The Glass Cannon Podcast - Time For Chaos S2 | E12 – The Prodigal Son

Episode Date: June 24, 2025

Content Warning. Please note that this episode contains depictions of violence that some people may find disturbing. A savage battle leaves the investigators reeling and Eloise's victims clinging to life. Watch the video here: ⁠https://youtu.be/TokQhPom_I4 For a limited time, use code "TFC" to save 15% on Cthulhu products at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠chaosium.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Access exclusive podcasts, ad-free episodes, and livestreams with a 30-day free trial with code "GCN30" at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠jointhenaish.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Join Troy Lavallee, Joe O'Brien, Skid Maher, Matthew Capodicasa, Sydney Amanuel, and Kate Stamas as they tour the country. Get your tickets today at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://hubs.li/Q03cn8wr0⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://hubs.li/Q03cmY380⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Watch new episodes when they premiere every Friday at 8PM ET on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/theglasscannon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, starting July 11th. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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CANON, C-A-N-N-O-N when you check out to save 20% on your first order. Nothing is as it seems in liminal London. Hidden amongst everyday people are werewolves. You'll be the werewolf then? Yeah, um and Megs. Wizards. Montgomery Archibald Barker at your bloody service. And those cursed by the fae monarchs of the city. Deccan Buchanan, PI.

He has quite a large pair of antlers growing out of his forehead. Join the unlikely misfits of liminal London as they work to take down the powers that claim to rule the city. I think the Queen doesn't like you very much. With incredible guest players like Johnny Chiodini. Say there's Sludge? Yeah, Sludge, yeah, I'm the Sludge Boy. I fucking love Sludge Boy.

Again, I'm not that Sludge Boy. Grant Howitt. Isaac Newton did the study in fucking Ping putt and who did he? Who's Isaac? Oh my god. And Sharmony Bundell. There's a magic community! There is!

Yay, I'm in a magic community! Go to realmspod.com or search realms of peril and glory wherever you listen to podcasts to find this mysteriously magical actual play series. Music playing Good evening, everybody. It's Friday night and it's time for chaos. We were we were setting up here and I was doing a million other things as always and I'm not like listening to the pleasantries of conversation, but I did choke on popcorn while I'm trying to talk. We'll see you next week. Oh God, shades of season one.

Good, good. Anyways, I did pick up on a little kernel, as it were, we'll call back to the popcorn, of Rob, you did something super nerdy recently, and then it led to something like even nerdier. Yeah. What's going on here? I went to a Star Wars X-Wing tournament because what else would I do with my free time?

And this is the miniature game, right? This is the miniature spaceship and then you roll dice and then you're like, hoo hoo. It's a phenomenal game. I've played it 100 years ago. It is phenomenal, except when I lose constantly, which is where I'm sort of at right now. I'm in a bit of a slump. But I went to this in-person tournament and was just getting stomped on just straight to the neck

and just flying over asteroids. You guys know how it is. Sure. And things weren't going well. But I did notice that there's a new Star Wars trading card game out. And of course, the fact that it says Star and Wars on it, I'm like, well, I must have this because this will make me feel better for the other inadequacies that I'm currently suffering

from. And it's just like a starter set. So you get two starter packs. And I was like, this is just a lark and cut to a week and a half later, I am on every Discord. I have listened to innumerable podcasts about it. Again, having played it maybe twice with a nine-year-old, and I'm like, I have to have everything. I'm going to keep opening packs. I'm going to get a showcase hyperfoil. Now, is this a collectible card game, a living card game? I never remember what the difference is. I don't know what the differences are. It's a trading card game. It's a TCG.

Oh, it's a TCG. So it's just set one. Everyone get on board. Hey, this is really what I want to talk to you guys about. If everyone buys it now, we could split a box. It's $120. It's like a nerd pyramid scheme. Six or seven booster packs.

But wait, now, do you buy? So that's the thing is you're creating your own deck based out of like, you could buy decks, but then you can buy expansion packs, booster packs as well. Yeah, yeah, it's like magic or whatever. You can buy two starter decks, so it sort of just helps on ramp you. It's basically like the first hit of crack.

The hook. Hey, do you want to try this real quick? This is two pre-made decks. They go against each other perfectly balanced. They're amazing. Hey, one's Luke Skywalker, it's a stick. Do you want to try this real quick? It's just two pre-made decks. They go against each other perfectly balanced. They're amazing. Hey, one's Luke Skywalker, one's Darth Vader. And then you can buy booster packs and then just build other decks or change out cards that are in your starter decks and then go nuts.

It's a tough hobby because you've got to have somebody you can play with and ideally in person. Norrie, did you ever get into any card games like this besides poker? I'm besides Blackjack. I'm starting to get into magic without completely going broke. I don't have also somebody to play with on a regular basis. But I do have I'm collecting a mass amount of the Crimson Vow decks, which is like vampire. Okay.

Yeah. Oh, those look pretty sweet. Innistrad Crimson Vow. Oh yeah, Innistrad. Innistrad is like the Ravenloft of magic. Oh, shit. So those are fun. I can control myself up until I go to conventions. And then I'm like, oh, let me buy everything during my bank account. Yeah, that's usually what happens.

Kate, you don't play, right? Or you dabble? No. I mean, I've got like friends who play magic. I just couldn't get into it. I've been told it's because I didn't do it right. Like, oh, don't play commander, play something else. That's gatekeeping. Somebody's gatekeeping you. Or try the app. It's so much easier. And it's just kind of like, I don't know. I don't need to like this. I've got other hobbies. And I also like solo hobbies. And I also am not allowed certain things

that I know will spiral. And I don't feel good. Like I collected Pokemon cards. I'm sorry, I say Pokemon. It's just easier to say. I think that's incorrect. What are you supposed to say? Pokemon. Pokemon.

Everyone knows what the fuck you're talking. Everyone's like, what is this? No, Pokemon. Anyway, yeah, I've done that and it wasn't pretty. I didn't like that side of myself when I was collecting those cards. So I'm not that open to magic. And I think it's okay.

I have like, you want to talk about nerdy stuff? I'm really, really into Sudoku right now. I cannot stop playing that stupid numbers game. I don't think about anything else when I'm in those numbers exactly where they need to go. I just think about all the numbers in front of me and I go, put it up, put it up, put it up, put it up. People still play Sudoku, that's a thing.

Only on Plains. Are you still doing Wordle too? Yeah. No, no, I have a specific Sudoku app that I paid for. Wow, money was exchanged. And it's playing very enjoyable, so. That's wild. Ross, I could see you having a couple of commander decks in your bag back there.

What's going on? You ever gotten to the L.C.G.? I'm a grown man. I'm a grown man. All of you were playing Pokemon Go. I was Pokemon going to the polls to vote to my conscience. I played Magic the Gathering back when I was in middle school and high school. I did like it, but I don't think I ever really grasped how the hell to actually play it ever.

It was just basically a bunch of cool pictures to look at and zone out about and dream about. But I did go to a very dorky high school for my freshman year of high school, and there were guys walking around with packs of magic cards like gunslingers, ready to go at any time with their highly crafted blue, white or black. I was just into black decks because it was like metal and got a moody. That's really all I know about it is there's lands, there's paintings. Man up. I don't know from magic, but I don't know. Maybe one day I'll give it a try. I've been going. It's interesting. So in an attempt to justify purchasing more of these Star

Wars cards, I've been trying to desperately price out my old Magic cards. Be like, this is going to send me to the top. It's like one drug for another. Exactly. It's just a way to look at my wife in the eyes. And be like, no, I didn't take money that we already had. I took money that I just got.

And that's what I'm spending. It's been great looking through the old cards and realizing how worthless they are, but also seeing the transition from art, from the quote, unquote, quality of art. You know in those old, super old D&D books when you see like- Oh, I love it. That's the thing. I used to hate that shit? I used to be like, this looks like garbage. But now, now they're so great. And so there's the equivalent of magic.

There's some, there's some, guys, there's some pictures in early magic that's like, what is this? What am I looking at? Oh yeah. Demented. I think it's stuff. Yeah. But then they'll have a quote from like William Shakespeare on the bottom.

Like they, they hadn't figured out their lore yet and stuff, so the flavor text was just like from Midsummer Night's Dream. All right. Yeah. It's just a pile of little non sequiturs all with paintings that look like they should be on the side of a van. Yes. Yes.

I really like that part of it, but I get smoked if I actually tried to play it because I just don't know how. Some of this early art was less side of a van and more like side of somebody's converse shoe that they were bored during class and scribbled on. Here's a dragon. Whenever I go to cons, I see people doing it and I'm like, man, I could get into that. Same thing with painting miniatures. I'm like, that seems like a fun little thing to do.

But I don't think it's something you can halfway do. You either do it and like that it consumes your life or you're just like, you know what? I'm making a choice. I am not going to get into this. It's a lot easier when you don't have physical friends. Yeah. But like I said, Troy, I don't know anything about this so-called game of magic, the so-called gathering.

But if you care to make it interesting, I suppose I might have some beginner's luck. That's something I could get into. Well, Troy, didn't you get like super – like baseball cards again or something during the pandemic? Yeah. I've talked about it now ad nauseam across the network, but yeah, I got way into it and stayed into it. Now I'm taking a little break.

Oh, okay. Yes. Taking a little break from the cards. But I mean, I set up an eBay shop. I was all about it. But that's a private hobby. That's why it works well for me. I mean, that's a whole other thing to it is when you start trying to work commerce into it. For me, I just want to make enough to buy more boosters and feel okay about my life. But I can see, I've just peeked past the curtain and seen this insane industry of people that are scalping cards or buying up boxes and boxes

of shit just so they can find the one thing, sell that for $500 and then flip other cards. It's nuts. See, I could get into that. Playing in the game? Not so much. But let's play this game. Sure. It's called, I don't know if you guys are familiar with this game, it's called Call of Cthulhu. It's put out by the sponsor of this show, Chaosium. We shout out to our friends at Call of Cthulhu. I think it's Cthulhu, not 100% sure.

Cthulhu, strange. That sounds weird. That seems like a name that wouldn't be able to be even spoken by a human. Such a beautiful game and we got to finally really take it out for a stretch last week. It's been a while since we stretched our call of Cthulhu muscles and it always reminds me how beautiful this system is once we start rolling dice and also how we all need to brush up on it. But still, I think we did pretty damn good all things considered.

We also talked about it. We don't have to talk about it now. I'm shocked. It's just, it's ridiculous at this point and it's really setting up a lot of false hope and a weird precedent because this isn't how these games are supposed to go. Now the original Mass of Neanderthal Tepp, when it came out, it was known for its lethality and the deaths were fast and furious, but most groups didn't make it out of New York. You'd have new characters coming in and out.

