19 points of damage. Thank you. Okay. The power attack wasn't on. You lucky? And he woke up. Trotting past Baron like, you know, excuse me, Baron.

And then get up right next to this hideous creature and just start slash, slash, slash, swinging away at it with Rose Light. One attack. Make it work. Making three attacks. Why do you get three? Because I got a feat. Oh.

You paid the feat tax. Paid the feat tax. Gotta pay the troll, troll, troll. The agony of the feat tax. It's called Mount mounted skirmisher. If your mount can move, it's full speed, and you get a full attack action. Wow. So he's going to trot up.

It's still going to do nothing. All right, here we go. First swing is a 37 to hit. That's a big old yacht. For seven points of damage. What? I tell you, dude, they're're neutral it's so brutal he's level 15 right uh and then a 26 to hit he's a little man 26 he has a tiny little sword it's

no bigger than a dagger what was the first to hit 36 okay 27 misses 27 misses and then uh 29 And 29. Miss on the third attack. I mean, this is, I was a natural 18, so. This is not happening. This is so bad. This is remarkable. I could stay up for a while if Baron can take him down, I think, but. Yeah, Baron is going to have to save our butts here. Who tends to come in and save the day in situations when all hope is lost?

Metra Narn. Yes! Top of the order, Metra Narn. Yes. Top of the order, Metra. I was really hoping you weren't going to say that. I'm not doing. We're all okay now. It's Metra's turn. Don't worry.

Metra will save us surely. You all turn and look. She's not there. She's gone. She left us. She left. All hope is lost. A treacherous witch.

You look like an arrow slit and you see Metro's car pulling up. Is that her Ford Fiesta? I think it is. I thought she was leasing an Acura. She's borrowing her mom's car. Here's my dream for Matthew. Are you going to tell me what I'm going to do during this turn? No, do your thing and I'll tell you my dream after you take your turn.

No, tell me your dream. My dream is not on this turn. Sometime during this con, I want to see you crit one day. Have you crit yet on a Ray of Disintegration? Oh, wow. I mean, I don't think I've crit. They failed the save, which is much the same. Right, but it's a touch attack, right?

It is a touch attack. These guys are going to have a crazy fortitude save because they're giants and they're not earth elemental. So strategically, that's not my favorite option. So I could deal some damage. I could try to impair them, let you guys get out of there. It's a couple of, so. Does it help you if we stay aligned in a manner to where you can touch us all? Should we continue to organize ourselves that way?

Not really, because I've got to get to you, and they are blocking every conceivable square. Got it. That I, between, like, they have completely cut me off to you, so I'd have to teleport there. Understood. Got it. Yeah, Metro's on the other side of this crashed-over bookcase, all that difficult terrain. And then we're wedged between that, these creatures, and the shaft. It's tough.

All right. It sucks. Here is what I'm going to do, because it's Baron. You haven't gone this round, so you're going to... I have not. Feasibly, you're going to light somebody up, though you're going to have to risk an attack of opportunity to do it. Alright, let's do this. Well, I am misfired, so I'm probably going

to take this round off. That's right, he's misfired! He's got to take a round to clear his jaw! Okay. Alright, then I'll deal damage to keep us moving. Will you?

Will you? Yes. I shall need both of them to please roll a reflex save. Ah, I've told you too much. Here we go. First one is the guy downstairs there. Ooh, 24? That does pass.

Okay. And then Earthy, need a good roll. And I rolled a natural one. Nice. There we one. Nice. There we go. Okay. So Earthy takes 43 points of damage from a little chain lightning. Okay.

And then it arcs back to deal 21 points of damage to the Warthog Man. Twin. Thunder. So that does it. Oh, jeez. Oh, jeez. Oh, my God. Fire lightning.

Sir Will's on fire. And he just goes tumbling over the edge of the thing. The chap. He likes it to catch fire. Panic. Run to the chap. Sir Will, you're dangerously close to that. Just pit into nowhere.

What else you got, Metro? I become close to that. Just pit into nowhere. Yeah. What else you got? I become visible when I cast that spell. Yes. And then I will use the quick and magic rod to cast another spell on Warthog, dude. Got a roll range touch tech. You're serious. That's going to be a 16 against touch. Let me see.

He's a big dude. Let me switch to him. Oh, yeah, that's going to hit yeah that's gonna hit you take 11 points of strength damage from a race no save uh it's portitude for half damn it okay big difference between 11 and 5. That's still good. It's probably going to be half. Oh, 21? Yeah, so half. Oh, shit. Damn. So five points.

Actually, it's a strength penalty. Five points of strength. How long is it the rest of his life? One round per level up to the rest of his life, hopefully. Or hours. So it's just a minus two, minus two. On which creature? The warthog.

The warthog, John. I don't know why you would do that to him. He's not evil. Minus five to strength. Wow. Strength is his favorite ability. Man, 11 would have been... 11 would have been real sweet.

