The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 308 - Face the Rainbow

Episode Date: December 21, 2021

The heroes face off against one of Volstus' most powerful allies. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Being able to see invisible helps you to see not one, but two Gugs hiding behind the wicker baskets. The party engaged a familiar enemy. Metra was the only fail. Oh, no. Do you have anything in your hands?

Uh, my quick and metamagic rod. Not anymore. Drop it. Not panicked. Stunned. Only to be ambushed by a long-awaited foe. Then, the basket that's about 20 feet away from Metra. Oh, god.

The lid pops off. No! Oh, no. And slithering. Oh, I thought of snakes when I saw the basket. Oh, no. Of the basket is a naga. Oh my god! And you're stunned?

Lying in wait. I've been watching you. Yeah. Strong and mighty you are. But now you enter my chamber. And ready to strike.

Long has your journey been to get to this moment, but it ends here, because now you will die. And a flood of prismatic colors come out. No! At all of you. The adventure continues now. I'm out. Buon Natale May all your wishes come true Buon Natale to Italy Means a Merry Christmas To you, Matthew

That's what it means to you and your people Merry Christmas, Troy Merry Christmas, Matthew! Did you grow up your family singing that around the toasted ravioli? No, because we didn't go to Olive Garden. What? That song is as Italian

as the Eiffel Tower. Have you had an Italian Christmas Eve? Have you done the Seven Fishes? No, I would love to. I always was jealous of the Italian kids growing up. I'm like, ah, I'm French-Canadian. I'm nothing. I want to be Italian.

I want to eat spaghetti and have it be like it's part of my heritage, not just because I like spaghetti. I mean, spaghetti isn't originally Italian, so you should have all the spaghetti your little heart desires. I don't even like spaghetti. all the spaghetti your little heart desires. I don't even like spaghetti. I threw up once as a child eating spaghetti, and I didn't eat it for seven years because I was convinced that if I were to put spaghetti in my body,

it would just immediately projectile. That's what happened to me with the eggnog. It's the exact same thing. And I still have, will not drink it. See, I'm back on the spaghetti train. Well, important question. Would you eat other shapes of pasta? Yes, I'm a ziti man.

Love ziti. Oh, ziti's a good pasta, Troy. And that ziti better have lines, let me tell you. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's better with lines. So just to be clear, you thought it was the shape of the flour and water that made you throw up. He was a child. It tastes different.

He was a child. It tastes different. Spaghetti just, it just looks bad. It just looks like a bunch of worms. It's gross. I don't like spaghetti. If my wife makes spaghetti, I throw it against the wall. That's how you tell if it's done.

That's right. That's a self-made program. Help her out in the kitchen. That's all that is. How are you cleaning up? I love it when the spaghetti is twirled just perfectly on the end of a fork, like at a fancy restaurant. I think it can look really pretty. If it end of a fork, like at a fancy restaurant. It can look really pretty.

If it's just a mess, though, I kind of get what you mean. Do you do the left-hand twirl on the spoon? I think I do a right-hand twirl. Right-hand twirl on the spoon. Right-hand twirl on the spoon. You eat off the fork, not off the spoon. Yeah, I guess so. But a lot of people, like Joe, he likes to use the fork with his left hand and then pushes everything else onto the plate onto the fork with his knife.

You know that you do this? Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, I was watching you the other day. When I eat with a knife. Wait, if you're eating like something you have to cut, like a steak, you are supposed to do that. Yeah, I guess. What are you getting on my shit? Because you were like pushing, you were using your knife as a plow to put all of the other food on your fork yeah food

plow yeah how do you get stuff onto your fork that is not like a chunk like rice onto a fork you cut and then you switch back and then you take whatever meat you have and you dunk it around rice i'm talking that was rice i cut each and if there's no edge to the plate would you rather i let gently put my tongue on the side of the plate and then just shovel it into my tongue? It looked weird to me at the time. It looks very old fashioned what you were doing. That's that. Oh, man.

You're right. I'm not up to speed on the new ways of knife and fork eating. That's all I can think. Yeah. New fork tech. That's all I can think. These fucking millennials with their knife and forks and cables. That's not how they do it anymore.

Why can't there be one universal charging plug for forks? I don't understand why they had to change it all. My wife does fork, knife, and she's right-handed, cut, and then switches the fork to the right. Sets down the knife, switches the fork to the right hand, eats the bite, and then switches back again to cut the next one. Yeah. I need to look up what's correct according to the rules of etiquette. Yeah, check out Emily Post.

See what... What does Emily say? What does Emily say on this matter? Pinky out. That's all we know. Though I am still enjoying the image of Sam just in the kitchen, just like, you know,

very peacefully making spaghetti, and you just walking in grabbing it and throwing it against the wall reaching my hand into the boiling pot and then being like it appears to be done uh yeah i do i i i used to work for an italian travel company doing like videos promo videos so did i for one day get out of one day stint with the same travel company and uh i always uh i would do these videos on italian christmas and man does it look fun and i'd love to go uh to italy during the holiday season um even though i

never want to take a plane ride that long again they they know what they're doing out there uh in italy uh by the way you should check out christmas in rome a hallmark movie from a couple years ago starring lacy chabert oh it's lovely big lacy chabert fan i've seen it four or five times i did a i did a movie i did a hallmark movie you did a hallmark did you do the one that i suggested no so i asked troy for his number one suggestion for 2021 he gave it to me me. What was it? It's called An Unexpected Christmas. It might be my favorite this year so far because there's new ones every year. But I thought it was a great introductory Hallmark movie for you.

And it's not available right now. You can only watch it when it airs. And so I needed something that I could stream. So I went and found a list online of the best Hallmark Christmas movies of all time. You should have texted me. Number one is A Royal Christmas. Excellentmas excellent okay so you agree with that uh also not easily available from what i could tell but number three was a royal christmas also stars lacey chabert wow the new stage of her career wait a minute an actor was in two different hallmark christmas movies and the incomparable jane Seymour was in that as well.

Oh, wow. Jane Seymour, solitaire herself. Dr. Quinn? Do you have all the actors ranked in addition to the movies? Do you have, like, a power ranking? In my brain, I do. Okay. And in my heart.