That's why the game constantly suggests like, hey, this NPC you just met, it'll say in the books like, this would make a good replacement investigator. Now when they redid it, with seventh edition or whenever they updated it, they made it slightly less lethal just so that characters could hang around a little bit longer. But the fact that all four of you have survived up until this point through some of the battles you've had and some of the roles that you had against a monster last week that had three attacks, it's just it's not really how it's supposed to go. But it's you guys are fated to succeed.

It's going to make the first death all the more crushing. But man, did we have some close calls last week. Let me do a quick little recap. We ended the previous week's episode where, you know, Mr. Vane, Lawrence Vane is taking you down so you can examine Eloise, maybe in her ghoul form, maybe not. Maybe she's not sure about if she's transformed or not. Gets down there, she's not sure about if she's transformed or not gets down there. She's gone Freak out he runs upstairs to make sure she isn't tearing through the house. You start looking around you found a secret wall

In the back of her dungeon it leads to this hidden shrine to Mordigian the this carnal deity of death Where the veins ancestors would perform all of these horrible acts. This was their shrine to Mordigian that existed seemingly unknowing unbeknownst to the current veins. That then leads to another secret door that leads into the mausoleum. They know about the mausoleum. They didn't know about this shrine.

So you realize now Eloise is on the loose. So you head into town as As you're heading into town, you hear wailing. You think that this is the creature and you find a drunk John Parkins wandering the countryside calling for his daughter who was one of the victims three months ago. I think he punches Lawrence in the face and you guys end up taking off from him. You get to town, you hear more screaming and you rush to the edge of town where you find Mrs. Osgood. She's the widow of the other victim of Eloise's first attacks, screaming that her daughters,

her two little girls, were taken by some beast. So you climb to the top of Montour. You walk amongst the ruins there, looking for any sign of where this creature could have went and you hear howls and screams coming from the other side of this hill. So you go down to the other side of the hill, you find the night watchman of Blue John Cavern, the guy who's guarding the mines has been basically dismembered. One fell swoop of a claw left his head barely hanging from his neck. You go into this dark dank mine shaft and

you find sort of a dead-end type situation where one of the young Osgood children is clinging to life and the other one is in the clutches of Eloise Vane come eight foot tall ghoul, horrible creature, gnawing on the leg of the other Ozgood girl. A vicious battle ensues. Multiple missed gunshots, shooting into melee, claw attacks, and you've survived, but everyone is messed up.

Carter has a major wound. Fae'ruz has a major wound. And yet again Vaughn is indefinitely insane. This happened to poor Vaughn last season, but it happened later in the season. And so you kind of stuck with it through the end of the season knowing that anytime you take sanity loss now it's gonna trigger a bout of madness. One point of sanity loss will trigger a bout of madness. But you were able to stick it out and you found time to recover the long boat ride over to England.

Now you're kind of in the thick of it. That time doesn't really exist. So it's just something you're going to have live with. And once again, you guys are gonna have this fawn on the edge. Meanwhile, Faeruz and Carter, you have received a major wound. And what that means is, essentially, because I think this is only the second time we've had a major wound, this happened to Margo in the season finale of season one. You basically don't recover hit points naturally at the rate of one per night like you would regularly until at the end of the week you make a successful con roll and even then a successful con roll will give you a couple hit points but you need an extreme success to remove

the major wound. However there is one other way to remove a major wound if you go above half your hit points. Now as fate would have it, as you are all touched by the gods, the dice gods, both Carter and Feroz were taken to exactly half their hit points. If within an hour of this fight someone successfully administers first aid to either of you, you will gain one hit point which will take both of you past the halfway point and will remove the major wound which means that every night you sleep you'll gain a hit point back if not you're gonna you're gonna be in rough

shape so much going on I don't even know where to begin let's start with a luck improvement role and then I don't want to talk I don't want know where to begin. Let's start with a luck improvement roll. And then I don't wanna talk. I don't wanna talk for the rest of the episode. I'm so tired. Mm-hmm. Luck improvement roll, very, very important. My luck right now is 13. Ooh, that's lucky, all right.

Once again, as always, this is a roll you wanna fail, and then you will get D10 luck back. Might want some luck. That's good. We're administering first aid. Got eight D10 luck back. Might want some luck. That's good. Yeah. Wait, I'm ministering first aid. Got eight points of luck back. Nice.

Eight points of luck. Lord knows I need them. I got 10, baby. Oh! Nice. Oh, beautiful. I got five. Yeah. I got five also.

Yeah! So I'm not the best at first aid, but I do have 30 in it, so I'm like, okay in it. Does anyone else have first aid? Yeah, let's talk through the skill. I mean, I do, but I'm wounded, so I don't think I could administer. Right.

Yeah. I'm like, yeah, I think- I've got a little bit. You got a little bit? What do you have for us? 33 is my score. Ooh, Larry Bird. I think I succeeded and got to check it.

I believe so, yeah, and you, during the development phase, you added some to that. All right, so you guys are sitting on around the 30% chance. Can Carter and Faibreuse do it to each other? Like can we crawl over to each other and be like, uh, because I got a 38. If I'm remembering correctly, looking through the keeper handbook and big shout out to Michael, who was very helpful behind the scenes during the prep today to remind me that like you still had a chance to remove this major wound.

But here's what it says about first aid on page 120 of the keeper's handbook. To be effective, first aid must be delivered within one hour, in which case it grants one hit point. Recovery this game is so unforgiving. It may be attempted once, with subsequent attempts constituting a pushed roll. We all know what happens when you fail a pushed roll. Maybe you take more damage. Might not be worth it.

Two people can work together to administer first aid, with a success granted if either one of them rolls a success. Okay. An exception is allowed when treating a dying character. Wherein the best that can be achieved with first aid is to temporarily stabilize the patient. So I would argue that you could be working on yourself while someone else is working on you just to make use of the rule that two up to two people can administer or attempt to administer first aid or you can know however

you want to play you'd be like there that's where it hurts there and you could roll but think of the combinations here also let's just let's just enter the scene here. So we ended this with Eloise as she dies transforms back into this beautiful young woman. Of course poor Vaughn, that's what he saw the entire time. This beautiful young woman viciously attacking you. The minute he snapped, he no longer saw the ghoul. He saw through the veil into this woman. Now you all see this woman take her last breath. Laurence Vane crawls across the wet mine and collapses on her weeping. There are

also two young girls clinging to life in addition to your friends. Now your friends have a major wound. You got an hour to deal with that. Walk me through what you want to do here. Oh, whoa. Okay. Well. Let the kids die? Can Von help while being indefinitely insane? Sure, he sounds like a piece of sound mind and body. Yes, yes, yes, of course. I, I, I, for God's sake, I was at a field hospital in Verdun.

Do you think I can deal with this sort of thing? I, I, for God's sake, I was at a field hospital in Verdun. Do you think I can deal with this sort of thing? It's just, it's very precarious right now. We've got, it's just us and we have children that we need to look at first and then we have our friends. Just want to make sure it's, breathe, breathe first. It's okay. Yes.

Let's turn on the medical brain. Yes, of course. I'm quite rational. Let's put all the other thoughts out of our minds. Enough, I'm quite rational, Sahara. I'm more rational than I've ever been because I can truly see. I didn't, I didn't merely see her.

And then I draw very close to Sahara. It's like, I saw the state of her soul. God, you see, has allowed me to see deeper than the flesh, which is corrupt, and this world which has fallen. I've seen to the very heart of things. This is a gift, Sauron. Don't worry, don't worry. That's terrifying. Okay. I guess let's go to the kids first. There's one that's worse off and one, or they're both kinda even. I feel like Carter, Carter got what,

I think I got gashed in the chest by this thing and he sorta like dropped like a sack of potatoes, but I feel like now that the smoke has cleared a little bit, Carter is sorta like, is like dazed and looks over and sees those girls, especially the one with the leg, and I think he just starts like crawling towards her yeah they got it these kids god damn shit guys you're okay to help for god's sake don't move tilling ass wait guys someone's gonna do stuff about the kids

shit we need all the help we can get honestly like none of us are doctors And we have no help out here I can I can help possibly not doing too great. Hey Bruce you look like shit So you my friend why that's impossible Fuck the half of your face that I could see No one's looking very well von I thinkn, I think we'll approach the girl who was getting gnawed and I mean, can we just kind of go down the line trying to get first aid on everybody? For sure, for sure. I mean, you see this girl, she is like white as a sheet from the blood loss and you look down at her leg and it looks like a mine

exploded in front of it. It's been chewed through halfway to the bone. You would think it's probably going to have to be amputated, but there might be a chance to stabilize her here. Or do an atonkid or something. Yeah, I mean, who knows? Extreme success, hard success, there might be a chance to save the leg. I mean, that's kind of what we're dealing with here. This was so great about, you know, we're so used to playing other d20 games where it's like magical healing Oh my god, my scars are all gone. This is like back

Best case scenarios stabilize or one hit point and you're still gonna be this should be a part of your role play for the next five episodes, right so Show we do this together then sour and I Or is this just shall I take a swing at this poor, poor, mauled innocent? I think together, two people is like the best chance we have. Right, let's do it. This is as long as someone passes.

All right, one success would do it, and let's see what level of success. You also have luck, but you've got your friends to deal with. One, two, three. Ah. I fail. Vaughn. I found you sour, I'm more lucid than I've ever been. Because I got a hard success.

Vaughn with the hard success. All right, so. You describing this as a mind injury, Troy, I think Vaughn is immediately seeing a young boy in speaking Belgian French at a field hospital with his leg just in ribbons and just Vaughn watching a field doctor kind of do what he needs to do to get this kid stabilized and Vaughn is ripping off his belt and tourniqueting this leg and trying to, and then talking,

it's like, don't worry, don't worry, call me yourself, call me yourself. You may not, you may not be able to stand on this leg again, but rest assured, my dear, your soul is safe. I love it. I love it. I think that there's a part of you, maybe as you came up to it, you thought the best way to stop this is to get rid of the leg and then turn the kit, but you, having that memory, think that maybe there's a chance part of this leg could be saved, you don't know, and you're able to wrap her up without any sort of amputation. Who knows what the future holds, but she is breathing,

and maybe a little bit of color is starting to come back to her face. You look across the mine over the weeping of Lawrence Vane and you see the other girl still breathing very shallowly. I believe I said she had a gash across her neck or across her chest with blood just coming out. Oh yeah. All right. Shall we just do it again? Let's go. I guess maybe you can see into people's souls. Yeah All right ready one two three That's a fail that's a fail

All right two fails Now we don't so favors and I can't do anything to the to this girl Probably not. Yeah, I'm not gonna make an argument in the end. Or we can punch. Or we can push. Yeah, I mean, I think the push would be good here. I don't wanna, you know,

weird with kids and stuff. I don't wanna get too dark, but like, obviously a failed push. You know, a little ugly. Oh God, oh God. So, we'll worry about the narration later. I'll take it easy, but there's a lot at stake here. Yeah. Don't worry about the narration later, I'll take it easy, but there's a lot at stake here. Um, yeah.

I mean, it's not like we can't just push it once. What's the worst that could happen? What's already happening? Yes, that's... That's real dark. Terribly stoic of you. So we're just like, no, no, this can't happen. So German. Yes. Look into her soul, help, look into her soul. We must keep trying.

And we push. Okay. Shall we push? Do it. We gotta. Does that mean that, okay, if two people push together, Troy, just so I'm clear, because one of us might succeed, one of us might fail, does the fail, how does that work? They both have to succeed. Let's see what happens.

I haven't thought this far in advance. All right, here we go. I pray for both of your souls. Oh no! Pass. Okay, it's not a fumble, but it's okay, I failed. 17 under 30, almost so hard. All right, a 94 over 33 for Vaughn.

That is a step one point away because you're That's just double jeopardy alright, so How many experience points is that You're fumbling around with like your confidence now because you helped the other girl so well and maybe I'm like no no stop You're like doing something wrong and I'm correcting it. I think if she were if her win- I know we're getting into like kid gore but if I'm seeing something that's like if it's the kind of thing like oh she's having trouble breathing we may have to open this up more. Right. And you slap away his hand

and you're able to stabilize the child. I think that during this, Vaughn, there's a moment where you're looking and it's almost like you can see through the child to her like musculature. You can see the blood like flowing through her veins and where there are blockages, almost like you're looking at an encyclopedia of a human body and layer after layer, you know, one of those like transparent images of the human body, where you just keep peeling it back to see like the insides. You're starting to see this and you just kind of shudder and fall back as Margo does the work to stabilize this child. Okay, that's fine. How are they? Are they okay? Did you guys do it? What

happened? The girls are fine. For now. We got to get them out of here. I'm gonna go to the streets of Fairuus. Uh... Right. I'm telling AST, let's have a look at you. Okay, okay, okay. And then I like, kind of like lift up a shirt or whatever, pull it aside. Just seeping. Oh, gross. You look terrible. Just think now we'll have matching...

You look terrible! We'll have matching scars. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha to pierce, open the skin like you're taking a butcher knife to a side of beef and the blood pouring out. So you're trying to stop the blood and see if you can help him regain one hit point. Let's see what happens. So I can help him on this, you said, right? If you wanna help or if you want to let Margo help. Yeah, like what if we're like verbally,

if we have better first aid, what if we're like verbally, if we have better first aid, what if we're like verbally instructing them what to do? Totally, exactly. Yeah. So. In my flask, you'll find some alcohol, could you please just gently pour that over? Gently! Gently! Pour the rest.

Pour the rest into this cave? You're so smart. Pour the rest of it into my mouth. You're telling us. Okay, fine. Hey, Vaughn. Yes? Like I kind of like put my hand on your face, I'm just like wrapping around the back of your neck like you get You got this okay? I trust you yes, of course

All right, buddy. Just guide me you tell me okay? Together now together and you can tell that I'm looking at you in an odd way And it's because Vaughn is like he's seeing the part portions of your caved in skull behind the mask. It's just like... Yes. Yeah, don't look at my face. Look down.

Look down. Look down. Okay, ready? That's a little... Okay. All right. Shit. Okay, I'm going to spend some luck and I'm going to make that a regular success.

You're very close. 35, uh, 30. You can spend two points of luck, make that a regular success. Carter, you gain one hit point and you lose the major wound condition. Great, I failed real bad. So, that's huge. Okay, you didn't fumble, though, right? I did not fumble. I got it in the 80s. Alright. Huge. Oh, man, I don't know why, because it all still hurts,

but I feel less majorly wounded. I feel more minorly wounded now. Thanks bud, I owe you one. Not at all, not at all. How are you getting along over there, Sawa? We've got alcohol, it's going to be fine. And I start, like, I start unbuttoning my blouse and just like tear, just like to tear, instructing,

like just tear these pieces off and, and uh, so Faeruz is, is shamefully there in, in just a chemisol. God forbid. Good lord! She's indecent! This is a children's show. And starts trying to like rip, rip, just grab onto one end. And we both try to like,

and I'm just like holding onto one so she could tear off parts of my shirt to like kind of wrap around the wound. Okay, got it. Is this enough? Yes. Do you want to have it gashed on your stomach? Yes.

Okay, I think, okay. All right, so who's rolling for Favruz here? Is it gonna be Favruz and Margo? Yeah, I think so. Okay. Yeah. All right, let's see these rolls. There we go. Oh!

Fail. I've failed. Do I spend 15 points of luck? It's either that or I could risk pushing again. Or do you want to spend the luck in how much luck do you have Nora? I have 17 points. If I spend 15 I get to live. I it, it might be worth it. Here's what I'll tell you. If you fail on a push, I'm going to say you lose another hit point, which would keep you further.

It would mean your major wound is going to stick with you for at least a week. So those are what you got to weigh out. Do you want that luck or do you want to live with this wound? Vaughn, you're looking over there and you see they're struggling. And you also look and like right behind where Feyruz is leaning against the wall is a bullet hole from your gun. And you realize you were just inches away

from blowing her head off when you fired into melee. Nora, do it. Just fucking spend it. But let me out the fuck. I'm gonna spend it. I don't want to risk it. Just think about how much easier it'll be to get more luck later with such a low luck.

That's true. You'll get luck every episode. All right, yeah, I'm gonna spend it to make that a regular success Wow Okay, one hit point back you lose the major wound condition and Everyone is it's some form of stable Lawrence all Pulls up his head. It's just got like snot and tears his face is all red. He looks around he's like Can you do it can you do it for her

whatever you're doing to the others can can you do it for her and he like lifts her up just limp in his arms look at her vein she's gone she's not been your sister for some time time. She was not a vein, sworn to Mordigian. We hear that in the darkness. Fawn. Creepy, creepy fawn. Just Ross's smile is getting insane Mordigian. He couldn't even help himself. The darkness of the cave evokes Mordigian. What What the hell do we do from here? I mean we leave the cave and with with the girls and I'm assuming the town is up

Yeah, I mean, I I kind of want to flash forward and talk about what happens rather than living through each moment But yeah, I imagine you you come out, you return the girls. Because we told the constable to come to meet us. So maybe he ran up. Yeah, so if this is all happening, you see the constable coming and he's got a jacket over his night clothes with a flashlight and out walks Lawrence with Eloise in his arms. Out walks the rest of you, cradling the young girls and the whole

town by now is like a big portion of the town is over by the mines and so we assume there's some sort of reconciliation we move on are you staying it's it's Monday night February 9th I believe are you staying in Lesserie Dale for the funeral are you getting the hell out of town? I think I imagine there's this moment maybe where we see you the next day and Lord Arthur Vane is just like I don't know you outside a plum castle and you just see Lord Arthur Vane in the window looking down on you and he just closes the curtain.

It's nothing to do with you. Any chance of having him on your side? He's gone. Just because he killed his daughter? What the fuck? What do you see happening from here? Obviously just thinking in terms of the larger story, you came out here to investigate a lead from one of Jackson's things he was interested in

the scoop, you're going to stop at Henson manufacturing, which is also outside of town, trying to follow up on this built in safe, what the hell that is. But then they were closed and so you continued on to here. This is a cryptid door. Also Eagles Grange and then a week from tomorrow is the full moon and you know that a truck is showing up to the Blue Pyramid Club bringing a bunch of people outside of London on the full moon and you feel like there's something significant there. If anything, that's your biggest lead at this point. And there's Eagles Grange. See, that's the thing.

I know that we kind of ruined our thing with the veins. I was thinking maybe stay for the funeral and see if we can get back in their good graces. But if it, like our timeline is pretty tight, so. I mean. Yes. How much time do we need again for Carter and Ferris to

Recover a little bit now. It's just a point of day point a day. Okay, okay? I'll say I like that. I like that thought of trying to get Back into the veins good book somewhat If we could attend the funeral and then maybe off to Vaughn's ancestral home. I mean, I feel like part of the argument there is... The rest and recover for a bit? Yeah, the argument is for rest and recovery. Like, we have a home base that we will not have anywhere else, which is your family home.

So, seems like after that kind of an ordeal I think what yeah, I feel like we would stick around I mean, I'd like to think we would stick around for the funeral even without the potential of getting in the Lord's good graces, but And then I think yeah, we we fuck off to Eagles Grange Maybe we can hit the maybe we can hit the safe company on the way back to London and still make it for the full moon We got a week before we could save a bunch of more lives, let's go All right, so you retired to the laughing horse And

You wake up the next day are you like gonna leave Where everyone else wakes up? Are you gonna stick around to like try and what are you thinking? If we've attended the funeral, I think we're we bounce but. Oh, so you want to stick around? I mean, the funeral might not be for a couple of days. Oh, a couple days. I mean, then we can maybe do the safe warehouse first while we're waiting for the funeral? If we're staying? That's a lot of trouble.

I had a question. Yeah, yeah. Are we at Eagle's Grange, is there any kind of an event happening that we have to talk about or we just go in there to chill? about or we just go in there to chill? Yeah, is there a reason why we're going to your equal screen outside of just visiting and resting? You made it, I don't know, you just feel like something's up. Well, of course, one always enjoys a trip to the country when one isn't bedeviled by family curses, the like of which we've just experienced. But I suppose if, of course, Miss Gibran is amenable, we could give my family the happy news. Yes.

This is not quite how I pictured meeting your family No of course, of course, uh, miss Shabran, I I suppose we'll have to Come up with some sort of cover story for why You and mr. Tillinghast are so woefully shredded. I don't think, um, I don't think Mother would take kindly or think too rationally about, um, the idea that we've been torn apart by a ghoul tainted girl.

I don't know, I think we fixed them up pretty good. You guys almost look good as new. I think a train ride another day You'll look fine. Just leave your shirts on. Yeah, we could say what kind of sports you got on this island What do we got here? We got the football Right with the soccer ball. We could say we're playing that and just kicked each other really hard Just some sort of co-ed soccer league, which I'm sure... Quite unlikely, but some co-ed rugger, some co-ed cricket. Yes, perhaps you crashed rather aggressively into the wicket, stealing hats and impaled yourself.

Depth perception and all that. We could just go to my go to horse. It's been running, jogging on a horse. What's that called? Horse ride horseback riding. Jogging on a horse. Horse jogging. You could say you're recovering from surgery, elective surgery. That's as though.

That's your gallbladder removed. Yeah. I don't even know if they've discovered that yet Our chats may be like wow the gallbladder wasn't covered. Yeah. All right. We just had to revitalize our humors Good old tonic, I mean assuming we're not like bleeding through our shirts. We should be okay Mm-hmm. Yes. Yes, I think it would be rude to ask about a limb if you don't have this information Try this brain slurry So something I was thinking about guys you two fairs and Vaughn lovebirds if you will Listen we don't know,

we don't know if we're gonna get the shot again, right? I say, you guys, let's fucking tie the knot. Let's do it at Eagles Grange. I will officiate. Let's get the servants out, whip out the linen. You know, the china. Let's go. Let's move life to the fullest.

What are we doing? We almost died. What do his parents object? Oh, hello, life to the fullest. What are we doing? We almost died. What are his parents object? So go nice to meet you. I've almost died and I look a mess but hello I'm here to marry a son and it's going to happen this weekend. Yes. Are you mad? my The engagement I suppose will already be rather shocked tillinghast um and

One week to plan and execute a nuptial such as that is rather hasty. What we just went through, you're fucking worried about planning nuptials and all that garbage? We could never, we ought to save a van full of people next week, what if we die during that? You guys never had a chance to do this fake wedding.

I think it's a great opportunity. Oh, Pazer has gone soft. Besides, I thought this would be a good time for Oh, Carter has gone soft. Besides, I thought this would be a good time for you, Vaughn, to even just tell me about your family in general. Yes, yes, of course. Well, we'll have plenty of time on the train ride. Anyway, I'm throwing it out there. Think about it.

I may or may not have already started writing the speech, but do what you wanna do. So we're heading to Eagle's Grange. Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga. We maybe, did we go to the funeral? That was hanging over us, are we bailing? Seems like the- It's gonna take a few days for it to happen.

We had to wait for the- Off to Eagle's Grange, baby. Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga. We gotta go, I'm sorry. I almost think- It's gettingange, baby. Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga. We gotta go. I'm sorry. I almost think that any type of service might be private. Once the town finds out some semblance of the true story, however they spin it, it's not going to look good for the veins.

I don't think they're going to make a big public procession out of this might just she might just be putting the mausoleum and a private service with the vicar I mean only yeah it's it's it's bad news so yeah maybe the next morning you get everybody gets one hit point back after a full night's sleep the next morning you just wait for that that cart got somebody with a cart to take you back to the train station Oh god, we gotta wait for the fucking car. Okay One cart guy, I'm sure you find a local cart Cartman mod cons to to take you there

this was obviously a what's known as a sidetrack scenario for the campaign and similar to... Now he tells us. What? You know, I have considered not even mentioning it in the scoop, but I was just like, no, there's so much here that I think enriches the campaign and I know we would have so much fun with it. And I mean, my God, what a foolish mistake that would have been to skip that.

And also, uh, there is a development phase which did not go well for you guys, but it's just, it was an impossible situation and it's meant to be an impossible situation. The best case scenario may have netted you a couple of sanity back, but based on the choices that were made and what happened, you all lose 1d3 sanity. The fuck? We saved these girls lives! I know, I know, I know. And so because of that, I'm gonna say you lose 1d3 minus 1. For saving the girls lives, I will give you, you know, one, you have a chance of taking no sanity loss.

And there is not a bout of madness from this, This is just sort of like the equivalent of negative XP. So 1d3 minus one. I wanna know, I'm gonna go to fucking GameFAQs or whatever and find out what the walkthrough of this level was supposed to be. What are we supposed to do? I mean, I can focus later. I wanna go to Nintendo Power and see what the hell

I was supposed to do. I wanna go to the Nintendo Funland. I lost one. I lost two. Me's the Nintendo fun line. I lost one. You lost one. Me too. I lost two. Okay, so. But if I lose one, Troy, even in this circumstance.

I lost one. Yeah, no bout of madness. Cool, cool, cool, cool. You're crazy enough. Get your shit, yeah, go, go. So, you know, as the sun is rising, see you guys on a little ox cart, making your way back to the one little train station,

miles away from the town and you see the town sort of recede a little village recede in the distance mom tore with its ruins and in the distance plum castle with this strange little village full of weird constables and uh drunks like old Bill just fade away. And the next thing we see is all of you in a car driving along a desolate but beautiful country road. It's a rare sunny day, maybe the first sunny day you've had since you arrived in England. It's peeking through the clouds but maybe you'll get a day without rain. And in the distance you see this impressive manor house, long white picket fence, lush acreage.

I mean just so much land. Obviously you see, you know that Vaughn is a man of means. You see where this comes from. I imagine there's this horses moving about a large stable. In fact as you arrive you see there's a lot of activity going on, more than you expected, Vaughn. Not only a lot of activity, but a lot of people. Just like you know there are the servants, the staff that work at Eagle's Grange, but

there seems to be a dozen if so other people milling about. You see, in fact, there is a parking area that has been added to the estate grounds with half a dozen cars there. And you pull up to Eagle's Grange Certainly seems to be a Crackling here. Um, Jesus Christ. You grew up here. This is a fucking this is insane. Is it always just bustling? Oh Hardly. I mean, quite often Mother is in town, by which I mean London, of course, but of late she tends to retire here. But yes, I don't get into it often, but Father was a minor aristot.

You don't say? Yes. or a Risto, you don't say. But yes, to the point of the crowd, I do wonder what exactly is happening. And I'll vault over the door of the car and get my fiance out by the hand, and you can tell I'm nervous All right, so the rest of you yeah good and um, yeah, I'm kind of poking around like seeing who I can see All right. So you you help faerus out Margo Carter get out maybe Carter tries to mimic you. She helps Margo out. What are you doing?

Milady? Sorry. Yeah. Is this not what? I can't get out. I know you can, but look at all these people. They're all looking at us. Who knows what's going on backwards.

Oh, are we supposed to do the gender roles? Okay, yes, thank you very much, sir. No problem. Oh, sir. Kind. Meswitty. You step out the car. The car takes off.

Give Hargo a wink. Ah, yes, uh-huh, uh-huh. She blinks both eyes at you. You open up a gate and there's a long walkway that leads up to the door. As you go up to the gate gate you notice a sign there that certainly wasn't there the last time you visited. How long do you think it's been since you've been to Eagle's Grange? The last time I was here was between Peru and New York.

There's a room right up there that was a sort of combination bedroom and study on the second floor that I can look through the window. And it's packed with books and correspondence and letters that I was sending to back and forth to Jackson Elias. His books are there on my shelf. Little knickknacks and trinkets from my travels to Asia and Peru are there, as well as like correspondence with the rest of the Mystery Squad. And the last time I was here was then, and it was then that I received, of course, the telegram that brought me to New York and back into the ranks of the Mystery Squad. But it's been that long. Quite a bit has happened since then.

Rich with incident. I'll sign. But what's this sign? What? Who's doing redecorating around Eagles Grange? It's a, I mean, the sign looks like it was made yesterday. It's definitely very, very new. It says Eagles Grange, bed and breakfast.

Oh, fuck! The cigarette falls out of my mouth. And I'm like, just jaw on the floor. You never told me this was a hotel. I love a B&B. It isn't. Why haven't we been staying here? The bloody hell is going on. And I'll almost kick down the door as I walk right in.

You get up, there's like a wraparound porch and there's probably like half a dozen people out there having coffee or tea probably and scones. They're sitting about and they're looking at you and then an older man comes out dressed in the classic livery of a English butler and I imagine this is the family butler that was around before you were born his dad was the butler and then he was a hereditary job but I mean he's been the butler your entire life. Say his name is Giles. He's very old. He's got big jowls and no hair whatsoever. He's bald like a cue ball. And he's like, in shock

when he sees me. I was not expecting you. It is so good to see you. Maybe he like looks like he wants to hug you but realizes he can't do that. There's all sorts of rules here and he's wearing the same outfit but he has this like little crest that says EGB&B on it. He just kind of bows to you and says, I wasn't expecting you should have called. We could have got a room ready for you. Yes, I really had to dash, Giles. I've only been in country a few, barely a week. Excuse me, might I have a word? Of course, you brought friends.

Carter's like, must be his dad. Let's go get some scones. Oh yeah. Giles, if you could be so good as to help um help Mr. Braun miss our with a luggage. I'm sure I'm sure tilling ass can manage or I can yeah, I got it No, perhaps. No, we have we have stuff that now hold on and he snaps his fingers and like three other guys come out and Grab your bags. You don't recognize these guys at all. This is Elmer. Oh yes, I imagine from the look that your mother did not inform you of the changes to Eaglet's Grand. No, I've heard nothing, Giles Button. God's name is going on here.

Well, it's not really my place to talk about this. I'm sure you'd want to hear it from your mother. Your friends, will you be staying here during a visit? Yes? All of you? I imagine we have enough rooms. I'll have to check. Why don't you come to the front desk? The front desk? Yes, I certainly hope that you imagine that there are enough rooms here And you come inside and it's like being completely redecorated everything's been moved around there's a staff There's like a front desk where it used to be like a broom closet Like everything has been completely redecorated a wall has been taken down and opened up so that people can congregate And there are several guests here. And I imagine it's just like.

Yes, roll for sanity. Yeah, roll for sanity. Roll for sanity. Sanity roll for reality. I'm kidding. But this is a lot pressing on you. Yeah, there was like a huge painting of like a cavalier with like a King Charles spaniel.

And that's gone. Everything is now woefully middle class. Now it's just a pastoral landscape painting. Mr. Phineas, are you all right? You seem unwell. I don't like your color either. Yeah.

Yes, I'm drawing a handkerchief out and mopping his brow, which is broken out into a fine glass of sweat. One comes home expecting to find the comforts to which one is accustomed, Giles. I've experienced a great deal over the past, for heavens, over the past week, much less the past months. I was hoping for some relaxation and found that, uh, found that you're not, not my trusted household servitor, but have turned into a bloody hotelier! Where is Mother? Yes, I'm sure I can. And a guy comes over and he's's like excuse me. Excuse me. Can I get some towels in the oak room? I mean we ran out of towels in the oak room and he's like, oh, yes

I don't even look at him oak room. We will get the oak room. Yes, that would have been Is he talking about Bertie's room? Yes, that would have been birdies room, but everything has been repurposed. In fact Your room has been repurposed as well. It's called the library. By the flayed skin of St. Bartholomew! I'm going to, I'm like almost running upstairs. Following. Darling! Mr. Villiers, please, someone is occupying that room right now. And... Please, someone is occupying that room right now.

And... Alright, so you just start running upstairs to go to your room and he's like feebly trying to follow you. Maybe Faeruz is coming with you. And you go up to the room and you go to open the door and it's locked. Knocking, knocking, knocking. He's coming. Please, no, Mr. Fereus. And all of a sudden, the door opens up and there is a man in a bathrobe. And he has one of your books in his hand.

Shall I be sorry to rise you from your supine comforts, old boy, but I couldn't help but notice that you're in my room. I'm sorry, I don't understand. I rented this room with my wife last three days ago. We're here until tomorrow. I'm terribly sorry, I had no idea that I was a rentier. And what are you doing with my copy of Africa's Dark Sects? That's what I was gonna renier, and what are you doing with my copy of Africa's Dark Sects? I'm sorry.

So it's a... Your copy. I'm sorry, do you work here? The audacity. Yeah, Vaughn goes even paler. He's already quite pale. And he's like, I most assuredly do not, sir. You are standing in my room.

Uh, Giles! There is my mother. Giles comes up to us. I'm so sorry, Mr. Williams. Um, please, this is just a misunderstanding here. We'll send up some free scones later and he closes the door. Mr. Filious, you must contain yourself. Please speak with your mother. All shall be made clear. Yes, all shall be made clear. All shall be made clear. I'm certain my offence is nothing that a couple of fresh scones won't fix. Please, please, we don't want to upset the guest, Mr. Filious. If you would just follow me I will inform your mother of your arrival and she will speak with you, please.

And your friends can enjoy the front porch. Enjoy the front porch? I will take a few scones, by the way. I'm outraged! The new kitchen staff makes a wonderful set of pastries for the guests. Wrap those up for me, thank you. You can speak with your mother right this way. And he brings you downstairs and through this common area. And there's just people everywhere. There's people everywhere.

They've turned this beautiful estate into a bed and breakfast. And he stands outside the drawing room. At least that hasn't been changed, or maybe it has. He says, just a moment, civilians. I shouldn't have done that. And he opens up the door, goes in, comes back. Your mother will see you now, right after this quick break.

Hi, I'm here to tell you about Good Morning Night Vale. Welcome to Night Vale's official recap show and unofficial best friend food podcast. Join me, Meg Bashwiner and fellow tri-hosts, Hal Loveland and Symphony Sanders, as we dissect all of the cool, squishy, and slimy bits of every episode of Welcome to Night Vale. Come for the insightful

and hilarious commentary and stay for all of the weird and wild behind-the-scenes stories. Good morning Night Vale, with new episodes every other Thursday. Get it wherever you get your podcasts. Yes, even there. Greetings, adventurers. Today we're excited to introduce you to a new story, Dark Dice, a horror podcast that blurs the line between actual play and audio drama, where the story is determined by the role of the dice. Six adventurers embark on a journey into the ruinous domain of the Nameless God. They will never be the same again. One of the players is now what they seem after a doppelganger, a creature that can assume the form and voice of whatever it kills, infiltrates the team. As the players are picked off and replaced one at a time, can they figure out who the monster is before it's too late? Can you? Here's a quick example of what our show sounds like.

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We're finally at Eagles Crane. Giles steps aside and bows and the door is cracked. You walk in and your mother is standing there. I imagine she's dressed like kind of what I imagine. Have you ever seen Bullets Over Broadway? Ages ago. Woody Allen? Not enough so I could, yeah. Diane Wiest plays this like over the top actress. Please don't speak, don't speak.

But like has this like, I'm imagining like old Broadway kind of like a maim, long flowing robe. It's a costume really in her new role, in her new role as the owner of a bed and breakfast. And so after speaking with Giles she must have stood up to greet you and I mean who else could play her it's got to be like a Judi Dench type character but she's all done up and she she holds her arms out to you and it's like Vaughn oh Vaughn it is

so good to see you. Come here, my son. Yes, yes, mother. Dreadfully good to see you. Oh, you've grown so thin. You've grown so thin, Vaughan. What are they feeding you? Wherever it is, you have gone.

My goodness. You've lost all that muscle tone that you had when you were in the service. Yes, Mother. Um, my diet has been rather neglected somewhat. I've had my mind on other affairs. But, um... You're probably smoking too much, too. I can smell it on you.

It's nothing wrong with 10 or 20 cigarettes a day, but once you start smoking thirty to forty, instead of eating it's far too much for... Mother, it's fine. It's fine. I can quit whenever I want. It's fine. I'm going to have one right now. Yes. I was talking about cigarettes. Would you like one? I'll indulge you as well. Allow me. I'll light hers. Aren't you sweet.

So, um... What brings you to Egel's Grange? You should have called, you didn't even say. You had mentioned that you had some business in New York and that you were coming back here, but I didn't know when. I imagined you were a bit shocked by the changes, yes? Yes, it's been a whirlwind series of months, Mother. I've only lately returned in country, as it were.

I thought I might surprise you, pop in, as it were. Little did I realize that the true surprise would be for yours truly, when I walked through our drawing room to find two of your tenants doing what I think was a puzzle. Yes, I do apologize. I would have told you, but you're always so busy doing God knows what. I didn't want to, I didn't want to tear you away. I knew that eventually you would come home to see your mother. My mother?

Mother? Why didn't you tell me that you were on hard times? I didn't know I needed to learn these things. It's not about money. It's not about money, Vaughan. Ever since your father passed, I've grown lonely, as you could say. My bones ache and I can't make the trip into London as much as I used to, and I miss being around people. Megalsgrange is cavernous with only the help to talk to.

It's not as if my son comes to visit every week. Certainly, mother, there must be friends that you could contact. Father Dimwitty? Oh, Father Dimwitty comes every Sunday and we read scripture together. But it's not the same. My friends had them forever. I need to meet new people, Vaughn. But why must you play the base role of the town matron?

Oh my god. It is not the base role. And there's a man named Williams in a bathroom in my room doing the devil knows what. Yes, Mr. Williams and his wife checked in a few days ago. We had a bit of a problem with the – we call it the library now. I imagine that must have been difficult for you to see. But yes, we had a tenant in there a couple of days ago that wanted to switch rooms. Anyways, Mr. Williams and his wife just took over.

I might be able to move them again, but it would be rather awkward. Well, we can discuss that. We have so much to discuss. What brings you to London? Well, I... Well, I suppose what brings me to London is a continuation of my tour.

I think I told you that I went to New York only at the behest of a very good friend. And I have, of course, reacquainted myself with this lot, a mother. What lot? Oh yeah, so maybe we're by the door. Awfully, oh, re there. Carter's got, maybe We're by the door like We there

Carter's got just kind of like maybe they'll yeah Carter will open the door be like I thought got to ask some of these scouts Yeah, I'm sorry. I mean interrupt. This must be you never told you grew up in a hotel. This is so cool Who are these people? Are these friends of yours? Oh, I'm sorry, madam. Oh lady Duchess Carter Tillinghast Best friend of von Villiers here your son. Also here we have Margo Sauer Pleasure. And Feroz Jabon, you're gonna want to really talk to her

Uh, thank you sir. Well thanks. So you brought your friends here. I was under the impression you intimated that this business you were doing had something to do with the military, perhaps. You mentioned tours and whatnot. You've got an American, a German, and this exotic young lady. That was great. Lovely. We form, uh, mother, oh, tell her we're sorry. We form a rather cosmopolitan set, yes. What are we called, Vaughn?

Tell her the name, tell her the name. Show her it's a card. I've got it right here, card. Very well. Mother, we are, the Mystery Squad. LLC, here you go. It gives her the card.

Um... I don't mean to be rude. Any friend of my son's is most welcome here at Eagle's Grange, bed and breakfast. But I have not seen my son in some time, and wish to speak with him. Oh yeah, go right ahead. We'll be right here. Give us a moment.

Yes, perhaps we could catch up. Yes, and we will speak later in the salon. We usually gather at night with all the guests. I think you'll find it's a rather interesting group. Okay, yeah, sorry to interrupt. We'll just stand over here in the corner. No, just if you could go out. Oh, out of the room.

Got it. Yes, out of the room, got it. Yes, out of the room, that would be best. Just while I catch up with my son. Thank you so much. And she shuts the door. Okay. And I just, as we're being shooed out, I just turned to Vaughn, like, good luck.

I just throw you a little like, I know. See what I'm dealing with? She turns and now her expression has changed. Vaughn, what is the meaning of this? Who have you brought into our home? I brought my friends, mother. People that I've been traveling with for a great deal of time, with whom I share. Rather curious and...

Rather line of work, I suppose. We've been entrusted, as I might say, the executors of the estate of my friend. Not so much a remuneration in terms of a legacy, but rather to tie up the loose ends of the mission that he was undertaking. It's rather complicated, Mother. Long story short, we're finishing a book. So we're going to have to make the appropriate inquiries, do various and sundry research. I imagine that this will take us not only to England, but perhaps out of the country again. But these are doubty adventurers that I trust with my very life.

Stout and Hardy, all of them, as much as any that I met in the Fusiliers. And they're a good lot. I had hoped, after the ordeals that we'd been through since we arrived, that we could have some time for rest and recuperation, but it seems as though where I thought they might be able to kick back and reminisce about the old times is currently a great number of people awaiting a continental breakfast. Well, first of all, we do currently have vacancies,

so I'm sure we can accommodate you and your friends. We're not going to turn you away. You are family after all. As to what you are doing, as always, as it always has been, it is none of my business. But as long as you are happy and safe, it is fine with me. But you don't look well, Vaughan. You seem hurried and out of sorts. I don't care for your tone or anything. If you are in danger, you know you can tell me.

Trust me, Mother. I know finally what duty is that Father was always going on about. is that father was always going on about. And be like me Vaughn. I fought the Bors Vaughn. Why can't you go and give it to the Hun Vaughn? Yes, I know. I know what duty is now. I found a sense of purpose mother. I found my faith once more mother. A deep abiding and a golden faith which I can devote myself and these people are the engine upon which that turns. Well, I like to hear that, as your father always said, but guard first and your family a close second and prosperity shall be yours. At least you listen to that part of his advice. and prosperity shall be yours. At least you listen to that part of his advice. Yes, in what of the prosperity?

But must you really open our house to stockbrokers and ironmongers from God knows where? Oh, Vaughn, don't be so old fashioned. We've always opened our doors to family and friends caught traveling betwixt London and the North. I just saw an opportunity to capitalize on what was right in front of me. It's growing the family wealth. Who knows one day perhaps it will come to you. Yes, I suppose so. I only thought that here was some last Sylvan bastion of Albion, as yet untainted by the Claws of Commerce, I come home to what I thought would be a temple to Athena, and find it transformed to a temple of Mammon.

Mother... Forgive me, it is rather a shock. I understand, and I... I am sorry for not... keeping abreast of my plans. I suppose I've not returned in kind. I... I don't write you as often as I should, I know. Well, you're here now, and we will just get used to this new normal together. Yes, and then... I miss you, you know.

I miss you. I have not seen you. Yes, Mother. And I worry sick about you. I know we've had our differences and our disagreements, but it is good to see you. Yes, it is good to see you. It's delightful, in fact, and to the point of family, I... It is good to be family here once again, and family that um loves one another

joined again with potential for growth Of course yes, that's what family is all about And with me As it were well um if you can find room in your ledger for extra rooms, I would appreciate becoming a tenant if it's not too much trouble, my friends and I. Yes, I'm not sure if we have four rooms available, but I'm certain we could make one, possibly even two, unless there are two young ladies and there was another gentleman.

There seemed to be something wrong with his face. I didn't get a good look at him before I politely asked them to leave. I hope they weren't offended. I just haven't seen you in a while and I wanted to catch up. Mother, try to have a mordicum of tact. Yes, yes. Tilling has just removed the veil of mystery, suffered a rather unfortunate horse accident. It's best not spoken of. Oh, yes.

Well, I certainly wouldn't bring it up in front of him, but you're my son, I can ask you. And the young women, who are they to you? Well, as I say, they're my friends and companions. The young Miss Sour is a rather bohemian sort. We'll find her, yes, a rather flinty, Germanic lady, but good when your back's against the wall, I dare say, and with a keen and aesthetic sense, which I confess I lack. And then, of course, there is Miss Gibran. Pleasure to meet.

Late of America, she's an academic. Very wise indeed. Very decorated academic. Yeah? Good for her. I'd like to see you commingling with the people of higher breeding. Would do here. Wonderful. Well, perhaps we should go into the other room and get you settled, as it were. I imagine the staff handled your bags, but I don't know if I can move you into the other room and get you settled, as it were. I imagine the staff handled your bags, but I don't know if I can move you into the library this evening, but let me see what I can do. I want to make sure you're comfortable here. It was always my plan. I wanted you to come home and enjoy it in

the way that I was enjoying it. I didn't mean it to be such a shock. If there's nothing else, shall we go to the other room? I suppose there's nothing else, shall we go to the other way? I suppose there's nothing else, although I do owe dear old Giles an apology. I'm afraid I acted rather raw. I only see now that if I'm to return to Eaglesgrange, I must write you a month in advance to make sure that there are vacancies. No, don't be that way, Fawden. You can come home anytime you want. Don't worry about old Giles, he loves you like a son. Yes, mother. And yes, let's return to the gang.

All right, come now. And she grabs your hand. You lead her back out there to the salon and there's just lots and lots of people around. She's like, I'm so sorry, she says to three of you, I'm so sorry to have asked you to leave the salon. I just haven't seen my son in so long and he if we can get you appropriate rooms. I'm going to try and get at least two rooms, one for the young ladies and one for the gentlemen. Well, that won't be exactly necessary, Mother. I think perhaps the division of the rooms should proceed another way.

I don't understand. You want to have your own room and subjugate your friends to a room? I do have a room that has two beds. I can check and see if it's available. We'll put your friends. Yes, that would make sense. This is your home. You probably want to have your own space. Let me just check with the- Oh, not my own space, Mother. I'm- What's that? Forgive me for not speaking it out right, but as I said, it has been a very... eventful several months, rich with incident.

I have not, of course, formally introduced you to my dear, dear friends, but one, of course, supersedes that label. Allow me to formally introduce... Edith Villiers to the divine Fae-Ruz Gibran, my fiancé. As Fae-Ruz extends her hand, it's a pleasure to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you. Pleasure to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you Fiance Well, if only No, no it did not come up he mentioned your academic background

Yes, mother you are engaged she just kind of like mindlessly extends her hand into yours But as you see, Mother, time reveals all sorts of surprises. Yes, if only your father had lived to see it, perhaps this miracle would rouse him from the grave. I was unaware you were even courting anyone, Vaughn, being always so busy with your other interests. Well, one knows how it is. One cannot choose when the dart of Cupid strikes you. And I have been favored by the acquaintance and the companionship of Mr. Braun, and we have decided to make a dash at it. Life is full of wonderful surprises, isn't it?

Indeed it is, yes. Well, you are most welcome here. Yes, so no harm if we're allowed to share a room. As for Miss Saur in Tillinghast, I'm sure they can put a curtain up between the sides of the room or something. Ah! Since you don't think it'll cause a scandal, Mother. Oh no, I... Let me see what I can arrange. And she goes off. Well, I thought that went rather well. That's what's well. Oh, that was delightful.

I don't understand how it worked. When you were a kid, did you get have to pay like a weekly rate to live here? Or did you guys get like a month? Did you guys live here or did you guys get like a month? Tillinghurst? No. No. This was not an inn. I was a boy at Tillinghurst. This seems to be a late and rather recent hobby of my mother, to stave off the loneliness of her dotage. She should just join a bridge club.

I'm saying! I've seen a lot of Americans around here. They seem pretty cool. Someone was talking about like how they peed in a fountain in the backyard or something like that. They got real drunk. I guess I think they're serving screwdrivers. What?

Yeah. And I'm like throwing open curtains like. There are several people walking about, staff you don't recognize. Yeah like throwing open curtains like There's several people walking about staff you don't recognize you look out the window you see people are taking like horseback riding lessons at the stable there are people playing a croquet out on the lawn is like this giant chess set Bunch of people doing stuff Isn't it all simply charming? Fresh plate of scones buzzes by.

You see there are some people looking at you. One stands out in particular. It's this woman, middle-aged. She's got this old Victorian-style dress with a cascade of pink ribbons that has been sewn along the sort of seam all the way down her leg and she's eyeing each of you and she looks troubled by something. She closes her eyes and twitches ever so slightly. Is that one of your old people, people who used to live here?

Who's that lady? No, I, am I right in thinking I've never seen this person before? Never seen him before in your life. Your mother comes back over. Well, lucky you. We were able to find two rooms. I couldn't get you into the library, as I mentioned, Mr. Williams and his wife just took it over. We had another gentleman in there just a night ago and he said he was hearing voices and wanted to be moved to another room. So we had to move him out and we had Mr. Williams and his wife take over. I would feel rather strange moving them yet again. Yes, one wouldn't want to inconvenience Mr. Williams.

Oh, don't be that way. Sorry, mother. So. Don't be that way. Sorry, Mother. So we'll take whatever accommodations you can provide. The hayloft, I suppose. Well, have some tea. Mr. Tillinghast, is it? Yes, of the New England Tillinghast. I'm sure your family has heard of my former family as well.

I know we're new money and all that, but... No, I'm sorry, I haven't. I'm very busy, but you're going to be. I'm sorry to say this, but watching Carter and interact with my mother, an elderly wealthy woman, I'm just like looking at Carter like. I was thinking the same thing. New money.

Well again, it was a pleasure to meet you, madam, and he like kisses the top of her head. Oh, me too. Feruze looks over at Margo, just for a reaction. This doesn't seem right, but it's funny. You kiss the top of her hand and like, it's half lip, half mask, and she's like, oh, it's cold. Sorry, just that old familiar papery skin feel.

You and Ms. Sauer will be in the billiards room. I already asked the staff to bring your bags. We can sort out whose bags or whose, but we'll take care of all that for you. And Vaughn, my child, you and... I'm sorry, I don't remember your name. Miss... Gibran.

Soon to be Vilias. Right. Miss Gibran and my son, you will be in the Cascade Room. Wonderful. What's the, is it your honeymoon suite? What is your accommodations for new young lovers? It used to be guest quarters, but we've added some sconces. Do you guys have an event center here? I'm just wondering. Make yourselves comfortable and we'll see you for, I guess, lunch or perhaps dinner.

I have some things I need to attend to. Excuse me, Mother. Mother, before you depart. Yes. And I might lean in. Don't wish to be rude, but this rather natally retired woman across the room has been eyeing us rather probingly. Ten interviewers? Yes, sir. Her name is Miss Jasmine Pink. She hails from London. I can't remember where it is she's traveling.

Interesting young woman. She's a, well, how do you call She's a medium. I caught her last night. She was reading people's fortunes with tarot cards and the like. A very interesting young woman. You see all manner of people come here to Eaglesgrange B&B. Yes, Eaglesgrange, the crossroads of the world. Well, thank you, Mother. Fascinating. Make yourselves comfortable. We should talk later. Yes, you wish, Mother.

Once you're settled. Right. Goodbye. Nice to meet you. She does not respond. Goodbye, nice to meet you. She does not respond. Giles comes over, no, whose bags, who whose will make sure that it gets to the cascade room and the busiest room, can't, and you sort it all out. And then you go off to settle in your rooms.

Unless there's something else you wanna do, what do you wanna do? As you maybe, as you're walking off to settle that, that woman's still watching all four of you. Going to gouge her eyes out if she does not stop staring at what we have been through so much again. And then we arrive here to rest. And not only is this chaos, also it's very fun. This lady I'm going to freak out. She does not stop staring. All right, all right.

Let's just get out of the room. I'm sure she's fine. Vaughn? Yes? If there are people lodging in your former chambers, you would have left things in there, then we should take an inventory of anything missing. Yes, yes I suppose so. There's some rather delicate books in there. I'm rather troubled by the idea that someone heard voices after staying in there.

I think we all of us have become acquainted with the power of the written word. True. Yes, um. Do you? In any case, if there is anything missing, we could take a look at the ledger and see who's been lodging in your room. Yes, yes, yes. Um, yeah, I suppose we'll do that. Do you have any siblings? Well, there's Bertie, of course.

Older than me, he'll he will, of course, inherit the baronet. What would he have to say of all of this? What would he have to say of all of this? It's in his inheritance. Well, according to my mother, this is only going to grow it by leagues and miles. I was shocked and thought that perhaps we'd fallen on hard times, and father's bonds had gone belly up. But good thing we're in the mid-20sies and it's up up up from here on. So nothing could possibly go wrong. I suppose Sounds like she's doing it out of boredom.

Rather sad really. I can't help but blame myself somewhat. Perhaps if I'd been less absent she'd be less inclined to fling open the door to evict Tom, Dick and Harry that cross the threshold. But yes, my brother is a businessman in Canada. Oh. Well, if my father's half as irked as she seemed then we tell him, this is going to be rather enjoyable. Yes, yes, your father. We'll sweep through. You're sweating again.

She's taking out a handkerchief. More sun lately than normal. Good God. Cut to a door opening and Margo and Carter entering their room. There are pictures of paintings of pool tables on the wall. With like dogs sitting around a table playing poker. This is one classy fucking joint,

I'll tell you that right now. Have they done to it? Okay. A book plates. Is this game? Oh, Billiards? Yeah, we call it 8 Ball. It's the best.

You take these balls, you hit them into these holes. So you take the ball and you chuck it at the... No, no, no. You have a long stick. It's called a cue, which I don't really understand. And then you have some chalk as involved. And then you're sort of... But I've never seen dogs play it. I didn't even know that they could do that.

That's pretty cool. There must be some dog version of the game that I'm not familiar with yet. Anyway, I'm happy to sleep. Is there like a chaise lounge? There's not two beds in here? There's just one bed? I don't know.

Let's find out as it's described. It appears there is just one bed in the room. I will sleep on the chaise lounge. No, no, no, no, no, no. I am not injured. I couldn't possibly put you, I'll sleep on the- Well, you're going to do that. It's not a thing.

What are you talking about? You have to sleep on the bed. Why can't I, I can sleep on the floor. It's the gaping holes in my gut. It's fine. I can, no. I am- Listen, then you try to get up in the morning

and then she opens her wounds again and you saw how easy it was for us to fix you before. I'll just have it, I'll put my bag on the bed, doesn't mean I'm sleeping on the bed. That's fine. Okay, listen. And then he like kind kind of checks out the door and he closes the door and he's like,

I, and then you kind of see his hand starts shaking. Do you need a drink? Are you hungover? I do need a drink. Is there a wet bar in the bedroom? There's a trip around. No, there was a, looked like a communal bar in the- Oh, I forgot.

I got my flask. Salon. Just opens the flask and just like takes a swig. It's just like, I, I haven't been hurt that bad since that fucking horse kicked me in the face. And I might have deserved that, and maybe I deserve this. I just want you to know, I don't want anything from you.

I mean, I- Do you want to sleep in the beds or not? No, no, it's not about the bed. It's not about the bed. It's not about the, it's, Jesus fuck, what am I talking about? I'm just saying I nearly didn't make it out of that mine. And I feel like it's important for me to say things that I feel inside.

And so it says, you're right. It says you should say how you feel. And I know what I know the rep that I've got here and I, it's, I brought it upon myself and I just want you to know you. I brought it upon myself and I just want you to know, you... Me? To know that I don't... I'm not trying to con you, I'm not trying to get anything from you or take anything from you. And I just want that out there.

And like, Carter's just like... I just don't understand why you feel the need to say this after you had a near-death experience. I just don't see the connection. You don't see the connection between almost dying and wanting to change the way that you live your life and the way that you interact with the people that you care about that matter to you, that are, that you share, um, uh, uh, air with. So, that's all. I'm just saying that.

Now, I should find that bar. I should find the alcohol. I just wasn't thinking you were trying to con me before, but maybe now I am. No, I'm not trying. No, I'm not. I don't know how to. Jesus Christ, how do you dig your way out of this hole?

I'm not conning you. She she's like kind of smiling at you and laughing at you now. Are you, wait, are you fucking with me? But I don't know how to do that. I'm so dry with my humor and I don't understand. You're smirking, you're giving me a German smirk. That's not a thing. That's totally a thing, I'm seeing it right now.

God damn it, you had me going. She pokes you in the side. Ow! Oh, sorry, oh Jesus. I'm seeing it right now. God damn it. You had me going. She pokes you in the side. Ow! Oh, sorry. Oh, Jesus. Stop spitting up blood. Stop being German! You're supposed to be here to relax and you're stressing me out with your feelings. Okay, anyway, that's all. I just wanted to say that. I thought I would be more drunk when I said that and I'm not. So that's... Maybe try again later.

Okay. Yeah, okay. Okay. And then it just starts like, opens his carpet bag, it's just like rummaging, but clearly has nothing to do. He's just trying to do like occupy himself. Okay, everything's here. That's good. Are you someone who needs to talk all the time and fills the air? No, not at all, not enough. Why would we give you that? Because we can do that, we can think of things we say to each other.

I'm just making sure that my three pairs of underwear are still in here. You only bring three? I bring like nine. For like a three-day trip, you never know. That's a good point, I didn't think this through. Clearly. And I bring like ten pairs of socks. It's not a bad call. This is fun, just chatting and feeling there, isn't it? Just chatting, just having a great time figuring out where I'm going to sleep in this room with this woman.

Maybe eventually the four of you come back out of your rooms and start mingling as best you can. There is a bar. I mean, you remember there used to be a grand piano where they now have a bar. The piano has been moved to a whole other room. There's so many family pictures of you and your mom and dad and your brother and they're all gone. It's all just been replaced with these benign sort of, you know, they're pretty but there's no substance.

Laugh love? Bless this mess. It's wine o'clock somewhere. Welcome to our ool. Notice there's no pee in it. Welcome to our ool. Notice there's no pee in it. Let's keep it that way. So many roosts.

But you sidle up to the bar and there's a young man that you recognize as the bartender. And you realize it was like he was like a stable hand when you were a kid and you haven't seen he wasn't around during the last visit. And now he's grown up a little bit and he's tending bar. Good looking kid. And he's like, oh, Mr. Villiers, you're back. I wasn't expecting you. Did you get to see your mother yet? Yes. Yes, I had the pleasure. We've been we've had a moment to speak. Good to see you. How are you finding the new arrangement? Oh, it was a little strange at first, but we're all kind of getting used to it. And, you know, we're paid. Well, we shouldn't be talking about this in front of you. But we're doing a little better now.

We're paid a little bit more now that the estate is bringing all these guests in. So it's been a weird transition, but at the end of the day, it's been great for everyone, especially your mom. She's been so lonely. She doesn't really have anyone except for you. So it's good of you to come home and see her. I know it means a lot to her. But look at me going on and on. Can I get you and your friends a drink? Yes. Whiskey all around, Mr. Stoker. You got it. Don't tell your mom, but I'm going to use the, I'm going to give you the good stuff. What's up, four beautiful glasses. They all have, uh, EGB&B etched on them.

It's like, alright. Here you go. Hey, can I keep one of these? I'll put it on your tab. I'll have to ask Giles about that. I just think it'd be such a great memento of Vaughn's childhood. This is our friends. I feel like we should be able to take a cup.

Um, I'm sure we should be able to take a cup. I'm sure it'll be fine. This is your your house after all. I mean, one day you'll you'll be the the innkeeper. That's the dream. Keep the glass. Would you fill my flask please for later? Oh, um, It's like a handsome or empty flask. Carry on Stoker. Carry on Stoker. Fill her up. Sure. Let me get a funnel. And he goes off. And as he goes off, that woman from before, like, tugs on your sleeve, Fae'ruz.

The woman with the pink dress, she's like, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I don't mean to... Choir, I just snuck up on me and that's all. Yeah. I just wanted to speak to you. This is strange. There are many spirits that surround the four of you. I find the noise to be rather unsettling. They're all vying to speak over each other towards me. I'm sorry, I'm- You don't say.

I'm what you would call a medium. I was just born with this ability to sort of hear and see beyond the veil. And I have a practice back in London, but I'm visiting my family and I stopped here. I just, I'm sorry. This is awkward. I just this there's so much noise Sorry, I Perfume Ectoplasm. Mm-hmm. It's just this is just so much noise Around there's no need to apologize miss pink. We feel reputation precedes you. Oh

Psych role on this? Her whole like, oh, I've been a medium my whole life. Sure. Mm. Psychology. You've been staring at us since you've gotten here. Of course we've seen you around. It's a success for me.

Success for you, okay. Obviously, it's a success for me. Success for you. Okay. Obviously, it's a weird, you'd be weirded out if someone came to your party now in 2024 and said, I'm a medium. It's just as weird here, even though you are so steeped in the occult. Now, maybe you're a little bit more open to it, or maybe your studies of it have made it even more crazy. But the fact that she's telling you she sees something it does seem genuine and and what you do notice with psychology is that she is actually holding back what looks like fear in talking to you I'm so sorry I

I shouldn't have come I just there's just so much noise. Miss Pink, was it? Yes, Jasmine Pink. I have a little shop in Soho, if you're ever in London. I'll be back there in a week's time, but... How long did you stay here? I've been here for three days. I'm just... my parents were tied up I thought that I would be meeting them earlier. I figured I would just take in the countryside on my way home

They'll be back tomorrow. So I'm leaving in the morning. I just Minute you walked in there was this this Overwhelming aura surrounding the four of you and so many voices were speaking to me all at once trying to tell me something. Would you care to join us for a drink or perhaps dinner? Well that would be lovely. I'll do you one better. Perhaps you would be interested in a Perhaps you would be interested in a seance. Ooh, those are so fashionable and I have not have yet attended one myself. I would be very interested.

That would be wonderful. Wouldn't we? Yes, I don't mean to be. Yeah, a stranger invites us to a seance, wearing all pink. Yeah, plus seances, I always heard those to be. Yeah, the stranger invites us to a seance wearing all pink. Yeah, it's plus seances. I always heard those are flim flam. Yes, I would have been inclined to call them just that, Tillinghouse, but

those aren't real though. This should be fine. Fragilous spirit. Have a care, Miss Pink. Miss Pink, if you would excuse us for just a moment. But of course, just quickly. Yes, Yes. Listen, I think any time I hear say on some medium, I think bunk right away.

But this woman does seem to. Have been touched, as it were, which who can blame? I mean, we've seen shit I never thought I'd seen before in my life. I think she is telling the truth here I just we've had people follow us in that old tiny town and then we get here and she's staring at us and now it's Yes, but she's old we could take spirits are around you and they're so loud like We can go play a little game I guess It doesn't hurt. I I'm putting on air of, oh, this is so entertaining.

I wouldn't give her all the information that we've obviously seen and experienced, but it doesn't hurt to hear her out. I think we're probably the real deal. I feel like we're probably the real shit. We have business cards. We got business cards. We've seen shit she wouldn't even believe.

We'd seen stuff that pink robes would just melt. Here's what we do. Perhaps we tell her nothing. And if she really is who she says she is, then she would pick up on something that she would have never have known otherwise. Yep, yeah. Oh yeah, good test. Yes. That's so easy. I won't talk to her at all until we start the seance.

Perfect, I didn't think you were going to say anything to her anyway. And then we can always tell her too that there's a voice up in Vaughn's old room too. Well, what if we don't say anything and she brings it up herself? Okay, yeah. And maybe if she doesn't then we could make it up. We'll play it by ear. Yes, yes. Vaughn, by the way, I can't believe you grew up with all this awesome art. And maybe if she doesn't then maybe we could break it up. We'll play it by ear. Yes, yes.

Vaughn, by the way, I can't believe you grew up with all this awesome art. I mean, no wonder you're so like, no wonder you're so like refined. Do you know what I mean? Like now I get it. Like I can see the Vaughn Villiers origin story, right? Like as a young lad looking up at this thing. Marco tries to jab you in your other side.

Ow, ow! But looking up at this thing that's like, oh, this looks like a lot of nonsense, right? But the long you stare at it, I swear I see a fucking sailboat in that one picture over there. And that is just so classy. Do you know what I mean? Ow! Stop it!

As you cross your eyes. Oh shit, she's still standing there. Oh, sorry. Oh my god. Oh yes, sorry. still standing there. Oh my god. Oh, yes, sorry so Would you would you be interested? I'm sure I could find space for us to do it in private I just would love to see it. There's so much activity surrounding you I would be remiss if I didn't at least approach you. It seems like you're you're open to it. Yes, it's free, right?

It's gonna be free Yes. Yes, I we are we are not in my office. Though if you could, if you enjoy the experience, perhaps you could tell your friends, if you know anyone in London. But no, this would be free of charge. I just, there's so much activity that I would be foolish not to try and commune

with these people who are trying to commune with you. That sounds delightful. Yes, we... We're quite curious, although have a care, Miss Pink. Opening up these sorts of channels, one never knows what sort of thing looks back. I thought this sort of thing was hokum and bunk. But, um, have a care what voices you let in. Excellent. I'll see you for dinner. It's a large communal table. I'll try to get a seat nearby and then we'll sneak off and talk to your spirits.

Great. And she walks away. With her flowing robe. What do you want to do before dinner? If anything. Let's tour the grounds. Let's just walk around outside. Ladies, you want to take a walk? I would love to.

Usually, I would guess that Von would give us a tour. But apparently, there are so many employees now that I'm sure any one of them would be able to tell us about all of these lovely paintings. I also wouldn't mind just maybe seeing if there's a doctor that stays here. I wouldn't mind just maybe seeing if there's a doctor that stays here, I wouldn't mind a little something for the pain, stitches or whatever I've got going on

is not working. Yes, I'm sure there's a doctor around here with morphine or opiates or whatever it is. Yes, we can bring some nice over the counter drugs. We should be able to bring a country doctor in to look at you, I think that's the capital idea. We don't need to make a big deal out of it. I'm just saying if we talk to somebody and they're a doctor and they happen to have a

bag full of, you know, laudanum, that's great. Someone with an appropriate medicine skill to give you some hit points back. Precisely. I would not object to that. They were saying that they might want to take a tour of the grounds as well. Very well. Yeah. Would you like to give us a tour? Or shall we have one of these employees?

I saw over there, I feel like I saw through the corner of my eye, there was a bunch of animals made out of foliage and one looked like a unicorn. I think we should check that out. Unicorn? Um. What have they done to the topiary?'s a topiary you don't remember there being.

You do see as you're milling about, your mother is like in the far corner of the room, she's speaking with some guests and she's just watching you and like still speaking to the guests and just blocking eyes with you Vaughn. And maybe if she sees that you see her, she just goes back to speaking with the guests. My mother is rather right. I don't feel precisely myself. When I look in the mirror, I can't help but admit it seems though I've wasted away somewhat. I mean, you know, we've all been through it, man. You're fine, you know. Chin up. And whatever they say over here, you know.

Bob's your uncle. Be okay. I was thinking, telling Ass, that, um, there is a part of me that being here is lapsed and Go she's all become it's still hope damn it There's a part of me that that feels as though one would like to Recover one's wits for a while Which which might entail departing from your company wait what? for a time what's my room when my vigor and strength of return, but you're saying that I

But if you if you think it's best that I stay with you I I don't break up the squad as it were and And I shan't take the time to really sit here and convalesce. You're quite right. Stiff up her lip, chin up and all that. Well, I don't want to be, you know. What do you think I should do, Tillinghast?

Don't put this on me, man. Uh, just we care about you. I think that's clear, right? The three of us, I think I speak just, we care about you. I think that's clear, right? The three of us. I think I speak for all of us. Yes. You're a bestie through and through. We want you to be good.

We want you to be healthy. I feel like there'd be a huge void if you weren't gone. I'm seeing things still as I see the center of things I see through the matter to the elemental spirit that animates them. Do you understand what I mean? Yeah, definitely not how I would describe how I am seeing things. But I don't know, man, maybe you're right. I want you to get your head right. I think we should all use some time to recuperate.

What I fear Vaughan is that I know that we have all seen things that if you tell any lay person they would label us mad and put us in an asylum and we just can't see what happened to you. What if you were to tell anybody that these things that we know that you've seen, but in the wrong hands that information, we're all that we have right now. They might look at me rather like they look at Miles Shipley.

When I looked into that poor man's eyes, I saw myself looking back and... And from time to time I feel as though I must be going mad. You don't think I'm mad, do you? No, no. Madness. No. Madness is when... No. We've seen these things with our own eyes, haven't we?

Yes, right. Yes, we all have seen it. It's reality that seems to bend itself around us. Yes, you're right. I think we just need, whatever happens, I think we just need to stick together and we could all use some time to recover and calm our nerves. Very well then. Look, you don't have to make, yeah. Just the things that we've seen.

Yeah. You don't have to make up your mind right now, you know? Well, let's just chill out in your family hotel. We are here to recuperate. Maybe just give it to, give it to a couple days, but I do see where you're coming from. Yeah. Have a cigarette.

The last two travels we've had, you have had bouts of you not being yourself and sometimes it gets dangerous like with Esa Painter's house. Yeah. Yes, I can do it. Will I miss you trying to kill me? Yeah, I guess a little bit but but also but also yeah, I also like it when you're not trying to kill me or any of us. Yes, I want you to trust me and I want to be worthy of your trust.

Just letting you know of it. How I'm feeling. Anyway, there's the tennis court. But what the hell have they done to it? He takes her around the grounds. Pickleball? Pickleball? What the? You can see that he's really upset by this and it's compounded by his mental state and

this is not making it better. So maybe Vaughn is stumbling over trying to explain things and at every turn something is different. Even the family graveyard seems to have been like covered over so as not to be an unsightly part of the grounds and it used to be like on full display and now you realize that like why did they move that? Oh, they don't want the guests to be bothered by that and there's you know, people using all of your stuff. There's family heirlooms that are now,

the guests are just playing with. We leave there and we cut to dinner. Big long table, all of the guests are invited to share a communal dinner, classic B&B. And you're all sitting there, Ms. Jasmine Pink is sitting across from one of you. And just if you look over from time to time, she's like, her eyes are just closed until she's like troubled. And then your mom makes this big entrance. This big grand entrance, she has a new robe on now,

and I imagine a part of you is like, this is what she always wanted. The show she gets to put on, and she stands at the head of the table, says, guests, guests, friends, thank you for spending some time here in our lovely home. It was not an easy decision to open up our family home, open up our doors to so many other people. We have a lot of memories here at Eggers Grange.

You know, at a certain point I just wanted to share those memories with others. And frankly, it's the best decision I've ever made. Tonight is a special occasion because another member of my family is here. My son, Von. Von is a decorated war hero. Yes, I'm going to brag about you. He is a world traveler and he has brought some friends with, Miss Feruschebron. Miss Schebron, you are most welcome here at Egil's Grange. Anyhow, let's eat.

And the servants come out, they lay all this food on the table. It's not anything like your home cooking you had growing up. And eventually the meal ends and Miss Pink whispers across the table, they told us this is a small room that we could use. No one's staying there right now. So if you'd like, we could go do this. I've already gone in there and set it up. Is that all right?

Lovely. Who exactly did you tell that we were having seance? Oh, I just spoke to Giles. I asked him if this is something we could accommodate. I did use your name, Mr. Villiers, otherwise I didn't know if he would give me space and he was most accommodating. And so I've gone in and I've lit some candles and everything. So if you're ready, we can do this. It shouldn't take long, but it might be illuminating. Well, shall we? Yes. Yes, I suppose.

So she walks you down all up the stairs and brings you to your brother's bedroom. And there is nothing of your brother left in this room. It's got one of those beds that go in the wall. Murphy bed? Murphy bed. It's got a Murphy bed that has been put up. This is what made it perfect for this first seance.

And there's chairs in a circle and several candles lit. And she says, please choose a seat and we'll get started. Slowly walk over and sit down in one of the chairs. Cross my legs, cross my arms. So charming. If you'd like, we could all join hands. Is this your first seance? Has anyone dabbled in this before?

I had a buddy in Haverhill who he had a racket where he would plug a bulb under a crystal ball and he'd put on this big turban with a feather on it and he'd say he's talking to like you know all these he's like I, he's talking to like, you know, all these, he's like, I got Billy the Kid on the horn, you know, stuff like that. But no, I never did, not something in a room with a Murphy bed, that's for sure. Yes, don't worry too much about the surroundings.

Just, if I were to give you any advice, just open your mind and your heart to what may or may not occur. You have lots of loved ones and friends I imagine. Maybe they will visit us this evening. I will say sometimes this can get emotional, but just sort of breathe into it. All right, come now, she told us to hold hands, Margo. And she, like, Faeruz will hand out one of her hands and then she'll look over, look, at Tillinghast

for the other. Good. Yeah, here we go. Mm-hmm. Hold Margo's hand, hold Vaan's hand. Yep. Here we go. Hold Margo's hand, hold Vaughn's hand. Yep.

And she closes her eyes. Maybe some of you join her, maybe some of you don't. And she begins chanting, like a low. Ooh. And within seconds, you think this is a corneous nonsense you've ever been a part of. She starts swaying a little bit. It just seems sort of dramatic. And if you were skeptical at all, you're almost ready to leave. Then you notice, those of you who kept your eyes open, the candles start to,

the wicks, the little flames start to move in one direction, like a wind just came into the room. But you don't feel the presence of wind, but you see all of the candles flickering in one direction, like they're being pushed by an unseen breeze. Oh, she continues moaning. And then all of the candles go out except one, one nearest her and she stops. And she opens her eyes and there are no pupils there. They've like gone up into the back of her head and her mouth starts moving, but nothing's coming out.

And then you hear a voice that is nothing like her voice, and you, Vaughn, recognize it as the voice of your father. Says, Vaughn! Get down from there! Martyrs! Vaughn, get down from there! Father? Son? Father?

Son? And then the voice changes. Father? And then the voice changes and you hear a voice that you all recognize. Make sure you dry the Pisco Sour here. It's legendary. Don't suppose if you know where my pipe is, do you? Can't seem to find it anywhere. The voice of Jax and Elias and the medium just looks at all of you. No pupils. Taking on the mannerisms. Jaxon. Ah, there it is.

You have a light. This is mimes have a light. Stop it. It's mimes holding a pipe. Stop it. Fancega, Fancega, they are among you, with their pretty yellow nooses. What? This isn't funny. Yeah, it's not cool. Mmm. Si un hombre no se levanta el sombrero, anti ti asiguramente un delfino. Don't forget that.

Don't forget that. Ha ha ha. Ah. Oh, my friends. Jackson. There are shadows following my every step. Last night, the fog seemed to chase me to my hotel. Felt like it was trying to get inside me. I think they know that I know. I gotta get out of London. I gotta get out of London before

they get me. Who is trying to get you Jackson? Suddenly her like neck starts like fricking It starts going like Back and like it almost looks like it's gonna pop right off and then she becomes suddenly still and her neck is elongated and a voice comes out that is so disjointed and weird. It sounds like sounds overlapping that are trying to funnel themselves into a language that your mind can interpret. It's just like, Grrrr... Look at you now.

You've come a long way since the pyramids. You tried to cut my tongue off in New York. Yet look, I still speak. She opens her mouth and tongue like aaaaaaah, shoots out wildly almost like mocking you. Four of you up against countless others, working in my name. My name! The time has come. The time for chaos. And all of a sudden, Ms. Jasmine Pink bursts into flames. What?

And we'll see you next week. No! What? And we'll see you next week. No! What? I didn't think about this being dangerous for her. At all. Margo's still just like, whatever. She's really good, okay? Yeah, yeah.

She's good. Yeah! That's all. That's why you play the game, baby. Oh, man. ["The Niche"] It's time to make your membership official. Start your 30-day free trial today and become an official member of The Niche at jointheniche.com with the promo code GCN30.

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