Now his strength went from a 36 to a 31. I rolled a six on a 1d6 plus five. Dude, if that 11 goes... It's a difference between minus two to hit and minus five to hit yeah that is a huge yeah his strength went from a 36 to a 31 oof uh but i mean fortitude is going to be probably the thing they're best at yeah yeah is what it is and the metro will move but that's going to be the case usually for most high strength characters you know that you're trying to almost evil most of the stuff that we're fighting here is yeah anything with high strength characters, you know, that you're trying to, almost, most of the stuff that we're fighting here is,

yeah, anything with high strength, that would be useful against, they will have high fortitude. Right. My other option was to do a hold monster, but, same thing.

Sabers suck, and they're gonna, that's Will, so this guy probably doesn't have a crazy will. Well, I love a hold monster. What? Well,

it was, you had a hold monster in there? Yeah, but it could have failed, and I could deal a bunch of damage with the chain lightning, so I figured if Baron's not going to be able to deal damage, we've got to keep getting these guys closer to death. You know, I'm not angry or anything,

but I just sense a lot of risk aversion from Joe and Matthew towards save or sucks. More like withhold monster. No, no, no, that's not what I'm saying. They're just very risk averse, and I understand it. That's smart a lot of times. You want to go with things that'll definitely work and you you work with those outcomes versus you know not having a turn the longer we stay in combat with these guys

especially where you guys are pinned to this wall yeah the higher the chances of one of you going down or dying is nester is blind and he's got so basically everything he hits is going to be 50 percent to miss you have to take a round to clear your gun. You have to take a whole round? Well, it's a move equivalent action. But you can take a shot. You can take one shot. It's not worth it.

It's better to take a five-foot step away, get out of range of, like, the boars provoke range. So it's like we have to deal damage to these things, or we're never going to get out of this. And I could get... Based on where I'm positioned, I can't get you, get you so i can't like pull any of you out so yeah okay not a lot i can do to change the battlefield baron it's your turn it sounds like you not wanting to provoke it's pretty risk averse yeah it does um well it's not based on a role though

you know it's not true it's not based on having a chance to do something cool it's based on my role uh yes you're 45 ac so baron will take a five foot step diagonally towards the feet of the fallen taiga giant hopefully moving himself out of the range of at least the crazy giant but not evil creature with a warthog's face that is haranguing sir willamette at the moment. When I was a young warthog. Now you're 10 feet away from the elemental, 15 feet away from the warthog. Correct. So Baron will use a move equivalent action and spend a point of grit

to remove the broken condition caused by the misfire from his gun. He still has three remaining after that. What happened to that spider thing it's only on the other pistol oh right um and uh baron will do knowledge checks necessary to help out with both of these creatures as the rest of his turn give you that knowledge uh local and knowledge planes on the other guy knowledge local on the I can only do knowledge local

so I rolled well 19 for 24 this is a mountain troll mountain troll it looks like a troll it's hairy big ass mountain troll this is the source of the earthquake

this guy did it not the elemental. Not the elemental. He cast this on his way in to soften you up. The every generation, because it's a troll, and what's actually going to help you if anything. Is he the source of

the elemental? Yes. He is the source. Kill the troll! Kill the troll. Kill the troll, says Baron. Oh, okay. that's good to know baron you still got your standard you want to do anything no i don't you don't you used it to clear his gun i thought that was i did a five foot step and a move equivalent so i believe that five foot step takes up my move action okay okay unless i can five foot step quick clear with move equivalent and shoot but i don't think Takes up my move action. Okay. Okay.

Unless I can five foot step quick clear with move equivalent and shoot, but I don't think we've ever run it that way before. You can't do that. Yeah. Okay. Okay. It's their turn. Metro is visible now. Hey there.

I see you. Hi. Oh, man. I really want to rend one of you, though. Your ACs are so high Nestor is like smartly tucked away Back there Sir Will is just like

Putting himself between Nestor and the troll Yeah, bravely Alright, I'm going to do a full attack on Sir Will Let me just see Man, I'd love to power attack But it just doesn't seem smart with your All your situations here. So, all right, let's start with the bite.

25 misses with the bite. Got to hit with both claws to go to Rentown. First claw. Oh! Oh! Sitting on it and then fell again. 25. So maybe one claw attack.

Natural 20. This is all the earth elemental? No this is the troll So miss on the first bite Miss on the second First claw nat 20 On the last claw Let's see if I confirm

I think I got you buddy 36 And it is a named character God you fucking people You fucking people. You fucking people. Who are you mad at? The creators of the game?

Yeah, I think he's mad at Jason. The world itself? The Patreon subscribers who supply these prints? It's very unclear who you're mad at. Trolls? Okay. Yeah, trolls. I mean, this is so scary. These are so bad.

Zachary from Middletown, Connecticut. Heisenberg's Uncertainty. Oh, no. You strike the foe with such force that you break down time and space, opening a short-lived wormhole, double damage, and you may cause any two characters, friend or foe, currently in initiative order to instantaneously switch places. This does not impact initiative order or provoke attacks of opportunity.