Who, if you were to, like... Wait, are they different? Are the lists different? They sometimes conflict. The heart walks with the heart walks. If you were to have like an ideal christmas movie like who would be your all-star cast for the christmas fantasy draft uh well so bethany joy lenz who was on one tree hill i guess she does a lot of them and she was in the unexpected christmas

the one that uh i recommended to joe uh my favorite women are her and nikki deloach who was like in the mickey mouse club she is just she's just everything about Christmas to me. She's great. Jill Wagner's good as well. And then in terms of the guys, I think his name is Tyler Hines. Yeah, Tyler Hines. He's in that movie and Unexpected Christmas with Bethany Joy Lentz. So that's why I recommend you because it's like my two favorite.

The guy, the girl. Check it out. I love Lacey Chabert ones. Even the girl played Winnie Cooper She's done a couple And I can get into them Even though I did not care For the one years

Oh, Dabo Olivia Dabo? No Danica McKellen? Yes Danica, yeah Oh But if I see something with Bethany Joy Lentz

I stop what I'm doing I drop the baby on the floor And I sit down and watch it Wait, Olivia Dabo played Winnie Cooper, didn't she? No, I don't know who Olivia Dabo is. It was the... She played... Winnie Cooper was played by race car driver, Donica Patrick.

Karen. She played the sister. Oh, okay. All right. So anyway, I got to number... She was Princess Johanna in Conan the Destroyer, though. I got to... Jesus Christ.

Put down, Brad! I got to number three on the list and it was easily available on the Hallmark app. It's a little movie called The Christmas Train. Oh! You mean my favorite one of all time? It was wonderful.

Wasn't it great? Fucking Danny Glover! That's why I watched it, because Danny Glover is... I was like Oh one with real actors Soap opera actors I can't believe this Is happening right now

Dermot Mulroney Yep The girl from Father of the Bride Which I watched a thousand times Kimberly Williams Paisley Brad Paisley's wife Brad Paisley's wife

And Danny Glover And Joan Cusack Yes Absolutely crushing it Was this like The headliner movie of that year?

Dude, here's the thing. It was my gateway into Hallmark Films. I sat down with Sam. I'm like, I'll watch this. Oh, Dermot Mulroney. Danny Glover's in this fucking thing? Now I watch it six times a year. It's the best one.

Why didn't you just say that when I asked you? Because you said what's the best one that came out this year. That's true. You would ask all the time. I have watched other Hallmark movies And I've never been that impressed by them This one totally impressed me Does it take place on a train?

The whole thing is on a train It's like Murder on the Orient Express That's exactly what I was thinking But it's Christmas on a train Spoiler alert They all have Christmas. Anyway, it's great. I highly recommend it. And it was, you could tell that it's actually a Hallmark movie because even

with those actors, because they spent the whole budget on the actors and I guess the writer, cause it's well written. Uh, the sets are horrific and like some of the special effects are so bad, but you don't mind. You're like, it's like watching a play. You're like, I'm watching a play. They like step out of the train at one point and and they're behind a drop of the mountains or something. But besides that, the acting is terrific.

Yeah, it's funny. That one does have noticeably bad special effects for when they go outside in the fake snow. But I'm so glad you watched the Christmas train. What happens on this train that they need special effects? It's like Polar Express Well I don't want to Spoil it for you Matthew No it's

It's seriously like They You know They didn't have the money To shoot in an area With snow or mountains Like with actual snow or mountains It's like in a studio

Where is the train going? Uh The train is going from Washington D.C. To L.A. California yeah Oh that's a long trip And it's visiting

All of the cities of christmas all the ports of call of christmas it's so good derma maroney plays like a former war journalist yeah don't say anything i didn't know anything it's fucking great derma maroney uh also the star of another christmas classic the family stone uh yes how have you not seen the family stone well now i'll put it on my list it's not a hallmark movie troy but i'm not watching it's uh it's just a movie about the actual release movie does the christmas train leave in september to get from dc to la no it only it only takes four days but the funny thing is in the story they're in chicago on day three and in la on day four it's very strange don't worry about that part

don't worry about it it's a christmas miracle it's the magic of christmas caitlin and i re-watched the holiday last year you know the kate winslet cameron diaz black yes they swap they swap houses and i never noticed this before but it seems to be christmas eve for about four days in that movie i was like i'm very confused at the timeline it's the magic of christmas, we're having an awards ceremony at the WGA on Christmas Eve. It seems weird. It seems weird. I can't believe you watched the Christmas train.

If you guys ever want a gateway, just do what Joe did and watch it, and then we'll talk about it. And you'll be like, you know what? I get it. When I got to the app and saw that it was streaming, it has a branding icon on it that says the hallmark hall of fame so i knew this was like getting like a game of the year video game where you see that it's like dark souls the criterion edition of the hallmark i like that they self-appoint the hall of fame hallmark does the nfl self-support the nfl whole thing denny gloria plays a guy named max powers no he doesn't. Don't say any more.

We're going to ruin it. There's something about a train. There's something about a train. If I can stream it, I'll watch it. Can I stream it without? Oh, yeah. Look at this. I can get it on Amazon Prime if I start a seven-day trial of Hallmark movies now.

That is the gift it gives all year long. Yeah. I would cancel this recording for us to just sit around on the couch together get some go out get some hot chocolate oh hot chocolate yes oh god take the protective tarp off the tv fire it up a little christmas train well just deal with the fact that there's no green coloring on the television mix. And it may start a fire. It seems like you're kind of watching The Matrix while you're watching the Christmas

Dream. Or there's no red coloring, rather. That's an important Christmas color. I don't think we should stoop so low. Well, let's see. What's today? Today is the 20th of December. So this is Christmas week.

Yeah. This is it, folks. If you celebrate Christmas, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas week. Christmas Eve, obviously, being the superior day because it's the height of anticipation. And then Christmas being... I'll tell you what, Troy. The Christmas train will also teach you a very valuable lesson about the journey being what's important and not the destination. Some people get it now.

I was like the day before Christmas Eve. That was my favorite day. No school, but you don't have to do any celebration stuff? My kids have school on December 23rd. What? I'm like, come on. That's ridiculous. It is.

That's ridiculous. It's like torture. Yeah, no, I mean, every day before Christmas is better than Christmas. Christmas starts strong, and then it just goes into crippling depression. It's the night. I'm just picturing you with a nog, just crying in a corner, rocking back and forth. They should have NFL. Oh, they do the NBA games.

That's kind of cool. That's why you should become British, so you have Boxing Day to look forward to on Christmas. I still celebrate it, but it's not the same. And I'll listen to the Hallmark movies. There's nothing sadder i think i said did i say this on air there's nothing sadder than the day that i'm watching a hallmark because i'll still watch them after christmas trying to rekindle the feeling oh that's and all of a sudden at 10 p.m it switches to golden girls instead of 24 hours of christmas and i want to slit my wrists oh no that's enough very sad golden girls is a great show

fuck golden girls no you bite your tongue there's nothing sadder josh whedon's dad wrote on that show did he papa whedon yeah yeah mitch hurwitz did too yeah papa whedon goes down the Unitarian Church's family list for Christmas. Do you think Troy is more of a Sophia or Dorothy? I think he's a nice mix, actually, probably. Not a nice mix, but a mix. He's a mean mix. That's more Dorothy. God, that's a tough one.

Because he's not a Blanche. No, no, no, no, no, no. Joe's a tough one because i don't he's not a blanche no no no no no joe's a blanche yep you mean the sexy one sex starved mania why does she get in trouble for continuing to have a very active sex life well into her old age yeah yeah um it's late 80s you didn't talk about that and mixed company I remember my neighbors Said that

They were like Came over They just They just make jokes about sex Because they can't think of anything funny It's like What the fuck is wrong with you? No sex is never funny

Right Never Yeah nothing funny about sex It's always clean and easy Well this is Christmas week and we're actually going to take next week off. I know we've taken more days off this year than we've ever taken. Three.

But we are going to take next week off to enjoy the holiday season and by that time Matthew will be a father. From your lips. That's pretty exciting. Good chance. Matty will be a dad and the rest of us will be still opening our presents and then boxing them up and i of course will be dead

but uh we're going to take next week off and then we'll be back uh beginning of the year with the new app so today has to really land oh no and it's And it's gonna. It's gonna land in ways that no one here is going to enjoy. Oh. Oh. So by land, you mean damaged friendships? Possibly. Possibly. But here's the thing.

This is the end of the story. This is the, we are, we are climbing towards a climax. And we have been. You can feel it in the air. We've been climbing towards this epic battle, epic encounter, whatever it's going to be. Obviously, there's a lot of different storylines still up in the air. We are climbing there, and this is it. This is the Nagas.

So it's like a plane landing on a mountainside in a foggy night. Exactly. Exactly. And we all know how that tends to turn out. Oh, man. By the way, I just want you all to know that it is the cutting with the knife and then putting the knife down and switching hands with the fork. That is the American style of etiquette. The European style is to put the tines of the fork facing down, leave the fork in your hand cut with the knife and then eat with that eat with the off hand yes at a minus two yes

must you have two utensil heating feet yes you can take a feet but uh i think you need to be fifth level at least for that okay you have to have to have a BAB of six. Fee tax is too high. Last week, you came up here. You fought a couple Gugs. A couple GL numbs. Toss back a couple GL numbs. And then I kept you in initiative order. Because while you were fighting those decoy gugs things were happening one of which

was the uh appearance of a vrock a demon vulture person a demon of the ancient world who let out a horrifying screech that stunned metra metra is stunned for only one round but man in high level play that's that's enough to say bye, Metra. Drops everything she's holding, which was? The Quicken Madman's rod. That doesn't usually come in handy, does it? It's to the ground. And oddly enough, there was a crack right in the floor there where you

dropped it, and because of its cylindrical shape, it rolled into that crack and fell somewhere on Galarian. Perhaps it will land on a child's head on Christmas morning and now they will have that rod. So you can go to your death knowing that you gave something

to a little child who maybe wouldn't have got anything otherwise. Metric claws. I'd like to invoke the metric laws. And then the Naga comes out. The Naga says that she has been watching you ever since you entered the keep that her eyes have followed you throughout the castle. She's impressed that you've made it this far,

but she is prepared and she has prepared Volstice. And now you have entered her chamber. And you're going to die. And then she leans back and just like, and seven colors come flying out of her mouth. I forgot about the prismatic death. Here's what's going to happen with this there are seven rays that come out all of you including Lexington will be hit by one

the other two rays will hit others of you randomly oh and each ray is random man if I ever wanted to fudge a die now is the time but no no no we are doing this by the book as to what color hits each of you. Will you be rolling the corresponding color die to the spray?

Oh, that's a good idea. I would if I had more time. I'd also like to, in full disclosure, say, after last recording, you said, whatever you do, don't look this up. I'd never do. But I just want to be clear. I have no idea what the hell is going to happen with this prismatic thing. I don't know if other people at this table understand this spell just by name. We definitely believe you.

Do you know what it is, Joe? No. But I know. I know prismatic spray. Matthew, you know. And I don't know what the effects are. But I know that it. Do you know what it is, Joe? No, but I know. I know Prismatic Spray. Matthew, you know. And I don't know what the effects are, but I know that it's horrible. And I think it's a level eight. I don't want to know what it does, but...

I almost took it. I can't remember if it's from another character. It's a... I mean, it's really random. It can be really devastating or totally bizarre. It's the Wand of Wonders of spells. Yeah. But it's like...

But everything... Everything is bad. Oh, my God. And it's like, but everything, everything is bad. Oh my God. And it's, again, another spell that goes all the way back to original Dungeons and Dragons. And yes, it's bad. So I'm going to just walk through the line of each of you in your current initiative order to hit you with one of the rays. The rays will be random. How many rays are there?

Seven. So you got to remove them. How many random rays are there? They're be random. How many rays are there? Seven. So you've got to remove them. How many random rays are there? They're all random. But I'm saying one heats each of you, and then there'll be two extras. I know, but how many random options are there? Eight. Eight.

So are you saying there are eight different color rays? Or are you just going to say... And there are seven separate rays. Some of them could be two blues. That's what I'm going to figure out. Is it red or green? Oh, so you're going to be like, Baron, you're hit by a boom. I like that.

Or you're hit by a bam. You're rolling on the full table for each race. So there might be seven Blu-rays. Yes, which would be very, very bad. For example, I don't even own seven Blu-rays anymore. And the text of the spell allows you to hit different characters more than once. I'm just asking because this is high stakes, Troy. Every creature in the area is randomly struck by one or more beings.

Got it. Got it. And in fact, should I roll an eight? Oh, no. Quick question. Oh, good Lord. Did you read the last line of the spell? Which have additional effects. That read the last line of the spell? Which have additional effects.

That's the last line. Okay. Oh, that was just a general question. Yeah. They always read until the very last line. You've got the old last line blind spot. We sure do. So the bird demon is subject to the rays as well?

No. You said creatures in the area are randomly hit. That is fair. And correct. It doesn't say every enemy. It does say every creature in the area. What does it say under target? Does it say all enemies in a John radius?

Yeah, it's cone-shaped John. Oh, it's a cone. Oh, it's a cone. So you can't get all of us. No, I can't. It's a 60-foot cone. I wish I had the artwork for the actual 60-foot cone. You got to hit that bird, man.

Yeah, I think you are right, which is absurd because it's her ally. But it's like a fireball. That's why you don't get to use it. It's such a devastating thing. All right, well, I will then roll against the bird first just to warm it up. Warm it up and let you know what you're dealing with all right so we'll see what let's get a little tester of what we're looking at here through the rock yeah now i regret choosing the rock first but uh because you're gonna know what

you're dealing with but uh that's okay uh let's do that uh we can i just measured it again with the uh actual uh-foot cone options, and I do get all of you in there. So, fuck, I didn't even realize. I've been prepping all day. I never even read the thing, or I didn't let it sink in on purpose. Every creature. Because I was like, why would she want to attack a beautiful Vrak?

Here we go. Against the Vrak. Naga and Vrak, the best of friends. I'm going to die. Okay. It's 8 going to die. Okay. It's 8.45 a.m. You're listening to Naga and the Vrak. All right, so a violet ray flies and hits the Vrak. All right, let me look up violet.

No, please don't. But the Vrak does get a will save. Oh, does the save change based on the color of the charm? Amazing. And I rolled a natural one. Oh, yeah! What does that mean? What does that mean?

What does it do? Well, here's what happens. The Vrock disappears. What? What? The Vrock just... Swoom! Winks out of existence.

Oh, my god. That's kind of the perfect terrifying opening. Yeah, they're working together. She's made him invisible. For all that Sir Will knows of this kind of advanced magic. Yeah. I mean, holy shit. Or that Joe knows, as it turns out.

I have no idea what happened. Okay. Oh my goodness. Okay. Oh, my goodness. Okay. I'm just going to take it down the line here. Baron, you are first on my initiative tracker. You get hit by a red red. No, that doesn't sound good.

Fire. Give me a reflex save. Okay. Oh, baby. He's going to make it by a mile and a half. Reflex save sounds positive 32 You take 10 points of fire damage Okay oh my god

Not bad at all Next up is Metra who is stunned I don't know if that affects your saves I have all saves My god this is This is insanity. Arguably the worst one.

You get hit by two rays. When you roll an eight, you get hit by two rays. So I get the random ray. Wait, wait, wait. So it's one of those, one of the two seven. It's not like it got doubled up on one.

Oh, that's interesting. Yeah, I think that's probably correct. I don't even know where we left off. We actually just stopped the recording to dig into this, and it took about 35 minutes. Because, you know, it's a relic. It's an old spell, right? Yeah.

This goes way back. It goes all the way back to the original version of Dungeons dragons and i think as advanced as new additions have come out they've tried to shy away from spells like this i think because it's it's very very dangerous and so the ruling that we've kind of settled on here um is that everyone gets hit by a ray end of story but there won't be that that errant ray that just hits somebody else. Because I was going to say, well, all right, there's five of you in the room,

six plus Liggeton, and then there's that seventh ray that's going to hit somebody. Instead of doing that, we're just going to, everyone gets hit by a ray, and you could get hit by two. Because where I'm randomly determining people,

if I got down to the end, all right, Nestor, oh, Nestor, you got an eight as well. I guess you don't get hit by anything, Sir Will, because that's already been 7 rays. It wouldn't make sense, do you know what I mean? Because everyone should get hit. And I certainly wouldn't have gone after the Varrock first. I'd be like, well, let's see if there's any rays

left before I go after my Varrock. However, it looks in digging in that where you get hit by an 8, I roll a D8 twice. I ignore an eight, but I keep rolling until something comes. Because you're not going to be with four rays. Right.

It's just two rays. Right. But I thought eight meant like, oh, you lucked out. You only get hit by one. No, it looks like ignore is like just roll until you die. It's just bad news bears for me all over. It really is. It really is.

And, of course, Baron got the easiest ray of the bunch. I could get that red ray. And Metro's going to get annihilated. Yeah. Here we go. Bad news bears. Okay. You did get one red ray.

All right. All right. We'll start with the good news. Give me a reflex save. Okay. 24. 24. 24? You take 10 points of fire damage.

All right. Not too bad, right? Not too bad. You really built this up like it was going to be a bad thing. This is fine. Now give me a will save as an indigo ray hits you. Oh, no. Roy G. Biv.

Roy G. Biv. Ooh. 18. Oh, no. Oh, no. Roy G. Biv. Roy G. Biv. Uh, ooh. 18. Oh, no. Oh, no. Wait, wait, wait. Don't read the effects. Uh, I don't know if I should take it. We should take Sir Will out of the combat, right? Not Metro.

Well, the other thing that I could give you in this moment, if this is really bad, bottle cap. I got a bottle cap. All of you have one bottle Bottlecap. I got a bottlecap. All of you have one bottlecap. Oh, I have a bottlecap. Yes, you have to use that to get your bonus before you roll the dice.

All of you have one bottlecap, which gives you a plus eight at this point to a roll. Do you want to eat that, Sir Will, or do you want to give it to her? I think I should eat it. I'm going to eat it. So Sir Will is going to cast Paladin Sacrifice. And this is an immediate effect

after the roll of a die? After an ally fails a saving throw, and I check the range, and she's within the range. Okay, so you just take it, or you roll for it? No, I just take it. Wow. You are permanently insane. As via the insanity spell,

you have continuous confusion. Oh my God. So talk to me about the, like, how does this work, do you think? She gets hit by this, two rays, and then you just, you call to your God to have it inflect into you?

Yeah, basically. So yeah, I imagine this swirling prism of rays is kind of going everywhere. It's very confusing in a moment. And I think he just targets Metra in his mind, knowing that he can help. He wants to help the sheriff, right, always. And the sheriff is right next to him, but it happens so fast. But his attention is drawn to Metra because of her stunned state. He just sees her as being incredibly vulnerable.

And also the key individual to either defeat Volstis or get us out of a bad situation if it comes to that. To regroup our forces. She was already stunned. He also is extremely confident in his deity's ability to protect him from such evil. And I'm not just talking about damage. I'm talking about things like, you know, so if this ray was like, you are panicked, for example, or something like that, like, I'm pretty sure, like, it would not affect him. So, like, you can apply your immunities to it and stuff like that, but you can't apply

your bonuses to the saving throw against it. You just take the effects. So I think, yeah, he was just like, if something is to happen to her, I am a day. Let it be done unto me! And he takes it in, but then all of a sudden, loses his connection with Ioma Day. Does he get a wolf?

For a second. No, I do not. It's per the wording of his spell. You just take the effects of it. I take the effects of the failure. Take the effects of the failure. So we've had someone disappear, damage, and then someone go permanently insane by the wording of the spell. Permanently insane.

Permanently insane. It's just like, did it work? Don't look it up. What happened? It's like being affected by a seventh level insanity spell. Wow. So I don't know what that means. You do it on the confusion table every time, right?

No, yeah, you're just under the confusion spell. It's more about how to remove it that's complicated. Okay. Wow. Especially while you're probably the one that's in the best position to actually remove it, and you're insane. But I could act normally. Yeah, if you get to the end.

Long enough to figure it out, maybe. I'm going to recommend psychotherapy, and you're insane. But I could act normally. Yeah, if you get to the end. Long enough to figure it out, maybe. I'm going to recommend psychotherapy, and let's start with lithium, and then move on to something else. I am going to roll Nestor's prismatic spray, which will determine whether or not Skip will be joining us for the episode. Oh, no.

Here it is. Here it is. Okay. Let me get Here it is. Okay. Let me get the table up. Okay, not bad. A yellow ray hits you. Boom. Give me a reflex there.

Oh, it's electricity, I think. Oh, come on, Neystar. Come on, buddy. That is a 29. 29. You take 40 points of electricity damage. Whoa! That yellow ray hits you And now Sir Will and Lexington

No Wait did he pass the save? No Nester? Yeah Yeah So that was reflex for half? It was reflex half so with evasion I guess you wouldn't take any right?

Evasion is typically AOE, non-targeted. I don't know. What I'm reacting to is 80 points of damage? Yeah. It was 80, yeah. Just a flat 80. Does evasion say any time you would take damage? No, if exposed to any effect that normally allows you to attempt a reflex saving throw for half damage,

you take no damage. Oh, my God. Faster than lightning. Faster than lightning. Faster than lightning. Shoot a matrix. Like, whoa. And I'm seeing it with all the, like, rainbows. Like, just prismatic crystalline explosions around him.

Bends down. Avoids the jaw. And you're wearing light armor? I am. Yeah. I've never noticed this. Evasion can be used as a roguegues wearing light or no armor. Wow.

They even say a helpless rogue does not gain the benefits of evasion. That's one of the greats. You get that at second level, and it just... It's one of the best damn abilities. Some people do a rogue dip of two levels. Not just to get evasion, but they do the extra level just to get evasion. Sneak attack plus evasion. Just a little extra.

A couple extra dice and uh yeah and certain like proficiencies or whatever oh you know what it is it's you do a dip in rogue to get uh class skills for almost every skill yeah you get like that's all yeah you get all the class skills if you get two levels you get evasion you get the sneak attack

forever it's a really it's a really great uh sensible way to do a split class you start as like a street urchin who has to like feed and steal for his family in order to feed himself and then finds another career after he gets a little adventuring under his belt cleric do you want me to hit uh you or lexington first uh let's do me first man if lexington goes down i'm going to be very confused, in addition to being confused. Okay.

I mean, all these roles have been pretty softball, except for the Varrock. Anybody have any doubts about what's going to happen here? I have none. Here's the ray against Sir Will. I think Sir Will and the Varrock are going to meet up wherever the Varrock went. Reflex save. Oh, sweet! We've done it.

By the grace of Iomedae! Uh, 29. 29. You take 40 points of electricity damage. All right! Now there you go. All-tike-it. You're so excited for that 40 points.

Yes! So damage you can always get taken care of. You can get back. Yeah, it's not like insanity. Uh, here we go. Then, now... Lexington. No!

If he disappears. It's like plop to the ground. Give me a fortitude save for Lexington. Oh, I don't know the sound of that, do I? It's better than a will save. It is better than a will save. Okay, Lexi Magoo. Here we go.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, okay. 22, no. Oh, well, 22. Fail. No! A blue ray hits Lexington, and all of a sudden, you feel something different beneath you.

Lexington feels no longer soft. He starts to feel like you're sitting on a statue. Oh, no! Oh, petrified! Flesh to stone. No! Is he made of flesh? Well, yeah, I don't know.

He's celestial now, right? Yeah, but I think he's made of flesh. Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, was celestial, and he was made out of flesh. I don't know if you know what's near Italian Christmas. It's called the Vatican, Matthew! Listen, I don't know i don't know if you know what's near italian christmas it's called the listen i don't want to get political spell resistance he has spell resistance yes okay is it subject to spell resistance yes okay so i'll need a spell resistance roll well

well i will give you this i'm sure he has no bonus you will give me this yeah i'll give you this automatic roll oh uh what do i have to beat here i'm just looking it's just my level right yeah okay unless it has some special ability like spell penetration uh 24 fail oh 24 spell resistance double check if you have spell pen. I don't have spell penetration. That's a 10! Wow. He has spell resistance 27. Holy shit.

I thought he'd be like 20. Dude, he is the mount of a 16th level paladin. He's a magical wolf. He literally is. He literally is a magical wolf. Joe, that's incredible, dude. Shrugs it off. Shrugs it off.

Unbelievable. Wow. Things are still pretty bad. Things are still quite bad. Okay, that is all the raising. It actually worked out that it was just seven. Here's what happens. The Naga then ducks her head down and dematerializes.

Fuck. Oh, no. This creature would be very difficult to handle. Is she invisible? You do not see her. So she's not invisible, nor is she on the ethereal plane. Correct. Okay.

It is. Metra's turn.. Correct. Okay. It is. Metra's turn. Metra is stunned. Stunned? Stunned. It is now. You stunned her just as she was waking up. Now, Nestor's turn.

Nestor. Can I do a perception check and still delay? Yeah, sure. I'll do a perception check and still delay? Yeah, sure. I'll do a perception check. Oh, natural 20. So that's quite high. That's a 39. Are you looking for anything specific?

You're looking for her? You're looking for... Yeah, any sign of the two people that we can't immediately see right now. No, the vrock just dematerialized. Just like, it looked similar to what Metra does when she moves through planes, just teleports. It had that kind of

feel to it. And then the Naga is nowhere to be seen. I wonder if the Vrak got imprisoned, maybe. Or something like that. Kind of like the maze you were in? Yeah, I'm trying to think if it's coming back. Yeah, I'm like kind of like the maze you were in yeah i'm trying to think if it's coming back yeah i'm trying to remember like the effects of i think that's one of them i think yeah maze or one of those things is like one of the i actually know his answer so i'm not

going to comment but okay uh all right i'm just going to delay until i know where anyone is. Okay. Nestor will delay. It now goes to Sir Will and his non-stoned wolf. Yeah, he felt something rather strange, but now he's confused. He's confused. Okay. He will attack the nearest creature. It's Lexington. Oh, come on. It's Lexington.

Oh, come on. It is Lexington, technically. No, come on. If the rock was subject to rays, I think Lexington is subject to you hacking at his neck. It's not really. He's got a lance in his hand. The mount is.

Nothing about confusion suggests you have to attack well. Give me a D100. 50 or lower, you attack Lexington. For this purpose, a familiar counts as part of the subject's self. Oh, okay. So, like, maybe we consider an animal companion a familiar? I mean, it's not technically, but... Do the roll. The roll's fine.

Oh, roll for it? Yeah, roll for it. 50 or lower, you attack Lexington. 51 or higher, you charge at Baron. 57. Charge! So he charges at Baron. He just turns, this wild fire in his eyes,

possessed by this Naga's residual insanity. That's fine. I forgot you were insane. Yeah, that's okay. He looks at Baron, and he sees within him the weakness that allowed Highbury to fall. And he says, For Highbury!

Out of nowhere! And Rideby attacks you. He'll never hit you in a million years. Okay. Because of your AC. And I'm not evil, which is a big thing. You are. Six points.

That's your steer clear of the world. Damn! Seriously, don't smite me, bro. Jesus Christ. 42. That's a hit. It is the single best D20 I've rolled in six weeks of this podcast. For God's sake.

So you tilt by Baron. I tilt by Baron. Don't, don't, don't. People aren't supposed to know that I'm the big bad evil guy yet. Okay, you're blowing the cover here. 24 points of piercing damage. Damn it. And he like steps out of it for a second

and he's, what have I done? Shut him up, sorry! Starts to lose it again. What's happening? Alright, so you are still confused. Top of the next round. Round four, I believe, and it's Baron's turn. Would the bird creature have gone somewhere in there? No, the bird went before the Naga.

So it hasn't been one round. Yeah. Huh. Why do you ask? Oh, because of the sun. Yeah, it's done, too. God. It's like I don't want to get into the delay game with this Naga and, like, have it show up and then I'm screwed either way.

Like, I kind of want to take action this round. So I'm going to... I can take a move action, a five-foot step, and a standard action, correct? I'm just making sure in this crucial battle. You can't move and five-foot step. Oh a move action, a five foot step, and a standard action, correct? I'm just making sure in this crucial battle. You can't move and five foot step. Oh, move action. Move equivalent action. Yeah, Joe, you said this during the last live show that you can do that.

You can do that? Yep. Okay. Okay, so I'm going to five foot step, move action, pull out a scroll of cure serious wounds, and heal myself. Thereby keeping my spell selection available to me later on um it's a good time to use a scroll my opinion okay great time to use a scroll of cure serious so that way i'm doing something do you know what i mean i'm not delaying i'm not letting and i'm healing up some damage i took from that brutal attack and the um uh the the ray i took earlier. So here we go.

Is it 17 on the base plus... What is the caster level of a Cure Sirius? I always forget on a scroll. Is it plus 5 or plus... It's 5. Okay, so 22 healing. Great. All right, so you made back almost all that damage Sir Will did to you. Steal yourselves from Sir Will in particular.

The most damage he's probably ever done to a non-evil creature in one shot i was incredible i was impressed i'm not even mad i didn't know you could speak spanish and your turn yep at that moment right next to sir will and baron the naga pops out of that basket. Oh, dear. And unleashes another prismatic spray. Oh, no. Okay. All right. Here we go. Instead of going by the initiative track,

I'm going to go in order of who's closest to it, just to mix it up for fun. For funsies. So, first ray is coming at Sir Willamette Keswick. If he gets hit by the insanity ray again, does he become, is he cured? He's almost insane. Like, he's slow. He's being hit by a second coconut.

Is that? This is bad. Uh, you know, I, this is, this is how it's supposed to go. This is how it's supposed to go? It literally says you just keep casting prismatic spray until it ruins the game for every turn. That's a terrible written encounter. I have so much to tell you after this encounter is over.

If it was the way it was supposed to go, the bird would still be here. That's true. Give me a reflex save. An orange ray hits you. So what if it kills Rick? 28 this time. You take 20 points of acid damage. Oh, man.

Ouch. And now, uh, this is against Lexington. Uh, give me uh, well, I'll roll the spell resistance first. Uh, 29. That made it. Okay. Bastard. So now give me a reflex save.

This is the yellow ray. This is the yellow ray. Oh, the yellow ray. So I'm shocked I failed the first one, but I actually do have to roll pretty high to beat your spell resistance. Natural one. Lexington takes 80 points of electricity damage. Okay.

He does have energy resistance electricity. Wow. So I'll take five off. Knock that down to 65. Wow, DR15 is pretty good. Resist to energy 15. I have resist energy. It's not that good. Okay.

How's Lexi's Midnight Runners feeling? It's halfway down. Halfway down. Okay. Let's looki's Midnight Runners feeling? It's halfway down. Halfway down. Okay. Let's look at the map here. Baron's up next, followed by Medra, then Nestor. Baron.

D8. I've switched colors here. Here we go. The same ray that hit the rock hits you. Oh shit. Give me a will save. And I can't sacrifice anymore. At least in this state.

31. You're all right. Yes! I do not materialize at a Waffle House on the side. Next one comes at Metro. No longer stunned.

I'm no longer stunned. Yep. Okay. Oh, God, this is so bad. Give me a will save. What color is it? The same color. Oh, no. Barren. No, no, no, no, no. Will save is my will save. What color is it? The same color. Oh, no!

Barren. No, no, no, no, no. Will save is my best save. 34. You're all right. Okay, all right, team. Come on, squad. You guys know you left all the bad juju for poor Nestor.

Here we go. What? They got hit by the worst rays. That is not how anything works. There is one ray that I have not rolled yet, got hit by the worst rays. That is not how anything works. There is one ray that I have not rolled yet, and it is the worst one. Wait, flesh to stone wasn't the worst one? No, no. I know one of them is disintegrated.

I'm green. The green ray is the worst. It's disintegrated. In what world are we rolling the die, Troy? You're the one who is choosing what die comes out. I'm just saying Nestor's blood is on your hands, Grant. You personally. Here we go.

Give me a reflex save. Okay. You're all right. Hopefully. Come on. His reflex is going to be redonkadon. Oh. Ooh.

Ugh. This is good. 39. That's a classic trailer valley oh no only 39 it was a red ray so you take

nothing then the naga ducks her head under and disappears again oh my god it's so annoying we just need a

ready to action shocking that you guys are still up is this what people who skydive feel like is this why they keep on going up because that every time you appear it feels like i'm on the verge of death and then you disappear again and it's thrilling but terrifying it is metro's turn you're definitely doing this right okay doing what right

teleporting around and disappearing and reappearing in metro will pick up the quick and meta magic rod okay she will then cast disintegrate on the basket to the west the basket to the way she will disintegrate the basket the basket okay it is technically i think a 10 by 10 by 10 cube against an object. Okay. It is a 10 foot wide, 10 foot long basket. A 10 foot cube of living matter. Now, if it is a magical basket, it gets four tootsie. All right. I'll roll a four tootsie.

16. Fail. Okay. It takes 32d6 points of damage. Oh, my God. Please roll that damage. Oh, gosh. You have the HP for the wicker basket?

I actually do. Roll 32d6. Of course you do. You had it saving throw bonus, so I guess you have HP. What'd you say? No, I was typing. I had to roll 32d6. If everyone doesn't mind, I used Google for that.

Cheater! That is 103 points of damage. Okay okay i was already drawing an x to put over the bottom so i knew you were going to annihilate it r.i.p um okay and then uh quick amount of magic rod i will cast you don't have it i just picked it up as my move action you win this round i didn't hear you pick it up as my move action. You win this round. I didn't hear you pick it up. I thought you were going to have to take a move action to pick it up. Oh, and it's a swift action.

And then I will cast mirror image on myself. Boom. Okay, mirror image. Baron sees this and says, You have any of those fireballs left, Metra? Fearfully in his mind as he's not able to attack this naga as it pops up of course but we don't know what plane it's on oh can i roll some knowledge wait why are you not able to attack it because it is it seems like to me this feels like a boss battle where this thing will just pop up in any of these baskets and i thought matthew was systematically

like right right but why can't you attack it because it appeared i can ready an action but i can only get one attack off yeah but i mean it's better than nothing sure and that's what i'll do but if we can eventually i don't know i just thought you were saying it was like it's not impossible or something but it's not right it's no it's just a matter of like i have no idea how many hit points it has it might have a ton it might have unlimited of this spell and we might all be gone if we don't. Yeah. Limited opportunities. I would like to roll knowledge checks on the Naga on prismatic spray. So I can,

I can know we can know more about it. You're not metagaming. Uh, you can roll a, uh, knowledge. Uh, what's aberration?

Uh, dungeoneering. Is it? I always think that. And then I, all of a sudden it's Arcana. Um, I'll look that up, but then it's, it's Arcana. I'll look that up.

But then it's Spellcraft for Prismatic Spray. Dungeoneering is Aberrations. I cannot roll that, so I'll roll the Arcana for the Prismatic Spray. Hold on. No, Spellcraft. Spellcraft. Spell. Sorry. Okay, 25 on the Spellcraft.

25. Okay. What do you want to know? What the spellcrafts. 25. Okay. What do you want to know? What the spell does. I think the most important thing at this point would be to know where the bird is. Where the bird is. It was sent to another plane. Any mechanic for it coming back?

If it can travel through planes easily. All right, then let's roll. What now? And the bird would be? So if Baron had failed, he would have All right, then let's roll. What now? And the bird would be? So if Baron had failed, he would have just been sent to a random plane. That'd be now it's planes. And then what happens?

Do you roll on a table for planes? Like, it could be like the negative energy plane. It's not in the spell, but I've done some research. There are plane tables. I just was like, I'll never come up. I'll look it up when it happens.

So what can we roll for the bird? The bird... It's an outsider. It should be planes, right? I'm no longer concerned about the bird, then. Yeah, planes. Well, it's an outsider that I possibly could travel through planes. Right.

It got here. It got here, didn't it? I couldn't read my roll, and I didn't want to fudge it, so I'm going to re-roll. Okay. Yeah, I didn't get it. 11. What'd you get? 11. You don't know? Yeah, I don't read my roll, and I didn't want to fudge it, so I'm going to re-roll. Okay. Yeah, I didn't get it. 11. What'd you get? 11.

You don't know. Yeah, I don't know. But your instincts make you feel like it is not the last you've seen of the Vroka. Oh. And what do we know about the Naga? I can't roll. I don't have engineering. Oh, it's engineering.

Okay. All right, that's my turn. That is your turn Nestor coin Nestor, so yeah, I am This does suck because Losing a full round of attacks And many shots sucks, but I'm gonna Have to ready an action if I see

This thing pop up again I'm gonna shoot at it with One of my plus three flaming arrows Well that or Based on what Metrora's doing, I mean, could you try peppering the wicker basket until it's destroyed with

arrows? I guess? I don't know. It's weird. That feels like attacking a skeleton with a non-bludgeoning item, you know, just how arrows work. I know. It's a big wicker, but it is flaming wicker. They're flaming, and it would have hardness and and stuff i think the best bet is to get uh hopefully to get a crit on this naga as it shows up yeah yeah also with all these abilities it's possible the naga doesn't

have stupid hit points like a giant you know what i mean um yeah it's just maybe it's just hard to hit but doesn't have as many hit points as possible. There's also, I'm trying to remember, there's some counter to prismatic spray, I think. There's some weird counter, but I can't remember what it is. I might be making it up. Does such a thing exist with my knowledge check on that spell spray? On prismatic spray? Nothing came up? Maybe closing your eyes?

Yeah? No. There's some like... Hit your body. I may be remembering this completely wrong, but I think there's some way hit your body i may be remembering this completely wrong but i think there's like some like spell that doesn't seem on the face but to have anything to do with prismatic spray but it's some kind of counter to it huh but the problem is your brain has collected so much dnd no it's like you could be crossing systems no no totally yeah or spells Totally, yeah. Or spells. All right, that was Metra's turn.

Nestor, you're going to ready a fire shot when the knock appears. Or the frock. Or the frock, okay. When an enemy appears. Yeah. Okay. Sir Will, give me a roll on that confusion, too. I'll give you a roll if you shut your mouth.

I'm to self, I bet. Oh, yeah. Well, with his strength modifier and this weird thing. I'll roll next turn. Sir Will looks across at Baron, resets himself again. Oh, no. Looks down the edge of his lance and looks at you, dude. And is just like, hell.

Baron's scared. And you is just like, I'll blow that. Baron's scared. And you're just like, what? Baron's terrified at first, but then he pulls out a red blanket and goes, Toro, Toro! Lexington is just like jumping up and down. And Sir Will's just going, Now here's the thing. Yeah, Will, Lexington's not insane.

Yeah. Yeah, Will... Lexington's not insane. Yeah. So, I mean, is there a chance that he would be like, stop, don't attack your friend? Well, we still have established the 50% chance. Well, I was going to play that. Like, on another attack to Baron,

I was going to try to play, like, the resistance of Lexington, and maybe he just attacks Lexington. It depends on what the roll is, you know, for the random person he hits. Give me the 50% roll. Do you stab down at Lexington, or do on what the roll is, you know, for the random person he hits. Give me the 50% roll. Do you stab down at Lexington or do you go after Baron? No, no, no.

That's what I babble incoherently. Oh, you babble incoherently. Oh, okay. Yeah. I thought you were, we all thought you were going to attack. No, I was acting insane, yeah. This is going to suck so bad because out of combat. It's a really good battle. Every six seconds you're rolling or doing some random...

You just die. It really is, if you've ever been... I have to put him out of his misery. Early sedatum. Okay, that is Sir Will's turn. Top of round five. It is Baron's turn. Baron is going to ready an action,

and that action is to attack with Deadeye, if necessary, to... If this Naga can pop up anywhere, like, outside of his first range increment, he still wants to be able to hit against touch. Okay, and Deadeye is something you could do... Yeah, it's just a standard attack. It's part of your standard, doesn't... Yeah, it's just a standard attack. It's part of your standard.

Yeah, it's not a full attack, no. I can apply it to multiple shots. Okay. Just the Naga or any enemy? Any enemy. Any enemy I see, I will use Deadeye if it is outside of my first range increment. I'm just committing the grit if I need to use it now instead of saying, oh, look, that thing's further away. Right.

Well, this should be interesting. The same basket where the Naga appeared before, it appears again. Nestor, you will have the first chance to attack it. However, as you're looking at it, you realize there's something quite charming about it. Give me a will save. Oh, no.

Don't fascinate me, you dumb snake. Uh, oh, that's a 20. That's a fail. Oh, shit. Nestor Coyne has been charmed by the Naga. Dude, if I could have acted normally, I would have helped. Naga has been charmed by the Naga as if by charm person. Which means that it could have Nestor do whatever it wants with an opposed charisma check.

Oh, boy. Oh, God. And that roll's going to be so high. It is now Naga and Nestor versus the rest of you. And we'll see you next year. Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!

God! Attack Nestor! I couldn't help if I could just act normally! I was wondering how 2021 was going to be worse than 2020, and you figured a way out, Troy. You did it. And 2022, even worse. We did it. We did it. And 2022?

Even worse. Just said it wasn't possible. We did it. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Glass Cannon Network production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of paizo incorporated giant slayer is copyright 2015 giant slayer and the pathfinder adventure path are trademarks of paizo all pathfinder images are property of paizo and are used with permission