Readied actions no longer make sense and are wasted. So, yeah, basically he double damage and then he can switch any two people in initiative order to his advantage. Oh, that's interesting. It's going to be 22 points of damage. And then switch people in this floor. I mean, this is just brutal.

So the elemental is going to go next. Huh. It doesn't really help. Do you know what I mean? Like if I move

Metra and Sir Will Metra's going to go Sir Will. It's actually I think pretty lucky for us. I think it would be way better for the PCs to get this crit

because if you had a caster or a healer or what you know what I mean like you could really make some a great combo happen but these two don't really have a combo they could pull off yeah and it's like moving baron in initiative order

like that you want you want to move the last person that went but all i'd be doing is making him yeah yeah sooner it doesn't work for you yeah because basically the earth elemental didn't go if the earth elemental had already gone and it was like metra's turn next or something you could swap have it go again or something. Yeah. Yeah, I don't see a configuration unless I'm totally missing it, which is possible. So I will not take advantage of it. Well, I mean, I could move Sir Will to right before the troll

and it just delays when he gets to go. Yeah, I can't see it, like what the good option would be for you. Oh, you know what the good option is? I move the troll and Nestor with a troll and Sir Will. Because then the troll gets to go again this round. Okay. Yeah.

And then you don't. So it's basically the crit is I lose my turn. Yeah. I switch the troll and Sir Will. But it's his turn now. Right, but I can move any turn. So it's my turn now. No, it goes...

turn now right but i can move so it's my turn now no it goes i thought it was you can only move your team or that's what i thought too you can't you can't move one from one team and one from the other team let's clarify here no it says friend or foe but uh hold on let me look it up again i don't think you can move yourself is what i'm saying it's the troll uh yeah you can't i I think that would be saying you just get to go twice. So that shouldn't be... You may cause any two characters, friend or foe, currently in initiative to instantaneously switch places. Yeah, it's canceling out the person who got the crit by that way.

Yeah, it's certainly unclear, but I'm not going to do it. So I'm just going to have the elemental go. I like how we both thought ourselves into like a singularity there. That's why the podcast ended. That's why time travel plots are so hard. Yeah. Try and decide what I want to do here with old Ellie. Mental.

Under my um, Ellie, Ellie, Ellie. Eh, eh, eh, eh, mental. Under my arm, Ellie, Ellie, Ellie. Eh, eh, eh, eh. Eh, eh. I'm considering doing something wild. Wild. So he's going to take a five-foot step, and he's going to attempt an awesome blow combat maneuver to knock

Sir Will flying into the shaft. Oh. Oh, for God's sakes. Would this just... I don't understand. I don't understand. Talk to me. What's going through your head? Nothing. Just go ahead, man. No, what are you... No, it's fine. Just go ahead.

Do your thing. Standard action. The creature may perform an awesome blow combat maneuver. If the maneuver succeeds against a corporeal opponent smaller than itself, is Sir Will smaller than... Oh my god, this is ridiculous. Its opponent takes damage and is knocked flying 10 feet in a direction of the attacking creature's choice and falls prone so i just have to succeed and you go flying i wonder it's like usually with

combat maneuvers if you're going into a dangerous place you get like a a save but i think this is just perfectly lined up in a way that censor will i would argue because baron moved right yes just we're clear the guy with the highest ac i know he could do this to you he could send you any direction he wanted from there you're just teed up right by the edge it wouldn't matter exactly 10 feet away i don't even hear here i didn't even have to move here's what i would argue it says yeah you read 10 feet correct, Sir Will, if this succeeds and you decide to send him to the shaft, I'm only talking about shaft here, is he should have a reflex save to grab the edge.

Yeah, because it would be right over the edge of the pit if he goes down. I think that's fair because this is the end of the character if he fails it. Why not leave the die in Joe's hands? Not much. Sure. Now, I could fail the combat maneuver check, but I can't imagine I would.

Yeah, her whole job. So every square, this is a 15 by 15 hole. Yeah. Are you sure? I think it's just a five foot hole. And everything else is like the border of it. No, I put that token on there.

Well, what was it downstairs, the shaft? Was it a 15-foot by 15-foot elevator? Yeah, the hope is that you guys would all step on it and trigger the trap. Got it. It is going to wind up and try to awesome blow you. God. That sounds a lot better than I thought Yeah

Maybe that's not so bad 46 against your CMD Jesus man The Elder Earth Elemental Steps up to Sir Will And like Barry Bonds In his prime just Boom punches you

And Sir Will just starts flying off of Lexington. Do you have anything you can stay in the saddle? Ride check. Tell me. I don't see any abilities that are like when awesome blown. I don't see any abilities that are like when awesome blown when blown by awesome

you can as an immediate yeah sir will just go right over the open shaft and we'll see you next week come on Jesus Christ. He likes to ruin entire weeks. Not just days.

Weeks. Why ruin a few minutes when you can ruin an entire week? Oh, my God. Sorry, folks. Sorry, folks. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Glass Cannon Network production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015.

Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission.